November 19, 2024 • 28 mins
Life isn’t just about reaching the destination—it’s about savoring every step along the way. In this episode, I share my reflections on the importance of embracing the journey, even when the path feels unclear or uncertain. From my own experiences of starting this podcast with humble beginnings to the lessons I’ve learned from life’s unexpected detours, we’re diving into the beauty of growth, gratitude, and finding meaning in everyday moments.
Together, we’ll explore:
How to find purpose in a world full of expectations and judgments: By leaning into vulnerability and authenticity, we uncover the power of living our truth.
The transformative power of the journey: Learn how small, seemingly mundane moments contribute to our growth and why they deserve to be celebrated.
Practical ways to cherish the present: Simple strategies to slow down, appreciate where you are, and find joy in progress, no matter how small.
This episode is your reminder that each step, even the ones that feel messy or uncertain, matters. Let’s commit to slowing down, savoring the moment, and uplifting each other as we navigate life’s waves.
If you’ve ever felt stuck chasing the “next big thing,” this episode is for you. Tune in, and let’s explore how to embrace the journey together.
🎧 Listen now and share this message with someone who might need a reminder that their journey matters.
#selfdevelopment #Wellness
#thym4teawithmikita #manifest #purposefulliving #liveunapplogectically #freedom #podcast #womeninpodcast #podcastlife #empoweringwomen
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
One of the biggest lessons I've learned is that the
journey teaches us things thatthe destination never could.
Every single struggle, everysmall win, every setback those
are the experiences that give usstrength.
They make you wiser, they makeyou more compassionate and more
grounded.
But you have to be willing tobe present with them, even when
(00:23):
they're uncomfortable orimperfect.
And I'm telling you becauseI've been there, I've been in
uncomfortable.
Hey, there, I'm Makita, a smalltown girl with big dreams who
started a podcast with an oldheadset and a laptop at my
kitchen table and made my dreamscome true.
On my podcast, time for Tea withMakita, we chat about living
(00:46):
life unapologetically, on yourterms, from career advice,
entrepreneurship, relationshipsand everything in between.
This is your one-stop shop forreal conversations and
inspiration.
If you're looking forconnection, then you found it
here.
Join me every Tuesday as wedive into those sometimes hard
(01:07):
to have conversations.
So grab your cup of tea orcoffee and get comfy, because
this is time for Tea with Makita, and the tea is definitely hot.
Ever feel like you need asuperpower boost of motivation
with exclusive tips and toolswith your goals in mind?
Well, say hello to your newinspiration hotspot the Tuesday
Tea Newsletter, your weeklyinfusion of big thinking energy
(01:29):
that'll propel you to chase yourwildest dreams and never shy
away from using the power ofyour voice.
Sign up for the Tuesday TeaNewsletter today at
beautifullyunbalancedcom andelevate your goals to the next
level.
Welcome back, it is definitelytime for some tea.
I am Makita and I just goals tothe next level.
Welcome back, it is definitelytime for some tea.
I am Akita and I just want tothank you so much for sharing
(01:49):
your time, your space and youramazing energy.
And you know, there's a reasonwhy I say thank you for sharing
your energy.
I say it each and every timebecause I am truly grateful and
I like to start each and everyepisode with gratitude.
I like to start my day withgratitude.
I don't know about you, but wehave so much sometimes to
(02:14):
complain about and be unhappyabout.
But when I start taking accountof my life and where I'm at and
you know, I just I feel so muchgratitude and I'm truly, I'm so
grateful that each and everyone of you are on this journey
with me.
(02:34):
It feels really good knowingthat you're not alone in the
journey.
You know what I mean.
Like we're all going throughlife and sometimes life gets
really hard.
Sometimes it gets messy,sometimes we're like I don't
even know what I'm doing, we'rejust in it.
And it feels good having aplace that you can show up to
(02:57):
each and every time, withsomeone who gets it, that knows
what it feels like to be whereyou're at, or you know, at least
can say I may not know exactlywhat you're going through, but I
know that feeling.
I definitely understand how itfeels to be feeling lost.
We all know what it feels liketo feel lost, like that feeling
(03:18):
of uncertainty, the feeling ofnot knowing what's gonna happen
next.
We've been there.
We know what that's like.
So when I say thank you forsharing your time and your space
, I truly mean thank you forshowing up with me and being on
that journey and allowing me tobe on your journey with you as
well.
So that's me just like showingmy gratitude to you guys.
(03:43):
You know, and one thing aboutbeing podcasting is that for me,
like having these moments ofvulnerability and just being so
open.
Sometimes it's really scary,because we know that a lot of
people like to judge us orexpect you to be a certain way
and when you show up as yourimperfectly self, with mistakes
(04:05):
and faults and everything is nothow people envisioned your life
to be.
It's kind of like you know,like oh, but at the same time,
you know, it's like if for me toshow up and say, hey, live this
life, live your life, live yourtruth and be unapologetic about
it.
Use your voice, own it.
(04:26):
Trust me, I am still working onowning my voice as well.
I'm working on, you know,continuing to live authentically
, to stand up for who I am,figure out what it is I want out
of this world and hold on tothat and not let it go All right
(04:46):
off my soapbox.
All right, so today's I'mrunning out of my card.
So my affirmation today is mylove is stronger than arguments
and fights.
Your ego will always try to winyou.
You are much more than your ego.
Your ego will always try to winyou.
