October 7, 2025 • 30 mins
Ken Miller’s story is one of radical resilience. From growing up in the foster care system to attending Dartmouth, battling addiction, and serving time as a three-time felon, Ken’s journey is a testament to the power of second chances.
In this episode of The Uncommon Leader Podcast, host John Gallagher sits down with Ken to explore:
👉His spiritual awakening and mindset shift
👉The leadership lessons learned behind bars
👉How he built five successful businesses
👉His mentorship philosophy for Black men
👉The message behind his book Becoming Ken
👉His billboard mantra: “Forgive others and self. Today.”
Ken reminds us that your past doesn’t define your future—and that leadership starts with authenticity, respect, and grace.
🔗 Resources & Links
📘 Get Ken’s book Becoming Ken on Amazon
🌐 Visit kenmillerspeaks.com
📲 Connect with Ken on LinkedIn: @KenMiller84
🎯 Watch the full episode: https://youtu.be/WmficLeNcaA
🔔 Subscribe for weekly leadership insights
#UncommonLeaderPodcast #ResilientLeadership #FaithDrivenGrowth #KenMillerSpeaks #BecomingKen #SecondChances #LiveBoldly
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_02 (00:00):
And if I can do it, you can do it.
(00:02):
And then do it with a smile, doit with laughter, do it with
grace, do it with tolerance, anddo it with probably the most
important word, which is love.
And so, David, so when you seethat book, because look at the
title, there's a very importantreason why that title is
becoming ten.
I'm Ken today.
(00:22):
I'm a kind and gentle62-year-old black male.
But before you didn't call meKen.
You called me my street name ormy concentration, or you call me
ex-convict, or you call me armrobber, or you call me
kidnapper.
All the things I have done.
That's what you call me.
You call me drug addict orcrackhead or alcoholic.
That's what you called me.
(00:43):
But today just call me Ken.
It's not Mr.
Miller, you know, whatevercertificates I have behind my
name.
It's not that.
Just call me Ken.
And that's what I became.
And I'm very, very comfortablewith being that.
So when you see that book andyou see Becoming Ken, become the
best you because you can.
SPEAKER_00 (01:09):
Uncommon leaders, welcome back.
This is the Uncommon LeaderPodcast.
I'm your host, John Gallagher,and today I'm honored to have a
guest whose journey trulyembodies the spirit of an
uncommon leader.
He's gone from Ivy League toincarceration, from prison to
the president of DenaliFinancial Strategies and
Planning.
Quite a story that we're goingto learn a lot about today.
(01:31):
And he's the author of thepowerful new book, Becoming Ken.
Those of you watched on YouTube,you can see it behind his
shoulder and a QR code to learnmore about him as well.
But he's a true testament towhat I think is the power of
resilience.
He's a champion for those whobelieve in second chances.
We're going to learn a lot aboutthat as well.
And a living example that yourpast does not define your
future, and that we are mostpowerfully positioned to help
(01:54):
the people that we once were.
So we're going to get to thecore of that as we go through it
and ultimately how we can leadfrom authenticity and from
purpose.
So, Ken, welcome to the UncommonLeader Podcast.
Great to have you on the show.
How are you doing today?
SPEAKER_02 (02:05):
Oh, I'm doing fantastic.
I'm looking forward to it.
And thank you, John, forinviting me to be a guest.
SPEAKER_00 (02:10):
Absolutely, Ken.
Well, we're going to get into itright off the bat.
I'm going to jump right intoyour book and I'm going to read
an excerpt from yourintroduction that's going to
kick things off and get yougoing right off the bat.
So here's what it said.
I still had a single rock ofcrack in my pocket.
And for one of the only times inmy life, I didn't smoke it.
Instead, I decided to sell it.
Let me say that again.
I was a chronic user with a pipein hand day and night, yet I was
(02:33):
about to hand that rock tosomeone else.
Could that have been divineintervention?
Who knows?
But I approached a car in theQuick Mart lot that in hindsight
screamed undercover.
I handed the driver the rock,took the 20, and turned away.
And then sirens shouting, handspulling me down onto scorching
asphalt.
SPEAKER_02 (02:53):
Yeah, I was there.
That's me.
But you know, how do how did Iget there?
You know, how did I get there?
Yeah, before we get started,I've always liked to allow the
listeners and the people thatare looking and observing this
podcast to understand that todayI'm a successful businessman.
I own five businesses.
I'm very successful in a lot ofworlds.
(03:13):
And we'll get a chance,hopefully, to talk about some of
those.
But to get to that point, I hadto overcome some obstacles and
overcome really me.
You know, you can blame it onenvironmental, you can blame it
on, you know, people, howthey've treated you.
But in the end, it was a lot ofit was my self-talk and how I
looked at the world.
So to set a foundation, to setthe table for who I am today,
(03:38):
but how I got to the person I amto be an uncommon leader.
Let's start off at birth.
1962, my mother was a whiteteenage runaway.
My dad was a black pimp and drugdealer.
That's what he was.
I am the byproduct of thatquote-unquote relationship.
I was put up for adoption atbirth.
(03:59):
Biracial children were not verycommon in 1962.
In some places, it would havebeen even worse, but this was
New York at least.
And so I was put up foradoption.
And I went through, I wasn'tadopted, but I went through the
foster care system for sixyears.
At age six, I was adopted byIrene and Sam Miller.
At that point, I could not read,I could not write, I could not
(04:23):
tell time, nor could I even tiemy shoes at age six.
So I had to learn something inthat first few months.
But I was broken going into thatrelationship.
I fell in love with reading onceI was taught how to read.
And by the second grade, I wasreading at the fifth grade
level.
I was what you would callprecocious.
I was a national merit scholarat age 17.
(04:46):
I was accepted to Harvard.
I went to Dartmouth Ivy Leagueas my undergrad.
And while in Dartmouth, Iunfortunately graduated with a
major in fraternity with a minorin drinking.
That was my major.
But I did get out.
Went to my first treatmentcenter, and I can go through
this somewhat quickly.
Within two years, I relapsed offof my first opportunity of being
(05:09):
sober at age 21.
And by the time I was 23, I washomeless.
And I mean homeless on thestreets.
And I was to spend the next 20years either homeless in
treatment and halfway houses orincarcerated.
I am a three-time convictedfelon.
I've been to prison threedifferent occasions.
(05:29):
And on the last bit, I did threeyears for the drug sales of a$10
rock of crack cocaine.
But I always remember what thejudge said to me at that point
when I was being sentenced forthe third felony.
He said to me, Mr.
Miller, if you come in mycourtroom one more time, and a
felony is stealing$51 as afelony in the state of Nevada.
(05:52):
He said, I will give you thehabitual criminal statute, which
is 25 to life.
That was in 2004.
Some people say, Did you believehim?
I tell people, I still believehim.
What do you mean, did I believehim?
I still believe in him.
And then 21 years later, I justcelebrated 21 years clean and
sober on the 23rd of Septemberof this year.
So I have some time underneathmy, but there was still a lot of
(06:15):
growth.
But that gets you a just a verybasic on some of the things that
I had to overcome.
There are more, but we call itresilience.
