June 10, 2025 • 43 mins
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:01):
Raise the rudder, raise the sails.
Raise the sails. Captain, an unidentified ship is
approaching over. Roger.
Wait, is that an Enterprise sales solution?
Reach sales professionals, not professional sailors, With
LinkedIn ads, you can target theright people by industry, job
title, and more. We'll even give you a $100
(00:22):
credit on your next campaign. Get started today
at.linkedin.com/results Terms and conditions apply.
With the Planet Fitness Black Card you can bring a friend
anytime and so much more when you join today.
You heard that right, Conquer the stair climber with your
partner and climb. Enjoy a post workout recovery
session in the hydro massage anddo it all again with access to
(00:42):
any of our 2700 convenient locations.
So you coming get all the perks with the PF Black Card for $1.00
down and 2499 a month? Offer ends June 13th.
See club for details. Dude what?
(01:03):
I completely forgot what? Where's the Pixie?
I haven't seen him in so long. Yeah, no, we, I, I packed him
away. In the boxes when we moved.
OK, cool. OK, good.
Yeah, haven't you heard his podcast?
Is what do you mean his podcast?Is podcast inside the box He's.
Going to be doing a podcast inside that box right now.
Yeah, no, he's been probably is on right now.
But yeah, I just haven't unpacked him because he seems to
(01:23):
be liking it in there. He's got a whole whole podcast
sending around him living insidethe box.
That's so good. Yeah.
Shit. Can we listen to it?
Well, I don't know, it might be on right now.
Let's have a listen. Welcome back to Inside the Box
where we discuss all things box related this week on the box.
Is the box a steer or is it a cube?
(01:44):
There's been a lot of speculation recently as there if
the box is flat all round. And I'm here to tell you right
now, it's it's a box. So it's it's a cube.
I mean, I, I don't know where this came from that it's round.
I mean, it's always been flat. Wow, That's some that's some
riveting conversation from inside the box.
Yeah, I, I think it's doing some, some serious numbers.
(02:06):
So I think I just I just decidedto leave him in.
Yeah, no, fair enough, honestly.Well, that's good to know that
he's having a good time then. Yeah.
Anyway, welcome back to the wizard.
Welcome back to the wizard cell.The Wizard's Tower.
(02:26):
It was my birthday yesterday. Oh, was it?
Yeah. Thanks for that.
Yeah. Thanks for coming to the dinner
as well. I appreciate.
That. Oh yeah, right.
Yeah, Yeah. Well.
Happy birthday for yesterday. Yeah, I appreciate it.
We what'd you do? So Saturday night I had a few
mates over. Yeah, I know.
By the way, I know what he did. I'm just this is purely a
(02:47):
podcast. He he was aware that it was my
birthday. It wasn't.
Yeah. He's not just finding out on the
podcast live. Like, trust me, he did say happy
birthday. It's all good.
So. Oh, here you go.
What are those like? You just give me something like,
oh, happy birthday. Thanks man.
Thanks for your mouse. Yeah, I knew that I knew.
(03:07):
I knew that, yeah. So Saturday night, had a few
mates around. Yeah, that was a good night.
We, I think it was, I was sort of just came to play some Smash,
like some smash. Brothers.
Yeah, I. Was came to smash.
Yeah, yeah, my Bros came. Over we smashed.
Yeah. And then, yeah.
So we did that. And then it was a really good
night. And we, you know, just drank
beers and hung out. And then I went to I went to go
(03:28):
to bed. This is like the highlight.
Well, actually the low light of the night.
OK so I go. I end up walking into my room
and my mate has drank. You know he he partook and he's
passed out on my bed snoring. OK.
Yeah, like. Fuck's sake.
And then my other mates on the couch and I was sort of hoping
both of them would sleep on the couch and I'd have my bed to
(03:48):
myself. He's like an owl shack.
But anyway, so I was like right,I'm not sleeping on the couch.
So I push him over and we both share the bed and he's snoring.
He's snoring and I'm like fuck bro this is fucked.
Like I like roll him over and I'm like, this is crazy.
Anyway, he stopped snoring and I'm like, oh, OK.
And I start to like fall asleep.My eyes like starting to close.
And then he rolls over to my side and he's holding a Gatorade
bottle that he's open that he's obviously drank before bed and
(04:10):
just pours it all down my back. Oh my God.
He pours a cold Gatorade bottle all down my back.
Bro as literally as my eyes werelike closing, I was falling
asleep. Woke up just like yeah, so that
was what color was it? It was yellow.
I shouldn't pay. I shouldn't piss hold down my
(04:32):
back. It's.
Like, yeah, it's like a condition I've got, like I just,
it's not, yeah, it's not warm. At all Quite.
Refreshing, actually. Oh my God, dude, that's yeah
that. Sucks.
It sucks. So that was sort of a lot.
It wasn't like a. Throw up like you.
Didn't throw up on you, I just laughed.
I like, I was like oh fuck it, it's just like well done you got
(04:54):
me. You pranked me mid midnight
without even realizing it. Did he?
Realise he spilt it on you. No, he was, he was fully passed
out sleep and then I just grabbed it and put on the ground
like fucking hell bro. And then just slept in like half
Gatorade. So shit.
So angry I'm so. Angry.
It was so shit. Then eventually I got to sleep
and then he woke up and he's like, where's my phone?
(05:16):
I'm like pro, I'm going to sleepfor like an hour, please.
He's like rustling around tryingto find his phone and shit.
Yeah, So that was a bit of a lowlight, but the night was really
nice. Then we went out for dinner last
night. Jax was unable to come, which
was a bit a bit unfortunate, butit was whatever.
Yeah, I had. I had better things.
I was like, I was too busy. Like fucking like.
I was streaming TVI had a reallygood.
Night bro I'm Breaking Bad is ison and.
(05:39):
Yeah, I'm watching Zip Talk and yeah.
No, I'm kind of locked in right now.
I've got like 6 or 7 Tik toks been fired.
Like how can I leave it? You know, got a good house
TikTok run gallon. But yeah, we had we had pizza at
this place and it was really nice.
And then yeah, that was it was areally good birthday.
And then and then I've got like a holiday with all my mates
planned for next. Week.
So that's good. Yeah.
(06:00):
I mean, dude, like sleeping overat people's houses is always I
feel like it's always going to be a bad experience whether
you're the person that lives there or whether you're someone
sleeping over at someone's house.
I remember one time I, we had this big party and like, it was
at like my mate's place that like, lived on a farm basically.
Yeah. And like, heaps of us were like,
(06:21):
all of us would come out there and we'd all like, drink and
whatever. Anyway, I was sleeping there one
year. I mean, I slept there every
year, but anyway, so this one year that I was sleeping there,
I, I slept on the bed and one ofmy mates slept next to me.
And I didn't know this at the time.
I found out the hard way that hegrinds his teeth when he's
(06:42):
asleep. Like you can hear it.
Grind like like audibly hear himgrinding and it was like really
loud like. Like sounded painful.
And he was sleeping right next to me and I was like, oh, fuck.
And he sort of rolled over to the other side.
So it was like a little. Choir.
I was like, OK. This is good.
This is good and same sort of thing, but as I'm just getting
(07:02):
to sleep he just turns right over, face right next to my ear,
still grinding. His teeth.
The whole night, like dude, Oh my God I didn't know people
could grind their teeth that hard.
That loud too. I didn't know.
I was like, I didn't know it wasaudible and you knew what it was
like instantly. Oh yeah, you could see him
grinding. His teeth.
Oh no, I. Was like that pretty much Rich
(07:23):
wrote me off from like sleeping at anyones.
House. Yeah.
Ever again, Yeah. I was always, from then on, I
was like, I'm gonna sleep in my car to.
Sleep well I'm. I'm not going to.
Yeah, I'm gonna sleep on my broom or I'm going to fly home.
No, you wouldn't fly. I wouldn't fly home.
I wouldn't. I would make sure I didn't drink
and. Then fly, fly home.
(07:44):
Obviously good. I don't partake in the potion
and. Fly and flying?
No. No, you can't.
Potion and fly no. Even if you're taking a potion
that is supposed to enhance yourabilities.
Yeah, you know, even if I get, you know, attack buff, attack
buff or like a potion of night eye or something like that, you
still do not fly when you consume a big goggles.
(08:06):
Potion doesn't help you fly. That's.
That's a crazy why is that even a potion?
A big goggles. Potion, goggles, Potion, Potion,
Potion, potion, Potion of potion.
You don't want to be drinking potion of potion, man.
You don't. You don't even want to know that
thing that will floor you potionof intoxicated while flying.
(08:27):
That sounds fun. No, I'm joking.
Potion of I'm Real makes you really good at.
Flying potion of confidence. Yeah, potion of confidence.
Everyone looks good in the dark,even you.
Yeah, you don't. You don't want to be potioning
and flying so. That's terrible.
And then you went to the theatre, you went to the movies
without me on my birthday. Oh, yeah, dude, yeah, no, it
(08:49):
wasn't on your OK, OK, let's just let's stop this narrative
right now. No, yeah, no, dude, I saw, I saw
the Raka Raka guy's new movie. Bring her back.
Bring her back. Yeah, I was gonna like.
Was something something about talk to me, bring her back.
I don't know. I'm seeing please me.
Can be her? Can she talk to me over there?
Please talk to me. Can she come back?
(09:11):
Can you bring her back, please? Yes.
Where you're going? It was really funny.
My partner and I, Emma, we were.I was taking her on a date.
Yeah. And cute.
The throughout the day, I was like, yeah, we're gonna go see a
movie. Like what do you wanna see?
Dinner in a movie. Ben Yeah, dinner in a movie and
I was you know, we were talking about it was like there's two
movies on there's there's Lilo and Stitch and there's Bring Her
(09:34):
Back, which is a really I've heard it's a fucked up.
Horrible. Yeah.
And she's like, oh, yeah, like, either or, either or.
But you know, the last few days we've been talking about Lilo.
And stitch and. And I was like, yeah, yeah.
Well, all right, I'll let it. I'll let it be a surprise.
And then and I was not watching Lilo.
No. I, I, I was not gonna do that.
(09:54):
I've heard it's not. So Emma went in, fully unaware
she thought she was saying. We we were like driving there
and she's like. What are we like?
What are we saying? And I started.
I was. Like, I was seeing the horror
movie and she's like, oh, what'swhat's it called?
And I was like, it's called, it's called a horror movie.
