June 23, 2025 • 63 mins
Welcome back to The Power Lounge! I'm Amy Vaughan, and this week, I'm thrilled to welcome Seema Giri—an international bestselling author, wellness and leadership expert, and founder of UpLyft Media. Seema will share her inspiring journey from battling a debilitating illness to achieving success without experiencing burnout. Together, we'll explore what it truly means to redefine success for high-achieving women who balance demanding careers, family, and the drive to excel, often at the expense of their wellbeing.
In our conversation, Seema recounts her six-year struggle before receiving an autoimmune diagnosis and how she discovered a new approach to self-leadership and healing. We'll challenge the notion that productivity requires personal sacrifice, delve into the cultural factors contributing to burnout, and uncover how listening to your body's wisdom can help you set boundaries, cultivate joy, and implement lasting change.
You'll gain valuable insights, science-backed tips, and practical strategies—from body scans to box breathing—that offer a roadmap for thriving on your own terms. Whether you're managing a never-ending to-do list or seeking a better balance between ambition and self-care, this episode provides advice to help you transition from burnout to balance.
Seema Giri brings over 30 years of leadership experience, guiding hundreds of women to publish, speak, and lead with confidence. As the founder of UpLyft Media and Chief Growth Officer at Upbuild Global Inc., she empowers purpose-driven entrepreneurs to transform their personal stories into bestselling books and powerful brands.
Join us as we uncover the secrets to succeeding without sacrificing your health or soul. Don't miss this enlightening conversation on The Power Lounge.
Chapters:
00:00 - Introduction
02:05 - "Empowering Success Without Sacrifice"
09:26 - Autoimmune Insights and Advocacy
10:32 - Pregnancy's Unexpected Physical Changes
15:46 - Easing Back Into Meditation
23:29 - Grounding Techniques for Stress Relief
26:42 - Breathing Techniques for Stress Relief
33:44 - "Origins and Self-Awareness"
40:25 - "Benefits of Saying No"
45:13 - Leadership Trap: Stuck in the Weeds
52:37 - Listening to Your Body After 40
53:59 - Prioritizing Family Presence
01:01:55 - Together Digital Podcast Highlights
01:02:48 - Outro
Quotes:
"Wellness and success are allies, creating a life worth living."- Amy Vaughan
"Support others first, then lead yourself. Create your story one step at a time."- Seema Giri
Connect with Seema Giri
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/seemagiri/
Website:https://uplyft.media/
Connect with the host Amy Vaughan:
LinkedIn: http://linkedin.com/in/amypvaughan
Podcast:Power Lounge Podcast - Together Digital
Learn more about Together Digital and consider joining the movement by visitingHome - Together Digital
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Hello everyone and welcome to our weekly power
lounge.
This is your place to hearauthentic conversations from
those who have power to share.
My name is Amy Vaughn and I amthe owner and chief empowerment
officer of Together Digital, adiverse and collaborative
community of women who choose toshare their knowledge, power
and connections.
You can join the movement attogetherindigitalcom.
(00:30):
And today we're exploring atopic that hits close to home
for so many high achieving womenwithin our community and beyond
how to succeed withoutsacrificing your health or your
soul, as it feels like sometimes, and I am thrilled to introduce
and welcome Seema Giri.
She is the founder andinternational bestselling author
(00:52):
and transformational expert inwellness and leadership, who
truly embodies what it means torise from challenge to change.
As the founder of Uplift Mediaand the CGO at Uplift or Upbuild
Global Inc.
Seema has spent over 30 yearshelping purpose-driven
entrepreneurs transform theirpersonal stories into
(01:14):
best-selling books andpowerhouse brands.
But what makes her storyparticularly powerful is her own
personal journey, overcoming adebilitating illness.
She has dedicated her life toempowering others to thrive
without burnout.
Seema has guided hundreds ofwomen to publish, to speak, to
lead with confidence, and hermission goes far beyond business
(01:36):
success.
She is here to help us rewritethe rules of what success looks
like, where wellness isn't anafterthought but a
non-negotiable.
It is a non but anon-negotiable strategy for
long-term achievement.
So, friends, listeners, if youare struggling with a demanding
career, personal life, thedesire to do more, or maybe all
(01:56):
of the above, today'sconversation is going to give
you the tools to shift fromburnout to balance.
So please join me in welcomingSeema Gary to the Power Lounge.
Welcome, seema.
Speaker 2 (02:08):
Hi Amy, I'm so happy to be here in this Power Lounge
with you and with your listeners.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
Absolutely.
And those of you who are herewith us live, live listeners.
We love you and we appreciateyou for taking the time to be
here with us in real time.
Use the chat, ask questions ifyou have them.
I promise you we will get tothem before the end of the
conversation.
And for those of you who aren'tlistening live, just know that
you always can.
You can find our events onEventbrite.
(02:34):
Also, be sure to follow us onYouTube and anywhere you stream
your podcasts.
All right, seema, let's getinto this.
I'm excited for thisconversation.
These questions, I think, are alot of the questions that are
swirling around in all of ourbusy little brains.
But first I want to start withyour journey.
(02:56):
As I mentioned in your bio, youexperienced a debilitating
illness, and then that tobecoming a wellness and
leadership expert.
It's pretty remarkable.
What was the turning point foryou that made you realize that
success needed to be redefined,not just for you, but the women
that you serve, Wow.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
So you know, years ago this is 27 years to be exact
I was struggling with just thegeneral kind of tiredness and
just exhausted and thatsometimes felt like maybe coming
down with a cold, sometimes itfelt like a flu, sometimes it
(03:31):
just felt like I was beingoverworked, right, but I didn't
really pay much attention atthat time.
I was in my 20s then and I wasnewly married, had a great job
partying over the weekend, so Istarted cutting things out, you
know, stop the partying, justfocus on working and coming home
(03:52):
.
But still things weren'tgetting better.
So you know, as women, we arealways putting things off and
not going to the doctor rightaway.
We'll try everything else.
So finally, I went to the doctorand they did their tests and
everything came out normal.
So they said you know, you'rejust depressed or you have you
know.
So I kept going to more doctorsand.
(04:12):
I kept hearing the same thing.
But now, amy, I was in extremepain.
I couldn't drive, I was in painall the time and it's like you
look perfectly healthy.
Healthy from the outside, maybea little tired, but yeah, it
felt like a tsunami was going ininternally.
It took six years to finally bediagnosed correctly.
(04:34):
Wow, with three types ofautoimmune issues um a
hypothyroid, rheumatoidarthritis and fibromyalgia.
oh my.
And before and before that, allthe doctors were saying it's in
your head, it's, you know, it's.
You're a woman.
I was, I felt, dismissed, rightBecause I'm a woman, and but
(04:56):
that there was a little voiceinside me that said you know,
just, there's something there,keep going.
So finally, after beingdiagnosed with these three types
of autoimmune issues, put me on30 medications.
Wow, which was still.
You know, the pain was a littlebit better, but there were so
many side effects and justtaking this kind of medicine was
not easy and just maintaining aregular work was also very hard
(05:20):
.
Um, then I had my son.
The doctor said you know, see,my pregnancy changes your entire
hormone and body and so if youhave, you know, if you start
having children, that might helpyou.
But, then I was at a moralconflict here, amy, because one
(05:41):
I did not want kids, and thattoo at that time, right, and
then I didn't want kids, andthat too at that time.
Speaker 1 (05:49):
And then I didn't want to use a child as an
experiment and then not be happyloving a child and the child is
going to suffer.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
So I had to struggle with this emotional and moral
conflict and I was like you know, this is not fair, I'd rather
deal with the pain.
But I finally came to termsthat you know, this is something
that I would want and I wouldhonor the child and love the
child the best I could.
So the pregnancy helped.
I never felt better.
I released weight.
(06:16):
I only had the baby weight.
Pregnancy, the delivery was alittle difficult and I think
because of that, soon after twomonths after my delivery, I
became bedridden, wow, and Icouldn't enjoy my baby.
I couldn't hold him, I couldn't.
You know, the joys of newmotherhood was like, felt like
was taken away from me.
(06:37):
And the doctors then said Seema, you know we can make you
comfortable, but I'm sorry, thisis how your life is going to be
for the rest of your life.
And I looked at them and I waslike, really, are you sure?
You know?
So got opinions, doctor afterdoctor, and they all said yes.
(07:00):
Then, amy, I did the only thingI could and I looked at my baby
and I said Then, amy, I did theonly thing I could and I looked
at my baby and I said no, thisis not the life you're going to
have.
He didn't come in this world.
I had a son.
He didn't come in this world tohave this kind of a life.
I said I'm going to do whateverI can to give you the best
possible life, and I made thatpromise to him and to me.
(07:21):
So I noticed that you know, aswomen women it's hard for us to
do something for ourselves, andit's okay if you can't do it for
yourself, but take an actionfor someone else that you love
so much.
So my child was my catalyst, myinspiration, and I started
listening more to myself.
Up to this point, although Iwas raised in the US, I'm from
(07:45):
an Indian family, and a verytraditional, conservative Indian
family.
Yeah, so I was.
I had a blueprint that I had tofollow and so I was told I
didn't, couldn't really use myown thoughts and feelings and
ideas and make my decisions.
Right up to this point, Ihadn't really made any major
decision, and now I was forcedto make my own decision.
(08:08):
Family and doctors were allsaying the same thing.
I had to cut out all that noise, go internal and say okay,
seema, what is it?
And I started listening to myintuition.
Then, when you make thosedecisions, the right people come
into your life.
I had a family friend livingclose by Veena Singla is her
(08:30):
name and she told me she saidSeema, put on your big girl
panties and start taking controlof your life and your health.
So the things that the doctorsaid nutrition is not going to
help much.
Exercise is not going to help.
Much exercise is not going tohelp much.
Those are the exact things thathelp.
So I started implementing wholefood nutrition.
I love it and within fourmonths uh, amy, I was up and
(08:54):
about.
I was able to take care ofmyself.
Six months later, I was able totake care of my son and really
start on that healing journey.
So it's really about what areyou fueling yourself with?
Right in terms of nutrition, interms of what your stories,
you're allowing it and who youare listening to and I find, as
(09:17):
women, we really listen toeveryone else around us.
Yes For ourselves.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Yes, I love that, seema.
Thank you for sharing thatvulnerable story.
And you know, it is true,there's no one coming to save us
and the answers are not outsideyou, they are absolutely within
you, like everything startsthere, the way you see the world
, the way the world sees you,all of it, and I love that you
shared that because it's funny.
As soon as you started speakingabout your symptoms, my first
(09:43):
thought was autoimmune.
I can't tell you how many womenI know that are dealing with
autoimmune issues and it doestake anywhere from five to seven
years sometimes for them to bediagnosed.
This includes my own mom, andI've been her patient advocate
for over a decade, and soanytime someone starts to share
some things with me and it'sfunny because I get medical
professionals now will tell me,even as the vet.
Today I was talking to the vetfor my cat.
(10:05):
She's like are you in themedical profession?
I'm like no, I just I educatemyself, you know, on these
things because you know, and Iused to work in health care it's
so, it's so.
It's so fractional and peoplearen't talking to other people
and the systems are very broken,in my opinion, that it does
leave especially women and myown orities in a place where
(10:26):
they can either be misdiagnosed,mistreated or, you know, never
diagnosed and just told well,this is what life is, and it's
going to be suffering and no,there's nothing you can do,
which I love that you're like.
That is not an answer I'mwilling to accept.
No, and you're so right.
Kids, do you mess witheverything?
I think my foot grew by like ahalf size.
My eyesight changed, I actuallymy eyesight got better while I
(10:48):
was pregnant and I ended up witha astigmatism that went away as
soon as my kids came.
I had no clue that, like, thehormones and the things in your
body that are produced whilepregnant and after could do so
much to your physical body.
So I think this is a great callto you listeners.
You know who are.
You know having theseexperiences where you feel like
(11:09):
your, your feelings, yoursymptoms, all of these things
that are telling you likesomething is wrong.
You, just you have to keepadvocating for yourself and
wanting something more, becauseyou're right, you're doing it
for your kids, you're doing itfor your family and not just
yourself.
Right, you can't show up halfempty and a hollow shell of a
person, right?
It's just not the kind ofmother any of us would have
(11:31):
wanted.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
And that's the thing that.
The other thing that I want tobring out is eventually, you
want to move into doing it foryourself.
Yeah, now, at this point, thethings I'm doing doing, I'm
doing it for myself because youknow, especially if you have a
family and a community aroundyou, people don't do as they, as
you say, they do as you do, yes, so that is really important
(11:54):
too, and it all boils down, amy,to self-leadership.
How are you leading yourself?
And then why is anyone going tofollow you?
If you want to be leader, evenat the workplace, right, yes,
that's because you have the mom.
Title does not mean you're nota leader.
You're leading the mostimportant community ever,
(12:15):
because these children are goingto grow up to be leaders, and
how they behave and communicateand the things they do is going
to affect everybody.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
I love it.
Preach girl, all right, youknow I'm always in the mindset
of our listeners and our membersbecause you know I get to be in
work, close in community withthem and I know that.
You know it's not anintentional thing.
But oftentimes those who arehigh achievers where their busy
schedules like a badge of honorand use that as a reason not to
(12:44):
take the time that they need totake for themselves, how do you
help women recognize when theyhave crossed the line from
productive ambition to harmfulburnout?
Speaker 2 (12:55):
Well, you know, you start noticing things that
you're not getting as muchthings done, right, you are
frustrated.
You are tired.
You are irritated, right,things that may not bother you
start bothering you, right, Ilove being busy, I love having a
(13:17):
packed schedule because I feellike I am so much more
productive.
Then, right, but you're noteven machines.
You're not a machine, but evenmachines need downtime.
They need to be maintained,they need to have be oiled, they
need to have all it, just likeyour cars, right.
