May 13, 2025 • 51 mins
In this episode, we dive into some of Reddit’s most hilarious and jaw dropping dating disasters. From online dating fails to shocking cheating confessions, these real stories from Reddit threads like AskReddit and Reddit Relationship Advice will have you laughing, cringing, and maybe even rethinking your next date.
If you're into Reddit stories, online dating chaos, cheating drama, and lost love chronicles, this episode has it all. We cover everything from awkward first dates to explosive breakups, straight from the wild world of Reddit. Whether you're a fan of girl podcasts, relationship commentary, or just love reacting to the madness of modern romance, you’re in for a treat.
Follow for weekly episodes featuring the most outrageous posts from AskReddit, Reddit family tales, and more relationship advice you probably shouldn’t follow.
CHAPTERS00:00 Intro 00:56 Dating Disaster 110:26 Dating Disaster 114:43 Dating Disaster 122:44 Dating Disaster 128:48 Dating Disaster 143:46 r/WhyDidThatHurt٩(＾◡＾)۶ WHERE TO FIND ME ! ! ! ٩(＾◡＾)۶彡໒(⊙ᴗ⊙)७彡 Linktreehttps://linktr.ee/tiredgato(づ ◕‿◕ )づ REDDIThttps://www.reddit.com/r/WhyDidThatHurt/٭(•﹏•)٭ INSTA https://www.instagram.com/tiredgato/(`°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥｀) REDDIT https://www.reddit.com/r/tiredgato/凸(⊙▂⊙✖ ) TIKTOK https://www.tiktok.com/@catchatradio(－‸ ლ) Join the SLEEPY SOCIETY! (FREE)(－‸ ლ)https://discord.gg/4Mrs236WFM=＾● ⋏ ●＾= SPOTIFY (FREE) https://open.spotify.com/show/7p5R4ZPY9q5k5khVJ7blYd?si=_sLBYcVxQeOlBV_-5zSZVw(づ ◕‿◕ )づ SPOTIFY SUBSCRIPTION ($3 FOR EXTRA WEEKLY EPISODE!)https://creators.spotify.com/pod/show/reddit-radio/subscribe(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻ TWITCHhttps://www.twitch.tv/tiredgato( =①ω①=) PATREON (FREE TIER WITH UPGRADES POSSIBLE!) (PENDING.............)
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:02):
Man from tender combed lice out of my hair as a first date.
Wow. True love really does come with
head scratching decisions. Let's read it.
Join me as I dive into the wild world of online dating
disasters, from awkward encounters to straight up
mistakes, and get ready to laugh, cringe, and maybe even
(00:25):
relate to these outrageous dating stories.
I really hope you don't. But sit back, relax, and let's
expose the most epic dating fails on Reddit's Let's Read it
Bestie Dating in the modern world.
(00:58):
It's a battlefield between mixedsignals, ghosting, awkward
silences, and people who bring their mom to the first dates.
True story. Anyways, we're navigating an
emotional obstacle course. Most people just want a good
connection, but things like miscommunication, nervousness,
and wildly different expectations can turn a normal
(01:18):
day into a total disaster. So today we're uncovering just
how hilariously wrong things cango.
One Reddit post at a time. A little back story.
I-25 female, am an assistant preschool teacher.
Unfortunately, lice is an occupational hazard.
I'm not just a filthy person. Thanks for clearing that up,
(01:39):
Opie. About a month ago I met a man on
Tinder. Yes, I know it's a cesspool.
We'll call him D 26 male. Funny enough, I had swiped on
him on accident because I dropped my phone.
He matched me and I didn't unmatched because his opening
line was funny. OK, kind of low expectations.
(02:01):
We talked online for a few weeksbefore deciding to meet in
person. On the day we were supposed to
have our first date, I discovered one of my darling
students gave me lice. I was freaking out.
I know he wasn't going to believe me and that he was just
going to think I was just blowing him off.
I'm sure he probably would be OKwith thinking that you're
(02:22):
blowing him off, Opie. Let's be real, it's tender.
I immediately tell him that I have to go to the store and get
lice treatment and that I need arain check on a date.
As expected he didn't believe meat first which is honestly so
valid and I couldn't blame him for it.
OK bestie, we we understand social cues and social
(02:44):
reactions. After I secure the lice
treatment I video called my bestfriend crying about it and in
her genius they tell me to offerto send him a picture of my raw
emotion with the lice treatment.Oh you're going to send a photo
of him crying? Like I think he only wants to
see you crying down there not not with lice treatment.
(03:09):
Y'all don't even know what each other's voices sound like.
Ioffer and Dee says sure let's see it.
As soon as this man saw that I was genuinely crying and holding
lice treatment he offered to come over and help me comb bugs
out of my hair. I asked my best friend what I
should do and they said I shouldobviously let him do it, so I
(03:30):
gave him my address. Apply the treatment to kill the
bugs. It needed to be on my head for a
while before starting the combing process and I met him
outside of my apartment complex to let him in.
He spent two hours combing bugs out of my hair.
I was just a girl he met on Tinder.
We hadn't even met in person before this.
We spent the whole time talking and joking and discussing our
(03:52):
interest. All of the normal first date
stuff. This man was meticulous.
He took his time and was so gentle and kind.
He didn't make me feel bad aboutit at all and even tried to make
light of the situation. By the time we were done dealing
with the lice and all the nonsense that goes with it,
bagging clothing and bedding, etcetera, it was nearly 10 and
(04:13):
the Mexican restaurant we were going to go was about to close
so we went to a different restaurant.
This man still wanted to take meto dinner after combing bugs out
of my hair. I I of course decided that he'd
already seen me at my worst so Iwasn't going to be shy about
eating and ordered a Guinness and a burger and I've been a
long day and I just wanted comfort food.
(04:33):
He, however, decided he still needed to impress me for some
reason and ordered a Guinness aswell.
Maybe he was tired of combing for two hours.
I don't. OK Opie, if that makes you feel
better. Anyways, even though he's a
light beer drinker and had nevereven tried it before.
OK never mind maybe I should just read the end of the
sentence. I ended up drinking 2 guinnesses
(04:56):
1 sip on his end because he hated it.
He told me I was impressive and that he's never actually had a
girl order what she wanted on a first date.
Wow. Not the fact that wait has he
had like a girl like have a lifetreatment on the first date?
It's the food that got him. It's the food that got to him
(05:18):
OK. He refused to let me pay.
I tried, given everything he'd done for me, and he asked if he
could see me again soon. We're going out again later this
week, probably to give him his lace treatment because he might
have accidentally got some in itin his hair since they were
doing all that at your apartment.
Just a heads up. So go ahead and go ahead and
(05:42):
purchase that extra box. Go ahead Opie.
OK, and we do have an update. Hold on, hold on updates.
Dee and I have been happily dating for a few weeks now.
We are officially and mutually exclusive.
I may have accidentally swiped on my forever with this one.
You probably shouldn't tell him that.
(06:03):
So far he has planned a couple of dates and happily gone on
dates I've planned. We've discussed things and have
similar life goals and beliefs. We just finished a Lord of the
Rings marathon a little while ago and couldn't be happier
taking a look at the comments wehave.
Top comment. You cherish this man.
He's one of the good ones. See the issue with this is that
(06:25):
this is a man. The ones that don't do this,
they're they're boys. OK, write that down.
Write that down. Bestie, another comment.
Do we all get an invite to the wedding live stream Reddit live
stream that on Reddit seven months ago seven months ago.
Let's take a look at O PS profile.
Let's see if we have any updateshold on hold on hold on let's
see let's see taking a look overview let's see think you
(06:52):
have edited to add an official update to my post.
My life feels like a ROM com right now, so that was the
update we read Let's see the second day we have a second date
update. We have a second date update.
Let's do it, let's do it, let's do it.
If I can even load it. Come on, let's go update #2 we
(07:18):
are official. He's the absolute kindest person
I have ever dated. I know it's a little early to
say this, but I might have accidentally swiped on my
forever with this one. Didn't they already say they're
exclusive? I mean, Oh well, I won't get mad
at somebody being so excited they repeat themselves,
nothing's wrong with that. But here we go.
(07:39):
I I, I introduced him to my friends and they both really
liked him. He took me to see Terror Fire 3
for my birthday, even though horror isn't necessarily his
favorite. We started reading Play DoH
together the other night and it was so much fun.
I love the classical works and so does he.
It was nice to have someone to bounce thoughts off of.
I promise to keep you guys updated.
(08:01):
It's so weird having this many people invested in my dating
life. I didn't expect it to blow up
like this. Oh my bad.
There's a different update. They updated it.
Weird. They put the original update on
the bottom. That was the second one we just
read. Let's read it, let's read it.
The second day was even better than the first.
We went to the Mexican restaurant that we were supposed
to go to to fit the first day inthe offer to do a second comb
(08:23):
through on my hair as a precaution while we watched a
movie. And they say Chevrolet is dead.
I was big free. Yippee.
We watched Mean Girls and he wasquoting the movie A Line Ahead
pretty well the entire time. I was quite entertained and
pleased that he likes chick flicks.
We discuss life goals, OK OK andpolitical stances and discovered
(08:46):
that we have similar world viewsand goals.
We also have a lot of shared interest.
My antisocial cat likes him too,which is a major green flag.
She doesn't just let anyone pet her, but she snuggled up to him
after he was finished combing through my hair.
He's very sweet and funny and I feel like I can actually have an
intelligent conversation with this man.
We're going to a pumpkin patch in haunted house this weekend
(09:10):
that is so adorable. And then underneath that update
was the post we just read like the actual story so wow.
OK, fantastic. OK, I'm going to say it.
Combing lies out of someone's hair on a first date?
That's not quirky, that's not romantic.
That's just bad timing. But for real, can we normalize
(09:31):
being normal on 1st dates again?Like, I get it, nerves are real.
You want to impress someone, butlet's not skip basic human
behavior. Present yourself as who you
actually are, not who you think they want.
But tired. Got to.
If I knew how to be my authenticself, I'd do it already.
OK, fair. Here's how you prep for it.
OK without it being a weird performance.
So one dress in something you feel comfortable and confident
(09:52):
in. If you can't breathe in the
outfit, neither can your personality. 2:00 you got to
remember. Pick a setting where you don't
feel out of place. Skip the fancy jazz bar if
you're a more dive bar with Fry's energy.
And Step 3, before you go, remind yourself this is a vibe
check, not a job interview. You're seeing if they match you,
not just the other way around. Being authentic is an easy, but
(10:15):
it is hot. Try it sometime.
