September 10, 2023 • 31 mins
Ever felt awkward broaching the subject of budgets with your clients? Rest easy; we're here to guide you through it with empathy and professionalism. This episode removes the same of the budget conversation, and we discuss the pros and cons of asking about it upfront. We also delve into how to educate couples about the realities of wedding planning costs while ensuring they don't feel judged or uncomfortable.
Finally, we address the elephant in the room - Instagram. Its influence on wedding planning is undeniable, but beware of pitfalls. Don't let your desire to have the perfect Instagram Feed or to get published influence your decision to take on a client due to budget restrictions. Serving our clients with authenticity and being present with them is paramount. As we wrap up this enlightening discussion, we zoom out to a broader perspective of the wedding planning industry and how it can be more inclusive and kinder. Buckle up for a deep-dive into wedding budget convos, Instagram's impact, and a more compassionate industry!
www.cwpsociety.com | info@cwpsociety.com | IG: @cwpsociety | FB: @cwpsociety
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to the Wedding Planner podcast brought
to you by the Certified WeddingPlanner Society.
Welcome to the Wedding Plannerpodcast.
This is our Career SupportSeries and it's brought to you
by the Certified Wedding PlannerSociety.
(00:22):
We're the world's leadingwedding planner certification
program and the world's largestmembership of certified wedding
planners.
My name is Laurie Hartwell andI am the founder and CEO of the
Certified Wedding PlannerSociety, and I'm joined by my
fabulous Vice President, chrissyThomas, who is also the owner
of Southern Sparkle Weddings andEvents.
(00:43):
Hey, chrissy.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
Hi Laurie and hi everyone that is listening.
Today, we're going to betalking about budgets and how
you, as the wedding planner, caneducate your couples on what
they can expect to pay for theirwedding.
So this is a good topic.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
I think it's good and I think what we need to do is
maybe start from the verybeginning and think about when
our couples are firstapproaching us.
There are so many weddingplanners that ask on their
inquiry form, what their budgetis.
So I think you and I need totalk about some pros and cons as
to whether or not this is agood idea and how this can
(01:18):
actually hurt our weddingplanners in general.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
I think so, and one thing that automatically pops in
my head as a con is nine timesout of ten, they may be just
throwing a number to the walllike spaghetti and they're
hoping it sticks, because asengaged couples let's be honest
they're probably getting theirresearch from Google.
They're Googling their city,their state, what to expect from
(01:42):
our wedding budget, and we knowas wedding planners that the
bulk of the time is theinformation that they're getting
is more than likely not correctinformation.
So if we are initially askingthem for that budget from the
very beginning, their number maynot make sense because they
don't know any better.
And not only that.
I think too, Laurie.
I think this can possibly turnaway couples from filling out
(02:04):
the rest of the form.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
I know it would for me.
I don't think I would feelreally comfortable about that
because, number one, I don'teven know you yet.
You know, chrissy, if I waslooking into hiring you to be my
wedding planner and you'realready asking me how much money
I have to spend, I'm going tofeel judged a little bit.
So I think that that may not bea really great first place to
(02:27):
start.
Now, I'm not saying that weshouldn't have a discussion
about it.
I just don't think it shouldhappen on the online inquiry
form from our website, becausemany times what I'm noticing is
wedding planners are actuallymaking a decision on whether or
not to take that person'swedding based on the answer that
is given in that particularfield, on that form of what is
(02:50):
your budget.
Because if they put insomething like $10,000, there
are some planners that are like,well, I'm not even going to
have this conversation, but itkind of goes back to what you
just said they don't know theydon't know and, as wedding
planners, I think it'sultimately our job is to educate
them.
Speaker 2 (03:08):
I generally feel like our job is wedding planners.
Even though we're planningweddings, I feel like we're also
teachers.
It is our job to educatecouples on the realities of
wedding planning and what theycan possibly expect to spend in
their area.
And I think asking it on theinquiry form shuts that down,
where you don't get even theopportunity to educate them on
it.
And, like you said, lori, it'sokay to ask At some point.
(03:31):
That question does need to beasked because that's the best
way for you to kind of start theplanning process but build up
that relationship.
So when you have theconversation about money, it
doesn't feel like uncomfortable,it doesn't feel weird, it
doesn't feel icky for someonewho, like you said, they do not
know who you are.
But if you're having back andforth conversation with them and
(03:51):
they can't even get to know youa little bit better, your
couples are feeling morecomfortable talking with you.
Then, yes, go ahead and askthem what their budget is, but
don't let that numberautomatically turn you away from
taking on their wedding,because nine times out of 10,
the engaged couple has no cluehow much they're really going to
be have to spend on theirwedding.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
And it kind of works on every budget level too.
Chrissy, I'll tell you that Ihad a couple that had a very
nice budget.
When they first reached out tome, they told me that they had
$50,000 to spend.
When I asked more questionsduring the initial consultation,
I found out that they wanted400 people to come to the
wedding and they wanted it onNew Year's Eve and they wanted
(04:33):
it down in the key.
So I knew right away that$50,000 is not going to work.
So I'm educating couples, nomatter if they're coming to me
with a really, really low budgetor what sounds on paper Like
it's a nice budget, but, ofcourse, without any additional
questions.
I don't think it's fair to makethose kinds of determinations
(04:54):
before you even find, or atleast have an opportunity to
find, out, more information fromthem.
So when I was talking to thatcouple and I said, well, here's
the thing you're going toprobably be spending more than
double what you're mentioning tome now Let me kind of go into
why and then that's what I wasdoing, chrissy, kind of what you
(05:15):
were saying is educating themon why their budget is probably
going to need to go up just on aholiday alone, getting a
caterer to work and have todrive two hours from Miami to
get to the location down in thekeys on New Year's Eve no less.
But then you add the guestcount.
(05:36):
Forget it.
There's no way 50 grand isgoing to even come close to
covering it, and they ended upspending almost $400,000.
So it's not necessarily peopledon't have more, it's just that
they don't know that they mightneed more.
And that's where we come in.
So I personally, on acompletely separate note, don't
(05:59):
feel like we as wedding plannersshould even determine whether
or not we're willing to take ona client because of someone's
budget.
Do you think, chrissy, thatwedding planners should only
take budgets that would like getus the prettiest flowers, the
best bouquets and the nicestvenue?
Or do you think maybe weddingplanners should just take any
(06:22):
client that comes their way,obviously vetting them and
making sure that they're sane,but but you know, no matter what
the budget is, do you thinkthat we should just do our job
and not always be thinking aboutcan I get this particular
wedding published?
Speaker 2 (06:38):
Yeah, and I think what I'm seeing in our industry
is everyone has this mentalityof only wanting to take on these
high end luxury clients, and tome that is the 1%, and you can
have a few of those a year.
But in reality, the everydaycouple is still getting married,
the couple who are workingthere nine to five.