They won't give you that kindof mileage if you don't take
(13:39):
regular care.
That's how we are and for us,it's in the form of rest.
Right, and I think one of thereasons really is hard because,
um, we want to have it all.
And in order to have it all,you know we have to do certain
things.
And it also comes from cultureand your background, right, how
(14:00):
you've been raised.
In our culture, from the, fromthe period of those who came
here as an immigrant, we had tolead a very different life.
You know, for safety purposes,we had to be almost invisible,
work really hard, we did nothave time to rest and at that
time, if you did rest, you wereconsidered lazy, you were
(14:21):
considered not serious enoughabout your work.
So that builds that.
It's in part of our DNA, right?
So it's part of recognizingthose things.
Whose belief is it Right?
And then, what were the reasonswe were told back in the day,
and does that still apply today?
And it doesn't apply todayBecause things are different.
(14:42):
We are the next generation.
Yes, so you are allowed to rest.
Your body absolutely needs it,right?
You'll start seeing symptoms,like I did, and autoimmune
initial symptoms are verygeneric.
You could have anything.
You could be from nothing tohaving cancer, right, it's such
(15:03):
a big thing.
So you need to, you know, beyour own best friend as soon as
you start noticing anythingdifferent in your body.
Listen to your body.
Your body says things verysoftly.
I didn't start getting tired,just that in my 20s.
It's been happening over aperiod of time.
(15:24):
At that time I was a teenagerand I didn't know what it was
saying.
So, start listening to yourbody.
It might be, if you startnoticing a pattern, like every
time you're ready to ramp up,something happens and you're
slowing down.
Right, that was the biggestthing for me.
I'm ready to ramp up things andI'm ready to go, and then
(15:45):
something happens and I'm backto square one.
Things just like taking a fiveminute breather.
You know, just sit for fiveminutes and breathe, yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
That's hard.
For some people that's reallyhard and I would say, like start
with, like small doses, likeI've recommended.
Maybe in past episodes of like,during the pandemic, I was
trying to get back into mymeditation practice.
I had been meditating, doingyoga, since I was 18, like in
the 90s, before anybody wasreally talking about it and
doing it was trendy, and so forme it took me time, even having
(16:18):
practiced in the past, you know,20 years later to come back to
it In the past.
You know 20 years later to comeback to it.
I found walking meditations tobe really good and helpful
because I had that extra energythat I needed to get out, or
meditating after working out,somehow expending energy got me
into stillness a little biteasier.
So playing around and figuringout what works for you is great,
(16:38):
and I agree like stress is sucha big impact and can really
drive inflammation in the body,which then is like huge for
autoimmune right.
So if you are dealing withsomething autoimmune or even
hormonal based, you know again,those stressors cause you to
slow down and I really wantthose who are listening to
remember that rest is actually apart of productivity, right.
(17:01):
Like you said, that machine hasto shut down and it's not just
sleep, but it's quality sleep.
It's, you know, time doingnothing and being bored and
learning how to be in stillness,and it's not like you have to
be in a cave meditating for fivehours.
But, you know, finding thoselittle moments and points of
rest.
That's what's going to help youcarry you across the finish
line.
It's not going until your legscome out from underneath you
(17:24):
right like the rest is requiredto get to the finish line and
and if you don't like meditationor rest, think of this way.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
What brings you joy?
Do the things that brings youjoy.
Right, because you want to havefun.
Life is meant to be fun.
Yeah, yeah, that's actually the.
You're here to do something.
You're not here to struggle,and if you're struggling, then
that's probably not the area youneed to be focusing on.
These are signs, right, I hadno idea that struggle is a sign
(17:54):
that you're probably doingsomething that you're not meant
to do, because when you're doingsomething that you're meant to
do, it comes with ease, it flowseasily.
There are hard times, difficulttimes during that time right,
but you feel more joy, you feelmore energized.
So, everything you're doing,whether you're with people, do
you assess yourself?
(18:15):
Are these people giving meenergy?
Yeah, are they.
And the tasks you're doing?
Is this giving me energy?
Out now, we have so muchresources to outsource things.
Outsource them, right.
You can't outsource your health.
You have to take theresponsibility for it and take
responsibility.
You know people.
We keep saying you know this ishappening, this is happening,
(18:37):
this is happening, but we don'ttake that responsibility, that's
leadership take yourresponsibility and take action,
because we other people can bedoing things around us, but
we're allowing them to do itwith us, right?
Speaker 1 (18:53):
right.
Yeah, I love that lead leadyourself first and then allow
others to follow.
I love that so much, what youwere talking about a second ago,
though I think I want to bringit back to that for the next
question because I totallyrealize, as a former very busy,
very like in in my career, kindof weeds kind of person, I
literally was living in my headalone, my head, and like I was
(19:17):
might as well just been from theneck up for about 10 years.
You know, let's start talkingabout like reconnecting with
your body's wisdom as a guide.
You said something about.
You know let's start talkingabout like reconnecting with
your body's wisdom as a guide.
You said something about youknow paying attention to where
energy comes in, where energygoes, energy flows right.
So like where do I feel energy?
But then a lot of women they'relike I don't know, I really
don't feel anything from theneck down.
(19:39):
How can you help?
Or how have you helped womenwho've been living in their
heads for years kind of takethat first step into rebuilding
the connection with their bodyso they actually can pay
attention to the things thatbring them energy?
Because a lot of times you'llsay that and women are like I
don't know what that means,because I don't remember the
last time I felt anything againfrom like the neck down yeah,
(20:01):
yeah, those, the, the.
Speaker 2 (20:04):
I find that is usually when we're trying to not
feel things right.
I would like to, if it's okaywith you, amy.
Yeah, just take a real quickexercise right now, absolutely.
So.
Everyone is in their own safeplace, you can close your eyes,
take a deep breath in and justscan your body.
This is called a body scan.
(20:24):
You start from the top and justscan your body.
This is called a body scan.
You start from the top and youjust go down, start from your
head and just feel your face,your cheeks, take another deep
breath in and just go feel yourneck and you want to look.
For where do you feel any kindof sensation or any kind of pain
(20:46):
?
Right, you might feel pain, youmight feel stuckness, you might
feel maybe even some kind ofwarmth or heat.
As we scan the body now we'reat our chest and our upper
shoulders and arms.
See where you feel thatsensation Down to your stomach,
(21:15):
your middle of your back, yourarms.
In any place you feel any kindof stiffness, any kind of pain,
maybe any kind of pain, maybeany kind of heat, any kind of
sensation.
Everyone is different.
I want you to bring yourawareness to that spot and just
(21:36):
send your breath there.
Take a deep breath in, bringawareness of that particular
spot and send your breath there.
Take a few breaths and send itthere and continue scanning.
Now we're at our hips, ourbuttocks, go down to your thighs
(21:59):
, your knees, your calves andany time you feel any kind of
stiffness, a pain, somesensation, take a moment to
bring that to your awareness andsend a few deep breaths
(22:23):
directly to that spot.
And send a few deep breathsdirectly to that spot and you'll
notice that it's opening up alittle.
The pain may have seized alittle, the stiffness might be
less, the sensation might havegone away.
(22:44):
Now bring it down to yourankles and your feet.
So by doing this exercise, amy,this has been a great way for
people to start connecting andnoticing different parts of
their body where they're feeling.
A sensation or pain usuallycomes up as a pain.
Speaker 1 (23:12):
Yeah, I love that so much.
Hot tip for those of you whoare still in working office
environments One I apologize,you're having to be at a work
office every day.
That's hard sometimes nowwithout the flexibility, but I
used to actually go into thoselittle huddle like phone booth
rooms because they were privateand between meetings, and I mean
what you just took us throughthere, seema, was a minute.
(23:32):
Everyone has a minute.
Like imagine if you were ableto give like I would kind of
just notice.
For me, stress and anxiety isusually like a head spinning
moment, like I feel like myhead's kind of like a top and
it's going around and around.
I actually kind of feel dizzyand I and I usually can't get my
brain and my thoughts to slowdown and so, like some somatic
(23:52):
things I've learned in the past,is like taking my hands and
putting them on top of my headlike this, to kind of ground my
head, my crown of my head aswell as my sacral and like
everything else, like lower myroot, but then also taking a few
short minutes, and I can evendo this head on my hands thing
while I'm in a meeting withsomebody.
They don't know what it is, youknow they're not aware of what
(24:13):
I'm doing.
They just think maybe I'm likefeeling a little extra confident
.
Put my hands over my head.
But that little bit of time,even just giving yourself that
minute, it's such a gift in themoment and you can take more of
those little moments than whatyou realize.
And I think once you realize itand put it in your toolbox and
you can use it.
I used to do it even when I wasstarting to feel a bit weary.
(24:34):
Around two, three o'clock Iwould normally go and grab a
coffee, which would just kind ofthen throw me into insomnia.
For the next upcoming night Istarted doing like a quick five
minute meditation in one ofthose little rooms and that was
like better than any cup ofcoffee.
I felt more, everything lookedclearer, I felt more clear
headed, I felt more grounded andit really, really helped me
(24:55):
start to learn how to trulylisten to my body so that you
know when I'm in moments andtimes of stress or conflict, I
know how to sort of take care ofand soothe myself, which is
just such a great tool to have.
So thanks for demonstrating.
I'm really glad that you sharedthat with us.
That's one of my favoritepractices, too, is the body scan
.
I used to actually use it tohelp my kids get my kids to bed
(25:16):
at night too, so if you strugglewith insomnia, it's a great
practice for that as well.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
Wonderful.
Yes, it works really well.
And I'd like to give anotherquick tip, especially those who
are working and you're inmeetings and things come up in
meetings, right.
So I love this box breathingbecause you can do it anytime,
anywhere.
No one really sees it.
They see you breathing, they dothat anyway, yeah.
So it's a very quick.
You can just take in a breathfor four counts and just breathe
(25:41):
in for four counts One, two,three, four.
Hold for four One, two, three,four.
Exhale for four.
One, two, three, four.
Exhale for four.
One, two, three, four and thenhold for four One, two, three,
(26:03):
four.
So when you feel anxiety comingup or when you feel nervous, if
you have to speak up or if youfeel you know for reason
anything is, you know the personcomes.
There's always that one personthat stresses everyone right you
can start doing these things,and I was coming a little fast.
You can even do it a little bitslower, sure, but that just
(26:26):
changes your whole physiologywithin your body and calms you
down.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
Yes, yes, I love the doing the double deep breath.
Play around with your breath, Ithink, and look at different
like.
I think that one box breathingis great.
I don't know where I got this,if it was just something I
played around and found out formyself, but I call it the double
deep breath, where I takeshallow breaths in, I realized.
So it was box breathing.
Sometimes I feel like I'msuffocating, so I do like a big
(26:52):
double breath in and then a hugeexhale, and then double breath
in and then a huge, and it'slike all of a sudden I, just
like you said, I feel lighter, Ifeel easier.
And I think all these things areso important because you know
we're starting to learn that,like stress, trauma, all these
things, it imprints on our DNA,like there's science out there
that's showing like it is deeplyaffecting our body.
(27:15):
It's not just our brain thataffects our body.
Our body is impacting our brain,so much so that, like your
heart rate, if I was toartificially inflate your heart
rate and make it go up, yourbrain would start to go into a
panic, thinking something waswrong.
Because the brain's response ishow do we work this to kind of
get it back to where it needs tobe.
So anybody who's ever had anykind of like heart tests know
(27:37):
what I'm talking stress testsknows what I'm talking about and
that's why it's like I think ifwe realize if you could slow
your heart rate, you canactually slow your brain down
and that's, I think, where thebreathing, the breathing and the
science behind taking a breathis so, so helpful to know.
All right, for my next question, you know I wanted to dig in
more to the fact that you knowyou've helped a lot of women
(27:57):
take their stories and move theminto things like bestselling
books and brands, a lot ofpersonal transformation.
I'm curious if there's anypatterns that you've noticed in
the women who've successfullyshifted from kind of this place
of just desperation and burnoutto something that was
sustainable and looked likesuccess for them on their terms.
Speaker 2 (28:18):
Yes, great question, amy.
Yes, so the things that I'venoticed, right, they're very
successful women, and these arethe kind of women that, if you
looked at them, you would notthink that they've had anything
else going behind.
Right, the low confidence thatthey had, the low self-esteem,
but they knew they were meantfor more and that's why they had
(28:40):
even stepped into personaldevelopment.
They knew that they had a giftthat they wanted to give.
They no longer wanted to keepit within.
So one was they were sick andtired of being sick and tired
and sick and tired of being inthat position, right, right, so
they took the courageous stepsto be there.
So the pattern that I've noticedwas that we they were not
(29:03):
taking ownership of their ownlife and their story.
Right, we were upset that we'vehad this difficult life or we
did not have this difficult life.
You need to own your story,even if, like me, I didn't have
much control over my life fromthe beginning.
I wasn't able to make a lot ofdecisions, right, but I had to
own my story, saying, okay,whatever it is, this is my story
(29:26):
, it's mine and I have to acceptit.
So I think we're always livingoutside of our story.
So I think we're always livingoutside of our story.
Yes, so they accepted whateverresponsibility they had,
whatever, however it was, andthen they were ready to decide
okay, now I can create what Iwant.
Yes, right.
(29:47):
So they had to really get intune with what is it that they
want?
What kind of a life do theywant to have?
They are the creators, right,it's so.
Understanding that and takingthat ownership and then picking
and choosing it's life's like abuffet right, you can create
what you want.
How do you want it?
And then just stepping into that, many times it's felt like you
(30:10):
know they're going forward, butit also felt like you're taking
10 steps forward and taking 10steps back yeah, right, or
you're taking 10 steps forwardand you're going two steps back
and that's part of the processthat is going to happen.
