March 13, 2024 • 17 mins
Welcome to "Upgrade Your Life", a transformative podcast hosted by Dexter and Dr. Tanya, also known as the Upgraders. In this episode, the duo focusses on the common yet overlooked habit of people-pleasing and shares 10 signs to help you identify it in your own behavior. The Upgraders emphasize the importance of prioritizing your own goals, needs, and desires, underlining how often people compromise them in the name of pleasing others.
Throughout the episode, the hosts draw upon their experiences both in their personal lives and in their career paths, sharing valuable insights from various fields including leadership and communication, emotional intelligence, and mindset development. They elaborate on the implications of suppressing your desires and needs, with specific attention on how this behavior might stifle individual growth and fulfillment.
Further, they delve into the habit of avoiding conflicts and how it can often lead to unresolved issues, long-term stress, and strained relationships. The realization and acceptance of the existence of conflict, balanced with effective communication, is highlighted as a step towards healthier interpersonal dynamics and self-improvement.
Aimed at sparking a realization within the listeners about their own patterns, the goal of this episode is to encourage listeners to step out of their comfort zone and confront their people-pleasing behaviors. Join Dexter and Dr. Tanya as they emphatically exclaim, "Get out of your own way - there's so much more on the other side of you!".
***Want to grow personally and professionally in our inner circle? Join us at: http://upgradersinnercircle.com/
(The academy is designed to take your life to the next level! We will help you grow in ways your never thought possible. Start that business, create that youtube channel, start today).
Get you mind back into balance by getting your copy of "Help, My Mind is Too Loud".
Email: info@theupgraders.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
The Upgraders. Welcome to Upgrade Your Life. We're Dexter and Dr.
Tanya. You know, most people upgrade their cars, their clothes,
their cell phones, and even their homes. But what about themselves?
This is the place to help you get out of your own way.
Now let's get started.
Does your school, church, government agency, corporation, or organization need
(00:24):
leadership, communication, and team building training, then contact the Upgraders.
We specialize in soft skills training, including emotional intelligence,
influencing styles, and mindset development.
We will help you create the environment that your organization needs.
Email us at info at theupgraders.com. Again, that's info at theupgraders.com.
(00:49):
Number three, hope you guys Guys are taking notes. Suppressing your own desires and needs.
You know, that kind of tiny that goes into what I kind of opened up talking about.
What are your desires? What are your needs?
So so being married 22 years, I know you like flowers.
(01:10):
You like candles. You like relaxation.
Yep. Now, I know that. Yes. Yes. So but I see you on a daily basis,
on a weekly basis, never enjoy those things.
OK, now I can go out and buy flowers. Are you calling me out in the middle?
No, no. I'm just saying I can go out. I can go out and buy flowers.
(01:32):
But no, this is just an example, y'all. But some of it is true.
I can go out and buy the flowers, buy the candles.
We got a candle lit over there right now. Now, I can go out and do these things,
but do I actually see you enjoying them?
Sometimes you do. Sometimes you don't. I was going to say, you miss something.
You don't see it all. Yeah, I don't. So really the enjoyment of it,
(01:53):
but it's suppressing your desires and needs.
And I just make that example. Tonya, it doesn't happen all the time, but think about you.
Think about if you're a husband, think about your wife.
If you are a father or a mother, think about your children. children.
What are the things that you know that they like to do, but you don't see them doing it anymore?
And then there's some kind of, there's, you know, I believe there's some level
(02:16):
of unhappiness that we will see in our loved ones if they participate in this
behavior of suppressing their own needs and desires.
I agree with that. Yeah. Yeah. It's going to be evident. So pay attention to it. It's there. Great.
Yeah. So the implications, Consistently putting others' needs before your own
(02:38):
can lead to unmet personal goals and decreased self-esteem.
Wow.
Wow. Just let it process a little bit. Yeah, that's kind of an aha,
kind of a silent moment because that's big.
