June 1, 2025 • 39 mins
As we conclude the month of May. In honor of Mental Health Awareness Month, Voice4Chefs is proud to rerelease this special episode to spotlight the courageous and inspiring journey of Chef Abbey, whose story sheds light on the challenges—and triumphs—of mental health in the culinary world.
As a young lady, chef Abbey Miller thought she wanted to be a crime investigator. Little did she know she would make it all the way to the CIA... but the delicious one: The Culinary Institute of America. She was the first recipient of the Anthony Bourdain Scholarship from the CIA. Hear what it was like attending the CIA, and listen to Abbey talk about the importance of a healthy culinary culture, mental health, and her realization that there is true nobility in cooking for others when “everyone needs to eat”.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Chef Abbey (00:00):
I will tell this to everyone I crossed paths with
(02:48):
till the day I die is that inorder to make the world go
round, everyone needs to eat,the world cannot live without
very true the restaurant in thefood industry. And the same
thing goes with health care, thehero workers as well. The things
that we can't live without, Ithink are these types of jobs
(03:12):
are definitely one of the mostunder appreciated.
Michael Dugan (03:16):
I was obsessed just like you about food and
then the culture and chef's andI realized that, I wanted to be
a chef, and then went to cookingschool and I basically just
dove in. I didn't care aboutanything else. It just my life
and I collected 66 cookbooks ayear and a half? That's, yeah,
(03:40):
let's see, we didn't have thefood channel back then. We had
cookbooks we had the VHS and Ithink the DVDs are coming along
for me I'm a little older. Ikind of grew up with, I went to
cooking school, I did aninternship or apprenticeship. It
(04:05):
really was because I worked fora country club. I met this
amazing chef , chef Michael. Ican't remember his last name
right now, but he was I thinkFrench Canadian. And it was this
incredible experience I'd neverbeen through before where I just
saw all this food, fine diningfood. I had never seen and I
(04:27):
tasted peanut butter pie andboullibase and halibut. All
these incredible dishes thatcame from all over the world. I
met with a Romanian Baker at thecountry club. I became friends
with them. And he gave me hissecret peanut butter pie recipe.
And that kind of experience isso powerful and then the chef.
(04:51):
Chef Michael took me into thewalk in after about six months
because Michael you are doing agreat job as a prep cook right
as just starting out over prepfood. And I would go home
probably like you did Abby and Iwould take out when it first
learned to saute I took out abag of frozen peas and I put in
a pan and I would flip them inthe air and they would go all
(05:13):
over the floor. And I did thatfor a week and then all of a
sudden they landed in the pan.
So that's how I learned tosaute. That was before cooking
school. And then I would take abag of oranges and I would learn
how to basically filleted themis what my wife calls where you
peel it with a knife and youhave to get the curvature of the
fruit right. You have to knowwhere that curve goes because
(05:35):
you don't want to lose any ofthe fruit. So took a whole bag
of oranges I went over to myparents and I peeled them and
gave them dishes with oranges,orange juice, I use the oranges
up right but it was a practicething to get the skill down. And
the chef knew that I was doingthis. So when I was in the
walk-in and he took me in thewalk-in one day and said I got
(05:56):
some good news and bad news. Thegood news is I want to keep you
the bad news is that I can't payyou. Literally another six
months was an unpaid internshipwhere I almost went broke. And
then I turned to him after ayear and I said I have to go. I
love you. I love what you'vetaught me because he taught me
everything. There were noboundaries anymore. When I was
(06:17):
his apprentice, I could work anystation, right? I could work
alongside people because hewasn't paying me and what I
remember is he hooked me up witha really great French restaurant
and then I did anotherpartnership. Because I was a
prep cook dishwasher eventuallyline cook and I learned all the
intricacies of fine dining,small French restaurant. It's
(06:38):
amazing that you get so hookedon this stuff, but do you make a
decent living wage in thebeginning? No. I mean, that's
that's the real problem. Right?
It's not as valued as it shouldbe. I've had conversations with
Chef Jensen about and that's thereal issue is people need to see
the value of what people in thehospitality are doing.
(07:01):
Especially during the pandemic,they're keeping everybody fed,
right. Whether you go and youdine, or whether you take
takeout they should be honoredand respected and instead people
complain. They complain aboutthe service. I found myself
guilty of doing it once and Iwent, Wait a minute. These
people are working so hard, andthey're short staffed, of course
(07:22):
this service is going to suffer.
But the bottom line is we do itbecause of our passion. We do it
because we're obsessed becauseit's something that we are so
excited about being creative.
Chef Abbey (07:31):
It comes down to not only the people inside the
industry understanding that butthe people outside the industry
having some type of basisknowledge of everything. What
we go through and what we do andwhat it takes to get from the
cutting board to the plate.
Maybe it would help that senseof understanding and compassion
(07:52):
that's needed a little more atrestaurant establishments.
Michael Dugan (07:59):
Can you share a little about your journey now
moving forward in clubhouse,what happened? There? What was
that experience like? Or is thatexperience like?
Chef Abbey (08:08):
Clubhouse started all because of the Anthony
Bourdain scholarship that I hadreceived through the Culinary
Institute of America. It wasn'tuntil submitting those
scholarships sitting behind thedesk at my library job on campus
at 11 o'clock at night, justtyping because I'm tired and
(08:31):
bored. My mom has been buggingme for months to do these
scholarships. And she's likeAbbey, just sit down and do them
they're extra money you don'tknow what you could win and I
was like, fine. And so finallyat the library job for the heck
of it. I'm just gonna sit andwrite. And it wasn't until then
that I discovered my true lovefor writing, describing food
(08:55):
through writing bringing it tolife. So I wrote a lot of the
scholarships and I was fortunateenough to win a lot of them as
well. After graduation. I got intouch with Dan who's a Dean of
Business Management at CIA. Igot in touch with Chef Jensen
and Chef Mimi and the JamesBeard Foundation. And that's
(09:18):
when we all kind of cametogether and did this room
through clubhouse to talk aboutthe process of writing that
scholarship and what was goingthrough my mind and why I wrote
what I did. I was super new toclubhouse. I believe that was my
very first time experiencing theapp and let alone really talking
(09:42):
to that many people at oncebecause that's something I'm not
super familiar with. Chef Mimiafter that took me under her
wing, as well as Chef Jensen. Iworked with them. If over the
past few months and in the clubFood is religion. I am so
fortunate enough to meet so manypeople and how many people I've
(10:06):
connected with that are inCalifornia or in Singapore it's
crazy. Yeah, and it's amazingand it's definitely allowed me
to understand my love for publicspeaking and my love for the
different side of culinarybecause culinary doesn't always
have to be in the kitchen. WhenI graduated from school from
(10:31):
college, I was super unaware ofwhat to do because right when I
graduated that was when COVIDwas going on. I graduated by
sitting in my living roomwatching my speech play on my
TV.
Michael Dugan (10:44):
Yeah my wife was the same she got her master's
degree online.
Chef Abbey (10:48):
Definitely the unexpected type of graduation
and after that I didn't knowwhat to do because that was the
time that I discovered I reallywant to write. I want to get
into the editing and foodphotography and write and bring
stories to life. I had no ideahow to I was super lost and I
(11:14):
was a system manager at thisdesert place in Pittsburgh. At
the time I was living with mysignificant other was working at
this milkshake place and it wasvery, very cool place in
Pittsburgh. I offered to takephotography photos and my
photos, got them published in amagazine for their first time
(11:34):
and that's when I was like, Okayyou can really do this.