So, understanding that is partof the process and just keep
moving forward.
So, even though, if you see thecurve right, even though you're
(30:31):
moving upwards and you'refalling back, the fallback is
not as it's not to the beginning, right, yeah, it's just a
little bit.
Yeah, right, so you still haveprogressed.
So that's what I've helped themreally see is that when they're
falling back, there's stillmuch ahead.
They're not at the beginning,yeah, and and taking small
(30:52):
intentional steps right, we tryto do.
Like me, I try to do everythingat once and it's just not
possible.
Right, you want to take smallsteps?
Right?
This is a Kaizen approach thatI teach all the time.
Yes, right, it's small,incremental steps that you can
do daily.
You do the things you can doright from where you are.
I think sometimes we mistake totry to do everything else.
(31:15):
Right, what the other person isdoing, and you have to be.
They started being reallyhonest with themselves, right,
really authentic, finding whoyou really are and then showing
up that way.
You're a woman becoming, you'rebecoming into the greatness
(31:35):
you're meant to be.
You're already great, butyou're becoming and stepping
into your next phase, your next,your next chapter, right?
So, um, sometimes, in order tobecome that, you have to start
living in that way today, right?
So these are the patterns thatI've noticed with these women
(31:57):
right, taking ownership of theirstory, believing it's an
amazing story.
However, it is right, believingit's your story and you are
great just the way you are.
You don't need to changeyourself.
180 degrees.
Speaker 1 (32:12):
Yeah, don't pretend to be somebody else.
Speaker 2 (32:14):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Discover if you are as humans.
There's so much depth to usright.
You are a mom, you are a sister,you are a wife, you are a
warrior.
Right, you are yourself too.
There's so many differentaspects of us, of ourselves, yes
(32:34):
, so we get to be all of that,and they can be very different
too.
It doesn't have to be.
You know.
So many times people have toldme, sima, this is who you are,
this is how you are.
I was like no, that's the partyou see from your experience and
from your bias.
Also, people see us throughtheir own filters, just like we
(32:55):
see others through our ownfilters.
Don't let those filters impactyou.
You know who you are, you knowwho you want to be, and write it
down.
Write it down, post iteverywhere if you need to, and
it's okay, you can do all ofthat.
And it's okay to fall back.
You're going to fall.
You're okay to fall back.
You're going to fall.
You're going to get upset.
(33:16):
You're going to feel like youhaven't achieved anything.
It's all part of the process.
Speaker 1 (33:20):
I love this so much.
I think you know everyonedeserves to fall in love with
themselves.
As weird and conceited as thatmight sound.
It's like no, you're the onlyperson who is going to know you
for your entire life literallyis you and it's like you have to
be your own best friend and Ilove this idea of you know a lot
of who you are starts with whoyou were, and I found that
(33:43):
through a lot of like personaldevelopment and self-awareness
and being open and more honestand sharing like yeah, I'm a
first generation kid too, so Irelate a lot to the things that
you're saying, but I also grewup in a trailer park at a family
that didn't have a lot of money.
I'm also the first born.
There's so much that goes intowho I am now and how I respond
to things now, because who I waswhen I was seven or eight years
(34:04):
old and if you've forgottenyourself in that kind of
childlike state, there's a lotof you that you've left behind
and I think having thatvulnerability and self-awareness
I think one it opens up doorsfor you, gives you kind of like
a roadmap to know you know thepath that you're on and where
maybe you want to go, and Ithink that's another thing too
right.
I think we often look at I lovethat, your advice, and I love
(34:27):
the Kaizen work as well, becauseit is we often look at the
summit and like where we want tobe without just even looking
where we're taking the next step, and it's like how do you ever
plan to get there if you justdon't take that first small,
tiny step?
Like focus on the steps andwhere your feet are now and then
occasionally look up at thesummit and remind yourself what
you're striving for.
But and I also I'm always goingto remember that image too,
(34:50):
seema, thank you of like, evenwhen you fall backwards, you
it's, it's, it's so few stepsless than where for how far
you've come.
So really celebrating thosesuccesses and looking at that.
And every time you fall back,it's like that's a lesson, and
so now you're growing even more.
So really, the only way is up,but it has to start with you.
Nobody's going to be able to dothis work for you.
(35:12):
So, listeners, I'm sorry.
As wonderful as advice Asima isgiving you, and again working
with somebody like her, like acoach, to keep you accountable
and to help you figure out likewhat roadmaps might look like,
that's all great too, but at theend of the day, she's not going
to do it for you.
You got to do the hard work.
Speaker 2 (35:27):
You have to take the step.
Yeah, it's scary, it's hard.
Yeah, know it's scary, it'shard.
Yeah, know that it's possible.
Yeah, you reminded me of myfavorite quote, uh amy, by laozu
the journey of a thousand milesstarts with the first step.
Yes, absolutely, and it'salways about the next step.
It's not about 10 steps later,it's just about next step.
(35:48):
So you don't need to knowanything at all today.
You just need to know what isyour next step.
Speaker 1 (35:54):
Yes, I love it Absolutely.
Yeah, make it manageable, makeit doable.
It's going to be those aregoing to be, the kinds of wins
that keep you moving versusholding you back.
All right, let's talk aboutanother popular common theme
around burnout, and that'sboundaries.
And that word makes a lot ofambitious women uncomfortable.
How do you help your clientscreate boundaries that protect
(36:14):
their energy without feelinglike they're limiting their
potential?
Speaker 2 (36:19):
Well, the first is, you know, sometimes we're
meeting with people and makingcertain decisions at a time
that's not really conducive tous, right?
So, first is knowing when isthe best part of the day for you
to do certain things, right, ifyou're a morning person, you
might want to have morningmeetings.
That's when you're active themost right?
Yeah, so, knowing andunderstanding that.
(36:41):
So, if you know you need tomake certain decisions, you know
important decisions have it bearound the time that you are the
most active and energized,right?
Okay, um, that's one thing.
Also, these things work aroundyour cycle, yes, your menstrual
cycle too.
(37:01):
Um, so, if we can plan yourwork around that as well, so
maybe take more planning kind ofwork, uh, things that requires
you to be alone and think youknow to do it around that time.
I know it's not always possible, but if those who can?
(37:24):
that is the best way to do thatright.
I love it, and it's a practiceof getting to say no right, and
you don't have to say no in that.
No, no right.
If you need to, you know, startsaying maybe that you're busy
or that you're double booked oryou already have previous
(37:45):
commitment, because we tend todo a lot of things that we don't
really want to out ofobligation, right.
But you have to protect yourenergy first.
So ask yourself is thisactivity going to give me energy
?
If not, then politely decline.
If you can do something withthe person you like, the person
(38:07):
you want to do something atmaybe a better time, then you
know, do that, yeah, um, for isyou know, when we say boundaries
, it just maybe give it anotherword that feels better for you.
Oh, I like that idea yeah, youknow.
yeah, maybe me time, this is metime.
Right, schedule those things inyour calendar, yeah, um, or you
(38:30):
call it your sacred time.
Oh, I like that too, but wealso have to start filtering out
the people in our lives thatare not giving us that.
I had to do that, and I had todo that with family members too,
and that's not easy to do.
I can't even imagine having todo that with your immediate
family right.
(38:51):
But if you need to do that toprotect yourself, maybe even for
some time, some people can beout forever.
Some people can be out for afamily right.
But if you need to do that toprotect yourself, maybe even for
some time, some people can beout forever.
Some people can be out for aseason right.
Whatever you need Is to youknow this is really to honor
yourself, so is it.
Do you need five minutes tohave your coffee alone, right,
with your kids?
I used to tell my kids mommy'staking time out.
Speaker 1 (39:15):
Yeah, oh, I love it Because they're taking time out.
Right, because their mommy'staking time out.
It's like oh mom's in trouble.
Speaker 2 (39:20):
Even she's putting herself in time out.
Speaker 1 (39:23):
You know it's so funny.
That just took me back to amoment when I think it was my
daughter.
At one point she was like fouror five years old and she was
wanting something and we werebickering about it and I
couldn't negotiate out of it, Icouldn't distract her to
something else and finally she'slike, well, I'm going to do
this and then you're going to goto jail.
I was like, oh, please, send meto jail.
All I have to do is lay around,read books.
(39:44):
People will give me food.
I don't have to clean up afteranybody.
I was like, yes, please send me.
Might be a sign you need somerest if jail sounds good.
Yes, but yeah, I so agree.
I love your advice on the cycle.
We.
I don't think we have this as apodcast episode.
I think it was a webinarepisode during the pandemic
(40:04):
where we had a guest on who wasa specialist with women's cycles
and productivity and it waslike such a good unlock.
So those of you who arelistening, please take Seema's
advice Start doing some readingon your cycle and how productive
or unproductive you might be,you might be during those
moments of time in the month.
It is such a cool unlock, to beable to know your body and your
(40:28):
cycle and your system that well, to be able to leverage it in
your favor.
And I 100% agree with you.
Boundaries are really more thatchance of what is it that I need
to be able to leverage it inyour favor.
And I 100% agree with you.
Boundaries are really more thatchance of what is it that I
need to say no to so I can havemore of right.
So I always think about I'msaying no to this because I need
more of this right.
I get a request from the schoolto do some volunteer work.
I have volunteered for the lastseven, eight years.
(40:51):
Like it's like.
Sometimes you have to say nobecause I want more time,
quality time with my family,quality time with myself.
You know less sense ofresponsibility, accountability
on weeknights, because I'mrunning a business you know.
Think about what you want moreof, to help you validate the
reason why you're saying no andI think will give you a little
bit more courage when it comesto it.
(41:11):
And like, what are the otherdoors that you're opening by
saying no?
Yes isn't always theopportunity.
Sometimes no is the opportunity.
Speaker 2 (41:18):
Exactly.
And I say make a list of yournon-negotiables.
Sometimes we don't even knowthat.
And some of my clients havebeen really surprised when they
wrote down their non-negotiablesome of the things that was
actually there that they werenot honoring.
So saying no and settingboundaries is more like how are
you going to honor yourself?
So then you can be the bestversion of yourself, so you can
(41:42):
give to those people in yourcommunity that you want to give
to more of where they'llappreciate you.
That is a main key thing here.
Speaker 1 (41:52):
Yeah, and you're modeling such a great thing for
your family and for your kidsand for your partner and for
your coworkers.
I love that.
But there's one more thing thatI think a lot of women, once
they take action that kind offirst step into this is they
struggle with the idea of notgood enough or good enough.
How do you help those highachieving women who are trying
to embrace wellness practicesunderstand that they don't have
(42:14):
to be perfect in order to besustainable?
Speaker 2 (42:18):
Well, I show them.
I show them their own successthat they're forgotten.
So why?
Why do you feel you're not goodenough?
These are the things from yourlife that you're actually done
Right.
And if you were going to hiresomeone to do these kinds of
things, what kind of peoplewould you hire, right?
(42:39):
And then they started listing.
It's like honey, you alreadyhave all of this Right.
That's you, and and beyond that.
Speaker 1 (42:47):
Uh-huh, that reminder is so good.
I love that.
Speaker 2 (42:50):
It's okay.
So it's about taking a peekinto your own life and realizing
, because sometimes you don'tsee, because you're in the mode
of doing all the time, you don'tsee all the things you've done.
I did not realize that, healingmyself and going against the
doctors and listening to my owninner guidance was a huge thing.
(43:13):
Until I started sharing, peoplestarted saying that this is
extraordinary, yeah, right.
So just getting that validationthat it's extraordinary and
showing things from their ownlife reminds them that they are
good.
You're not good enough as towhose standards Right, right,
whose standards?
Your own own right.
So we're always setting uphigher standards for ourselves,
(43:36):
right?
So it's a reminder fromglimpses of their own life that
they are good enough, right?
Right and this was a surpriseto me perfection is actually a
low standard.
That is, you're trying to set abar of something that you're
never going to achieve, right,so it's really actually a lower
(44:00):
standard because you're justhiding and saying that I want to
be the best now, right?
It is in the action and in thedoing that you are the best if
you're getting certainrecognition.
I show them the recognition thatthey've received right.
The comments that they getright.
Sometimes, even the salary thatthey're getting.
(44:20):
If you were not good enough,you would not be having these
things.
Showing them where they aretoday is a great reminder that,
okay, I am good.
Who knows what good enough is?
On what metric are you lookingat, right?
Right yeah, what's thatmeasurement?
Exactly, exactly.
You are good.
That's why you have the thingsyou have now.
(44:42):
You are good if you're anentrepreneur.
Speaker 1 (44:47):
That's why you have the clients that you have, right
.
What you're speaking about, too, is just that practice of
gratitude, right, and stayingaware of what you have
accomplished.
It's celebrating having thosesmall wins and celebrating those
.
It's buying and giving yourselfflowers.
One other thing I think, too,that kind of does a lot of this
well outside of just socialconditioning, right.
Women are conditioned to,basically, we are the doers, we
(45:07):
take care of everyone, we takecare of everything we nurture,
we take care of everything wenurture.
And you know, and even in theworkplace you know, doing for
women is sort of how they thinkthat they have to climb right,
like they have to be seen asproductive and doing, and then
they get dinged for not leadingbecause they're so busy in the
(45:28):
weeds and doing and we never getout of the weeds.
So I would say that's onelittle trap that's easy to fall
into outside of theperfectionism trap, but then
also the comparison trap.
Do you come across a lot ofthat when you're dealing and
talking with their women thatyou mentor and coach.
Speaker 2 (45:42):
Yes, yes, they do like to compare.
But you know, when we'relooking at any statistics and
data, especially at work this isfrom my project management side
right we always say you can'tcompare apples and oranges.
Yes, you have to compare appleto apple right or orange to
(46:05):
orange.
So if you're comparing someone,you have to make sure that
they've come from the same exactbackground Right and the same
exact life.