But really what it is is thecomeback from the setback.
And I had a few setbacks alongthe way.
And you know, even when I gotout, there were some things I
still needed to work on just tobe able to do life well.
SPEAKER_00 (06:39):
I appreciate you sharing.
Uh and then again, the otherword we kind of talked about
even before we hit the recordbutton was vulnerability in
terms of sharing your story.
And yeah, overcome would be uhone of the words, resilience
would be another word, and youknow, adversity, you know.
I mean, some people faceadversity when they try to get
into school, but you've clearlyfaced a significant amount of
(07:02):
adversity uh on your way tosuccess.
Now, it might have been thatmoment uh where you heard that
and maybe you still hear thattoday, but what's been the most
difficult mindset shift for youto move from you know the
challenges that you had, and youprobably frankly uh still face
those challenges every day,personally in your mind, to
(07:24):
success?
SPEAKER_02 (07:25):
I don't face too many challenges to success.
I am successful.
I'm also well, and what I meanby that is I do life well.
There's a thing we call thevicissitudes of life.
Those are the ups and downs.
I handle them well.
I'm competent to life, but Isolve the same problems in any
other human.
I have relationship situations.
We have health issues with oldercohort.
(07:46):
There's financial things thathappen in my businesses.
I own five businesses.
So believe me, between the five,there's financial things that
come up.
But I'm competent to them, or Ihave individuals that either
work for me or contract with methat are competent and can
handle, let's say, the businesspart.
But I you you had mentionedsomething about what the judge
(08:07):
said.
What the judge said didn'treally resonate.
I remember it.
I remember it very well, butthat wasn't going to change me.
I've been threatened with a lotof things.
I've been threatened with guns,with knives, with you know,
sentences, uh, with uh theprosecutor.
So I've been threatened.
That part doesn't make changefor me, you know, because all it
(08:28):
is to me is you're threateningme with more pain.
I have a very high painthreshold.
You could not live the way Ilived as a street level addict
and alcoholic without having ahigh pain threshold.
But then again, the painthreshold is limited.
And at some point you want thepain to end, and that's when
suicide becomes a viable.
(08:49):
And I've been I've had suicideattempts, two of them years ago.
So I'm not there anymore.
But anyway, I would like to justtalk real quick about the pivot.
So I I was arrested September22nd, 2004.
And uh I went into jail.
I celebrate September 23rd, ismy sobriety date.
It's the day after I wasarrested.
October of that year, 2004, Iwas laying on my bunk, Unit 13,
(09:14):
Parr Boulevard, which is in thejail for Washoe County in
Nevada.
And God spoke to me.
God's been speaking to me often,and you can define it any way
you want to, but it's aconversation I'm having in my
head that is outside of myneeds, wants, desires that I
would say is positive.
(09:36):
And so what the conversationvery simply said is that your
journey is not going to bewithout discomfort, it's not
going to be without pain, but Iwill be there.
And together we can walk throughthis.
We can walk through this.
And ever since that day, I'vebeen cool.
I've been cool.
I've had definitely challengesand setbacks and and things, but
I've never used, I've never hurtanyone physically, I've never uh
(09:58):
threatened anyone.
Well, I could have a threat, butthat's just a threat.
But I've I've been I've been onthe journey.
The journey still consists ofdoing a lot.
But once that happened, the atleast the use of a chemical to
change my perception of realityleft me.
That what left me was the choiceand the decision.
Really, the decision.
(10:19):
The choice is always there.
It's what you decide, because adecision is a choice with action
behind it.
And what I've decided is I willnever pick up volitionally a
mind-altering chemical.
Okay, so that part's taken careof.
I go to prison, I was sentencedto six years for a$10 rock of
crack cocaine.
I went into prison, I said tomyself that if I'm the same
(10:43):
person going into prison that Iam coming out, or I'm the same
person coming out that I amgoing in, I'm gonna have the
same results.
So I had to work on thephysical, I had to work on the
intellectual, I had to work onthe emotional, and I had to work
on the spiritual.
And I work on that.
And once I did that over thenext three years, because a lot
I did three years, at least gaveme footing to deal with society
(11:06):
and the world and my exterior orexternal world.
I still had things I had to workon.
I still had to learn how to be,you know, be a businessman, how
to be a leader, how to work witha team, and then also how to
deal with some of the thingsthat I had that was baggage that
I had since I was a child.
And I worked on them.
(11:27):
And I this is my belief.
I've been good for about fouryears.
I mean, I've got to the level,and and this is real important
that I say this, John.
I've said it on a few otheroccasions.
Because I am well, I can giveout, and that's what I do.
I give out for free often.
Or if you're a client, or if youhire me to speak, but I give
out.
(11:48):
I'm not worried about alwaysworking on me.
I'm good with good.
I'm good with very good.
I don't need to be great.
I don't have the capacity to begreat.
I'm 62.
If I'm gonna be great inanything, I'm gonna be a great
grandfather to the kids.
I'm gonna be a great husband,but I don't worry about being
great in business.
I don't worry about being greaton podcasts or speaking.
(12:11):
I want to be very good so that Ican now give this gift to give
back to others.
SPEAKER_00 (12:19):
And again, you talk about that journey, even in
those three years, how do youyou had to prepare yourself
spiritually, emotionally, uh,again, as a leader inside of
that space.
You come out and you know, youprobably don't become a
successful business person rightoff the bat when you come out.
But were there disciplines thatyou learn there that you still
(12:39):
use today to be successful inyour business to help you get
through those times?
SPEAKER_02 (12:43):
100%.
There are lessons that you canlearn in the penitentiary if you
so choose that will bear wellfor you.
You can learn lessons anywhere.
You can learn them in the streeton the streets, you can learn
them in the boardroom, you canlearn them on the sporting
fields.
I learned things from sportsabout being a team player, about
being a leader on a team.
(13:05):
But I learned in prison the bestthing I learned in prison is how
to treat people with respect.
Because if you don't do it,there will be repercussions.
And so, what is respect?
So I'm writing a whole book.
It's my next book that's comingout, is on respect and
disrespect.
And it's also, and it's talkingabout respect in the
communities, whether it's theboardroom or on the streets or
(13:28):
in the family.
But what does respect mean?
What is disrespect?
And how do you increase yourrespect for others?
But anyway, respect is onething, real simple.
It's acknowledgement of aperson's position or stature
within a community.
And the community could be thecommunity of the family.
(13:49):
We have a thing called when wetalk about our elders, our G Ma
or grandmothers.
You know, my children give me,I'm talking the grandchildren,
give me respect because I'm theG PA.
Okay.
When we talk about on in on thestreets, I got respect as a drug
dealer because you need toacknowledge my position as a
drug dealer.
When I'm in the boardroom andI'm the board chair, and I've
(14:12):
been I've chaired a few boardsover the years.
You respect that.
I used to tell people, I said,go to your first board meeting
and see sit in the boardchairperson's seat.
Try that one, okay?
Because you're not respectingthat individual, usually sits at
a certain position where thatperson can take an input from
either side of the room, eitherthe side of the table, whatever.
(14:34):
But and it's also a position ofrespect because our eyes are
drawn to that individual at theend of the table as the chair.