(05:07):
You are much more than your ego.
Whenever you find yourself inan argument, ask yourself does
it really matter?
Is this worth giving away mypeace?
And honestly, I find myselfasking that question any and
every time I'm having, I feel acertain way and I want to like
say something.
I check myself because I haveto ask myself is this my ego or
(05:32):
is this really something worthfighting about?
Because if it's my ego, then Ineed to step back for a second.
So it's just a great remindersometimes that some things
aren't worth the fight, but thenthere's other things that are
definitely worth fighting forand using our voice for All
right.
Today's episode we're going todive into is.
I just read this amazing book.
(05:54):
Some of you have probablyalready read this book, so you
are probably like familiar andknow.
If you haven't read this book,it's definitely on one of my
best reads ever.
Especially if you're a personthat loves to think outside the
box and you know you're justfull of questions and not afraid
to ask the hard questions, thenthe Alchemist is definitely for
(06:19):
you.
So I read the book theAlchemist.
Um, so I read the book theAlchemist and it was such an
amazing journey because it'skept for me.
I felt like it was in the the,the person that was reading it.
It almost felt like someone wasreading me a book, because you
know, sometimes you get audiobooks and there's a lot to be
(06:43):
desired from the person that'snarrating.
But this guy was really, reallygood.
It read like a parable and Iwas on this journey as he was
reading this amazing book to meand I could just really absorb
myself in it.
But it's really all aboutfinding your purpose.
And this young man in the bookhad a dream that made him
(07:08):
realize that he was notfulfilling his purpose and in
order for him to truly live lifein the way that he was supposed
to, he needed to start livinghis truth.
He was looking for his personallegend and to me that
(07:29):
translated over to finding hispurpose in life.
So he's on this.
He goes, he needs to fulfillhis personal legend and while
he's on this journey he decidesto leave his country, go to
another country where he didn'teven speak the language, because
the need, the drive was so deepfor him to fill it.
(07:52):
And in thinking about this, Iwas, like you know, in life we
all have purpose.
I don't believe that anyone wasplaced here or given a dream or
thought or idea that it wasn'timplanted in them like a seed
waiting to be birthed.
We all have a purpose.
We all have, you know, our ownpersonal legend to fulfill.
(08:18):
And in this thing called life,things pop up Like life starts
happening and we get distracted,we get to a comfort level and
we're living pretty good.
I have everything I ever wanted, or more than I ever thought I
could have.
Shouldn't I just stop here andjust be grateful for what I have
(08:38):
?
But then there's always thisneed in us.
It's like no, you can't stophere, you have to keep going,
there is something more for you.
You haven't completed thejourney yet.
And that's how the book wasreading, like in each place he
could have stayed.
He could have just said youknow what?
I found the girl I love, I haveall the money that I could need
(09:03):
, and just let it go.
And I think sometimes when wethink about our destiny and our
purpose, because I'm a bigdreamer I don't know about you
guys, but I dream really, reallybig.
I never know how I'm going toget there, because when I'm
dreaming or thinking about allthe possibilities, I never think
(09:25):
about how, like what steps areneeded to get to the destination
.
I just know that if I trust it,everything's going to come
together and I will get there.
I may not get there the way Iwant to, but things will happen.
And I feel like the same foranyone.
Some people dream in detailswhere they can actually
(09:48):
physically see all the littlethings that need to happen and
they can really map that out.
And some people are like me,who just dream big and like, oh,
this is the end.
But the thing about that is weonly focus on the end.
We forget that it takes all thelittle pieces, all the little
(10:10):
things that we have to gothrough to absorb, all the
people that we have to meet onthe way, all the experiences
that we have to experience sothat when we get to the finish
line, we get to the purpose, weunderstand it a lot more,
(10:32):
because then we understand ourplace in life.
And I think the biggest thingis understanding that we are all
here for a purpose and we areall one.
You know, we all have differentdreams, different ideas, but
(10:54):
when you lead with love, whenyou lead with understanding,
then when you finally reach thatdestination, it makes the
journey so much moreunderstandable and you can
appreciate it a lot more too.
If you've ever your parents evertold you that if you wanted
something you had to work for,you want those new shoes, you
want that new outfit that you'regoing to have to get a job,
(11:15):
you're going to have to work forit and you may have got the job
to get the new shoes or thebike, whatever it is that you
wanted.
But when you finally got themoney that could afford you to
get the thing that you wanted,you realize that was something
else most of the time that youneeded, and a lot of times for
(11:36):
me, the thing that I thought Iwanted so badly.
When I finally have theopportunity to get it, to go
after it, it's not even what Iwant, because it's so much more
deeper than that.
And while I'm on the journey, Icome across so many different
(11:56):
people, so many different thingsthat make me realize that it
may have started off with mebeing able to want a new pair of
shoes or a new outfit, but itended with me understanding who
I was as a person, what I coulddo and the things that I could
(12:20):
accomplish, how smart I was, howcreative I was, you know, and
the same for you, you know, ifyou start thinking about all the
things, like a time when youwanted something really bad that
you had to go out and get ityourself, you know, when you
start thinking about that, like,okay, did you get it?
And if you did get it, did youfeel as complete as you thought
(12:43):
you would feel, because, see,that's what happens a lot of
times too, when I'm onlythinking of the big picture,
when I'm only seeing thedestination and not experiencing
the whole journey.
When I get there, it's a letdown, because I don't have the same
emotion.