Perfect in timing too. Hear that beeping?
Wow. Wow.
A little story for those findingit tough in the dating world
right now. This story comes from the
subreddit Ask a Woman Over 30 posted six months ago.
(10:36):
Let's read it. I've been seeing a lot of posts
lately about how tough the dating world is for women and I
just want to say I totally feel for you.
It's rough out there. I've dated over a decade with
nothing close to a relationship to show for it.
It got me thinking about something heartwarming recently,
and I don't really have anywhereelse to share this.
(10:58):
In the last two years, the only person who has ever lovingly and
shamelessly held my hand in public and brought me flowers
was my lesbian friends. I was not expecting it to go
that way. I did not think lesbians were
going to be brought up in this. Not that I have anything against
them, it's just wow, you would think that they would put that
in the title for click bait. OK, let's read it.
(11:21):
At the time I just come out of asituation ship that she didn't
even know about. She had just flown back into
town from overseas to visit and she came to support me at my
play. She held my hand, bought me a
drink, and even gave me a singlered rose.
Honestly, it made me feel so incredibly special.
You have no idea, we are only friends and she is not sexually
(11:44):
interested in me either. Goes to show that kind and
loving acts are really that easyand mean a lot.
Taking a look at the comments, this was such a lovely story.
Thank you for sharing it. Few things make me happier than
seeing woman support woman. I'm very glad you have such
wonderful friends in your life. And another saying, my oldest
(12:05):
friend died earlier this year and I had the realization that I
just lost one of the greatest lovers of my life.
She loved me more than any man ever has.
She was an incredible cheerleader, the best hype woman
who was so proud of me every time I achieve something in my
career. Anyways, thanks for sharing.
Love really is everywhere. OK, so Opie realized the most
(12:28):
love they've ever felt came fromtheir lesbian friend who wasn't
even attracted to them. And of course, she knew exactly
what to do. She's a woman who knows what
woman needs first hand. If a guy tried to comfort you
the same way, he'd bring over a six pack, order a pizza, and cue
up Halo with the boys to help you process your emotions.
But for real, the story hits because sometimes the deepest
(12:50):
love comes from friendship, not romance.
And yeah, it hurts when you realize someone you care for
can't love you back in the same way, but their presence still
shaped you. So if someone in your life makes
you feel seen, safe, and loved, tell them now.
Don't wait. People aren't mind readers and
you don't want to figure it out.Too late and not good with
(13:12):
words. Well, go ahead, send a voice
memo, write a sticky note, literally say, hey, I suck at
this, but you mean a lot to me. That's it.
That's the magic. And if you're here waiting for a
partner who treats you like yourbest friend, hold on timer, I'm
finishing this one out. If you're waiting for a partner
who treats you like your best friend does good, you should.
(13:35):
That's the goal, but you have tostart by being that kind of
partner yourself. Hey, don't swipe left on me like
one of your dating apps, OK? Also, clear your cache on that.
You thank yourself later when your phone stops lagging out.
And wow, you just watched me unravel multiple dating horror
(13:56):
stories and you're still not subscribed?
I mean, both of you. You mean to tell me you laughed,
cringed, and judged with me for free?
No. Like no comments, not even a
pity subscription. It costs $0.00 to support your
(14:16):
favorite chaotic narrator. Like I said, $0.00.
Go ahead, click the buttons. I'll wait.
Yeah, I'm judging you. I'm waiting.
OK, wow, thanks Bestie. Look at all that man.
You didn't really have to. I really appreciate the support,
(14:39):
man. OK, let's move on to more
disasters. Here's a pretty fun change of
pace. This is from Ask Reddit called
What's your worst date story? So for those that don't know,
Ask Reddit is basically a question and the answers are in
the comments. Isn't that awesome?
OK, let's read them one comment saying.
(15:03):
Wait, is that it? She said after looking up from
her phone for the first time allevening and realizing that we
had pulled up in front of her apartment.
The original plan included coffee, but I had a hunch that
it could drive her all the way home before she noticed.
And that's called being spatially aware and not being
(15:25):
spatially aware on both ends of the spectrum.
Another one saying I almost effed up even managing to go on
the date by getting super drunk the night before with some
friends and sending her a completely unintelligible series
of texts that I had no recollection recollection of
sending to her. Wow.
(15:47):
I woke up about lunchtime the next day and she had been trying
to call me as we were meant to be meeting at 2:00.
I rang her straight back and apologized profusely.
She was actually super cool about it, said we'd all been
there and if I still wanted to meet her she was on her way into
town. Amazing.
What a great person, giving me achance even though I'd been an
absolute nightmare. Best behavior today.
(16:09):
You'll suffer through the hangover as punishment and make
the effort she deserves. Had a shower, changed and necked
a couple of ibuprofen for the hangover and hopped on the bus
into town. These were a brand of ibuprofen
I've done taken before. Oh God.
And on the bus to town I startedgetting quite hot.
Probably just a hangover. Sweats, right?
(16:31):
I feel kind of itchy too on my chest.
Bros have an allergic reaction on public transportation.
Oh my God, people are probably just going to think he's a
tweaker. Oh no, maybe it's just from
drying a bit aggressively in my rush.
Get to the bar and meet her. You OK?
You look a bit red, she says. Yeah, sorry, been in a bit of a
rush. I reply, my voice scratchier
(16:52):
than I remember it being. Less than 10 minutes of
conversation later and my lips and eyelids feel like they're
swelling up. Bro, did you take lice?
Ibuprofen. I go to the toilet to discover
that under my shirt, my entire torso is covered in blotches.
Had to cut the date short and run to the pharmacy to buy some
antihistamines. I've been at the bar for 12
(17:15):
minutes. We had been speaking for three
months. I never spoke to her again.
Genuinely think my parting wordswere I think there's something
wrong with me. I still stand by these words
dude. I mean she sounded pretty open
and very understanding, but thenagain, those people that just
(17:36):
let things slide by because liketo be fair, we don't know if
like she was actually like cool with it.
But most times, most times people say it's good but then
they let it bottle up and then they explode because they don't
know how to set boundaries. So they can't even set
boundaries. Like with dating.
Imagine what their day-to-day life looks like.
Imagine what their work life looks like.
(17:57):
Do they bring that home? Like you see what I mean?
So at that same point, I think y'all both dodged a bullet
because, yeah, you don't need somebody that doesn't know
boundaries, and she doesn't needsomebody that's, I don't know,
an alcoholic. All right, one more story on
this thread. Back when Tender first came out,
I matched with and started talking to a girl who was in the
(18:18):
same city in Florida. I mean, it's Florida.
What? Dude, at this point I'm not
surprised about what happens from here.
She and I agreed to meet at a restaurant I have been to a few
times before. We had talked about it being her
and me, but when she arrived shewas dragging a kid with her
which she had never mentioned she had, let alone bringing him.
(18:38):
Like I said, not surprised it's Florida.
At that point I wouldn't be surprised if it was an alligator
on a leash. She sits down and almost
immediately gets on her phone tolargely ignore me and her kid.
I tried striking up a conversation but it was clear
she was not there for me at all.No OP, she was there because I
bet you the father was not paying her any of the any money.
(19:03):
Just a crazy wild accusation because why else would she be
there? She's on her phone.
So her kid and I started coloring on placemats, drawing
cartoon characters and things like that.
Food arrives, we all eat, and then she asked if she can order
another entree. I had no intention of paying for
food at this point so I said sure.
I get up to use the bathroom andgo see the waiter about the
(19:26):
check. I pay for my food and the kids
meal 'cause he and I were havinga pretty good time drawing
Minecraft characters. Round of applause.
Round of applause for OP. This dumb person could have had
an amazing partner and she was just so self-centered.
So self-centered, so egotistical.
(19:47):
Like, how are you going to ask for someone's time, not tell
somebody about the kid, which means that you know not to tell
somebody about that, and then not even interact with them.
OK. I stuck her with both her
entrees and her drinks and then bailed and blocked her on
everything. Top five, worst date for me.
Top five. What's the other four?
(20:08):
What's the other four? Oh my gosh.
See. I don't really have a yap
session to do about this one other than look at this person's
name. For my visual listeners, you
know what I'm looking at, but for my audio stemmers, the
username says Spank Bank Manager.
(20:32):
Brilliant. All righty, a fun one from the
community. Ask men titled men, what are
your most brutal online dating stories?
For me, I was talking to this beautiful woman.
She and I were having meaningfulconversations.
She has to FaceTime me so we FaceTime.
The moment I turn on my camera, she hangs up.
Immediately blocks me after seeing my face.
(20:55):
Brutal world man. Hey, at least she didn't wait
until she saw you in person because I bet you she probably
like even if the face passed. You know how these bitches are
these days. Probably weren't 6 foot but have
cried or or what if you were if you were 6 foot?
(21:16):
Even with the ugly face, them bitches still want that they do.
OK, Top comment went on a date where we agreed to meet up at
this popular sports bar known for their pizza and pasta, only
for her to reveal to me that she's starting her new vegan,
lactose free, gluten free, alcohol free diet for the whole
year. So yeah, it was a bit awkward.
(21:39):
Brother, it wasn't awkward. That was literally like every
red flag right there on a pedestal for you.
I I couldn't do pizza or pasta for out a year.
How? 95% of the time people look
worse in person. And another one saying she
studied psychology at university.
(21:59):
She thought it would be best to bring up my traumas and
childhood experiences on the first date in terms of getting
to know me. Oh man, I wonder how many people
she's hurt since five months ago.
Because that right there, she's only going to get somebody
that's so desperate for attention and understanding that
it's going to be some weird lovesituation of like therapist and
(22:24):
patients. That's not good.
That's called dragging your workinto your life and we don't want
that. You're not getting paid, bestie.
You're off the clock. Why?
Why let it live rent free? Just just drop it.
Here we have a 10 month old posttitled A Story about My Dating
(22:48):
Life. They're just venting, so let's
read it. Let's read it bestie.
Hey, I am a 21 year old male. I am from Egypt.
My first love experience was in middle school slash high school.
At that time everyone was datingbecause it was the trend back
then at Egypt and probably the rest of the world.
You got that right Opie. So I wanted to experience this
(23:10):
dating and I kind of chose the girl at random with the weird
standards like close to my height, has a cool name,
etcetera. Bro just wants to play the sums
at that point. OK.
We didn't even pass the talking stage as she told me.
I think I'm not ready to date anyone and I think we are too
young to date as dating is for people to get married.