Yeah. I couldn't remember it.
At the time, remember the name she's.
Like, oh, that's such a funny joke, we must be watching you.
Must be joking. And didn't realise until we got
(10:18):
into the theatre and the openingsequence is just like fucking
harrowing, the most harrowing like VHS tape stuff.
And then like the title comes like.
Like. Just horrific.
And she's like, we're not, we'renot watching Lilo and Stitch,
are we? I was like, no, so I'm not.
Where's Lilo? No, this is it.
No, this is it. This is what really went
(10:40):
different with the live action This.
Is what happens when you make a live.
Action A Lilo and Stitch horror movie would go kind of crazy.
It's just an alien that just wreaks havoc, Yeah, kills
everybody. Yeah, poor Emma.
So. No, but it was good.
Good movies, good, horrific. It really, it was like there's a
few scenes in it that are like so confronting.
(11:02):
It is. It's worth a watch.
It's really, really good. But it's pretty gory and it is
some like pretty serious themes,but it's really, really good.
Yeah, Yeah. I think it's like on par with.
Talk, Talk to me. I really like Talk to Me.
I thought Talk to Me is so good.Did I tell you that story?
We watched Talk to Me with all my mates.
I was like, oh, we're going to watch Talk to Me, really like.
And they're like, yeah, they'll watch it, watch that.
And then one of my mates fell asleep.
(11:24):
Yeah. I'm so sad I didn't record it
because I reckon it would have went crazy.
He was asleep and he was like asleep on his bed with his arm
out like this, like over the bed, like he's in it.
And I walked in and I grabbed his hand and went and like said
don't talk to me. And he woke up and he went what
the hell? Oh, that's so fucked up.
It was so funny. And after I'm like, I wish I
(11:44):
recall I was. So that happened.
I didn't. Just made that up.
Just made that just. Slipped into his hand and just
scared. I didn't like this one.
Talk to me, anyone. That would have been so peak at
the time as well. Oh my God.
I'm like, actually, sorry, so I didn't record it because it was
so funny. Well, it didn't happen.
It didn't. Happen.
If you didn't record it, it did not happen, yeah.
(12:06):
Oh, Wizards, race the rudder, race the sails.
Race the sails, Captain, An unidentified ship is approaching
over. Roger.
Wait, is that an Enterprise sailsolution?
Reach sales professionals, not professional sailors, with
(12:26):
LinkedIn ads. You can target the right people
by industry, job title and more.We'll even give you a $100
credit on your next campaign. Get started today
at.linkedin.com/results Terms and conditions apply.
With the Planet Fitness Black Card you can bring a friend
anytime and so much more when you join today.
You heard that right, Conquer the stair climber with your
(12:46):
partner and climb. Enjoy a post workout recovery
session in the hydro massage anddo it all again with access to
any of our 2700 convenient locations.
So you coming get all the perks with the PF Black Card for $1.00
down and 2499 a month? Offer ends June 13th.
(13:09):
C Club for details. So this is a new segment, but an
old segment, okay, if that makesany sense.
So. That's an old segment where I
come from. So, okay, it's top five, it's
(13:29):
top five lists. We've been doing it Last two
episodes. Yep, 3 episodes.
Last three episodes, yeah. Beaten the hell out of this this
idea. Well, you I'll tell you what,
it's bloody, Yeah. We'll get into it.
We'll get into it later on. So this is top five best places
in video games to get a beer. Oh, OK.
Yeah. In no particular order.
(13:50):
All right, hit me, Hit me with number. 1A gun #1 the League of
Legends. Stay with me, OK?
What? Which lane?
Which? Which lane Are we gonna be
drinking beer? In the steps of Summoners Rift,
specifically Blue side, where you're sitting on the steps and
you've got the shopkeeper next to you and you're looking out
(14:13):
over the Nexus and the towels are there and the Nexus is like
making cool noises and then you hear go minions spawn and you're
like sitting there just having abeer.
Watching the minions. Watching the minions go out and
then you're like, all right, grab my door and Blade head down
midline. Let's go.
You know what I mean? You've just you've just sunk
couple beers. You've got the shopkeeper right
there. Potions.
I need a health potion. I've drank too many beers.
(14:33):
Give me a health potion. That's pretty good.
Well, I need my swiftness. Beer.
I think it was Swiftness. You don't want to drinking Swift
coming out of the bass drunk as like.
Cartoon sound effects every timeyou go to run.
But yeah, so that's my #1. OK.
And next week I'll make the list, OK?
It's just 'cause I was playing. I've been playing a lot of
league lately. Imagine drinking a beer while
(14:55):
doing this. Sorry, nerdy legally is like my
number one. You just know the list is sorry
shit #2 World of Warcraft. Oh my God, that's not good #2
Skyrim, OK, in the arch mage quarters in front of the fire,
just after you've spent a long day dungeoning and teaching
(15:17):
classes. Yeah, that fire that's there
with like all the plants behind it and stuff.
It would smell like fragrant too.
There's that many, like plants and.
Stuff, yeah, it'd be like smellsa little bit bad, but like some
places would smell really good. Yeah, you've got the alchemy
bubbling. Fungus growing in there.
There's a little. Now that I think about it, a lot
of mushrooms just naturally growing up there.
(15:38):
Fuck man, Arch Major would stinklike shit all the time if that's
where. He's nice.
Oh, maybe. He'd be like the the wizard
from. Of Ratagast, Ratagast, Lord of
the Rings. He'd have mushrooms growing off
the side of them arch major window hole like that's.
Good #3 I haven't played this but I feel like you would
(15:59):
probably have an area in this game.
OK, OK #3 Cyberpunk. Oh side punk 2070. 7 I feel like
side punk would have a cool place to have a beer I.
Love that you're like top five best place to have a beer.
Never played the game, never played the game, but you might.
You might not do you. Want to finish this it?
Looks like it'd be a cool place to have a beer.
I think there's a lot of places that would be cool to have a
(16:21):
beer. The the main bar, the Afterlife
would be pretty cool to have a beer in is a bar.
So it's like saying the the bestplace to have a beer is the bar
is the place that serves beer. Well #4 World of Warcraft, any
Tavern, Anita Evan in World of Warcraft, or I guess on the
(16:42):
steps of a of a place with a Nexus.
I was thinking like you, this list would be like oh like
avatar the like Far cry the gamelike the tree that you can climb
like. Overlook the forest.
The summer's Rift 1 was like that I guess.
And then I got Breath of the Wild as #5 #5 is Breath of the
Wild. And I was saying like on top of
(17:03):
those like towers that like openthe map, just having a beer up
on one of them. Well, I actually haven't played
Breath of the Wild. I was trying to visualize it but
it's like some crazy as you. Link and like Zelda, Yeah,
they're like making out or something, I don't know.
I think they're the same person.Well, they I can't remember.
Oh yeah, that would be pretty tight.
That would be pretty tight. So there's a there's a good spot
(17:24):
in Cyberpunk actually, that you can like overlook.
It's in the anime. Where you like to watch the
Rockets take off? That would be kind of cool to
have a beer in. On the moon, yeah.
Like the moon and that, yeah. Be good place to just cry.
On the moon while. You watch Cyberpunk the anime
and just cry. All that's good so.
Yeah, I mean, not bad. Not bad.
(17:44):
Not happy with that top five. I think I should've got a bit
more top. 5. Well, I'm just saying my top
five. Definitely five places you could
have, yeah, I guess. I wouldn't say they're the.
Top five Someone's roughly sick,I think.
Top five? Probably.
What have you got? Resident Evil 7 in the
Hillbillies. House.
Probably. There's probably a good place to
have a beer. I don't know if there's like
(18:06):
places in video games that I like because a lot of video
games are pretty fucking scary. Yeah, yeah.
So I'm like what place would be would be good?
Elden Ring? Yeah, at the top of the herd
tree. Looking down.
Looking down that seems. Scary.
Over the Kingdom. I reckon there's a peaceful
place in Elden Ring like underground like with the like
(18:27):
that Night city would be cool. Oh, yeah, OK, I.
Remember the name of a beer? That'd be cool.
A lot of places in Elden Ring would be sick.
That actually would be really cool.
Yeah, there's a lot, yeah. Top five Elden Ring locations.
Maybe just do a beer, yeah. Next week, next week segment.
I'll let you get onto that one. I'm going to.
Have to play it now. Oh my God, we'll have to play
out, Yeah. That's good.
(18:48):
I like that. Yeah, that's the next top five.
Maybe I need to go more game instead of just doing like an
old top five. You know, it's a new segment.
It's an old but new segment. Like I said, we're still
learning. It's an old segment.
It's. A new segment top five places in
Simon's Ref on Legal Agents map.This steps that's one they're on
blue side. Steps 500 meters.
(19:08):
Oh, give me a minute. I've got them all.
Blue side steps, red side, red side steps.
OK, that's two. You probably do jungle.
You'll probably do top line looking down the river.
Yeah, you'd feet in the river. OK, you got Baron next to you.
Yeah. And then bot lane your feet in
the river you got dragon next toyou so.
What's the next segment? And then we could probably do
mid. Are we?
(19:29):
What's the next segment? Creatures criticism.
This week on Creatures Criticism, we're doing a little
bit of a spin on it. This week we're gonna be reading
out some comments that we've been getting on our tick tocks
and shorts, and some of them arequite they're they're giving us
(19:53):
some criticism. Some creatures are criticisms.
It's crazy having. Yeah, we talked about at the
start of last part how how harsheveryone's been on our shorts
and going after our. Some people just just do not
know how to either like conceptualize what a joke is but
also they get so blinded by wanting to be right and telling
(20:16):
you you're an idiot even though like the video has nothing to do
with. It has nothing, we're just
taking the piss anyway. Yep.
OK, so this first comment, you guess what video this is from?
This first comment is by. I'm not even going to shout him
out. The comment states.
I can tell these guys have neverhang on.
I can tell these guys never played an RPG in their life.
(20:38):
Oak Flesh gives you armour. It's a buff, especially since
you're a mage sacrificing healthfor magic or mana.
Mage armour is needed so you cantake basic hits. 170 likes.
Whoa. 170 people agree with thatwith that comment.
Brother. Well, that's from our most
(20:58):
recent top five worst Skyrim spells.
Yeah. Where we joke about the spell
oak flesh. And turning you into a trade
turning. You in which it doesn't do no
but we're just riffing on how wefunny that would be if I.
Understand that oak flesh just makes your skin tough.