It's like I thought I wouldfeel more excited.
(13:05):
I thought I would feel moreaccomplished.
I thought that, you know, Ifeel like I've done it and you
know, everything is just.
But no, I feel like it feelslike a letdown.
I don't feel anything at all.
You know, I just I feel likethe same way I felt before
everything ever.
You know, I just I feel likethe same way I felt before
everything, ever anythinghappened, and that's because I
(13:25):
didn't understand the journey.
I didn't appreciate the journey.
I never stopped to think aboutall the things that happened,
all the things that led up toletting me be where I'm at.
We put so much energy intoreaching milestones, the perfect
job, dream house, financialfreedom and what it is we think
(13:49):
about that we think will make usfeel complete.
I mean, don't get me wrong,goals are great.
All I'm asking is that, whilewe're working toward what we
want, that we're also focused onwhat's next and that we really
think about where we're at inthe journey.
Don't rush through it, pushingyourself to go faster, thinking
(14:10):
we'll find happiness when wefinally arrive, and then we
don't, or worse.
But if we get there and we lookback and realize we missed
everything that was happening,that was meant to teach us, to
shape us, right along the way,right along the journey, we miss
it.
(14:33):
Let's shift the perspective alittle bit.
Imagine if we started seeingeach step we take as meaningful,
valuable, even when it feelsmessy or uncertain.
And I'm going to tell you rightnow, I am not the person who
likes uncertainty.
I dream big and I want to seethe end result, because I
(14:54):
already want to know what'sgoing to happen.
The idea of not knowing what'sgoing to happen, it's like my
anxiety is through the roof.
What's going to happen?
It's like my anxiety is throughthe roof.
But you know, I talked to avery, very wise person who said
that sometimes you have to sitin silence.
You have to have obedience, andwhen you're being obedient,
(15:19):
you're trusting the process.
Obedient, you're trusting theprocess.
Think about it Some of our mostpowerful lessons come from
unplanned and unexpected partsof life, those detours, those
moments where we feel lost.
They're the ones that teach usresilience, patience and who we
really are and sometimes who wewant to be.
(15:40):
One of the biggest lessons I'velearned is that the journey
teaches us things that thedestination never could.
Every single struggle, everysmall win, every setback those
are the experiences that give usstrength.
They make you wiser, they makeyou more compassionate and more
(16:00):
grounded.
But you have to be willing tobe present with them, even when
they're uncomfortable orimperfect.
And I'm telling you becauseI've been there.
I've been in uncomfortablepositions.
You know I'm a Capricorn and Iknow people know Capricorns can
(16:22):
be very judgmental people.
But I experienced something inmy life that made me realize
that we are all going throughsomething, we are all battling
something, and you never knowwhere someone is at in their
journey, because sometimespeople are there when people are
down the most.
(16:42):
They're in the thick of theirjourney and they just need one
person to show them some smallcompassion, small understanding.
I don't have to have walked inyour shoes to show compassion,
so just think about that.
You know, the next time you seesomeone, that's you know.
(17:02):
We start to, when we start tosay something.
I don't know what they're goingthrough.
I don't know that person andthey don't know me, because I
know when I was going through mystruggle, oh my gosh, honey,
honey, honey.
But I came out of it a morecompassionate person, a better
(17:26):
person, someone who listensbefore they talk, a person who
appreciates other people more.
And I think sometimes weunderestimate the power of
everyday moments.
We're going to shift a littlebit here, okay, because I think
(17:47):
it's also important that we findvalue in everyday moments.
We get so caught up on waitingfor the big life-changing events
and I know I do Like I'm readyfor some change, I'm ready for
things to happen, I'm on thisgrind, I am ready, but you have
to find those moments, thosevaluable moments in everyday
(18:07):
things.
It could be conversations, youknow, connecting with people.
You know this.
Most recently I went with agroup of friends and we went to
the movies and I was going toback out of the trip I really
was, but I'm glad I didn't.
(18:28):
I was able to have some amazingconversation with some amazing
women.
That gave me a great newperspective, you know, made me
really start shifting in mythought process, like, okay, so
what's important, you know, evenwhen I'm in a moment of
stillness where I'm justbreathing and trying to take it
(18:49):
all in.
I often reflect on thoseconversations and I'm like, hmm,
how can that was meant for me.
Like the fact that I remember,out of everything that was said,
that one thing that this personsaid stuck with me.
Like the fact that I remember,out of everything that was said,
that one thing that this personsaid stuck with me means it was
(19:10):
meant for me.
Now I can be a little, I canoveranalyze a little bit, but
sometimes, you know, we don'thave to analyze it to death, but
just know that there's a storyin there for us.
It's a reminder in that for us.
You know, we may not understandit at the moment, but we'll
always come back to it.
(19:31):
I remember a couple of monthsago I said to someone I was like
you know, maybe you know I needto have a little bit more like
life experiences, you know,happen for me.
You know, I'm just maybe, ifyou know, something else
(19:54):
happened.
Maybe I could relate a littlebit more.
I don't know why I said that,but let me tell you after I said
it, life happened.
Life happened and they said becareful what you ask for.
And I got what I asked for, butI came out as a better person,
more resilient person, astronger person.
(20:15):
So just know, sometimes, whenwe're asking for something, you
may get it.
But remember, even if it'sfrustrating, even if the
experience seems like it's aboutto break, us find joy in it,
(20:36):
because there's always somethingto be thankful for.
