March 20, 2025 • 11 mins
The Leadership Cycle: Building Trust, Relationships, and Influence for Effective Leadership
Episode Summary
Discover how trust, relationships, and influence form a powerful cycle that drives leadership success. In this episode, Colby Morris unpacks John Maxwell’s quote, “Leadership is influence,” and introduces the leadership cycle: trust builds relationships, and relationships earn influence. With actionable tools and real-world examples, you’ll learn how to motivate your team and lead effectively.
What You’ll Learn
- Proven leadership strategies to spark team motivation.
- How to build trust and earn influence with team motivation techniques.
- Why generic leadership fails—and how to use custom leadership approaches.
- The leadership cycle: trust → relationships → influence.
Key Takeaways
- Motivation is Personal: Use leadership tools like asking great questions to unlock your team’s drive.
- Influence is Earned: Adapt to your team’s needs and explain the ‘why’ to gain trust.
- Customize Your Leadership: Tailor your style for maximum impact on each team member.
Real Stories, Real Impact
- Jordan’s Turnaround: A drifting employee becomes a leader when Colby taps into his need for mastery.
- Sarah’s Data Win: A skeptical analyst buys into a system after a numbers-based pitch.
- Mike’s Comeback: A top performer rebounds when given room to own his process.
Leadership Moves (Try One This Week!)
- Tool #1: Ask a team member, “What drives you?”
- Tool #2: Tweak your approach to match someone’s style.
- Tool #3: Ask, “Does my leadership work for you?”
Why It Matters
Leadership isn’t a title—it’s action. This episode gives you practical leadership strategies to build trust, strengthen relationships, and earn influence for real results.
FAQ: Leadership Cycle Explained
- What is the leadership cycle?
It’s the process where trust builds relationships, and relationships earn influence—the core of effective leadership. - How does trust impact leadership?
Trust is the foundation. Without it, relationships weaken, and influence disappears.
Connect with Colby
- LinkedIn: Colby Morris
- https://www.linkedin.com/in/colbymorris/
- Website: nxtstepadvisors.com (N-X-T, no E)
- Want Colby to speak or coach? Hit him up on LinkedIn or the website.
Challenge
Try one tool this week. Did it build trust or boost influence? Share your story in the comments or on LinkedIn with Colby.
Subscribe & Share
Loved this? Subscribe and share it with a leader who needs it. Let’s move leadership forward!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to Things Leaders Do, the podcast that
uncovers the secrets of becomingan extraordinary leader.
If you're a leader who'sconstantly seeking growth,
inspiration and tangible ways tolevel up your leadership, then
you've come to the right place.
Remember, the world needsexceptional leaders, and that
leader is you.
Now here's your host, colbyMorris is you.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Now here's your host, colby Morris.
Hello leaders, and welcome backto the TLD Podcast.
I'm Colby Morris and leadershipisn't about titles, it's about
actions.
I've led from the trenches tothe top and I'm here with
practical, no BS tools you canuse today.
I want to start today with atruth bomb from John Maxwell.
(00:48):
He says leadership is influence.
But here's the catch it's not afreebie.
You don't get to just walk inand lead.
There's a cycle to earning it.
You don't get to lead me untilI have a relationship with you,
and I don't have a relationshipwith you until I trust you and
(01:16):
trust well, that's thefoundation everything's built on
.
Influence flows fromrelationships and relationships
grow from trust.
Miss that and, believe me,you're stuck.
So today we're unpacking threetools to master this cycle.
Tools to motivate your team,influence them right and lead
them how they need it.
(01:37):
Does that make sense?
Every step builds trust, itstrengthens relationships and it
earns you the influence to leadlike a champ.
So let's dive in.
Tool number one motivation ispersonal.
You got to find their drive.
See, motivation isn't one sizefits all.
(01:59):
It's personal, like a customplaylist, your job.
You got to crack their code,because if you don't know what
fires them up.
You're not leading, you'reguessing, and guessing doesn't
cut it in the trust department.
So here's how to unlock it.
First, ask real questions hey,what's the best part of your gig
(02:23):
?
What's the best part of yourjob?
What makes you feel unstoppable?
Those answers will be yourroadmap.
And then kind of watch theirvibes.
When do they perk up?
What tasks do they really own?
See, that's their spark.
And then three you need to knowtheir currency.
Some people want props inpublic, some people that would
(02:48):
kill them inside.
Others crave autonomy.
Some need to see the impactthey're making.
If you can match it, that'swhere trust kicks in.