Yeah, and there's hundreds ofexamples, but I learned that,
and then there's one lastcommunity.
We are all children of God.
That's this is my belief.
I'm not gonna go into you knowspiritual or Bible or anything
like that, but we're children ofGod.
(14:55):
There's a greater community thatI will treat you with respect
because I will acknowledge thatyou're a child of God, and
therefore I treat everyone withrespect.
SPEAKER_00 (15:05):
Can I love that?
And as you were going throughthat respect definition and that
level of authority that exists,there was a biblical picture as
you said that that came to mymind as you walked through that
and understanding that uh it'snot about necessarily just
position as well, but there'salso influence that comes into
play there and an overall, youknow, golden rule philosophy of
(15:29):
uh if we want to be treated acertain way, then we should be
respecting and treating others acertain way as well.
Thank you for sharing that.
Again, outside of that, from abiblical perspective, I
absolutely think it's there inthat we're called to respect
authority uh as individuals andrecognize that.
Now, again, in your business,the other side of what you've
talked about, the success inyour business is also
(15:51):
mentorship.
And that's become reallyimportant for you on your
journey, also, whether it's as athe director or chairman of a
board or in and it might be uhin some other space outside of
the business.
Is there a specific story thatyou have maybe in the past few
years in your mentorship?
And common leaders, hope you'reenjoying the episode so far.
(16:11):
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(16:31):
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Now, let's get back to theepisode.
Uh extremely, uh let's say, uhinspired by or encouraged by uh
(16:52):
the relationship that you've hadand the and the success that
you've had.
SPEAKER_02 (16:55):
Okay.
So I've been mentoring for 15years.
I mentor men of color.
I don't mentor women.
I don't mentor Caucasians.
That's my choice, my decision.
I'm comfortable with it.
And I also know that there'ssuch a need for black male
mentorship within the black malecommunity.
I've been doing it, I'vementored probably 40, 50 men.
(17:17):
I have active 12 right now.
At one point I had 28 active,but I had to call it back.
Sure.
But I just want to get to thementorship part and then tell
you the story.
So when I sit down with a man,now it's all Zoom.
I used to do them all in person,but when I sit down with a man,
the first thing I do is I say,you know, this, we're here to
talk about being mentored.
(17:37):
This is an explicitrelationship.
It is free, it is open-ended.
I've been mentoring my oldestgentleman for 15 years
regularly.
Then after we've got thefoundation built, the footing
built, I look them in the eyeand I say very simply, I have
one responsibility to you.
(17:58):
And that responsibility is toengender your dream.
What is your dream?
And I give you permission todream.
And then I shut up.
And I've had guys say 10 minutesbecause a lot of times people
have pulled away or taken fromthem the ability to dream.
So we define the dream.
So now we'll bring it up.
(18:18):
Five years ago, four or fiveyears.
Remember, I've been doing thisfor 15 years.
About four or five years ago,one of my mentees calls me up
and he said, Hey, Ken, can wemeet?
You know, over lunch orsomething like that.
And I said, Coffee usually.
I said, sure.
And uh I meet with him and hesaid it came true.
I'm like, I said, what?
He said, remember we sat downand I had this dream for this,
this, and this to happen.
(18:39):
And he began crying.
A grown black man began cryingbecause his dream became true.
It became a truth.
And he was there to thank me.
And I'm like, no, you did it.
I put certain things in placeand I supported you.
So maybe I didn't give you acouple dollars to do this or
that.
That's no big you did because Ialways wanted to always go back
(19:01):
to you.
But he's crying.
And this is a six foot two,three, 230-pound boxer that had
a dream, and that dream cametrue.
So people ask me, why do I doit?
And I have another one likethat, but that I'll just use
that one.
That's why I do it.
Because it's the right thing todo, is why I do it.
But when you get that type offeedback, you're like, why would
I even question doing this?
(19:22):
I never have questioned.
I've been doing it, like I said,15 years straight.
SPEAKER_00 (19:26):
Ken, I love that from the mentoring standpoint.
And I giving someone thepermission to dream, defining
what that dream is to them rightfrom the start.
Because once they do know whatthat dream is and that they can
articulate what that dream is,it's then, to your point, and
you said this earlier, you canthen make a choice.
Because, you know, I've oftensaid that the displeasure that
(19:46):
you will change, you will movetoward that dream when the
displeasure of remaining whereyou are is greater than the
discomfort of the change itselfthat's going to require.
Because once you've made thatdream and you've communicated
that, you've articulated that,now you've got a choice to make.
Am I going to move toward thatdream and make that happen?
And how do I know?
(20:07):
You've done that in mentoringother black men, you've done
that in your businesses as well.
How have you encouraged?
How have you developed theleaders inside of your
businesses and been able toscale?
I mean, to run five businesseswhere you've been.
What are some of those skills?
SPEAKER_02 (20:22):
So I didn't have these skills when I first
started.
So I get out of prison.
Only thing I could get was a jobpart-time in a warehouse.
Remember, I hadn't worked likelegitimately for like 20 years
and got fired from that job.
They fired all the ex-felons.
So I lost that one.
And I was fortunate enough toreturn to Anchorage, Alaska, and
(20:45):
got a white-collar job, food andbeverage supervisor for the
convention center.
And now I have a large team of20, 30.
And again, I had to learn someskill sets that I did not have,
but I'm a quick learner.
The first thing I had to learnwas, and I didn't know this, not
everybody thinks like I think.
(21:05):
Okay.
And I'm what they call a, youknow, a concrete sequential.
I'm a real bullet point person.
I'm a task-oriented person.
I'm there's nothing artsy oremotional about my quote unquote
business.
Okay.
But I thought everybody thoughtlike I did.
And I didn't know people didn'tthink like that.
But this doesn't mean that myway is right and yours is wrong.
(21:28):
We can still get to the desiredresult.
Okay.
We can still solve for theproblem.
It's just like you're going togo a different way to do it.
I'll do, you know, longarithmetic or you know, long
division, you'll do shortdivision.
We still get to the same answer.
Okay.
So that was literally one of thefirst things I had to learn.
The second thing I had to learnis that I had to treat people
(21:49):
and understand that people arehuman.
There wasn't a lot of grace whenI first became a people and
understand that people arehuman.
There wasn't a lot of grace whenI first became a people and
understand that people arehuman.
There wasn't a lot of graceleader.
Okay.
Wasn't a lot of grace.
And because that's somewhat notthe way I worked, but again,
(22:11):
it's not about me.
It's about my staff members,it's about my team leads.
It's about my contractors.
And then probably the thirdthing that I had to learn, the
third lesson, and this is inbusiness.
I mean, I have so many things Icould talk about about business
itself.
But in business with people,because in the end, it's always
(22:31):
about the people.
It's going to be your largestitem on your on your loss, your
profit and loss, your PL, yourexpenses is almost always going
to be, it's not cost of goodssold, it's going to be employees
and people.
But the other thing that I hadto learn is that I, and this is
something I learned to do, is Iwanted to grow them.
(22:54):
I wanted them, I wanted to makethem.
Maybe I took that from thementorship.