Even in the midst of a strugglethere's something worth
appreciating.
Because even in the midst of astruggle, there's something
worth appreciating.
Because even in the midst of mydarkest days, I had something
to be thankful for.
Whether I was thankful that Iwas not alone, there was someone
I could call, I had my family,I had my mom, I had my husband.
(20:58):
You know, the sun still cameout.
Every day.
There was a lot to be thankfulfor.
I once heard someone say thatordinary moments are the ones
we'll miss the most, and thatreally struck me, because, when
you think about it, it's true.
Those little in-between momentsmake up most of our lives.
So why not treasure them now?
(21:20):
And I know I talk aboutembracing the journey and
looking at how we, you know,slow down a little bit and, even
if we can see the destination,to kind of focus on the journey
that we're going through at thesame time.
But I say that because I wantyou to start embracing the
(21:43):
journey instead of fixating onthe destination.
So here are some ways that Ifeel like has helped me stay
grounded, and sometimes wealways got to remind ourselves.
But, like I said as I startedoff, this whole conversation was
practicing gratitude, and notjust for big things, but for
small things.
(22:04):
Sometimes things seeminsignificant, and not just for
big things, but for small things.
Sometimes things seeminsignificant Maybe it's a cup
of tea, a moment of silence, thefact that you even got through
the day, especially if it was atough day Like huh, I made it
through the day.
I didn't have to tell nobodyabout themselves.
I was able to let my ego goLike, yes, I spoke up for the
(22:24):
things that mattered and thethings that I felt like you know
what they was not going tointerrupt my peace.
I was able to let it, just letit go, and for that I'm grateful
, because now I'm in a moment ofpeace.
I did not let anyone oranything steal the peace that I
have within me.
And I will tell you what.
(22:45):
I do that a lot and I remindpeople that a lot Do not let
someone else steal your peace.
When we notice and appreciatethese moments, we start seeing
the value in the journey itselfand then reflect on what you're
learning.
Take time to ask yourself whatam I learning?
(23:09):
Right now, even if you're goingthrough a hard season, there's
something to be learned.
Maybe it's patience, maybe it'show to be resilient, or maybe
it's just learning how to listenor slow down.
Reflection helps us see growthin real time instead of waiting
until we've reached the end tolook back and realize real time.
Instead of waiting until we'vereached the end to look back and
(23:31):
realize I've grown a lot.
I went through a lot.
When you're reflecting andseeing that you can be like man
look how far I've come From lastweek to this week.
I have grown so much.
Not saying there won't be dayswhere you may slip back into old
habits, but hey, that's life.
It's recognizing being able'relearning and that you are
growing into the person that youwant to be.
(24:13):
The next thing is find joy inthe progress, not just
perfection.
Don't look for perfection, I'mtelling you.
I try to live a beautifullyunbalanced life.
Another thing that's helped mewhen I'm talking about finding
joy in the process itself is tojust be myself, be transparent.
This is it Celebrate the factthat I'm moving forward and I'm
(24:35):
not perfect, but hey, I'm in myseason of healing.
This is what it looks like.
So, whatever small steps I'mtaking, this is my process.
So, whatever small steps I'mtaking, this is my process.
And it's going to lookdifferent from someone else's
process, because what they needand how they deal with things,
our backgrounds, our culture allof that is so different.
(24:55):
So, no, it's going to bedifferent.
No, I'm not perfect, but myjourney and how I'm processing
this is going to be perfect forme, same way it's going to be
perfect for you.
And remember progress is worthcelebrating.
(25:22):
And the last thing is let go ofcomparison.
Don't be comparing yourself tonobody else.
Comparison is the enemy of afeeling journey.
When you are constantly lookingat somebody else's life and
their accomplishments, we robourselves of our own experiences
.
Remember that your path isyours alone and it's just as
valuable as anyone else's.
I always say it's easy to lookthrough the window at somebody
(25:44):
else and think that they got itmade.
My mama always said you don'tnever know what's going on
behind closed doors.
You don't never know what thatperson is going through.
It looks good on the outside,but you can't see behind those
doors.
So don't let anyone lie.
(26:06):
Fool you that it looks good.
Everything that looks goodain't always good, and I'll tell
you, there was a time when Ithought my journey wasn't adding
up.
I've compared myself to others,wondering if I was doing
something wrong because I hadn'tgotten to where I thought I
should be.
(26:26):
But when I started, lookingback on everything I've been
through, every challenge, everyunexpected turn, I realized that
those experiences were buildingme into someone stronger,
someone who was learning totrust her step, someone who was
learning to trust herself, stepby step, and that's when it
(26:47):
clicked with me.
The journey is where we becomewho we're meant to be.
It's where we find our strengthand our purpose, your personal
legend.
So start embracing the processinstead of rushing through it.
It's great to see the end andmanifest that into reality, but
(27:09):
just remember that it's going totake lots of little steps along
the way, lots of lessons, lotsof resilience.
But if you focus on celebratingit, reflecting on it and having
gratitude, even on the dayswhere it feels like you're
standing still or stuck in somequicksand, you'll get there.
(27:31):
We all get there.
Our personal legends, ourpurpose, that little feeling
that won't let you go until youfulfill it.
If you're getting comfortable,it's time to get uncomfortable.
It's time to let life be alittle messy and enjoy the
journey.