Personal goals. I want to go back to school. I want an additional,
(03:00):
like Tonya and I, we do certifications.
An additional certification that you know you want, but you put it on the back
burner. Why? Because you're pleasing somebody else.
Because their happiness is more important than yours. course
that and the fact that you may be a people pleaser is
just causing you to pay less attention to yourself and
(03:22):
your own needs and desires yeah and after a while you begin to do these types
of things over and over again that is so natural that you're again this is what
i mean when i say we oftentimes don't even realize that i'm putting these uh
standards on myself what's a better word Lord.
I'm putting these, I'm putting, I see it as I'm talking about it.
(03:45):
Yeah. I just see it's like a blockage. I'm putting this blockage.
I mean, this yoke of bondage, honestly, that I'm connecting with and I'm just
putting it on myself and keeping myself down, but it's natural.
It's something that we're used to. It's something that we're comfortable with.
You know what I mean? So this, this is what we have to do when you come to a
(04:06):
place again, a realizing it, That's when you do something about it.
Y'all know my tagline, exposure brings closure.
When I begin to expose the fact that these were the things that I was dealing
with when I came to understand it better within myself, that's when I was able to bring closure to it.
That's when you're able to do something about it. And it'll be the same for you.
That's good. That's good. So guys, so we're going to hop to number four.
(04:28):
Number four is avoiding conflict at all costs.
This is a big one. Now, I'll tell you, I did the...
Tanya and I, we teach influence and styles. We're soft skills trainers and we
teach mindset development training, those kinds of things.
And we both went through these assessments.
I remember going through an assessment in 2007.
(04:53):
I think it was 2007. And it was interesting.
The facilitator had all of us to get up where we were sitting and he had a scale
on this side of the room to that side of the room. On this side of the room was conflict.
You will face conflict. On this side of the room was you avoid conflict.
(05:15):
And he said, OK, go stand on the line of where you assess yourself.
And it was interesting. I went on the side of avoiding conflict.
And then I looked at my co-workers. Some were they were OK with conflict.
But we were all across that spectrum. And it was amazing to me.
(05:36):
I got an idea of kind of who I am and that I do avoid conflict at all costs.
I try to avoid any type of disturbance in relationships.
And that I identified on that day that I have a degree of a unhealthy balance with people pleasing.
(05:59):
It was unhealthy because as a leader, what interesting as a leader,
you have to deal with conflict. So fast forward, that was 2007.
Fast forward to 2000, maybe 12. I was hiring area directors in my area for a job.
(06:19):
And there was one gentleman that I liked, but his attitude was absolute crap.
I mean, he had a horrible attitude and I didn't like the way he treated other people. Right.
So I selected another area director over him. OK, but it was my I had to have
that conversation with him and I had a bit of trepidation with that.
(06:40):
I did. I did. I was like, man, how am I going to say so? I didn't want to stir up the conflict.
And I'm telling you, once we realize that we have these kinds of challenges,
we got to face them head on. Because it's as you face it, it steps you up in
your personal goals, which is what we just covered and your development,
your personal development.
(07:01):
That's big, right? Yeah. Yeah. It does. It's really big. It is.
And I'm looking even at the implication.
Avoiding necessary confrontations can result in unresolved issues leading to
long-term stress and strained relationships. Right.
And that's what it would do. Wow. That's what it would do.
(07:23):
Avoidance never helps anything. You know, not when it comes down to relationships.
Yeah. Not when it comes down to relationships. We're going to have to address some things.
You know, I love you know, I will always talk about a shared pool of meaning.
You know, we both may be coming with two different perspectives about a particular issue.
But I guarantee you, for the most part, in most conflict, everyone wants some of the same things.
(07:50):
We just got to figure out how we're going to get there together.
And it requires conversation.
And when you are a people pleaser, a lot of times you may think or feel like
your opinion doesn't matter, but it does.
