Episode 9: Dealing With Negativity In The Workplace

This episode is in response to a powerful coaching form submission from a new nurse navigating low-vibe energy in a professional setting. We walk through a real-world framework for staying aligned—even when those around you aren't—and how to reclaim your power without needing anyone else to change.

You’ll learn:

• A simple 3-part process for transforming your relationship with anyone (without needing them to change)
• How to navigate toxic or passive-aggressive coworkers
• What “toxic positivity” really is (and isn’t)
• How to stop taking on other people’s energy
• The vibrational anchoring technique that shifts how people show up to you
• How to speak your truth if you need to address something directly—with love and clarity

If you’ve ever felt drained after a shift or struggled to keep your light on around certain people, this episode will help you feel grounded, clear, and empowered. Whether you're a nurse, teacher, team leader, or anyone working with other humans, this one is packed with real talk, humor, and practical tools for staying above the green line—even when others aren’t.

💡 Ready to raise your vibe in tough environments? This episode is your toolkit.
 📝 Submit your own coaching question at vibrationfit.com/coaching

Together we're fine-tuning the process of conscious creation, and having a whole lot of FUN while doing it!

 #VibrationFit #ConsciousCreation #AboveTheGreenLine #WorkplaceWellness #Alignment #ToxicPositivity #EmpathProtection #VibrationalAnchoring #EmotionalIntelligence #NurseLife #SpiritualTools #EnergyLeadership #RaiseYourVibe #TheVibrationFitPodcast

Episode Transcript

Jordan (00:00):
Welcome to the Jordan and Vanessa show.
I'm Jordan and I'm Vanessa, andtoday's episode I'm really
excited about because it'sactually in response to a
coaching form submission on thewebsite.

Vanessa (00:11):
At vibrationfitcom slash coaching.
Yes.

Jordan (00:14):
And it's essentially about dealing with negativity in
the workplace.
So Vanessa is going to start byreading the form submission,
this amazing submission.
And, by the way, this personrequested to remain anonymous.
So if you ever do submit acoaching question and it's

(00:36):
personal, this is a really goodone, because obviously it deals
with human beings in ourworkplace.
You can click that littlebutton remain anonymous, and
we'll just make sure that wedon't mention your name.
No one knows where you are inthe world, who you are, anything
about you, but we can stilladdress the concern.

Vanessa (00:52):
Yeah, totally so.
Here's the question.
It says huge fan.
Yes, thank you, thank you.

(01:00):
We love you.

Vanessa (01:02):
I was wondering if you have any recommendations as to
how to deal with others thatlower your vibrations in a
professional setting.
I'm worried that coworkers mayinterpret my strive towards good
vibrations as toxic positivity,which can result in being met
with passive aggressiveness.
As a new nurse in my field andonly two years out of school, it
can be hard to gain the respectof older individuals of both

(01:24):
higher and lower educationdegrees.
I try very hard to respect myelders by acknowledging my
novice in the field and askquestions to try to understand
their reasoning, and part of myrole is to question orders
before carrying them out as anurse.
Overall, I love my co-workers.
It's just a select few that canbe difficult to work with

(01:45):
because of how much they affecteveryone's vibration.
In my personal life, mytendency is to try to not
surround myself by people thatbring down my vibration, but how
do you tolerate not feelingrespected by coworkers in this
situation?

Jordan (02:00):
I love this question so much.

Vanessa (02:01):
I know it's so amazing.

Jordan (02:03):
It's very relevant.

Vanessa (02:05):
Yeah right.

Jordan (02:05):
And I actually, before I ran my own business, I was an
employee as an engineer and I'vehad personal experiences that
were very similar to this and Iactually was in oil and gas.
So probably even less of aprofessional environment, so to
speak.
I'll tell some stories on that.
But I think less of aprofessional environment, so to
speak.
I'll tell some stories on that.

(02:26):
But I think this impacts a lotof people and even now, as a
business owner, we're dealingwith clients and we're dealing
with employees.
Yeah, contractors.
Contractors.
So essentially, there are allthese relationships with all

(02:46):
these human beings in all sortsof different professional
settings, whether they'resomebody that you're answering
to or whether they're just apeer in the workplace, but it's
definitely an interestingenvironment.

Vanessa (02:59):
Yeah, when you're at home, you have the choice of who
walks through your front door,but whenever you're in a
professional setting, you don'talways have all of the choice in
who you work with Absolutely.

Jordan (03:12):
And I think that's one of the really big things that
can feel super disempowering inparticular situations,
especially whenever you'refacing.
The negative side of this is ohmy gosh, I have to be around
this person every single day.
Yeah, and there's nothing I cando about that.
They've been here for a longtime, or maybe they're the owner
of the business, or maybethey're the doctor, or maybe

(03:35):
they're a long time nurse.
Whatever it is like they'restuck in there like a hair in a
biscuit.

(03:40):
You know what I?

Jordan (03:41):
mean they're not going anywhere.
So if you've got people thatare stuck in there like a hair
in a biscuit, and you still wantto love your life.
You still want to love yourlife, like how do you go about
dealing with this, and I love itbecause I've definitely been in
that situation before.
So I think the number one thingI want to say is we've got a

(04:01):
really great how-to on this, sowe are going to run through the
meat and potatoes of how to dealwith this situation.

Vanessa (04:10):
So stick with us on this one.

Jordan (04:13):
And they even have numbers like one, two, three,
but we are planned, we are wehave planned this out, but the
reason I was able to plan thisout is I have dealt with this
exact thing before.
Whenever I first started as anengineer, my boss was dealing
with a lot and they had theability to be toxic, very, very

(04:39):
toxic.
In fact.
I remember I lived in a placewhere the phone service was very
spotty and when you're in oiland gas, a lot of times you're
going to like drilling rigs thatare like really far away, and
it wasn't infrequent that Iwould be out of cell phone
service where my phone couldn'tring, and I would come back to a

(05:00):
place where I got phone serviceand I would have one or
multiple voicemails full ofexpletives about where are you?
what are you doing?
You're supposed to be doingthis, but very, very robustly
with all the curse words.
I'm talking f-bombs, like I'mtalking full-on verbal attacks

(05:22):
so like.
So that makes it really fun towake up in the morning like I'm
talking full on verbal attacks.

Vanessa (05:24):
So like.
So that makes it really fun towake up in the morning, so like.

Jordan (05:27):
I would say a little bit of passive aggression would be
wonderful.
Yeah.
Because I was experiencing fullon aggression, aggression.
Yeah.
And your initial response islike dude.
I just want to get away fromthis.
Like I don't want to work withthese people, like I don't want
to deal with this.

