The Trauma Within Harnessing Positivity W/ Dasha

Do you have any questions, any comments about the episode? Jimanekia would love to hear from you!

Ever wondered how Dasha, the vivacious former WWE and AEW ring announcer, keeps her spirits high without a drop of coffee? Join us as we uncover her secret—harnessing the energy of the earth to fuel her infectious positivity and unwavering optimism. From our first meeting at AEW where her welcoming nature stood out, to her innovative "skip challenge" that brings joy and physical activity together, Dasha's unique approach to life is nothing short of inspiring. 

Dive into her early life, where resilience was born out of overcoming physical challenges like being born severely pigeon-toed and without tear ducts. Raised in a sheltered, religious household, Dasha’s mother’s integrity and dedication left a lasting mark, shaping an optimistic personality that flourished despite adversities. Her story reflects on the importance of family values, gratitude, and a relentless pursuit of a positive outlook amidst life's trials.

In our candid conversation, Dasha opens up about balancing her scientific pursuits with a degree in health sciences and a successful career in professional wrestling. We discuss effective communication, managing the pressures of maintaining a happy image, and the significance of authentic relationships. Touching on vulnerability, resilience, social media presence, and finding life’s purpose, this episode is a celebration of growth, curiosity, and the boundless energy Dasha brings to every room she enters. Prepare to be inspired by her journey of self-discovery and the joy she spreads.

Thank you all for listening. Set a boundary with yourself this week, set a boundary with someone else. If someone else does not respect that boundary. LET THEM LOOSE YOU! Stay hydrated internally and externally. We do not have an ashy family.


IG: @The_Trauma_Within
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@thetraumawithin
Jimanekia Ig: @Jimanekia

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:20):
Dasha has traveled the world and country as a
former WWE and AEW ringannouncer, host timekeeper,
wrestler, backstage interviewerand Spanish commentator.
She also competed in season twoof Dwayne Johnson's Titan Games
.
She is a science nerd whostudied molecular biology and

(00:41):
microbiology and earned abachelor's of science degree
from the University of CentralFlorida in health sciences.
Y'all, we got Dasha Lovelyfabulous.
So I am excited to really lety'all in on this conversation
that we're about to have withthis lovely human.
She is one of the nicest peopleI've ever met.

(01:03):
It's kind of gross and I needy'all to all know all the things
about her, and we're gonna betalking about resilience today,
which you know we're allstruggling, so let's, let's get
into it.
My first question for you we'rein it.
My first question for you.
I love this question.
I love the first question andthe last question.
So the first question is whoare you?

Speaker 2 (01:29):
Who am I?
Well, if somebody had to ask mewho I am, I would say I'm some
would say unfortunate.
I would say, fortunately, anoptimist.
An optimist, yes, I'm kind ofthe type of person that I've

(01:51):
been told.
When I walk in a room, theenergy changes and I think
that's kind of a testament towho I feel like I am on the
inside.
I try to always find the goodin people, not base my opinions
on what everyone else is talkingabout other people.
I always try to hold myself toa high level of integrity,
professionalism and I just liketo strive to be a light in any

(02:14):
room or any conversation Iintercept myself in.
So Dasha is, I would say, ahappy-go-lucky, fun, energetic,
intelligent human being.

Speaker 1 (02:28):
I will agree and support all of the above.
And you know some people can doit and they use like adult
candy as support or medication.
You just be out here raw dog inlife, that's wild.

Speaker 2 (02:42):
Yeah, everyone always asks me.
They're like what energy drinkare you on?
Nothing, how much coffee do youdrink?
I don't drink coffee.
I don't drink soda.
You can kind of see it in myteeth here.
Everyone's like do you likewhiting your teeth?
I'm like no, I don't whiten myteeth, I just don't drink soda
or coffee or anything like that.
You're so pure y'all.

Speaker 1 (03:06):
I anything like that.
I just strive to like feed offof the energy of the earth.
First lesson we all need to tapinto the energy of the earth
because we're all just making itMine's a little.

Speaker 2 (03:14):
Mine's a little off right now, but, um, the optimist
in me believes that this isonly temporary and you just have
to, like, hold your head up andwhen you wake up in the morning
it's like okay, well, I woke upon the right side of the dirt
today.
Uh, that means my purpose hereon earth has not been served.

(03:35):
So how and what will I do topositively influence the world
today?

Speaker 1 (03:42):
I feel like people are gonna listen to this and
like start floating.
They're going to be like youknow what?
I think I can skip.
Remember when we were doingthose videos, how to skip?
I think I can skip again.

Speaker 2 (03:52):
I haven't tried in a while.

Speaker 1 (03:55):
Oh it's crazy Because your legs.

Speaker 2 (03:56):
Don't do it, you just automatically stop.

Speaker 1 (03:59):
Yeah, Some people.
I need you later to go look onlike tiktok and like look at
skipping videos.
Adults don't know how to skipanymore well for me.

Speaker 2 (04:09):
I feel like I haven't tried since I ruptured my
achilles tendon, so it's beennot from skipping, it was from
gymnastics and flips and stuff.
But I mean, I haven't like, Ihaven't thought to skip.
Maybe we can make that ourthing.

Speaker 1 (04:24):
Start skipping.
Yeah, a thousand skips today.

Speaker 2 (04:28):
Let's do a skip challenge for the month of
whatever.
Let's just make it the skippingchallenge.
I don't hate it.
I think you're onto something.
I mean, if you see that on mysocial media, you better make it
happen and tag me when youstart the skip challenge.

Speaker 1 (04:43):
I'm in, okay, I'm going to.
Okay, I'm going to skip, I'mgoing to skip.
How did we meet we?

Speaker 2 (04:49):
met at AEW, so we were sitting and catering, if I
can remember correctly.
Oh, okay, I love it you hadreally awesome blue hair and I,
being the person that I am, waslike hi, I haven't met you
before, what's your name?
And you're like.
My name's Jim and Nika, but youcan call me Jim, because most

(05:10):
people can't say that and I waslike well, my name's Dasha, like
Sasha with a D, and I'm prettysure, if I can recall correctly,
you were like a lot of peoplethink that I'm a makeup artist,
but I'm not.

Speaker 1 (05:31):
Yeah, that's crazy.
They still think.
Some people still think that myname is Miranda.
It's not.

Speaker 2 (05:38):
They think you're Miranda and you're like, listen
here, all black people are notthe same, like hello.
We are both very lovely,incredible, amazing, different
human beings.
I love you both dearly.

Speaker 1 (05:51):
So different.

Speaker 2 (05:52):
But yeah, I'm pretty sure that's how we met.
It was in catering, possibly ata pay-per-view, because that's
usually when they bring you in.
And then I attached to you andI think I pretty much told you I
was going to be your assistantand I was going to introduce you
to everyone that I knew becausenobody.
it's one of those things that Idon't like.

(06:13):
When you're like oh, hey, andyou're like hey, and then it's
like that awkward, should I knowthis person?
Do I not know this person?
I'm like hey, I don't know ifyou've met her before, but this
is Jumanica.
She is our trauma specialistand she helps our brains get
right at work, and that's I'mpretty sure that's how we met,
you know what.

Speaker 1 (06:32):
And we were in San Francisco.
It was the first time I was onsite.
I didn't even actually work atthe company then.
Oh really, I didn't.
No, I was like feeling it out,I didn't.
That was in March, it was inMarch, and then I didn't
actually start working for AEWofficially until like April or
May.

Speaker 2 (06:52):
Oh, okay, yeah, I thought you were already in.
You were in my book.

Speaker 1 (06:57):
Now, what does trauma mean to you?

Speaker 2 (07:02):
Trauma, trauma, trauma, trauma is something that
kind of like impacts you for, Iwould say, the rest of your
life, whether it's positive ornegative.
But I feel like most of thetime trauma is associated with
negative things and events thatoccur in your life that are
negative, that kind of alter andchange a little bit as to who

(07:28):
you are.
But I wouldn't say necessarilyit's permanent.
It could be temporary but,depending on the type of trauma
and the level of trauma coulddepend on how long it impacts
you and the type of person thatyou are.
I feel like for me, dependinglike if it's personal and it

(07:49):
depends who it's from.
If it's somebody whom I'm veryclose to or somebody who I care
dearly about, if they dosomething to me, then that
affects me far more thansomebody who I'm not close to or
don't really know very well.
Or if it's something that youhave absolutely no control over,

(08:11):
just depending what thesituation is, it impacts me a
little bit differently.