Like wood, Like oak? And I'm telling you, every
comment is like this man Every. Single comment, give us another
(21:20):
one from this video. OK, I'll try and guess which
video it's from. OK me when I have 3 hours played
on. Skyrim not come on bro.
OK, it this guy's just spelling it.
It makes your skin hard as oak not actually turn into wood.
Yeah, I've played the. I know, I know, but it.
(21:43):
Doesn't turn you into a tray. They've clearly never played the
game. Novice difficulty players.
That one hurts. That one really does hurt.
Man I was on survival man fuck you bro I was eating mushrooms
and that shit. Yeah, it's so it's actually,
it's every comment is like, that's crazy.
Just saying yeah for. Not understanding that it's a
(22:03):
joke. We're clearly taking the piss.
Yeah, here we go. Have you tried hitting a tree
with a sword? Shoot it with an arrow, even an
axe? The tool is designed for cutting
trees. Has to hit it repeatedly
10/20/30 times before it finallyfalls.
A tree stands proud, it succumbsonly to the mightiest forces.
It wouldn't do much against a dragon, but put a person against
(22:24):
a proud oak. What?
Whoa. The oak will take the will take
his blows and only fall after ittakes his hubris down with him.
For you. For you see, nature is anything
but weak. Whoa, he's not wrong.
So we were just talking about. That's an hilarious.
(22:45):
Spell oak flesh. Yeah.
So I I commented, I replied to this and I said, hey, guys, so
this is actually a joke. You can tell because we're
laughing at each other the wholetime.
We're fully aware the spell doesn't actually turn you into a
tree, but just imagine how funnythat would be.
If you guys need any more jokes explained to you in further
detail, just shoot us the DNA. Appreciate that.
(23:10):
That's good. Yeah, so that's just one video.
Yeah. We've done a few top fives now
and everybody is not. Having weighing in, give me
another top five. Well now I have to find another
one. This next comment from another
video you can tell bro clearly hasn't used them.
(23:30):
They aren't just armor, they allprovide different buffs.
Pretty sure boots give you speedalso. role-playing aspect.
Honestly, have either of you even played the?
Game. Wow, that's definitely top five
worst Oblivion spells, yeah. Talking about.
Conjuring and. Conjuring boots again.
Actually insane. It's.
(23:50):
Made me sad to. Even to even comment and joke
about a game I feel like you have to have some understanding
of like it's. Fake.
Yeah, we we have to take it to know that you can just summon
gauntlets or just summon boots. People were like in the comments
were like, you can actually put all the spells together and
summon of it's like, yeah, I understand that, but we're not
talking about like putting spells together.
(24:12):
We're literally talking about the worst spell.
It's so good. On its own, conjuring gauntlets
sucks. Yeah, yeah, People are funny.
People are funny. I think.
I think. I think just.
That's like someone like buying a bike and being like, man, like
fucking riding a bike can be pretty hard.
And they're like, well, actuallyriding a bike is not a superior.
(24:34):
Have you ever heard of a car? You know, you can actually
drive? Yeah, buying a bike is actually
supposed to be hard. A lot of people use it for
exercise. And then going into like full
detail about like, well, bikes aren't supposed to be easy.
If you buy a geared bike, a geared bike is actually made for
people that that need a little bit more power.
What's? His name Neil Armstrong took
(24:54):
drugs to drive be able to ride abike.
Neil Armstrong Lance Lance LanceLance Armstrong actually has to
take drugs to ride a bike quick.Lance Armstrong needs to take
drugs. It's obviously not supposed to
be easy. You know he lost his.
Testicle The bike was made in 19with the Big Wheel.
The right man. All right, Yeah.
Wait, You know, have you noticedwe're actually also dressed up?
(25:16):
Or just lose. Wizards, we're taking the piss.
Sorry to break the it's so good.It's Oh my God.
People just take it so seriously.
It's really funny to read for sure.
Yeah, people get really angry. Maybe that's our fault.
Maybe we should preface every joke that we make by saying it.
It is a joke. Yeah, that's a good idea
actually. Yeah, maybe we should leave in
(25:36):
every comment now, like when we post a clip.
Explain. Just explain.
A whole joke. Hey guys, so this is actually a
joke. We're fully aware that the steps
of Scott, we're fully aware the steps of someone's roof might
not be the best place to ever been.
Actually, you can't drink beer in the summoner's.
Ribs physically can't even go toSummoner.
'S ribs. So this is actually a null and
void point to make. That I find best place in the
(25:58):
right they have made like. That actually wouldn't be fun at
all, because there would actually be an enemy trying to
attack the bar at all times. Think about that.
And yeah, yeah. And and the Nexus turret would
actually shoot you 'cause you'reso close.
Yeah, the fountain turret. Would one shut you up?
Shut the fuck up, holy shit. Oh, legal ledge.
(26:21):
If someone, I'm not even gonna beat anyone, not even gonna
entertain the idea the. Nexus turret.
The Nexus turret would suck my balls actually.
So. Fuck the Nexus turret, I'm
drinking beers on those steps, Idon't give a fuck drinking.
Beers on top of the Nexus turret.
Whoa. While it shoots at people?
While it shoots at. People while it shoots at every
person that comments on. That Oh, wow, yeah.
(26:46):
In a game, in a video, in Minecraft, in Minecraft.
Minecraft. A good place to get a beer.
Oh well. Yeah, I don't know where you'd
build your own house. Just build a bar in Minecraft
and get a beer. Well, this is sick.
Specifically world with. #70. 4/8/93.
Actually the snow Biome would have the best beer because it
keep it cold in the winter. This is actually incorrect.
(27:07):
You cannot make beer in Minecraft.
If you were to drink beer in Minecraft, it would be no longer
a kids game. Rated E for everyone and Mojang,
by wanting to make sure it can appeal to the most people
possible, does not want to introduce something as crude and
profane as. Alcohol as alcohol as alcohol.
No alcohol was originally made. Goblet of Fire, It's James and
(27:34):
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at.linkedin.com/results Terms and conditions apply Go Rolls.
Goblet of five prompts. You pull a prompt from the hat.
You pull a pump from the goblet.Read it out and then we talk
about it. How?
Did you put a a gobble of fire prompt?
Little gobble of fire prompts. That's where we say that every
time we did it. Did you put a prompt in the
(28:59):
goblin file? No, Sir, I guess so.
Did you put a depressing prompt in the goblin?
File. So basically we get a prompt and
then we talk about anyway you'llyou'll get it.
What's the prompt? We I've got to make some new
prompts. They're all so profound and
like, what have you created thatyou're proud of?
What's the most? What's the what?
What have I should have? I should have.
(29:20):
What have you created that you're proud of?
What's like but like the top onethe most?
What have I created that I'm proud of?
That you're most proud of? Yeah.
I mean, probably just my YouTubechannel just in general.
I mean, I'm gonna think that's the most proud thing I've done
in terms of videos. I still really like the caving
video I did because it really, it brought me out of my comfort
(29:41):
zone. I went fucking.
Caving, which is just. I never would have done that if.
It wasn't for a YouTube video. Yeah, that's cool.
And it was A and the, the whole I did like I opted for all the
worst things that you could do in The Cave 'cause he'd like
give you options like, oh, this is the easy way, this is the
hard way. And I did all the hard things
for the video too. Like on purpose.
(30:02):
I was like, fuck, I gotta do thehard thing 'cause it's for the
video. It did the push myself.
Did the devil's anus? Yeah, dude, they always called
something. Like, felt like I nearly fucking
drowned in one of them. Like it was, yeah, it was
intense. Called the killer, yeah.
So I'm most proud of that. Or like the Minecraft series, I
suppose. Yeah, Minecraft.
Series great. But yeah, I think I just
(30:24):
checked, I think I tallied it up161 million views.
Just on YouTube. I mean, you've got a billion
views now. Yeah.
Yeah, that's crazy. I saw that post.
You know that's crazy. Yeah, I just reached a billion
views on YouTube all together. That's mental.
Yeah. Yeah, what about?
What about you, man? Most thing I'm proud of.
I'm proud of our friendship. What I created.
(30:46):
Yeah. Single handedly.
OK. It was tough.
Yeah, well, it was tough to force myself upon this
friendship. And I kept saying no.
Don't a friendship assaulted you?
I don't. Want to be friends with you man,
but you just keep showing up andstuff.
And I was like, I guess don't you just shut up my house one
day? Now I'm dressed as a wizard and
we've got a podcast together. Yeah.
Who's laughing now? Man, I think I was proud.
(31:10):
I really like this podcast. I feel like I've put a lot of
effort into it. And I feel like it's not that,
like, you didn't help me create it, but it's like, been like a
little baby of mine. Yeah.
And I've been really enjoying doing it.
Yeah, probably this podcast in the thing.
Yeah, I mean, you've, you've come up with most of the
segments and you're always the guy that brings the structure to
it, so. Yeah, and we're still learning.
(31:32):
It's fun to keep exploring it and making it better.
And yeah, we have like ideas forit's cool and bouncing ideas.
That's like the big thing too. Yeah, for sure.
Anyway. Next prompt is what's your
favorite joke? Probably where I joke about oak
flesh the spell and and just howfunny it would be if you cast it
and then you turn to a train. That's a really good one.
(31:52):
Like people broke into your house and like tried to rob.
You while you were turning into a train.
That's that's really funny. Don't give me wrong.
That's a really great drive. Yeah, but I don't want to be
that guy. But technically in the game you
actually don't turn into a. Tree.
Yeah, No, that's actually a goodpoint.
I don't. Want to see a joke?
Yeah, I'm sorry. I don't want to say I.
Don't even know why I said that.My favorite joke is is where I
(32:14):
just explain exactly what a spell is and why it's actually.
Really good. My favorite joke is when people
hate comment on people's like, Ithink that's hilarious.
It's funny, what's these are I got to change these problems.
They get like too broken out. What is What is this the thing
you are most sad of in your lifethat you regret the most?
What's your biggest regret? Well, it just says trauma.
(32:36):
Question mark trauma. If you could, if you could take
back your first heartbreak, would you?
What small insignificant thing gives you joy?
Is there something in your life that you're like, oh, I'm so
glad I do that. When I get to do it, I've got
mine. I'll, I'll say mine.
OK. I really like make the breakfast
that I've got going on right nowand making this, I put like
(32:59):
cottage cheese, avocado on toast, egg fried like, and make
it and I really a bit of lemon squeeze on top.