(06:58):
They are still getting marriedand those couples also deserve
wedding planners.
And you know, Lori, this bringsme back to when you first got
started, where and I'm going tothrow you under the bus here
back in what was that?
1780?
Speaker 1 (07:12):
Oh, my God, I keep getting, I keep getting.
Speaker 2 (07:15):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
I just saw me Like I feel like you keep going back a
century every time you bringthis up.
Originally it was 1921, then itwas 1847.
Now I'm in the 1700s.
I'm like what's happening here?
Speaker 2 (07:32):
Okay, Lori, that started 30 years ago.
She's been a part of thisindustry for 30 years but
initially, you know, during thattime period, wedding planners
were really thought to kind ofonly be for that hiring client.
And your goal is to allow andlet everyone know everyone
deserves a wedding planner.
And I think we were on thatpath where everyone was
(07:53):
realizing everyone could affordone, everyone could have one.
And now I feel like we'reshifting where it's like I feel
like I'm seeing a shift whereit's going back to only if you
have this much money to spend.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
Right.
How is that beneficial?
How is this supposed to benefitour industry?
Speaker 2 (08:09):
Industry, exactly, it's going to benefit our
industry it's.
All that is going to hurt ourindustry is if we, as wedding
planners, are not being morewell-rounded and taking on
clients with budgets all acrossthe spectrum.
And that's not saying that youdon't have to have your quote
ideal client.
But to me, when I think aboutmy personal ideal client, it
actually has absolutely nothingto do with how much money
(08:30):
they're spending on theirwedding.
It has everything to do withwhat kind of person they are,
how they treat me as a weddingplanner and if they're going to
work with wedding professionals,that's my ideal client.
So that means that I am takingon clients who have, as always,
$10,000 to spend upwards to$200,000 or, you know, $500,000,
whatever that looks like.
I have clients who are spendingit all, but it's going to make
(08:54):
sense for what their guestscount and what they're expecting
.
And I have been fortunateenough to have weddings featured
in national publications andit's been great.
That's it, it's just been great.
That doesn't get me business,it doesn't.
It just gives you clout, but itdoesn't make you a great
wedding planner.
It really doesn't.
This doesn't.
(09:14):
I know wedding planners whohave been featured in these huge
publications and I've seen acopy of their timeline and I'm
like huh.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
How did you make it?
How did you do that?
What is happening in yourbusiness right now?
Yeah, I actually agree with you, and I remember, you know, yeah
, I can remember back to the1700s, when I started planning
weddings.
Thank you for that and I put onmy my original website once.
You know, I actually did getstarted before websites were a
(09:44):
thing.
That's yes.
That is sad, and let's juststep over the.
When websites, though, became athing, and I got one, one of the
things that I made sure to puton there is everyone, no matter
your budget, deserves to hire amonth of coordinator or planner,
and I wanted to make sure thateveryone knew this, because I
(10:05):
knew that I could fit into thosebudgets.
Okay, I knew, because I wasdoing these weddings, and so I
wanted to teach other weddingplanners that why are you only
looking for the ones that aregoing to spend?
You know, at that time, let'sgo.
We're going to go back,honestly, to the 90s, the early
90s, the big, big budgets.
(10:26):
Back then, that was likespending 30 or 40,000.
Now, that's so, but back in theearly 90s, that was like, oh,
that's going to be a pretty nicewedding, and then I was
thinking to myself well, that'sgreat, but why can't the people
that really don't have very muchmoney?
(10:46):
Why can't they hire me too?
My prices weren't astronomical.
I've never wanted to pricemyself outside of what the
average person can actuallyafford, and so I wanted to make
sure that I price myself to wear.
Not just the rich but the poorcan also have some sort of or
(11:09):
some level of my service.
So I always said I'm going tobe able to fit in your budget.
I will make sure that I find away to fit in your budget.
Now, does that mean I'm goingto modify a package?
Absolutely, if I have to modifya package to reduce my rate so
that someone can have someonethere to set up for their
wedding if not to coordinate orplan, but at least to set up and
(11:31):
make sure everything isproperly done so that they can
have a nice day.
Or maybe they want me to set upand just get everybody down the
aisle and let the venue takeover from there.
Whatever it was, I was willingto modify things because I felt
like they deserved to havesomeone there, if that's what
they wanted.
But I find today that you'reright.
Wedding planners, back in theday, we were fighting to be able
(11:53):
to fit inside of the minds ofthe average couple.
Like you can afford us.
You should all have at least uson a month of basis or you know
for to kind of wrap up all ofthose details leading up to your
wedding and then executing areally beautiful day, and I feel
like we were finally gettingsomewhere.
(12:14):
And then, all of a sudden, thatshift that you were speaking of
, I would say happened aboutthree years ago, where it's like
all of these educators werecoming out of the woodwork and
saying here's the way to becomea luxury wedding planner.
I'm thinking to myself we shouldall be luxury wedding planners,
whether they have big budgetsor low budgets.
(12:37):
I want to be a luxury plannerfor everybody because I'm going
to give a luxury service.
No matter how much someone hasto spend on their overall
wedding.
They're spending the same on meregardless.
So I think that we have toconsider that.
But you know, everybody hasdifferent viewpoints and I get
it.
I just don't think you're goingto be a well-rounded wedding
(12:57):
planner if you're only focusedon one type of budget and if
you're making money the toppriority.
I think you should alwaysstrive to make as much money as
possible.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
And what I love to that you mentioned is that you
still price yourself where, likeyou said, everyone could afford
you.
So we're not telling you to.
You know, charge $200 for amonth of coordination package.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
That's not what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
We're saying you know , stay within the averages, but
if you have to modify, modifylike you mentioned, like you can
, where you leave earlier theother day.
I love that you mentioned that,because there's a way where you
can adjust your packages toreflect what the services that
your client needs withoutsacrificing how much money
you're making as a weddingplanner.
(13:41):
I love that you mentioned that.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
Otherwise, you're leaving money on the table,
Chrissy, and so so many weddingplanners are complaining like,
oh, I'm just not getting them ona business that I want.
It's because you're turningaway business because someone is
telling you that they only have10,000, 15,000, $20,000 to
spend there.
You should have a package priceor some set of services that
(14:08):
can fit within that person'sbudget.
Otherwise, you are leavingmoney on the table and you are
not going to have the revenue inwhich you are craving to have.
We need to have differentlevels of services.
That way, we can reacheverybody from every single
budget price point.
We need to just be thinkingabout all of that.
I truly believe that we, aswedding planners, need to think
(14:34):
less about budget.
We have our pricing.
We know what we are worth.
Going back to you mentioning weare not suggesting that you
charge $200 or even just $1,000for your month of or wedding day
management services.
Everybody calls it different.
