What Your Dating Choices Reveal About Your Self-Worth & How dating a Sugar Daddy led to Chlamydia ft. Vikki - Ep.093

Special thanks to Vikki for being a part of this episode of Unattainable Podcast Show 

We delve into the misconceptions about modern relationships and marriage, challenging traditional views of what makes partnerships healthy.

• Marriage isn't necessarily the natural next step - it's more important to build a healthy relationship first
• People who date successful partners often face unfair judgment and "gold digger" stereotypes
• Feeling an intense "gut pull" attraction might actually be a red flag rather than a sign of true compatibility
• A healthy relationship should make you feel calm and safe rather than constantly excited
• Money and status significantly impact dating dynamics, especially in major cities
• Networking in creative industries often comes with gender-specific challenges for women
• Many people develop unhealthy relationship expectations from reality TV and social media
• Finding authentic connection requires moving beyond superficial metrics of success and appearance
• Vulnerability and honest communication are essential for building lasting relationships

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
I feel like the idea of what marriage is to a lot of
people is really not healthy.
What are you doing?
Putting more weight into yourlife?

Speaker 2 (00:09):
I think girls take a lot of heat, for if they date
someone who's successful, whatyou have to say?

Speaker 1 (00:17):
it now.
He gave me chlamydia.
And.
I was like he made more moneythan me since the beginning and
he was just like didn't want tobuy me anything that he didn't
want to do.
I have a lot of struggle withconfidence for a long time and I
also didn't really know how tocommunicate well and I knew that
, so I knew that was going tocause a lot of harm.

(00:37):
They say if you're with a safeperson, then you might even feel
sleepy.
I still feel passion, like howI connect with them and how I'm
trying to like pursue all thethings I love doing, and like in
improving myself and being abetter person, and like by doing
that I'm being better for therelationship oh, I want to be
happy, right, but happy is thislike broad?

Speaker 2 (00:59):
it's not really a real emotion.

Speaker 1 (01:01):
It's like a broad spectrum that covers like joy,
excitement, contentment, likeit's kind of like very broad
guys are like oh, they must knowI'm into them and it's like
well, I mean, who is she to like?
She doesn't owe you, evennoticing that like I get.
If a guy's like hey, I'm reallyinterested in you and I would
like to get to know you welcometo unattainable glad to have you

(01:26):
with us.

Speaker 2 (01:26):
I'm your host, zach Evans, and first of all, thank
you to all of our listeners.
We have been getting a ton ofgrowth over the last couple
weeks, so we've got to thank youguys for that.
Today we've got a special gueston the show.
This is Vicky.
Vicky, why don't you go aheadand introduce yourself to the
audience?
Name what you do and your starsign?

Speaker 1 (01:48):
I'm Vicky Bred brota.
I'm actor, singer, comedian,and my star sign is scorpio.
Oh jesus, what's yours?

Speaker 2 (01:52):
the not toxic one oh, okay pisces, the best one
proven by science numerousstudies.
I can't disagree damn scorpiosare very fun, but but they're.
They always end poorly for me.

Speaker 1 (02:05):
They're bad for my mental health.

Speaker 2 (02:07):
Let's just say that.

Speaker 1 (02:09):
Got to pick and choose.

Speaker 2 (02:10):
Do you find yourself in toxic relationships often.

Speaker 1 (02:14):
I've been in a very healthy one for a long time.
Interesting.

Speaker 2 (02:17):
Yeah, so he's learned to put up with the toxic.

Speaker 1 (02:20):
He's also a Pisces.
Maybe that's why he justbalances out.

Speaker 2 (02:24):
To be fair, I used to be a very toxic individual back
back in my villain era, yeah,but I was like.
I was a professional fuck boy,not like these amateur gen z
fuck boys.

Speaker 1 (02:35):
You see, nowadays gen z fuck boys are definitely a a
breed.

Speaker 2 (02:39):
I'll fall for dudes who like ride bird scooters with
their fucking TikTok hair andlike have a bed that touches two
walls.

Speaker 3 (02:47):
That's awful.
Like a poor person Do not knowwhat a nightstand is Like stop
dating these fucking losers.

Speaker 1 (02:52):
I don't do those, but that's good.

Speaker 2 (02:54):
That's good, that's good, so you're in a
relationship now correct.
And how long has that beengoing on for?

Speaker 1 (03:02):
Over eight years.

Speaker 2 (03:03):
Eight years or Over eight years?

Speaker 1 (03:04):
Eight years or Over eight years?

Speaker 2 (03:06):
Damn, when did you guys meet High school?

Speaker 1 (03:11):
No, no, I was like I was like 24 or something like
that.
Okay, yeah, and it was like ata party.
Yeah, crazy, and what attractedyou to him in the first place.
Uh, he just seemed really sweetand gentle and then, like when
he saw me, his jaw dropped don'tlie to me I'm not lying girls

(03:34):
oh, I love guys who are nice andsweet and gentle.

Speaker 2 (03:37):
I like that's like all, that's like 90 percent of
fucking dudes out there theyjust seem nice.