Speaker 1 (08:17):
Yeah, I think a lot of people know the things you've
done as an adult, but I thinkthat we, especially being women
of color, we are roots peopleand I think it's important to
know people's origin stories, toknow why you're so goddamn
resilient and why you see thelight and all the things.

(08:39):
So who was baby Dasha?

Speaker 2 (08:41):
baby Dasha.
Baby Dasha was stubborn frombirth.
I, you, you literally could askmy mom like I was born like
severely pigeon-toed, like a lotof people don't know, because
they just they see like me, likein heels, and I can walk, you
know, effortlessly, or whateverthe case may be Float honey

(09:02):
Float.
Floating yeah, because we'refloating.
Today they see me floating andI actually was born severely
pigeon-toed.
It was literally like frombirth.
I was born messed up.
My feet were turned in, my tearducts were blocked.
I literally couldn't evenphysically cry.

(09:23):
I I could make the noise, butlike tears couldn't stream down
my face.
Yeah, so like at 18 months, Ihad my first surgery and that
was to actually like constructtear ducts, so then I could cry,
because people be like man,that'd be so great not to cry.
Well, what it actually does isit creates a lot of pressure in

(09:45):
your face.
You get like crazy puffy eyes,like you have to release it,
like I am the happiest person,but I also cry a lot too.
I cry a lot as well because yourbody physiologically can only
like, hold and withstand so much.
You gotta release it um a lotof times.
And I I even cry while I'mlaughing and smiling, sometimes

(10:06):
when I'm sad.
But yeah, I was born severelypigeon-toed.
I was born without tear ducts.
I cost my parents a lot ofmoney.

Speaker 1 (10:16):
They're like look at this expensive little person.
I was very expensive.

Speaker 2 (10:21):
And I had to sleep with these braces on my feet,
that kind of turned them out,and my I had to sleep with these
like braces on my feet, thatkind of like turned them out,
and my dad had to likemanipulate my legs and
strengthen my legs.
But, as weird as that mightsound, I actually started
walking at six months and likerunning by eight months and I
developed like crazy upper bodystrength.
So when I tell you, resilienceis something that I think I was

(10:45):
kind of born with, I feel like Iwas, because I literally have
been fighting so many differentkinds of physical, mental,
emotional battles ever since Iwas little that most people just
see me as like happy-go-luckyperson.
They're like, oh, she's got noproblems, no cares, no, this, no
, that.
It's like.
Oh wait, take a second, youcould talk to me.

(11:08):
I'm an open book.
I would love to share my storywith you, but it's been far from
easy.

Speaker 1 (11:14):
Yeah.
So then, what was like middleschool, high school?

Speaker 2 (11:20):
as a Floridian, Middle school and high school as
a Floridian Middle school andhigh school as a Floridian.
Well, for me, I was born in avery sheltered household, so I
would say I didn't really seeany problems going on because my

(11:41):
mom shielded us from so much.
Like I feel like now as anadult it was a blessing and a
curse because I didn't see a lotof the malice that there was in
the world and I always thoughteveryone was just so nice and so
perfect and everything wasgreat and it kind of allowed me

(12:02):
to continue to develop thathappy-go-lucky personality
within me.
I'm very lighthearted when itcomes to a lot of stuff and
people know if they're having abad day they can count on me to
crack a joke or ease the tension.
But it was so sheltered thateven as a as a kid, like we

(12:26):
weren't allowed to like spendthe night at anyone's house.
Like I didn't get to celebrateHalloween because we spent every
Halloween in church and itwasn't even allowed to like
dress up or anything like that.
We didn't listen to a lot ofsecular music.
Every Sunday was go to church.
My mom was a Sunday schoolteacher.
Every Sunday was go to church.

(12:48):
My mom was a Sunday schoolteacher.
But at the same time my momlived what she preached as weird
as that may sound, you knowlike she was one of those people
that, like when my parents gotdivorced, she was like I made a
vow to God and you know I'm onlygoing to be with him and even
still to this day she's neverdated anyone.
She dedicated her life, youknow, to us and to church and I

(13:13):
see that integrity in her and Ikind of mirror that a little bit
in my life.
But at the same time I was veryshocked, growing up like as an
adult, to see like oh wow,people really aren't as nice as
they seem.
And some people have hiddenagendas and some people are not
kind hearted like you thinkeveryone's kind at heart.

(13:39):
Feel like now, at my age, I'mstill growing up because of some
of the things or experiencesthat I didn't get to experience,
that other people did.

Speaker 1 (13:51):
Do you think it made it harder or do you just feel
like you're like constantly,like in motion?

Speaker 2 (13:58):
It's hard and I stop and I think about it sometimes
because I'm like, would I havewanted another life?
Like, yes, we had struggles,you know, financial struggles
and things like that.
You know, I had somebody almosttry to kill my dad when I was
like eight years old, you know.
So I saw minor little glimpses.
But like, when it comes to likenowadays kids are raised on TV

(14:20):
and the internet and stuffTikTok, I didn't and TikTok yeah
, I didn't have access to thatkind of stuff because I am a
millennial.
So I went to the library andthat was the only time I had a
computer, you know.
But I stopped and think and Iactually asked myself this
question the other day and I waslike, if I could change
anything, would I?
And honestly I wouldn't.
Because I feel like, because Iwas raised and brought up that

(14:44):
way and because my mom never mymom or dad never really pushed
me to believe a certain way orbelieve their way, because it
was the only way my mom alwayssaid listen, life is about
choices and you can make yourchoice.
This is what I believe in andyou can choose to believe in it,

(15:06):
but at the same time I'm notgoing to get in the way of you
experiencing other things ortrying other things.
I'm always going to give you myfeedback and an opinion if it's
warranted and you want it.
And I also grew up with a momtoo.
That was like hey, you know howmost of your friends' moms say
that they're their best friends.

(15:26):
Well, I'm not your friend, I amyour mom.
I have to raise you so you cangrow up to be a good adult, a
positive member to society.
Now, once you become an adultand you're self-sufficient and
you don't rely on me and you'renot under my home, then maybe we
can be friends.

(15:46):
And I'm very grateful for that,because she wasn't my friend
growing up.
I was terrified of her and evento this day I'm like, if mom
sees this, what is she going tothink?
She instilled that fear.
But I don't think it's aproblem and I don't like have

(16:07):
any anger or anything like thattowards her, because I'm
grateful that she was able tostand true to her word, you know
, be have conviction in, in whatshe believes in and stand firm,
because I'm kind of this alittle bit the same way now
myself because of that, what didyou want to be when you grew up
?
Like that's, you know that's ofthat.

Speaker 1 (16:24):
What did you want to be when you grew up?
You know that's always aquestion what do you want to do
when you grow up?
You're like I don't know.

Speaker 2 (16:30):
Well, I always wanted to work in entertainment.
I always knew that I lovescience and I love mathematics.

Speaker 1 (16:37):
Let's talk about the science aspect.
Does everyone know what kind ofnerd you are?
Is that like a special thing?

Speaker 2 (16:46):
I don't know if a lot of people know.
I don't know if a lot of peopleknow, but yeah, I studied
molecular biology andmicrobiology.
I have a degree in healthsciences and I truly love
science.

Speaker 1 (16:58):
I love human anatomy.

Speaker 2 (17:01):
I don't get grossed out by anything.
Sometimes people are like Dasha, dasha, tmi.
I'm like what was I notanatomically correct?
Was I speaking out of, out ofthe scientific realm?
Well, no, well then, okay, whyare you getting offended over
here, especially like at work?
And sometimes people be likewell, why, why, why are you

(17:23):
emotional?
Or or why is this, or like, notemotional.
I'm just always happy, I guessI work.
But why is this?
And I'm like well, maybe youmay think it's TMI, but I'm
shedding my uterine lining.
And they're like oh, why?
I'm like did I speak out ofturn?
No, that is what it is called.
And they're like oh, that's sogross, it's true.