I try to make sure that I amkeeping it all in, but whatever
(14:56):
your lowest actual package isthat includes wedding day
management services, you reallyneed to make sure that you are
getting paid exactly what youare worth and know that you are
able to pay your bills.
Now, once that is established,why are you turning away
business?
(15:17):
I had a couple that had a $3,000budget to spend on their
wedding and my this now is weare going to go back.
This is the early 2000s.
Okay, my lowest package at thetime was $1,400.
And they said we want you.
And I said now, that is goingto eat up about half of your
(15:40):
budget.
And they said we will come upwith another.
However much we need to come upwith, but we want you.
So I didn't sacrifice myself.
I was willing to maybe just sayI'll set up, or maybe you just
need coordination services.
Only if you don't want any setup, Like, what are you looking
for?
What do you need?
But then they said no, I wantthe whole wedding day management
(16:02):
package and we'll just figureout the rest.
Well, I was able to only get itto wear it because they just
wanted 25 people at a cutelittle picnic in a park.
I made it all happen with onlyan additional $500 on top of
what they you know.
So it's $3,500.
I made it work.
Now, was that really hard?
Yes, but I made it work becauseI told them you're going to
(16:27):
have to make some sacrifices,especially if you're willing to
pay me this much and you'rewanting me to stay as close to
the three grand as possible.
That's going to be challenging,to say the least, but I pulled
in a lot of favors for thatparticular couple, and so I feel
like today, wedding plannersare not utilizing all of their
(16:47):
resources and tools and arejudging people based on how much
money they have, and they arenot getting creative and
resourceful on how to createwedding days for people who are
not incredibly wealthy.
Speaker 2 (17:02):
And what I love about that story too, lori, is that
you did not dismiss them.
You did not make them feelsmall or less than because their
budget was only $3,000.
And I I see that.
I see that in forms, I see thaton social media, where people
are wedding planners even arebeing nasty and rude about how
(17:22):
much someone is spending ontheir wedding, and that is so
unnecessary and it really makesme sad.
And there's a way for YouTubeeducate clients about their
budget without belittling themand without making them feel
less than.
Yeah, sort of called for.
Speaker 1 (17:39):
Let's talk about how to educate our couples.
You know we'll start at theinitial consultation, because
that's the true time that I'mactually talking to them about
their budget.
I'm not asking them what theirbudget is on their inquiry form.
I am waiting to have thoseconversations a little bit later
.
I have the real importantconversations ahead of that
initial consultation.
For instance, who, whichwedding professionals did you
(18:02):
hire?
So if you guys want to know howto vet professionals and vet
couples, look at some of ourprevious podcasts, because we
talk about alarm bells orwedding bells.
That was the vetting thecouples and then we talked about
vetting wedding professionals.
So check those out if you havenot already done so.
But I am asking all of thosequestions to me.
The budget question needs to bea personal one on one
(18:24):
conversation, not a question.
I ask on a forum and not aquestion.
I'm going to ask an emailbefore they even have a chance
to meet me and see that myintentions toward them are good.
Ok, so when we're at initialconsultations, I'm asking OK, so
how much were you planning onspending for this?
Now, chrissy, if they give youa number based, you know and you
(18:46):
hear it and you go who?
I don't think that's going towork, based on you know how many
guests that they're expecting,or where they're wanting to get
married, or what have you.
What do you say to them?
Speaker 2 (18:56):
At that point I do look at those two things, like
you mentioned, where they'regoing to have the wedding and
their guest count.
To me those come hand in hand.
Those essentially make up theirbudget.
It reminds me like what camefirst the chicken or the egg,
what came first the budget orthe guest count.
So I let them know.
You know, based off myexperience as a planner in this
location, and based on yourguest count and the number that
she gave me, I think we may needto adjust, and here's why and
(19:20):
then kind of give them someestimates.
And that's where, as thewedding planner, you're going to
want to make sure that you'rean expert about your wedding
market and that you know theaverages of every single wedding
vendor in your area not everysingle wedding vendor, but every
single vendor category.
So you know the average cost ofthe photographers in your area,
you know the average cost ofthe catering and bakers and
(19:43):
rentals, so that way you caneducate your clients and do so
in a way where you're speakingthe truth, you're speaking
knowledge, but I'm doing it in avery kind and not belittling
way.
I'm doing it in just kind of aknowledge based tone of like
okay, so on average with yourguest count, this is how much my
clients will typically spend onflowers.
(20:03):
You know, we'll think about it.
You've got 30 tables.
We need 30 centerpieces.
On average, centerpieces can bethis much.
You've got six bridesmaids Onaverage bridesmaids, we can call
this cost this much.
And in my head you know I'mdoing math that's a lie.
I don't do math in my headbecause math is not a strong
suit I do have my indidenticcalculator out and I'm crunching
(20:24):
numbers and letting them know.
You know, based off your bestof all this information, this is
probably where your budget maymore than likely be.
But don't worry, when you hireme as your wedding planner, we
can break this down even more,because I wanna talk to you
about what your priorities are.
So if you don't wanna havethese huge centerpieces, but you
rather have a phenomenalcaterer, then we can shift your
budget and make sure that yourneeds and your priorities are
(20:46):
met, because not every singleclient and not every single
couple is the same.
They may have differentpriorities.
That's where their budget canbe different and be adjusted to
what their needs and what theirpriorities are.
So I let them know when youhire me.
This is something that we'lldiscuss in full detail, but this
is kind of what the average istypically look like.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
Right, because they may not have a huge priority for
really pretty centerpieces.
Maybe they already havepurchased something.
They already have somethingthat they wanna put on the
tables, or maybe they have acompletely different idea, so
that's gonna save on that budgetalone.
Then maybe they are thinkingthat a completely different way
to go as far as catering isconcerned.
(21:29):
Maybe they have somethingdifferent in mind than what we
would have maybe chosen for them.
And I think that that's reallythe key here, chrissy, is we as
wedding planners need to kind oftake ourselves out of the
equation a little bit.
We need to be observers, weneed to be listeners and we need
to help guide our couples.
Rather than projecting what wethink they should have and how
(21:52):
we think that wedding shouldlook and how much we think they
should spend on any given vendorcategory, because when you
project that onto others, is itnow their wedding?
Because I don't really think itis.
Now it becomes our wedding.
We have to step back a littlebit and allow the couple to tell
(22:12):
us what they want us to do andwhat kind of wedding they want
us to provide.
Now I'm always gonna give greatsuggestions and see, kind of
throwing something at the wallsee if it sticks, like if
they're excited about it, thengreat, that's wonderful.
But I just don't think that weas planners have the right to
dictate to a couple what theyshouldn't shouldn't have in
(22:34):
regards to flowers versus justcandles, or a beautiful arch
versus no arch at all.
Why does it matter to us?
The only reason why it wouldmatter to us is if we have in
the back of our mind that everysingle wedding we do, we have to
try and get it published.
