March 11, 2025 • 43 mins
Marie Malvoisin's transformative journey from Army officer to empowerment photographer reveals the profound power of reclaiming your authentic self. After serving 20 years in the military, Marie found herself emotionally depleted – functioning externally while dying inside, caught in an endless cycle of giving without receiving. The turning point came during a deployment when she discovered the revolutionary concept that "no is a complete sentence."
Through her luxury boudoir photography studio, Bohemian Vision, Marie has created something far more meaningful than a photography business. She's built a sanctuary where women can safely explore vulnerability, often for the first time. What makes her approach revolutionary is her deep understanding of energy dynamics – many women operate predominantly in masculine energy as a defense mechanism when feeling unsafe in their environments. Marie's studio becomes the rare space where they can safely surrender to their feminine energy: creative, fluid, and powerfully vulnerable.
The session experience engages all senses – from carefully selected scents to textural elements like satin and velvet, creating an environment where clients gradually shed their armor. Marie describes the magical moment in each session when something shifts, and a woman sees herself through the camera and exclaims, "That's me!" with genuine wonder. For many clients, particularly those who've experienced trauma, this becomes the moment they reclaim ownership of their bodies and stories.
Marie's philosophy of "do it scared" encourages women to push beyond their comfort zones, reminding us that true confidence comes from facing fears rather than avoiding them. Her work demonstrates that vulnerability, is our greatest source of power. Through her lens, women discover they are indeed "that girl" – the confident, sensual being they've always been but perhaps never fully recognized.
Ready to rediscover yourself through Marie's transformative lens? Visit bohemianvisions.com or follow Bohemian Visions Photography on Instagram to begin your journey of self-reclamation.
#selfdevelopment #Wellness
#thym4teawithmikita #manifest #purposefulliving #liveunapplogectically #freedom #podcast #womeninpodcast #podcastlife #empoweringwomen
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
You know, one of the questions I ask is what would
you do with an extra boost ofconfidence?
And then, as I've kind ofdeveloped more and more into the
business, I've realized that agood majority of women are very
insecure.
They're very insecure abouttheir bodies, they're insecure
about their voice, they're veryinsecure about their sensuality,
their sexuality, and I wantBohemian Visions to be like a
(00:25):
therapy session where you havepictures that remind you that
you are that girl.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
Hey there, I'm Makita , a small town girl with big
dreams who started a podcastwith an old headset and a laptop
at my kitchen table and made mydreams come true.
On my podcast, time for Teawith Makita, we chat about
living life unapologetically, onyour terms, from career advice,
entrepreneurship, relationshipsand everything in between.
(00:52):
This is your one-stop shop forreal conversations and
inspiration.
If you're looking forconnection, then you've found it
here.
Join me every Tuesday as wedive into those sometimes hard
to have conversations.
So grab your cup of tea orcoffee and get comfy, because
this is time for Tea with Makita, and the tea is definitely hot.
(01:14):
Ever feel like you need asuperpower boost of motivation
with exclusive tips and toolswith your goals in mind?
Well, say hello to your newinspiration hotspot the Tuesday
Tea Newsletter, your weeklyinfusion of big thinking energy
that will propel you to chaseyour wildest dreams and never
shy away from using the power ofyour voice.
Sign up for the Tuesday TeaNewsletter today at
(01:36):
beautifullyunbalancedcom andelevate your goals to the next
level.
Welcome back everyone.
I'm Nikita.
I just want to thank you somuch for sharing your time, your
space and, of course, youramazing energy with me.
Today, this season, we're divinginto the theme of planting
seeds, exploring how small,intentional actions can lead to
(01:58):
powerful transformations in ourlives.
And today I'm so excited towelcome an extraordinary guest,
marie Malvinson.
Marie is a 20-year Army veteranturned entrepreneur and founder
of Bohemian Vision Studio.
It is a luxury Bordeauxphotography studio based in
(02:19):
Richmond, virginia, and I just Iwant y'all to understand
something Marie's work is notjust about photography.
She is a trailblazer, helpingwomen rediscover their
confidence and celebrate theirunique stories through the art
of boudoir.
(02:39):
Share not just her photographyand what she's doing to help
women transform their lives, butalso to share a little bit
about her transformation and howshe was able to step into that
power to help other people.
And I just want you to knowsomething else this is not just
physical, this is emotional,it's a spiritual shift, it's
(02:59):
that ripple far beyond theseason.
So I want you to grab your cupof tea, people.
I want you to settle in and getready for a conversation that
will help empower you, give youthe confidence and self-love
that you need to plant seeds fortomorrow.
Marie, thank you and welcome.
Speaker 1 (03:17):
Thank you so much.
Oh, my God, it was justeverything that you're saying
when I tell you I am obsessedwith you.
I'm obsessed with your pillars,your values and what you are
creating in regards to being abetter you, both mentally,
emotionally and physically, andI'm like yes, thank you so much.
(03:39):
I'm so honored and blessed tobe on your show.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
Well, thank you, and I just want people to know that
it's very humbling and veryamazing to have people like you
come on the show with so muchgenuine energy and just the
ability to want to help otherpeople, but also walk the walk,
been on the journey and want toshare it with other people, so
(04:06):
I'm just as excited to have you.
Yes, now, marie, let's start bytalking about your journey from
20 years in the army tofounding Bohemian Vision Studio
and planning for you to makesuch a bold transition, and I
planted that seed for you tomake such a bold transition.
Speaker 1 (04:25):
Of course, of course.
I joined the army in 1999.
So I was 17 years old and itwas homecoming week.
I was bumping heads really badin my household and me and my
(04:46):
mother did not see eye to eye onwhere I wanted to go after high
school.
And I remember just walkinginto the army recruiting station
and I was like I want to jointhe army.
And they're like what?
I got to get out of my mama'shouse and they're like how old
are you?
And I'm like I was 16.
And they're like, uh, when doyou turn 17?
(05:08):
I'm like September.
And they're like, okay, well,you have to.
Can you wait till you're 18?
No, I got to get out of mymama's house, so I had to do
some sales pitch because I hadto get a waiver and went through
the entire MEPS process,graduated from high school and a
month later I shipped off toFort Leonard Wood, missouri, for
(05:28):
basic training.
And I'll never forget the firstnight of the basic training.
I was like where did I getmyself into?
And I cried myself to sleep.
It was 4th of July, weekend,1999.
And I cried myself to sleep andI was like where did I get
myself into?
And my friends went off to go tocollege.
I wanted to go to college but Ididn't have the money to go to
college and I kind of slackedoff my senior years.
(05:50):
I was cutting class and I wasjust over it.
I was mentally checked out andI was like I should have went to
college.
Oh my God, oh my God.
And I was like this is not forme and I cried like I can't wait
to get out.
It's about to be a long threeyears.
And one thing led to another.
They sent me to Korea and mylife changed and they were like
hey, do you want to stay forlike another three years and
(06:12):
we'll pay you $14,000?
I'm like, well, I got nothingelse to do.
Sure, why not?
And every time I thought aboutgetting out, I was thinking can
you stay?
We'll give you some money.
I'm like, sure, why not?
And then, the entire time I wasin, I was taking college
courses and I was trying to bebetter.
And I remember this piece ofadvice that one of my
non-commissioned officers gaveme.
It was like leave with morethan what you came with.
(06:34):
So every time you go to a dutystation, if you came to a duty
station with no college, leavewith a little bit of college,
leave with a little bit of moneyin your pocket, leave with more
.
And it's not something likephysical and materialistic, but
leave with more knowledge, leavewith more experience, leave
with something that you can showfor.
(06:54):
And so I started doing that.
And then one of my mentors waslike you know what you should be
an officer.
And I'll never forget it wasjust like yesterday.
I was like I don't want to bean officer and I'll never forget
.
It was just like yesterday.
I was like, oh, I don't want tobe an officer.
They're lame, they don't haveany common sense, right?
I like being an NCO.
And he's like, no, we needofficers like you.
And I was like, okay, I'll doit.
And I went through the programand I finished my bachelor's
(07:18):
degree and I was like, okay.
So I went on to be a logisticsofficer.
And it was just like, challengeafter challenge after challenge,
and I'll never forget my firstdeployment to Iraq and I had one
of those self-catharticemotional experiences where,
growing up, I will put my issuesin a box and I'll just pile it
(07:40):
in a box, in a box constantly.
And then one thing led toanother, everything just
exploded.
Because when you're deployed,it's just you, your thoughts and
the mission.
And so when you're not onmission and you're not doing
work, you're just alone in yourthoughts in this like 40 foot
container that is your room thatyou're living in and there's no
privacy, and you're just likewhy am I feeling so emotional?
(08:01):
And I cried so much?
And it was just one of thosethings where it was like okay,
I've been battling demons andbattling a lot of issues that
I've just kind of been snuffingand shoving into the box, and
then the box finally explodedrediscover and find myself and
(08:26):
find my peace.
And I was still struggling withbalancing boundaries, knew
nothing about boundaries, and Iwas really struggling with
balancing motherhood and beingan army officer.
And then I got married.
So it was balancing being awife, being a mother, being an
officer.
And then, because I wasstruggling with juggling these
competing requirements, my ex atthe time was like you're not
(08:47):
giving me enough attention.
And then my son was just kindof withdrawn like oh, she's just
busy, she don't care about me.