(05:55):
You know I want to be in a moreprofessional setting, but the
challenge is if you neverempower yourself to take control
of your own vibration and yourown point of focus in situations
that arise like this, then itdoes not matter where you go, it
does not matter what type ofbusiness you enter into, it does
not matter what type of jobthat you do.
There's never going to be asituation where you are not
dealing with other human beingsin some capacity.

(06:17):
And no matter where you go, nomatter what workplace, no matter
what hospital or what doctoryou would work for, you're going
to run into these situations.
So I think the best thing to dois to figure out a way to
empower yourself in thesituation so that you can deal
with it time and time and timeagain whenever it does arise.

Vanessa (06:42):
Right yeah, and I think the first part of being able to
do that is reminding yourselfthat your intention is for good.

Jordan (06:49):
Yeah.

Vanessa (06:50):
So your intention is not to hurt the other person,
and one of the things that wesay is I would never say or do
anything to intentionally hurtyou.
So, if you remind yourself ofthat, my intention is good here.
I am not malintentioned at all.
I know that they're coming froma point that they, wherever

(07:10):
they're at, but my intentionhere is good.
So whenever you remind yourselfof that, you can take the
pressure off of yourself afteryou have these interactions with
them, no matter how awful theywere to you, and you can say my
intention was for good.

Jordan (07:25):
Yeah, totally.

Vanessa (07:25):
So this wasn't on me.
However, they perceived maybeanything that I said.
That's something that they'redealing with internally.
But that's not something that Ihave to self-reflect on and be
guilty about, or beat myself upabout thinking that, oh,
whatever I said or did made themmad.
It's like no, that's somethingthat they're dealing with

(07:45):
internally, that's nothing youhave to deal with.

Jordan (07:48):
A hundred percent, and actually that's number one of
the framework.
So I think what I'm going to dohere is we're going to go ahead
and get into the framework,because I applied this exact
framework in this exact system Iguess you would say this little
micro system in my workplacewhenever I dealt with this and
it really did transform my lifein a huge way, because from that

(08:13):
point forward, it's not that Iwas never met with negativity,
aggression, passive aggressionagain, but what was cool is I
always had a system to be ableto deal with that, no matter
where I went.

Vanessa (08:25):
Right Because you don't want to feel like you need to
get through the day.
You don't want to feel likethat every single day.
Like oh, I can enjoy my lifewhen I get home at the end of
the day and I'm not around thatperson.

(08:36):
Yeah.

Vanessa (08:37):
Or whenever I'm not on the same shift as them, then
you're putting all of the fun inthe future and you're not
enjoying your present moment.
It's much better to be able toenjoy all of the moments, take
the power back and be able tolike, transform these, these
moments, into what you want themto be.

Jordan (08:56):
Absolutely.
So let's jump into the one, two, three.
So basically, there's a prettysimple one, two, three here.
There's a pretty simple one,two, three here, and then
there's actually a number fourthat is designed for situations
where it's gotten so bad thatyou really feel like you have to
take action to resolve thisrelationship or bring attention
to it or something, so thatone's optional based on your

(09:18):
situation.
Optional, based on yoursituation, but also always after
fully executing on one throughthree, first for a while.
Okay, so the number one of thisone, two, three is remind
yourself of your own intention.
So I know the person whoactually submitted this coaching

(09:41):
form.
I know them to be a very kind,loving, wonderful person, one of
my favorite people on earth,actually.
So I know that her intention inher workplace wouldn't be to
piss anybody off or to make themangry, or to poke the bear or
to stick the key and someinsecurity inside of them and

(10:05):
turn it and be like you knowlike it's not her nature to be
that way.
So number one is remind yourselfof your own intention because,
just like you said, you cannotcontrol what happens in someone
else's mind.
You can't control how they'regoing to perceive a situation or
take a situation, and there area million examples of this.

(10:28):
But essentially, if you say, inthis particular situation, ask
a coworker a question, they havethe choice to choose to
perceive that one of two ways.
They can say they'requestioning my practice, they're
questioning the way I do things, and they can go on a negative
lean, like essentially they canfeel it like an attack, they're

(10:51):
questioning the way that I dothis.
Or they can say, oh, they'requestioning the way that I do
this, that's literally her job.
Number one yeah, it's likenursing 101, to ask what are we
doing and why are we doing it?
So that you don't kill people.
You know, what I mean it's avery important job.

(11:13):
It's a very important part ofthe job to question, like what
is in this thing that I'm aboutto give this person, you know,
like very important part of thejob?

Vanessa (11:24):
What if this person asks, or what if another person
asks in the future what this isor why I'm doing?

Jordan (11:29):
this or how?
Yeah, so part of it isliterally like nursing 101.
It's their job to ask questions, to question the thing that's
being presented to the patient.
Secondly, they're trying tolearn, so, this person being
newly out of school the lastcouple years, they're still very

(11:51):
much in.
How does all this work mode?
and they want to be great attheir job and they really care
about people and they reallywant to be able to help them.
So, at the end of the day, Iknow her intention is really
solid here, but this person inthis scenario has the choice on
how they're going to perceivethat and she can't do anything

(12:11):
about that.
She's never going to be able todo anything about that.
They're always going to be ableto choose one lean or the other
.
Reminding yourself of your ownintention is a way to basically
soften the idea in your own mindof why you might have
instigated something in someoneit's like it's like because

(12:33):
obviously whenever someoneresponds negatively to that, it
can kind of feel like you causedit, like I caused them to have
this negative reaction towardsme, I caused them to be passive,
aggressive, I caused them towhatever.

Vanessa (12:48):
But by reminding yourself that your intention is
good, you can just skip your owninsecurity.

Jordan (12:54):
Yeah, absolutely, which actually brings me to number two
.

Vanessa (12:57):
Which is.

Jordan (12:58):
There's a very powerful framework that I use, and it's
basically every attack is from apoint of insecurity, every time
, 100% of the time.
Generally, the bigger theattack, the bigger the

(13:19):
insecurity.
So sometimes we don't realizeit, but just by asking a simple
question we can essentiallyactivate an insecurity within
someone, something that they'redealing with internally.
Right.
Maybe a mistake that they made along time ago.
So think about this as an idea.

(13:41):
Somebody made a mistake 10years ago.
It's still an insecurity withinthem.
Maybe it had a pretty seriousnegative implication, you know,
and now you ask them a question,it activates an insecurity that
they've been holding on for areally long time.
And now they verbally attackyou or the energy just you just

(14:01):
feel it go cold, or that personstarts to treat you differently
in the workplace, whatever.

Vanessa (14:09):
Right and a lot of times I feel like these things
can happen, subconsciously.

Jordan (14:14):
Totally.

Vanessa (14:14):
So they don't even know that that was there,
necessarily.
So it's not like oh, this isactivating something from 10
years ago and.
I feel really bad about thisnow.
It's just, this is how theirpsyche has like developed this
into a pattern.

