Whitney and Scott share their remarkable journey from devout Mormonism to embracing cuckolding and kink. Their story reveals how open communication and mutual respect enabled them to discover and explore their true sexual desires despite starting from an extremely conservative religious background.
• Left the Mormon church together after 10 years of marriage, beginning their exploration of non-monogamy
• Accidentally attended their first swingers club
• Discovered Whitney enjoyed sex with others while Scott preferred watching
• Explored BDSM when Scott expressed interest in femdom, initially met with resistance
• Had a transformative experience when Whitney watched a man dominate Scott at a BDSM party
• Gradually developed their own style of cuckolding that incorporates elements of femdom
• Scott processes emotional challenges through extensive communication with Whitney
• The couple emphasizes that cuckolding enhances rather than replaces their fulfilling sex life together
• Now carefully select play partners who match their personalities and desires
• Share that a successful cuckolding relationship requires emotional work but offers tremendous rewards
Links:
Whitney and Scott's FL profile: LuckyMan82
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
So here's what's coming up on the show.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
We went to a party and it was a BDSM party and
there was this guy and he lovedthat this was our first time at
a BDSM event.
And he was like, do you want meto top your husband and show
you what it's like?
And I was like, yes, I wouldlove that.
And it was amazing.
Scott crumbled under his whipand I saw the pleasure it gave
(00:34):
him and I was all in.
I was like, yep, I'll do this,because when it comes to the
pleasure of my partner obviouslymy pleasure too, but the
pleasure of my partner as well Iam all in.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
This is the Venus Cuckoldress Podcast, a place to
learn all things cuckolding Forthe curious, for the passionate
and for the sexually empoweredwoman who wants it all.
Let's go.
(01:21):
Welcome to the show.
I'm your host, venus.
I have such a great episode foryou today.
Let's go.
And then now they're a verykinky cuckolding couple.
(01:44):
This story feels really specialto me because I really feel
like it showcases how, if youhave a curious approach and an
open mind, it really helpscouples to understand each other
and their deepest desires andbe really compatible when it
(02:05):
comes to those kinds of things.
Whitney and Scott have alsoshared their FetLife profile, so
if you would like to check itout, you can find that
information in the show notesfor today's episode.
Right now I am doing a longdistance move and for all of you
who've done a move before, youknow how much it fucking sucks.
So I'm up to my eyeballs andboxes and shit, so it's a bit of
(02:26):
a crazy time for me.
I'm not doing a lot of the livechats in the Queens Quarters
community right now, but I willbe doing that as soon as I get
everything all set up in my newlocation, so you can look
forward to seeing some more livechats happening in the Queens
Quarters community next monthand you can always find all the
(02:47):
details for that informationabout the days, the times and
all that stuff and they are freechats as well in the events
page on venuscuckoldresscom.
Again, you can find theinformation for that in the show
notes for today's episode.
All right, that's it forannouncements.
Let's jump into the show rightafter this quick message from
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(04:15):
Joining me on the show?
I have Whitney and Scott comingto share their really
interesting story about how theyevolved into a cuckolding
relationship.
I'm looking forward to this one.
Welcome to the show.
You guys Say hello to all thelisteners.
Hi everybody.
Speaker 3 (04:34):
This is Whitney.
This is Scott.
Thanks for having us on Venus.
Speaker 1 (04:37):
Yeah, thanks for coming.
Okay, so when I first learnedI've learned a little bit about
your story and I was just likefucking fascinated, because I
don't hear this very often whereyou guys are.
You were a couple, you were in,like you were devout, what's
called devout Mormons right, I'mnot religious.
(04:58):
I've never been religious, so Idon't really know anything
about religions but like.
I'm pretty sure that that'slike very conservative right,
Correct?
Speaker 3 (05:09):
It is.
It's like you've got like whatwould be like the, the like woke
liberal Christians would belike the Protestants and like
the crazy, crazy fundamentalistswould be like Jehovah's
witnesses.
We're like.
We're like a, an inch or twoover from the Jehovah's
Witnesses if these are namesthat mean anything to you as a
non-religious person.
(05:29):
So it's not like the supercultish level of religion, but
it is a very, very conservativereligion.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
Wow, okay, I've heard of it in the past.
I've talked to some people inthe past where, like, the wife
came from a very religiousbackground and so she struggled
with you know, when he broughtup cuckolding she struggled with
it.
So I've heard of that, but Ihaven't really it where, like,
(06:02):
both people come from a very,very religious conservative
background and then kind ofexplore this together.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
I don't I'm I've so many questions for you, so I'm
so excited to talk about thiswe're excited to talk about it
we joke that we won the lotterybecause we met and married
within 10 months and then, 10years later, left the church
together at the same time andstayed married, and now we're
happily living this lifestyle.
This just blows my mind likethis yeah, we celebrate 20 years
(06:34):
this month.
Speaker 1 (06:36):
It is like you guys won the lottery the fact that
you guys, you know, started outthat way and and very
conservative, and then decidedto start questioning your faith.
Was it one of you that broughtit up and was like I don't know
about this.
Should we keep going down thisroad?
Speaker 3 (06:53):
Yeah, I mean, it's the cliche in this lifestyle,
right, as the husband alwaysbrings up the cuckolding to the
wife.
Differently from the kinkaspect, it was definitely me
that brought up the faithaspects and had struggled for a
while, probably for a couple ofyears.
At the point I finally saidsomething.
Part of the problem and thoselisteners that come from
(07:14):
conservative religions probablyknow this that it's pretty rare
for a couple that meets in aculture like that and leaves
faith behind to stay together.
That's usually faith is likethe anchoring glue right and
once that's gone people realizelike holy shit, we're like
totally different people.
I'm not even sure I like you andso you know, I mean, there was
(07:36):
like a real struggle with evenopening up about, you know,
difficulties with faith, withthis sort of recognition that
like this could really sendthings off the rails.
Right, there's a calculus oflike do I choke it down, shut up
and spend the rest of my life,mormon, you know, even if I'm
not believing?
Or do I rock the boat?
Because if I rock the boat Icould be ending my marriage.
(07:58):
Yeah, and that was sort of thedecision you had to walk into it
with.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
And majority of people we know that have
transitioned out of Mormonism.
There's very, very few thatremained married.
Speaker 2 (08:16):
I mean we're, we're a small number, Wow.
So, whitney, were you kind oflike shocked by this, or?
Yeah for sure I was shocked andhorrified, luckily for him, you
know I joke like if you hearour our story of how we met and
married like we were already afemale led relationship during
our courtship as well, and so Iknew what I wanted when I chose
(08:36):
him to marry.
And then he he was a verysubmissive and loving and kind
those first 10 years of marriage.
So when he brought this up, Iwas like no, I'm all in on this
marriage still, and I hatehypocrisy and lying so much that
as soon as we started lookinginto the church it crumbled very
fast and I did not blame him atall.
Speaker 1 (08:58):
Oh, wow, yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:01):
Dodged a bullet.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
Oh, I love this.
I have a female-ledrelationship.
I'm not giving up this man.
Speaker 2 (09:09):
Well, we didn't know that, Right right right, we
didn't have that language at thetime.
But we look back and we're like, oh, we've always been this way
, even as Mormons.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
We have a good friend that pointed this out a few
years ago that we're close withand could be open about the
lifestyle with, and she put itreally like I've never forgotten
it because I thought it was sogreat is she described it as we
had been living this lifestylebefore we had the vocabulary to
describe the lifestyle we wereliving.
And as we looked back, we'relike, oh man, yeah, like, take
(09:39):
the like sex kink out of it.
I mean we from the day we met,really our first date was
basically her telling me youshould ask me out it.
I mean we from the day we metreally our first date was
basically her telling me youshould ask me out Right.
I mean, just from from the getgo.
It was a very like turned onits head and in retrospect it
was like oh yeah, we've been ina female led relationship for 20
years.
We just didn't know that's whatit was until I don't know seven
(09:59):
years ago or something likethat.
Um, so yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:02):
Wow Okay, wow okay.
So you, you guys, decided toditch the mormon thing the
church.
Yeah, sorry, I'm so notreligious I'm like the thing you
know the world, like I don'tknow the, the church stuff, like
, yeah, sorry my ignorance.
Um, so you decided to move pastthat together.
(10:23):
And then what was it like afterthat?
How did you start talk, havingdiscussions around?
Well, more discussions aroundsexy stuff, kinky stuff,
fantasies.
Speaker 2 (10:36):
We've always been really sexual.
If we had to live apart fromeach other, like for school
reasons or internships, we wouldwrite really sexy emails.
Or maybe we couldn't masturbatebecause that wasn't allowed,
but we would sort of have phonesex without touching ourselves.
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (10:55):
So it was about as hot as it sounds.
Speaker 2 (10:57):
Hey, I was turned on.
We just couldn't finish.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
You can't masturbate.
So what do you do?
Like, hump a pillow, like Idon't know, like what do you do?
Speaker 2 (11:06):
You just masturbate, like what no.
Speaker 3 (11:10):
You cock block yourself repeatedly yeah, oh,
wow.
But yeah, this was even asdevout Mormons, you definitely
(11:35):
can't do that, but it soundedhot, so we're talking about it
anyway.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
So we are people showed up in our fantasies.
Speaker 3 (11:41):
Definitely not allowed up in our fantasies,
definitely not allowed.
So we already kind of had thislike banter of fun.
Um of you know thesepossibilities and there were a
handful of times where, like, wewere daring enough to be like
okay, like you know, if youcould do like anything and like
the religious rules didn'tmatter.
(12:03):
And I remember being flooredthis was years before we left
the church Like what would youdo?
And and uh, my wife Whitney,she's like, oh, I would probably
have a one night stand withsomeone and I was like I'm sorry
, you know what Sounded like thebest thing ever to me.
Um, so yeah, it was one of thosethings.
When we left the church, we westarted just kind of exploring
(12:25):
ourselves.
A couple of months later, wewatched porn together for the
first time.
We'd never watched porn.
That's highly frowned on in theMormon religion and that sort
of spawned this conversation oflike hey, you know some of those
fun things we used to fantasizeor talk about.
Uh, you know, like, if wereally don't believe and aren't
like handcuffed by this wholeMormon thing, like there's no.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
What if you know?
Speaker 3 (12:47):
like we could actually do that.
I mean, that's kind of how itstarted.
It was, I don't know four orfive months later, before we
like tiptoed into a club orsomething.
But again, like we didn't know,like we didn't even know what
the word cuckold was at thispoint, was, at this point, still
right.
This was like the edgiest weknew is like there are these
really seedy, disgusting peoplethat are married but have sex
(13:08):
with people they're not marriedto right Like that was like the
extent of our knowledge of this,like whole world out there, but
it sounded hot right so likewell, we could actually look at
that.
Is there anything around wherewe live?
So that's kind of how itstarted.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
And honestly, we accidentally, we made a profile
on one of the websites andaccidentally said yes, we're
coming.
And then, you know, we were onReddit, of course, trying to
learn everything we could abouthow to do this, and it said once
you RSVP, if you don't show,you're very rude.
And we didn't want to be rude,so we went to the club the first
time.
(13:43):
Oh wow, rude.
So we went to the club thefirst time, that's right.
Speaker 1 (13:49):
Oh wow, I was like, well, I mean, if we are svp you
have to.
Yeah, well, okay, so you, youkind of got pushed and not
pushed into it, but you kind ofgot obligated to go me oh yeah,
yeah, both of us to the club,yeah I mean you could, you could
put it that way.
Speaker 3 (14:00):
I mean I were excited , like at the end of the day we
could have on RSVP to not gone.
So it was one of those like youknow how sometimes you just
need like the very, very minor,like yeah, go for it, and you're
like, oh, okay, like fine, Ithink that's really what it was.
Was this just like that?
That last little mental hurdlethat just became so much easier
because we got the like emailfrom the group that was hosting,
(14:22):
like we're so excited to hostyou and we had read all the
stuff in the forums and you know, uh, the like swinger subreddit
that it's like poor etiquetteto rsvp and not go.
So it was like that last littleyeah, that last little push of
like okay, let's just go checkit out.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Yeah so how do you go from I still can't get over the
fact that you're not allowed tomasturbate like I'm like what?
Oh my god.
Um, how do you go from notbeing able to masturbate or
watch porn to going to aswingers club like were you
fucking terrified or what?
Speaker 2 (14:56):
we were nervous.
I think we're reallyadventurous people in our life
and and then it, you know,transitioned into our lifestyle
life too.
I'm also I'm extremelyextroverted and love adventures
probably even more so than him.
So it just felt like thisawesome adventure and I think we
(15:17):
were in a very open mindset,exploratory moment in our life,
exploratory moment in our life,and so it was just this fun
thing for me at least.
I turn nervous, scared energyinto excited positivity, usually
Wow.
Speaker 3 (15:34):
Yeah, it's almost weird.
It's hard to explain,especially if you haven't been
religious.
I'm sure lots of listeners whohave left conservative religions
will will understand.
But there's this, there's thissort of period of like
rediscovering yourself sounds solike cliche and silly.
(15:54):
I'm like struggling with theright words.
But there's this, this period oflike really taking a massive
step back and, like most of us,you just kind of like you grow
up in life and you're taughtwhat you're taught by your
parents and those are the moralsyou inherit and you may like
dabble on the margins of like oh, my parents said don't drink
alcohol, but I like drinkingalcohol or whatever Most people
(16:15):
don't like really do that likedeep, deep thinking of like well
, what is it that I actuallyfundamentally believe?
And when you leave a religionlike that, you're kind of forced
to take this massive step backand just throw everything out
and start over again in a waythat I think a lot of people
that again, even if, like on themargins, they move something,
(16:38):
you know they change theirmorals a little bit from how
they're grown up.
I mean, we really just had totake this giant step back and
down to literally what are wedoing with our lives type of
purpose discussions, that allwent out the window.
We had a very clear path andbook written all about what this
(16:58):
life is for.
That all of a sudden, we didn'thave anymore, and so I think
that just kind of made us,together with our personalities,
really open to like what's theworst that could happen.
We go to this club and realizelike everyone really is a demon
with a tail growing out of it,and we just never go back Like,
okay, let's go check it out, youknow?