Speaker 1 (03:42):
They're not really nice when it.
When push comes to shove.
They're not always reallyactually nice.
It's just.

Speaker 2 (03:48):
It's just a front I will say yeah, I know you mean a
lot of nice guys.
It's not that they're nice,they're just scared.
They're scared to say somethingthat might upset you and then
you're mad at them.
They're scared to setboundaries, you know.
Maybe they're scared to to makea move.
So they just kind of sit in thefriend zone and hope one night

(04:09):
you get drunk enough that yourealize they're always the one
like a taylor swift song andthey're finally gonna break up
with their boyfriend and getwith you taylor swift song.

Speaker 1 (04:18):
Oh my god, that's terrible it is what it is.

Speaker 2 (04:22):
Uh, okay, so nice, sweet.
And then eight years and it'sgoing well.

Speaker 1 (04:27):
You think you guys are gonna pull the trigger I
don't know um, I don't see thebig deal on marriage.
I think as long as it's like ahealthy relationship, that's the
most important thing yeah, Igot scared of marriage for a
couple reasons yeah, I don't sayscared of marriage, but
skeptical of marriage.

Speaker 2 (04:46):
When I went home to wisconsin right, I have like
group of friends in wisconsin.
Everybody gets married whenthey're fucking 21 years old and
has kids and does that wholething.
So most of my friends aremarried and I'm sitting down
with them one day and we're justchatting, they're like, zach,
you know, when are you gonna getmarried, bro?
You're gonna miss the boat.
You're not gonna be able tofind anybody.
Like, first of all, I'm doingfine, I'm doing just fine.

(05:08):
But I asked them I was like,okay, what is like your best day
?
What is your most amazing day?
And then one of them's like,yeah, you know, my wife's mom
takes the kids.
You know, my wife goes out withher girlfriends and we just
have poker night with the guys.
Watch the game.
I'm like your best night.

Speaker 1 (05:26):
I can do every single day of my life yeah, see, I I
feel like the idea of whatmarriage is to a lot of people
is really not healthy.
Like I feel like they skip that, like the understanding of what
a healthy relationship is, andjust go to marriage and then
they never define marriage, theyjust are given what marriage is

(05:46):
supposed to be, and I justdon't want to be, I don't know.
It's like there's so many more,so much more depth to like what
a relationship is supposed tobe for, like both people I agree
.

Speaker 2 (06:01):
I agree.
I think a lot of people.
It's just the next step.
It's like well, we've beendating for two years, what are
are we going to do?
Well, I guess we're gettingmarried, having a couple of kids
.

Speaker 1 (06:13):
I have friends who have kids and I'm like what are
you doing?
Like there's nothing wrong withkids, but like they're
struggling already financiallyand mentally and like every way.
And I'm like how are you goingto gonna?
What are you doing, puttingmore weight into your life?

Speaker 2 (06:28):
how old are you?
You're?
You're very confusing I knowI'm 32 okay, I'm 32 as well I
was gonna say like you're, Idon't know like did I math wrong
when I said 24?

Speaker 1 (06:39):
I might have.

Speaker 2 (06:40):
No, you math it right girl, math usually doesn't add
up, but you actually did itright.
Maybe Scorpios are different, Idon't know.
I'm surprised because you looklike you're like 21, but then
you have this attitude that'smuch more mature.

(07:02):
Let's just say that I'm like doI talk to you about?
Like investing, or like doingbali at disneyland?
Like it's very confusing Idon't know which route to take
this.

Speaker 1 (07:13):
And uh, the guy you're dating older, younger-
older, yeah, by like 15 years,13 years, 13 I don't remember
something like that got Gotcha.

Speaker 2 (07:23):
Yeah, you get it.
I owned a company in themodeling industry for 10 years
and it was so interestingbecause when girls would first
come in 18, 19, 20, we wouldcall it literally a hot guy face
, because they would always bedating young hot guy.
You know, like dangly earrings,they're like clones of each
other.

Speaker 1 (07:42):
Oh God.

Speaker 2 (07:46):
But all the most beautiful girls, when they hit
21, 22, 23, they would always bedating some normal looking dude
, like maybe dad bod, alwaysolder, like some dude, if you
like, put on a brown shirt andlike dropped off your ups
package.
You'd be like, okay, that makessense it's like one of those
things but these guys werealways very established and
successful and charismatic andhave the provider mentality and

(08:07):
all these other things that,like the young hot guys, never
had right, um, I don't know.

Speaker 1 (08:15):
I mean we've been called a power couple, like just
based off first impression andlike stuff like that, like we
both like dressing up and likewe both have a lot of hobbies
and like a lot of interests andstuff like that.
It's not just like, it's notjust stability, you know, it's
also like we both have a lot oflike peak interests in life yeah

(08:40):
it.

Speaker 2 (08:43):
It's interesting because I think girls take a lot
of heat, for if they're, theydate someone who's successful.

Speaker 1 (08:51):
I know I felt so self-conscious, especially if
they're older.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (08:54):
Because I might meet people that either think gold
digger, sugar daddy, somethinglike that, yeah.

