August 1, 2023 • 27 mins
Wedding Industry News - August 2023: Have you ever thought about how a Supreme Court ruling could rock the entire wedding industry? Our esteemed guest, Matt Mitchell, an LGBTQ+ community member and Master Certified Wedding Planner, helps us dissect a recent ruling that tilted in favor of a Colorado website designer who wanted to refuse service to LGBTQ+ couples. Join us as we delve into the ripple effects of this ruling on the LGBTQ+ community.
Further into this robust discussion, we unpack the urgent need for inclusivity in the wedding industry. With the help of Matt's expert insights, we tackle the importance of gender-neutral language and representation in marketing materials, policies, and contracts. Hear our views on the pressing need for wedding professionals to reevaluate their materials, educate their crew, and the critical role of networking within the LGBTQ+ community in fostering inclusivity. Plus, discover the unique use of the Mindfulness Card to honor the couple's roles and pronouns on their wedding day.
As we round off, we touch on old and new trends in the wedding industry, from the rise of secondhand wedding gowns to the shift in wedding party sizes. We share our thoughts on the growing consciousness among couples about their environmental footprint, and how wedding planners need to adapt to these changing dynamics. We end with a powerful reminder that the spotlight of a wedding should always remain on the couple, irrespective of the size of their wedding party. Tune in and join us in making the wedding industry more welcoming and inclusive.
The Wedding Planner Podcast brought to you by the Certified Wedding Planner Society
Host: Aisha Garnett: Certified Educator & Master CWP with the CWP Society, and owner of Sheree Amour Weddings & Event Planning.
Guests: Matt Mitchell, owner of Mitchell Event Planning; Laurie Hartwell, CEO of the CWP Society, and Krisy Thomas, VP of the CWP Society and owner of Southern Sparkle Weddings and Events
Become a VIP of The Wedding Planner Podcast: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1933700/subscribe
www.cwpsociety.com | info@cwpsociety.com | IG: @cwpsociety | FB: @cwpsociety
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to the Wedding Planner podcast brought
to you by the Certified WeddingPlanner Society.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Hello and welcome to the Wedding Industry News.
It's August 2023 and I'm yourhost, aisha Garnett, certified
Educator and Master CertifiedWedding Planner with the
Certified Wedding PlannerSociety, where each episode
covers something old, somethingnew, something borrowed and some
news.
Let's jump right into some news.
(00:42):
Just recently, the Supreme Courtruled in favor of a Colorado
website designer who refused towork with LGBTQ plus couples.
Graphic designer Lori Smithstated that she wanted to create
websites, but not for LGBTQplus couples when it comes to
marriage.
Due to her religious beliefs.
She feared that she'd be forcedto do so under Colorado's
(01:02):
current anti-discrimination law,which guarantees public access
regardless of disability, race,creed, sex, sexual orientation,
including transgender status,marital status, family status,
religion, national origin orancestry.
The court has mentioned thatfree speech is her right.
However, with this ruling, theSupreme Court limits the
(01:25):
protections of members in theLGBTQ plus community.
Here to discuss this topic withme a bit further is the
Certified Wedding PlannerSociety, certified Educator,
master Certified Wedding Plannerand owner of Mitchell Event
Planning, matt Mitchell.
Welcome to the show, matt.
As a member of the LGBTQ pluscommunity, what's your take on
the Supreme Court's ruling?
Speaker 3 (01:46):
Well, to put it bluntly, not a great ruling for
the LGBTQ plus community.
There were a couple of thingsthat you mentioned in your intro
that I'd like to point out.
The first one is that Coloradoactually has an
anti-discrimination policy fortheir citizens.
In, colorado is only one of 22states actually have that
(02:09):
protection.
The other 28 states are missingthose basic freedoms for
Americans like LGBTQ pluscitizens, and so not only did
this really kind of muddy thewaters as to what a company can
legally do or not do, but it'salso taking away the protections
that were put in place formembers of the LGBTQ plus
(02:31):
community.
So it's really dishearteningthat this was the way that the
court cited, especially givingsome of this celebration wins
that we saw through the SupremeCourt, like in 2015.
But you know, this one is in ayear where you've seen
heightened, I guess, aggressionin bills and legislation against
(02:55):
the community.
This was another blow to thecommunity.
Just to put that in perspective, in 2022, there were 149
anti-LGBTQ plus bills proposedacross the US.
Here in 2023, and us only beingseven months into the year
we're at 530 and growing.
So and you also mentioned thisin your in your intro about
(03:17):
transgender that is a lot ofwhat these bills are targeting
our gender non conforming andtransgender individuals within
the LGBTQ plus community.
So not great news for thewedding industry and for my
community specifically.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
And I know you mentioned just in June of 2015,
but that was just a few yearsago the Supreme Court ruled that
same sex marriage was protectedunder the 14th Amendment.
Now fast forward to June 2023and the Supreme Court rules in
favor of cases such as this,would you say.
This leaves room for the LGBTQplus community to feel less,
(03:55):
less hopeful.
Speaker 3 (03:56):
Yeah, right, I mean we're.
We saw, just like I justmentioned, that there's just
more and more that's alwayscoming against the community.
So us being able to celebrate awin, you know, eight years ago,
with having that right toofficially get married, was
something that was, you know,monumental.
It really reshaped what thewedding industry was all about.
(04:20):
So to see that kind of fadingaway it's it is, it's a little
disappointing.
But again, I don't like todwell on maybe the negative.
So the way that I like to lookat it is is what can we do now
that this is the way that theyruled?
How can we make this a moreinclusive environment for LGBTQ
(04:42):
plus couples that are looking toget married because, guess what
, they still have the right toget married?
And how can other professionalsmake sure that they're being
inclusive and welcoming of all?
Speaker 2 (04:51):
And I know you're hitting that that right on
target.
I know we just did a town hallwhere you shared a wealth of
information and a wealth ofknowledge from with the start of
our wedding planner society inregards to just embracing
equality and, just, you know,providing tips and resources to
the wedding pros on how we cando better, you know, and really
(05:13):
expressing that inclusivity.