Other than that, it's just wasting the time.
(23:32):
I really respected that point ofview and started really using it
my entire life. But less than a month later she
started dating my best friend and it did hurt a lot.
That's another good POV that youwere just offered there, so I
hope you caught on to that one OP.
The second experience was two tothree years after the first one
(23:52):
as I was young and had a bad first experience.
I have known the second experienced girl for more than
15 years but we never got close.Somehow we just started having
feelings for each other. I was worried at first but she
was so nice, good, cute, popularand really showed me how much
she cares and loves me or that what I thought.
After I confessed my love for her she told me she isn't ready
(24:15):
for a relationship and since then our friendly relationship
started fading slowly. Bro opiate quick little thing.
You can completely fix this by being extremely blunt quickly.
Or if you're not, you better be OK with people turning you down.
OK? Like come on, you're setting
yourself up. After my first two experiences,
(24:36):
I decided to focus on myself andimprove my life more.
Wow. It's almost like that's what
you're supposed to do before youget in a relationship.
During that time, I focused on my swimming, gym, diet, school,
etcetera. I became fairly attractive.
I got taller. I won competitions and qualified
for the nationals, got a scholarship in Spain.
I was succeeding at that time, achieving all mine and my family
(24:57):
goals, and I got a scholarship in America.
There I met my third experience.Oh boy, you get a little taste
of the American slice of life. I met her at work, but it took
me at least two months to start talking to her, not because I
was afraid, but because I was trying to deny my feelings for
her. Until that day came and I was
like, I will just ask for a number and go with the flow and
(25:19):
if it is meant to be, it is meant to be.
So I asked for her number and she gave it to me and there was
a connection between us, a connection I never felt before.
We were completing each other's.But as you guessed it, it didn't
work out as I didn't want to have intimacy as soon as in the
relationship. And after a week or something
she started dating another guy. OK at that point I started to
(25:42):
believe that love is like the lottery.
Some people just get lucky and win it will others just try hard
enough but never win. I don't know if I'm the problem
or my time didn't come yet but I'm just so tired from seeing
all the people around me change partners so quick and I'm just
looking at them and even sometimes giving them advices
like I'm an expert. But the truth is I just feel the
(26:03):
love from the movies and series and I have never been in a
relationship before and I don't think I'll be in one soon.
Even the girl that I started liking was giving me mixed
signals and just blocked me out of the blue.
OK I don't know why I decided towrite my story, maybe to feel
better or maybe to share the head and me with somebody.
But it made me feel better writing with my thoughts and
(26:23):
sharing it with people I know I may relate to.
And I am sorry if I made vocabulary mistakes.
Thanks. OK wait, let's see what Reddit's
saying about this because I havea feeling I know what they're
saying. I think he might be love
smothering or just have expectations that don't match
the hobbies, you know what I mean?
Like you find people through your hobbies and sometimes
(26:45):
people just aren't the normal cookie cutter expectations of
relations and hobbies, you know what I mean?
Like if somebody likes the arcade, they're going to like
gambling. You see what I mean?
OK, top comment. Come to Yamba for a response to
this hectic event. Well done.
And to still have hope to transcend above this, I reckon
(27:07):
it is time to shine. Do you?
What in the Hamlet did did Shakespeare write this?
Look after you, focus on you, dosome ooms, whatever that means.
Strengthening, fuel cleans. Do not bow down and out, you
know, no matter what language barrier, I I respect that
(27:29):
because it makes sense. The simpler the better, right?
Right. Let's go ahead and do a little
yap session. Let's do a little quick yap
session. So bro, you don't even know what
you want. You're going back and forth.
You want a girl that wants a date for marriage, but you don't
(27:54):
look for a girl that wants to date for marriage.
You fall for anybody that gives you attention.
You take forever to make a move.Two months, bro.
And then you get butter hurt that you don't give out.
Which you know, that's cool. You don't have to give out.
But if you see something from a different eye and you keep
(28:17):
finding that things keep ending the same way, you're the common
denominator, bucko. Look for people that are, I
don't know, hardcore religious or not working in the office and
talking to any guy. OK, OK, you need for your
(28:38):
expectations. Look for actual go to Christian
Mingle. Go to Christian Mingle.
OK, that that that's the end of the rant.
That's the end of the rant for that one.
OK, so here's a pretty interesting one.
It's back in the subreddit. Ask woman over 30.
Apparently they talk about dating a lot in that community
by the looks of it being the second story in the subreddit
(29:02):
titled Ladies who met the love of their life after years of
mediocre dates and knew pretty quickly it was their person.
Share your stories. Would love to hear some positive
stories. I30 female, have been dating for
a long time and even after two LTRS and several situation ships
and countless mandates, I've never really felt a strong
enough connection to know I wantto spend my life with someone.
(29:25):
I know love isn't always a fairytale and that relationships take
time to build, but I love hearing about couples who had
insane chemistry right off the bat that's only grown stronger
over time. Thanks all.
OK so we have a little thread comment thingy.
So each comment is their own little story or little hot take
or or whatever they want to do. It's the yap fest thread.
Top one saying I stopped hoping for movie love.
(29:48):
I instead thought about how great my life would be and what
kind of partner would walk that path with me.
Inserts success horns the 420 noscope Boo Boo, Boo, Boo Boo Boo.
That exactly right there that exactly right there.
Like that's it. Wrap it up, wrap up all the
dating subreddits. It's done.
That's it. That's it.
(30:09):
I mean, that's that's the answer.
I I don't know what else you want.
What else do you want? Someone to hold your hands and
jerk it for you, but that's it. Instead, think about how great
your life could be with or without a partner, and what kind
of partner would walk that path with me?
Too long, Didn't read Life is for you.
(30:32):
A partner is called a partner because partners.
You get what I mean? You get what I mean.
OK. This took out 95% of men as life
partners, which relieved a greatdeal of pressure.
And about online dating, I switched to only consider
meeting men, writing full sentences and carrying the
conversation with antidotes, relevant comments and questions.
(30:53):
Hey, and what about you guys went out?
And the quality of my dating experience really went up
dramatically. Yes, yes, this is communication
tells your soul. That's just how it is.
Like your communication style comes from your experiences and
how you were raised growing up, how you raised yourself growing
(31:15):
up. How you interact with yourself
is how you communicate with people.
And if you're saying, well, no, I talked to myself differently
than the way I talked to anotherperson, dumb motherfucker,
that's you deciding to do that. You were deciding to translate
it differently. You're not on.
No, you can no, no, no, no, no, no.
(31:36):
Yes, it's autopilot, but you're still the pilot.
It was your choice to be on idleautopilot.
Lord have mercy. Another comment.
We work together and we're friends.
I had a medical emergency and missed a day of work.
OK. When I came back he wasn't in
the office that day. A Co worker told me he was gone
(31:57):
for a week on vacation. I was so disappointed and
surprised because I missed this man.
I realized I had feelings. Then when he returned he told me
he also had ADVT in the past. That's the same medical
condition she suffered from earlier.
He was a lifeline during a scarytime.
I courted him for a couple of months unbeknownst to him.
(32:19):
Finally a Co worker tipped him off that I was sweet on him.
On my birthday he filled my office with hundreds of balloons
as a prank. Prank right?
I also knew when I had a chance.We've been together 11 years.
I love started as friendships and we're still best friends.
We're very lucky be friends withthem before.
(32:41):
Because if you're just looking for the Dick, that ain't going
to happen. That isn't going to happen.
Yes, it's very important in a relationship, but if that's all
you're looking for, that's all you get.
You want to look for a Dick head, you're going to get a Dick
head, if you get what I mean by that.
Another one, at 32, I met my husband at a bar.
(33:03):
He was really attractive so I came up to him to start a chat.
We had a lot of things in common.
Hobbies, cultural background, travel, stories.
We had a great time getting to know each other that night and
got each other's contacts following that night.
He really impressed me. He messaged consistently.
He remembered conversations and small details.
He planned dates, he wanted to see me and spend time with me.
(33:25):
He didn't play any games. He was consistent, kind,
empathetic, interested in getting to know me, interested
in building a life with me. Fast forward four months into
dating, the pandemic started. Oh God, did you guys have like a
love baby? OK, he came to pick up, we
stocked up on our essentials, went to his house and I never
left. He's a wonderful, stable, kind,
hard working man with good priorities and morals who really
(33:47):
cares about his family. So all this isn't a post about
crazy passion or love at first sight, it's one that I think is
a solid foundation for lifelong partnership.
Remember, a partnership is a relationship.
A relationship is anything from a family relationship, a a
partner relationship, a friendship, a Co worker like
relationship you you interactingwith them.
(34:10):
Every time you interact you are setting your foundation of how
you move on in the future with all future conversations with
them. It is the foundation and you are
the one that decides how you want to be treated and what you
expect. So if you are passive and you
don't want to say the things that you know you expect in the
(34:34):
future, brother, then don't complain and don't cry if it
starts going away where you already set it up to go that
way. They don't know.
They're not mind readers. And honestly, that's a huge
point of trying to figure out how to get away from people that
gaslight you, that are manipulators, that are
narcissists. Whatever trend that you find
(34:55):
yourself in, if you're in that situation and you feel like no
matter what you do, you just feel like you keep getting with
the wrong people, you're lettingyourself get with the wrong
people. OK, maybe change it up.
Go for somebody you don't usually go for like looks wise.
You don't always have to date the six foot tall dude.
(35:16):
You don't always have to date the dude that's in an accounting
job. Go for the one that's, I don't
know, like door dashing. I don't know.
I don't know what you're into, but it doesn't have to be what
you're into when it comes to their life.
You know what I mean? You're not playing Sims.
You can't just pick out exactly what job you want them to work,
(35:39):
what hair color they have, theirheights, their weights.
Don't be wrong, You're allowed to have boundaries.
But are those really boundaries,if they're an expectation of
massive qualities that they can technically control?
Because maybe you're like, I don't like that job, I don't
like the job. But you, you get what you get.
(36:02):
If you want somebody that's a security officer at a nightclub,
he's going to be around people that cheat a lot.
Guilt by association, honey. Not everybody's that strong to
not be what they're around. So that's what I mean by that.
Be smart. If it's a duck, it's a duck,
(36:25):
because if it cracks like a duck, it's could be a duck.
But how do we know? Is it worth the risk to figure
out? You know what I mean?
Be smarter, stop, get some help.OK so I wasn't going to read any
more from this thread but this is the last one.