Yeah, that's very true. Yeah. That's a big statement. As a leader here in one
of the industries that we are that we're actually successful in,
(08:10):
I can remember one of our leaders even saying to me to tell me they were like,
we need you because I would always feel like an eyeball.
Ball, you know, and I would think like, I don't think like everybody else thinks,
you know, I think more about the people and I'm really thinking from this perspective
and all that kind of stuff.
And, you know, they may be looking at things differently and they were like,
(08:33):
we need to hear from you because I was like, let me just be quiet.
That's avoidance. You see, I was like, let me just be quiet.
Let me not give my opinion. You guys talk and whatever you say and decide,
that's what I'm going to do.
But that's really not a healthy thing to do. It's very unhealthy.
Healthy and also what it would mean for me is
see if you can relate are you the type of person as
(08:54):
well where you know you don't does it make you
feel like that you've done that you're not good enough or that you've done something
wrong if the decision being made doesn't line up with what it is that you desire
that's the thing too that you have to work out within yourself because a lot
lot of times when those of us who are dealing with people, please,
(09:16):
and we're perfectionists and to feel like someone is saying that's not going to work.
You could pretty much internalize that process that and think of it as if,
wow, something's wrong with me.
It is so much conversation that could go on in your mind that will really be
a stifling for you, a stumbling block for you, but it stifles you.
(09:41):
I mean, you will not move. And it's just really necessary to understand that
it's okay to have conflict.
It's okay to have a difference of opinion. It's just a matter of communicating
it in a healthy and effective way.
I know you've heard the comment before, you know, how does it go?
(10:01):
They say we agree to disagree.
Yeah. And that's what it is. And everything is still okay.
It's still okay. And you move on. Yeah. And get into alignment.
And that's what you have to do. Yeah, it's such a it's such a very deep conversation
because, you know, and I'll tell you, Tonya mentioned one of the industries
(10:25):
that we're in is direct sales and what's interesting about it.
I'm telling you, we said this like 12 years ago.
Direct sales is personal development on steroids. It really is.
I mean, you learn that industry and not develop.
You learn who you are. You learn your leadership. You're serious about it.
Your good leadership, your bad leadership. I'm talking about with you.
(10:47):
You learn how you assess situations, how you handle situations,
how to talk to this person is different than that person, different than that
person, different than all of the people combined.
You have to do so many things. And it makes me think like while you were talking,
I thought about even the workplace, the jobs that we've had,
corporate and municipal government, city, state government, all those kinds of things.
(11:12):
And I think about I can think about times in the office where people were just
so angry with each other because of the lack of communication.
The lack of communication is so important, avoiding conflict. It is so important.
(11:58):
You guys, we've learned so much about ourselves. Adults don't have it all together.
As much as we like to think we have more conflict than sometimes middle school
children, the conflict is very real.
So, so, so, so question Tanya. So if, so if a coworker in that situation,
(12:20):
if you're in your office and then somebody comes in your office and says,
says, Tanya, I need you to do X, Y, Z for me, right?
And you turn around and say, well, I'm not able to do that for you right now
because I'm working on something else.
And that coworker storms out of your office.
See, how do you deal with something like that? Do you go to that person later
(12:42):
after they've calmed down and say, hey, listen, I didn't.
I prefer that you don't come come into office that way. I'll be glad to help you.
But not under those circumstances. I mean, you see what I'm saying?
It's such fine needle to thread there. It really is.
And I can't even say, Dexter, that there is a right and wrong way to do it.
Yeah. I can't even say that.
(13:04):
Well, this is what you should do because. And this is something I would say often.
I would talk often about how I may be in a healthier place than you.
You may be in a healthier place than me emotionally.
You know, even just in our thinking, you know, if you understand what I mean.
So I may have to be the one to step into that place of authority,
(13:28):
quote unquote, because I understand better.
That's a part of personal development. If I'm interacting with someone who clearly
is not on the level that I am as it pertains to how I handle situations.
