How To Survive The Classroom

How To Survive The Classroom

As we all know, an educator’s career is one of prestige, respect, and authority. Just kidding. Sure, there are lesson plans and inspirational posters. Book reports and detentions. But nobody tells you it’s also parents brawling in the parking lot, students unleashing live crickets during finals, and getting evaluated for “running a tight ship” while the ceiling literally leaks onto your head. Hosted by Andrea Forcum (aka @Educator Andrea on TikTok, former high school teacher and current professor at Indiana State University), How to Survive the Classroom is part advice column, part survival guide, and part group therapy. Each week, Andrea dons her trauma tiara to tackle call-ins and confessions from fellow educators (and brave educator allies). From hilarious war stories to brutal burnout moments, join us as we strategize, survive, and occasionally let out a good old-fashioned cathartic scream into the void. If you’ve ever Googled “how to professionally quit mid-semester” or seriously considered hiding in a supply closet, this show’s for you. Teaching may be a noble profession… but nobility doesn’t stop your classroom from catching on fire.

Episodes

July 28, 2025 38 mins
This week’s episode swings wildly between "please tell me that didn’t just come out of my mouth" and "how is this legal in schools?" First, we’ve got a teacher who meant to say “stop jacking around” and... well, you can guess how that went. I lose it (obviously), because every teacher has had one of those moments where your brain short-circuits in front of 30 teenagers. Then, we flip the tone completely for a story that rocked me...
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I started this episode already on edge because a mysterious chip in my windshield had me spiraling into a full-blown Safelite conspiracy. And if you think that was wild, just wait until you hear what one of your fellow teacher besties found smeared under a student’s desk. (Spoiler: it’s exactly what you’re afraid it is.) Then there’s the student who decided to learn about vasectomies during class. Yes, there’s a YouTube video invo...
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This week I went full trash-TV-to-education-policy mode after Kourtney Kardashian called public school “dated” and bragged about homeschool like she invented it. And y’all… I have thoughts. We’re talking 1% privilege, educational history, and why calling schools outdated is actually the most outdated take of all. Then we pivot—hard—to some iconic voicemail chaos, including the loudest poop story I’ve ever heard and a kid who appar...
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This voicemail had me fully sweating. A teacher casually drops that a full SWAT team showed up at her school… and the kicker? It wasn’t even a drill. We’re talking lockdowns, military gear, weapons drawn, and a group of students who were just trying to get to lunch. And the reason they showed up? Ohhhh, you are not ready. I spiral through the possibilities, ask all the wrong questions, and react in real-time to what is possibly th...
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I was feeling proud after successfully replacing an exterior light… until I dropped a screw into the mulch and my son roasted my bald husband mid-chaos. Classic. But that’s not even the wildest thing in this episode. I’m talking pencil-related injuries, fourth graders defending their moms’ honor in extremely unexpected ways, and the dark, dark rabbit hole of what ER staff have had to remove from people's bodies. (Spoiler: birds. Li...
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Let’s just say this episode covers a lot of... ground. From one very misplaced turd to a student-inspired staple surgery, I walk you through what can only be described as a masterclass in middle school madness. We’re talking scorched Chromebooks, poop-related investigations, and yes, whether you stand or sit to wipe (it matters more than you think). I’ll also drop a killer free resource that could save your last month of school. So...
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You ever discover something about your teacher that made your teenage brain short-circuit? Yeah, me too. So this week, I dove headfirst into the teacher lore rabbit hole, because nothing says professional development like finding out your music teacher once chucked a desk at a kid. Oh, and remember the DARE program? Apparently, not everyone took it as seriously as I did. We’re also unpacking some jaw-dropping listener voicemails, ...
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This week, I had a full-circle moment as a burnt-out teacher turned soccer mom… and then immediately pivoted to unpacking a story where a fourth grader threw up peace signs and declared his love for a very adult body part during writing time. You know—balance. We’re talking about teachers surviving without running water (again), why I physically can’t handle fairs (also again), and what to actually do when a student says somethin...
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June 2, 2025 44 mins
It’s Episode 50, and honestly… what better way to celebrate than with a voicemail about a student who threatened to poop on a teacher’s desk? This week, I’m unpacking end-of-year exhaustion (May energy is real and it’s violent), plus the wildest school stories you sent in—including kids confessing their sex lives mid-English class and throwing Pop-Tarts in rage. We’re also talking about failing infrastructure, disappearing school ...