Michael Dugan (11:38):
Let's pause and give a shout out to this place.
What's the name?
Chef Abbey (11:42):
The Milkshake factory so yes, it's in many
locations and it was a supersuper fun place to work at. They
actually started as a chocolatefactory that turned into a
milkshake place. I offered justout of my free time. I wanted to
really take photos for them. AndI got a lot of great ones. And
(12:05):
that's when I truly realizedwhere I was most happiest and at
the time though I was stillstruggling with a lot of mental
health issues and just realize Ijust wasn't happy in that type
of work and I was like Abbeyjust get yourself back in the
kitchen you need to be in frontof the heat for a little bit get
(12:25):
back into what you used to do. Iheaded out to Utah to help Stein
Eriksen for their winter season.
I was communicating with one ofmy good friends and chefs at
work at Stein Eriksen and manymonths beforehand so I knew they
needed help. I love that placedefinitely for everything that
it has taught me so I headed outthere. I lived with my best
(12:48):
friend that I met an externalfor a little bit living in Utah.
That's definitely when clubhousesort of exploded for me
definitely when I realized howmuch I loved it and how much I
liked the writing and the publicspeaking. I would be at work in
the kitchen. There is nothingmore that I want to do right now
(13:08):
then go right and go talkin inrooms on clubhouse. The more I
worked with Chef Mimi and themore we got into deeper topics
and the more connections I builtwith you guys. Honestly I look
at food is religion and thepeople that I've met through
clubhouse, I've learned it'smore than just a community it
(13:31):
feels like a family to me. Iremember Michelle Gill, The
Grief Curator talking aboutwanting us all to get together
and I'm like absolutely. If wecan all somehow gather up and
meet we all have opened up insome way or another. It's like
(13:55):
public healing in a way yourhealing with all of these other
people and even the more youtell your story, the less it
hurts and the more it feelsempowering to talk to other
people about it. And that'sdefinitely what I love most
about it.
Michael Dugan (14:14):
And that's that's incredible. A huge shout out to
Chef Mimi and Chef Jensen fromBest Served Podcast. They are
heroes of the hospitalityindustry.
Chef Abbey (14:26):
Oh my gosh, absolutely. Chef Jensen,
alongside doing the AnthonyBourdain podcast through
clubhouse. He had reached out tome one day I have this really
cool thing that I want you to bea part of and it was the 868686
challenge.
Michael Dugan (14:48):
We got to talk about that.
Chef Abbey (14:50):
And he reached out to me and said I know you love
writing and your writing isgreat. I want you to like submit
a piece. And I was likeabsolutely. And I definitely
chose obviously the idea ofoutside life and how to deal
(15:12):
with it while working in thekitchen and that's sort of the
topic I pushed myself towardswhen I sat down and decided to
write and the title of myarticle for that challenge was
The Kitchen A Hell Away FromHell. So everyone's probably
wondering what does that mean?
Michael Dugan (15:31):
Gotta read it.
Chef Abbey (15:33):
Read it. Beginning to finish.
Michael Dugan (15:35):
Yes,
Chef Abbey (15:36):
I will pull it up real quick. It was definitely a
vulnerable point when I sat downto write it and I wasn't , I
didn't understand how manypeople would be reading these
articles until after the fact.
But I think after submitting I'mglad I did that. So I'll start
from the beginning. And it saysgrowing up I struggled with self
(15:59):
love more than anyone could haveever imagined. I was a lion's
roar that wasn't heard. I was aperson based upon her mistakes
and the baggage she carriedbehind her. Nothing else and
nothing more. I dealt with anabusive father more than 40
times in my life, dealt withsexual assault and was
constantly told by those closestto me, it happens to the best of
(16:19):
us. I've dealt with a multitudeof people who love you one day
and act like you don't exist thenext and yet I've managed to
crawl my way up every singlemountain every single crater and
I've always done it myself and alife that felt so unfair to me.
What did I do? I joined therestaurant industry a hell away
from hell. I pushed my waythrough the Culinary Institute
(16:40):
of America, earning mybachelor's degree in business
management and a minor in Asiancuisine. I placed fourth and my
first ever food competition. Iwon over 20,000 in scholarship
essays and I even traveled toSingapore. I pushed my way
through school because I knew mylion's roar was meant to be
heard. I knew there was someonemore than average looking back
(17:01):
at me in the mirror day in andday out and yet each day there's
always something more to improveon. Mental health is not brought
up enough especially those thatserve people daily, and yet can
barely manage to uphold theirown with minimal pay and no
recognition. It's hell but inthe best way possible. As a chef
I cook not to get recognition Icook because at the end of the
(17:22):
day, there's nothing that makesme feel more alive, walking into
the employee locker room andknowing you kicked butt during
dinner service. Knowing you'rethe only female on the line and
you wrote it out with ease. It'san exhilarating rush that makes
up for the late nights longhours and missed opportunities
because you had to work to lovethis industry is to live within
this industry. But it's thethrill of the job that
(17:43):
constantly keeps me alive andprevents me from not thinking
about those real life problems.
I feel most alive where I'm atmost uncomfortable meaning when
a kitchen scares me or when thehead chef is too intimidating. I
know not to run because I'm inthe right place. The only way
towards success is to pushthrough the times where giving
up feels like the easiest thingto do. I've been through my fair
(18:06):
share these past few years Isurrounded myself with people
who only wanted to tear me down.
And yet I thought they had myheart and their best interests
when in reality the second Istarted chasing my dreams and
stopped fixing thiers. I noticedmy true worth. Sometimes at the
end of the day I think thatperfect work life balance can be
as simple as waking up lookingin the mirror with gratitude and
(18:27):
getting your butt to the kitchenor to the office to prove to
yourself that yes, you can doit. So that is my article, very
vulnerable. Super, superthankful I got it out there.
Michael Dugan (18:42):
Abbey you should be proud. That is incredible,
incredibly honest and real. AndI'm just I'm feeling tremendous
emotion right now and I think alot of people that are listening
will. You painted a true pictureof things that do happen and you
came out of it.
Chef Abbey (18:59):
Thank you. Yeah, no, I think a lot of people look at
industry workers or evenhealthcare workers. Sometimes
they want to look at them asthese strong people who just
push through the bull crap dayin and day out. Sometimes we do
break down once we step out ofthose kitchens. Step out of the
(19:22):
offices or hospitals like we docarry all that on us and so I
think it's definitely somethingto be aware about.
Michael Dugan (19:29):
I remember a chef from cooking school Chef Hawley
use to bust hats. He was hewould split a hat. He would get
really stressed. Because hewould take the whole school on.
Imagine this big heavyset guythat's like six, I don't know
6'6 6'8 I mean, tall right andthen you add a chef's hat to
them. This is towering figuregets red in the face and you
(19:52):
watch the sweat. And the hatliterally splits so it takes it
off and jumps on it and you'rereally frustrated that something
didn't turn out right somebanquet wasn't working, but
we're students, right? We're allstudents. We're all learning.
We're all on the same journey.
And I just remember that thepressure and the intensity of
things can be can be hell, butit can also be heaven because
(20:14):
there's so many amazing thingsthat happen. I just think back
to this Romanian Baker, where weshared cultures and he was so
proud to share this covetedrecipe with me. Teach me how to
cook it this peanut butter pie.