But that's impossible.
Even siblings have the same setof parents, but they are so
different, yeah, like even twins, you know, identical twins that
(46:29):
can even look alike, soundalike.
Speaker 1 (46:31):
Yeah, totally different.
Speaker 2 (46:32):
But their whole life is different because of the kind
of perspective they've taken,right?
Yeah, so you can, um I, you canlook up to women your admirer,
strive to be similar to them,right, but you can't really
compare.
It has to be apples to apples,right?
So that's, that's another wayof hiding.
Speaker 1 (46:55):
Oh yeah, Way to call that out, Seema.
Speaker 2 (46:59):
Yeah, it's a perfectionism comparison.
It's another way of hiding.
Okay, what are you comparing to?
Why you're not like that?
Or she has this part.
That's really great.
I love to.
I strive for the to speak theway Michelle Obama speaks.
I like the way she speaks,right, she's to the point, she
(47:19):
comes across very elegant andpolished and she's speaking the
truth.
Yeah, okay, I'm never going tospeak just like her, right, but
that's healthy, right, if Istart comparing myself with
michelle obama right I'm gonnadrive myself crazy, absolutely
(47:39):
well, and I agree, I love thatit's such a good call.
Speaker 1 (47:42):
It's what you're hiding behind, um.
But I also tell myself oftenfollow your envy.
It's showing you what you want.
Oftentimes when we see thingsand others that we don't have,
the reason you're feelingjealous at all is not because
you just don't have it.
It's like, oh, I'm notacknowledging a want that I have
.
Okay, well, I want to speaklike Michelle Obama.
I want.
That means I want to be a moreeloquent speaker.
(48:03):
That means I need to do somereading and some research, maybe
start to find practices orplaces I can learn to be a
better speaker.
You know, and you're right,you're never going to be exactly
, because it's not apples toapples.
But you can at least then kindof separate yourself from the
comparison and the jealousy andsay, oh, there's just something
here that I'm wanting, that I'mnot acknowledging for myself,
(48:26):
that I.
Again, it comes back to you,right, you have to be the
accountable, responsible one tothen take action, because just
me sitting around being jealousof somebody is not going to move
the needle for me personally.
Speaker 2 (48:36):
Right and you make a good point, ask yourself why am
I comparing myself to thisperson?
What does she have that I don'tRight?
What is that trigger?
What is it triggering within me?
So maybe it is something thatyou have that you're not
acknowledging, that's dormantand that's ready to come out.
Yeah, there are differentaspects of us that are ready to
(48:59):
come out at different times whenwe are ready.
Speaker 1 (49:03):
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, I agree with thatwholeheartedly for sure.
So you know, we've talked alittle bit about perfectionism
and this idea of like being goodenough, or am I doing this all
right?
You know, ritual is kind of abig part of wellness, right,
it's a practice.
We say it's a practice becauseyou're not showing up to win the
game, you're just showing up to, you know, get a little bit
(49:23):
better each time.
How should our listenersapproach?
Or how has, uh, how should ourapproach to wellness evolve,
seeing as how you're just whatyou said just said evolve as our
careers and life circumstanceschange, because inevitably,
everything right, the one thingthat's inevitable is change.
So how do we work through thatand continue with our rituals?
Speaker 2 (49:43):
A ritual is it can be very simple, right, right, it
doesn't have to be verycomplicated.
Um, you know, like in themorning, what I do.
I wake up in the morning and,before I even get out of bed, I
think of three things that I amreally excited about, or the
three things I'm grateful for.
Grateful word doesn't reallywork for me, so I say appreciate
(50:06):
, okay, yeah, okay.
So what are the three things Iappreciate?
And then I, I make this tea, Ihave tea, and then I do some
kind of exercise.
I like variety, so I'll go fora walk or I'll do Tai Chi or I
(50:27):
will do yoga, whatever the moodI I asked my body okay, body,
what do you want to do today?
What do you need?
Right, yeah, A hundred percent.
So, um, as I'm doing thesethings, I meditate at the same
time in the floor.
I'm like very present, right.
Speaker 1 (50:41):
Very present in the moment.
Speaker 2 (50:43):
There are times that I will sit and do meditation
separately.
I meditate quite a bit too orsometimes I just turn on my
favorite song.
It could be a spiritual song,it could be something from my
faith, or it could be somethingthat I want to dance to my
favorite song.
Right, yeah, and I allow thattime, the first hour of the day,
(51:08):
just to be for myself, and thenI also have like a nighttime
routine.
The same way you know.
I'll turn off the tv, turn offeverything, get off social media
.
An hour or two hours before Imight have tea, if I feel like
it, I go in the bedroom, dim thelights and spend time there
(51:32):
before I actually go to bed.
Sometimes I do bedtime yoga andsometimes I meditate before I
go to bed.
Sometimes, if I need, sometimes, I do it.
Especially I have a podcast too.
So in between the meetings, inbetween, my clients and before a
(51:52):
podcast, I just center myself.
I'll do breathing two minutemeditation before my next thing
and I'm able to be a hundredpercent present.
So it doesn't have to be, itcan be just one thing.
Maybe you just have tea byyourself, maybe sit, have tea
out in the nature, out in nature, yeah.
(52:12):
So these are things that bringyou a peace, that bring you joy.
It can be.
I also like to have tea with myhusband every morning.
Mm-hmm, we have thatconversation.
Sometimes it's not tea,sometimes it's just a very long
hug, yeah Right, so think of thethings that you want to do that
(52:33):
brings you joy, that brings youpeace.
It gives you energy to you know, start, start your day or end
your day or anywhere in between,but it's something that you
would do on a regular basis.
Speaker 1 (52:46):
Yeah, I love that idea of the listening because as
you become more in tune, I'vedone this now even when I'm
working out, because I'm over 40now and you know I was last
weekend I was gardening and wehave like a dug in driveway
that's on the hillside and it'sgot walls on either side and I
thought I would be all stealthlike and just jump off the wall
(53:09):
onto the ground after likepulling a bunch of weeds, and
like my knee did not agree withthat move at all, and so it's
one of those things I'm likeokay, well, tomorrow I'm going
to ice it, I'm going to elevatethem and do the things I'm
supposed to do.
Take some time and I'll getsome rest, because clearly
jumping off of little three,four foot walls is not a thing
anymore after 40, right.
But listening to my body andthe rest of the week, I kind of
(53:31):
gradually moved into like Idon't even always stick with the
same workout.
I might wake up one morning andI'm like I need to go at it, I
need to go hard on a spin classand just get all this
frustration out.
And other times I'm like youknow what?
I just need to do some yoga,maybe some yin, where I'm going
to be in a pose for threeminutes.
That's also put ground support,because my body needs the extra
help and support right nowbecause I'm hurting and there's
(53:53):
just something to that.
So it's like there's so manylittle ways, even unplanned,
that you can kind of bring thatattention and awareness and
self-care.
And I think everything you'retalking about with the morning
and evening rituals are sohelpful for regulating your
nervous system and I think thething that's really helped me
(54:13):
being in a household with afamily is sharing those
expectations of like listen,this is mom's downtime.
Like you said, I'm puttingmyself on a timeout.
I love that Sharing thoseexpectations and upholding those
boundaries with your family isso important because it's so
easy to let the interruptionscome in.
But what you're talking about,too, really gives you that time
and ability to be present andgosh, what a gift to be like.
(54:34):
I've been sitting sometimes atmy kids' sports events and I
used to be on my phone checkingwork, stressing about work,
thinking about work, completelymissing the moment.
And because of some of thesepractices you're talking about
and because of wonderful coacheslike you, seema, I have been
able to just sit and enjoy andbe there for my kids and like be
present in the moment and watchall of these amazing little
(54:55):
things happen as their livesunfold, and that if you don't do
it for anything else, folks doit for that.
Being present is just the bestgift.
Speaker 2 (55:05):
We're always living in the future or in the past.
Right, you have to start livingin the present, because the
present is what creates yourfuture.
If you're happy right now, yournext minute and your future is
going to be just like that, andwhen things happen, life is
going to happen.
Right, people are going to comeback and say, Tima, I've been
(55:26):
happy every single day, but thisthing has happened.
Speaker 1 (55:28):
Life is going to life right.
So people are going to comeback and say I've been happy
every single day, but this thinghas happened life is going to
life, absolutely, life is goingto life, but then it's going to
help you.
Speaker 2 (55:34):
You won't read, you'll respond to it versus
react to it.
Yeah, and that's very different.
Those two things are verydifferent, right, you'll be able
to be more centered now myfamily's, like world is falling
apart around us and I'm stillvery calm and calm.
Yesterday I was on a phone callwith one of my team members and
(55:56):
my husband had already gone tobed, but it was something I had
said several times and explainedvery nicely.
But he could hear thedifference in my tone.
I wasn't upset, but I was firm,right, but because they're so
used to me being so level-headedand, you know, calm no matter
(56:17):
what happens, yeah, just thatfirmness in my voice.
He could tell and he asked meabout it this morning what
happened, right, so people start, you know, noticing all of
these things too yeah, so evenjournaling some people like
journaling, having a practice ofjournaling, yeah, at any time
of the day.
(56:37):
They sometimes even think it'sonly in the morning or it's
whatever works for you.
Yes, right, anything we'retalking about, I've said
something different.
Amy said something different toit.
It's all about experimenting.
Everyone experiments.
Your doctors are experimenting.
That's what I noticed andthat's why I started experiment.
It's like it's my life, right?
Why do they have the right toexperiment on me?
(56:57):
Absolutely, and so it's abouttrying different things,
exploring different things andseeing what it is that you like.
People think it's weird talkingto your body, but your body
knows best, right?
Yeah, your body knows best.
It knows what it wants.
So if you just startcommunicating and saying
sometimes I say, good morningSeema, good morning body, how,
(57:19):
how's today?
You know, what do you want todo?
What are we going to do today?
Right, even from people thinkthis is strange.
Even from the outfits I'm goingto wear, yeah, and you know, on
those days I always look andfeel the best I love it.
Speaker 1 (57:34):
I mean talk about decision fatigue there for
clothes.
Oh, that's really cool, I'mgonna play around with that too.
I think, yeah, just staycurious, get playful and know
that, like there's no one rightanswer, it's really about
exploring and finding the rightanswer for you.
I have loved, loved thisconversation so much.
Simo, we're coming close totime now, so I want to just give
our live listening audience alittle nudge.
Let them know that they aremore than welcome to drop
(57:55):
questions into the chat if theyhave any.
As we get ready to do that, Iam going to move us into our fun
little power round, which willbe kind of our fun quick
questions to get any more lastminute tips and advice to our
listeners.
All right, so what is yourgo-to five minute wellness
ritual when you're having achaotic day?
Speaker 2 (58:18):
I exercise on the when, when, especially when it's
chaotic day.
Yeah, because I know I'm goingto be a little extra stressed.
So I will exercise.
Either I'll do like a like ahit kind of exercise or I'll go
for a walk.
I have a beach near me.
I'll walk to the beach and I'llbreathe in that sea air and
(58:42):
then come back, so that is mybest thing to do.
We didn't talk about this asmuch, but what you eat is also
going to impact how you feelright.
So I am a hundred percent allabout healthy eating, whole food
eating and using supplements toreally help balance that.
Sometimes, depending on ifyou're traveling and you're
(59:05):
working, you're not always ableto feel your body with the best
options.
Yeah, out there.
So having the supplementsreally, really, and ahead and
supplements I agree you willnotice the kind of food that you
put in.
You will notice I can feel thatI'm feeling peace yeah, or that
I'm feeling uh stressed soespecially junk food.
You know that's going to addstress to it.
Speaker 1 (59:26):
Avoid junk food.
Speaker 2 (59:27):
Try to it's that's going to add stress to it.
Avoid junk food.
It's summer now.
Try to have more fruits andvegetables as much as possible.
Right, feel how caffeine isaffecting you.
Sometimes.
It's affecting you not in apositive way, right?
You know, look at all of thosethings.
That is going to be one of thehuge things of how you're going
(59:49):
to feel.
That's everything else wetalked about.
That's going to support you.
But if you're not eatinghealthy, that may not support
you as much, right, cause you'reit's you're it's coming from
within.
Yep.
So what you're putting in alsomakes a difference.
So I noticed when I eathealthier, especially on those
days like today, I made sure Ihad good protein breakfast
(01:00:11):
because I need to be able tosustain myself longer,
especially in the morning.
I'm doing interviews, so Iwanted to show up perfectly for
you guys.
So so, making sure that onthose days you're having those
kinds of meals.
So exercise meals, meditationfor those chaotic days is what I
(01:00:33):
do.
Speaker 1 (01:00:34):
I love it.
Thank you so much, seema.
This has been amazing.
This is such a great reminderfor all of us that success and
wellness aren't competingpriorities.
They really have to live inconjunction with one another and
you know they're reallypartners in creating a life
that's worth living.
(01:00:54):
So you know, helping others,the way that you're doing and
surviving and thriving withoutburnout, hopefully is going to
help.
You know a lot of people,including our listeners, write
their own success stories.
So you know again, folks thatare listening, please remember
that wellness isn't selfish.
It is a strategy, it is a wayto move forward.
It's not something that's goingto slow you down or hold you
back.
It's something that you have todo.
Please, please, especially inthe world we're living in right
(01:01:14):
now, make sure that you aretaking care of yourself, and
then that'll fuel you to helptake care of and show up for
others.
All of you can check out andconnect with Seema on LinkedIn,
and don't forget to check outher Uplift Media website, where
she continues to helppurpose-driven entrepreneurs
transform their stories intomovements that matter.
Seema, thank you so much forjoining us today in the Power
(01:01:37):
Lounge.
This has all been so fantastic.
We really appreciate you andall the work that you're doing
for women.