OK this happened to me. I was in a healthy long term
(36:48):
relationship until I was 24. That ended because he wouldn't
stop partying with his coworkersand cheating on me.
And then I was in a another unhealthy long term relationship
from 25 to 28. You see why I wanted to read
this one because first of all, multiple times cheated.
OK honey first time OK I get it.Be like, OK, you can't do this.
(37:11):
These are my boundaries because you can do one or two things,
tell them goodbye, we're done. Or two, can't do that again or
I'm done right? Multiple times.
You're just showing through action that you don't care if he
cheats because if you cared, you'd leave.
That doesn't mean that your emotions that you feel towards
the action that someone did thatto you are invalid.
No, you're allowed to feel sad about that.
(37:33):
But why are you sad if you don'teven love yourself?
It's kind of kind of kind of ridiculous.
You see where I'm going with that bestie, OK.
But I had honestly emotionally checked out of that relationship
a year and a half before I endedit.
He was much older and became emotionally abusive because he
was insecure and it just wasn't working regardless because we
(37:55):
were in two very different places in life.
So newly single at 28 and never having had the opportunity to
really date, I went a little crazy on those dating apps.
Nothing wrong with that Queen. I had a lot of fun
conversations, many of which fizzled out and I went on a lot
of dates. Get tested friend.
(38:17):
More than 60? Yeah, get tested.
I found it really liberating. A few turned into second and
third dates and several men tried to pursue things further
with me, but I just wasn't really feeling it.
Good for you. This was an amazing learning
process for uop. I didn't want to end up in
another mediocre long term relationship.
Eventually I decided to quit theapps and I stopped dating.
I just kind of focused on myselfand worked a lot.
(38:40):
OK then at 29 I was bored, randomly redownloaded an app and
decided to meet someone I matched with.
I know this sounds silly, but from the first minute of meeting
him I knew he was going to be a very significant person in my
life. We spent five hours just talking
and it felt like 5 minutes. Curiosity and that, that's fun.
(39:04):
I'm excited. I'm excited to see where this
goes. We were immediately inseparable
and we have basically spent every day together since the
first day we met. OK, we kind of felt like that's
the point in talking our time when we just know it had been
seven years since that day and we are now married.
He's the brightest light I've ever felt and has never gotten
any dimmer. I feel terrible for the younger
(39:25):
versions of me who thought I'd never find him, and I really
hope everyone gets to experiencetheir version of it because it's
truly fucking magical. So it's out there, but you may
have to deal with some bullshit before you find it.
Beautiful story to end this all on almost like a full circle
wrap up moment. You will go through pain, right?
(39:46):
Like whatever, you know, like how you go to like TJ Maxx or
like Goodwill or Ross or whatever.
And you see those like silly little like home plaques like
home sweet home. And it's through pain is where
you find happiness or you have to experience pain to understand
what happiness means. You get what I mean with this.
(40:07):
It's unfortunately true. It really is.
Even though man, what a waste ofpains and wood and money because
honestly, Ross and TJ Maxx and all those are just like
landfills and just tricks peopleinto over consuming.
We can talk about that on another episode.
Anyways, This is why it's so important to if you find
(40:30):
yourself in a relationship that doesn't work, it happens to like
everyone, no matter if you were sexually with them or just a
friendship. People have their debuttles,
right? Right.
People know always get along. That's OK.
(40:50):
You're not always supposed to get along.
Nobody always gets along. There is always a situation
where people cannot see eye to eye.
That's normal. And if you are doubting me, then
someone's going to take horribleadvantage of you because of that
(41:10):
perspective, because if you think that that's normal,
they're going to get away with alot of things.
OK, So that that's that's a goodstep one on that one.
OK, It's OK though. So proud of you.
I'm just worried for you. But like right here, like you,
you'll find some bullshit beforeyou find it.
And there are younger versions of yourself.
(41:33):
Don't get me wrong, I kind of feel mentally stole a different
areas of my life, but with like the extra education that I've
got through each year. Because if you're not learning
each year at that point, why areyou?
What are you doing? Stop, stop, stop doing
scrolling. Stop been rotting because you
should be learning something every year and it's not learning
(41:55):
how to have a relationship so that you're not lonely.
It's more so learning how to make your own relationship with
yourself to share it with somebody.
Think of it like any arts or anyanything that you can create or
anything that you've you have a hobby of like like anybody know
these like little fidget things like this is awesome.
(42:17):
I want to show it to somebody I love and care about because I
want them to know more about me and more about what makes me
happy. And same goes for them.
I want them to come to me and show me things that make them
happy. And if you can't see that
either, then that can make you abad partner without realizing
(42:38):
it. And that's where I kind of on,
ironically, can plug something that means a lot to me.
I didn't think I was going to actually mention it on this
podcast episode. I was going to let it breathe
because I just made this Reddit community.
It's actually crazy. I swear.
This is not plans, but I did make a community called Why Did
(43:02):
That Hurt? And in the description, I wrote
a place to unpack emotional reactions and explore why things
hit harder than expected. This is a community to explore
the psychology behind big or small emotional reactions.
Why did that moment sting? Why did that comment stay with
you? Post your story, your thoughts,
(43:23):
and end with one question. Why did that hurt?
OK, let me pull this up. Let me pull this up.
Let me see if I can pull it up on Reddit real quick.
It might not show up because there's like no members.
I just made it. I haven't talked about it.
Why did that hurt let's see let's see communities yes it's
(43:47):
18 plus because it's talking about mental health because we
don't need people underage trying to self diagnose this
isn't Tumblr OK, so this is it right here.
We have two members Why did thathurt So let's go ahead and go
down. I want to go to the top one.
This is me by the way this is myReddit.
If you ever want to like send mea message or send me a post that
(44:10):
you really want to see read out and what my opinion or if you
have your own opinion, dude, send me that and write your,
your opinion. I would love to read that.
I'll, I'll do a little segment about that.
I'm, I'm so serious about that too, by the way.
But welcome. Let's unpack together.
Bestie. Have you ever had a moment where
someone said or did something small, but it hit way harder
(44:30):
than you expected? Maybe it was a joke, a glance, a
forgotten text, or a harmless comments and for some reason
it's stuck with you. This subreddit is here to
explore those emotions. Not to judge, but to ask why did
it hurt? This is a space for exploring
emotional reactions, understanding how background
(44:51):
shapes perception, reflecting onthe psychology behind small or
big interpersonal moments, Talking about pain without
needing a clear villain. No blame game you want to figure
out, right? So if you want to post on this,
absolutely would love you to. I'll go ahead and update my
social media links in the description and include this.
(45:12):
You can tell the story, describea situation, or even just share
a passing comment that stuck with you and your post with the
question, why did that hurt? Others will reflect with you,
not fix, not judge, just help you explore, be kind, be
curious, be reflective. Welcome home bestie.
(45:33):
Let's get in touch with ourselves.
Talk to you soon. OK, so let's go back to that
Reddit page. I'm not in the Beanie Baby
subreddit. You're in the Beanie Baby sub
for my audio summers. I like Beanie Babies.
OK, so we do have some rules. So there's a couple threads out
here that if you want to put a comment to them, we'll get there
(45:55):
in a second. But let me see if I have the
rules out. Let me see if I have the rules.
I'm not really quite sure. Let's see.
Let's see. All right here, here's the rules
or six simple rules. OK, one reflect don't rants.
OK, this is not am I the asshole?
This is not whatever because a lot of them are just like they
just want to rant or like vent and like don't be wrong.
(46:18):
That's normal, but that's not here.
Like go over to the other ones. This isn't for that, because
then you get the stupid ass postwhere it's very clearly brother,
you're not the asshole. Like stop just trying to like
get attention just get a fuckingjournal.
Anyways this is uneventing subreddit post should aim to
explore emotional responses, notjust offload frustration or seek
(46:39):
validation. 2 no self diagnosis.Did you hear me back there in
the corner? No self diagnosis.
This creates a world of enablingand we don't want that.
You can discuss psychology and emotion.
You can't tell a Reddit user I eat.
Dude, these are I didn't know. OK, so when I wrote this I was
just joking, but these are actual Oh my gosh for OK so I'm
(47:05):
reading it right now and it's a hyperlink to the user.
I was just making a joke OK and it I didn't know there was
actually Reddit users that have this name OK anyway you can't
tell Reddit user I eat ass that they're dealing with a
narcissist or user bugs are on me that they're schizo.
You can instead offer definitions with clinical
examples to show traits of diagnosis for those that don't
(47:28):
know medical or don't know what the fuck I just said.
Don't say oh your mom's just a narcissist bro you're good.
Say oh your mom my your mom is showing signs of of a
personality disorder or or be asblunt like your mom might be a
narcissist and This is why And provide evidence from the
(47:49):
original post. God damn don't just make
assumptions. Clinically based.
OK, OK #3 why not what we're here to unpack why something
hurt. Make sure you post invites
reflection, not just storytelling.
Go to Emma the asshole for that one.
(48:11):
Or overreacting whatever. 4 no low effort or meme post.
Post must be meaningful and opento reflection.
No memes, screenshots without context or joke post Duh.
I have to put that because then people are going to be like Boo
Hoo crybaby when they wonder whytheir their bullshit went down.
Like no karma farming here bitches. 5 Respect privacy, blur
(48:35):
names and identifying details Ifyou're sharing a personal story
involving others. You also wouldn't think I would
have to put this but you know people are dumb these days. 6 Be
kind always. I just said people are dumb and
you know, you can, you can be kind.
Hold on, this is important. So let me read this.
But that doesn't mean Sugarcoat thinks this is a space for
(48:56):
reflection and vulnerability. You can call somebody dumb if
they're dumb. There's nothing wrong with that,
right? Like there's nothing wrong with
that, but you have to say why they're dumb.
This is a community where we need to be more situationally,
culturally self where you have to put it's, it's called a
(49:17):
holistic view. Holistic means like everything.
So like the, the house, the living situation, what's their
food situation? It's, it's the hierarchy of
needs. You can look that up.
It's it talks about like housingfinancial, what's their job look
like? What's their day-to-day?
How do they take care of themselves?
You have to consider all this because they do that for a
(49:39):
reason. Human beings react to anything
based on how they've already seen the world.
It's why pain can never be studied appropriately in a way
where everything's like on an equal field.
Because not everybody sees pain the same way.
The same way people don't have the same definition for sadness,
people don't have the same definition for happiness.
(50:00):
One person's goal is something completely different than
another goal. We're all on different areas of
the board. It's so fun, so fun when you
view the world like this, right?OK, and you can message me here.
