June 27, 2025 • 33 mins
It's Alun's turn this week, as he relives one of his greatest travel stories! Whilst walking the streets of Johannesburg, South Africa, he was attacked and mugged by a Zimbabwean gang; the gang were armed with knives, machetes, and a rusty screwdriver!
After a year travelling the continent of Africa, and with a flight to New Zealand booked for the very next day, was Alun lucky to escape or did he push his luck too far? Tune in to hear the full story!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Alan's greatest travel story. Let's go.
welcome to this episode of Tripology, the only travel
(00:20):
podcast in the world where the hosts are actually travelling
full time. I'm Alan and I'm here with the
ever averse Adam. We're still here, we're still in
Manila, we're still together. And we're still telling our
greatest travel stories. Last week, we heard, I mean, a
story about you coming face to face with an orangutan.
A story about you nearly diving under the ocean 17 meters,
(00:44):
drinking sea water like some sort of merman, mermaid man
merman. Merman yeah, I think it's
politically correct to say Mer person.
A Mer person that was you 17 meters.
I was diving, I was nearly dying, and I had a lot of fun on
last week's episode. But this week, Oh my God.
Well. We've got to tell my greatest
travel story and I don't know ifit's my greatest moment.
(01:06):
I don't know if it's my greatesttravel story.
It's certainly the time that wasin most danger and it's
certainly the time where when I've told this story in the
hostel common rooms around the world, people seem very
interested in this story. I've teased it numerous times.
It's the story of me getting absolutely mugged to high heaven
in Johannesburg. Now, I've told this story many,
(01:30):
many times. I've actually told it on the
Internet before, okay, and various other podcasts.
But this is going to be the mostdetail I've ever spoken about
this story in. So that's nice, isn't?
It very nice, and it's not like you've been keeping this one in
the locker per se, but I think if there ever was a moment to
bring this out, it's right now. It's right now because last week
we announced a brand new sectionof our website and what will be
(01:54):
a brand new section of our show starting from next week.
It's Tales of a Trip. If you go right now to
tripologypodcast.com/tales of a Trip, there's also a link in the
description of this episode. Wherever you're watching it or
listening to it, you can go. You'll find a big red button
where you can record 3 minutes of your greatest travel story.
(02:15):
The ones we like, the ones we think are beautiful, the ones
that are dangerous or romantic or memorable or just, you know,
the kind of story that you want to hear, the kind of story that
gets people all gathering round in a hostile common room.
Yeah, those are the stories we want.
We're going to play one every week.
Anthropology. We're going to talk about it.
It's a brand new feature. Go and record yours right now.
(02:35):
Yeah, I can't wait. I mean, the inspiring story and
the experiences that people share keep us going.
And I've got no doubt that by broadcasting those and giving
other people, fellow backpackersand peers a chance to do that as
well, I mean, it's an amazing way to build community.
And we can't wait to hear all ofthem.
I'm excited about it very, very much.
Yeah. So go and do that.
Tales of the trip. We'll want to hear your stories.
(02:57):
The story I'm about to tell. Perhaps if I have been keeping
it in my proverbial travel locker, the reason is because it
paints travel in a very specificlight, because it is the time
where I've been in the most danger.
It's a dangerous story. It's a story in which I behave
quite stupidly and I always liketo put my front foot forward
(03:18):
when it comes to telling people you should go travelling.
I like to tell the stories of mejumping into the Nile at
sundown, looking after a baby monkey, All the things that I
couldn't have done if I'd just chosen a life in the UK.
But travel has awarded me the experience of I love travel
almost more than anyone else I've ever met.
I want everyone to travel. I love it.
(03:39):
I love it so much. This story is a story about the
times where travel has been the most difficult, which in the
time where things have got really, really tough for me.
Yeah, very few people that that we meet, I suppose, prioritize
travel in the same way. I think if you want to travel
for 10 years or more and make sure that you keep on
travelling, you have to make sacrifices.
(04:00):
Obviously it's very difficult and you've obviously done that.
I just wondered whether what do you think it's necessary in
order to appreciate or understand travelling the way
that we're able to or the way that many people listening to
this will be able to? Do you think it's important to
have lots of experiences, both positive and negative, right at
opposite ends of the spectrum for to get that sort of overview
(04:20):
of what backpacking for a long time is really like?
I think life is holistic. It's full of things, isn't it?
Life is this crazy things where if you were just on a level all
the time, not experiencing the highs, not experiencing the
lows, I don't think you could look back on that existence and
be like that was fulfilling in any way.
One of the reasons why travel isso great and I love it so much
(04:42):
is because it evolves me as a person and you cannot be evolved
by positive experience. This event that happened to me
shaped me in a fundamental way, not because of what happened to
me during it or what was snowball to happen in the, in
the weeks post this event. Yeah, let me start from the top
and give you some context, OK? I've been travelling around the
continent of Africa, yeah, for our whole year.
(05:05):
And this story takes place on myvery, very last day on the
continent. So I mean you, you've already
said multiple times to me in private, but also you've said it
on the podcast. I mean, Africa, if we're ever
going to choose or or sort of a hierarchy of continents in terms
of what's easy to backpack and what isn't, Africa's about as
hard as it gets. So I would imagine isn't it?
(05:26):
Yeah, it's I I've spent a year on every continent travelling
now apart from Antarctica, so I can't speak to Antarctica, but
Africa is definitely the most challenging continent to travel.
In terms of infrastructure? Yeah, in terms of everything,
it's like it's not the most fun place all the time in the way
(05:46):
that South America is or North America is or Europe is, or
Australia. These are places which are
really dynamic and fun. You can find people and do
things all the time. Africa was hard.
I started in Israel and I travelled all over land.
I had to take a flight from Ethiopia down to Kenya so
because I couldn't get a visa. But the in general, I was just
(06:07):
taking trains and buses over land all the way from Israel all
the way down through to South Africa.
That took a long time. And I mean, I did some crazy,
crazy, beautiful things in that time.
I went on the safari, obviously saw the pyramids of Giza up at
the top, but inside the pyramidslike tour and a lot of
orphanages had amazing, amazing experiences.
(06:29):
But I was travelling with a partner for a lot of it.
If I wasn't, I would have been very, very alone indeed.
Like really not hostels available.
I was in guest houses. I was going on sometimes buses
and trains up to 72 hours, 55 hours long, long journeys.
It was hard. Yeah, and I know that one of the
things you like about backpacking is the culture and
(06:51):
meeting other backpackers. Not many backpackers doing a
similar thing. Certainly not in the towns and
places that I was seeking out and working.
I was trying at this point in mylife to experience a whole new
side of life and to see what youknow, I have an English language
degree. I was trying to teach.
I was trying to ingratiate myself in communities and like
learn about what it was to have community in that sense, see
(07:12):
what a difference I could make. We've talked about voluntarism a
lot in the podcast. There's episodes where I talk
about my opinion on teaching in Africa and how that's evolved
over time. It was an incredibly rewarding
experience. I'm glad I was there.
This was my last day in Africa, a continent that I had love
affair with, I thought was beautiful, I cared about very
much and I had a flight to New Zealand that evening.
(07:36):
Yeah, Yeah. What, what, what a time are you?
Are you thinking at this point that you've managed to get
through a year in Africa unscathed or, you know, I don't
know if you compartmentalize different experiences.
I hope overall it was positive. Yeah.
But was that anything that was going through your head because
you were in Joburg, which hasn'tgot the best reputation, fair to
say. Yeah, Joburg is where I finished
(07:58):
my African adventure by way of starting a road trip in Cape
Town and doing this route. It's called the Garden.