Speaker 1 (08:58):
And I did feel self-conscious and I had like a
lot of talks with like somefriends and like one of my
girlfriends was like so what?
He's just like you, you guysare great together.
He just makes money.
What's the big deal?
And I guess, like in the past,like the previous relationship I
was in, the person made moneybut like he was slowly trapping

(09:21):
me.
He wanted me to quit my job butdidn't want to support me.
Like he you know what I mean hekind of was slowly revealing to
be abusive and I was alsoscared of that.
You know, like being told tolike rely on them and then not
have a life.

Speaker 2 (09:36):
Well, why did he want you to quit your job?

Speaker 1 (09:38):
My ex.
He was jealous of people thatwere apparently into me.
It was so stupid and that waslike my.
That was definitely one of myworst relationships.
It was crazy.
It was like the first person Idated who had money.
So he showed me the world.
We went traveling.
I was like this has neverhappened.

(09:59):
I've never traveled.
I grew up kind of poor andstuff like that.
Same yeah.
Yeah.
So I was like this is exciting,I don't think I was.
And like, looking back, I don'tthink I was really into him.
I think I was more into thelife that he was showing me.
It was just so exotic to me,growing up in a poor
neighborhood, poor home, poor,everything sheltered this is
what it's like to not fly middleseat on spirit.

Speaker 2 (10:21):
My god, you got a window seat, babe and, like man,
he was such a douchebag.

Speaker 1 (10:28):
He was such a douchebag he was.
He was definitely cheating onme, which, I mean, wasn't the
worst part, it was the fact hewas lying about it.
You know what I mean.
And then, like this is bad whatyou had.
To say it now he gave mechlamydia and I was like.
He was like I don't know why,but I can't have sex for a week

(10:49):
and I was like that sounds likean std and I was like 21 or 22
at that time.
So I was like huh, and he waslike I don't know what it is.
And then I got tested.
I'm like it's a fucking std.
What do you mean?
Like what?
You're obviously fuckingsomeone.

Speaker 2 (11:04):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, oh, I got it from the toilet seat,
babe.
Like the fuck are you talkingabout?

Speaker 1 (11:09):
But like the fact that I like was so naive enough
to try to even want to believethat was insane, I just really
wanted the life you know.
The lifestyle, yeah, I was likeit can't be true.

Speaker 2 (11:21):
It's interesting, I got in an argument with my mom
the other day because, she'slike, zach, you're out in
hollywood, like you're alwaysdating these like models,
actresses, blah, blah, blah, andshe's very conservative
wisconsin mom.
And she's like you should datea nice girl from church and just
care about personality andthat's all.
And I'm like, all right, mom,you want me to date an ugly girl
?
She's like, no, no, not an uglygirl, just like focus on

(11:44):
personality.
And I'm like, okay.
So I'm like, mom, there existsbeautiful girls with great
personalities, correct, and thenthere exists ugly girls with
great personalities, yeah, so ofcourse, I'm going to choose.
Like two plus two equals four.
What do you want me to do?
Of course I want beauty andpersonality, which is rare to
find you can have it all it's.

Speaker 1 (12:05):
It's definitely out there.
Like I understand, it takes alot of effort to like be smart
and also a lot of effort to likelook good and it's like hard to
combine those two, but likeit's out there and that's why
like for girls I'm like, yeah, Iget it, personality is the most
important.

Speaker 2 (12:20):
Great, fine, I agree with you.
But then there's like rich guysof great personalities you
found one of them.
And then there's like brokeguys.

Speaker 1 (12:27):
He's not rich but he's doing well for himself.
It's doing well.
We've been up and downfinancially in the eight years,
for sure gotcha, gotcha.

Speaker 2 (12:35):
What does he do?
Home loans home what home loansoh yeah, that's.
I mean like that, you can makemoney in that, for sure.

Speaker 1 (12:41):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (12:42):
Yeah, interesting.
Did you ever experience thesugar daddy scene when you were
back in your?

Speaker 1 (12:49):
dating pages?
I didn't, but I knew girls thatdid that and I was like, how do
you have the balls to do that?
I was so scared to do itBecause they'd be like oh, that
guy took me on a trip, didn'ttouch me.
I'm like I don't believe you.
I don't know, I don't believenone of these.

(13:12):
I was too scared.
I was like you went to anisland with this guy who paid
for everything and didn't touchyou and like, didn't put any
pressure on you, and like butyou're on an island alone with
him, like you're, you're trappedwith him.
I don't know, I guess I'mclaustrophobic in that sense.
You know, I don't want to bestuck in any kind of unsafe
situation.

Speaker 2 (13:26):
That's hypothetical yeah, I just, I knew a girl who,
like she was kind of like asugar daddy pimp because she
would like she had like allthese sugar daddies, but then
she would like help them getgirls or something like that.
And she told me she's like Zach, all these girls who say, oh
yeah, he just takes me up todinner and that's it.
She's like that's like 1% ofsugar daddies, like 99%, are

(13:49):
like, nah, I'm trying to get mydick wet too.
Like it's not, this isn't thegame.
And of course and I get it, ifyou're a girl, you'd probably
lie about it to, like, you know,make it seem better.
And X, y, z.

