Ghosted, Grown & Slightly Unbothered

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 2 (00:10):
welcome back to twin tangents, where every episode
starts with a plan and ends in aplot twist and this week we're
kicking off a brand new themefreedom, independence and
expression, because sometimesthe boldest form of freedom is
choosing who gets access to you.

Speaker 1 (00:26):
From childhood besties to we used to be close
co-workers.
We're talking about howfriendship evolves or fades as
you grow.

Speaker 2 (00:36):
Some friendships stand the test of time, others
quietly lose their place in yourstory, and today we're
unpacking both.

Speaker 1 (00:43):
It's vulnerable, a little spicy and totally normal
to feel some type of way aboutthe people you've left behind.

Speaker 2 (00:50):
Because outgrowing people doesn't mean you're cruel
, it means you're healing.
Let's get into it.

Speaker 1 (00:58):
You ever scroll through your old photos and
realize half of the people inthem aren't even in your life
anymore.

Speaker 2 (01:03):
Old photos and realize half of the people in
them aren't even in your lifeanymore.
Yeah same, Whether it's thatbestie from high school, your
ride or die from college, orwe're basically sisters,
co-worker, some friendships justdon't make the cut.

Speaker 1 (01:16):
But here's a plot twist.
That's not always a bad thing.

Speaker 2 (01:19):
Today we're talking about what happens when
friendships shift, fade or,straight up, fall apart as we
grow, why it hurts and why it'snormal.

Speaker 1 (01:29):
And why you don't owe anyone a lifetime subscription
to your energy.

Speaker 2 (01:34):
All right, so let's start out by talking about
childhood friendships.

Speaker 1 (01:38):
Anthony, what's the biggest childhood betrayal that
still haunts you today?

Speaker 2 (01:42):
A childhood friendship betrayal that still
haunts me till this day.
I honestly don't know that Ihave any.
The only thing that I wouldthink of is, I'm sure and it's
probably something that I didn'treally care about and I still
don't, if I don't remember butlike I'm sure there were times
when, like as a child you know,we'd come back from summer break

(02:03):
and it was just like okay, weused to be friends and now we're
just we different now.
We're different now.
Okay, what about?

Speaker 1 (02:09):
you I don't think I have any either, not that I know
of Like yeah, I don't, I don'tthink I have any.
I would say, like if anybodywho was like in my childhood or
whatever, like I guess I don'tknow the best way to say it was

(02:29):
that like me, growing up Iactually went to like a lot of
like white schools, if thatmakes sense like there wasn't a
lot of diversity because myparents, like for me, you know,
I'm the younger, I'm like theyoungest daughter in our family,
so then I didn't really get togo to school together with my
other siblings and we have a bigfamily.

(02:51):
So, being that, I was like moreof the younger one.
When my dad moved us out toBlaine in Minnesota, which is
kind of like a white town, atthat time there was only a few
like Asian families or likediverse, like black people and
stuff like that.
And so then like when we, whenI was in middle school,

(03:13):
elementary middle school andhigh school, like there were
other Asian kids that we hungout with, but like they were
already kind of, they alreadyhad a bond, they, they already
knew each other.
But when I came into the story,like I was kind of like the new
person and I was kind of aweirdo, so I guess I don't blame
them.
But then, like I thinkthroughout the years I low key

(03:35):
was kind of segregated from thembecause either one maybe it
might've been in my head where Ithought that they thought they
were too cool for me.

Speaker 2 (03:44):
How old were you at this time?

Speaker 1 (03:45):
Well, it happened throughout, like elementary,
middle and high school, butthey're all the same kids.

Speaker 2 (03:51):
It's the same kind of experience, yeah.

Speaker 1 (03:53):
Well as you were saying that.

Speaker 2 (03:54):
All I kept thinking was this is literally the
storyline of Mean Girls.

Speaker 1 (03:59):
Kind of yeah, I'm Katie Heron, you're Katie Heron.

Speaker 2 (04:03):
And that's just what I mean of.
Yeah, I'm katie heron andthat's just what I mean.
I feel like that's what schoolis, especially when you're
changing school systems.
Yeah, kids are so clicky.

Speaker 1 (04:10):
Yeah, because at the at that time, like I was kind of
a pudgy, I was a pudgy kid,like I was chubby and like all
these other kids were skinny andyou know, and it that in itself
already makes you again it's,it's in your head, I'm sure it's
in your head, but it makes youfeel like, oh, like they're
judging me because I'm fat orwhatever, and so then I it's not

(04:32):
really a bit like a betrayal,but I think it's just something
that kind of always plays in theback of my head.
Like, obviously, you know, ifany of you guys are listening to
the podcast, I have no hatetowards you or whatever.
I'm just saying that I feltlike that was the case where,
like, like, for example, likethey would hang out after school

(04:54):
and stuff, but I've nevergotten an invite.

Speaker 2 (04:57):
You know what I mean and these were people that you
were friends with, like kidsthat you were friends with it
wasn't like it wasn't so muchfriends with, but we were kind
of friends, I guess, but notreally.

Speaker 1 (05:08):
But then I don't really know how to describe it.
I just know that, like you know, for example, like the kids
that we hung out together, theywere all asian kids.
So then, like you know, everyasian kid knew every asian kid
because it was a white school.
So then you know you know whatI mean, yeah, and it wasn't
really clicky, but at the sametime it kind of was, you know.

(05:29):
So then I didn't like I waskind of in between where, like I
hung out with the Asian people,but I didn't, because I also
had white friends and blackfriends and stuff like that.
So like it's nothing too crazy,it's not like, oh my god, like
you're picking, you're sittingwith them, kind of a thing.
It's not like that, but it'sjust kind of like.

(05:50):
Again, it might be in my head,but I just felt like they didn't
really either one didn't reallylike me, maybe it was weird or
whatever, but then like theynever really invited me to
anything.
So to me I was just kind oflike, oh, they probably don't
really like me or they probablydon't really like.
And also, everybody datedeverybody in high school.
So I'm the type of person where, like, I don't date anybody

(06:11):
that goes to school with me,because, one, I'd have to see
him every day and, two, if webreak up, I'm going to have to
see him every day.
That's fair.
Yeah, so I wouldn't say it's abetrayal.

Speaker 2 (06:25):
Again, maybe say it's a betrayal again.
Maybe it's in my head, but well, I think the problem with that
question is because, afterhearing you speak, like I'm the
same way.
But I think the problem is thatword betrayal like when we're
talking about childhoodfriendships, looking back like
betrayal to me is something alittle bit more excessive.
Okay, and I can't imagine aquote unquote betrayal as a

(06:45):
child in a childhood friendship.
Yeah, but like I experiencedthe same thing as you did, like
when I moved to Wisconsin, likeI moved from New Mexico and when
I moved to Wisconsin I thinkthere was only one mixed family
in the town that I lived in.

Speaker 1 (07:04):
That's crazy.

Speaker 2 (07:05):
But I remember when, when I moved, I got a lot of
hate and I like I wasn't verywelcomed into the community I
guess that's a good way ofsaying it like feeling welcomed.

Speaker 1 (07:15):
Yeah, I think that's just.
Again, it's not betrayal, it'sjust how I felt.
But yeah, I definitely didn'tfeel welcome into like the Hmong
community.

Speaker 2 (07:23):
That was already like there, there, because they had
already established theirfoundation of friendship.
Yeah, they probably went toschool together, since they were
yeah, and babies.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (07:34):
And again, I was a pudgy, chubby kid and I looked
kind of weird.
I was kind of weird, I willadmit that, and at that time Was
.

Speaker 2 (07:43):
Why are you saying it past tense?
I?

Speaker 1 (07:45):
guess, but yeah, that's pretty much it.

Speaker 2 (07:53):
Yeah, what about from your childhood?
Was there anything that likereally like scarred you or
anything that kind of changedyour view towards establishing
friendships?
Like, did you have any badexperiences on the playground?

Speaker 1 (08:08):
No, not really.
I used to like I don't know ifI like got bullied or whatever,
but it was more of like a flirtything.
There was this kid in highschool, or not high school, in
elementary school, which is kindof weird Low-key he'skey.
He's passed away now.

Speaker 2 (08:26):
That's sad.

Speaker 1 (08:27):
Yeah, and he's actually brother to one of my
other friends.
She's also passed away.
Yeah, it's crazy, that story iscrazy.
But anyways, we went toelementary school together and
he would throw his shoe at me,but I think it was because it
was kind of like it's like a kidthing where, like, you have

(08:49):
cooties, but then, like I thinkit's kind of like a flirty thing
.
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (08:52):
That was always the playground thing was like.
When you're bullying or pickingon somebody was because you had
a crush on.

Speaker 1 (08:58):
Yeah, and so then he'd always like throw his shoe
at me or like chase me aroundand stuff like that.
And then when we moved, likeobviously I didn't know what
happened cause I didn't reallycare and then in high school, me
and his sister we were we metagain.
Well, we went with him, we didgo to school with him in middle

(09:18):
school Like it was elementary,from what I remember and then
they kind of disappeared alittle bit.
And then in middle school theyended up moving into the same
area that we were.
So we did go to school for likeI think one year in middle
school and then they disappearedagain.
And then in high school I methis sister at a school program

(09:40):
and then we we were kind ofclose and I found out that she
was actually his brother or shewas actually his sister, and so
then, but it wasn't anythinglike oh, so when you met her,
you didn't know that she was hissister.
Well, I did.
But then, like it wasn'tanything like.
I was like, oh, like, oh, myGod, it's her, his brother, his

(10:01):
sister or whatever.
But I was like, oh, oh, they'reprobably related or something,
because I didn't know he had ayounger sister, so I guess, yeah
, I they looked alike.
I kind of had my assumptions.
But then I was like, when Ifound out, I'm like, oh, so
you're so-and-so's brother orsister, and she was like, oh
yeah so where did they go thatthey just like I think they just

(10:22):
moved to like or they just wentto different schools, cause you
know like sometimes the samelike district they have like
multiple schools.
So maybe they went to adifferent school and the
district and then and causewhere I lived.

Speaker 2 (10:36):
I'm not familiar with that Cause I've always lived in
like small towns.

Speaker 1 (10:39):
Okay.
Like one school like where Ilived, let an LM, or like the
elementary school that I went to, because when we moved out of
town I was in fourth grade, sothat's still considered like
elementary.
And then fifth, sixth andseventh Wait, sixth, seventh and
eighth was middle school.
So one through five waselementary, six to eight was

(11:00):
middle, and then obviouslyfreshman to senior is high
school.
So then I came in fourth gradealmost at the end of the year
already.
So again, I didn't have anyfriends, I didn't really you
moved mid school year yeah ohyeah.
So then the following year,like in fifth grade, like I kind

(11:21):
of had friends, we kind of knewof each other, but at that time
we still have like a homeroom.
So you know, like when homeroomyou don't like really switch
classes or whatever, except forlike choir and stuff like that.
So then at that time I alsodidn't really get to meet like
other kids.
So whoever I was with I was, Iwas friends with them, and so
then when we went to middleschool that's when all of the

(11:43):
other kids from otherelementaries they come together.
So we only had one middleschool in that district.
So then that's when I met theother Asian kids and so then
from there again they have theirown friendship, they've been
established.
So I was kind of like left outand so then that kind of carried
on into high school and then inhigh school like I was able to

(12:07):
finally like go to school with,because when I was in middle
school, like I have anotherolder sibling, my last.
She's older than me but she'stwo years older, so she's two
grades above me.
So it's like we play catch upin school.
So like when I was inelementary they went to like
middle school already, or highschool, and then when, when I
hit middle school, then she'd bealready in eighth grade, and

(12:30):
then when I'm in freshman shewas already a junior senior.
So then I was like sheestablished friends because
obviously she's a little olderat that time, so they had
friends.
But when I went into high schoolthat's when you meet the, the
older kids, or like people, theadult kids, and again like they
were siblings to the, the kidsthat were in my grade too, so

(12:53):
they all kind of knew each other, but then at that time, like my
sister, they've alsoestablished their own
friendships.
And then I also was involved inlike different things, like I
love theater, I did like a mocktrial I was yeah yeah, same.

Speaker 2 (13:09):
Yeah, I loved my look at us.

Speaker 1 (13:11):
We're like the same person right, yeah, I was only
yeah, I was in it for a littlebit only, though, because I
think I got a little toopassionate and I'm like I don't
think I could do this, and andalso because I was kind of
stupid, so I would be likedefending no, I was dumb, I was
defending the wrong thing wereyou the attorney it would be, we

(13:32):
would switch it on and off.
So we would be like are you onthe defense, are you on the
offense or are you the attorney?
Like kind of back and forth.
But then I think, like ourfirst thing we talked about was
like if somebody was to stealsomething and let's say, if they
were to steal it for a siblingor like a parent, because they
didn't have that or their parentcould provide that, who would I

(13:53):
fight for?
And then how the the lady didit was.
She would then divide us intothe groups of same like values
or like the same answer, andthen we would like argue against
each other.
And so then I think I got alittle too passionate, because I
swear to god, I think I likeswore, and the teacher was like
you can't do that, we're justdiscussing.

(14:14):
And I'm like, well, this islike a serious matter, okay, but
I was a little dramatic too,too.
But yeah, I'm jealous why?

Speaker 2 (14:25):
Well, when I was in mock trial, our coach or
whatever, he always made me likethe star witness.

Speaker 1 (14:31):
Oh really.

Speaker 2 (14:32):
Like I could never be one of the attorneys, oh.
And I was so bitter about thatBecause it's like after and I
actually just found my an awardthat I got in high school a
couple weeks ago Cute and Idon't remember this, but
apparently I was in mock trialall four years of high school.

Speaker 1 (14:47):
Wow, that's crazy.

Speaker 2 (14:48):
But yeah, so four years, and I remember like it
was probably year two or three.
No, it had to have been three.
But I was like I want to belike the attorney, I want to be
the lawyer, okay.
And he was like no, you're justtoo good of a witness.

Speaker 1 (15:03):
Yeah, maybe you have a good like a good attitude.
Here's what he told me.

Speaker 2 (15:08):
He told me that I was very good at playing innocent.
I see that.

Speaker 1 (15:13):
Now that I'm older.

Speaker 2 (15:14):
I'm like that was kind of an insult.

Speaker 1 (15:17):
I see that You'll always be playing victim over
there.
Look at you.

Speaker 2 (15:22):
I feel so targeted right now.
Yeah, I don't targeted rightnow.

Speaker 1 (15:26):
Yeah, I don't even know what we're talking about.
What were?
We talking about.

Speaker 2 (15:31):
Well, I think my question was is like was there
anything early on?

Speaker 1 (15:34):
in your childhood.
What about you?
Oh?

Speaker 2 (15:48):
I don't know if it would be like a scar or anything
, but I remember no, it wouldkind of be a scar Like I think,
when I first moved to Wisconsin,like, like I told you, the town
that I moved to only had onemixed race family.
Yeah, and I literally movedfrom New Mexico and I'm going to
use these were the words of myone of my science teachers.

(16:09):
I literally moved to a placewhere it was all blonde hair,
blue eyed people, Damn, and soit was very made, it was made
very well apparent that I wasnever going to like fit into
this.

Speaker 1 (16:24):
Your science teacher said that to you you well, he
said it to my grandma.
There was one time we had likea parent teacher you mean it as
like a good way or a bad way?

Speaker 2 (16:33):
I think a bad way, because that sounds kind of
racist.
Well, I think it low-key was,because I think it was.
I think we had a parentconference and I think my
grandma was talking to him about.
You know, I was bullied a lotin high school and it wasn't
very welcoming.
I rode the bus when I firstmoved to town.