Um, so yeah, it's just kind ofhow it worked for us to to be
(17:21):
like and we've taken this allthroughout the lifestyle that
like people ask about well, haveyou really had bad experiences?
And like they've had someexperiences we wouldn't repeat.
But by and large, we're justthe types of people that are
like, well, that was a fuckingexperience.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
Yeah, like move on yeah.
So, yeah, definitely approachedit from a learning perspective
and a will.
I like this.
We didn't have a lot of rulesgoing into everything.
We just always made sure thatwe would talk about it
afterwards and then maybe newrules would come up.
But to this day we don't have aton of rules.
Speaker 3 (17:58):
I can't, because we're learning.
I mean, we didn't have mentorsabout what it's like to open
your marriage, so it was like,oh shit, that made me
uncomfortable.
Let's talk about this, andmaybe there was a new rule.
And then a year later, it'slike, oh, that rule is kind of
dumb, we'd move beyond it.
Yeah, yeah, it's just thisconstant ebb and flow that I'm
sure everyone in this lifestyleis familiar with.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
And even though he hates it, I'm an over
communicator and will force youto talk about everything and I'm
like deeper, deeper.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
I love that.
So how did it go at theswingers club?
Speaker 2 (18:36):
It was weird but freeing.
This is going to sound horrible, but I mean it in the best way.
There was this older womanthere, very old, and she had
ginormous breasts that I thinkhung to her waist and she was on
the dance floor by herself justdancing, and I thought it was
(18:56):
the most amazing thing I hadever seen in my life, because
outside and in my family growingup and in my childhood, there's
so much pressure to be perfectand look perfect and act a
certain way and be proper anddon't be provocative and don't
turn anybody on.
And here was this woman whoowned everything about herself
(19:19):
and was living her best life andthat, to me, was perfection.
So that was like the moment wewalked into the club.
So it was scary, but that wasamazing.
Speaker 1 (19:30):
Oh, wow, I remember when I first jumped into the
swingers world and same thing,on a journey of discovering
non-monogamy and everything,basically my whole sex life.
I was exploring it and it'sfunny because, like, the
swingers clubs are that kind oflike gateway, entryway, the door
(19:54):
for people, because there'sjust, you know, almost every
city has one right.
So but I was, I had the sameexperience, whitney, where I
walked into this community ofpeople where they're so
nonjudgmental, so welcoming andfriendly and the women doesn't
(20:14):
matter what the fuck you looklike, you're just, you got
curves, you're going to rock thecurves, you got your.
You know you don't have curves,you're going to rock it still,
you're like.
The confidence of these womenwas so inspiring to me I was
like, oh, thank God, this is asafe space where you can just be
you and explore yourself andnot have to worry about, like
(20:35):
you were saying, the standardsof beauty that you're used to or
whatever.
That's amazing.
So what was it like for you,scott?
Speaker 3 (20:44):
Yeah, it was like I don't even recall this woman,
right?
It's interesting how peopletake different memories from
different things, especially inthese first formative moments,
like zero recollection of any ofthat.
I recall how seedy anddisgusting the club looked, and
it was.
It closed not long after ourfirst experience by being
(21:05):
condemned.
I mean it was not the nice clubto go to and down.
We didn't know that.
We learned quickly.
You know I was very like onguard, right, like all of a
sudden we're in this vulnerableplace.
I'm self-conscious about myself.
You know, my wife is beautifuland everyone here is probably
just out to steal my wife fromme.
You know.
So a little bit of a more kindof tortured relationship, I
(21:29):
think, probably with theexperience.
But it became hot reallyquickly.
We didn't do anything withanyone else but we ended up
having sex ourselves in thisroom, right Like in a club.
That the idea six months priorto this that we would have had
sex in a room full of people,like I would have told you
you're out of your goddamn mindright.
(21:52):
So it was.
I mean, it was freeing fromthat element, because it was
that first real experience inforay until, like you know, this
is all okay, they're doingtheir thing over there, we're
doing our thing over here, wedon't have to participate with
other people.
We weren't there, we weren'tready yet.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
And for the record, when he says sex he means he
fucked me for like 30 seconds.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
So in retrospect it's again, it's interesting, the
things that stick with you andI'm like, without having the
vocabulary and knowing what anyof this was, and I'm like,
without having the vocabularyand knowing what any of this was
.
The one like vividly distinctmemory from that entire night is
we end up in this room wherethere's lots of beds and there's
people around having sex andwhatever, and of course, because
(22:36):
this is the way it goes, thatwe now know the bed that's right
in front of the door is thelast one to get filled, because
no one wants to have sex rightin front of the doorway.
But we were committed when inRome we are committed, the last
one to get filled, because noone wants to have sex right in
front of the doorway.
But we were committed when inRome we are committed.
So we like do our thing and Igo down on Whitney for a bit and
whatever, and then we fuck andlike we do our thing and this is
(22:57):
normal.
And then, like literally lookup and there is a group of
people that have congregatedaround the doorway and I'm like
holy shit, there's likeliterally a dozen or more people
that were here watching and wehop up off the bed and we're
like getting our clothes onwhatever and some unknown person
that I never saw and have noidea.
I just hear someone say, oh,you're finished already.
(23:19):
And like again, I didn't knowabout cuckolding, I didn't know
about humiliation fetishes, Ididn't know about femdom, I
didn't know about cuckolding, Ididn't know about humiliation
fetishes, I didn't know aboutfemdom, I didn't know about any.
At this point we're just like,hey, swinger world, let's like
go have sex with other people,but it is literally the single
most vivid memory of probablylike any exploration in the
lifestyle and it's it's.
It's just, it's interesting tome looking back now how our kink
(23:40):
and lifestyle have evolved andI've learned to embrace like
these parts of myself and beingturned on by these kinks and
stuff that like oh yeah, ofcourse that was the thing, cause
there was this like it was asuper hot moment, but then it
was like humiliating in front ofpeople and like other people
would.
I think someone even said likecan I tap in?
Or something like that.
You know, there's like thiswhole thing, that's like so
(24:06):
anyway, it was like again,without knowing and having any
of the vocabulary for this, thatlike first experience with like
oh, maybe there's something tothis, like humiliation fetish,
you know, sex with other people,thing that I just didn't know
about.
Speaker 1 (24:19):
Yeah, it's interesting that that stuck out,
that that was the memory thatreally stuck for you and because
it was a hot moment, right, itwas a very sexy moment and
everything like that.
But then there, yeah, there wasthat little thing that somebody
said that was probably a bitembarrassing or, you know, like
you said, humiliating.
(24:40):
Right but the combinationbetween the sexy atmosphere and
everything like your sexy wifeand I just fucked, and
everything like that, combinedwith that little bit of
embarrassment, probably just hitthe right switch.
Speaker 3 (24:56):
It's hard to put words to.
Yeah, it really is.
It's an interesting.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
We kept going back for more.
Speaker 3 (25:01):
Yeah, so it did not stop us yeah.
Speaker 1 (25:06):
So that's great, that you had a positive experience
at the Swingers Club and I thinkthat for a lot of people
listening you'll be able torelate to this, where couples
start in the swinging communitywith the expectation that you're
both going to be sleeping withother people.
But it's funny how often ithappens where the husband is
(25:29):
like actually I just likewatching better.
Speaker 2 (25:34):
Yeah, they all wanted me.
Eventually, right, when we wentto more stuff, they all wanted
me to play with their wives andI was like, ugh, I mean now I
have some females I enjoy beingwith, but at the time I just
wanted to get fucked, right.
So yeah, that was the swingersworld for sure.
Speaker 3 (25:53):
It seemed like there was definitely a heavy
undercurrent of that and Irealized it pretty quickly too.
So, yeah, that was the swingersworld of like, well, hey, what
if the two of them played, andwhatever.
(26:20):
And I very quickly was like, oh, yeah, yeah, like even the
three of you like do your thing,I would love to watch.
And from the first time thathappened I was like, literally
if I never slept with anotherwoman, like I don't care, like
this is the hottest thing I'veever witnessed in my entire life
.
And and so it was like thiskind of quick transition from
(26:42):
like, hey, let's go open ourmarriage and like the two of us
sleep with other couples orwhatever, into you can sleep
with other couples, or let'sjust start looking for single
men.
Because we also realized veryquickly that it was difficult to
find a couple that wascomfortable playing with the
woman, even though everyonewants a unicorn, if they know
(27:02):
that there's a man involved, ifthey don't understand this
lifestyle, because they justassume I'm going to be upset, or
or she maybe is like, well,you're saying that, but like, am
I going to be pressured intohaving that?
Like it was just very difficultto find, I think, couples open
and accepting to the fact oflike.
No, I really am just totallyhappy watching Um and that kind
(27:24):
of moved us very quickly to likewell, we don't have to find
couples Like, we can just gofind single men.
Um, and you know, we did thatfor a while really until we
learned what cuck cuckolding wasand in fact I think, the first
time we learned about the wordcuckolding.
It's sometimes perceivedassociation with humiliation,
which I don't know that itnecessarily always has to be.
(27:44):
We both were like Jesus Christ.
Who's into that?
Speaker 1 (27:49):
Yeah, it sounds harsh , right yeah what is wrong with
you people?
Speaker 2 (27:52):
It sort of implies cheating, which he has a
cheating fantasy that I stillhave not done, because I just
can't go have sex with someonewithout telling him.
Speaker 1 (28:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
I just, I've tried, and then I always tell him
beforehand yeah, so Well that'sfair.
Speaker 1 (28:09):
That's fair.
But yeah, it's funny whenpeople just think, especially in
the swingers world, they thinkof the world with the word
cuckolding.
They're like degrading,damaging, mean, unfair.
Because in the swingers worldit's all about a lot about.
It has to be equal.
(28:29):
Everybody's got to becomfortable.
You've got to meet halfway.
You've got to have the rules,boundaries, limits that
everybody's comfortable with.
It's got to be fair.
It's got to be comfortable.
You got to meet halfway.
You got to have the rules,boundaries, limits that
everybody's comfortable with.
It's got to be fair.
It's got to be everyone Keepeverybody happy, kind of thing.
Speaker 3 (28:39):
Right and very hard to coordinate.
It sounds easy.
Yeah, it's very hard to getright with four people.
We found Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (28:51):
That's why when I was in the swingers world, I want
and I don't want to have toworry about all that other shit
that I know is there for all theright reasons and everything
just to keep everybody happy orwhatever, but I was like I don't
need that shit.
Speaker 3 (29:03):
Yeah, totally.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
I just want to go get fucked.
Speaker 3 (29:08):
You sound alike.
Speaker 1 (29:08):
Yeah, so was that right around the time that you
guys learned about hot wifing?
Did you learn about hot wifingfirst?
Speaker 2 (29:15):
So I think hot wifing was first and then, also for
context, we have three youngchildren at this time, so when
we left the church they were allunder the age of 10.
So exhausting and anyway.
So we're also navigating thatright, like I was the one at the
swingers clubs like, uh, it'stime to fuck because I gotta go
(29:37):
pay the babysitter yeah, yeah,you want to talk the other
downside of swingers clubs.
Speaker 3 (29:41):
It's like why the fuck are you all waiting until
one in the morning, like we'reon the clock here?
If you're not getting shitstarted by 10, 30 like this,
ain't happening you know we'rein our early 30s, talking like
we're 70.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
So, yeah, so we learned about the hot wiping
world and that sounded perfectand fun to me.
And then, soon after that, wewere talking and he was like,
what would you think aboutFemdom?
And I actually was angry.
I was like you want to addanother thing to my to-do list?
Are you serious?
(30:16):
I was trying to be anentrepreneur.
Add another thing to my to-dolist, like, are you serious?
Like here, I was trying to bean entrepreneur at the time with
something totally unrelated andthen three small children who
drove me crazy, and then youwant me to dom you?
Like really, I mean, yeah, sowe got into that world.
First, I think, I settled down.
I was like, all right, show mewhat you mean.
And I think that's probably whywe're still married right Is
(30:39):
because we understand that wehave the best intentions for
each other and that, um, thatwe're a safe space for each
other.
And so, you know, I calmed downa little bit and I was like
show me what you mean.
And so, I think you know weprobably looked at a few things
and then went to a party we'rethe type we just dive in and so
I think we met a few people,went to dinner with a couple
people, found a couple localfemdom groups, and then I was
(31:04):
like, okay, maybe we're alreadydoing this a little bit.
And so I was like maybe thisisn't so hard, and I don't know
that.
Oh, you know what?
We went to a party and it was aBDSM party.
And there was this guy and heloves being a teacher.
We saw him a few timesafterwards and he loved that.
(31:26):
This was our first time at aBDSM event.
And he was like do you want meto top your husband and show you
what it's like?
And I was like, yes, I wouldlove that.
And it was amazing.
Scott crumbled under his whipand I saw the pleasure it gave
(31:47):
him and I was all in.
I was like, yep, I'll do this,because when it comes to the
pleasure of my partner obviouslymy pleasure too, but the
pleasure of my partner as well Iam all in.
Oh my God.
Speaker 1 (32:02):
Scott, what was that like for you?
Was that the first time thatyou had been really submissive
like that?
Speaker 3 (32:13):
Certainly in a sexual aspect.
I don't even know that we I'mtrying to remember the timeline
there I don't even know that weever really like played with
like a paddle or spanking oranything like, even anything
like vanilla bdsm.
We were, you know, just kind oftalking about what does this
look like and and what, what toexplore.
(32:34):
And it sort of happened byhappenstance because that event
was at that original swingersclub we went to the first time.
So it wasn't like you knowthey're in a lot of respects.
I don't know what it's.
I know that sometimes there'ssome variability geographically.
Certainly where we're at there'sa pretty marked difference
(32:54):
usually between like the swinger, like sex kink world and the
BDSM kink world, and they don'tusually intermix all that.
Right, yeah, so this happened tobe one of the few events that
was at a swingers club but hadlike lifestyle elements, to like
BDSM lifestyle elements, whichis why I think, like we still
(33:16):
hadn't even fully discoveredthat there's like these public
dungeon things and whatever thatyou can go do full BDSM play Um
.
