Quiet Power

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What if being less visible made you more effective? We explore how choosing to observe first can turn awkward small talk into meaningful connection, both at work and at home. By reading body language, timing, and tone before you jump in, you learn what people actually mean—not just what they say—so your first words land cleanly and your presence feels natural instead of forced.

I share how growing up quiet taught me to read the room and why that habit became a real advantage in business. We break down a simple sequence you can use anywhere: watch for two to five minutes, identify a few clear cues, then enter with a short, relevant contribution that matches the pace and mood. We also tackle the trust question head-on. Staying silent forever is off-putting; the key is balance. Observe to gather context, then give a piece of yourself to build reciprocity. That rhythm turns “networking” into genuine rapport and helps you avoid oversharing that makes conversations feel one-sided.

You’ll hear how to practice invisibility without being weird: people-watch without staring, scan group dynamics at family dinners, and use quick tells—eye contact, posture shifts, vocal energy—to know when to speak and when to wait. We connect these skills to everyday wins: smoother collaboration, fewer misreads, better timing, and relationships that feel earned rather than engineered. If you’re tired of pushing for visibility 24/7, try this quieter path to presence and influence. Subscribe, share with a friend who thrives on listening, and leave a review with your favorite body-language cue to watch for next week.

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Episode Transcript

SPEAKER_00 (00:01):
Welcome back to the Timeless Movement Podcast.
I'm your host, Alexander Laszlo.
And today is just me again.
We'll be talking aboutinvisibility.
I talked about it a little bitin last week's episode, but I
think it needs more explanationin its own episode.

(00:23):
And if you can, because I thinkif you do it right, it can be
almost of a superpower and canbe really helpful at times.
And I was talking about thiswith Johnny DeBrito over at
Sotheby's great agent, greatguy.
Go check him out.
But we were talking and he waslike, what do you do well?

(00:44):
What do you what's like asuperpower that you have?
Just, you know, try and help mefigure out what I'm good at and
what I can help other peoplewith.
And at first I didn't sayinvisibility, but as we kept
talking, it came to a pointwhere we were like just talking

(01:04):
about how to meet new people andconnect with people just
wherever we go.
And I was talking about like,yeah, you know, sometimes I can
just sit back, watch theconversation happen, and then
kind of infiltrate it almost andhave a more of a natural
approach, a natural meeting.
And he was like, Well, that's asuperpower right there, if you
can do it correctly.

(01:24):
And I was like, you know what,you're right.
That is, that could be a truehelp to my to connecting with
people and to my business.
So I wanted to just talk aboutthis on here.
And hopefully, my goal for thisepisode is under 30 minutes.
My target is 15 minutes, though.
So, you know, short to thepoint.

(01:45):
I hope all you guys arelistening to this.
This is not going to be a videoone.
This will only be listen only.
So, yeah, please listen, pleaselearn, and let's get into it.
So I would say probably around10th grade.
You know, I was more of aquieter guy.

(02:06):
I wasn't super vocal, super outthere.
And so, you know, I was a littlebit more quiet, a little bit
more to myself.
And over the years, it's helpedme because I'll look, I'll just
look and I'll see and I'llobserve.
And, you know, I'll see people'shabits, I'll see how they

(02:26):
interact with each other, I'llsee what they're talking about,
I'll hear it, I'll just allthose things, like what their
head, what they're not just whatthey're saying, but what their
eyes are saying, what their bodylanguage is saying, all of that.
So I want to, you know, kind ofimpart this onto you guys almost

(02:47):
to how you can do it yourselfand help yourself maybe connect
with more people, or maybeyou're like, well, I don't know
how I can just sit back and bequieter, whatever it may be.
I hope this can help you guys.
I'm not exactly sure how toexplain it, but I'll try my

(03:07):
best.
So I would say start by justkind of not over-sharing or
over-talking, but like kind ofjust sit back in conversations a
little bit and just startgradually sitting back a little
bit and kind of get in that way.

(03:30):
I mean, if you're alreadyquieter and you don't talk much,
this will be easier for you ifyou're but if you're more of an
extrovert and you're justtalking and talking and you love
having conversations, this mightbe a little bit harder for you.
But either way, I think it'svery helpful for either
introverts or extroverts,whatever you may be.
But you kind of sit back and letthe conversation happen and you

(03:55):
just watch the interaction.
And I do this all the time, youknow, at work, just in my daily
life, all of it.
And sometimes I'll see, youknow, people come up to other
people and be like, hey, how areyou doing?
And the other person is joyfuland responds uh excitedly and
happily.
And then sometimes someone go upjoyfully, and the other person

(04:16):
will be like, Yeah, I'm good.
And you can sometimes you cantell if they're having just a
bad day or if they just don'tlike the person, which I find so
interesting is you can just see,you know, the interactions
happening.
But since you're not talking,you can really focus on what
their body language is saying,what their eyes are saying, what
they're not saying, but thinkinginternally.