(16:55):
I rode the bus to school onetime Never again, really and I
moved here in fifth grade.
Rode the bus one time, neveragain.
My grandma drove me to schooland picked me up from school
every single day until I got mylicense and could drive myself.
Damn.
But I rode the school bus thatone time and I remember I was

(17:18):
called the N-word, I was told togo back to where I came from
and it just wasn't a verywelcoming situation.
But anyway, getting back to theparent teacher conference, I
think that with the wholebullying and everything, I think
I don't remember exactly whatshe was talking to him about,
but I so vividly remember himstopping her, interrupting her
and telling her to look around.

(17:39):
All you see are blonde hair,blue eyes, what the fuck.
And so I was never going to be,I was never going to fit in.

Speaker 1 (17:48):
Oh hell, no, yeah, that's fucked up.
For a teacher to see that, yeah, what the fuck.

Speaker 2 (17:55):
I don't look back on my, like your childhood.
No, I look back on my childhood.
My childhood was great, okay,but like my middle school and
high school experience, I wouldnever go back.
I would never.
Kids are so mean, they're somean, they're so cruel.
Yeah.
Bullied.
I remember I got sent to theprincipal's office.
One time A girl pulled my pantsdown in high school, oh my God.

(18:18):
Or middle school, oh my God,anthony.
And I got sent to the office.

Speaker 1 (18:21):
Oh my God, it was just so fucked up.
That's so fucked up.
I would have been fuckingpissed.

Speaker 2 (18:27):
That would probably be my scars from childhood and
school Okay.

Speaker 1 (18:35):
Now that you bring that up, we'll scratch what I
said in the beginning.
But I also my parents, I rodethe bus my whole childhood, high
school, whatever but like myfirst scarring of like actual
facing racism was like it waslike in high school.
So the kids in our neighborhoodlike they're much younger than

(18:57):
us, but then when I think, whenthey're like maybe a grade or
two younger than us, and there'sthis I remember particularly,
like I think I was a junior andhe was like a freshman and I was
talking on the phone with mymom and you know like there's a
usual ching chong ching, likeracist shit, you know.

(19:18):
So I was talking on my phone,talking on the phone with my mom
, or maybe I was talking to B, Idon't remember, but I was
talking on the phone.
I was talking to B, I don'tremember, but I was talking on
the phone.
I was speaking in Hmong and assoon as I hung up he started
saying go back to your countrybecause we don't speak.
No, ching Chong, ching ChongLing Long.
And I'm like, well, you couldshut the fuck up, because this
is a free country and I'm hereand I'm a US citizen.
So, or I'm a, I'm a what did Isay?

(19:40):
I was born in the US, so youcan shut the fuck up.
And then they were all like,ooh, like everybody was saying
that on the bus and like youguys are all like allowing this
to happen, so you guys could allshut the fuck up, yeah.
And so then, like after I gotoff the bus, like I gave him the
middle finger and I said you'rea fucking stupid idiot and your
mom and your dad don't know anyfucking like respect for this

(20:02):
country, because they obviouslydidn't teach you anything.
And then, like I think two daysafter that, he stole my
brother's basketball and clearlymy brother wrote his name on it
, right.

Speaker 2 (20:14):
And so then I'm like that was the thing to do yeah,
and I'm like.

Speaker 1 (20:17):
and so my brother?
He was like who the fuck stolemy basketball?
And then I was like I knowexactly who it is and I know
whose house it is.
Do you want to go get it?
And so we walked on over to thehouse and knocked on their door
and I'm like this is my chanceto get back at this little
racist shithead.
How old are you at this point?
I was a sophomore or junior inhigh school.

Speaker 2 (20:37):
Okay, so you're a little bit older.

Speaker 1 (20:38):
Yeah, and at that time like I didn't really care,
kind of like now, like I don'treally care about what people
think about me, it's whatever.
But yeah, and so then we wentto his house and then my brother
was like, oh, he was politebecause obviously he's much
older, so he didn't want tobring any issues or whatever.
So he was like, oh, like I'mmissing a basketball and it has

(21:02):
my name on it, and think yourson took it.
And this fucking racist bitchwas like, no, he did not.
Like we buy all his shit forhim, blah, or we buy all his
stuff for him, there's no way hestole it, come rolling the
fucking ball down the fuckingdriveway.
And my brother was like, oh,there's my basketball, and you
know why it's my basketball?
Because my name's on it.

(21:22):
And then she goes and says I'mso sorry, like I didn't know
that he took it yeah and then mybrother's like no, we know, he
took it.
My sister saw him take it and Iwas like I was there and I was
like yeah, I saw him take itfrom our yard because he was
walking home from the bus.
And he took it and I saw it andI was just looking at it and
I'm like I fucking see you, youlittle piece of shit.

(21:44):
But I didn't say that to him.
But then, like when we walkedhome, I was so proud yeah, when
I walked home I was so proud andI'm like, see, told you he
stole your basketball, but thatwas my proudest moment.
But whatever, like I don'tstand down for racism, I don't
stand down for that shit.
But I don't know I guess that'smy scar in high school, like
after it kind of fucked me up alittle bit, but I still stood my

(22:06):
ground.
I'm like I don't give a fuck.
My mom and my dad came to thiscountry for freedom.
Good for you, yeah.

Speaker 2 (22:13):
I don't think that I ever had it in me to like stand
up for myself in middle schooland high school, Because it
always seemed like, like,looking back on it, I can kind
of see some of the intentionsfrom the administration, but I
remember being, you know, introuble all the time.
I shouldn't say in trouble butlike I was, I played the victim

(22:36):
in mock trial, but I was alwayslike.
I was always the one in thewrong.
Yeah, I was like.

Speaker 1 (22:43):
Aww, maybe that's why you were such a good victim,
because you're like now's mytime to shine, bitches.

Speaker 3 (22:48):
Now's my time to shine, because I am the victim.
I'm used to it.
I'm so fucking used to it Forme.

Speaker 1 (22:53):
I think, from that moment, though, the only reason
why I was able to stand up formyself is because, prior years
to that, my sister, linda, andshe experienced something racist
at the school, and she told meabout it.
So that's when I was like, ohyeah, I'm gonna stand up for
myself too, because they, youknow, like in high school, for
the senior picture, like peoplecould wear t-shirts and stuff

(23:14):
like that, or like they're intheir uniform or whatever.
So they had this, they all theAsian people.
They had this t-shirt that saysgot rice or something like that
, or something asian, I don'tremember, but they they were.
The photographer allowed them tosit on the front row, because
there was a lot of them, butthen the cheerleaders, they
wanted to be in the front row,but then, yeah, and then the

(23:37):
teacher was like thephotographer was like no, like,
you guys are already lined up,like we already lined everybody
up.
So they made it a big issue.
And so then the teacher, whowas involved in the yearbook
stuff, she didn't allow that.
She was just like no, likewe're not gonna do that.
Yeah, you guys, we're alreadylined up.
The photographer needs to takea photo, because we gotta go,
because you know, like when it'spicture time they don't.
So they're like let's go, let'sgo, let's go.

(23:59):
So the teacher was on, theteacher was on board with them,
but then with the mung, yeah,with the asian people, but then
they, the, the cheerleaders,they made it a big deal.
So they I think they saidsomething to the principal, but
then my sister was like no, likeit's done and over with, like
we already did it and we wereallowed that spot.
We didn't choose it.

(24:19):
They wanted us in the front,like photographer wanted us in
the front, and so then I guessthat whole time they were like
complaining when they weretaking the photos, like people
were complaining about thembeing in the front and shit, but
they were just like okay, andyou're gonna keep crying about
it, what are you gonna do aboutit?

Speaker 2 (24:32):
yeah, could you be any pettier?
Like it's a high schoolyearbook photo.

Speaker 1 (24:37):
Like yeah, come on so then, when she told me that I'm
like, yeah, like you are right,like to be, they're like you
are right, like you know, wehave every right to be in the
front here as much as you guysdo.
So shut the fuck up and keepcrying about it.
Sit down yeah, smile and getyour damn picture taken exactly

(24:57):
end of story yeah, so that'swhere my, my toughness rooted
from.

Speaker 2 (25:05):
I got a funny this is kind of random, but I got a
funny kind of funny racist storyfor you okay so after I moved
here?
this is probably no, it wasprobably a while.
So I was in middle schoolbecause I was friends.
I ran into one of my bestfriends at Walmart.
I was at Walmart with mygrandma and I ran into one of my
best friends at Walmart.
I was at Walmart with mygrandma and I ran into her and

(25:27):
her sister and they were lookingfor their parents and I'll
never forget this.
We were probably in either thetoothpaste or like the deodorant
aisle Okay, it was probablytoothpaste and we were talking
and some little old woman cameup to me and like, put her arm

(25:49):
on my or her hand on my forearmand she goes I think your
friends are in the next aisleover.
And I look at my friendMichelle and she looks at me and
we're like what?
And so this little old lady,she went on her way and so we
went and we went around thecorner to look in the next aisle
.
It was a group of three blackkids.

Speaker 1 (26:12):
What a dumb bitch.

Speaker 2 (26:14):
I'm like, who does that?
I'm just going to walk up tosome random person I don't even
know In the middle of aconversation and be like your
friends are in the next aisleover.

Speaker 1 (26:22):
What a dumb bitch.
I couldn't believe that, like Idon't care how old you are, I
don't care how like, how,whatever, like how proper you
are, but racism, no bitch, getthe fuck out of here, right?
I would have been like oh, oh,lady, you forgot your cane over
there actually I had a reallybad comment.

Speaker 2 (26:43):
oh, did you?
Yeah, I said to Michelle.
I was like I should have told Ishould have went back and found
her and I should have saidexcuse me, ma'am, I think your
friends are in the graveyarddown the road.

Speaker 1 (26:53):
Period.
I would have said that I don'tgive a fuck.

Speaker 2 (26:57):
No, I don't want to stoop to that level, but it it's
little moments like that thatI'm just like no.
Seriously.

Speaker 1 (27:04):
No, my thing is say it when you can.

Speaker 2 (27:08):
Yeah, so I wish I would have been like on my feet
and like, yeah, I'm pretty witty.

Speaker 1 (27:13):
I think a lot of people hates me because, like
I'm pretty like.

Speaker 2 (27:16):
You always have a comeback.

Speaker 1 (27:17):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (27:18):
I think I feel like I normally have a comeback now.

Speaker 1 (27:21):
Sometimes I do have a comeback Like have a comeback
now.
Sometimes I do have a comebackLike my comebacks are a little
deep.
I know I could get a littledeep Like but don't come for me
if you can't handle it Exactly,yeah, Like bitch, I'm not
cutting to hurt you, I'm cuttingto kill.
Period.
I would've tripped her Justsaying Did you have a nice?

Speaker 2 (27:39):
fall bitch.

Speaker 1 (27:40):
Yeah, I would've tripped her and said do you have
life alert?
But how you falling?
I want to say that in front ofher you're falling and you can't
get up.
Well, I mean, I'm not that mean, but if somebody was to say
some racist shit to me, oh yeah,you fucking bet your ass I will
.
I will come back fighting, butyeah, I'm all fired up for

(28:02):
nothing.
Well, it's child trauma babychild trauma.

Speaker 2 (28:07):
All right, did you ever feel like you were replaced
as someone's best friend?
Like if so, like what did you?
What did you do or what didthat do to your sense of loyalty
?

Speaker 1 (28:18):
I wouldn't really say that I've ever felt replaced or
maybe I don don't know.
Maybe you could judge in thissituation.
So I had a best friend, or Ihad a close friend, and this is
like junior senior year we wentthrough an EMT program.
You went through an EMT program?

(28:39):
Yeah, I did.
I was certified as an EMT forlike a little bit, but I got
married and all that shit wentto dumpster fire.
But yeah, I was in the ENTclass, I loved it, but I think
at that time my brain was toolittle to like process yeah.
So then I just kind of likepulled shit out of my ass most

(28:59):
of the time, but anyways.
So we had a group of friendsthere was I think four of us,
but I was particularly close totwo of these girls and then I
guess there was this momentwhere, like the guy that I was
dating at that time, he was kindof like a bad boy or whatever.

Speaker 2 (29:20):
Why do you say it like that?

Speaker 1 (29:21):
Because he kind of was.
Nobody liked him because he wasa red flag.

Speaker 2 (29:26):
Nobody liked him, but me.

Speaker 1 (29:29):
I don't know what happened, but at that time one
of the girls I was a little bitcloser to her because we both
had boyfriends and she woulddrive us to the cities and we
would go meet up with them, orshe would drop me off at my
boyfriend at that time's houseand we would go hang out and
stuff.
So maybe, maybe she felt likethat too towards me.

(29:50):
But then like I don't know howto explain the situation, I just
know that like what happenedwas because this is my senior
year, we graduated and then wekind of kept in touch through
the summer and then, of course,my dumb ass, I got married and
then I still of kept in touchthrough the summer and then, of
course, my dumb ass, I gotmarried and then I still reached
out to her, but she just neverstarted, she just never

(30:11):
responded to me.
And so then, you know, withsocial media and stuff, I found
out that she became really closewith this other girl and then
they like they were friends.
I think they remained reallygood friends and stuff like that
.
And so then I was kind of sadbecause I was like, oh, like you
know, we were close, but nowlike, obviously you are close

(30:32):
with this other girl.
But it's fine, you do you?
Like I'm not gonna make it abig deal or whatever, because at
that time I had my own crisisto figure, to figure out with
you know, like I had to figureout my own shit too.
And so then come to the timewhere I came back to live with
my mom and them, I had reachedout to her and I just said hey,
like you know, I hope you'redoing well.
You know, I hope that, like,whatever happened in the past or

(30:57):
if I did anything wrong to you,like I hope that you would
forgive me.
I don't know what I did, but atleast I hope you know that I'm
wishing you well.
She never responded, so then Ijust kind of like kept that
relationship as it was was thaton like messenger or?
yeah, I messaged her onmessenger because obviously like
did she read it?

Speaker 2 (31:16):
could you tell?

Speaker 1 (31:17):
I think at that time they didn't have that, that
feature yet, but I'm sure sheread it, you know.
But yeah, I don't know, like,and I'm just saying it to you
out there, if you ever listen toit and if you know who the who
you are like, I truly am sorry.
If I did anything wrong, like Ifeel like I'm a person where I

(31:37):
try not to.
I don't have bad intentions.
Maybe, like sometimes I do actlike how, like out of line
sometimes, and that's because Idon't know that I'm doing that,
you know.
But I don't have any illintentions and I really did want
to mend that friendship.
That's why I reached out to her, you know.
But if I did do anything wrong,like I not aware of it, and

(32:02):
maybe she was upset that I gotmarried, I don't know.
But I try to reach out to her.
I don't know, but I tried toreach out to her.
She didn't message me back, Ithink.
A couple years after that Ialso tried messaging her again,
but then again I didn't hearanything.

Speaker 2 (32:14):
So then I feel like that's how you and I are kind of
alike, Like we never sayanything or do anything with bad
intentions.
It's like like for me, I knowsometimes some of the things I
say, I know they come off alittle blunt and can be hurtful,
but that's not my intention.

(32:35):
Yeah, I do try to like this isme blaming the other person
because I don't want to be atfault.

Speaker 1 (32:43):
I'm playing victim again.

Speaker 2 (32:44):
Our witness.
But I like I'll bluntly saythings and I'm just going to say
this Maybe people should thinka little bit more.
Yeah, I don't know, because I'mnot.
I'm not saying what I'm sayingto be hurtful, yeah, to be
vindictive.
I'm saying it to like, as likea form of reality, yeah, but I

(33:05):
can also say so.
This was after high school,from your experience.