(27:53):
So, as we wrap up today, I wantyou to take a moment to
appreciate where you are rightnow, not because it's perfect,
but because it's real, becauseit's a part of your story.
The journey isn't just a pathto something greater.
It's where life happens.
It's where growth happens.
(28:14):
So here's my challenge for youthis week Slow down, notice the
small moments and ask yourselfwhat am I learning today?
And remember that the journeyis worth savoring every single
step of the way.
All right, my friends, thankyou so much for spending your
time with me today.
(28:34):
If this episode has resonatedwith you, I'd love it if you
share it with someone who mightneed a reminder that their
journey matters too.
Let's keep uplifting each otheras we move forward step-by-step
.
Until next time, my friendnamaste.
One of the biggest lessons I've learned is that the
journey teaches us things thatthe destination never could.
Every single struggle, everysmall win, every setback those
are the experiences that give usstrength.
They make you wiser, they makeyou more compassionate and more
grounded.
But you have to be willing tobe present with them, even when
(00:23):
they're uncomfortable orimperfect.
And I'm telling you becauseI've been there, I've been in
uncomfortable.
Hey, there, I'm Makita, a smalltown girl with big dreams who
started a podcast with an oldheadset and a laptop at my
kitchen table and made my dreamscome true.
On my podcast, time for Tea withMakita, we chat about living
(00:46):
life unapologetically, on yourterms, from career advice,
entrepreneurship, relationshipsand everything in between.
This is your one-stop shop forreal conversations and
inspiration.
If you're looking forconnection, then you found it
here.
Join me every Tuesday as wedive into those sometimes hard
(01:07):
to have conversations.
So grab your cup of tea orcoffee and get comfy, because
this is time for Tea with Makita, and the tea is definitely hot.
Ever feel like you need asuperpower boost of motivation
with exclusive tips and toolswith your goals in mind?
Well, say hello to your newinspiration hotspot the Tuesday
Tea Newsletter, your weeklyinfusion of big thinking energy
(01:29):
that'll propel you to chase yourwildest dreams and never shy
away from using the power ofyour voice.
Sign up for the Tuesday TeaNewsletter today at
beautifullyunbalancedcom andelevate your goals to the next
level.
Welcome back, it is definitelytime for some tea.
I am Makita and I just goals tothe next level.
Welcome back, it is definitelytime for some tea.
I am Akita and I just want tothank you so much for sharing
(01:49):
your time, your space and youramazing energy.
And you know, there's a reasonwhy I say thank you for sharing
your energy.
I say it each and every timebecause I am truly grateful and
I like to start each and everyepisode with gratitude.
I like to start my day withgratitude.
I don't know about you, but wehave so much sometimes to
(02:14):
complain about and be unhappyabout.
But when I start taking accountof my life and where I'm at and
you know, I just I feel so muchgratitude and I'm truly, I'm so
grateful that each and everyone of you are on this journey
with me.
(02:34):
It feels really good knowingthat you're not alone in the
journey.
You know what I mean.
Like we're all going throughlife and sometimes life gets
really hard.
Sometimes it gets messy,sometimes we're like I don't
even know what I'm doing, we'rejust in it.
And it feels good having aplace that you can show up to
(02:57):
each and every time, withsomeone who gets it, that knows
what it feels like to be whereyou're at, or you know, at least
can say I may not know exactlywhat you're going through, but I
know that feeling.
I definitely understand how itfeels to be feeling lost.
We all know what it feels liketo feel lost, like that feeling
(03:18):
of uncertainty, the feeling ofnot knowing what's gonna happen
next.
We've been there.
We know what that's like.
So when I say thank you forsharing your time and your space
, I truly mean thank you forshowing up with me and being on
that journey and allowing me tobe on your journey with you as
well.
So that's me just like showingmy gratitude to you guys.
(03:43):
You know, and one thing aboutbeing podcasting is that for me,
like having these moments ofvulnerability and just being so
open.
Sometimes it's really scary,because we know that a lot of
people like to judge us orexpect you to be a certain way
and when you show up as yourimperfectly self, with mistakes
(04:05):
and faults and everything is nothow people envisioned your life
to be.
It's kind of like you know,like oh, but at the same time,
you know, it's like if for me toshow up and say, hey, live this
life, live your life, live yourtruth and be unapologetic about
it.
Use your voice, own it.
(04:26):
Trust me, I am still working onowning my voice as well.
I'm working on, you know,continuing to live authentically
, to stand up for who I am,figure out what it is I want out
of this world and hold on tothat and not let it go All right
(04:46):
off my soapbox.
All right, so today's I'mrunning out of my card.
So my affirmation today is mylove is stronger than arguments
and fights.
Your ego will always try to winyou.
You are much more than your ego.
Your ego will always try to winyou.
(05:07):
You are much more than your ego.
Whenever you find yourself inan argument, ask yourself does
it really matter?
Is this worth giving away mypeace?
And honestly, I find myselfasking that question any and
every time I'm having, I feel acertain way and I want to like
say something.
I check myself because I haveto ask myself is this my ego or
(05:32):
is this really something worthfighting about?
Because if it's my ego, then Ineed to step back for a second.
So it's just a great remindersometimes that some things
aren't worth the fight, but thenthere's other things that are
definitely worth fighting forand using our voice for All
right.
Today's episode we're going todive into is.
I just read this amazing book.
(05:54):
Some of you have probablyalready read this book, so you
are probably like familiar andknow.