So we were like we were verygreen, had really just been kind
of talking about it, we didn'treally go expecting to do that
type of play Um, and he, herecognized in us and like we
were literally about to get upand leave because we didn't know
(33:39):
anyone, it felt weird.
It wasn't like the normalswinger party we had been to and
he saw it on our faces and readit immediately and was like hey
, hey, come over here and likeinvited us into the group and
like made us feel at ease andkind of the night evolved from
there.
So it was, we didn't go into itplanned, it was definitely a
transformative experience.
Only because I'd neverexperienced that before and like
(34:01):
getting to subspace and thingslike that, yeah, it was.
It was pretty amazing, yeah.
Speaker 1 (34:08):
And Whitney did that give you the confidence to be
like you know I could do this,like I could definitely feel
comfortable doing this.
Speaker 2 (34:17):
Yes, I think, um, I think I also realized it
wouldn't be a chore, right?
Because at that time in my lifethere was just always so many
things that were a chore.
And when I saw that it would befun and it would be sexual and
it would be a release for bothof us, I realized, okay, this
(34:38):
sounds awesome.
Let's let's try it out.
Speaker 1 (34:41):
Yeah, yeah.
I have a friend who, uh, shestarted dating this guy.
He's a cuck who really wantedto be dominated Like he, just he
really wanted that.
So he he, you know, knowbrought it up to her and she was
like, okay, well, I'll givethis a try.
And she's like, she's like itwas fucking exhausting, like it
(35:03):
felt like a job, like it wasjust like I was working at it
every day.
I thought that sucks, like it'sso, but I get what you're
saying when you're like, oh, ohman, this is something else now
I need to do, like another roleI need to play.
That would the thought of thatwould suck, but it sounds like
that experience at the club foryou guys was helpful.
Speaker 2 (35:26):
And I will say, yeah, for me it also as it evolved.
I am a natural dom, it's just.
I joke, I've never met someonewho wouldn't submit to me
whether that's in the regularworld or not.
That sounds so conceited, but Idon't know, I just have a way
of being.
I guess that people just dowhat I say and so yeah, so as we
(35:52):
played in the world, it justcame naturally.
So I did a whole year-longprogram learning all about being
a dom and understanding myselfand all the different implements
and toys and ways of playing.
Speaker 1 (36:08):
So it was like a course that you did, or
something we dove all in.
Speaker 3 (36:12):
Yeah, it's a program around the state here in a few
of the big metro areas that theydo.
It's like a once monthlyweekend long kind of mentors
program.
Speaker 2 (36:22):
Oh wow, yeah, it was lots of hours.
Speaker 3 (36:24):
Yeah and uh, I, I think what it, what it did, is
like everything that we've likelearned has been like there's,
there are these things people do, but you can like have balance
in your life, and I think whatwe started to realize by then
diving into this other world islike you can also meld these two
(36:45):
worlds, like the the sexy kinkworld and the BDSM kink world.
And it's not like the movieswhere like, hey, let's enter
into a femdom relationship, sowe're signing a contract in
blood and I sleep in a dogkennel 365, right, like that is
not what this is and I don'twant anyone walking away from
this episode thinking like holyshit, so she just beats him
(37:06):
every like.
No, this is like a, this is likea fun release, supplement to
our, our sex life and help justrealize that like you can grab
all these little pieces to likebuild this healthy, vibrant,
beautiful sex life together.
And that's how, like, as weexplored non-monogamy and like
the open relationship and thattransitioned into kind of the
(37:27):
one-sidedness of it, thenplaying with this femdom and
BDSM world, and then all of asudden, we realized like femdom
and BDSM world.
And then all of a sudden, werealized like hey, there's this
whole little unique way of thatwe could create our sex life
where we're melding all of itand we can incorporate these
like submission aspects as wellas the open marriage aspects and
like, oh shit, there's a wordfor that, it's called cuckolding
(37:49):
at least in the way that wepractice it and the way that
we've now started to kind ofexplore and and you know, and
like the prototypical, you know,chastity in terms of like
chastity, cuckolding.
That involves things likechastity play and and like
humiliation play and things likethat.
But in this like again, notlike you sleep in a kennel at
(38:13):
the foot of the bed 365 days ayear, but like, hey,
occasionally we go do this fun,play, experience and incorporate
other people.
Speaker 2 (38:23):
I don't know if that's a little bit rambling,
but hopefully explaining myselfsomewhat well.
Speaker 1 (38:29):
Oh, I love that Shout out to the kink world man,
They've got it figured out.
The resources for people whowant to learn about it, the
opportunities for in-personevents where you can go and meet
other people, where a perfectlynewbie couple can walk into an
event and have somebodyrecognize oh, like they're new,
(38:51):
like I'm going to help them outhere, you know, let's like make
them feel welcome.
Speaker 3 (38:54):
Well, and that that was the final piece of that
story, transitioning in as wediscovered the kink world.
We learned about this mixer onthe BDSM kink side of the world
that some folks were hosting,called a hot wife cuckolding
mixer.
And you know we were like, well, we know this hot wifing thing,
we're into that.
I'm not so sure about thiscuckolding thing, but we went to
(39:15):
this mixer and became friendswith a lot of people.
We went a lot over the yearsand have done a lot with people
we met there and that was kindof that final transition of like
we tried this all in swinging.
That wasn't 100% for us.
We tried this all in BDSM thing.
That wasn't a hundred percentfor us.
(39:38):
Oh, now we found it's this hotwife cuckolding kind of melding
of the two.
Um, and to to your point, like,yeah, that that that world,
they've just figured a lot outin terms of making people feel
seen and heard and welcome.
Um, you know, like doesn'tmatter.
To whitney's earlier point, itdoesn't matter age body's
earlier point, it doesn't matterage body type, you know, sexual
orientation, like none of thatmatters, it's just very
(40:01):
welcoming the support andresources and that's kind of how
we found our way into thisworld and really I've kind of
like this is this?
Is it?
If we go to a swingers club,it's because they're doing some
sort of hot wifing, cuckoldingsomething.
If we go to a BDSM club, it'ssomething about female-led
(40:22):
relationship, hot wifing,cuckolding something.
It kind of helped us find thatniche.
Speaker 1 (40:24):
Yeah, I think that the cuckolding world can learn a
lot from how things are set upand available for people in the
kink world and just all of theother things that go along in
the kink world.
Man, they've got to figure itout with consent, uh, consent,
everything.
Everything is centered aroundconsent, like it's very much
missing in the cuckoldinglifestyle.
(40:44):
As far as um, casual events andstuff go, it's very different,
yeah, but, um, okay, so youdecided to go down the BDSM
route, the more kind of kinkyroute that I'm assuming that,
scott, that means that you werekind of exploring more about the
submissive humiliation teasingpart.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
Exactly.
Speaker 1 (41:10):
I want to know what that was like for you because a
few, a couple of months ago Ihad a guest on who talked about
the dark side of cuckolding,where his he had his
insecurities about himself,about his own sense of
masculinity and what that shouldbe for him, and even though he
(41:34):
was very turned on by thehumiliation aspect and the kind
of teasing part of it, he foundit damaging.
And it was the first time Ireally learned the danger around
that, like if you don't do thisin a healthy way, if you don't
explore this in a healthy way,it can be really damaging to a
(41:54):
person.
And so what was it like for you?
Did you have to really kind ofreconcile with your own
insecurities in a way that wasgoing to be helping your
relationship instead of harmingyou?
Speaker 3 (42:09):
Yeah, definitely.
I mean, up until this question,we've made this sound like a
lot of lollipops and roses andjust this fun exploration.
There's a lot of work that wentinto this over the last decade
or so and I still we talk aboutit all the time.
I distinctly remember it wasthe second person that Whitney
(42:31):
had ever been with without melike alone.
Whitney had ever been withwithout me like alone, and I
think the second time that shemet this person, then I was
present and I literally sat inlike the famed cuckold chair for
an hour and I legitimatelythought I was watching, over the
course of an hour, my marriageend before my parents.
(42:52):
Really, it was that likeemotionally, like holy shit, I'm
never coming back from this.
I'd never heard my wife soundlike that.
I've never seen her act likethat in bed.
I'd never seen her squirt likethat Right, like all of these
things where I'm like holy shit,like why, like I'm done Right,
I literally thought I watched mymarriage ending.
Speaker 2 (43:16):
He's always had that problem, though, Even before,
like he's always just waitingfor me to leave and I'm like
dude, I'm still here.
It's been 20 years.
Come on, Give me some credit.
Finally it's getting better.
Speaker 3 (43:29):
I'm getting there.
But yeah, I mean, I think backto Whitney's earlier comment
about, like you know it wastongue in cheek at the time
about like being an overcommunicator, because she really
is.
I mean, she communicates a lot.
She's the type that like, oh,something feels off in this
friendship.
Like come in, sit down and tellme what it is and let's talk
this out.
There's no like you know,whatever.
(43:51):
Um, that's just her personalityand so, um, which is good,
because I'm the type that willretreat, like after a night or
experience like that, I'm goingto stop talking, I'm going to
close up, I'm going to, like,work through things in my head,
um, and that's that's had tohappen.
Uh, had to happen a lot becauseI've had to grapple a lot with
those.
You know she's already made someof the jokes on this episode
(44:13):
about, you know, coming quicklyand whatever, and there's a lot
of views of self-image andmasculinity wrapped up in the
ability to last a long time, andthis idea that there are a lot
of men out there that mayprovide some aspect of sex for
my wife that's better than I'llever be able to is tough to
(44:35):
grapple with.
I mean, it took a really longtime and I think part of that
initial resistance to, like whenI first learned what cuckolding
was like you all are insane ifyou're like doing that, like
this open marriage stuff is onething, but like you're actually
leaning into your wife going andhaving better sex with other
people.
Like, are you nuts into yourwife going and having better sex
(44:56):
with other people?
Like, are you nuts?
Um, and it took me a while tocome around to the fact that,
like me, wishing it wasn't trueis never going to change
anything, right, um, but it alsodoesn't mean anything about me
as a person, right, if mybiology is such that I come
quick more quickly than someother guy.
Um, like, that doesn'tinherently mean anything
(45:17):
different about me as a personor a human.
It just means that I don't lastas long fucking my wife and
that guy lasts longer fucking mylife.
Like it's literally nothing morethan that, um, and and when you
can do that mental work of, ofthat type of comfort, it, it
becomes fun, it becomes a joy oflike you know, hey, I can make
you sushi at home, but if we goto this five-star sushi
(45:39):
restaurant with a trained sushichef, it's going to be 10 times
better, like, let's go to thefucking sushi restaurant and
have sex with this bowl, because, like, you deserve that and
that sounds amazing and we bothget something out of it.
Uh, but that was not.
That was not that first nightwhen I literally spent an hour
thinking holy shit, this was it.
I just, I just ruinedeverything.
Speaker 1 (45:59):
Wow, yeah, see, I get like.
Over the last decade I've had alot of conversations with cucks
, cuck, wannabes, and this is abig question that they have that
comes up all the time, over andover and over again.
How will she not lose respectfor me if I cannot be the one to
(46:21):
provide her with what she needssexually?
How will she not lose respectfor me?
So, whitney, I keep tellingthese guys it's not how it
fucking works.
In fact, him giving you thisgift of like, abundance of this,
just makes you love them evenmore.
And I keep saying this shit,but like they're not, they're
still sitting there shittingtheir pants worrying about it.
(46:43):
What do you think?
Speaker 2 (46:44):
They're thinking too shallow.
I mean, respect is earnedoutside the bedroom, and then
you want to spend time withsomeone in the bedroom because
of sex.
But also, there are a millionthings that build respect and
sex is only one of them.
And I'm not going to spend mylife with someone just because
they can fuck me for a long time.
(47:07):
I'm going to spend my life withsomeone who can provide for me
in every single other way, youknow, emotionally, financially,
intellectually.
That's what I respect, and thesex is extra.
And just because my cuck can'tfuck me doesn't mean that he
(47:28):
doesn't know how to please me.
So that would be false as well.
Speaker 3 (47:32):
Yeah, that's the other thing.
I see a lot and I know thiskink is out there.
I never try and kink shamepeople and if you're
legitimately into it it's fine,but I think it's a lot of the
keyboard warriors who aretalking about the like.
Yeah, I just want my wife to golike fuck other hung men and
just like, never even touch meagain and you know, whatever
(47:56):
Like for us, like I don't knowhow that, how that works,
because the way that thatrespect is retained is because,
yeah, there are these things,there are these certain aspects
that just I mean this is how itis.
No, even the best bull in theworld is, with the biggest dick
that can last seven hoursfucking like there's going to be
other aspects that he's not asgood at right Like just nobody's
perfect at everything.
Um, and and being as good andgiving as you can be with what
(48:20):
you're capable of and good at,and providing opportunities for
the other things you aren'tcapable and good at Like that
that's that's the perfect recipe, I think, for a fulfilling sex
life.
Um, and and sticking your headin the sand of like well, if we
just pretend that I can fuck for20 minutes, then I think for a
fulfilling sex life, andsticking your head in the sand
of like, well, if we justpretend that I can fuck for 20
minutes, then everything's rightin the world isn't going to
(48:42):
change the fact that you can't,so why not lean into what you're
really good at?
It was many embarrassing yearsinto our marriage before I
learned that like oh, you meanlike most husbands don't go down
on their wives for 30 or 45minutes every time they have sex
.
Like that's just like what youdo, like that's what got my wife
off and I want to get my wifeso like.
(49:02):
And so to learn that people godown for the token three or four
minutes, yeah, I'm just likewait, what I was horrified for
my friends Absolutely horrified.
But I lean into what I'm like.
My wife has no shortage oforgasms at home without bulls,
Right, Just because maybe mystamina isn't up to what some
other bulls are, and then shecan go have that aspect that
(49:25):
that we don't have at home.
You know that we can go dotogether or apart, but together
the way we play our king, and souh, yeah.
Speaker 2 (49:33):
One.
One other thing I often thinkis like how much more a man you
know I'm putting those in airquotes is my cuck than other men
, because he is willing to admithis fault, he is willing to
communicate with me and he'swilling to put my needs above
his own, whether those be sexualor other.