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This week, I’m talking to literal Grammy-nominated musical legend John Ondrasik—aka Five for Fighting—about education, mentorship, Costco carts, and how he’s working to put real music teachers back in underfunded schools. (Also, I tried not to ugly cry while listening to “100 Years” on loop. Mostly succeeded.) But before we get there… we’ve got a classroom snake situation, an inappropriate dictionary moment, and a cooking class wh...
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May 19, 2025 36 mins
Teachers, you know it's gonna be a weird week when you're prepping comedy for a room full of principals—including ones you still have to work with. Am I nervous? Yes. Am I planning to open with “remember your why”? Also yes. Let chaos reign. This week, I’m sharing my behind-the-scenes prep for the wildest PD gig of my life… plus two fire-filled fan submissions, literally. One backpack goes up in smoke, and another student brings l...
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May 12, 2025 35 mins
The tornado didn’t get us, but this week’s episode might. After surviving Midwest storm warnings and Shrek-related trauma from a former student with a decade-long vendetta, I’m back with a full breakdown of things you can’t predict in teaching—like a kid gasping for air mid-presentation, or another casually announcing their itchy situation mid-kickball. We’re talking magic tricks that turn into emotional damage, AI that actually ...
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What do a lead-painted door, a rubberized body part in a middle school backpack, and the KKK showing up to a school in the ‘80s have in common? Absolutely nothing—except they’re all packed into this episode. Today, I’m kicking things off solo with chaotic home improvement updates (including which stripper works hardest) and a couple of voice memos from listeners that are… honestly, you just have to hear them to believe them. One w...
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So, we changed the name. Welcome to How To Survive the Classroom—you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be. In this kickoff to the new era, I’m diving into two of the most unhinged teacher submissions I’ve ever heard—one involving a movie mishap that will haunt you and another featuring a hallway hair war that somehow became my own personal reality TV show. Plus, I’m revealing the AI tool that actually doesn’t feel sketchy (teac...
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May 2, 2025 3 mins
We’re back! No, you’re not crazy — we’ve got a new title (How to Survive the Classroom) and a new mission in life. Thanks to your feedback (and my team’s deeply concerning need for gossip), we’re kicking off Season Two with a brand new twist: real call-ins, real confessions, and real chaos from educators everywhere. This season, we’re diving into your craziest war stories, burnout moments, impossible classroom situations, and all t...
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This is our Season 1 finale! Come reflect on the first year of podcasting with me, where I share my gratitude for this amazing journey so far and tease what's to come for Season 2. You can take the survey here: http://survey.podcasterandrea.com/ You can join the book club at https://www.patreon.com/thosewhocanread — Don’t be shy come say hi: andrea@human-content.com and podcasterandrea.com Watch on YouTube: @educatorandrea Lis...
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In this wild episode, Denver and I dive into our travel adventures filled with unexpected twists and valuable life lessons. From Denver’s dreamy yet disastrous trip to Australia—featuring koalas, chlamydia myths, and rental car struggles—to my questionable choices while backpacking through Europe, no stone is left unturned. Takeaways: Travel Builds Resilience: Whether it’s losing a passport in Spain or dealing with canceled fligh...
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January 23, 2025 65 mins
In this lively episode I talk with Denver Riley about everything from classroom humor to the challenges teachers face post-pandemic. We also reflect on the new administration's pick for Secretary of Education and the similarity it may be to the movie Idiocracy. Takeaways: Secretary of Education: Talking about did the new administration's pick for the job and how it may be too similar to an old movie. Grace and Accountability in B...
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January 17, 2025 64 mins
In this episode I talk with Jerry Kolber, the creative mind behind hit edutainment shows like Brain Games and Brainchild. With a background in reality TV and a passion for making learning interactive, Jerry shares how he transformed passive viewing experiences into engaging, educational content. We discuss everything from his early days producing Queer Eye for the Straight Guy to partnering with Pharrell Williams on a Netflix show ...
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In this episode Denver Riley and Lauren Antonio join me for a heartfelt and humorous discussion about teaching, empathy, and navigating unexpected challenges. From recounting chaotic airport experiences in Newark to exploring the emotional weight teachers carry in the classroom, we reflect on the importance of creating safe spaces for students. We also share anecdotes about students’ "trauma dumps," our strategies for fostering emo...
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