Speaker 1 (33:09):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (33:11):
Back then I probably wouldn't have been so bold.
I'm a bold bitch.

Speaker 1 (33:18):
I'm just going to say that.

Speaker 2 (33:19):
But have you always been a bold bitch, or is that
something that's?

Speaker 1 (33:21):
grown.
I feel like in high school Ihave Okay bitch, or is that
something that's like?
I feel like in high school Ihave okay.
Like I personally think I'vealways been like in high school
I feel like I have kind of likegot into that thing where like,
if I don't do it, I won't everget it.
If I don't like take thatchance, I'll never get it again.
So I try to take everything instride and if I have something

(33:42):
to say, I'm gonna say it,because later on I'm gonna go
home and I'm gonna be like, damn, I should have said that, you
know, and to me it's.
I'm more of a person where,like, yes, I know sometimes the
things that I say can be hurtful, but I'm also the type of
person where I rather let youknow now and avoid an issue than

(34:03):
not say anything and have anissue come, you know, kind of
like that.
So I'm just at that time likeand maybe again, maybe I was out
of line.
But if I'm out of line, tell me, don't.

Speaker 2 (34:16):
Right, don't like, and that's how I am.
Yeah, tell me yeah.

Speaker 1 (34:19):
Cause, yeah, sometimes I do need to be put in
check and if that's the case,do it.
But like, if you don't sayanything or if you don't put me
in check, I'm assume I'm right.
You know what I mean.

Speaker 2 (34:31):
I'm still probably going to assume that I'm right,
yeah.

Speaker 1 (34:35):
But again it is what it is Like.
You know, I think it would havebeen great to kept that
relationship, because she was areally good friend.
We did go through a lot ofstuff in high school and we were
really close, but people allgrow each other.
Maybe I was a toxic person, Idon't know.

Speaker 2 (34:52):
Well, I think that's the evolution of friendships in
general.
Yeah, kudos to those people outthere who can say that they
still have the same best friendssince kindergarten.
But, I think that friendshipsare meant to come into our lives
to teach us things, toexperience, to grow, and I don't
think everybody is meant a seatat the table for life.

Speaker 1 (35:16):
Yeah, it's like one of my besties.
I always say, anne from Ifinished.
Oh, look at her, she's quotingme right now no, I finished the
summer.
I turned pretty.
Yeah, I did.
But you know, friends come andgoes as seasons.
Boyfriends, loves, they comeand go as seasons.
Sometimes they're meant to stay, sometimes they're meant to go.

(35:39):
So it is what it is.

Speaker 2 (35:41):
Yeah yeah, that's exactly how I feel, and I don't,
you know, looking back on anyfriendships that may not be as
prominent as they once were, Idon't hold any ill will, no
grudges.
Yeah, yeah, I think thatthey've moved.

(36:03):
Some people have moved from youknow friends or best friends to
more acquaintances, but thatdoesn't change how I feel about
them.
I'm still, you know, I'm stillin the back of the room, rooting
for them when they share a poston Facebook, or I see them on
TV, or you know.

Speaker 1 (36:22):
Yeah, I'm like that too, like you know, for me, for
me, like I really do appreciatefriendship, like there's.
There's also that thing where,like you know you have, you
become friends with people younever expected to be friends.
Yeah, like like us.
Yeah, well, I mean, I mean youwere gonna make me your friend,

(36:42):
but I was like this he fell intomy rabbit hole.
But yeah, like there's thisother girl in high school where,
like she was like a popular kidand like she, like everybody
knew her, and then we hadceramics class together and we
became really, really close.
So there's, there's that too,where, like you know you,

(37:12):
there's those people who are thetotal opposite of you and you
never expect them to be yourfriends, but come to find out
again.
We are all just humans, yeah,you know.

Speaker 2 (37:15):
So shout out to.
Yeah, you, you know who you are.
Yeah, you don't want to givehim a shout out?
I don't because I don't to saythat I've been thinking.
There are multiple times a weekthat I will stop and like,
think about people that and howthey've impacted my life.

(37:39):
Yeah, we're gonna get a littlesentimental here okay, I'm not
gonna cry.

Speaker 1 (37:44):
I love it.
Cry, bitch, cry.
I can't, I'll pinch you.

Speaker 2 (37:47):
I can't cry, give me an onion.
But no, I do like to look backon people that I've crossed
paths with, whether that waslike continuous friendship or
whatever it was, and I do liketo take kind of like an
inventory and show somegratitude to the universe for

(38:08):
those people in my life.
There's still people that Ithink about like randomly, like
we were just talking the otherday about my friend Kirsten, who
commented on our podcast.
Shout out to Kirti if you'relistening.
She's so cute, she's so cute.
She's so sweet, yeah, and likewe saw each other when we worked
in the mall.
I know she told you that Iworked at the candy store she

(38:28):
worked at I think it was pearlvision at the time okay which
was like three stores down.
But like our paths crossed we,you know, had made this
friendship and it was just fromseeing each other in the mall
all the time.
And now it's like it's greatwhen I see her out and we can
like catch up or if she'slistening to the podcast, like.

(38:50):
But it's just little thingslike that, like no ill will love
her.
I'm so grateful that I met herand just, you know, little
things like that I still thinkabout.
There's a girl that I'm friendswith on Facebook from my very
first waitering job at Moe'sDiner out in Osseo and I still

(39:12):
see her posts on Facebook andit's just it's a great feeling
to see these people that I'vecrossed paths with and where
they are now and how wellthey're doing in life.
I love that yeah.
Yeah, it's just little thingslike that.
I really do appreciate it, butyeah.

Speaker 1 (39:28):
Okay, I guess I will do my shout out.
Okay, yeah, it's for Christina,hey Christina, hey Christina.
I don't know if she listens toour podcast, I don't think she
does, I'll never know.
But like, yeah, I never thoughtwe'd be friends because she was
like a popular girl or whatever.
But then, like, we did ceramicsand we were also in
self-defense and we werepartners, so you were in

(39:50):
self-defense.

Speaker 2 (39:50):
I'm learning all this stuff about yeah in high school
.

Speaker 1 (39:53):
we were actually the first spring lake park high
school that's where I went towas the first school to do
self-defense class.
Really, yeah, shout out to mrbill nice, he was our instructor
and he was also our EMTinstructor.
Oh yeah, he was really cool.
I mean, he kind of low-keydeleted me off of Facebook, but

(40:14):
still, no hard feelings.

Speaker 2 (40:16):
Again.
He deleted you on Facebook.
Yeah, because Wait why were youfriends with a teacher on
Facebook?
That's even weird.

Speaker 1 (40:25):
Well, he was friends with everybody because he's
really cool, but the thing wasagain, he was also one who
didn't like my ex because wewent to prom and then did you
guys go to high school togetherwho your ex no, we didn't okay.

Speaker 2 (40:35):
So how did he know your ex?
I'm sorry I'm interrupting, soyou'll find out here.

Speaker 1 (40:38):
So we we took, we went to prom this I think this
was junior year we went to promand then, or this is senior year
, we went to prom and this wasjunior year we went to prom and
then, or this was senior year wewent to prom and we took a
photo, like with our middlefinger, and I used that as my
profile picture.
And so then he actually and nowthat I think of it, like I
appreciate the gesture so much,but at the time I was stupid, I

(41:00):
was a dumb kid so he actuallypulled me aside and he said, hey
, like you know, I you're agreat student, you know, but
I've noticed that like there'sthese things that you've been
doing where your grade has beengoing down and stuff like that,
and I think it's because of whoyou're with.
And so then I was like I don'tknow what you mean.
And so he showed me my facebookprofile and he's like, yeah,

(41:21):
this girl right here, I don'tknow her.
Like I don't know her.
And it's like, yeah, this girlright here, I don't know her,
like I don't know her.
And yeah, like you, like doingthe middle finger, you're saying
fuck you to the world and youdon't give a fuck about the
world.
That's pretty much what he said.
I think he did say fuck, but Idon't remember.
But he said that, like me doingthat is not, it's not who I am,

(41:45):
and whoever I'm with, like whenI'm with him, that's not who I
am.
And so then I was just likeokay, like why do you care about
who I date?
But at the same time, like hewas just, he was just, you know,
it was a teaching moment, but Idid not take that as a at face
value.
So then yeah.
And so then he was just like,yeah, well, you know, if this is
who you want to proceed, I'mgoing to, I'm going to remove
you from my Facebook friend ormy Facebook profile.

(42:07):
And so he did that.
And so then I was just likeokay.
At that time I was like, okay,whatever, I don't really care,
you're my teacher, I don't needyou on Facebook anyways.
But now that I reflect on it,I'm like, oh, yeah, that's how
you know he's a good person,that's how you know that the

(42:27):
reason why people like him, thereason why people care about him
or like they even associatewith him, is because he is a
good person.
And again, shout out to mr billnice.
His initial would be be nice,which is n-e-i-s-s, but yeah, he
was.
He was an awesome teacher, Ithink.
Think that's you should reachout to him on Facebook.
I'm too shy right now.

Speaker 2 (42:46):
I'm not bold enough to do that right now.
She's shy again.

Speaker 1 (42:49):
Now we're getting back to shy, yeah, but yeah,
like I think that was a teachingmoment for me where I'm just
like goddamn, he was right, likehe's an adult and he was right
Like the teacher was right.

Speaker 2 (43:00):
That just shows the evolution of your maturity level
, because I think, in thoseinstances when we're, when we
were kids, we were always like,oh for fuck's sake, shut up yeah
like we don't care what youhave to say.
We don't.
I mean, we never listened toour parents.

Speaker 1 (43:12):
We didn't I mean, I did like.
That's the thing of like didyou, though I did.

Speaker 2 (43:17):
Did your parents like your ex?

Speaker 1 (43:19):
no, they didn't like him exactly, so you didn't
listen.
Yeah, at that time they didn'tlike him, but I guess our
parents knew a lot.
I don't know I mean, my parentsare very sheltered, so
everything that is not their wayis a bad way.

Speaker 2 (43:33):
So that's kind of where I'm like they know more
than you think they do, though,is what I'm getting at is like
when we're kids, we think thatour parents don't know anything.
Yeah, like you're right,because now that I'm older, like
i'll're kids, we think that ourparents don't know anything.
Yeah, like you're right,because now that I'm older, like
I'll look back on things thatmy grandma said and I'm like she
was fucking right.
Yeah, well, I should havefucking listened yes, you're
right, I actually should givethem more credit yeah yeah, they

(43:56):
are right.

Speaker 1 (43:57):
Listen to your mom and your dad's y'all yeah and
your grandparents and yourgrandpas and grandpas.

Speaker 2 (44:04):
Whoever's the main figures of your life.

Speaker 1 (44:06):
All right.
So you know, I know childhooddrama was rough, but you know it
just prepares you for theghosting game and the adult
friendships.
You know, in your opinion,anthony, is ghosting a friend
ever okay in adulthood, or is italways toxic, you think?

Speaker 2 (44:26):
As much as I hate this and I'm going to kick
myself in the ass later forsaying it I think it's a little
bit of a gray area gray areagray area.

Speaker 1 (44:33):
Now we're talking.

Speaker 2 (44:38):
I think that it's okay to ghost people in certain
circumstances and situations,but at the same time, I'm like
you should probably be an adultand just like, yeah, deal with.
And that's probably a bithypocritical for me, because I

(44:59):
wouldn't necessarily thatthere's say that there's people
that I've ghosted, because thereare people that I'm, I don't
know, I still consider myselffriends with.
I just don't talk to them, okay, as much as I used to, just
because you know, circumstanceschanged, yeah, life changed.
I may have grown, but I think Idon't know like again,

(45:20):
depending on what thecircumstances is like, I'm not
going to continue a friendshipwith somebody who's like
hardcore, you know, doing drugsevery single day, multiple times
a day, and like that.
I think I would not have aproblem ghosting.
Ok.
But I mean, if it's somethingminor, I would probably rather

(45:42):
just have that opencommunication.
Ok, do you think it's toxicthen, or no?

Speaker 1 (45:43):
I would probably rather just have that open
communication Like okay, do youthink it's toxic then, or no?

Speaker 2 (45:49):
I don't think so.
Okay.
I don't think so.
I think the mature thing to dois to just have that
conversation.
What about you?

Speaker 1 (46:00):
For me, like I know I've mentioned in the past where
I'm those type of people where,like, if, if, like I've given
you chances that I'm just goingto cut you off, I will take back
that a little bit, just alittle bit.
Like I'm the type of peoplelike, if I am going to cut you
off though I will tell you why Iwill be like, hey, you know,
like I'm thankful for thefriendship that we've shared,

(46:23):
I'm thankful for everything thatwe've had.
I'm thankful for the friendshipthat we've shared, I'm thankful
for everything that we've had.
But, you know, I think we'veoutgrown.
I've outgrown this or, you know, maybe we've outgrown each
other.
You know no hard feelings.
Obviously we'll still continueto be friends, but I think that
you know our paths are justgoing its own way Separate
directions.
Yeah, so you know, I just hopethat as a friend, you can

(46:43):
appreciate our time, that wespent together.
But you know, going forwardlike, don't take it as a
personal thing.
It's not you, it's me, and youknow that line.

Speaker 2 (46:55):
It's so cliche.

Speaker 1 (46:56):
It's not you, it is it is cliche, but it's the truth
, like it's the thing of, likeit really is me, it's not you,
like it's my own problem, likethat I'm dealing with and you
know it's not again, it's thething of.
I'm not trying to put fault onyou, it's on me.
Like I'm choosing to walk awayfrom this friendship, I'm
choosing to end this friendship,yeah, so yeah, it is on me,

(47:17):
it's not on you.
So that's just how it is.
I don't think it's always toxic, though I understand where,
like again, like you said, ifit's like somebody who does
drugs or whatever, like hey,more power to you, glad you're
feeling great.
But like I truly believe in the.
You are who you hang out with,you know, and if you surround

(47:39):
yourself with people that youdon't share the same values and
stuff like that, like then whatare you doing?
Kind of a thing.

Speaker 2 (47:47):
I like I think you're right we are.
We do kind of mirror the peoplethat we hang out with.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (47:58):
I'm a badass bitch and you're a badass bitch.

Speaker 2 (48:00):
I'm just thinking about past digressions and cause
.
I mean, there are people that Iam like I don't it's so hard
because it's like you know I'm.
I'm thinking about my pastrelationships and I'm like I
wouldn't say that I ghostedpeople, but there are people
that would probably say that Ighosted them.
Okay.
Which isn't and wasn't myintention.

(48:23):
It's just me step.
It was me stepping away fromcertain things.

Speaker 1 (48:27):
Yeah, I think I understand that too, like, and
you're right on that part.
Again, like I said, I may havethought that I didn't do
anything wrong, but maybe I did,and you know that's.
But that's not my intention.
I think that plays a big rolein a lot of friendships where,
like you know, either you'remisunderstood or like things are

(48:48):
left undone.
You know, but when you try tomend it, if the other person's
not interested, like, move on,walk away, because at that point
my thing is, you've already putin effort and if the other
person doesn't want it, don't domore than what you need to.
Yeah, cause it's going to bedesperate at that point and it's
not going to be genuine, youknow.
So, oh, obviously I'mdefinitely going to be more

(49:12):
choosy about what I say and whoI say things to.

Speaker 2 (49:15):
Yeah, that's one thing that I've learned.