Speaker 1 (13:59):
Well, I, I knew girls that also didn't lie about it,
and I respect it, you know.
Like that's what they're doing.
That's fine, Totally.
I mean power to them.
I'm too scared to do it.
And they get everything handedto them that way.
That's fine if they're happywith it.
Yeah, I just couldn't.

(14:19):
It's too intimidating Toointimidating.

Speaker 2 (14:24):
I got accused of being a sugar daddy once.

Speaker 1 (14:26):
Yeah, I feel like any guy with money would be accused
of it.
Like, for sure I was mad,though it's one of my good
friends.

Speaker 2 (14:33):
She's like the master of the sugar baby.
She has like all the she haslike ten sugar daddies.
It's crazy.
She has like all the infinitystones, like one I love.
I love hearing those stories.
It's crazy.
It's like a business, like sheneeds a secretary to like
organize shit for her, you know?
yeah, it's so cool to hear aboutand she was talking because,

(14:53):
like, I was raised like verychivalrous, right, my dad was
very old school.
So it's like, yeah, like if Itake a girl on a date, like I'm
paying, like if we're walking onthe sidewalk, I'm, like you
know, walking on the car side,so if the car comes, I can, like
you know, stop it with one hand, protect my girl with the other
, like chivalry, you know.
So if I'm traveling and I havea girlfriend, like I'm paying

(15:14):
for everything, like I'm notlike, hey, babe, did you get the
Venmo request?
Like it just, it just feelsweird to me.
It would feel very, it wouldmake me feel like not a man, you
know what I mean.
So she found out about that andin front of all my friends,
she's like yeah, zach, you're asugar daddy too, did you know
that?
And I'm like and then she goesshe's like Zach, every guy's a

(15:37):
sugar daddy, right?
Either you pay for drinks, youpay for dinner, you pay for
trips, you pay for sex.

Speaker 1 (15:45):
She's like there's just high class and low class,
that's all it is.

Speaker 2 (15:46):
That's hilarious, and I was like I didn't have a good
like comeback at the time, soit's kind of I wasn't mad that
she accused me, I was mad thatshe kind of like outsmarted me
in the moment.

Speaker 1 (15:56):
Yeah, that's so funny Wow.

Speaker 2 (15:59):
But.
But I do think it's more oflike okay, what's the context?
Is she coming on the trip onlyfor the trip and she has no
feelings for you?
Or is she already yourgirlfriend?
She was already in love withyou to begin with and now also
you're paying for a trip.
I think there's a difference.

Speaker 1 (16:14):
Right, there is a difference and I don't think
there's anything wrong witheither, as long as it's mutual.
You know, mutual agreement,that's my line, you know.
Um, that's my line, you knowyou can't be like tricking
people, I don't know.
That just seems, feels dirty tome, um, but uh, yeah, I mean I

(16:34):
feel like, oh, that was anotherthing.
So with my ex, who, like,wanted me to quit my job but
didn't want to support me likehe made more money than me since
the beginning and he was justlike, didn't want to buy me
anything that he didn't want todo- In terms of what Like.

Speaker 2 (16:49):
Give me an example.

Speaker 1 (16:50):
So like he took me on trips to Vegas and I was like
cool, vegas first time, whatever.
But I had no say in what we did, like I had to do whatever he
wanted to do.
And then if I wanted to gosomewhere else was like okay,
well, then go, I'll meet yousomewhere else.

Speaker 2 (17:09):
I'm like you're not even worried about me I mean, I
can understand why he wouldn'twant to like pay for you if
you're going to do somethingthat you want to do and he's not
coming to me.
That makes sense because it'slike okay, here's the plan but
then he didn't want me to workyeah, see that, that's where it
gets a little tricky yeah,exactly, we're gonna fucking

(17:30):
starve it's like, it's likeslowly turning into like a pet
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
How long did you the toxic one?
How long did that?

Speaker 1 (17:40):
last, maybe like 10 months okay almost a year.
I feel like there was twomonths where it was like we
broke up like a fuck ton and Idon't know.
Yeah, it was like reaching thebad and so.

Speaker 2 (17:53):
So I'm always curious .
So like because because, like Isaid, I I went from like super
nice guy simp, like don't knowwhat the fuck I'm doing, get
friends on every day of my life,and then went to like super
fuck boy, sociopath, narcissist,gaslighting everybody, and then
I'm now I'm kind of likematured out of that stage and

(18:14):
I'm kind of just like okay,gentlemen stage.
You know what I mean yeah, and Ialways wonder, because when I
was a fuck boy, I was a verylike, honest fuck boy, like I
would tell girls I don't want arelationship, I don't want to be
exclusive, that's nothing wrongwith that.
And they never believed me.
Like they would always like,like like I would end up hooking

(18:34):
up with some girl, they wouldfind out, and then they get like
really mad at me and I'm like Itold you Right, so okay, this
is so okay.
This is what I wonder.
So when you would date like aguy that was like a fuck boy,
did you kind of know in the backof your mind?

Speaker 1 (18:48):
Yeah, he's a fuck boy .
I didn't date too many fuckboys.