Now it's like seasonal bagel seed.
Like make it a really nice, likeway to start the day.
Yeah. I find I find I really enjoy
that. And then I try and savor it but
I eat too quick and just destroyit in like half a second.
I mean that ritual routine's really.
Good. Yeah.
(33:19):
So I've been doing that, which is really nice.
That brings me a bit of joy. Something that I do fuck, this
is odd, it is tough. Something that isn't
insignificant, but something that does bring me joy's every
morning waking. Up.
With just waking up, Oh my God. I made the other night.
I go to sleep every night thinking I'm never gonna wake
up. Waking up and having Frank next
(33:41):
to me, yeah. And then Frank, I say good
morning to him and he wakes up and then he climbs on.
Top of me and then we have. Like a little cuddle together
every morning. It's kind of like he like we get
up together, like him, him and Ilike it's always like he's like,
all right, let's get up and I'm like, all right, let's go, come
on. Then we like cuddle and then we
(34:02):
go and then we start our morning.
It's always such a good way to start.
Every morning, that's nice. And then Emma wakes up in her
doggy bed because. Frank's kicked around.
In the bed. And then he's like Emma, go sit,
sit before I feed her breakfast.You want you want your coffee
Sid shake. Sometimes it's really funny to
like if, if we're like eating stuff like Emma and I and
(34:24):
Frank's like begging for it, It's really funny to like get
Frank to like sit and shake and then feed it to him and then get
Emma to do the same and Frank's like.
What the? Fuck is going on here I.
Swear, I swear I saw her go to the carpet and get food out by
herself. I didn't know she had to do
tricks as well, Emma. I'm like shake.
Emma's just sitting there, so angry.
(34:45):
Yeah, I'm like, yeah, Frank, that's right.
Everyone has to do it. Everyone has to do.
It's a good way to teach him. You know, that's so funny.
How important is a wizard's hat to a wizard?
Not that important because I keep not wearing it.
You know, I would say it's pretty important, but you never.
Wear I never. Wear it, never wear the hat.
Yeah, literally wearing it todaythough.
And I never put my the hood up. I mean, I'm wearing a beanie
(35:08):
today because you were wearing the hat.
And I was like, oh, maybe I should wear a hat.
Kind of. It was either this or a cowboy.
Hat. No, just is that the other
beanie? Yeah, yeah, not that important.
I would say. Gandalf doesn't really wear his.
Unless you're like pulling rabbits out or impressing Oh
yeah, they're only good for revealing.
Things. Yeah, good for storage.
Sometimes I put my. Staff in the hat and I put on
that like, I don't know. Yeah, that's true.
(35:28):
They're good for storage. Yeah, Yeah.
They're not bad. They don't give you that much of
A buff city, I would say no, they don't give you much of A
buff. It's more of you.
It's more, yeah. Do you do his?
Here's another prompt. Yeah.
Another prompt. What the hell just happened?
I thank God this. My morning ritual is just making
sure I don't have an aneurysm every morning.
Actually, do you have a wizard apprentice?
(35:51):
Yeah, we do. We murdered him.
Yeah, we did have. One.
Well, you murdered him actually,as a prank.
Pretty funny though. Yeah, it was funny.
I mean, he didn't say it. Can't they?
I mean, hey, look, you know, if if YouTube starts paying us more
and the podcast starts making money, maybe we'll get another.
Apprentice. Yeah, yeah.
I'll be down for that. Right now we're just strictly
(36:12):
magical interns. I like to think the listeners
are all our present apprentices.We're like so true grand
Wizards. Oh.
Wow. Kind of like a head of like,
like I'd say a cult. I'd say it's.
Kind of like a cult. Grand Wizards.
Cults part of a clan. Clan, yeah, clan's probably a
better one. I'd say, I'd say we're, we're
(36:32):
simply fully qualified with yeah, yeah.
I'd say everyone's our apprentice.
Like we've got inquiries, peoplesend us in, feel free.
It's really. Funny actually, because I was we
were talking about the the robe situation today and we're like
man, like we're both wearing black robes.
Like we need like more colourfulrobes.
And I'm not even the two coloursI suggested was maybe one of us
is like in a white robe and the other ones in like a purple
(36:54):
robe. Just thinking then, yeah, I just
put two and two together probably.
Probably not good. Colours we should stay.
Away from, I agree. Yeah, yeah.
I've just been looking up Grand Wizard.
Outfit Oh, this one looks good. Well, the hood covers your whole
face. That's awesome.
It's so pointed. Yeah, so probably.
Not yeah, not not true. Yeah, yeah, we've.
(37:16):
Got a lot of people in the Souththat.
Listen to our podcast, Wizards to our Fans.
We're they're talking about video games for.
Another one join this clan. Yeah, talk more about Assassin's
Creed Shadows. No.
Man, yeah. Wrong.
Podcast. I hate how Snape.
Talk about Snape. Man, talk about Snape in the
(37:36):
caustic. Yeah, that's my tower.
Oh. No.
What are we talking? We've turned this into a bad
pod. All right, what?
Who cut these out? Dude, just let them.
Let them you know. All right, what mythical
creature would you want as a pet?
Oh, that's a good question. Frank's a bit of a mythical
gracious on dance. He can be.
(37:57):
I reckon something that you can that's a pet but also like is
useful. Yeah, like a dragon.
Like a dragon that you can ride.That'd be kind of Griffin.
A Griffin would be cool. Yeah, or just like, just like a
like a phoenix would be cool. I feel like Dumbledore just had
it just made with that. Yeah, Phoenix.
Yeah, he'll tears heel. Although there's never an expiry
(38:19):
date on it, which could be exhausting.
You're like, fuck, this Phoenix is gonna be around forever.
Yeah, this is a big responsibility.
It's like when people buy they're turtles and they don't
realize they live hundreds of years and they keep growing
like, oh look, we got a penny, turtle.
It's like it's not going to be apenny.
No, you do know that, right? Like it will be a giant
tortoise. It lives for a long.
Time. That's a good point.
That's why they actually banned them in the Uki think now.
(38:41):
Because they just lived for so long.
There was just so many people buying them, thinking they're
cute, not realizing they live like 100 years and it's like a
family responsibility. I had a turtle.
Do you want me to tell a really messed up turtle story?
I can tell it's pretty funny. All right.
I want to probably trigger warnings involves involves.
Involves a turtle. Involves a turtle and death.
OK, so I had this long neck turtle I found on my
(39:03):
grandmother's backyard when she was moving house, and I was so
excited. My oh, my turtle's my favorite
animal. Yeah.
Ninja Turtles loved it. You know what I mean?
I could not believe it. This is like I was like 8.
This is the hype of my Ninja Turtles craving.
I found a turtle. Oh, God.
Is it universe? Do you want it or something?
To turn into a ninja. Turtle, yeah.
Yeah, radioactive waste. I put it in the microwave.
Now I get my old Leonardo. Microwaves are way too active.
(39:26):
If I put a turtle in the microwave in 20.
Minutes or not that I wasn't that dumb, but I was like, Oh my
God, I got this turtle. And then dad was like, OK, And
then he made like a pond for theturtle.
Yeah. And then the pond got really
like, murky and grain. I was like, dude, Dad, we've got
to get a pump. He's like, no, I'll just keep
changing the water. And it just kept getting grain
and just wouldn't do it. I was 8.
Like, I wasn't taking care of this turtle.
Yeah. And he fed it cat food because
(39:46):
he was like, because he couldn'tbe fucked.
You know, what turtles ate so wecan.
And then he would eat the cat food and it would, like, seem to
be enjoying it. Yeah.
And I was like, oh, say he likesthe cat food.
And I'm like, come on, like, this is my pet.
Like, yeah. Can we show a bit more love?
Anyway, there's one day all the family was around for, like,
someone's birthday. And then everyone's like, oh,
can we see the turtle? Can we see the turtle?
Like all the kids, you know, four or five, you know, yeah.
That's like, yeah, no worries. He, like, rolls up his sleeve to
(40:08):
get through this murky green bullshit water.
Yeah. He goes, oh, yeah, got him,
pulls him out. And he's literally just hanging
out of his shell. Oh.
And all in front of all my nephews and little cousins and
stuff. And I'm just like, it was so
fun. My God.
And dad's like, oh, he's just sleeping.
He's straight back in the water.OK.
We saw the turtle moving on. Oh.
(40:31):
Let's go see our Let's go see our cat's grave now.
What happened? I guess he just dad just didn't
feed him or he just like the water.
Wouldn't it was fun. That's I was so sad.
Yeah, that was brutal. I know.
Poor turtle. We literally Yeah.
Should have left him. God damn I think they eat like
you can buy like bloodworm cubesor something.
There's like a just give it lettuce or something like
(40:52):
fucking cat food, dry cat food. You just throw it in the water
and be like, yeah, be right. Oh man, yeah, that's.
Not I don't wanna help my dad asbeing, but I just he just yeah.
No, he killed. No, he killed that.
He killed that turtle. He did.
We should we should call the RSPCA on him right now, 20 years
in advance. Yeah, anyway, God, that's.
Horrible. Anyway, double it.
(41:13):
A5. Prompts bro brings it down.
Oh my God, they're deep, deep traumatic moment parents have
ever done to a turtle. To a turtle that wasn't really.
I feel like this one you didn't copy and paste.
Really wanted to tell that story.
How do I learn magic? I can join our apprentice
college for 995 a month. Yeah, we actually have a course
if you want to buy. Just join.
(41:33):
You got to actually. That's how you learn, Yeah.
Subscribing to this YouTube channel.
That is how you learn. That's how you learn, yeah.
It just happens and if it doesn't work, unsubscribe and
then. Resubscribe or if it doesn't
work, make a new YouTube account.
Oh yeah, subscribe with that one'cause sometimes the first one,
the magic doesn't get through. So then you.
Yeah. Make sure you hit the.
Bell icon. The bell icon's really important
(41:53):
too. And then you've also I just got
to play out live podcasts on loop.
I'd go to sleep listening to thepodcast so the IT gets in like
click on the playlist, just let it play through, repeat.
I reckon maybe like at least 500,000 times.
Probably. Probably, at least, yeah.
And then you sort of, then you'll start to feel a bit of
(42:14):
magic. Going on, yeah.
And don't skip the ads. That's super important as well,
actually. Click on them, click on the ads,
Yeah. Click on the ads, yeah.