Speaker 1 (49:17):
Yeah, and again, like to me, like I had no ill
intention, you know, I I'd liketo think that I'm not a person
who talks shit, who gossips,because I hate that shit.
Like again, I'm the person whowould prefer eating popcorn on

(49:37):
the sideline than being involvedin the drama.
Yeah, like, of course everybodyloves hot tea, everybody loves
gossip, but I personally, ifit's not my thing to say, I'm
going to stay out of it, I'drather just listen to it.
You know, and this scenario,like I was put in the
perspective of being thegossiper, and that's just not me

(49:58):
.
Like anybody who knows me, liketruthfully, knows that I'm not
that.
Like I yeah, you're really notyeah, I prefer to just listen,
you know?
Yeah, I talk a lot of shit toyour face like I make fun of you
, but I will never like.
I will never like I would neverMe personally.
Yeah, personally, I would nevergo around your back and gossip
about you, because it's just,that's just not who I am Like.

(50:21):
If anything, I'm like hypingyou up, like, oh my God, like
that's my girl, like that's myboy, you know, Okay, can I get
your input on something?

Speaker 2 (50:34):
Sure, okay, do you consider gossiping about behind
people's backs?
The reason that I'm asking thisis because I have recently,
probably within the last sixmonths, I've had people friends
of mine approach me and ask mequestions about other mutual

(50:54):
friends.
Okay, and I've answered theirquestions okay, and I'm just
wondering if that would beconsidered gossiping.
If it's like I'm saying pointblank facts, okay, is that
gossiping or like?
Or is gossiping more of likestretching the truth or lying or
making things to sound betterfor a person?

Speaker 1 (51:17):
My personal opinion on that is there's a fine line
between gossiping and justranting.
To rant with your friends,right, yeah, like girls talk,
that's it.
But if you are out here sharinginformation that I personally
told you and clearly with yourgood judgment I don't want other
people knowing, and you'retelling other people, yeah,

(51:39):
that's gossiping.

Speaker 2 (51:40):
Like, let's say, so if it's something that's like
sudden confidential, yeah.

Speaker 1 (51:46):
If it's like if I confide in you and you know it's
like near and dear to my heartand it's just between me and you
, then yeah I.
If you relay that informationto somebody else, then yeah, I
consider that gossiping.
But like if you were talkingwith a friend and they were
saying, hey, like you know thisand this person is doing this,

(52:07):
like what do you think about it?
Like should I like act acertain way?
Or like, hey, like this persondid this and this and this, like
how would you feel about that?
And you give your personalopinion, I don't think that's
gossiping.
I think that's more asking foradvice or just like seeing what
your thoughts are.
Yeah, I mean people couldinterpret gossip in a different

(52:29):
way, right?

Speaker 2 (52:30):
And that's where I'm like.
Well, so do you think that whenyou're speaking with somebody,
do you feel the need to have topreface a conversation with?
This is like I'm confiding insomething that's personal to you

(52:53):
, like the other person shouldbe able to acknowledge and
differentiate between what isbeing said in confidence and
what is being said.

Speaker 1 (53:03):
I think there's certain, there's certain
scenarios, and tells like I'mgoing to say this and I'm, I'm.
It's going to be one of thethings where I said what I said,
kind of a thing.
You cannot read people's minds.
Okay, like you cannot saysomething and all of a sudden
assume I don't need you to saythat to anybody else, if you
don't want it relayed, say hey,this is just between you and me,

(53:25):
okay, yeah, period.
But if you're going to go on andtell me a story and then just
expect me to be like not thinkanything about it, then I'm
gonna be like, oh, okay.
Well, because my thing is, if Iand I always say this, and I,
I'm sure you I don't know ifI've said this to you before,
but I've said it to other peoplethat I've talked about in

(53:46):
confidence where, like, if Icould say it to that person's
face, then it's not gossip, it'sfacts, it's truth.
But if I'm like, hey, like, ifI tell you this but don't say
anything to anybody else, bitch,it's supposed to be between me
and you, that's it, nobody.
Yeah, because, like again, itcomes down to like, if I could

(54:10):
say it to that person's face whoI'm talking about, then it's
just, it is what it is.
I could say to that person'sface who I'm talking about, then
it's just, it is what it is.
I will say to them, if theywere here too, you know.
So technically it's not reallygossip, you know that makes
sense.

Speaker 2 (54:24):
You know what I mean, yeah.

Speaker 1 (54:25):
Like it's not.

Speaker 3 (54:26):
I don't consider it gossip If it's something that I
would say to somebody's faceyeah.

Speaker 2 (54:30):
Then it's open.

Speaker 1 (54:33):
Because the thing is, if you go and tell this person
that I said it, bitch, I'm goingto say it to them anyway.
So is it really gossip?

Speaker 2 (54:39):
No, yeah, that's a good way to look at it, yeah.
If you were to come to me andask me if I said something, if I
am going to look at you and say, no, I didn't say that when I
did.
It's something I shouldn'tprobably have.

Speaker 1 (54:52):
Exactly Been when.

Speaker 2 (54:53):
I did.
It's something I shouldn'tprobably have been saying
Exactly.
Yeah, that's a good way to lookat it?

Speaker 1 (54:56):
Yeah, because, like I get it, like you know, there's
always going to be drama,there's always going to be
disagreements, there's alwaysgoing to be people doing shit
that you don't like.
But the thing is, is that likeif you could say to their face
is it really job, gossip thoughyou?

Speaker 2 (55:15):
know what I mean.

Speaker 1 (55:15):
Yeah, like if she was sitting right here and I'm
talking to you and I'm gonna belike, hey, this person is this
and this and this, but then Iwill.
You know clearly that it'ssomething I would clearly say to
her.
Is it really gossip, right?
So that's just how I see it.

Speaker 2 (55:29):
But yeah, that's a good way to look at it.

Speaker 1 (55:30):
You know I like that, maybe it is gossip, I don't
fucking know.
But again, if you were here I'dstill say it to your face, so
it don't matter you always sayit's my face oh, I have a good
one here for you.
A good question here for youhow do you feel about calling

(55:52):
out friends who ghost you, butkeep some posting on social
media?

Speaker 2 (55:58):
What do you mean?
Keeps posting, posting about me.

Speaker 1 (56:01):
No, let's just say you had a friend and she ghosted
you, but you're writing her amessage, but she doesn't look at
it or read it for days, butthen you still see her posting
on social media and stuffbecause clearly she's still
active.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, how do you feel aboutthat?

(56:23):
At that point, do you feel like, oh, she's clearly ignoring me?
Or like, oh, maybe she'll getto it.
She just haven't read it yet.
Maybe she has a lot of messages.
How do you feel about that?

Speaker 2 (56:40):
I think I would give them the benefit of the doubt.
Okay, short term.
So like, if I send a message,they haven't read it, they
haven't opened it, haven'tresponded back after a couple
days I might send like afollow-up okay and if still
nothing after a week, okay, if Ihaven't heard anything, they

(57:00):
haven't read it and they'restill active on social media
like posting stuff.
I I'm not stupid enough to belike keep trying.
I'm like, okay, I, I will takethe hint.
Yeah, you don't want to talk tome, you don't want to hear what
I have to say?
Got it deuces, okay, what aboutyou?

Speaker 1 (57:22):
you're more generous than I am.
Like I'd give him like two daystops.
It's the thing.
It's that thing again whereI've said bitches can't be that
fucking busy.

Speaker 2 (57:32):
Bitches can't be that busy.
But the reason I say a week isbecause I'm thinking yeah, maybe
I am being too generous, but Iwas thinking like maybe they
have a lot going on.
Yeah, but and like if I'mmessaging them like something
that's like an in-depth, like weneed to have a serious
conversation, I could understandnot responding yeah, back right

(57:55):
away, Especially like.
Think about, like I'm thinking,if somebody had their dad was
in the hospital.

Speaker 1 (58:02):
But I still responded to you within that same day.

Speaker 2 (58:05):
Yeah, that's true.

Speaker 1 (58:07):
Like.

Speaker 2 (58:10):
And how close of friends am I with this person
Like am I like best friends withthis person?
I don't know just in general,but I'm just saying that plays a
factor, like with us, like this.
Don't take this the wrong way,but I would expect that even if
your dad was in the hospital,that we would be in
communication yeah versus a, anacquaintance of mine, who I see

(58:33):
out socially or you know textwith maybe once a week or three
times a week.
I would give them the benefitthat, okay, maybe they have
something going on.

Speaker 1 (58:43):
I guess that's the difference between us.
I don't have acquaintances, Iusually just message who I
message on the daily, like Ihave a tight-knit group of
friends, like I have mytight-knit, but then I have,
like, my acquaintances yeah, Idon't have that and then yeah so
I guess that's that's it, yeahyeah, I don't know.

(59:04):
Yeah, I, it's just to me again.
I'm not very that giving.
I'm also impatient.
But the reason why I say thatis think about how many times
you click on TikTok, you clickon Facebook in a day.
Think about how often you do.

Speaker 2 (59:19):
A lot, I know.

Speaker 1 (59:20):
So that again it comes to play as like how busy
can you be?
Like you could clearly read mymessage, you could clearly watch
a Facebook reel, you couldclearly watch an Instagram reel,
tiktok reel and you can't likelook at my message.
You can't respond to me yeahyou know, I don't know, maybe
I'm just a bitch, but that'sjust how I feel like, again, it

(59:41):
comes down to me valuing my timelike if I'm I don't know and
again I'm gonna sound like abitch, but the realism of it is
that, like you click on yourFacebook more than 20 times
guaranteed a day.

Speaker 2 (59:55):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (59:55):
And I'm sure you check your messages, your
Facebook TikTok, your email,amazon.
Think about how many times youclick on that.
And if somebody messages youand you can't even look at it or
read it like wow.

Speaker 2 (01:00:10):
I always used to get like frustrated with my aunt
because my aunt that passed away.
I knew that she's always on herphone, always on her phone.
I would text her Three dayslater I'd get a response.
Yeah.
I'm like what you doing.
I know you're on your phone.
Yeah, she used to do that.

(01:00:32):
I know you're on your phone.
Yeah, she used to do that, likeshe would download those apps
where she would like the colorby numbers and she would like
color pictures and then likesend them to me.
Oh, that's cute and so it'slike I know you're on your phone
girl yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:00:44):
But, I mean, I get it .
There's also those people where, like, let's say, somebody
messages you and you're like, oh, I know this person's gonna
talk shit, or I already knowwhat they're gonna talk about.
I get it.
There's those conversationsthat you want to avoid, but then
that lies the question of thenevaluate those type of people
that you don't want in your lifebecause, yeah, because at that

(01:01:05):
point you're, you're puttingyourself in that situation.
So, all in all, again, ain't nobitches that busy to respond to
you.

Speaker 2 (01:01:14):
You don't have to entertain all of those.

Speaker 1 (01:01:18):
Those messages yeah you're wasting your time.

Speaker 2 (01:01:21):
So you're kind of your question, kind of like
piggies back off.
I had a question for you whichwas how would you respond to
someone who ghosted you?
But you see that they're stilllike watching your stories.
Oh OK.
Because you know, like onFacebook and Snapchat, you can
tell who who looked at it.

Speaker 1 (01:01:36):
Who's looked at it?

Speaker 2 (01:01:36):
Yeah, and Instagram, yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:01:38):
Oh well for me.
Like that draws a clear line tome that like, okay, well, the
bitch this, okay, I shouldn'tsay bitch, but this person wants
to keep tabs on me, but theycan't respond to me.
Like that just shows me wherethe friendship lies.
Like clearly they don't want torespond to me, but they want to
watch what I do so they'realways bad though I don't know.

(01:02:01):
I feel like that's not genuine,though I don't feel like that's
genuine okay, and I'm justlooking at it from my
perspective.

Speaker 2 (01:02:07):
Like I said earlier, like just because we're not
friends anymore, I'm stillrooting for you.
I'm still watching your storiesand seeing that you're doing
nails.

Speaker 1 (01:02:16):
I guess that's true.
I'm still cheering you on Like.
I'm still supporting you.
It's that trust issue I have.
Look at me.

Speaker 2 (01:02:23):
Where did you get trust issues from?

Speaker 1 (01:02:25):
Everywhere, anyone, everyone, anytime.
Just kidding, but yeah, I guessthat's a good way to put it,
but normally, guess that's agood way to put it.
But normally though, like andmaybe it's just me, like, if I'm
rooting from afar, though I'mthis type of people were like,
if I see it, I would see like,oh my god, girl you did it yeah,
like that's me, like that's meactually supporting, that's me
actually showing that, hey, Isee you like I'm so happy for

(01:02:49):
you because and again, maybethat's just who I am, but that's
how I express support, you knowwhat I mean.

Speaker 2 (01:02:58):
Yeah, so you're better than me bitch, because,
well, I think that just likeliking your story oh, yeah, like
liking like that, yeah, likeeven liking like that, like I
wouldn't go out of my way tolike comment yeah but even just
liking it would be like showingsupport.

Speaker 1 (01:03:14):
But if you're just there lurking, that's a
different scenario.

Speaker 2 (01:03:18):
I wouldn't go out of my way to comment on it.
So if I ever do go out of myway to comment on something that
you post, or anybody posts,take it as a sign.

Speaker 1 (01:03:27):
Yeah, I don't know, I'm a like and I'm a comment
whore.

Speaker 2 (01:03:31):
I'm a double tap scroll, yeah, liking.
I'm a comet whore, so I'm adouble tap scroll, yeah.
Double tap scroll, yeah.
So yeah, all right.
Well, if ghosting's the coldshower, what about those friends
who would only reach out whenthey need a favor time to talk
emotional freeloading?
Okay okay.
So how do you handle a friendwho only shows up to vent or get

(01:03:54):
help, but never checks in onyou?

Speaker 1 (01:03:56):
For me, like I know some people, I think I do feel
like some of my friendships arelike that.
Again, I get it Like you haveyour own lives.
I'm not the main character.
I give main character energy,but I ain't the main character,
love that character.
I give main character energy,but I ain't the main character,
love that.
But I think for me, like I justreciprocate, like if that's how

(01:04:23):
you want this friendship to bematch their energy I see, yeah,
I see you and I'm a match, thatenergy.
that's just how it is, becauseclearly I know I have some
friends in my life that I Ivalue their friendship, I value
their time, I value the thingswe've gone through.
But again, shift in dynamic,shift in friendship, shift in
priorities and priorities.

(01:04:43):
So you know, if if that's howit is, that's okay with me.
Like I'm not going to make it abig deal.
I understand people have lives,but I will just give you the
same energy.

Speaker 2 (01:04:58):
I think that's a great thing to do is to just
match their energy.

Speaker 1 (01:05:02):
Is that how you would approach it, though, or are you
, mr Petty?

Speaker 2 (01:05:10):
I don't think I'm petty, because I think I'm the
type of person that I willentertain you.
I will listen to you, I willlisten to your events, but then
I'll probably bitch about itlater, about how god damn Nali
only calls me when she wants tobitch about this.

Speaker 1 (01:05:28):
Okay, I'm kind of like that too, actually Never
mind.
But then again I'm kind of likethe other thing too, where,
like I just I just feed the sameenergy.

Speaker 2 (01:05:38):
I think you have to do that.
But the only issue with feedingthat energy like giving back
the same energy that you'regetting in a friendship I would
worry that at some point thatperson's going to turn it around
on you, like why are you onlydoing this, why are you only
talking?
And heaven forbid if it's thatfriend that you call out and

(01:06:02):
you're like hey, I'm justmatching your energy, you only
message me when you have anissue with your partner, or like
that's all you want to talkabout.

Speaker 1 (01:06:14):
Yeah, you know partner or like that.
That's all you want to talkabout, yeah you know, I mean for
me like if, if somebody's, ifmy friend has given me that
energy, I will tell them.
Though I would be like, hey,like you know, I do feel like
you're only coming to me whenyou're venting and I do feel
like you're only coming to mewhen you have an issue.
I'm not gonna say you're a badfriend, obviously, like I'm sure
friendship is a two-way street.
Yeah, I'm sure you're not goingto say you're a bad friend.

