Picture this: you're scrolling through your social media, and you stumble upon a stunning wedding cake made by the bride herself. This is what happened to Lily Mendoza, who skyrocketed to viral fame, navigating a deluge of both cheers and jeers from netizens worldwide. Caught in the crosshairs of 'wedding shaming', she turned this into an opportunity to showcase her passion and talent, proving that every cloud indeed has a silver lining. Join us as we delve into Lily's inspiring story and discuss the darker side of the wedding industry.
But it's not all doom and gloom! We pivot to the importance of vendor relationships in ensuring a successful wedding and offering invaluable insights into the significance of these relationships, alongside the detrimental effects of 'ghosting' within the industry. The discussion further extends to the growing trend of wedding content creators and their revolutionary influence on this age-old industry. So, buckle up, grab a cup of coffee, and prepare for a fascinating exploration of the wedding industry's multifaceted world. You might just learn something that'll help you plan your own big day or navigate your career in this ever-evolving industry.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to the Wedding Planner podcast brought
to you by the Certified WeddingPlanner Society.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Welcome to the Wedding Industry News.
It's October 2023 and I'm yourhost, aisha Garnett, certified
Educator and Master CertifiedWedding Planner with the
Certified Wedding PlannerSociety, where each episode
covers something old, somethingnew, something borrowed and some
news.
According to KTVB, channel 7News, in Boise, idaho, many
(00:37):
Treasure Valley couples are leftwith the worries of how their
big day will come together whenit comes to their wedding
decorations, after one of theirlocal wedding vendors stopped
communicating with them justdays after they paid their final
payment.
In today's world, the term forthis is also known as ghosting.
One bride says she booked thevendor in the spring of this
(01:00):
year and noticed a few red flagswhen the communication
afterwards wasn't the best, butshe didn't expect for the vendor
to completely stop respondingto all forms of communication
just a few days prior to herwedding day.
Nearly a dozen brides haveexperienced the same setback
from the same vendor, with someof their wedding dates fast
(01:21):
approaching.
The wedding vendor posted onsocial media stating that
they've been experiencing somemental health issues and they
starting that over.
The wedding vendor posted onsocial media stating oh, my
goodness, starting over.
(01:41):
The wedding vendor posted onsocial media stating that
they've been experiencing.
Why can't I say this.
How do you even know such anice thing about me?
Sorry, lori.
Starting over, the weddingvendor posted on social media
(02:09):
stating that they've experiencedsome mental health issues and
that they reach out to clientssoon.
Speaking specifically to thewedding industry, unfortunately
ghosting doesn't just happenbetween wedding pros and their
clients.
It also happens between vendors, heavily impacting vendor
relationships.
Vendor to vendor relationshipsimpact client to vendor
(02:32):
relationships as well.
If you are a weddingprofessional and I'll use the
term professional lightly inthis case but if you are a
wedding pro who is ghostingother wedding pros, it wouldn't
seem out of the ordinary toghost your clients.
In either case, it's a poor wayof doing business.
Joining me to weigh in on thistopic is Chrissy Thomas, vice
(02:54):
President of the CertifiedWedding Planner Society.
Thank you so much for joiningme, chrissy.
Speaker 3 (03:00):
I'm excited, thank you for having me, and this is a
topic that I'm really excitedfor us to dive deep into, so
bring it on.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
All right, let's jump right into it.
As a certified wedding planner,we are typically the first to
reach out to other weddingprofessionals on behalf of our
clients, whether it's by phone,email or maybe even in person.
We are there to help ourclients ask those important
questions, and we do our duediligence in making sure we are
choosing the right vendors toeven work with our clients.
(03:29):
So how important, would you say, vendor to vendor relationships
are in the wedding industry?
Speaker 3 (03:35):
Oh gosh, these are such important relationships.
To me, these relationships areessentially the backbone of the
wedding day being a success.
You know, teamwork is needed tocreate that amazing experience
for our clients and their guests.
So without it, a wedding daycannot happen seamlessly.
You know, on average, a weddingcan have between 15 to 24
(03:59):
wedding professionals.
That's not including the numberof assistants, the catering
team, the delivery team and soon.
That's a large amount of peoplewho are relying on each other
to be able to do their jobs.
So you know, think of it thisway your florist cannot set up
their gorgeous inner pieceswithout having tables, which may
(04:20):
come from your venue or yourrental company.
Your venue or your rentalcompany can't set up these
tables without a floor plan, andthis may come from your wedding
planner.
Your wedding planner can'tcreate the floor plan without
working with the venue andknowing what works within the
space, and so on and so on.
So, as wedding professionals,we cannot do our job unless we
(04:42):
work with each other and havesome sort of positive working
relationship.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
I completely agree with you, Kristy, 100%.
What are some tips you canprovide to wedding professionals
or clients when it comes tovetting the wedding
professionals they eventuallywant to work with?
Speaker 3 (04:59):
Voting wedding professionals is something that
we are so passionate here about.
I'm going to start that over.
Starting over Voting weddingprofessionals is something that
we are so passionate about hereat the CWP society, so much so
we have two podcasts dedicatedto vetting.
So we have a vetting weddingvendor podcast.
(05:20):
We'll start that entiresentence over.
Voting wedding professionals issomething that we are so
passionate about here at the CWPSociety.
We have an entire podcastdedicated all about vetting
wedding professionals, and notonly wedding professionals.
We even have a podcast aboutvetting your clients, and this
(05:43):
is all about the heavyimportance of doing your due
diligence.
Jesus Christ, I was doing sogood.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
I think I might start the whole sentence over.
Speaker 3 (05:54):
Okay, starting over, voting wedding professionals is
something that we are sopassionate about here at the CWP
Society, so much so that wehave two podcasts dedicated, all
about vetting people, whetherthat's vetting wedding
professionals and vetting yourclients, and this is all about
the heavy importance of doingyour due diligence in the people
(06:15):
that you recommend and thepeople that you hire.
These were recorded in May andJune of 2022, so make sure to
get those a listen.
But, to answer your questions,vetting your wedding
professionals is vital and it'sso important.
Wedding professionals need tohave a network of certified
wedding planners they recommendto their clients, so not just
(06:36):
your wedding planners having avendor list.
I don't like the way this isgoing.
Let me see.
I'm just going to start overwith that sentence.