And buy the product. Buy the buy the product through
the link. I think that's how it works.
Yeah, yeah. Well, that's all the time we
have on the Wizards Tower. If you'd like to reach the
Wizards, you can send her now tothe Wizards Tower pod@gmail.com
(42:35):
and you can also follow us on Instagram and TikTok, whatever
the hell that is. Anyway, don't forget to grab
your hat, grab your star, and we'll see you on the next
episode of the Wizards Tower. With the Planet Fitness Black
(42:59):
Card you can bring a friend anytime and so much more when
you join today. You heard that right, Conquer
the stair climber with your partner and climb.
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(00:42):
any of our 2700 convenient locations.
So you coming get all the perks with the PF Black Card for $1.00
down and 2499 a month? Offer ends June 13th.
See club for details. Dude what?
(01:03):
I completely forgot what? Where's the Pixie?
I haven't seen him in so long. Yeah, no, we, I, I packed him
away. In the boxes when we moved.
OK, cool. OK, good.
Yeah, haven't you heard his podcast?
Is what do you mean his podcast?Is podcast inside the box He's.
Going to be doing a podcast inside that box right now.
Yeah, no, he's been probably is on right now.
But yeah, I just haven't unpacked him because he seems to
(01:23):
be liking it in there. He's got a whole whole podcast
sending around him living insidethe box.
That's so good. Yeah.
Shit. Can we listen to it?
Well, I don't know, it might be on right now.
Let's have a listen. Welcome back to Inside the Box
where we discuss all things box related this week on the box.
Is the box a steer or is it a cube?
(01:44):
There's been a lot of speculation recently as there if
the box is flat all round. And I'm here to tell you right
now, it's it's a box. So it's it's a cube.
I mean, I, I don't know where this came from that it's round.
I mean, it's always been flat. Wow, That's some that's some
riveting conversation from inside the box.
Yeah, I, I think it's doing some, some serious numbers.
(02:06):
So I think I just I just decidedto leave him in.
Yeah, no, fair enough, honestly.Well, that's good to know that
he's having a good time then. Yeah.
Anyway, welcome back to the wizard.
Welcome back to the wizard cell.The Wizard's Tower.
(02:26):
It was my birthday yesterday. Oh, was it?
Yeah. Thanks for that.
Yeah. Thanks for coming to the dinner
as well. I appreciate.
That. Oh yeah, right.
Yeah, Yeah. Well.
Happy birthday for yesterday. Yeah, I appreciate it.
We what'd you do? So Saturday night I had a few
mates over. Yeah, I know.
By the way, I know what he did. I'm just this is purely a
(02:47):
podcast. He he was aware that it was my
birthday. It wasn't.
Yeah. He's not just finding out on the
podcast live. Like, trust me, he did say happy
birthday. It's all good.
So. Oh, here you go.
What are those like? You just give me something like,
oh, happy birthday. Thanks man.
Thanks for your mouse. Yeah, I knew that I knew.
(03:07):
I knew that, yeah. So Saturday night, had a few
mates around. Yeah, that was a good night.
We, I think it was, I was sort of just came to play some Smash,
like some smash. Brothers.
Yeah, I. Was came to smash.
Yeah, yeah, my Bros came. Over we smashed.
Yeah. And then, yeah.
So we did that. And then it was a really good
night. And we, you know, just drank
beers and hung out. And then I went to I went to go
(03:28):
to bed. This is like the highlight.
Well, actually the low light of the night.
OK so I go. I end up walking into my room
and my mate has drank. You know he he partook and he's
passed out on my bed snoring. OK.
Yeah, like. Fuck's sake.
And then my other mates on the couch and I was sort of hoping
both of them would sleep on the couch and I'd have my bed to
(03:48):
myself. He's like an owl shack.
But anyway, so I was like right,I'm not sleeping on the couch.
So I push him over and we both share the bed and he's snoring.
He's snoring and I'm like fuck bro this is fucked.
Like I like roll him over and I'm like, this is crazy.
Anyway, he stopped snoring and I'm like, oh, OK.
And I start to like fall asleep.My eyes like starting to close.
And then he rolls over to my side and he's holding a Gatorade
bottle that he's open that he's obviously drank before bed and
(04:10):
just pours it all down my back. Oh my God.
He pours a cold Gatorade bottle all down my back.
Bro as literally as my eyes werelike closing, I was falling
asleep. Woke up just like yeah, so that
was what color was it? It was yellow.
I shouldn't pay. I shouldn't piss hold down my
(04:32):
back. It's.
Like, yeah, it's like a condition I've got, like I just,
it's not, yeah, it's not warm. At all Quite.
Refreshing, actually. Oh my God, dude, that's yeah
that. Sucks.
It sucks. So that was sort of a lot.
It wasn't like a. Throw up like you.
Didn't throw up on you, I just laughed.
I like, I was like oh fuck it, it's just like well done you got
(04:54):
me. You pranked me mid midnight
without even realizing it. Did he?
Realise he spilt it on you. No, he was, he was fully passed
out sleep and then I just grabbed it and put on the ground
like fucking hell bro. And then just slept in like half
Gatorade. So shit.
So angry I'm so. Angry.
It was so shit. Then eventually I got to sleep
and then he woke up and he's like, where's my phone?
(05:16):
I'm like pro, I'm going to sleepfor like an hour, please.
He's like rustling around tryingto find his phone and shit.
Yeah, So that was a bit of a lowlight, but the night was really
nice. Then we went out for dinner last
night. Jax was unable to come, which
was a bit a bit unfortunate, butit was whatever.
Yeah, I had. I had better things.
I was like, I was too busy. Like fucking like.
I was streaming TVI had a reallygood.
Night bro I'm Breaking Bad is ison and.
(05:39):
Yeah, I'm watching Zip Talk and yeah.
No, I'm kind of locked in right now.
I've got like 6 or 7 Tik toks been fired.
Like how can I leave it? You know, got a good house
TikTok run gallon. But yeah, we had we had pizza at
this place and it was really nice.
And then yeah, that was it was areally good birthday.
And then and then I've got like a holiday with all my mates
planned for next. Week.
So that's good. Yeah.
(06:00):
I mean, dude, like sleeping overat people's houses is always I
feel like it's always going to be a bad experience whether
you're the person that lives there or whether you're someone
sleeping over at someone's house.
I remember one time I, we had this big party and like, it was
at like my mate's place that like, lived on a farm basically.
Yeah. And like, heaps of us were like,
(06:21):
all of us would come out there and we'd all like, drink and
whatever. Anyway, I was sleeping there one
year. I mean, I slept there every
year, but anyway, so this one year that I was sleeping there,
I, I slept on the bed and one ofmy mates slept next to me.
And I didn't know this at the time.
I found out the hard way that hegrinds his teeth when he's
(06:42):
asleep. Like you can hear it.
Grind like like audibly hear himgrinding and it was like really
loud like. Like sounded painful.
And he was sleeping right next to me and I was like, oh, fuck.
And he sort of rolled over to the other side.
So it was like a little. Choir.
I was like, OK. This is good.
This is good and same sort of thing, but as I'm just getting
(07:02):
to sleep he just turns right over, face right next to my ear,
still grinding. His teeth.
The whole night, like dude, Oh my God I didn't know people
could grind their teeth that hard.
That loud too. I didn't know.
I was like, I didn't know it wasaudible and you knew what it was
like instantly. Oh yeah, you could see him
grinding. His teeth.
Oh no, I. Was like that pretty much Rich
(07:23):
wrote me off from like sleeping at anyones.
House. Yeah.
Ever again, Yeah. I was always, from then on, I
was like, I'm gonna sleep in my car to.
Sleep well I'm. I'm not going to.
Yeah, I'm gonna sleep on my broom or I'm going to fly home.
No, you wouldn't fly. I wouldn't fly home.
I wouldn't. I would make sure I didn't drink
and. Then fly, fly home.
(07:44):
Obviously good. I don't partake in the potion
and. Fly and flying?
No. No, you can't.
Potion and fly no. Even if you're taking a potion
that is supposed to enhance yourabilities.
Yeah, you know, even if I get, you know, attack buff, attack
buff or like a potion of night eye or something like that, you
still do not fly when you consume a big goggles.
(08:06):
Potion doesn't help you fly. That's.
That's a crazy why is that even a potion?
A big goggles. Potion, goggles, Potion, Potion,
Potion, potion, Potion of potion.
You don't want to be drinking potion of potion, man.
You don't. You don't even want to know that
thing that will floor you potionof intoxicated while flying.
(08:27):
That sounds fun. No, I'm joking.
Potion of I'm Real makes you really good at.
Flying potion of confidence. Yeah, potion of confidence.
Everyone looks good in the dark,even you.
Yeah, you don't. You don't want to be potioning
and flying so. That's terrible.
And then you went to the theatre, you went to the movies
without me on my birthday. Oh, yeah, dude, yeah, no, it
(08:49):
wasn't on your OK, OK, let's just let's stop this narrative
right now. No, yeah, no, dude, I saw, I saw
the Raka Raka guy's new movie. Bring her back.
Bring her back. Yeah, I was gonna like.
Was something something about talk to me, bring her back.
I don't know. I'm seeing please me.
Can be her? Can she talk to me over there?
Please talk to me. Can she come back?
(09:11):
Can you bring her back, please? Yes.
Where you're going? It was really funny.
My partner and I, Emma, we were.I was taking her on a date.
Yeah. And cute.
The throughout the day, I was like, yeah, we're gonna go see a
movie. Like what do you wanna see?
Dinner in a movie. Ben Yeah, dinner in a movie and
I was you know, we were talking about it was like there's two
movies on there's there's Lilo and Stitch and there's Bring Her
(09:34):
Back, which is a really I've heard it's a fucked up.
Horrible. Yeah.
And she's like, oh, yeah, like, either or, either or.
But you know, the last few days we've been talking about Lilo.
And stitch and. And I was like, yeah, yeah.
Well, all right, I'll let it. I'll let it be a surprise.
And then and I was not watching Lilo.
No. I, I, I was not gonna do that.
(09:54):
I've heard it's not. So Emma went in, fully unaware
she thought she was saying. We we were like driving there
and she's like. What are we like?
What are we saying? And I started.
I was. Like, I was seeing the horror
movie and she's like, oh, what'swhat's it called?
And I was like, it's called, it's called a horror movie.
Yeah. I couldn't remember it.
At the time, remember the name she's.
Like, oh, that's such a funny joke, we must be watching you.