If you haven't read this book,it's definitely on one of my
best reads ever.
Especially if you're a personthat loves to think outside the
box and you know you're justfull of questions and not afraid
to ask the hard questions, thenthe Alchemist is definitely for
(06:19):
you.
So I read the book theAlchemist.
Um, so I read the book theAlchemist and it was such an
amazing journey because it'skept for me.
I felt like it was in the the,the person that was reading it.
It almost felt like someone wasreading me a book, because you
know, sometimes you get audiobooks and there's a lot to be
(06:43):
desired from the person that'snarrating.
But this guy was really, reallygood.
It read like a parable and Iwas on this journey as he was
reading this amazing book to meand I could just really absorb
myself in it.
But it's really all aboutfinding your purpose.
And this young man in the bookhad a dream that made him
(07:08):
realize that he was notfulfilling his purpose and in
order for him to truly live lifein the way that he was supposed
to, he needed to start livinghis truth.
He was looking for his personallegend and to me that
(07:29):
translated over to finding hispurpose in life.
So he's on this.
He goes, he needs to fulfillhis personal legend and while
he's on this journey he decidesto leave his country, go to
another country where he didn'teven speak the language, because
the need, the drive was so deepfor him to fill it.
(07:52):
And in thinking about this, Iwas, like you know, in life we
all have purpose.
I don't believe that anyone wasplaced here or given a dream or
thought or idea that it wasn'timplanted in them like a seed
waiting to be birthed.
We all have a purpose.
We all have, you know, our ownpersonal legend to fulfill.
(08:18):
And in this thing called life,things pop up Like life starts
happening and we get distracted,we get to a comfort level and
we're living pretty good.
I have everything I ever wanted, or more than I ever thought I
could have.
Shouldn't I just stop here andjust be grateful for what I have
(08:38):
?
But then there's always thisneed in us.
It's like no, you can't stophere, you have to keep going,
there is something more for you.
You haven't completed thejourney yet.
And that's how the book wasreading, like in each place he
could have stayed.
He could have just said youknow what?
I found the girl I love, I haveall the money that I could need
(09:03):
, and just let it go.
And I think sometimes when wethink about our destiny and our
purpose, because I'm a bigdreamer I don't know about you
guys, but I dream really, reallybig.
I never know how I'm going toget there, because when I'm
dreaming or thinking about allthe possibilities, I never think
(09:25):
about how, like what steps areneeded to get to the destination
.
I just know that if I trust it,everything's going to come
together and I will get there.
I may not get there the way Iwant to, but things will happen.
And I feel like the same foranyone.
Some people dream in detailswhere they can actually
(09:48):
physically see all the littlethings that need to happen and
they can really map that out.
And some people are like me,who just dream big and like, oh,
this is the end.
But the thing about that is weonly focus on the end.
We forget that it takes all thelittle pieces, all the little
(10:10):
things that we have to gothrough to absorb, all the
people that we have to meet onthe way, all the experiences
that we have to experience sothat when we get to the finish
line, we get to the purpose, weunderstand it a lot more,
(10:32):
because then we understand ourplace in life.
And I think the biggest thingis understanding that we are all
here for a purpose and we areall one.
You know, we all have differentdreams, different ideas, but
(10:54):
when you lead with love, whenyou lead with understanding,
then when you finally reach thatdestination, it makes the
journey so much moreunderstandable and you can
appreciate it a lot more too.
If you've ever your parents evertold you that if you wanted
something you had to work for,you want those new shoes, you
want that new outfit that you'regoing to have to get a job,
(11:15):
you're going to have to work forit and you may have got the job
to get the new shoes or thebike, whatever it is that you
wanted.
But when you finally got themoney that could afford you to
get the thing that you wanted,you realize that was something
else most of the time that youneeded, and a lot of times for
(11:36):
me, the thing that I thought Iwanted so badly.
When I finally have theopportunity to get it, to go
after it, it's not even what Iwant, because it's so much more
deeper than that.
And while I'm on the journey, Icome across so many different
(11:56):
people, so many different thingsthat make me realize that it
may have started off with mebeing able to want a new pair of
shoes or a new outfit, but itended with me understanding who
I was as a person, what I coulddo and the things that I could
(12:20):
accomplish, how smart I was, howcreative I was, you know, and
the same for you, you know, ifyou start thinking about all the
things, like a time when youwanted something really bad that
you had to go out and get ityourself, you know, when you
start thinking about that, like,okay, did you get it?
And if you did get it, did youfeel as complete as you thought
(12:43):
you would feel, because, see,that's what happens a lot of
times too, when I'm onlythinking of the big picture,
when I'm only seeing thedestination and not experiencing
the whole journey.
When I get there, it's a letdown, because I don't have the same
emotion.
It's like I thought I wouldfeel more excited.
(13:05):
I thought I would feel moreaccomplished.
I thought that, you know, Ifeel like I've done it and you
know, everything is just.
But no, I feel like it feelslike a letdown.
I don't feel anything at all.
You know, I just I feel likethe same way I felt before
everything ever.
You know, I just I feel likethe same way I felt before
everything, ever anythinghappened, and that's because I
(13:25):
didn't understand the journey.
I didn't appreciate the journey.
I never stopped to think aboutall the things that happened,
all the things that led up toletting me be where I'm at.
We put so much energy intoreaching milestones, the perfect
job, dream house, financialfreedom and what it is we think
(13:49):
about that we think will make usfeel complete.