Starting over To answer yourquestion, aisha.
I used to.
Okay, we're going to get thistogether at some point.
(06:58):
All right, starting over Toanswer your question, aisha,
wedding professionals need tohave a network of certified
wedding planners that theyrecommend to their clients.
As certified wedding planners,we are constantly recommending
wedding professionals to ourclients.
It's a huge part of our job.
Each of us have an approvenderlist and we are the repeat
(07:21):
clients for these weddingprofessionals, but are they
recommending us to their clients?
So how does recommendingwedding planners help engage
couples in the vetting process?
We see wedding professionals inall aspects of wedding planning,
not just the highlights oftheir career they post on social
media.
We see how well theycommunicate or if there's no
(07:43):
communication at all.
We see what their behavior islike at networking events if
they're professional or possiblyeven embarrassing themselves at
these events.
We see how they handle thepressure or those stresses of
the wedding day.
We know all about those redflags prior to them even
beginning to wave.
So it's important that weddingprofessionals have a team of
(08:04):
certified wedding planners theyrecommend, because we see
everything.
We see essentially outside theglorified beauty in this, on
Instagram and their website.
We see a professional for whothey truly are and that's going
to allow you to recommend.
Where am I going with this?
I'm going to start over.
Where do I want to start over?
(08:26):
I'm going to start over withthe B.
We see how well theycommunicate or if there's no
communication at all.
We see what their behavior islike at networking events, if
they're professional or possiblyeven embarrassing themselves.
We see how they handle thepressures or stresses of the
wedding day.
We know all about those redflags prior to those red flags
(08:48):
even beginning to wave.
So by having a network ofcertified wedding planners, as a
wedding professional you areable to make sure that your
clients are being taken care of,because we create and curate
and do our due diligence whenwe're creating our approved
vendor list.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
Thank you, Now, just like any other industry, the
wedding and event industry washeavily impacted due to the
pandemic.
However, it is slowly butsurely making its way back.
Do you think the pandemiccreated an epidemic of wedding
vendors not responding to theirclients and or other wedding
professionals?
Speaker 3 (09:23):
Yes, I 100% think it did, because what happened is we
were kind of flailing.
We were having to eitherpostpone or reschedule these
weddings and what was happeningis our calendars were getting so
booked and so filled that wewere overworking ourselves and
we were trying to communicatewith all of these clients and
(09:45):
these wedding professionals andwe were essentially drowning.
I think we gave each other graceduring that time period because
we knew that we were allexperiencing the same thing.
But now that things are gettingback to normal, now that we're
getting back to your normal setof events that you booked and
you're not overly booked, yourcommunication needs to go back
to what it was prior to thepandemic.
(10:05):
We need to be responding backto emails in a timely manner.
We need to be responding backto these couples.
This is our job, and what Ifound with couples is, when
their vendors aren'tcommunicating with them, that
creates a sense of panic inthese engaged couples, and that
is the last thing that we wantto do is add even more stress to
our clients because we, aswedding professionals, are not
doing our job by simplyresponding back to them.
(10:28):
That's crucial and we have toget back to the way that things
were.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
I completely agree with you, chrissy.
It's not a great feeling to beghosted.
When you reach out to someone,you expect a response, and we
were just talking about that.
You and I both know theimportance of keeping the lines
of communication open.
If there's no communication,there's no relationship.
What can wedding professionalsdo to keep those lines of
communication open with otherwedding pros, current clients
(10:55):
and even potential clients?
Speaker 3 (10:57):
I think this goes to how they run their business.
Sometimes I feel like, aswedding pros, we, and
entrepreneurs in general we mayforget that we are running a
business.
So you have to have steps andprocedures in place to make sure
that you are able to do yourjob and do your job well.
One thing that Lori actuallytaught me to help me post
pandemic was time blocking andcreating my days to where I knew
(11:22):
what I was doing.
From this block period to thisblock period.
Having a dedicated time in yourday where that is all you're
focused on is responding back toemails and messages from your
wedding pros and from yourclients.
That's going to be crucial inmaking sure that you're actually
able to run your business andrun your business well, I think.
Another thing that I'm seeing Ifeel like this is its own little
(11:44):
epidemic is the automaticreplies back to every single
email.
That's creating that disconnectof to me when I get an
automatic reply back that sayshi, welcome, thank you for
reaching out to 7Sparkle Weddingand Event Planning.
I will get back to you within24 to 72 business hours.
(12:05):
I'm getting this over and overand over and over again.
It is leaving a bad taste in mymouth.
As a wedding professional, younaturally should be responding
back to me within 24 businesshours.
That just should be a commonthing that you do as a
professional, because what'shappening with the engaged
couples when they get thismessage is they are feeling that
(12:26):
sense of oh, this person is toobusy for me.
If this is a potential clientreaching out to you and they're
getting back this reply, that'swhat I'm going to think as an
engaged couple.
I'm going to think, oh gosh,they can't be my wedding planner
.
They're clearly too busy rightnow.
Those are the automatic repliesthat I'm having a little issue
with.
If you are generally out of theoffice, if you're going on
(12:47):
vacation yes, please set upthose out of office replies.
That's something that I'venoticed is when my professionals
don't get back to me andthey'll say oh, I'm so sorry, I
was out of town on vacation.
Great, I'm so glad that youwere able to unplug and enjoy
your vacation.
Why didn't you set up that outof office auto responder?
Because all that does is panicme and it panics my couple.
(13:08):
If I would have known that youwere going to be out of the
office, I could have let myclient know.
Oh, they asked them to email.
They're going to be out of townuntil next week.
I'll send them a follow-up then, but not telling me is not
going to help.
I think what professionals aredoing is, instead of having an
automatic responder, let's saythey're posting it on their
Instagram.
Not everyone's checking yourInstagram stories Not everyone's
(13:29):
following you just yet.
Exactly Not.
Everyone's following you, andnot only that, they disappear
after 24 hours.
So unless you're posting thatevery single day, how am I
supposed to know that you are atthe beach with your family?
Have an automatic reply whenyou should and that's going to
be when you're actually out ofthe office.
Speaker 2 (13:46):
I completely agree with you.
I even do it on my weddingweekends.
We're out celebrating with suchand such and we'll be back in
the office on such and such adate.