Speaker 2 (01:06:33):
Obviously, like I'm sure, Friendship is a two-way
street.

Speaker 1 (01:06:34):
Yeah, I'm sure you're not trying to like, make it
seem like that, but I am telling, I'm going to tell you how I
feel about it and you do withwhat you want with that
information.
If you want to continue to havethis small talk, friendship,
yeah, we two can play this game.
But if you're just like, ohyeah, I want a more meaningful

(01:06:56):
relationship, obviouslyeverybody wants a more
meaningful relationship but thenagain, yeah, like there's more
that comes to play, like thehistory, the dynamic, like who
they are, you know what partthey play in your life, and
there's some where I'm morewilling to bend than others.
But, like you know, I will belike, hey, like I'm upset at you
because I feel like you'redoing this and you know I hope

(01:07:18):
that, like we are, we do better.
I hope that you do better.
And if it's, if it's somethingthat it's only in my head and I
feel like maybe how I'm feelingabout you is wrong, let me know
again, put me in check, ifyou're too busy with your, your,
your own life.
But you know you're justchecking in with me.
Let me know because, again,we're not here to play blues

(01:07:41):
clues.
I cannot read your mind you knowoh yeah, we're not here playing
blues clues, so yeah, so Ithink, that's just how I feel
about it.
Like again my time is valuable.
So I'd rather be sleeping thantexting you.

Speaker 2 (01:08:00):
So you and sleep girl .
Do you have narcolepsy?
Probably Do you have a sleepdisorder of some sort?

Speaker 1 (01:08:07):
Yeah, I probably do.
It's because I have insomnia.
I can't really sleep at night,and then during the day I'm just
like a tired bitch.

Speaker 2 (01:08:14):
A zombie.

Speaker 1 (01:08:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:08:17):
No but I think that that's.
I agree with that.
Okay, Wholeheartedly.
But then you know what makessorry, go ahead.
Okay, I just want to pick youback up, yeah.
So what makes it reallydifficult is when you do have
that friend that you do call outand you say that I'm matching
their energy, but they're likethey don't see it yeah like what

(01:08:39):
do you do with that?
I don't know, have aconversation with that friend
yeah, but that's what I'm sayingis like you have the
conversation but it doesn't goanywhere because they don't see
it, they don't see what they'redoing, they only see what you're
doing.
I guess Even the fact thatyou're doing and mirroring what

(01:09:00):
they're doing, Cut the umbilicalcord.

Speaker 1 (01:09:02):
That's what you do.
I'm just kidding, I don't know.
I don't know.
That's a very hard question.
Like listeners, what do youthink?
Like you know, yeah, listeners,what do you think?
Like you know?
Yeah, you let us know.

Speaker 2 (01:09:12):
Like, what do you do when you have that friend that
you're mirroring and giving thesame energy they're giving, and
when they call you out on it,you let them know that you're
mirroring it, but they're notLike do you end it?
They don't see it.

Speaker 1 (01:09:26):
Do you continue just doing it Like you know?
You let us know, because we'restumped on that one.
Yeah, because I don't know how?

Speaker 2 (01:09:34):
I don't know how I'd do it, how I would handle that.

Speaker 1 (01:09:37):
I'd probably still do the same thing.
That's how that's me.

Speaker 2 (01:09:41):
Just keep matching it .

Speaker 1 (01:09:41):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:09:42):
You're calling me out .
I'm going to call you out, yeah.
But okay, my next question toyou is does emotional mismatch
mean that the friendship isbroken or just in need of a
reset?
Does the emotional mismatchmean the friendship is broken?

(01:10:03):
I don't know that.
That.
What do you think?
Let me think about this, aboutthis well, it's a really good
question and I'm trying to thinklike I guess my answer to that
would be it really needs to besomething where the two people

(01:10:25):
or the group of people need tohave that conversation, because
if your paths are going indifferent directions, it's going
in different directions.

Speaker 1 (01:10:33):
You can't force a friendship yeah, and that's
exactly what I'm actually gonnasay where, like for me, I
wouldn't necessarily say it'sbroken.
I think it's just to the pointwhere you guys value different
things and you've outgrown eachother.
You know like you.
Again, it comes with the thingof like.
You are who you hang out withand if you guys don't hold the

(01:10:56):
same values, if you guys don'thold like the same, like energy,
like it's okay to like outgrowpeople, obviously you're gonna
go on your own path.
It doesn't mean you're better,more or less than the other
person, it's just we don't havethe same like or commonalities.
And again it comes down togenuine friendship, because if

(01:11:21):
we don't have anything in common, how are we going to keep this
relationship?
Alive.
So I think it's not necessarilybroken.
I think that just comes to thepoint where you're like okay,
well, maybe we're just going ourown different paths and that's
just comes.
That's just your, your.
It just comes to the pointwhere you're like, OK, well, you
know, maybe we're just going ondifferent paths and that's OK.

Speaker 2 (01:11:39):
That is OK.

Speaker 1 (01:11:40):
It's not broken, it's just growth.

Speaker 2 (01:11:42):
I feel like that's something that people like.
We need to remember that more.
Yeah.
Like, just because you'refriends now, it's not guaranteed
that that friendship is goingto last the rest of your life.
Exactly.
Would it be great to have thatgroup of friends that you make
it to the finish line of lifewith?
Yeah, that would be great.

(01:12:03):
Yeah, but I don't think thatit's always realistic yeah,
because you know everybody'sdifferent.

Speaker 1 (01:12:10):
Like you know they have, you know they have their
own values.
They have their own likeinterests, whatever.
And like you and I, anthony,this is for life.
I'm just going to point thatout right now.

Speaker 2 (01:12:21):
The podcast or this friendship.

Speaker 1 (01:12:22):
This friendship, both .
This is for life.
But I'm just saying that, likeyou know, obviously, like you
know, people agree on differentthings, people value different
things and, you know, sometimesthat will affect how the
relationship is.
You know, like, if you don'tshare the same beliefs, like

(01:12:44):
it's okay, you believe what youwant to believe, I'll believe
what I want to believe, but justdon't be upset if I choose to
go a different route than you do.
Like, and that's okay, right,because what's said has been
said.
And I'm also those type ofpeople like when you say
something, don't just say to sayit, because clearly you're

(01:13:07):
saying something to meansomething.
You know right.
So you know, friends grow apartand that's okay.
Like, we value different thingsand that's okay, yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:13:17):
And again, we just have to keep remembering it.
It's not anything, there's noanimosity.
Yeah, there's no ill will, it'sjust.

Speaker 1 (01:13:27):
It is what it is.

Speaker 2 (01:13:28):
This is the course that the universe has lined out
for our relationship.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:13:35):
But yeah, that's how I feel.

Speaker 2 (01:13:38):
That's how you feel that's how we seize it.
And that's how, sue, I know Iso want to say that every time I
say it.

Speaker 1 (01:13:45):
that's the only reason why I say it, Cause every
time I say it, I say that youthink of that.

Speaker 2 (01:13:48):
Yeah, I fucking love that episode.

Speaker 1 (01:13:50):
I love her Alright.
Okay, let's change the subject.
Enough about text and therapy.
What about when you get leftoff the invite list but still
have to watch the party unfoldon social media?
Oof, how do you respond whenyou're excluded from friendship
trips or events but then you'restill tagged in the wish you

(01:14:12):
were here posts?

Speaker 2 (01:14:14):
Okay.
Well, that's a double-edgedsword right there, okay.
So first of all, if I'mintentionally excluded, okay and
then I'm being tagged in wishyou were here post.
That's gonna piss me off okay,poor k.
Well, I just think that's rude.
Hey, there's 10 of us.
We're gonna a trip.
Well, we're not inviting you,but we're going to tag you in it

(01:14:35):
.
Hey, wish you were here.
Wish you were here, bitch.
You should have invited me thenMaybe I would have fucking been
there.

Speaker 1 (01:14:43):
I love how angry you are.

Speaker 2 (01:14:46):
I'm not, no, I'm not angry, I'm just saying like
that's.

Speaker 1 (01:14:48):
We need visuals.
We needed to see that live.
But that's rude.
Yeah, they're just being abitch.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:14:57):
And that's going to make me question my like my
friendship with you.
My relationship with you.
Yeah, like.
But it's another thing toinvite me where I decline or I
can't make it for whateverreason.
Yeah, and then tag me in thewish you were here post.

Speaker 1 (01:15:12):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, Like that's fine.

Speaker 2 (01:15:19):
That reason, yeah, and then tag me in the wish you
were here post.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, like that'sfine, that's how it should go
actually that's how it should go.
Yeah, but to intentionallyexclude me, and then that's just
rude.

Speaker 1 (01:15:24):
Yeah, that's a poor friend.

Speaker 2 (01:15:24):
Yeah, that's a bitch being a bitch yeah, yeah, I
agree with you.

Speaker 1 (01:15:26):
100 on that one.
You put the itch in bitch.
Yeah, I'm fucking dead.
I've never heard that before.
I don't think I've heard it.
I'm gonna use that.
You put the itch in bitch.
I'm fucking dead.

Speaker 2 (01:15:44):
Did I send this to you?
I fucking love that.

Speaker 1 (01:15:46):
I'm gonna use that from now on.

Speaker 2 (01:15:49):
I saw this old guy wearing a shirt the other day.
It was a screenshot from Idon't't know if it was the UK or
somewhere Another country.
It's from a news segment.
This old guy was wearing thisblue shirt I want this shirt so
badly.
And it said I put the sexy indyslexic.

Speaker 1 (01:16:09):
Oh yeah, I saw that you tagged me in it.
Did I tag you in it?
Yeah, so stupid.
That's hilarious.

Speaker 2 (01:16:11):
Okay.
Oh yeah, I saw that you taggedme in it.
Did I tag you in it?
Yeah, it's so stupid I wantthat, that's hilarious.
Okay, so you're the same as me.

Speaker 1 (01:16:19):
Yeah, you would be pissed if they.
Oh yeah, I'd be, I would bepetty.

Speaker 2 (01:16:26):
How would you be petty.
What petty revenge would youget on those quote-unquote
friends?

Speaker 1 (01:16:33):
I don't know.
I'd do the same thing.
I'd go on a fucking trip andtag him and be like, oh, I wish
you were here.
Oops, sorry, I forgot to tellyou.
I don't fucking know.

Speaker 2 (01:16:41):
Oh, you know what would be really good, what To
like either go someplace or likego out in your town.
Like you know, when you go outto dinner you remember how you
were saying you'd like to go byyourself.
Yeah, take pictures of yourfood.
Oh, yeah, maybe go out, take apicture of food, post it and say
wish I had been invited.
Or something like tag all allyour friends and like come up

(01:17:04):
with a nice caption and be likewish I was invited.

Speaker 1 (01:17:08):
Wish y'alls were here , or something.
I don't know, I just I don'tknow.
I just I don't know.
I'd like to think that I wantto be petty, but at the same
time I'm also like I hope y'allfall on trip and break an angle
or something that escalatedquickly.

Speaker 2 (01:17:22):
Well, if they're being bitchy on purpose, like I
hope you have a bad trip I feellike I'm the type of person that
I would like private messagethem or text them and be like
really, oh yeah, like I'm tocall you out on your shit, like
really.
Yeah, you're not going toinvite me, and then you're going
to tag me in all these funposts that you're having.

Speaker 1 (01:17:41):
Yeah, I don't know.
Realistically, I think I'd dothe.
I'd probably do the like thegoing out and then like doing
the oh well, I wasn't invited,but whatever, I going out and
then like doing the oh well, Iwasn't invited, but whatever,
I'm enjoying my meal.
Still kind of a thing.
Yeah, or I'd be like I don'tgive a fuck, I just know who
this bitch is now like I knowthe real her.

(01:18:02):
Kind of a thing yeah, that'sthat would.

Speaker 2 (01:18:05):
That would open a lot .
Yeah, like if somebody were todo that and it opened up my eyes
.

Speaker 1 (01:18:12):
I saw, saw the sign.
That's what's up.
Yeah, that's what's up.
That's what's up.

Speaker 2 (01:18:18):
So, off of that, have you ever found out that you,
that you were excluded fromsomething because of a post?

Speaker 1 (01:18:24):
I wouldn't say that I was excluded, but I've been in
scenarios where, like a friendwould lie to me that something
didn't happen and then I wouldsee the proof of it that, oh,
they did this and this withso-and-so and they lied to me.

Speaker 2 (01:18:43):
What do you mean?
Give me an example of somethingthat you would see as proof.

Speaker 1 (01:18:47):
Okay, so for example they would be like oh, I'm busy
this weekend because I'm doingthis and this.
Be like oh, I'm busy thisweekend because I'm doing this
and this, but at the end of thenight I see them being tagged in
somebody else's photo andthey're at the bar drinking or
something like that.
Like that would piss me thefuck off, because, one, I hate
it, absolutely hate it whenpeople lie to me and two, I hate

(01:19:09):
it even more that I have proofthat you're a fucking liar so
have you ever had that friendthat like doubled down and was
like, oh no, that picture's fromlast year.
Yeah, I've had.

Speaker 2 (01:19:21):
Oh my.

Speaker 1 (01:19:21):
God, to me it just it's laughable.
It's laughable to me, Like I'mjust like okay.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:19:38):
Yeah, I don't think I've ever had that happen.

Speaker 1 (01:19:45):
Well, you have some really good friends, aka me.

Speaker 2 (01:19:48):
AKA you.

Speaker 1 (01:19:49):
You're my only friend , Lioness.
So much of my acquaintance.
My group of friends.

Speaker 2 (01:19:55):
My acquaintances?
No, because I think that, likemy group of friends that I used
to have, like we used to havelike Like we would do things
together.
Okay, and so it was never likeI don't think it was.

Speaker 1 (01:20:14):
I don't ever remember like them doing something and
like me seeing something onsocial media that I hadn't been
invited, okay okay, that's agood segue to my next question
is it worse to be left out or torealize that you weren't even
thought of or invited?

Speaker 2 (01:20:35):
Is it worse to be left out or to realize you
weren't even thought of?
For me personally, I think thatit would be to realize that I
wasn't even thought of yeahbecause I feel like, and I feel
like you're the same way, god,we are like two peas in a pod.

(01:20:57):
Yeah, we are twins now I forgotwhere I was going with this but
oh.
I think that we're the type ofpeople that we do invest energy
and time into people that for itto not even be thought of would

(01:21:18):
be hurtful.

Speaker 1 (01:21:20):
Because we're sentimental people.

Speaker 2 (01:21:22):
I think we're both sentimental and emotionally
invested people.

Speaker 1 (01:21:28):
I'd agree with that.
Yeah, I have a side question onthat though.

Speaker 2 (01:21:32):
Okay, let's say, Is this a question or a scenario?
It's a hypothetical.

Speaker 1 (01:21:38):
So let's say that you , it's a sense of, let me see,
let me think of this, let methink of how to word it real
quick.
The stupid thing is I forgotwhat my alphabet had to go with
this bitch.

Speaker 2 (01:21:54):
I'm fucking leaving this in now, this bitch.

Speaker 1 (01:21:58):
Okay, hold on.
No, it's a good question, Ipromise you.
Is it birth being left out, orrealizing you weren't enough?
Okay, got it.
Here's the scenario.
Okay, so you know how, likefriends, like if you're close
friends, you know that.
Oh, like, if I was to invitethis person, they wouldn't even
enjoy it anyways.
Would you be mad if, let's say,they went to a rave and you

(01:22:23):
don't like this rave, or youdon't like raves in general, but
they didn't invite you?