Speaker 2 (18:51):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (18:52):
At all Like the one that was toxic, I don't.
I think I was just blinded byall the you know, excited, new,
exciting, new things that heshowed me.
Know, excited, new, exciting,new things that he showed me.
Um, and at first I, when I wasseeing him, I was like I don't
know if I want to be seriouswith him, and then I just got
blindsided and then I was like,oh no, I don't know.

(19:14):
I think I just got likeattached to all the highs, you
know, um, because when it ended,it was more like confusing on
my mental health.
You know, like, because he'slying.
I'm like, why do I want tobelieve this?
When it ended, it was more likeconfusing on my mental health,
you know, because he's lying.
I'm like, why do I want to?

Speaker 2 (19:29):
believe this.
So you think subconsciously,you wanted to believe it so you
could maintain that lifestyle,do you think?

Speaker 1 (19:34):
Yeah.
And then I was like, well, whatdo I really want?
And like it came down to, Iwanted to actually have a
connection.
I wanted someone I could trustand believe and like, talk to
and be like, because he would.
He would just call me a liarabout things.
I would tell him about my lifebecause my upbringing was rough
and a lot of like unbelievablethings happened to me and I

(19:54):
couldn't talk to him about thatbecause he'd be like that didn't
happen.
He would just gaslight me aboutmy own past because it was so
extreme and I was like this is,this is not right that's crazy
yeah, but I didn't realize how,how, how awful it was until
towards the end.
For a lot of reasons, yeahmm-hmm.

Speaker 2 (20:17):
Because sometimes girls will tell me oh, I met
this guy.
He's such a great guy and I'lltake one look at his Instagram
and you can tell.
And I'm like this is a class, afuckboy.
All the signs, the red flags,are fucking red.
I'm like how do you not knowthis?
But I think there are somegirls out there that they do

(20:41):
love it.
They love the excitement andthe roller coaster.
Does he like me?
Does he not like me?

Speaker 1 (20:46):
yeah, all the the reality show emotions yeah, I
think they do, I, I almost I.
I think some people learn howto go about their love life
through reality shows, becauseI'm actually.
That's a good point I I swearthey do.
Because I'm like where did youget this like motive?
Like it just doesn't make sensein the real world.
The only time this happens isin reality shows.

(21:08):
I'm like are you picking yourpersonality from a reality show?
Because that's insane.

Speaker 2 (21:14):
I mean, so many girls get, that's what they watch all
day Kim Kardashian, this LoveIsland, blah, blah, blah.
It makes sense, yeah.
But then a lot of them watchlike the serial killer shit too.
I guess the two differences butmaybe that's why girls always
end up falling for sociopathsmaybe they watch these fucking
serial killer shows and theystart subconsciously developing

(21:37):
a type I don't know, I can onlyspeak for myself.

Speaker 1 (21:41):
Um, I used to watch a lot of that too when I lived at
home.
I watched it because that'swhat my mom watched and that's
just like what we did together.
I never watch it really anymore.
I never, I don't know.
I guess I'm strange.
Like most of my dating history,I kind of made sure I had the
upper hand somehow or another,like I had a toxic.

(22:01):
I was probably the toxic one ina lot of ones.
Um, and obviously I've gottenaway from that and realized,
like, what I really want andwhat I don't want, and what I
don't want is to hurt anotherperson, you know, um, but yeah,
that has been my journey withthat.
I feel like for me, those twothings are not the same.

Speaker 2 (22:19):
So then, in your earlier dating life, what was
like your normal type?
Let's do.

Speaker 1 (22:25):
looks first, let's do looks first oh God, Okay.
So I'm thinking like highschool right Dating.
Okay, that's like when Istarted dating Skinny.

Speaker 2 (22:39):
You like the skater dudes?

Speaker 1 (22:41):
Skater looking dudes.
They weren't even skaters likeyou don't even have a fucking
talent to skate.

Speaker 2 (22:48):
You're just skinny.

Speaker 1 (22:48):
You just don't go to the gym they were all different,
like one was a runner, one wasa writer, one was um was another
one, and then the ones thatwere good never lasted because I
felt like I was.
They were too good for me, youknow what I mean.
So I left because I was like Iwas.
They were too good for me, youknow what I mean.
So I left because I was like,oh, I'm just going to hurt them
and I don't want to do that, andI just tried to have some kind
of control.

Speaker 2 (23:09):
I don't know if I believe you.

Speaker 1 (23:10):
Why.

Speaker 2 (23:13):
When girls say, oh, I left because he was too good
for me or he was such a greatguy Any girl would be so lucky
to have him, just not me to mewhat that says is you're just
not that attracted to him, notnecessarily in books, but I was
self-sabotaging, um, I also likedidn't.

Speaker 1 (23:33):
I had a lot of struggle with confidence for a
long time, um, and I also didn'treally know how to communicate
well, and I knew that.
So I knew that was going tocause a lot of harm and I don't
know why I still dated at all,like I really just shouldn't
have dated period.
But yeah, I did feel likepeople were too good for me and
I was just going to like, well,I was scared of ruining my

(23:56):
reputation because I knew thatwas a big risk.
So I guess I got with peoplewho I didn't think would ruin me
if I exposed myself, because Iknew I was vulnerable, because I
was a bad person, because I washurting so much and I had a lot
of healing I needed to do.