Speaker 1 (17:46):
Okay, I didn't mean to throw you off.
I just feel like people shouldknow all these aspects that make
you this person.
Okay, so you wanted to be anentertainment back.

Speaker 2 (17:56):
I always wanted to be an entertainment, but I always
knew I needed to have a plan B,something to fall back on just
in case it didn't happen, youknow.
So I went to college, I studiedscience, got my degree in it,
had a love and passion forhealth and fitness.

(18:17):
But like I still had thatyearning to like work in
entertainment and to fund myundergraduate education, I
competed in pageants, which Iwas the biggest tomboy growing
up.
Biggest tomboy growing up Wereyou, oh yeah, like literally all
my friends would be like.
You are a tomboy with girlishtendencies.

(18:37):
Huh, okay, didn't see thatcoming.
I never was into makeup.
I never was into like fashionor anything like that.
It was always like hitting thegym, being sweaty cars, like all
that kind of stuff.
I like outdoor adventures,climbing trees, catching things
like that was my childhood.

(18:59):
But we were only allowed to gofrom one neighbor to the other
neighbor because El Viejo Lcowould take us well, I mean,
probably saved you.

Speaker 1 (19:08):
Honestly, outside is wild, outside is fucking wild it
is very wild wow, okay, soentertainment.
Did you have like a thing youwanted to do?
I know some people like I wantto do this, or you're just like
no, I'm just in it, like I justwant to do this.
Or you're just like no, I'mjust in it, like I just want to
be touching everything.

Speaker 2 (19:25):
Well, I wanted to.
As crazy as this sounds, Iwanted to be a role model.
I wanted to be somethingdifferent because I mean our
generation raised by TVs, youknow, generation after us raised
by TVs.
Essentially, you know, I wasn'traised by a TV.
I was raised by, you know, amother that took us out to
community events and wevolunteered a lot and we were

(19:48):
very active in our community andI wanted to kind of try to be
something different.
A lot of people would alwaystell me well, your personality
isn't going to last here andwrestling and I actually was
watching Total Divas, as crazyas it may sound, I grew up a
casual fan of wrestling.
If we ever played hooky fromchurch and stayed home with my

(20:08):
dad, we would always wrestleeach other on the bed or the
couch with my brother and mysister and I was like, hmm, this
is pretty cool.
These people are physically fitand active, they're models,
they're on television.
Yeah, this checks all the boxes.

(20:28):
Essentially, I would love to dothis and I applied online and
it was.
It's wild and crazy to thinkthat I actually got my foot in
the door in entertainment, inthe pretty much the pinnacle,
like the top wrestling promotionat the time it was before AEW
even existed.
I know there was people thatyou know wrestled in the indies

(20:51):
for decades and all these yearsworking their way up to it.
And I went to college, Ivolunteered, I had my own
personal training company, I didpageants.
So with my resume they took achance with me and got in as a
wrestler with WWE and started inNXT and then transitioned to

(21:11):
hosting and announcing andbackstage interviewing and I
survived there for five yearswhen everyone would tell me
you're too nice to be here, wedon't understand it and people
thought I had like a hiddenagenda and like they thought you
were the ops, didn't they?
they were like, they thought Ihad a hidden agenda, like I was
gonna backstab somebody, I waslike nah, I'm the one that gets

(21:31):
backstabbed all the time becauseI believe everyone's kinder
than they actually are.

Speaker 1 (21:36):
That is wild.
We're working on that.
We got to release that.

Speaker 2 (21:40):
Yeah, but I refuse to change who I am in the industry
.
And hey, look at me now, I'munemployed.

Speaker 1 (21:47):
They don't want me.
Yes, no.

Speaker 2 (21:53):
They unemployed, they don't want me, yes, no, they
don't want me in the industryanymore.

Speaker 1 (21:55):
Back to school.
Oh, what, if?
What if you were like the hotprofessor?

Speaker 2 (22:01):
I I also have this weird thing.
People tell me that I'm like,I'm beautiful or I'm hot or
whatever, and I was the uglyduckling growing up, so it still
feels kind of she was fallingout of trees and shit and
chasing bugs.

Speaker 1 (22:14):
They were confused, they were confused, they were
confused.
What does resilience mean toyou?

Speaker 2 (22:22):
resilience to me is when bad things happen to you
and you feel like you're down,no what, you pick yourself up
and you keep on going.
You keep on going because youhave to be resilient.
Now, as an adult, obviously, myperception of the world has
changed a little bit.

(22:43):
I've grown, I've evolved, andthe one thing that you do need
in this world is to haveresiliency, because there's
always going to be someone orsomething that's trying to knock
you down, and you have to beable to find the strength within
you and the courage within you,the resilience within you, to

(23:06):
be able to stand up and be likehey, guess what?
This isn't going to knock medown, it's got me knocked down
temporarily right now, but it'snot going to be able to stand up
and be like hey, guess what?
This isn't going to knock medown.
It's got me knocked downtemporarily for right now, but
it's not going to be forever.
And I feel like having been bornwith resiliency.
Any other kid growing up wouldhave just given up hey, this is

(23:26):
too hard, it's not going tohappen.
It's like with school.
People see me and they're likewell, you had such good grades
from kindergarten through highschool, you graduated top of
your class.
I'm like, yeah, but a lot ofpeople didn't know that I have
an undiagnosed learningdisability because we couldn't
afford to get it tested.
So I have a reading disabilitythat it takes me reading things

(23:50):
10 times more than the averageperson just to be able to read
it and comprehend it.
Yet I can still study sciencebecause it's something that I
love, you know, and it's one ofthose things that, like things
don't naturally come easy to me.
I just practice a lot and try alot and try to figure out, and
when one thing doesn't work I'lltry a different route or I'll

(24:14):
try to make this connection hereor talk to this other person
over here, and that resiliencyis kind of what helps motivate
me and keep me on track and keepJust quitting.
I was like somebody raise noquitter.

Speaker 1 (24:30):
No, no, for me I have come to a bit of a battle with
that word.
I think there's this idea whenpeople put the label on us that
we're resilient, that it kind offor some people they see us as
like pushovers.
Or like or like.
Well, you can get through thething, you're fine.

(24:52):
I'm tired of being resilient.
I'm a tired bitch and I, as asyou, have navigated many things
murder, um, assault, trauma, allthe fun things and you know,
sometimes I get tired of beingresilient.
Do you ever find yourself tiredof having to be so goddamn

(25:15):
resilient?
Oh the eyes.

Speaker 2 (25:17):
For those that can't see, the eyes are flat.
Oh, I'm exhausted.
I have gotten to the point now,kind of in my life where I do
feel a little bit exhausted, andit is exhausting and I have
this, this battle and I don'tknow if you do too sometimes
where it's like, whereeveryone's like, well, you're
just so kind and you're so nice,you're gonna bounce back I

(25:38):
don't have that battle.

Speaker 1 (25:39):
People don't think I'm that nice and you're gonna
be fine.

Speaker 2 (25:41):
You're gonna be fine and you're like but I don't feel
fine and like I'm currently inthat, right now, you know
wherever everyone's like, well,you're just, you're just, your
thing is coming, your thing isgoing to come.
And I'm like, I'm stuck in thewhy do I have to be so resilient
stage.
Because it's like I just feellike sometimes things get taken

(26:03):
away from you that are out ofyour control and you're like I
understand we're dealt thesehardships and we're dealt.
You're like I understand we'redealt these hardships and we're
dealt these differentexperiences.
But it's like man, I'm tired ofalways having to prove myself.
I'm tired of always having tofind the courage, the strength.
I'm just tired.

(26:24):
But it's like when you do sayyou're so tired, then you get a
little kick, a little glimmer ofsomething good's to come.
And with resiliency it's likewith life Life has ups and downs
and if you don't have ups anddowns in life, you're flatlined,
You're dead.