Jordan was a solid performer Ihad, but checked out coasting.
(03:08):
I tried the usual, you know,more praise, pat on the back
crickets.
So I sat him down and I askedhey, what drives you?
He looked at me and just saidmastery, mastery, I want to
dominate in what I do.
That was it.
So we put him on revamping ourclient onboarding process.
(03:33):
That was a mess of a projectthat was eating up time and it
was frustrating everyone.
He turned it into a streamlinedmachine.
He cut onboarding time by 30%.
Six months later, he's not justowning his role, he's leading
initiatives and training others.
That trust is what turned itaround.
(03:58):
Here's how it ties to the cycle.
When you figure out whatmotivates someone, you show them
that you get them.
That's what builds trust.
Trust fuels the relationship,and a strong relationship.
Well, that's your ticket toinfluence.
Step one of the cycle, locked inyour leadership move.
(04:21):
I want you to book a one-on-onethis week with whatever your
direct report is and say, hey,what drives you?
And then I want you to listen,like really listen.
All right.
Tool.
Number two influence is earned,not assumed.
Look, a title gets you a desk,maybe a parking spot, but not
(04:45):
influence.
Okay, that's earned throughactions, not assumed with a
handshake.
And the cycle says it startswith trust.
Without it, your, your words,just bounce off.
Here's how you earn it.
You have to adapt to them.
Data nerd bring stats, teamplayer, stats, team player show
(05:16):
the group win, meet them wherethey're at.
Two sell the why.
If you say, do this, that'sweak.
Here's why it matters to us.
That's what sticks Purpose,trumps, commands.
And then three give first.
Give first.
Influence isn't a grab, it's agive and take.
If you invest in them, they'lllean in.
(05:40):
Here's the story.
Sarah was our, what I call ourdata queen.
She was sharp, skeptical andnot here for the fluff.
We were rolling out a newperformance tracking system and
without her buy-in the teamwould have pushed back hard my
usual big vision pitch.
That was a total flop.
She wasn't buying it.
(06:01):
She wasn't buying the hype.
So I switched gears.
I brought her the numbers howit'd save time, boost accuracy,
make her job easier.
She looked at the data and saidnow we're talking, but why
didn't you lead with this?
She didn't just get on board,she became the system's biggest
(06:21):
advocate.
She helped the whole team adoptit smoothly.
That influence clicked when Ispoke her language.
Why is that tied to the cycle?
Well, adapting and explainingthe why shows you respect them.
That builds trust.
Trust deepens the relationshipand from there your influence
(06:43):
grows.
Cycle two nailed.
Here's your leadership move.
I want you to pick someonewho's been resisting you, tweak
your pitch to their style andsee what shifts.
All right.
Tool number three customizeyour relationship.
(07:04):
I'm sorry, your leadershipapproach.
Customize your leadershipapproach.
Generic leadership that is foramateurs.
You've got to lead people howthey need it, not how you like
it.
But they won't let you and theywon't let you in unless they
trust you and that you see themfor real.
(07:26):
Trust is what opens that door.
Here's how to nail it.
Number one learn their wiring.
Okay, do a disc, test aMyers-Briggs or just simply pay
attention.
What do they need from you?
And then two tailor it.
(07:46):
Some want structure, othersthey need space.
Some they love check-ins,others not so much.
You have to fit the glove.
And then three stay current.
People evolve.
(08:06):
This one is hard for leaders,but at some point you have to
ask hey, how can I lead youbetter?
Right, you just kind of cringea little bit inside, but a real
leader needs to know this andwants to know this.
You have to keep it fresh.
(08:28):
I had a top performer we'll callhim Mike who just started
slipping.
He was leading our biggestclient account.
There were high stakes, tightdeadlines, but the pressure was
crushing him.
I thought he was burned out, soI hovered, checking in
constantly.
(08:48):
That was a bad move.
He snapped I need room to runthis my way, okay, okay.
So I backed off.
I gave him space.
I trusted his process.
He not only met the deadline,but blew the client away with
extra deliverables.
They didn't even ask for thatlesson.
(09:12):
You have to customize or crash.
How does that tie to the cycle?
Well, if you're tailoring yourstyle, that proves you've tuned
into them.
That builds trust.
Trust strengthens therelationship.
Are you seeing this cycle?
And a solid relationship handsyou influence.
(09:33):
The cycle would then becomplete.
So here's your leadership movefor this week.
Ask one person hey, does mystyle work for you?
And then shut up and listen.
You need to know.
So what's next?