I mean, don't get me wrong,goals are great.
All I'm asking is that, whilewe're working toward what we
want, that we're also focused onwhat's next and that we really
think about where we're at inthe journey.
Don't rush through it, pushingyourself to go faster, thinking
(14:10):
we'll find happiness when wefinally arrive, and then we
don't, or worse.
But if we get there and we lookback and realize we missed
everything that was happening,that was meant to teach us, to
shape us, right along the way,right along the journey, we miss
it.
(14:33):
Let's shift the perspective alittle bit.
Imagine if we started seeingeach step we take as meaningful,
valuable, even when it feelsmessy or uncertain.
And I'm going to tell you rightnow, I am not the person who
likes uncertainty.
I dream big and I want to seethe end result, because I
(14:54):
already want to know what'sgoing to happen.
The idea of not knowing what'sgoing to happen, it's like my
anxiety is through the roof.
What's going to happen?
It's like my anxiety is throughthe roof.
But you know, I talked to avery, very wise person who said
that sometimes you have to sitin silence.
You have to have obedience, andwhen you're being obedient,
(15:19):
you're trusting the process.
Obedient, you're trusting theprocess.
Think about it Some of our mostpowerful lessons come from
unplanned and unexpected partsof life, those detours, those
moments where we feel lost.
They're the ones that teach usresilience, patience and who we
really are and sometimes who wewant to be.
(15:40):
One of the biggest lessons I'velearned is that the journey
teaches us things that thedestination never could.
Every single struggle, everysmall win, every setback those
are the experiences that give usstrength.
They make you wiser, they makeyou more compassionate and more
(16:00):
grounded.
But you have to be willing tobe present with them, even when
they're uncomfortable orimperfect.
And I'm telling you becauseI've been there.
I've been in uncomfortablepositions.
You know I'm a Capricorn and Iknow people know Capricorns can
(16:22):
be very judgmental people.
But I experienced something inmy life that made me realize
that we are all going throughsomething, we are all battling
something, and you never knowwhere someone is at in their
journey, because sometimespeople are there when people are
down the most.
(16:42):
They're in the thick of theirjourney and they just need one
person to show them some smallcompassion, small understanding.
I don't have to have walked inyour shoes to show compassion,
so just think about that.
You know, the next time you seesomeone, that's you know.
(17:02):
We start to, when we start tosay something.
I don't know what they're goingthrough.
I don't know that person andthey don't know me, because I
know when I was going through mystruggle, oh my gosh, honey,
honey, honey.
But I came out of it a morecompassionate person, a better
(17:26):
person, someone who listensbefore they talk, a person who
appreciates other people more.
And I think sometimes weunderestimate the power of
everyday moments.
We're going to shift a littlebit here, okay, because I think
(17:47):
it's also important that we findvalue in everyday moments.
We get so caught up on waitingfor the big life-changing events
and I know I do Like I'm readyfor some change, I'm ready for
things to happen, I'm on thisgrind, I am ready, but you have
to find those moments, thosevaluable moments in everyday
(18:07):
things.
It could be conversations, youknow, connecting with people.
You know this.
Most recently I went with agroup of friends and we went to
the movies and I was going toback out of the trip I really
was, but I'm glad I didn't.
(18:28):
I was able to have some amazingconversation with some amazing
women.
That gave me a great newperspective, you know, made me
really start shifting in mythought process, like, okay, so
what's important, you know, evenwhen I'm in a moment of
stillness where I'm justbreathing and trying to take it
(18:49):
all in.
I often reflect on thoseconversations and I'm like, hmm,
how can that was meant for me.
Like the fact that I remember,out of everything that was said,
that one thing that this personsaid stuck with me.
Like the fact that I remember,out of everything that was said,
that one thing that this personsaid stuck with me means it was
(19:10):
meant for me.
Now I can be a little, I canoveranalyze a little bit, but
sometimes, you know, we don'thave to analyze it to death, but
just know that there's a storyin there for us.
It's a reminder in that for us.
You know, we may not understandit at the moment, but we'll
always come back to it.
(19:31):
I remember a couple of monthsago I said to someone I was like
you know, maybe you know I needto have a little bit more like
life experiences, you know,happen for me.
You know, I'm just maybe, ifyou know, something else
(19:54):
happened.
Maybe I could relate a littlebit more.
I don't know why I said that,but let me tell you after I said
it, life happened.
Life happened and they said becareful what you ask for.
And I got what I asked for, butI came out as a better person,
more resilient person, astronger person.
(20:15):
So just know, sometimes, whenwe're asking for something, you
may get it.
But remember, even if it'sfrustrating, even if the
experience seems like it's aboutto break, us find joy in it,
(20:36):
because there's always somethingto be thankful for.
Even in the midst of a strugglethere's something worth
appreciating.
Because even in the midst of astruggle, there's something
worth appreciating.
Because even in the midst of mydarkest days, I had something
to be thankful for.
Whether I was thankful that Iwas not alone, there was someone
I could call, I had my family,I had my mom, I had my husband.
(20:58):
You know, the sun still cameout.
Every day.
There was a lot to be thankfulfor.
I once heard someone say thatordinary moments are the ones
we'll miss the most, and thatreally struck me, because, when
you think about it, it's true.
Those little in-between momentsmake up most of our lives.
So why not treasure them now?