Speaker 2 (01:22:33):
knowing that you didn't like raves, would you be
upset that they didn't inviteyou?
You know what?
Yes, that's a really goodquestion.
Yeah, I think that I would be.
I wouldn't be mad, okay, Iwould be hurt why you don't even
like it but it's just thethought of being included okay
like if you know I'm going tosay no, ask me anyway.
Like there's no hurt in that, Iguess.

(01:22:56):
But it's like what if let's saythis happened on, let's say,
friday night, all right, soFriday, you and your friends
that I know, let's say, likeStephanie and Bor, like I know

(01:23:18):
some of your friends, I don'tknow all of your friends.

Speaker 1 (01:23:20):
It's okay, yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:23:21):
So Friday night you guys are planning to go to the
cities and you're going to goclubbing and dancing and have a
good time.
But you're like, yeah,anthony's not really into that
scene, we're not going to askhim and I haven't talked to you.
And let's say what if I gotfired on Friday and it's just
like maybe it's just such ashitty day or it's been such a

(01:23:43):
shitty week that maybe I wouldhave said yes, okay, maybe I
would have no guarantee, yeah,but just the fact that you would
have thought to be like, hey, Iknow you, even if you ask it
like that, hey, I know you'renot really into going clubbing,
but we're going to the citiesand we're going to go clubbing
tonight.
Do you want to go?
Yeah.

(01:24:04):
Maybe Maybe I do.
Maybe I had a shitty week go,yeah, maybe, maybe I do.
Maybe I had a shitty week,maybe I could.
Maybe I could won 500 bucks ona lottery ticket and I want to
go out and I'll buy y'all shots.

Speaker 1 (01:24:17):
I don't fucking know interesting what about you I'm
the opposite you're the oppositeyeah, we're like I'm okay, like
I'm set in my ways kind of aperson.
So like I personally I probablywouldn't be hurt.
I didn't think of it that way,though you bring up a really
good point, like, again, itdoesn't hurt to ask.
I understand that completely.

(01:24:38):
But I'm also the type of personwhere, like, if we've done it
like maybe once or twice, and Iknow that you're not into it, if
we've done it like maybe onceor twice and I know that you're
not into it, I probably wouldn'task you, because one like I
already know the answer.
But then again it's in thatscenario where you either lost
your job or whatever, and maybeyou'd want to go.
I don't know, but I don't know.

(01:25:01):
I'm just the type of personwhere, like, I'm like, oh, like,
if, if she doesn't like raves,she probably will say no anyway.
So I think we'll sit her out onthis one.
But I will be like, hey, justto let you know that we're going
to do this.
I wouldn't necessarily like,it's not really inviting, but

(01:25:21):
it's telling you to see if youwould take the bait, kind of a
thing, where I would be like,hey, we're going to go do this
Friday night.
Okay, but like, but put theball in your court, kind of a
thing where I would be like, hey, we're gonna go do this friday
night okay, but like but put theball in your court, kind of
thing but for people like me.

Speaker 2 (01:25:34):
I'm not the type of person I'm not gonna invite
myself to go with you like I'mnot just going to so you don't
do self-invites kind of no, okay, no oh, okay, interesting, I
would.
I would never.
I would never just show up atyour house.

Speaker 1 (01:25:51):
Oh well, yeah, of course you would.
Just, I wouldn't do that either.

Speaker 2 (01:25:54):
I'm the type of person who, no, but I mean just
for an example, like I'm notgoing to invite myself to
something, or over to your house, even without being like, hey,
can I come over.
Or like if it's you saying, oh,we're going to go to a rave
tonight, I would neverself-invite.

Speaker 1 (01:26:16):
I don't know.
I guess I thought the oppositewhere, if you didn't like it, I
thought it was a courtesy ofjust being like oh, you know
what, I know she's not going tolike that, so let's just not do
that, just not invite her.

Speaker 2 (01:26:30):
And it might be for some people, but then, oh,
that's what else I was going tosay to you.
That's also I don't know theproper term, but I'm just going
to say it's a little unfortunatethat you're making up the mind
for somebody else.
I guess, Like you're making upmy decision, you're taking that
right, oh, that decision awayfrom me.

(01:26:51):
Okay to say maybe, yeah, Iwould want to go.
Okay, and what does it hurt toreally ask?
I mean, even if you knowthey're gonna say no, it's 10
seconds out of your life to senda text message to say, hey,
we're gonna go do this.
Would you like to come with?

Speaker 1 (01:27:04):
yeah well, I'm gonna say I agree with that.
I'd like to be the like, Iagree with that.
But I am the person who willinvite the village, though,
because what do you mean?
You would invite the village,like if we were going on an
event, like if there's somethinggoing up, I would be the one to
ask you like, hey, oh, I knowyou don't want it anyways, but
we're gonna go.
Do you want to go?

(01:27:25):
But but for me personally, likeif it's vice versa, where, like
, if somebody doesn't ask me togo, I'm okay with it.
I wouldn't be hurt.
Yeah, I wouldn't be like, ohwell, that's because you'd
rather be sleeping.
Yeah, exactly, exactly, that'slike to me.
I probably wouldn't take itpersonally.
I wouldn't be hurt, cause I'mlike, yeah, you're right, I
don't like it.
Anyway, I do have FOMO.

(01:27:45):
Fomo is fear of missing out.
I do have FOMO sometimes, butlike at the end of the day,
again I'd be sleeping.
I'd rather spend time homebecause it's sight, I'm good, we
Gucci, yeah, yeah.
So, in perspective, Ipersonally, if you were to leave
me out because you know that Idon't like this or that, I
probably wouldn't get hurtBecause I'm like, yeah, it's

(01:28:07):
fine, good call.
But if it's the other wayaround, I'm always the person
who would be like let's invitemom, dad, sister, brother.
You know so, and really that'san issue that I have.
I feel like I invite too manypeople, because there's also
instances where they're like,hey, it's just me and you, let's
just be me and you.
But then I'd be like, hey, blah, blah, blah, and I are gonna go

(01:28:28):
do this.
Do y'all want to come along?
Yeah, I would be like that.

Speaker 2 (01:28:31):
So I got issues you gotta figure your life out.

Speaker 1 (01:28:34):
I do now, I'd rather sleep you're not getting any
younger yeah, bitch, excuse meall right, we've heard the
receipts.

Speaker 2 (01:28:44):
now it's time to enter the courtroom of public
opinion twin tangents where webreak it all down, call it all
out and deliver our finalverdict toxic or non-toxic and
hey, don't just sit in the jurybox.
Listeners, we want to hear yourtake on this too.
Drop your verdicts and let usknow whose side you're on.

(01:29:04):
The first one is the ghostingfriend.
You've been close with a friendfor years, sharing personal
stories, supporting each otherthrough ups and downs.
Suddenly, without explanation,they stop responding to your
texts and calls.
Days turn into weeks and whenyou finally see them in person,

(01:29:25):
they avoid eye contact and actlike nothing is wrong.
See them in person, they avoideye contact and act like nothing
is wrong.
Were there warning signs or didthey vanish out of nowhere?
Is ghosting ever a form ofself-protection or just lazy
conflict avoidance and go.

Speaker 1 (01:29:40):
In my defense.
I feel like, one, they're justlazy and just trying to avoid
conflict.
And two, we've talked aboutthis previously If you're going
to ghost me, at least like giveme an explanation, explanation
why you know, or I mean, I guessthat's part of ghosting, is
that like you don't know whathappened, but like in the

(01:30:01):
sensitive, in the sense of itall, like as a common courtesy,
I feel like you could put me oncheck and tell me what I did
wrong.

Speaker 2 (01:30:08):
You know, especially if you were friends for years
yeah like if you've been friendsfor that long, you shouldn't it
.

Speaker 1 (01:30:16):
It takes a lot of balls to just walk away and be
like I'm done done because noreason no logic, especially when
you're adults yeah, it comes tothe saying of like were we
really friends to begin with you?

Speaker 2 (01:30:28):
know, so yeah, okay, I agree with that.
I I also think that it is aform of lazy conflict avoidance
and, like I said, we're adults.
Just have the conversationperiod.
Tell me if I did somethingwrong.
It is what it is if you don'twant to be friends anymore.

Speaker 1 (01:30:48):
Say it, deuces Tell me yeah, yeah, all right.
So what's the verdict?

Speaker 2 (01:30:53):
My verdict for this is toxic.
Same, 100%, yeah, same, yep.

Speaker 1 (01:30:58):
All right.
My next hypothetical situationis the emotional leech.
You have a friend whoconstantly turns to you for
emotional support.
Every time you meet or talk,they unload their problems,
frustrations and crises, butrarely ask how you're doing or
offer support in return.
Over time, you start to feeldrained, anxious and hesitant to

(01:31:22):
reach out.
Now are they really draining,or are your boundaries just
unclear?
Or do they offer the sameenergy back when you're in a
crisis?
Anthony, go.

Speaker 2 (01:31:38):
I think I will say that I think my boundaries are
clearly unclear.
If they're not seeing part ofthe problem, ok.
If they're not seeing part ofthe problem, okay.
And I do feel that that friendis going to be very draining on
a friendship and on myself inthose instances, because it is a
lot to have to.
I have life too.
I have things that are going on.

(01:31:59):
It's not just you and I dothink that them coming to me
only when they are having theseissues or frustrations or crises
, do they offer the same energyback when I'm in crisis?
Depends on who the friend is,but I think that that's going to

(01:32:20):
play favorably to them.
If it is one of those instancesLike, is it a two-way street
that I can come to you and dothat?
But also I do want to know isthere some sort of substance to
our friendship and to ourrelationship?
If they're only coming to mefor those problems and
frustrations, like we said, okay, what about you?

Speaker 1 (01:32:43):
I feel like clearly the boundaries are unclear,
because you know, likefriendship is a two-way street.
You know, like if I'm thankfulthat you could come to me First
of all, like I'm thankful thatyou feel like you can come to me
when you're vulnerable, whenyou're talking about these kind

(01:33:04):
of things, you know, becauseobviously when you're have
frustrations or stuff like thatand you need support, you know
I'm glad that you think of me asthat person.
To come to you know, but on theflip side is like if that's the
only thing you're coming to mefor validation, then obviously
it's not the same energy because, like as as a friend, like I'm

(01:33:28):
not only coming to you just sothat I could get validated in
these situations.
Because you know, speaking fromexperience, like majority of
the time you know when peoplerant or when they're talking
about their relationship, theywant you to be on their side,
they want you to agree with them.
They want you to confirm thatwhat they're doing is valid,
which you know.
That's what friends are for.
They're there for support.
But at the same time, if that'sall you're coming to me to do

(01:33:51):
is to make sure that I'magreeing with your actions, it
also reflects on like you as aperson, like are you really just
coming to like are you myfriend because you actually
value my input, or are you doingit for your own selfish reasons
, to make sure that you knowthat you're the one in the right
?
you know what I mean yes so tome, like, yeah, I just feel like

(01:34:16):
you can't.
In those kind of scenarios,it's hard for you to get the
same energy back, becausesometimes those people don't see
what they're doing.

Speaker 2 (01:34:27):
Yes, I agree with that.
Yeah, and I think that there'salso those people that will come
in and that they will unloadtheir problem on you.
Trauma dump, trauma dump.
Yeah, and they're only doing it, like you said, for validation.
Yeah, but then they want you togive them the answer that they

(01:34:51):
want.

Speaker 1 (01:34:52):
Exactly.
They only come to you becauseyou will tell them what they
want to hear.
Yes, but then and vice versa,when you don't tell them what
they want to hear.
End of conversation, right.

Speaker 2 (01:35:01):
You know what I mean, then you're the bad guy, yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:35:03):
Or like oh, you don't see where I'm seeing, or you're
not a good friend because youdon't see where I'm coming from,
kind of a thing.

Speaker 2 (01:35:10):
I always wonder.
In those instances, though,when those friends do come to
you and they do their traumadump and then you tell them your
input or your answer and it'snot what they want to hear, and
then they start gettingdefensive and start adding I
always find myself wondering amI missing?
Yeah because, obviously, if Icome to you with the story, I'm

(01:35:33):
going to tell you this, theversion of the story that I want
to tell you.

Speaker 1 (01:35:37):
I will leave bits and I'm not saying I do this well
everybody, everybody does it Iwill leave bits and pieces out
in an effort to sway youropinion, so that you can tell me
what I want to hear yeah,because I think majority of the
time when you ask people forhypotheticals like that first
one that I've ever asked you yes, yeah, I did not think that
through, so no, the outtakes ofepisode one look at us.

(01:36:03):
I don't look at us it's like aago, but yeah.
So I definitely think that, like, when it comes and this is the
real part of it is that, likepeople don't want to admit to it
, but majority of the time, whenthey're asking for advice or
when they're asking for, likewhen they're ranting and they
want to know, like your point ofview or an advice, they do just
want you to tell them what theywant to hear.

(01:36:23):
Yes, 100% yeah.
And when you yeah, when youtell them what you actually feel
or what you actually think.
Those are the friends who youknow that are real, even if they
don't agree with you, because,one, they're trying not to,
they're trying to be neutral,they're trying not to side with
one or the other and, two,they're just telling you as it
is.
And if you can't take it, then,like I don't know, maybe you're

(01:36:45):
the problem, maybe it's youyou're the problem, maybe it's
you, you're the problem.

Speaker 2 (01:36:49):
Yeah, I see what you did there.

Speaker 1 (01:36:50):
Mm-hmm so.

Speaker 2 (01:36:52):
Okay, so the emotional leech.
What's the final verdict?

Speaker 1 (01:36:57):
For me.
I would consider it toxic.
What about you?

Speaker 2 (01:37:03):
I'm torn on the verdict.
Okay.
Only because there are thosecertain questions and certain
factors that can come into play,like is it a two-way street?
Okay, looking and thinkingabout this specific scenario

(01:37:25):
again, we did stress that everytime you meet and talk, they
unload their problems.
So because of that, I'm goingto go with toxic.

Speaker 1 (01:37:30):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:37:31):
It is a toxic relationship Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:37:34):
Do you think there could be another verdict?

Speaker 2 (01:37:37):
Well, I was thinking about that we could introduce at
a later time.
We don't have to do it with anyof these, but we could come up
with a deluded but harmlessverdict.
Okay, but we could come up witha deluded but harmless verdict
which would apply to situationswhere it's not exactly toxic,
but it's still just a littleunhinged or extra.
Okay.
All right.

(01:37:58):
The final scenario the vacationsnub.
You've been planning a groupvacation with your close friends
for months.
Everyone is confirmed and madearrangements, except for one
friend who suddenly says theycan't make it last minute.
Later you find out throughsocial media that they went on a
different trip without tellinganyone, not even you.

(01:38:22):
Do they owe you an invite?
Or are you expecting too much?
Is this a pattern or just onepoorly planned trip and go?

Speaker 1 (01:38:32):
All right.
So for this one I don't knowit's kind of like well, in this
specific scenario, I guess forme it comes to show like for me,
I'm a very big person where Itrust my intuition.
Like, for me, I'm a very bigperson where I trust my
intuition, like, if you show mea certain side of you, I'm going
to go with that and I'm goingto soar with that feeling, like

(01:38:54):
I'm going to stick with it, like, oh, like, if she didn't invite
me, okay, I see where thefriendship lies.
Because, like in the specificscenario, if they already went
on another trip without tellingyou, yeah, like fuck you Because
that's super unfair when, like,if you're going as a group, you

(01:39:16):
plan everything, expenses aredivided.
if you're getting like a burboand like, as an adult, like you
plan stuff, you have to likebudget.
So to me I don't think you'reexpecting too much and I don't
want an invite.
I just see who you are.
As far as if it's a pattern orif it's a poorly planned trip, I
don't really think it's any ofthat.