And then my job was like weneed more and more and more.
And then it got to the pointwhere I'll never forget I was
just in tears because it waslike everyone was pulling at me
Take, take, take at me, take,take, take.
(09:08):
And so that was the one part inmy life where I felt like my
cup was bone dry, just bone dry.
Everyone was just take, take,take, and I had nothing for
myself and I fell into this deepdepression.
So I was depressed but I wasfunctioning like I had on this
mask that I always had a smileon my face, but if you saw
behind the smile, I was justdying on the inside.
And I remember sitting in mytruck in tears, wanting to just
(09:31):
escape, and I was going totherapy trying to unpack and
process my emotions and mytherapist was like, are you
suicidal?
I was like I'm not suicidal.
I feel like I fell in a holeand every time I try to climb
out of the hole, the hole justkept getting deeper and deeper.
And while it's getting deeper,it's because people were taking,
(09:51):
they were taking away from meand I could not breathe.
So I had a son who I could notbe present for.
I had a career that was justtoxic and demanding, had a
husband who was like you're notgiving me any attention and
you're not being there for me,wait, wait, wait.
And I was like I didn't sign upfor this marriage.
I didn't sign up to be a motherto a second child.
No, and I'll never forget.
(10:11):
I ended up having to havesurgery because I did not
realize, in hindsight is 2020,when you're dealing with a lot
of stress.
Stress manifests in a way whereI was suffering from chronic
pain.
My back would just lock up onme and I couldn't move.
And then, because I couldn't beas active as I was, I had
gained a lot of weight.
And then I was depressed to thepoint where I would sleep 12
(10:35):
hours on the weekends.
I could not wake up and it wasjust like oh my God, this is not
my life, this is not the lifethat I want.
Oh my God, this is not my life.
This is not the life that Iwant.
And then, after I had got backfrom leave sick leave they're
like hey, we got some news foryou.
You just came down on orders togo to Afghanistan.
I'm like I'll take it, I willtake it.
(10:55):
It's been seven years since Ihad a deployment.
I said I will take it.
So this was 2017.
And I'm just thinking to myself, you know what, even though I'm
dealing with the mission, letme go.
I go to Afghanistan.
Two weeks into the deployment Iwas like what did I sign up for?
And I was like this is about tobe a long year.
(11:17):
And that was the year I waslike let me focus on me, let me
focus on filling my cup.
So I started, I went on mission, I did my job.
When I wasn't doing my job, Ispent time in the gym and then I
started listening to audiobooks, and I'll never forget the
book how to Be a Badass by JenSincero.
(11:38):
And they were like loveyourself.
And this is the first time Ilearned boundaries.
I learned boundaries at 37years of age and they were like
don't be afraid to say no.
And it was the little things,because I was the type of person
I never said no and peoplewould just spring things at the
last minute.
And it was like take, take,take, take, take.
And I'll never forget.
Someone was like do you want tosign this card?
(12:00):
No, what?
I'm like.
I don't know this person.
No, well, do you want to go tothis farewell and put money into
this gift?
No, when I tell you, it was themost liberating feeling like oh
no, and it became my favoriteword no is a complete sentence.
(12:22):
No is a complete sentence.
It was the first time where Isaid no without offering any
explanation, no, without givingany excuses.
It was no, why not?
Because I said so.
No is a complete sentence andit was just the most cathartic,
liberating, freeing experienceever.
(12:42):
And so, when I got back fromAfghanistan, they're like what
are you going to do?
I am going to be Marie.
The whole time I was inAfghanistan, they were like what
do you want to do when you comeback home?
I said I'm going to retire.
They're like you look so young,you should stay long.
No, they're like well, what areyou going to do when you retire
?
I'm going to be Marie.
I am going to live my authenticself.
(13:03):
And people did not understandwhat I meant by that.
So I'm going to start living myauthentic self.
The whole time I was in thearmy, that was Captain Malvison
and then there was Marie.
They were always for it, butthe first time I am Marie.
I'm Marie the business owner,marie, the mom, marie, just
Marie.
And it's so freeing, it's soliberating and that was like the
(13:27):
best decision ever.
So 2020, I officially retiredwith 20 years and eight months,
and I don't regret it, I'm happy.
And while I was transitioning, Iwas like, well, what do you
want to do?
I said I want to do somethingthat makes me happy.
I don't want to work forsomeone else.
I want to do something thatmakes me happy.
I don't want to work forsomeone else, I want to do
something that brings me joy,something that will help inspire
(13:49):
other people.
And so I was like you know what?
I'm very good at photography.
I've been doing photography asa hobby.
It was just so relaxing and Iloved the art that I would
create and I was like I'm goingto go ahead and be a
professional photographer.
And you know, six years later,it's been like the best decision
ever and it's the mostrewarding aspect.
(14:10):
Like I was like you know what Iwould rather make $50,000 a
year doing something that bringsme joy than making $130,000 a
year that makes me miserable.
Speaker 2 (14:20):
I agree.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
Yes, and then the first thing that come out of my
mouth when I wake up in themorning is F this, f it versus.
You know what?
I'm hustling, I'm grinding, I'mmarketing my business, but the
reviews that I get where myclients are like thank you so
much for making me feel like agoddess.
Thank you so much for making mefeel so beautiful.
(14:42):
I never thought I could be thisbeautiful.
No amount of money in the worldcan replace that, and I love
what I do can replace that and Ilove what I do.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
I can definitely tell it seems like your whole
journey, from making thatdecision to join the Army, even
when there's moments when youhad those self-reflections, some
challenges, some struggles,some moments where you just had
to sit with it, it seems like itwas all preparing you for what
it would take to be theentrepreneur, to find yourself.
And through every journey,through every self-discovery, I
(15:19):
don't think sometimes we realizethat when we're in the journey,
that we are already becomingeverything that we don't even
know yet, like we're working onit, we're walking into it.
On it, we're walking into it,and you mentioned that you were
this.
Photography was something youjust love to do for relaxation
at one point, and then it becamelike a part of you.
(15:41):
Now how did you take thephotography and turn it into
something that empowered womenin such a way and turn it into
something that empowered womenin such a way.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
So it's interesting because one of the things like I
will give the Army credit foris my organizational skills.
Like I was an operationsofficer, I was a logistics
officer, I was a commander, Iknew how to manage people.
So I am actually a secondgeneration entrepreneur.
Like I come from a line ofentrepreneurs.
I just avoided it for thelongest because I saw how
difficult it was and the grind,but it was just one of those
things where I'm like you knowwhat I'm going to do.
(16:21):
This on my terms, I am going towork and do what makes me happy
.
Like I never want to seeanother PowerPoint presentation
for as long as I live PowerPointpresentation for as long as I
live.
And what ended up turning intoempowerment was that I was doing
some test shoots with an oldcoworker and she's like you're
so natural at it.
(16:41):
And I'm like you know, tiltyour head, smile, close your
eyes, do this.
And he's like, wow, you're sonatural, like I feel so
comfortable with you.
And boudoir ended up being ahappy accident.
I thought I was going to be ageneral photographer where I did
student photography, babies,maternity shoots, engagement
shoots and all that and Iremember I did one wedding and I
(17:04):
hated it with a passion.
I said, oh no, no, absolutelynot, I don't think so.
I left one high stress career.
I'm not going to start anotherone.
No Like, since I've retired, itis all about protecting my
peace.
Since being divorced, it's beenprotecting my peace.
(17:24):
It's my peace first andforemost.
Anything that disrupts my peace, you got to go.
So I always look at it as youare a guest in my ecosystem,
that's right.
You disrupt my ecosystem, youwill be immediately ejected.
You got to go.
So wedding photography was justnot my thing.
(17:45):
I said, okay, I need to figureout something.
So I went to this meetup groupwith other photographers.
I was like we're going to doboudoir, and at first I avoided
photographers.
I was like we're going to doboudoir and at first I avoided
it.
I was like I don't know, I'mnot sure, nudes, whatever.
And I just saw how creepy themale photographers were and I
was like wait, hold up.
And I remember this one malephotographer was telling the
model hey, can you get on yourhands and knees?
And where we were shooting at,the floor was unfinished.
(18:09):
And so the model, I'm glad,spoke up for herself.
She was like I'm not doing that.
I stepped in and was like, whatare you doing?
Because he was just like Icould see through his viewfinder
.
He was taking pictures of herin such an inappropriate way and
I'm like, whoa, time out, thisis not cool.
And then I remember asking herI was like, are you okay?
And she was like, yeah, I'mokay.
And I'm just like yo, this weneed to stop.
(18:31):
And, mind you, we're like mixedgender, so it was like women
and men, but I was the only onethat was speaking up, like yo,
let's not be creepy about this.
So I'm on YouTube and I ended upwatching this boudoir
photographer out in LA and he'smaking content.
I'm like, oh so this is whatboudoir is really about.
It's about empowerment, it'sabout women feeling good about
(18:52):
themselves.
And that's how I was like youknow what, let me take this
mastermind course.
And it just went from there andit has been the most rewarding.
I wished I would have stumbledinto boudoir when I was in my
twenties and thirties, reallyunderstanding how empowerment
works, really understanding how,when you love on yourself, when
(19:13):
you are protecting your peace,you know how to say no.
You know how to enforceboundaries.
People don't like that.
They don't like that.