So could you speak a little bitto the wedding industry and you
know how it is impacted withthe Supreme Court's ruling?
Speaker 3 (05:23):
So impact of what the Supreme Court does really
either positively effects ornegatively affects this, so
we'll kind of rehash it hereback in 2015.
It was.
It was great for the weddingindustry, right.
It allowed a new group ofindividuals to legally get
married, which opened up newopportunities for wedding
professionals to have a new setof clients that they could
(05:47):
market to in service, as well ascreating specialized services
and offerings that they neverhad before.
So there's certainly, you know,benefits to you know positive
rulings, but, on the other hand,when there's more negative
legal developments that rollback protections, like this case
, it can potentially createchallenges and discrimination
(06:07):
within the wedding industry.
It leads to legal uncertaintiesand debates about the
provisions of services to LGBTQplus couples and and impacts the
experience and options thatthey have available to them.
So again, we're in a kind of aweird situation now where people
just don't know how to moveforward and I say this on behalf
(06:32):
of couples, right, so they'rescared.
They don't know if they aregonna be accepted.
I've talked about this numeroustimes before, but a LGBTQ plus
couple has to come out so manytimes throughout the wedding
planning process, so each time Idon't know exactly.
It depends on whether it's moreof an intimate wedding or a huge
(06:56):
wedding, how many vendors youhave, but I would say it's not
uncommon to have 10 or morevendors at your wedding.
So you have to think about.
Couples have to come out 10different times or more to each
vendor when they're doing theseprocesses.
So it's a very nerve-wrackingtime, especially in the current
climate.
So you know it's sad to seekind of of where this kind of
(07:23):
leading the wedding industry.
But again, I'm hopeful thatwe'll have a group of some
fantastic wedding professionalsthat say you know what?
I don't care what the SupremeCourt says.
Here's who we do business with,here's our core values and
here's what we want to make surethat we're providing to all
couples, regardless of who theylove.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
Absolutely.
And speaking a little bit moreto the wedding professionals in
our industry, what are someother tips or any advice that
you can offer to them so thatthey are making sure that we're
expressing our you know equalityand inclusivity for our clients
and potential clients andvendor relationships?
And I know again, I mentionedour town hall and I know that
(08:07):
education is key and you knoweducating themselves on the
community and you know what theycan do what advice can you lend
to them to make sure that we'redoing that?
Speaker 3 (08:18):
Yeah, I mean there's a lot, right, we don't have all
the time in the world today, soI'll just go through a few of
them, and you mentioned this onestraight off the bat, which is
education is huge, but alsoawareness, right.
If you're not aware of what'sgoing on within a community,
then you're probably not gonnabe effective in helping the
community.
So it's super important thatpeople stay aware, and one thing
(08:42):
that I shared in the town hallis that People look to
organizations that support theLGBTQ plus community to make
sure that they are staying up todate on those, and some.
Two of the organizations that Imentioned were GLAD, glaad and
the Human Rights Campaign, whichis also known as HRC.
So those are two great nationalorganizations that really are
(09:05):
hands on within the community.
But I also would encouragepeople to look within their
local communities, because it'salso important to know what's
going and happening on happeningin your own community.
You know we talked about itColorado is one of 22 states
that has protections.
Maybe you're in a state thatdoesn't have protection.
It's important for you to knowthose things, and so you know,
(09:27):
just try to find either anonprofit or some type of
organization that's aligned withLGBTQ plus rights would be a
good way for you to figure thatinformation out.
And then again, yeah, seekingout education.
It's important.
You don't know what you don'tknow, so, so seeking out
education to learn more about aspecific community is super
(09:48):
important.
It can help you to make surethat you are meeting that that
community where they are andmaking sure that you're
providing the best servicepossible.
The next thing is is languageand communication.
In our wedding industry, we aresteeped in gender terms.
Right, it's bridal, bridal,bridal, bridal.
So just knowing that there'smore than just brides and more
(10:10):
than just brides and grooms outthere.
So leading with gender neutrallanguage is super, super
beneficial.
So, again, not looking atbridal bouquets, but looking at
floral bouquets, not looking ata bride and bridal gown, but
maybe a wedding gown or weddingattire in general, just making
those small tweaks can reallyjust do a lot when it comes to
(10:32):
making people feel like they areincluded.
With that in mind, we justtalked about speaking, but what
about in actual print?
Thinking through your marketingmaterials, thinking about your
social media presence, do youhave representation?
That's, that's huge right.
So I mentioned this in the townhall as well is a lot of times
(10:53):
we, as wedding professionals,unless you're a venue, don't
have a brick and mortar wherepeople are coming in to kind of
see what you're all about.
So your website and your socialmedia is your storefront.
It's where their windowshopping before they even reach
out to you.
So if they don't see themselvesrepresented, they're probably
not going to reach out to you orthey don't feel like it's a
safe place to reach out.
(11:15):
So it's very important, in lightof this decision, that people
are really making sure that theyare highlighting LGBTQ plus
couples and just non traditionalcouples or diverse couples in
general.
Right, making sure that there'srepresentation in their
materials and in their marketing, as well as in their policies
and in their contracts.
Last thing you want to do islook great on social media and
(11:37):
in your website and then sendthem a contract that says brides
name, grooms name Whoa, thatlooks a little weird.
So making sure that you knowyou're really going through and
doing a full audit of everythingthat you have is super, super
important, and then trainingyour staff to make sure that
they are in in unison with youwhen it comes to these policies
(12:00):
and procedures that you have,because they're a direct, direct
reflection of your company andof you.
So making sure that everyone onyour team is 100% committed to
ensuring that all couples arewelcome, celebrated and
respected is super important,and I think maybe a big one also
is our vendor partners right,if we were referring our vendor
(12:22):
partners, it is a directreflection of you, of your
business.