Here I am for my audio stummers.It's Leah's tired tired Gato on
Reddit and the subreddit again is called Why did that hurt?
(50:24):
Excited to see you over there. Really wasn't expecting to talk
about this. Another day, another dating
disaster survived. Whether you're single, taken or
just here for the chaos, thanks for joining me in this cringe
filled corner of the Internet. Whatever you want to call it.
(50:45):
But if you laughed, cringed or side eyed your screen at any
point, don't forget to hit that subscribe button bestie.
Follow me on all the socials, maybe like Instagram, TikTok X
Twitter, whatever you want to call it and whatever else I'm
over sharing my opinions on. We call it the Yapfest.
(51:05):
There's a reason I give myself a60 second timer.
And yet these videos still turn out like over 45 minutes.
Anyways, and let's keep the chaotic energy going.
Links are in the description below.
And until next time, may your dates be less disastrous.
Maybe, Who knows. That kind of takes away from the
(51:26):
fun. OK, and your Reddit scrolls be
even messier. Bye bestie.
You have been listening to Reddit radio.
Catch you on the next frequency.
Man from tender combed lice out of my hair as a first date.
Wow. True love really does come with
head scratching decisions. Let's read it.
Join me as I dive into the wild world of online dating
disasters, from awkward encounters to straight up
mistakes, and get ready to laugh, cringe, and maybe even
(00:25):
relate to these outrageous dating stories.
I really hope you don't. But sit back, relax, and let's
expose the most epic dating fails on Reddit's Let's Read it
Bestie Dating in the modern world.
(00:58):
It's a battlefield between mixedsignals, ghosting, awkward
silences, and people who bring their mom to the first dates.
True story. Anyways, we're navigating an
emotional obstacle course. Most people just want a good
connection, but things like miscommunication, nervousness,
and wildly different expectations can turn a normal
(01:18):
day into a total disaster. So today we're uncovering just
how hilariously wrong things cango.
One Reddit post at a time. A little back story.
I-25 female, am an assistant preschool teacher.
Unfortunately, lice is an occupational hazard.
I'm not just a filthy person. Thanks for clearing that up,
(01:39):
Opie. About a month ago I met a man on
Tinder. Yes, I know it's a cesspool.
We'll call him D 26 male. Funny enough, I had swiped on
him on accident because I dropped my phone.
He matched me and I didn't unmatched because his opening
line was funny. OK, kind of low expectations.
(02:01):
We talked online for a few weeksbefore deciding to meet in
person. On the day we were supposed to
have our first date, I discovered one of my darling
students gave me lice. I was freaking out.
I know he wasn't going to believe me and that he was just
going to think I was just blowing him off.
I'm sure he probably would be OKwith thinking that you're
(02:22):
blowing him off, Opie. Let's be real, it's tender.
I immediately tell him that I have to go to the store and get
lice treatment and that I need arain check on a date.
As expected he didn't believe meat first which is honestly so
valid and I couldn't blame him for it.
OK bestie, we we understand social cues and social
(02:44):
reactions. After I secure the lice
treatment I video called my bestfriend crying about it and in
her genius they tell me to offerto send him a picture of my raw
emotion with the lice treatment.Oh you're going to send a photo
of him crying? Like I think he only wants to
see you crying down there not not with lice treatment.
(03:09):
Y'all don't even know what each other's voices sound like.
Ioffer and Dee says sure let's see it.
As soon as this man saw that I was genuinely crying and holding
lice treatment he offered to come over and help me comb bugs
out of my hair. I asked my best friend what I
should do and they said I shouldobviously let him do it, so I
(03:30):
gave him my address. Apply the treatment to kill the
bugs. It needed to be on my head for a
while before starting the combing process and I met him
outside of my apartment complex to let him in.
He spent two hours combing bugs out of my hair.
I was just a girl he met on Tinder.
We hadn't even met in person before this.
We spent the whole time talking and joking and discussing our
(03:52):
interest. All of the normal first date
stuff. This man was meticulous.
He took his time and was so gentle and kind.
He didn't make me feel bad aboutit at all and even tried to make
light of the situation. By the time we were done dealing
with the lice and all the nonsense that goes with it,
bagging clothing and bedding, etcetera, it was nearly 10 and
(04:13):
the Mexican restaurant we were going to go was about to close
so we went to a different restaurant.
This man still wanted to take meto dinner after combing bugs out
of my hair. I I of course decided that he'd
already seen me at my worst so Iwasn't going to be shy about
eating and ordered a Guinness and a burger and I've been a
long day and I just wanted comfort food.
(04:33):
He, however, decided he still needed to impress me for some
reason and ordered a Guinness aswell.
Maybe he was tired of combing for two hours.
I don't. OK Opie, if that makes you feel
better. Anyways, even though he's a
light beer drinker and had nevereven tried it before.
OK never mind maybe I should just read the end of the
sentence. I ended up drinking 2 guinnesses
(04:56):
1 sip on his end because he hated it.
He told me I was impressive and that he's never actually had a
girl order what she wanted on a first date.
Wow. Not the fact that wait has he
had like a girl like have a lifetreatment on the first date?
It's the food that got him. It's the food that got to him
(05:18):
OK. He refused to let me pay.
I tried, given everything he'd done for me, and he asked if he
could see me again soon. We're going out again later this
week, probably to give him his lace treatment because he might
have accidentally got some in itin his hair since they were
doing all that at your apartment.
Just a heads up. So go ahead and go ahead and
(05:42):
purchase that extra box. Go ahead Opie.
OK, and we do have an update. Hold on, hold on updates.
Dee and I have been happily dating for a few weeks now.
We are officially and mutually exclusive.
I may have accidentally swiped on my forever with this one.
You probably shouldn't tell him that.
(06:03):
So far he has planned a couple of dates and happily gone on
dates I've planned. We've discussed things and have
similar life goals and beliefs. We just finished a Lord of the
Rings marathon a little while ago and couldn't be happier
taking a look at the comments wehave.
Top comment. You cherish this man.
He's one of the good ones. See the issue with this is that
(06:25):
this is a man. The ones that don't do this,
they're they're boys. OK, write that down.
Write that down. Bestie, another comment.
Do we all get an invite to the wedding live stream Reddit live
stream that on Reddit seven months ago seven months ago.
Let's take a look at O PS profile.
Let's see if we have any updateshold on hold on hold on let's
see let's see taking a look overview let's see think you
(06:52):
have edited to add an official update to my post.
My life feels like a ROM com right now, so that was the
update we read Let's see the second day we have a second date
update. We have a second date update.
Let's do it, let's do it, let's do it.
If I can even load it. Come on, let's go update #2 we
(07:18):
are official. He's the absolute kindest person
I have ever dated. I know it's a little early to
say this, but I might have accidentally swiped on my
forever with this one. Didn't they already say they're
exclusive? I mean, Oh well, I won't get mad
at somebody being so excited they repeat themselves,
nothing's wrong with that. But here we go.
(07:39):
I I, I introduced him to my friends and they both really
liked him. He took me to see Terror Fire 3
for my birthday, even though horror isn't necessarily his
favorite. We started reading Play DoH
together the other night and it was so much fun.
I love the classical works and so does he.
It was nice to have someone to bounce thoughts off of.
I promise to keep you guys updated.
(08:01):
It's so weird having this many people invested in my dating
life. I didn't expect it to blow up
like this. Oh my bad.
There's a different update. They updated it.
Weird. They put the original update on
the bottom. That was the second one we just
read. Let's read it, let's read it.
The second day was even better than the first.
We went to the Mexican restaurant that we were supposed
to go to to fit the first day inthe offer to do a second comb
(08:23):
through on my hair as a precaution while we watched a
movie. And they say Chevrolet is dead.
I was big free. Yippee.
We watched Mean Girls and he wasquoting the movie A Line Ahead
pretty well the entire time. I was quite entertained and
pleased that he likes chick flicks.
We discuss life goals, OK OK andpolitical stances and discovered
(08:46):
that we have similar world viewsand goals.
We also have a lot of shared interest.
My antisocial cat likes him too,which is a major green flag.
She doesn't just let anyone pet her, but she snuggled up to him
after he was finished combing through my hair.
He's very sweet and funny and I feel like I can actually have an
intelligent conversation with this man.
We're going to a pumpkin patch in haunted house this weekend
(09:10):
that is so adorable. And then underneath that update
was the post we just read like the actual story so wow.
OK, fantastic. OK, I'm going to say it.
Combing lies out of someone's hair on a first date?
That's not quirky, that's not romantic.
That's just bad timing. But for real, can we normalize
(09:31):
being normal on 1st dates again?Like, I get it, nerves are real.
You want to impress someone, butlet's not skip basic human
behavior. Present yourself as who you
actually are, not who you think they want.
But tired. Got to.
If I knew how to be my authenticself, I'd do it already.
OK, fair. Here's how you prep for it.
OK without it being a weird performance.
So one dress in something you feel comfortable and confident
(09:52):
in. If you can't breathe in the
outfit, neither can your personality. 2:00 you got to
remember. Pick a setting where you don't
feel out of place. Skip the fancy jazz bar if
you're a more dive bar with Fry's energy.
And Step 3, before you go, remind yourself this is a vibe
check, not a job interview. You're seeing if they match you,
not just the other way around. Being authentic is an easy, but
(10:15):
it is hot. Try it sometime.
Perfect in timing too. Hear that beeping?
Wow. Wow.
A little story for those findingit tough in the dating world
right now. This story comes from the
subreddit Ask a Woman Over 30 posted six months ago.
(10:36):
Let's read it. I've been seeing a lot of posts
lately about how tough the dating world is for women and I
just want to say I totally feel for you.
It's rough out there. I've dated over a decade with
nothing close to a relationship to show for it.
It got me thinking about something heartwarming recently,
and I don't really have anywhereelse to share this.
(10:58):
In the last two years, the only person who has ever lovingly and
shamelessly held my hand in public and brought me flowers
was my lesbian friends. I was not expecting it to go
that way. I did not think lesbians were
going to be brought up in this. Not that I have anything against
them, it's just wow, you would think that they would put that
in the title for click bait. OK, let's read it.
(11:21):
At the time I just come out of asituation ship that she didn't
even know about. She had just flown back into
town from overseas to visit and she came to support me at my
play. She held my hand, bought me a
drink, and even gave me a singlered rose.
Honestly, it made me feel so incredibly special.