(09:55):
I want you to pick one toolOkay, motivation, influence,
customization and just test itthis week.
Okay, leadership's a cycle.
Trust builds relationships.
Relationships earn influence.
Okay, leadership's a cycle.
(10:15):
Trust builds relationships.
Relationships earn influence.
Okay, these tools power thatcycle.
If you start with trust, therest is going to follow.
Hey, if this lit you up, I'mhere for more.
I speak, I run workshops andcoach leaders to dominate in
real time.
You can hit me up on LinkedInor check nextstepadvisorscom.
(10:38):
That's N-X-T, no E.
Let's make leadership thatmoves, that changes.
If you love this, subscribe,share it with a leader who needs
it and tell me how you'reowning this trust game.
Subscribe, share it with aleader who needs it and tell me
how you're owning this trustgame Until next time.
Lead with trust, lead withinfluence, and you know why.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Because those are the things that leaders do.
Thank you for listening toThings Leaders Do.
If you're looking for more tipson how to be a better leader,
be sure to subscribe to thepodcast and listen to next
week's episode.
Until next time, keep workingon being a better leader by
doing the things that leaders do.
Welcome to Things Leaders Do, the podcast that
uncovers the secrets of becomingan extraordinary leader.
If you're a leader who'sconstantly seeking growth,
inspiration and tangible ways tolevel up your leadership, then
you've come to the right place.
Remember, the world needsexceptional leaders, and that
leader is you.
Now here's your host, colbyMorris is you.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Now here's your host, colby Morris.
Hello leaders, and welcome backto the TLD Podcast.
I'm Colby Morris and leadershipisn't about titles, it's about
actions.
I've led from the trenches tothe top and I'm here with
practical, no BS tools you canuse today.
I want to start today with atruth bomb from John Maxwell.
(00:48):
He says leadership is influence.
But here's the catch it's not afreebie.
You don't get to just walk inand lead.
There's a cycle to earning it.
You don't get to lead me untilI have a relationship with you,
and I don't have a relationshipwith you until I trust you and
(01:16):
trust well, that's thefoundation everything's built on
.
Influence flows fromrelationships and relationships
grow from trust.
Miss that and, believe me,you're stuck.
So today we're unpacking threetools to master this cycle.
Tools to motivate your team,influence them right and lead
them how they need it.
(01:37):
Does that make sense?
Every step builds trust, itstrengthens relationships and it
earns you the influence to leadlike a champ.
So let's dive in.
Tool number one motivation ispersonal.
You got to find their drive.
See, motivation isn't one sizefits all.
(01:59):
It's personal, like a customplaylist, your job.
You got to crack their code,because if you don't know what
fires them up.
You're not leading, you'reguessing, and guessing doesn't
cut it in the trust department.
So here's how to unlock it.
First, ask real questions hey,what's the best part of your gig
(02:23):
?
What's the best part of yourjob?
What makes you feel unstoppable?
Those answers will be yourroadmap.
And then kind of watch theirvibes.
When do they perk up?
What tasks do they really own?
See, that's their spark.
And then three you need to knowtheir currency.
Some people want props inpublic, some people that would
(02:48):
kill them inside.
Others crave autonomy.
Some need to see the impactthey're making.
If you can match it, that'swhere trust kicks in.
Jordan was a solid performer Ihad, but checked out coasting.
(03:08):
I tried the usual, you know,more praise, pat on the back
crickets.
So I sat him down and I askedhey, what drives you?
He looked at me and just saidmastery, mastery, I want to
dominate in what I do.
That was it.
So we put him on revamping ourclient onboarding process.
(03:33):
That was a mess of a projectthat was eating up time and it
was frustrating everyone.
He turned it into a streamlinedmachine.
He cut onboarding time by 30%.
Six months later, he's not justowning his role, he's leading
initiatives and training others.
That trust is what turned itaround.
(03:58):
Here's how it ties to the cycle.
When you figure out whatmotivates someone, you show them
that you get them.
That's what builds trust.
Trust fuels the relationship,and a strong relationship.
Well, that's your ticket toinfluence.
Step one of the cycle, locked inyour leadership move.
(04:21):
I want you to book a one-on-onethis week with whatever your
direct report is and say, hey,what drives you?
And then I want you to listen,like really listen.
All right.
Tool.
Number two influence is earned,not assumed.
Look, a title gets you a desk,maybe a parking spot, but not
(04:45):
influence.
Okay, that's earned throughactions, not assumed with a
handshake.
And the cycle says it startswith trust.
Without it, your, your words,just bounce off.