(26:44):
So it's one of those like.
I feel like, temporarily, I'min a low right now, but I know
myself and I know I'll be ableto pick myself up and I know I
will surround myself with peopleI love and people that truly
care for me and I try not torely on social media to get

(27:09):
self-worth.

Speaker 1 (27:11):
No one do that.

Speaker 2 (27:13):
No, no, it's all a lie, especially X.

Speaker 1 (27:17):
Oh, look, such a person.
I actually called it that.
Especially Twitter, I refuse.
I know it hurt.
I actually didn't like it.
You see how quickly I was likeew, especially on Twitter, um,
especially on twitter.
Twitter is like a playground ofmiserable people that I feel
like.
They see happiness, they seeresilience and they're like must

(27:39):
ruin it must destroy, willwrite negative and re.

Speaker 2 (27:47):
Do you still retweet on?

Speaker 1 (27:49):
X.
Yes Well maybe it's a share.
I don't know what they call it,but you can.
I don't know what they call itthough.

Speaker 2 (27:56):
No, no, I know, you can physically do the thing I
know, but I don't know what youcall it, but I don't know what
it's called.

Speaker 1 (28:01):
Is it a share?
Let me see, I'm going to look.
Hold on.

Speaker 2 (28:11):
Maybe I don't know, let's see if it even says
anything.
I mean, everyone retweet sounds, so oh, it's a repost oh,
repost okay post, so I know youcan quote stuff.
But yeah, it's a lot easier forpeople just to express their
thoughts.
But it's a good thing that Itry to stay away from it,
because I like pictures andhappy things and reading, like I

(28:32):
said, is not my strong point.

Speaker 1 (28:34):
Yeah, we're like fuck your words.
Anyway, show me a photo.

Speaker 2 (28:38):
Forget you.
Sorry, didn't read it, didn'tsee it.

Speaker 1 (28:43):
Doesn't exist.
That's so interesting In thework that you have done and
growing up a millennial, youknow we didn't have all the
things, and so how do younavigate social media as someone
that is such a positive person?
Because, like we just said, theinternet isn't, but also it is

(29:03):
a part of your work.

Speaker 2 (29:05):
It is.
It's a part of my work, butthis is the way that I handle it
.
I can choose what kind ofplatform I would like.
I would like to have a pagethat exudes confidence,
happiness, joy, a distractionfrom people's reality.

(29:26):
I would like it to motivatepeople.
I like funny, you know PG jokes, and that's the kind of stuff
that I choose to have on my page.
Yes, I do get negative stuff allthe time and guess what I do?
I don't block you, I don'tengage in that aspect, I just
delete it.
And some people will be like Isaw you deleted my post and

(29:49):
they'll like rewrite it.
And I'm like and delete, youknow there's no more, Did it
again, and then they write itagain.
They're like I saw you did itand it's like and you are
non-existent, and that's it.
Like for me.
It's just that I don't want tobe around that negativity and I

(30:09):
don't want to be around thatnegativity and I don't want to
to see and yes, constructivecriticism is a thing you know
like, I get it.
I mess up sometimes too, butI'm also human, you know, as, as
we all are, and we have proventhat by selecting the stairs,
proving we're not robots onsocial media but um?

(30:32):
Or the bicycles, what are they,bicycles?

Speaker 1 (30:37):
you hate unsolicited advice?
Oh my gosh, I'll be like I'mgonna stop you right there.
See this one.
This is why I'm not the niceone like I'm gonna stop you
right there.
I didn't ask for this, but I Ihold it, I don't care, swallow
it.

Speaker 2 (30:53):
I wish I could, but I guess that's why we're all
different, right, we do need abalance of all these differences
.

Speaker 1 (31:03):
Yeah, I think I'm too nice sometimes.

Speaker 2 (31:06):
So people yeah, what is your balance?

Speaker 1 (31:06):
That's what I'm like.
How do you balance havingno-transcript?

Speaker 2 (31:35):
Well, I primarily choose not to engage, but if it
does get out of control, I amnot afraid to put you in your
place either.
And that is in me.
And she is fiery and she isstill professional and she
doesn't scream and she doesn'traise her voice, she just speaks

(31:57):
from person to person, allowsyou to possibly correct yourself
if you have misspoken, becauseit's happened before.
Sometimes you'll be like oh mygosh, I'm so sorry, I didn't
mean it that way.
I'm like perfect.
Well, it didn't come off verynice, so we may want to reword
these words.

Speaker 1 (32:11):
I think that's actually better.
I think when you are calm andslow down and actually address
the thing, it is creepierbecause people don't expect that
right, like we are in a societywhere people get loud and
people get violent and don'tactually take the time.
And sometimes it's like I'mslowing this down because I also

(32:35):
don't want to repeat myself andI wanted to be very clear on
what I'm saying, versus like noone hears that I don't like
cursing, so that's usually notmy go-to.

Speaker 2 (32:48):
But also I feel like the art of communication, like
actual communication, issomething that is lost and I
like to give people the space tocommunicate.
But a lot of people just preferto just throw it all at you and
then run away and not actuallyconfront.

(33:08):
And I'm also one of thosepeople that, even if I don't
agree with you, I strive to giveyou the space to communicate
how you're feeling and then makemy choice and set my boundary
as to what works and whatdoesn't work.
You know, I just I would ratheryou hear something from me than

(33:28):
hear it from somebody else.
And if I were to mention it tosomebody else before a telephone
goes into play, just take asecond.
Just, hey, pull me over to theside.
Hey, I heard this.
You don't have to disclose yoursource, but I heard this.
Is it what you meant?
Oh, my gosh, I'm so sorry.
No, that wasn't, but I couldsee how it was misconstrued this
way.
And it's just a simpleconversation that you could have

(33:51):
with somebody.
And I'm also that type of personthat, once we've had that
conversation and we've addressedit, if there has been changed,
action then dropped, it's done,we've moved on.
I'm not storing in my Rolodexof bringing it if we ever have a
fight or an altercation oranything like that, but if it's

(34:11):
been resolved, then we moveforward.
That's the only way like peoplearen't going to hold anger and
resentment towards each other.
You know if you messed up, it'sreal simple.
I'm really sorry, I messed up,but this is what I'm going to do
to move forward.
You can't just say I'm sorry,I'm sorry, I'm sorry, but not
have any change to action.

(34:31):
If not, it's just an emptyapology.

Speaker 1 (34:36):
Isn't that also somewhat insanity, the constant
staying in the same thing andnot actually evolving?

Speaker 2 (34:45):
It's hard, easier said than done.
Don't get me wrong, because forme, you know personally,
dealing with some stuff justdepending if it's somebody super
close to you that's hurt you.
It like messes with your head.
It messes with you so much.
But we all have things thatwe're going through, and I'm I.

(35:06):
Now, as an adult, I'm learningabout different types of
communication.
I'm one of those people that'saggressive in my communication,
and I don't mean aggressive withlike language or whatever, it's
just like okay, hey, this iswhat happened, let's talk about
it.
You know, can we talk about itnow?
Are we too angry?
Are we not Like I don't mindtalking about stuff?

(35:27):
Some people just think what'sthe point?
Why am I even going to mentionit?
Like, does it matter?
My opinion doesn't matter orwhatever.
So I myself am learningdifferent types of personalities
and how people communicate so Ican become a better
communicator, because noteveryone's like me.
I will just tell you how it isblack and white and that's how

(35:49):
it is in my brain.

Speaker 1 (35:51):
Do you think that there comes a point when
resilience is no longer a thing,when you want to stop fighting?

Speaker 2 (36:06):
For some people yes, for me.
I just feel like it's likeingrained in my DNA.
For some people yes, for me.
I just feel like it's likeingrained in my DNA.
I've tried, I've tried beinglike, oh surrender, I don't want
to do this anymore.
And then I catch myself wakingup again figuring out, okay,
well, girl, you got it.
I catch myself like hypingmyself up, trying to like get
back on track.

