Skittles, Sugar Daddies, & the Dating Spectrum ft. Stephani - Ep.091

Special thanks to Stephani for being a part of this episode of Unattainable Podcast Show 

We dive deep into modern dating standards and relationship expectations with content creator Stephani Nicole. Our conversation explores the challenges of finding partners who balance maturity with excitement, and the shifting priorities as we age.

• The struggle to find partners who are both mature and fun
• How pheromonal attraction plays a crucial role in relationship sustainability
• Shifting gender roles and expectations around financial responsibilities in relationships
• Dating preferences across different age groups and how they evolve over time
• The importance of emotional and social intelligence in potential partners
• Why connection alone isn't enough to sustain long-term relationships
• Setting clear standards in dating while recognizing your own value
• The balance between independence and interdependence in healthy relationships
• Cultural differences in dating between Midwest and coastal cities

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
I want a guy that's like a little broken in.
You know what I mean.
He needs to like have a topsheet, like have more than one
pillow on his back.
I like want to be inrelationships with women more,
but I feel like it is like morethere's more drama there with
women.

Speaker 2 (00:14):
It's very difficult to find mature and fun.
Usually it's either nice andboring.

Speaker 1 (00:20):
I'm not dating a guy that like has like three
roommates.
I think it comes down to a lotof times I don't know if this is
, like true with you, but like Ithink a lot of times people
underestimate how, likeimportant pheromonal attraction
is.

Speaker 2 (00:32):
I want to date somebody that I have a very
strong connection with, but Iwant to still have the
polarizing aspect that makes meattractive to that person.

Speaker 1 (00:40):
I guess transactional could be a word, because I even
feel like people in marriagesare like that too, where they
just know like hey, he's doingthis for me, that, like this is
his role, this is my role,liking someone only for the
connection is also a trap,because the reality is,
connection comes and goes too.
Just as far as looks go taller,hispanic views is tattooed.

Speaker 2 (01:03):
Welcome to unattainable glad to have you
with us.
First of all, thank you to allof our listeners.
We have been getting someexplosive growth over the last
couple of weeks, so we have tothank all of you guys out there
for that.
Today we've got a special gueston the show.
This is Stephanie.
Stephanie, why don't you goahead and introduce yourself to
the audience, name what you doand your star sign?

Speaker 1 (01:23):
everyone.
I'm Stephanie Nicole.
My handles are at Stephanie inreal life and at ringleader
Stephanie.
I'm currently doing contentcreation and a small business
owner.
Oh, and I'm a Sagittarius, sodo with that what you will.

Speaker 2 (01:38):
It's going to be a long episode.

Speaker 1 (01:40):
What's your sign?

Speaker 2 (01:41):
What do you think?
It is?
Nobody guesses mine.

Speaker 1 (01:45):
I kind of hate my sign, to be honest.
Oh are you?
How did you know?
Oh, wow, I usually um are youan empath.

Speaker 2 (01:50):
You can just read people uh, I'll pretend I am.
No, I'm just kidding if I see,I identify as a leo, which is my
rising okay pisces are such crybabies oh, my girlfriend broke
up with me.
Wah, wah, wah.

Speaker 1 (02:05):
I feel like the least popular two male signs are male
Pisces and male Gemini,although I'd love to know in the
comments if that's true or ifthat's just my experience, I
mean.

Speaker 2 (02:13):
Gemini's are by far the most toxic.
I didn't even believe in signsuntil I started meeting Gemini's
and I was like, wait a second,there might be some truth to
this shit there.

Speaker 1 (02:22):
There might be some truth to this shit.

Speaker 2 (02:23):
There might be, but Sagittarius is probably one of
the most toxic.
I mean you guys are up there.
I have a couple of interestingexperiences close relationships
with Sages that never end well,for some reason.
What's the worst one?
So I've only got a drink thrownin my face twice.

Speaker 1 (02:41):
Only twice.
Yeah, only twice, both.

Speaker 2 (02:43):
Of them were from your people.
People, yeah, thrown in my facetwice, only twice.
Both of them were from yourpeople.
So yeah, um, the first one,this one, was my fault.
So so I'm used to be very toxic.
Back in my villain era, I'mlike recovering fuckboy now I'm
very and by the way, not likethe amateur gen z fuckboys you
see nowadays like a professionalfuckboy not just the fashion of

(03:05):
it.

Speaker 1 (03:06):
How?

Speaker 2 (03:06):
do you, you guys, fall for these dudes that have a
bed that touches two walls?
I'm like do you not know what anightstand is?

Speaker 1 (03:14):
stop dating these losers I know and I say this to
my girlfriends now like I want aguy that's like a little broken
in.
You know what I mean.
He needs to like have a topsheet, like have more than one
pillow on his bed like.

Speaker 2 (03:25):
It's very rare nowadays to find this new breed
of dudes.
It's a different breed yeah,it's scary out there do you uh
find yourself in toxicrelationships, often um?

Speaker 1 (03:37):
uh, so I'm bisexual, so I kind of like keep it
interesting, like with like guysand girls, I guess, um, I, I
like want to be in relationshipswith women more, but I feel
like it is like more there'smore drama there with women, um,
but yeah, like it's um okay.

(03:58):
Craziest for me is like someonewas trying to like argue with
me and I was like, hey, like Idon't want to argue, can you
just like take me home?
And they're like no, I'm gonnapull over on the side of the
highway right now and finish theconversation with you instead
of driving you home.
And I was just like, dude, Ican't even like get out of the
car and take an uber.
Right now I'm on the side ofthe highway, um, but yeah, keeps

(04:20):
it pretty spicy.
I guess, if you like toxicpeople, do I people, do, all of
us at this point in our lives,if you're not ready to get
married, do you want a normal,stable, boring type of situation
or do you want a little extrasomething?

Speaker 2 (04:35):
That's the thing.
It's very difficult to findmature and fun.
Usually it's either nice andboring, like Wisconsin where I'm
from.
Usually it's either nice andboring, like Wisconsin where I'm
from, or it's super fucking funand fucking toxic at the same
time Rollercoaster.

Speaker 1 (04:53):
Yeah, it's true.
I guess like for me, I feellike a lot of times like being
more crazy, being more toxic.
I feel like a part of it islike unstable, it keeps it
interesting.
But I feel like also like ifyou're overthinking about me,
you're worried about me andstuff like that, like it is like
not a sign of intelligence, butyou know what I mean how old

(05:18):
are you?

Speaker 2 (05:18):
you're?

Speaker 1 (05:18):
you're very confusing oh no, shoot, I'm 26.

Speaker 2 (05:24):
Interesting.

Speaker 1 (05:25):
I know I'm a little older.

Speaker 2 (05:26):
I feel like I would have said like 31 in personality
.
You look like you're like 20with a fake ID.
I don't know whether to liketalk about business and
investing or like doing Molly atDisneyland.
It's very confusing.

Speaker 1 (05:40):
I mean that's what's great about me is we can really
do both.
I mean, I'm not much of aDisney person, but yeah, no, we
can go business.
We can go, you know, houseparties either way, but yeah, no
.
I feel like that is a thingwhere I look younger, but yeah,
when I start talking, people arelike oh, you're not that young.
And I'm like damn it.

Speaker 2 (06:00):
So you get that a lot .

Speaker 1 (06:01):
You're kind of grew up fast for your age, a little
more intelligent than yeah, Idefinitely I mean, I like to
think so at least, but maybe I'mjust more talkative and it
sounds more intelligent.
I don't know you're like I'mreally good at faking it yeah, I
mean, um, actually speaking oflike the whole fake it to make
it thing.
Do you remember that inventinganna show and that girl?

(06:24):
no, shoot, okay, I don't watchmuch tv anyways, it was a show
about this girl in real life whobasically like swindled all of
the like elite in new york andwas like really I did hear about
that, yeah and so for somereason, I was like getting ready
and this 60 minutes austutesAustralia episode of her came up
and I was almost like impressedat how like unapologetic she

(06:49):
was and also like I didn't findher to be like profoundly
intelligent, which I would haveassumed she was by that show.
Like, oh my God, she tricked allof these people and she was
like no, like it's not reallyhard.
A lot of these people likearen't smart either and I was
like, oh, wow, like it's crazy.
Sometimes you like think, basedon what people are doing or
where they're at in life, thatthey must be like so much

(07:10):
smarter than you.
But sometimes I do find peoplethat are younger than me that
I'm like wow, like what you saidwas just profound.
I feel stupid compared to youand like vice versa, where some
of my friends are in like their40s and my one business partner
is like in her fifties and I'mlike girl what?

Speaker 2 (07:31):
Well, what's the?

Speaker 1 (07:32):
oldest and youngest that you've dated in relation to
your, your own age at the time?
Ooh Okay, um, I guess I haven'tlike dated as in, just like
gone on dates or like been in arelationship.