Here's how you earn it.
You have to adapt to them.
Data nerd bring stats, teamplayer, stats, team player show
(05:16):
the group win, meet them wherethey're at.
Two sell the why.
If you say, do this, that'sweak.
Here's why it matters to us.
That's what sticks Purpose,trumps, commands.
And then three give first.
Give first.
Influence isn't a grab, it's agive and take.
If you invest in them, they'lllean in.
(05:40):
Here's the story.
Sarah was our, what I call ourdata queen.
She was sharp, skeptical andnot here for the fluff.
We were rolling out a newperformance tracking system and
without her buy-in the teamwould have pushed back hard my
usual big vision pitch.
That was a total flop.
She wasn't buying it.
(06:01):
She wasn't buying the hype.
So I switched gears.
I brought her the numbers howit'd save time, boost accuracy,
make her job easier.
She looked at the data and saidnow we're talking, but why
didn't you lead with this?
She didn't just get on board,she became the system's biggest
(06:21):
advocate.
She helped the whole team adoptit smoothly.
That influence clicked when Ispoke her language.
Why is that tied to the cycle?
Well, adapting and explainingthe why shows you respect them.
That builds trust.
Trust deepens the relationshipand from there your influence
(06:43):
grows.
Cycle two nailed.
Here's your leadership move.
I want you to pick someonewho's been resisting you, tweak
your pitch to their style andsee what shifts.
All right.
Tool number three customizeyour relationship.
(07:04):
I'm sorry, your leadershipapproach.
Customize your leadershipapproach.
Generic leadership that is foramateurs.
You've got to lead people howthey need it, not how you like
it.
But they won't let you and theywon't let you in unless they
trust you and that you see themfor real.
(07:26):
Trust is what opens that door.
Here's how to nail it.
Number one learn their wiring.
Okay, do a disc, test aMyers-Briggs or just simply pay
attention.
What do they need from you?
And then two tailor it.
(07:46):
Some want structure, othersthey need space.
Some they love check-ins,others not so much.
You have to fit the glove.
And then three stay current.
People evolve.
(08:06):
This one is hard for leaders,but at some point you have to
ask hey, how can I lead youbetter?
Right, you just kind of cringea little bit inside, but a real
leader needs to know this andwants to know this.
You have to keep it fresh.
(08:28):
I had a top performer we'll callhim Mike who just started
slipping.
He was leading our biggestclient account.
There were high stakes, tightdeadlines, but the pressure was
crushing him.
I thought he was burned out, soI hovered, checking in
constantly.
(08:48):
That was a bad move.
He snapped I need room to runthis my way, okay, okay.
So I backed off.
I gave him space.
I trusted his process.
He not only met the deadline,but blew the client away with
extra deliverables.
They didn't even ask for thatlesson.
(09:12):
You have to customize or crash.
How does that tie to the cycle?
Well, if you're tailoring yourstyle, that proves you've tuned
into them.
That builds trust.
Trust strengthens therelationship.
Are you seeing this cycle?
And a solid relationship handsyou influence.
(09:33):
The cycle would then becomplete.
So here's your leadership movefor this week.
Ask one person hey, does mystyle work for you?
And then shut up and listen.
You need to know.
So what's next?
(09:55):
I want you to pick one toolOkay, motivation, influence,
customization and just test itthis week.
Okay, leadership's a cycle.
Trust builds relationships.
Relationships earn influence.
Okay, leadership's a cycle.
(10:15):
Trust builds relationships.
Relationships earn influence.
Okay, these tools power thatcycle.
If you start with trust, therest is going to follow.
Hey, if this lit you up, I'mhere for more.
I speak, I run workshops andcoach leaders to dominate in
real time.
You can hit me up on LinkedInor check nextstepadvisorscom.
(10:38):
That's N-X-T, no E.
Let's make leadership thatmoves, that changes.
If you love this, subscribe,share it with a leader who needs
it and tell me how you'reowning this trust game.
Subscribe, share it with aleader who needs it and tell me
how you're owning this trustgame Until next time.
Lead with trust, lead withinfluence, and you know why.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Because those are the things that leaders do.
Thank you for listening toThings Leaders Do.
If you're looking for more tipson how to be a better leader,
be sure to subscribe to thepodcast and listen to next
week's episode.
Until next time, keep workingon being a better leader by
doing the things that leaders do.
Popular Podcasts
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
The Breakfast Club
The World's Most Dangerous Morning Show, The Breakfast Club, With DJ Envy And Charlamagne Tha God!
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.