I just I'll never forget. It'skind of a blessing and a curse
at the same time, I think butand it's not for everybody. We
(20:37):
know that. But it is for a lotof people and there's a lot of
great reward if you connect withthe right people. So speaking of
connection, is that right now?
Are there any chefs that youfollow? Or that we should
follow?
Chef Abbey (20:51):
Connections in terms of chefs to follow? Oh my gosh,
I feel like I should be namingevery chef that I've connected.
They're all incredible. And mypersonal hero that I look up to
that is unfortunately no longerwith us is Anthony Bourdain. And
(21:14):
I just got a book of his forChristmas and the other day I
finally just sat down to watchhis documentary that recently
just went out. And I cried. Ifelt the emotions high and low
and it was incredible watchingthat movie. Oh, gosh, just made
him more of an inspiration tome. And I sense that, his love
(21:38):
for writing and bringing the itto life, his love for traveling
and his ability to be supervulnerable in the sense that,
he's human like all of us andhe's struggled in all of those
ways. Trying to balance that theindustry life with, outside life
and a lot of chefs old and youngare struggling to do that. It's
(22:05):
hard for me to wrap my headaround because it doesn't have
to be like that becausesome ofour greatest inspirations is
pushing them to the edge. Thatsays something that something
needs to change. He definitelytaught me. Friendships are
created over eating like anymeal together, and I totally
(22:31):
believe that and I will believethat for as long as I live,
that, create these friendshipsand these connections and
relationships through eating ameal and sitting down at a
dinner table together. And Ijust thought, it's so important
to me, I think for as long as Ilive, I'll be building those
(22:51):
relationships and friendships,through food and my love of
food. I hope everyone does thesame as well.
Michael Dugan (22:57):
We're in the section now called let's get
cooking. Have you traveledoutside of the US or just in the
US?
Chef Abbey (23:05):
I have traveled to Singapore, Malaysia. I did that
during my four month studyabroad trip. I want to say last
year but that it's been twoyears now because time has been
flying. But it was an absoluteincredible trip.
Michael Dugan (23:22):
What was so great about it can you tell us a
little bit about any restaurantthat he went to or a favorite
place that he visited.
Chef Abbey (23:29):
I think I guess emotional experience I remember
was the sensory overload when Iarrived to Singapore in the way
their culture worked, and thewhat they ate for breakfast and
how different it was fromAmerica. And that's sort of what
(23:50):
I based my entire capstoneproject off of was the idea of
how different breakfast culturewas in Singapore versus America.
Yes. And I actually I just wantto read a really small excerpt
from my article of me travelingto Singapore because go for it.
(24:11):
This definitely explains thefeeling of arrival in Singapore.
It was only the crack of dawn,when my plane landed in
Singapore, exhausted from thepast 17 hours of flying airplane
meals that were more scary thanappetizing and noises of unhappy
children raining throughout myears. I wanted anything that was
(24:31):
both edible and enjoyable,despite the fact it was only six
in the morning. The airportseemed lively and joyful. Food
places were opened down theembellished hallways that
filtered throughout the airport,and my stomach seems to growl
echoing off the walls so itseemed pickiness still creep
through my groggy eyes and thereI was. Passing up countless
(24:53):
choices, eventually making myway to a ramen place. As
poignant as it is the name hasescaped my mind but the flavor
of the food will be imprintedamongst my taste buds for as
long as I'll remember. I indulgein a bowl of pork tonkatsu
ramen, the flavors swirl aroundmy mouth like an electric
current. The warm broth coziedup my tired body allowing me to
(25:15):
feel rejuvenated. Here I wastreating myself to a bowl of
ramen a meal I'd normally eatanytime during lunch or dinner
minutes after I arrived inSingapore at 6am in the morning,
right in that exact moment. Iknew there was something
peculiar about Singapore's foodculture, but it had to figure
(25:36):
out so I wanted to read that foryou guys because to me that
explains my whole journey everysingle day throughout Singapore.
Each day was a sensory overload.
Finding new and little thingsthat they do, that I found to be
so unique in their architecture.
Oh my goodness is absolutelybeautiful. It's it's incredible.
(26:02):
It's just when you're walkingthrough the city of Singapore,
you're just an absolute awe.
It's definitely a place I wantto travel back to that's for
sure.
Michael Dugan (26:12):
I have it on my list for a different reason. But
now I have really have it on mylist. I saw show with Anthony
Bourdain, where he visitedSingapore I think he'd be stuck
stuck or something and he misseda plane or something and he was
stuck. So he's talked about howmuch you could do in Singapore
and kind of anyway, the realreason for me is that I went to
(26:35):
school at Washington StateUniversity and I got a hotel
restaurant degree after cookingschool, a few years later, and
then I left the business. But ithappens. There are reasons right
so just just don't worry aboutit. I met this friend of mine
named Christina and she was fromSingapore and we became really
(26:58):
good friends and we becameconnected to food, meaning that
I shared what I knew aboutEuropean styles and things and
she shared her Singaporeanstyles and it was this amazing
blend of the Asian culture andthe American culture. I've
always wanted to go visit her inSingapore, because that's where
she lives and so it just broughtback these memories. She came to
(27:20):
my house in Seattle forThanksgiving and met my parents
and we're just really, reallygood friends. And we were also
very competitive at WashingtonState University. We would both
interview for every opportunitythat came up for internships and
that's also how we becamefriends. The memory oh my gosh,
(27:42):
you brought up this amazingmemory and and now I want to go
there even more, I mean I feelreally driven.
Chef Abbey (27:51):
Oh my god from the chili crab. There black pepper
crab. Hinese chicken. Oh mygosh, it's all mouth watering
and delicious.
Michael Dugan (28:02):
And it's also a blend of other countries. Right.
Chef Abbey (28:05):
So it is a melting pot. Yeah, Malaysia
Michael Dugan (28:11):
Yeah. And it should be on your list. And it
sadly it sadly was cut shortbecause of COVID. But I
definitely want to make my wayback there. Just just to eat and
go out to a hawker stall. It'sjust I don't know it's a hard
feeling to describe but theirway of life abroad. I think that
(28:36):
made me realize my love forexperiencing, different cultures
in the 3d way just going outthere and experiencing that way
not through a computer screen ora textbook. It's just it is a
feeling that is unimaginable andit's something everyone if they
have the chance to do should goout and do because when you
(28:58):
become humble towards anotherculture and immerse yourself in
it. You just each build theamount of respect in love and
it's just it's very heartwarmingand it's definitely something I
want to base my career at themoment trying to figure out my
way to get thier.
That's okay, we all go throughthat you're young. It's it's the
(29:20):
beginning of your life journey.
You got a lot of excitingadventures coming up. Can you
describe any of your specialtiesthat what type of cuisine Do you
like to cook? I know you minoredin Asia cuisine, so I'm very
intrigued, but I would love to,to hear or have you describe a
couple of your specialties.
Chef Abbey (29:37):
Oh, okay. So the first one it might come to a
shock because everyone'sprobably expecting me to say
something savory, but aspecialty of mine is making
cheese cakes. As silly as thatsounds. It's something I do on
the side. I know I've started tosell a few to some people and
(29:58):
family and friends. I like toget really creative with them
whether it's a turtlecheesecake with candied pecans
on top of banana splitcheesecake, strawberry tart,
raspberry jam. I've definitelytried many different varieties
and over time it I've had somuch fun experiencing
(30:22):
manipulate, manipulating therecipe and changing the
ingredients and about to perfectthe texture and flavor that I
want. And it actually has takenme two years to finally put an
official recipe in my note tomy phone that I feel comfortable
enough with because I haven'tofficially come across one until
(30:43):
just a few months ago.