Speaker 2 (07:39):
Like more than hookup .
But okay, You've beensituationship, whatever you want
.

Speaker 1 (07:44):
Yeah, you want, yeah, okay, I guess um not really
anybody younger than me, to behonest with you, maybe like the
same age as me, a year youngerthan me, um, but like one of the
girls I'm seeing right now,she's like 46, um.
The other girl I was seeing fora minute was like 30, in her
late 30s.
I think she's like 34 or Iguess that's mid 30s.

(08:05):
And then guys I probably datedguys in their 40s as well.
It's probably see that thatdoesn't surprise me well, I mean
also like going back to what wewere saying earlier, like I've
I've been in a long-termrelationship, um, with someone
that was my age at one point,like most of my 20s, and like

(08:25):
when I was like 18, like I waswith the same person for a while
.
So it was like, after gettingout of that, I'm like I
definitely don't know in today'slike day and age if I'd want to
date like a guy my age everagain it's.

Speaker 2 (08:41):
It's interesting you say that because when I own the
company in the modeling industryright, we had something that we
would call hot guy phase and itwould be like every time a new
model would come in 18, 19, 20,very young.
They'd always be dating someyoung hot guy and these guys,
they're like clones of eachother.
They all had theiktok hair, thedangly earring, like they all

(09:03):
looked exactly like.
But the interesting thing waswhen they turn 21, 22, 23,
they'd all be dating some likenormal looking dude, like some
dude, maybe dad bod, like somedude.
If he put on a brown shirt anddropped off your ups package,
you'd be like not surprised atall.
But all of these guys would beextremely intelligent and

(09:26):
successful and ambitious andusually older, because that's
usually what it takes to get tothat level.
It's almost like they got boredwith the hot guy phase and they
wanted something moreinteresting in their life yeah,
I, I totally agree with that.

Speaker 1 (09:40):
I mean, at one point I was dating a male stripper and
I was like, oh yeah, like thisis dope, this is everything.
This is so fun.
He's like partying.
He's hot, we look so cooltogether, we get so many
opportunities and get invited toall these places because we're
so hot.
But then it was like the dramathat comes with that, like just
both of us being attractive onboth ends, like I don't know,

(10:01):
that was kind of overwhelming.
Um, but also I just feel likefor me, like we were saying
earlier, like I'm not dating aguy that, like, has like three
roommates.
Like I'm not dating a guy that,like, is going to ask me to
eventually go 50-50 on rent,like.
I know that's likecontroversial for some people,
but I guess, like there arepeople that want to take care of

(10:23):
women and there are women thatwant to be taken care of and
there are guys that don't wantto take care of girls and there
are girls that don't want to betaken care of.
So I guess eventually they allend up with each other or you
can hope at least.
But yeah, I can Also.
I think it comes down to a lotof times.
I don't know if this is liketrue with you, but like I think
a lot of times peopleunderestimate how like important

(10:43):
pheromonal attraction is.

Speaker 2 (10:46):
Interesting.

Speaker 1 (10:47):
Yeah, and so I think, like when you're younger, like
you're a lot of times and for meto like, I was, like, you know,
with everybody or with someonefor like all of these reasons,
but maybe not, like it wasn'treally there and I didn't
understand why it wasn't there,wasn't really there and I didn't
understand why it wasn't there.
And then when I did end up likehaving like a pheromonal

(11:07):
attraction to someone, I waslike, oh my gosh, I'm literally
crazy about this person.

Speaker 2 (11:09):
Right now are you sure it's pheromonal I think, so
at least because what I willsay?
So I started off the biggestfucking simp nice guy.
My parents were very religious.
Oh, be polite to nice, toeverybody.
Yeah, of course girls will loveme if I do this, wisconsin and I
just got exactly and I just gotfucking friend zone cheated on

(11:31):
oh no, I like your friend better.
Blah, blah, blah.
And eventually I got so fuckingpissed off and frustrated with
that that I went like full 180,turned into the biggest
sociopath, fuck boy, narcissist,but, but like I was saying, a
professional, you know, not likethe amateurs nowadays.
Yeah, and all of a sudden,magically I'm the same person

(11:52):
with the same brain and the samebody and the same looks.
But magically girls would allof a sudden have a connection
with me right and now I've kindof graduated and mature, past
that stage of my life.
But I I understand the bigpicture and I wonder if it's
really pheromonal or is it theirattitude?
That was not necessarilysomething that was good for you,
but something that wasattractive and interesting and

(12:14):
made you want more.

Speaker 1 (12:16):
So I guess, like my two cents on that would be you
wouldn't.
It would be like both theywouldn't be mutually exclusive,
like like that connection andeverything and like them
realizing, oh hey, actually Ishould have given him a chance
That'll get you guys through thedoor.
But like, what I feel likereally makes a relationship
sustainable is having like thatscientific level of attraction
to each other, like physicallyand, I guess, like emotionally.

(12:38):
Obviously everybody wants todate their best friend, so I
feel like both of those thingsare I don't know if I agree with
that.

Speaker 2 (12:44):
you don't want to date your best friend oh, my
best friend's a guy, so thatwouldn't work out I think I want
to date somebody that I have avery strong connection with, but
I want to still have the, thepolarizing aspect that makes me
attracted to that person.
So so I'm I'm a very dominantperson in relationships.
Okay, I've just always beenthat way.

(13:04):
I was raised very chivalry, mydad's old school, very masculine
values.
I'm very much a provider.
If we're going on a date, I'mpaying, right.
If, if we're walking on thesidewalk, I'm walking on the car
side.
So if a car comes, you know,stop it with one hand, protect
my chick with the other hand,you know, like man shit, you
know it's funny, a lot of guysdon't know about that.

(13:27):
It's so bizarre to me because itwas just my dad Like if he ever
saw me if he saw me like today,walking on the wrong side, he'd
be like the fuck are you doing?
Like, get on the fucking otherside.
It's bizarre to me that peopledon't understand this.

Speaker 1 (13:41):
Actually just the other day, like I wasn't like
I'm not dating or anything, butI was hanging out with like a
guy and like even my guy friendslike usually would do that,
even if we're not like dating.
But the guy actually I was onone side because he was walking
his dog.

Speaker 2 (13:56):
He went around to the other side of me and was like,
oh, I'll protect you and the dog.

Speaker 1 (14:02):
Don't worry bro, like I was, like.
I didn't even know what to say,but I guess, like you know,
because it was a romantic moment, it didn't occur to him.
And then there was another partof me that was just like, maybe
just like.
No one ever taught him to dothat.
But like I'm from the Midwestas well, I like grew up in
Chicago.

Speaker 2 (14:15):
Oh, let's go.

Speaker 1 (14:25):
Yeah, we're definitely a different breed of
people, um, but also I feel likewhich you can tell me if you
agree with this, with likecalifornia culture.
I feel like in the midwest ingeneral, because you know other
people in other states in themidwest too, not just like
illinois or wisconsin.
Like I know the first time I'mlike in a social situation with
someone else.
If they don't like me, they'lljust be like yeah, like I don't
really like fuck with you.
They're not going to to get myInstagram.
I'm not really gonna like talkit up with me and like at one
point like they'll just likejokingly, be my line me or

(14:47):
something.
I'm like okay, this persondoesn't really like me, that's
fine.
In California I've likeliterally thought people were my
friends for like months andthen all of a sudden, like you
said, they're like rolling atthe club or at some like space
yacht event and like actually Ididn't even really like you when
I first met you, but like no, Ireally like you, you're so
great.
I'm like what?
Like you didn't even tell mefor the past like 90 days you

(15:08):
didn't really fuck with me thathard.
And now all of a sudden I'mfinding out like Are you talking
friends or relationships?
Friends, yeah, friends.

Speaker 2 (15:15):
I know exactly why.

Speaker 1 (15:16):
Why.

Speaker 2 (15:17):
It is 10 times as hard to make female friends in
LA than male friends.

Speaker 1 (15:22):
Oh.

Speaker 2 (15:23):
At least being a guy.
So I have like set, probablyseven or eight of us that I've
known since like the first yearI moved to LA.
We've been friends the entiretime, right.
The problem is, for guys, we'revery competitive, right.
So I played football growing upand it's like, yeah, you're in
practice, you're competing forthe starting role, right, and

(15:45):
we're yelling, screaming at eachother in practice, knocking
each other's heads off, and thenwe all come back to the locker
room and we're like, at the endof the day, we're on the same
team here, right, girls havethis thing where they're also
extremely competitive,especially in LA, with the
modeling industry, the actingindustry, everything else
influencing yeah.

(16:05):
But there, industry, the actingindustry, everything else
influencing, yeah, but there'slike no locker room moment.
It's like girls just get pissedat each other and just continue
to talk behind each other'sbacks like crazy well, it's
funny, our only version of that,which I'm sure you've already
heard about, like the drunkgirl's bathroom, yeah, but like
at that point we're all drunkand we're like having those
moments with people that arelike strangers the other other
thing I will say, though I doput some of the blame on the

(16:28):
fact.
Ok, so I used to date this girlRight, and I would see her
multiple times at a party withher actual real friends, having
actual real fun.