(36:27):
I mean, I'm kind of goingthrough that right now because,
trust me, there's some days thatI'm like I don't want to do
anything, everything is terrible.
I even called you, you know, asa friend of like I'm done, I'm
this, I'm that, and then I'mlike dang it.
I don't want to break thishabit of resiliency.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (36:47):
I think there's like because it's so ingrained in you
, it's like you don't know otherthings and that's why I'm like
is it helpful or is it harmful?
Do you think there's theresilience that we push
ourselves too far trying tounderstand other people?
Sometimes I'm like I actuallydon't, I don't understand this
and I don't actually feel like Ineed to Like it's not for me.

(37:09):
Like you said, it's just Idon't need to push through to
always communicate with everyoneelse, because I think you know,
in communication, as we know,there's two sides of it the
sender of information, thereceiver.
And if you're sending meinformation but don't give a
fuck about the way that Ireceive it, then we're not
communicating.
You're talking at me versustalking to me.

Speaker 2 (37:31):
Yeah, and I definitely do see that a lot.
But I feel like the scientistin me is somebody who likes to
resolve things, who likes toresolve things.
So for me I don't feel at easeunless I, in my brain, come up

(37:53):
with a conclusion as to why.
But I feel like once my brainis okay with the conclusion,
then I can let it go.
What if you never find it?
Then I'm dead, oh, deceased.
We'll miss you, deceased.
No, I don't know.

(38:14):
Honestly, there are a lot ofthings that perplex me in that.
But it's kind of like in mybrain it's not that I failed or
I never figured it out.
It's kind of like this isn'tthe time for me to conclude it.
It's all like an openexperiment, I guess.

Speaker 1 (38:39):
I had a conversation with someone we know, the lovely
RJ, and RJ was like I don'tbelieve in happiness, I don't
believe that people can just behappy all the time, like it's
not a real thing.
As someone that presents as avery happy person, in reality,
no one is happy all the fuckingtime.
And so how do you navigatepresentation versus reality when

(39:05):
, again, this is how people seeyou and they're like what you're
, sad, what you have feelingsLike there's other emotions that
you have.
Do people get thrown off?

Speaker 2 (39:18):
I feel like, because everyone sees me so happy all
the time and because I strive tobe such a kind person, that if
you truly care about me, ithurts them when I'm sad, which
in turn makes me feel bad.
So then my cycle is all right.

(39:38):
We'll get happy again, girl, soyou don't have to be causing
pain to other people.
Interesting people Interesting.
So I feel like a lot of it is.
You know, like some people goon social media and they just
like tap to like fake likesomebody's happiness.
You know, for me, like honestly, like because sometimes so many

(40:01):
things are out of your controlor your life may be flipped
upside down or whatever Like itbrings me joy, so much joy when
good things happen to people.
Because this world is so hardand life is so hard, it honestly
like in my very core, like itdoesn't matter what's going on

(40:24):
in my life.
Seeing somebody who's beentrying to have a baby for such a
long time, who's such a goodperson you know, finally get
pregnant or adopt a child or goon the journey by themselves
like that brings me joy.
You know, somebody who'sstruggled with love finally find
somebody that's their matchlike that brings me so much joy.

(40:44):
Somebody that I know hasstruggled and woken up every
single morning and put in allthis hard work and effort just
to make their dreams come true,that brings me so much joy.
You know, it's like evensomething I was like what
brought me a level of calmnesswhen I lost my job.

(41:05):
It literally was ripped from me, you know, gut punched.
But knowing that the personthat you know is announcing, you
know, now in my position, likeBobby, is somebody who I've
known, like it brings me joybecause, like this has been his
dream for 20 something years andhe's a good human being, you

(41:27):
know.
And when he was told, you knowyou don't have the look or you
don't have this or you don'thave that Like here, even though
it may feel like it was takenaway from me, it brings me joy
knowing that he's finallyaccomplishing his dream.
So that brings me comfort.

(41:48):
It makes me happy yeah, it makesme emotional because I don't
got a job, but at the same time,I know how much it means for
him and he's not the type ofperson that would squander an
opportunity like that.
You know, like I like seeingthat a lot.
I like seeing people that, nomatter what happens to them,

(42:09):
they just push forward and theyinspire other people, because
even me that, you know, feelsvery sad, you know, and, and I
don't know, in a certain way,you know it brings it that
brings me joy.
So it's like I think my defaultis happy.
You know it brings it thatbrings me joy.
So it's like I think my defaultis happy.
You know it is happy becausethat's what keeps me alive and

(42:33):
that's what keeps me going.

Speaker 1 (42:35):
You know, sadness, that darkness and sadness, I
like light, I like bright thingsyeah, but I think you also have
to understand darkness to be inthe light.
I was having this conversationlast night.
It's like you have to know allthe parts and like exist in all
the parts.

(42:56):
And she was like becausethey're all within us.
And I'm like, yeah, Like somepeople are, like I can never be
mean or do a bad thing and I'mlike, yes, you can when push
comes to shove.
It's like the ways that we showup and the things that we need.
Do you find that yourresiliency is more for yourself
or for other people?

Speaker 2 (43:15):
I think it's for me, it's to keep me from
self-sabotaging or, you know,going into a dark place, you
know, because that I don't like,that.
I don't like being in thatplace, you know.
But it's in my life personally,when I do get into like that,

(43:35):
spiraling down into that darkplace, it's kind of crazy how
the universe sends you somebodythat kind of helps, you know,
shine just a little bit of alight and you're like, okay, all
right, that was a close onekind of a thing.
You know, and I've always triedto build authentic
relationships with people,Nothing superficial, like if I

(43:59):
call you my friend, like youlegitimately are my friend, like
I will stop what I'm doing togo help you if you need help,
you know, kind of a thing.
Now, if you're doing somethingwrong that you shouldn't be
doing and it's harming otherpeople, I'm going to call you
out on it.

Speaker 1 (44:15):
But I think that's friendship too.
You got to hold peopleaccountable.

Speaker 2 (44:18):
Yeah, hold people accountable.
And I don't know, I reallydon't know.
I'm still trying to figure itout.

Speaker 1 (44:27):
But I think that's also the thing in like giving
yourself permission of no, thatit's not perfect, and that we're
all still trying to figure itout.
Like none of us were given ablueprint.
Sure, we were started out.
I always say that our teachersare our parents.
Our first teachers are ourparents and our families, and
then we learn the things.

(44:47):
And then we get older and it'slike they taught me these things
, but do they fit the personthat I am today?
And then we throw some shit out, we get some new things and
it's like a constant work.
Like no matter how old we are,we're still learning.
I'm also tired of fuckinglearning, but it is an ongoing
thing, thing that's hard.

(45:09):
Let's just being an adult ishaving to have some type of
resilience, because work, play,family, it's all a lot.
It's all a lot and there's,like you said, you know, there's
this, the different seasons.
I'm not, I'm not one that'slike up and down, but I'm like
what is balance?
What does this season look like?

(45:30):
Where is the next one like?
Right now it's a little bitrainy.
It's warm and rainy.
It's cloudy in my seasonthunderstorms maybe there are
parts of literally you were in agoddamn storm.
You were literally in a storm.

Speaker 2 (45:48):
I got caught in a storm the other day.

Speaker 1 (45:50):
That's what I'm talking about.

Speaker 2 (45:52):
It literally was completely bright out and I was
like you know what?
I'm going to go for a walk innature with my pup.
It's going to be amazing.
Then the sky fell and thenthere were tornadoes that
touched down in the area.
And here I am in the wildernessand I don't have enough time to

(46:13):
run home and I found thecommunity park and I went to the
safest location there and triedto wait it out, but it was wild
it was like night to day I waslike well at least I have this
building to keep us safe.

Speaker 1 (46:30):
I feel like it's also somewhat representation of
where you are Like so quick, outof the blue and like you had
the tools to go.
Okay, maybe let's just sit thefuck down for a minute.
I'm just going to, like, sitover here, hold it, hold my baby
.
We're going to breathe and it'skind of like where you are, like
you.
You know we've weaved it in andout, like work things, life

(46:51):
things, balancing, existing as ahuman.
Something that I think is superimportant to me and it sounds
like it's also important to youis like community.
I don't think that we are meantto be on this planet as like
single individuals and it, youknow, it might mean partners, it
might mean family, it mightmean chosen family.
What does community look likefor you?