Speaker 2 (19:23):
No, they do not.
When you understand and knowwho you are, it's a different
feeling and people understandthat energy, energy.
They just can't treat youanyway.
They can't say anything theywant to you like they.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
They really have to kind of step back and the people
that don't honor that willdefinitely stay out of your way
oh yeah, and you know peopletell me all the time they're
like you're so intimidating, youwere like no nonsense, straight
to the point, and it's likeit's it's a lot of being in the
military, but at the same timeit's like you're not going to
play my face.
And society is very conflictavoidant to a certain degree,
(20:00):
where I see it in my businessall the time, where people will
schedule a consult and then,instead of just canceling it,
they'll like ghost.
Or instead of saying hey, Ican't afford the services,
they'll just like not answer thephone, not pick up, or they'll
just completely ghost me and I'mlike, look man, I got more
important things to do to chaseafter you.
(20:20):
It's okay.
If you're not ready, you're notready.
There's no pressure becauseyou're investing in yourself and
this is a commitment.
Also, you're investing in beingthe better version of yourself.
You're investing in being theperson in your head that is
strong, that is confident.
One of the questions I ask iswhat would you do with an extra
(20:42):
boost of confidence?
And then, as I've developedmore and more into the business,
I've realized that a goodmajority of women are very
insecure.
They're very insecure abouttheir bodies.
They're insecure about veryinsecure.
They're very insecure abouttheir bodies, they're insecure
about their voice.
They're very insecure abouttheir sensuality, their
confidence, their sexuality.
They're so insecure that theydon't know how to communicate
(21:04):
with their partners like kiss mehere, touch me there, go slow,
go fast.
They're intimidated by that andI want Bohemian Visions to be
like a four and a half hourtherapy session where you have
pictures that remind you thatyou are that girl, you have that
sauce and you are the maincharacter in your book, in your
(21:25):
narrative.
Speaker 2 (21:28):
I love that.
Yeah, because you're right.
Like growing up, especially forme, my mom never talked about
like owning your sexuality.
You know you're not reallytaught to own it, to embrace it,
that it's okay to just leadwith that.
(21:50):
Yeah, if that's who you areLike, if you're honest, you
can't go wrong.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Oh yeah, absolutely, absolutely it's.
It's cathartic, like a lot ofmy clients are like.
I just want to be feminine.
I'm, I'm, you know, operatingin my masculine.
I want to know what it's liketo be feminine.
And one of the things that theydon't realize is when a woman
is operating in her masculineenergy is because either her
environment or the person thatis in her proximity is making
(22:21):
her unsafe.
It is a subconscious defensemechanism.
You are not safe because whenyou're in your masculine, you're
constantly on alert.
You're like charge, you're asoldier, right, that was me when
I was in the army.
I was constantly in mymasculine because my environment
was not safe.
I was emotionally unsafe.
(22:42):
I was, to a degree, physicallyunsafe, because when I say
physically, it meant I didn'ttrust anyone.
And because the military had asexual assault issue, I viewed
every man that I worked with asan op.
When I was deployed inAfghanistan, when I was deployed
in Iraq, I walked around withknives on me.
I was G'd up F around, if youwant to.
(23:05):
But, baby, let me tell yousomething.
Try me if you want to.
There will be physical evidencethat in a court of law, there
is no doubt something happened.
So I walked.
I mean, imagine walking aroundin this heightened state of
anxiety, right, you're not safe.
(23:25):
So when I tell women this,they're like, oh my God, I
didn't realize that I was likesomething in your environment is
making you unsafe.
This is why you're operating inyour masculine when you're
operating in your full feminine.
And it's interesting how peoplethey don't necessarily know how
to articulate the differencebetween masculine and feminine
energy.
Feminine energy is extremelycreative and fluid.
(23:46):
You're flowing, you are free,very, very free.
It's soft, kind of like air andwater, right, you're just
moving.
So if I had to sit there anddescribe the different elements
of masculine and feminine, thefeminine is water and air.
They move and they flow andthey either occupy the container
(24:07):
and then, if something's notright, they'll break free out of
it, and then masculine energyis earth and fire.
They're very constant, they'resteady.
Another example of feminine andmasculine is masculine energy is
the sun.
It's constant.
Feminine energy is the moon.
It goes in phases because it'sflowing.
(24:28):
You know, you have the fullmoon, you have the new moon, the
crescent and the waning, and sowe both occupy both energies.
It's just one is going to be alittle bit more dominant than
the other.
So since I started boudoirphotography, I'm more in my
feminine, and by me being in myfeminine, it allows me to be
extremely creative.
But there's going to be timeswhere I have to turn that off
(24:50):
and become a business woman andbe like okay.
So when I'm in my businesswoman mode, I'm in my masculine.
Okay, we're straight to thepoint.
It's not about emotions, it'snot about your feelings.
It's like look we, we got toget this done, and all that.
When you step into my studio,it's the feminine, it's how are
you feeling?
Let's, we are going to tap intoour emotions.
We're going to tap into ourbasal instincts and our basal
(25:12):
feelings and tap into what turnsyou on, what makes you feel
sexy, what are your fantasiesand everything else.
Speaker 2 (25:19):
And this is the first time in so long being in my 40s
where I've learned how tobalance it how you described
that feminine energy versus thatmasculine energy, because we
all kind of step into and out ofthat so many times.
But you're right, when you comein there, when you I don't care
(25:41):
what type of studio you walkinto you're already kind of a
little on edge because you don'tknow what to expect.
You have an idea, but yourguards are up and in that moment
you are vulnerable.
So, like stepping into aboudoir session, how do you help
(26:03):
people emotionally?
You know, settle that and be inthat emotion.
And it's also kind of spiritual, like you're sitting there and
you're like really absorbing whoyou are and who you want to
become in those, in those photos, so you can, like you said,
look back later and say I am allof those things.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
Yeah, no, that is an amazing question.
So my studio is a totalolfactory, total sensory
experience.
It's the scent, with thecandles and the plugins that I
have, where you smell the muskand the vanilla and it's very
sweet and it's very earthy atthe same time.
(26:46):
Then there's the ambiance.
You know how, whenever you'reabout to take a bath and you
light the candles and you dimthe lights, that's my entire
studio just dimming the lights.
When you step into a studio,it's about stripping down, both
literal and figurative.
You don't necessarily have totake your clothes off, but you
are stripping down to who isMarie, who is Makita?
(27:07):
Not the mom, not the wife, notthe business owner, who are you.
And that's when you get toreally tap in.
And then, when you step in, Iexpect my clients to be nervous.
They're like, oh, I'm sonervous.
I'm like I want you to benervous, you know, because it's
natural.
And it's normal because you're,you're stripping down in front
of me, you're being vulnerable.
And another thing aboutfeminine energy is the feminine
(27:29):
is about vulnerability andpeople are afraid of that, right
.
And so vulnerability isactually strength, because you
are bearing your soul, you arebearing your skin.
So when you step in and you seelike the satin and the fur
because it's also textural, youknow sensory feeling, where you
feel the satin, you feel thevelvet couch, you feel the fur
(27:53):
rug.
And then when you sit in theglam room, my team is like, hey,
how are you doing and how longhave you been thinking about it?
And we're just getting youcomfortable.
Then we turn the music on.
It's like what makes you feelgood?
What type of music do you liketo listen to?
So it's a complete, totalsensory experience where you're
going to be nervous.
And that's why my sessions area lot longer than the standard
(28:15):
industry, because I want to takemy time and I want you to feel
relaxed and you know what?
The most beautiful thing and itnever gets old with me is when
that light, something switches,where they're like okay, I got
this.
And they see the photos.
And I turn and I show them.
You know their photo Like Itake a couple of shots and I'm
like okay, close your eyes, turnyour head, cut your eyes at me,
(28:38):
lift your chin oh my God,that's me, I'm so pretty.
And then they're like okay, Igot this, we're good.
It is the most rewarding andbeautiful feeling in the world.
Speaker 2 (28:49):
Well, my music would definitely be some Janet Jackson
, I think.
Speaker 1 (28:53):
Oh yes, yes, Velvet Rope and Janet, yes.
Speaker 2 (28:59):
Yes, I'd definitely be tapping into my Janet era.
Speaker 1 (29:03):
Absolutely oh, tap in .
I've had clients that are likeI'm not taking my clothes off,
it's okay, it's okay.
And another thing is, while youare being vulnerable with me,
you're still in control.
So it's the little things likemay I touch you, may I adjust
you?
You still have control.
How are you feeling?
I feel good, I feel okay.
And then I have a fullyfunctional copper tub.
(29:26):
That's huge.
And sometimes my clients willhave the bath experience and I'm
like, okay, we'll take a coupleof shots and I'll just enjoy
this beautiful bathroom.
They're totally submerged andmy plus size clients are like
I've never been this covered up,like the water comes completely
covered.
They get to just sit back andthey relax and they're like I
wish I could have this bathroomyeah and they change and they're
(29:53):
like okay, I could be naked andI still keep them modest and
it's all about the art, and sothe studio is so artistic and
it's all about like turning youinto a work of art to say, wow,
that's me.
Speaker 2 (30:09):
I love that reminder and, for anyone that's listening
and they're like a littleunsure about embracing their own
confidence or trying somethingoutside of their comfort zone,
what advice would you give them?