Conflict, conflict resolution, but I understand what needs to happen here,
then I just need to kind of step into that role.
And that doesn't mean let me tell you about yourself.
(13:50):
That means I may be the one that just not now.
Let me be quiet kind of thing. So I don't know that I could exactly say what's
the best way or what you would do.
I think you would kind of have to know and play it by ear. Now,
here's the thing that I want everybody to understand, Dexter,
from what you just shared.
And this kind of comes into things that we've talked about even recently pertaining
(14:11):
to me, where it's a matter of I had to get comfortable.
You need to be comfortable with doing what's best for you.
There are times that there
are times that you know i may give
in i may go ahead and say yeah i'll handle that for
(14:32):
you because i can i want to it's not
going to interfere with anything else that i have going on but
if i know i can't right now if i know this isn't the best time for me if i know
that i've been doing this type of type of thing for you over and over again
and you You continue to come in this to come to come to this situation or to
(14:53):
be in this particular predicament.
And I'm like, I'm not going to continue to support that. That's a decision I
need to make. And I have to be comfortable with it.
I see that's for a people pleaser. That's very good for a people pleaser.
That's a challenge, you know, because you're constantly trying to make everybody
else happy and want everyone else to be OK.
So I say again to what you just stated, my thing would be whatever decision you make.
(15:20):
Be comfortable with it. Whatever decision you make, be okay.
Whether you say, I'm going to help, or you say, I can't right now.
And if they storm off, I love the sign on the door now. That was really good.
Yeah, it was cool. I mean, that was a nice one.
It went up a day later. A silent speaking, if you will.
But at the same time, we're not trying to start no mess up in the office.
(15:43):
But I understand exactly what they were saying in that. But,
you know, so that's what you do.
Yeah, that's what you do. Y'all, this is this. This has been good. Look, that's four.
So we've covered four out of 10 signs that you are a people pleaser and the
implications of being one.
So we hope you've gotten a lot of information out of. I don't know.
We may come back and share a few more in a later episode.
(16:06):
I have no idea, but we'll see, because I think this has been really good.
Absolutely. We hope that you guys got a lot, a lot out of this,
because I know that we did.
And even when we were putting this together, our research and then the certification
that we're working on is we want to help people because Tanya mentioned at the
beginning, our tagline is not our tagline, but we say, get out of your own way.
(16:28):
We want you to get out of your own way because there's so much more on the other side of you.
I just made that up. There's so much more on the other side of you.
So you got to get out of your own way. All right.
Anything else, Tanya? Are we good? No, I think we're good. All right,
so listen, guys, we're Dexter and Dr.
Tanya, and our tagline is, we may not know you. But we know what's in you.
(16:50):
We'll see you on the next broadcast.
Music.
The Upgraders. Welcome to Upgrade Your Life. We're Dexter and Dr.
Tanya. You know, most people upgrade their cars, their clothes,
their cell phones, and even their homes. But what about themselves?
This is the place to help you get out of your own way.
Now let's get started.
Does your school, church, government agency, corporation, or organization need
(00:24):
leadership, communication, and team building training, then contact the Upgraders.
We specialize in soft skills training, including emotional intelligence,
influencing styles, and mindset development.
We will help you create the environment that your organization needs.
Email us at info at theupgraders.com. Again, that's info at theupgraders.com.
(00:49):
Number three, hope you guys Guys are taking notes. Suppressing your own desires and needs.
You know, that kind of tiny that goes into what I kind of opened up talking about.
What are your desires? What are your needs?
So so being married 22 years, I know you like flowers.
(01:10):
You like candles. You like relaxation.
Yep. Now, I know that. Yes. Yes. So but I see you on a daily basis,
on a weekly basis, never enjoy those things.
OK, now I can go out and buy flowers. Are you calling me out in the middle?
No, no. I'm just saying I can go out. I can go out and buy flowers.
