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February 12, 2025 23 mins

"Encouraging disagreement strengthens decision-making, challenges blind spots, and creates an environment where people feel heard." - Winnie da Silva

What if avoiding disagreement is actually holding you back? Most of us instinctively avoid conflict. We’re taught that disagreeing can damage relationships, create tension, or make us look difficult. But what if I told you that the way we approach disagreement could be the key to making better decisions, building stronger teams, and gaining real influence? The truth is, the most successful people don’t run from disagreement—they master it. In this episode of Transformative Leadership Conversations, I explore how to turn conflict into a tool for growth rather than a source of frustration. I break down why disagreement is not the enemy, why avoiding it can be more damaging than facing it, and how the best leaders use it to their advantage.

You’ll hear me discuss:

  • Why avoiding disagreement is riskier than facing it – The hidden dangers of keeping quiet and why people often regret not speaking up more than they regret engaging in a debate.
  • How Abraham Lincoln turned political rivals into trusted allies – A look at his Team of Rivals approach and how bringing opposing voices together led to better decisions.
  • The difference between arguing to win vs. arguing to learn – Why treating disagreement as a battle is the fastest way to lose credibility, and what to do instead.
  • Why true influence isn’t about power—it’s about how you disagree – The people who hold the most influence aren’t necessarily the ones in charge, but the ones who challenge ideas the right way.
  • The 3 common ways people handle disagreement—and the one that actually works – Do you avoid, attack, or adapt? Understanding these patterns will help you shift toward more productive conversations.
  • How to make disagreements feel less personal and more productive – A simple mindset shift that reduces defensiveness and keeps the conversation focused on solutions.
  • Practical techniques for disagreeing without damaging relationships – Real strategies to express your point of view while still keeping mutual respect intact.
  • How to be persuasive without being confrontational – The key to making people listen to you without raising your voice or shutting them down.

Resources

Winnie da Silva on LinkedIn | On the Web | Substack I Email - winnie@winnifred.org

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