Speaker 1 (30:25):
Can you repeat the question one more time?
My love.
Speaker 2 (30:57):
Sure, you know people are.
You know, and I've seen some ofmy friends like.
I had one friend that she tookthe whole boudoir experience and
I was like man, I understoodthat I could, but I was a little
unsure about embracing my ownconfidence, like stepping
outside of my comfort zone.
And now I'm 40, I really don't.
I don't have all of that.
That's what it is.
You grow into who you are, butwe all hit those different
phases in our lives at differenttimes.
So for anyone that they're like, I want to embrace it but I'm
(31:20):
not quite sure how do I stepinto that zone of saying just go
with it?
Like what advice would you givethem to say I would say think
about what's stopping you.
Speaker 1 (31:32):
You know, the number one reason most women want to do
it but that stops them is liketheir weight.
I was like sweetie, the weightdon't mean nothing.
What will take you six monthsin a gym, some shadow lighting
and some uncomfortable poseswill get you snatched Right.
I would say remember when youwere a child and you were
learning how to ride a bike forthe first time and you kept
(31:53):
falling and you were so scared.
And then, when you finally gotit and you were rolling, you're
like I got it.
I did it, I did it.
That's why I say do it scared.
The biggest confidence boosteris when you're scared and you're
terrified of something and youdo it.
I remember the first time Iwent rappelling I was scared and
(32:15):
terrified out of my mind.
Do I want to do it again?
No, but the fact that I did itit was like, oh my God, I did it
.
I did it.
And that is the biggestconfidence booster is what is
something that terrifies youPublic speaking, posing nude for
some art and then it's like, ohmy God, I did it.
Okay, we're good and it'sawesome.
(32:36):
And I said do it scared, likedon't let that hold you back.
And one of my favoritephilosophies since I've, since
my twenties do you want to bethe type of person that wish
they should have could have didit, or do you want to be the
person that did it?
Speaker 2 (32:53):
Hmm.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
If you were to die tomorrow?
Are you satisfied with the lifethat you live today?
Speaker 2 (33:03):
yeah, and that's the, that's the mentality I have
about everything that scares me.
But I'm like because if itscares me, then evidently, um,
it's moving me in the rightdirection because there's some
growth there.
There's definitely something Ineed to learn there.
And I take those scary momentsand I remind myself when I
(33:23):
happen like you did that, likeyou actually did, and if you did
that, like you actually did,and if you did that, you can do
anything.
And that's what I say about.
I'm afraid of heights, but I'mthe first one to be like we
should take a flight.
I am always like we should takea flight.
And then I'm like why did yousay that?
Speaker 1 (33:43):
The first time I went scuba diving, I was so
terrified.
I was like, oh my God, I did it.
And after it was done and I gotover my fear, I was like, oh my
God, I'm 40 meters underwaterand I'm swimming with the fish
and I'm scuba diving.
And then the next time, yeah, Iwant to go scuba diving again.
Or the first time I went jetskiing, it was like, oh my God,
(34:04):
let's do this.
Or crossing over a bridge withATV, it's a 100-foot drop and
I'm scared of heights.
And I'm like why do I always dothings with heights?
And when it's done, it's like,oh my God, I did it, I did it
and it's something that I dowith my son.
He's like are you scared?
He's like, yeah, I'm scared.
And then I was like I got you,I got you.
(34:25):
He's like, yeah, I'm scared.
And then I was like I got you,I got you.
He's like okay.
He's like do you trust me?
I trust you.
And he did it.
And I was like how's yourconfidence?
I can do it, let's do it.
And it's just, it's the samething with my clients.
It's like I understand you'rescared, but do you trust me?
(34:48):
I got you.
And then, towards the end ofthe sessions.
When they see their photos atthe end, it's like that's me.
That's my favorite expression.
I hear the most.
That's me, yeah it's awesome.
Speaker 2 (34:52):
I love the fact that you really take your time with
like getting to know the personbecause, like you said, even
though sometimes I think we walkinto situations we kind of
forget that we are still incontrol of what happens that
whole respect for saying can Itouch you, can I move you here?
(35:14):
You know, tell me what you like.
Like you, you have the perfectpersonality and a complete
warmth for like really bringingout the best in someone to show
up as their authentic self asthey go through their journey.
And to me, I think it's reallyall about going through the
(35:36):
journey and part of thatself-discovery is seeing
yourself in all the layers.
And, like you're saying, it'slike pulling back the layers and
seeing yourself in a way that Ithink, in a beautiful way that
you never dreamed possible, thatyou could see yourself.
Speaker 1 (35:53):
All right.
I remember working with a modeland she was so scared you know
she's not really a model per se.
I was like rebuilding myportfolio and my content chief
was like my sister wants to do aboudoir session and I was like,
okay, she's never modeledbefore.
I said that's okay, because sheis a exact archetype of my
(36:17):
client.
They've never modeled before.
And we did a session forHalloween and she was like, okay
, I'm scared.
I said I got you, boo, I gotyou.
And she's like this is soawesome.
And she cried and I was like Ijust want you to remember, when
you see your photos, you arethat girl and you have that
sauce.
So I called her back in to doanother session because I just
(36:38):
love the glam look, like mymakeup artist did, and since it
was a Halloween, I wanted to addher into my portfolio.
But I loved her Halloweenphotos so much because it was
the first time I created a brandnew set.
I call it the Courtyard.
It's just my favorite set andjust the way she was just really
stepping into her feminine andit was the first time she really
(37:01):
let go and she's really feelingherself.
I said you know, I'm going toput you in a gallery, she didn't
know when.
So the photos came in and Ihung her up in a gallery and she
was in the middle of doing herhair and makeup and I was like
you know what, call her downhere, it's just like she's not
done yet, it's okay.
It's okay Cause if she startscrying and you know, jojo, my
makeup artist can fix her makeup.
And what I did was I walked herbackwards and I was like you
(37:23):
remember when you first oh man,I don't want to cry.
You remember when you came intothe studio the first time, she
was like, yeah, and I was likeyou remember how you felt?
And she's like, yeah, and I waslike you remember what was
going through your mind and howscared you was.
And she was like, yeah, and I'mwalking her backwards.
And then I stopped her and Iturned her around and she saw
(37:45):
her portrait on the 30 by 40.
Oh Lord, a 30 by 40 canvas.
And she just broke down andcried and she's like that's me
and I'm so pretty.
And I'm like, yeah, this wasFriday too, so it was super
recent.
And she was like that's me.
And I'm like that's you, thatis you, you're in my gallery,
(38:08):
because I have a gallery on thefirst floor and I was like I
want you to know that you arethat girl and you are beautiful
and you are enough and don't,ever, ever, let anyone take
power from you to make you feelless, than to make you feel
worthy, to make you feel likeyou're not beautiful.
(38:28):
I want you to know, look atyour photos and know that you
are that girl.
And she cried and she's likethat's me and I'm on your wall
and I'm like, damn, that is you.
And it just reminded me of whyI do what I do.
I have this rule that I don'tcry on social media or in media,
but this is so powerful becauseit's like.
You know, I've had my clientscry, but to see her, I'm like
(38:52):
you are beautiful, we all knowyou're beautiful.
You just need to see thatyou're beautiful.
And it was like I'm like, oh,don't cry, I'm doing an Ariana
(39:17):
Grande thing, like I'm not doingit.
I'm not doing it.
I'm trying not to throw mymakeup because we're filming
content and just seeing the lookon her face this big 30 by 40
canvas wall art of her naked inthe courtyard just serving face
(39:42):
body, is tea and I'm like I dothis.
This is my passion, do thisBecause I want women to know
that you are that girl.
Never, ever give power tosomeone to be the author of your
story, your book.
You are the author of your bookand just seeing that was like
(40:05):
the most rewarding, and I thinkabout it and I'm like I love my
job and I never had this feelingbeing in the army.
You know, being in the army isgo go go and it's like being
present, being in the moment,and it's like I get paid to pour
into you, I get paid to fillyour cup.
(40:25):
It's deeper than the photos.
Speaker 2 (40:29):
To me, boudoir is about being enough.
You have to be present and youhave to be in the moment,
because you have to appreciateevery second of it, but to see
the end result, to really own itand say this is me, I'm enough,
I'm beautiful, I'm all of thosethings.
(40:51):
It's a feeling and it's atransformation that you can't
get anywhere else.
Speaker 1 (41:01):
It's the most rewarding feeling in the world
to help transform women whoexperienced something traumatic,
who's victimized, had theirpersonal space violated in the
worst way, and for them toreclaim their power yeah take it
back people thing.
It's like you are reclaimingyour power, you're reclaiming
(41:22):
who you are, and it's.
I can't ask for anything morerewarding than that.
Speaker 2 (41:31):
And they're doing it in the most vulnerable feminine
way of flow and energy thatripples out.
Because when you leave thereI'm sure every woman that leaves
that studio with suchempowerment they take that
energy and they spread it to thenext person, because that's how
(41:53):
empowerment is for me.
When I'm in that energy andthat source of confidence and
flow, I can feel the rippleeffects as I pour into other
people and give them thatempowerment.
So it's more than just touchingthem in the studio.
It's all about the rippleeffect of that experience and
how it affects everyone.
Absolutely yes.
(42:15):
Now, marie, before we wrap up,how can listeners connect with
you and learn more about whatyou do and to book a session or
just be in your space to learnmore?