Jordan (14:29):
A hundred percent Like what's the vibrational?
Pattern.
How many people out of ahundred right now are the
conscious creator of theirreality?
5% 5% yeah, so five out of ahundred people.
Yeah.
So 95 out of a hundred peoplearen't doing that.
So the likelihood thatsomeone's going to say, wow.

(14:47):
I am aware I feel, I feel kind of bad right now.

Jordan (14:50):
It seems that this person has activated an
insecurity within me and I feelthe need to attack her, but
since I know from my emotionalguidance system that that's not
in harmony with who I am, I'mnot going to do that and I'm
going to act differently.
It's basically what neverhappens with 95% of the

(15:14):
population.

Vanessa (15:16):
Most people never so most people never.

Jordan (15:18):
And even the conscious creators still we have to check
ourselves all the time from likeI bark at my children like a
dog.
Yeah, I growl at them like abear when they activate an
insecurity within me and I wouldconsider myself the conscious
creator of my reality.
So I'm just saying every attackin all forms is from a point of

(15:40):
insecurity, whether it'spassive aggression, aggression,
aggression, whatever.

Vanessa (15:44):
At all forms, at all ages.
Yeah, like from little tinytoddlers to elderly, like all
ages.

Jordan (15:51):
Absolutely so I do want to mention one of the solutions
around this framework thatactually is going to help with a
piece of her question, which isessentially being concerned
about positive like basicallytoxic positivity is a is a new
term it's basically like goodvibes, only good vibes only.

(16:15):
But there is a very farreaching side of toxic
positivity where essentially youjust won't allow yourself to
like engage any idea thatdoesn't make you feel good and
like whatever.
Yeah, kind of out of fear, youknow.

Vanessa (16:34):
Yeah, to me it kind of implies that you're not allowing
yourself to feel your emotions.
Yeah, like you're putting on afacade that you're only positive
all the time.

(16:46):
Yes, which?

Vanessa (16:46):
isn't true.
Like nobody's positive all thetime.

Jordan (16:49):
No, like your emotional guidance system would have to be
broken.

Vanessa (16:52):
Yeah, for that to happen, and that's just not
going to happen Like you'regoing to roll through your day.

Jordan (16:57):
You're going to be experiencing highs and lows.
You're going to be experiencingnegative emotion whenever
you're focused in ways thatsource isn't joining you in, and
you're going to feel positiveemotion when you're focused in
ways that source is also focusedin that way.
Right and that's always goingto be the case, for all time,
forever.
Yeah.
So, inside of this framework,what I like to do is, sometimes

(17:21):
I will remind myself of thiswhole toxic positivity thing and
if you've had an experiencewhere someone doesn't take it
well, because what we have atendency to do when we're the
conscious creator of our realityis we reframe things in our
mind all the time.

Vanessa (17:34):
Right, we're always coming up with frameworks that
make us feel better.

Jordan (17:38):
Precisely so if somebody comes out of their mouth with
something negative with somelean on something and they don't
even realize that it's aperspective that they're
choosing.

Vanessa (17:50):
Yeah, have you ever like woken up and it's a
beautiful day outside and it'slike, oh look, it's actually
really nice out, it would be agreat day to take a bike ride?
And the other person's likelike F this global warming
Totally.

Jordan (18:06):
It's like whoa bro Like let's slow down a little bit.

(18:10):
Like, let's reframe this Can we?

Jordan (18:12):
It's nice.

Vanessa (18:14):
Can we take a deep breath?

(18:15):
Yeah, Namaste bro, namaste lady.

Jordan (18:19):
Like chill, lighten me, she's a lighten you, it's all
good, but now that person is notin vibrational harmony with the
positive reframe that you aredoing in your mind to yield to
them.
So what happens a lot is, we'llkind of do this reframe for
ourselves to make ourselves feelbetter.
Yeah.

Vanessa (18:43):
But then we'll voice it and then the other person takes
out their thor hammer and triesto obliterate

Jordan (18:51):
it's like this is not toxic positivity, this is just
positivity yeah this is mereframing what you just said.
That was negative in a way thatmakes me feel better.
But now I've turned the icepick of pain in you a little bit
harder, because now it's likeessentially every attack is from

(19:15):
a point of insecurity.
So a lot of times this thingwill come out it came from a
point of insecurity.
Now we try to reframe it, sendit back to the person, thinking
that we're like trying to helpthem, but they're in vibrational
harmony with the thing thatjust came out of their mouth.

Vanessa (19:27):
So they send it back?
Yeah, so it's like I'm rubber,you're glue.

Jordan (19:30):
Whatever you say bounces off me and back on you.
It's like.
Well, in this case, that's good, because I'm like.

Vanessa (19:36):
I'm sending out good vibes.

Jordan (19:37):
I'm sending out good vibes, so I'm going to be
getting good vibes back, but theperson just doesn't have the
ability to internalize it.
So a lot of times what it'll dois it will aggravate the
situation and then they'll takeit to another level, essentially
like exacerbating exacerbatetheir vibration exactly, and but
now almost feeling the need toattack you to prove the point of

(20:00):
like what, so it's like.
Wait, I brought you this level,you brought me that level.
Well, now I'm gonna go upanother level so that I can show
you how shitty the worldactually is.
I've been here a lot longerthan you and I've been doing
this a lot longer than you, andyou're just out of school and
you'll learn one day, littlemissy, how freaking horrible

(20:21):
everything is, because I've beenaround.

Vanessa (20:24):
It's like holy crap man I'm like wait, if there was a
button, I pushed it you nailedit and that's what happens.

Jordan (20:34):
Like we're, we're inadvertently pushing people's
insecurity buttons.
Yeah I love that when I was akid.
We don't even know where theyare.
When I was a kid, my sistersknew where my insecurity buttons
were and they would press themon purpose.
Girly man was one of theirfavorites.

(20:55):
Jordan's a girly man.
Girly man, girly man.

Jordan (21:04):
Look what Jordan did Exactly exactly, it was awesome
daddy jordan's having a tempertantrum it was awesome they're,
they're really good at it.
So, anyway, I've had my buttonspressed yeah we're
inadvertently pressing otherpeople's buttons.
So here's a tool inside of thisframework number two.
I created this phrase and itbasically says I see how you

(21:29):
could see it that way andessentially what you're telling
yourself in your own mind isbased on their vibrational
offering right now and thethoughts that they have access
to based on that vibration andtheir lean.

Vanessa (21:43):
And knowing every attack is from a point of
insecurity.
And knowing every attack isfrom a point of insecurity.