That way, couples, clients,potential clients, everyone
knows and they're not in theloop and not just thinking that
no one else is ever on the otherside of that computer when
they're reaching out to usExactly.
Speaker 3 (14:07):
This was such a great topic, thank you, aisha.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
Thank you so much, chrissy, for joining me and
sharing your insight on thistopic.
Now on to something borrowed Inthis segment.
We feature information from analternate source that I feel you
would be interested in.
For instance, fox News reportedthe story of how a US Air Force
(14:30):
veteran named Lily Mendoza ofWashington DC went viral after
making her own wedding cake.
Not only did her 27-secondvideo on Instagram receive over
7.8 million views and over1million likes, she also received
a few comments.
Some viewers were rooting forher, praising her creativity and
(14:51):
applauding her on how she saveda pretty coin, and others well,
they brought on the weddingshaming.
Wedding shaming is making funof someone else's wedding simply
because it doesn't align withyour taste or preference.
This is clearly not the way togo, but it happens.
Mendoza noticed how popular herpost was becoming while she was
(15:12):
on her husband's Starting over.
Mendoza noticed how popular herpost was becoming while she and
her husband were on theirhoneymoon.
Blown away by the many comments, she then shared a few of them
with her husband, who suggestedthat she simply put her phone
down.
Negative commentators wrotethat the cake looked unfinished
(15:34):
and they criticized the textureand color choice.
Mendoza wrote that she onlymade her own cake to become
famous.
However, that wasn't herintention when she initially
posted her video.
Just one month prior to her post, mendoza graduated from the
Culinary Institute of America,receiving her bachelor's degree
in Applied Food Studies with afocus on baking and pastry Not
(15:57):
that she owed anyone anexplanation.
So getting the chance tocelebrate her accomplishment and
showcase her talents on her ownwedding day seemed more than
appropriate.
She simply created somethingthat she loved, desired to fit
her style, her vision for herwedding.
She had no idea it would goviral and, although she enjoyed
(16:19):
the many commentators who showedpositive vibes, on the flip
side, the very ones who feltobligated to share their
unsolicited opinions with allthe wedding-shaming behavior
were the very ones who added tothe many likes, shares and views
that resulted in leadingMendoza to her viral success.
Let's face it, the weddingplanning Starting over.
(16:42):
Let's face it, thewedding-shaming is meant to tear
you down, but Mendoza didn'tlet it get to her.
The viral success opened thedoors for more exposure to her
passion and talent.
Here to discuss this with me abit further is Lori Hartwell,
ceo and founder of the CertifiedWedding Planner Society.
Thanks for joining me, lori.
Speaker 1 (17:03):
Oh, it's so nice to be with you and talk about this
amazing topic.
Speaker 2 (17:08):
Thank you, let's get right into it.
I want to start by saying that,as one of my mentors, one of
the things that I admire aboutyou is how professional you are
and how Jesus Starting over.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
No, my name's Lori.
Speaker 2 (17:27):
Starting over All right.
So and I want to start bysaying that, as one of my
mentors, one of the things thatI admire about you is how
professional you are in doingthe right thing and making sure
that you are showcasing yourselfin a positive light.
There's simply no room fornegativity in our CWPS community
, even on our private forum.
So thank you so much, Laurie,for setting the tone in our
(17:48):
community.
You're welcome, Absolutely.
Now, the World Wide Web can bea very scary place.
I personally don't quiteunderstand why folks feel the
need to weigh in with all thenegativity.
I know we can't control theopinions of others, but in cases
such as this, what advice canyou share with other wedding
(18:09):
pros that may feel the need toweigh in on certain situations,
wedding preferences and thepersonal decisions of others in
a negative light?
Speaker 1 (18:17):
Well, I mean, it all comes down to the fact that we I
feel like there's a lot ofpeople in this world that assume
that they know all of thedetails, they know everything
that there is to know about acertain subject or a certain
situation that someone's in, andthey feel like they can just
place judgment and just starttalking, especially behind a
(18:37):
screen.
A lot of people hide theirnegative opinions behind a
screen.
They would never say that tosomeone's face, though, most of
the time.
So I feel like people arefeeling too free to be negative
and very judgmental because it'swritten in a comment and so it
feels less personal.
It's personal, though it'salways going to be personal, and
(19:00):
so I feel like if we could justcome at things with less
assumptions of the fact that wejust think we know everything,
we don't know anything aboutanything.
We don't know anything aboutMendoza, you know we.
No one knew, when they wereputting all of those terrible
comments up, that she had herdegree, you know, in culinary
arts and with a focus on pastryand desserts.
(19:20):
No one knew that.
They just were very quick tojudge this particular person,
and that is just so hurtful.
So, unless you're willing tosay something and very you know,
whatever that critique may beto that person's face, you
probably should just keep it toyourself.
I mean, what are?
What did all of the parentalfigures in our lives teach us
when we were younger?
(19:40):
They always said if you don'thave something nice to say,
don't say anything at all.
I've heard that millions oftimes.
I live my life by that.
If I don't have anythingconstructive to add or it's
whatever I'm thinking is notgoing to inspire or help a
situation, I keep my mouth shutbecause it's just not.
(20:00):
My opinion is not importantenough to talk about it in a
negative way, especially in away that would shame or make
someone feel terrible aboutthemselves.
Speaker 2 (20:11):
I completely agree.
Wedding days are special and ifyou're a couple, you want to
see your vision come to life.
If you're a weddingprofessional, you want to help
make those visions come to life.
So what advice can you sharewith couples and wedding
professionals on how they canignore that negative?
Speaker 1 (20:27):
noise.
There's a lot of negative noisein the wedding industry and I'm
always really shocked when Ihear wedding professionals
shaming their clients whetherit's a current client or a past
client when it comes to whatcolors they've chosen or a
certain trend that they're justtired of seeing.
And, honestly, my couples aregoing to get whatever they want,
(20:48):
as long as what they wantdoesn't ruin my reputation.
So if they want something lessthan appealing, then maybe I
just won't post that particularwedding on social media.
However, if what they'rewanting is something that's
going to ruin my reputation forinstance, maybe they want
seating for only half of theirguests at their seated dinner
reception we're going to have tohave a chat, but I'm certainly
(21:11):
not going to shame them.
I'm going to basically talk tothem about why that particular
idea will probably not work out.