So if you put your couples in asituation that's less than
ideal because you didn't do yourresearch and find out whether
they were LGBTQ plus affirmingand it could put a bad
relationship for you and yourclient going forward, right,
maybe you had a greatrelationship, but now we're.
(12:44):
We have six more months to gobefore wedding date and we're in
a bad spot.
So making sure that you arereconnecting with people that
are on your preferred vendorlist and ensuring that their
business policies and yourbusiness values are aligned is
super, super important.
And then I guess the only otherthing that I would say is
making sure that you areproviding yourself with the
(13:06):
opportunity to network withinthe community.
So looking out fororganizations that provide
networking for either LGBTQ plusbusiness owned businesses or
allied business so people thatare affirming of that community
is a great way to just getconnections.
You know, maybe you don't havethat imagery that we just talked
about.
(13:26):
For representation, that'd be agreat opportunity for you to
network with potential preferredvendors, create a style shoot
that celebrates, you know, lgbtqplus couples, and then you have
that representation that youcan then put out in your social
media presence.
You have new people that you'readding to your preferred vendor
(13:46):
list and you've networkedthroughout the community.
So those are just a few optionsthrough a lot of different
options that people could taketo be more inclusive in their
own business.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
I love it and I also love how you mentioned earlier
in our interview that the LGBTQplus community they have to come
out to all of these vendors.
So just really educating yourteam and just making sure the
wedding pros that you're workingwith are aware and you know
they have inclusivity and I know.
(14:18):
Going back to our town hall,because I promise you there was
so much good information on ourtown hall the mindfulness card.
Can you speak a little bit tothat?
Speaker 3 (14:29):
That meant my mindfulness card was born right
here in the Certified WeddingPlanner Society as Lori Christy
and myself were preparing forthe four-week clinic that I do
usually each year, which is tohow to attract onboard and
retain LGBTQ plus couples.
I was sharing with them regardsthat, how much I do leading up
(14:50):
to the day.
Right it's, you have a lot ofpeople that are maybe not
full-time employees of whatevervendor team that you're working
with.
Maybe it's a bartending company, or maybe it's a staff that is
setting up within the venue, somaybe they're not aware of some
of the people that you've beenworking with throughout the
entire process about you knowwho is here getting married
(15:11):
today.
So we put our heads together andfound that this mindfulness
card was a great asset forwedding professionals,
specifically wedding planners onwedding day, and what that
mindfulness card does is providethe first name of the couple,
it provides their role in theday and it provides them with
(15:33):
the pronouns and then how theywould like to be introduced.
So this is super helpful, ofcourse, whenever you are working
with either a DJ or a live band, for you know the couple
introduction.
If that's something that theywant to do, the last thing you
want is for them to say a Mr andMrs when there's not a Mr and
Mrs.
So you know, just having thatand distributing that to the
(15:56):
people that are on site on dayand making sure that they're
aware of what's happening andwho this day is about is super
important and again it will.
It will really create a more Ijust a pleasant environment for
the couple to ensure that, youknow, we're not muddying the
waters and we're not creating asituation where we could really
(16:19):
be putting them down on one ofthe biggest days of their life.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
Absolutely, absolutely, and I love the quote
that you mentioned.
In the industry of love, thereis no room for hate.
I love that and it's so true.
This is all we do.
The wedding industry is love,it's celebrations, it's joy, the
event industry as a whole.
So there's no room for hate.
If you're human, you shouldknow how it feels if someone is
(16:46):
hating towards you ordiscriminating towards you.
You know how you feel, so justdon't exude that.
You exude love.
If you spread love, it's adomino effect, and vice versa If
you exude hate and you spreadhate, it's a domino effect.
So choose wisely is my thought.
Speaker 3 (17:08):
Yeah, it's true.
I mean, you know you really,whenever you're around someone
kind of like their mood andtheir aura kind of rub off on
you, right?
So making sure what I alwaystell, even the people that work
with me on site on the weddingday, is we don't match energy,
we bring the energy.
Think about and this hasnothing to do with LGBTQ plus
(17:31):
couples at all but here thething is, you know people are
looking to you as the weddingplanner on wedding day and if
you're showing up flustered andstressed, out everybody else is
going to get flustered andstressed out.
So, while that's typically whatI mean, it can also, you know,
translate to this conversationas well.
Don't match energy.
(17:52):
You bring the energy that youwant to exude, and and either
those around you will eitheradapt or they'll, you know, find
their way on to maybe, a groupthat they want to exude with.
Yeah, I love it.
Speaker 2 (18:06):
I always love your energy, Matt.
Do you have any final thoughtsthat you'd like to share with
our listeners today?
Speaker 3 (18:15):
Yeah, I think you know, while we are a resilient
community and again the LGBTQplus community is who I'm
referring to we still need thehelp of our allies to continue
to make progress and to stop theerasure of our protections and
people actually within ourcommunity.
So just two, two words here, ortwo to act, get informed and
(18:38):
get involved, because wecertainly need you.
So again, thank you to all ofour allies out there.
If there's any way that youknow I can be a resource for
people to become a better ally,certainly reach out.
That's what I am here for.
So, but yeah, get informed andget involved.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
I love it, matt.
Thank you so so much for yourtime today and discussing this
important topic and, you know,just for sharing your thoughts
with our listeners and justbeing a wealth of knowledge.
Back at you.
On to something Baru.
In this segment, we featureinformation from an alternate
(19:19):
source that I feel you would beinterested in.
For instance, pa media groupput out an article stating that
David Sprattle recentlyannounced that they will be
keeping the doors open to nearly195 of its retail stores after
successfully closing the sale ofall its assets to Scion
Investment Corporation.
This financial move will alsohelp preserve 7000 jobs across
(19:43):
the country.
According to penlivecom, in2018, david Sprattle filed
bankruptcy and again in April ofthis year, leading the
potential for more than 9000workers nationwide to be laid
off.
Thanks to the Scion Investmentspartnership and investing more
than 20 million into a new andimproved era for the big name
(20:03):
retailer, they will be able tocontinue serving brides and
customers.