Speaker 1 (16:38):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (16:39):
And then she gets a text from a promoter that
there's another party andG-Eazy's there or Soulja Boy's
there or this TikToker's there,and ironically, half the time
the promoter's just lying to herand she believes it every time
like a dumbass.
And I will see her leave heractual friends to go to a party
where she doesn't know anybody,just for this perceived clout or

(17:03):
status and she can show peoplethat look how cool I am at this
party and so my ex had herbirthday.
Everybody's always asked me touse the house for events or
birthdays and stuff yeah.
And she's like Zach.
I got 80 people on the partyfull.
She decorates the whole place,buys all this food and like 10
people show up and I felt reallybad for her.

(17:23):
She was crying on her birthday.
I I did feel really bad for her.
But then the next couple days,when she got over it, I'd like
have like the hard talk and say,look, if you continue to
prioritize clout over genuinefriendships, you will continue
to make your bed and then nowyou have to sleep in it and it
is what it is that's true.

Speaker 1 (17:43):
Um, I feel like, too, a lot of people like,
especially because weA a lot ofpeople don't really realize like
every event that you go to,like that every party you go to
like, I understand some peopleare like Clout, I want to be
seen there.
But it's like, how are younetworking and using those
people to your advantage later?
Like, it's one thing for a girlto leave all of her friends, go

(18:05):
to a party and just be there totake Instagram photos and videos
you know what I mean and thenher friends are like dude, what
the hell.
But it's another thing where,like, because I've done this
before, not necessarily bailingon my friends, like while I'm
hanging out with them, buthaving like, okay, I can go to
like this content creation dayand like network and get in
videos with these other peopleand try to work with them later.
Or I can hang out with myfriends and do what we always do

(18:28):
every Saturday night.
It's like, once in a while I'mgonna go do that, but like I'm
not doing that, for like therehas to be a greater purpose or
greater cause for that.
Like you know, getting in otherpeople's videos, like
networking with other people,being able to work with other
people, doing content with themlater and things like that.
So it's like if, if you'regonna choose like the nightlife
and networking and socializingover your friends, like like are

(18:51):
you gaining enough that it'slike valuable for you?
you know what I mean, and Iguess that's what is a lot of
people like don't make it asvaluable for them well, the
reality is most people say whatyou say, right.

Speaker 2 (19:04):
They say I'm going here for networking, xyz, and
I'm like, okay, you're going todrake's party.
You're not even in the musicindustry, you're in the acting
industry so okay, eventually mybrain figured out like wait a
sec you just want to be I thinkit's literally as simple as you
want to be the cool kid in highschool who was invited to the

(19:26):
party and you want to say youlosers weren't invited.
I was invited because I'm cooland you're not.
I think it's literally a highschool type of mindset.

Speaker 1 (19:35):
I agree, but those are like low IQ people.

Speaker 2 (19:37):
It is low IQ.

Speaker 1 (19:37):
Yeah, and so it's like congratulations.
And those are also probablypeople that like scroll on
TikTok and Instagram for likeover eight hours a day, so it's
like I don't know.

Speaker 2 (19:48):
One of my exes.
She went to this therapist guyfor like years, right, and I was
like I can tell you the reasonyou have anxiety.
And it's not because your momput your sister's spelling test
on the fridge when you're littleand not your spelling test and
now you have trauma.
It's because you wake, wake up,you take your vape in one hand

(20:08):
and your phone in your other andyou stare at tiktok, two inches
from your fucking face, forlike five hours every morning.
That's why you have anxiety.

Speaker 1 (20:14):
it's not because of this, whatever and then you have
an iced coffee an hour laterand then by noon you've had like
however many milligrams ofnicotine and iced coffee.
No wonder you have anxiety yeah,yeah with me, with some of the
people not everybody, but justlike a couple people I know like
they're just like generally,like not very like honest or, um
, like accountable people, andthey'll be like, oh my gosh, I'm

(20:37):
like having anxiety, I'm havinga panic attack and a part of me
is just like I don't know ifthat's a panic attack or that's
just the you don't have a clearconscience and like naturally
that's going to be like a thingabout it.
So it doesn't really matter ifyou take a little Raza, a little
Raza, pram for the rest of yourlife.
Like you might as well just likestop being shitty to everybody
around you, and maybe you'llhave less stress as well.

Speaker 2 (20:57):
Yeah, a lot of times.
It's okay let's fix the bigproblems first.

Speaker 1 (21:05):
That problems first that are obvious glaring red
flags in their life and then goto therapy if it's still not
working out.
Yeah, I mean personally, whichthis is probably controversial
as well I'm not a fan of therapy.
I don't want to go to therapy.
This must be a midwest thing.

Speaker 2 (21:13):
I always get so much heat for this.
Although I say therapy is notgood for guys, I don't know for
girls I don't have all thoseextra hormones, I don't know
what it's like to be a girl butI think for guys it is very
counterproductive in 90% of thecases.

Speaker 1 (21:26):
For me.
I just feel like with like somethings, um, the amount of steps
I have to take back and thenlike do all the shadow work and
healing in order to get like acouple steps further is like, uh
, I don't know, maybe once again, maybe that's a Midwestern
thing, but with some things likefamily or like history or
whatever, I just want to put itin a box, I want to put that box

(21:48):
in a shelf and I just neverwant to open up that box again
and for some people, likethey'll have like like
associations and stuff like thatand that'll bring them to like
their trauma or whatever.
I'm guessing just guys mightnot have as much of that.
I don't have as much of thateither.
Don't have as much of thateither.
But okay, crazy story actuallywhich, as she ends up saying
this, is gonna be hilarious sobut, like I said, I was like

(22:11):
seeing this one girl, like kindof seeing her.
We were like really good friendsand we like hooked up a couple
times or whatever.
And she like tells me at onepoint um, but she was married,
by the way, but it was like theywere cool, she's an open
marriage, she knew me andeverything.
And we like got into anargument about something and I
was like dude, I need some spaceright now.
And her like husband called meand was like hey, like what's

(22:35):
going on, like trying to mediate, and I was like, uh, I don't
really want to have thisconversation with you.
And he was like, hey, shementioned you guys were gonna go
to like couples therapy whenyou guys got into like your
first argument.
Whatever happened to that?
And I was like what she?
said we were going to couplestherapy.

Speaker 2 (22:52):
Like I was not made aware of this.

Speaker 1 (22:53):
I was like one, I was not made aware of this.
And two, I feel like, yeah,I've made it pretty clear.
One I'm not interested in goingto therapy, let alone like we.
We want to go to couplestherapy.
When you're in an openrelationship and you're going to
like couples therapy with yourhusband and me, like I don't
know, dude, that was wild thatsound wild.

Speaker 2 (23:10):
Right go or no no, of course not.

Speaker 1 (23:12):
I told him.
I was like I don't know why.
She even told you that I, herand I never had that
conversation.
I'm not going to couplestherapy.
I'm not going to any level oftherapy, um, but uh, have you
ever had to go to couplestherapy?

Speaker 2 (23:23):
it wasn't couples therapy.
So the girl that I was tellingyou about before yeah, after I
told her that I knew the reasonfor anxiety and she didn't need
therapy anymore, she told hertherapist and then the next week
she's like zach, my therapistwants you to come into our
session because I think he sawhey, my client.
I'm gonna lose this clientunless I can like somehow change

(23:46):
the situation so it wasn'tcouples therapy.
But then I fucking go in thereand this guy's telling me that
I'm the reason now for hertrauma, I'm the toxic thing in
her life, and halfway through Irealize this guy's trying to
fuck my girlfriend.
Oh, and so I fucking stormed outof the therapist room.
Right, she comes running up tome zach, zach, what are you

(24:08):
doing?
I'm like your therapist istrying to fuck you and she's
like first of all, zach, he'snot my therapist, he's my energy
healer.
No, and I'm like he's not evena real therapist.
What is an energy healer?
You climb to the top of amountain and you get struck by
lightning.
Now you're an energy healer.
You climb to the top of amountain and you get struck by
lightning.
Now you're an energy healer.
Like Walmart brand therapist istrying to tell me what to do.

Speaker 1 (24:29):
So actually that reminds me.
Okay, you know the guy thatused to be in the suit of Barney
the dinosaur.

Speaker 2 (24:36):
I heard Didn't you like molest kids or some shit?
I think that was the other one.

Speaker 1 (24:40):
but he's now the same thing.
He's like an energy like sexhealer or whatever and
apparently he's like found a lotof his like clients on like
Tinder and shit like that Crazyand the funniest part about
that's like wild to me.
But I guess, like, because he'slike a you know, a sexual
energy healer, he can't use acondom because that would block

(25:01):
the energy flow, so he just hasto sleep with all of his
patients raw yeah.