Must be joking. And didn't realise until we got
(10:18):
into the theatre and the openingsequence is just like fucking
harrowing, the most harrowing like VHS tape stuff.
And then like the title comes like.
Like. Just horrific.
And she's like, we're not, we'renot watching Lilo and Stitch,
are we? I was like, no, so I'm not.
Where's Lilo? No, this is it.
No, this is it. This is what really went
(10:40):
different with the live action This.
Is what happens when you make a live.
Action A Lilo and Stitch horror movie would go kind of crazy.
It's just an alien that just wreaks havoc, Yeah, kills
everybody. Yeah, poor Emma.
So. No, but it was good.
Good movies, good, horrific. It really, it was like there's a
few scenes in it that are like so confronting.
(11:02):
It is. It's worth a watch.
It's really, really good. But it's pretty gory and it is
some like pretty serious themes,but it's really, really good.
Yeah, Yeah. I think it's like on par with.
Talk, Talk to me. I really like Talk to Me.
I thought Talk to Me is so good.Did I tell you that story?
We watched Talk to Me with all my mates.
I was like, oh, we're going to watch Talk to Me, really like.
And they're like, yeah, they'll watch it, watch that.
And then one of my mates fell asleep.
(11:24):
Yeah. I'm so sad I didn't record it
because I reckon it would have went crazy.
He was asleep and he was like asleep on his bed with his arm
out like this, like over the bed, like he's in it.
And I walked in and I grabbed his hand and went and like said
don't talk to me. And he woke up and he went what
the hell? Oh, that's so fucked up.
It was so funny. And after I'm like, I wish I
(11:44):
recall I was. So that happened.
I didn't. Just made that up.
Just made that just. Slipped into his hand and just
scared. I didn't like this one.
Talk to me, anyone. That would have been so peak at
the time as well. Oh my God.
I'm like, actually, sorry, so I didn't record it because it was
so funny. Well, it didn't happen.
It didn't. Happen.
If you didn't record it, it did not happen, yeah.
(12:06):
Oh, Wizards, race the rudder, race the sails.
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(13:09):
C Club for details. So this is a new segment, but an
old segment, okay, if that makesany sense.
So. That's an old segment where I
come from. So, okay, it's top five, it's
(13:29):
top five lists. We've been doing it Last two
episodes. Yep, 3 episodes.
Last three episodes, yeah. Beaten the hell out of this this
idea. Well, you I'll tell you what,
it's bloody, Yeah. We'll get into it.
We'll get into it later on. So this is top five best places
in video games to get a beer. Oh, OK.
Yeah. In no particular order.
(13:50):
All right, hit me, Hit me with number. 1A gun #1 the League of
Legends. Stay with me, OK?
What? Which lane?
Which? Which lane Are we gonna be
drinking beer? In the steps of Summoners Rift,
specifically Blue side, where you're sitting on the steps and
you've got the shopkeeper next to you and you're looking out
(14:13):
over the Nexus and the towels are there and the Nexus is like
making cool noises and then you hear go minions spawn and you're
like sitting there just having abeer.
Watching the minions. Watching the minions go out and
then you're like, all right, grab my door and Blade head down
midline. Let's go.
You know what I mean? You've just you've just sunk
couple beers. You've got the shopkeeper right
there. Potions.
I need a health potion. I've drank too many beers.
(14:33):
Give me a health potion. That's pretty good.
Well, I need my swiftness. Beer.
I think it was Swiftness. You don't want to drinking Swift
coming out of the bass drunk as like.
Cartoon sound effects every timeyou go to run.
But yeah, so that's my #1. OK.
And next week I'll make the list, OK?
It's just 'cause I was playing. I've been playing a lot of
league lately. Imagine drinking a beer while
(14:55):
doing this. Sorry, nerdy legally is like my
number one. You just know the list is sorry
shit #2 World of Warcraft. Oh my God, that's not good #2
Skyrim, OK, in the arch mage quarters in front of the fire,
just after you've spent a long day dungeoning and teaching
(15:17):
classes. Yeah, that fire that's there
with like all the plants behind it and stuff.
It would smell like fragrant too.
There's that many, like plants and.
Stuff, yeah, it'd be like smellsa little bit bad, but like some
places would smell really good. Yeah, you've got the alchemy
bubbling. Fungus growing in there.
There's a little. Now that I think about it, a lot
of mushrooms just naturally growing up there.
(15:38):
Fuck man, Arch Major would stinklike shit all the time if that's
where. He's nice.
Oh, maybe. He'd be like the the wizard
from. Of Ratagast, Ratagast, Lord of
the Rings. He'd have mushrooms growing off
the side of them arch major window hole like that's.
Good #3 I haven't played this but I feel like you would
(15:59):
probably have an area in this game.
OK, OK #3 Cyberpunk. Oh side punk 2070. 7 I feel like
side punk would have a cool place to have a beer I.
Love that you're like top five best place to have a beer.
Never played the game, never played the game, but you might.
You might not do you. Want to finish this it?
Looks like it'd be a cool place to have a beer.
I think there's a lot of places that would be cool to have a
(16:21):
beer. The the main bar, the Afterlife
would be pretty cool to have a beer in is a bar.
So it's like saying the the bestplace to have a beer is the bar
is the place that serves beer. Well #4 World of Warcraft, any
Tavern, Anita Evan in World of Warcraft, or I guess on the
(16:42):
steps of a of a place with a Nexus.
I was thinking like you, this list would be like oh like
avatar the like Far cry the gamelike the tree that you can climb
like. Overlook the forest.
The summer's Rift 1 was like that I guess.
And then I got Breath of the Wild as #5 #5 is Breath of the
Wild. And I was saying like on top of
(17:03):
those like towers that like openthe map, just having a beer up
on one of them. Well, I actually haven't played
Breath of the Wild. I was trying to visualize it but
it's like some crazy as you. Link and like Zelda, Yeah,
they're like making out or something, I don't know.
I think they're the same person.Well, they I can't remember.
Oh yeah, that would be pretty tight.
That would be pretty tight. So there's a there's a good spot
(17:24):
in Cyberpunk actually, that you can like overlook.
It's in the anime. Where you like to watch the
Rockets take off? That would be kind of cool to
have a beer in. On the moon, yeah.
Like the moon and that, yeah. Be good place to just cry.
On the moon while. You watch Cyberpunk the anime
and just cry. All that's good so.
Yeah, I mean, not bad. Not bad.
(17:44):
Not happy with that top five. I think I should've got a bit
more top. 5. Well, I'm just saying my top
five. Definitely five places you could
have, yeah, I guess. I wouldn't say they're the.
Top five Someone's roughly sick,I think.
Top five? Probably.
What have you got? Resident Evil 7 in the
Hillbillies. House.
Probably. There's probably a good place to
have a beer. I don't know if there's like
(18:06):
places in video games that I like because a lot of video
games are pretty fucking scary. Yeah, yeah.
So I'm like what place would be would be good?
Elden Ring? Yeah, at the top of the herd
tree. Looking down.
Looking down that seems. Scary.
Over the Kingdom. I reckon there's a peaceful
place in Elden Ring like underground like with the like
(18:27):
that Night city would be cool. Oh, yeah, OK, I.
Remember the name of a beer? That'd be cool.
A lot of places in Elden Ring would be sick.
That actually would be really cool.
Yeah, there's a lot, yeah. Top five Elden Ring locations.
Maybe just do a beer, yeah. Next week, next week segment.
I'll let you get onto that one. I'm going to.
Have to play it now. Oh my God, we'll have to play
out, Yeah. That's good.
(18:48):
I like that. Yeah, that's the next top five.
Maybe I need to go more game instead of just doing like an
old top five. You know, it's a new segment.
It's an old but new segment. Like I said, we're still
learning. It's an old segment.
It's. A new segment top five places in
Simon's Ref on Legal Agents map.This steps that's one they're on
blue side. Steps 500 meters.
(19:08):
Oh, give me a minute. I've got them all.
Blue side steps, red side, red side steps.
OK, that's two. You probably do jungle.
You'll probably do top line looking down the river.
Yeah, you'd feet in the river. OK, you got Baron next to you.
Yeah. And then bot lane your feet in
the river you got dragon next toyou so.
What's the next segment? And then we could probably do
mid. Are we?
(19:29):
What's the next segment? Creatures criticism.
This week on Creatures Criticism, we're doing a little
bit of a spin on it. This week we're gonna be reading
out some comments that we've been getting on our tick tocks
and shorts, and some of them arequite they're they're giving us
(19:53):
some criticism. Some creatures are criticisms.
It's crazy having. Yeah, we talked about at the
start of last part how how harsheveryone's been on our shorts
and going after our. Some people just just do not
know how to either like conceptualize what a joke is but
also they get so blinded by wanting to be right and telling
(20:16):
you you're an idiot even though like the video has nothing to do
with. It has nothing, we're just
taking the piss anyway. Yep.
OK, so this first comment, you guess what video this is from?
This first comment is by. I'm not even going to shout him
out. The comment states.
I can tell these guys have neverhang on.
I can tell these guys never played an RPG in their life.
(20:38):
Oak Flesh gives you armour. It's a buff, especially since
you're a mage sacrificing healthfor magic or mana.
Mage armour is needed so you cantake basic hits. 170 likes.
Whoa. 170 people agree with thatwith that comment.
Brother. Well, that's from our most
(20:58):
recent top five worst Skyrim spells.
Yeah. Where we joke about the spell
oak flesh. And turning you into a trade
turning. You in which it doesn't do no
but we're just riffing on how wefunny that would be if I.
Understand that oak flesh just makes your skin tough.
Like wood, Like oak? And I'm telling you, every
comment is like this man Every. Single comment, give us another
(21:20):
one from this video. OK, I'll try and guess which
video it's from. OK me when I have 3 hours played
on. Skyrim not come on bro.
OK, it this guy's just spelling it.
It makes your skin hard as oak not actually turn into wood.
Yeah, I've played the. I know, I know, but it.
(21:43):
Doesn't turn you into a tray. They've clearly never played the
game. Novice difficulty players.
That one hurts. That one really does hurt.
Man I was on survival man fuck you bro I was eating mushrooms
and that shit. Yeah, it's so it's actually,
it's every comment is like, that's crazy.
Just saying yeah for. Not understanding that it's a
(22:03):
joke. We're clearly taking the piss.