Well, now you're losing out onactually creating really
(22:55):
beautiful relationships withyour couples, because now all
you care about is you and howyou are going to be perceived.
How about?
Care enough about the couple,what it is that they want, and
give them the wedding that theyare looking for.
Regardless of how you may ormay not benefit, you already did
benefit.
You got paid to do the jobExactly.
You got paid.
(23:15):
If you pay me, I will give youwhat you want Now, not if it's
gonna sacrifice my reputation.
There are certain things thatI'm not going to do.
For instance, I'm not gonna setup in front of guests.
I'm not going to be okay with acouple saying we only wanna
provide seating for half of our150 guests for dinner.
(23:38):
No, no, we need seating for all.
That's why we're not gonna havea half and half situation here.
There's gonna be certain thingswhere I'm gonna be like, okay,
that's gonna affect myreputation, but if it's just the
overall aesthetic, come on.
Why do we have to care so muchabout that?
Let's just give these coupleswhat they need and what they
(24:00):
want and back off a little bitand stop caring so much about
but how am I gonna get public?
So I'm not gonna be able topost anything about that.
Speaker 2 (24:09):
That's the biggest like how am I gonna put this?
This is gonna mess up myInstagram feed.
Who cares?
Speaker 1 (24:14):
You're like, if you're only in business because
of your Instagram feed, you arenot in the right business.
You're not supposed to beplanning wedding specifically
for that purpose You're supposedto be.
And I bet you, chrissy, if anywedding planner is asking
themselves, why did I get intothis industry in the first place
, why did I wanna become awedding planner?
Almost all of them will saywell, in the beginning it was
(24:37):
just because I loved love.
I wanted to help couples bringtheir wedding dreams to life.
Okay, so when did it switchthen from that?
Because everybody has their ownwedding dreams.
Right To it has to be mywedding dream for your event.
And I'm gonna be really a bigstickler on how pretty
(24:58):
everything is because I caremore about my Instagram feed.
It can't be about that.
Speaker 2 (25:04):
And I think what's happening is because of
Instagram.
We're playing the comparisongame, where we're following all
of these big publications thatare featuring nothing but these
high-end weddings and we'rethinking, well, am I wanting to?
Don't look like that, am Idoing something wrong?
And then we're giving.
Some of our planners aregetting education from educators
(25:25):
who that's all they'repreaching.
So it's blurring the lines ofwhat we should be as white
entrepreneurs and what, like yousaid, what our initial reason
was for getting in this industry.
Speaker 1 (25:38):
I really I really can appreciate that and I really
think that we need to kind of goback in time.
You know, when I first startedplanning events in the 1700s,
there was no fix, there was nosuch thing as Instagram, and I
felt like I was able toexperience a couple's event in a
(25:59):
completely different way.
It's because I wasn't motivatedby how I was going to be
perceived by others.
I got to be present.
It's kind of like now going toa concert If you go to a concert
, if you went to a concert backin the year 2000, versus going
to a concert in 2023, let metell you the main difference
(26:21):
between those two experiences.
The first experience, back in2000, you were present, you were
in the moment, you werewatching the band on stage.
If you're at a concert today,everybody has their phone out
and they are viewing the concertthrough the lens of their phone
, watching the band on stage,and they're not being present in
(26:44):
that moment.
And I feel like that's what'shappening with weddings back in
the day, for wedding plannersthat are not feeling as though
everything has to be publishedand perceived.
They're just there to give aservice that they are being paid
for and they are in the moment.
They're in the present momentwith that couple, versus the
type of wedding planner thatsees everything through the lens
(27:07):
of Instagram and publications.
I feel as though we, as anindustry of wedding planners,
need to move away from that andI think, right, yes, if you have
an amazing wedding, surepublish it, put it all over
social media, but if you have acouple that you're like, I just
loved them and maybe, maybe justpost a picture of you with the
(27:32):
couple or do a couple of sillypictures with you and the couple
just to have some fun, there'salways a different angle you can
take.
If it's not like one of theprettiest weddings you've ever
produced, and not because of thefault of the wedding planners,
just maybe the couple didn'thave a lot of money.
And I'll be honest, chrissy,I've done weddings.
Like I said, my lowest budgetwas $3,000.
(27:53):
I've done multimillion dollarcelebrity weddings.
I don't care, none of itmatters.
I cared about the people.
I cared about their experience.
I wanted to provide a luxuryexperience, no matter how much
they had to spend.
They spent the same amount ofmoney on me and that's the
difference.
(28:13):
Here they're getting paid.
Why do you need more?
So I think that it's importantthat we just stay present and
stop making it about the budget,but I think it is wise to
always educate your couples onthe budget and they might say to
you yeah, okay, so I didn'trealize that it was going to
cost us this much, so we may notbe able to get the wedding that
(28:34):
we were hoping for.
That, by the way, right, thereis an opportunity.
We can take that as anopportunity and say, oh, we can
still get you a fabulous wedding.
It's just that now you're goingto need to kind of some of my
know-how and I'm still sellingthem on me.
I you're going to need myknow-how because I have given
weddings where you wouldn'tbelieve what I've pulled out
(28:56):
before, because of myconnections, because I know some
tips and tricks.
So I think we can stillaccomplish what you're looking
for with the lower budget, butwe're going to have to make some
adjustments.
Maybe we're going to need tocut a little bit of the guest
list.
Maybe we're going to need toget incredibly creative with
this, this and this.
If you're willing to do it, Iam willing to be in this journey
with you.
(29:17):
Here are my fees, here are myservices.
Let's go through them and I canwalk you through what I can do
for you based on everything Inow know.
You should still sell yourself.
I still booked almost everysingle wedding couple that sat
in front of me because I didn'tjudge them on their budget.
I educated them and thenfigured out a way that I could
(29:40):
help them in another way.
Speaker 2 (29:42):
I think what sums this up for me is you, as a
wedding planner.
We should not let someone'sbudget impact the service that
we provide or how we treat them.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (29:52):
I think that that's good advice and I think that's
probably where we could evenleave it, because we want to
make sure that we are loving ourjob and remembering why we got
into this career path in thefirst place.
It's because we love love.
We love events, we loveproviding a once in a lifetime
experience for two people whohave fallen in love, and it's
(30:15):
the first day of their entirelife together.
That is one of the mostincredible, most amazing
experiences that we are paid tobe a part of.
Do you know what kind of crazyhonor that is?
That's insane.
It's huge.
I think what we need to do is,just as an industry, step back.
(30:36):
Let's analyze what it is thatwe're doing, what our priorities
are, and remember being awedding planner is not just for
the wealthy, it is for everybody.
Let's be more well-rounded,let's be kinder, let's help
educate our couples.
Let's educate ourselves so thatwe understand how we can show
up better at initialconsultations and be less judgy
(30:58):
of other wedding planners aswell as our couples that have a
little bit of a lower budgetthan what we've deemed is
appropriate.