Speaker 2 (25:05):
And it's like I mean, how else are you going to heal
them unless you bang all yourpatients?

Speaker 1 (25:09):
Yeah, you know you get a little chlamydia in the
meantime.

Speaker 2 (25:11):
It's just a side effect of the energy healing
Right Would you rather havelifelong trauma or a little
chlamydia, you know no big deal.

Speaker 1 (25:19):
Wild, wild, wild, but it's crazy.
People fall for it though it's.
I was about to say mad respectto him for being able to like
pull that through to begin with,like you know what I mean, um,
but I wonder, like I bet youthere's like one hot one, you
know what I mean.
Like I'm sure most of them areprobably not good looking that's
true.

Speaker 2 (25:37):
I bet you there's one hot one, and he's like yes,
finally.

Speaker 1 (25:40):
Yeah, my plan paid off yeah, what would you do like
if you were a chick and you'relike talking to this guy, he's
like really like convincing you,and then all of a sudden you
find out he used to be the manin the Barney the Dinosaur suit
it's funny because girls loveclout.

Speaker 2 (25:58):
But I'm like would that clout still be clout or
would they be like this isfucking lame, like the barney
guy?
Or they'd be like, yeah, I'mdating the book, because I've
heard girls like be excited thatthey're dating like a big name,
anything almost like big name,fucking rubik's cube player or
some shit big name video gameperson, like they don't care,
it's as cloud as cloud as cloud.

Speaker 1 (26:18):
Yes, I wonder if they name video game, person Like
they don't care, it's just cloutis clout is clout.

Speaker 2 (26:21):
Yes, so I wonder if they would care about the Barney
suit.

Speaker 1 (26:22):
I don't know For me.
I can't think of anything thatwould make me more dry than that
.
Like no, but also like have youever like I swear on several
occasions like my friends arelike I'm dating a celebrity is
like cousin or like brother.

Speaker 2 (26:40):
You know what I mean, and I'm like there's no way.

Speaker 1 (26:43):
Like this guy's probably said this like of
course, but I can't be the one.
You know what I mean.
I always look like the assholeand I'm like dude.
Did they prove it to you, like?

Speaker 2 (26:51):
it.
I've.
I cannot tell you how manytimes a girl has told me oh, I'm
seeing this guy, he's draDrake's manager.
It's always Drake's manager.
I'm like I can do one Googlesearch and tell you this is not
fucking Drake's manager and it'slike three different guys.
Like I've met so many Drake'smanagers.

Speaker 1 (27:08):
There was one, though I can't remember his name.
He seemed like he was legit andlike he was basically posting
like he wanted like escorts tocome on vacation with him oh,
that's, probably so I wonderlike yeah, if maybe he was
affiliated, and like these girlsare like I'm dating him, when
really they just went to cabofor the weekend and like I don't
know, but the funniest becauseI was following him, for I can't

(27:29):
remember his name or else Iwould drop it right now but I
like saw he was like posting forgirls like come do something,
and I was like I'm notresponding but like interested
to see how this like pans out.
And then like a couple dayslater he's posting about how
someone like stole some stufffrom the house and they have the
footage, they have theirinformation.
Her friends need to like haveher give the stuff back.

Speaker 2 (27:47):
And I'm just like that's crazy, you invited random
girls from instagram to come onvacation and sleep with you I
had this girl steal, 450 bucksand my dave and buster's power
card.
I was very upset about itthat's a lot of points on that
thing, I was gonna get theremote control car soon and she
fucked me over.

Speaker 1 (28:08):
God, that bitch, that bitch, oh my gosh, never got it
back right.
I don't think.
I don't think anyone's everstolen from me that I've dated,
thankfully do you?

Speaker 2 (28:17):
do you date more?
So, guys or girls, do you havea preference?
Or is it literally so, like I?

Speaker 1 (28:21):
said like like I, I was in like one like really
long-term relationship, um, andI haven't been like single super
long after that, um, but I wasdating one guy for a really long
period of time.

Speaker 2 (28:31):
Since then it's kicking it and hooking up with
more women, but I've like likedated a guy.
I see, I see, yeah, like is.
Is there something that like ismore like oh, girls are more
just fun, and but I could neverdate a girl.
Or would you be open to datinga girl?

Speaker 1 (28:51):
oh, I would be totally open and I don't know,
once again this is controversialor whatever.
But my experience like beingbisexual is like I enjoy being
like a female in myrelationships and because I'm
like financially stable, I'mdoing well, I have like you know
what I mean.
I have my shit together a lotof the times, like the girls I'm
dating want me to be daddy.

(29:12):
I'm like, oh no, I'm not daddy,I'm baby, like I want you to be
daddy.
So it's just kind of likefiguring that out, like with the
right female that I do havechemistry with and I vibe with,
that's been kind of the biggestthing.
It's obviously a lot easier tofind dominant men than dominant
women.
Yeah, and like personally metoo, like I'm like I, I I don't
mind butch girls, but like I'venever dated a stud, never really

(29:33):
have like repeatedly hooked upwith any studs, like I like
feminine women, I like masculinemen, like.
So that's been kind of.
The thing too is just like,yeah, like finding the right
girl that's also like mentallystable and doing well, like I
guess just in the circles thatI've been, it's been easier for
me to find men to like date andfeel like I could be more
serious with in a potentialrelationship later than like the

(29:55):
girls I'm more like having funwith and you know they're either
married or, like you know,dating other guys too.

Speaker 2 (30:01):
Yeah, yeah, I mean it's definitely, I think, to
find more of the provider role,which you said you're more
interested in.
Um, have you ever tried the thedabbled in the sugar daddy
scene?
So, with them interested in itwith modeling and stuff like
that.

Speaker 1 (30:15):
I like learned a lot about it, um, it, um, but like,
and not that I haven't beenpresented and what's the
funniest thing, I didn't know.
Okay, wait, I'll finish whatI'm saying and then I'll go into
the rant.
Okay, no, not really like.
I've had people like talk to meabout it.
I've had girls that wanted meto go on like seeking
arrangement dates with thembecause they wanted like a third
or whatever.

(30:36):
But, um, not necessarily mything.
Um, I like hooking up girlswith other people if I'm, you
know, seeing and that'll workout.
But, um, okay, what was I aboutto say earlier?
Shoot, now I got on a tangent.
Okay, like with the modelingand stuff.
Um, like my friends in thesummer they'd always be like oh

(30:56):
yeah, come on our friend's yacht.
No guys, though, like come onthe yacht and I'm like oh, ok,
and so like me and my friendswould all come on the yacht and
then, like you know, there'slike a guy and then his two
friends there and I figured outlater on like they were trying
to cast me and all my friends tobe their sugar babies, but like
I didn't really catch on to it,I guess, or there wasn't really
like ever that much pressure.

(31:17):
Um, so I guess, like being inSouthern California, like, and
being a model, like if any girlsays that like she's never even
thought about it or never likelooked at a website or anything
like that would be hard tobelieve but, um, based on what I
do for work and everything like, I don't really need to go that
route right now.
I think like, yeah, if I was inlike a really bad position, I
was down to find a guy that,like could date me and take care

(31:38):
of me.
Like I'm not opposed to it, butI'm gonna try to be an
independent woman firstinteresting.

Speaker 2 (31:44):
I've uh, I've never tried it either.
They're in wisconsin.
There's no sugar daddy scene.
The guys are too broke and thegirls are too ugly.
It's just like doesn't happen.

Speaker 1 (31:52):
I figured that you were a model manager, you
weren't like like casting yourmodels off, seeking arrangements
I did, I did get on no what'sgoing?

Speaker 2 (32:02):
on.
I did get accused one time ofbeing a sugar daddy, which is
not which is a false accusation.
Um, I was so mad at the girl.

Speaker 1 (32:10):
She's still my friend ladies, he's not a sugar daddy,
no, I'm just kidding.
The problem is, the problem is,like I said, like I was raised
very chivalrous right so, likedates, I'm paying, I'm paying
for everything, blah blah.

Speaker 2 (32:21):
Now I like to travel too, and if I'm dating a girl
and I want to go to europe orasia or australia, it's like I'm
paying for the whole trip,because I would feel weird like,
hey, uh, did you get the venmorequest for the 87 and 17 cents
for the uber?
Like I would feel more weirdsaying that than just be like no
, I'm a man, yeah, I want to goon this trip.