Yeah, here we go. Have you tried hitting a tree
with a sword? Shoot it with an arrow, even an
axe? The tool is designed for cutting
trees. Has to hit it repeatedly
10/20/30 times before it finallyfalls.
A tree stands proud, it succumbsonly to the mightiest forces.
It wouldn't do much against a dragon, but put a person against
(22:24):
a proud oak. What?
Whoa. The oak will take the will take
his blows and only fall after ittakes his hubris down with him.
For you. For you see, nature is anything
but weak. Whoa, he's not wrong.
So we were just talking about. That's an hilarious.
(22:45):
Spell oak flesh. Yeah.
So I I commented, I replied to this and I said, hey, guys, so
this is actually a joke. You can tell because we're
laughing at each other the wholetime.
We're fully aware the spell doesn't actually turn you into a
tree, but just imagine how funnythat would be.
If you guys need any more jokes explained to you in further
detail, just shoot us the DNA. Appreciate that.
(23:10):
That's good. Yeah, so that's just one video.
Yeah. We've done a few top fives now
and everybody is not. Having weighing in, give me
another top five. Well now I have to find another
one. This next comment from another
video you can tell bro clearly hasn't used them.
(23:30):
They aren't just armor, they allprovide different buffs.
Pretty sure boots give you speedalso. role-playing aspect.
Honestly, have either of you even played the?
Game. Wow, that's definitely top five
worst Oblivion spells, yeah. Talking about.
Conjuring and. Conjuring boots again.
Actually insane. It's.
(23:50):
Made me sad to. Even to even comment and joke
about a game I feel like you have to have some understanding
of like it's. Fake.
Yeah, we we have to take it to know that you can just summon
gauntlets or just summon boots. People were like in the comments
were like, you can actually put all the spells together and
summon of it's like, yeah, I understand that, but we're not
talking about like putting spells together.
(24:12):
We're literally talking about the worst spell.
It's so good. On its own, conjuring gauntlets
sucks. Yeah, yeah, People are funny.
People are funny. I think.
I think. I think just.
That's like someone like buying a bike and being like, man, like
fucking riding a bike can be pretty hard.
And they're like, well, actuallyriding a bike is not a superior.
(24:34):
Have you ever heard of a car? You know, you can actually
drive? Yeah, buying a bike is actually
supposed to be hard. A lot of people use it for
exercise. And then going into like full
detail about like, well, bikes aren't supposed to be easy.
If you buy a geared bike, a geared bike is actually made for
people that that need a little bit more power.
What's? His name Neil Armstrong took
(24:54):
drugs to drive be able to ride abike.
Neil Armstrong Lance Lance LanceLance Armstrong actually has to
take drugs to ride a bike quick.Lance Armstrong needs to take
drugs. It's obviously not supposed to
be easy. You know he lost his.
Testicle The bike was made in 19with the Big Wheel.
The right man. All right, Yeah.
Wait, You know, have you noticedwe're actually also dressed up?
(25:16):
Or just lose. Wizards, we're taking the piss.
Sorry to break the it's so good.It's Oh my God.
People just take it so seriously.
It's really funny to read for sure.
Yeah, people get really angry. Maybe that's our fault.
Maybe we should preface every joke that we make by saying it.
It is a joke. Yeah, that's a good idea
actually. Yeah, maybe we should leave in
(25:36):
every comment now, like when we post a clip.
Explain. Just explain.
A whole joke. Hey guys, so this is actually a
joke. We're fully aware that the steps
of Scott, we're fully aware the steps of someone's roof might
not be the best place to ever been.
Actually, you can't drink beer in the summoner's.
Ribs physically can't even go toSummoner.
'S ribs. So this is actually a null and
void point to make. That I find best place in the
(25:58):
right they have made like. That actually wouldn't be fun at
all, because there would actually be an enemy trying to
attack the bar at all times. Think about that.
And yeah, yeah. And and the Nexus turret would
actually shoot you 'cause you'reso close.
Yeah, the fountain turret. Would one shut you up?
Shut the fuck up, holy shit. Oh, legal ledge.
(26:21):
If someone, I'm not even gonna beat anyone, not even gonna
entertain the idea the. Nexus turret.
The Nexus turret would suck my balls actually.
So. Fuck the Nexus turret, I'm
drinking beers on those steps, Idon't give a fuck drinking.
Beers on top of the Nexus turret.
Whoa. While it shoots at people?
While it shoots at. People while it shoots at every
person that comments on. That Oh, wow, yeah.
(26:46):
In a game, in a video, in Minecraft, in Minecraft.
Minecraft. A good place to get a beer.
Oh well. Yeah, I don't know where you'd
build your own house. Just build a bar in Minecraft
and get a beer. Well, this is sick.
Specifically world with. #70. 4/8/93.
Actually the snow Biome would have the best beer because it
keep it cold in the winter. This is actually incorrect.
(27:07):
You cannot make beer in Minecraft.
If you were to drink beer in Minecraft, it would be no longer
a kids game. Rated E for everyone and Mojang,
by wanting to make sure it can appeal to the most people
possible, does not want to introduce something as crude and
profane as. Alcohol as alcohol as alcohol.
No alcohol was originally made. Goblet of Fire, It's James and
(27:34):
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at.linkedin.com/results Terms and conditions apply Go Rolls.
Goblet of five prompts. You pull a prompt from the hat.
You pull a pump from the goblet.Read it out and then we talk
about it. How?
Did you put a a gobble of fire prompt?
Little gobble of fire prompts. That's where we say that every
time we did it. Did you put a prompt in the
(28:59):
goblin file? No, Sir, I guess so.
Did you put a depressing prompt in the goblin?
File. So basically we get a prompt and
then we talk about anyway you'llyou'll get it.
What's the prompt? We I've got to make some new
prompts. They're all so profound and
like, what have you created thatyou're proud of?
What's the most? What's the what?
What have I should have? I should have.
(29:20):
What have you created that you're proud of?
What's like but like the top onethe most?
What have I created that I'm proud of?
That you're most proud of? Yeah.
I mean, probably just my YouTubechannel just in general.
I mean, I'm gonna think that's the most proud thing I've done
in terms of videos. I still really like the caving
video I did because it really, it brought me out of my comfort
(29:41):
zone. I went fucking.
Caving, which is just. I never would have done that if.
It wasn't for a YouTube video. Yeah, that's cool.
And it was A and the, the whole I did like I opted for all the
worst things that you could do in The Cave 'cause he'd like
give you options like, oh, this is the easy way, this is the
hard way. And I did all the hard things
for the video too. Like on purpose.
(30:02):
I was like, fuck, I gotta do thehard thing 'cause it's for the
video. It did the push myself.
Did the devil's anus? Yeah, dude, they always called
something. Like, felt like I nearly fucking
drowned in one of them. Like it was, yeah, it was
intense. Called the killer, yeah.
So I'm most proud of that. Or like the Minecraft series, I
suppose. Yeah, Minecraft.
Series great. But yeah, I think I just
(30:24):
checked, I think I tallied it up161 million views.
Just on YouTube. I mean, you've got a billion
views now. Yeah.
Yeah, that's crazy. I saw that post.
You know that's crazy. Yeah, I just reached a billion
views on YouTube all together. That's mental.
Yeah. Yeah, what about?
What about you, man? Most thing I'm proud of.
I'm proud of our friendship. What I created.
(30:46):
Yeah. Single handedly.
OK. It was tough.
Yeah, well, it was tough to force myself upon this
friendship. And I kept saying no.
Don't a friendship assaulted you?
I don't. Want to be friends with you man,
but you just keep showing up andstuff.
And I was like, I guess don't you just shut up my house one
day? Now I'm dressed as a wizard and
we've got a podcast together. Yeah.
Who's laughing now? Man, I think I was proud.
(31:10):
I really like this podcast. I feel like I've put a lot of
effort into it. And I feel like it's not that,
like, you didn't help me create it, but it's like, been like a
little baby of mine. Yeah.
And I've been really enjoying doing it.
Yeah, probably this podcast in the thing.
Yeah, I mean, you've, you've come up with most of the
segments and you're always the guy that brings the structure to
it, so. Yeah, and we're still learning.
(31:32):
It's fun to keep exploring it and making it better.
And yeah, we have like ideas forit's cool and bouncing ideas.
That's like the big thing too. Yeah, for sure.
Anyway. Next prompt is what's your
favorite joke? Probably where I joke about oak
flesh the spell and and just howfunny it would be if you cast it
and then you turn to a train. That's a really good one.
(31:52):
Like people broke into your house and like tried to rob.
You while you were turning into a train.
That's that's really funny. Don't give me wrong.
That's a really great drive. Yeah, but I don't want to be
that guy. But technically in the game you
actually don't turn into a. Tree.
Yeah, No, that's actually a goodpoint.
I don't. Want to see a joke?
Yeah, I'm sorry. I don't want to say I.
Don't even know why I said that.My favorite joke is is where I
(32:14):
just explain exactly what a spell is and why it's actually.
Really good. My favorite joke is when people
hate comment on people's like, Ithink that's hilarious.
It's funny, what's these are I got to change these problems.
They get like too broken out. What is What is this the thing
you are most sad of in your lifethat you regret the most?
What's your biggest regret? Well, it just says trauma.
(32:36):
Question mark trauma. If you could, if you could take
back your first heartbreak, would you?
What small insignificant thing gives you joy?
Is there something in your life that you're like, oh, I'm so
glad I do that. When I get to do it, I've got
mine. I'll, I'll say mine.
OK. I really like make the breakfast
that I've got going on right nowand making this, I put like
(32:59):
cottage cheese, avocado on toast, egg fried like, and make
it and I really a bit of lemon squeeze on top.
Now it's like seasonal bagel seed.
Like make it a really nice, likeway to start the day.
Yeah. I find I find I really enjoy
that. And then I try and savor it but
I eat too quick and just destroyit in like half a second.
I mean that ritual routine's really.
Good. Yeah.
(33:19):
So I've been doing that, which is really nice.
That brings me a bit of joy. Something that I do fuck, this
is odd, it is tough. Something that isn't
insignificant, but something that does bring me joy's every
morning waking. Up.
With just waking up, Oh my God. I made the other night.
I go to sleep every night thinking I'm never gonna wake
up. Waking up and having Frank next
(33:41):
to me, yeah. And then Frank, I say good
morning to him and he wakes up and then he climbs on.