Definitely something I like todo on the side.
Michael Dugan (30:47):
Any entrees?
Chef Abbey (30:48):
Entrees my favorite to make oh my gosh I would have
to say would be anything pasta.
It definitely has to be freshpasta, egg pasta is my favorite
but then of course you have nokey that I actually just made
some the other day and you cando so many different varieties
and just whether if you sauteand brown butter or if you have
(31:11):
an actual sauce on it, that'sdelicious. Other things and
there's so many things I want tojust think of right now that
I've been talking about. Asiancuisine wise, I absolutely love
making homemade spicy orangechicken and homemade dumplings,
because that's a must. Learningabout dumplings in Singapore
(31:34):
that was actually my weakestmoment. But that was that's kind
of what made me not want to stoppracticing making them because
they are a challenge. Gettingthem the perfect steam and a
perfect sear without itsticking. That's definitely hard
to do. Let me think going downcooked at home seared scallops,
(31:57):
that's always a fun thing. Andspecifically because it's always
fun to get that perfect crust onit because it's so easy to over
cook scallops, really one extrasecond and they're overcooked
and chewy and it's definitelyfun to work. Oh god, there's
just so much.
Michael Dugan (32:18):
I'm gonna have to pick one but five, I believe.
I'm the same. I can't stop here.
So now. I have a big challengefor you. And I stumped chef
sometimes on this. So are youready? I'm ready. All right. In
your experience, it could be atthe CIA Culinary Institute of
(32:38):
America or just in working in arestaurant. What one time do you
remember where you had a majorkitchen disaster?
Chef Abbey (32:48):
A major kitchen disaster?
Michael Dugan (32:50):
And some people skip this question. I don't
think you'll skate it.
Chef Abbey (32:53):
It was my first day on externship in Park City,
Utah. And it was two days beforeChristmas. And so the kitchen
was an absolute madhouse. We hadevery front of house staff there
every back of house staff wasthere. Here's me the new xtern
(33:14):
and also one of the only girlsin the kitchen uniform, nervous
as all hell. And I go to thedish pit and I turned around to
go somewhere else at the timeand I bumped into a server that
has an entire tray of food andglass cups, and not all over on
(33:38):
the floor and it shatterseverywhere and the kitchen that
was in that house goesabsolutely silent every eye is
on me. I have absolutely no ideawhat to do. At this point I
just accepted my feet as likeback to school they don't want
(33:59):
me here and I will never forgetI went to go through rather than
mop bucket and after I picked upall the little pieces. I went to
go grab the mop bucket to pickup the spill. And my chef at the
time Chef John absolutely lovedhim. I learned so much from him.
My first day he looks at me andhe yells and he was heavy. He's
(34:22):
like what the hell are youdoing? He runs over to the dirty
towel bed grabs a handful ofdirty towels and just throws
them on the floor and he saysthink smarter why are you
grabbing the mop I can yelled atme like the kitchen still
(34:43):
silent. And I didn't sayanything back the only thing I
said was Yes, Chef. And that wasdefinitely one of my first real
fine dining kitchen experiencedisasters. I definitely felt
every emotion possible in thatmoment. And it's definitely a
moment I will not forget.
Michael Dugan (35:06):
Wow, yeah, that's that's a good kitchen disaster.
I'm rating them on the show.
That one's pretty high up there.
Yeah. I've had a few I wasbussing tables when I was kind
of getting into the industry andI never really bussed tables
(35:27):
before so I had this big traywith these water glasses with
filled with ice and it washeavy. And I walked up to this
table and I was trying to putthe water glasses down and the
whole tray fell and water justwent everywhere all over. And I
kept my job. It's very gloriousand glamorous, but it's part of
(35:51):
how you pay your dues. I'llnever forget that but I've had
I've had some kitchen disasters,but that's something that I
remember from actually listeningto you and your story.
Chef Abbey (36:02):
Really quick if I go back to a kitchen disaster, it
was at school, actually, with myclass at the time. And this is
with two of my very closefriends. In class and we were in
America's cuisines with a reallywell known chef at the time. She
(36:24):
was rated to be one of the topteachers for the class and one
of the more difficult ones thatwere claiming are not me
specifically but my friend Diegointerested in and Mark are
cleaning the fryer and I thinkif anyone has experienced this,
they know how terrible thecleanup processes they dumped
(36:49):
the fryer oil all over and thenduring their process of mopping
it up, we're all watching thechef's just staring at them
waiting for them to be done. Sowe can end the class and they're
about to go push the mop bucketback to dump it and the mop
bucket temps all over the floor.
And so we watch them up again inwatching them take it to them
(37:14):
obscene thinking this is it.
They don't the mop bucket forthe third time in our watch. I
will never forget my chefs thelook on her face and the
disappointment and me knowing Itechnically I have to take the
heat as a team leader. Alright,come on guys. And knowing then,
(37:37):
like at the time they were justlaughing hysterically because at
that time there's like nothingelse to do. Because it was all
genuinely accidental. Just theworst three coincidence back to
back and that was definitelykitchen class disaster, that's
for sure but one that we lookback and laugh hysterically now.
Michael Dugan (37:58):
What's interesting is people may not
realize but if you're the lead,you might be graded on how you
react to that. Depend ondisaster and how you recover,
right?
Chef Abbey (38:10):
Yeah, were sort of laughing under their breath to
themselves and they had toshamelessly mop it up for the
second time.
Michael Dugan (38:24):
Yeah, I remember a lot of these things. I mean,
it's I think it's just so commonin industry and even in cooking
school. As we take this out. Doyou have any special message for
us that you want to share andhelp? How can we support you and
the culinary community?
Chef Abbey (38:42):
I would say that my special message that I have to
share for that the new incomingyoung chefs that are coming into
the industry and even the olderones is to never feel like you
aren't powerful enough to have avoice whether you're just
starting out or you're up at thetop you will always have a voice
(39:06):
and you will always have achance to speak up and you
should always speak up andempower yourself in the kitchen
as you want. To be empowered inreal life. And that's something
I'm currently trying to teachmyself and try to bring
awareness to others because Ithink we all have to realize our
(39:30):
strengths as individuals theyounger generation going into
the industry, we all have torealize how strong we are if we
come together and continue tospeak up and choir positive
changes for the industry thatwill do nothing but better the
world as it is and how we eat.
So that's my special message toeveryone.
Michael Dugan (39:54):
That's a great message. And I know people are
excited about this episode andthey want to connect with you.
How do they find you?
Chef Abbey (40:02):
The best way to connect with me currently is
both through my Instagramaccount, which is Chef Abby
Miller and that will give youthe ability to email me through
my email as well. And I alsolove to connect with people
through clubhouse so if you'dlike to also follow me on there,
(40:23):
join the club through thisreligion because not only will I
be talking about importantmental health issues, but you'll
come across so many people andso many topics that I'm sure any
one of you guys who arelistening right now will 100%
have a place in will be welcomedin to talk about whatever your
(40:43):
heart desires to talk about andget out there. Clubhouse or
Instagram just follow me backchanneling I'll usually answer
anyone back right away. I'mpretty quick on that.