Joining me to discuss thislatest news are Laurie Hartwell
and Chrissy Thomas, the CEO andVP of the Certified Wedding
Planner Society.
Welcome ladies.
Hello, how are you?
I'm good.
How are the two of you we?
Speaker 3 (20:22):
are.
Speaker 2 (20:23):
So let's get into it With my first question.
Do you think COVID caused a newtrend of engaged couples and
customers shopping forsecondhand wedding gowns as
opposed to ordering a brand newone with big retailers such as
Davis Brattle?
Speaker 4 (20:36):
I think what's happening now is that, with Gen
Zers, they are just a lot moreconscious of the carbon
footprint that they're leavingbehind and that includes the
excess of clothes and just beinga bit smarter when it comes to
their shopping habits, and notjust with wedding gowns, but
with their everyday wear, to thepoint where there's literally
like a trending thing on TikTokright now, where it's like
(20:59):
thrift talk, where they'reshowcasing their thrifted finds.
They're having a lot of fun withbeing able to be super
conscious about what they'reputting out into the environment
, but also, you know, with whatthey're wearing and being
conscious of that.
And I think that definitely hasto do a lot with weddings as
well.
They're just they're, you know,when you think about a wedding
dress and the cost of it, andthey're thinking, if I'm going
(21:19):
to these big retailers, I'mspending thousands of dollars
for this one dress.
I'm wearing this one day.
Why can't I just get a gownthat has been second?
You know, someone only wore itonce.
Why not buy a thrifted weddinggown for my wedding day?
I think it's becoming a bigtrend and I just think it has to
do with the couples who are nowgetting engaged and what's
important to them and having abrand new wedding gown is just
(21:42):
not something.
That's just super important tothem, that they're wanting to be
very conscious of theirdecisions they're making.
Speaker 1 (21:47):
The couples that are getting married today are
definitely opting for spendingtheir money in ways that are
more meaningful to them, andthat's, I think, really kind of
beautiful if you think about it.
So I love that.
That's kind of the trend thatis going, but I'm also seeing a
lot of online purchasing.
So, where couples would havegone into a brick and mortar
(22:09):
store before, you're seeing alot more couples today ordering
those wedding gowns online, andso you're seeing a lot of that
because they would rather puttheir money towards, like a
really great let's just say,amazing DJ or photographer,
their certified wedding planner,things of that nature.
I think that they are realizingthat they want to spend their
money a little bit different.
(22:30):
There are still tons ofbeautiful couples that are
saying no, I want the brand newdress, I want to go to the brick
and mortar store, I want tohave that experience, and so
that's what I'm finding is thedifference between couples is
the ones that want thatexperience that once in a
lifetime going into the dressshop, having like all of the
dresses to be tried on andhaving their loved ones look,
(22:52):
you know, on them and go, oh,that was so beautiful, and I
love that too, but we have a lotof couples today that are like,
no, I don't really care so muchabout that.
So thank goodness we actuallyhave alternative ways that our
couples can do that shopping.
As wedding planners, they needto make sure that we are being
as flexible with our couples aspossible and giving them these
(23:13):
alternative sites that they canbe looking at.
If they come to us and say thisjust isn't a priority of mine,
kind of like what Chrissy wassaying.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
Well, thank you both for sharing your take on this.
I appreciate you for joining metoday.
Next up is our old and newsegment.
This is where I'll bediscussing an old trend and what
is replacing it.
Today we'll be discussingconsiderations when there's a
large wedding party.
(23:40):
One of my favorite couples saidtheir I-dos with 42 members in
their wedding party.
This included the parents,grandparents, groomsmen,
bridesmaids, ring bearers,flower girls and the couple.
42 members that I prepared tocoordinate during the wedding
rehearsal.
42 members that I included onmy ceremony diagram to ensure
(24:01):
that they all knew where to sit,where to stand and in what
order to walk down the aisle onthe day of the wedding.
42 members that my coupledecided to include in their
special day beyond the scope ofjust being their wedding guests.
I get it.
Saying I do is by far one ofthe biggest moments in a
couple's life.
They are standing beforefriends and family saying their
(24:23):
vows and commitment to eachother, and what better way to do
so than to have some of theirclosest friends and family
members stand beside themserving as their wedding party?
This trusted and close group ofindividuals also helped me
understand that some of thosepre-wedding festivities, such as
wedding showers or bachelor andbachelorette parties.
They are meant to be there tohelp and provide assistance to
(24:45):
the couple, making sure theprocess is as stress-free as
possible.
However, I'm seeing more andmore couples either opt out of
having those huge weddingparties and they are keeping it
down to a minimum of maybe twoto three individuals on each
side, or they are nixing theentire wedding party altogether.
So for wedding planners outthere who are asked about how
(25:07):
large of a party is too large,here's some advice you can give
them.
Opting to nix the wedding partyis opting to nix the worry that
may come with having so manypersonalities to keep up with,
all while trying to complete themany tasks and requests from us
, their certified weddingplanner.
Opting to have a more peacefuland relaxed journey as they plan
(25:28):
their big day without having topair couples to walk down the
aisle, gather multiple peoplefor a limited rehearsal time who
may not be available to attend,only to have us, the wedding
planner, bring them up to speedthe day of the wedding.
Something else to think aboutis space.
If our ceremony location issmall, our couple may have to
(25:49):
have them sit through theceremony and that means they are
going to take up the entirefront row, maybe two rows.
So why have a wedding party Ifour couples have to worry about
the stress of who took the timeto order their dresses and tuxes
, not to mention getting fitted?
Why have a wedding party?
If our couples have to worryabout the wedding party's drama
(26:10):
during the most important day intheir journey to marriage, why
worry with the wedding party?
Our couples may not realizethat their floral budget is also
going to be drasticallyimpacted because of how many
bouquets and boutonniers andcorsages that are needed, not to
mention the time it will taketo do hair and makeup on the
(26:30):
wedding day.