Route. Nicely drive all the way from
Cape Town, finishing Johannesburg.
I'd made two incredible friends,one of which is one of my best
friends to this day. He's friend of the show we've
talked about most times, Wagner,the Brazilian, We were together,
(08:20):
we had this amazing journey. And then Wagner and Ben, the
other friend I was doing the road trip with, left.
OK, so I was on my own for the first time in a very, very long
time. I'd been travelling with my
partner and then I was travelling with them.
It was a crazy, beautiful socialexperience.
And then suddenly I found myselfin Johannesburg, the most
dangerous city in the world. Many people would say yeah, and
(08:43):
I was on my own with one final day in Africa.
That's a funny headspace to be in.
Yeah, sure. I mean Joburg itself, if we've
got, if you're able to just describe it, because I've been
to lots of places that people say are very dangerous, maybe
places, places like even Manila where we're in now, we haven't
felt in danger one bit. And we've, we've been to some of
the the rough areas, Mexico City, he was somewhere I was
(09:05):
told was incredibly dangerous. OK, you've got to have your wits
about you, but you'll probably be fine.
Joburg, different story. Yeah, Joburg is renowned in the
backpacking world because there's like a street with some
hostels on some restaurants and the hostel.
I mean, I don't know how this has evolved now, but we're
talking 2017, OK? The hostel said to me, don't
(09:27):
leave the street, but stay in the hostel.
Go and get some food. Don't go out into Joburg, it's
not safe for you. Sure.
Yeah, yeah. Which is advice that in ordinary
circumstance I would have heeded.
Apart from the fact that I'd spent such a long time in the
continent, I knew that I was about to start a whole new life
(09:48):
in New Zealand and I wanted one last sort of taste and.
I've got through a year Africa, see what you can throw at me
and. I thought, you know, I don't
want to cower in this hostel forfear of the city around me.
I googled something which I was fond of then I'm still in fond
(10:09):
of to this day, a free walking tour.
My intention was I was going to leave the hostel.
There's a reason it's fucking free.
Yeah, go on. Yeah, I had.
I had a bag with me because it was my last day.
I I still don't fully understandwhat I was thinking, but I had a
bag with me that had more thingsin than I ever would normally
(10:30):
carry in. This bag had my passport, my
glasses, my bank cards, my money.
Pashanka might the original Pashanka.
Arrived it. Was like a day pack, but it had
a bunch of stuff in. I think because my intention was
to leave my clothes to the hospital, go out with this day
pack and do The Walking talk, come back quickly, grab my
clothes and go off to the airport.
(10:51):
Obviously I could have left my passport in my big bag.
Didn't do that. Yeah, what you've described is
basically a one stop shop for a thief.
Yeah, and I'd been travelling now in total for about 3 years,
so I thought I felt confident. I go to the site of this walking
tour and I'm there with my bag and I'm walking to the meeting
(11:13):
point thinking, oh it's going tobe great.
I'll do a free walking tour of Joburg and then finish.
I'm going to have such a relaxing day.
After that, I'll go to a cafe, go back to the hostel and get my
flight. Yeah, straightforward.
It's in this sort of busy area by a train station, and I
remember walking down the streetone time and like couldn't find
like look out for the person with the orange umbrella, find
(11:34):
the person with the. Orange.
Oh, that's an orangutan. Yeah, exactly.
And so I sort of double back. Yeah.
Where is the start of this walking tour now?
Something happens a lot when you're a Mizungu on the
continent of Africa. Mazungu means someone with white
skin. OK.
You attract a lot of attention wherever you go.
(11:56):
Less so in South Africa than therest of the continent.
I spent a lot of time in East Africa.
There you're like constantly, you're an object of people's
attention because you're, and often times for me, the only
white person that's ever visitedthat little place, right?
And, and it's like a small town or they've just never seen a
Mazungu before. Sure.
So you're kind of used to attracting attention.
(12:16):
I certainly was. Is that used as a like in a
derogatory way? Is it kind of a racial slur or
is it just the word for someone with white skin?
Yeah, no, it's actually like it's a, it's a very common term.
It's commonly used and it's not particularly offensive in any
way. Cool means someone with white
skin. It sounds cool.
It's not used in South Africa, that word.
It's just reusing the rest of the continent.
Oh, right, gotcha. So I'm walking down the street
(12:37):
and I felt someone sort of like put a hand on my shoulder.
OK, And my response wasn't one of anxiety as an I just kind of
went Oh no, you know, no, thank you.
Like sorry, I just carried. I've got I'm going to a tour
carried on walking. Oh yeah, he thought.
He's maybe just someone trying to get your attention to sell
something or or whatever. Yeah.
And then I carry on walking and with urgency, the steps continue
(12:59):
behind me. And then a more firm hand placed
on my shoulder. And that it sort of turns me
around and there's a guy there and he like has a bit of a stern
look on his face. Sure, yeah.
And I'm suddenly aware that my back is kind of against a fence.
I was walking along the street and there's, like, a fence on my
(13:20):
back. Yeah.
And this guy turns to me and looks me straight in the eye.
And initially I'm like, oh, get off me man, Stop.
Right. But then he looks at me like he
ain't stopping. I'm against this wall and I see
from across the road 5 other mencharging out of the building
(13:41):
towards me. Are they?
Clearly like the same group. This guy's got his hand on my
shoulder and against the wall, five guys running towards me.
I feel completely trapped. My initial reaction is to try
and shake him off, but I'm surrounded so quickly by 6
people, All of them I notice brandishing makeshift weapons.
(14:05):
I see a machete. I see a knife and worst of all,
the thing that I still can viscerally see in my mind's eye
to this day. One of them was holding a rusty
screwdriver so chills down my spine.
Let's go to a brief meditation break.
(14:26):
Sometimes when traveling, accidents happen.
Oh, I've fallen off a helicopterand broken my nose.
That's why it's always so important to have travel
insurance. And when you do need insurance,
we recommend Safety Wing. There's a link in the
description. Click it.
Support the podcast. Like an adrenal gland quick
firing through the mind of a trapped tourist, allow your
(14:50):
conscious mind to return to yourbrain.
As I'm pushed against a fence, surrounded by no less than six
people, The guy that initially stopped me, five others all
brandishing weapons. I see that screwdriver.
I think there is nothing I want less than that in my body.
Did you already at this point, you knew the score like you knew
(15:12):
exactly what was going on. There was there's no way these
guys were just chances that were, you know, testing your
whatever. Did did you think in that
moment, this is somewhere where the rules don't apply?
Because that's what scares the shit out of me is when you go to
countries where maybe the value of life is slightly different
and it doesn't. It doesn't matter if you're a
wealthy tourist or whatever. They simply don't care.
(15:34):
It's difficult to know what my initial reaction was.
My memory is that at first my adrenal glands fired and I was
like, what the hell, get off me,get off me.
And then you see the weaponry and suddenly you, like, shrink
into yourself. You're like, Oh my God.
I remember putting my hands up and being like, there's no way
(15:55):
out of this. Take, take everything.
Oh wow. Like because there's nothing you
can do. There's like no martial artist
in the world that can take on 6 people with weapons.
It's just impossible. And you didn't even think about
like speak. I mean, I don't know what's
going through your head. Obviously you're you're probably
shitting yourself, but there's no way of getting out of this
through like conversation or whatever.
You just, you just knew. I think I may be shouted.
(16:16):
Will anyone help me or somethinglike that?
Was it busy? Was it like exactly where you
were with a lots of people walking around?
I was. On a pretty busy St.
That's what's so fucking scary, yeah.
On a pretty busy St. in broad daylight.