Michael Dugan (40:54):
Chef Abbey, thank you so much for being a guest on
our show and you truly are aVoice4Chefs.
Chef Abbey (41:02):
Thank you so so much for having me. I'm so thankful I
connected with you throughclubhouse and now through this
amazing podcast, and I'm superexcited to work
I will tell this to everyone I crossed paths with
(02:48):
till the day I die is that inorder to make the world go
round, everyone needs to eat,the world cannot live without
very true the restaurant in thefood industry. And the same
thing goes with health care, thehero workers as well. The things
that we can't live without, Ithink are these types of jobs
(03:12):
are definitely one of the mostunder appreciated.
Michael Dugan (03:16):
I was obsessed just like you about food and
then the culture and chef's andI realized that, I wanted to be
a chef, and then went to cookingschool and I basically just
dove in. I didn't care aboutanything else. It just my life
and I collected 66 cookbooks ayear and a half? That's, yeah,
(03:40):
let's see, we didn't have thefood channel back then. We had
cookbooks we had the VHS and Ithink the DVDs are coming along
for me I'm a little older. Ikind of grew up with, I went to
cooking school, I did aninternship or apprenticeship. It
(04:05):
really was because I worked fora country club. I met this
amazing chef , chef Michael. Ican't remember his last name
right now, but he was I thinkFrench Canadian. And it was this
incredible experience I'd neverbeen through before where I just
saw all this food, fine diningfood. I had never seen and I
(04:27):
tasted peanut butter pie andboullibase and halibut. All
these incredible dishes thatcame from all over the world. I
met with a Romanian Baker at thecountry club. I became friends
with them. And he gave me hissecret peanut butter pie recipe.
And that kind of experience isso powerful and then the chef.
(04:51):
Chef Michael took me into thewalk in after about six months
because Michael you are doing agreat job as a prep cook right
as just starting out over prepfood. And I would go home
probably like you did Abby and Iwould take out when it first
learned to saute I took out abag of frozen peas and I put in
a pan and I would flip them inthe air and they would go all
(05:13):
over the floor. And I did thatfor a week and then all of a
sudden they landed in the pan.
So that's how I learned tosaute. That was before cooking
school. And then I would take abag of oranges and I would learn
how to basically filleted themis what my wife calls where you
peel it with a knife and youhave to get the curvature of the
fruit right. You have to knowwhere that curve goes because
(05:35):
you don't want to lose any ofthe fruit. So took a whole bag
of oranges I went over to myparents and I peeled them and
gave them dishes with oranges,orange juice, I use the oranges
up right but it was a practicething to get the skill down. And
the chef knew that I was doingthis. So when I was in the
walk-in and he took me in thewalk-in one day and said I got
(05:56):
some good news and bad news. Thegood news is I want to keep you
the bad news is that I can't payyou. Literally another six
months was an unpaid internshipwhere I almost went broke. And
then I turned to him after ayear and I said I have to go. I
love you. I love what you'vetaught me because he taught me
everything. There were noboundaries anymore. When I was
(06:17):
his apprentice, I could work anystation, right? I could work
alongside people because hewasn't paying me and what I
remember is he hooked me up witha really great French restaurant
and then I did anotherpartnership. Because I was a
prep cook dishwasher eventuallyline cook and I learned all the
intricacies of fine dining,small French restaurant. It's
(06:38):
amazing that you get so hookedon this stuff, but do you make a
decent living wage in thebeginning? No. I mean, that's
that's the real problem. Right?
It's not as valued as it shouldbe. I've had conversations with
Chef Jensen about and that's thereal issue is people need to see
the value of what people in thehospitality are doing.
(07:01):
Especially during the pandemic,they're keeping everybody fed,
right. Whether you go and youdine, or whether you take
takeout they should be honoredand respected and instead people
complain. They complain aboutthe service. I found myself
guilty of doing it once and Iwent, Wait a minute. These
people are working so hard, andthey're short staffed, of course
(07:22):
this service is going to suffer.
But the bottom line is we do itbecause of our passion. We do it
because we're obsessed becauseit's something that we are so
excited about being creative.
Chef Abbey (07:31):
It comes down to not only the people inside the
industry understanding that butthe people outside the industry
having some type of basisknowledge of everything. What
we go through and what we do andwhat it takes to get from the
cutting board to the plate.
Maybe it would help that senseof understanding and compassion
(07:52):
that's needed a little more atrestaurant establishments.
Michael Dugan (07:59):
Can you share a little about your journey now
moving forward in clubhouse,what happened? There? What was
that experience like? Or is thatexperience like?
Chef Abbey (08:08):
Clubhouse started all because of the Anthony
Bourdain scholarship that I hadreceived through the Culinary
Institute of America. It wasn'tuntil submitting those
scholarships sitting behind thedesk at my library job on campus
at 11 o'clock at night, justtyping because I'm tired and
(08:31):
bored. My mom has been buggingme for months to do these
scholarships. And she's likeAbbey, just sit down and do them
they're extra money you don'tknow what you could win and I
was like, fine. And so finallyat the library job for the heck
of it. I'm just gonna sit andwrite. And it wasn't until then
that I discovered my true lovefor writing, describing food
(08:55):
through writing bringing it tolife. So I wrote a lot of the
scholarships and I was fortunateenough to win a lot of them as
well. After graduation. I got intouch with Dan who's a Dean of
Business Management at CIA. Igot in touch with Chef Jensen
and Chef Mimi and the JamesBeard Foundation. And that's
(09:18):
when we all kind of cametogether and did this room
through clubhouse to talk aboutthe process of writing that
scholarship and what was goingthrough my mind and why I wrote
what I did. I was super new toclubhouse. I believe that was my
very first time experiencing theapp and let alone really talking
(09:42):
to that many people at oncebecause that's something I'm not
super familiar with. Chef Mimiafter that took me under her
wing, as well as Chef Jensen. Iworked with them. If over the
past few months and in the clubFood is religion. I am so
fortunate enough to meet so manypeople and how many people I've
(10:06):
connected with that are inCalifornia or in Singapore it's
crazy. Yeah, and it's amazingand it's definitely allowed me
to understand my love for publicspeaking and my love for the
different side of culinarybecause culinary doesn't always
have to be in the kitchen. WhenI graduated from school from
(10:31):
college, I was super unaware ofwhat to do because right when I
graduated that was when COVIDwas going on. I graduated by
sitting in my living roomwatching my speech play on my
TV.
Michael Dugan (10:44):
Yeah my wife was the same she got her master's
degree online.
Chef Abbey (10:48):
Definitely the unexpected type of graduation
and after that I didn't knowwhat to do because that was the
time that I discovered I reallywant to write. I want to get
into the editing and foodphotography and write and bring
stories to life. I had no ideahow to I was super lost and I
(11:14):
was a system manager at thisdesert place in Pittsburgh. At
the time I was living with mysignificant other was working at
this milkshake place and it wasvery, very cool place in
Pittsburgh. I offered to takephotography photos and my
photos, got them published in amagazine for their first time
(11:34):
and that's when I was like, Okayyou can really do this.
Michael Dugan (11:38):
Let's pause and give a shout out to this place.
What's the name?