Jordan (21:46):
And knowing every attack is from a point of insecurity.
I can see how they would speakthat into existence.
I can see from my point ofunderstanding, like why they
would do that, how they would dothat, whether you would engage
in that idea or not, whether youwant to put that negative

(22:06):
expectation into the universe ornot you know, like they are.
You can still see why they'redoing it.
And no one operatesinappropriately given their
model of the world.
Right.
So no one says things that areinappropriate given their model
of the world.
So I think this whole framework, essentially what we're trying

(22:27):
to get across in point numbertwo, is giving you the tools
that you need essentially tohave some compassion in a way,
some definitely justunderstanding that that person
is just operating from theirmodel of the world, speaking

(22:48):
things into existence from theirvibrational offering that's
dominant, operating from theirown dominant thought processes.

Vanessa (22:54):
And when you understand how these things are working
vibrationally, when youunderstand that they're just
operating below the green lineand you know when you're below
the green line that's painful,totally so when you understand
that they're just pinchingthemselves off from their own
source and they're experiencingpain as a result, they may not

(23:16):
know that, they may not beconscious, they may not be the
conscious creator of theirreality, and so they're living
below the green line and they'refeeling the emotions associated
with that.
So whenever you bring that backto your awareness, it's a lot
easier to have compassion forthem, in my opinion.

Jordan (23:33):
Oh, absolutely Like insecurity, unworthiness, guilt,
all that stuff lives down therein a similar vibrational range.
Yeah.
And every attack is from apoint of insecurity.
So naturally if someone isliving down there, then their
natural response is attack,blame, these things, and what

(23:56):
they don't realize is they'rejust reaching to feel a little
bit better.
Right and it's easier for them,at least in their own mind,
their own construction, toattack this new nurse, right,
it's easier to be like, well,I've been here for a long time,
you haven't.
It's easier for me to blame youfor pushing my insecurity

(24:18):
button.
It's easier for me to bepassive, aggressive, be a jerk
right, to claim a little bit ofempowerment.
It's a little bit easier toattack them than it is for me to
clean up this vibration, whichobviously they're not thinking
that way because they're one ofthe 95 out of 100 that is not
the conscious creator of theirreality.
But you know what I'm saying?

(24:39):
Essentially, it's easier for meto feel a little bit better by
attacking this person than it isto resolve this thing that I've
had going on for decades.

Vanessa (24:47):
Yeah, we don't talk about that.
We don't want to get to thebottom of that.
No, we don't talk about Bruno,I'm just curious Like where does
passive aggressiveness live onthe emotional guidance scale?
Passive aggressive, we have itright here.

Jordan (25:00):
Oh, it's definitely like an attack right.
So I would say it's kind of inblame.

Vanessa (25:05):
Yeah, so that's emotion 15.
A little bit of blame a littlebit of revenge.
Yeah.

Jordan (25:10):
Like I'm feeling vengeful.
So it kind of goes like hatredrage goes into revenge, because
it feels a little bit moreempowering to want to stab back
at somebody than it does to feellike the rage.
Right.
So that's where a lot of thisis and then up to blame, and

(25:30):
then from revenge it goes toanger, because anger just being
angry feels better than wantingto stab someone.

(25:37):
Yeah.

Jordan (25:39):
Like verbally you know, verbally or whatever, and then
discouragement feels a littlebit better than anger, and then
blame feels better thandiscouragement.
So I would say it livessomewhere in that world, any
sort of passive aggression,verbal attack, nonverbal attack.
But it's very clear that you'retrying to make me aware that

(26:03):
you disapprove of what I justsaid or what I just asked you,
or like.
I'm not five.

Vanessa (26:09):
Message received.
Yeah, message received.
You know, I got it.
Return to sender.

Jordan (26:14):
Yeah, I get it, you don't dig what just went down
Like, honestly, we could isolatethe incident incident.
You could just maybe be a dickfor the next 45 seconds or so,
but maybe not the next 45 days.
That'd be super, you know.
But from what I've heard in alot of these workplace settings
especially like these workplaces, where you know there are a lot

(26:34):
of people, there's a lot of mixand you know there are a lot of
high stress situations, yeahthink about that.
You got all these people livingin this high-stress situation,
especially in medical.

Vanessa (26:46):
You see, true colors come out.

Jordan (26:48):
Absolutely.
It's just sort of destined forall of these insecurities to pop
up and all these things thatplay themselves out.
So I would say, inside of thatframework, the verbal outward
thing that you can actually sayout of your mouth is the I can
see how you would see it thatway, or, oh, that's a really

(27:10):
interesting viewpoint.

Vanessa (27:11):
So you're not agreeing with them?
You're not disagreeing withthem.
You nailed it.

Jordan (27:14):
It's not that you don't have to agree with them to say I
can see how you would perceiveit that way, given your model of
the world, and I'm super weird.
So I have to like, not say likethings in these ways, like like
cause if I was to actually sayit like, say some, say you say
something to someone youaccidentally push an insecurity

(27:38):
button, they attack.
It would actually soundsomething like this oh, you're
attacking me right now.
You know every attack is from apoint of insecurity.

Vanessa (27:51):
What's yours?

Jordan (27:52):
Every time.
So you've got something deepdown within, that's active
within you.

Vanessa (27:58):
Let's talk about this.

Jordan (27:59):
That hurts really badly for you, so badly that you're
going to like level nine dickeryright now in attack of me.
But here's the thing.
No one behaves inappropriately.
Given their model of the world,and.
I know and can see within younamaste that this is just coming

(28:26):
from a point of insecurity.
So here's the thing.
I can see how you would see itthat way, friend, and it doesn't
hurt my feelings, because hurtpeople, hurt people and you're
just hurt, okay.

Vanessa (28:45):
Well then you probably never have to see them again,
because they would always runaway from you when they saw you
100%.
So that might be the best way,that might be the best route to
go.
You know what?

Jordan (28:58):
You could do the whole thing verbally, like I just did,
and it would become so awkwardthat they would just avoid you.

Vanessa (29:04):
All the time, forever.
This is a great plan.

(29:06):
Yeah, I didn't even think about that.

Jordan (29:08):
You need to just bring it to an awkward level so high
that they avoid you.

Vanessa (29:14):
This makes me think of that episode of Friends with
Bruce Willis.
Ross was dating Bruce Willis'daughter in the show and then
rachel starts dating brucewillis and he's like kind of a
dick to ross.
And then eventually she she'slike you, never talk about any
of your feelings and then he, hesays that she opened the

(29:36):
floodgates and he just startscrying about everything in his
life starting when he was likethree years old.
Totally.
So it's like what if thesethings actually work that way,
like?
I see these things in you.
Let's talk about them.

Jordan (29:49):
Yeah, 100%.
So I really do feel like thisis very helpful.
Yes, when you can perceive itthat way, that Bruce Willis
inside just wants to cry,they're in there.
There there's a lot of painactive within this person.
There's an insecurity, and thething is you're never going to
know what that is.