There are many reasons whycouples today are opting to have
a more intimate wedding party.
The focus of our couple'swedding day should start and end
with the couple.
Guests show up to see the unionof the couple.
They show up to celebrate withthe couple.
When they look back at thewedding party members that they
selected to be a part of theirbig day, sure, it's a great
(26:52):
feeling to know that they arestanding directly behind them in
support, but if they decide todo away with having a wedding
party and it's just the two ofthem standing at the altar, that
is okay.
Remind them that they have asea of guests, including those
42 people that were consideringto be in their wedding party,
(27:13):
sitting behind cheering them on.
The one true fact remains thesame with 42 members, or just
the two of them, standing at thealtar, their union is between
them.
They become the wedding party,they are the focus, and their
day will be just as special.
That wraps up our August 2023wedding industry news.
Thank you for listening.
(27:33):
We look forward to having youjoin us here next month on the
Wedding Planner podcast.
Welcome to the Wedding Planner podcast brought
to you by the Certified WeddingPlanner Society.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Hello and welcome to the Wedding Industry News.
It's August 2023 and I'm yourhost, aisha Garnett, certified
Educator and Master CertifiedWedding Planner with the
Certified Wedding PlannerSociety, where each episode
covers something old, somethingnew, something borrowed and some
news.
Let's jump right into some news.
(00:42):
Just recently, the Supreme Courtruled in favor of a Colorado
website designer who refused towork with LGBTQ plus couples.
Graphic designer Lori Smithstated that she wanted to create
websites, but not for LGBTQplus couples when it comes to
marriage.
Due to her religious beliefs.
She feared that she'd be forcedto do so under Colorado's
(01:02):
current anti-discrimination law,which guarantees public access
regardless of disability, race,creed, sex, sexual orientation,
including transgender status,marital status, family status,
religion, national origin orancestry.
The court has mentioned thatfree speech is her right.
However, with this ruling, theSupreme Court limits the
(01:25):
protections of members in theLGBTQ plus community.
Here to discuss this topic withme a bit further is the
Certified Wedding PlannerSociety, certified Educator,
master Certified Wedding Plannerand owner of Mitchell Event
Planning, matt Mitchell.
Welcome to the show, matt.
As a member of the LGBTQ pluscommunity, what's your take on
the Supreme Court's ruling?
Speaker 3 (01:46):
Well, to put it bluntly, not a great ruling for
the LGBTQ plus community.
There were a couple of thingsthat you mentioned in your intro
that I'd like to point out.
The first one is that Coloradoactually has an
anti-discrimination policy fortheir citizens.
In, colorado is only one of 22states actually have that
(02:09):
protection.
The other 28 states are missingthose basic freedoms for
Americans like LGBTQ pluscitizens, and so not only did
this really kind of muddy thewaters as to what a company can
legally do or not do, but it'salso taking away the protections
that were put in place formembers of the LGBTQ plus
(02:31):
community.
So it's really dishearteningthat this was the way that the
court cited, especially givingsome of this celebration wins
that we saw through the SupremeCourt, like in 2015.
But you know, this one is in ayear where you've seen
heightened, I guess, aggressionin bills and legislation against
(02:55):
the community.
This was another blow to thecommunity.
Just to put that in perspective, in 2022, there were 149
anti-LGBTQ plus bills proposedacross the US.
Here in 2023, and us only beingseven months into the year
we're at 530 and growing.
So and you also mentioned thisin your in your intro about
(03:17):
transgender that is a lot ofwhat these bills are targeting
our gender non conforming andtransgender individuals within
the LGBTQ plus community.
So not great news for thewedding industry and for my
community specifically.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
And I know you mentioned just in June of 2015,
but that was just a few yearsago the Supreme Court ruled that
same sex marriage was protectedunder the 14th Amendment.
Now fast forward to June 2023and the Supreme Court rules in
favor of cases such as this,would you say.
This leaves room for the LGBTQplus community to feel less,
(03:55):
less hopeful.
Speaker 3 (03:56):
Yeah, right, I mean we're.
We saw, just like I justmentioned, that there's just
more and more that's alwayscoming against the community.
So us being able to celebrate awin, you know, eight years ago,
with having that right toofficially get married, was
something that was, you know,monumental.
It really reshaped what thewedding industry was all about.
(04:20):
So to see that kind of fadingaway it's it is, it's a little
disappointing.
But again, I don't like todwell on maybe the negative.
So the way that I like to lookat it is is what can we do now
that this is the way that theyruled?
How can we make this a moreinclusive environment for LGBTQ
(04:42):
plus couples that are looking toget married because, guess what
, they still have the right toget married?
And how can other professionalsmake sure that they're being
inclusive and welcoming of all?
Speaker 2 (04:51):
And I know you're hitting that that right on
target.
I know we just did a town hallwhere you shared a wealth of
information and a wealth ofknowledge from with the start of
our wedding planner society inregards to just embracing
equality and, just, you know,providing tips and resources to
the wedding pros on how we cando better, you know, and really
(05:13):
expressing that inclusivity.
So could you speak a little bitto the wedding industry and you
know how it is impacted withthe Supreme Court's ruling?
Speaker 3 (05:23):
So impact of what the Supreme Court does really
either positively effects ornegatively affects this, so
we'll kind of rehash it hereback in 2015.
It was.
It was great for the weddingindustry, right.
It allowed a new group ofindividuals to legally get
married, which opened up newopportunities for wedding
professionals to have a new setof clients that they could
(05:47):
market to in service, as well ascreating specialized services
and offerings that they neverhad before.
So there's certainly, you know,benefits to you know positive
rulings, but, on the other hand,when there's more negative
legal developments that rollback protections, like this case
, it can potentially createchallenges and discrimination
(06:07):
within the wedding industry.
It leads to legal uncertaintiesand debates about the
provisions of services to LGBTQplus couples and and impacts the
experience and options thatthey have available to them.
So again, we're in a kind of aweird situation now where people
just don't know how to moveforward and I say this on behalf
(06:32):
of couples, right, so they'rescared.