Top of me and then we have. Like a little cuddle together
every morning. It's kind of like he like we get
up together, like him, him and Ilike it's always like he's like,
all right, let's get up and I'm like, all right, let's go, come
on. Then we like cuddle and then we
(34:02):
go and then we start our morning.
It's always such a good way to start.
Every morning, that's nice. And then Emma wakes up in her
doggy bed because. Frank's kicked around.
In the bed. And then he's like Emma, go sit,
sit before I feed her breakfast.You want you want your coffee
Sid shake. Sometimes it's really funny to
like if, if we're like eating stuff like Emma and I and
(34:24):
Frank's like begging for it, It's really funny to like get
Frank to like sit and shake and then feed it to him and then get
Emma to do the same and Frank's like.
What the? Fuck is going on here I.
Swear, I swear I saw her go to the carpet and get food out by
herself. I didn't know she had to do
tricks as well, Emma. I'm like shake.
Emma's just sitting there, so angry.
(34:45):
Yeah, I'm like, yeah, Frank, that's right.
Everyone has to do it. Everyone has to do.
It's a good way to teach him. You know, that's so funny.
How important is a wizard's hat to a wizard?
Not that important because I keep not wearing it.
You know, I would say it's pretty important, but you never.
Wear I never. Wear it, never wear the hat.
Yeah, literally wearing it todaythough.
And I never put my the hood up. I mean, I'm wearing a beanie
(35:08):
today because you were wearing the hat.
And I was like, oh, maybe I should wear a hat.
Kind of. It was either this or a cowboy.
Hat. No, just is that the other
beanie? Yeah, yeah, not that important.
I would say. Gandalf doesn't really wear his.
Unless you're like pulling rabbits out or impressing Oh
yeah, they're only good for revealing.
Things. Yeah, good for storage.
Sometimes I put my. Staff in the hat and I put on
that like, I don't know. Yeah, that's true.
(35:28):
They're good for storage. Yeah, Yeah.
They're not bad. They don't give you that much of
A buff city, I would say no, they don't give you much of A
buff. It's more of you.
It's more, yeah. Do you do his?
Here's another prompt. Yeah.
Another prompt. What the hell just happened?
I thank God this. My morning ritual is just making
sure I don't have an aneurysm every morning.
Actually, do you have a wizard apprentice?
(35:51):
Yeah, we do. We murdered him.
Yeah, we did have. One.
Well, you murdered him actually,as a prank.
Pretty funny though. Yeah, it was funny.
I mean, he didn't say it. Can't they?
I mean, hey, look, you know, if if YouTube starts paying us more
and the podcast starts making money, maybe we'll get another.
Apprentice. Yeah, yeah.
I'll be down for that. Right now we're just strictly
(36:12):
magical interns. I like to think the listeners
are all our present apprentices.We're like so true grand
Wizards. Oh.
Wow. Kind of like a head of like,
like I'd say a cult. I'd say it's.
Kind of like a cult. Grand Wizards.
Cults part of a clan. Clan, yeah, clan's probably a
better one. I'd say, I'd say we're, we're
(36:32):
simply fully qualified with yeah, yeah.
I'd say everyone's our apprentice.
Like we've got inquiries, peoplesend us in, feel free.
It's really. Funny actually, because I was we
were talking about the the robe situation today and we're like
man, like we're both wearing black robes.
Like we need like more colourfulrobes.
And I'm not even the two coloursI suggested was maybe one of us
is like in a white robe and the other ones in like a purple
(36:54):
robe. Just thinking then, yeah, I just
put two and two together probably.
Probably not good. Colours we should stay.
Away from, I agree. Yeah, yeah.
I've just been looking up Grand Wizard.
Outfit Oh, this one looks good. Well, the hood covers your whole
face. That's awesome.
It's so pointed. Yeah, so probably.
Not yeah, not not true. Yeah, yeah, we've.
(37:16):
Got a lot of people in the Souththat.
Listen to our podcast, Wizards to our Fans.
We're they're talking about video games for.
Another one join this clan. Yeah, talk more about Assassin's
Creed Shadows. No.
Man, yeah. Wrong.
Podcast. I hate how Snape.
Talk about Snape. Man, talk about Snape in the
(37:36):
caustic. Yeah, that's my tower.
Oh. No.
What are we talking? We've turned this into a bad
pod. All right, what?
Who cut these out? Dude, just let them.
Let them you know. All right, what mythical
creature would you want as a pet?
Oh, that's a good question. Frank's a bit of a mythical
gracious on dance. He can be.
(37:57):
I reckon something that you can that's a pet but also like is
useful. Yeah, like a dragon.
Like a dragon that you can ride.That'd be kind of Griffin.
A Griffin would be cool. Yeah, or just like, just like a
like a phoenix would be cool. I feel like Dumbledore just had
it just made with that. Yeah, Phoenix.
Yeah, he'll tears heel. Although there's never an expiry
(38:19):
date on it, which could be exhausting.
You're like, fuck, this Phoenix is gonna be around forever.
Yeah, this is a big responsibility.
It's like when people buy they're turtles and they don't
realize they live hundreds of years and they keep growing
like, oh look, we got a penny, turtle.
It's like it's not going to be apenny.
No, you do know that, right? Like it will be a giant
tortoise. It lives for a long.
Time. That's a good point.
That's why they actually banned them in the Uki think now.
(38:41):
Because they just lived for so long.
There was just so many people buying them, thinking they're
cute, not realizing they live like 100 years and it's like a
family responsibility. I had a turtle.
Do you want me to tell a really messed up turtle story?
I can tell it's pretty funny. All right.
I want to probably trigger warnings involves involves.
Involves a turtle. Involves a turtle and death.
OK, so I had this long neck turtle I found on my
(39:03):
grandmother's backyard when she was moving house, and I was so
excited. My oh, my turtle's my favorite
animal. Yeah.
Ninja Turtles loved it. You know what I mean?
I could not believe it. This is like I was like 8.
This is the hype of my Ninja Turtles craving.
I found a turtle. Oh, God.
Is it universe? Do you want it or something?
To turn into a ninja. Turtle, yeah.
Yeah, radioactive waste. I put it in the microwave.
Now I get my old Leonardo. Microwaves are way too active.
(39:26):
If I put a turtle in the microwave in 20.
Minutes or not that I wasn't that dumb, but I was like, Oh my
God, I got this turtle. And then dad was like, OK, And
then he made like a pond for theturtle.
Yeah. And then the pond got really
like, murky and grain. I was like, dude, Dad, we've got
to get a pump. He's like, no, I'll just keep
changing the water. And it just kept getting grain
and just wouldn't do it. I was 8.
Like, I wasn't taking care of this turtle.
Yeah. And he fed it cat food because
(39:46):
he was like, because he couldn'tbe fucked.
You know, what turtles ate so wecan.
And then he would eat the cat food and it would, like, seem to
be enjoying it. Yeah.
And I was like, oh, say he likesthe cat food.
And I'm like, come on, like, this is my pet.
Like, yeah. Can we show a bit more love?
Anyway, there's one day all the family was around for, like,
someone's birthday. And then everyone's like, oh,
can we see the turtle? Can we see the turtle?
Like all the kids, you know, four or five, you know, yeah.
That's like, yeah, no worries. He, like, rolls up his sleeve to
(40:08):
get through this murky green bullshit water.
Yeah. He goes, oh, yeah, got him,
pulls him out. And he's literally just hanging
out of his shell. Oh.
And all in front of all my nephews and little cousins and
stuff. And I'm just like, it was so
fun. My God.
And dad's like, oh, he's just sleeping.
He's straight back in the water.OK.
We saw the turtle moving on. Oh.
(40:31):
Let's go see our Let's go see our cat's grave now.
What happened? I guess he just dad just didn't
feed him or he just like the water.
Wouldn't it was fun. That's I was so sad.
Yeah, that was brutal. I know.
Poor turtle. We literally Yeah.
Should have left him. God damn I think they eat like
you can buy like bloodworm cubesor something.
There's like a just give it lettuce or something like
(40:52):
fucking cat food, dry cat food. You just throw it in the water
and be like, yeah, be right. Oh man, yeah, that's.
Not I don't wanna help my dad asbeing, but I just he just yeah.
No, he killed. No, he killed that.
He killed that turtle. He did.
We should we should call the RSPCA on him right now, 20 years
in advance. Yeah, anyway, God, that's.
Horrible. Anyway, double it.
(41:13):
A5. Prompts bro brings it down.
Oh my God, they're deep, deep traumatic moment parents have
ever done to a turtle. To a turtle that wasn't really.
I feel like this one you didn't copy and paste.
Really wanted to tell that story.
How do I learn magic? I can join our apprentice
college for 995 a month. Yeah, we actually have a course
if you want to buy. Just join.
(41:33):
You got to actually. That's how you learn, Yeah.
Subscribing to this YouTube channel.
That is how you learn. That's how you learn, yeah.
It just happens and if it doesn't work, unsubscribe and
then. Resubscribe or if it doesn't
work, make a new YouTube account.
Oh yeah, subscribe with that one'cause sometimes the first one,
the magic doesn't get through. So then you.
Yeah. Make sure you hit the.
Bell icon. The bell icon's really important
(41:53):
too. And then you've also I just got
to play out live podcasts on loop.
I'd go to sleep listening to thepodcast so the IT gets in like
click on the playlist, just let it play through, repeat.
I reckon maybe like at least 500,000 times.
Probably. Probably, at least, yeah.
And then you sort of, then you'll start to feel a bit of
(42:14):
magic. Going on, yeah.
And don't skip the ads. That's super important as well,
actually. Click on them, click on the ads,
Yeah. Click on the ads, yeah.
And buy the product. Buy the buy the product through
the link. I think that's how it works.
Yeah, yeah. Well, that's all the time we
have on the Wizards Tower. If you'd like to reach the
Wizards, you can send her now tothe Wizards Tower pod@gmail.com
(42:35):
and you can also follow us on Instagram and TikTok, whatever
the hell that is. Anyway, don't forget to grab
your hat, grab your star, and we'll see you on the next
episode of the Wizards Tower. With the Planet Fitness Black
(42:59):
Card you can bring a friend anytime and so much more when
you join today. You heard that right, Conquer
the stair climber with your partner and climb.
Enjoy a post workout recovery session in the hydro massage and
do it all again with access to any of our 2700 convenient
locations. So you coming get all the perks
with the PF Black Card for $1.00down and 2499 a month?
(43:24):
Offer ends June 13th. See club for details.
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