(30:09):
You're never going to be ableto resolve that.
That person may not even knowwhat that insecurity is and
they're certainly not going homedoing vibrational work to try
to clean up their life and theirdominant point of attraction.

Vanessa (30:23):
And even if you try to go there with them, they will
not meet you in the middle.
Don't do it.
Yeah, just don't try.

Jordan (30:28):
Word of advice Don't try to take the unconscious humans
up the vibrational ladder untilthey like expressly request it
yeah.
It's not going to be met well.

Vanessa (30:45):
Yeah, no, and I can say , like it's so important to
acknowledge how you show up andbe aware of that and ensure that
you're not lowering yourvibration to meet them where
they're at, because it's notgoing to help them.
Yeah, then they're below thegreen line, feeling unhappy, and
Then they're below the greenline, feeling unhappy and you're
also below the green line,feeling unhappy.

Jordan (31:05):
Absolutely.

Vanessa (31:06):
And then there's no influence down there and it
really doesn't feel good foranyone.

Jordan (31:10):
Totally so.

Vanessa (31:11):
I've had to do that a lot with myself because I feel
like I've been an empath a lotof my life and I've heard that
once you are an empath, you'realways an empath.
Yeah, I've heard that once youare an empath, you're always an
empath, so it's like being awareof how you feel around other
people and not changing yourvibration to meet other people's
vibration, to make them feelbetter, because that's not

(31:32):
possible.

Jordan (31:33):
Definitely.
I feel like you nailed that,like I love the idea of you
don't have to go there with them, right, a lot of times,
whenever we're trying to connectwith people, we have a tendency
to sort of go where they go,sort of like mirroring.
You know, like somebody willsay something and then you're

(31:55):
trying to develop rapport soyou'll say something that
matches it, to try to make theconnection you know, what I mean
and and we feel kind of thispressure to do that and then
this person goes I like thatperson because they think, like
I think, they said somethingsimilarly vibrating to what I
just said yeah in vibrationalharmony with me, like like I,

(32:17):
like this person.
That's kind of how you knowthese interactions work, but
your vibration really suffers,right?
So just like I, like thisperson.
That's kind of how you knowthese interactions work, but
your vibration really suffers,right?
So, just like she said, likehow do you be around low vibe
people whenever you're trying tolive a high vibe life?
And I think that's one of themost important parts is you
don't have to go there with themto develop a connection with
them.

Vanessa (32:36):
I think that's why your framework like I can see how
you would feel that way.
It's not.
I can see how you would feelthat way.
It's not.
I can see how you would feelthat way and I'm going to feel
that way too Correct.

Jordan (32:46):
Yeah, you don't have to do the.
I feel that I'm going to feelthat way too, so that you and I
can bond and we can cry togetheron our pillows at night.
It's like, don't go there, LikeI can see how you would see it
that way.
Yeah.
And when you can do that andyou sort of like give yourself
permission to not go there, whatyou're doing is you're
acknowledging that person andyou're appreciating something

(33:11):
about them and you're saying itoutwardly in a way that does not
press the insecurity buttonRight.
Right.
That does not press theinsecurity button.
Right, right, and essentiallyyou're just giving yourself
permission to not engage thevibration at the same time that
you closed the loop of whateverthey just did and said Right.

Vanessa (33:31):
Something I've been doing too.
With situations like that, likeif somebody says something and
I take it maybe as an insecurity, like I adopt that as an
insecurity myself, or it pushesan insecurity button within me I
, instead of allowing the mentalchatter to start and like
brooding on all of the thedifferent thought loops that can

(33:54):
occur around whateverinsecurity they pushed in me, I
usually give myself space, Iback away from the situation and
I remind myself nothing's moreimportant than that.
I feel good.

Jordan (34:07):
Right.

Vanessa (34:07):
So I'm going to choose to feel good and if, focusing on
this thing whether it'ssomething they said or it's
something I said and I'mthinking about the way that they
might have perceived it If theway that I'm thinking about it
doesn't feel good, then I backaway from it, give myself space
and I ask myself what does makeme feel good and if it, if I

(34:29):
can't find a way to feel goodabout whatever it is, then I
move on to something else.

Jordan (34:34):
Yeah, absolutely.
I mean just reminding yourselfthat there's nothing more
important, that I feel good.
Yeah because all my influenceand power is from above.
The green line.
Right.
So, however, I can look at thisin a way that keeps me above
the green line, is where the winis Right.
So, finalizing the one, two,three.

(34:54):
So now there's the what happensafter the interaction.
There's the what happens afterthe interaction when you go your
separate ways, but you're stillexperiencing the Angst.
Angst like this, whatever thatwould be called the
heebie-jeebies yeah, theheebie-jeebies.
You're still experiencing likethe negativity from the

(35:15):
situation where it's like, ohman, I still kind of feel like
dumb.
I need to take a shower, Can Iget?

Vanessa (35:21):
Yeah.

Jordan (35:22):
Can I gargle something?
Like, can I get this out of mymouth?
Can I get it?

Vanessa (35:27):
out of my.

Jordan (35:27):
Yeah, Like I just got to get this off me, right.

Vanessa (35:29):
I need a vibrational cleanse, yeah.

Jordan (35:31):
Like literally, can I go take like some sort of a
vibrational footpath and getthis off of me you know what I'm
saying?

Vanessa (35:37):
bring out the smudge.
We've all experienced that.

(35:39):
Yeah, I need all the oils, something yeah, it's like you.

Jordan (35:47):
it's funny with spiritual people, like sometimes
we actually have friends thathave this like bag of
concoctions and they'll have anexperience like this and then
all of a sudden you'll see themlike pulling all these crazy
things, like like there will bea crystal.
They'll get the crystal out andbe like ooh, and then they'll
pull out something that smellsgood.

(36:09):
And then they're like got these little rollerball things.

Jordan (36:10):
They'll pull it out and be like shh shh, shh shh.
They're like rubbing it onthemselves.
They take their shoes off andthey're putting it on the bottom
of their feet Yuck.
Then the incense and the lightercomes out, yeah, smudge sticks,
yeah, yeah, spreading theenergy do you have a lighter by
chance?
I got, I got one.
Let me just like a bunsen burnerthey're like fighting the

(36:34):
incense you're like what thatwas on your back like you were
really ready for this moment.
You know, like you're ready forthe situation like so, uh,
anyway, that was kind of adetour, but it's pretty funny
like we've all felt that wayright?
So yeah, what happens after youleave is this is gonna marinate
and it's gonna replay over andover, and, over and over again

(36:57):
in your mind because technicallythis was like emotionally
traumatic for you.
Yeah.
If you think about it, that'ssort of what the brain is
designed to do is wheneversomething has a large emotional
response, it has a tendency toremember it.

Vanessa (37:13):
And that's what we identify as trauma.
Right, that's what we define astrauma is just some, a
situation or an experience thathad a lot of emotional charge
around it.