But because the fence is againstmy back and there's so many of
them I'm like semi circled sure.So there's no way I can just
like run like I did when I was mugged in Bangalore.
Yeah. Did you feel like just before,
(16:38):
in the moments before, I don't know if you can think back to
this. Did you feel like you were being
looked at or watched or attracting attention in any way?
No. But in Insight now, I sort of do
think the reason why it happenedis because I doubled back,
right. I like, went down that street.
Maybe they noticed what the hell, there's a Mazungu like
walking down the street. And then I came back and they
were like, prepared for me. Sure, Yeah.
(17:00):
Yeah, you don't miss an opportunity twice.
Yeah, so God, So they're surrounding me.
The weapons are fucked. I mean, I don't know why I
would, yeah. I put my hands up.
They before the bag tore I was having a little day pack and
they cut the straps with the machete.
Off your back. Yeah, off my back, they grab it.
(17:22):
So that's the passport, the wallet, the bank cards, all my
cash. There's the my glasses are in
there, like £300 worth of glasses, everything just taken
off my back in a in a complete bag like that.
Do you even care though? Like, is it the the fear of
having something done to you with, you know, physical harm
that would be so great, like a machete or a screwdriver or
(17:45):
something like that? Are you thinking, Oh my God,
I've got so much in my bag, Please don't take that.
Or are you just thinking do whatever I need to do to not?
Get stabbed. I just didn't want that
screwdriver anywhere near me. But I was like angry.
I was like, how is this happening?
How are you doing this? Is no one going to say anything?
It's like no one. There was a woman I remember
actually to my right, she was selling stuff like she was sat
(18:08):
with a pot of something. I was like, this is crazy.
Will no one do anything? I mean, what she's supposed to
do, right? But I felt so blown away.
This was happening in the middleof the day.
Yeah, they took that. They obviously took my phone
from my pocket. They went through my pockets.
They just searched me and just took everything.
Right. Oh my God.
And then they run towards the place they came out of.
(18:30):
There's a building across the street and they all run.
One of them he like sets off running and then turns back,
looks at me and cracks me in theface, punches me.
He lands a punch flush so on thecheekbone of my of my eye going
into my nose. Jesus Christ.
And I remember like turning withit.
(18:53):
Yeah. And but a knowing immediately
they didn't hurt me as much as Ithought I was going to.
OK. Like he was wearing a ring and
it caught my nose so I was bleeding.
Jesus Christ. But I remember like, that's so
awful, like seeing that was about to happen and turning and,
and, and then being like, oh, thank God I'm not knocked out.
(19:13):
And my first thought was like, I'm conscious, I'm OK, I'm OK.
And I like come back up and he's, he's running off into the
building and they're all just, they're gone.
Yeah, well. And so I sit, then I'm like,
I've got nothing. I don't know how to get back to
my hostel. I don't know how to do anything
right. I've got no passport, no phone,
and I'm just like, taking a moment to realize what's just
(19:35):
happened because this all happens in a matter of 30
seconds, Yeah. Are you thankful, or you're just
not hurt, or you're just frustrated?
I'm so upset. Very.
Scared. I'm so frustrated and then I
start thinking about what's justhappened and I'm like what?
What happens now? Like I've not got a passport.
I've got, Oh my God, my flight to New Zealand.
I was supposed to go to New Zealand to get a job, to start a
new life, to like my next year of my life is going to be me
(19:58):
working in New Zealand. I can't do that anymore.
I've not got a passport. I can't.
What do I do? And then I started thinking,
I've not seen my family in threeyears.
And now I'm going to go to the embassy.
I'm going to get an emergency flight back to the only place
that you can without a passport,your home country, the UK.
I'm going to text my mom and say.
I'm, I'm sorry, like you have topick me up from the airport.
(20:19):
I've got no phone, no money, no passport.
I've had to take an emergency flight like.
It is a complete 180 swing, isn't it?
From what you were going to whatyou were thinking of doing is at
the absolute bottom end, from what you thought you were, where
you should be super excited to start a new life in New Zealand.
And then it's just the because in isolation, being mugged like
that is horrific. It's horrendous.
(20:41):
But for it to have had that impact as well on what you were
about to do, especially so close.
I was just in despair. I remember I like SAT and I was
like. You didn't even leave the
location. No, that is what what worse they
could do to me really. I I remember thinking about that
concept. That concept really stuck with
me in a way that I actually think was indicative of some
trauma that I've had to work outlater.
(21:03):
The thing that really stuck withme as the the non negotiable,
the awful thing was that I'd have to go home and admit to my
family that like, I, I was doingthis thing, this travel, I got
fucked up and now I like, I'm returning to you like a prodigal
son. That's like being damaged and is
(21:24):
fucked and like needs help and I'm going to have to be at my
this whole plan has just been shattered.
The whole rest of my life has been shattered.
Travel was everything to me at that point, unhealthily so, and
I just couldn't bear it. And so I did something which no
one should ever, ever do. It's the most stupid, stupid
thing that you can possibly do in this situation.
(21:46):
I got up and I went over to the house that they'd all run into
and I knocked on the door. Yeah, yeah.
I mean, well, I mean, you, you want to call me doing that And
I'm sure I, I don't even think this is one of those, oh, you
don't know what you would, how you would react in this
situation. I'm I'm absolutely 100% certain
I would not have gone over to that building.
And these are the actions of someone for whom travel was not
(22:07):
just something they were doing. It was all they knew how to do
at that point. And I was obsessed with it, and
it was all I could fathom doing.And it really, you know, it's
emotional to say this and it's tragic, but for me it was like
to stop me from travelling at that point was akin to killing
me. Like I couldn't hack not
travelling. So I knock on the door and one
(22:28):
of the guys, not the guy that punched me, one of the other
ones opens the door and looks atme like, kid, what the fuck are
you doing? I remember the look.
He was like, what? Is incredulous.
Can't believe the audacity. Are you serious?
Stupid to say. Yeah, Yeah.
And I said, please, just give memy passport back.
(22:52):
Yeah, I all like, you win, please can I have my passport?
And he stared at me like, what the fuck?
And he slammed the door. Yeah.
And I'm like, what the fuck? What do I do now?
Same. Same, horrible, horrible
feeling. And I just slumped on the
(23:14):
curbside right outside the door.Oh my God.
Like. Fuck this.
Everything, the weight of it allcrushing down on me.
I waited and I waited, and afterabout what probably felt like
longer was probably about two minutes, that guy opened the
door, spits on the ground, throws my passport and my
(23:34):
wallet. Oh, empty, but with my ID still
in there. Yeah, yeah.
Throws it down on the ground. Yeah, and.
And looks at me with what I think was maybe pity, maybe a
little bit of respect that like I had the stones to, to do that.
Yeah. I don't know.
(23:55):
It was a look that I've never seen before or since.
It was like a spectrum of human emotion that I've never quite
fully understood. The way he looked at me when he
did that, spit and threw those objects down to me.
Yeah, either this guy's stupid or he's desperate.
And then he slammed the door again.
Yeah. And that was it.
I stuffed the passport so deep down my underpants.
Yeah, I remember like so worriedI was going to get mugged again.
(24:18):
Oh yeah, that would have been, yeah.
So I like. Directly.
Actually I. Take the passport and I shoved
it like right down my pants and I just bolt off in the other
direction. Yeah, shit.
I mean, it's yeah, extraordinary, absolutely
extraordinary. Yeah, it was crazy.
So then obviously I how do I, how the fuck do I get home, like
back to the hostel? Because I've got no money, no
phone, no way of looking anything up.
(24:39):
Yeah, it didn't have like brief or some sort of way of
orientating yourself. No way, nothing to go.