If they still want to go downthat path, then fine, maybe I
need to step down as theirwedding planner.
But if they simply selectedcolors that I don't love, what
does that have anything to dowith me at all?
And even with that being said,I'm going to take those ugly
(21:34):
colors and I'm going to helpguide my couples to help bring
those colors together in areally beautiful way rather than
an ugly way.
So my job is to guide and togive advice, but not to control
and not to take over, and Ithink we, as wedding
professionals need to rememberthat we're in a business where
people see trends, they lovethese trends and they want them
(21:55):
for their own wedding.
We should stop judgingeverybody for this.
I just don't understand whatall this judgment is for.
Shaming should never, everhappen.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
Now I know the importance of hiring, licensing
and insured wedding pros.
What advice would you give towedding planners and clients in
similar situations such as thisstory?
Speaker 1 (22:19):
Yeah, I mean, that's a really good question.
So, let's say, mendoza was oneof my clients and I put myself
in this position.
Okay, so she comes to me andshe says, listen, I got a degree
in culinary arts recently and Iwould really like to provide my
own wedding cake.
We would have to have a seriousdiscussion, and one that's very
much in depth.
(22:39):
I have a lot of questions forMs Mendoza.
She's one of my clients, right.
First and foremost, I wouldremind her about the contract
that she signed that stated thatyou're only going to be using
license and insuredprofessionals.
So that's always the forefrontof my mind.
If she says, though listen, butthis is something I deeply want
to do, what I would suggest islike either make the cake
(23:03):
sometime during the planningprocess and prove to me that
this sucker is not going to fallapart and crumble.
Let me make sure that the tasteis good.
Make sure that I don't die fromany food poisoning, like I'll
be your taste tester, right,it's amazing how far wedding
planners will go in pursuit ofour clients' happiness, but I
would want to make sure that Ican trust the product that's
(23:25):
going to be delivered on weddingday, because, again, that's one
of those things that canactually affect my reputation If
I'm working with someone who'sjust kind of doing their own
thing.
So that's first.
Now second, if let's say itdidn't go so well that first
cake that she makes and I'm not,it's not proven that the cake
is not going to be at theLeaning Tower of Pisa, and
(23:47):
things of that nature.
If we've got this problem, thenwhat I would suggest is maybe
she provide the cake for herrehearsal dinner, or maybe her
engagement party, or maybe forthe brunch after the day after
the wedding, or maybe one of hershowers, I don't know.
I'm just suggesting that maybeshe make the cake for something
other than the actual weddingday itself.
(24:08):
But I can tell you this as acertified wedding planner I
usually have it in my contractthat you have to be licensed and
ensured to even provide producton the wedding day.
That includes food, especiallyfood.
So I worry a little bit and Iwould either have to.
If she gave me an answer that Iwasn't comfortable with, I
(24:29):
could always step down as herwedding planner but wish her
well and hope for the best, or Icould make other suggestions.
But we would have a discussion,a discussion where shaming does
not come into play at all.
It's just a discussion so thatshe can understand where I'm
coming from and that I canunderstand where she's coming
(24:49):
from, and then try to find somecommon ground.
If you can't find that commonground, then we can go our
separate ways.
Speaker 2 (24:56):
I agree with everything you just said, Lori.
Thank you guys, I am one of mymentors, so thank you, you're
welcome.
Thank you again for weighing inon such an interesting topic.
You're welcome.
Next up is our old and newsegment.
This is where I'll bediscussing an old trend and
(25:17):
what's replacing it Now.
Speaking of going viral, contentcreators are taking weddings to
a whole new level.
When it comes to weddings, it'sevident that our couples are
hiring photographers andvideographers to capture the
memories of their special day.
On average, it takes thosewedding pros anywhere between
one to four months to return thefinished, edited version of
(25:39):
those photos and video filesback to their clients, in most
cases, the foot Starting over.
In most cases, the photogallery comes with hundreds of
photos to review and the videosaren't easily shareable to
social media.
And, let's face it, with thelimited timeframe allowed for
(26:00):
most reels and posts, mostvideos from our wedding pros
need to be cut down in order tobe shared on social media.
Couples want to see theirphotos and videos immediately.
The way they've cut the weightis by hiring wedding content
creators for their big day.
These social media marketingexperts make hundreds and up to
(26:20):
thousands of dollars and theyspend about six to 12 hours on
wedding days capturing footage,taking photos and giving couples
the luxury of seeing theirwedding day as a guest within a
matter of 24 hours.
In the world of social media,we're wanting everything right
away.
These couples want to relivetheir weddings immediately.
(26:42):
They want to see the behind thescenes footage of these
memories as soon as possible,and what better way to do so
than on their honeymoon?
With the flexibility thatcontent creators have, the
weddings can be booked in aslittle as one week to a few
months out.
The editing can be tailoredexclusively to what the couples
want, because the contentcreator can share a draft of
(27:05):
those 10 seconds to one minutevideos with their couples.
Edit and hit share in a matterof minutes.
Wedding content creators arecapturing those moments so that
your wedding party membersaren't tasked with it, taking
away their experience of simplyenjoying the day with couples as
well.
These creators are able to golive as they're commenting real
(27:26):
time and be as creative as theypossibly can From Instagram to
TikTok, even adding in the factthat there's a hashtag wedding
talk on TikTok with over 8.9billion views Just sending those
quick videos to couples allover the world to gain ideas
from and simply enjoy it.
It's a game changer.
(27:48):
Wedding content creatorsprovide an alternative when it
comes to capturing those weddingdays, so it's only right to tap
into that trend Now.
Don't get me wrong as acertified wedding and event
planner, I love working withyour traditional photographers
and videographers.
I'm definitely not taking awayfrom those wedding pros.
(28:09):
I admire what they do.
I see how hard they work onwedding days and I can only
imagine the work they put intomaking sure that the final
product would be edited toperfection.
But to see the wedding contentcreators on the rise with a
tradition that's barkinginterest for our clients just
adds another innovative layer tothe wedding day.
(28:30):
It has another vendor to ourapproved vendor list.
If we can experience the beauty,love, joy and happiness without
the weight, why not add thosewedding content creators to the
mix?
I am definitely not saying it'sthe beginning to the end of
hiring wedding photographers orvideographers.
