Why Diets Fail and What Actually Works: (Part 1)-The Psychology of Diet Failure: Why Willpower Isn’t the Problem

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Breaking free from the cycle of diet failure requires understanding what's really happening behind the scenes in your brain and body. Coach Adam Kelley launches a powerful four-part series that completely reframes how we think about sustainable health transformation.

The truth about willpower might surprise you - it's not an unlimited resource you can simply tap into with more motivation. Psychological research reveals willpower functions like a battery that depletes throughout the day, creating what scientists call "decision fatigue." This explains why you might eat perfectly all day but raid the pantry at 9 PM. Rather than a character flaw, it's your brain's natural energy conservation system at work.

Even more damaging is the restriction-binge cycle that most diets inadvertently create. When you constantly deprive yourself, your brain becomes fixated on forbidden foods (the "forbidden fruit effect"), setting up a behavioral and emotional loop that's nearly impossible to break through discipline alone. Each time the cycle repeats, it chips away at your confidence, creating deep-seated shame that research shows actually predicts worse eating behaviors, not better ones.

The breakthrough comes when you shift from punishment to strategy, from restriction to skill-building. Studies show that self-compassion after dietary lapses leads to quicker recovery and better long-term outcomes than self-criticism. This is precisely why effective coaching starts with mindset, habits and systems - because when you build your foundation right, the food takes care of itself.

Ready to break free from diet culture for good with expert guidance and a strategy that honors your unique biology? Visit transformedhealthcoach.com and click apply to see if the THI Rebuild program is right for you. Remember, real success comes from daily consistent actions, not perfect days.

Show Study References:

1. Baumeister, R. F., et al. (1998). Ego depletion: Is the active self a limited resource? Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
   
   
   
2. Polivy, J., & Herman, C. P. (1985). Dieting and binge eating: A causal analysis. American Psychologist.
   
   
   
3. Kristeller, J. L., & Wolever, R. Q. (2010). Mindfulness-based eating awareness training for treating binge eating disorder: The conceptual foundation. Appetite, 55(2), 319–324.
   
   
   

    4. Adams, C. E., et al. (2012). Self-compassion and eating behavior: The role of emotional eating and psychological distress. Appetite, 59(3), 777–784.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to the Win On Purpose podcast, where we break
down the noise, myths andconfusion in the health world so
you can build a body and a lifethat thrives with purpose.
I'm your host, coach Adam Kelly, and today kicks off a brand
new four-part series called whyDiets Fail and what Actually
Works.
This series is for anyone who'sever tried diet after diet,
only to end up frustrated, tiredand right back where they

(00:23):
started, or even worse.
Today, in part one, we'retalking about the psychological
side of diet failure, somethingmost coaches and programs
completely overlook.
If you've ever told yourself Ijust need to be more disciplined
or I always sabotage myself,this episode will show you why
that's not true and why.
Willpower was never the problemin the first place.
Alright, we'll see you on theother side was never the problem

(00:44):
in the first place, all rightwe'll see you on the other side.

Speaker 2 (00:45):
Welcome to the Win On Purpose podcast.
From health and fitness,business, personal development,
relationships and more, wepromise you will find
inspiration to help you win onpurpose in all areas of your
life journey.
Now for your host, adam Kelly.

Speaker 1 (01:02):
What's going on everybody?
Welcome back to the Win OnPurpose podcast with Coach Adam
Kelly, hosted by THI TransformedHealth Initiative.
That is our coaching system,our coaching service that we
provide for people like us whoare tired of the same cycles and
the same repetitive yo-yoingdiet back and forth and are

(01:22):
ready to solve their healthproblems once and for all.
So this is a new series thatwe're doing.
Okay, so, four part series.
It's called why diet spell andwhat actually works.
So you guys are going to lovethis because I promise you this
is going to answer so manyquestions that you have.
We're going to see that, thatyou're not broken, that you are
not confused, that you're notthe problem.

(01:42):
But sometimes our thinking andwhat we've been told to believe
is truly the problem, and we aregoing to crush that on this
series.
So I'm so glad you guys arelistening and taking part and
this is going to be a great one,guys.
So let's get right into it.
We are discussing in today'spart one.
The actual title of this episodeis the Psychology of Diet
Failure why willpower isn't theproblem.

(02:04):
Okay, so most diets are builton one idea right, restrict
harder, try harder and whiteknuckle your way to be
successful.
But here's the realityWillpower is a limited resource.
Just like a battery, it drainsthroughout the day.
When you rely on willpower tomake every food decision, fight
every craving and ignore everytemptation, you're setting

(02:26):
yourself up to fail.
Psychologists call thisdecision fatigue.
All right, guys, this is a realthing.
It's why you might do good allday, but then raid the pantry at
9 pm when your brain isexhausted.
This problem isn't weakness,it's how the brain conserves
energy.
In fact, we have a study herein 1998, and I can't pronounce
the person's name, so I'm goingto spell it for you

(02:55):
B-A-U-M-E-I-S-T-E-R.
They showed that willpowerbehaves like a muscle.
It can be depleted with overuse, especially under stress or
emotional strain.
Okay, and once your willpowerruns out, that's when old habits
take over, which brings us toone of the biggest psychological
traps in dieting therestriction binge cycle.
So the yo-yo dieting andrestriction binge cycle.