Speaker 1 (42:29):
Well, of course, um, you can schedule a consultation
and we can talk onwwwbohemianvisionscom.
You can follow me on myFacebook and Instagram at
Bohemian Visions Photography.
My Facebook and Instagram atBohemian Visions Photography.
(42:54):
And yeah, everyone deserves toinvest in themselves, to feel
this level of confidence whereyou walk into the room and you
just shine.
I don't want every woman toexperience that, and they will.
Speaker 2 (43:03):
They will woman to experience that and they will.
They will With you, they will,all right.
So, everybody, if you don'thave a pen and paper, that's
okay.
If you look in the show notes,all Marie's information will be
there for you to connect withher.
All right, all right, you guys.
Until next time, my friends,namaste.
You know, one of the questions I ask is what would
you do with an extra boost ofconfidence?
And then, as I've kind ofdeveloped more and more into the
business, I've realized that agood majority of women are very
insecure.
They're very insecure abouttheir bodies, they're insecure
about their voice, they're veryinsecure about their sensuality,
their sexuality, and I wantBohemian Visions to be like a
(00:25):
therapy session where you havepictures that remind you that
you are that girl.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
Hey there, I'm Makita , a small town girl with big
dreams who started a podcastwith an old headset and a laptop
at my kitchen table and made mydreams come true.
On my podcast, time for Teawith Makita, we chat about
living life unapologetically, onyour terms, from career advice,
entrepreneurship, relationshipsand everything in between.
(00:52):
This is your one-stop shop forreal conversations and
inspiration.
If you're looking forconnection, then you've found it
here.
Join me every Tuesday as wedive into those sometimes hard
to have conversations.
So grab your cup of tea orcoffee and get comfy, because
this is time for Tea with Makita, and the tea is definitely hot.
(01:14):
Ever feel like you need asuperpower boost of motivation
with exclusive tips and toolswith your goals in mind?
Well, say hello to your newinspiration hotspot the Tuesday
Tea Newsletter, your weeklyinfusion of big thinking energy
that will propel you to chaseyour wildest dreams and never
shy away from using the power ofyour voice.
Sign up for the Tuesday TeaNewsletter today at
(01:36):
beautifullyunbalancedcom andelevate your goals to the next
level.
Welcome back everyone.
I'm Nikita.
I just want to thank you somuch for sharing your time, your
space and, of course, youramazing energy with me.
Today, this season, we're divinginto the theme of planting
seeds, exploring how small,intentional actions can lead to
(01:58):
powerful transformations in ourlives.
And today I'm so excited towelcome an extraordinary guest,
marie Malvinson.
Marie is a 20-year Army veteranturned entrepreneur and founder
of Bohemian Vision Studio.
It is a luxury Bordeauxphotography studio based in
(02:19):
Richmond, virginia, and I just Iwant y'all to understand
something Marie's work is notjust about photography.
She is a trailblazer, helpingwomen rediscover their
confidence and celebrate theirunique stories through the art
of boudoir.
(02:39):
Share not just her photographyand what she's doing to help
women transform their lives, butalso to share a little bit
about her transformation and howshe was able to step into that
power to help other people.
And I just want you to knowsomething else this is not just
physical, this is emotional,it's a spiritual shift, it's
(02:59):
that ripple far beyond theseason.
So I want you to grab your cupof tea, people.
I want you to settle in and getready for a conversation that
will help empower you, give youthe confidence and self-love
that you need to plant seeds fortomorrow.
Marie, thank you and welcome.
Speaker 1 (03:17):
Thank you so much.
Oh, my God, it was justeverything that you're saying
when I tell you I am obsessedwith you.
I'm obsessed with your pillars,your values and what you are
creating in regards to being abetter you, both mentally,
emotionally and physically, andI'm like yes, thank you so much.
(03:39):
I'm so honored and blessed tobe on your show.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
Well, thank you, and I just want people to know that
it's very humbling and veryamazing to have people like you
come on the show with so muchgenuine energy and just the
ability to want to help otherpeople, but also walk the walk,
been on the journey and want toshare it with other people, so
(04:06):
I'm just as excited to have you.
Yes, now, marie, let's start bytalking about your journey from
20 years in the army tofounding Bohemian Vision Studio
and planning for you to makesuch a bold transition, and I
planted that seed for you tomake such a bold transition.
Speaker 1 (04:25):
Of course, of course.
I joined the army in 1999.
So I was 17 years old and itwas homecoming week.
I was bumping heads really badin my household and me and my
(04:46):
mother did not see eye to eye onwhere I wanted to go after high
school.
And I remember just walkinginto the army recruiting station
and I was like I want to jointhe army.
And they're like what?
I got to get out of my mama'shouse and they're like how old
are you?
And I'm like I was 16.
And they're like, uh, when doyou turn 17?
(05:08):
I'm like September.
And they're like, okay, well,you have to.
Can you wait till you're 18?
No, I got to get out of mymama's house, so I had to do
some sales pitch because I hadto get a waiver and went through
the entire MEPS process,graduated from high school and a
month later I shipped off toFort Leonard Wood, missouri, for
(05:28):
basic training.
And I'll never forget the firstnight of the basic training.
I was like where did I getmyself into?
And I cried myself to sleep.
It was 4th of July, weekend,1999.
And I cried myself to sleep andI was like where did I get
myself into?
And my friends went off to go tocollege.
I wanted to go to college but Ididn't have the money to go to
college and I kind of slackedoff my senior years.
(05:50):
I was cutting class and I wasjust over it.
I was mentally checked out andI was like I should have went to
college.
Oh my God, oh my God.
And I was like this is not forme and I cried like I can't wait
to get out.
It's about to be a long threeyears.
And one thing led to another.
They sent me to Korea and mylife changed and they were like
hey, do you want to stay forlike another three years and
(06:12):
we'll pay you $14,000?
I'm like, well, I got nothingelse to do.
Sure, why not?
And every time I thought aboutgetting out, I was thinking can
you stay?
We'll give you some money.
I'm like, sure, why not?
And then, the entire time I wasin, I was taking college
courses and I was trying to bebetter.
And I remember this piece ofadvice that one of my
non-commissioned officers gaveme.
It was like leave with morethan what you came with.
(06:34):
So every time you go to a dutystation, if you came to a duty
station with no college, leavewith a little bit of college,
leave with a little bit of moneyin your pocket, leave with more
.
And it's not something likephysical and materialistic, but
leave with more knowledge, leavewith more experience, leave
with something that you can showfor.
(06:54):
And so I started doing that.
And then one of my mentors waslike you know what you should be
an officer.
And I'll never forget it wasjust like yesterday.
I was like I don't want to bean officer and I'll never forget
.
It was just like yesterday.
I was like, oh, I don't want tobe an officer.
They're lame, they don't haveany common sense, right?
I like being an NCO.
And he's like, no, we needofficers like you.
And I was like, okay, I'll doit.
And I went through the programand I finished my bachelor's
(07:18):
degree and I was like, okay.
So I went on to be a logisticsofficer.
And it was just like, challengeafter challenge after challenge,
and I'll never forget my firstdeployment to Iraq and I had one
of those self-catharticemotional experiences where,
growing up, I will put my issuesin a box and I'll just pile it
(07:40):
in a box, in a box constantly.
And then one thing led toanother, everything just
exploded.
Because when you're deployed,it's just you, your thoughts and
the mission.
And so when you're not onmission and you're not doing
work, you're just alone in yourthoughts in this like 40 foot
container that is your room thatyou're living in and there's no
privacy, and you're just likewhy am I feeling so emotional?
(08:01):
And I cried so much?
And it was just one of thosethings where it was like okay,
I've been battling demons andbattling a lot of issues that
I've just kind of been snuffingand shoving into the box, and
then the box finally explodedrediscover and find myself and
(08:26):
find my peace.
And I was still struggling withbalancing boundaries, knew
nothing about boundaries, and Iwas really struggling with
balancing motherhood and beingan army officer.
And then I got married.
So it was balancing being awife, being a mother, being an
officer.
And then, because I wasstruggling with juggling these
competing requirements, my ex atthe time was like you're not
(08:47):
giving me enough attention.
And then my son was just kindof withdrawn like oh, she's just
busy, she don't care about me.
And then my job was like weneed more and more and more.
And then it got to the pointwhere I'll never forget I was
just in tears because it waslike everyone was pulling at me
Take, take, take at me, take,take, take.
(09:08):
And so that was the one part inmy life where I felt like my
cup was bone dry, just bone dry.
Everyone was just take, take,take, and I had nothing for
myself and I fell into this deepdepression.
So I was depressed but I wasfunctioning like I had on this
mask that I always had a smileon my face, but if you saw
behind the smile, I was justdying on the inside.
And I remember sitting in mytruck in tears, wanting to just
(09:31):
escape, and I was going totherapy trying to unpack and
process my emotions and mytherapist was like, are you
suicidal?
I was like I'm not suicidal.
I feel like I fell in a holeand every time I try to climb
out of the hole, the hole justkept getting deeper and deeper.
And while it's getting deeper,it's because people were taking,
(09:51):
they were taking away from meand I could not breathe.
So I had a son who I could notbe present for.
I had a career that was justtoxic and demanding, had a
husband who was like you're notgiving me any attention and
you're not being there for me,wait, wait, wait.