It's just that the industry ischanging and this particular
(28:53):
wedding trend is on the rise andthis certified wedding planner
is here for the elevation.
I'm here for the journey inseeing the wedding industry take
flight, tapping into new andcreative territory.
That wraps up our October 2023wedding industry news.
Thank you so much for listening.
We look forward to having youjoin us next month here on the
(29:16):
Wedding Planner podcast.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
Brilliant, All right.
Speaker 3 (29:21):
Laurie just kill that .
Welcome to the Wedding Planner podcast brought
to you by the Certified WeddingPlanner Society.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Welcome to the Wedding Industry News.
It's October 2023 and I'm yourhost, aisha Garnett, certified
Educator and Master CertifiedWedding Planner with the
Certified Wedding PlannerSociety, where each episode
covers something old, somethingnew, something borrowed and some
news.
According to KTVB, channel 7News, in Boise, idaho, many
(00:37):
Treasure Valley couples are leftwith the worries of how their
big day will come together whenit comes to their wedding
decorations, after one of theirlocal wedding vendors stopped
communicating with them justdays after they paid their final
payment.
In today's world, the term forthis is also known as ghosting.
One bride says she booked thevendor in the spring of this
(01:00):
year and noticed a few red flagswhen the communication
afterwards wasn't the best, butshe didn't expect for the vendor
to completely stop respondingto all forms of communication
just a few days prior to herwedding day.
Nearly a dozen brides haveexperienced the same setback
from the same vendor, with someof their wedding dates fast
(01:21):
approaching.
The wedding vendor posted onsocial media stating that
they've been experiencing somemental health issues and they
starting that over.
The wedding vendor posted onsocial media stating oh, my
goodness, starting over.
(01:41):
The wedding vendor posted onsocial media stating that
they've been experiencing.
Why can't I say this.
How do you even know such anice thing about me?
Sorry, lori.
Starting over, the weddingvendor posted on social media
(02:09):
stating that they've experiencedsome mental health issues and
that they reach out to clientssoon.
Speaking specifically to thewedding industry, unfortunately
ghosting doesn't just happenbetween wedding pros and their
clients.
It also happens between vendors, heavily impacting vendor
relationships.
Vendor to vendor relationshipsimpact client to vendor
(02:32):
relationships as well.
If you are a weddingprofessional and I'll use the
term professional lightly inthis case but if you are a
wedding pro who is ghostingother wedding pros, it wouldn't
seem out of the ordinary toghost your clients.
In either case, it's a poor wayof doing business.
Joining me to weigh in on thistopic is Chrissy Thomas, vice
(02:54):
President of the CertifiedWedding Planner Society.
Thank you so much for joiningme, chrissy.
Speaker 3 (03:00):
I'm excited, thank you for having me, and this is a
topic that I'm really excitedfor us to dive deep into, so
bring it on.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
All right, let's jump right into it.
As a certified wedding planner,we are typically the first to
reach out to other weddingprofessionals on behalf of our
clients, whether it's by phone,email or maybe even in person.
We are there to help ourclients ask those important
questions, and we do our duediligence in making sure we are
choosing the right vendors toeven work with our clients.
(03:29):
So how important, would you say, vendor to vendor relationships
are in the wedding industry?
Speaker 3 (03:35):
Oh gosh, these are such important relationships.
To me, these relationships areessentially the backbone of the
wedding day being a success.
You know, teamwork is needed tocreate that amazing experience
for our clients and their guests.
So without it, a wedding daycannot happen seamlessly.
You know, on average, a weddingcan have between 15 to 24
(03:59):
wedding professionals.
That's not including the numberof assistants, the catering
team, the delivery team and soon.
That's a large amount of peoplewho are relying on each other
to be able to do their jobs.
So you know, think of it thisway your florist cannot set up
their gorgeous inner pieceswithout having tables, which may
(04:20):
come from your venue or yourrental company.
Your venue or your rentalcompany can't set up these
tables without a floor plan, andthis may come from your wedding
planner.
Your wedding planner can'tcreate the floor plan without
working with the venue andknowing what works within the
space, and so on and so on.
So, as wedding professionals,we cannot do our job unless we
(04:42):
work with each other and havesome sort of positive working
relationship.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
I completely agree with you, Kristy, 100%.
What are some tips you canprovide to wedding professionals
or clients when it comes tovetting the wedding
professionals they eventuallywant to work with?
Speaker 3 (04:59):
Voting wedding professionals is something that
we are so passionate here about.
I'm going to start that over.
Starting over Voting weddingprofessionals is something that
we are so passionate about hereat the CWP society, so much so
we have two podcasts dedicatedto vetting.
So we have a vetting weddingvendor podcast.
(05:20):
We'll start that entiresentence over.
Voting wedding professionals issomething that we are so
passionate about here at the CWPSociety.
We have an entire podcastdedicated all about vetting
wedding professionals, and notonly wedding professionals.
We even have a podcast aboutvetting your clients, and this
(05:43):
is all about the heavyimportance of doing your due
diligence.
Jesus Christ, I was doing sogood.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
I think I might start the whole sentence over.
Speaker 3 (05:54):
Okay, starting over, voting wedding professionals is
something that we are sopassionate about here at the CWP
Society, so much so that wehave two podcasts dedicated, all
about vetting people, whetherthat's vetting wedding
professionals and vetting yourclients, and this is all about
the heavy importance of doingyour due diligence in the people
(06:15):
that you recommend and thepeople that you hire.
These were recorded in May andJune of 2022, so make sure to
get those a listen.
But, to answer your questions,vetting your wedding
professionals is vital and it'sso important.
Wedding professionals need tohave a network of certified
wedding planners they recommendto their clients, so not just
(06:36):
your wedding planners having avendor list.
I don't like the way this isgoing.
Let me see.
I'm just going to start overwith that sentence.
Starting over To answer yourquestion, aisha.
I used to.
Okay, we're going to get thistogether at some point.
(06:58):
All right, starting over Toanswer your question, aisha,
wedding professionals need tohave a network of certified
wedding planners that theyrecommend to their clients.
As certified wedding planners,we are constantly recommending
wedding professionals to ourclients.
It's a huge part of our job.
Each of us have an approvenderlist and we are the repeat
(07:21):
clients for these weddingprofessionals, but are they
recommending us to their clients?