(03:15):
Let me paint a familiar picturefor you.
You start a new plan, you'recommitted, you're following the
rules, and then you slip.
One off-plan meal turns into abinge, and that binge turns into
guilt.
That guilt leads to morerestriction the next day, and
the cycle just repeats andrepeats itself.
This is called yo-yo dieting,and it's a behavioral and
emotional loop, not just a foodissue.

(03:37):
When you constantly depriveyourself, your brain starts
obsessing over the very foodsyou're trying to avoid.
This is called the forbiddenfruit effect.
It's not a lack of control,it's your mind rebelling against
rigid structure.
All right.
So Pallavi and Herman in 1985demonstrated that restrained
eaters I, you know, for example,dieters were more likely to

(03:59):
overeat after breaking theirdiet compared to non-dieters.
Why?
Because one deviation felt likefailure, and that sense of
failure doesn't just stay withyour behavior.
It starts to shape how you seeyourself.
That's the next psychologicallayer of damage.
Shame, hey guys, real quick.
Sorry to interrupt the episode,but I have a little question
for you.
What if this was the last timeyou ever had to start over?

(04:20):
The THI Rebuild is an elite90-day transformation experience
built for high-performing menand women in their 40s and 50s
who are done with the crashdiets, the quick fixes and
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.
This isn't a meal plan and afew workouts.
This is a total rebuild of yourenergy, your strength, your
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(04:43):
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take it over.
We combine high-level strategywith personal support, so you
never have to guess again.
Our clients don't just loseweight, they become
unrecognizable to the version ofthemselves that once settled
for trying and when you're readyto stop trying and start
transforming, here's what you doGo to transformhealthcoachcom,

(05:09):
click apply and tell us whyyou're ready.
Spots are limited, guys, and weonly accept those who are
actually ready for seriouschange, because this time it's
not about trying harder, it'sabout doing it differently.
This is the THI rebuild, and itcould be the last program you
ever need.
All right back to the episode.
So how?
Diet culture fuels guilt andshame.
Diet culture sells the illusionof quick success, but it rarely
delivers a long-term sense ofinadequacy.

(05:33):
Every time a diet fails, themessage isn't this plan wasn't
sustainable.
It's you didn't try hard enough, you didn't want it bad enough,
you weren't committed enough.
That's the beginning of theshame loop, where every failed
attempt chips away at yourconfidence and you start to
believe that you are the problem.
Research from Kessler andWoliver in 2010.

(05:56):
Sorry, guys, I butcher names ifyou haven't noticed yet, so
forgive me.
Every study I'm ever going toquote on this podcast.
You're going to find in thereview notes it's going to be in
the commentary so you canreference it and look it up
yourself but this was in 2010.
They showed that guilt andshame around food choices
predict worse eating behaviors,not better ones.
Shame disconnects you from yourbody.

(06:16):
It fuels emotional eating,secrecy and self-sabotage and
that's the big one, guysself-sabotage.
So if diets fail, bothphysically and emotionally, how
do we break out of the cycle?
It starts by shifting ourentire framework from punishment
to strategy.
The missing pieceself-compassion plus behavior
strategy.
So here's the pivot point, guys.

(06:38):
Lasting change doesn't happenthrough restriction.
It happens through skillbuilding and self-compassion.
Instead of asking why can't Ifix it, ask what's making it
hard for me to be consistent.
Instead of thinking I failed,think what can I learn from this
moment?
In fact, a study published inAppetite in 2012 found that
people who practiceself-compassion after dietary

(06:59):
lapses were more likely torecover quickly and resume
healthy behaviors than those whocriticize themselves.
So beating yourself up is notthe way.
This is exactly why ourcoaching at THI doesn't start
around macros and meal plans.
It starts with mindset, habitsand systems, because when you
build your foundation right, thefood just takes care of itself.

(07:20):
So let's take all of this andput it into real world action.
Here are some takeaways thatyou can apply immediately, so
practical takeaways.
Here's what I want you to walkaway with today, all right.
Number one willpower isunreliable.
We want to build systems, notjust intentions, okay.
Number two restriction createsobsession.
Flexible structure createsfreedom.

(07:43):
Number three you are not afailure.
The system that you're tryingto operate under is okay.
Number four self-compassionleads to consistency.
Shame leads to sabotage.
And number five real successcomes from daily reps, not
perfect days.
Start asking yourself can I seemyself doing this in a year

(08:03):
from now?
If the answer is no, it'sprobably not the right plan for
you.
All right, so next time we'llmove from the mental to the
physical what actually happensto your body when you diet and
why it often makes fat lossharder over time.
But first let's go ahead andwrap this thing up, all right?
So I appreciate you, as always,for tuning in to the first

(08:24):
episode of this series in theWin On Purpose podcast.
All right, this series is justgetting started and we're going
to keep building, layer uponlayer, to help you break free
from diet culture for good.
If you are ready to rebuild yourhabits, your body and your
confidence from the ground up,with expert guidance and a
strategy that honors yourbiology, the THI rebuild might

(08:45):
be exactly what you need.
Just go visittransformedhealthcoachcom, click
apply now and fill out a shortform to see if you're a good fit
.
We'll review your goals andreach out personally.
If you qualify, yes, you willhear from me personally.
And remember today do somethinggood for your health, something
good for yourself, somethinggood for those you care about
and, whatever you do, make sureyou win on purpose.

(09:08):
Talk at you next time.