You have no idea, we are only friends and she is not sexually
(11:44):
interested in me either. Goes to show that kind and
loving acts are really that easyand mean a lot.
Taking a look at the comments, this was such a lovely story.
Thank you for sharing it. Few things make me happier than
seeing woman support woman. I'm very glad you have such
wonderful friends in your life. And another saying, my oldest
(12:05):
friend died earlier this year and I had the realization that I
just lost one of the greatest lovers of my life.
She loved me more than any man ever has.
She was an incredible cheerleader, the best hype woman
who was so proud of me every time I achieve something in my
career. Anyways, thanks for sharing.
Love really is everywhere. OK, so Opie realized the most
(12:28):
love they've ever felt came fromtheir lesbian friend who wasn't
even attracted to them. And of course, she knew exactly
what to do. She's a woman who knows what
woman needs first hand. If a guy tried to comfort you
the same way, he'd bring over a six pack, order a pizza, and cue
up Halo with the boys to help you process your emotions.
But for real, the story hits because sometimes the deepest
(12:50):
love comes from friendship, not romance.
And yeah, it hurts when you realize someone you care for
can't love you back in the same way, but their presence still
shaped you. So if someone in your life makes
you feel seen, safe, and loved, tell them now.
Don't wait. People aren't mind readers and
you don't want to figure it out.Too late and not good with
(13:12):
words. Well, go ahead, send a voice
memo, write a sticky note, literally say, hey, I suck at
this, but you mean a lot to me. That's it.
That's the magic. And if you're here waiting for a
partner who treats you like yourbest friend, hold on timer, I'm
finishing this one out. If you're waiting for a partner
who treats you like your best friend does good, you should.
(13:35):
That's the goal, but you have tostart by being that kind of
partner yourself. Hey, don't swipe left on me like
one of your dating apps, OK? Also, clear your cache on that.
You thank yourself later when your phone stops lagging out.
And wow, you just watched me unravel multiple dating horror
(13:56):
stories and you're still not subscribed?
I mean, both of you. You mean to tell me you laughed,
cringed, and judged with me for free?
No. Like no comments, not even a
pity subscription. It costs $0.00 to support your
(14:16):
favorite chaotic narrator. Like I said, $0.00.
Go ahead, click the buttons. I'll wait.
Yeah, I'm judging you. I'm waiting.
OK, wow, thanks Bestie. Look at all that man.
You didn't really have to. I really appreciate the support,
(14:39):
man. OK, let's move on to more
disasters. Here's a pretty fun change of
pace. This is from Ask Reddit called
What's your worst date story? So for those that don't know,
Ask Reddit is basically a question and the answers are in
the comments. Isn't that awesome?
OK, let's read them one comment saying.
(15:03):
Wait, is that it? She said after looking up from
her phone for the first time allevening and realizing that we
had pulled up in front of her apartment.
The original plan included coffee, but I had a hunch that
it could drive her all the way home before she noticed.
And that's called being spatially aware and not being
(15:25):
spatially aware on both ends of the spectrum.
Another one saying I almost effed up even managing to go on
the date by getting super drunk the night before with some
friends and sending her a completely unintelligible series
of texts that I had no recollection recollection of
sending to her. Wow.
(15:47):
I woke up about lunchtime the next day and she had been trying
to call me as we were meant to be meeting at 2:00.
I rang her straight back and apologized profusely.
She was actually super cool about it, said we'd all been
there and if I still wanted to meet her she was on her way into
town. Amazing.
What a great person, giving me achance even though I'd been an
absolute nightmare. Best behavior today.
(16:09):
You'll suffer through the hangover as punishment and make
the effort she deserves. Had a shower, changed and necked
a couple of ibuprofen for the hangover and hopped on the bus
into town. These were a brand of ibuprofen
I've done taken before. Oh God.
And on the bus to town I startedgetting quite hot.
Probably just a hangover. Sweats, right?
(16:31):
I feel kind of itchy too on my chest.
Bros have an allergic reaction on public transportation.
Oh my God, people are probably just going to think he's a
tweaker. Oh no, maybe it's just from
drying a bit aggressively in my rush.
Get to the bar and meet her. You OK?
You look a bit red, she says. Yeah, sorry, been in a bit of a
rush. I reply, my voice scratchier
(16:52):
than I remember it being. Less than 10 minutes of
conversation later and my lips and eyelids feel like they're
swelling up. Bro, did you take lice?
Ibuprofen. I go to the toilet to discover
that under my shirt, my entire torso is covered in blotches.
Had to cut the date short and run to the pharmacy to buy some
antihistamines. I've been at the bar for 12
(17:15):
minutes. We had been speaking for three
months. I never spoke to her again.
Genuinely think my parting wordswere I think there's something
wrong with me. I still stand by these words
dude. I mean she sounded pretty open
and very understanding, but thenagain, those people that just
(17:36):
let things slide by because liketo be fair, we don't know if
like she was actually like cool with it.
But most times, most times people say it's good but then
they let it bottle up and then they explode because they don't
know how to set boundaries. So they can't even set
boundaries. Like with dating.
Imagine what their day-to-day life looks like.
Imagine what their work life looks like.
(17:57):
Do they bring that home? Like you see what I mean?
So at that same point, I think y'all both dodged a bullet
because, yeah, you don't need somebody that doesn't know
boundaries, and she doesn't needsomebody that's, I don't know,
an alcoholic. All right, one more story on
this thread. Back when Tender first came out,
I matched with and started talking to a girl who was in the
(18:18):
same city in Florida. I mean, it's Florida.
What? Dude, at this point I'm not
surprised about what happens from here.
She and I agreed to meet at a restaurant I have been to a few
times before. We had talked about it being her
and me, but when she arrived shewas dragging a kid with her
which she had never mentioned she had, let alone bringing him.
(18:38):
Like I said, not surprised it's Florida.
At that point I wouldn't be surprised if it was an alligator
on a leash. She sits down and almost
immediately gets on her phone tolargely ignore me and her kid.
I tried striking up a conversation but it was clear
she was not there for me at all.No OP, she was there because I
bet you the father was not paying her any of the any money.
(19:03):
Just a crazy wild accusation because why else would she be
there? She's on her phone.
So her kid and I started coloring on placemats, drawing
cartoon characters and things like that.
Food arrives, we all eat, and then she asked if she can order
another entree. I had no intention of paying for
food at this point so I said sure.
I get up to use the bathroom andgo see the waiter about the
(19:26):
check. I pay for my food and the kids
meal 'cause he and I were havinga pretty good time drawing
Minecraft characters. Round of applause.
Round of applause for OP. This dumb person could have had
an amazing partner and she was just so self-centered.
So self-centered, so egotistical.
(19:47):
Like, how are you going to ask for someone's time, not tell
somebody about the kid, which means that you know not to tell
somebody about that, and then not even interact with them.
OK. I stuck her with both her
entrees and her drinks and then bailed and blocked her on
everything. Top five, worst date for me.
Top five. What's the other four?
(20:08):
What's the other four? Oh my gosh.
See. I don't really have a yap
session to do about this one other than look at this person's
name. For my visual listeners, you
know what I'm looking at, but for my audio stemmers, the
username says Spank Bank Manager.
(20:32):
Brilliant. All righty, a fun one from the
community. Ask men titled men, what are
your most brutal online dating stories?
For me, I was talking to this beautiful woman.
She and I were having meaningfulconversations.
She has to FaceTime me so we FaceTime.
The moment I turn on my camera, she hangs up.
Immediately blocks me after seeing my face.
(20:55):
Brutal world man. Hey, at least she didn't wait
until she saw you in person because I bet you she probably
like even if the face passed. You know how these bitches are
these days. Probably weren't 6 foot but have
cried or or what if you were if you were 6 foot?
(21:16):
Even with the ugly face, them bitches still want that they do.
OK, Top comment went on a date where we agreed to meet up at
this popular sports bar known for their pizza and pasta, only
for her to reveal to me that she's starting her new vegan,
lactose free, gluten free, alcohol free diet for the whole
year. So yeah, it was a bit awkward.
(21:39):
Brother, it wasn't awkward. That was literally like every
red flag right there on a pedestal for you.
I I couldn't do pizza or pasta for out a year.
How? 95% of the time people look
worse in person. And another one saying she
studied psychology at university.
(21:59):
She thought it would be best to bring up my traumas and
childhood experiences on the first date in terms of getting
to know me. Oh man, I wonder how many people
she's hurt since five months ago.
Because that right there, she's only going to get somebody
that's so desperate for attention and understanding that
it's going to be some weird lovesituation of like therapist and
(22:24):
patients. That's not good.
That's called dragging your workinto your life and we don't want
that. You're not getting paid, bestie.
You're off the clock. Why?
Why let it live rent free? Just just drop it.
Here we have a 10 month old posttitled A Story about My Dating
(22:48):
Life. They're just venting, so let's
read it. Let's read it bestie.
Hey, I am a 21 year old male. I am from Egypt.
My first love experience was in middle school slash high school.
At that time everyone was datingbecause it was the trend back
then at Egypt and probably the rest of the world.
You got that right Opie. So I wanted to experience this
(23:10):
dating and I kind of chose the girl at random with the weird
standards like close to my height, has a cool name,
etcetera. Bro just wants to play the sums
at that point. OK.
We didn't even pass the talking stage as she told me.
I think I'm not ready to date anyone and I think we are too
young to date as dating is for people to get married.
Other than that, it's just wasting the time.
(23:32):
I really respected that point ofview and started really using it
my entire life. But less than a month later she
started dating my best friend and it did hurt a lot.
That's another good POV that youwere just offered there, so I
hope you caught on to that one OP.
The second experience was two tothree years after the first one
(23:52):
as I was young and had a bad first experience.
I have known the second experienced girl for more than
15 years but we never got close.Somehow we just started having
feelings for each other. I was worried at first but she
was so nice, good, cute, popularand really showed me how much
she cares and loves me or that what I thought.
After I confessed my love for her she told me she isn't ready
(24:15):
for a relationship and since then our friendly relationship
started fading slowly. Bro opiate quick little thing.
You can completely fix this by being extremely blunt quickly.
Or if you're not, you better be OK with people turning you down.
OK? Like come on, you're setting
yourself up. After my first two experiences,
(24:36):
I decided to focus on myself andimprove my life more.
Wow. It's almost like that's what
you're supposed to do before youget in a relationship.
During that time, I focused on my swimming, gym, diet, school,
etcetera. I became fairly attractive.