So how does recommendingwedding planners help engage
couples in the vetting process?
We see wedding professionals inall aspects of wedding planning,
not just the highlights oftheir career they post on social
media.
We see how well theycommunicate or if there's no
(07:43):
communication at all.
We see what their behavior islike at networking events if
they're professional or possiblyeven embarrassing themselves at
these events.
We see how they handle thepressure or those stresses of
the wedding day.
We know all about those redflags prior to them even
beginning to wave.
So it's important that weddingprofessionals have a team of
(08:04):
certified wedding planners theyrecommend, because we see
everything.
We see essentially outside theglorified beauty in this, on
Instagram and their website.
We see a professional for whothey truly are and that's going
to allow you to recommend.
Where am I going with this?
I'm going to start over.
Where do I want to start over?
(08:26):
I'm going to start over withthe B.
We see how well theycommunicate or if there's no
communication at all.
We see what their behavior islike at networking events, if
they're professional or possiblyeven embarrassing themselves.
We see how they handle thepressures or stresses of the
wedding day.
We know all about those redflags prior to those red flags
(08:48):
even beginning to wave.
So by having a network ofcertified wedding planners, as a
wedding professional you areable to make sure that your
clients are being taken care of,because we create and curate
and do our due diligence whenwe're creating our approved
vendor list.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
Thank you, Now, just like any other industry, the
wedding and event industry washeavily impacted due to the
pandemic.
However, it is slowly butsurely making its way back.
Do you think the pandemiccreated an epidemic of wedding
vendors not responding to theirclients and or other wedding
professionals?
Speaker 3 (09:23):
Yes, I 100% think it did, because what happened is we
were kind of flailing.
We were having to eitherpostpone or reschedule these
weddings and what was happeningis our calendars were getting so
booked and so filled that wewere overworking ourselves and
we were trying to communicatewith all of these clients and
(09:45):
these wedding professionals andwe were essentially drowning.
I think we gave each other graceduring that time period because
we knew that we were allexperiencing the same thing.
But now that things are gettingback to normal, now that we're
getting back to your normal setof events that you booked and
you're not overly booked, yourcommunication needs to go back
to what it was prior to thepandemic.
(10:05):
We need to be responding backto emails in a timely manner.
We need to be responding backto these couples.
This is our job, and what Ifound with couples is, when
their vendors aren'tcommunicating with them, that
creates a sense of panic inthese engaged couples, and that
is the last thing that we wantto do is add even more stress to
our clients because we, aswedding professionals, are not
doing our job by simplyresponding back to them.
(10:28):
That's crucial and we have toget back to the way that things
were.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
I completely agree with you, chrissy.
It's not a great feeling to beghosted.
When you reach out to someone,you expect a response, and we
were just talking about that.
You and I both know theimportance of keeping the lines
of communication open.
If there's no communication,there's no relationship.
What can wedding professionalsdo to keep those lines of
communication open with otherwedding pros, current clients
(10:55):
and even potential clients?
Speaker 3 (10:57):
I think this goes to how they run their business.
Sometimes I feel like, aswedding pros, we, and
entrepreneurs in general we mayforget that we are running a
business.
So you have to have steps andprocedures in place to make sure
that you are able to do yourjob and do your job well.
One thing that Lori actuallytaught me to help me post
pandemic was time blocking andcreating my days to where I knew
(11:22):
what I was doing.
From this block period to thisblock period.
Having a dedicated time in yourday where that is all you're
focused on is responding back toemails and messages from your
wedding pros and from yourclients.
That's going to be crucial inmaking sure that you're actually
able to run your business andrun your business well, I think.
Another thing that I'm seeing Ifeel like this is its own little
(11:44):
epidemic is the automaticreplies back to every single
email.
That's creating that disconnectof to me when I get an
automatic reply back that sayshi, welcome, thank you for
reaching out to 7Sparkle Weddingand Event Planning.
I will get back to you within24 to 72 business hours.
(12:05):
I'm getting this over and overand over and over again.
It is leaving a bad taste in mymouth.
As a wedding professional, younaturally should be responding
back to me within 24 businesshours.
That just should be a commonthing that you do as a
professional, because what'shappening with the engaged
couples when they get thismessage is they are feeling that
(12:26):
sense of oh, this person is toobusy for me.
If this is a potential clientreaching out to you and they're
getting back this reply, that'swhat I'm going to think as an
engaged couple.
I'm going to think, oh gosh,they can't be my wedding planner
.
They're clearly too busy rightnow.
Those are the automatic repliesthat I'm having a little issue
with.
If you are generally out of theoffice, if you're going on
(12:47):
vacation yes, please set upthose out of office replies.
That's something that I'venoticed is when my professionals
don't get back to me andthey'll say oh, I'm so sorry, I
was out of town on vacation.
Great, I'm so glad that youwere able to unplug and enjoy
your vacation.
Why didn't you set up that outof office auto responder?
Because all that does is panicme and it panics my couple.
(13:08):
If I would have known that youwere going to be out of the
office, I could have let myclient know.
Oh, they asked them to email.
They're going to be out of townuntil next week.
I'll send them a follow-up then, but not telling me is not
going to help.
I think what professionals aredoing is, instead of having an
automatic responder, let's saythey're posting it on their
Instagram.
Not everyone's checking yourInstagram stories Not everyone's
(13:29):
following you just yet.
Exactly Not.
Everyone's following you, andnot only that, they disappear
after 24 hours.
So unless you're posting thatevery single day, how am I
supposed to know that you are atthe beach with your family?
Have an automatic reply whenyou should and that's going to
be when you're actually out ofthe office.
Speaker 2 (13:46):
I completely agree with you.
I even do it on my weddingweekends.
We're out celebrating with suchand such and we'll be back in
the office on such and such adate.
That way, couples, clients,potential clients, everyone
knows and they're not in theloop and not just thinking that
no one else is ever on the otherside of that computer when
they're reaching out to usExactly.
Speaker 3 (14:07):
This was such a great topic, thank you, aisha.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
Thank you so much, chrissy, for joining me and
sharing your insight on thistopic.
Now on to something borrowed Inthis segment.
We feature information from analternate source that I feel you
would be interested in.