(47:13):
Do you think that it'simportant for you?

Speaker 2 (47:16):
I think it's very much important to me because I
wouldn't be the woman that I amtoday if it wasn't for the
community and the people that Isurround myself with.
Growing up, like I hadmentioned, I struggled a lot
with reading.
Comprehension was somethingthat was very hard for me, and
it all started with Miss Bell,my kindergarten teacher, and

(47:39):
then my third grade teacher,miss Callum.
May she rest in peace.
But my mom wanted to retain mebecause she's like hooked on.
Phonics didn't work for her.
You know, her comprehensionisn't there and Ms Callum was
like she just has a differentstyle of learning and the way
that she comprehends things.
You know she has severe testanxiety and although I had
straight A's, she recognizedthat and tested me in the way

(48:01):
that I needed to be tested, youknow.
And I had another professor incollege same thing too.
He's like I know, you know thisinformation, but it's like test
comes around and you like,freak out, and that would happen
to me sometimes, like on camera, like scientists by trade.
You know, when I was with WWEit was like test red light, you
know, and then something wouldhappen and I would freak, I

(48:24):
would eventually snap out of it.
But it's like people only liketo look at, like the negative
stuff you know.
And it's like you're molded bycommunity and the people that
raise you.
And for me, I'm lucky enough tohave found so many mentors and
so many different kinds ofpeople that could tell that I

(48:44):
was a different kind ofindividual and I didn't tick the
same way that everyone else didand they would, you know, treat
me not special, but just theway I needed to be treated.
One of my mentors she's 91right now and she would always
tell me I'm like how are youthis cool, miss June?
And she's just like you knowwhat?

(49:05):
Because nobody is self-made asmuch as people think they are
self-made.
Yes, like it takes a communityto raise somebody and it takes
somebody being like hey, I cansee you're struggling, here's my
hand, let me help you out.
And it doesn't have tonecessarily be financially, it
could be emotionally, it couldbe intellectually, you know,

(49:26):
teaching you different skills.
She's like what about?
You know that third gradeteacher?
Or you know that fifth gradeteacher that helped you out, you
know that motivated you in away that nobody else did or gave
you the confidence that youdidn't think you had.
When people are like we don'tunderstand why you're so nice or

(49:46):
why you continue to help peopleout, that you know, take your
position or do this and that,and I'm like, well, the way that
I was raised and the type ofhuman that I want to be and the
type of human that I want to beremembered by, my legacy per se
is paying it forward.
Yeah, I wouldn't be who I am ifit wasn't for somebody that's
like hey, I can see you don'tfinancially come from a strong

(50:07):
background, I'm going tosecretly sponsor you for this,
you know, or I'm going to teachyou these tools that are going
to help you succeed.
So it's like when people thinkof pageants, they're like ah,
that's just a beauty pageant,you know, that's nothing, that's
just women being judged, beingjudged.

(50:29):
Well, they were very formativeyears for me that actually
helped me become the woman thatI am today, because I surrounded
myself by people whom I admired, women whom I admired and I
learned and I studied.
How did they become successful.
I learned how to articulate mythoughts.
I learned how to present myself.
I learned how to carry myselfand be the woman that I want

(50:51):
society to view me as and be.
I learned so many differenttools for so many different
toolboxes.
I learned how to fail becausedo you think that I won every
single pageant that I competedin?
I didn't compete in pageantsfrom when I was a kid.
I competed from 18 years old upuntil 24 years old.
I was a grown adult, you know,and I learned how to be even

(51:17):
more resilient.
I learned failure, I learnedopportunity.
I learned how to stand up formyself, I learned how to be able
to present myself, and I lovethat aspect of it.
Now are there other aspects thatare political aspects and this
and that, and blah, blah, blah,but I always choose to find the
good in every experience that Ihave.

(51:38):
Yes, there's so much bad, butit's like what was my takeaway?
What did I learn?
How did I grow as a human fromthis experience?
Way?
What did I learn?
How did I grow as a human fromthis experience?
And that's what helps, I wouldsay, maintain my resilience and
be able to bounce back, becauseit's like, okay, well, if I
didn't go to college, I wouldn'thave met this person, this
person to then, you know, havethe strength and the courage to

(52:01):
even apply to WWE onlineSomebody who didn't know really
too much, had no connections oranything.
You know, to then be able toapply to a show called Titan
Games.
You know, to be able to apply,or work, you know, for WWE for
five years, to then be able tomake connections and not be
afraid.
You know, once I failed in onecompany, essentially to be able

(52:24):
to get picked up by AEW, to thenget dropped by AEW.
To now try to figure out what'smy next thing.
You know, it's some doorsclosed for greater ones to open,
but it's like you gotta keepknocking because they're not
gonna come to you.
So I'm in the knocking processto see what door opens.

Speaker 1 (52:45):
Yeah, yeah, something that I also hear and navigating
through all of it isvulnerability Vulnerability with
others, vulnerability withyourself.
Failure is something that weall come through.
Go through, walk around, lookat it, go not for me, but she's
at your door.

(53:05):
It's like a whole thing and Ithink that some people don't see
the connection there.
What do you think theconnection is within
vulnerability and resilience?

Speaker 2 (53:19):
I feel when people can see your authenticity and
even if you have failed you knowthey it kind of helps give them
hope, I guess you could say,because if you don't fail and
you just hit after hit, afterhit, after hit, when finally
something doesn't hit, it couldbe more detrimental to some

(53:44):
people.
I'm used to failing, so I justlaugh at it now, but not laugh
at it as in like ha ha.
It's like okay, well, this is atest, this is a roadblock, this
is a hump I'm going to have toget over.
How are we going to equipourselves?
How are we going to find a wayto overcome this?

(54:06):
And I used to think and this issomething that you helped me
with, Jim Jimenica I used tojust try to figure everything
out myself and just telleveryone I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm
fine.
Now I've learned I'm not fineand I've learned to ask people
for help and people that I careabout, like, what is your

(54:30):
opinion on this?
And I try to kind of removemyself from the situation and
look at it from a differentperspective, rather than, oh,
poor me, poor me, poor me, okay,well, this is the situation.
Let's look at it at face value.
Okay, these are my feelings onit Doesn't mean that these are
going to be my feelings forever.

(54:50):
You know, how can I grow, howcan I learn from this?
Do I just have to let somethinggo?
Do I have to move on?
But at the end of the day, thechoice is mine.
So what is the choice that I'mgoing to choose to make?

Speaker 1 (55:04):
Yeah, yeah.
I think that's such aninteresting thing that we all
have to do.
And looking outside ofourselves, I try.
In the last few years I havehad lots of death and sadness.
I always saw people like, listen, I'm sad, but I'm not ugly, so
you might not see it, and youknow being able to step outside

(55:30):
and have people you trust go.
I have your best interests, andso thank you for trusting me.
Let me give you what I see,because when we're in the shit
of whatever it is, we don'talways see the thing and or we
don't always want to see thething right.
And so having those trustedpeople, having our community,

(55:51):
that are like I know you'repushing through, I know you're
doing all the things, but also Ican see how fucking tired you
are.
I can see that you need a nap.
I can see that you need a hug.
That's the vulnerability partsfor me, because it's like how
did you see through this?
I was doing so good masking upand we've had the conversation
like wearing a mask.

(56:11):
For me, resiliency sometimes isgoing back to presentation
versus reality.
Sometimes my resilience is fake.
It might look like, oh my God,she's thriving, she does this
and all this, but really it's inthat moment that you get to see
me, cause you don't see me onthe couch rolled up, you know,

(56:31):
eating snacks trying to stayhealthy.
Cesar, cesar, in case you'relistening, we're staying healthy
, like watching reality TV in adifferent language.
Because love is blind.
Brazil is amazing.
Pay me for all these plugs.
Pay me for all these plugs,play me for all these bugs.

(56:52):
Um and like, do you ever feellike you want to just take the
mascot?