Thank you all for listening tothe Wedding Planner Podcast If
you're not yet a member of theCertified Wedding Planner
Society.
We would love to welcome youinto our amazing and loving
family.
You can find more informationabout us on our website,
(31:19):
weddingplanarsystietycom.
I hope all of you have anamazing day.
Welcome to the Wedding Planner podcast brought
to you by the Certified WeddingPlanner Society.
Welcome to the Wedding Plannerpodcast.
This is our Career SupportSeries and it's brought to you
by the Certified Wedding PlannerSociety.
(00:22):
We're the world's leadingwedding planner certification
program and the world's largestmembership of certified wedding
planners.
My name is Laurie Hartwell andI am the founder and CEO of the
Certified Wedding PlannerSociety, and I'm joined by my
fabulous Vice President, chrissyThomas, who is also the owner
of Southern Sparkle Weddings andEvents.
(00:43):
Hey, chrissy.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
Hi Laurie and hi everyone that is listening.
Today, we're going to betalking about budgets and how
you, as the wedding planner, caneducate your couples on what
they can expect to pay for theirwedding.
So this is a good topic.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
I think it's good and I think what we need to do is
maybe start from the verybeginning and think about when
our couples are firstapproaching us.
There are so many weddingplanners that ask on their
inquiry form, what their budgetis.
So I think you and I need totalk about some pros and cons as
to whether or not this is agood idea and how this can
(01:18):
actually hurt our weddingplanners in general.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
I think so, and one thing that automatically pops in
my head as a con is nine timesout of ten, they may be just
throwing a number to the walllike spaghetti and they're
hoping it sticks, because asengaged couples let's be honest
they're probably getting theirresearch from Google.
They're Googling their city,their state, what to expect from
(01:42):
our wedding budget, and we knowas wedding planners that the
bulk of the time is theinformation that they're getting
is more than likely not correctinformation.
So if we are initially askingthem for that budget from the
very beginning, their number maynot make sense because they
don't know any better.
And not only that.
I think too, Laurie.
I think this can possibly turnaway couples from filling out
(02:04):
the rest of the form.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
I know it would for me.
I don't think I would feelreally comfortable about that
because, number one, I don'teven know you yet.
You know, chrissy, if I waslooking into hiring you to be my
wedding planner and you'realready asking me how much money
I have to spend, I'm going tofeel judged a little bit.
So I think that that may not bea really great first place to
(02:27):
start.
Now, I'm not saying that weshouldn't have a discussion
about it.
I just don't think it shouldhappen on the online inquiry
form from our website, becausemany times what I'm noticing is
wedding planners are actuallymaking a decision on whether or
not to take that person'swedding based on the answer that
is given in that particularfield, on that form of what is
(02:50):
your budget.
Because if they put insomething like $10,000, there
are some planners that are like,well, I'm not even going to
have this conversation, but itkind of goes back to what you
just said they don't know theydon't know and, as wedding
planners, I think it'sultimately our job is to educate
them.
Speaker 2 (03:08):
I generally feel like our job is wedding planners.
Even though we're planningweddings, I feel like we're also
teachers.
It is our job to educatecouples on the realities of
wedding planning and what theycan possibly expect to spend in
their area.
And I think asking it on theinquiry form shuts that down,
where you don't get even theopportunity to educate them on
it.
And, like you said, lori, it'sokay to ask At some point.
(03:31):
That question does need to beasked because that's the best
way for you to kind of start theplanning process but build up
that relationship.
So when you have theconversation about money, it
doesn't feel like uncomfortable,it doesn't feel weird, it
doesn't feel icky for someonewho, like you said, they do not
know who you are.
But if you're having back andforth conversation with them and
(03:51):
they can't even get to know youa little bit better, your
couples are feeling morecomfortable talking with you.
Then, yes, go ahead and askthem what their budget is, but
don't let that numberautomatically turn you away from
taking on their wedding,because nine times out of 10,
the engaged couple has no cluehow much they're really going to
be have to spend on theirwedding.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
And it kind of works on every budget level too.
Chrissy, I'll tell you that Ihad a couple that had a very
nice budget.
When they first reached out tome, they told me that they had
$50,000 to spend.
When I asked more questionsduring the initial consultation,
I found out that they wanted400 people to come to the
wedding and they wanted it onNew Year's Eve and they wanted
(04:33):
it down in the key.
So I knew right away that$50,000 is not going to work.
So I'm educating couples, nomatter if they're coming to me
with a really, really low budgetor what sounds on paper Like
it's a nice budget, but, ofcourse, without any additional
questions.
I don't think it's fair to makethose kinds of determinations
(04:54):
before you even find, or atleast have an opportunity to
find, out, more information fromthem.
So when I was talking to thatcouple and I said, well, here's
the thing you're going toprobably be spending more than
double what you're mentioning tome now Let me kind of go into
why and then that's what I wasdoing, chrissy, kind of what you
(05:15):
were saying is educating themon why their budget is probably
going to need to go up just on aholiday alone, getting a
caterer to work and have todrive two hours from Miami to
get to the location down in thekeys on New Year's Eve no less.
But then you add the guestcount.
(05:36):
Forget it.
There's no way 50 grand isgoing to even come close to
covering it, and they ended upspending almost $400,000.
So it's not necessarily peopledon't have more, it's just that
they don't know that they mightneed more.
And that's where we come in.
So I personally, on acompletely separate note, don't
(05:59):
feel like we as wedding plannersshould even determine whether
or not we're willing to take ona client because of someone's
budget.
Do you think, chrissy, thatwedding planners should only
take budgets that would like getus the prettiest flowers, the
best bouquets and the nicestvenue?
Or do you think maybe weddingplanners should just take any
(06:22):
client that comes their way,obviously vetting them and
making sure that they're sane,but but you know, no matter what
the budget is, do you thinkthat we should just do our job
and not always be thinking aboutcan I get this particular
wedding published?
Speaker 2 (06:38):
Yeah, and I think what I'm seeing in our industry
is everyone has this mentalityof only wanting to take on these
high end luxury clients, and tome that is the 1%, and you can
have a few of those a year.
But in reality, the everydaycouple is still getting married,
the couple who are workingthere nine to five.
(06:58):
They are still getting marriedand those couples also deserve
wedding planners.
And you know, Lori, this bringsme back to when you first got
started, where and I'm going tothrow you under the bus here
back in what was that?
1780?
Speaker 1 (07:12):
Oh, my God, I keep getting, I keep getting.
Speaker 2 (07:15):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
I just saw me Like I feel like you keep going back a
century every time you bringthis up.
Originally it was 1921, then itwas 1847.
Now I'm in the 1700s.
I'm like what's happening here?
Speaker 2 (07:32):
Okay, Lori, that started 30 years ago.