Speaker 2 (24:12):
So it sounds like you went with kind of a safe option
.

Speaker 1 (24:15):
Yes, yes, that's exactly what it was.

Speaker 2 (24:18):
I see yeah.

Speaker 1 (24:20):
So when I started dating, I went with the safe
option.

Speaker 2 (24:22):
Okay, but again, obviously I don't know you that
well yeah.
But, it just seems like when Ihear girls say that it means I
went to the guy who's like, youknow, he's not edgy, he doesn't
have that dangerous kind of likemanly essence to him and
because of that he's safe andhe's not going to break your
heart, he's not going to do allthese things.

(24:43):
But then I think for most girlsthey like there's something
missing in terms of the gutlevel attraction of just like
the more like masculine,feminine, just like polarizing
attraction, or is it not likethat?

Speaker 1 (24:57):
So I know for me, uh, if there's like's like a, like
a really intense like connectionthat you're like you're talking
about, where it's like a, Ifeel like that's a red flag.
Have you heard of that?
no explain and I've had thatconfirmed by like doing some
more research and like seeingquotes and seeing other people
discuss it.
Yeah, so that is a red flag inmy experience, and I've I've

(25:19):
seen it in my life too.
Um, like the toxic relationshipthat was a gut pull and that
just ended badly.
Um, because I feel like whenyou're with the right person,
you should feel calm, you shouldfeel calm at ease and, like
they say, if you're with theright, the safe, a safe person,
then you might even feel sleepy.

Speaker 2 (25:42):
Do you want to feel sleepy?

Speaker 1 (25:43):
No, it's not about that.

Speaker 2 (25:46):
I don't know, I'm trying to picture.

Speaker 1 (25:50):
Chemically.
That's what happens.
Your nervous system will be sorelieved that it could literally
make you feel like you'resleepy.

Speaker 2 (26:01):
Not that that's the goal, to feel sleepy but but
then do you feel like you'remissing the passion and the but
I feel passion in my life.

Speaker 1 (26:12):
otherwise, I mean, I still feel passion in how I
connect with them and how I'mtrying to pursue all the things
I love doing and in improvingmyself and being a better person
and like by doing that I'mbeing better for the
relationship I see interesting.

Speaker 2 (26:31):
Yeah, what's up, fuck boy maybe I gotta stop dating
these toxic women and startsleeping more, start sleeping
more.

Speaker 1 (26:40):
That reminds me of a lyric from um, ah, what's his
name?
Uh, what's the name of thatsong?
Uh, the lyric goes I shouldn't.
I should have just took a napthat day instead of met you.
It's not that, but it's likesomething like that.

Speaker 2 (27:03):
It sounds like a country song, it's not, I guess.
What I think it is is.
We all have primary driveremotions.
Have you heard of this primarydriver emotion?

Speaker 1 (27:14):
Primary driver emotions.

Speaker 2 (27:16):
Emotion, yeah, it's like the main emotion that you
like in your life.
So everybody says, oh, I wantto be happy, right.
But happy is this like broad?
It's not really a real emotion.
It's like a broad spectrum thatcovers like joy, excitement,
contentment, like it's kind oflike very broad, right.
So for me, my primary driver,emotion, is excitement.

(27:38):
Like like my entire playlist islike fucking hype music all the
time.
I just like I go to the gymhype music.
I like go in my car hype musicI I don't enjoy.
Just like relaxing and like Idon't know people like like
meditating, I'm like I'm sofucking bored like I fucking
hate it so much.

Speaker 1 (27:58):
There's so many types of meditation, but I can
understand if someone doesn'tlike it this girl I met.

Speaker 2 (28:04):
Um, we went on this mexico city trip and I get there
and she's like you know, whenyou get here I'll leave the door
open or whatever you know, uh,just walk in, we don't have to
deal with like the keys andeverything.
I'm like okay, dope, so get tothe airbnb and I open the gate
and there's like know a path tothe house and there's like the
doors open at the house, right.
And I'm like yo, vanessa, noanswer, just silence, right.

(28:29):
And then I get closer and Ikind of like creak the door open
.
I'm like Vanessa, and there'snothing.
And this is my first time inMexico City and I like heard
rumors was dangerous dangerousespecially like tourists like
okay, I'm like what if theyfound the airbnb?
they're like, oh yeah, zach'scoming, we're gonna rob him,
blah, blah like something likethat and I'm like nervous and I
look around the corner and itscares the shit out of me.

(28:51):
There's like these 10 girlsjust fucking, like like I am
legend, just zombies, just likestaring at the fucking wall.
I'm like vanessa what the fuckand she's like we're meditating
and they just sat there for 20minutes and stare at the wall.
And then I see her, uh uh.
I was talking to her later andshe's like, yeah, zach, I went

(29:13):
on this meditation retreat likeshe's super into it and she goes
on a retreat.
It's two thousand dollars to goto somebody else's house and
stare at their walls all likethe whole weekend or whatever
the fuck.
To be fair, not just walls, shewould like stare at the walls
and they go outside.
They stare at the tree, comeback, stare at the table.
They just like stare at shit.
And I'm like vanessa, I have somany walls I don't even use.