And I was like I didn't sign upfor this marriage.
I didn't sign up to be a motherto a second child.
No, and I'll never forget.
(10:11):
I ended up having to havesurgery because I did not
realize, in hindsight is 2020,when you're dealing with a lot
of stress.
Stress manifests in a way whereI was suffering from chronic
pain.
My back would just lock up onme and I couldn't move.
And then, because I couldn't beas active as I was, I had
gained a lot of weight.
And then I was depressed to thepoint where I would sleep 12
(10:35):
hours on the weekends.
I could not wake up and it wasjust like oh my God, this is not
my life, this is not the lifethat I want.
Oh my God, this is not my life.
This is not the life that Iwant.
And then, after I had got backfrom leave sick leave they're
like hey, we got some news foryou.
You just came down on orders togo to Afghanistan.
I'm like I'll take it, I willtake it.
(10:55):
It's been seven years since Ihad a deployment.
I said I will take it.
So this was 2017.
And I'm just thinking to myself, you know what, even though I'm
dealing with the mission, letme go.
I go to Afghanistan.
Two weeks into the deployment Iwas like what did I sign up for?
And I was like this is about tobe a long year.
(11:17):
And that was the year I waslike let me focus on me, let me
focus on filling my cup.
So I started, I went on mission, I did my job.
When I wasn't doing my job, Ispent time in the gym and then I
started listening to audiobooks, and I'll never forget the
book how to Be a Badass by JenSincero.
(11:38):
And they were like loveyourself.
And this is the first time Ilearned boundaries.
I learned boundaries at 37years of age and they were like
don't be afraid to say no.
And it was the little things,because I was the type of person
I never said no and peoplewould just spring things at the
last minute.
And it was like take, take,take, take, take.
And I'll never forget.
Someone was like do you want tosign this card?
(12:00):
No, what?
I'm like.
I don't know this person.
No, well, do you want to go tothis farewell and put money into
this gift?
No, when I tell you, it was themost liberating feeling like oh
no, and it became my favoriteword no is a complete sentence.
(12:22):
No is a complete sentence.
It was the first time where Isaid no without offering any
explanation, no, without givingany excuses.
It was no, why not?
Because I said so.
No is a complete sentence andit was just the most cathartic,
liberating, freeing experienceever.
(12:42):
And so, when I got back fromAfghanistan, they're like what
are you going to do?
I am going to be Marie.
The whole time I was inAfghanistan, they were like what
do you want to do when you comeback home?
I said I'm going to retire.
They're like you look so young,you should stay long.
No, they're like well, what areyou going to do when you retire
?
I'm going to be Marie.
I am going to live my authenticself.
(13:03):
And people did not understandwhat I meant by that.
So I'm going to start living myauthentic self.
The whole time I was in thearmy, that was Captain Malvison
and then there was Marie.
They were always for it, butthe first time I am Marie.
I'm Marie the business owner,marie, the mom, marie, just
Marie.
And it's so freeing, it's soliberating and that was like the
(13:27):
best decision ever.
So 2020, I officially retiredwith 20 years and eight months,
and I don't regret it, I'm happy.
And while I was transitioning, Iwas like, well, what do you
want to do?
I said I want to do somethingthat makes me happy.
I don't want to work forsomeone else.
I want to do something thatmakes me happy.
I don't want to work forsomeone else, I want to do
something that brings me joy,something that will help inspire
(13:49):
other people.
And so I was like you know what?
I'm very good at photography.
I've been doing photography asa hobby.
It was just so relaxing and Iloved the art that I would
create and I was like I'm goingto go ahead and be a
professional photographer.
And you know, six years later,it's been like the best decision
ever and it's the mostrewarding aspect.
(14:10):
Like I was like you know what Iwould rather make $50,000 a
year doing something that bringsme joy than making $130,000 a
year that makes me miserable.
Speaker 2 (14:20):
I agree.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
Yes, and then the first thing that come out of my
mouth when I wake up in themorning is F this, f it versus.
You know what?
I'm hustling, I'm grinding, I'mmarketing my business, but the
reviews that I get where myclients are like thank you so
much for making me feel like agoddess.
Thank you so much for making mefeel so beautiful.
(14:42):
I never thought I could be thisbeautiful.
No amount of money in the worldcan replace that, and I love
what I do can replace that and Ilove what I do.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
I can definitely tell it seems like your whole
journey, from making thatdecision to join the Army, even
when there's moments when youhad those self-reflections, some
challenges, some struggles,some moments where you just had
to sit with it, it seems like itwas all preparing you for what
it would take to be theentrepreneur, to find yourself.
And through every journey,through every self-discovery, I
(15:19):
don't think sometimes we realizethat when we're in the journey,
that we are already becomingeverything that we don't even
know yet, like we're working onit, we're walking into it.
On it, we're walking into it,and you mentioned that you were
this.
Photography was something youjust love to do for relaxation
at one point, and then it becamelike a part of you.
(15:41):
Now how did you take thephotography and turn it into
something that empowered womenin such a way and turn it into
something that empowered womenin such a way.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
So it's interesting because one of the things like I
will give the Army credit foris my organizational skills.
Like I was an operationsofficer, I was a logistics
officer, I was a commander, Iknew how to manage people.
So I am actually a secondgeneration entrepreneur.
Like I come from a line ofentrepreneurs.
I just avoided it for thelongest because I saw how
difficult it was and the grind,but it was just one of those
things where I'm like you knowwhat I'm going to do.
(16:21):
This on my terms, I am going towork and do what makes me happy
.
Like I never want to seeanother PowerPoint presentation
for as long as I live PowerPointpresentation for as long as I
live.
And what ended up turning intoempowerment was that I was doing
some test shoots with an oldcoworker and she's like you're
so natural at it.
(16:41):
And I'm like you know, tiltyour head, smile, close your
eyes, do this.
And he's like, wow, you're sonatural, like I feel so
comfortable with you.
And boudoir ended up being ahappy accident.
I thought I was going to be ageneral photographer where I did
student photography, babies,maternity shoots, engagement
shoots and all that and Iremember I did one wedding and I
(17:04):
hated it with a passion.
I said, oh no, no, absolutelynot, I don't think so.
I left one high stress career.
I'm not going to start anotherone.
No Like, since I've retired, itis all about protecting my
peace.
Since being divorced, it's beenprotecting my peace.
(17:24):
It's my peace first andforemost.
Anything that disrupts my peace, you got to go.
So I always look at it as youare a guest in my ecosystem,
that's right.
You disrupt my ecosystem, youwill be immediately ejected.
You got to go.
So wedding photography was justnot my thing.
(17:45):
I said, okay, I need to figureout something.
So I went to this meetup groupwith other photographers.
I was like we're going to doboudoir, and at first I avoided
photographers.
I was like we're going to doboudoir and at first I avoided
it.
I was like I don't know, I'mnot sure, nudes, whatever.
And I just saw how creepy themale photographers were and I
was like wait, hold up.
And I remember this one malephotographer was telling the
model hey, can you get on yourhands and knees?
And where we were shooting at,the floor was unfinished.
(18:09):
And so the model, I'm glad,spoke up for herself.
She was like I'm not doing that.
I stepped in and was like, whatare you doing?
Because he was just like Icould see through his viewfinder
.
He was taking pictures of herin such an inappropriate way and
I'm like, whoa, time out, thisis not cool.
And then I remember asking herI was like, are you okay?
And she was like, yeah, I'mokay.
And I'm just like yo, this weneed to stop.
(18:31):
And, mind you, we're like mixedgender, so it was like women
and men, but I was the only onethat was speaking up, like yo,
let's not be creepy about this.
So I'm on YouTube and I ended upwatching this boudoir
photographer out in LA and he'smaking content.
I'm like, oh so this is whatboudoir is really about.
It's about empowerment, it'sabout women feeling good about
(18:52):
themselves.
And that's how I was like youknow what, let me take this
mastermind course.
And it just went from there andit has been the most rewarding.
I wished I would have stumbledinto boudoir when I was in my
twenties and thirties, reallyunderstanding how empowerment
works, really understanding how,when you love on yourself, when
(19:13):
you are protecting your peace,you know how to say no.
You know how to enforceboundaries.
People don't like that.
They don't like that.
Speaker 2 (19:23):
No, they do not.
When you understand and knowwho you are, it's a different
feeling and people understandthat energy, energy.
They just can't treat youanyway.
They can't say anything theywant to you like they.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
They really have to kind of step back and the people
that don't honor that willdefinitely stay out of your way
oh yeah, and you know peopletell me all the time they're
like you're so intimidating, youwere like no nonsense, straight
to the point, and it's likeit's it's a lot of being in the
military, but at the same timeit's like you're not going to
play my face.
And society is very conflictavoidant to a certain degree,
(20:00):
where I see it in my businessall the time, where people will
schedule a consult and then,instead of just canceling it,
they'll like ghost.
Or instead of saying hey, Ican't afford the services,
they'll just like not answer thephone, not pick up, or they'll
just completely ghost me and I'mlike, look man, I got more
important things to do to chaseafter you.
(20:20):
It's okay.
If you're not ready, you're notready.
There's no pressure becauseyou're investing in yourself and
this is a commitment.
Also, you're investing in beingthe better version of yourself.
You're investing in being theperson in your head that is
strong, that is confident.