(01:39:36):
I think it's on the person whodecided to cancel.
Yeah, because, again, like I'vementioned earlier, even like it
can relate to our Florida trip,like you know, we put we plan
months ahead, like the agenda,what to do.
We, you know we have to splitthe cost of the Airbnb cost of
the trip and like, if you can'thold up your end of the bargain,

(01:39:58):
then you know it is what it is.
But let's just say, like,hypothetically, let's say, if
you paid for everything alreadyand you're like, hey, like I
come, I have this other tripthat I have planned, I won't be
able to make it, but y'all goahead and just do what you do
and keep it, then I'd be like,okay, well, she already paid for
her portion, she's pulling herown weight, but she, if she

(01:40:19):
decides to go somewhere else,fine, cool.
But if she's like, oh yeah,like, can I get that money back,
I'm going to be like no bitch.
I'm going to be petty, like youplanned this, besides the point
that you already knew you weregoing on this other trip, you
know, yeah, and that's justplain shitty.

Speaker 2 (01:40:36):
I think it's the last minute part.
That is really shitty.
Like planned it for months.
If you had told me three monthsago that you were going to, you
didn't want to go and you weregonna do something else, yeah,
maybe we would I would havegiven you your money back, yeah,

(01:40:56):
but yeah, I'm the same way.
Yeah, I don't it.
Months of planning.
You can't just last minute bailout on it and expect a full
refund and for no feelings to behurt, especially when you're
going with multiple people andit does affect the price that
people have to pay and, like yousaid, people budget.
So like, okay, now she's out,now that's an extra 200 bucks
out of my pocket and everybody'spocket.

Speaker 1 (01:41:15):
Yeah, that we didn't account for and the thing, too
is that like, let's say, ifyou're doing an airbnb or a
hotel, like if the number ofguests matters, and if you, in
addition to that, made adifference in the price yeah,
I'm going to be pissed.

Speaker 2 (01:41:27):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:41:28):
Like, let's say 100%.
Yeah, if it was two people,okay fine, but if it was three
people and you're the thirdperson to cancel out, or if it
was like three people and youwere the fourth person, it does
change the price and hotel costs.

Speaker 2 (01:41:40):
Yeah, you know so yeah, it can be drastic in price
.

Speaker 1 (01:41:43):
Mm, mm-hmm, oops, mm-hmm, yeah, so and Sorry, I
was having issues.
Okay, well, anthony, what?
Is your verdict on this.

Speaker 2 (01:41:57):
Because this was planned months in advance and it
was a last-minute pull-outdecision.
This is toxic behavior, dingding.

Speaker 1 (01:42:05):
You was right.
We is right, you was right.

Speaker 2 (01:42:08):
We is right.

Speaker 1 (01:42:09):
You was right.
All right, you remember how Itold you that I had something
scary to tell you right?

Speaker 2 (01:42:13):
Yeah, from your Florida trip.

Speaker 1 (01:42:15):
Yeah, Well, I have a story for you.
I didn't say anything becauseobviously I had an amazing time
in Florida, but this was inregards to the Airbnb.
Like I experienced some scarystuff.

Speaker 2 (01:42:34):
So yeah, the airbnb.
Like I experienced some scarystuff.
So yeah, here goes my story.
Is this a?

Speaker 1 (01:42:37):
scary story.
Do I need to like?
This is a brace myself I'm.
It's a scary story for me.
So I mean, if you don't likescary stories, y'all could skip
it.
But I feel like some peoplemight like scary stories.

Speaker 2 (01:42:44):
So I'm doesn't like a scary story, you're right,
right.

Speaker 1 (01:42:47):
Someone tell them my perspective, anyways, so you
remember, the last time wetalked I told you that something
scary happened and I was goingto tell you after the episode.

Speaker 2 (01:42:57):
Yeah, from your trip to Florida.

Speaker 1 (01:42:58):
Yeah, yes, well, I thought I'd share it on the air
live.
I didn't talk about thisbecause at that time I didn't
get about this, because, like atthat time, I didn't get like
confirmation from it.
So since then I did get someconfirmation.

Speaker 2 (01:43:16):
So You're about to tell me there was like a dead
body there the entire time.

Speaker 1 (01:43:20):
No, no, no, no, no, Not dead, but you know.
Anyways.
Well, when we arrived I don'tknow what that means when we
arrived at the Airbnb, it lookednice.
You know, it was a three levelhome, Like I mentioned before.
You know, everything was veryclean, very airy, very bright.
Well, at least the first twofloors were, but the third floor

(01:43:41):
that I slept on, like themoment that I got there it just
felt kind of off, it was kind ofcreepy, but I just kind of like
brush it off.

Speaker 2 (01:43:50):
So okay.
So I have to ask so was it likeyou like, went upstairs and
then as soon as you hit thethird floor, it was just like a
shift.
It's kind of like boom In theatmosphere.
Yeah, kind of Because, like thesecond, I already know where
the story is going.

Speaker 1 (01:44:05):
The second, oh, first floor like it was renovated so
it was like really new, reallybright, there's big windows and
everything.
But when we were upstairs, likethere was a big, because every
room has like a porch area, butupstairs the door, the curtains
was a little bit darker, theroom was a little bit darker.
They had like little gamestations set up but that didn't

(01:44:26):
really brighten anything.
It just kind of like, like,feel kind of creepy.
This is like flowers in theattic right now.

Speaker 2 (01:44:34):
I've never seen that.
Oh, oh, my god, is it a scarystory?
it's not a scary story, but it'slike it's about I feel like
you've talked about this to mebefore maybe yeah, it's with
heather, heather, graham andlike she's oh god, she's a
horrible actress, but her kidslike go, they have to live with
their grandparents and her andthe grandma like hates the kids
and like locks them up in theattic and like it's a big, rich

(01:44:55):
family, like estate property,but they have to stay in the
attic, which is all dusty andspidery.
Ew, like spoiler alert, she waslike poisoning the kids the
entire time.

Speaker 1 (01:45:05):
Oh, my fucking God, yeah, ooh, I'd want to watch
that.

Speaker 2 (01:45:08):
That's something I'd be they weren't allowed like any
and it was like a full series.
There was like Flowers in theAttic, and then there was
another sequel and anothersequel and it was like the kids
growing up.
Is this like a movie or is thislike?
I think it's like a Lifetimemovie or some shit like that.
Ooh, that sounds interesting.
I mean, I'd want to watch it.

Speaker 1 (01:45:24):
But anyways, yeah, well, pretty much like the
moment I got to the third floor,like you know, it felt really
subtle but heavy.
You know, the air had thickenedand it was just really like, I
guess, like really it wasn'tlike bad energy, but it's just
kind of like dark energy, likeit was like really heavy Hell to
the no, spooky energy, I shouldsay.

(01:45:45):
But anyways, our room was liketo the left of the stairs on the
third floor and then it wasjust a simple bed, it was a bunk
bed, so there's a top bunk,bottom bunk, but then if you
look up above, it shows thesquare panel above the bed where
you could go up to the attic.

Speaker 2 (01:46:07):
Wait, so there was another floor above this floor.
Well, the attic was above this.
Yes, oh okay, I thought thethird floor was the attic.

Speaker 1 (01:46:14):
No, so there's the, so the third floor is the one
where that we're sleeping, butthe room that we slept in
there's just like a simplesquare panel above the bed that,
like you, could enter to go upto the attic yeah so it was
obviously kind of creepy butlike I just kind of like brushed
it off.
But at that time we just gotthere so I like dropped the bag,

(01:46:34):
shrugged off the eerie feelingand I just went about the night.
But that first night like Icouldn't shake off the feeling
that like I was being watched orlike there was a little bit
more to just me Were you on thetop bunk.
No, I was on the bottom bunk,but still like it was.
It was still really creepy butbore.
I've mentioned her.
She's one of my best friends.

(01:46:55):
She was sleeping with me and sheslept on the top bunk because,
you know, I'm a I'm a chubbygirl and she's much smaller than
me.
So then I'm like I don't wantto wake up in the middle of the
night and know that I'm on topof you because the bed done
broke, you know.
So I told her to just go sleepon the top bunk, but she like
hated it.
Like every time she went shelike climbed up the stairs.

(01:47:16):
You'd hear her groaning andbeing like, oh, I hate climbing
up these stairs, or like,because it was also really
really tight too, like thestairs was like the size for
like a kid, but it's like on theend of the bed, all the way to
like the left side of the end ofthe bed, so it was like really
tiny.
So then I was like, yeah, well,my fat ass is not going to be
sleeping up there because Imight crush you.

Speaker 2 (01:47:37):
Couldn't you guys have just snuggled on the bottom
bunk together?

Speaker 1 (01:47:40):
Well, yeah, but then I love you Bored, but that bitch
snores Like it ain't quiet.
It's you bore, but that bitchsnores like it ain't quiet, it's
like I make fun of her, of howshe snores, but I love her.

Speaker 2 (01:47:52):
It's all love.

Speaker 1 (01:47:53):
This is why I don't tell people I snore, but anyways
, you know, I, like I said, Icouldn't shake off the feeling
that I was being watched,especially like when I was alone
in the room, like I felt like Iwas being watched.
But when Bor was in the roomwith me, like I still felt like
I was being watched, but not asmuch Like the feeling, like you

(01:48:13):
know, when somebody's there incompany with you.

Speaker 2 (01:48:15):
You don't have that feeling Someone's like over your
shoulder.

Speaker 1 (01:48:16):
You can tell.
So again, bor was who I wassharing the room with At the
first night, like she didn'tcome to sleep till later because
, like I mentioned, I went tosleep so that I could go and see
the sunrise.
So you know, I, when I wentupstairs, you know I kind of
felt creeped out.
So then, you know, I just hadlike a very unsettling feeling.
So I had called B to talk to meso that I could fall asleep.

(01:48:39):
I mean, I didn't want to admitit but I was scared.
But after he hung up, you know,I was just like, okay, well, I
have to use some white noise atleast for me to fall asleep.
So you know, obviously I putsome friends on in the back for
background noise.

Speaker 2 (01:48:55):
Your go-to background noise.

Speaker 1 (01:48:57):
I put friends on and so then I was able to like fall
asleep for a couple of hours,but at the same time, like I'm
also a very like one, a verypicky person when it comes to
beds, like, if it's not my bed,I can't.
At the same time, like I'm alsoa very like one, a very picky
person when it comes to beds,like, if it's not my bed, I
can't fall asleep.
And two, I'm a light sleeper.
So like, if anything happens,like I'd wake up.
So obviously, like I mentioned,I knew that Bore came and slept

(01:49:18):
later, like in the story I toldpreviously, I heard her
climbing up and like her drunkself climbing up to sleep.
So, anyways, I didn't mentionanything to anybody because I,
you know, initially I was like,okay, maybe I'm overthinking,
like you know, it's not, it'sall in my head, because clearly
all the other girls they weren't, they didn't seem to be feeling
that energy.

(01:49:38):
So I was like, okay, whatever.
But then it started happening.
You know, the door.
Like, yeah, the door.
Like I noticed the littlethings about the door.
The door, like what?
Yeah, the door.
Like I noticed little thingsabout the door.
So I began to notice that, likeevery time I was alone in the
room, the door would slowlyclose by itself, like I'd leave
it open, go about my business,change whatever, but then, like

(01:50:01):
moments later, like the doorwould just close and the reason
why, like the reason why I knowit closes because obviously I'd
leave the door open, and thenyou'd hear it like you hear it
slowly click, you know, likewhen the door closes so it
wouldn't do that when bore oranybody else was in the room
with you no, no.

(01:50:22):
So like when bore was in theroom with me, like the door
stays open, like every singletime, I, low-key, became like
hyper fixated on payingattention to the door because,
like it's just, I don't know,it's just those things where,
like you don't notice it untilyou actually start noticing
right.
So to me, like it was reallysmall, but you know again, like

(01:50:43):
once I started noticing it, Ijust couldn't stop.
So then, like I was like, okay,this pattern's a little too
exact, it's a little too precise, like I don't know what's going
on.
So then I started testing it.
On the second night we cameback from the pool at the Airbnb
.
I was tired, you know, I wasready to shower, freshen up,
because we were going to go backdownstairs and cook dinner, and

(01:51:09):
so then, once again, you know,I left the door wide open and I
made I made a point to keep itwide open.
And so then what happened was Ijust wanted to see if it was
like in my head.
Like I said, I was kind oftesting it.
So then I was just like, okay,we'll just, I'll just wait and
see, see how this goes.
But then I had to go shower.
So I left to go shower.
And then I heard Bore likeclimbing up the stairs.
And again we're on the thirdfloor and these weren't like

(01:51:30):
short, two, three steps stairs,these like fucking 20 steps of
floors like stairs.
So then I hear Bore huffing andpuffing you know, brief voice
will do that to anybody, cause Iwas doing the same thing too,
you know and so then I openedthe door and I asked her like
she needed to use the bathroom,but like I didn't realize how
close she was to the door, soshe kind of scared me a little

(01:51:50):
bit.
And so then when I was likewhoa, like I didn't see you
there At that exact moment, thedoor slammed and remember, I
told you like I left it open fora reason Like before I left, to
go to use the bathroom or to goshower.
I left it open.

Speaker 2 (01:52:06):
So are you saying it like slam slammed or like it
just closed?

Speaker 1 (01:52:09):
Well, it didn't go boom, but like it's like if
somebody went in there and theylike actually pushed it to close
.

Speaker 2 (01:52:15):
So it was like forcible, yeah, like an audible
forcible noise.

Speaker 1 (01:52:18):
And the thing too is that there was no air
conditioning, no open windows,no air blowing, so there was
like no explanation.
The only thing was that thebride sister, selena like that
night there were other girlsthat was arriving that same day
too.
So we were trying to figure outlike sleeping situations.

(01:52:39):
So I told her that, oh, likeyou could just share a bed with
me, and so she had her suitcasein there already.
So then I thought it was Selena.
So I'm like, oh, like, maybeit's Selena.
So me and Bordeaux was like,okay, well, she has to go change
, she has to go get her clothestoo, to go shower, and obviously
I had to bring my clothes backto the room.
So we both went and opened thedoor and the room was empty,

(01:52:59):
like dead silent, no one insight.
But we were just like, okay,whatever, I think at that time
Bordeaux didn't think too muchabout it, but again I was kind
of testing it a little bit.
So then at this point, again,like I said, I became like hyper
fixated on the door.
So I like watched over it likeobsessively.
So again, anytime Bo and I wereboth in the room, it stayed open

(01:53:23):
.
Then the moment she left, likethe moment when I was alone, you
know, it slowly like wouldclose again.
So I was just trying to likeremind myself that like OK,
either one this is happening toooften and like it's too
coincidental, or whatever.
But then, you know, it justkept reminding me that maybe I

(01:53:44):
wasn't really alone in the roombecause, again, every time I was
in the room I like felt freakedout or whatever.
So every night that we spentthere I had to turn on friends
to kind of like put me to sleep,to play white noise or whatever
.
So then on our last day, whilewe were waiting at the airport,
one of the bride's sister hadcasually asked like if anybody

(01:54:05):
experienced anything,particularly like anything
paranormal at the Airbnb,because sometimes like no, no,
no no no, no, but because, like,sometimes, like I do have,
obviously I have I have thisother story that happened, also
at an Airbnb, but it's inMilwaukee, maybe I'll save that

(01:54:25):
for another day.
And yeah, like, if you guys haveany scary stories, please like
send them my way.
Like I love scary stories.
Obviously I don't likeexperiencing scary shit, but I
love scary stories.
But anyways, she asked if, likeanything paranormal happened,
like all the girls that justkind of like laughed, shook
their heads, they were like nope, slept fine, slept like a baby.