Speaker 2 (56:57):
all the time, all the time.
But then it's one of thosethings that it's just like a lot
of people are counting on me.
You like a lot of people arecounting on me.
You know a lot of people arecounting on me to know that it's
going to be okay.
And I am vulnerable and cry infront of a lot of people that

(57:20):
I'm close to and, although theythink it's not helping, a lot of
them are like listen, I don'tknow what I can say and I'm like
you.
Just even listening is kindenough.
I got it off my chest, I got itout of just replaying in my
mind over and over and over andover again.

(57:43):
And I do, and I want to kind oftake the mask off a little bit
more.
I think it might be shocking toa lot of people.
Um, who knows?
I don't know it.

Speaker 1 (57:58):
Baby steps, right yeah, yeah, I think like for me
it's well, I kind of just jumpedinto shit.
I'm a different kind of Geminium, but I like, even with my
rape right like I was raped at21, it's all over the internet.
Um, I was raped at 21 but Ididn't talk to anyone about it

(58:20):
until I was almost 28 because Ihad an article coming out that
was being published and I waslike maybe I should tell people
before it comes out.
My friends were like what?
And that felt like a vulnerablething.
But it's also like parts of thevulnerability.
Like you said, you feel like youhave to hold that mask for
other people.
It's like there's this thingcalled the perfect survivor.

(58:43):
Like people are like, well,you're like the perfect survivor
, you're calm and you'renavigating and look at you go,
when in reality, that doesn'texist.
It's just where I'm at today.
And when I talk about trauma,people are like, well, how do
you get through it?
And I'm like, oh, that's notreal.
It's like, how do you navigateit?
How do you push through?

(59:08):
The same thing that would havetriggered me and throw me off.
It doesn't anymore.
Now I'm just like I see thatcoming, I can smell it and it
kind of feels the same way Likewhen we're talking about
resiliency and wearing our masks.
People just think you're thisperfect person, but in reality
does that feel extra weighted?

Speaker 2 (59:30):
does that feel extra weighted?
It does.
It does because it it makes itfeel sometimes that like, are
people going to be disappointedin me because I'm sad, you know,
kind of a thing.
But the one thing like, evenduring all this process I've
I've tried because a lot ofpeople like will text me and
they're like how's it going, howare you doing?
And I noticed I catch myselfand I'll be like I'm not well,
but, um, but it's kind of likemy family friendly reminder,

(59:53):
because I don't like being insuch a negative space.
I prefer lighthearted, you know,light things.
It's kind of like my check,where it's like, okay, I've
checked myself in, you know,validating these feelings, but
at the same time it's like, okay, well, how am I going to get

(01:00:15):
myself out of it?
And I don't know if that's theright way or the wrong way or
whatever the case may be.
Um, but it's working for meright now.
I was like no, I'm not well.
Actually People are like howare you?
I'm like, well, honestly, I'mnot well.
I don't have a job.
My personal life is what feelslike it's falling and crumbling.

(01:00:40):
But what can I do to controlthe controllables and how can I
put in the effort to make change.
What can I do?
Because, at the end of the day,the only person I can control
is myself, you know, and I allowmyself and give myself grace to

(01:01:00):
let it all out, but at the sametime I try not to live in that.

Speaker 1 (01:01:05):
Yeah yeah, being resilient is cute and shit, but
also it's a part of the humanexperience and it's just like a
part of all the other parts, ifyou know.
Two last questions.
If someone was like listeningand they're like, oh my God,
Dasha does all the things andblah, blah, blah.
What do you want them to know?

(01:01:26):
What do you want them to takeaway from?
You know, talking aboutresilience and also like the
reality of like yes, and beingresilient is a blessing and a
curse.

Speaker 2 (01:01:41):
It's very hard, but at the same time it's I.
I'm a firm believer that we allhave a purpose on this earth
and when we have served ourpurpose, then we depart.
And if I am fortunate enough towake up on the right side of
the dirt, I'm going to do mybest to continue to try to find

(01:02:04):
out what that purpose is.
You know, and whether you callthat resiliency or stubbornness
some may call it stubbornness Irefuse to add more negativity
into the world.
That's because I'm stubborn.
I refuse to add to it.

(01:02:25):
So I am going to continue totry to be an honest person and
work on being more vulnerable,because I just always make it
seem like everything's okay.
Yeah, it's hard.
I don't know what the rightanswer is.
I don't think anyone knows whatthe right answer is.
It's just what's right for youand what allows you to go to

(01:02:50):
sleep at night, you know, with aclear conscience and a level
head.
And that's just what I tried todo.
I try to do everything withlogic and when that fails, then
I use my heart.
But that's the scientist in meand I feel like that's just the
weird way that my brain is wired, you know, and is it weird?

(01:03:10):
I don't know, we're all weird.

Speaker 1 (01:03:12):
Honestly, I don't know anyone that's like perfect
and then perfect.
People freak me out, maybe RJ.
Well, rj and I did have thisconversation.
I'm like you know what?
There is no one that is justnice all the time.
There is no one that is justnice all the time.
There is no one that is justresilient all the time because
life is lifing at all ways.

Speaker 2 (01:03:30):
You might be like yeah, but no one's perfect
either, because what's perfectfor one person is not perfect
for the other people.
Absolutely, you know which camefirst, the chicken or the egg.
You know like what's perfect.
Perfect is what is sociallyacceptable for a group of people

(01:03:52):
.
You know it's depending whereyou're at.
It's like with pageantry orit's with any sort of
competition Any day a differentset of judges, a different
opinion of people.
Same thing could be true for acourt of law with a jury of your
peers.
You know it's what is it.
I think that's what we're alltrying to figure out.

Speaker 1 (01:04:14):
Yeah, which is?
It feels like this isn't thelast question, but it feels like
that there's like this goalpost, that's like moving all the
time, and so it's like, oh, Ifound me, okay, what.
Sometimes I just stop and go.
You do you goalpost?

(01:04:34):
I'm going to take a nap.

Speaker 2 (01:04:36):
Yeah, I need to take a nap too.
That's what I've learned.
But sometimes I can't shut mybrain off.
I'm like how do I take a nap?

Speaker 1 (01:04:44):
Here's the thing I love a nap in idea.
Okay, I can't actually takenaps, got it, I've never been a
nap Like time constraints orlike no, not even as like a
child Like I used to get introuble like daycare and stuff,
like they used to be like justlet her go play with the older
kids.
I could not.
I'm just not a napper.
I wonder if it's like no, it'snot FOMO, because I don't

(01:05:06):
actually care about doing thingswith other people like that.

Speaker 2 (01:05:09):
Or do you subconsciously care about it?

Speaker 1 (01:05:12):
No, I think in my twenties I did not, and I'm
closer to 40 than anything.
And no, my fucks have continuedto fly away.
But I think it's the brain.
I think I also have a brainthat's always like, functioning
and you know, like yourself,thinking about other people and
navigating, and then, like cool,other people are settled.
Now, what about my mess?

(01:05:33):
How do I get back to cleaningthat up?
And so I think there's thefunctioning brain, which is a
gift and a curse.

Speaker 2 (01:05:41):
Yeah, I think I fall victim to that.
A lot is.
You know, I'm a fixer, so it'slike trying to fix other
people's things.
Sometimes I just shove my stuffto the side, to the side, to
the side, and then it's like theuniverse and the world are like
guess what?
You can't figure this out rightnow.

(01:06:01):
Guess what time it is, it'syour time.

Speaker 1 (01:06:05):
Guess what time it is .

Speaker 2 (01:06:08):
It's you, let's focus on you.
It's your time guess what timeit is?
It's you, let's focus on yourtime to figure your things out.
And it's wild how, for mepersonally, it happens every
five years really, yeah, are youin a cycle, is it something?
Like stars, are the universe orsomething?
No, are you every five years.

Speaker 1 (01:06:24):
It's like you stop thinking about it.
Pardon, are you into likeastrology and stuff to like
figure out what's happening foryou in the five years I tried?

Speaker 2 (01:06:33):
going and looking and then it was like this
descending mood and thatdescending you gotta have some
again.
Community whatever and whateverI got confused and my brain was
already hurting, so I was justlike I wow, I'm an aries, but I
don't know anything else aboutit yeah, no, you gotta have a
person like.