She's been a part of thisindustry for 30 years but
initially, you know, during thattime period, wedding planners
were really thought to kind ofonly be for that hiring client.
And your goal is to allow andlet everyone know everyone
deserves a wedding planner.
And I think we were on thatpath where everyone was
(07:53):
realizing everyone could affordone, everyone could have one.
And now I feel like we'reshifting where it's like I feel
like I'm seeing a shift whereit's going back to only if you
have this much money to spend.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
Right.
How is that beneficial?
How is this supposed to benefitour industry?
Speaker 2 (08:09):
Industry, exactly, it's going to benefit our
industry it's.
All that is going to hurt ourindustry is if we, as wedding
planners, are not being morewell-rounded and taking on
clients with budgets all acrossthe spectrum.
And that's not saying that youdon't have to have your quote
ideal client.
But to me, when I think aboutmy personal ideal client, it
actually has absolutely nothingto do with how much money
(08:30):
they're spending on theirwedding.
It has everything to do withwhat kind of person they are,
how they treat me as a weddingplanner and if they're going to
work with wedding professionals,that's my ideal client.
So that means that I am takingon clients who have, as always,
$10,000 to spend upwards to$200,000 or, you know, $500,000,
whatever that looks like.
I have clients who are spendingit all, but it's going to make
(08:54):
sense for what their guestscount and what they're expecting
.
And I have been fortunateenough to have weddings featured
in national publications andit's been great.
That's it, it's just been great.
That doesn't get me business,it doesn't.
It just gives you clout, but itdoesn't make you a great
wedding planner.
It really doesn't.
This doesn't.
(09:14):
I know wedding planners whohave been featured in these huge
publications and I've seen acopy of their timeline and I'm
like huh.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
How did you make it?
How did you do that?
What is happening in yourbusiness right now?
Yeah, I actually agree with you, and I remember, you know, yeah
, I can remember back to the1700s, when I started planning
weddings.
Thank you for that and I put onmy my original website once.
You know, I actually did getstarted before websites were a
(09:44):
thing.
That's yes.
That is sad, and let's juststep over the.
When websites, though, became athing, and I got one, one of the
things that I made sure to puton there is everyone, no matter
your budget, deserves to hire amonth of coordinator or planner,
and I wanted to make sure thateveryone knew this, because I
(10:05):
knew that I could fit into thosebudgets.
Okay, I knew, because I wasdoing these weddings, and so I
wanted to teach other weddingplanners that why are you only
looking for the ones that aregoing to spend?
You know, at that time, let'sgo.
We're going to go back,honestly, to the 90s, the early
90s, the big, big budgets.
(10:26):
Back then, that was likespending 30 or 40,000.
Now, that's so, but back in theearly 90s, that was like, oh,
that's going to be a pretty nicewedding, and then I was
thinking to myself well, that'sgreat, but why can't the people
that really don't have very muchmoney?
(10:46):
Why can't they hire me too?
My prices weren't astronomical.
I've never wanted to pricemyself outside of what the
average person can actuallyafford, and so I wanted to make
sure that I price myself to wear.
Not just the rich but the poorcan also have some sort of or
(11:09):
some level of my service.
So I always said I'm going tobe able to fit in your budget.
I will make sure that I find away to fit in your budget.
Now, does that mean I'm goingto modify a package?
Absolutely, if I have to modifya package to reduce my rate so
that someone can have someonethere to set up for their
wedding if not to coordinate orplan, but at least to set up and
(11:31):
make sure everything isproperly done so that they can
have a nice day.
Or maybe they want me to set upand just get everybody down the
aisle and let the venue takeover from there.
Whatever it was, I was willingto modify things because I felt
like they deserved to havesomeone there, if that's what
they wanted.
But I find today that you'reright.
Wedding planners, back in theday, we were fighting to be able
(11:53):
to fit inside of the minds ofthe average couple.
Like you can afford us.
You should all have at least uson a month of basis or you know
for to kind of wrap up all ofthose details leading up to your
wedding and then executing areally beautiful day, and I feel
like we were finally gettingsomewhere.
(12:14):
And then, all of a sudden, thatshift that you were speaking of
, I would say happened aboutthree years ago, where it's like
all of these educators werecoming out of the woodwork and
saying here's the way to becomea luxury wedding planner.
I'm thinking to myself we shouldall be luxury wedding planners,
whether they have big budgetsor low budgets.
(12:37):
I want to be a luxury plannerfor everybody because I'm going
to give a luxury service.
No matter how much someone hasto spend on their overall
wedding.
They're spending the same on meregardless.
So I think that we have toconsider that.
But you know, everybody hasdifferent viewpoints and I get
it.
I just don't think you're goingto be a well-rounded wedding
(12:57):
planner if you're only focusedon one type of budget and if
you're making money the toppriority.
I think you should alwaysstrive to make as much money as
possible.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
And what I love to that you mentioned is that you
still price yourself where, likeyou said, everyone could afford
you.
So we're not telling you to.
You know, charge $200 for amonth of coordination package.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
That's not what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
We're saying you know , stay within the averages, but
if you have to modify, modifylike you mentioned, like you can
, where you leave earlier theother day.
I love that you mentioned that,because there's a way where you
can adjust your packages toreflect what the services that
your client needs withoutsacrificing how much money
you're making as a weddingplanner.
(13:41):
I love that you mentioned that.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
Otherwise, you're leaving money on the table,
Chrissy, and so so many weddingplanners are complaining like,
oh, I'm just not getting them ona business that I want.
It's because you're turningaway business because someone is
telling you that they only have10,000, 15,000, $20,000 to
spend there.
You should have a package priceor some set of services that
(14:08):
can fit within that person'sbudget.
Otherwise, you are leavingmoney on the table and you are
not going to have the revenue inwhich you are craving to have.
We need to have differentlevels of services.
That way, we can reacheverybody from every single
budget price point.
We need to just be thinkingabout all of that.
I truly believe that we, aswedding planners, need to think
(14:34):
less about budget.
We have our pricing.
We know what we are worth.
Going back to you mentioning weare not suggesting that you
charge $200 or even just $1,000for your month of or wedding day
management services.
Everybody calls it different.
I try to make sure that I amkeeping it all in, but whatever
(14:56):
your lowest actual package isthat includes wedding day
management services, you reallyneed to make sure that you are
getting paid exactly what youare worth and know that you are
able to pay your bills.
Now, once that is established,why are you turning away
business?
(15:17):
I had a couple that had a $3,000budget to spend on their
wedding and my this now is weare going to go back.
This is the early 2000s.
Okay, my lowest package at thetime was $1,400.
And they said we want you.
And I said now, that is goingto eat up about half of your
(15:40):
budget.
And they said we will come upwith another.
However much we need to come upwith, but we want you.
So I didn't sacrifice myself.