(01:32):
But no, this is just an example, y'all. But some of it is true.
I can go out and buy the flowers, buy the candles.
We got a candle lit over there right now. Now, I can go out and do these things,
but do I actually see you enjoying them?
Sometimes you do. Sometimes you don't. I was going to say, you miss something.
You don't see it all. Yeah, I don't. So really the enjoyment of it,
(01:53):
but it's suppressing your desires and needs.
And I just make that example. Tonya, it doesn't happen all the time, but think about you.
Think about if you're a husband, think about your wife.
If you are a father or a mother, think about your children. children.
What are the things that you know that they like to do, but you don't see them doing it anymore?
And then there's some kind of, there's, you know, I believe there's some level
(02:16):
of unhappiness that we will see in our loved ones if they participate in this
behavior of suppressing their own needs and desires.
I agree with that. Yeah. Yeah. It's going to be evident. So pay attention to it. It's there. Great.
Yeah. So the implications, Consistently putting others' needs before your own
(02:38):
can lead to unmet personal goals and decreased self-esteem.
Wow.
Wow. Just let it process a little bit. Yeah, that's kind of an aha,
kind of a silent moment because that's big.
Personal goals. I want to go back to school. I want an additional,
(03:00):
like Tonya and I, we do certifications.
An additional certification that you know you want, but you put it on the back
burner. Why? Because you're pleasing somebody else.
Because their happiness is more important than yours. course
that and the fact that you may be a people pleaser is
just causing you to pay less attention to yourself and
(03:22):
your own needs and desires yeah and after a while you begin to do these types
of things over and over again that is so natural that you're again this is what
i mean when i say we oftentimes don't even realize that i'm putting these uh
standards on myself what's a better word Lord.
I'm putting these, I'm putting, I see it as I'm talking about it.
(03:45):
Yeah. I just see it's like a blockage. I'm putting this blockage.
I mean, this yoke of bondage, honestly, that I'm connecting with and I'm just
putting it on myself and keeping myself down, but it's natural.
It's something that we're used to. It's something that we're comfortable with.
You know what I mean? So this, this is what we have to do when you come to a
(04:06):
place again, a realizing it, That's when you do something about it.
Y'all know my tagline, exposure brings closure.
When I begin to expose the fact that these were the things that I was dealing
with when I came to understand it better within myself, that's when I was able to bring closure to it.
That's when you're able to do something about it. And it'll be the same for you.
That's good. That's good. So guys, so we're going to hop to number four.
(04:28):
Number four is avoiding conflict at all costs.
This is a big one. Now, I'll tell you, I did the...
Tanya and I, we teach influence and styles. We're soft skills trainers and we
teach mindset development training, those kinds of things.
And we both went through these assessments.
I remember going through an assessment in 2007.
(04:53):
I think it was 2007. And it was interesting.
The facilitator had all of us to get up where we were sitting and he had a scale
on this side of the room to that side of the room. On this side of the room was conflict.
You will face conflict. On this side of the room was you avoid conflict.
(05:15):
And he said, OK, go stand on the line of where you assess yourself.
And it was interesting. I went on the side of avoiding conflict.
And then I looked at my co-workers. Some were they were OK with conflict.
But we were all across that spectrum. And it was amazing to me.
(05:36):
I got an idea of kind of who I am and that I do avoid conflict at all costs.
I try to avoid any type of disturbance in relationships.
And that I identified on that day that I have a degree of a unhealthy balance with people pleasing.
(05:59):
It was unhealthy because as a leader, what interesting as a leader,
you have to deal with conflict. So fast forward, that was 2007.
Fast forward to 2000, maybe 12. I was hiring area directors in my area for a job.
(06:19):
And there was one gentleman that I liked, but his attitude was absolute crap.
I mean, he had a horrible attitude and I didn't like the way he treated other people. Right.
So I selected another area director over him. OK, but it was my I had to have
that conversation with him and I had a bit of trepidation with that.