(21:20):
And I know I talk aboutembracing the journey and
looking at how we, you know,slow down a little bit and, even
if we can see the destination,to kind of focus on the journey
that we're going through at thesame time.
But I say that because I wantyou to start embracing the
(21:43):
journey instead of fixating onthe destination.
So here are some ways that Ifeel like has helped me stay
grounded, and sometimes wealways got to remind ourselves.
But, like I said as I startedoff, this whole conversation was
practicing gratitude, and notjust for big things, but for
small things.
(22:04):
Sometimes things seeminsignificant, and not just for
big things, but for small things.
Sometimes things seeminsignificant Maybe it's a cup
of tea, a moment of silence, thefact that you even got through
the day, especially if it was atough day Like huh, I made it
through the day.
I didn't have to tell nobodyabout themselves.
I was able to let my ego goLike, yes, I spoke up for the
(22:24):
things that mattered and thethings that I felt like you know
what they was not going tointerrupt my peace.
I was able to let it, just letit go, and for that I'm grateful
, because now I'm in a moment ofpeace.
I did not let anyone oranything steal the peace that I
have within me.
And I will tell you what.
(22:45):
I do that a lot and I remindpeople that a lot Do not let
someone else steal your peace.
When we notice and appreciatethese moments, we start seeing
the value in the journey itselfand then reflect on what you're
learning.
Take time to ask yourself whatam I learning?
(23:09):
Right now, even if you're goingthrough a hard season, there's
something to be learned.
Maybe it's patience, maybe it'show to be resilient, or maybe
it's just learning how to listenor slow down.
Reflection helps us see growthin real time instead of waiting
until we've reached the end tolook back and realize real time.
Instead of waiting until we'vereached the end to look back and
(23:31):
realize I've grown a lot.
I went through a lot.
When you're reflecting andseeing that you can be like man
look how far I've come From lastweek to this week.
I have grown so much.
Not saying there won't be dayswhere you may slip back into old
habits, but hey, that's life.
It's recognizing being able'relearning and that you are
growing into the person that youwant to be.
(24:13):
The next thing is find joy inthe progress, not just
perfection.
Don't look for perfection, I'mtelling you.
I try to live a beautifullyunbalanced life.
Another thing that's helped mewhen I'm talking about finding
joy in the process itself is tojust be myself, be transparent.
This is it Celebrate the factthat I'm moving forward and I'm
(24:35):
not perfect, but hey, I'm in myseason of healing.
This is what it looks like.
So, whatever small steps I'mtaking, this is my process.
So, whatever small steps I'mtaking, this is my process.
And it's going to lookdifferent from someone else's
process, because what they needand how they deal with things,
our backgrounds, our culture allof that is so different.
(24:55):
So, no, it's going to bedifferent.
No, I'm not perfect, but myjourney and how I'm processing
this is going to be perfect forme, same way it's going to be
perfect for you.
And remember progress is worthcelebrating.
(25:22):
And the last thing is let go ofcomparison.
Don't be comparing yourself tonobody else.
Comparison is the enemy of afeeling journey.
When you are constantly lookingat somebody else's life and
their accomplishments, we robourselves of our own experiences
.
Remember that your path isyours alone and it's just as
valuable as anyone else's.
I always say it's easy to lookthrough the window at somebody
(25:44):
else and think that they got itmade.
My mama always said you don'tnever know what's going on
behind closed doors.
You don't never know what thatperson is going through.
It looks good on the outside,but you can't see behind those
doors.
So don't let anyone lie.
(26:06):
Fool you that it looks good.
Everything that looks goodain't always good, and I'll tell
you, there was a time when Ithought my journey wasn't adding
up.
I've compared myself to others,wondering if I was doing
something wrong because I hadn'tgotten to where I thought I
should be.
(26:26):
But when I started, lookingback on everything I've been
through, every challenge, everyunexpected turn, I realized that
those experiences were buildingme into someone stronger,
someone who was learning totrust her step, someone who was
learning to trust herself, stepby step, and that's when it
(26:47):
clicked with me.
The journey is where we becomewho we're meant to be.
It's where we find our strengthand our purpose, your personal
legend.
So start embracing the processinstead of rushing through it.
It's great to see the end andmanifest that into reality, but
(27:09):
just remember that it's going totake lots of little steps along
the way, lots of lessons, lotsof resilience.
But if you focus on celebratingit, reflecting on it and having
gratitude, even on the dayswhere it feels like you're
standing still or stuck in somequicksand, you'll get there.
(27:31):
We all get there.
Our personal legends, ourpurpose, that little feeling
that won't let you go until youfulfill it.
If you're getting comfortable,it's time to get uncomfortable.
It's time to let life be alittle messy and enjoy the
journey.
(27:53):
So, as we wrap up today, I wantyou to take a moment to
appreciate where you are rightnow, not because it's perfect,
but because it's real, becauseit's a part of your story.
The journey isn't just a pathto something greater.
It's where life happens.
It's where growth happens.
(28:14):
So here's my challenge for youthis week Slow down, notice the
small moments and ask yourselfwhat am I learning today?
And remember that the journeyis worth savoring every single
step of the way.
All right, my friends, thankyou so much for spending your
time with me today.
(28:34):
If this episode has resonatedwith you, I'd love it if you
share it with someone who mightneed a reminder that their
journey matters too.
Let's keep uplifting each otheras we move forward step-by-step
.
Until next time, my friendnamaste.
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