For instance, fox News reportedthe story of how a US Air Force
(14:30):
veteran named Lily Mendoza ofWashington DC went viral after
making her own wedding cake.
Not only did her 27-secondvideo on Instagram receive over
7.8 million views and over1million likes, she also received
a few comments.
Some viewers were rooting forher, praising her creativity and
(14:51):
applauding her on how she saveda pretty coin, and others well,
they brought on the weddingshaming.
Wedding shaming is making funof someone else's wedding simply
because it doesn't align withyour taste or preference.
This is clearly not the way togo, but it happens.
Mendoza noticed how popular herpost was becoming while she was
(15:12):
on her husband's Starting over.
Mendoza noticed how popular herpost was becoming while she and
her husband were on theirhoneymoon.
Blown away by the many comments, she then shared a few of them
with her husband, who suggestedthat she simply put her phone
down.
Negative commentators wrotethat the cake looked unfinished
(15:34):
and they criticized the textureand color choice.
Mendoza wrote that she onlymade her own cake to become
famous.
However, that wasn't herintention when she initially
posted her video.
Just one month prior to her post, mendoza graduated from the
Culinary Institute of America,receiving her bachelor's degree
in Applied Food Studies with afocus on baking and pastry Not
(15:57):
that she owed anyone anexplanation.
So getting the chance tocelebrate her accomplishment and
showcase her talents on her ownwedding day seemed more than
appropriate.
She simply created somethingthat she loved, desired to fit
her style, her vision for herwedding.
She had no idea it would goviral and, although she enjoyed
(16:19):
the many commentators who showedpositive vibes, on the flip
side, the very ones who feltobligated to share their
unsolicited opinions with allthe wedding-shaming behavior
were the very ones who added tothe many likes, shares and views
that resulted in leadingMendoza to her viral success.
Let's face it, the weddingplanning Starting over.
(16:42):
Let's face it, thewedding-shaming is meant to tear
you down, but Mendoza didn'tlet it get to her.
The viral success opened thedoors for more exposure to her
passion and talent.
Here to discuss this with me abit further is Lori Hartwell,
ceo and founder of the CertifiedWedding Planner Society.
Thanks for joining me, lori.
Speaker 1 (17:03):
Oh, it's so nice to be with you and talk about this
amazing topic.
Speaker 2 (17:08):
Thank you, let's get right into it.
I want to start by saying that,as one of my mentors, one of
the things that I admire aboutyou is how professional you are
and how Jesus Starting over.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
No, my name's Lori.
Speaker 2 (17:27):
Starting over All right.
So and I want to start bysaying that, as one of my
mentors, one of the things thatI admire about you is how
professional you are in doingthe right thing and making sure
that you are showcasing yourselfin a positive light.
There's simply no room fornegativity in our CWPS community
, even on our private forum.
So thank you so much, Laurie,for setting the tone in our
(17:48):
community.
You're welcome, Absolutely.
Now, the World Wide Web can bea very scary place.
I personally don't quiteunderstand why folks feel the
need to weigh in with all thenegativity.
I know we can't control theopinions of others, but in cases
such as this, what advice canyou share with other wedding
(18:09):
pros that may feel the need toweigh in on certain situations,
wedding preferences and thepersonal decisions of others in
a negative light?
Speaker 1 (18:17):
Well, I mean, it all comes down to the fact that we I
feel like there's a lot ofpeople in this world that assume
that they know all of thedetails, they know everything
that there is to know about acertain subject or a certain
situation that someone's in, andthey feel like they can just
place judgment and just starttalking, especially behind a
(18:37):
screen.
A lot of people hide theirnegative opinions behind a
screen.
They would never say that tosomeone's face, though, most of
the time.
So I feel like people arefeeling too free to be negative
and very judgmental because it'swritten in a comment and so it
feels less personal.
It's personal, though it'salways going to be personal, and
(19:00):
so I feel like if we could justcome at things with less
assumptions of the fact that wejust think we know everything,
we don't know anything aboutanything.
We don't know anything aboutMendoza, you know we.
No one knew, when they wereputting all of those terrible
comments up, that she had herdegree, you know, in culinary
arts and with a focus on pastryand desserts.
(19:20):
No one knew that.
They just were very quick tojudge this particular person,
and that is just so hurtful.
So, unless you're willing tosay something and very you know,
whatever that critique may beto that person's face, you
probably should just keep it toyourself.
I mean, what are?
What did all of the parentalfigures in our lives teach us
when we were younger?
(19:40):
They always said if you don'thave something nice to say,
don't say anything at all.
I've heard that millions oftimes.
I live my life by that.
If I don't have anythingconstructive to add or it's
whatever I'm thinking is notgoing to inspire or help a
situation, I keep my mouth shutbecause it's just not.
(20:00):
My opinion is not importantenough to talk about it in a
negative way, especially in away that would shame or make
someone feel terrible aboutthemselves.
Speaker 2 (20:11):
I completely agree.
Wedding days are special and ifyou're a couple, you want to
see your vision come to life.
If you're a weddingprofessional, you want to help
make those visions come to life.
So what advice can you sharewith couples and wedding
professionals on how they canignore that negative?
Speaker 1 (20:27):
noise.
There's a lot of negative noisein the wedding industry and I'm
always really shocked when Ihear wedding professionals
shaming their clients whetherit's a current client or a past
client when it comes to whatcolors they've chosen or a
certain trend that they're justtired of seeing.
And, honestly, my couples aregoing to get whatever they want,
(20:48):
as long as what they wantdoesn't ruin my reputation.
So if they want something lessthan appealing, then maybe I
just won't post that particularwedding on social media.
However, if what they'rewanting is something that's
going to ruin my reputation forinstance, maybe they want
seating for only half of theirguests at their seated dinner
reception we're going to have tohave a chat, but I'm certainly
(21:11):
not going to shame them.
I'm going to basically talk tothem about why that particular
idea will probably not work out.
If they still want to go downthat path, then fine, maybe I
need to step down as theirwedding planner.
But if they simply selectedcolors that I don't love, what
does that have anything to dowith me at all?
And even with that being said,I'm going to take those ugly
(21:34):
colors and I'm going to helpguide my couples to help bring
those colors together in areally beautiful way rather than
an ugly way.