Chef Abbey (11:42):
The Milkshake factory so yes, it's in many
locations and it was a supersuper fun place to work at. They
actually started as a chocolatefactory that turned into a
milkshake place. I offered justout of my free time. I wanted to
really take photos for them. AndI got a lot of great ones. And
(12:05):
that's when I truly realizedwhere I was most happiest and at
the time though I was stillstruggling with a lot of mental
health issues and just realize Ijust wasn't happy in that type
of work and I was like Abbeyjust get yourself back in the
kitchen you need to be in frontof the heat for a little bit get
(12:25):
back into what you used to do. Iheaded out to Utah to help Stein
Eriksen for their winter season.
I was communicating with one ofmy good friends and chefs at
work at Stein Eriksen and manymonths beforehand so I knew they
needed help. I love that placedefinitely for everything that
it has taught me so I headed outthere. I lived with my best
(12:48):
friend that I met an externalfor a little bit living in Utah.
That's definitely when clubhousesort of exploded for me
definitely when I realized howmuch I loved it and how much I
liked the writing and the publicspeaking. I would be at work in
the kitchen. There is nothingmore that I want to do right now
(13:08):
then go right and go talkin inrooms on clubhouse. The more I
worked with Chef Mimi and themore we got into deeper topics
and the more connections I builtwith you guys. Honestly I look
at food is religion and thepeople that I've met through
clubhouse, I've learned it'smore than just a community it
(13:31):
feels like a family to me. Iremember Michelle Gill, The
Grief Curator talking aboutwanting us all to get together
and I'm like absolutely. If wecan all somehow gather up and
meet we all have opened up insome way or another. It's like
(13:55):
public healing in a way yourhealing with all of these other
people and even the more youtell your story, the less it
hurts and the more it feelsempowering to talk to other
people about it. And that'sdefinitely what I love most
about it.
Michael Dugan (14:14):
And that's that's incredible. A huge shout out to
Chef Mimi and Chef Jensen fromBest Served Podcast. They are
heroes of the hospitalityindustry.
Chef Abbey (14:26):
Oh my gosh, absolutely. Chef Jensen,
alongside doing the AnthonyBourdain podcast through
clubhouse. He had reached out tome one day I have this really
cool thing that I want you to bea part of and it was the 868686
challenge.
Michael Dugan (14:48):
We got to talk about that.
Chef Abbey (14:50):
And he reached out to me and said I know you love
writing and your writing isgreat. I want you to like submit
a piece. And I was likeabsolutely. And I definitely
chose obviously the idea ofoutside life and how to deal
(15:12):
with it while working in thekitchen and that's sort of the
topic I pushed myself towardswhen I sat down and decided to
write and the title of myarticle for that challenge was
The Kitchen A Hell Away FromHell. So everyone's probably
wondering what does that mean?
Michael Dugan (15:31):
Gotta read it.
Chef Abbey (15:33):
Read it. Beginning to finish.
Michael Dugan (15:35):
Yes,
Chef Abbey (15:36):
I will pull it up real quick. It was definitely a
vulnerable point when I sat downto write it and I wasn't , I
didn't understand how manypeople would be reading these
articles until after the fact.
But I think after submitting I'mglad I did that. So I'll start
from the beginning. And it saysgrowing up I struggled with self
(15:59):
love more than anyone could haveever imagined. I was a lion's
roar that wasn't heard. I was aperson based upon her mistakes
and the baggage she carriedbehind her. Nothing else and
nothing more. I dealt with anabusive father more than 40
times in my life, dealt withsexual assault and was
constantly told by those closestto me, it happens to the best of
(16:19):
us. I've dealt with a multitudeof people who love you one day
and act like you don't exist thenext and yet I've managed to
crawl my way up every singlemountain every single crater and
I've always done it myself and alife that felt so unfair to me.
What did I do? I joined therestaurant industry a hell away
from hell. I pushed my waythrough the Culinary Institute
(16:40):
of America, earning mybachelor's degree in business
management and a minor in Asiancuisine. I placed fourth and my
first ever food competition. Iwon over 20,000 in scholarship
essays and I even traveled toSingapore. I pushed my way
through school because I knew mylion's roar was meant to be
heard. I knew there was someonemore than average looking back
(17:01):
at me in the mirror day in andday out and yet each day there's
always something more to improveon. Mental health is not brought
up enough especially those thatserve people daily, and yet can
barely manage to uphold theirown with minimal pay and no
recognition. It's hell but inthe best way possible. As a chef
I cook not to get recognition Icook because at the end of the
(17:22):
day, there's nothing that makesme feel more alive, walking into
the employee locker room andknowing you kicked butt during
dinner service. Knowing you'rethe only female on the line and
you wrote it out with ease. It'san exhilarating rush that makes
up for the late nights longhours and missed opportunities
because you had to work to lovethis industry is to live within
this industry. But it's thethrill of the job that
(17:43):
constantly keeps me alive andprevents me from not thinking
about those real life problems.
I feel most alive where I'm atmost uncomfortable meaning when
a kitchen scares me or when thehead chef is too intimidating. I
know not to run because I'm inthe right place. The only way
towards success is to pushthrough the times where giving
up feels like the easiest thingto do. I've been through my fair
(18:06):
share these past few years Isurrounded myself with people
who only wanted to tear me down.
And yet I thought they had myheart and their best interests
when in reality the second Istarted chasing my dreams and
stopped fixing thiers. I noticedmy true worth. Sometimes at the
end of the day I think thatperfect work life balance can be
as simple as waking up lookingin the mirror with gratitude and
(18:27):
getting your butt to the kitchenor to the office to prove to
yourself that yes, you can doit. So that is my article, very
vulnerable. Super, superthankful I got it out there.
Michael Dugan (18:42):
Abbey you should be proud. That is incredible,
incredibly honest and real. AndI'm just I'm feeling tremendous
emotion right now and I think alot of people that are listening
will. You painted a true pictureof things that do happen and you
came out of it.
Chef Abbey (18:59):
Thank you. Yeah, no, I think a lot of people look at
industry workers or evenhealthcare workers. Sometimes
they want to look at them asthese strong people who just
push through the bull crap dayin and day out. Sometimes we do
break down once we step out ofthose kitchens. Step out of the
(19:22):
offices or hospitals like we docarry all that on us and so I
think it's definitely somethingto be aware about.
Michael Dugan (19:29):
I remember a chef from cooking school Chef Hawley
use to bust hats. He was hewould split a hat. He would get
really stressed. Because hewould take the whole school on.
Imagine this big heavyset guythat's like six, I don't know
6'6 6'8 I mean, tall right andthen you add a chef's hat to
them. This is towering figuregets red in the face and you
(19:52):
watch the sweat. And the hatliterally splits so it takes it
off and jumps on it and you'rereally frustrated that something
didn't turn out right somebanquet wasn't working, but
we're students, right? We're allstudents. We're all learning.
We're all on the same journey.
And I just remember that thepressure and the intensity of
things can be can be hell, butit can also be heaven because
(20:14):
there's so many amazing thingsthat happen. I just think back
to this Romanian Baker, where weshared cultures and he was so
proud to share this covetedrecipe with me. Teach me how to
cook it this peanut butter pie.
I just I'll never forget. It'skind of a blessing and a curse
at the same time, I think butand it's not for everybody. We
(20:37):
know that. But it is for a lotof people and there's a lot of
great reward if you connect withthe right people. So speaking of
connection, is that right now?
Are there any chefs that youfollow? Or that we should
follow?
