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March 29, 2025 71 mins

Trigger Warning: This episode discusses suicide.

Venus delves into the rarely discussed emotional aftermath of cuckolding through an unflinchingly honest conversation with John, who shares his journey from fantasy to reality – and the mental health crisis that followed.

After 20+ years of marriage, John finally revealed his deepest desire to his wife, setting them on a path neither fully anticipated. While many discussions about cuckolding focus on the erotic thrill, John describes his first real experience with brutal candor: "Fear, nausea... genuinely, just what have I done? Why have I done this to myself? It was horrifying." The raw vulnerability as he recounts coming home and breaking down in tears provides crucial perspective for anyone considering this lifestyle.

What makes John's testimony particularly valuable is the paradoxical psychology he unveils. Despite experiencing severe depression that eventually led to suicidal thoughts, he never wanted to stop – and often desired to escalate their activities. "The most warped thing about all this is that at the absolute lowest points, I wanted to continue," he explains, illuminating how the emotional struggle itself becomes intertwined with the arousal. This emotional complexity extends to feelings of sexual irrelevance that many cuckolds face: "Once your wife gets a bull that's really good at fucking her, you realize that you're not sexually valid in the same way anymore."

Through communication with his wife and developing healthier boundaries, John eventually found balance. His story serves as both caution and guidance for curious couples, highlighting the crucial importance of mental health support when exploring intense kinks. "You don't know how you're going to feel until you do it," he warns, pushing back against the "cheerleading" common in online communities. 

Cuckolding-Friendly Counselors and Therapists:

American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists

National Coalition for Sexual Freedoms - Kink Aware Professionals Directory

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