(32:42):
Anyway, I'm taking you with me,I'm gonna pay for it.
That's just how I am.
So this girl that I'm goodfriends with she's like queen of
the sugar babies.
She has like 10 sugar daddies.
Each one pays for a differentpart of her.
She has like all the infinitystones of the sugar daddy.
She's like very powerful oh mygosh, and and she's like zach,

(33:03):
you know you're a sugar daddy.
I'm like what do you mean?
And she's like every guy paysfor something.
Maybe you just pay for drinks,maybe you also pay for dinners,
maybe you pay for trips, maybeyou buy purses.
And she's like there's just lowclass sugar daddies and high
class sugar daddies.
Everybody's a sugar daddy.
And I was mad because in themoment I didn't have a good

(33:24):
comeback and it was in front ofmy friends, so she looked
smarter than me and I'm muchsmarter than hers, but she kind
of got me well, I think thedifference is are you providing
for a girl that you're choosing,or did you form like with her
and those guys?

Speaker 1 (33:36):
I'm sure because that's my understanding with my
friends that do too they're inlike.
That's why it's called seekingarrangements it's an arrangement
like my friends that are inarrangements or like girls like
that I've seen like dating olderguys or I'm assuming that's a
situation.
They don't get to bitch at themabout the things your
girlfriend bitch at you aboutwhen they're on vacation.
They're not like you know whatI mean.

Speaker 2 (33:53):
They're like on like that guy it's like, it's like a
transactional relationship.

Speaker 1 (33:57):
Well, to some extent, I mean, I guess transactional
could be a word, because I evenfeel like people in marriages
are like that too, where theyjust know like hey, he's doing
this for me, then like, this ishis role, this is my role you
know what?
I mean, and so like, yeah, yourrole is, you know, like, hey,
I'm here to like make sure he'shaving a good time.
I'm here to like have him havefun.
But the weird thing with that,though, like okay, like I hear,

(34:19):
with those situations, like thegirls will like, let's say, the
guy's like, oh, I want to takeyou to Italy for two weeks.
I'll be like, well, I'm gonnalose all this money at work, so
you have to pay for my trip andthen give me like a lump sum
yeah, yeah, of money too.

Speaker 2 (34:31):
Yeah, I've never done that.

Speaker 1 (34:32):
I just I couldn't imagine like being like oh so
you're gonna take me and I'malso gonna need like to make up
all the money that I'm gonnalose from work and you're also
gonna need to pay for my hair,my nails, like I mean, I'm
impressed, I love that you knowsome girls are able to do that,
but it's just like I don't know.
It seems a little bold.

Speaker 2 (34:49):
It's an interesting whole scene and and because I
will say there is some gray areawhere I have known girls who
have had sugar daddies and thenthey genuinely fall in love with
their sugar daddies.
And then at that point, it'salmost like a real relationship.
It's like really not that muchdifferent.

Speaker 1 (35:07):
Um but.

Speaker 2 (35:08):
But that's the way I see it is like, okay, if I take
a girl on a trip, it's a tripNumber one that I would be doing
anyway.
Number two that I'm enjoyingsharing the experience with her,
so I'm also getting somethingout of it.
It's like a shared experienceversus for me, if I buy a girl
Louis Vuitton purse, I literallygive two fucks about a Louis

(35:28):
Vuitton purse.
In that situation it feels likeit's here's a purse, so you
will like me.
It feels like, uh, I'm doingthis to get you to like me and
not we just have a relationship.

Speaker 1 (35:40):
Yeah, I'm just a man.

Speaker 2 (35:40):
So I fucking pay for shit.

Speaker 1 (35:42):
Yeah, I feel that too , and I prefer more
experience-based dates or likeexperience-based, like
connection as well.
But maybe that's like one ofthe love languages, things Like
you prefer quality time thangifts and what's it.

Speaker 2 (35:55):
I'm more physical touch and words of affirmation.

Speaker 1 (35:57):
Okay.

Speaker 2 (35:58):
Well, what's yours?
A more physical touch and wordsof affirmation okay, well,
what's yours?

Speaker 1 (36:00):
uh, all of them do it all.

Speaker 2 (36:04):
No, I'm just red flag , giant red flag.
You have to do everything.

Speaker 1 (36:08):
Yeah, just, you know um, no, I guess I don't know um,
I guess physical touch, butlike I don't want, like at a
party I'm not trying to be PDAthe whole time.
You know what I mean.
And so I think like, likethat's why I guess it's hard for
me to define what it is, causeit's like not like mood
dependent, but you know what Imean.

(36:28):
I feel like some people thatare like, oh, like I like like
touching and stuff like that.

Speaker 2 (36:32):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (36:32):
I don't want you to be like touching me when I'm at
a party or at the bar constantlyyou know what I mean but like
when we have our time, you guysno yeah, I don't really like the
clinginess um which also that'sI feel like words of
affirmation, like I don't reallyneed that much like affirmation
either.
So I guess, yeah, like physicaltime might be mine.
I like gifts, but, like I said,I want it to be like more like
thoughtful you know what I mean.

(36:53):
I'm not like, but that's why Ilike the experiences too.
So I feel that or like concerts, you know, like yeah, stuff
like that it's the same, like Idon't really I've never I don't
think I've ever had anybody I'mdating like be like, okay, we
need to go buy this bag, rightnow like we've like gone to the
mall, then gone shoppingtogether where we're both like
trying on things and gettingthings, but it's like but are
they buying you things or areyou just paying for your own?

Speaker 2 (37:13):
no, no, no yeah you said no, we're going shopping,
yeah, like you well, not illlike I.

Speaker 1 (37:21):
I mean I don't know.
Yeah, it's just not for meanymore.
Like I said, I feel like I didmy time with like being going 50
50 in a relationship and payingfor myself on everything I.

Speaker 2 (37:32):
I think that more girls should care about money in
a relationship and not in agold digger kind of way, but in
a.
I got an argument with my momthe other day about this,
actually oh yeah so she's likezach, you're in la, you know
you're always dating models,actresses.
Like why don't you should careabout personality, find a nice
girl at church, right?

(37:53):
She's very conservative.
I'm like mom, do you want metoday?
Are you saying I should dateuglier girls?
And she's like no, no, not ugly, just like good personality.
I'm like okay, mom, let's dothe math on this.
Do there exist hot girls withgood personalities?
Yes, and there's ugly girlswith good personalities.
Of course, I want the beautifulgirl who also has a good

(38:13):
personality.
And I think girls.
It's like yeah, yeah, there'srich dudes with great
personalities, or broke dudeswith good personalities.
Like if you, if you are a goodlooking girl and you have the
opportunity, why wouldn't youtake the rich dude with a good
personality?
Like two plus two is four?
Like what do you want people todo?

Speaker 1 (38:30):
it doesn't make sense to me and I think with both of
those situations, like don'tlower your standards in any
situation, you know what I meanlike it's better to like.
And I just think with peoplelike, especially after my one
long-term relationship, I waslike young, I didn't really know
anything and I got out of itand I had to learn a lot, but it
was like I, I'm gonna beattracted, I'm gonna have

(38:51):
chemistry with people for therest of my life you know, what I
mean.
So it's like do I want to findchemistry with someone that fits
what I'm looking for, or do Iwant to find someone that I have
chemistry that I try to makefit into what I want later on?
And it's like that's why I thinka lot of girls are unhappy in
their relationships and it'slike kind of going back to oh, I
can change him.

(39:11):
Or like falling in love withthe potential of the guy.
It's like I'm not here to seethe potential in a guy or a girl
that I'm dating.
I'm not here to try to get themthere.
With my friends all day longI'll invest in you.
I'll do everything you need toget you to the next step.
I'm there for all my friends.
They'll all vouch for that.
But in the dating scene, if I'mreally dedicating the rest of

(39:34):
my life to you, I have my shittogether.
I want you to have your shittogether.
I'm trying to make more money.
I want you to have more money,but I also want you to like do
better than me.
I want to learn from the personI'm dating as well you know,
what I mean.
I want I would love to be likeoh, what's her name?
Lisa vanderpump, have like ayou know a husband, but then
also have my own stuff that I doand be my own type of business

(39:54):
woman, you know, and I thinkespecially in la.
Like that's definitely possiblebut it's not really things that
they do talk about in themidwest.
Like I don't think any of likethe girls that I know that model
in illinois are on seeking, orraya or whatever those other
sites are like she's not reallytalked about as much plus, it's
like if you need to get marriedto like a broke guy, it's kind
of like I'm gonna fly middleseat on spirit the rest of your

(40:17):
life.

Speaker 2 (40:18):
You want to look down at your ticket, seat 57F, like
where's our seats?
Babe In the back, get thebinoculars out.
And it's like why wouldn't youwant a lifestyle on top of also
having a connection withsomebody?

Speaker 1 (40:29):
I mean, I know.

Speaker 2 (40:39):
And I don't know.
But it's funny because I feellike if some people like heard
me say that they would thinkthat was like shallow or like I
don't know.
I don't think it is.
I also think like likingsomeone only for the connection
is also a trap, because thereality is connection comes and
goes.
To people act like oh yeah,connection is forever.
I'm like you know how manypeople I know broke up with
somebody because the connectiongot lost.
I fell out of love.
X, y, z reason In in fact Ihear that much more than oh,

(41:01):
like he lost all his money andnow we broke up like I think you
need as many things lining upas possible.