So to me that's even morerespectful, whether those be
(49:55):
sexual or other.
Speaker 1 (49:55):
So to me that's even more respectful, absolutely.
It's very selfless and it'sabout giving the gift of variety
of experiences for you.
Yeah, so you're not just I meanlike I think that's fucking
amazing.
I've always said it cucks arelike the best partners.
I mean they're just amazing.
Speaker 3 (50:11):
Tell me more.
Speaker 1 (50:12):
Especially cucks, who are really good at eating pussy
.
Speaker 2 (50:15):
Right, I mean that's their only option.
Right, it's a lot of fun.
Speaker 3 (50:18):
I don't understand these guys.
I'm like what do you mean?
Speaker 1 (50:22):
And, let's face it, most women what 80%, 90% of
women require clit stimulationto have an orgasm.
So, yes, piv sex is fun,getting dick down is great, but
especially by a big dick andeverything but like the like the
getting your pussy after likefuck.
(50:44):
Yes, yeah, sign me up there thelike.
Speaker 3 (50:49):
Sometimes I feel a little bad when it happens with
the bulls, but it's like thesingle greatest self-esteem
builder in my entire marriage iswhen Whitney is with someone
having a really great time butjust like they're new, they
don't know her body as well, andthen can't quite get her over
that hump and it's like the tapin of like hey Scott, like
(51:12):
finger me and make me come acouple of times, because that
really does once.
It's I.
It's a horrible joke, but Ijoked the other day when this
happened that she's like.
It's like like the Pringles ofsex, right, like once you pop
you can't stop right.
The orgasms, but it was likeyeah as soon as that first one
happens, then, like, she is offfor the hour, right, I mean
(51:36):
orgasm after orgasm or whatever,and that like tap in of, like,
hey, you know, finger me and putme over the edge.
I'm like, yeah, stand aside,giant hung guy with an hour of
stamina, and let me show you,you know, yeah, the, the secrets
here.
Um, you know, I think there'ssome respect in right, it's,
it's, it's knowing your partner,it's being free to give, but
also knowing them so well thatlike, yeah, you, you could tap
(51:57):
in and 30 seconds later, thatorgasm that the bull's been
searching for for 20 minutes,you know, then sets off the rest
of a fun encounter.
That's a pretty big boost for acuck, I think.
Speaker 1 (52:09):
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
And you know, I feel like it'sjust cuck holding is just adding
.
It's adding more excitement andopportunity to your already
fulfilled sex life.
I mean, yeah, you might not beable to last long as some other
dude, but, like you were saying,that's just one part of sex,
(52:32):
that is not the be-all end-all.
But so many cucks get sofocused on size and endurance
being the be-all end-all becausemaybe it's the typical porn
scripts that you see in porn,where it is that that's the
magic ingredient the size andhow long he can last for, and
then she's coming, you know,like so fake.
Speaker 2 (52:55):
She's squealing away, and maybe that's one reason
we're different is we didn'twatch a ton of porn growing up.
He did watch some he was a badlittle Mormon but I didn't watch
any.
I mean, I saw a couple thingsbut I was like, ah, turn it off.
So we just went into this notknowing what it should look like
(53:19):
.
Speaker 1 (53:19):
Yeah, you know, that's probably it, and I've
heard a lot of uh podcaststalking about um flipping the
script when it comes to sexinstead of it being the usual
script in porn, and creating ascript that works for you and
that you want to, or if you wantto switch it up or whatever,
and doing that instead and itbeing way more fulfilling than
(53:43):
just expecting the usual scriptof it starts with this and then
that goes to that and that andthinking that that's like the
secret recipe.
So for all the cucks listening,I'm telling you right now is
not the secret recipe?
Something like 90 of women donot have an orgasm.
Hetero women do not have anorgasm with a one night stand
random guy on the first time.
(54:03):
Yeah, like it's just they don'tyou do, and it's because we
follow the same usual scripts,right, when it comes to
cuckolding.
You can build whatever scriptyou want, including a cuck who
eats pussy like a champ.
Speaker 2 (54:18):
It better be that way .
That's part of it and it'sfunny.
Speaker 3 (54:20):
it's funny you say that and I'm sure someday this
will change.
But like 10 years into openingour marriage, there's never been
another partner that has madeher orgasm from oral Cause it
really does take a long time.
But every time we tell that to anew perspective bull, it's the
bravado like oh well, that'sjust because you haven't met me,
like we'll change that, andsure as shit.
(54:42):
They go to get together fortheir first time and he goes
down and does a respectable jobfor four or six minutes and then
it's, you know, it's like, well, here, here we go again.
But it, I mean it, yeah, it's,it's true to your.
Your point it's, uh, you know,figuring out what works.
Uh, it takes time, it takesknowing someone, it takes
(55:03):
knowing a body.
And yeah, getting that from aone-night stand is just
impractical.
Speaker 1 (55:08):
You know it's so funny, my whole life I had the
four to five-minute pussy eatingthing.
My whole life until I was in myearly 30s.
Then I met this random guy wholoved to eat pussy.
I mean like you know the kind,like love, like lives for it,
you know, Yep and he took asweet ass time and he was down
(55:31):
there for 3040 minutes and thatwas the first time I actually
had an orgasm from oral and Iwas like, oh, this is the best
fucking thing.
I have ever had in my life, likeholy fucking shit.
And after that I was like, okay, that's it, I'm just going to
lay back, I'm going to put on afucking movie.
You get your face between mylegs and you just stay down
(55:52):
there?
Speaker 2 (55:53):
We do that sometimes.
If I'm too in my head orwhatever I'm like, I'll turn on
a movie.
Speaker 3 (55:58):
She thought it was a little weird.
The first time I suggested Iwas like why don't you put on?
Speaker 2 (56:05):
your show and just I'll spend an episode and like
what that's weird, that seemsrude, right, right.
Speaker 3 (56:09):
But we're like being anxious and in her head it would
have taken 30 or 40 minutes.
You know, like 12 minutes laterthe TV's off and it's like okay
, let's get like, okay, thatworked.
And I'm just, I'm telling youguys, if you're listening to me
and you've never been down formore than five minutes, like
knock that shit off.
Speaker 1 (56:26):
Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 3 (56:27):
Just go especially.
Speaker 1 (56:34):
Yeah and yeah, just go slow and rhythmic and lick
the drips off the ice cream coneand you will get there
eventually, but yeah, okay, um.
So what's what's cuckoldinglike for you guys now?
What does it look like for younow?
Because this has been quite thejourney that has evolved.
Speaker 2 (56:49):
Yeah, so I hate being online.
So Scott runs our accounts andwe have curated our profiles to
be very specific and so it iseasy for people to be weeded out
.
So he manages all of theincoming messages and he's
(57:11):
really good at picking guys thatI will like.
So it's, I've become pickierwith age, I think last 10 years
I just I slept with a lot ofpeople and it was a lot of fun,
and now I'm getting a littlepickier and he's working with
that, but it does mean less play.
But, yeah, so usually he'llpick a guy.
You know we'll go meet them.
(57:32):
They are into this worldalready, right?
They're asking to be part of acuckold relationship, and if we
hit it off during breakfast orlunch or whatever we go to, um,
then we'll typically meet them adifferent time.
It's rare We'll meet the like,go to the bedroom the same day,
(57:54):
um, often at a hotel, justbecause and um, yeah, so we all
go and get the job done.
That's a way to put it.
We've had some more intricatescenes with people who are more
advanced.
I would say, like we had afriend once video for us and
(58:16):
that helped open his eyes to howamazing cuckolding can be.
And then yeah, so Scott'splayed a few different ways,
like we've had bowls who areopen to him sucking dick,
because I love watching that,and then others are not.
He has had to be in the otherroom on work calls sometimes.
(58:39):
Yeah, so that was fun.
Speaker 3 (58:41):
That is.
It was fun for me, hot anddisconcerting at the same time.
Let me tell you oh, mute, quick, quick, quick.
She's getting loud.
Speaker 2 (58:50):
He'll fold our clothing, maybe towards the end
I'll send him out to.
One time I made him go make uslunch because we were at it for
a couple of hours and I wasfamished.
I'm like go get me some lunchand the bowl too.
Of hours and I was famished,I'm like go get me some lunch
and the bowl too.
So it looks a lot of differentways.
I would say it ebbs and flowsand changes depending on how
busy we are in our regular life.
Speaker 3 (59:11):
I think we're so personality driven and the
people we want to invite in oursex life at this point that we
will joke sometimes that we'rekind of chameleons.
We'll, we'll adapt to thesituation.
So, if someone's like reallyinto the like heavy cuckolding,
like humiliation, like teasing,play, like sign me up, I'm all
about it.
(59:31):
If someone's like you know,yeah, maybe just like don't
really say anything, I'm kind ofnew to this and like it makes
me nervous, like I'll hang outand watch, right, uh, yeah,
we're, we're kind of open towhatever um, which, uh, which
makes it easy to focus much moreon is this person the right fit
(59:52):
, and where we are in our livesnow and how busy we are.
If we're going to invitesomeone into our relationship,
we just want to have a reallygood time.
We don't have to want to workthat hard at it.
So we're, I think we're a lotmore open.
Like if we have two or threedifferent play partners going at
a time, like the play will lookdifferent with all three of
them.
Right, yeah, for him.
You know, uh, whitney's on onBumble and occasionally we'll
(01:00:15):
find dates on Bumble.
Like she's had a few guys thatshe's seen several times that
I've just never met.
It's been just completelyindependent, like that's cool.
Other guys, like I said, whereI'll watch, or we'll be much
more involved.
So we're just kind of open toif you're the right personality
and fit for what we want in ourrelationship, what are you into,
and let's explore it.
(01:00:35):
You know, which is a lot of fun.
Speaker 1 (01:00:38):
We're pretty much out of time at this point, which
sucks because I feel like wehave so much more to talk about,
but that's OK.
What do you before I wrap thisup, what do you?
What are you guys hoping thatpeople will take away from this
episode?
That's important to you.
Speaker 3 (01:00:57):
Yeah, I think, from my perspective and kind of where
, where I'm at in the lifestyleprobably talking more to the
cucks or cuck wannabes and Idon't mean that in like a
degrading sense, but like peoplewho are interested in this
lifestyle but haven't quitetaken or had the opportunity to
take the step is it can beemotionally taxing but also so
(01:01:21):
worth it.
And I think a lot of times weget caught up in if this
experience isn't amazing thenit's bad, and I think that
probably frightens a lot ofpeople off from trying to
explore this lifestyle.
Because the reality I think thetakeaway from me is the reality
is you will have difficultmoments and you'll have bad
experiences.
And you'll have bad experiencesand you'll have tough emotional
(01:01:44):
and mental challenges tograpple with and work through.
But the flip side of that, thereward of it, is just so
overwhelmingly positive thatit's worth that work because
it's added such incredibledimensions to our relationship,
not just sexual, the way wecommunicate, the way we parent,
the way we friend with friend,like.
(01:02:06):
So much of it is informed byhow we've explored this
lifestyle.
Um, that like, don't let thoselike, but what if like?
Is your wife going to loserespect for you?
Like no, uh, but like, also,you have to talk to your wife.
Like, why are you posting onReddit about how your wife's
going to feel?
Go talk to your wife.
So I think that would be mysingle biggest takeaway is like
(01:02:28):
don't let the fear of thedifficult moments that are 100%
going to come if you don't jumpinto this lifestyle from the
cuckold perspective andcertainly from the cuckold
perspective too, because youknow I don't want to put words
in your mouth, but I thinkWhitney would say that when I've
had a bad experience or reactedpoorly, that's taken just as
(01:02:48):
much of a mental toll on herbecause we're in love, right.
If you find your wife beinglike, oh sorry, you're having a
difficult time, dick, like leaveme alone, you probably need to
take a step back and have atough conversation, right.
Like it just naturally isemotionally taxing on her as
much as it is me.
So don't let that scare you.
Speaker 2 (01:03:10):
Yeah, I guess mine was going to be similarly veined
, in that it is one piece ofyour life and it will become.
You know, cuckolding and kinkystuff and sexual stuff becomes
better when you're puttingeffort in there and when you're
putting effort in everywhere,right?
So, as a complete person, andthat includes that open
(01:03:34):
communication, whether you needto go see a therapist or you
need to journal If you want tohave this kind of a lifestyle.
It's a heavy lifestyle, right,it is complicated and amazing
and beautiful.
Just like he said, I would notchange it for the world, but
you've got to do a lot of workto make sure you're the kind of
person that will be a goodpartner, right?
(01:03:55):
So, like, especially as thewoman, as the cuckoldress, I
have a lot of power and I I'mnot going to quote, uh, whatever
, that is, lord of the Rings orsomething- but anyway with great
power.
Yeah, so, but I am going to saythat that is true, like you need
to be the kind of woman thatdeserves that power, and you
(01:04:19):
need to be aware of yourself andhow you're treating your cuck
and how you're making sure theirneeds are met as well.
Speaker 1 (01:04:29):
Yes, absolutely, it's a big responsibility.
It is, yeah, all right.
Well, I do have your FetLifeprofiles that I can share in the
description notes for today.
So if anyone listening wants toreach out, you can find them
there.
Just have a look in thedescription notes for today.
So if anyone listening wants toreach out, you can find them
there.
Just have a look in the shownotes.
Whitney and Scott, thank you somuch for coming on the show
(01:04:49):
today.
I have thoroughly enjoyed thisconversation.
This has been great.
Speaker 3 (01:04:54):
So thank you.
You never want to be the boringpodcast.
Speaker 1 (01:04:59):
No, it's been fun, so thank you so much.
Yeah, thanks for having us onAll right?
Speaker 3 (01:05:01):
No, it's been fun, so thank you so much yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:05:06):
Thanks for having us on.
That's going to be it fortoday's episode.
Thank you so much for joiningme.
Make sure you go tovenuscuckoldresscom.
That's where you can book aprivate chat with me and you can
also join the Queens Quarterscommunity and get all the
amazing benefits like theprivate podcast and the helpful
cuck tier, where you can getamazing benefits like the
private podcast and the helpfulCuck tier, where you can get key
(01:05:26):
holding for the privateSnapchat group, monthly private
chats with me and weekly livehangouts and invites to special
live events.