I. Got an Uber to the place that I
was like I didn't know where thefuck I was.
I was so clueless. I found a police officer.
Yeah, and. I said I've just been robbed,
like I need help, like I'm fucked.
And he went like, if you're South African even, like where,
(25:01):
where are they these people? We can go and challenge them.
Go and get your stuff back. And I was like, they'll kill me
if I if I go back there with younow, like just give me a
password. I can't fathom doing that.
Did you trust the police at thispoint?
No, no, the police officer, there was two of them.
(25:22):
I I think that, I mean, I was bleeding out of my nose.
The way they spoke to me was like silly little boy, this
happens all the time. Do you want us to go and saw it?
It's going to be pretty fucking crazy if we do.
They had guns now. We can go in that building and
have a say, but your stuff is gone.
Like we can go and like confrontthem.
And I was like, I don't want to do that, but I just need to get
(25:46):
home. They're like rot kit in the back
of the squad car. So I was like, sorry, say that
again. Pretty good accent, I was
impressed. That's how I ended up in the
back of these guys. Police car.
Right. They start driving me through
Johannesburg in the general direction of my hostel.
But in the middle of the fuckingdrive, yeah, they get a phone
(26:07):
call and they have to veer off. They go right, We've got to deal
with these gang bangers. They turn right and then get out
of the car and fucking leave. I'm in the back seat of a
Johannesburg police squad car and they're going off dealing
with some gang bangers and I'm just there on the back seat like
(26:30):
Oh my fucking God, what the hell?
Yeah, talk about sitting duck. Fucking hell.
Yeah, I don't know. I in my mind's eye, I can hear
him. There was like gunshots going
off. Yeah.
I'm just waiting in the back of this car for 15 minutes. 15
minutes on your own in a police car?
Yeah. And I like slide, but I lie down
on the seat, like with my head down that holy fucking shit.
(26:50):
Holy fucking shit. What the hell?
Yeah. Like how have I just gone from
being mugged to now being in theback of a cop car dealing with
gang bangers? A gang banger.
Just Can you explain to me what that is?
It's. Just a gangster.
OK, right. Nothing, nothing kinky.
Yeah, it's not illegal to to be a gang.
It's not illegal to. Well, it is illegal to gangbang,
but not for the reasons you. So yeah, that's just what an
(27:14):
awful position to be in. So I would say maybe even a
downgrade being lit up like a Christmas tree saying come and
rob me, I'm in a police car, there's no one here because, I
mean, even the car could have got jacked, couldn't it?
Or something at the least. It was mental.
They got back in efforts a few minutes.
They were like, you see how muchwe have to deal with in the
city. You have held that.
They were annoyed at me for likekeeping them from their job.
(27:34):
They're like, oh, I will take you to your fucking hostel.
They started driving. They got another call.
They got a call saying you've got to go and deal with some
more gang bangers. Yeah.
The guy in the passenger seat turns to me and get out the
fucking car. You're taking too long.
We can't take you to the hostel.Get out the fucking car.
Wow. They kicked me out of the police
car in the middle of fucking nowhere.
(27:55):
Oh my. God, I mean, yeah, I've, I've
heard the story in little bits. I didn't realize that this has
happened either. Give me a fucking break.
Totally. I'm walking around with my
passport between my ass cheeks in my underpants just desperate
to like. I find a hotel.
I go in and I say like hey guys I'm so fucked can someone just
(28:19):
help me for free because I have no money, no phone no anything.
Can someone drive me to my hotel?
Even the police won't help me. Even the police won't help me
because they've got what to do with the gang bangers.
Wow. So eventually one of the
concierges from the hotel drove me to the hostel.
We get there and he's like, pay me.
(28:40):
Oh, brilliant. I'm like.
No, no, no, no, no, no. I got so angry really, because I
was so done at this point. I said, what did you fucking say
I Ted to you that I've been mugged and need this right away?
Can someone just fucking help mein this fucking city?
Can someone give me a break? I think he was so like, he's got
(29:00):
this kid bleeding with a passport down his pants,
shouting at him in his car. He was just like, OK, yeah, go
out. Just go out.
Just go. Oh man, so I mean, there's more
to the story in the sense that then like I, I had to go to the
police station to try and try and get insurance.
Insurance eventually didn't pay out because it turns out I
(29:21):
wasn't using safety wing where you can buy insurance, you know,
after when you're in, when you're travelling.
I've got insurance when I wasn'tin my home country and validated
it. That's why you should always use
safety wing or similar. Link in the description.
Oh. My goodness.
So you know, eventually I got onon my flight and and got to New
Zealand. But my God, what a horrible,
(29:41):
horrible, brutal experience thatall was.
Yeah, it's absolutely shocking. I remember you saying actually
that when you spoke to the police, they said that they very
rarely if ever see something like this happen and mugging of
a tourist and the person isn't at least stabbed.
They said it's some is Zimbabwean gangs.
What did that to you? Yeah, he was Australian.
(30:06):
He said, I'll hate that I've been given this transfer to say
everything. Well, it seems to be a cop in
Sydney and now, no, he said it'svery unusual.
It's very unusual for you to have got out of that situation
with no wounds. I said look at the fucking state
of my nose. He went, that's not a wound.
Yeah. And what I think for me, how I
feel when you're telling me thatstory is a what an amazing South
(30:28):
African accent. Yeah, but B, in that moment when
if I think I was being pinned upor being mugged and and a couple
of things in that kind of realm of happened to be absolutely
nowhere near as scary or severe or dangerous as that.
But even even you telling me that story, I think I would
still be thinking, OK, they've got weapons, they've got a
machete, they've got horrible rusty screwdriver.
(30:50):
They're probably not going to use it.
But that is that's not true, butthey absolutely will use it.
The same rules do not apply justbecause you wouldn't do that in
the UK or in, you know, any other country where things are
slightly different is different value.
You know, they value life slightly differently.
Them stabbing you is the same asthem going to.
(31:10):
The shop same number of consequences yeah, I'll say
this. South Africa, one of my
favourite countries in the world.
I actually had an amazing time there.
This was just my last day without that last day, one of my
favourite countries ever. But I'll say this against it
back then, don't know if it's changed now.
The consequences for them not stabbing me were the same as the
consequences for them stabbing me.
(31:31):
And in both scenarios that was 0.
Yeah, nothing happens. They just had my shit, so it was
crazy. There's some more stuff to that
story that maybe I'll tell in the Patreon section.
We got patreon.com/tripology podcast.
This is the last week where you can sign up to our Patreon and
get a coupon code for the original artwork T-shirt that
were this exclusive for just ourPatreon audience.
(31:53):
It's a good time to sign up. We also have an exclusive
Discord. You get episodes 24 hours early
in the $2.00 tier. There's like amazing stuff over
there. You should definitely sign up.
Next week is going to be a very,very special week for Tripology.
We're going to launch a whole new format.
It's going to be bigger, better.We're striving to be the number
one travel podcast in the world by the end of the year.
(32:14):
So tell your friends, hey, next week, let's all gather together.
Let's listen to Tripology podcast.
It's going to be the start of a new era.
Thank you. Thank you for being one of the
Ogs, one of the people listeningright now before we start this
incredible, incredible journey. That was my greatest travel
story. I would love to hear yours.
Trilogy podcast.com/tales of theTrip record, your best travel
(32:36):
story. We'll play them going on from
next week. Yeah, thanks ever so much for
your support. It's amazing.
We can't wait. It's a really exciting time for
us both. Exciting time for the show,
exciting time for the listeners.Sign up to Patreon.
Get one of these T-shirts. I I usually wear it every week.