(06:40):
I did. I did. I was like, man, how am I going to say so? I didn't want to stir up the conflict.
And I'm telling you, once we realize that we have these kinds of challenges,
we got to face them head on. Because it's as you face it, it steps you up in
your personal goals, which is what we just covered and your development,
your personal development.
(07:01):
That's big, right? Yeah. Yeah. It does. It's really big. It is.
And I'm looking even at the implication.
Avoiding necessary confrontations can result in unresolved issues leading to
long-term stress and strained relationships. Right.
And that's what it would do. Wow. That's what it would do.
(07:23):
Avoidance never helps anything. You know, not when it comes down to relationships.
Yeah. Not when it comes down to relationships. We're going to have to address some things.
You know, I love you know, I will always talk about a shared pool of meaning.
You know, we both may be coming with two different perspectives about a particular issue.
But I guarantee you, for the most part, in most conflict, everyone wants some of the same things.
(07:50):
We just got to figure out how we're going to get there together.
And it requires conversation.
And when you are a people pleaser, a lot of times you may think or feel like
your opinion doesn't matter, but it does.
Yeah, that's very true. Yeah. That's a big statement. As a leader here in one
of the industries that we are that we're actually successful in,
(08:10):
I can remember one of our leaders even saying to me to tell me they were like,
we need you because I would always feel like an eyeball.
Ball, you know, and I would think like, I don't think like everybody else thinks,
you know, I think more about the people and I'm really thinking from this perspective
and all that kind of stuff.
And, you know, they may be looking at things differently and they were like,
(08:33):
we need to hear from you because I was like, let me just be quiet.
That's avoidance. You see, I was like, let me just be quiet.
Let me not give my opinion. You guys talk and whatever you say and decide,
that's what I'm going to do.
But that's really not a healthy thing to do. It's very unhealthy.
Healthy and also what it would mean for me is
see if you can relate are you the type of person as
(08:54):
well where you know you don't does it make you
feel like that you've done that you're not good enough or that you've done something
wrong if the decision being made doesn't line up with what it is that you desire
that's the thing too that you have to work out within yourself because a lot
lot of times when those of us who are dealing with people, please,
(09:16):
and we're perfectionists and to feel like someone is saying that's not going to work.
You could pretty much internalize that process that and think of it as if,
wow, something's wrong with me.
It is so much conversation that could go on in your mind that will really be
a stifling for you, a stumbling block for you, but it stifles you.
(09:41):
I mean, you will not move. And it's just really necessary to understand that
it's okay to have conflict.
It's okay to have a difference of opinion. It's just a matter of communicating
it in a healthy and effective way.
I know you've heard the comment before, you know, how does it go?
(10:01):
They say we agree to disagree.
Yeah. And that's what it is. And everything is still okay.
It's still okay. And you move on. Yeah. And get into alignment.
And that's what you have to do. Yeah, it's such a it's such a very deep conversation
because, you know, and I'll tell you, Tonya mentioned one of the industries
(10:25):
that we're in is direct sales and what's interesting about it.
I'm telling you, we said this like 12 years ago.
Direct sales is personal development on steroids. It really is.
I mean, you learn that industry and not develop.
You learn who you are. You learn your leadership. You're serious about it.
Your good leadership, your bad leadership. I'm talking about with you.
(10:47):
You learn how you assess situations, how you handle situations,
how to talk to this person is different than that person, different than that
person, different than all of the people combined.
You have to do so many things. And it makes me think like while you were talking,
I thought about even the workplace, the jobs that we've had,
corporate and municipal government, city, state government, all those kinds of things.
(11:12):
And I think about I can think about times in the office where people were just
so angry with each other because of the lack of communication.
The lack of communication is so important, avoiding conflict. It is so important.
(11:58):
You guys, we've learned so much about ourselves. Adults don't have it all together.
As much as we like to think we have more conflict than sometimes middle school
children, the conflict is very real.