They don't know if they aregonna be accepted.
I've talked about this numeroustimes before, but a LGBTQ plus
couple has to come out so manytimes throughout the wedding
planning process, so each time Idon't know exactly.
It depends on whether it's moreof an intimate wedding or a huge
(06:56):
wedding, how many vendors youhave, but I would say it's not
uncommon to have 10 or morevendors at your wedding.
So you have to think about.
Couples have to come out 10different times or more to each
vendor when they're doing theseprocesses.
So it's a very nerve-wrackingtime, especially in the current
climate.
So you know it's sad to seekind of of where this kind of
(07:23):
leading the wedding industry.
But again, I'm hopeful thatwe'll have a group of some
fantastic wedding professionalsthat say you know what?
I don't care what the SupremeCourt says.
Here's who we do business with,here's our core values and
here's what we want to make surethat we're providing to all
couples, regardless of who theylove.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
Absolutely.
And speaking a little bit moreto the wedding professionals in
our industry, what are someother tips or any advice that
you can offer to them so thatthey are making sure that we're
expressing our you know equalityand inclusivity for our clients
and potential clients andvendor relationships?
And I know again, I mentionedour town hall and I know that
(08:07):
education is key and you knoweducating themselves on the
community and you know what theycan do what advice can you lend
to them to make sure that we'redoing that?
Speaker 3 (08:18):
Yeah, I mean there's a lot, right, we don't have all
the time in the world today, soI'll just go through a few of
them, and you mentioned this onestraight off the bat, which is
education is huge, but alsoawareness, right.
If you're not aware of what'sgoing on within a community,
then you're probably not gonnabe effective in helping the
community.
So it's super important thatpeople stay aware, and one thing
(08:42):
that I shared in the town hallis that People look to
organizations that support theLGBTQ plus community to make
sure that they are staying up todate on those, and some.
Two of the organizations that Imentioned were GLAD, glaad and
the Human Rights Campaign, whichis also known as HRC.
So those are two great nationalorganizations that really are
(09:05):
hands on within the community.
But I also would encouragepeople to look within their
local communities, because it'salso important to know what's
going and happening on happeningin your own community.
You know we talked about itColorado is one of 22 states
that has protections.
Maybe you're in a state thatdoesn't have protection.
It's important for you to knowthose things, and so you know,
(09:27):
just try to find either anonprofit or some type of
organization that's aligned withLGBTQ plus rights would be a
good way for you to figure thatinformation out.
And then again, yeah, seekingout education.
It's important.
You don't know what you don'tknow, so, so seeking out
education to learn more about aspecific community is super
(09:48):
important.
It can help you to make surethat you are meeting that that
community where they are andmaking sure that you're
providing the best servicepossible.
The next thing is is languageand communication.
In our wedding industry, we aresteeped in gender terms.
Right, it's bridal, bridal,bridal, bridal.
So just knowing that there'smore than just brides and more
(10:10):
than just brides and grooms outthere.
So leading with gender neutrallanguage is super, super
beneficial.
So, again, not looking atbridal bouquets, but looking at
floral bouquets, not looking ata bride and bridal gown, but
maybe a wedding gown or weddingattire in general, just making
those small tweaks can reallyjust do a lot when it comes to
(10:32):
making people feel like they areincluded.
With that in mind, we justtalked about speaking, but what
about in actual print?
Thinking through your marketingmaterials, thinking about your
social media presence, do youhave representation?
That's, that's huge right.
So I mentioned this in the townhall as well is a lot of times
(10:53):
we, as wedding professionals,unless you're a venue, don't
have a brick and mortar wherepeople are coming in to kind of
see what you're all about.
So your website and your socialmedia is your storefront.
It's where their windowshopping before they even reach
out to you.
So if they don't see themselvesrepresented, they're probably
not going to reach out to you orthey don't feel like it's a
safe place to reach out.
(11:15):
So it's very important, in lightof this decision, that people
are really making sure that theyare highlighting LGBTQ plus
couples and just non traditionalcouples or diverse couples in
general.
Right, making sure that there'srepresentation in their
materials and in their marketing, as well as in their policies
and in their contracts.
Last thing you want to do islook great on social media and
(11:37):
in your website and then sendthem a contract that says brides
name, grooms name Whoa, thatlooks a little weird.
So making sure that you knowyou're really going through and
doing a full audit of everythingthat you have is super, super
important, and then trainingyour staff to make sure that
they are in in unison with youwhen it comes to these policies
(12:00):
and procedures that you have,because they're a direct, direct
reflection of your company andof you.
So making sure that everyone onyour team is 100% committed to
ensuring that all couples arewelcome, celebrated and
respected is super important,and I think maybe a big one also
is our vendor partners right,if we were referring our vendor
(12:22):
partners, it is a directreflection of you, of your
business.
So if you put your couples in asituation that's less than
ideal because you didn't do yourresearch and find out whether
they were LGBTQ plus affirmingand it could put a bad
relationship for you and yourclient going forward, right,
maybe you had a greatrelationship, but now we're.
(12:44):
We have six more months to gobefore wedding date and we're in
a bad spot.
So making sure that you arereconnecting with people that
are on your preferred vendorlist and ensuring that their
business policies and yourbusiness values are aligned is
super, super important.
And then I guess the only otherthing that I would say is
making sure that you areproviding yourself with the
(13:06):
opportunity to network withinthe community.
So looking out fororganizations that provide
networking for either LGBTQ plusbusiness owned businesses or
allied business so people thatare affirming of that community
is a great way to just getconnections.
You know, maybe you don't havethat imagery that we just talked
about.
(13:26):
For representation, that'd be agreat opportunity for you to
network with potential preferredvendors, create a style shoot
that celebrates, you know, lgbtqplus couples, and then you have
that representation that youcan then put out in your social
media presence.
You have new people that you'readding to your preferred vendor
(13:46):
list and you've networkedthroughout the community.