Jordan (37:22):
Yeah, absolutely Unchecked.
You're just going to continueto activate that way that you
felt over and over and over andover and over and over again.
And then you're going to leavework and you're going to think
about that interaction again,over and over and over, and then
you're going to approach goingto bed and then you're like, oh
God, I got to go to bed whereI'm going to have to wake up,
and then I'm going to have to goback to work where I'm going to

(37:43):
encounter that person again.

Vanessa (37:46):
Yeah, and pick up in that same vibration that you
left.

Jordan (37:49):
Totally and then.
So now you've got this anxietygoing and the challenge with
that is that now you'reactivating that vibration from
that point all the way to thenext time you're going to go to
work again.

Vanessa (38:03):
Yeah.
And the unwanted vibration.

Jordan (38:06):
Exactly, and you are the conscious creator of your
reality.
You do have the ability toshift your own vibration within,
regardless of what's going onwithout.
Most people don't have thetraining to be able to do it,
but we're providing it.

Vanessa (38:21):
Yeah, here's the how to .
So, this part's really fun.

Jordan (38:24):
This is a really fun thing to do.
So essentially, you now get tofocus.
So step three is focus.
So I'm going to do a weirdexercise here here, just to
basically like bring this pointhome, but take a person that a

(38:46):
lot of people know.

Vanessa (38:47):
So let's just take a very well-known actor, pick a
very well-known actor let's saywhat's his name the one that we,
the funny one that's in all ofthere are eight billion people
in the world I can't think of alot of them are famous okay the
rock, the rock duane the rockjohnson okay so most of the

(39:11):
people listening to thisprobably know duane the rock
johnson.

Jordan (39:15):
So for everyone listening to this, I want you to
think about Dwayne the RockJohnson wearing a pink dress.
I think he actually did that inthe.

Vanessa (39:26):
Tooth Fairy movie.

Jordan (39:28):
Yeah, he probably has Guy's been around a while.
He's done a lot of really coolstuff.
Now I want you to think abouthim sitting down in a blue chair
and pulling that blue chair upto a walnut desk and I want you
to imagine him looking acrossthat desk at you smiling really

(39:50):
big with that big old Dwayne theRock Johnson grin, and he's
just cheesing at you in his pinkdress, sitting in his blue
chair at a walnut desk.
The reason that I wanted to havethis little interaction is
every single person that waslistening to this if they
engaged in that, had the abilityto do that, and they have some

(40:14):
picture in their mind.
It's not going to be exactlythe same as mine, it's not going
to be exactly the same as yours.
His mind it's not going to beexactly the same as yours, but
it is going to be a picture intheir mind of Dwayne Johnson
sitting in a pink dress, in ablue chair, at a walnut desk,
smiling right.
Yeah.
You own your mind 100%, all thetime.

(40:40):
All the time no one can look inthere and see what's going on in
there.
Yeah, there's no peak holes.

Vanessa (40:46):
There are no peak holes .

Jordan (40:48):
And this nurse probably knows you can't look in the ears
and see what somebody'sthinking about.
It's like the closest thing toa hole in your head the fact
that you own your focus is themost empowering thing in the
universe, because you can thinkabout anyone any way that you

(41:09):
choose to think about them, andyou can activate within you the
corresponding vibration and youcan work your way into a
vibrational match with yoursource and feel good.

Vanessa (41:27):
The way that your source sees that person.

Jordan (41:29):
Exactly and you just nailed it.
When you're focused on a personin a way that your source is
not focused on them, that's whatmakes you feel bad.
When the infinite part of yourconsciousness sees the light in
this person, knows they're thephysical extension of infinite
energy, knows what they trulyare and knows that that attack

(41:51):
came from a point of insecurityand pain and you choose to focus
on them in a way that'sdifferent from the way that
source is going to perceive them, which is always unconditional
love.

Vanessa (42:07):
Because we're all source energy.

Jordan (42:09):
We're all source energy.
We all have deep withininfinite source energy.
We are the physical projectionof infinite source energy and
that infinite source energy isalways going to be projecting
unconditional love toward thatperson.
So the closer that you canmatch unconditional love, the
closer you're going to be toyour source.

(42:29):
The closer you are to yoursource and your focus and your
perspective, the better you'regoing to feel.
And that's why, no matter whoit is, no matter what the
situation, there is a way thatyou can focus on that person.
That's going to feel good,especially if you're operating
inside of some of theseframeworks of reminding yourself
of your own intention and whoyou really are, reminding

(42:51):
yourself of, who they really are, reminding yourself that every
attack is from a point ofinsecurity and they're just
feeling pain.
If they're going to engage inthat and having a little bit of
compassion, that gets you closerto that unconditional love
which frees you to feel better.
So, this last focus exercise ofthe one, two, three is what I

(43:16):
would give a person who was like.
I have a specific person thatI'm dealing with in my workplace
that is consistently showing upto me a certain way and it's
very uncomfortable.
How do I deal with that person?
For the next two weeks, I wantyou to do an exercise.

Vanessa (43:35):
We call this vibrational anchoring.

Jordan (43:37):
We call this vibrational anchoring.
This is really good andbasically what I want you to do
is just take every opportunityin physicality, whenever you're
interacting with this person, toseek out and find things about
them that you appreciate, thatyou can focus on in a way that

(43:59):
make you feel good.

Vanessa (44:00):
Have you ever seen them smile?
Have you ever heard them laugh?
Think about those things.

Jordan (44:05):
Think about their jewelry Make those your
vibrational anchors.
Think about their clothing.

Vanessa (44:09):
Yeah, think about their family.

Jordan (44:10):
Think about their family , think about their hair.
Think about anything about thatperson that you can really find
and appreciate, and in thebeginning this can be kind of
hard.

Vanessa (44:23):
Sometimes I even think of people whenever they were a
little kid.

Jordan (44:26):
That's a good one.

Vanessa (44:27):
And that helps me a lot , because then you can almost
put yourself as the same agewhen you're a little kid and
they're a little kid and you'rejust having a conversation,
because when you go to a parkthere really a lot of times are
no enemies with kids, they'rejust like kids, let's play.

(44:45):
It's freaking, brian again.

Vanessa (44:48):
Yeah, no, they're just all like so happy and joy filled
.
They're all playing together,so that's an exercise that works
really well for me.
Like here's them as a littlekid.

Jordan (44:58):
Yeah, I actually love that.
How can you?

Vanessa (45:00):
be mad at them now.

Jordan (45:01):
Yeah, so if you can do that, like if you can't find
anything to appreciate in themoment, you can do imaginary
exercises like that and youliterally are going to use your
imagination to craft a newversion of this person in your
mind.
And if you do it as a practice,you're going to start seeing
more and more and more and moreabout this person that you can

(45:23):
appreciate.