Oh, and you can also submit aquestion or confession for the
show.
Just go to venuscuckledresscomand click on the link that says
the podcast.
Make sure you follow me on BlueSky Social.
(01:05:48):
Yes, I said Blue Sky Social.
Fuck Twitter.
My handle there is atCuckoldress V.
All right, that's it fortoday's show.
You guys, we'll see you nexttime.
So here's what's coming up on the show.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
We went to a party and it was a BDSM party and
there was this guy and he lovedthat this was our first time at
a BDSM event.
And he was like, do you want meto top your husband and show
you what it's like?
And I was like, yes, I wouldlove that.
And it was amazing.
Scott crumbled under his whipand I saw the pleasure it gave
(00:34):
him and I was all in.
I was like, yep, I'll do this,because when it comes to the
pleasure of my partner obviouslymy pleasure too, but the
pleasure of my partner as well Iam all in.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
This is the Venus Cuckoldress Podcast, a place to
learn all things cuckolding Forthe curious, for the passionate
and for the sexually empoweredwoman who wants it all.
Let's go.
(01:21):
Welcome to the show.
I'm your host, venus.
I have such a great episode foryou today.
Let's go.
And then now they're a verykinky cuckolding couple.
(01:44):
This story feels really specialto me because I really feel
like it showcases how, if youhave a curious approach and an
open mind, it really helpscouples to understand each other
and their deepest desires andbe really compatible when it
(02:05):
comes to those kinds of things.
Whitney and Scott have alsoshared their FetLife profile, so
if you would like to check itout, you can find that
information in the show notesfor today's episode.
Right now I am doing a longdistance move and for all of you
who've done a move before, youknow how much it fucking sucks.
So I'm up to my eyeballs andboxes and shit, so it's a bit of
(02:26):
a crazy time for me.
I'm not doing a lot of the livechats in the Queens Quarters
community right now, but I willbe doing that as soon as I get
everything all set up in my newlocation, so you can look
forward to seeing some more livechats happening in the Queens
Quarters community next monthand you can always find all the
(02:47):
details for that informationabout the days, the times and
all that stuff and they are freechats as well in the events
page on venuscuckoldresscom.
Again, you can find theinformation for that in the show
notes for today's episode.
All right, that's it forannouncements.
Let's jump into the show rightafter this quick message from
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(04:15):
Joining me on the show?
I have Whitney and Scott comingto share their really
interesting story about how theyevolved into a cuckolding
relationship.
I'm looking forward to this one.
Welcome to the show.
You guys Say hello to all thelisteners.
Hi everybody.
Speaker 3 (04:34):
This is Whitney.
This is Scott.
Thanks for having us on Venus.
Speaker 1 (04:37):
Yeah, thanks for coming.
Okay, so when I first learnedI've learned a little bit about
your story and I was just likefucking fascinated, because I
don't hear this very often whereyou guys are.
You were a couple, you were in,like you were devout, what's
called devout Mormons right, I'mnot religious.
(04:58):
I've never been religious, so Idon't really know anything
about religions but like.
I'm pretty sure that that'slike very conservative right,
Correct?
Speaker 3 (05:09):
It is.
It's like you've got like whatwould be like the, the like woke
liberal Christians would belike the Protestants and like
the crazy, crazy fundamentalistswould be like Jehovah's
witnesses.
We're like.
We're like a, an inch or twoover from the Jehovah's
Witnesses if these are namesthat mean anything to you as a
non-religious person.
(05:29):
So it's not like the supercultish level of religion, but
it is a very, very conservativereligion.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
Wow, okay, I've heard of it in the past.
I've talked to some people inthe past where, like, the wife
came from a very religiousbackground and so she struggled
with you know, when he broughtup cuckolding she struggled with
it.
So I've heard of that, but Ihaven't really it where, like,
(06:02):
both people come from a very,very religious conservative
background and then kind ofexplore this together.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
I don't I'm I've so many questions for you, so I'm
so excited to talk about thiswe're excited to talk about it
we joke that we won the lotterybecause we met and married
within 10 months and then, 10years later, left the church
together at the same time andstayed married, and now we're
happily living this lifestyle.
This just blows my mind likethis yeah, we celebrate 20 years
(06:34):
this month.
Speaker 1 (06:36):
It is like you guys won the lottery the fact that
you guys, you know, started outthat way and and very
conservative, and then decidedto start questioning your faith.
Was it one of you that broughtit up and was like I don't know
about this.
Should we keep going down thisroad?
Speaker 3 (06:53):
Yeah, I mean, it's the cliche in this lifestyle,
right, as the husband alwaysbrings up the cuckolding to the
wife.
Differently from the kinkaspect, it was definitely me
that brought up the faithaspects and had struggled for a
while, probably for a couple ofyears.
At the point I finally saidsomething.
Part of the problem and thoselisteners that come from
(07:14):
conservative religions probablyknow this that it's pretty rare
for a couple that meets in aculture like that and leaves
faith behind to stay together.
That's usually faith is likethe anchoring glue right and
once that's gone people realizelike holy shit, we're like
totally different people.
I'm not even sure I like you andso you know, I mean, there was
(07:36):
like a real struggle with evenopening up about, you know,
difficulties with faith, withthis sort of recognition that
like this could really sendthings off the rails.
Right, there's a calculus oflike do I choke it down, shut up
and spend the rest of my life,mormon, you know, even if I'm
not believing?
Or do I rock the boat?
Because if I rock the boat Icould be ending my marriage.
(07:58):
Yeah, and that was sort of thedecision you had to walk into it
with.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
And majority of people we know that have
transitioned out of Mormonism.
There's very, very few thatremained married.
Speaker 2 (08:16):
I mean we're, we're a small number, Wow.
So, whitney, were you kind oflike shocked by this, or?
Yeah for sure I was shocked andhorrified, luckily for him, you
know I joke like if you hearour our story of how we met and
married like we were already afemale led relationship during
our courtship as well, and so Iknew what I wanted when I chose
(08:36):
him to marry.
And then he he was a verysubmissive and loving and kind
those first 10 years of marriage.
So when he brought this up, Iwas like no, I'm all in on this
marriage still, and I hatehypocrisy and lying so much that
as soon as we started lookinginto the church it crumbled very
fast and I did not blame him atall.
Speaker 1 (08:58):
Oh, wow, yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:01):
Dodged a bullet.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
Oh, I love this.
I have a female-ledrelationship.
I'm not giving up this man.
Speaker 2 (09:09):
Well, we didn't know that, Right right right, we
didn't have that language at thetime.
But we look back and we're like, oh, we've always been this way
, even as Mormons.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
We have a good friend that pointed this out a few
years ago that we're close withand could be open about the
lifestyle with, and she put itreally like I've never forgotten
it because I thought it was sogreat is she described it as we
had been living this lifestylebefore we had the vocabulary to
describe the lifestyle we wereliving.
And as we looked back, we'relike, oh man, yeah, like, take
(09:39):
the like sex kink out of it.
I mean we from the day we met,really our first date was
basically her telling me youshould ask me out it.
I mean we from the day we metreally our first date was
basically her telling me youshould ask me out Right.
I mean, just from from the getgo.
It was a very like turned onits head and in retrospect it
was like oh yeah, we've been ina female led relationship for 20
years.
We just didn't know that's whatit was until I don't know seven
(09:59):
years ago or something likethat.
Um, so yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:02):
Wow Okay, wow okay.
So you, you guys, decided toditch the mormon thing the
church.
Yeah, sorry, I'm so notreligious I'm like the thing you
know the world, like I don'tknow the, the church stuff, like
, yeah, sorry my ignorance.
Um, so you decided to move pastthat together.
(10:23):
And then what was it like afterthat?
How did you start talk, havingdiscussions around?
Well, more discussions aroundsexy stuff, kinky stuff,
fantasies.
Speaker 2 (10:36):
We've always been really sexual.
If we had to live apart fromeach other, like for school
reasons or internships, we wouldwrite really sexy emails.
Or maybe we couldn't masturbatebecause that wasn't allowed,
but we would sort of have phonesex without touching ourselves.
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (10:55):
So it was about as hot as it sounds.
Speaker 2 (10:57):
Hey, I was turned on.
We just couldn't finish.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
You can't masturbate.
So what do you do?
Like, hump a pillow, like Idon't know, like what do you do?
Speaker 2 (11:06):
You just masturbate, like what no.
Speaker 3 (11:10):
You cock block yourself repeatedly yeah, oh,
wow.
But yeah, this was even asdevout Mormons, you definitely
(11:35):
can't do that, but it soundedhot, so we're talking about it
anyway.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
So we are people showed up in our fantasies.
Speaker 3 (11:41):
Definitely not allowed up in our fantasies,
definitely not allowed.
So we already kind of had thislike banter of fun.
Um of you know thesepossibilities and there were a
handful of times where, like, wewere daring enough to be like
okay, like you know, if youcould do like anything and like
the religious rules didn'tmatter.
(12:03):
And I remember being flooredthis was years before we left
the church Like what would youdo?
And and uh, my wife Whitney,she's like, oh, I would probably
have a one night stand withsomeone and I was like I'm sorry
, you know what Sounded like thebest thing ever to me.
Um, so yeah, it was one of thosethings.
When we left the church, we westarted just kind of exploring
(12:25):
ourselves.
A couple of months later, wewatched porn together for the
first time.
We'd never watched porn.
That's highly frowned on in theMormon religion and that sort
of spawned this conversation oflike hey, you know some of those
fun things we used to fantasizeor talk about.
Uh, you know, like, if wereally don't believe and aren't
like handcuffed by this wholeMormon thing, like there's no.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
What if you know?
Speaker 3 (12:47):
like we could actually do that.
I mean, that's kind of how itstarted.
It was, I don't know four orfive months later, before we
like tiptoed into a club orsomething.
But again, like we didn't know,like we didn't even know what
the word cuckold was at thispoint, was, at this point, still
right.
This was like the edgiest weknew is like there are these
really seedy, disgusting peoplethat are married but have sex
(13:08):
with people they're not marriedto right Like that was like the
extent of our knowledge of this,like whole world out there, but
it sounded hot right so likewell, we could actually look at
that.
Is there anything around wherewe live?
So that's kind of how itstarted.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
And honestly, we accidentally, we made a profile
on one of the websites andaccidentally said yes, we're
coming.
And then, you know, we were onReddit, of course, trying to
learn everything we could abouthow to do this, and it said once
you RSVP, if you don't show,you're very rude.
And we didn't want to be rude,so we went to the club the first
time.
(13:43):
Oh wow, rude.
So we went to the club thefirst time, that's right.
Speaker 1 (13:49):
Oh wow, I was like, well, I mean, if we are svp you
have to.
Yeah, well, okay, so you, youkind of got pushed and not
pushed into it, but you kind ofgot obligated to go me oh yeah,
yeah, both of us to the club,yeah I mean you could, you could
put it that way.
Speaker 3 (14:00):
I mean I were excited , like at the end of the day we
could have on RSVP to not gone.
So it was one of those like youknow how sometimes you just
need like the very, very minor,like yeah, go for it, and you're
like, oh, okay, like fine, Ithink that's really what it was.
Was this just like that?
That last little mental hurdlethat just became so much easier
because we got the like emailfrom the group that was hosting,
(14:22):
like we're so excited to hostyou and we had read all the
stuff in the forums and you know, uh, the like swinger subreddit
that it's like poor etiquetteto rsvp and not go.
So it was like that last littleyeah, that last little push of
like okay, let's just go checkit out.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Yeah so how do you go from I still can't get over the
fact that you're not allowed tomasturbate like I'm like what?
Oh my god.
Um, how do you go from notbeing able to masturbate or
watch porn to going to aswingers club like were you
fucking terrified or what?
Speaker 2 (14:56):
we were nervous.
I think we're reallyadventurous people in our life
and and then it, you know,transitioned into our lifestyle
life too.
I'm also I'm extremelyextroverted and love adventures
probably even more so than him.
So it just felt like thisawesome adventure and I think we
(15:17):
were in a very open mindset,exploratory moment in our life,
exploratory moment in our life,and so it was just this fun
thing for me at least.
I turn nervous, scared energyinto excited positivity, usually
Wow.
Speaker 3 (15:34):
Yeah, it's almost weird.
It's hard to explain,especially if you haven't been
religious.
I'm sure lots of listeners whohave left conservative religions
will will understand.
But there's this, there's thissort of period of like
rediscovering yourself sounds solike cliche and silly.
(15:54):
I'm like struggling with theright words.
But there's this, this period oflike really taking a massive
step back and, like most of us,you just kind of like you grow
up in life and you're taughtwhat you're taught by your
parents and those are the moralsyou inherit and you may like
dabble on the margins of like oh, my parents said don't drink
alcohol, but I like drinkingalcohol or whatever Most people
(16:15):
don't like really do that likedeep, deep thinking of like well
, what is it that I actuallyfundamentally believe?
And when you leave a religionlike that, you're kind of forced
to take this massive step backand just throw everything out
and start over again in a waythat I think a lot of people
that again, even if, like on themargins, they move something,
(16:38):
you know they change theirmorals a little bit from how
they're grown up.
I mean, we really just had totake this giant step back and
down to literally what are wedoing with our lives type of
purpose discussions, that allwent out the window.
We had a very clear path andbook written all about what this
(16:58):
life is for.
That all of a sudden, we didn'thave anymore, and so I think
that just kind of made us,together with our personalities,
really open to like what's theworst that could happen.
We go to this club and realizelike everyone really is a demon
with a tail growing out of it,and we just never go back Like,
okay, let's go check it out, youknow?
Um, so yeah, it's just kind ofhow it worked for us to to be
(17:21):
like and we've taken this allthroughout the lifestyle that
like people ask about well, haveyou really had bad experiences?
And like they've had someexperiences we wouldn't repeat.
But by and large, we're justthe types of people that are
like, well, that was a fuckingexperience.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
Yeah, like move on yeah.
So, yeah, definitely approachedit from a learning perspective
and a will.
I like this.
We didn't have a lot of rulesgoing into everything.