So those are just a few optionsthrough a lot of different
options that people could taketo be more inclusive in their
own business.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
I love it and I also love how you mentioned earlier
in our interview that the LGBTQplus community they have to come
out to all of these vendors.
So just really educating yourteam and just making sure the
wedding pros that you're workingwith are aware and you know
they have inclusivity and I know.
(14:18):
Going back to our town hall,because I promise you there was
so much good information on ourtown hall the mindfulness card.
Can you speak a little bit tothat?
Speaker 3 (14:29):
That meant my mindfulness card was born right
here in the Certified WeddingPlanner Society as Lori Christy
and myself were preparing forthe four-week clinic that I do
usually each year, which is tohow to attract onboard and
retain LGBTQ plus couples.
I was sharing with them regardsthat, how much I do leading up
(14:50):
to the day.
Right it's, you have a lot ofpeople that are maybe not
full-time employees of whatevervendor team that you're working
with.
Maybe it's a bartending company, or maybe it's a staff that is
setting up within the venue, somaybe they're not aware of some
of the people that you've beenworking with throughout the
entire process about you knowwho is here getting married
(15:11):
today.
So we put our heads together andfound that this mindfulness
card was a great asset forwedding professionals,
specifically wedding planners onwedding day, and what that
mindfulness card does is providethe first name of the couple,
it provides their role in theday and it provides them with
(15:33):
the pronouns and then how theywould like to be introduced.
So this is super helpful, ofcourse, whenever you are working
with either a DJ or a live band, for you know the couple
introduction.
If that's something that theywant to do, the last thing you
want is for them to say a Mr andMrs when there's not a Mr and
Mrs.
So you know, just having thatand distributing that to the
(15:56):
people that are on site on dayand making sure that they're
aware of what's happening andwho this day is about is super
important and again it will.
It will really create a more Ijust a pleasant environment for
the couple to ensure that, youknow, we're not muddying the
waters and we're not creating asituation where we could really
(16:19):
be putting them down on one ofthe biggest days of their life.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
Absolutely, absolutely, and I love the quote
that you mentioned.
In the industry of love, thereis no room for hate.
I love that and it's so true.
This is all we do.
The wedding industry is love,it's celebrations, it's joy, the
event industry as a whole.
So there's no room for hate.
If you're human, you shouldknow how it feels if someone is
(16:46):
hating towards you ordiscriminating towards you.
You know how you feel, so justdon't exude that.
You exude love.
If you spread love, it's adomino effect, and vice versa If
you exude hate and you spreadhate, it's a domino effect.
So choose wisely is my thought.
Speaker 3 (17:08):
Yeah, it's true.
I mean, you know you really,whenever you're around someone
kind of like their mood andtheir aura kind of rub off on
you, right?
So making sure what I alwaystell, even the people that work
with me on site on the weddingday, is we don't match energy,
we bring the energy.
Think about and this hasnothing to do with LGBTQ plus
(17:31):
couples at all but here thething is, you know people are
looking to you as the weddingplanner on wedding day and if
you're showing up flustered andstressed, out everybody else is
going to get flustered andstressed out.
So, while that's typically whatI mean, it can also, you know,
translate to this conversationas well.
Don't match energy.
(17:52):
You bring the energy that youwant to exude, and and either
those around you will eitheradapt or they'll, you know, find
their way on to maybe, a groupthat they want to exude with.
Yeah, I love it.
Speaker 2 (18:06):
I always love your energy, Matt.
Do you have any final thoughtsthat you'd like to share with
our listeners today?
Speaker 3 (18:15):
Yeah, I think you know, while we are a resilient
community and again the LGBTQplus community is who I'm
referring to we still need thehelp of our allies to continue
to make progress and to stop theerasure of our protections and
people actually within ourcommunity.
So just two, two words here, ortwo to act, get informed and
(18:38):
get involved, because wecertainly need you.
So again, thank you to all ofour allies out there.
If there's any way that youknow I can be a resource for
people to become a better ally,certainly reach out.
That's what I am here for.
So, but yeah, get informed andget involved.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
I love it, matt.
Thank you so so much for yourtime today and discussing this
important topic and, you know,just for sharing your thoughts
with our listeners and justbeing a wealth of knowledge.
Back at you.
On to something Baru.
In this segment, we featureinformation from an alternate
(19:19):
source that I feel you would beinterested in.
For instance, pa media groupput out an article stating that
David Sprattle recentlyannounced that they will be
keeping the doors open to nearly195 of its retail stores after
successfully closing the sale ofall its assets to Scion
Investment Corporation.
This financial move will alsohelp preserve 7000 jobs across
(19:43):
the country.
According to penlivecom, in2018, david Sprattle filed
bankruptcy and again in April ofthis year, leading the
potential for more than 9000workers nationwide to be laid
off.
Thanks to the Scion Investmentspartnership and investing more
than 20 million into a new andimproved era for the big name
(20:03):
retailer, they will be able tocontinue serving brides and
customers.
Joining me to discuss thislatest news are Laurie Hartwell
and Chrissy Thomas, the CEO andVP of the Certified Wedding
Planner Society.
Welcome ladies.
Hello, how are you?
I'm good.
How are the two of you we?
Speaker 3 (20:22):
are.
Speaker 2 (20:23):
So let's get into it With my first question.
Do you think COVID caused a newtrend of engaged couples and
customers shopping forsecondhand wedding gowns as
opposed to ordering a brand newone with big retailers such as
Davis Brattle?
Speaker 4 (20:36):
I think what's happening now is that, with Gen
Zers, they are just a lot moreconscious of the carbon
footprint that they're leavingbehind and that includes the
excess of clothes and just beinga bit smarter when it comes to
their shopping habits, and notjust with wedding gowns, but
with their everyday wear, to thepoint where there's literally
like a trending thing on TikTokright now, where it's like
(20:59):
thrift talk, where they'reshowcasing their thrifted finds.
They're having a lot of fun withbeing able to be super
conscious about what they'reputting out into the environment
, but also, you know, with whatthey're wearing and being
conscious of that.