Speaker 1 (41:08):
I feel you and that was kind of like part of the
reason why, like my onerelationship ended is like as
like an adult, especially likewhen I resent my partner.
I like genuinely have no ideawhat to do with that emotion.
You know what I mean.
So it's like the chemistry atone point didn't outweigh the
resentment and the frustrationand the like bullshit so it's

(41:30):
like you can have a connectionwith someone your whole life but
the other bullshit is gonnawait where.
It's like who fucking cares thatyou and I have a great
connection?
Like I'm crying every day, fuckthis.
Like yeah, so I don't know, butI think with everybody, like be
, be picky, you know what I mean.
Like don't settle, take yourtime, um.
But also I say this is like a,a girl in her late 20s, almost

(41:51):
in her 30s, without any kids andisn't married and so almost in
your 30s?
well, okay, but when you go tosome of these photo shoots,
they're like where was I at theother day?
I don't know, it was like acontent creation thing, and at
one point I was like I might bethe oldest person here and all
of a sudden I'm like you know,I'm at the grocery store

(42:12):
afterwards and the uh bagger islike oh, like, did you need bags
, ma'am?
And like is there a reason whyyou called me ma'am instead of
miss?
Like, do I look old?
Like um, but yeah, that's likehow LA is, though.
Right, like people are prettyactive out here.
You see, like people that are.
I guess that's one thing Ireally didn't see in Illinois.

(42:32):
I never saw any kids that werelike really young and really
successful.
You know what I mean.
I've never saw like 18-old kidswith Porsches and stuff like
that.

Speaker 2 (42:41):
And half of it is too , is a lot of.
It is just mommy and daddy'smoney.
And they tell you yeah, I havea crypto app.
And you're like, what's thewebsite?
And they're like, don't have awebsite.
And you're like nah you justhave mommy's and daddy's money
and it is what it is, you know.

Speaker 1 (42:53):
Right, it's interesting.

Speaker 2 (42:56):
Well, what's your type when it comes to guys?

Speaker 1 (42:59):
Let's go looks first.
Okay, I'm going to be.
Okay Gosh.
I don't know who's going tohear this right now, but
whatever, Just as far as looksgo.
Taller Hispanic dudes withtattoos.

Speaker 2 (43:09):
Interesting, very specific.

Speaker 1 (43:10):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (43:11):
And they have to be taller than you.

Speaker 1 (43:13):
Yeah, I would prefer it.
Yeah, and then, if we're beingpicky, also would ride a
motorcycle and can do wheelieson the motorcycle.

Speaker 2 (43:19):
Okay, you like the bad boys, bad boys.

Speaker 1 (43:22):
But like you have, you also like have a career or
something.
Yeah, but yeah, I guess ifwe're just going for looks, it
doesn't even necessarily be fuckboy.
But I ride a motorcycle too, solike I like that, like
lifestyle stuff like that.

Speaker 2 (43:40):
But yeah, as far as go, that would be like.
I dated one time a girl who wasit was the first fashion model
I ever dated.
She was 5, 11, so she was threeinches shorter than me, but
with heels it's like pretty,pretty borderline um and she
said that she used to alwaysdate like basketball players,
nba players, stuff like that,because they're so tall and she
got fucked over so many times.
She's like zach, I'm gonna datea short king.
And then she starts dating theshort guy who's like 5'9", which

(44:02):
is actually average height fora guy, but she was towering over
him like Shrek.

Speaker 1 (44:05):
For her that's a short king, yeah, for me it's
not.

Speaker 2 (44:08):
And she told me she was like one day he comes over
and she's like I had like threeglasses of wine already in me
and she already in me and she'slike, she's like zach.
I opened the door, I gave him ahug and she's like I picked him
up and I spun him around and Iwatched his little legs flail
out.
She's like zach.
I lost all respect for himafter that day she was so dry at

(44:30):
that point and I was just likeit was your fault.
But I get it like I understand.
You want to feel like a woman.
You want to feel like somebodyis putting you in that role,
because that's where you feelsexy and hot and everything else
.
So I get it.

Speaker 1 (44:46):
Yeah, it makes sense.
But at the same time, like Idon't know, I feel like I guess
for her like, like you said,five nine is a short King.
But I feel like a lot of girls,like some of my friends, are
taller as well and, um, theworst part about it is when they
like kind of settle for a guythat's like shorter than them

(45:07):
and then they get treated badly.
It's like almost like a doubleinsult to like I I like even
gave him a chance and he was ashort king, and then he
disrespected me.
It was like I lowered mystandards for him and then he
still disrespected me.
It was like I lowered mystandards for him and then he
still disrespected me.
I'm like I don't know what totell you.

Speaker 2 (45:23):
I have heard a lot of girls say if I'm going to get
cheated on, I'd rather getcheated on by an attractive guy,
and I'm like, yeah, I don'tthink that's really good logic.

Speaker 1 (45:34):
No for me.
I mean, I get it, but I'm kindof like I don't know, I just, I
would just want to be cheated onby someone who would use a
condom.

Speaker 2 (45:43):
You know what I mean Work smart.
That's called brains, big brainenergy over here, just protect
my health.
You know what I mean.

Speaker 1 (45:48):
Don't let me find out about it.
I feel like most people arefucking creeping nowadays
anyways.
Like, whatever, just like,don't hurt anybody.
Don't hurt anybody.
Like don't get anybody's healthin jeopardy.
Like, please, like, you knowwhat I mean.
Um, and that's the craziest,like some of my friends have
actually found out, they weregetting cheated on because their
ph was disrupted.
No, way that's yeah, and she waslike dude, like, and I was like

(46:09):
, girl, there's only one reason.
And she's like I thought Ithink.
So I was like yeah, like, maybeyou should start using a condom
with him.
She's's like well, now he'sgoing to think I'm cheating on
him.
I'm like no, don't let himgaslight you like that?
Don't let him do it.
No.

Speaker 2 (46:23):
I always wear a condom, even when I'm dating a
girl, and my guy friends thinkI'm crazy and I'm just like.
I had a pregnancy scare oncealso too.
That like really fucked me upmentally, and after that I I was
like fuck that shit.
Yeah, I can't believe how manypeople just raw dog strangers
from the fucking club.

Speaker 1 (46:39):
I'm like y'all are going to get something.

Speaker 2 (46:42):
It's a matter of time .

Speaker 1 (46:43):
It's crazy and, honestly, when you started that
sentence, I thought you weregoing to say even when I get
head, and I was going to be likeno, you don't.

Speaker 2 (46:50):
No, I did when I was like because I grew up with like
the Catholic guilt kind of.

Speaker 1 (46:54):
Thing.

Speaker 2 (47:00):
So, so, like I did when I was like early 20s no,
and then finally just enough.
Girls are like what the fucklike?

Speaker 1 (47:02):
what the fuck are you talking about?
Um wait, that's too funnythough, but I don't know.
Like I remember in like sex edor something, they told people
like you're supposed to be usinga condom.
I think maybe it was like thefirst time I went to planned
parenthood yeah, they're likeyeah, you're supposed to be
using a condom even for oral sex, and I was like that's a thing,
like there's no way, yeah.
But also like the sexuallytransmitted infection rate in

(47:23):
california is pretty high, like,and also I heard that they at
first the law was you do have tolet people know in california
if you have like a sexuallytransmitted disease that's like
incurable or whatever that couldlike be passed on to them.
They like change that law andnow it's not illegal anymore,

(47:44):
and I don't really understand it.
But I'm like how could anybodybe like yeah, actually we're
going to take that back.
You guys don't need to informother people.

Speaker 2 (47:52):
I mean, that should be scary, to be honest.

Speaker 1 (47:54):
Yeah, or actually going back to Planned Parenthood
again, which is actuallyinteresting because I'm bi.
Um, uh, they always like atPlanned Parenthood, if I like go
there, they'll um offer me prepand I'm like no, you think I
would rather take prep insteadof just using a condom?

Speaker 2 (48:13):
like.

Speaker 1 (48:13):
I'd rather take a drug to probably not get AIDS
instead of use a condom it'slike no, even if there's a point
, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero,one percent chance I could get
aids from sleeping with the guythat slept with another guy, I'm
not gonna take prep every dayof my life like what yeah and so
like the off chance that youlike but obviously this is being
offered at planned parenthoodsacross america because there are

(48:33):
that many people that wouldprefer it.
And I'm not a guy and I've not.
I've never been a guy that hadsex with a guy, so I'll never
know what it's like to use acondom or not use a condom or
anything.
So maybe my opinion is invalid,but I find it so fascinating
that this was even created sopeople could have like
unprotected, safer, unprotectedsex, I guess it is bizarre.