We just always made sure thatwe would talk about it
afterwards and then maybe newrules would come up.
But to this day we don't have aton of rules.
Speaker 3 (17:58):
I can't, because we're learning.
I mean, we didn't have mentorsabout what it's like to open
your marriage, so it was like,oh shit, that made me
uncomfortable.
Let's talk about this, andmaybe there was a new rule.
And then a year later, it'slike, oh, that rule is kind of
dumb, we'd move beyond it.
Yeah, yeah, it's just thisconstant ebb and flow that I'm
sure everyone in this lifestyleis familiar with.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
And even though he hates it, I'm an over
communicator and will force youto talk about everything and I'm
like deeper, deeper.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
I love that.
So how did it go at theswingers club?
Speaker 2 (18:36):
It was weird but freeing.
This is going to sound horrible, but I mean it in the best way.
There was this older womanthere, very old, and she had
ginormous breasts that I thinkhung to her waist and she was on
the dance floor by herself justdancing, and I thought it was
(18:56):
the most amazing thing I hadever seen in my life, because
outside and in my family growingup and in my childhood, there's
so much pressure to be perfectand look perfect and act a
certain way and be proper anddon't be provocative and don't
turn anybody on.
And here was this woman whoowned everything about herself
(19:19):
and was living her best life andthat, to me, was perfection.
So that was like the moment wewalked into the club.
So it was scary, but that wasamazing.
Speaker 1 (19:30):
Oh, wow, I remember when I first jumped into the
swingers world and same thing,on a journey of discovering
non-monogamy and everything,basically my whole sex life.
I was exploring it and it'sfunny because, like, the
swingers clubs are that kind oflike gateway, entryway, the door
(19:54):
for people, because there'sjust, you know, almost every
city has one right.
So but I was, I had the sameexperience, whitney, where I
walked into this community ofpeople where they're so
nonjudgmental, so welcoming andfriendly and the women doesn't
(20:14):
matter what the fuck you looklike, you're just, you got
curves, you're going to rock thecurves, you got your.
You know you don't have curves,you're going to rock it still,
you're like.
The confidence of these womenwas so inspiring to me I was
like, oh, thank God, this is asafe space where you can just be
you and explore yourself andnot have to worry about, like
(20:35):
you were saying, the standardsof beauty that you're used to or
whatever.
That's amazing.
So what was it like for you,scott?
Speaker 3 (20:44):
Yeah, it was like I don't even recall this woman,
right?
It's interesting how peopletake different memories from
different things, especially inthese first formative moments,
like zero recollection of any ofthat.
I recall how seedy anddisgusting the club looked, and
it was.
It closed not long after ourfirst experience by being
(21:05):
condemned.
I mean it was not the nice clubto go to and down.
We didn't know that.
We learned quickly.
You know I was very like onguard, right, like all of a
sudden we're in this vulnerableplace.
I'm self-conscious about myself.
You know, my wife is beautifuland everyone here is probably
just out to steal my wife fromme.
You know.
So a little bit of a more kindof tortured relationship, I
(21:29):
think, probably with theexperience.
But it became hot reallyquickly.
We didn't do anything withanyone else but we ended up
having sex ourselves in thisroom, right Like in a club.
That the idea six months priorto this that we would have had
sex in a room full of people,like I would have told you
you're out of your goddamn mindright.
(21:52):
So it was.
I mean, it was freeing fromthat element, because it was
that first real experience inforay until, like you know, this
is all okay, they're doingtheir thing over there, we're
doing our thing over here, wedon't have to participate with
other people.
We weren't there, we weren'tready yet.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
And for the record, when he says sex he means he
fucked me for like 30 seconds.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
So in retrospect it's again, it's interesting, the
things that stick with you andI'm like, without having the
vocabulary and knowing what anyof this was, and I'm like,
without having the vocabularyand knowing what any of this was
.
The one like vividly distinctmemory from that entire night is
we end up in this room wherethere's lots of beds and there's
people around having sex andwhatever, and of course, because
(22:36):
this is the way it goes, thatwe now know the bed that's right
in front of the door is thelast one to get filled, because
no one wants to have sex rightin front of the doorway.
But we were committed when inRome we are committed, the last
one to get filled, because noone wants to have sex right in
front of the doorway.
But we were committed when inRome we are committed.
So we like do our thing and Igo down on Whitney for a bit and
whatever, and then we fuck andlike we do our thing and this is
(22:57):
normal.
And then, like literally lookup and there is a group of
people that have congregatedaround the doorway and I'm like
holy shit, there's likeliterally a dozen or more people
that were here watching and wehop up off the bed and we're
like getting our clothes onwhatever and some unknown person
that I never saw and have noidea.
I just hear someone say, oh,you're finished already.
(23:19):
And like again, I didn't knowabout cuckolding, I didn't know
about humiliation fetishes, Ididn't know about femdom, I
didn't know about cuckolding, Ididn't know about humiliation
fetishes, I didn't know aboutfemdom, I didn't know about any.
At this point we're just like,hey, swinger world, let's like
go have sex with other people,but it is literally the single
most vivid memory of probablylike any exploration in the
lifestyle and it's it's.
It's just, it's interesting tome looking back now how our kink
(23:40):
and lifestyle have evolved andI've learned to embrace like
these parts of myself and beingturned on by these kinks and
stuff that like oh yeah, ofcourse that was the thing, cause
there was this like it was asuper hot moment, but then it
was like humiliating in front ofpeople and like other people
would.
I think someone even said likecan I tap in?
Or something like that.
You know, there's like thiswhole thing, that's like so
(24:06):
anyway, it was like again,without knowing and having any
of the vocabulary for this, thatlike first experience with like
oh, maybe there's something tothis, like humiliation fetish,
you know, sex with other people,thing that I just didn't know
about.
Speaker 1 (24:19):
Yeah, it's interesting that that stuck out,
that that was the memory thatreally stuck for you and because
it was a hot moment, right, itwas a very sexy moment and
everything like that.
But then there, yeah, there wasthat little thing that somebody
said that was probably a bitembarrassing or, you know, like
you said, humiliating.
(24:40):
Right but the combinationbetween the sexy atmosphere and
everything like your sexy wifeand I just fucked, and
everything like that, combinedwith that little bit of
embarrassment, probably just hitthe right switch.
Speaker 3 (24:56):
It's hard to put words to.
Yeah, it really is.
It's an interesting.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
We kept going back for more.
Speaker 3 (25:01):
Yeah, so it did not stop us yeah.
Speaker 1 (25:06):
So that's great, that you had a positive experience
at the Swingers Club and I thinkthat for a lot of people
listening you'll be able torelate to this, where couples
start in the swinging communitywith the expectation that you're
both going to be sleeping withother people.
But it's funny how often ithappens where the husband is
(25:29):
like actually I just likewatching better.
Speaker 2 (25:34):
Yeah, they all wanted me.
Eventually, right, when we wentto more stuff, they all wanted
me to play with their wives andI was like, ugh, I mean now I
have some females I enjoy beingwith, but at the time I just
wanted to get fucked, right.
So yeah, that was the swingersworld for sure.
Speaker 3 (25:53):
It seemed like there was definitely a heavy
undercurrent of that and Irealized it pretty quickly too.
So, yeah, that was the swingersworld of like, well, hey, what
if the two of them played, andwhatever.
(26:20):
And I very quickly was like, oh, yeah, yeah, like even the
three of you like do your thing,I would love to watch.
And from the first time thathappened I was like, literally
if I never slept with anotherwoman, like I don't care, like
this is the hottest thing I'veever witnessed in my entire life
.
And and so it was like thiskind of quick transition from
(26:42):
like, hey, let's go open ourmarriage and like the two of us
sleep with other couples orwhatever, into you can sleep
with other couples, or let'sjust start looking for single
men.
Because we also realized veryquickly that it was difficult to
find a couple that wascomfortable playing with the
woman, even though everyonewants a unicorn, if they know
(27:02):
that there's a man involved, ifthey don't understand this
lifestyle, because they justassume I'm going to be upset, or
or she maybe is like, well,you're saying that, but like, am
I going to be pressured intohaving that?
Like it was just very difficultto find, I think, couples open
and accepting to the fact oflike.
No, I really am just totallyhappy watching Um and that kind
(27:24):
of moved us very quickly to likewell, we don't have to find
couples Like, we can just gofind single men.
Um, and you know, we did thatfor a while really until we
learned what cuck cuckolding wasand in fact I think, the first
time we learned about the wordcuckolding.
It's sometimes perceivedassociation with humiliation,
which I don't know that itnecessarily always has to be.
(27:44):
We both were like Jesus Christ.
Who's into that?
Speaker 1 (27:49):
Yeah, it sounds harsh , right yeah what is wrong with
you people?
Speaker 2 (27:52):
It sort of implies cheating, which he has a
cheating fantasy that I stillhave not done, because I just
can't go have sex with someonewithout telling him.
Speaker 1 (28:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
I just, I've tried, and then I always tell him
beforehand yeah, so Well that'sfair.
Speaker 1 (28:09):
That's fair.
But yeah, it's funny whenpeople just think, especially in
the swingers world, they thinkof the world with the word
cuckolding.
They're like degrading,damaging, mean, unfair.
Because in the swingers worldit's all about a lot about.
It has to be equal.
(28:29):
Everybody's got to becomfortable.
You've got to meet halfway.
You've got to have the rules,boundaries, limits that
everybody's comfortable with.
It's got to be fair.
It's got to be comfortable.
You got to meet halfway.
You got to have the rules,boundaries, limits that
everybody's comfortable with.
It's got to be fair.
It's got to be everyone Keepeverybody happy, kind of thing.
Speaker 3 (28:39):
Right and very hard to coordinate.
It sounds easy.
Yeah, it's very hard to getright with four people.
We found Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (28:51):
That's why when I was in the swingers world, I want
and I don't want to have toworry about all that other shit
that I know is there for all theright reasons and everything
just to keep everybody happy orwhatever, but I was like I don't
need that shit.
Speaker 3 (29:03):
Yeah, totally.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
I just want to go get fucked.
Speaker 3 (29:08):
You sound alike.
Speaker 1 (29:08):
Yeah, so was that right around the time that you
guys learned about hot wifing?
Did you learn about hot wifingfirst?
Speaker 2 (29:15):
So I think hot wifing was first and then, also for
context, we have three youngchildren at this time, so when
we left the church they were allunder the age of 10.
So exhausting and anyway.
So we're also navigating thatright, like I was the one at the
swingers clubs like, uh, it'stime to fuck because I gotta go
(29:37):
pay the babysitter yeah, yeah,you want to talk the other
downside of swingers clubs.
Speaker 3 (29:41):
It's like why the fuck are you all waiting until
one in the morning, like we'reon the clock here?
If you're not getting shitstarted by 10, 30 like this,
ain't happening you know we'rein our early 30s, talking like
we're 70.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
So, yeah, so we learned about the hot wiping
world and that sounded perfectand fun to me.
And then, soon after that, wewere talking and he was like,
what would you think aboutFemdom?
And I actually was angry.
I was like you want to addanother thing to my to-do list?
Are you serious?
(30:16):
I was trying to be anentrepreneur.
Add another thing to my to-dolist, like, are you serious?
Like here, I was trying to bean entrepreneur at the time with
something totally unrelated andthen three small children who
drove me crazy, and then youwant me to dom you?
Like really, I mean, yeah, sowe got into that world.
First, I think, I settled down.
I was like, all right, show mewhat you mean.
And I think that's probably whywe're still married right Is
(30:39):
because we understand that wehave the best intentions for
each other and that, um, thatwe're a safe space for each
other.
And so, you know, I calmed downa little bit and I was like
show me what you mean.
And so, I think you know weprobably looked at a few things
and then went to a party we'rethe type we just dive in and so
I think we met a few people,went to dinner with a couple
people, found a couple localfemdom groups, and then I was
(31:04):
like, okay, maybe we're alreadydoing this a little bit.
And so I was like maybe thisisn't so hard, and I don't know
that.
Oh, you know what?
We went to a party and it was aBDSM party.
And there was this guy and heloves being a teacher.
We saw him a few timesafterwards and he loved that.
(31:26):
This was our first time at aBDSM event.
And he was like do you want meto top your husband and show you
what it's like?
And I was like, yes, I wouldlove that.
And it was amazing.
Scott crumbled under his whipand I saw the pleasure it gave
(31:47):
him and I was all in.
I was like, yep, I'll do this,because when it comes to the
pleasure of my partner obviouslymy pleasure too, but the
pleasure of my partner as well Iam all in.
Oh my God.
Speaker 1 (32:02):
Scott, what was that like for you?
Was that the first time thatyou had been really submissive
like that?
Speaker 3 (32:13):
Certainly in a sexual aspect.
I don't even know that we I'mtrying to remember the timeline
there I don't even know that weever really like played with
like a paddle or spanking oranything like, even anything
like vanilla bdsm.
We were, you know, just kind oftalking about what does this
look like and and what, what toexplore.
(32:34):
And it sort of happened byhappenstance because that event
was at that original swingersclub we went to the first time.
So it wasn't like you knowthey're in a lot of respects.
I don't know what it's.
I know that sometimes there'ssome variability geographically.
Certainly where we're at there'sa pretty marked difference
(32:54):
usually between like the swinger, like sex kink world and the
BDSM kink world, and they don'tusually intermix all that.
Right, yeah, so this happened tobe one of the few events that
was at a swingers club but hadlike lifestyle elements, to like
BDSM lifestyle elements, whichis why I think, like we still
(33:16):
hadn't even fully discoveredthat there's like these public
dungeon things and whatever thatyou can go do full BDSM play Um
.
So we were like we were verygreen, had really just been kind
of talking about it, we didn'treally go expecting to do that
type of play Um, and he, herecognized in us and like we
were literally about to get upand leave because we didn't know
(33:39):
anyone, it felt weird.
It wasn't like the normalswinger party we had been to and
he saw it on our faces and readit immediately and was like hey
, hey, come over here and likeinvited us into the group and
like made us feel at ease andkind of the night evolved from
there.
So it was, we didn't go into itplanned, it was definitely a
transformative experience.