(29:38):
I would have charged you like500 bucks.
You could look at as many wallsas you want to.

Speaker 1 (29:42):
I feel like that's, that's the wrong kind of
meditation.
There's lots of different typesof meditation.

Speaker 2 (29:49):
My meditation is going to the fucking gym and
lifting some fucking weightsthat works.

Speaker 1 (29:53):
That works, I mean seriously.
That is a form of meditation.
There's movement meditation,there's not just still
meditation do you do meditationI've tried a lot of different
kinds.
Yeah, um, I've tried differenttypes of yoga.
I've tried like, yeah, likestill, meditations I've tried.
I mean, I used to be abodybuilder and stuff like no
way or be into bodybuilding.

(30:14):
I never competed because this iswhen I had like low confidence
but I had the body for andeveryone was like you should
compete and I was like no, Icannot.
But uh, looking back, I shouldhave, I definitely should have
interesting but I have a lot.
I have a lot of fitnessinformation in my brain because
of it do you still lift weights,work out that kind of thing?

(30:36):
I have chilled out um.
I work out very little um now,but uh, yeah, I work out bare
minimum.
Now I'll do like a couple lightworkouts, like without weight
sometimes.
I don't know, I've just beenbusy with other things like my
comedy, my acting or like music.

Speaker 2 (30:57):
Yeah, how did you get into comedy?

Speaker 1 (31:01):
comedy.
Um, where do I begin?
So I I actually really wantedto do comedy in high school, uh,
but I didn't really tell anyone, I didn't really try it, and
then I tucked it away and thendidn't talk about it at all.
And then a couple years ago Iwas like I'm starting to get the
confidence, I think I want todo it.

(31:21):
And then a year ago I startedtelling everyone I'm going to do
it, I'm going to do it, youknow, putting it out there in
the world.
And then I ran into someone whowas like oh, I'm starting a new
open mic.
If you're serious, I'll let youknow.
When I started, felix Yazalino,and he kept his word and I

(31:42):
started writing stuff in thattime period between meeting him
and when he hit me up.
And so when he hit me up, I Iput it all together in like a
note, memorized it.
I memorized it within the eighthours and then performed it the
next day nice.

Speaker 2 (31:57):
How'd it go the first time?

Speaker 1 (31:58):
I got a couple laughs and people were like this is
your first time, Like theydidn't believe me, and I was
like, yeah, I don't know, Idon't know, I don't know what
the level was.
You know if I was good or not.
But looking back, I guess I wasdoing a lot better than a lot
of people who start.

Speaker 2 (32:14):
Well, I mean, cause now you have like dates right,
Like tour dates.
I thought I saw on your thingyeah so, like, how did you go
from like starting and you'reonly what?
Nine months in?

Speaker 1 (32:22):
seven seven months in and yeah, that's a very or
eight.
I took two months off, so if Idon't include the two months off
, it's like five months.

Speaker 2 (32:32):
I'm pretty new yeah, I mean, but to get actual dates
where you're touring mostcomedians, that's a year yeah, I
started.

Speaker 1 (32:39):
So I started booking shows.

Speaker 2 (32:41):
Uh, two months in how did you do that?

Speaker 1 (32:44):
um, I went to a lot of mics.
I uh networked a lot.
I networked my ass off.
I made sure people knew who Iwas.
You know, um, that's it.
I just, I work on my stuff, youknow also, I, I spend almost
every day writing, rewriting myjokes, practicing my jokes.
Yeah, now my memory is likereally good because of stand-up,

(33:07):
because I'm always memorizingstuff.
You're forced into it, yeah.

Speaker 2 (33:11):
You can't just rely on our phones for everything.

Speaker 1 (33:13):
No, you can't, Not for stand-up.
It's bad.
It's a big learning curve,though.
You learn what's correct,etiquette and what's wrong, and
then who's cool, who's not, howpeople treat you when they find
out you have shows and you'renew.
That was bad, that was rough.

Speaker 2 (33:32):
What do you mean by that?

Speaker 1 (33:34):
Because a lot of people are jealous.
People are like oh, I've beendoing this for five years and
you have more shows than me andyou just started.
There's a lot of side commentsthat come in and it's not cool.
It's not cool, but since thenI've been stepping back from a
lot of people and then figuringout who to filter better does

(33:55):
some?

Speaker 2 (33:55):
do you get resentment the fact that you're like a
pretty girl doing stand-up?

Speaker 1 (34:00):
you know, sometimes I do, uh, I don't, I I don't know
if I've gotten any of that fromother girls, but guys, yeah,
guys will be like, oh, it'sbecause you're, it's because
you're attractive, that's whythat producer put you on the
show.
Um, and then I can feel it, Ican feel it.
Some people are like how didyou get on that show?

(34:21):
And like there's a lot of.

Speaker 2 (34:24):
There's a tone in their voice.