I wanted to make them what'syour dream?
I didn't really sit down and saythat with them because I'm not
mentoring.
But where do you want to go inthis field?
This isn't important.
Let me just say that.
I come from the school, you'renot going to be with me forever.
Period.
But what can I do to help yougrow in your skill set?
(23:16):
Accounting, marketing, uhfundraising, sales, whatever
your skill set that you choose,what can what conferences can I
send you to?
What coaches can I hire for you?
What can I do to make because inthe end, what I want is for you
to do whatever responsibilitiesyou have to your loved ones or
to self.
(23:36):
And that's truly the way Ithink.
And so that grace, space,learning, you know, those it
just those are just some I couldspeak on this one for a while,
but hopefully those three areKen.
SPEAKER_00 (23:48):
I love those as three principles.
And as you said, whether it'sbusiness success in the terms of
profitability or impact andthose types of things, those
three things are people relatedfor you.
I mean, not everyone thinks likeyou, right?
So giving them the space tothink, as you said, grace.
And you mentioned this.
I mean, I often talk about thata kind leader will have truth
(24:09):
and grace.
And someone who delivers truth,I mean, it can be done, but they
often will come across as abully, bully.
But some or that are onlydelivering with grace and no
truth.
Then you're too soft.
Go ahead, Ken.
SPEAKER_02 (24:20):
Yeah.
I have one more I have to do.
Yeah, absolutely.
Oh, because I loved it because Iwas given that.
You have space to fail.
You have space to fail.
I made a mistake early on when Iwent back into like the
corporate, and uh my executivedirector, I was working for a
nonprofit, called me in andsaid, This is what has happened,
dot, dot, dot.
(24:40):
But keep trying.
You've done 10 great things, andyou got this one that did not
work out.
Cost us a couple dollars, butyou brought in 50 times more,
five times more.
And I learned a lesson therebecause people who are afraid to
fail because of therepercussions or the feedback
they think they may get, they'realso afraid to do risk.
(25:03):
And many times we have to dorisk to grow or to scale the
business.
We have to.
So, all the people who work withme know, hey, if you make a
mistake, just let me know.
Let's fix it, let's move on.
What can we learn from it?
And let's move on.
SPEAKER_00 (25:17):
Yeah, space to fail, love it.
And again, it's gonna fall rightin the midst of that grace box
as well.
If you're just delivering alltruth and no grace, they're not
gonna take a risk.
They're not gonna grow, you'renot gonna be able to scale your
business.
Four phenomenal principles uhthat would help many leaders
scale their business.
Ken, I I can't believe how fastour time has gone.
I'm gonna take a couple morequestions, but I'm gonna come
(25:37):
back to your book.
Ken, and I often talk about thebook test.
Somebody reads your book andthen they put it up on a shelf,
much like the shelf behind me, alot of books that are sitting
there that I've read before.
But when they look at that booksix months later and they see
the binding of that book that'ssitting up on the shelf, what do
you want them to think?
What do you want them to feelwhen they see that, when they
(26:00):
see that book sitting there?
What do you what do you wantthem to have thought and felt
about your book?
I can do it.
SPEAKER_02 (26:06):
If he can do it, and I'm I hate to do absolutes.
My the depths of my negativethings that happen to me are
like at the 99th percentile.
Okay, three times been in situI've I've had my jaw broken
twice, my nose broken, my eyeorbital broken in fights.
I've been guns pulled on me,I've had knives to my chest,
(26:27):
I've been in the hospitalbecause of situations, three
times in prison, 20 years anaddict on the streets.
And if I can do it, you can doit.
And then do it with a smile, doit with laughter, do it with
grace, do it with tolerance, anddo it with probably the most
important word, which is love.
And so anyway, so when you seethat book, because remember the
(26:51):
title, there's a very, veryimportant reason why that title
is becoming Ken.
I'm Ken today.
I'm a kind and gentle62-year-old black male.
But before you didn't call meKen, you call me my street name
or my penitentiary name, or youcall me ex-convict, or you call
me arm robber, or you call mekidnapper.
All things I have done.
(27:12):
That's what you call me.
Or you call me drug addict orcrackhead or alcoholic.
That's what you called me.
But today, just call me Ken.
It's not Mr.
Miller, you know, whatevercertificates I have behind my
name.
It's not that.
Just call me Ken.
And that's what I became.
And uh I'm very, verycomfortable with being that.
So when you see that book andyou see becoming Ken, become the
best you because you can.
SPEAKER_00 (27:34):
Ken, that is great.
I I love that.
I I'm going to give you my lastquestion here in just a minute.
I know those who are watching onYouTube, they've got your QR
code behind you in terms ofgetting in touch with you.
Those who are just listening onaudio or others, how can they
get in touch with you, learnmore, learn more about you?
Where do you want them to go toget your book?
SPEAKER_02 (27:52):
The books on Amazon becoming Ken.
If you want to book me thisweek, or really, you can also
get in contact with me throughmy website, which is
KenMillerSpeaks.com.
Took a long time to come up withthat name.
And then I'm LinkedIn, KenMiller84 is my hand on LinkedIn.
And let me just say this (28:10):
I respond to everybody who reaches
out to me.
Everybody who reaches out to me.
I don't have any fear.
What am I supposed to do thefear?
And plus, it's not aninconvenience to me.
Thank you for reaching out.
If you got a question aboutanything we've spoken about,
reach out to me and I'llrespond.
SPEAKER_00 (28:28):
Ken, I know that you've been a gift, Ken Miller84
on LinkedIn.
I'll put the links to these inthe show notes as well so that
folks can get back to it.
I have truly enjoyed our timetoday.
I want to give you the last wordhere in one minute with regards
to a question, but I got to tellyou again, uh, folks are
listening in, there aren't manystories, as you said, that he
can take you through the laundrylist of things that he was
(28:50):
called before.
And I love one of the things yousaid, Ken, during this session,
though.
And again, we don't make thisnecessarily biblical, but as a
man of faith as well, I thinkit's very important that you are
a child of God as well, and thatKen is the name that I will call
you as well.
And I respect and honor you withwhat you've shared with us
today.
I want to throw this at you.
I'm going to give you abillboard.
(29:11):
You may have answered this alittle bit already, but I give
you a chance to maybe go alittle bit more formal.
You can put that billboardanywhere you want to.
I want you to put a message onthat billboard, though, for our
listeners and for those whowould drive by that billboard.
What's that message that youwould put on that billboard and
why do you put that message on?
SPEAKER_02 (29:28):
So many.
I've had a lot of billboards,but I'll just do one.
And what I would say, forgive.
Forgive others and forgive self.
Today.
That's what I'm saying.
And that's a that's a decisionthat's done here.
And you can make that decision.
But I would just say forgiveothers and self.
And in the lower right handcorner, I'd have today.
SPEAKER_00 (29:46):
Today.
Love that.
Ken, thank you so much for beinga guest on the Uncommon Leader
podcast.
I know that folks are going tofind value in this.
Listeners, I encourage you, goout right now before you end
this conversation and follow Kenon LinkedIn.
Get a copy of his book and checkout his website, no doubt about
it.