I was willing to maybe just sayI'll set up, or maybe you just
need coordination services.
Only if you don't want any setup, Like, what are you looking
for?
What do you need?
But then they said no, I wantthe whole wedding day management
(16:02):
package and we'll just figureout the rest.
Well, I was able to only get itto wear it because they just
wanted 25 people at a cutelittle picnic in a park.
I made it all happen with onlyan additional $500 on top of
what they you know.
So it's $3,500.
I made it work.
Now, was that really hard?
Yes, but I made it work becauseI told them you're going to
(16:27):
have to make some sacrifices,especially if you're willing to
pay me this much and you'rewanting me to stay as close to
the three grand as possible.
That's going to be challenging,to say the least, but I pulled
in a lot of favors for thatparticular couple, and so I feel
like today, wedding plannersare not utilizing all of their
(16:47):
resources and tools and arejudging people based on how much
money they have, and they arenot getting creative and
resourceful on how to createwedding days for people who are
not incredibly wealthy.
Speaker 2 (17:02):
And what I love about that story too, lori, is that
you did not dismiss them.
You did not make them feelsmall or less than because their
budget was only $3,000.
And I I see that.
I see that in forms, I see thaton social media, where people
are wedding planners even arebeing nasty and rude about how
(17:22):
much someone is spending ontheir wedding, and that is so
unnecessary and it really makesme sad.
And there's a way for YouTubeeducate clients about their
budget without belittling themand without making them feel
less than.
Yeah, sort of called for.
Speaker 1 (17:39):
Let's talk about how to educate our couples.
You know we'll start at theinitial consultation, because
that's the true time that I'mactually talking to them about
their budget.
I'm not asking them what theirbudget is on their inquiry form.
I am waiting to have thoseconversations a little bit later
.
I have the real importantconversations ahead of that
initial consultation.
For instance, who, whichwedding professionals did you
(18:02):
hire?
So if you guys want to know howto vet professionals and vet
couples, look at some of ourprevious podcasts, because we
talk about alarm bells orwedding bells.
That was the vetting thecouples and then we talked about
vetting wedding professionals.
So check those out if you havenot already done so.
But I am asking all of thosequestions to me.
The budget question needs to bea personal one on one
(18:24):
conversation, not a question.
I ask on a forum and not aquestion.
I'm going to ask an emailbefore they even have a chance
to meet me and see that myintentions toward them are good.
Ok, so when we're at initialconsultations, I'm asking OK, so
how much were you planning onspending for this?
Now, chrissy, if they give youa number based, you know and you
(18:46):
hear it and you go who?
I don't think that's going towork, based on you know how many
guests that they're expecting,or where they're wanting to get
married, or what have you.
What do you say to them?
Speaker 2 (18:56):
At that point I do look at those two things, like
you mentioned, where they'regoing to have the wedding and
their guest count.
To me those come hand in hand.
Those essentially make up theirbudget.
It reminds me like what camefirst the chicken or the egg,
what came first the budget orthe guest count.
So I let them know.
You know, based off myexperience as a planner in this
location, and based on yourguest count and the number that
she gave me, I think we may needto adjust, and here's why and
(19:20):
then kind of give them someestimates.
And that's where, as thewedding planner, you're going to
want to make sure that you'rean expert about your wedding
market and that you know theaverages of every single wedding
vendor in your area not everysingle wedding vendor, but every
single vendor category.
So you know the average cost ofthe photographers in your area,
you know the average cost ofthe catering and bakers and
(19:43):
rentals, so that way you caneducate your clients and do so
in a way where you're speakingthe truth, you're speaking
knowledge, but I'm doing it in avery kind and not belittling
way.
I'm doing it in just kind of aknowledge based tone of like
okay, so on average with yourguest count, this is how much my
clients will typically spend onflowers.
(20:03):
You know, we'll think about it.
You've got 30 tables.
We need 30 centerpieces.
On average, centerpieces can bethis much.
You've got six bridesmaids Onaverage bridesmaids, we can call
this cost this much.
And in my head you know I'mdoing math that's a lie.
I don't do math in my headbecause math is not a strong
suit I do have my indidenticcalculator out and I'm crunching
(20:24):
numbers and letting them know.
You know, based off your bestof all this information, this is
probably where your budget maymore than likely be.
But don't worry, when you hireme as your wedding planner, we
can break this down even more,because I wanna talk to you
about what your priorities are.
So if you don't wanna havethese huge centerpieces, but you
rather have a phenomenalcaterer, then we can shift your
budget and make sure that yourneeds and your priorities are
(20:46):
met, because not every singleclient and not every single
couple is the same.
They may have differentpriorities.
That's where their budget canbe different and be adjusted to
what their needs and what theirpriorities are.
So I let them know when youhire me.
This is something that we'lldiscuss in full detail, but this
is kind of what the average istypically look like.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
Right, because they may not have a huge priority for
really pretty centerpieces.
Maybe they already havepurchased something.
They already have somethingthat they wanna put on the
tables, or maybe they have acompletely different idea, so
that's gonna save on that budgetalone.
Then maybe they are thinkingthat a completely different way
to go as far as catering isconcerned.
(21:29):
Maybe they have somethingdifferent in mind than what we
would have maybe chosen for them.
And I think that that's reallythe key here, chrissy, is we as
wedding planners need to kind oftake ourselves out of the
equation a little bit.
We need to be observers, weneed to be listeners and we need
to help guide our couples.
Rather than projecting what wethink they should have and how
(21:52):
we think that wedding shouldlook and how much we think they
should spend on any given vendorcategory, because when you
project that onto others, is itnow their wedding?
Because I don't really think itis.
Now it becomes our wedding.
We have to step back a littlebit and allow the couple to tell
(22:12):
us what they want us to do andwhat kind of wedding they want
us to provide.
Now I'm always gonna give greatsuggestions and see, kind of
throwing something at the wallsee if it sticks, like if
they're excited about it, thengreat, that's wonderful.
But I just don't think that weas planners have the right to
dictate to a couple what theyshouldn't shouldn't have in
(22:34):
regards to flowers versus justcandles, or a beautiful arch
versus no arch at all.
Why does it matter to us?
The only reason why it wouldmatter to us is if we have in
the back of our mind that everysingle wedding we do, we have to
try and get it published.
Well, now you're losing out onactually creating really
(22:55):
beautiful relationships withyour couples, because now all
you care about is you and howyou are going to be perceived.
How about?
Care enough about the couple,what it is that they want, and
give them the wedding that theyare looking for.
Regardless of how you may ormay not benefit, you already did
benefit.
You got paid to do the jobExactly.
You got paid.
(23:15):
If you pay me, I will give youwhat you want Now, not if it's
gonna sacrifice my reputation.
There are certain things thatI'm not going to do.
For instance, I'm not gonna setup in front of guests.