So, so, so, so question Tanya. So if, so if a coworker in that situation,
(12:20):
if you're in your office and then somebody comes in your office and says,
says, Tanya, I need you to do X, Y, Z for me, right?
And you turn around and say, well, I'm not able to do that for you right now
because I'm working on something else.
And that coworker storms out of your office.
See, how do you deal with something like that? Do you go to that person later
(12:42):
after they've calmed down and say, hey, listen, I didn't.
I prefer that you don't come come into office that way. I'll be glad to help you.
But not under those circumstances. I mean, you see what I'm saying?
It's such fine needle to thread there. It really is.
And I can't even say, Dexter, that there is a right and wrong way to do it.
Yeah. I can't even say that.
(13:04):
Well, this is what you should do because. And this is something I would say often.
I would talk often about how I may be in a healthier place than you.
You may be in a healthier place than me emotionally.
You know, even just in our thinking, you know, if you understand what I mean.
So I may have to be the one to step into that place of authority,
(13:28):
quote unquote, because I understand better.
That's a part of personal development. If I'm interacting with someone who clearly
is not on the level that I am as it pertains to how I handle situations.
Conflict, conflict resolution, but I understand what needs to happen here,
then I just need to kind of step into that role.
And that doesn't mean let me tell you about yourself.
(13:50):
That means I may be the one that just not now.
Let me be quiet kind of thing. So I don't know that I could exactly say what's
the best way or what you would do.
I think you would kind of have to know and play it by ear. Now,
here's the thing that I want everybody to understand, Dexter,
from what you just shared.
And this kind of comes into things that we've talked about even recently pertaining
(14:11):
to me, where it's a matter of I had to get comfortable.
You need to be comfortable with doing what's best for you.
There are times that there
are times that you know i may give
in i may go ahead and say yeah i'll handle that for
(14:32):
you because i can i want to it's not
going to interfere with anything else that i have going on but
if i know i can't right now if i know this isn't the best time for me if i know
that i've been doing this type of type of thing for you over and over again
and you You continue to come in this to come to come to this situation or to
(14:53):
be in this particular predicament.
And I'm like, I'm not going to continue to support that. That's a decision I
need to make. And I have to be comfortable with it.
I see that's for a people pleaser. That's very good for a people pleaser.
That's a challenge, you know, because you're constantly trying to make everybody
else happy and want everyone else to be OK.
So I say again to what you just stated, my thing would be whatever decision you make.
(15:20):
Be comfortable with it. Whatever decision you make, be okay.
Whether you say, I'm going to help, or you say, I can't right now.
And if they storm off, I love the sign on the door now. That was really good.
Yeah, it was cool. I mean, that was a nice one.
It went up a day later. A silent speaking, if you will.
But at the same time, we're not trying to start no mess up in the office.
(15:43):
But I understand exactly what they were saying in that. But,
you know, so that's what you do.
Yeah, that's what you do. Y'all, this is this. This has been good. Look, that's four.
So we've covered four out of 10 signs that you are a people pleaser and the
implications of being one.
So we hope you've gotten a lot of information out of. I don't know.
We may come back and share a few more in a later episode.
(16:06):
I have no idea, but we'll see, because I think this has been really good.
Absolutely. We hope that you guys got a lot, a lot out of this,
because I know that we did.
And even when we were putting this together, our research and then the certification
that we're working on is we want to help people because Tanya mentioned at the
beginning, our tagline is not our tagline, but we say, get out of your own way.
(16:28):
We want you to get out of your own way because there's so much more on the other side of you.
I just made that up. There's so much more on the other side of you.
So you got to get out of your own way. All right.
Anything else, Tanya? Are we good? No, I think we're good. All right,
so listen, guys, we're Dexter and Dr.
Tanya, and our tagline is, we may not know you. But we know what's in you.
(16:50):
We'll see you on the next broadcast.
Music.
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