And if you got all the way tothis point in the conversation,
you've done really well.
(30:07):
I would encourage you to sharethis episode with someone else
that you know needs to listen tothis episode as well.
And go ahead and give it a fivestar review while you're there
because Ken uh deserves whatthat is.
And I I I know that he wants tohear from you as well.
So go connect with him.
Until next time, go and growchampions.
And if I can do it, you can do it.
(00:02):
And then do it with a smile, doit with laughter, do it with
grace, do it with tolerance, anddo it with probably the most
important word, which is love.
And so, David, so when you seethat book, because look at the
title, there's a very importantreason why that title is
becoming ten.
I'm Ken today.
(00:22):
I'm a kind and gentle62-year-old black male.
But before you didn't call meKen.
You called me my street name ormy concentration, or you call me
ex-convict, or you call me armrobber, or you call me
kidnapper.
All the things I have done.
That's what you call me.
You call me drug addict orcrackhead or alcoholic.
That's what you called me.
(00:43):
But today just call me Ken.
It's not Mr.
Miller, you know, whatevercertificates I have behind my
name.
It's not that.
Just call me Ken.
And that's what I became.
And I'm very, very comfortablewith being that.
So when you see that book andyou see Becoming Ken, become the
best you because you can.
SPEAKER_00 (01:09):
Uncommon leaders, welcome back.
This is the Uncommon LeaderPodcast.
I'm your host, John Gallagher,and today I'm honored to have a
guest whose journey trulyembodies the spirit of an
uncommon leader.
He's gone from Ivy League toincarceration, from prison to
the president of DenaliFinancial Strategies and
Planning.
Quite a story that we're goingto learn a lot about today.
(01:31):
And he's the author of thepowerful new book, Becoming Ken.
Those of you watched on YouTube,you can see it behind his
shoulder and a QR code to learnmore about him as well.
But he's a true testament towhat I think is the power of
resilience.
He's a champion for those whobelieve in second chances.
We're going to learn a lot aboutthat as well.
And a living example that yourpast does not define your
future, and that we are mostpowerfully positioned to help
(01:54):
the people that we once were.
So we're going to get to thecore of that as we go through it
and ultimately how we can leadfrom authenticity and from
purpose.
So, Ken, welcome to the UncommonLeader Podcast.
Great to have you on the show.
How are you doing today?
SPEAKER_02 (02:05):
Oh, I'm doing fantastic.
I'm looking forward to it.
And thank you, John, forinviting me to be a guest.
SPEAKER_00 (02:10):
Absolutely, Ken.
Well, we're going to get into itright off the bat.
I'm going to jump right intoyour book and I'm going to read
an excerpt from yourintroduction that's going to
kick things off and get yougoing right off the bat.
So here's what it said.
I still had a single rock ofcrack in my pocket.
And for one of the only times inmy life, I didn't smoke it.
Instead, I decided to sell it.
Let me say that again.
I was a chronic user with a pipein hand day and night, yet I was
(02:33):
about to hand that rock tosomeone else.
Could that have been divineintervention?
Who knows?
But I approached a car in theQuick Mart lot that in hindsight
screamed undercover.
I handed the driver the rock,took the 20, and turned away.
And then sirens shouting, handspulling me down onto scorching
asphalt.
SPEAKER_02 (02:53):
Yeah, I was there.
That's me.
But you know, how do how did Iget there?
You know, how did I get there?
Yeah, before we get started,I've always liked to allow the
listeners and the people thatare looking and observing this
podcast to understand that todayI'm a successful businessman.
I own five businesses.
I'm very successful in a lot ofworlds.
(03:13):
And we'll get a chance,hopefully, to talk about some of
those.
But to get to that point, I hadto overcome some obstacles and
overcome really me.
You know, you can blame it onenvironmental, you can blame it
on, you know, people, howthey've treated you.
But in the end, it was a lot ofit was my self-talk and how I
looked at the world.
So to set a foundation, to setthe table for who I am today,
(03:38):
but how I got to the person I amto be an uncommon leader.
Let's start off at birth.
1962, my mother was a whiteteenage runaway.
My dad was a black pimp and drugdealer.
That's what he was.
I am the byproduct of thatquote-unquote relationship.
I was put up for adoption atbirth.
(03:59):
Biracial children were not verycommon in 1962.
In some places, it would havebeen even worse, but this was
New York at least.
And so I was put up foradoption.
And I went through, I wasn'tadopted, but I went through the
foster care system for sixyears.
At age six, I was adopted byIrene and Sam Miller.
At that point, I could not read,I could not write, I could not
(04:23):
tell time, nor could I even tiemy shoes at age six.
So I had to learn something inthat first few months.
But I was broken going into thatrelationship.
I fell in love with reading onceI was taught how to read.
And by the second grade, I wasreading at the fifth grade
level.
I was what you would callprecocious.
I was a national merit scholarat age 17.
(04:46):
I was accepted to Harvard.
I went to Dartmouth Ivy Leagueas my undergrad.
And while in Dartmouth, Iunfortunately graduated with a
major in fraternity with a minorin drinking.
That was my major.
But I did get out.
Went to my first treatmentcenter, and I can go through
this somewhat quickly.
Within two years, I relapsed offof my first opportunity of being
(05:09):
sober at age 21.
And by the time I was 23, I washomeless.
And I mean homeless on thestreets.
And I was to spend the next 20years either homeless in
treatment and halfway houses orincarcerated.
I am a three-time convictedfelon.
I've been to prison threedifferent occasions.
(05:29):
And on the last bit, I did threeyears for the drug sales of a$10
rock of crack cocaine.
But I always remember what thejudge said to me at that point
when I was being sentenced forthe third felony.
He said to me, Mr.
Miller, if you come in mycourtroom one more time, and a
felony is stealing$51 as afelony in the state of Nevada.
(05:52):
He said, I will give you thehabitual criminal statute, which
is 25 to life.
That was in 2004.
Some people say, Did you believehim?
I tell people, I still believehim.
What do you mean, did I believehim?
I still believe in him.
And then 21 years later, I justcelebrated 21 years clean and
sober on the 23rd of Septemberof this year.
So I have some time underneathmy, but there was still a lot of
(06:15):
growth.
But that gets you a just a verybasic on some of the things that
I had to overcome.
There are more, but we call itresilience.
But really what it is is thecomeback from the setback.
And I had a few setbacks alongthe way.
And you know, even when I gotout, there were some things I
still needed to work on just tobe able to do life well.
SPEAKER_00 (06:39):
I appreciate you sharing.
Uh and then again, the otherword we kind of talked about
even before we hit the recordbutton was vulnerability in
terms of sharing your story.
And yeah, overcome would be uhone of the words, resilience
would be another word, and youknow, adversity, you know.
I mean, some people faceadversity when they try to get
into school, but you've clearlyfaced a significant amount of
(07:02):
adversity uh on your way tosuccess.
Now, it might have been thatmoment uh where you heard that
and maybe you still hear thattoday, but what's been the most
difficult mindset shift for youto move from you know the
challenges that you had, and youprobably frankly uh still face
those challenges every day,personally in your mind, to
(07:24):
success?