Speaker 2 (01:01:43):
Thank you, Amy.
Thank you for giving me thisopportunity to talk to your
community.
Thank you, Amy.
Thank you for giving me thisopportunity to talk to your
community, and I just want tosay you know, if there's one
selfless thing you want to dofor your community, that's to
take care of yourself.
You have an amazing story.
Create what you want, createthe life that you want and share
it.
Speaker 1 (01:02:04):
I love it.
All right, everyone.
Thank you so much for joiningus.
We appreciate you.
Speaking of self-care, you'regoing to have to go back and
listen to some of our classic,most amazing episodes.
We have close to 150 amazingstories from women who work in
digital marketing, advertisingand tech, as well as amazing
coaches and women who are justhelping us bring a more
well-rounded view to our worldand our personal and
(01:02:26):
professional growth with theTogether Digital Power Lounge.
I'm on vacation for the nexttwo Fridays, so I'll be spending
some time by the beach with myfamily.
Appreciate all of our amazingteam at Hercast Media for being
here for us and supporting usFor all of you.
Until then, we hope you keeplistening, Check out past
episodes, Check out Seema'swebsite.
(01:02:46):
Connect with her on LinkedIn.
Until next time, we're excitedto see you all with us here back
in the Power Lounge.
Until then, keep asking, keepgiving and keep growing.
We'll see you next time.
Bye, everybody.
Hello everyone and welcome to our weekly power
lounge.
This is your place to hearauthentic conversations from
those who have power to share.
My name is Amy Vaughn and I amthe owner and chief empowerment
officer of Together Digital, adiverse and collaborative
community of women who choose toshare their knowledge, power
and connections.
You can join the movement attogetherindigitalcom.
(00:30):
And today we're exploring atopic that hits close to home
for so many high achieving womenwithin our community and beyond
how to succeed withoutsacrificing your health or your
soul, as it feels like sometimes, and I am thrilled to introduce
and welcome Seema Giri.
She is the founder andinternational bestselling author
(00:52):
and transformational expert inwellness and leadership, who
truly embodies what it means torise from challenge to change.
As the founder of Uplift Mediaand the CGO at Uplift or Upbuild
Global Inc.
Seema has spent over 30 yearshelping purpose-driven
entrepreneurs transform theirpersonal stories into
(01:14):
best-selling books andpowerhouse brands.
But what makes her storyparticularly powerful is her own
personal journey, overcoming adebilitating illness.
She has dedicated her life toempowering others to thrive
without burnout.
Seema has guided hundreds ofwomen to publish, to speak, to
lead with confidence, and hermission goes far beyond business
(01:36):
success.
She is here to help us rewritethe rules of what success looks
like, where wellness isn't anafterthought but a
non-negotiable.
It is a non but anon-negotiable strategy for
long-term achievement.
So, friends, listeners, if youare struggling with a demanding
career, personal life, thedesire to do more, or maybe all
(01:56):
of the above, today'sconversation is going to give
you the tools to shift fromburnout to balance.
So please join me in welcomingSeema Gary to the Power Lounge.
Welcome, seema.
Speaker 2 (02:08):
Hi Amy, I'm so happy to be here in this Power Lounge
with you and with your listeners.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
Absolutely.
And those of you who are herewith us live, live listeners.
We love you and we appreciateyou for taking the time to be
here with us in real time.
Use the chat, ask questions ifyou have them.
I promise you we will get tothem before the end of the
conversation.
And for those of you who aren'tlistening live, just know that
you always can.
You can find our events onEventbrite.
(02:34):
Also, be sure to follow us onYouTube and anywhere you stream
your podcasts.
All right, seema, let's getinto this.
I'm excited for thisconversation.
These questions, I think, are alot of the questions that are
swirling around in all of ourbusy little brains.
But first I want to start withyour journey.
(02:56):
As I mentioned in your bio, youexperienced a debilitating
illness, and then that tobecoming a wellness and
leadership expert.
It's pretty remarkable.
What was the turning point foryou that made you realize that
success needed to be redefined,not just for you, but the women
that you serve, Wow.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
So you know, years ago this is 27 years to be exact
I was struggling with just thegeneral kind of tiredness and
just exhausted and thatsometimes felt like maybe coming
down with a cold, sometimes itfelt like a flu, sometimes it
(03:31):
just felt like I was beingoverworked, right, but I didn't
really pay much attention atthat time.
I was in my 20s then and I wasnewly married, had a great job
partying over the weekend, so Istarted cutting things out, you
know, stop the partying, justfocus on working and coming home
(03:52):
.
But still things weren'tgetting better.
So you know, as women, we arealways putting things off and
not going to the doctor rightaway.
We'll try everything else.
So finally, I went to the doctorand they did their tests and
everything came out normal.
So they said you know, you'rejust depressed or you have you
know.
So I kept going to more doctorsand.
(04:12):
I kept hearing the same thing.
But now, amy, I was in extremepain.
I couldn't drive, I was in painall the time and it's like you
look perfectly healthy.
Healthy from the outside, maybea little tired, but yeah, it
felt like a tsunami was going ininternally.
It took six years to finally bediagnosed correctly.
(04:34):
Wow, with three types ofautoimmune issues um a
hypothyroid, rheumatoidarthritis and fibromyalgia.
oh my.
And before and before that, allthe doctors were saying it's in
your head, it's, you know, it's.
You're a woman.
I was, I felt, dismissed, rightBecause I'm a woman, and but
(04:56):
that there was a little voiceinside me that said you know,
just, there's something there,keep going.
So finally, after beingdiagnosed with these three types
of autoimmune issues, put me on30 medications.
Wow, which was still.
You know, the pain was a littlebit better, but there were so
many side effects and justtaking this kind of medicine was
not easy and just maintaining aregular work was also very hard
(05:20):
.
Um, then I had my son.
The doctor said you know, see,my pregnancy changes your entire
hormone and body and so if youhave, you know, if you start
having children, that might helpyou.
But, then I was at a moralconflict here, amy, because one
(05:41):
I did not want kids, and thattoo at that time, right, and
then I didn't want kids, andthat too at that time.
Speaker 1 (05:49):
And then I didn't want to use a child as an
experiment and then not be happyloving a child and the child is
going to suffer.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
So I had to struggle with this emotional and moral
conflict and I was like you know, this is not fair, I'd rather
deal with the pain.
But I finally came to termsthat you know, this is something
that I would want and I wouldhonor the child and love the
child the best I could.
So the pregnancy helped.
I never felt better.
I released weight.
(06:16):
I only had the baby weight.
Pregnancy, the delivery was alittle difficult and I think
because of that, soon after twomonths after my delivery, I
became bedridden, wow, and Icouldn't enjoy my baby.
I couldn't hold him, I couldn't.
You know, the joys of newmotherhood was like, felt like
was taken away from me.
(06:37):
And the doctors then said Seema, you know we can make you
comfortable, but I'm sorry, thisis how your life is going to be
for the rest of your life.
And I looked at them and I waslike, really, are you sure?
You know?
So got opinions, doctor afterdoctor, and they all said yes.
(07:00):
Then, amy, I did the only thingI could and I looked at my baby
and I said Then, amy, I did theonly thing I could and I looked
at my baby and I said no, thisis not the life you're going to
have.
He didn't come in this world.
I had a son.
He didn't come in this world tohave this kind of a life.
I said I'm going to do whateverI can to give you the best
possible life, and I made thatpromise to him and to me.
(07:21):
So I noticed that you know, aswomen women it's hard for us to
do something for ourselves, andit's okay if you can't do it for
yourself, but take an actionfor someone else that you love
so much.
So my child was my catalyst, myinspiration, and I started
listening more to myself.
Up to this point, although Iwas raised in the US, I'm from
(07:45):
an Indian family, and a verytraditional, conservative Indian
family.
Yeah, so I was.
I had a blueprint that I had tofollow and so I was told I
didn't, couldn't really use myown thoughts and feelings and
ideas and make my decisions.
Right up to this point, Ihadn't really made any major
decision, and now I was forcedto make my own decision.
(08:08):
Family and doctors were allsaying the same thing.
I had to cut out all that noise, go internal and say okay,
seema, what is it?
And I started listening to myintuition.
Then, when you make thosedecisions, the right people come
into your life.
I had a family friend livingclose by Veena Singla is her
(08:30):
name and she told me she saidSeema, put on your big girl
panties and start taking controlof your life and your health.
So the things that the doctorsaid nutrition is not going to
help much.
Exercise is not going to help.
Much exercise is not going tohelp much.
Those are the exact things thathelp.
So I started implementing wholefood nutrition.
I love it and within fourmonths uh, amy, I was up and
(08:54):
about.
I was able to take care ofmyself.
Six months later, I was able totake care of my son and really
start on that healing journey.
So it's really about what areyou fueling yourself with?
Right in terms of nutrition, interms of what your stories,
you're allowing it and who youare listening to and I find, as
(09:17):
women, we really listen toeveryone else around us.
Yes For ourselves.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Yes, I love that, seema.
Thank you for sharing thatvulnerable story.
And you know, it is true,there's no one coming to save us
and the answers are not outsideyou, they are absolutely within
you, like everything startsthere, the way you see the world
, the way the world sees you,all of it, and I love that you
shared that because it's funny.
As soon as you started speakingabout your symptoms, my first
(09:43):
thought was autoimmune.
I can't tell you how many womenI know that are dealing with
autoimmune issues and it doestake anywhere from five to seven
years sometimes for them to bediagnosed.
This includes my own mom, andI've been her patient advocate
for over a decade, and soanytime someone starts to share
some things with me and it'sfunny because I get medical
professionals now will tell me,even as the vet.
Today I was talking to the vetfor my cat.
(10:05):
She's like are you in themedical profession?
I'm like no, I just I educatemyself, you know, on these
things because you know, and Iused to work in health care it's
so, it's so.
It's so fractional and peoplearen't talking to other people
and the systems are very broken,in my opinion, that it does
leave especially women and myown orities in a place where
(10:26):
they can either be misdiagnosed,mistreated or, you know, never
diagnosed and just told well,this is what life is, and it's
going to be suffering and no,there's nothing you can do,
which I love that you're like.
That is not an answer I'mwilling to accept.
No, and you're so right.
Kids, do you mess witheverything?
I think my foot grew by like ahalf size.
My eyesight changed, I actuallymy eyesight got better while I
(10:48):
was pregnant and I ended up witha astigmatism that went away as
soon as my kids came.
I had no clue that, like, thehormones and the things in your
body that are produced whilepregnant and after could do so
much to your physical body.
So I think this is a great callto you listeners.
You know who are.
You know having theseexperiences where you feel like
(11:09):
your, your feelings, yoursymptoms, all of these things
that are telling you likesomething is wrong.
You, just you have to keepadvocating for yourself and
wanting something more, becauseyou're right, you're doing it
for your kids, you're doing itfor your family and not just
yourself.
Right, you can't show up halfempty and a hollow shell of a
person, right?
It's just not the kind ofmother any of us would have
(11:31):
wanted.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
And that's the thing that.
The other thing that I want tobring out is eventually, you
want to move into doing it foryourself.
Yeah, now, at this point, thethings I'm doing doing, I'm
doing it for myself because youknow, especially if you have a
family and a community aroundyou, people don't do as they, as
you say, they do as you do, yes, so that is really important
(11:54):
too, and it all boils down, amy,to self-leadership.
How are you leading yourself?
And then why is anyone going tofollow you?
If you want to be leader, evenat the workplace, right, yes,
that's because you have the mom.
Title does not mean you're nota leader.
You're leading the mostimportant community ever,
(12:15):
because these children are goingto grow up to be leaders, and
how they behave and communicateand the things they do is going
to affect everybody.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
I love it.
Preach girl, all right, youknow I'm always in the mindset
of our listeners and our membersbecause you know I get to be in
work, close in community withthem and I know that.
You know it's not anintentional thing.
But oftentimes those who arehigh achievers where their busy
schedules like a badge of honorand use that as a reason not to
(12:44):
take the time that they need totake for themselves, how do you
help women recognize when theyhave crossed the line from
productive ambition to harmfulburnout?
Speaker 2 (12:55):
Well, you know, you start noticing things that
you're not getting as muchthings done, right, you are
frustrated.
You are tired.
You are irritated, right,things that may not bother you
start bothering you, right, Ilove being busy, I love having a
(13:17):
packed schedule because I feellike I am so much more
productive.
Then, right, but you're noteven machines.
You're not a machine, but evenmachines need downtime.
They need to be maintained,they need to have be oiled, they
need to have all it, just likeyour cars, right.
They won't give you that kindof mileage if you don't take
(13:39):
regular care.
That's how we are and for us,it's in the form of rest.
Right, and I think one of thereasons really is hard because,
um, we want to have it all.
And in order to have it all,you know we have to do certain
things.
And it also comes from cultureand your background, right, how
(14:00):
you've been raised.
In our culture, from the, fromthe period of those who came
here as an immigrant, we had tolead a very different life.
You know, for safety purposes,we had to be almost invisible,
work really hard, we did nothave time to rest and at that
time, if you did rest, you wereconsidered lazy, you were
(14:21):
considered not serious enoughabout your work.
So that builds that.
It's in part of our DNA, right?
So it's part of recognizingthose things.
Whose belief is it Right?
And then, what were the reasonswe were told back in the day,
and does that still apply today?
And it doesn't apply todayBecause things are different.
(14:42):
We are the next generation.
Yes, so you are allowed to rest.
Your body absolutely needs it,right?
You'll start seeing symptoms,like I did, and autoimmune
initial symptoms are verygeneric.
You could have anything.
You could be from nothing tohaving cancer, right, it's such
(15:03):
a big thing.
So you need to, you know, beyour own best friend as soon as
you start noticing anythingdifferent in your body.
Listen to your body.
Your body says things verysoftly.