If you've not seen it before, have a little look at the video.
I can't wait to hear what else is going on in the Patreon
section mate, it's gripping stuff.
Stay tuned and we'll see you on the next one.
(32:57):
We'll see you there. Bye bye.
Alan's greatest travel story. Let's go.
welcome to this episode of Tripology, the only travel
(00:20):
podcast in the world where the hosts are actually travelling
full time. I'm Alan and I'm here with the
ever averse Adam. We're still here, we're still in
Manila, we're still together. And we're still telling our
greatest travel stories. Last week, we heard, I mean, a
story about you coming face to face with an orangutan.
A story about you nearly diving under the ocean 17 meters,
(00:44):
drinking sea water like some sort of merman, mermaid man
merman. Merman yeah, I think it's
politically correct to say Mer person.
A Mer person that was you 17 meters.
I was diving, I was nearly dying, and I had a lot of fun on
last week's episode. But this week, Oh my God.
Well. We've got to tell my greatest
travel story and I don't know ifit's my greatest moment.
(01:06):
I don't know if it's my greatesttravel story.
It's certainly the time that wasin most danger and it's
certainly the time where when I've told this story in the
hostel common rooms around the world, people seem very
interested in this story. I've teased it numerous times.
It's the story of me getting absolutely mugged to high heaven
in Johannesburg. Now, I've told this story many,
(01:30):
many times. I've actually told it on the
Internet before, okay, and various other podcasts.
But this is going to be the mostdetail I've ever spoken about
this story in. So that's nice, isn't?
It very nice, and it's not like you've been keeping this one in
the locker per se, but I think if there ever was a moment to
bring this out, it's right now. It's right now because last week
we announced a brand new sectionof our website and what will be
(01:54):
a brand new section of our show starting from next week.
It's Tales of a Trip. If you go right now to
tripologypodcast.com/tales of a Trip, there's also a link in the
description of this episode. Wherever you're watching it or
listening to it, you can go. You'll find a big red button
where you can record 3 minutes of your greatest travel story.
(02:15):
The ones we like, the ones we think are beautiful, the ones
that are dangerous or romantic or memorable or just, you know,
the kind of story that you want to hear, the kind of story that
gets people all gathering round in a hostile common room.
Yeah, those are the stories we want.
We're going to play one every week.
Anthropology. We're going to talk about it.
It's a brand new feature. Go and record yours right now.
(02:35):
Yeah, I can't wait. I mean, the inspiring story and
the experiences that people share keep us going.
And I've got no doubt that by broadcasting those and giving
other people, fellow backpackersand peers a chance to do that as
well, I mean, it's an amazing way to build community.
And we can't wait to hear all ofthem.
I'm excited about it very, very much.
Yeah. So go and do that.
Tales of the trip. We'll want to hear your stories.
(02:57):
The story I'm about to tell. Perhaps if I have been keeping
it in my proverbial travel locker, the reason is because it
paints travel in a very specificlight, because it is the time
where I've been in the most danger.
It's a dangerous story. It's a story in which I behave
quite stupidly and I always liketo put my front foot forward
(03:18):
when it comes to telling people you should go travelling.
I like to tell the stories of mejumping into the Nile at
sundown, looking after a baby monkey, All the things that I
couldn't have done if I'd just chosen a life in the UK.
But travel has awarded me the experience of I love travel
almost more than anyone else I've ever met.
I want everyone to travel. I love it.
(03:39):
I love it so much. This story is a story about the
times where travel has been the most difficult, which in the
time where things have got really, really tough for me.
Yeah, very few people that that we meet, I suppose, prioritize
travel in the same way. I think if you want to travel
for 10 years or more and make sure that you keep on
travelling, you have to make sacrifices.
(04:00):
Obviously it's very difficult and you've obviously done that.
I just wondered whether what do you think it's necessary in
order to appreciate or understand travelling the way
that we're able to or the way that many people listening to
this will be able to? Do you think it's important to
have lots of experiences, both positive and negative, right at
opposite ends of the spectrum for to get that sort of overview
(04:20):
of what backpacking for a long time is really like?
I think life is holistic. It's full of things, isn't it?
Life is this crazy things where if you were just on a level all
the time, not experiencing the highs, not experiencing the
lows, I don't think you could look back on that existence and
be like that was fulfilling in any way.
One of the reasons why travel isso great and I love it so much
(04:42):
is because it evolves me as a person and you cannot be evolved
by positive experience. This event that happened to me
shaped me in a fundamental way, not because of what happened to
me during it or what was snowball to happen in the, in
the weeks post this event. Yeah, let me start from the top
and give you some context, OK? I've been travelling around the
continent of Africa, yeah, for our whole year.
(05:05):
And this story takes place on myvery, very last day on the
continent. So I mean you, you've already
said multiple times to me in private, but also you've said it
on the podcast. I mean, Africa, if we're ever
going to choose or or sort of a hierarchy of continents in terms
of what's easy to backpack and what isn't, Africa's about as
hard as it gets. So I would imagine isn't it?
(05:26):
Yeah, it's I I've spent a year on every continent travelling
now apart from Antarctica, so I can't speak to Antarctica, but
Africa is definitely the most challenging continent to travel.
In terms of infrastructure? Yeah, in terms of everything,
it's like it's not the most fun place all the time in the way
(05:46):
that South America is or North America is or Europe is, or
Australia. These are places which are
really dynamic and fun. You can find people and do
things all the time. Africa was hard.
I started in Israel and I travelled all over land.
I had to take a flight from Ethiopia down to Kenya so
because I couldn't get a visa. But the in general, I was just
(06:07):
taking trains and buses over land all the way from Israel all
the way down through to South Africa.
That took a long time. And I mean, I did some crazy,
crazy, beautiful things in that time.
I went on the safari, obviously saw the pyramids of Giza up at
the top, but inside the pyramidslike tour and a lot of
orphanages had amazing, amazing experiences.
(06:29):
But I was travelling with a partner for a lot of it.
If I wasn't, I would have been very, very alone indeed.
Like really not hostels available.
I was in guest houses. I was going on sometimes buses
and trains up to 72 hours, 55 hours long, long journeys.
It was hard. Yeah, and I know that one of the
things you like about backpacking is the culture and
(06:51):
meeting other backpackers. Not many backpackers doing a
similar thing. Certainly not in the towns and
places that I was seeking out and working.
I was trying at this point in mylife to experience a whole new
side of life and to see what youknow, I have an English language
degree. I was trying to teach.
I was trying to ingratiate myself in communities and like
learn about what it was to have community in that sense, see
(07:12):
what a difference I could make. We've talked about voluntarism a
lot in the podcast. There's episodes where I talk
about my opinion on teaching in Africa and how that's evolved
over time. It was an incredibly rewarding
experience. I'm glad I was there.
This was my last day in Africa, a continent that I had love
affair with, I thought was beautiful, I cared about very
much and I had a flight to New Zealand that evening.
(07:36):
Yeah, Yeah. What, what, what a time are you?
Are you thinking at this point that you've managed to get
through a year in Africa unscathed or, you know, I don't
know if you compartmentalize different experiences.
I hope overall it was positive. Yeah.
But was that anything that was going through your head because
you were in Joburg, which hasn'tgot the best reputation, fair to
say. Yeah, Joburg is where I finished
(07:58):
my African adventure by way of starting a road trip in Cape
Town and doing this route. It's called the Garden.
Route. Nicely drive all the way from
Cape Town, finishing Johannesburg.
I'd made two incredible friends,one of which is one of my best
friends to this day. He's friend of the show we've
talked about most times, Wagner,the Brazilian, We were together,
(08:20):
we had this amazing journey. And then Wagner and Ben, the
other friend I was doing the road trip with, left.