Vanessa (45:24):
It is universal law.
The law of attraction willbring you more of what you're
focused on.

Jordan (45:30):
When you get into vibrational harmony with
unconditional love andappreciation, then you're going
to find more opportunities to dothat.
You'll also even find moreopportunities to express that,
express that appreciation ofthat person.
And the more that you focus onit and the more that you express
it, the more you're going tosee of it in your reality.

(45:52):
So I'm going to hit this one,two, three real quick with the
conclusion to my very beginningstory which is I had this
employer that was basicallyverbally assaulting me whenever
I started working, you know, andI would be out of phone service
and I would come back to thesereally nasty voicemails.

(46:13):
So I came up with an exercisepersonally, because I was
studying this vibrational stuffback then and I wasn't about to
have a job where my life suckedevery day.
And the person I reported towas a total jerk to me.

(46:28):
Yeah.

Jordan (46:28):
Forever, Forever, so I found a handful of things that I
really appreciated about thatperson, and for me it was their
smile.
They had a big beaming smilewhenever they smiled.
They also had a roaring laughwhen they left.
So I really honed in on thatsmile and that laugh and I saw a

(46:56):
lot of instances where theyreally were trying to help
people.
A lot of times they just feltreally insecure about running
the business or like what wasgoing on the problems because
ultimately they had to solve allthe business problems at that
level to make it safe foreveryone down there.

Vanessa (47:14):
So they had a lot of weight on their shoulders.

Jordan (47:15):
They had a lot of weight on their shoulders.
So I just saw them caring and Ijust saw them caring and I saw
the smile and I saw the laughterand I just conditioned myself
to not focus on that stuff atall.
I know not everybody can dothis, but I took it so extreme
that if I saw a voicemail comein I would sort of peek at the

(47:39):
content and if it was just anfull on attack I wouldn't even
listen to it, I would justdelete it.
I've received emails like thatand if I see that it's just a
full on attack, it's like youknow what?
I don't even have to engage thatdelete, and some people might
be like Jordan.
That's crazy.
You can't just like deleteemails from your employer
whenever they're attacking you.

(47:59):
It's like, well, if it's just afull on attack and that's just
the point of it, then I don'thave to engage that you don't
have the opportunity to attackme when I get to the office or
someone else or someone else,it's all good.
Like it'll work itself outWithin hours of really making
that decision.
Now, you do have to make thatdecision because otherwise

(48:23):
you're just going to migrateback to the vibration that
you've had going on, which isalready active on the subject,
which is already active aroundthat person.

Vanessa (48:31):
That's why we call it vibrational anchoring, because
you set your anchor there andevery time that situation or
that person or that topic comesup, you go back to where you set
that anchor Totally, and peopleare vibrationally anchoring all
the time.
Yeah.

Jordan (48:44):
They're just not doing it intentionally, right, they're
just letting the anchor fallwhere it falls and then they're
saying I feel that way aboutthat person because that's the
way that person is.
And it's like, actually that'sthe version of that person that
you have in your mind.
I bet let's just say that thatperson, one of these people,
goes and takes their nephew outto lunch.

(49:09):
Do you think that person isthat way with their
five-year-old nephew whenthey're out to lunch?
Right, probably not.
You know what I mean so yeah,it's like they're not that way.

(49:20):
It's like.

Jordan (49:21):
That's the image that you have in your mind.
So the intention here is torebuild this person's identity
in your mind.
So before we get to the actioncomponent, the very final piece,
I would say run one throughthree as many times as you can,
and what we're looking for iscreate a new point of focus

(49:43):
within this person's identity inyour mind.
You're going to create a newvibrational anchor and you're
just going to keep compoundingon it.
Think about them smiling,thinking about them laughing,
think about everything you canappreciate about them.
Find everything that you canappreciate about them.
Whenever something comes in,it's like this person was like
this.
Find everything that you canappreciate about them.
Whenever something comes in,it's like this person was like
this.
Just be like thanks, but nothanks.
I'm not engaging that.
Disengage.

(50:03):
Engage what you're anchoring,even whenever they show up as
Tom Dickery, you know andthey're just like being what
they've been for the past coupleweeks.
Whatever, you have the abilityto disassociate yourself from
that version of them.
Run yourself through thisprocess and when you're done

(50:27):
with the interaction, even if itwas exactly the same as before,
you can reorient and refocus.
And what we're looking for hereis to essentially rebuild the
identity of the person in yourown mind, and then you're going
to run that through activationcycles.
An activation cycle isessentially a period of 17
seconds times four At leastthat's how I run it in my own

(50:50):
mind.
But essentially in 17 secondsthat thought has enough energy
in your mind to attract thoughtsthat are similar to it.
So now just thoughts that aresimilar.
Another 17 seconds you're goingto now be moving in the
direction of where you want togo.
The third set of 17 secondsyou're really starting to pick

(51:11):
up momentum.
And the fourth set of 17 secondsroundabout.
You'll find that there's sortof like these different thought
loops that start to getactivated and you start to go
there.
After 68 seconds the universebasically has a bead Think about
like a tower with like a bigred light on top, like bing,
bing, bing.
The universe now has a bead onyour vibration, to where you're

(51:34):
actually materially manifestingexperiences that are in harmony
with this new active vibrationthat you've got going on within
you.
So the more activation cyclesyou can run on the new identity,
the more in harmony with thatyou're going to be.

(51:54):
And whether this person changesor doesn't change, the
remarkable thing is how theywill start showing up
differently to you.

Vanessa (52:04):
And that's only a little over a minute.
Totally so you think about therequirement there like the work,
the how-to.
Like I have to focusintentionally for a little over
a minute, that's really not thatcrazy and I think that's why a?
Lot of people don't do it.
One they don't know what to do,but two they think that sounds
too easy.

Jordan (52:23):
Absolutely.
And if you're in a situationwhere you're activating that,
then you're giving yourself thegift of not going down one of
those negative thought loopswhere you now are going to be
experiencing pain for the next30, 45 minutes an hour as you

(52:46):
play that situation back in yourmind again and again and again.
And we all do this, we all dothis All the time.
If we don't check the vibration, then that vibration is active
within you and you're just goingto attract more thought and
more momentum.

Vanessa (53:02):
And more manifestations , and more manifestations on
that vibration.

Jordan (53:07):
So if you can take the opportunity to just be like you
know what, Setting my anchor.
Setting my anchor, I'm focusedon this person in this way and
I'm not going there right now.
Yeah.
Then you're basically going toavoid those negative thought
loops and you're going to behigh vibing in your own mind.
And now the universe mustrespond with experiences, ideas,

(53:32):
thoughts that are in harmonywith your vibration.
It's just universal law.
So you're giving yourself thegift, in all these scenarios, of
vibrating in harmony with yourown source.
You're not making a notebook ofall their positive qualities
and giving it to them.
It's not for them.
Yeah.