I didn't start getting tired,just that in my 20s.
It's been happening over aperiod of time.
(15:24):
At that time I was a teenagerand I didn't know what it was
saying.
So, start listening to yourbody.
It might be, if you startnoticing a pattern, like every
time you're ready to ramp up,something happens and you're
slowing down.
Right, that was the biggestthing for me.
I'm ready to ramp up things andI'm ready to go, and then
(15:45):
something happens and I'm backto square one.
Things just like taking a fiveminute breather.
You know, just sit for fiveminutes and breathe, yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
That's hard.
For some people that's reallyhard and I would say, like start
with, like small doses, likeI've recommended.
Maybe in past episodes of like,during the pandemic, I was
trying to get back into mymeditation practice.
I had been meditating, doingyoga, since I was 18, like in
the 90s, before anybody wasreally talking about it and
doing it was trendy, and so forme it took me time, even having
(16:18):
practiced in the past, you know,20 years later to come back to
it In the past.
You know 20 years later to comeback to it.
I found walking meditations tobe really good and helpful
because I had that extra energythat I needed to get out, or
meditating after working out,somehow expending energy got me
into stillness a little biteasier.
So playing around and figuringout what works for you is great,
(16:38):
and I agree like stress is sucha big impact and can really
drive inflammation in the body,which then is like huge for
autoimmune right.
So if you are dealing withsomething autoimmune or even
hormonal based, you know again,those stressors cause you to
slow down and I really wantthose who are listening to
remember that rest is actually apart of productivity, right.
(17:01):
Like you said, that machine hasto shut down and it's not just
sleep, but it's quality sleep.
It's, you know, time doingnothing and being bored and
learning how to be in stillness,and it's not like you have to
be in a cave meditating for fivehours.
But, you know, finding thoselittle moments and points of
rest.
That's what's going to help youcarry you across the finish
line.
It's not going until your legscome out from underneath you
(17:24):
right like the rest is requiredto get to the finish line and
and if you don't like meditationor rest, think of this way.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
What brings you joy?
Do the things that brings youjoy.
Right, because you want to havefun.
Life is meant to be fun.
Yeah, yeah, that's actually the.
You're here to do something.
You're not here to struggle,and if you're struggling, then
that's probably not the area youneed to be focusing on.
These are signs, right, I hadno idea that struggle is a sign
(17:54):
that you're probably doingsomething that you're not meant
to do, because when you're doingsomething that you're meant to
do, it comes with ease, it flowseasily.
There are hard times, difficulttimes during that time right,
but you feel more joy, you feelmore energized.
So, everything you're doing,whether you're with people, do
you assess yourself?
(18:15):
Are these people giving meenergy?
Yeah, are they.
And the tasks you're doing?
Is this giving me energy?
Out now, we have so muchresources to outsource things.
Outsource them, right.
You can't outsource your health.
You have to take theresponsibility for it and take
responsibility.
You know people.
We keep saying you know this ishappening, this is happening,
(18:37):
this is happening, but we don'ttake that responsibility, that's
leadership take yourresponsibility and take action,
because we other people can bedoing things around us, but
we're allowing them to do itwith us, right?
Speaker 1 (18:53):
right.
Yeah, I love that lead leadyourself first and then allow
others to follow.
I love that so much, what youwere talking about a second ago,
though I think I want to bringit back to that for the next
question because I totallyrealize, as a former very busy,
very like in in my career, kindof weeds kind of person, I
literally was living in my headalone, my head, and like I was
(19:17):
might as well just been from theneck up for about 10 years.
You know, let's start talkingabout like reconnecting with
your body's wisdom as a guide.
You said something about.
You know let's start talkingabout like reconnecting with
your body's wisdom as a guide.
You said something about youknow paying attention to where
energy comes in, where energygoes, energy flows right.
So like where do I feel energy?
But then a lot of women they'relike I don't know, I really
don't feel anything from theneck down.
(19:39):
How can you help?
Or how have you helped womenwho've been living in their
heads for years kind of takethat first step into rebuilding
the connection with their bodyso they actually can pay
attention to the things thatbring them energy?
Because a lot of times you'llsay that and women are like I
don't know what that means,because I don't remember the
last time I felt anything againfrom like the neck down yeah,
(20:01):
yeah, those, the, the.
Speaker 2 (20:04):
I find that is usually when we're trying to not
feel things right.
I would like to, if it's okaywith you, amy.
Yeah, just take a real quickexercise right now, absolutely.
So.
Everyone is in their own safeplace, you can close your eyes,
take a deep breath in and justscan your body.
This is called a body scan.
(20:24):
You start from the top and justscan your body.
This is called a body scan.
You start from the top and youjust go down, start from your
head and just feel your face,your cheeks, take another deep
breath in and just go feel yourneck and you want to look.
For where do you feel any kindof sensation or any kind of pain
(20:46):
?
Right, you might feel pain, youmight feel stuckness, you might
feel maybe even some kind ofwarmth or heat.
As we scan the body now we'reat our chest and our upper
shoulders and arms.
See where you feel thatsensation Down to your stomach,
(21:15):
your middle of your back, yourarms.
In any place you feel any kindof stiffness, any kind of pain,
maybe any kind of pain, maybeany kind of heat, any kind of
sensation.
Everyone is different.
I want you to bring yourawareness to that spot and just
(21:36):
send your breath there.
Take a deep breath in, bringawareness of that particular
spot and send your breath there.
Take a few breaths and send itthere and continue scanning.
Now we're at our hips, ourbuttocks, go down to your thighs
(21:59):
, your knees, your calves andany time you feel any kind of
stiffness, a pain, somesensation, take a moment to
bring that to your awareness andsend a few deep breaths
(22:23):
directly to that spot.
And send a few deep breathsdirectly to that spot and you'll
notice that it's opening up alittle.
The pain may have seized alittle, the stiffness might be
less, the sensation might havegone away.
(22:44):
Now bring it down to yourankles and your feet.
So by doing this exercise, amy,this has been a great way for
people to start connecting andnoticing different parts of
their body where they're feeling.
A sensation or pain usuallycomes up as a pain.
Speaker 1 (23:12):
Yeah, I love that so much.
Hot tip for those of you whoare still in working office
environments One I apologize,you're having to be at a work
office every day.
That's hard sometimes nowwithout the flexibility, but I
used to actually go into thoselittle huddle like phone booth
rooms because they were privateand between meetings, and I mean
what you just took us throughthere, seema, was a minute.
(23:32):
Everyone has a minute.
Like imagine if you were ableto give like I would kind of
just notice.
For me, stress and anxiety isusually like a head spinning
moment, like I feel like myhead's kind of like a top and
it's going around and around.
I actually kind of feel dizzyand I and I usually can't get my
brain and my thoughts to slowdown and so, like some somatic
(23:52):
things I've learned in the past,is like taking my hands and
putting them on top of my headlike this, to kind of ground my
head, my crown of my head aswell as my sacral and like
everything else, like lower myroot, but then also taking a few
short minutes, and I can evendo this head on my hands thing
while I'm in a meeting withsomebody.
They don't know what it is, youknow they're not aware of what
(24:13):
I'm doing.
They just think maybe I'm likefeeling a little extra confident
.
Put my hands over my head.
But that little bit of time,even just giving yourself that
minute, it's such a gift in themoment and you can take more of
those little moments than whatyou realize.
And I think once you realize itand put it in your toolbox and
you can use it.
I used to do it even when I wasstarting to feel a bit weary.
(24:34):
Around two, three o'clock Iwould normally go and grab a
coffee, which would just kind ofthen throw me into insomnia.
For the next upcoming night Istarted doing like a quick five
minute meditation in one ofthose little rooms and that was
like better than any cup ofcoffee.
I felt more, everything lookedclearer, I felt more clear
headed, I felt more grounded andit really, really helped me
(24:55):
start to learn how to trulylisten to my body so that you
know when I'm in moments andtimes of stress or conflict, I
know how to sort of take care ofand soothe myself, which is
just such a great tool to have.
So thanks for demonstrating.
I'm really glad that you sharedthat with us.
That's one of my favoritepractices, too, is the body scan
.
I used to actually use it tohelp my kids get my kids to bed
(25:16):
at night too, so if you strugglewith insomnia, it's a great
practice for that as well.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
Wonderful.
Yes, it works really well.
And I'd like to give anotherquick tip, especially those who
are working and you're inmeetings and things come up in
meetings, right.
So I love this box breathingbecause you can do it anytime,
anywhere.
No one really sees it.
They see you breathing, they dothat anyway, yeah.
So it's a very quick.
You can just take in a breathfor four counts and just breathe
(25:41):
in for four counts One, two,three, four.
Hold for four One, two, three,four.
Exhale for four.
One, two, three, four.
Exhale for four.
One, two, three, four and thenhold for four One, two, three,
(26:03):
four.
So when you feel anxiety comingup or when you feel nervous, if
you have to speak up or if youfeel you know for reason
anything is, you know the personcomes.
There's always that one personthat stresses everyone right you
can start doing these things,and I was coming a little fast.
You can even do it a little bitslower, sure, but that just
(26:26):
changes your whole physiologywithin your body and calms you
down.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
Yes, yes, I love the doing the double deep breath.
Play around with your breath, Ithink, and look at different
like.
I think that one box breathingis great.
I don't know where I got this,if it was just something I
played around and found out formyself, but I call it the double
deep breath, where I takeshallow breaths in, I realized.
So it was box breathing.
Sometimes I feel like I'msuffocating, so I do like a big
(26:52):
double breath in and then a hugeexhale, and then double breath
in and then a huge, and it'slike all of a sudden I, just
like you said, I feel lighter, Ifeel easier.
And I think all these things areso important because you know
we're starting to learn that,like stress, trauma, all these
things, it imprints on our DNA,like there's science out there
that's showing like it is deeplyaffecting our body.
(27:15):
It's not just our brain thataffects our body.
Our body is impacting our brain,so much so that, like your
heart rate, if I was toartificially inflate your heart
rate and make it go up, yourbrain would start to go into a
panic, thinking something waswrong.
Because the brain's response ishow do we work this to kind of
get it back to where it needs tobe.
So anybody who's ever had anykind of like heart tests know
(27:37):
what I'm talking stress testsknows what I'm talking about and
that's why it's like I think ifwe realize if you could slow
your heart rate, you canactually slow your brain down
and that's, I think, where thebreathing, the breathing and the
science behind taking a breathis so, so helpful to know.
All right, for my next question, you know I wanted to dig in
more to the fact that you knowyou've helped a lot of women
(27:57):
take their stories and move theminto things like bestselling
books and brands, a lot ofpersonal transformation.
I'm curious if there's anypatterns that you've noticed in
the women who've successfullyshifted from kind of this place
of just desperation and burnoutto something that was
sustainable and looked likesuccess for them on their terms.
Speaker 2 (28:18):
Yes, great question, amy.
Yes, so the things that I'venoticed, right, they're very
successful women, and these arethe kind of women that, if you
looked at them, you would notthink that they've had anything
else going behind.
Right, the low confidence thatthey had, the low self-esteem,
but they knew they were meantfor more and that's why they had
(28:40):
even stepped into personaldevelopment.
They knew that they had a giftthat they wanted to give.
They no longer wanted to keepit within.
So one was they were sick andtired of being sick and tired
and sick and tired of being inthat position, right, right, so
they took the courageous stepsto be there.
So the pattern that I've noticedwas that we they were not
(29:03):
taking ownership of their ownlife and their story.
Right, we were upset that we'vehad this difficult life or we
did not have this difficult life.
You need to own your story,even if, like me, I didn't have
much control over my life fromthe beginning.
I wasn't able to make a lot ofdecisions, right, but I had to
own my story, saying, okay,whatever it is, this is my story
(29:26):
, it's mine and I have to acceptit.
So I think we're always livingoutside of our story.
So I think we're always livingoutside of our story.
Yes, so they accepted whateverresponsibility they had,
whatever, however it was, andthen they were ready to decide
okay, now I can create what Iwant.
Yes, right.
(29:47):
So they had to really get intune with what is it that they
want?
What kind of a life do theywant to have?
They are the creators, right,it's so.
Understanding that and takingthat ownership and then picking
and choosing it's life's like abuffet right, you can create
what you want.
How do you want it?
And then just stepping into that, many times it's felt like you
(30:10):
know they're going forward, butit also felt like you're taking
10 steps forward and taking 10steps back yeah, right, or
you're taking 10 steps forwardand you're going two steps back
and that's part of the processthat is going to happen.
So, understanding that is partof the process and just keep
moving forward.
So, even though, if you see thecurve right, even though you're
(30:31):
moving upwards and you'refalling back, the fallback is
not as it's not to the beginning, right, yeah, it's just a
little bit.
Yeah, right, so you still haveprogressed.
So that's what I've helped themreally see is that when they're
falling back, there's stillmuch ahead.
They're not at the beginning,yeah, and and taking small
(30:52):
intentional steps right, we tryto do.
Like me, I try to do everythingat once and it's just not
possible.
Right, you want to take smallsteps?
Right?
This is a Kaizen approach thatI teach all the time.
Yes, right, it's small,incremental steps that you can
do daily.
You do the things you can doright from where you are.
I think sometimes we mistake totry to do everything else.
(31:15):
Right, what the other person isdoing, and you have to be.
They started being reallyhonest with themselves, right,
really authentic, finding whoyou really are and then showing
up that way.
You're a woman becoming, you'rebecoming into the greatness
(31:35):
you're meant to be.
You're already great, butyou're becoming and stepping
into your next phase, your next,your next chapter, right?
So, um, sometimes, in order tobecome that, you have to start
living in that way today, right?
So these are the patterns thatI've noticed with these women
(31:57):
right, taking ownership of theirstory, believing it's an
amazing story.
However, it is right, believingit's your story and you are
great just the way you are.