(01:54:46):
You know, I kind of hesitatedbut then I still kind of like
spoke on, I uh, no, go ahead.
I'll ask after go ahead okay,well, anyways, I I was kind of
hesitant but because I was likethe only one who experienced
that, so I wasn't sure.
But I spoke up anyways and Iwas like, yeah, well, you know,
I decided to tell them that Inoticed that the store, the door

(01:55:07):
, would like close when I was inby myself, but obviously when
war was there, like it wouldstay open and it just kind of
felt strange in the room and itwas kind of weird how, like you
know, it only happened when Iwas there, so low-key, I kind of
felt like I was going crazy,like maybe it was all in my head
.
So they just kind of likepolitely smiled.
They're like, oh, yeah, youknow, maybe it is in your head.

(01:55:27):
So then I let it go because I'mlike, okay, maybe it is in my
head because, like I said, noneof the girls felt it, even bore
who slept in the room with medidn't feel it.
So I'm like, okay, yeah, if shedidn't double confirm it for me
, then I was just like, fine,it's whatever.
But then a few weeks later,after the bachelorette party the

(01:55:49):
bride had had, you know, I hadgone to her house, I went to
visit her and she had told methat she'd spoken with a few of
the girls who hadn't joined theairport chat when we're talking
about it.
You know these girls are muchquieter but then they are a
little bit more sensitive tolike this kind of energy.
And what they told me had mefucking floored.
Like I was fucking.
I had chills in my spine, likeI legit felt sick after she told

(01:56:13):
me the story did they seesomething?
yes, they did so, shut up yeah,so what happened was one of the
girls she had seen a blackfigure like a shadow, like
walking up and down the stairs,like she said she would see it
move like slowly throughout thethe rooms on every floor and

(01:56:35):
they would like.
At the time, at the time whenwe were like downstairs cooking
and playing games, like she saidthat you know, she could see
that black figure kind of goingup and down the stairs or
whatever, while we were playinggames.
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (01:56:51):
Okay, I have to ask.

Speaker 1 (01:56:51):
Okay.

Speaker 2 (01:56:54):
Was everybody in your party?
Were they Hmong?

Speaker 1 (01:56:56):
Yeah, all the girls there are Hmong.

Speaker 2 (01:56:58):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:56:58):
Yeah, no, but the thing is two of these girls that
went with us they are moresensitive, like I said, to that
stuff and they both saw this.
They both saw like the darkshadow kind of like going up and
down the stairs checking everyroom and like, checking the room
, yeah, like she would go into,supposedly she would check the

(01:57:18):
rooms out or something like thatis what they said.
I don't know word for word, butthis is just what the bride
told me.
But anyways, one girl in one ofthe two that are sensitive to
like these kind of things, shesaid that she saw someone.
Her experience was like I thinkshe was downstairs cooking and
she had saw someone walk intothe laundry room, and this on

(01:57:40):
the first floor, and she wasthinking that it was one of the
sisters that was there.
So she followed them into thelaundry room, only to find out
that it was like completelyempty.
And she was like I swear to god, I saw somebody walk into this
room because she was kind oftalking to them like they were
conversating, like she wassaying her obviously talking to
the person that she saw, whichis actually nobody yeah, it was

(01:58:00):
nobody.
but then she, what night wasthis on?
This was probably the secondnight, because we were cooking
there on the second night.
And then the same girl.
She had told the bride thatevery night she would see the
shadow again, like standing bythe bedroom door, like she's
just standing there watching,not moving, not speaking, but

(01:58:25):
like every night she was alwaysthere.

Speaker 2 (01:58:27):
Fuck that.
No, I would have been out ofthere so fast.

Speaker 1 (01:58:32):
I mean, we had nowhere to go.
It's an Airbnb, it's out oftown, no.

Speaker 2 (01:58:35):
I would write that the owner ought to be like
listen, dude, sorry we got tobreak this and you could have
claimed religious beliefs, Iprobably could have?

Speaker 1 (01:58:43):
I probably could have , well, okay.

Speaker 2 (01:58:50):
The reason I asked if everybody in the party was
Hmong was because we had talkedbefore and you said that Hmongs
have like a lot of superstitions.
Yeah, they do, they do, yeah,so like first sight of some sort
of spirit scaring the shit outof me.
I would have been like deuces,I guess.
This is a religion, religiousexception.
I need out of this contract.
I need a new Airbnb new airbnb.

Speaker 1 (01:59:04):
Okay well, we didn't think of it like that, because
the thing too is that, likeagain, they kind of kept it hush
, hush because they didn't wantto scare anybody, but like, but
again, I found this out weekslater.
I think if at the time I foundout, or, like you know, if I
found out I probably would havegotten just, I would have just
got my own hotel room and beenlike, done, but brave anyways,

(01:59:27):
yeah, she was just saying thatlike she would see her like
every night and this figureshadow, like she couldn't see a
face, but it's just like a darkfigure.
And so then, coincidentally,like she said that like their
room was like the coldest roomout of the whole, like airbnb,
like every night it was likereally, really cold and they

(01:59:47):
always like had to have blanketson.
Mind you, it's in Florida, soit's fuck as hot.
You know, yeah, it's hot asfuck.
I mean, it's hot as fuck.
It's not fucking as hot, it'shot.

Speaker 2 (01:59:56):
I don't know shit about fuck.

Speaker 1 (01:59:57):
I don't know shit about fuck, but yeah and so then
.
But she did also mention thatyou know the shadow.
It didn't just roam like, itlingered, and mostly like it's.
It was stayed on the thirdfloor and possibly majority of
the time it was in our in theroom that I slept in.

Speaker 2 (02:00:18):
So, yeah, you better hope no spirit didn't like
invade your body.
Travel back to wisconsin withyou bitch.

Speaker 1 (02:00:25):
But I don't think so.
I mean, obviously nothinghappened like I think at that
time we were just kind of likeoblivious to it.
But then, like after findingout the fact, I mean I would
have had appreciated because,like downstairs there's like two
really big comfy couches andthey're like recliner couches.
I think it would have been niceif they're, if they saw that,

(02:00:45):
if they could just have beenlike, hey, like it's on the
third floor I know you guys aretired climbing the stairs, why
don't you guys just sleepdownstairs?
If they had said that, I wouldhave gotten the hint and I would
have allowed it.
I would have been fine with it,because the thing too is that,
like the third floor, thebathroom and the sink were so
shitty and the like the tub,like the shower thing was like

(02:01:08):
it was kind of broken, like itwas a glass sheet and the glass
sheet had like a door, a glassdoor.
Excuse me, but if you likeclose it too hard, it would like
indent in.
So then it would feel like oneof the glass could possibly tip
over and break and the toiletyou'd have to manually like open
the back thing and reach in.

Speaker 2 (02:01:28):
This is some like destination shit.
I don't know.
The universe was setting you up.

Speaker 1 (02:01:31):
You lucky to be alive no, like I I kept mentioning to
everybody at the airbnb I'mlike y'all, don't use the third
bathroom, like it's broken.
The sink works, that's the onlything, but the toilet sucks,
like the shower sucks.
So I'm just like, yeah, butanyways, that was my ordeal,
like I think, when they didn'tsay anything or they didn't
confirm anything, I think it wasfine.

(02:01:53):
But when, like, the bride toldme, I was like bitch, I fucking
knew it.

Speaker 2 (02:01:57):
Like y'all why didn't nobody say anything when you
were at the airport afterwards?

Speaker 1 (02:02:02):
no, because I told you because the two girls, they
weren't there, they weren't inpart of that conversation, so
they didn't say anything.
Oh, I misunderstood.
I thought it was a text chat.
No, this was this was at theairport we were waiting we were
waiting at the airport becausewe had like I think we have like
I don't know, we got there at12 and our flight was in our
five, so we were there for likefive hours and we're like kind

(02:02:23):
of talking about it.
And so then they're like, oh,you know, the two girls that was
there, they didn't.
They had to go check in becausethey had different like seats
compared to all the other girls,so then they weren't part of
the conversation at the airport.
So then obviously they're moresensitive and so then they had
messaged each other on their own.
And then that's when the girlhad messaged the bride and let

(02:02:44):
her know that hey, like this iswhat happened.
But yeah, like when she told meI had like full body chills, I
legit was like I'm sick, I needto go home I don't know how you
guys did it.

Speaker 2 (02:02:54):
I don't think that I've ever really experienced
anything like that, but like Idefinitely have like a, if I go
into a room, a situation, ascenario, a party, whatever it
is, and there's a certain vibe,I do what I can to like get out
of there, get the fuck out ofthere.

Speaker 1 (02:03:09):
Yeah, I think for me again, like this is like for me,
like if they like if I don'tknow how to say it but now that
I know that, like I've alwaysknown, I've kind of been
sensitive, like I have thosefeelings too where, like if I
enter a house, if I enter a roomand I'm like like it's kind of
creepy right that's the samefeeling I felt when we were

(02:03:30):
there, but I didn't like followit, because everybody was like,
oh yeah, I wasn't scared, it wasfine, and also, on top of that,
like there was a lot of peoplethere.
So I didn't think that I waslike, oh, I have company, like I
I'm not gonna be scared.
Because it's kind of no it'skind of the same thing that
happened at the Milwaukee Airbnb, but that's I'll tell for

(02:03:50):
another story.
If you guys want to hear aboutit, you know I'll probably tell
it.
But yeah, that was my scaryhappenings at the Airbnb.
But yeah.

Speaker 2 (02:04:03):
More power to you, I wouldn't have been able to do it
.

Speaker 1 (02:04:07):
Yeah, I don't know.
I mean obviously because therewas like 14 of us the house was,
it was loud, like we were doingstuff everywhere.
It was only like little bitsand moments, but then like if
there was only like five of usthere and I was the only one
sleeping on the third floor,yeah, bitch bye okay, so I know
that you're a little bit of aclingy asshole okay just kidding
rude well, I'm getting up to it, but I'm sure that you're a

(02:04:27):
little bit of a clingy asshole.

Speaker 2 (02:04:27):
Okay, rude, well, I'm getting up to it.
But I'm sure that you called blike every day, didn't you?
Did you say anything to himwhen you talked to him?

Speaker 1 (02:04:33):
no, because I didn't want to like freak myself out,
and b is those type of littlehoes that would purposely scare
me.
He would be like, oh, did youhear that he'd do that shit to
me?
So no, I wasn't gonna sayanything, I just told him can
you please just like stay on theline with me until I fall
asleep and legit every night.

(02:04:54):
It'd be like five minutes andthen he'd hang up, you fall
asleep in five minutes no, hewould think that I'm asleep and
he would hang up in like fiveminutes and then you were on the
phone with him, but you weren'ttalking yeah, because I was
trying.
How's he supposed to know ifyou're?

Speaker 2 (02:05:05):
asleep or awake?

Speaker 1 (02:05:06):
I was trying to go to sleep.
I just just knowing that he wasthere in company, I was a
little bit more comforted.
But then, like the moment hewas like, okay, you're asleep,
he'd hang up.
So I'm like, bitch, it's onlybeen like five minutes.
But then I'm like, okay, thatwas already my cue, that he's
like gonna go do his own thing.
So then that's when I turned onfriends and and I'm like, okay,
I got to like put on some whitenoise, you know.

(02:05:28):
So yeah.

Speaker 2 (02:05:30):
Why can't it be black noise?

Speaker 1 (02:05:34):
It could be black noise.
I'm kidding Bitch.

Speaker 2 (02:05:37):
Did you ever watch the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air?

Speaker 1 (02:05:40):
No, okay.
But, yeah, we ain't trying totalk about race here.
This is black and white.

Speaker 2 (02:05:49):
This is ghost and white.
Okay, ghost and white, exactlyghost so but I wouldn't have
taken that lightly, I couldn'thave done it.
Yeah, like if I had that muchof a vibe I would have been like
nope okay, yeah, I'm the dumbbitch.

Speaker 1 (02:06:01):
I was obviously like, yeah.
Again I was like, oh, if nobodywas feeling it then it's
probably nothing, but this istoo much of a coincidence.
I've had things like thishappen to me, like I said in the
past, so I think at this pointthat's just confirmation for me
personally that you need tolisten to this stuff.

(02:06:21):
Yes, that I need to listen tomy feelings and I need to stick
with my intuition.

Speaker 2 (02:06:24):
Intuition is a real thing.
Yeah, I know that Some peoplehave it, some with my intuition,
intuition's a real thing.

Speaker 1 (02:06:29):
Yeah, I know that, and some people have it, some
people don't.
Yeah, it's like common sense, Idon't have common sense.

Speaker 2 (02:06:33):
Yes, you do.

Speaker 1 (02:06:33):
I'm more book smart than I am street smart.
Okay, Bitch.

Speaker 2 (02:06:38):
I hate you, I'm just kidding.
Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you.
Aside from seeing this thing,did those other girls like they
didn't experience anything.

Speaker 1 (02:06:49):
No, it was just the three of us, bye.
Yeah, if it was just me, Iprobably would have been like
okay again, it was probablynothing.
But like I said, when the twoof them confirmed, I'm like I
told y'all bitches, y'all didn'tfucking listen to me see again.

Speaker 2 (02:07:04):
This is why I asked if they were mung, because you
said that mungs are likesuperstitious.
So like if I was Hmong and Iwas superstitious and I was on a
girl's trip weekend at anAirbnb and I saw a fucking
hooded shadow figure roaming thefucking halls no, I ain't going
to be like, oh, let's hang outfor a week.
So who are your friends thatsaw this?
Can we say their names or no?

Speaker 1 (02:07:26):
No, we can't Okay.
Well, if they are listening tothis podcast.

Speaker 2 (02:07:30):
you girls?
I ain't got time for that shit.
I'm calling you out right now.
Uh-uh, you open your mouth, youpack up your bags and you get
that goddamn Uber.
If you got to sit on the curbfor two hours until it gets
there, you sit on the curb withyour luggage.

Speaker 1 (02:07:45):
Yeah, that's what we're gonna do next time.
Bye, but yeah, that's my scarystory.
Now let's get back on track.
On track.
Well, if adult friendships arehard, it's not just you.

Speaker 2 (02:08:01):
We're all here juggling calendars, avoiding
calls and praying someonecancels plans first but deep
down we're still that emotional11-year-old hoping someone picks
us for the group project or thegroup chat.

Speaker 1 (02:08:15):
So text that one friend you miss and say, hey, I
still love you, even if we'reboth emotionally unavailable on
weekdays.
That's real.

Speaker 2 (02:08:24):
And if today got a little too emotional, don't
worry.
Next week we're flipping thevibe completely.

Speaker 1 (02:08:31):
Ranch Corner is back, baby.
We're talking pet peeves, thebig, the petty and the
straight-up irrational.

Speaker 2 (02:08:39):
People who walk slow in airports, friends who only
text what you doing at 11.47pm,that one coworker who breathes
loud Nobody's safe.

Speaker 1 (02:08:50):
It's a safe space to be judgmental.
So if you've got petty gripe ora public call-out that's been
sitting on your soul, slide intoour DMs.
Poe.

Speaker 2 (02:09:02):
Follow us at Twin Tangents Pod and drop your
biggest pet peeves.
The pettier the better.
We'll spiral with you.

Speaker 1 (02:09:09):
Until then, stay loyal, stay loud and, for the
love of adulting, return thegroup text energy you expect,
please, amen, bye, bye you.

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