OK, so I was on my own for the first time in a very, very long
time. I'd been travelling with my
partner and then I was travelling with them.
It was a crazy, beautiful socialexperience.
And then suddenly I found myselfin Johannesburg, the most
dangerous city in the world. Many people would say yeah, and
(08:43):
I was on my own with one final day in Africa.
That's a funny headspace to be in.
Yeah, sure. I mean Joburg itself, if we've
got, if you're able to just describe it, because I've been
to lots of places that people say are very dangerous, maybe
places, places like even Manila where we're in now, we haven't
felt in danger one bit. And we've, we've been to some of
the the rough areas, Mexico City, he was somewhere I was
(09:05):
told was incredibly dangerous. OK, you've got to have your wits
about you, but you'll probably be fine.
Joburg, different story. Yeah, Joburg is renowned in the
backpacking world because there's like a street with some
hostels on some restaurants and the hostel.
I mean, I don't know how this has evolved now, but we're
talking 2017, OK? The hostel said to me, don't
(09:27):
leave the street, but stay in the hostel.
Go and get some food. Don't go out into Joburg, it's
not safe for you. Sure.
Yeah, yeah. Which is advice that in ordinary
circumstance I would have heeded.
Apart from the fact that I'd spent such a long time in the
continent, I knew that I was about to start a whole new life
(09:48):
in New Zealand and I wanted one last sort of taste and.
I've got through a year Africa, see what you can throw at me
and. I thought, you know, I don't
want to cower in this hostel forfear of the city around me.
I googled something which I was fond of then I'm still in fond
(10:09):
of to this day, a free walking tour.
My intention was I was going to leave the hostel.
There's a reason it's fucking free.
Yeah, go on. Yeah, I had.
I had a bag with me because it was my last day.
I I still don't fully understandwhat I was thinking, but I had a
bag with me that had more thingsin than I ever would normally
(10:30):
carry in. This bag had my passport, my
glasses, my bank cards, my money.
Pashanka might the original Pashanka.
Arrived it. Was like a day pack, but it had
a bunch of stuff in. I think because my intention was
to leave my clothes to the hospital, go out with this day
pack and do The Walking talk, come back quickly, grab my
clothes and go off to the airport.
(10:51):
Obviously I could have left my passport in my big bag.
Didn't do that. Yeah, what you've described is
basically a one stop shop for a thief.
Yeah, and I'd been travelling now in total for about 3 years,
so I thought I felt confident. I go to the site of this walking
tour and I'm there with my bag and I'm walking to the meeting
(11:13):
point thinking, oh it's going tobe great.
I'll do a free walking tour of Joburg and then finish.
I'm going to have such a relaxing day.
After that, I'll go to a cafe, go back to the hostel and get my
flight. Yeah, straightforward.
It's in this sort of busy area by a train station, and I
remember walking down the streetone time and like couldn't find
like look out for the person with the orange umbrella, find
(11:34):
the person with the. Orange.
Oh, that's an orangutan. Yeah, exactly.
And so I sort of double back. Yeah.
Where is the start of this walking tour now?
Something happens a lot when you're a Mizungu on the
continent of Africa. Mazungu means someone with white
skin. OK.
You attract a lot of attention wherever you go.
(11:56):
Less so in South Africa than therest of the continent.
I spent a lot of time in East Africa.
There you're like constantly, you're an object of people's
attention because you're, and often times for me, the only
white person that's ever visitedthat little place, right?
And, and it's like a small town or they've just never seen a
Mazungu before. Sure.
So you're kind of used to attracting attention.
(12:16):
I certainly was. Is that used as a like in a
derogatory way? Is it kind of a racial slur or
is it just the word for someone with white skin?
Yeah, no, it's actually like it's a, it's a very common term.
It's commonly used and it's not particularly offensive in any
way. Cool means someone with white
skin. It sounds cool.
It's not used in South Africa, that word.
It's just reusing the rest of the continent.
Oh, right, gotcha. So I'm walking down the street
(12:37):
and I felt someone sort of like put a hand on my shoulder.
OK, And my response wasn't one of anxiety as an I just kind of
went Oh no, you know, no, thank you.
Like sorry, I just carried. I've got I'm going to a tour
carried on walking. Oh yeah, he thought.
He's maybe just someone trying to get your attention to sell
something or or whatever. Yeah.
And then I carry on walking and with urgency, the steps continue
(12:59):
behind me. And then a more firm hand placed
on my shoulder. And that it sort of turns me
around and there's a guy there and he like has a bit of a stern
look on his face. Sure, yeah.
And I'm suddenly aware that my back is kind of against a fence.
I was walking along the street and there's, like, a fence on my
(13:20):
back. Yeah.
And this guy turns to me and looks me straight in the eye.
And initially I'm like, oh, get off me man, Stop.
Right. But then he looks at me like he
ain't stopping. I'm against this wall and I see
from across the road 5 other mencharging out of the building
(13:41):
towards me. Are they?
Clearly like the same group. This guy's got his hand on my
shoulder and against the wall, five guys running towards me.
I feel completely trapped. My initial reaction is to try
and shake him off, but I'm surrounded so quickly by 6
people, All of them I notice brandishing makeshift weapons.
(14:05):
I see a machete. I see a knife and worst of all,
the thing that I still can viscerally see in my mind's eye
to this day. One of them was holding a rusty
screwdriver so chills down my spine.
Let's go to a brief meditation break.
(14:26):
Sometimes when traveling, accidents happen.
Oh, I've fallen off a helicopterand broken my nose.
That's why it's always so important to have travel
insurance. And when you do need insurance,
we recommend Safety Wing. There's a link in the
description. Click it.
Support the podcast. Like an adrenal gland quick
firing through the mind of a trapped tourist, allow your
(14:50):
conscious mind to return to yourbrain.
As I'm pushed against a fence, surrounded by no less than six
people, The guy that initially stopped me, five others all
brandishing weapons. I see that screwdriver.
I think there is nothing I want less than that in my body.
Did you already at this point, you knew the score like you knew
(15:12):
exactly what was going on. There was there's no way these
guys were just chances that were, you know, testing your
whatever. Did did you think in that
moment, this is somewhere where the rules don't apply?
Because that's what scares the shit out of me is when you go to
countries where maybe the value of life is slightly different
and it doesn't. It doesn't matter if you're a
wealthy tourist or whatever. They simply don't care.
(15:34):
It's difficult to know what my initial reaction was.
My memory is that at first my adrenal glands fired and I was
like, what the hell, get off me,get off me.
And then you see the weaponry and suddenly you, like, shrink
into yourself. You're like, Oh my God.
I remember putting my hands up and being like, there's no way
(15:55):
out of this. Take, take everything.
Oh wow. Like because there's nothing you
can do. There's like no martial artist
in the world that can take on 6 people with weapons.
It's just impossible. And you didn't even think about
like speak. I mean, I don't know what's
going through your head. Obviously you're you're probably
shitting yourself, but there's no way of getting out of this
through like conversation or whatever.
You just, you just knew. I think I may be shouted.
(16:16):
Will anyone help me or somethinglike that?
Was it busy? Was it like exactly where you
were with a lots of people walking around?
I was. On a pretty busy St.
That's what's so fucking scary, yeah.
On a pretty busy St. in broad daylight.
But because the fence is againstmy back and there's so many of
them I'm like semi circled sure.So there's no way I can just
like run like I did when I was mugged in Bangalore.
Yeah. Did you feel like just before,
(16:38):
in the moments before, I don't know if you can think back to
this. Did you feel like you were being
looked at or watched or attracting attention in any way?