You don't need to changeyourself.
180 degrees.
Speaker 1 (32:12):
Yeah, don't pretend to be somebody else.
Speaker 2 (32:14):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Discover if you are as humans.
There's so much depth to usright.
You are a mom, you are a sister,you are a wife, you are a
warrior.
Right, you are yourself too.
There's so many differentaspects of us, of ourselves, yes
(32:34):
, so we get to be all of that,and they can be very different
too.
It doesn't have to be.
You know.
So many times people have toldme, sima, this is who you are,
this is how you are.
I was like no, that's the partyou see from your experience and
from your bias.
Also, people see us throughtheir own filters, just like we
(32:55):
see others through our ownfilters.
Don't let those filters impactyou.
You know who you are, you knowwho you want to be, and write it
down.
Write it down, post iteverywhere if you need to, and
it's okay, you can do all ofthat.
And it's okay to fall back.
You're going to fall.
You're okay to fall back.
You're going to fall.
You're going to get upset.
(33:16):
You're going to feel like youhaven't achieved anything.
It's all part of the process.
Speaker 1 (33:20):
I love this so much.
I think you know everyonedeserves to fall in love with
themselves.
As weird and conceited as thatmight sound.
It's like no, you're the onlyperson who is going to know you
for your entire life literallyis you and it's like you have to
be your own best friend and Ilove this idea of you know a lot
of who you are starts with whoyou were, and I found that
(33:43):
through a lot of like personaldevelopment and self-awareness
and being open and more honestand sharing like yeah, I'm a
first generation kid too, so Irelate a lot to the things that
you're saying, but I also grewup in a trailer park at a family
that didn't have a lot of money.
I'm also the first born.
There's so much that goes intowho I am now and how I respond
to things now, because who I waswhen I was seven or eight years
(34:04):
old and if you've forgottenyourself in that kind of
childlike state, there's a lotof you that you've left behind
and I think having thatvulnerability and self-awareness
I think one it opens up doorsfor you, gives you kind of like
a roadmap to know you know thepath that you're on and where
maybe you want to go, and Ithink that's another thing too
right.
I think we often look at I lovethat, your advice, and I love
(34:27):
the Kaizen work as well, becauseit is we often look at the
summit and like where we want tobe without just even looking
where we're taking the next step, and it's like how do you ever
plan to get there if you justdon't take that first small,
tiny step?
Like focus on the steps andwhere your feet are now and then
occasionally look up at thesummit and remind yourself what
you're striving for.
But and I also I'm always goingto remember that image too,
(34:50):
seema, thank you of like, evenwhen you fall backwards, you
it's, it's, it's so few stepsless than where for how far
you've come.
So really celebrating thosesuccesses and looking at that.
And every time you fall back,it's like that's a lesson, and
so now you're growing even more.
So really, the only way is up,but it has to start with you.
Nobody's going to be able to dothis work for you.
(35:12):
So, listeners, I'm sorry.
As wonderful as advice Asima isgiving you, and again working
with somebody like her, like acoach, to keep you accountable
and to help you figure out likewhat roadmaps might look like,
that's all great too, but at theend of the day, she's not going
to do it for you.
You got to do the hard work.
Speaker 2 (35:27):
You have to take the step.
Yeah, it's scary, it's hard.
Yeah, know it's scary, it'shard.
Yeah, know that it's possible.
Yeah, you reminded me of myfavorite quote, uh amy, by laozu
the journey of a thousand milesstarts with the first step.
Yes, absolutely, and it'salways about the next step.
It's not about 10 steps later,it's just about next step.
(35:48):
So you don't need to knowanything at all today.
You just need to know what isyour next step.
Speaker 1 (35:54):
Yes, I love it Absolutely.
Yeah, make it manageable, makeit doable.
It's going to be those aregoing to be, the kinds of wins
that keep you moving versusholding you back.
All right, let's talk aboutanother popular common theme
around burnout, and that'sboundaries.
And that word makes a lot ofambitious women uncomfortable.
How do you help your clientscreate boundaries that protect
(36:14):
their energy without feelinglike they're limiting their
potential?
Speaker 2 (36:19):
Well, the first is, you know, sometimes we're
meeting with people and makingcertain decisions at a time
that's not really conducive tous, right?
So, first is knowing when isthe best part of the day for you
to do certain things, right, ifyou're a morning person, you
might want to have morningmeetings.
That's when you're active themost right?
Yeah, so, knowing andunderstanding that.
(36:41):
So, if you know you need tomake certain decisions, you know
important decisions have it bearound the time that you are the
most active and energized,right?
Okay, um, that's one thing.
Also, these things work aroundyour cycle, yes, your menstrual
cycle too.
(37:01):
Um, so, if we can plan yourwork around that as well, so
maybe take more planning kind ofwork, uh, things that requires
you to be alone and think youknow to do it around that time.
I know it's not always possible, but if those who can?
(37:24):
that is the best way to do thatright.
I love it, and it's a practiceof getting to say no right, and
you don't have to say no in that.
No, no right.
If you need to, you know, startsaying maybe that you're busy
or that you're double booked oryou already have previous
(37:45):
commitment, because we tend todo a lot of things that we don't
really want to out ofobligation, right.
But you have to protect yourenergy first.
So ask yourself is thisactivity going to give me energy
?
If not, then politely decline.
If you can do something withthe person you like, the person
(38:07):
you want to do something atmaybe a better time, then you
know, do that, yeah, um, for isyou know, when we say boundaries
, it just maybe give it anotherword that feels better for you.
Oh, I like that idea yeah, youknow.
yeah, maybe me time, this is metime.
Right, schedule those things inyour calendar, yeah, um, or you
(38:30):
call it your sacred time.
Oh, I like that too, but wealso have to start filtering out
the people in our lives thatare not giving us that.
I had to do that, and I had todo that with family members too,
and that's not easy to do.
I can't even imagine having todo that with your immediate
family right.
(38:51):
But if you need to do that toprotect yourself, maybe even for
some time, some people can beout forever.
Some people can be out for afamily right.
But if you need to do that toprotect yourself, maybe even for
some time, some people can beout forever.
Some people can be out for aseason right.
Whatever you need Is to youknow this is really to honor
yourself, so is it.
Do you need five minutes tohave your coffee alone, right,
with your kids?
I used to tell my kids mommy'staking time out.
Speaker 1 (39:15):
Yeah, oh, I love it Because they're taking time out.
Right, because their mommy'staking time out.
It's like oh mom's in trouble.
Speaker 2 (39:20):
Even she's putting herself in time out.
Speaker 1 (39:23):
You know it's so funny.
That just took me back to amoment when I think it was my
daughter.
At one point she was like fouror five years old and she was
wanting something and we werebickering about it and I
couldn't negotiate out of it, Icouldn't distract her to
something else and finally she'slike, well, I'm going to do
this and then you're going to goto jail.
I was like, oh, please, send meto jail.
All I have to do is lay around,read books.
(39:44):
People will give me food.
I don't have to clean up afteranybody.
I was like, yes, please send me.
Might be a sign you need somerest if jail sounds good.
Yes, but yeah, I so agree.
I love your advice on the cycle.
We.
I don't think we have this as apodcast episode.
I think it was a webinarepisode during the pandemic
(40:04):
where we had a guest on who wasa specialist with women's cycles
and productivity and it waslike such a good unlock.
So those of you who arelistening, please take Seema's
advice Start doing some readingon your cycle and how productive
or unproductive you might be,you might be during those
moments of time in the month.
It is such a cool unlock, to beable to know your body and your
(40:28):
cycle and your system that well, to be able to leverage it in
your favor.
And I 100% agree with you.
Boundaries are really more thatchance of what is it that I need
to be able to leverage it inyour favor.
And I 100% agree with you.
Boundaries are really more thatchance of what is it that I
need to say no to so I can havemore of right.
So I always think about I'msaying no to this because I need
more of this right.
I get a request from the schoolto do some volunteer work.
I have volunteered for the lastseven, eight years.
(40:51):
Like it's like.
Sometimes you have to say nobecause I want more time,
quality time with my family,quality time with myself.
You know less sense ofresponsibility, accountability
on weeknights, because I'mrunning a business you know.
Think about what you want moreof, to help you validate the
reason why you're saying no andI think will give you a little
bit more courage when it comesto it.
(41:11):
And like, what are the otherdoors that you're opening by
saying no?
Yes isn't always theopportunity.
Sometimes no is the opportunity.
Speaker 2 (41:18):
Exactly.
And I say make a list of yournon-negotiables.
Sometimes we don't even knowthat.
And some of my clients havebeen really surprised when they
wrote down their non-negotiablesome of the things that was
actually there that they werenot honoring.
So saying no and settingboundaries is more like how are
you going to honor yourself?
So then you can be the bestversion of yourself, so you can
(41:42):
give to those people in yourcommunity that you want to give
to more of where they'llappreciate you.
That is a main key thing here.
Speaker 1 (41:52):
Yeah, and you're modeling such a great thing for
your family and for your kidsand for your partner and for
your coworkers.
I love that.
But there's one more thing thatI think a lot of women, once
they take action that kind offirst step into this is they
struggle with the idea of notgood enough or good enough.
How do you help those highachieving women who are trying
to embrace wellness practicesunderstand that they don't have
(42:14):
to be perfect in order to besustainable?
Speaker 2 (42:18):
Well, I show them.
I show them their own successthat they're forgotten.
So why?
Why do you feel you're not goodenough?
These are the things from yourlife that you're actually done
Right.
And if you were going to hiresomeone to do these kinds of
things, what kind of peoplewould you hire, right?
(42:39):
And then they started listing.
It's like honey, you alreadyhave all of this Right.
That's you, and and beyond that.
Speaker 1 (42:47):
Uh-huh, that reminder is so good.
I love that.
Speaker 2 (42:50):
It's okay.
So it's about taking a peekinto your own life and realizing
, because sometimes you don'tsee, because you're in the mode
of doing all the time, you don'tsee all the things you've done.
I did not realize that, healingmyself and going against the
doctors and listening to my owninner guidance was a huge thing.
(43:13):
Until I started sharing, peoplestarted saying that this is
extraordinary, yeah, right.
So just getting that validationthat it's extraordinary and
showing things from their ownlife reminds them that they are
good.
You're not good enough as towhose standards Right, right,
whose standards?
Your own own right.
So we're always setting uphigher standards for ourselves,
(43:36):
right?
So it's a reminder fromglimpses of their own life that
they are good enough, right?
Right and this was a surpriseto me perfection is actually a
low standard.
That is, you're trying to set abar of something that you're
never going to achieve, right,so it's really actually a lower
(44:00):
standard because you're justhiding and saying that I want to
be the best now, right?
It is in the action and in thedoing that you are the best if
you're getting certainrecognition.
I show them the recognition thatthey've received right.
The comments that they getright.
Sometimes, even the salary thatthey're getting.
(44:20):
If you were not good enough,you would not be having these
things.
Showing them where they aretoday is a great reminder that,
okay, I am good.
Who knows what good enough is?
On what metric are you lookingat, right?
Right yeah, what's thatmeasurement?
Exactly, exactly.
You are good.
That's why you have the thingsyou have now.
(44:42):
You are good if you're anentrepreneur.
Speaker 1 (44:47):
That's why you have the clients that you have, right
.
What you're speaking about, too, is just that practice of
gratitude, right, and stayingaware of what you have
accomplished.
It's celebrating having thosesmall wins and celebrating those
.
It's buying and giving yourselfflowers.
One other thing I think, too,that kind of does a lot of this
well outside of just socialconditioning, right.
Women are conditioned to,basically, we are the doers, we
(45:07):
take care of everyone, we takecare of everything we nurture,
we take care of everything wenurture.
And you know, and even in theworkplace you know, doing for
women is sort of how they thinkthat they have to climb right,
like they have to be seen asproductive and doing, and then
they get dinged for not leadingbecause they're so busy in the
(45:28):
weeds and doing and we never getout of the weeds.
So I would say that's onelittle trap that's easy to fall
into outside of theperfectionism trap, but then
also the comparison trap.
Do you come across a lot ofthat when you're dealing and
talking with their women thatyou mentor and coach.
Speaker 2 (45:42):
Yes, yes, they do like to compare.
But you know, when we'relooking at any statistics and
data, especially at work this isfrom my project management side
right we always say you can'tcompare apples and oranges.
Yes, you have to compare appleto apple right or orange to
(46:05):
orange.
So if you're comparing someone,you have to make sure that
they've come from the same exactbackground Right and the same
exact life.
But that's impossible.
Even siblings have the same setof parents, but they are so
different, yeah, like even twins, you know, identical twins that
(46:29):
can even look alike, soundalike.
Speaker 1 (46:31):
Yeah, totally different.
Speaker 2 (46:32):
But their whole life is different because of the kind
of perspective they've taken,right?
Yeah, so you can, um I, you canlook up to women your admirer,
strive to be similar to them,right, but you can't really
compare.
It has to be apples to apples,right?
So that's, that's another wayof hiding.
Speaker 1 (46:55):
Oh yeah, Way to call that out, Seema.
Speaker 2 (46:59):
Yeah, it's a perfectionism comparison.
It's another way of hiding.
Okay, what are you comparing to?
Why you're not like that?
Or she has this part.
That's really great.
I love to.
I strive for the to speak theway Michelle Obama speaks.
I like the way she speaks,right, she's to the point, she
(47:19):
comes across very elegant andpolished and she's speaking the
truth.
Yeah, okay, I'm never going tospeak just like her, right, but
that's healthy, right, if Istart comparing myself with
michelle obama right I'm gonnadrive myself crazy, absolutely
(47:39):
well, and I agree, I love thatit's such a good call.
Speaker 1 (47:42):
It's what you're hiding behind, um.
But I also tell myself oftenfollow your envy.