So my job is to guide and togive advice, but not to control
and not to take over, and Ithink we, as wedding
professionals need to rememberthat we're in a business where
people see trends, they lovethese trends and they want them
(21:55):
for their own wedding.
We should stop judgingeverybody for this.
I just don't understand whatall this judgment is for.
Shaming should never, everhappen.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
Now I know the importance of hiring, licensing
and insured wedding pros.
What advice would you give towedding planners and clients in
similar situations such as thisstory?
Speaker 1 (22:19):
Yeah, I mean, that's a really good question.
So, let's say, mendoza was oneof my clients and I put myself
in this position.
Okay, so she comes to me andshe says, listen, I got a degree
in culinary arts recently and Iwould really like to provide my
own wedding cake.
We would have to have a seriousdiscussion, and one that's very
much in depth.
(22:39):
I have a lot of questions forMs Mendoza.
She's one of my clients, right.
First and foremost, I wouldremind her about the contract
that she signed that stated thatyou're only going to be using
license and insuredprofessionals.
So that's always the forefrontof my mind.
If she says, though listen, butthis is something I deeply want
to do, what I would suggest islike either make the cake
(23:03):
sometime during the planningprocess and prove to me that
this sucker is not going to fallapart and crumble.
Let me make sure that the tasteis good.
Make sure that I don't die fromany food poisoning, like I'll
be your taste tester, right,it's amazing how far wedding
planners will go in pursuit ofour clients' happiness, but I
would want to make sure that Ican trust the product that's
(23:25):
going to be delivered on weddingday, because, again, that's one
of those things that canactually affect my reputation If
I'm working with someone who'sjust kind of doing their own
thing.
So that's first.
Now second, if let's say itdidn't go so well that first
cake that she makes and I'm not,it's not proven that the cake
is not going to be at theLeaning Tower of Pisa, and
(23:47):
things of that nature.
If we've got this problem, thenwhat I would suggest is maybe
she provide the cake for herrehearsal dinner, or maybe her
engagement party, or maybe forthe brunch after the day after
the wedding, or maybe one of hershowers, I don't know.
I'm just suggesting that maybeshe make the cake for something
other than the actual weddingday itself.
(24:08):
But I can tell you this as acertified wedding planner I
usually have it in my contractthat you have to be licensed and
ensured to even provide producton the wedding day.
That includes food, especiallyfood.
So I worry a little bit and Iwould either have to.
If she gave me an answer that Iwasn't comfortable with, I
(24:29):
could always step down as herwedding planner but wish her
well and hope for the best, or Icould make other suggestions.
But we would have a discussion,a discussion where shaming does
not come into play at all.
It's just a discussion so thatshe can understand where I'm
coming from and that I canunderstand where she's coming
(24:49):
from, and then try to find somecommon ground.
If you can't find that commonground, then we can go our
separate ways.
Speaker 2 (24:56):
I agree with everything you just said, Lori.
Thank you guys, I am one of mymentors, so thank you, you're
welcome.
Thank you again for weighing inon such an interesting topic.
You're welcome.
Next up is our old and newsegment.
This is where I'll bediscussing an old trend and
(25:17):
what's replacing it Now.
Speaking of going viral, contentcreators are taking weddings to
a whole new level.
When it comes to weddings, it'sevident that our couples are
hiring photographers andvideographers to capture the
memories of their special day.
On average, it takes thosewedding pros anywhere between
one to four months to return thefinished, edited version of
(25:39):
those photos and video filesback to their clients, in most
cases, the foot Starting over.
In most cases, the photogallery comes with hundreds of
photos to review and the videosaren't easily shareable to
social media.
And, let's face it, with thelimited timeframe allowed for
(26:00):
most reels and posts, mostvideos from our wedding pros
need to be cut down in order tobe shared on social media.
Couples want to see theirphotos and videos immediately.
The way they've cut the weightis by hiring wedding content
creators for their big day.
These social media marketingexperts make hundreds and up to
(26:20):
thousands of dollars and theyspend about six to 12 hours on
wedding days capturing footage,taking photos and giving couples
the luxury of seeing theirwedding day as a guest within a
matter of 24 hours.
In the world of social media,we're wanting everything right
away.
These couples want to relivetheir weddings immediately.
(26:42):
They want to see the behind thescenes footage of these
memories as soon as possible,and what better way to do so
than on their honeymoon?
With the flexibility thatcontent creators have, the
weddings can be booked in aslittle as one week to a few
months out.
The editing can be tailoredexclusively to what the couples
want, because the contentcreator can share a draft of
(27:05):
those 10 seconds to one minutevideos with their couples.
Edit and hit share in a matterof minutes.
Wedding content creators arecapturing those moments so that
your wedding party membersaren't tasked with it, taking
away their experience of simplyenjoying the day with couples as
well.
These creators are able to golive as they're commenting real
(27:26):
time and be as creative as theypossibly can From Instagram to
TikTok, even adding in the factthat there's a hashtag wedding
talk on TikTok with over 8.9billion views Just sending those
quick videos to couples allover the world to gain ideas
from and simply enjoy it.
It's a game changer.
(27:48):
Wedding content creatorsprovide an alternative when it
comes to capturing those weddingdays, so it's only right to tap
into that trend Now.
Don't get me wrong as acertified wedding and event
planner, I love working withyour traditional photographers
and videographers.
I'm definitely not taking awayfrom those wedding pros.
(28:09):
I admire what they do.
I see how hard they work onwedding days and I can only
imagine the work they put intomaking sure that the final
product would be edited toperfection.
But to see the wedding contentcreators on the rise with a
tradition that's barkinginterest for our clients just
adds another innovative layer tothe wedding day.
(28:30):
It has another vendor to ourapproved vendor list.
If we can experience the beauty,love, joy and happiness without
the weight, why not add thosewedding content creators to the
mix?
I am definitely not saying it'sthe beginning to the end of
hiring wedding photographers orvideographers.
It's just that the industry ischanging and this particular
(28:53):
wedding trend is on the rise andthis certified wedding planner
is here for the elevation.
I'm here for the journey inseeing the wedding industry take
flight, tapping into new andcreative territory.
That wraps up our October 2023wedding industry news.
Thank you so much for listening.
We look forward to having youjoin us next month here on the
(29:16):
Wedding Planner podcast.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
Brilliant, All right.
Speaker 3 (29:21):
Laurie just kill that .
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