Speaker 2 (48:54):
It is bizarre for sure.
Um, I had one time where, so soI have these condoms that like
they kind of like numb your dick.
So if you want to last a reallylong time, like if it's like
first time sleeping with a girl,you want to like fucking nail
it down.
You want to fucking lay downthe wood.

Speaker 1 (49:08):
You know what I mean.

Speaker 2 (49:09):
You wear that on round one.
So then you know, round one.
Sometimes you don't last aslong you can go.
Like forever Right.
So like forever right.
So one time I did that with agirl round one and then for
round two she starts like givingme a blow job.

Speaker 1 (49:25):
But I hadn't like washed the numbing stuff, oh no
so she puts in her mouth.

Speaker 2 (49:27):
She's like, oh, she's like what the fuck is that?
And I was like oh shit.
I was like yeah, go wash offyour mouth.
But like at first she was likeyour dick is fucking nasty and I
was like, oh right, she's likewhat is this taste?

Speaker 1 (49:38):
you're like no, it's light.

Speaker 2 (49:39):
Okay, don't worry, it's just numbing cream, just
dope, but it's.
It was kind of embarrassingbecause like I usually don't
tell girls that well, and atthat point, what are you gonna
say?

Speaker 1 (49:47):
yeah, I mean you kind of have.

Speaker 2 (49:48):
Otherwise she's just gonna think I was like some
fucking std or some shit I mean,if anything, though, just be
like.

Speaker 1 (49:53):
I was just so excited to be with you, like, right, I
bet, at that point though,you're going back to the simping
, so I wish I could be a littlesimp guy run around with my simp
friends, ride our bird scootersaround town.

Speaker 2 (50:08):
But it's just, I'd be lone less the rest of my life,
you know straight up.

Speaker 1 (50:13):
So what is like the craziest thing you've ended up
doing as a simp for another girlback in the day in high school
I was very shy, very awkward.

Speaker 2 (50:23):
My family didn't have money so I got made fun of a
lot so I couldn't get a girl tosave my life.
I was just like.
In fact they actually myfreshman year.
They started someone started arumor that I was gay because I
was like that bad with girls,which, like gay, wasn't like
cool and trendy like it is now,you could have still gotten beat
up for it.
So my junior year, finally thisgirl, my friend, is like oh,

(50:43):
this girl, julie, wants you toask her to prom.
And I'm fucking pumped right.
I'm like, don't fuck this up,zach, don't fuck this up, Ask
her to prom.
We start dating and I would dothe cringiest fucking shit
because I was like in love orwhatever.
So I would literally drive tothe Walmart between our houses
every Monday at 6 am, I wouldpick up a bag of the purple

(51:04):
Skittles because that was herfavorite Skittles and some
flowers and write like a cutenote and like put on her
doorstep.
So she would like be surprised.
You know, like real sim, shit.
Right, I did it for three and ahalf years every day every
Monday oh, every Monday okay andthree and a half years later
we're in college, right, we'regetting our majors or whatever,

(51:25):
and my friend calls me on thephone and he's like yo, I hate
to be able to tell you this, butI was at a party last night and
I see Julie, she goes off intothis room with another guy.
They're in there for like 45minutes.
Everybody's saying they hookedup.
And I'm like, no, bro, I'm inlove.
She would never do this to me,never do it to me.
We're we're gonna get marriedsomeday like a little simp.

(51:47):
So the next day I go confronther, I drive an hour to to her
school, go to her dorm room.
I'm like fucking shaking at thedoor, I'm like knocking right
and she opens the door andinstead of being like, oh my, my
God, you surprised me.
She was like what are you doinghere?
And that moment I knew shecheated on me.

(52:09):
But the worst part was the guyshe cheated on me with was the
guy she would always call me andcomplain about.
Oh, he's an asshole.
He's hooking up with two of myfriends at the same time, behind
their backs, and they found outfuck this guy.
And I'm like that's the fuckingguy you were hooking up with.
And I still remember the lastthing I said to her.
I was like bawling my eyes outat this point and she was just

(52:31):
like very nonchalant, likeunaffected.
Yeah, and I was like julie, Iwould do anything in the world
to make you happy, I just wantto know why.
And she literally goes likethis.
She like shrugs her shouldersand she's like I just got bored.
And that second I was like Iwill never be this fucking simp

(52:52):
nice guy loser ever again.
And so that's when, the nexteight years, every day, I'd wake
up and fucking grind on myYouTube channel, and every night
I would just try to fuck asmany girls as possible, to
fucking fill the void and becomea giant fuck boy, right.
And so, eight years later, Ifinally made it.
My YouTube channel blows up.
I moved to LA Mansion models,cars, everything Right and I

(53:16):
find my ex on Instagram.
I haven't talked to her ineight years, and so I go follow
her, right.
And she follows me back.

Speaker 1 (53:22):
You followed her.
Yeah, follow her right and shefollows me back.

Speaker 2 (53:24):
You followed her.
Yeah, yeah, weird, well so.
So this is why I did it.
So I wanted her to follow meback and then that night, just
you could flex on her, I postedso many stories cars mansion
models all over me, right, andshe unfollows me the next day.
So then I go to walmart the nextday, I get a bag of the purple
Skittles and I take a pictureand then I put thank you for

(53:48):
making me the man that I amtoday with a picture, and then
underneath I put so I can getgirls who are way hotter than
you and your big nose, fireemoji.
And that moment healed my innerchild.
No more trauma, I win, you loseNana, nana, boo-boo, stick your
head in doo doo.
And ever since then I stoppedall the fuck boy shit.
It's like I didn't need it andI just you were released.

Speaker 1 (54:10):
I was like released no therapy needed.
Save so much fucking money intherapy so you know, it's funny
too, because I feel like I betyou like for her for the rest of
her life.
You set a standard for her nowthat a lot of guys probably
can't live up to probably Ifucked over her, like you know
what I mean.
Like I beg you, swear to god youdon't anything.
Um, because, yeah, like Ialways see that, like I'm sure

(54:33):
we've all seen that here andthere on instagram like this guy
doing all this crazy stuff forthis girl, and I always go
straight to the commentsstraight to the comments and
it's always girls.
Be like.
My standards have officiallybeen raised.
No man does this.
This was scripted like all.

Speaker 2 (54:46):
And then all the guys are like fucking simp, fucking
loser, she's gonna, she'sprobably cheat on you right now
with the fuck boy it's almostlike no one's happy to see those
videos you know what I mean.
I go to the comments.

Speaker 1 (54:56):
Like girls are either like oh, like, my life isn't as
good as this.
I don't have a partner thatwould do that.
Guys are like damn, he's liketrying to make it seem like we
should do more work than we are,like fuck this.
And then, you know, the otherpeople are like it's not even
real, like it's like damn.
Yeah, actually I was on thisguy's page the other day.
If I find it, I'll send it toyou.
It's hilarious, and it was likehe is a fucking simp.

(55:18):
And then like I think that'sthe video I'm even thinking
about, where it was like gettingthe car ready for my passenger,
princess.
And it's like him putting thislike little basket of all of
these things together and I waslike he should be doing that for
his children.
You know what I mean.
Like I don't know, maybe that'sjust me.

Speaker 2 (55:36):
Some girls out here are like children.
I will say that, but it is whatit is.

Speaker 1 (55:41):
That's why they call them daddies, right?
No, I'm just kidding.
I don't understand the wholerelationship what?

Speaker 2 (55:46):
what do you look for?

Speaker 1 (55:47):
personality, wise and guys um, well, I guess like, um
, uh, like, emotional and socialintelligence is really
important.
Um, for me, I feel like,because I'm one of those people
like I will sometimes be in likesome really weird like ratchet
white trash activities, but thensometimes I'm in like nice

(56:08):
parties in Newport and stufflike that Like being able to
date someone that can like, orjust even like, you know,
potentially think about datingsomeone that would be able to
like handle going into all thesedifferent situations and
maintaining themselves,presenting Well, you know what I
mean Socially intelligent.
Yeah, yeah, well, you know.
Socially intelligent, yeah,yeah, emotional intelligence,
social intelligence, like, Iguess, also like like
intelligence, but also like theability to adjust to their

(56:30):
environment, and you know what Imean.
Um, I guess that's kind of themost important, kind of covers a
lot intelligence has becomeincreasingly.

Speaker 2 (56:41):
I've been a lot more picky on who I date and, like
you said, I agree it's not aboutyou went to college or you read
a bunch of books or somethinglike that, but somebody who's at
least interested in havingconversations about psychology
and why people the way they areand understands the people's
motivation behind doing things.
I just like I just get bored ifI can't talk to somebody about.

(57:05):
I don't know what I talked togirls about in my twenties.
I really don't even remember.
I'm like, what did I do for thefour hours that we talked
before we had sex?
Like I don't even remember.