(04:39):
And I find it so interesting andso helpful in this business
world, it's really helped me aton because I can just look at
what people are doing, whatthey're saying, what they're not
saying, and kind of infiltrateit almost and nudge myself in
naturally and just you know,kind of become build the right,

(05:04):
build the relationship there.
And now you might be thinking,well, isn't that a little
dishonest?
You're building yourrelationship on lies or
whatever.
I I wouldn't say so.
You could think of it that wayif you really want to, but I I
wouldn't say it is like that.
I would say it's more of likeI'm doing research before

(05:29):
meeting you.
Because that's basically what itis.
You're just learning andobserving from what they're
doing so you can better interactwith them and better connect
with them.
And then also, I talked about alittle bit about a little bit
about it last week, where I sawan Instagram video about an

(05:51):
ex-CIA agent who was saying whyhe doesn't trust quiet people,
and it's for this exact reason.
He doesn't trust them becausewhen you're quiet and you
observe, you're gaininginformation and you're keeping
your information.
If you're always talking, you'regiving away information and not
really gaining any information.
And if you kind of do a mix ofboth, you're doing a mix of

(06:12):
both.
You're giving some information,you're retaining some
information.
But that's not really what I'msaying.
And that like you don't beuntrustworthy.
I the way I kind of do it islike first initial, I'm
observing for however long, liketwo, five minutes maybe, and

(06:37):
taking that information to helpme connect with them so that I'm
gaining the information, andthen I'm giving up some
information, you know, justsharing about my life, whatever
it may be, so that it I gain thetrust, so that I'm not just
sitting back watchingeverything, learning everything,

(06:57):
and not giving anything.
As every everyone says in thebusiness world, you can't get
anything with value withoutgiving anything of value.
And that that can be done in amultiple multitude of ways.
You know, you know, I'm gonnagive you a service, I'm gonna
give you a partnership, I'mgonna give you time, whatever it

(07:18):
may be.
That's not the focus of thisepisode, though.
But what I'm saying is likealmost kind of take yourself out
of the equation at first andthen bring yourself back in.
I find that very helpful becauseyou can then learn and see and
you know, just kind of learntheir habits, learn what they

(07:39):
like, what they don't like, andjust kind of have a better and
more natural interaction andconnection with them and build a
better relationship, I think.
Because if you're alwaystalking, you're not really
gaining information and it justkind of sounds like it's all
about you.
You're just like me, this, me,this, me, this, me, this, me,

(07:59):
this.
Even if you're not talking aboutyourself, that kind of is what
it comes across as.
So I think it's very importantto do a mix of both.
And then, yeah, I think it'sjust important to do a mix of
both.
Just kind of observe and alsoshare.

(08:19):
So you're getting as muchinformation as you're giving,
instead of giving all theinformation or getting all the
information and being eitherannoying or untrustworthy.
Yeah, I would challenge you guysto try this.
Just kind of just observe inconversations, you know, it

(08:41):
might be at the family dinnertable, just watching your
parents or family, whoever yourextended family might be that
you're having dinner with, justlook and observe and see how
everyone's interacting and justkind of watch their facial
expressions and not reallylisten on what they're saying,

(09:03):
but listen to what they're notsaying.
And then just kind of bring itinto the real world.
You can be wherever you want to.
You can also just kind of peoplewatch if you want to at first,
so you can bring it into yoursocial life of just going to the
grocery store while you're inline or grocery shopping or

(09:25):
whatever.
Just looking at people andseeing how they're interacting
and seeing how they're whatthey're saying, what they're not
saying.
But and don't be creepy aboutit.
Like don't just stare at themand stare them down like I'm
gonna hunt you or something.
Just kind of keep it natural andjust naturally observe and see

(09:48):
what is happening and seeingthat interactions.
And it's I would say it's gonnabe a little difficult at first,
unless you're used to beingquiet and seeing what's
happening around you, then it'sprobably gonna be easier for
you.
But if you're not, then it'sgonna be a little bit difficult.
So don't be hard on yourself oranything.

(10:08):
Just know that it takes time,takes some practice.
But I think it is so importantbecause everyone's talking about
visibility.
Don't underestimate visibility.
Don't, you know, listen topeople, hear people, whatever,
whatever.
I think invisibility has justreally been pushed under the rug
where it can really help people.

(10:29):
It can really help you learninteractions, so learn how to
interact with people, see, youknow, if some people are feeling
bad that day, or just kind ofread between the lines.
And not only can it help you inthe business world, but it can
also help you in the personalworld.
So that's all I really have tosay about that is just kind of

(10:52):
get out there and makeinvisibility or superpower
because that's one of thereal-world superpowers that we
can really have, is just kind oftake a step back and take
yourself out of the equation andwatch.
Yeah.
I think that's all I really hadto say.
I hope you guys really learnedsomething from this.

(11:12):
This is a short one, so I hopeyou guys really paid attention
and it's just not on in the caror just on.
I hope you guys really paidattention to this one.
I find it incredibly helpful.
I hope you guys do too.
My challenge you guys to try it.
Just try it out and see if youlike it.
If you don't, you don't have todo it.
But if you do, then I think it'sincredibly helpful, incredibly

(11:34):
useful.
So, yeah.
I'll see you guys next week.
And thank you for tuning in.
And I hope you really tooksomething out of this.
And I'll see you guys next week.