SPEAKER_02 (07:25):
I don't face too many challenges to success.
I am successful.
I'm also well, and what I meanby that is I do life well.
There's a thing we call thevicissitudes of life.
Those are the ups and downs.
I handle them well.
I'm competent to life, but Isolve the same problems in any
other human.
I have relationship situations.
We have health issues with oldercohort.
(07:46):
There's financial things thathappen in my businesses.
I own five businesses.
So believe me, between the five,there's financial things that
come up.
But I'm competent to them, or Ihave individuals that either
work for me or contract with methat are competent and can
handle, let's say, the businesspart.
But I you you had mentionedsomething about what the judge
(08:07):
said.
What the judge said didn'treally resonate.
I remember it.
I remember it very well, butthat wasn't going to change me.
I've been threatened with a lotof things.
I've been threatened with guns,with knives, with you know,
sentences, uh, with uh theprosecutor.
So I've been threatened.
That part doesn't make changefor me, you know, because all it
(08:28):
is to me is you're threateningme with more pain.
I have a very high painthreshold.
You could not live the way Ilived as a street level addict
and alcoholic without having ahigh pain threshold.
But then again, the painthreshold is limited.
And at some point you want thepain to end, and that's when
suicide becomes a viable.
(08:49):
And I've been I've had suicideattempts, two of them years ago.
So I'm not there anymore.
But anyway, I would like to justtalk real quick about the pivot.
So I I was arrested September22nd, 2004.
And uh I went into jail.
I celebrate September 23rd, ismy sobriety date.
It's the day after I wasarrested.
October of that year, 2004, Iwas laying on my bunk, Unit 13,
(09:14):
Parr Boulevard, which is in thejail for Washoe County in
Nevada.
And God spoke to me.
God's been speaking to me often,and you can define it any way
you want to, but it's aconversation I'm having in my
head that is outside of myneeds, wants, desires that I
would say is positive.
(09:36):
And so what the conversationvery simply said is that your
journey is not going to bewithout discomfort, it's not
going to be without pain, but Iwill be there.
And together we can walk throughthis.
We can walk through this.
And ever since that day, I'vebeen cool.
I've been cool.
I've had definitely challengesand setbacks and and things, but
I've never used, I've never hurtanyone physically, I've never uh
(09:58):
threatened anyone.
Well, I could have a threat, butthat's just a threat.
But I've I've been I've been onthe journey.
The journey still consists ofdoing a lot.
But once that happened, the atleast the use of a chemical to
change my perception of realityleft me.
That what left me was the choiceand the decision.
Really, the decision.
(10:19):
The choice is always there.
It's what you decide, because adecision is a choice with action
behind it.
And what I've decided is I willnever pick up volitionally a
mind-altering chemical.
Okay, so that part's taken careof.
I go to prison, I was sentencedto six years for a$10 rock of
crack cocaine.
I went into prison, I said tomyself that if I'm the same
(10:43):
person going into prison that Iam coming out, or I'm the same
person coming out that I amgoing in, I'm gonna have the
same results.
So I had to work on thephysical, I had to work on the
intellectual, I had to work onthe emotional, and I had to work
on the spiritual.
And I work on that.
And once I did that over thenext three years, because a lot
I did three years, at least gaveme footing to deal with society
(11:06):
and the world and my exterior orexternal world.
I still had things I had to workon.
I still had to learn how to be,you know, be a businessman, how
to be a leader, how to work witha team, and then also how to
deal with some of the thingsthat I had that was baggage that
I had since I was a child.
And I worked on them.
(11:27):
And I this is my belief.
I've been good for about fouryears.
I mean, I've got to the level,and and this is real important
that I say this, John.
I've said it on a few otheroccasions.
Because I am well, I can giveout, and that's what I do.
I give out for free often.
Or if you're a client, or if youhire me to speak, but I give
out.
(11:48):
I'm not worried about alwaysworking on me.
I'm good with good.
I'm good with very good.
I don't need to be great.
I don't have the capacity to begreat.
I'm 62.
If I'm gonna be great inanything, I'm gonna be a great
grandfather to the kids.
I'm gonna be a great husband,but I don't worry about being
great in business.
I don't worry about being greaton podcasts or speaking.
(12:11):
I want to be very good so that Ican now give this gift to give
back to others.
SPEAKER_00 (12:19):
And again, you talk about that journey, even in
those three years, how do youyou had to prepare yourself
spiritually, emotionally, uh,again, as a leader inside of
that space.
You come out and you know, youprobably don't become a
successful business person rightoff the bat when you come out.
But were there disciplines thatyou learn there that you still
(12:39):
use today to be successful inyour business to help you get
through those times?
SPEAKER_02 (12:43):
100%.
There are lessons that you canlearn in the penitentiary if you
so choose that will bear wellfor you.
You can learn lessons anywhere.
You can learn them in the streeton the streets, you can learn
them in the boardroom, you canlearn them on the sporting
fields.
I learned things from sportsabout being a team player, about
being a leader on a team.
(13:05):
But I learned in prison the bestthing I learned in prison is how
to treat people with respect.
Because if you don't do it,there will be repercussions.
And so, what is respect?
So I'm writing a whole book.
It's my next book that's comingout, is on respect and
disrespect.
And it's also, and it's talkingabout respect in the
communities, whether it's theboardroom or on the streets or
(13:28):
in the family.
But what does respect mean?
What is disrespect?
And how do you increase yourrespect for others?
But anyway, respect is onething, real simple.
It's acknowledgement of aperson's position or stature
within a community.
And the community could be thecommunity of the family.
(13:49):
We have a thing called when wetalk about our elders, our G Ma
or grandmothers.
You know, my children give me,I'm talking the grandchildren,
give me respect because I'm theG PA.
Okay.
When we talk about on in on thestreets, I got respect as a drug
dealer because you need toacknowledge my position as a
drug dealer.
When I'm in the boardroom andI'm the board chair, and I've
(14:12):
been I've chaired a few boardsover the years.
You respect that.
I used to tell people, I said,go to your first board meeting
and see sit in the boardchairperson's seat.
Try that one, okay?
Because you're not respectingthat individual, usually sits at
a certain position where thatperson can take an input from
either side of the room, eitherthe side of the table, whatever.
(14:34):
But and it's also a position ofrespect because our eyes are
drawn to that individual at theend of the table as the chair.
Yeah, and there's hundreds ofexamples, but I learned that,
and then there's one lastcommunity.
We are all children of God.
That's this is my belief.
I'm not gonna go into you knowspiritual or Bible or anything
like that, but we're children ofGod.
(14:55):
There's a greater community thatI will treat you with respect
because I will acknowledge thatyou're a child of God, and
therefore I treat everyone withrespect.
SPEAKER_00 (15:05):
Can I love that?
And as you were going throughthat respect definition and that
level of authority that exists,there was a biblical picture as
you said that that came to mymind as you walked through that
and understanding that uh it'snot about necessarily just
position as well, but there'salso influence that comes into
play there and an overall, youknow, golden rule philosophy of
(15:29):
uh if we want to be treated acertain way, then we should be
respecting and treating others acertain way as well.