(53:52):
They may be a dick the rest oftheir life.
They may die, and at theirfuneral all these people are
going to be talking about what adick they were, you know.
I mean just saying, I'm notsaying that this person is going
to change fundamentally,necessarily.
But if you're not invibrational harmony with that
version of them, you'll beamazed how often that person

(54:14):
will start to show up to youdifferently.

Vanessa (54:16):
Right, or they just won't show up at all.
Like whenever you're in thesame area as them, maybe they're
in the bathroom, and thenwhenever they're back, you have
to go to the bathroom.
Or you're eating lunch andthey're off doing rounds, or
whatever it is.
It's like you'll be amazed athow many times you just miss
each other if you're not invibrational harmony.

Jordan (54:34):
And so in my workplace example, that's exactly what
happened to me.
I just anchored in on this newversion of them and then, I just
found more and more and more toappreciate and more and more
and more opportunities to seethem in a way that was in
harmony with my source.
Right.
And really I'd say within hours,things were starting to soften,

(54:55):
were starting to soften withindays, a couple days.
I was basically doing that sortof navigation of time where
they would be in the office andI would be out of the office, or
I would be in the office andthey would be somewhere else, if
we were in differentvibrational places.
But then when you guys did cometogether, but then, whenever we

(55:18):
did come together, I got thatversion of them.
Wow, like the smiling, thesmiling laughter caring, wow,
like basically like I wasbrought into a whole different
world almost, uh, around thisperson where it was just like
who are you?
You're so much different thanyou were whenever I first came

(55:41):
on, and I remember thatexperience inherently because it
completely transformed my workenvironment.
I was able to work there foryears and do really well and
enjoy my life and enjoy you knowworking with this person and it
all was stemmed originally frommy point of focus.

Vanessa (56:03):
So this exercise works with everybody your spouse, your
partner, your kids.

Jordan (56:08):
Yeah, not just in the workplace, yeah.

Vanessa (56:10):
Wherever you're at anytime you're engaging with
other people.

Jordan (56:13):
Totally so.
To wrap this up, I do want togive a number four, which is
what happens when this hasgotten just so bad that you've
tried one through three for twoweeks.
Try one through three for atleast two weeks before you go to
number four.

(56:34):
Okay, yeah.
Because, like I said, you'll beamazed at how this person will
start to show up differently toyou or these people.
But if you do have to takeaction, do it in the frame of
one, two, three, which is youbasically want to tell that

(56:58):
person something about yourintention, right?
And you want to use thatframework that we talked about
being able to see things the waythat they see things, and you
want to tell them a little bitabout your focus on them and how
you see them, right?
So, say, someone just continuesto attack you in the workplace.

(57:20):
At some point, if one, two,three doesn't just clean up the
vibration and clean up yourworld, you can put your foot
down.
But the way that you put yourfoot down is not fire with fire,
not an attack back to an attack, but unconditional love back in
this form.
So essentially it would soundsomething like this hey, listen,

(57:43):
I'm picking up what you'rethrowing down.
I feel like you're angry withme.
I've seen the passiveaggression.
I know I'm not unaware thatyou're unhappy with me and the
things that I've said or done,but I just want you to know that
it's never my intention to makeyou feel bad, like I never do

(58:11):
anything in order to hurt youintentionally.
I'm a nurse.
It's my job to ask questionsand a lot of that is because I
see a lot of value in the waythat you think and your
experience.
You've been a lot, you're a lotlonger than me and I see a lot
of value in that and I want tolearn from that.
Also, it's literally my job toask these questions, so I'm not

(58:33):
asking them in a way that that'squestioning the way that you're
doing things.
I just genuinely want to knowwhat's going on and I really see
you as someone who's awesome,who does your job really well,
that cares, and at this point,if you've done this one through
three for two weeks, you'regoing to have a really solid

(58:54):
anchor on this person of all thethings that you appreciate
about them.

Vanessa (58:57):
You're going to have tons of ideas.

Jordan (58:58):
You're going to have tons of ideas.
You're going to have tons ofideas.
And when you lay a hammer likethis, you lay that hammer.
You don't softly do it, you laythat hammer, you lay that love.
Hammer, you lay that lovehammer baby Woo.
My intention is only good hereyeah.

(59:21):
And I can see how you do thingsand I can totally understand how
you do them and why you do them, and I just want you to know
that this is the way that I seeyou and I just want you to know
that because I felt this I wouldnever say or do anything to
intentionally hurt you.

Vanessa (59:40):
Exactly.
I'm here very curious and noteven just willing, but really
wanting to learn from you.
Yeah.

Jordan (59:49):
And if there's anything I ever do or say that activates
something within you that makesyou, like, want to be passive,
aggressive or just aggressive orignore me or snap at me, then I
would really appreciate youjust telling me honestly what

(01:00:09):
that was, so that I canunderstand it better right if
you do that, after two weeks ofone, two, three, the buck is
pretty much gonna stop thereyeah because now this person's
going to go.
Whoa, I've now like now I haveawareness I've taken this to the

(01:00:31):
point and they're like you saidin the beginning they're not
even aware that they're doing it, but now they're aware that.
And maybe they're aware thatthey're doing it, but they're
not even aware that they'redoing it, but now they're aware
that.

Vanessa (01:00:40):
And maybe they're aware that they're doing it, but
they're not aware that you'reaware that they're being passive
aggressive.
You just nailed it.

Jordan (01:00:46):
Yeah, totally so, it's like so once you do that and you
just make it clear.
I just want to make it clearthat I know I can see that
you're unhappy with me.
I can see that.
Like that I understand, like,like it's not my intention.
Like I understand, like likeit's not my intention.
It's never my intention to doanything to hurt you or make you
feel bad or make you feelinsecure.
It's not my intention here.

(01:01:07):
I can see how you do things inthe world and these are all the
things about you that I reallysuper appreciate.
I just want you to know that,like I'm on your team here.

Vanessa (01:01:16):
The light in me sees the light in you.

Jordan (01:01:19):
Namaste.
And when you do that man likelike, if you have to lay that
hammer, sometimes you just haveto lay that hammer.
But if one, two, three didn'twork for two weeks and then you
lay that, then now it's all outin the air, it's all, it's all
right there.
Yeah.
And now that person, more thanlikely with awareness brought to

(01:01:40):
the situation, is going torespond, so hopefully that helps
.
I really appreciated thisquestion.

Vanessa (01:01:46):
We've all dealt with that.
Yeah, definitely it brought usa lot of clarity and we hope
that it brings you a lot ofclarity as well.
It helps you feel better aboutthe situation.
So with that, we would love tosend love and light to all.