Chef Abbey (20:51):
Connections in terms of chefs to follow? Oh my gosh,
I feel like I should be namingevery chef that I've connected.
They're all incredible. And mypersonal hero that I look up to
that is unfortunately no longerwith us is Anthony Bourdain. And
(21:14):
I just got a book of his forChristmas and the other day I
finally just sat down to watchhis documentary that recently
just went out. And I cried. Ifelt the emotions high and low
and it was incredible watchingthat movie. Oh, gosh, just made
him more of an inspiration tome. And I sense that, his love
(21:38):
for writing and bringing the itto life, his love for traveling
and his ability to be supervulnerable in the sense that,
he's human like all of us andhe's struggled in all of those
ways. Trying to balance that theindustry life with, outside life
and a lot of chefs old and youngare struggling to do that. It's
(22:05):
hard for me to wrap my headaround because it doesn't have
to be like that becausesome ofour greatest inspirations is
pushing them to the edge. Thatsays something that something
needs to change. He definitelytaught me. Friendships are
created over eating like anymeal together, and I totally
(22:31):
believe that and I will believethat for as long as I live,
that, create these friendshipsand these connections and
relationships through eating ameal and sitting down at a
dinner table together. And Ijust thought, it's so important
to me, I think for as long as Ilive, I'll be building those
(22:51):
relationships and friendships,through food and my love of
food. I hope everyone does thesame as well.
Michael Dugan (22:57):
We're in the section now called let's get
cooking. Have you traveledoutside of the US or just in the
US?
Chef Abbey (23:05):
I have traveled to Singapore, Malaysia. I did that
during my four month studyabroad trip. I want to say last
year but that it's been twoyears now because time has been
flying. But it was an absoluteincredible trip.
Michael Dugan (23:22):
What was so great about it can you tell us a
little bit about any restaurantthat he went to or a favorite
place that he visited.
Chef Abbey (23:29):
I think I guess emotional experience I remember
was the sensory overload when Iarrived to Singapore in the way
their culture worked, and thewhat they ate for breakfast and
how different it was fromAmerica. And that's sort of what
(23:50):
I based my entire capstoneproject off of was the idea of
how different breakfast culturewas in Singapore versus America.
Yes. And I actually I just wantto read a really small excerpt
from my article of me travelingto Singapore because go for it.
(24:11):
This definitely explains thefeeling of arrival in Singapore.
It was only the crack of dawn,when my plane landed in
Singapore, exhausted from thepast 17 hours of flying airplane
meals that were more scary thanappetizing and noises of unhappy
children raining throughout myears. I wanted anything that was
(24:31):
both edible and enjoyable,despite the fact it was only six
in the morning. The airportseemed lively and joyful. Food
places were opened down theembellished hallways that
filtered throughout the airport,and my stomach seems to growl
echoing off the walls so itseemed pickiness still creep
through my groggy eyes and thereI was. Passing up countless
(24:53):
choices, eventually making myway to a ramen place. As
poignant as it is the name hasescaped my mind but the flavor
of the food will be imprintedamongst my taste buds for as
long as I'll remember. I indulgein a bowl of pork tonkatsu
ramen, the flavors swirl aroundmy mouth like an electric
current. The warm broth coziedup my tired body allowing me to
(25:15):
feel rejuvenated. Here I wastreating myself to a bowl of
ramen a meal I'd normally eatanytime during lunch or dinner
minutes after I arrived inSingapore at 6am in the morning,
right in that exact moment. Iknew there was something
peculiar about Singapore's foodculture, but it had to figure
(25:36):
out so I wanted to read that foryou guys because to me that
explains my whole journey everysingle day throughout Singapore.
Each day was a sensory overload.
Finding new and little thingsthat they do, that I found to be
so unique in their architecture.
Oh my goodness is absolutelybeautiful. It's it's incredible.
(26:02):
It's just when you're walkingthrough the city of Singapore,
you're just an absolute awe.
It's definitely a place I wantto travel back to that's for
sure.
Michael Dugan (26:12):
I have it on my list for a different reason. But
now I have really have it on mylist. I saw show with Anthony
Bourdain, where he visitedSingapore I think he'd be stuck
stuck or something and he misseda plane or something and he was
stuck. So he's talked about howmuch you could do in Singapore
and kind of anyway, the realreason for me is that I went to
(26:35):
school at Washington StateUniversity and I got a hotel
restaurant degree after cookingschool, a few years later, and
then I left the business. But ithappens. There are reasons right
so just just don't worry aboutit. I met this friend of mine
named Christina and she was fromSingapore and we became really
(26:58):
good friends and we becameconnected to food, meaning that
I shared what I knew aboutEuropean styles and things and
she shared her Singaporeanstyles and it was this amazing
blend of the Asian culture andthe American culture. I've
always wanted to go visit her inSingapore, because that's where
she lives and so it just broughtback these memories. She came to
(27:20):
my house in Seattle forThanksgiving and met my parents
and we're just really, reallygood friends. And we were also
very competitive at WashingtonState University. We would both
interview for every opportunitythat came up for internships and
that's also how we becamefriends. The memory oh my gosh,
(27:42):
you brought up this amazingmemory and and now I want to go
there even more, I mean I feelreally driven.
Chef Abbey (27:51):
Oh my god from the chili crab. There black pepper
crab. Hinese chicken. Oh mygosh, it's all mouth watering
and delicious.
Michael Dugan (28:02):
And it's also a blend of other countries. Right.
Chef Abbey (28:05):
So it is a melting pot. Yeah, Malaysia
Michael Dugan (28:11):
Yeah. And it should be on your list. And it
sadly it sadly was cut shortbecause of COVID. But I
definitely want to make my wayback there. Just just to eat and
go out to a hawker stall. It'sjust I don't know it's a hard
feeling to describe but theirway of life abroad. I think that
(28:36):
made me realize my love forexperiencing, different cultures
in the 3d way just going outthere and experiencing that way
not through a computer screen ora textbook. It's just it is a
feeling that is unimaginable andit's something everyone if they
have the chance to do should goout and do because when you
(28:58):
become humble towards anotherculture and immerse yourself in
it. You just each build theamount of respect in love and
it's just it's very heartwarmingand it's definitely something I
want to base my career at themoment trying to figure out my
way to get thier.
That's okay, we all go throughthat you're young. It's it's the
(29:20):
beginning of your life journey.
You got a lot of excitingadventures coming up. Can you
describe any of your specialtiesthat what type of cuisine Do you
like to cook? I know you minoredin Asia cuisine, so I'm very
intrigued, but I would love to,to hear or have you describe a
couple of your specialties.
Chef Abbey (29:37):
Oh, okay. So the first one it might come to a
shock because everyone'sprobably expecting me to say
something savory, but aspecialty of mine is making
cheese cakes. As silly as thatsounds. It's something I do on
the side. I know I've started tosell a few to some people and
(29:58):
family and friends. I like toget really creative with them
whether it's a turtlecheesecake with candied pecans
on top of banana splitcheesecake, strawberry tart,
raspberry jam. I've definitelytried many different varieties
and over time it I've had somuch fun experiencing
(30:22):
manipulate, manipulating therecipe and changing the
ingredients and about to perfectthe texture and flavor that I
want. And it actually has takenme two years to finally put an
official recipe in my note tomy phone that I feel comfortable
enough with because I haven'tofficially come across one until
(30:43):
just a few months ago.