I'm not going to be okay with acouple saying we only wanna
provide seating for half of our150 guests for dinner.
(23:38):
No, no, we need seating for all.
That's why we're not gonna havea half and half situation here.
There's gonna be certain thingswhere I'm gonna be like, okay,
that's gonna affect myreputation, but if it's just the
overall aesthetic, come on.
Why do we have to care so muchabout that?
Let's just give these coupleswhat they need and what they
(24:00):
want and back off a little bitand stop caring so much about
but how am I gonna get public?
So I'm not gonna be able topost anything about that.
Speaker 2 (24:09):
That's the biggest like how am I gonna put this?
This is gonna mess up myInstagram feed.
Who cares?
Speaker 1 (24:14):
You're like, if you're only in business because
of your Instagram feed, you arenot in the right business.
You're not supposed to beplanning wedding specifically
for that purpose You're supposedto be.
And I bet you, chrissy, if anywedding planner is asking
themselves, why did I get intothis industry in the first place
, why did I wanna become awedding planner?
Almost all of them will saywell, in the beginning it was
(24:37):
just because I loved love.
I wanted to help couples bringtheir wedding dreams to life.
Okay, so when did it switchthen from that?
Because everybody has their ownwedding dreams.
Right To it has to be mywedding dream for your event.
And I'm gonna be really a bigstickler on how pretty
(24:58):
everything is because I caremore about my Instagram feed.
It can't be about that.
Speaker 2 (25:04):
And I think what's happening is because of
Instagram.
We're playing the comparisongame, where we're following all
of these big publications thatare featuring nothing but these
high-end weddings and we'rethinking, well, am I wanting to?
Don't look like that, am Idoing something wrong?
And then we're giving.
Some of our planners aregetting education from educators
(25:25):
who that's all they'repreaching.
So it's blurring the lines ofwhat we should be as white
entrepreneurs and what, like yousaid, what our initial reason
was for getting in this industry.
Speaker 1 (25:38):
I really I really can appreciate that and I really
think that we need to kind of goback in time.
You know, when I first startedplanning events in the 1700s,
there was no fix, there was nosuch thing as Instagram, and I
felt like I was able toexperience a couple's event in a
(25:59):
completely different way.
It's because I wasn't motivatedby how I was going to be
perceived by others.
I got to be present.
It's kind of like now going toa concert If you go to a concert
, if you went to a concert backin the year 2000, versus going
to a concert in 2023, let metell you the main difference
(26:21):
between those two experiences.
The first experience, back in2000, you were present, you were
in the moment, you werewatching the band on stage.
If you're at a concert today,everybody has their phone out
and they are viewing the concertthrough the lens of their phone
, watching the band on stage,and they're not being present in
(26:44):
that moment.
And I feel like that's what'shappening with weddings back in
the day, for wedding plannersthat are not feeling as though
everything has to be publishedand perceived.
They're just there to give aservice that they are being paid
for and they are in the moment.
They're in the present momentwith that couple, versus the
type of wedding planner thatsees everything through the lens
(27:07):
of Instagram and publications.
I feel as though we, as anindustry of wedding planners,
need to move away from that andI think, right, yes, if you have
an amazing wedding, surepublish it, put it all over
social media, but if you have acouple that you're like, I just
loved them and maybe, maybe justpost a picture of you with the
(27:32):
couple or do a couple of sillypictures with you and the couple
just to have some fun, there'salways a different angle you can
take.
If it's not like one of theprettiest weddings you've ever
produced, and not because of thefault of the wedding planners,
just maybe the couple didn'thave a lot of money.
And I'll be honest, chrissy,I've done weddings.
Like I said, my lowest budgetwas $3,000.
(27:53):
I've done multimillion dollarcelebrity weddings.
I don't care, none of itmatters.
I cared about the people.
I cared about their experience.
I wanted to provide a luxuryexperience, no matter how much
they had to spend.
They spent the same amount ofmoney on me and that's the
difference.
(28:13):
Here they're getting paid.
Why do you need more?
So I think that it's importantthat we just stay present and
stop making it about the budget,but I think it is wise to
always educate your couples onthe budget and they might say to
you yeah, okay, so I didn'trealize that it was going to
cost us this much, so we may notbe able to get the wedding that
(28:34):
we were hoping for.
That, by the way, right, thereis an opportunity.
We can take that as anopportunity and say, oh, we can
still get you a fabulous wedding.
It's just that now you're goingto need to kind of some of my
know-how and I'm still sellingthem on me.
I you're going to need myknow-how because I have given
weddings where you wouldn'tbelieve what I've pulled out
(28:56):
before, because of myconnections, because I know some
tips and tricks.
So I think we can stillaccomplish what you're looking
for with the lower budget, butwe're going to have to make some
adjustments.
Maybe we're going to need tocut a little bit of the guest
list.
Maybe we're going to need toget incredibly creative with
this, this and this.
If you're willing to do it, Iam willing to be in this journey
with you.
(29:17):
Here are my fees, here are myservices.
Let's go through them and I canwalk you through what I can do
for you based on everything Inow know.
You should still sell yourself.
I still booked almost everysingle wedding couple that sat
in front of me because I didn'tjudge them on their budget.
I educated them and thenfigured out a way that I could
(29:40):
help them in another way.
Speaker 2 (29:42):
I think what sums this up for me is you, as a
wedding planner.
We should not let someone'sbudget impact the service that
we provide or how we treat them.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (29:52):
I think that that's good advice and I think that's
probably where we could evenleave it, because we want to
make sure that we are loving ourjob and remembering why we got
into this career path in thefirst place.
It's because we love love.
We love events, we loveproviding a once in a lifetime
experience for two people whohave fallen in love, and it's
(30:15):
the first day of their entirelife together.
That is one of the mostincredible, most amazing
experiences that we are paid tobe a part of.
Do you know what kind of crazyhonor that is?
That's insane.
It's huge.
I think what we need to do is,just as an industry, step back.
(30:36):
Let's analyze what it is thatwe're doing, what our priorities
are, and remember being awedding planner is not just for
the wealthy, it is for everybody.
Let's be more well-rounded,let's be kinder, let's help
educate our couples.
Let's educate ourselves so thatwe understand how we can show
up better at initialconsultations and be less judgy
(30:58):
of other wedding planners aswell as our couples that have a
little bit of a lower budgetthan what we've deemed is
appropriate.
Thank you all for listening tothe Wedding Planner Podcast If
you're not yet a member of theCertified Wedding Planner
Society.
We would love to welcome youinto our amazing and loving
family.
You can find more informationabout us on our website,
(31:19):
weddingplanarsystietycom.
I hope all of you have anamazing day.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Special Summer Offer: Exclusively on Apple Podcasts, try our Dateline Premium subscription completely free for one month! With Dateline Premium, you get every episode ad-free plus exclusive bonus content.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!