And I think that definitely hasto do a lot with weddings as
well.
They're just they're, you know,when you think about a wedding
dress and the cost of it, andthey're thinking, if I'm going
(21:19):
to these big retailers, I'mspending thousands of dollars
for this one dress.
I'm wearing this one day.
Why can't I just get a gownthat has been second?
You know, someone only wore itonce.
Why not buy a thrifted weddinggown for my wedding day?
I think it's becoming a bigtrend and I just think it has to
do with the couples who are nowgetting engaged and what's
important to them and having abrand new wedding gown is just
(21:42):
not something.
That's just super important tothem, that they're wanting to be
very conscious of theirdecisions they're making.
Speaker 1 (21:47):
The couples that are getting married today are
definitely opting for spendingtheir money in ways that are
more meaningful to them, andthat's, I think, really kind of
beautiful if you think about it.
So I love that.
That's kind of the trend thatis going, but I'm also seeing a
lot of online purchasing.
So, where couples would havegone into a brick and mortar
(22:09):
store before, you're seeing alot more couples today ordering
those wedding gowns online, andso you're seeing a lot of that
because they would rather puttheir money towards, like a
really great let's just say,amazing DJ or photographer,
their certified wedding planner,things of that nature.
I think that they are realizingthat they want to spend their
money a little bit different.
(22:30):
There are still tons ofbeautiful couples that are
saying no, I want the brand newdress, I want to go to the brick
and mortar store, I want tohave that experience, and so
that's what I'm finding is thedifference between couples is
the ones that want thatexperience that once in a
lifetime going into the dressshop, having like all of the
dresses to be tried on andhaving their loved ones look,
(22:52):
you know, on them and go, oh,that was so beautiful, and I
love that too, but we have a lotof couples today that are like,
no, I don't really care so muchabout that.
So thank goodness we actuallyhave alternative ways that our
couples can do that shopping.
As wedding planners, they needto make sure that we are being
as flexible with our couples aspossible and giving them these
(23:13):
alternative sites that they canbe looking at.
If they come to us and say thisjust isn't a priority of mine,
kind of like what Chrissy wassaying.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
Well, thank you both for sharing your take on this.
I appreciate you for joining metoday.
Next up is our old and newsegment.
This is where I'll bediscussing an old trend and what
is replacing it.
Today we'll be discussingconsiderations when there's a
large wedding party.
(23:40):
One of my favorite couples saidtheir I-dos with 42 members in
their wedding party.
This included the parents,grandparents, groomsmen,
bridesmaids, ring bearers,flower girls and the couple.
42 members that I prepared tocoordinate during the wedding
rehearsal.
42 members that I included onmy ceremony diagram to ensure
(24:01):
that they all knew where to sit,where to stand and in what
order to walk down the aisle onthe day of the wedding.
42 members that my coupledecided to include in their
special day beyond the scope ofjust being their wedding guests.
I get it.
Saying I do is by far one ofthe biggest moments in a
couple's life.
They are standing beforefriends and family saying their
(24:23):
vows and commitment to eachother, and what better way to do
so than to have some of theirclosest friends and family
members stand beside themserving as their wedding party?
This trusted and close group ofindividuals also helped me
understand that some of thosepre-wedding festivities, such as
wedding showers or bachelor andbachelorette parties.
They are meant to be there tohelp and provide assistance to
(24:45):
the couple, making sure theprocess is as stress-free as
possible.
However, I'm seeing more andmore couples either opt out of
having those huge weddingparties and they are keeping it
down to a minimum of maybe twoto three individuals on each
side, or they are nixing theentire wedding party altogether.
So for wedding planners outthere who are asked about how
(25:07):
large of a party is too large,here's some advice you can give
them.
Opting to nix the wedding partyis opting to nix the worry that
may come with having so manypersonalities to keep up with,
all while trying to complete themany tasks and requests from us
, their certified weddingplanner.
Opting to have a more peacefuland relaxed journey as they plan
(25:28):
their big day without having topair couples to walk down the
aisle, gather multiple peoplefor a limited rehearsal time who
may not be available to attend,only to have us, the wedding
planner, bring them up to speedthe day of the wedding.
Something else to think aboutis space.
If our ceremony location issmall, our couple may have to
(25:49):
have them sit through theceremony and that means they are
going to take up the entirefront row, maybe two rows.
So why have a wedding party Ifour couples have to worry about
the stress of who took the timeto order their dresses and tuxes
, not to mention getting fitted?
Why have a wedding party?
If our couples have to worryabout the wedding party's drama
(26:10):
during the most important day intheir journey to marriage, why
worry with the wedding party?
Our couples may not realizethat their floral budget is also
going to be drasticallyimpacted because of how many
bouquets and boutonniers andcorsages that are needed, not to
mention the time it will taketo do hair and makeup on the
(26:30):
wedding day.
There are many reasons whycouples today are opting to have
a more intimate wedding party.
The focus of our couple'swedding day should start and end
with the couple.
Guests show up to see the unionof the couple.
They show up to celebrate withthe couple.
When they look back at thewedding party members that they
selected to be a part of theirbig day, sure, it's a great
(26:52):
feeling to know that they arestanding directly behind them in
support, but if they decide todo away with having a wedding
party and it's just the two ofthem standing at the altar, that
is okay.
Remind them that they have asea of guests, including those
42 people that were consideringto be in their wedding party,
(27:13):
sitting behind cheering them on.
The one true fact remains thesame with 42 members, or just
the two of them, standing at thealtar, their union is between
them.
They become the wedding party,they are the focus, and their
day will be just as special.
That wraps up our August 2023wedding industry news.
Thank you for listening.
(27:33):
We look forward to having youjoin us here next month on the
Wedding Planner podcast.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Special Summer Offer: Exclusively on Apple Podcasts, try our Dateline Premium subscription completely free for one month! With Dateline Premium, you get every episode ad-free plus exclusive bonus content.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!