Speaker 1 (57:14):
I remember for you, all you did was ask her
questions about herself, and sheprobably just talked about
herself.

Speaker 2 (57:20):
And this is why now we're on a podcast today where
you're just asking all these hotgirls questions about
themselves.

Speaker 1 (57:26):
No.
And this is why now we're on apodcast today, where you're just
asking all these hot girlsquestions about themselves.
No, I'm just kidding.
It finally worked.
No, I'm just kidding, butthat's kind of like what I feel
like I do when I'm in placeswhere.
I'm just like, oh my God, LikeI'm hanging out with these two
girls for the rest of the day,Like you know what I mean.
I'm just like all right.

(57:46):
I'm like, oh wow, I really justlike didn't really talk about
myself that much.
And then those are the peoplethat always end up liking me the
most where I don't really talkabout myself and all they do is
talk about themselves.
But I'm like I didn't reallybond with you because all you
did was talk about yourself, butyou felt like we had like a
really great conversationbecause all you did was talk
about yourself and that's whyyou don't remember, but other

(58:06):
people might.

Speaker 2 (58:07):
I, this one girl that I went on a date on I still
remember it was so funny.
So we're sitting at like atable where, like I was here and
she was like on like the corner, like not across from each
other, and she was just one ofthese talkers where she would
just go on and on and on and Igot kind of like a little bit
like annoyed and like boredafter a while because I'm like
it's just like too much aboutherself, right?
So I already know I'm not gonnaask her on a second date.

(58:28):
So I I decided to do like anexperiment where I just took my
phone out, I hit the timer and Iwas like if I don't say one
single word, how long will shetalk for?
oh, god it was like 25 minutes.
No, I didn't say.
It was like she would saysomething and it's like her
brain would like associate itand then she would like go into
this and then her brain wouldassociate again.

(58:49):
She wouldn't even finishstories, she would just get
halfway through one story andshe had all these like open
stories that and then she wouldfinish one of the stories and
then go back to the other one.
She didn't finish it.
It was bizarre.
It was so bizarre to me.

Speaker 1 (59:01):
Sounds a little neuro divergent.
you know what I mean I don'tknow, what that means um, like
someone that might be like on aspectrum oh, possibly, possibly
yeah, because you know what Imean, like because I've I
definitely met some of thosepeople too, like not saying she
was or wasn't, but like one ofthe people I met, that was kind
of like that, um, I would likesee them interact with other

(59:22):
people, and it was like exactlythe same and so it was like
actually maybe because, uh, shehad really trouble making eye
contact, like she was likestaring.

Speaker 2 (59:30):
That's why I said we're on the corner of the table
.
She wasn't looking at me, shewould like look over there.

Speaker 1 (59:34):
That's why she wasn't even picking up any social cues
, that you weren't fuckinginterested and then actually
I've done this before tooespecially when, like you know,
we're smoking weed, everybody'sstoned, everybody's kind of lazy
stoned.
For some reason I'm hyperstoned.
I'm like telling a story.
Then I realize nobody's reallyinterested and there's like a
silence and I'm like, oh no, nowI have to fill the silence and
I'm like nobody wants to hear metalk anymore.

(59:56):
But no one else is talking.
Like what the hell do I do?
that's hilarious so I wonderedto you about one point.

Speaker 2 (01:00:00):
She was like oh my god, this guy's not talking, I
just have to keep talking likewell, what is, um, let me ask
you this so tall tattoos,masculine emotional intelligence
, all these things right.
So you have like pretty highstandards when it comes to guys,
compared to most girls.
I think, well, what do you,which I think is good what do

(01:00:22):
you bring it to the table tomatch those standards?

Speaker 1 (01:00:27):
um, not to brag, but I'm financially independent.
I own my car, I own mymotorcycle, I have my own place.
I don't have any roommates likeI have my career set up like if
I want to be with someone, it'sbecause I want to be.
You know what I mean.
Like there's no date a guy cantake me on, that I can't take
myself on, I see.
So it's like, and another partof me wants to be.
You know what I mean.
Like there's no date.

Speaker 2 (01:00:45):
A guy can take me on that, I can't take myself on.

Speaker 1 (01:00:47):
So it's like I know another part of me wants to be
like I don't bring anything tothe table.
I'm not the fucking waitress.
But no, that's not true.

Speaker 2 (01:00:53):
Well, I'm not saying bring to the table in a.
I'm not a waitress.

Speaker 1 (01:00:59):
I don't even you're, so I don't know.
I feel like I bring a lot tothe table.
I mean, I know I'm not like thestereotypical, like you know,
victoria's Secret model, but Ido think, you know I'm
intelligent, I'm someone you canintroduce like to your parents.

Speaker 2 (01:01:12):
I'm someone that you know what I mean, you do seem to
have a deeper understanding onrelationships and the level of
self-awareness that I do feellike is missing from a lot of
people.

Speaker 1 (01:01:23):
Yeah, I might not be the best with relationships, but
I do have like a certain.
I feel like I'm highly aware ofmyself and I feel like what is
the way to put it?
Like a lot of people can't lookat themselves or situations
like unobjectively For me.
I'm just like, okay, logicallyspeaking, like what's happening
right now, instead of liketrying to look at it through my

(01:01:45):
own perspective.
But I don't know, maybe I'mjust stoned sometimes and I'm
getting it wrong too.
You never know but uh, it works,it works all right, we are
about out of time, oh my gosh, Igot some uh rapid fire
questions for you.

Speaker 2 (01:01:57):
Oh god, quick answers , uh, quick questions, quick
answers.
Favorite food bread, bread, alltypes of bread, any type of
bread so do you like, go toitalian places and, like you,
just can't wait for the, thebread to come out at the
beginning yeah, and I like likenice bread.

Speaker 1 (01:02:12):
Yeah, I'm just trying to think of like something I
could eat for the rest of mylife and not get sick of you
know like I love pasta.
I love salad, other things likethat, but yeah, that's funny.

Speaker 2 (01:02:20):
I've never heard everybody's like, oh, like ital,
like Italian or like sushi orsomething.

Speaker 1 (01:02:25):
Oh, they went vague, I went specific.

Speaker 2 (01:02:27):
I mean, if you love bread, everybody has their thing
.

Speaker 1 (01:02:30):
Oh, bird.

Speaker 2 (01:02:31):
Favorite candy.

Speaker 1 (01:02:33):
Oh, shoot, wow, that's actually a good question,
I guess.
Gummy bears, any sort of gummybears?

Speaker 2 (01:02:41):
Interesting, Favorite first date spot or activity.

Speaker 1 (01:02:50):
Ooh, gummy bears.
Interesting favorite, uh, firstdate spot or activity oh um,
motorcycle ride.
Then we stop somewhere likesunken city or go to um or take
a highway mojola and somethinglike that.
Yeah, dinner somewhere, epicwith a view yeah, yeah, yeah,
motorcycles are fun yeah, Ireally like them I.

Speaker 2 (01:03:04):
I drove one of my friends one time without a
license, which is not allowed,but it was fun I actually still
don't have my license, but itdoesn't matter, it's only been
like it's been less than a year,you're like we're fine, like I
can ride a bike.

Speaker 1 (01:03:18):
It's the same shit, well it's just like one like I.
I barely ever see motorcyclistsget pulled over and two, I
think it's just like a fix-itticket anyways, but don't quote
me on that what is the nexttravel destination?

Speaker 2 (01:03:31):
you haven't been to, but you really want to go um,
I'm actually really excited.

Speaker 1 (01:03:34):
In April I'm going to Italy for a wedding and yeah.
I feel like I'm the only onethat hasn't gone to the Amalfi
Coast, so I gotta hit that yeah,yeah, venice is overrated in
Italy.

Speaker 2 (01:03:43):
I like Florence a lot oh, okay, rome is good for,
like history and that kind ofthing.
I'm not as into that side oftraveling as most people are,
but yeah, no, we're not doingthe architectural walk or
anything.
I just don't want a fucking guyin an oversized shirt and
glasses teaching me about thislike culture.
I want to experience theculture by like meeting actual
people from yeah, I want to likedo what the locals do, yeah I

(01:04:06):
feel that way.
All right.
Well, we're out of time.
Where can people find you?
What's your uh?
Instagram tiktok, anything likethat yes, okay.

Speaker 1 (01:04:14):
So uh, at stephanie in real life on instagram and at
ringleader stephanie oninstagram as well and that's
stephanie with an.
I correct yes yes, I mean whenyou start typing or just type in
Stephanie Nicole, you mightfind it Then on TikTok.
It's also Stephanie in reallife.
Yeah, anybody that follows me,I'll follow everyone back.

Speaker 2 (01:04:32):
Awesome.
Well, this has been fun.
We'll have to do a round twosometime.

Speaker 1 (01:04:35):
Oh, really no way Awesome.

Speaker 2 (01:04:37):
Thanks for watching.