One of the questions I ask iswhat would you do with an extra
(20:42):
boost of confidence?
And then, as I've developedmore and more into the business,
I've realized that a goodmajority of women are very
insecure.
They're very insecure abouttheir bodies.
They're insecure about veryinsecure.
They're very insecure abouttheir bodies, they're insecure
about their voice.
They're very insecure abouttheir sensuality, their
confidence, their sexuality.
They're so insecure that theydon't know how to communicate
(21:04):
with their partners like kiss mehere, touch me there, go slow,
go fast.
They're intimidated by that andI want Bohemian Visions to be
like a four and a half hourtherapy session where you have
pictures that remind you thatyou are that girl, you have that
sauce and you are the maincharacter in your book, in your
(21:25):
narrative.
Speaker 2 (21:28):
I love that.
Yeah, because you're right.
Like growing up, especially forme, my mom never talked about
like owning your sexuality.
You know you're not reallytaught to own it, to embrace it,
that it's okay to just leadwith that.
(21:50):
Yeah, if that's who you areLike, if you're honest, you
can't go wrong.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Oh yeah, absolutely, absolutely it's.
It's cathartic, like a lot ofmy clients are like.
I just want to be feminine.
I'm, I'm, you know, operatingin my masculine.
I want to know what it's liketo be feminine.
And one of the things that theydon't realize is when a woman
is operating in her masculineenergy is because either her
environment or the person thatis in her proximity is making
(22:21):
her unsafe.
It is a subconscious defensemechanism.
You are not safe because whenyou're in your masculine, you're
constantly on alert.
You're like charge, you're asoldier, right, that was me when
I was in the army.
I was constantly in mymasculine because my environment
was not safe.
I was emotionally unsafe.
(22:42):
I was, to a degree, physicallyunsafe, because when I say
physically, it meant I didn'ttrust anyone.
And because the military had asexual assault issue, I viewed
every man that I worked with asan op.
When I was deployed inAfghanistan, when I was deployed
in Iraq, I walked around withknives on me.
I was G'd up F around, if youwant to.
(23:05):
But, baby, let me tell yousomething.
Try me if you want to.
There will be physical evidencethat in a court of law, there
is no doubt something happened.
So I walked.
I mean, imagine walking aroundin this heightened state of
anxiety, right, you're not safe.
(23:25):
So when I tell women this,they're like, oh my God, I
didn't realize that I was likesomething in your environment is
making you unsafe.
This is why you're operating inyour masculine when you're
operating in your full feminine.
And it's interesting how peoplethey don't necessarily know how
to articulate the differencebetween masculine and feminine
energy.
Feminine energy is extremelycreative and fluid.
(23:46):
You're flowing, you are free,very, very free.
It's soft, kind of like air andwater, right, you're just
moving.
So if I had to sit there anddescribe the different elements
of masculine and feminine, thefeminine is water and air.
They move and they flow andthey either occupy the container
(24:07):
and then, if something's notright, they'll break free out of
it, and then masculine energyis earth and fire.
They're very constant, they'resteady.
Another example of feminine andmasculine is masculine energy is
the sun.
It's constant.
Feminine energy is the moon.
It goes in phases because it'sflowing.
(24:28):
You know, you have the fullmoon, you have the new moon, the
crescent and the waning, and sowe both occupy both energies.
It's just one is going to be alittle bit more dominant than
the other.
So since I started boudoirphotography, I'm more in my
feminine, and by me being in myfeminine, it allows me to be
extremely creative.
But there's going to be timeswhere I have to turn that off
(24:50):
and become a business woman andbe like okay.
So when I'm in my businesswoman mode, I'm in my masculine.
Okay, we're straight to thepoint.
It's not about emotions, it'snot about your feelings.
It's like look we, we got toget this done, and all that.
When you step into my studio,it's the feminine, it's how are
you feeling?
Let's, we are going to tap intoour emotions.
We're going to tap into ourbasal instincts and our basal
(25:12):
feelings and tap into what turnsyou on, what makes you feel
sexy, what are your fantasiesand everything else.
Speaker 2 (25:19):
And this is the first time in so long being in my 40s
where I've learned how tobalance it how you described
that feminine energy versus thatmasculine energy, because we
all kind of step into and out ofthat so many times.
But you're right, when you comein there, when you I don't care
(25:41):
what type of studio you walkinto you're already kind of a
little on edge because you don'tknow what to expect.
You have an idea, but yourguards are up and in that moment
you are vulnerable.
So, like stepping into aboudoir session, how do you help
(26:03):
people emotionally?
You know, settle that and be inthat emotion.
And it's also kind of spiritual, like you're sitting there and
you're like really absorbing whoyou are and who you want to
become in those, in those photos, so you can, like you said,
look back later and say I am allof those things.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
Yeah, no, that is an amazing question.
So my studio is a totalolfactory, total sensory
experience.
It's the scent, with thecandles and the plugins that I
have, where you smell the muskand the vanilla and it's very
sweet and it's very earthy atthe same time.
(26:46):
Then there's the ambiance.
You know how, whenever you'reabout to take a bath and you
light the candles and you dimthe lights, that's my entire
studio just dimming the lights.
When you step into a studio,it's about stripping down, both
literal and figurative.
You don't necessarily have totake your clothes off, but you
are stripping down to who isMarie, who is Makita?
(27:07):
Not the mom, not the wife, notthe business owner, who are you.
And that's when you get toreally tap in.
And then, when you step in, Iexpect my clients to be nervous.
They're like, oh, I'm sonervous.
I'm like I want you to benervous, you know, because it's
natural.
And it's normal because you're,you're stripping down in front
of me, you're being vulnerable.
And another thing aboutfeminine energy is the feminine
(27:29):
is about vulnerability andpeople are afraid of that, right
.
And so vulnerability isactually strength, because you
are bearing your soul, you arebearing your skin.
So when you step in and you seelike the satin and the fur
because it's also textural, youknow sensory feeling, where you
feel the satin, you feel thevelvet couch, you feel the fur
(27:53):
rug.
And then when you sit in theglam room, my team is like, hey,
how are you doing and how longhave you been thinking about it?
And we're just getting youcomfortable.
Then we turn the music on.
It's like what makes you feelgood?
What type of music do you liketo listen to?
So it's a complete, totalsensory experience where you're
going to be nervous.
And that's why my sessions area lot longer than the standard
(28:15):
industry, because I want to takemy time and I want you to feel
relaxed and you know what?
The most beautiful thing and itnever gets old with me is when
that light, something switches,where they're like okay, I got
this.
And they see the photos.
And I turn and I show them.
You know their photo Like Itake a couple of shots and I'm
like okay, close your eyes, turnyour head, cut your eyes at me,
(28:38):
lift your chin oh my God,that's me, I'm so pretty.
And then they're like okay, Igot this, we're good.
It is the most rewarding andbeautiful feeling in the world.
Speaker 2 (28:49):
Well, my music would definitely be some Janet Jackson
, I think.
Speaker 1 (28:53):
Oh yes, yes, Velvet Rope and Janet, yes.
Speaker 2 (28:59):
Yes, I'd definitely be tapping into my Janet era.
Speaker 1 (29:03):
Absolutely oh, tap in .
I've had clients that are likeI'm not taking my clothes off,
it's okay, it's okay.
And another thing is, while youare being vulnerable with me,
you're still in control.
So it's the little things likemay I touch you, may I adjust
you?
You still have control.
How are you feeling?
I feel good, I feel okay.
And then I have a fullyfunctional copper tub.
(29:26):
That's huge.
And sometimes my clients willhave the bath experience and I'm
like, okay, we'll take a coupleof shots and I'll just enjoy
this beautiful bathroom.
They're totally submerged andmy plus size clients are like
I've never been this covered up,like the water comes completely
covered.
They get to just sit back andthey relax and they're like I
wish I could have this bathroomyeah and they change and they're
(29:53):
like okay, I could be naked andI still keep them modest and
it's all about the art, and sothe studio is so artistic and
it's all about like turning youinto a work of art to say, wow,
that's me.
Speaker 2 (30:09):
I love that reminder and, for anyone that's listening
and they're like a littleunsure about embracing their own
confidence or trying somethingoutside of their comfort zone,
what advice would you give them?
Speaker 1 (30:25):
Can you repeat the question one more time?
My love.
Speaker 2 (30:57):
Sure, you know people are.
You know, and I've seen some ofmy friends like.
I had one friend that she tookthe whole boudoir experience and
I was like man, I understoodthat I could, but I was a little
unsure about embracing my ownconfidence, like stepping
outside of my comfort zone.
And now I'm 40, I really don't.
I don't have all of that.
That's what it is.
You grow into who you are, butwe all hit those different
phases in our lives at differenttimes.
So for anyone that they're like, I want to embrace it but I'm
(31:20):
not quite sure how do I stepinto that zone of saying just go
with it?
Like what advice would you givethem to say I would say think
about what's stopping you.
Speaker 1 (31:32):
You know, the number one reason most women want to do
it but that stops them is liketheir weight.
I was like sweetie, the weightdon't mean nothing.
What will take you six monthsin a gym, some shadow lighting
and some uncomfortable poseswill get you snatched Right.
I would say remember when youwere a child and you were
learning how to ride a bike forthe first time and you kept
(31:53):
falling and you were so scared.