Definitely something I like todo on the side.
Michael Dugan (30:47):
Any entrees?
Chef Abbey (30:48):
Entrees my favorite to make oh my gosh I would have
to say would be anything pasta.
It definitely has to be freshpasta, egg pasta is my favorite
but then of course you have nokey that I actually just made
some the other day and you cando so many different varieties
and just whether if you sauteand brown butter or if you have
(31:11):
an actual sauce on it, that'sdelicious. Other things and
there's so many things I want tojust think of right now that
I've been talking about. Asiancuisine wise, I absolutely love
making homemade spicy orangechicken and homemade dumplings,
because that's a must. Learningabout dumplings in Singapore
(31:34):
that was actually my weakestmoment. But that was that's kind
of what made me not want to stoppracticing making them because
they are a challenge. Gettingthem the perfect steam and a
perfect sear without itsticking. That's definitely hard
to do. Let me think going downcooked at home seared scallops,
(31:57):
that's always a fun thing. Andspecifically because it's always
fun to get that perfect crust onit because it's so easy to over
cook scallops, really one extrasecond and they're overcooked
and chewy and it's definitelyfun to work. Oh god, there's
just so much.
Michael Dugan (32:18):
I'm gonna have to pick one but five, I believe.
I'm the same. I can't stop here.
So now. I have a big challengefor you. And I stumped chef
sometimes on this. So are youready? I'm ready. All right. In
your experience, it could be atthe CIA Culinary Institute of
(32:38):
America or just in working in arestaurant. What one time do you
remember where you had a majorkitchen disaster?
Chef Abbey (32:48):
A major kitchen disaster?
Michael Dugan (32:50):
And some people skip this question. I don't
think you'll skate it.
Chef Abbey (32:53):
It was my first day on externship in Park City,
Utah. And it was two days beforeChristmas. And so the kitchen
was an absolute madhouse. We hadevery front of house staff there
every back of house staff wasthere. Here's me the new xtern
(33:14):
and also one of the only girlsin the kitchen uniform, nervous
as all hell. And I go to thedish pit and I turned around to
go somewhere else at the timeand I bumped into a server that
has an entire tray of food andglass cups, and not all over on
(33:38):
the floor and it shatterseverywhere and the kitchen that
was in that house goesabsolutely silent every eye is
on me. I have absolutely no ideawhat to do. At this point I
just accepted my feet as likeback to school they don't want
(33:59):
me here and I will never forgetI went to go through rather than
mop bucket and after I picked upall the little pieces. I went to
go grab the mop bucket to pickup the spill. And my chef at the
time Chef John absolutely lovedhim. I learned so much from him.
My first day he looks at me andhe yells and he was heavy. He's
(34:22):
like what the hell are youdoing? He runs over to the dirty
towel bed grabs a handful ofdirty towels and just throws
them on the floor and he saysthink smarter why are you
grabbing the mop I can yelled atme like the kitchen still
(34:43):
silent. And I didn't sayanything back the only thing I
said was Yes, Chef. And that wasdefinitely one of my first real
fine dining kitchen experiencedisasters. I definitely felt
every emotion possible in thatmoment. And it's definitely a
moment I will not forget.
Michael Dugan (35:06):
Wow, yeah, that's that's a good kitchen disaster.
I'm rating them on the show.
That one's pretty high up there.
Yeah. I've had a few I wasbussing tables when I was kind
of getting into the industry andI never really bussed tables
(35:27):
before so I had this big traywith these water glasses with
filled with ice and it washeavy. And I walked up to this
table and I was trying to putthe water glasses down and the
whole tray fell and water justwent everywhere all over. And I
kept my job. It's very gloriousand glamorous, but it's part of
(35:51):
how you pay your dues. I'llnever forget that but I've had
I've had some kitchen disasters,but that's something that I
remember from actually listeningto you and your story.
Chef Abbey (36:02):
Really quick if I go back to a kitchen disaster, it
was at school, actually, with myclass at the time. And this is
with two of my very closefriends. In class and we were in
America's cuisines with a reallywell known chef at the time. She
(36:24):
was rated to be one of the topteachers for the class and one
of the more difficult ones thatwere claiming are not me
specifically but my friend Diegointerested in and Mark are
cleaning the fryer and I thinkif anyone has experienced this,
they know how terrible thecleanup processes they dumped
(36:49):
the fryer oil all over and thenduring their process of mopping
it up, we're all watching thechef's just staring at them
waiting for them to be done. Sowe can end the class and they're
about to go push the mop bucketback to dump it and the mop
bucket temps all over the floor.
And so we watch them up again inwatching them take it to them
(37:14):
obscene thinking this is it.
They don't the mop bucket forthe third time in our watch. I
will never forget my chefs thelook on her face and the
disappointment and me knowing Itechnically I have to take the
heat as a team leader. Alright,come on guys. And knowing then,
(37:37):
like at the time they were justlaughing hysterically because at
that time there's like nothingelse to do. Because it was all
genuinely accidental. Just theworst three coincidence back to
back and that was definitelykitchen class disaster, that's
for sure but one that we lookback and laugh hysterically now.
Michael Dugan (37:58):
What's interesting is people may not
realize but if you're the lead,you might be graded on how you
react to that. Depend ondisaster and how you recover,
right?
Chef Abbey (38:10):
Yeah, were sort of laughing under their breath to
themselves and they had toshamelessly mop it up for the
second time.
Michael Dugan (38:24):
Yeah, I remember a lot of these things. I mean,
it's I think it's just so commonin industry and even in cooking
school. As we take this out. Doyou have any special message for
us that you want to share andhelp? How can we support you and
the culinary community?
Chef Abbey (38:42):
I would say that my special message that I have to
share for that the new incomingyoung chefs that are coming into
the industry and even the olderones is to never feel like you
aren't powerful enough to have avoice whether you're just
starting out or you're up at thetop you will always have a voice
(39:06):
and you will always have achance to speak up and you
should always speak up andempower yourself in the kitchen
as you want. To be empowered inreal life. And that's something
I'm currently trying to teachmyself and try to bring
awareness to others because Ithink we all have to realize our
(39:30):
strengths as individuals theyounger generation going into
the industry, we all have torealize how strong we are if we
come together and continue tospeak up and choir positive
changes for the industry thatwill do nothing but better the
world as it is and how we eat.
So that's my special message toeveryone.
Michael Dugan (39:54):
That's a great message. And I know people are
excited about this episode andthey want to connect with you.
How do they find you?
Chef Abbey (40:02):
The best way to connect with me currently is
both through my Instagramaccount, which is Chef Abby
Miller and that will give youthe ability to email me through
my email as well. And I alsolove to connect with people
through clubhouse so if you'dlike to also follow me on there,
(40:23):
join the club through thisreligion because not only will I
be talking about importantmental health issues, but you'll
come across so many people andso many topics that I'm sure any
one of you guys who arelistening right now will 100%
have a place in will be welcomedin to talk about whatever your
(40:43):
heart desires to talk about andget out there. Clubhouse or
Instagram just follow me backchanneling I'll usually answer
anyone back right away. I'mpretty quick on that.
Michael Dugan (40:54):
Chef Abbey, thank you so much for being a guest on
our show and you truly are aVoice4Chefs.
Chef Abbey (41:02):
Thank you so so much for having me. I'm so thankful I
connected with you throughclubhouse and now through this
amazing podcast, and I'm superexcited to work
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