Only because I'd neverexperienced that before and like
(34:01):
getting to subspace and thingslike that, yeah, it was.
It was pretty amazing, yeah.
Speaker 1 (34:08):
And Whitney did that give you the confidence to be
like you know I could do this,like I could definitely feel
comfortable doing this.
Speaker 2 (34:17):
Yes, I think, um, I think I also realized it
wouldn't be a chore, right?
Because at that time in my lifethere was just always so many
things that were a chore.
And when I saw that it would befun and it would be sexual and
it would be a release for bothof us, I realized, okay, this
(34:38):
sounds awesome.
Let's let's try it out.
Speaker 1 (34:41):
Yeah, yeah.
I have a friend who, uh, shestarted dating this guy.
He's a cuck who really wantedto be dominated Like he, just he
really wanted that.
So he he, you know, knowbrought it up to her and she was
like, okay, well, I'll givethis a try.
And she's like, she's like itwas fucking exhausting, like it
(35:03):
felt like a job, like it wasjust like I was working at it
every day.
I thought that sucks, like it'sso, but I get what you're
saying when you're like, oh, ohman, this is something else now
I need to do, like another roleI need to play.
That would the thought of thatwould suck, but it sounds like
that experience at the club foryou guys was helpful.
Speaker 2 (35:26):
And I will say, yeah, for me it also as it evolved.
I am a natural dom, it's just.
I joke, I've never met someonewho wouldn't submit to me
whether that's in the regularworld or not.
That sounds so conceited, but Idon't know, I just have a way
of being.
I guess that people just dowhat I say and so yeah, so as we
(35:52):
played in the world, it justcame naturally.
So I did a whole year-longprogram learning all about being
a dom and understanding myselfand all the different implements
and toys and ways of playing.
Speaker 1 (36:08):
So it was like a course that you did, or
something we dove all in.
Speaker 3 (36:12):
Yeah, it's a program around the state here in a few
of the big metro areas that theydo.
It's like a once monthlyweekend long kind of mentors
program.
Speaker 2 (36:22):
Oh wow, yeah, it was lots of hours.
Speaker 3 (36:24):
Yeah and uh, I, I think what it, what it did, is
like everything that we've likelearned has been like there's,
there are these things people do, but you can like have balance
in your life, and I think whatwe started to realize by then
diving into this other world islike you can also meld these two
(36:45):
worlds, like the the sexy kinkworld and the BDSM kink world.
And it's not like the movieswhere like, hey, let's enter
into a femdom relationship, sowe're signing a contract in
blood and I sleep in a dogkennel 365, right, like that is
not what this is and I don'twant anyone walking away from
this episode thinking like holyshit, so she just beats him
(37:06):
every like.
No, this is like a, this is likea fun release, supplement to
our, our sex life and help justrealize that like you can grab
all these little pieces to likebuild this healthy, vibrant,
beautiful sex life together.
And that's how, like, as weexplored non-monogamy and like
the open relationship and thattransitioned into kind of the
(37:27):
one-sidedness of it, thenplaying with this femdom and
BDSM world, and then all of asudden, we realized like femdom
and BDSM world.
And then all of a sudden, werealized like hey, there's this
whole little unique way of thatwe could create our sex life
where we're melding all of itand we can incorporate these
like submission aspects as wellas the open marriage aspects and
like, oh shit, there's a wordfor that, it's called cuckolding
(37:49):
at least in the way that wepractice it and the way that
we've now started to kind ofexplore and and you know, and
like the prototypical, you know,chastity in terms of like
chastity, cuckolding.
That involves things likechastity play and and like
humiliation play and things likethat.
But in this like again, notlike you sleep in a kennel at
(38:13):
the foot of the bed 365 days ayear, but like, hey,
occasionally we go do this fun,play, experience and incorporate
other people.
Speaker 2 (38:23):
I don't know if that's a little bit rambling,
but hopefully explaining myselfsomewhat well.
Speaker 1 (38:29):
Oh, I love that Shout out to the kink world man,
They've got it figured out.
The resources for people whowant to learn about it, the
opportunities for in-personevents where you can go and meet
other people, where a perfectlynewbie couple can walk into an
event and have somebodyrecognize oh, like they're new,
(38:51):
like I'm going to help them outhere, you know, let's like make
them feel welcome.
Speaker 3 (38:54):
Well, and that that was the final piece of that
story, transitioning in as wediscovered the kink world.
We learned about this mixer onthe BDSM kink side of the world
that some folks were hosting,called a hot wife cuckolding
mixer.
And you know we were like, well, we know this hot wifing thing,
we're into that.
I'm not so sure about thiscuckolding thing, but we went to
(39:15):
this mixer and became friendswith a lot of people.
We went a lot over the yearsand have done a lot with people
we met there and that was kindof that final transition of like
we tried this all in swinging.
That wasn't 100% for us.
We tried this all in BDSM thing.
That wasn't a hundred percentfor us.
(39:38):
Oh, now we found it's this hotwife cuckolding kind of melding
of the two.
Um, and to to your point, like,yeah, that that that world,
they've just figured a lot outin terms of making people feel
seen and heard and welcome.
Um, you know, like doesn'tmatter.
To whitney's earlier point, itdoesn't matter age body's
earlier point, it doesn't matterage body type, you know, sexual
orientation, like none of thatmatters, it's just very
(40:01):
welcoming the support andresources and that's kind of how
we found our way into thisworld and really I've kind of
like this is this?
Is it?
If we go to a swingers club,it's because they're doing some
sort of hot wifing, cuckoldingsomething.
If we go to a BDSM club, it'ssomething about female-led
(40:22):
relationship, hot wifing,cuckolding something.
It kind of helped us find thatniche.
Speaker 1 (40:24):
Yeah, I think that the cuckolding world can learn a
lot from how things are set upand available for people in the
kink world and just all of theother things that go along in
the kink world.
Man, they've got to figure itout with consent, uh, consent,
everything.
Everything is centered aroundconsent, like it's very much
missing in the cuckoldinglifestyle.
(40:44):
As far as um, casual events andstuff go, it's very different,
yeah, but, um, okay, so youdecided to go down the BDSM
route, the more kind of kinkyroute that I'm assuming that,
scott, that means that you werekind of exploring more about the
submissive humiliation teasingpart.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
Exactly.
Speaker 1 (41:10):
I want to know what that was like for you because a
few, a couple of months ago Ihad a guest on who talked about
the dark side of cuckolding,where his he had his
insecurities about himself,about his own sense of
masculinity and what that shouldbe for him, and even though he
(41:34):
was very turned on by thehumiliation aspect and the kind
of teasing part of it, he foundit damaging.
And it was the first time Ireally learned the danger around
that, like if you don't do thisin a healthy way, if you don't
explore this in a healthy way,it can be really damaging to a
(41:54):
person.
And so what was it like for you?
Did you have to really kind ofreconcile with your own
insecurities in a way that wasgoing to be helping your
relationship instead of harmingyou?
Speaker 3 (42:09):
Yeah, definitely.
I mean, up until this question,we've made this sound like a
lot of lollipops and roses andjust this fun exploration.
There's a lot of work that wentinto this over the last decade
or so and I still we talk aboutit all the time.
I distinctly remember it wasthe second person that Whitney
(42:31):
had ever been with without melike alone.
Whitney had ever been withwithout me like alone, and I
think the second time that shemet this person, then I was
present and I literally sat inlike the famed cuckold chair for
an hour and I legitimatelythought I was watching, over the
course of an hour, my marriageend before my parents.
(42:52):
Really, it was that likeemotionally, like holy shit, I'm
never coming back from this.
I'd never heard my wife soundlike that.
I've never seen her act likethat in bed.
I'd never seen her squirt likethat Right, like all of these
things where I'm like holy shit,like why, like I'm done Right,
I literally thought I watched mymarriage ending.
Speaker 2 (43:16):
He's always had that problem, though, Even before,
like he's always just waitingfor me to leave and I'm like
dude, I'm still here.
It's been 20 years.
Come on, Give me some credit.
Finally it's getting better.
Speaker 3 (43:29):
I'm getting there.
But yeah, I mean, I think backto Whitney's earlier comment
about, like you know it wastongue in cheek at the time
about like being an overcommunicator, because she really
is.
I mean, she communicates a lot.
She's the type that like, oh,something feels off in this
friendship.
Like come in, sit down and tellme what it is and let's talk
this out.
There's no like you know,whatever.
(43:51):
Um, that's just her personalityand so, um, which is good,
because I'm the type that willretreat, like after a night or
experience like that, I'm goingto stop talking, I'm going to
close up, I'm going to, like,work through things in my head,
um, and that's that's had tohappen.
Uh, had to happen a lot becauseI've had to grapple a lot with
those.
You know she's already made someof the jokes on this episode
(44:13):
about, you know, coming quicklyand whatever, and there's a lot
of views of self-image andmasculinity wrapped up in the
ability to last a long time, andthis idea that there are a lot
of men out there that mayprovide some aspect of sex for
my wife that's better than I'llever be able to is tough to
(44:35):
grapple with.
I mean, it took a really longtime and I think part of that
initial resistance to, like whenI first learned what cuckolding
was like you all are insane ifyou're like doing that, like
this open marriage stuff is onething, but like you're actually
leaning into your wife going andhaving better sex with other
people.
Like, are you nuts into yourwife going and having better sex
(44:56):
with other people?
Like, are you nuts?
Um, and it took me a while tocome around to the fact that,
like me, wishing it wasn't trueis never going to change
anything, right, um, but it alsodoesn't mean anything about me
as a person, right, if mybiology is such that I come
quick more quickly than someother guy.
Um, like, that doesn'tinherently mean anything
(45:17):
different about me as a personor a human.
It just means that I don't lastas long fucking my wife and
that guy lasts longer fucking mylife.
Like it's literally nothing morethan that, um, and and when you
can do that mental work of, ofthat type of comfort, it, it
becomes fun, it becomes a joy oflike you know, hey, I can make
you sushi at home, but if we goto this five-star sushi
(45:39):
restaurant with a trained sushichef, it's going to be 10 times
better, like, let's go to thefucking sushi restaurant and
have sex with this bowl, because, like, you deserve that and
that sounds amazing and we bothget something out of it.
Uh, but that was not.
That was not that first nightwhen I literally spent an hour
thinking holy shit, this was it.
I just, I just ruinedeverything.
Speaker 1 (45:59):
Wow, yeah, see, I get like.
Over the last decade I've had alot of conversations with cucks
, cuck, wannabes, and this is abig question that they have that
comes up all the time, over andover and over again.
How will she not lose respectfor me if I cannot be the one to
(46:21):
provide her with what she needssexually?
How will she not lose respectfor me?
So, whitney, I keep tellingthese guys it's not how it
fucking works.
In fact, him giving you thisgift of like, abundance of this,
just makes you love them evenmore.
And I keep saying this shit,but like they're not, they're
still sitting there shittingtheir pants worrying about it.
(46:43):
What do you think?
Speaker 2 (46:44):
They're thinking too shallow.
I mean, respect is earnedoutside the bedroom, and then
you want to spend time withsomeone in the bedroom because
of sex.
But also, there are a millionthings that build respect and
sex is only one of them.
And I'm not going to spend mylife with someone just because
they can fuck me for a long time.
(47:07):
I'm going to spend my life withsomeone who can provide for me
in every single other way, youknow, emotionally, financially,
intellectually.
That's what I respect, and thesex is extra.
And just because my cuck can'tfuck me doesn't mean that he
(47:28):
doesn't know how to please me.
So that would be false as well.
Speaker 3 (47:32):
Yeah, that's the other thing.
I see a lot and I know thiskink is out there.
I never try and kink shamepeople and if you're
legitimately into it it's fine,but I think it's a lot of the
keyboard warriors who aretalking about the like.
Yeah, I just want my wife to golike fuck other hung men and
just like, never even touch meagain and you know, whatever
(47:56):
Like for us, like I don't knowhow that, how that works,
because the way that thatrespect is retained is because,
yeah, there are these things,there are these certain aspects
that just I mean this is how itis.
No, even the best bull in theworld is, with the biggest dick
that can last seven hoursfucking like there's going to be
other aspects that he's not asgood at right Like just nobody's
perfect at everything.
Um, and and being as good andgiving as you can be with what
(48:20):
you're capable of and good at,and providing opportunities for
the other things you aren'tcapable and good at Like that
that's that's the perfect recipe, I think, for a fulfilling sex
life.
Um, and and sticking your headin the sand of like well, if we
just pretend that I can fuck for20 minutes, then I think for a
fulfilling sex life, andsticking your head in the sand
of like, well, if we justpretend that I can fuck for 20
minutes, then everything's rightin the world isn't going to
(48:42):
change the fact that you can't,so why not lean into what you're
really good at?
It was many embarrassing yearsinto our marriage before I
learned that like oh, you meanlike most husbands don't go down
on their wives for 30 or 45minutes every time they have sex
.
Like that's just like what youdo, like that's what got my wife
off and I want to get my wifeso like.
(49:02):
And so to learn that people godown for the token three or four
minutes, yeah, I'm just likewait, what I was horrified for
my friends Absolutely horrified.
But I lean into what I'm like.
My wife has no shortage oforgasms at home without bulls,
Right, Just because maybe mystamina isn't up to what some
other bulls are, and then shecan go have that aspect that
(49:25):
that we don't have at home.
You know that we can go dotogether or apart, but together
the way we play our king, and souh, yeah.
Speaker 2 (49:33):
One.
One other thing I often thinkis like how much more a man you
know I'm putting those in airquotes is my cuck than other men
, because he is willing to admithis fault, he is willing to
communicate with me and he'swilling to put my needs above
his own, whether those be sexualor other.
So to me that's even morerespectful, whether those be
(49:55):
sexual or other.
Speaker 1 (49:55):
So to me that's even more respectful, absolutely.
It's very selfless and it'sabout giving the gift of variety
of experiences for you.
Yeah, so you're not just I meanlike I think that's fucking
amazing.
I've always said it cucks arelike the best partners.
I mean they're just amazing.
Speaker 3 (50:11):
Tell me more.
Speaker 1 (50:12):
Especially cucks, who are really good at eating pussy
.