Speaker 1 (01:06:51):
I had a friend who like map your whatever, my whole
chart?
Yeah, like my whole thing.
And I was like, how did you?
Because she studies the.
So I was.
This is where I'm likecommunity as someone that wants
to know the things but doesn'twant to learn how to do all the
things, cause I learned enough.
Can someone tell me and myfriend's like oh my God, I've

(01:07:12):
been studying this Great.
Can you come over?
Thanks.
So much.

Speaker 2 (01:07:15):
I've gotten the chart like handed to me and I'm like
how do?

Speaker 1 (01:07:19):
you read this.
No, you got to get someonethat'll read it to you.
Kind of navigate that, but Ithink it is interesting.
And last thing is like theresilience of it.
Resilience also comes withawareness.
If you're lucky and it soundslike your awareness is currently

(01:07:41):
in heightened, which for me,also in heightened awareness
means you are in an activegrowth stage.

Speaker 2 (01:07:49):
I'm trying which growth is hard.
I'm learning as an adult thatyou have to grow and change and
evolve, and I'm learning that Idon't have all of the answers to
everything, that I don't haveall of the answers to everything

(01:08:11):
, and I'm open to growing as ahuman to better society as a
whole, as a whole, if that'seven a possibility.
You know, like we, we go back tocommunity and it's like we have
so many different.
We have billions and billionsof people in this world and
everyone is completely different, know, so it's like how can I
better be of service as a humanto all of these different types

(01:08:34):
of personalities and people andget back to everyone, not being
mean to each other, hating eachother, being jealous of each
other, and just honestly, it'scrazy because, like RJ and I, we
didn't really get each other,like because the opposite,
complete and fuller opposite.
So, yeah, um, it's fascinatingto me.

(01:08:58):
I just like learning,especially when people are so
different and opposite, likewhat makes them tick, what ticks
them off, off, like why Me?
I'm a why person.
So I try, I'm in theadventuring, experimenting,
learning, why stage Will?
I ever get all the answers?
Probably not.

Speaker 1 (01:09:18):
No, because that goalpost keeps moving and
there's more questions.
Yep, so we talked about thehard things and I always like to
end the show with a fun thing.
Really, because I'm nosy, Iwant to know what's happening.
What is the wildest thing thatsomeone has texted, emailed I
just add emailed, emailed orDMed you in the last two weeks

(01:09:40):
and wildest relative?

Speaker 2 (01:09:45):
I mean, I am a female , so I do get unsolicited photos
and emails get weans.

Speaker 1 (01:09:51):
Are they sending weans?

Speaker 2 (01:09:53):
uh everything what's everything.

Speaker 1 (01:09:57):
What are you getting, buttholes?

Speaker 2 (01:10:00):
I.

Speaker 1 (01:10:01):
I haven't gotten that yet, thankfully oh, I was like
well, what's button?

Speaker 2 (01:10:06):
I mean like the messages themselves.
Some are detailed, some are not, Some requesting certain photos
.
Well, people think, like whenyou've lost it all or you know,
are vulnerable about certainstuff, that they can try to take
advantage of that.
And it's like no dude, sorry,Like not happening.

Speaker 1 (01:10:24):
We don't see you on TV.

Speaker 2 (01:10:27):
There isn't.
There isn't desperation in thatyou know like thankfully, um,
but yeah, I mean nothing toocrazy, weird.
I mean that's the usual stuffthat I get.

Speaker 1 (01:10:39):
But also I think your usual is weird for a lot of
people no one is sending mewings yeah I don't get in there,
I have requesting things, youknow.

Speaker 2 (01:10:53):
No, that's what I've been getting requests, you know,
because I don't know if theyjust think what's the weirdest
thing that's been requested ofyou?
Um armpit photos okay all right, listen, everyone's into their
own things.
I've gotten like soles bottomof your feet, that kind of stuff

(01:11:13):
, but I didn't know underarms.

Speaker 1 (01:11:16):
Yeah, armpits are big for people.
Some people like to smell them,people like to lick them.
I don't necessarily know abouta photo.
You know what else is a bigarea Behind the knee.

Speaker 2 (01:11:28):
I have not noticed that not knee crevice, hmm yeah
I have no bodies tonight yeah,it's coming.
Now someone's gonna be like Ishould ask to see the back of
her knee well, I'm not one topost that kind of stuff, so
you're gonna have to zoom in,like the rest of them see and

(01:11:49):
please, if you do, don't play inher dms with.

Speaker 1 (01:11:54):
It needs to be at least five figures.

Speaker 2 (01:11:56):
Thank you so much if you're gonna waste your time
danger zone and I rarely gocheck that out because it is a
scary place yeah, yeah, I was inmy.

Speaker 1 (01:12:05):
I was like we can make you money off there, but
it's fine, we're not doing that,we are moving positively.
Dasha does not want anyrequests unless it's for a job,
a real job, a solid job, not forwhatever you're coming up with.
Talking about armpits, Iappreciate the interest.

Speaker 2 (01:12:23):
Don't appreciate the interest.

Speaker 1 (01:12:26):
Don't say that because they're gonna be like
well, she appreciates theserequests.
No, she doesn't look at ussetting a boundary don't smile
and laugh, you know gosh, I'mtrying to help you not get weans
in your dms.
You're like it could be fun.

Speaker 2 (01:12:42):
No, it's not.
Yeah, I I mean, yeah, you, youdo get some uncomfortable stuff.
You know that you're just likethis is not okay and and no
world is it okay and stalkingpeople and sending you know
things to their houses and stufflike that.
It usually is not the rightthing to do.
Um, I'm just a regular kid, sothat's a little very strange and

(01:13:08):
shocking, but I mean it'snothing too crazy.
Yeah, we probably shouldn't dothat.

Speaker 1 (01:13:14):
But Dasha is nice, I'll be less nice.
Stop sending shit to people'shomes.
Stop being disgusting in DMs.
It's not flattering, it's scarysometimes and no one fucking
wants that with your creepy ass.
See, I could be like yourtranslator.
You're like, it's okay, I'mlike.
Actually, what she meant to saywas fuck around and find out

(01:13:38):
have a great day I mean, youdon't want to find out?
see, see, there it is.
See the translation it works.
It comes through.
Then, um, before you go, wherecan he, the she, they, them z z
everyone?
Where can they find you andkeep up with all the things that
you, you're doing and what'scoming?

(01:14:00):
How can they get in my business?

Speaker 2 (01:14:02):
you can follow me on Instagram, on X, under the
handle Dasha Correct.
I have a YouTube page.
I'm working on some stuff.
Mas Dasha is that I'm too oldfor TikTok, but I'm trying to
figure it out.
That's Mas Dasha as well.

Speaker 1 (01:14:24):
You're not too old for TikTok, it's for all ages.
Technology.
Well, I've seen some elders onthere.
You know what you have to do.
You need to get a Gen X person.
Got it.
You got to go back and findsome youth.

Speaker 2 (01:14:41):
Okay, that's what I do.

Speaker 1 (01:14:42):
I'm like, hey, what does this mean?
I know these new vernaculars inthis language.
Listen, my partner thinks it'sfunny to use riz.
He's like are you feeling?
I'm like shut up, you're 40.

Speaker 2 (01:14:57):
I just learned that it came from charisma.
I'm learning here, but I haveno riz.

Speaker 1 (01:15:05):
You're a Riz-er.
Is that a thing?
Did I make that a?

Speaker 2 (01:15:08):
thing, my something toilet.

Speaker 1 (01:15:11):
What.

Speaker 2 (01:15:11):
My nephew was telling me about.
It starts with an S.
I don't even remember what itwas called.
I checked out because Icouldn't handle it.
Skibbity toilet or somethinglike that.
It came from some YouTube videoSkibbity, skibbity, that's what
it was.
Skibbity skibbity, that's whatit was.
Skibbity Toilet what does thatmean?
Just Google it.

Speaker 1 (01:15:31):
Alright, y'all, we're going to leave you with some
things to Google Skibbity Toilet.
Leave a comment.
You can leave comments here.
Until next time, y'all.