It's showing you what you want.
Oftentimes when we see thingsand others that we don't have,
the reason you're feelingjealous at all is not because
you just don't have it.
It's like, oh, I'm notacknowledging a want that I have
.
Okay, well, I want to speaklike Michelle Obama.
I want.
That means I want to be a moreeloquent speaker.
(48:03):
That means I need to do somereading and some research, maybe
start to find practices orplaces I can learn to be a
better speaker.
You know, and you're right,you're never going to be exactly
, because it's not apples toapples.
But you can at least then kindof separate yourself from the
comparison and the jealousy andsay, oh, there's just something
here that I'm wanting, that I'mnot acknowledging for myself,
(48:26):
that I.
Again, it comes back to you,right, you have to be the
accountable, responsible one tothen take action, because just
me sitting around being jealousof somebody is not going to move
the needle for me personally.
Speaker 2 (48:36):
Right and you make a good point, ask yourself why am
I comparing myself to thisperson?
What does she have that I don'tRight?
What is that trigger?
What is it triggering within me?
So maybe it is something thatyou have that you're not
acknowledging, that's dormantand that's ready to come out.
Yeah, there are differentaspects of us that are ready to
(48:59):
come out at different times whenwe are ready.
Speaker 1 (49:03):
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, I agree with thatwholeheartedly for sure.
So you know, we've talked alittle bit about perfectionism
and this idea of like being goodenough, or am I doing this all
right?
You know, ritual is kind of abig part of wellness, right,
it's a practice.
We say it's a practice becauseyou're not showing up to win the
game, you're just showing up to, you know, get a little bit
(49:23):
better each time.
How should our listenersapproach?
Or how has, uh, how should ourapproach to wellness evolve,
seeing as how you're just whatyou said just said evolve as our
careers and life circumstanceschange, because inevitably,
everything right, the one thingthat's inevitable is change.
So how do we work through thatand continue with our rituals?
Speaker 2 (49:43):
A ritual is it can be very simple, right, right, it
doesn't have to be verycomplicated.
Um, you know, like in themorning, what I do.
I wake up in the morning and,before I even get out of bed, I
think of three things that I amreally excited about, or the
three things I'm grateful for.
Grateful word doesn't reallywork for me, so I say appreciate
(50:06):
, okay, yeah, okay.
So what are the three things Iappreciate?
And then I, I make this tea, Ihave tea, and then I do some
kind of exercise.
I like variety, so I'll go fora walk or I'll do Tai Chi or I
(50:27):
will do yoga, whatever the moodI I asked my body okay, body,
what do you want to do today?
What do you need?
Right, yeah, A hundred percent.
So, um, as I'm doing thesethings, I meditate at the same
time in the floor.
I'm like very present, right.
Speaker 1 (50:41):
Very present in the moment.
Speaker 2 (50:43):
There are times that I will sit and do meditation
separately.
I meditate quite a bit too orsometimes I just turn on my
favorite song.
It could be a spiritual song,it could be something from my
faith, or it could be somethingthat I want to dance to my
favorite song.
Right, yeah, and I allow thattime, the first hour of the day,
(51:08):
just to be for myself, and thenI also have like a nighttime
routine.
The same way you know.
I'll turn off the tv, turn offeverything, get off social media
.
An hour or two hours before Imight have tea, if I feel like
it, I go in the bedroom, dim thelights and spend time there
(51:32):
before I actually go to bed.
Sometimes I do bedtime yoga andsometimes I meditate before I
go to bed.
Sometimes, if I need, sometimes, I do it.
Especially I have a podcast too.
So in between the meetings, inbetween, my clients and before a
(51:52):
podcast, I just center myself.
I'll do breathing two minutemeditation before my next thing
and I'm able to be a hundredpercent present.
So it doesn't have to be, itcan be just one thing.
Maybe you just have tea byyourself, maybe sit, have tea
out in the nature, out in nature, yeah.
(52:12):
So these are things that bringyou a peace, that bring you joy.
It can be.
I also like to have tea with myhusband every morning.
Mm-hmm, we have thatconversation.
Sometimes it's not tea,sometimes it's just a very long
hug, yeah Right, so think of thethings that you want to do that
(52:33):
brings you joy, that brings youpeace.
It gives you energy to you know, start, start your day or end
your day or anywhere in between,but it's something that you
would do on a regular basis.
Speaker 1 (52:46):
Yeah, I love that idea of the listening because as
you become more in tune, I'vedone this now even when I'm
working out, because I'm over 40now and you know I was last
weekend I was gardening and wehave like a dug in driveway
that's on the hillside and it'sgot walls on either side and I
thought I would be all stealthlike and just jump off the wall
(53:09):
onto the ground after likepulling a bunch of weeds, and
like my knee did not agree withthat move at all, and so it's
one of those things I'm likeokay, well, tomorrow I'm going
to ice it, I'm going to elevatethem and do the things I'm
supposed to do.
Take some time and I'll getsome rest, because clearly
jumping off of little three,four foot walls is not a thing
anymore after 40, right.
But listening to my body andthe rest of the week, I kind of
(53:31):
gradually moved into like Idon't even always stick with the
same workout.
I might wake up one morning andI'm like I need to go at it, I
need to go hard on a spin classand just get all this
frustration out.
And other times I'm like youknow what?
I just need to do some yoga,maybe some yin, where I'm going
to be in a pose for threeminutes.
That's also put ground support,because my body needs the extra
help and support right nowbecause I'm hurting and there's
(53:53):
just something to that.
So it's like there's so manylittle ways, even unplanned,
that you can kind of bring thatattention and awareness and
self-care.
And I think everything you'retalking about with the morning
and evening rituals are sohelpful for regulating your
nervous system and I think thething that's really helped me
(54:13):
being in a household with afamily is sharing those
expectations of like listen,this is mom's downtime.
Like you said, I'm puttingmyself on a timeout.
I love that Sharing thoseexpectations and upholding those
boundaries with your family isso important because it's so
easy to let the interruptionscome in.
But what you're talking about,too, really gives you that time
and ability to be present andgosh, what a gift to be like.
(54:34):
I've been sitting sometimes atmy kids' sports events and I
used to be on my phone checkingwork, stressing about work,
thinking about work, completelymissing the moment.
And because of some of thesepractices you're talking about
and because of wonderful coacheslike you, seema, I have been
able to just sit and enjoy andbe there for my kids and like be
present in the moment and watchall of these amazing little
(54:55):
things happen as their livesunfold, and that if you don't do
it for anything else, folks doit for that.
Being present is just the bestgift.
Speaker 2 (55:05):
We're always living in the future or in the past.
Right, you have to start livingin the present, because the
present is what creates yourfuture.
If you're happy right now, yournext minute and your future is
going to be just like that, andwhen things happen, life is
going to happen.
Right, people are going to comeback and say, Tima, I've been
(55:26):
happy every single day, but thisthing has happened.
Speaker 1 (55:28):
Life is going to life right.
So people are going to comeback and say I've been happy
every single day, but this thinghas happened life is going to
life, absolutely, life is goingto life, but then it's going to
help you.
Speaker 2 (55:34):
You won't read, you'll respond to it versus
react to it.
Yeah, and that's very different.
Those two things are verydifferent, right, you'll be able
to be more centered now myfamily's, like world is falling
apart around us and I'm stillvery calm and calm.
Yesterday I was on a phone callwith one of my team members and
(55:56):
my husband had already gone tobed, but it was something I had
said several times and explainedvery nicely.
But he could hear thedifference in my tone.
I wasn't upset, but I was firm,right, but because they're so
used to me being so level-headedand, you know, calm no matter
(56:17):
what happens, yeah, just thatfirmness in my voice.
He could tell and he asked meabout it this morning what
happened, right, so people start, you know, noticing all of
these things too yeah, so evenjournaling some people like
journaling, having a practice ofjournaling, yeah, at any time
of the day.
(56:37):
They sometimes even think it'sonly in the morning or it's
whatever works for you.
Yes, right, anything we'retalking about, I've said
something different.
Amy said something different toit.
It's all about experimenting.
Everyone experiments.
Your doctors are experimenting.
That's what I noticed andthat's why I started experiment.
It's like it's my life, right?
Why do they have the right toexperiment on me?
(56:57):
Absolutely, and so it's abouttrying different things,
exploring different things andseeing what it is that you like.
People think it's weird talkingto your body, but your body
knows best, right?
Yeah, your body knows best.
It knows what it wants.
So if you just startcommunicating and saying
sometimes I say, good morningSeema, good morning body, how,
(57:19):
how's today?
You know, what do you want todo?
What are we going to do today?
Right, even from people thinkthis is strange.
Even from the outfits I'm goingto wear, yeah, and you know, on
those days I always look andfeel the best I love it.
Speaker 1 (57:34):
I mean talk about decision fatigue there for
clothes.
Oh, that's really cool, I'mgonna play around with that too.
I think, yeah, just staycurious, get playful and know
that, like there's no one rightanswer, it's really about
exploring and finding the rightanswer for you.
I have loved, loved thisconversation so much.
Simo, we're coming close totime now, so I want to just give
our live listening audience alittle nudge.
Let them know that they aremore than welcome to drop
(57:55):
questions into the chat if theyhave any.
As we get ready to do that, Iam going to move us into our fun
little power round, which willbe kind of our fun quick
questions to get any more lastminute tips and advice to our
listeners.
All right, so what is yourgo-to five minute wellness
ritual when you're having achaotic day?
Speaker 2 (58:18):
I exercise on the when, when, especially when it's
chaotic day.
Yeah, because I know I'm goingto be a little extra stressed.
So I will exercise.
Either I'll do like a like ahit kind of exercise or I'll go
for a walk.
I have a beach near me.
I'll walk to the beach and I'llbreathe in that sea air and
(58:42):
then come back, so that is mybest thing to do.
We didn't talk about this asmuch, but what you eat is also
going to impact how you feelright.
So I am a hundred percent allabout healthy eating, whole food
eating and using supplements toreally help balance that.
Sometimes, depending on ifyou're traveling and you're
(59:05):
working, you're not always ableto feel your body with the best
options.
Yeah, out there.
So having the supplementsreally, really, and ahead and
supplements I agree you willnotice the kind of food that you
put in.
You will notice I can feel thatI'm feeling peace yeah, or that
I'm feeling uh stressed soespecially junk food.
You know that's going to addstress to it.
Speaker 1 (59:26):
Avoid junk food.
Speaker 2 (59:27):
Try to it's that's going to add stress to it.
Avoid junk food.
It's summer now.
Try to have more fruits andvegetables as much as possible.
Right, feel how caffeine isaffecting you.
Sometimes.
It's affecting you not in apositive way, right?
You know, look at all of thosethings.
That is going to be one of thehuge things of how you're going
(59:49):
to feel.
That's everything else wetalked about.
That's going to support you.
But if you're not eatinghealthy, that may not support
you as much, right, cause you'reit's you're it's coming from
within.
Yep.
So what you're putting in alsomakes a difference.
So I noticed when I eathealthier, especially on those
days like today, I made sure Ihad good protein breakfast
(01:00:11):
because I need to be able tosustain myself longer,
especially in the morning.
I'm doing interviews, so Iwanted to show up perfectly for
you guys.
So so, making sure that onthose days you're having those
kinds of meals.
So exercise meals, meditationfor those chaotic days is what I
(01:00:33):
do.
Speaker 1 (01:00:34):
I love it.
Thank you so much, seema.
This has been amazing.
This is such a great reminderfor all of us that success and
wellness aren't competingpriorities.
They really have to live inconjunction with one another and
you know they're reallypartners in creating a life
that's worth living.
(01:00:54):
So you know, helping others,the way that you're doing and
surviving and thriving withoutburnout, hopefully is going to
help.
You know a lot of people,including our listeners, write
their own success stories.
So you know again, folks thatare listening, please remember
that wellness isn't selfish.
It is a strategy, it is a wayto move forward.
It's not something that's goingto slow you down or hold you
back.
It's something that you have todo.
Please, please, especially inthe world we're living in right
(01:01:14):
now, make sure that you aretaking care of yourself, and
then that'll fuel you to helptake care of and show up for
others.
All of you can check out andconnect with Seema on LinkedIn,
and don't forget to check outher Uplift Media website, where
she continues to helppurpose-driven entrepreneurs
transform their stories intomovements that matter.
Seema, thank you so much forjoining us today in the Power
(01:01:37):
Lounge.
This has all been so fantastic.
We really appreciate you andall the work that you're doing
for women.
Speaker 2 (01:01:43):
Thank you, Amy.
Thank you for giving me thisopportunity to talk to your
community.
Thank you, Amy.
Thank you for giving me thisopportunity to talk to your
community, and I just want tosay you know, if there's one
selfless thing you want to dofor your community, that's to
take care of yourself.
You have an amazing story.
Create what you want, createthe life that you want and share
it.
Speaker 1 (01:02:04):
I love it.
All right, everyone.
Thank you so much for joiningus.
We appreciate you.
Speaking of self-care, you'regoing to have to go back and
listen to some of our classic,most amazing episodes.
We have close to 150 amazingstories from women who work in
digital marketing, advertisingand tech, as well as amazing
coaches and women who are justhelping us bring a more
well-rounded view to our worldand our personal and
(01:02:26):
professional growth with theTogether Digital Power Lounge.
I'm on vacation for the nexttwo Fridays, so I'll be spending
some time by the beach with myfamily.
Appreciate all of our amazingteam at Hercast Media for being
here for us and supporting usFor all of you.
Until then, we hope you keeplistening, Check out past
episodes, Check out Seema'swebsite.
(01:02:46):
Connect with her on LinkedIn.
Until next time, we're excitedto see you all with us here back
in the Power Lounge.
Until then, keep asking, keepgiving and keep growing.
We'll see you next time.
Bye, everybody.
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