Thank you for sharing that.
Again, outside of that, from abiblical perspective, I
absolutely think it's there inthat we're called to respect
authority uh as individuals andrecognize that.
Now, again, in your business,the other side of what you've
talked about, the success inyour business is also
(15:51):
mentorship.
And that's become reallyimportant for you on your
journey, also, whether it's as athe director or chairman of a
board or in and it might be uhin some other space outside of
the business.
Is there a specific story thatyou have maybe in the past few
years in your mentorship?
And common leaders, hope you'reenjoying the episode so far.
(16:11):
I believe in doing business withpeople you like and trust and
not just a company name.
That's why a strong personalbrand is essential, whether
you're an entrepreneur or aleader within a company.
Brand Builders Group, the folkswho have been helping me refine
my own personal brand, areoffering a free consultation
call with one of their expertbrand strategists.
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(16:31):
your impact.
So head on over toCoachJongGallagher.com slash
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take the first step towardbuilding a personal brand that
gets you noticed for all theright reasons.
That's coachjohngallagher.comslash BBG.
Now, let's get back to theepisode.
Uh extremely, uh let's say, uhinspired by or encouraged by uh
(16:52):
the relationship that you've hadand the and the success that
you've had.
SPEAKER_02 (16:55):
Okay.
So I've been mentoring for 15years.
I mentor men of color.
I don't mentor women.
I don't mentor Caucasians.
That's my choice, my decision.
I'm comfortable with it.
And I also know that there'ssuch a need for black male
mentorship within the black malecommunity.
I've been doing it, I'vementored probably 40, 50 men.
(17:17):
I have active 12 right now.
At one point I had 28 active,but I had to call it back.
Sure.
But I just want to get to thementorship part and then tell
you the story.
So when I sit down with a man,now it's all Zoom.
I used to do them all in person,but when I sit down with a man,
the first thing I do is I say,you know, this, we're here to
talk about being mentored.
(17:37):
This is an explicitrelationship.
It is free, it is open-ended.
I've been mentoring my oldestgentleman for 15 years
regularly.
Then after we've got thefoundation built, the footing
built, I look them in the eyeand I say very simply, I have
one responsibility to you.
(17:58):
And that responsibility is toengender your dream.
What is your dream?
And I give you permission todream.
And then I shut up.
And I've had guys say 10 minutesbecause a lot of times people
have pulled away or taken fromthem the ability to dream.
So we define the dream.
So now we'll bring it up.
(18:18):
Five years ago, four or fiveyears.
Remember, I've been doing thisfor 15 years.
About four or five years ago,one of my mentees calls me up
and he said, Hey, Ken, can wemeet?
You know, over lunch orsomething like that.
And I said, Coffee usually.
I said, sure.
And uh I meet with him and hesaid it came true.
I'm like, I said, what?
He said, remember we sat downand I had this dream for this,
this, and this to happen.
(18:39):
And he began crying.
A grown black man began cryingbecause his dream became true.
It became a truth.
And he was there to thank me.
And I'm like, no, you did it.
I put certain things in placeand I supported you.
So maybe I didn't give you acouple dollars to do this or
that.
That's no big you did because Ialways wanted to always go back
(19:01):
to you.
But he's crying.
And this is a six foot two,three, 230-pound boxer that had
a dream, and that dream cametrue.
So people ask me, why do I doit?
And I have another one likethat, but that I'll just use
that one.
That's why I do it.
Because it's the right thing todo, is why I do it.
But when you get that type offeedback, you're like, why would
I even question doing this?
(19:22):
I never have questioned.
I've been doing it, like I said,15 years straight.
SPEAKER_00 (19:26):
Ken, I love that from the mentoring standpoint.
And I giving someone thepermission to dream, defining
what that dream is to them rightfrom the start.
Because once they do know whatthat dream is and that they can
articulate what that dream is,it's then, to your point, and
you said this earlier, you canthen make a choice.
Because, you know, I've oftensaid that the displeasure that
(19:46):
you will change, you will movetoward that dream when the
displeasure of remaining whereyou are is greater than the
discomfort of the change itselfthat's going to require.
Because once you've made thatdream and you've communicated
that, you've articulated that,now you've got a choice to make.
Am I going to move toward thatdream and make that happen?
And how do I know?
(20:07):
You've done that in mentoringother black men, you've done
that in your businesses as well.
How have you encouraged?
How have you developed theleaders inside of your
businesses and been able toscale?
I mean, to run five businesseswhere you've been.
What are some of those skills?
SPEAKER_02 (20:22):
So I didn't have these skills when I first
started.
So I get out of prison.
Only thing I could get was a jobpart-time in a warehouse.
Remember, I hadn't worked likelegitimately for like 20 years
and got fired from that job.
They fired all the ex-felons.
So I lost that one.
And I was fortunate enough toreturn to Anchorage, Alaska, and
(20:45):
got a white-collar job, food andbeverage supervisor for the
convention center.
And now I have a large team of20, 30.
And again, I had to learn someskill sets that I did not have,
but I'm a quick learner.
The first thing I had to learnwas, and I didn't know this, not
everybody thinks like I think.
(21:05):
Okay.
And I'm what they call a, youknow, a concrete sequential.
I'm a real bullet point person.
I'm a task-oriented person.
I'm there's nothing artsy oremotional about my quote unquote
business.
Okay.
But I thought everybody thoughtlike I did.
And I didn't know people didn'tthink like that.
But this doesn't mean that myway is right and yours is wrong.
(21:28):
We can still get to the desiredresult.
Okay.
We can still solve for theproblem.
It's just like you're going togo a different way to do it.
I'll do, you know, longarithmetic or you know, long
division, you'll do shortdivision.
We still get to the same answer.
Okay.
So that was literally one of thefirst things I had to learn.
The second thing I had to learnis that I had to treat people
(21:49):
and understand that people arehuman.
There wasn't a lot of grace whenI first became a people and
understand that people arehuman.
There wasn't a lot of grace whenI first became a people and
understand that people arehuman.
There wasn't a lot of graceleader.
Okay.
Wasn't a lot of grace.
And because that's somewhat notthe way I worked, but again,
(22:11):
it's not about me.
It's about my staff members,it's about my team leads.
It's about my contractors.
And then probably the thirdthing that I had to learn, the
third lesson, and this is inbusiness.
I mean, I have so many things Icould talk about about business
itself.
But in business with people,because in the end, it's always
(22:31):
about the people.
It's going to be your largestitem on your on your loss, your
profit and loss, your PL, yourexpenses is almost always going
to be, it's not cost of goodssold, it's going to be employees
and people.
But the other thing that I hadto learn is that I, and this is
something I learned to do, is Iwanted to grow them.
(22:54):
I wanted them, I wanted to makethem.
Maybe I took that from thementorship.
I wanted to make them what'syour dream?
I didn't really sit down and saythat with them because I'm not
mentoring.
But where do you want to go inthis field?
This isn't important.
Let me just say that.
I come from the school, you'renot going to be with me forever.
Period.
But what can I do to help yougrow in your skill set?
(23:16):
Accounting, marketing, uhfundraising, sales, whatever
your skill set that you choose,what can what conferences can I
send you to?