I got taller. I won competitions and qualified
for the nationals, got a scholarship in Spain.
I was succeeding at that time, achieving all mine and my family
(24:57):
goals, and I got a scholarship in America.
There I met my third experience.Oh boy, you get a little taste
of the American slice of life. I met her at work, but it took
me at least two months to start talking to her, not because I
was afraid, but because I was trying to deny my feelings for
her. Until that day came and I was
like, I will just ask for a number and go with the flow and
(25:19):
if it is meant to be, it is meant to be.
So I asked for her number and she gave it to me and there was
a connection between us, a connection I never felt before.
We were completing each other's.But as you guessed it, it didn't
work out as I didn't want to have intimacy as soon as in the
relationship. And after a week or something
she started dating another guy. OK at that point I started to
(25:42):
believe that love is like the lottery.
Some people just get lucky and win it will others just try hard
enough but never win. I don't know if I'm the problem
or my time didn't come yet but I'm just so tired from seeing
all the people around me change partners so quick and I'm just
looking at them and even sometimes giving them advices
like I'm an expert. But the truth is I just feel the
(26:03):
love from the movies and series and I have never been in a
relationship before and I don't think I'll be in one soon.
Even the girl that I started liking was giving me mixed
signals and just blocked me out of the blue.
OK I don't know why I decided towrite my story, maybe to feel
better or maybe to share the head and me with somebody.
But it made me feel better writing with my thoughts and
(26:23):
sharing it with people I know I may relate to.
And I am sorry if I made vocabulary mistakes.
Thanks. OK wait, let's see what Reddit's
saying about this because I havea feeling I know what they're
saying. I think he might be love
smothering or just have expectations that don't match
the hobbies, you know what I mean?
Like you find people through your hobbies and sometimes
(26:45):
people just aren't the normal cookie cutter expectations of
relations and hobbies, you know what I mean?
Like if somebody likes the arcade, they're going to like
gambling. You see what I mean?
OK, top comment. Come to Yamba for a response to
this hectic event. Well done.
And to still have hope to transcend above this, I reckon
(27:07):
it is time to shine. Do you?
What in the Hamlet did did Shakespeare write this?
Look after you, focus on you, dosome ooms, whatever that means.
Strengthening, fuel cleans. Do not bow down and out, you
know, no matter what language barrier, I I respect that
(27:29):
because it makes sense. The simpler the better, right?
Right. Let's go ahead and do a little
yap session. Let's do a little quick yap
session. So bro, you don't even know what
you want. You're going back and forth.
You want a girl that wants a date for marriage, but you don't
(27:54):
look for a girl that wants to date for marriage.
You fall for anybody that gives you attention.
You take forever to make a move.Two months, bro.
And then you get butter hurt that you don't give out.
Which you know, that's cool. You don't have to give out.
But if you see something from a different eye and you keep
(28:17):
finding that things keep ending the same way, you're the common
denominator, bucko. Look for people that are, I
don't know, hardcore religious or not working in the office and
talking to any guy. OK, OK, you need for your
(28:38):
expectations. Look for actual go to Christian
Mingle. Go to Christian Mingle.
OK, that that that's the end of the rant.
That's the end of the rant for that one.
OK, so here's a pretty interesting one.
It's back in the subreddit. Ask woman over 30.
Apparently they talk about dating a lot in that community
by the looks of it being the second story in the subreddit
(29:02):
titled Ladies who met the love of their life after years of
mediocre dates and knew pretty quickly it was their person.
Share your stories. Would love to hear some positive
stories. I30 female, have been dating for
a long time and even after two LTRS and several situation ships
and countless mandates, I've never really felt a strong
enough connection to know I wantto spend my life with someone.
(29:25):
I know love isn't always a fairytale and that relationships take
time to build, but I love hearing about couples who had
insane chemistry right off the bat that's only grown stronger
over time. Thanks all.
OK so we have a little thread comment thingy.
So each comment is their own little story or little hot take
or or whatever they want to do. It's the yap fest thread.
Top one saying I stopped hoping for movie love.
(29:48):
I instead thought about how great my life would be and what
kind of partner would walk that path with me.
Inserts success horns the 420 noscope Boo Boo, Boo, Boo Boo Boo.
That exactly right there that exactly right there.
Like that's it. Wrap it up, wrap up all the
dating subreddits. It's done.
That's it. That's it.
(30:09):
I mean, that's that's the answer.
I I don't know what else you want.
What else do you want? Someone to hold your hands and
jerk it for you, but that's it. Instead, think about how great
your life could be with or without a partner, and what kind
of partner would walk that path with me?
Too long, Didn't read Life is for you.
(30:32):
A partner is called a partner because partners.
You get what I mean? You get what I mean.
OK. This took out 95% of men as life
partners, which relieved a greatdeal of pressure.
And about online dating, I switched to only consider
meeting men, writing full sentences and carrying the
conversation with antidotes, relevant comments and questions.
(30:53):
Hey, and what about you guys went out?
And the quality of my dating experience really went up
dramatically. Yes, yes, this is communication
tells your soul. That's just how it is.
Like your communication style comes from your experiences and
how you were raised growing up, how you raised yourself growing
(31:15):
up. How you interact with yourself
is how you communicate with people.
And if you're saying, well, no, I talked to myself differently
than the way I talked to anotherperson, dumb motherfucker,
that's you deciding to do that. You were deciding to translate
it differently. You're not on.
No, you can no, no, no, no, no, no.
(31:36):
Yes, it's autopilot, but you're still the pilot.
It was your choice to be on idleautopilot.
Lord have mercy. Another comment.
We work together and we're friends.
I had a medical emergency and missed a day of work.
OK. When I came back he wasn't in
the office that day. A Co worker told me he was gone
(31:57):
for a week on vacation. I was so disappointed and
surprised because I missed this man.
I realized I had feelings. Then when he returned he told me
he also had ADVT in the past. That's the same medical
condition she suffered from earlier.
He was a lifeline during a scarytime.
I courted him for a couple of months unbeknownst to him.
(32:19):
Finally a Co worker tipped him off that I was sweet on him.
On my birthday he filled my office with hundreds of balloons
as a prank. Prank right?
I also knew when I had a chance.We've been together 11 years.
I love started as friendships and we're still best friends.
We're very lucky be friends withthem before.
(32:41):
Because if you're just looking for the Dick, that ain't going
to happen. That isn't going to happen.
Yes, it's very important in a relationship, but if that's all
you're looking for, that's all you get.
You want to look for a Dick head, you're going to get a Dick
head, if you get what I mean by that.
Another one, at 32, I met my husband at a bar.
(33:03):
He was really attractive so I came up to him to start a chat.
We had a lot of things in common.
Hobbies, cultural background, travel, stories.
We had a great time getting to know each other that night and
got each other's contacts following that night.
He really impressed me. He messaged consistently.
He remembered conversations and small details.
He planned dates, he wanted to see me and spend time with me.
(33:25):
He didn't play any games. He was consistent, kind,
empathetic, interested in getting to know me, interested
in building a life with me. Fast forward four months into
dating, the pandemic started. Oh God, did you guys have like a
love baby? OK, he came to pick up, we
stocked up on our essentials, went to his house and I never
left. He's a wonderful, stable, kind,
hard working man with good priorities and morals who really
(33:47):
cares about his family. So all this isn't a post about
crazy passion or love at first sight, it's one that I think is
a solid foundation for lifelong partnership.
Remember, a partnership is a relationship.
A relationship is anything from a family relationship, a a
partner relationship, a friendship, a Co worker like
relationship you you interactingwith them.
(34:10):
Every time you interact you are setting your foundation of how
you move on in the future with all future conversations with
them. It is the foundation and you are
the one that decides how you want to be treated and what you
expect. So if you are passive and you
don't want to say the things that you know you expect in the
(34:34):
future, brother, then don't complain and don't cry if it
starts going away where you already set it up to go that
way. They don't know.
They're not mind readers. And honestly, that's a huge
point of trying to figure out how to get away from people that
gaslight you, that are manipulators, that are
narcissists. Whatever trend that you find
(34:55):
yourself in, if you're in that situation and you feel like no
matter what you do, you just feel like you keep getting with
the wrong people, you're lettingyourself get with the wrong
people. OK, maybe change it up.
Go for somebody you don't usually go for like looks wise.
You don't always have to date the six foot tall dude.
(35:16):
You don't always have to date the dude that's in an accounting
job. Go for the one that's, I don't
know, like door dashing. I don't know.
I don't know what you're into, but it doesn't have to be what
you're into when it comes to their life.
You know what I mean? You're not playing Sims.
You can't just pick out exactly what job you want them to work,
(35:39):
what hair color they have, theirheights, their weights.
Don't be wrong, You're allowed to have boundaries.
But are those really boundaries,if they're an expectation of
massive qualities that they can technically control?
Because maybe you're like, I don't like that job, I don't
like the job. But you, you get what you get.
(36:02):
If you want somebody that's a security officer at a nightclub,
he's going to be around people that cheat a lot.
Guilt by association, honey. Not everybody's that strong to
not be what they're around. So that's what I mean by that.
Be smart. If it's a duck, it's a duck,
(36:25):
because if it cracks like a duck, it's could be a duck.
But how do we know? Is it worth the risk to figure
out? You know what I mean?
Be smarter, stop, get some help.OK so I wasn't going to read any
more from this thread but this is the last one.
OK this happened to me. I was in a healthy long term
(36:48):
relationship until I was 24. That ended because he wouldn't
stop partying with his coworkersand cheating on me.
And then I was in a another unhealthy long term relationship
from 25 to 28. You see why I wanted to read
this one because first of all, multiple times cheated.
OK honey first time OK I get it.Be like, OK, you can't do this.
(37:11):
These are my boundaries because you can do one or two things,
tell them goodbye, we're done. Or two, can't do that again or
I'm done right? Multiple times.
You're just showing through action that you don't care if he
cheats because if you cared, you'd leave.
That doesn't mean that your emotions that you feel towards
the action that someone did thatto you are invalid.
No, you're allowed to feel sad about that.
(37:33):
But why are you sad if you don'teven love yourself?
It's kind of kind of kind of ridiculous.
You see where I'm going with that bestie, OK.
But I had honestly emotionally checked out of that relationship
a year and a half before I endedit.
He was much older and became emotionally abusive because he
was insecure and it just wasn't working regardless because we
(37:55):
were in two very different places in life.
So newly single at 28 and never having had the opportunity to
really date, I went a little crazy on those dating apps.