No. But in Insight now, I sort of do
think the reason why it happenedis because I doubled back,
right. I like, went down that street.
Maybe they noticed what the hell, there's a Mazungu like
walking down the street. And then I came back and they
were like, prepared for me. Sure, Yeah.
(17:00):
Yeah, you don't miss an opportunity twice.
Yeah, so God, So they're surrounding me.
The weapons are fucked. I mean, I don't know why I
would, yeah. I put my hands up.
They before the bag tore I was having a little day pack and
they cut the straps with the machete.
Off your back. Yeah, off my back, they grab it.
(17:22):
So that's the passport, the wallet, the bank cards, all my
cash. There's the my glasses are in
there, like £300 worth of glasses, everything just taken
off my back in a in a complete bag like that.
Do you even care though? Like, is it the the fear of
having something done to you with, you know, physical harm
that would be so great, like a machete or a screwdriver or
(17:45):
something like that? Are you thinking, Oh my God,
I've got so much in my bag, Please don't take that.
Or are you just thinking do whatever I need to do to not?
Get stabbed. I just didn't want that
screwdriver anywhere near me. But I was like angry.
I was like, how is this happening?
How are you doing this? Is no one going to say anything?
It's like no one. There was a woman I remember
actually to my right, she was selling stuff like she was sat
(18:08):
with a pot of something. I was like, this is crazy.
Will no one do anything? I mean, what she's supposed to
do, right? But I felt so blown away.
This was happening in the middleof the day.
Yeah, they took that. They obviously took my phone
from my pocket. They went through my pockets.
They just searched me and just took everything.
Right. Oh my God.
And then they run towards the place they came out of.
(18:30):
There's a building across the street and they all run.
One of them he like sets off running and then turns back,
looks at me and cracks me in theface, punches me.
He lands a punch flush so on thecheekbone of my of my eye going
into my nose. Jesus Christ.
And I remember like turning withit.
(18:53):
Yeah. And but a knowing immediately
they didn't hurt me as much as Ithought I was going to.
OK. Like he was wearing a ring and
it caught my nose so I was bleeding.
Jesus Christ. But I remember like, that's so
awful, like seeing that was about to happen and turning and,
and, and then being like, oh, thank God I'm not knocked out.
(19:13):
And my first thought was like, I'm conscious, I'm OK, I'm OK.
And I like come back up and he's, he's running off into the
building and they're all just, they're gone.
Yeah, well. And so I sit, then I'm like,
I've got nothing. I don't know how to get back to
my hostel. I don't know how to do anything
right. I've got no passport, no phone,
and I'm just like, taking a moment to realize what's just
(19:35):
happened because this all happens in a matter of 30
seconds, Yeah. Are you thankful, or you're just
not hurt, or you're just frustrated?
I'm so upset. Very.
Scared. I'm so frustrated and then I
start thinking about what's justhappened and I'm like what?
What happens now? Like I've not got a passport.
I've got, Oh my God, my flight to New Zealand.
I was supposed to go to New Zealand to get a job, to start a
new life, to like my next year of my life is going to be me
(19:58):
working in New Zealand. I can't do that anymore.
I've not got a passport. I can't.
What do I do? And then I started thinking,
I've not seen my family in threeyears.
And now I'm going to go to the embassy.
I'm going to get an emergency flight back to the only place
that you can without a passport,your home country, the UK.
I'm going to text my mom and say.
I'm, I'm sorry, like you have topick me up from the airport.
(20:19):
I've got no phone, no money, no passport.
I've had to take an emergency flight like.
It is a complete 180 swing, isn't it?
From what you were going to whatyou were thinking of doing is at
the absolute bottom end, from what you thought you were, where
you should be super excited to start a new life in New Zealand.
And then it's just the because in isolation, being mugged like
that is horrific. It's horrendous.
(20:41):
But for it to have had that impact as well on what you were
about to do, especially so close.
I was just in despair. I remember I like SAT and I was
like. You didn't even leave the
location. No, that is what what worse they
could do to me really. I I remember thinking about that
concept. That concept really stuck with
me in a way that I actually think was indicative of some
trauma that I've had to work outlater.
(21:03):
The thing that really stuck withme as the the non negotiable,
the awful thing was that I'd have to go home and admit to my
family that like, I, I was doingthis thing, this travel, I got
fucked up and now I like, I'm returning to you like a prodigal
son. That's like being damaged and is
(21:24):
fucked and like needs help and I'm going to have to be at my
this whole plan has just been shattered.
The whole rest of my life has been shattered.
Travel was everything to me at that point, unhealthily so, and
I just couldn't bear it. And so I did something which no
one should ever, ever do. It's the most stupid, stupid
thing that you can possibly do in this situation.
(21:46):
I got up and I went over to the house that they'd all run into
and I knocked on the door. Yeah, yeah.
I mean, well, I mean, you, you want to call me doing that And
I'm sure I, I don't even think this is one of those, oh, you
don't know what you would, how you would react in this
situation. I'm I'm absolutely 100% certain
I would not have gone over to that building.
And these are the actions of someone for whom travel was not
(22:07):
just something they were doing. It was all they knew how to do
at that point. And I was obsessed with it, and
it was all I could fathom doing.And it really, you know, it's
emotional to say this and it's tragic, but for me it was like
to stop me from travelling at that point was akin to killing
me. Like I couldn't hack not
travelling. So I knock on the door and one
(22:28):
of the guys, not the guy that punched me, one of the other
ones opens the door and looks atme like, kid, what the fuck are
you doing? I remember the look.
He was like, what? Is incredulous.
Can't believe the audacity. Are you serious?
Stupid to say. Yeah, Yeah.
And I said, please, just give memy passport back.
(22:52):
Yeah, I all like, you win, please can I have my passport?
And he stared at me like, what the fuck?
And he slammed the door. Yeah.
And I'm like, what the fuck? What do I do now?
Same. Same, horrible, horrible
feeling. And I just slumped on the
(23:14):
curbside right outside the door.Oh my God.
Like. Fuck this.
Everything, the weight of it allcrushing down on me.
I waited and I waited, and afterabout what probably felt like
longer was probably about two minutes, that guy opened the
door, spits on the ground, throws my passport and my
(23:34):
wallet. Oh, empty, but with my ID still
in there. Yeah, yeah.
Throws it down on the ground. Yeah, and.
And looks at me with what I think was maybe pity, maybe a
little bit of respect that like I had the stones to, to do that.
Yeah. I don't know.
(23:55):
It was a look that I've never seen before or since.
It was like a spectrum of human emotion that I've never quite
fully understood. The way he looked at me when he
did that, spit and threw those objects down to me.
Yeah, either this guy's stupid or he's desperate.
And then he slammed the door again.
Yeah. And that was it.
I stuffed the passport so deep down my underpants.
Yeah, I remember like so worriedI was going to get mugged again.
(24:18):
Oh yeah, that would have been, yeah.
So I like. Directly.
Actually I. Take the passport and I shoved
it like right down my pants and I just bolt off in the other
direction. Yeah, shit.
I mean, it's yeah, extraordinary, absolutely
extraordinary. Yeah, it was crazy.
So then obviously I how do I, how the fuck do I get home, like
back to the hostel? Because I've got no money, no
phone, no way of looking anything up.
(24:39):
Yeah, it didn't have like brief or some sort of way of
orientating yourself. No way, nothing to go.
I. Got an Uber to the place that I
was like I didn't know where thefuck I was.
I was so clueless. I found a police officer.
Yeah, and. I said I've just been robbed,
like I need help, like I'm fucked.