Speaker 2 (50:15):
Right, I mean that's their only option.
Right, it's a lot of fun.
Speaker 3 (50:18):
I don't understand these guys.
I'm like what do you mean?
Speaker 1 (50:22):
And, let's face it, most women what 80%, 90% of
women require clit stimulationto have an orgasm.
So, yes, piv sex is fun,getting dick down is great, but
especially by a big dick andeverything but like the like the
getting your pussy after likefuck.
(50:44):
Yes, yeah, sign me up there thelike.
Speaker 3 (50:49):
Sometimes I feel a little bad when it happens with
the bulls, but it's like thesingle greatest self-esteem
builder in my entire marriage iswhen Whitney is with someone
having a really great time butjust like they're new, they
don't know her body as well, andthen can't quite get her over
that hump and it's like the tapin of like hey Scott, like
(51:12):
finger me and make me come acouple of times, because that
really does once.
It's I.
It's a horrible joke, but Ijoked the other day when this
happened that she's like.
It's like like the Pringles ofsex, right, like once you pop
you can't stop right.
The orgasms, but it was likeyeah as soon as that first one
happens, then, like, she is offfor the hour, right, I mean
(51:36):
orgasm after orgasm or whatever,and that like tap in of, like,
hey, you know, finger me and putme over the edge.
I'm like, yeah, stand aside,giant hung guy with an hour of
stamina, and let me show you,you know, yeah, the, the secrets
here.
Um, you know, I think there'ssome respect in right, it's,
it's, it's knowing your partner,it's being free to give, but
also knowing them so well thatlike, yeah, you, you could tap
(51:57):
in and 30 seconds later, thatorgasm that the bull's been
searching for for 20 minutes,you know, then sets off the rest
of a fun encounter.
That's a pretty big boost for acuck, I think.
Speaker 1 (52:09):
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
And you know, I feel like it'sjust cuck holding is just adding
.
It's adding more excitement andopportunity to your already
fulfilled sex life.
I mean, yeah, you might not beable to last long as some other
dude, but, like you were saying,that's just one part of sex,
(52:32):
that is not the be-all end-all.
But so many cucks get sofocused on size and endurance
being the be-all end-all becausemaybe it's the typical porn
scripts that you see in porn,where it is that that's the
magic ingredient the size andhow long he can last for, and
then she's coming, you know,like so fake.
Speaker 2 (52:55):
She's squealing away, and maybe that's one reason
we're different is we didn'twatch a ton of porn growing up.
He did watch some he was a badlittle Mormon but I didn't watch
any.
I mean, I saw a couple thingsbut I was like, ah, turn it off.
So we just went into this notknowing what it should look like
(53:19):
.
Speaker 1 (53:19):
Yeah, you know, that's probably it, and I've
heard a lot of uh podcaststalking about um flipping the
script when it comes to sexinstead of it being the usual
script in porn, and creating ascript that works for you and
that you want to, or if you wantto switch it up or whatever,
and doing that instead and itbeing way more fulfilling than
(53:43):
just expecting the usual scriptof it starts with this and then
that goes to that and that andthinking that that's like the
secret recipe.
So for all the cucks listening,I'm telling you right now is
not the secret recipe?
Something like 90 of women donot have an orgasm.
Hetero women do not have anorgasm with a one night stand
random guy on the first time.
(54:03):
Yeah, like it's just they don'tyou do, and it's because we
follow the same usual scripts,right, when it comes to
cuckolding.
You can build whatever scriptyou want, including a cuck who
eats pussy like a champ.
Speaker 2 (54:18):
It better be that way .
That's part of it and it'sfunny.
Speaker 3 (54:20):
it's funny you say that and I'm sure someday this
will change.
But like 10 years into openingour marriage, there's never been
another partner that has madeher orgasm from oral Cause it
really does take a long time.
But every time we tell that to anew perspective bull, it's the
bravado like oh well, that'sjust because you haven't met me,
like we'll change that, andsure as shit.
(54:42):
They go to get together fortheir first time and he goes
down and does a respectable jobfor four or six minutes and then
it's, you know, it's like, well, here, here we go again.
But it, I mean it, yeah, it's,it's true to your.
Your point it's, uh, you know,figuring out what works.
Uh, it takes time, it takesknowing someone, it takes
(55:03):
knowing a body.
And yeah, getting that from aone-night stand is just
impractical.
Speaker 1 (55:08):
You know it's so funny, my whole life I had the
four to five-minute pussy eatingthing.
My whole life until I was in myearly 30s.
Then I met this random guy wholoved to eat pussy.
I mean like you know the kind,like love, like lives for it,
you know, Yep and he took asweet ass time and he was down
(55:31):
there for 3040 minutes and thatwas the first time I actually
had an orgasm from oral and Iwas like, oh, this is the best
fucking thing.
I have ever had in my life, likeholy fucking shit.
And after that I was like, okay, that's it, I'm just going to
lay back, I'm going to put on afucking movie.
You get your face between mylegs and you just stay down
(55:52):
there?
Speaker 2 (55:53):
We do that sometimes.
If I'm too in my head orwhatever I'm like, I'll turn on
a movie.
Speaker 3 (55:58):
She thought it was a little weird.
The first time I suggested Iwas like why don't you put on?
Speaker 2 (56:05):
your show and just I'll spend an episode and like
what that's weird, that seemsrude, right, right.
Speaker 3 (56:09):
But we're like being anxious and in her head it would
have taken 30 or 40 minutes.
You know, like 12 minutes laterthe TV's off and it's like okay
, let's get like, okay, thatworked.
And I'm just, I'm telling youguys, if you're listening to me
and you've never been down formore than five minutes, like
knock that shit off.
Speaker 1 (56:26):
Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 3 (56:27):
Just go especially.
Speaker 1 (56:34):
Yeah and yeah, just go slow and rhythmic and lick
the drips off the ice cream coneand you will get there
eventually, but yeah, okay, um.
So what's what's cuckoldinglike for you guys now?
What does it look like for younow?
Because this has been quite thejourney that has evolved.
Speaker 2 (56:49):
Yeah, so I hate being online.
So Scott runs our accounts andwe have curated our profiles to
be very specific and so it iseasy for people to be weeded out
.
So he manages all of theincoming messages and he's
(57:11):
really good at picking guys thatI will like.
So it's, I've become pickierwith age, I think last 10 years
I just I slept with a lot ofpeople and it was a lot of fun,
and now I'm getting a littlepickier and he's working with
that, but it does mean less play.
But, yeah, so usually he'llpick a guy.
You know we'll go meet them.
(57:32):
They are into this worldalready, right?
They're asking to be part of acuckold relationship, and if we
hit it off during breakfast orlunch or whatever we go to, um,
then we'll typically meet them adifferent time.
It's rare We'll meet the like,go to the bedroom the same day,
(57:54):
um, often at a hotel, justbecause and um, yeah, so we all
go and get the job done.
That's a way to put it.
We've had some more intricatescenes with people who are more
advanced.
I would say, like we had afriend once video for us and
(58:16):
that helped open his eyes to howamazing cuckolding can be.
And then yeah, so Scott'splayed a few different ways,
like we've had bowls who areopen to him sucking dick,
because I love watching that,and then others are not.
He has had to be in the otherroom on work calls sometimes.
(58:39):
Yeah, so that was fun.
Speaker 3 (58:41):
That is.
It was fun for me, hot anddisconcerting at the same time.
Let me tell you oh, mute, quick, quick, quick.
She's getting loud.
Speaker 2 (58:50):
He'll fold our clothing, maybe towards the end
I'll send him out to.
One time I made him go make uslunch because we were at it for
a couple of hours and I wasfamished.
I'm like go get me some lunchand the bowl too.
Of hours and I was famished,I'm like go get me some lunch
and the bowl too.
So it looks a lot of differentways.
I would say it ebbs and flowsand changes depending on how
busy we are in our regular life.
Speaker 3 (59:11):
I think we're so personality driven and the
people we want to invite in oursex life at this point that we
will joke sometimes that we'rekind of chameleons.
We'll, we'll adapt to thesituation.
So, if someone's like reallyinto the like heavy cuckolding,
like humiliation, like teasing,play, like sign me up, I'm all
about it.
(59:31):
If someone's like you know,yeah, maybe just like don't
really say anything, I'm kind ofnew to this and like it makes
me nervous, like I'll hang outand watch, right, uh, yeah,
we're, we're kind of open towhatever um, which, uh, which
makes it easy to focus much moreon is this person the right fit
(59:52):
, and where we are in our livesnow and how busy we are.
If we're going to invitesomeone into our relationship,
we just want to have a reallygood time.
We don't have to want to workthat hard at it.
So we're, I think we're a lotmore open.
Like if we have two or threedifferent play partners going at
a time, like the play will lookdifferent with all three of
them.
Right, yeah, for him.
You know, uh, whitney's on onBumble and occasionally we'll
(01:00:15):
find dates on Bumble.
Like she's had a few guys thatshe's seen several times that
I've just never met.
It's been just completelyindependent, like that's cool.
Other guys, like I said, whereI'll watch, or we'll be much
more involved.
So we're just kind of open toif you're the right personality
and fit for what we want in ourrelationship, what are you into,
and let's explore it.
(01:00:35):
You know, which is a lot of fun.
Speaker 1 (01:00:38):
We're pretty much out of time at this point, which
sucks because I feel like wehave so much more to talk about,
but that's OK.
What do you before I wrap thisup, what do you?
What are you guys hoping thatpeople will take away from this
episode?
That's important to you.
Speaker 3 (01:00:57):
Yeah, I think, from my perspective and kind of where
, where I'm at in the lifestyleprobably talking more to the
cucks or cuck wannabes and Idon't mean that in like a
degrading sense, but like peoplewho are interested in this
lifestyle but haven't quitetaken or had the opportunity to
take the step is it can beemotionally taxing but also so
(01:01:21):
worth it.
And I think a lot of times weget caught up in if this
experience isn't amazing thenit's bad, and I think that
probably frightens a lot ofpeople off from trying to
explore this lifestyle.
Because the reality I think thetakeaway from me is the reality
is you will have difficultmoments and you'll have bad
experiences.
And you'll have bad experiencesand you'll have tough emotional
(01:01:44):
and mental challenges tograpple with and work through.
But the flip side of that, thereward of it, is just so
overwhelmingly positive thatit's worth that work because
it's added such incredibledimensions to our relationship,
not just sexual, the way wecommunicate, the way we parent,
the way we friend with friend,like.
(01:02:06):
So much of it is informed byhow we've explored this
lifestyle.
Um, that like, don't let thoselike, but what if like?
Is your wife going to loserespect for you?
Like no, uh, but like, also,you have to talk to your wife.
Like, why are you posting onReddit about how your wife's
going to feel?
Go talk to your wife.
So I think that would be mysingle biggest takeaway is like
(01:02:28):
don't let the fear of thedifficult moments that are 100%
going to come if you don't jumpinto this lifestyle from the
cuckold perspective andcertainly from the cuckold
perspective too, because youknow I don't want to put words
in your mouth, but I thinkWhitney would say that when I've
had a bad experience or reactedpoorly, that's taken just as
(01:02:48):
much of a mental toll on herbecause we're in love, right.
If you find your wife beinglike, oh sorry, you're having a
difficult time, dick, like leaveme alone, you probably need to
take a step back and have atough conversation, right.
Like it just naturally isemotionally taxing on her as
much as it is me.
So don't let that scare you.
Speaker 2 (01:03:10):
Yeah, I guess mine was going to be similarly veined
, in that it is one piece ofyour life and it will become.
You know, cuckolding and kinkystuff and sexual stuff becomes
better when you're puttingeffort in there and when you're
putting effort in everywhere,right?
So, as a complete person, andthat includes that open
(01:03:34):
communication, whether you needto go see a therapist or you
need to journal If you want tohave this kind of a lifestyle.
It's a heavy lifestyle, right,it is complicated and amazing
and beautiful.
Just like he said, I would notchange it for the world, but
you've got to do a lot of workto make sure you're the kind of
person that will be a goodpartner, right?
(01:03:55):
So, like, especially as thewoman, as the cuckoldress, I
have a lot of power and I I'mnot going to quote, uh, whatever
, that is, lord of the Rings orsomething- but anyway with great
power.
Yeah, so, but I am going to saythat that is true, like you need
to be the kind of woman thatdeserves that power, and you
(01:04:19):
need to be aware of yourself andhow you're treating your cuck
and how you're making sure theirneeds are met as well.
Speaker 1 (01:04:29):
Yes, absolutely, it's a big responsibility.
It is, yeah, all right.
Well, I do have your FetLifeprofiles that I can share in the
description notes for today.
So if anyone listening wants toreach out, you can find them
there.
Just have a look in thedescription notes for today.
So if anyone listening wants toreach out, you can find them
there.
Just have a look in the shownotes.
Whitney and Scott, thank you somuch for coming on the show
(01:04:49):
today.
I have thoroughly enjoyed thisconversation.
This has been great.
Speaker 3 (01:04:54):
So thank you.
You never want to be the boringpodcast.
Speaker 1 (01:04:59):
No, it's been fun, so thank you so much.
Yeah, thanks for having us onAll right?
Speaker 3 (01:05:01):
No, it's been fun, so thank you so much yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:05:06):
Thanks for having us on.
That's going to be it fortoday's episode.
Thank you so much for joiningme.
Make sure you go tovenuscuckoldresscom.
That's where you can book aprivate chat with me and you can
also join the Queens Quarterscommunity and get all the
amazing benefits like theprivate podcast and the helpful
cuck tier, where you can getamazing benefits like the
private podcast and the helpfulCuck tier, where you can get key
(01:05:26):
holding for the privateSnapchat group, monthly private
chats with me and weekly livehangouts and invites to special
live events.
Oh, and you can also submit aquestion or confession for the
show.
Just go to venuscuckledresscomand click on the link that says
the podcast.
Make sure you follow me on BlueSky Social.
(01:05:48):
Yes, I said Blue Sky Social.
Fuck Twitter.
My handle there is atCuckoldress V.
All right, that's it fortoday's show.
You guys, we'll see you nexttime.
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