And then, when you finally gotit and you were rolling, you're
like I got it.
I did it, I did it.
That's why I say do it scared.
The biggest confidence boosteris when you're scared and you're
terrified of something and youdo it.
I remember the first time Iwent rappelling I was scared and
(32:15):
terrified out of my mind.
Do I want to do it again?
No, but the fact that I did itit was like, oh my God, I did it
.
I did it.
And that is the biggestconfidence booster is what is
something that terrifies youPublic speaking, posing nude for
some art and then it's like, ohmy God, I did it.
Okay, we're good and it'sawesome.
(32:36):
And I said do it scared, likedon't let that hold you back.
And one of my favoritephilosophies since I've, since
my twenties do you want to bethe type of person that wish
they should have could have didit, or do you want to be the
person that did it?
Speaker 2 (32:53):
Hmm.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
If you were to die tomorrow?
Are you satisfied with the lifethat you live today?
Speaker 2 (33:03):
yeah, and that's the, that's the mentality I have
about everything that scares me.
But I'm like because if itscares me, then evidently, um,
it's moving me in the rightdirection because there's some
growth there.
There's definitely something Ineed to learn there.
And I take those scary momentsand I remind myself when I
(33:23):
happen like you did that, likeyou actually did, and if you did
that, like you actually did,and if you did that, you can do
anything.
And that's what I say about.
I'm afraid of heights, but I'mthe first one to be like we
should take a flight.
I am always like we should takea flight.
And then I'm like why did yousay that?
Speaker 1 (33:43):
The first time I went scuba diving, I was so
terrified.
I was like, oh my God, I did it.
And after it was done and I gotover my fear, I was like, oh my
God, I'm 40 meters underwaterand I'm swimming with the fish
and I'm scuba diving.
And then the next time, yeah, Iwant to go scuba diving again.
Or the first time I went jetskiing, it was like, oh my God,
(34:04):
let's do this.
Or crossing over a bridge withATV, it's a 100-foot drop and
I'm scared of heights.
And I'm like why do I always dothings with heights?
And when it's done, it's like,oh my God, I did it, I did it
and it's something that I dowith my son.
He's like are you scared?
He's like, yeah, I'm scared.
And then I was like I got you,I got you.
(34:25):
He's like, yeah, I'm scared.
And then I was like I got you,I got you.
He's like okay.
He's like do you trust me?
I trust you.
And he did it.
And I was like how's yourconfidence?
I can do it, let's do it.
And it's just, it's the samething with my clients.
It's like I understand you'rescared, but do you trust me?
(34:48):
I got you.
And then, towards the end ofthe sessions.
When they see their photos atthe end, it's like that's me.
That's my favorite expression.
I hear the most.
That's me, yeah it's awesome.
Speaker 2 (34:52):
I love the fact that you really take your time with
like getting to know the personbecause, like you said, even
though sometimes I think we walkinto situations we kind of
forget that we are still incontrol of what happens that
whole respect for saying can Itouch you, can I move you here?
(35:14):
You know, tell me what you like.
Like you, you have the perfectpersonality and a complete
warmth for like really bringingout the best in someone to show
up as their authentic self asthey go through their journey.
And to me, I think it's reallyall about going through the
(35:36):
journey and part of thatself-discovery is seeing
yourself in all the layers.
And, like you're saying, it'slike pulling back the layers and
seeing yourself in a way that Ithink, in a beautiful way that
you never dreamed possible, thatyou could see yourself.
Speaker 1 (35:53):
All right.
I remember working with a modeland she was so scared you know
she's not really a model per se.
I was like rebuilding myportfolio and my content chief
was like my sister wants to do aboudoir session and I was like,
okay, she's never modeledbefore.
I said that's okay, because sheis a exact archetype of my
(36:17):
client.
They've never modeled before.
And we did a session forHalloween and she was like, okay
, I'm scared.
I said I got you, boo, I gotyou.
And she's like this is soawesome.
And she cried and I was like Ijust want you to remember, when
you see your photos, you arethat girl and you have that
sauce.
So I called her back in to doanother session because I just
(36:38):
love the glam look, like mymakeup artist did, and since it
was a Halloween, I wanted to addher into my portfolio.
But I loved her Halloweenphotos so much because it was
the first time I created a brandnew set.
I call it the Courtyard.
It's just my favorite set andjust the way she was just really
stepping into her feminine andit was the first time she really
(37:01):
let go and she's really feelingherself.
I said you know, I'm going toput you in a gallery, she didn't
know when.
So the photos came in and Ihung her up in a gallery and she
was in the middle of doing herhair and makeup and I was like
you know what, call her downhere, it's just like she's not
done yet, it's okay.
It's okay Cause if she startscrying and you know, jojo, my
makeup artist can fix her makeup.
And what I did was I walked herbackwards and I was like you
(37:23):
remember when you first oh man,I don't want to cry.
You remember when you came intothe studio the first time, she
was like, yeah, and I was likeyou remember how you felt?
And she's like, yeah, and I waslike you remember what was
going through your mind and howscared you was.
And she was like, yeah, and I'mwalking her backwards.
And then I stopped her and Iturned her around and she saw
(37:45):
her portrait on the 30 by 40.
Oh Lord, a 30 by 40 canvas.
And she just broke down andcried and she's like that's me
and I'm so pretty.
And I'm like, yeah, this wasFriday too, so it was super
recent.
And she was like that's me.
And I'm like that's you, thatis you, you're in my gallery,
(38:08):
because I have a gallery on thefirst floor and I was like I
want you to know that you arethat girl and you are beautiful
and you are enough and don't,ever, ever, let anyone take
power from you to make you feelless, than to make you feel
worthy, to make you feel likeyou're not beautiful.
(38:28):
I want you to know, look atyour photos and know that you
are that girl.
And she cried and she's likethat's me and I'm on your wall
and I'm like, damn, that is you.
And it just reminded me of whyI do what I do.
I have this rule that I don'tcry on social media or in media,
but this is so powerful becauseit's like.
You know, I've had my clientscry, but to see her, I'm like
(38:52):
you are beautiful, we all knowyou're beautiful.
You just need to see thatyou're beautiful.
And it was like I'm like, oh,don't cry, I'm doing an Ariana
(39:17):
Grande thing, like I'm not doingit.
I'm not doing it.
I'm trying not to throw mymakeup because we're filming
content and just seeing the lookon her face this big 30 by 40
canvas wall art of her naked inthe courtyard just serving face
(39:42):
body, is tea and I'm like I dothis.
This is my passion, do thisBecause I want women to know
that you are that girl.
Never, ever give power tosomeone to be the author of your
story, your book.
You are the author of your bookand just seeing that was like
(40:05):
the most rewarding, and I thinkabout it and I'm like I love my
job and I never had this feelingbeing in the army.
You know, being in the army isgo go go and it's like being
present, being in the moment,and it's like I get paid to pour
into you, I get paid to fillyour cup.
(40:25):
It's deeper than the photos.
Speaker 2 (40:29):
To me, boudoir is about being enough.
You have to be present and youhave to be in the moment,
because you have to appreciateevery second of it, but to see
the end result, to really own itand say this is me, I'm enough,
I'm beautiful, I'm all of thosethings.
(40:51):
It's a feeling and it's atransformation that you can't
get anywhere else.
Speaker 1 (41:01):
It's the most rewarding feeling in the world
to help transform women whoexperienced something traumatic,
who's victimized, had theirpersonal space violated in the
worst way, and for them toreclaim their power yeah take it
back people thing.
It's like you are reclaimingyour power, you're reclaiming
(41:22):
who you are, and it's.
I can't ask for anything morerewarding than that.
Speaker 2 (41:31):
And they're doing it in the most vulnerable feminine
way of flow and energy thatripples out.
Because when you leave thereI'm sure every woman that leaves
that studio with suchempowerment they take that
energy and they spread it to thenext person, because that's how
(41:53):
empowerment is for me.
When I'm in that energy andthat source of confidence and
flow, I can feel the rippleeffects as I pour into other
people and give them thatempowerment.
So it's more than just touchingthem in the studio.
It's all about the rippleeffect of that experience and
how it affects everyone.
Absolutely yes.
(42:15):
Now, marie, before we wrap up,how can listeners connect with
you and learn more about whatyou do and to book a session or
just be in your space to learnmore?
Speaker 1 (42:29):
Well, of course, um, you can schedule a consultation
and we can talk onwwwbohemianvisionscom.
You can follow me on myFacebook and Instagram at
Bohemian Visions Photography.
My Facebook and Instagram atBohemian Visions Photography.
(42:54):
And yeah, everyone deserves toinvest in themselves, to feel
this level of confidence whereyou walk into the room and you
just shine.
I don't want every woman toexperience that, and they will.
Speaker 2 (43:03):
They will woman to experience that and they will.
They will With you, they will,all right.
So, everybody, if you don'thave a pen and paper, that's
okay.
If you look in the show notes,all Marie's information will be
there for you to connect withher.
All right, all right, you guys.
Until next time, my friends,namaste.
Popular Podcasts
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.
Therapy Gecko
An unlicensed lizard psychologist travels the universe talking to strangers about absolutely nothing. TO CALL THE GECKO: follow me on https://www.twitch.tv/lyleforever to get a notification for when I am taking calls. I am usually live Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays but lately a lot of other times too. I am a gecko.
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.