And he went like, if you're South African even, like where,
(25:01):
where are they these people? We can go and challenge them.
Go and get your stuff back. And I was like, they'll kill me
if I if I go back there with younow, like just give me a
password. I can't fathom doing that.
Did you trust the police at thispoint?
No, no, the police officer, there was two of them.
(25:22):
I I think that, I mean, I was bleeding out of my nose.
The way they spoke to me was like silly little boy, this
happens all the time. Do you want us to go and saw it?
It's going to be pretty fucking crazy if we do.
They had guns now. We can go in that building and
have a say, but your stuff is gone.
Like we can go and like confrontthem.
And I was like, I don't want to do that, but I just need to get
(25:46):
home. They're like rot kit in the back
of the squad car. So I was like, sorry, say that
again. Pretty good accent, I was
impressed. That's how I ended up in the
back of these guys. Police car.
Right. They start driving me through
Johannesburg in the general direction of my hostel.
But in the middle of the fuckingdrive, yeah, they get a phone
(26:07):
call and they have to veer off. They go right, We've got to deal
with these gang bangers. They turn right and then get out
of the car and fucking leave. I'm in the back seat of a
Johannesburg police squad car and they're going off dealing
with some gang bangers and I'm just there on the back seat like
(26:30):
Oh my fucking God, what the hell?
Yeah, talk about sitting duck. Fucking hell.
Yeah, I don't know. I in my mind's eye, I can hear
him. There was like gunshots going
off. Yeah.
I'm just waiting in the back of this car for 15 minutes. 15
minutes on your own in a police car?
Yeah. And I like slide, but I lie down
on the seat, like with my head down that holy fucking shit.
(26:50):
Holy fucking shit. What the hell?
Yeah. Like how have I just gone from
being mugged to now being in theback of a cop car dealing with
gang bangers? A gang banger.
Just Can you explain to me what that is?
It's. Just a gangster.
OK, right. Nothing, nothing kinky.
Yeah, it's not illegal to to be a gang.
It's not illegal to. Well, it is illegal to gangbang,
but not for the reasons you. So yeah, that's just what an
(27:14):
awful position to be in. So I would say maybe even a
downgrade being lit up like a Christmas tree saying come and
rob me, I'm in a police car, there's no one here because, I
mean, even the car could have got jacked, couldn't it?
Or something at the least. It was mental.
They got back in efforts a few minutes.
They were like, you see how muchwe have to deal with in the
city. You have held that.
They were annoyed at me for likekeeping them from their job.
(27:34):
They're like, oh, I will take you to your fucking hostel.
They started driving. They got another call.
They got a call saying you've got to go and deal with some
more gang bangers. Yeah.
The guy in the passenger seat turns to me and get out the
fucking car. You're taking too long.
We can't take you to the hostel.Get out the fucking car.
Wow. They kicked me out of the police
car in the middle of fucking nowhere.
(27:55):
Oh my. God, I mean, yeah, I've, I've
heard the story in little bits. I didn't realize that this has
happened either. Give me a fucking break.
Totally. I'm walking around with my
passport between my ass cheeks in my underpants just desperate
to like. I find a hotel.
I go in and I say like hey guys I'm so fucked can someone just
(28:19):
help me for free because I have no money, no phone no anything.
Can someone drive me to my hotel?
Even the police won't help me. Even the police won't help me
because they've got what to do with the gang bangers.
Wow. So eventually one of the
concierges from the hotel drove me to the hostel.
We get there and he's like, pay me.
(28:40):
Oh, brilliant. I'm like.
No, no, no, no, no, no. I got so angry really, because I
was so done at this point. I said, what did you fucking say
I Ted to you that I've been mugged and need this right away?
Can someone just fucking help mein this fucking city?
Can someone give me a break? I think he was so like, he's got
(29:00):
this kid bleeding with a passport down his pants,
shouting at him in his car. He was just like, OK, yeah, go
out. Just go out.
Just go. Oh man, so I mean, there's more
to the story in the sense that then like I, I had to go to the
police station to try and try and get insurance.
Insurance eventually didn't pay out because it turns out I
(29:21):
wasn't using safety wing where you can buy insurance, you know,
after when you're in, when you're travelling.
I've got insurance when I wasn'tin my home country and validated
it. That's why you should always use
safety wing or similar. Link in the description.
Oh. My goodness.
So you know, eventually I got onon my flight and and got to New
Zealand. But my God, what a horrible,
(29:41):
horrible, brutal experience thatall was.
Yeah, it's absolutely shocking. I remember you saying actually
that when you spoke to the police, they said that they very
rarely if ever see something like this happen and mugging of
a tourist and the person isn't at least stabbed.
They said it's some is Zimbabwean gangs.
What did that to you? Yeah, he was Australian.
(30:06):
He said, I'll hate that I've been given this transfer to say
everything. Well, it seems to be a cop in
Sydney and now, no, he said it'svery unusual.
It's very unusual for you to have got out of that situation
with no wounds. I said look at the fucking state
of my nose. He went, that's not a wound.
Yeah. And what I think for me, how I
feel when you're telling me thatstory is a what an amazing South
(30:28):
African accent. Yeah, but B, in that moment when
if I think I was being pinned upor being mugged and and a couple
of things in that kind of realm of happened to be absolutely
nowhere near as scary or severe or dangerous as that.
But even even you telling me that story, I think I would
still be thinking, OK, they've got weapons, they've got a
machete, they've got horrible rusty screwdriver.
(30:50):
They're probably not going to use it.
But that is that's not true, butthey absolutely will use it.
The same rules do not apply justbecause you wouldn't do that in
the UK or in, you know, any other country where things are
slightly different is different value.
You know, they value life slightly differently.
Them stabbing you is the same asthem going to.
(31:10):
The shop same number of consequences yeah, I'll say
this. South Africa, one of my
favourite countries in the world.
I actually had an amazing time there.
This was just my last day without that last day, one of my
favourite countries ever. But I'll say this against it
back then, don't know if it's changed now.
The consequences for them not stabbing me were the same as the
consequences for them stabbing me.
(31:31):
And in both scenarios that was 0.
Yeah, nothing happens. They just had my shit, so it was
crazy. There's some more stuff to that
story that maybe I'll tell in the Patreon section.
We got patreon.com/tripology podcast.
This is the last week where you can sign up to our Patreon and
get a coupon code for the original artwork T-shirt that
were this exclusive for just ourPatreon audience.
(31:53):
It's a good time to sign up. We also have an exclusive
Discord. You get episodes 24 hours early
in the $2.00 tier. There's like amazing stuff over
there. You should definitely sign up.
Next week is going to be a very,very special week for Tripology.
We're going to launch a whole new format.
It's going to be bigger, better.We're striving to be the number
one travel podcast in the world by the end of the year.
(32:14):
So tell your friends, hey, next week, let's all gather together.
Let's listen to Tripology podcast.
It's going to be the start of a new era.
Thank you. Thank you for being one of the
Ogs, one of the people listeningright now before we start this
incredible, incredible journey. That was my greatest travel
story. I would love to hear yours.
Trilogy podcast.com/tales of theTrip record, your best travel
(32:36):
story. We'll play them going on from
next week. Yeah, thanks ever so much for
your support. It's amazing.
We can't wait. It's a really exciting time for
us both. Exciting time for the show,
exciting time for the listeners.Sign up to Patreon.
Get one of these T-shirts. I I usually wear it every week.
If you've not seen it before, have a little look at the video.
I can't wait to hear what else is going on in the Patreon
section mate, it's gripping stuff.
Stay tuned and we'll see you on the next one.
(32:57):
We'll see you there. Bye bye.
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