Nothing wrong with that Queen. I had a lot of fun
conversations, many of which fizzled out and I went on a lot
of dates. Get tested friend.
(38:17):
More than 60? Yeah, get tested.
I found it really liberating. A few turned into second and
third dates and several men tried to pursue things further
with me, but I just wasn't really feeling it.
Good for you. This was an amazing learning
process for uop. I didn't want to end up in
another mediocre long term relationship.
Eventually I decided to quit theapps and I stopped dating.
I just kind of focused on myselfand worked a lot.
(38:40):
OK then at 29 I was bored, randomly redownloaded an app and
decided to meet someone I matched with.
I know this sounds silly, but from the first minute of meeting
him I knew he was going to be a very significant person in my
life. We spent five hours just talking
and it felt like 5 minutes. Curiosity and that, that's fun.
(39:04):
I'm excited. I'm excited to see where this
goes. We were immediately inseparable
and we have basically spent every day together since the
first day we met. OK, we kind of felt like that's
the point in talking our time when we just know it had been
seven years since that day and we are now married.
He's the brightest light I've ever felt and has never gotten
any dimmer. I feel terrible for the younger
(39:25):
versions of me who thought I'd never find him, and I really
hope everyone gets to experiencetheir version of it because it's
truly fucking magical. So it's out there, but you may
have to deal with some bullshit before you find it.
Beautiful story to end this all on almost like a full circle
wrap up moment. You will go through pain, right?
(39:46):
Like whatever, you know, like how you go to like TJ Maxx or
like Goodwill or Ross or whatever.
And you see those like silly little like home plaques like
home sweet home. And it's through pain is where
you find happiness or you have to experience pain to understand
what happiness means. You get what I mean with this.
(40:07):
It's unfortunately true. It really is.
Even though man, what a waste ofpains and wood and money because
honestly, Ross and TJ Maxx and all those are just like
landfills and just tricks peopleinto over consuming.
We can talk about that on another episode.
Anyways, This is why it's so important to if you find
(40:30):
yourself in a relationship that doesn't work, it happens to like
everyone, no matter if you were sexually with them or just a
friendship. People have their debuttles,
right? Right.
People know always get along. That's OK.
(40:50):
You're not always supposed to get along.
Nobody always gets along. There is always a situation
where people cannot see eye to eye.
That's normal. And if you are doubting me, then
someone's going to take horribleadvantage of you because of that
(41:10):
perspective, because if you think that that's normal,
they're going to get away with alot of things.
OK, So that that's that's a goodstep one on that one.
OK, It's OK though. So proud of you.
I'm just worried for you. But like right here, like you,
you'll find some bullshit beforeyou find it.
And there are younger versions of yourself.
(41:33):
Don't get me wrong, I kind of feel mentally stole a different
areas of my life, but with like the extra education that I've
got through each year. Because if you're not learning
each year at that point, why areyou?
What are you doing? Stop, stop, stop doing
scrolling. Stop been rotting because you
should be learning something every year and it's not learning
(41:55):
how to have a relationship so that you're not lonely.
It's more so learning how to make your own relationship with
yourself to share it with somebody.
Think of it like any arts or anyanything that you can create or
anything that you've you have a hobby of like like anybody know
these like little fidget things like this is awesome.
(42:17):
I want to show it to somebody I love and care about because I
want them to know more about me and more about what makes me
happy. And same goes for them.
I want them to come to me and show me things that make them
happy. And if you can't see that
either, then that can make you abad partner without realizing
(42:38):
it. And that's where I kind of on,
ironically, can plug something that means a lot to me.
I didn't think I was going to actually mention it on this
podcast episode. I was going to let it breathe
because I just made this Reddit community.
It's actually crazy. I swear.
This is not plans, but I did make a community called Why Did
(43:02):
That Hurt? And in the description, I wrote
a place to unpack emotional reactions and explore why things
hit harder than expected. This is a community to explore
the psychology behind big or small emotional reactions.
Why did that moment sting? Why did that comment stay with
you? Post your story, your thoughts,
(43:23):
and end with one question. Why did that hurt?
OK, let me pull this up. Let me pull this up.
Let me see if I can pull it up on Reddit real quick.
It might not show up because there's like no members.
I just made it. I haven't talked about it.
Why did that hurt let's see let's see communities yes it's
(43:47):
18 plus because it's talking about mental health because we
don't need people underage trying to self diagnose this
isn't Tumblr OK, so this is it right here.
We have two members Why did thathurt So let's go ahead and go
down. I want to go to the top one.
This is me by the way this is myReddit.
If you ever want to like send mea message or send me a post that
(44:10):
you really want to see read out and what my opinion or if you
have your own opinion, dude, send me that and write your,
your opinion. I would love to read that.
I'll, I'll do a little segment about that.
I'm, I'm so serious about that too, by the way.
But welcome. Let's unpack together.
Bestie. Have you ever had a moment where
someone said or did something small, but it hit way harder
(44:30):
than you expected? Maybe it was a joke, a glance, a
forgotten text, or a harmless comments and for some reason
it's stuck with you. This subreddit is here to
explore those emotions. Not to judge, but to ask why did
it hurt? This is a space for exploring
emotional reactions, understanding how background
(44:51):
shapes perception, reflecting onthe psychology behind small or
big interpersonal moments, Talking about pain without
needing a clear villain. No blame game you want to figure
out, right? So if you want to post on this,
absolutely would love you to. I'll go ahead and update my
social media links in the description and include this.
(45:12):
You can tell the story, describea situation, or even just share
a passing comment that stuck with you and your post with the
question, why did that hurt? Others will reflect with you,
not fix, not judge, just help you explore, be kind, be
curious, be reflective. Welcome home bestie.
(45:33):
Let's get in touch with ourselves.
Talk to you soon. OK, so let's go back to that
Reddit page. I'm not in the Beanie Baby
subreddit. You're in the Beanie Baby sub
for my audio summers. I like Beanie Babies.
OK, so we do have some rules. So there's a couple threads out
here that if you want to put a comment to them, we'll get there
(45:55):
in a second. But let me see if I have the
rules out. Let me see if I have the rules.
I'm not really quite sure. Let's see.
Let's see. All right here, here's the rules
or six simple rules. OK, one reflect don't rants.
OK, this is not am I the asshole?
This is not whatever because a lot of them are just like they
just want to rant or like vent and like don't be wrong.
(46:18):
That's normal, but that's not here.
Like go over to the other ones. This isn't for that, because
then you get the stupid ass postwhere it's very clearly brother,
you're not the asshole. Like stop just trying to like
get attention just get a fuckingjournal.
Anyways this is uneventing subreddit post should aim to
explore emotional responses, notjust offload frustration or seek
(46:39):
validation. 2 no self diagnosis.Did you hear me back there in
the corner? No self diagnosis.
This creates a world of enablingand we don't want that.
You can discuss psychology and emotion.
You can't tell a Reddit user I eat.
Dude, these are I didn't know. OK, so when I wrote this I was
just joking, but these are actual Oh my gosh for OK so I'm
(47:05):
reading it right now and it's a hyperlink to the user.
I was just making a joke OK and it I didn't know there was
actually Reddit users that have this name OK anyway you can't
tell Reddit user I eat ass that they're dealing with a
narcissist or user bugs are on me that they're schizo.
You can instead offer definitions with clinical
examples to show traits of diagnosis for those that don't
(47:28):
know medical or don't know what the fuck I just said.
Don't say oh your mom's just a narcissist bro you're good.
Say oh your mom my your mom is showing signs of of a
personality disorder or or be asblunt like your mom might be a
narcissist and This is why And provide evidence from the
(47:49):
original post. God damn don't just make
assumptions. Clinically based.
OK, OK #3 why not what we're here to unpack why something
hurt. Make sure you post invites
reflection, not just storytelling.
Go to Emma the asshole for that one.
(48:11):
Or overreacting whatever. 4 no low effort or meme post.
Post must be meaningful and opento reflection.
No memes, screenshots without context or joke post Duh.
I have to put that because then people are going to be like Boo
Hoo crybaby when they wonder whytheir their bullshit went down.
Like no karma farming here bitches. 5 Respect privacy, blur
(48:35):
names and identifying details Ifyou're sharing a personal story
involving others. You also wouldn't think I would
have to put this but you know people are dumb these days. 6 Be
kind always. I just said people are dumb and
you know, you can, you can be kind.
Hold on, this is important. So let me read this.
But that doesn't mean Sugarcoat thinks this is a space for
(48:56):
reflection and vulnerability. You can call somebody dumb if
they're dumb. There's nothing wrong with that,
right? Like there's nothing wrong with
that, but you have to say why they're dumb.
This is a community where we need to be more situationally,
culturally self where you have to put it's, it's called a
(49:17):
holistic view. Holistic means like everything.
So like the, the house, the living situation, what's their
food situation? It's, it's the hierarchy of
needs. You can look that up.
It's it talks about like housingfinancial, what's their job look
like? What's their day-to-day?
How do they take care of themselves?
You have to consider all this because they do that for a
(49:39):
reason. Human beings react to anything
based on how they've already seen the world.
It's why pain can never be studied appropriately in a way
where everything's like on an equal field.
Because not everybody sees pain the same way.
The same way people don't have the same definition for sadness,
people don't have the same definition for happiness.
(50:00):
One person's goal is something completely different than
another goal. We're all on different areas of
the board. It's so fun, so fun when you
view the world like this, right?OK, and you can message me here.
Here I am for my audio stummers.It's Leah's tired tired Gato on
Reddit and the subreddit again is called Why did that hurt?
(50:24):
Excited to see you over there. Really wasn't expecting to talk
about this. Another day, another dating
disaster survived. Whether you're single, taken or
just here for the chaos, thanks for joining me in this cringe
filled corner of the Internet. Whatever you want to call it.
(50:45):
But if you laughed, cringed or side eyed your screen at any
point, don't forget to hit that subscribe button bestie.
Follow me on all the socials, maybe like Instagram, TikTok X
Twitter, whatever you want to call it and whatever else I'm
over sharing my opinions on. We call it the Yapfest.
(51:05):
There's a reason I give myself a60 second timer.
And yet these videos still turn out like over 45 minutes.
Anyways, and let's keep the chaotic energy going.
Links are in the description below.
And until next time, may your dates be less disastrous.
Maybe, Who knows. That kind of takes away from the
(51:26):
fun. OK, and your Reddit scrolls be
even messier. Bye bestie.
You have been listening to Reddit radio.
Catch you on the next frequency.
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