What coaches can I hire for you?
What can I do to make because inthe end, what I want is for you
to do whatever responsibilitiesyou have to your loved ones or
to self.
(23:36):
And that's truly the way Ithink.
And so that grace, space,learning, you know, those it
just those are just some I couldspeak on this one for a while,
but hopefully those three areKen.
SPEAKER_00 (23:48):
I love those as three principles.
And as you said, whether it'sbusiness success in the terms of
profitability or impact andthose types of things, those
three things are people relatedfor you.
I mean, not everyone thinks likeyou, right?
So giving them the space tothink, as you said, grace.
And you mentioned this.
I mean, I often talk about thata kind leader will have truth
(24:09):
and grace.
And someone who delivers truth,I mean, it can be done, but they
often will come across as abully, bully.
But some or that are onlydelivering with grace and no
truth.
Then you're too soft.
Go ahead, Ken.
SPEAKER_02 (24:20):
Yeah.
I have one more I have to do.
Yeah, absolutely.
Oh, because I loved it because Iwas given that.
You have space to fail.
You have space to fail.
I made a mistake early on when Iwent back into like the
corporate, and uh my executivedirector, I was working for a
nonprofit, called me in andsaid, This is what has happened,
dot, dot, dot.
(24:40):
But keep trying.
You've done 10 great things, andyou got this one that did not
work out.
Cost us a couple dollars, butyou brought in 50 times more,
five times more.
And I learned a lesson therebecause people who are afraid to
fail because of therepercussions or the feedback
they think they may get, they'realso afraid to do risk.
(25:03):
And many times we have to dorisk to grow or to scale the
business.
We have to.
So, all the people who work withme know, hey, if you make a
mistake, just let me know.
Let's fix it, let's move on.
What can we learn from it?
And let's move on.
SPEAKER_00 (25:17):
Yeah, space to fail, love it.
And again, it's gonna fall rightin the midst of that grace box
as well.
If you're just delivering alltruth and no grace, they're not
gonna take a risk.
They're not gonna grow, you'renot gonna be able to scale your
business.
Four phenomenal principles uhthat would help many leaders
scale their business.
Ken, I I can't believe how fastour time has gone.
I'm gonna take a couple morequestions, but I'm gonna come
(25:37):
back to your book.
Ken, and I often talk about thebook test.
Somebody reads your book andthen they put it up on a shelf,
much like the shelf behind me, alot of books that are sitting
there that I've read before.
But when they look at that booksix months later and they see
the binding of that book that'ssitting up on the shelf, what do
you want them to think?
What do you want them to feelwhen they see that, when they
(26:00):
see that book sitting there?
What do you what do you wantthem to have thought and felt
about your book?
I can do it.
SPEAKER_02 (26:06):
If he can do it, and I'm I hate to do absolutes.
My the depths of my negativethings that happen to me are
like at the 99th percentile.
Okay, three times been in situI've I've had my jaw broken
twice, my nose broken, my eyeorbital broken in fights.
I've been guns pulled on me,I've had knives to my chest,
(26:27):
I've been in the hospitalbecause of situations, three
times in prison, 20 years anaddict on the streets.
And if I can do it, you can doit.
And then do it with a smile, doit with laughter, do it with
grace, do it with tolerance, anddo it with probably the most
important word, which is love.
And so anyway, so when you seethat book, because remember the
(26:51):
title, there's a very, veryimportant reason why that title
is becoming Ken.
I'm Ken today.
I'm a kind and gentle62-year-old black male.
But before you didn't call meKen, you call me my street name
or my penitentiary name, or youcall me ex-convict, or you call
me arm robber, or you call mekidnapper.
All things I have done.
(27:12):
That's what you call me.
Or you call me drug addict orcrackhead or alcoholic.
That's what you called me.
But today, just call me Ken.
It's not Mr.
Miller, you know, whatevercertificates I have behind my
name.
It's not that.
Just call me Ken.
And that's what I became.
And uh I'm very, verycomfortable with being that.
So when you see that book andyou see becoming Ken, become the
best you because you can.
SPEAKER_00 (27:34):
Ken, that is great.
I I love that.
I I'm going to give you my lastquestion here in just a minute.
I know those who are watching onYouTube, they've got your QR
code behind you in terms ofgetting in touch with you.
Those who are just listening onaudio or others, how can they
get in touch with you, learnmore, learn more about you?
Where do you want them to go toget your book?
SPEAKER_02 (27:52):
The books on Amazon becoming Ken.
If you want to book me thisweek, or really, you can also
get in contact with me throughmy website, which is
KenMillerSpeaks.com.
Took a long time to come up withthat name.
And then I'm LinkedIn, KenMiller84 is my hand on LinkedIn.
And let me just say this (28:10):
I respond to everybody who reaches
out to me.
Everybody who reaches out to me.
I don't have any fear.
What am I supposed to do thefear?
And plus, it's not aninconvenience to me.
Thank you for reaching out.
If you got a question aboutanything we've spoken about,
reach out to me and I'llrespond.
SPEAKER_00 (28:28):
Ken, I know that you've been a gift, Ken Miller84
on LinkedIn.
I'll put the links to these inthe show notes as well so that
folks can get back to it.
I have truly enjoyed our timetoday.
I want to give you the last wordhere in one minute with regards
to a question, but I got to tellyou again, uh, folks are
listening in, there aren't manystories, as you said, that he
can take you through the laundrylist of things that he was
(28:50):
called before.
And I love one of the things yousaid, Ken, during this session,
though.
And again, we don't make thisnecessarily biblical, but as a
man of faith as well, I thinkit's very important that you are
a child of God as well, and thatKen is the name that I will call
you as well.
And I respect and honor you withwhat you've shared with us
today.
I want to throw this at you.
I'm going to give you abillboard.
(29:11):
You may have answered this alittle bit already, but I give
you a chance to maybe go alittle bit more formal.
You can put that billboardanywhere you want to.
I want you to put a message onthat billboard, though, for our
listeners and for those whowould drive by that billboard.
What's that message that youwould put on that billboard and
why do you put that message on?
SPEAKER_02 (29:28):
So many.
I've had a lot of billboards,but I'll just do one.
And what I would say, forgive.
Forgive others and forgive self.
Today.
That's what I'm saying.
And that's a that's a decisionthat's done here.
And you can make that decision.
But I would just say forgiveothers and self.
And in the lower right handcorner, I'd have today.
SPEAKER_00 (29:46):
Today.
Love that.
Ken, thank you so much for beinga guest on the Uncommon Leader
podcast.
I know that folks are going tofind value in this.
Listeners, I encourage you, goout right now before you end
this conversation and follow Kenon LinkedIn.
Get a copy of his book and checkout his website, no doubt about
it.
And if you got all the way tothis point in the conversation,
you've done really well.
(30:07):
I would encourage you to sharethis episode with someone else
that you know needs to listen tothis episode as well.
And go ahead and give it a fivestar review while you're there
because Ken uh deserves whatthat is.
And I I I know that he wants tohear from you as well.
So go connect with him.
Until next time, go and growchampions.
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