Speaker 1 (34:25):
There's a tone in their voice and there's a lot,
there's a lot of talk about oh,people like slept their way to
the top.
You know that's always in thisindustry and I feel like that's
what they're thinking of, Likehow did you get on that show?
And I'm like I did whateveryone would do like.
So there's this one big showcalled grapes and giggles and I

(34:46):
think I would say that's thebiggest one I've done.
Like that had like 150 peopleor 200 people, I don't know, it
was a big room.
Um, my favorite show so far andthe way you do it is you just
do the open mic and then the theproducer asks the audience
members at the end like who wasyour favorite?
Who stood out?
And people called my name acouple times so they put me on.
Simple as that.

Speaker 2 (35:07):
Let the people decide yeah.

Speaker 1 (35:09):
And there's people who haven't been on and they're
very sour about that.
And then they found out I goton and I could just feel it.
They're like what did you do toget on?

Speaker 2 (35:23):
Like get on, like you're new.
It's interesting and I neverunderstood this until the first
like very beautiful girl I dated.
She was like a fashion model.
I was 25 years old and beforethat I looked at hot girls in la
the way most people do.
Oh, your life is so easy freedrinks, free dinners, more
opportunities, free tulum trips,blah, blah, blah.
And then when I dated her, Irealized that it's like every

(35:46):
advantage comes with a flip side.
Like every opportunity like hasinvisible strings attached and
you have to figure out whatthose are and you know what I
mean.
It's like every.
It's like you never know whatgirls like are like fuck with
you and what girls are secretlyjealous of you, talking shit
behind your back.
You never know what guys aretrying to fuck you and and if

(36:09):
you reject them, they're gonnaget butthurt, even though
they're like oh, you're friendsand I.
I think that there's likeadvantages and disadvantages and
because of that like I thinkit's an advantage you being
attractive in terms of likeprobably way easier to network,
for example.
But now you have to deal witheasier to network.
But how many of these guys I'mnetworking don't actually care

(36:33):
about my comedy, they're justtrying to hook up with me, but
then if you can navigate that,you can use your advantage as
long as you, but then you stillhave to deal with the
disadvantage of being a chick so, yeah, it's, it's definitely a
lot of pros and cons.

Speaker 1 (36:46):
Um, I mean, I I feel like when I started, I got a lot
of awkward responses like hi,I'm, I'm, I'm Vicky, you know.
And people would be like oh, hi, like, why are you talking to
me?
I'm like, oh, I'm Vicky Breda,you know.
And people would be like oh hi,like, why are you talking to me
?
And I'm like oh, I'm a comic,I'm not just some random girl
talking to you.
That's what it felt like, youknow.

Speaker 2 (37:07):
Well, as a guy it almost feels like if a girl's
that forward, you're kind oflike what's the catch?

Speaker 1 (37:12):
here.

Speaker 2 (37:12):
Yeah, that's exactly how they look to me, and that's
how it is, because you're likenah, ah, that can't be that easy
.
You know what I mean.
It's crazy.

Speaker 1 (37:19):
That's exactly how they responded to me, how they
looked.

Speaker 2 (37:25):
Some of them admitted to me.

Speaker 1 (37:25):
that's how they felt about me, as I have stayed in
comedy and I'm like, wow, that'sreally fucked up.
I literally said hi andintroduced myself, and that's it
.

Speaker 2 (37:33):
It's crazy.
I had a girl slide into my DMsone time.
It was like when my music wasfirst doing well, when my music
was first doing well and likepreviously before that, like I
had like no followers, no cloutor whatever, and it was like
anytime a girl slid in, Iremember getting excited and
then it'd be like oh yeah, sosign up for my only fans here.
Okay, this is a fucking scam.
I got it.
So then one time it was likereal and she's like hey, like

(37:56):
you know, I just thought youwere cute, or blah, blah, blah.
I'm like here we go with thewhole and then she was actually
just a normal real girl and Iwas like wait I was like, I was
like really, I was like mom.
Finally it happened.

Speaker 1 (38:11):
The hard work is paying off oh god I mean, yeah,
that must suck more on the guy'sside for sure, because I mean,
I get, I literally get guysmessaging me just flat out
saying they want to be my sugardaddy.
Oh, I'm sure you get that allthe time and at least they
filter it right away, but I'mlike they're going to kidnap me

(38:32):
and kill me.
I can't, I can't.

Speaker 2 (38:35):
It's interesting.
I dated a girl one time.
It was funny.
It was so funny.
So I'm dating her for likethree weeks.
So my guy friends are like oh,who's this girl you've been
seeing?
Show me your instagram bubble.
Is she hot, blah, blah.
So I show one of my friends herinstagram.
He's like yo, I know her.
And he's like fuck that girl,she's a bitch.
And I was like confused.

(38:56):
I was like wait, she's like thebiggest sweetheart.
I know like what are youtalking about?
And I didn't understand ituntil we went out one night to
fucking Warwick for her friend'sbirthday and I see a guy come
up and try to hit on her and Isee her very directly kind of
like thanks back, turn Like very, which would come off as rude

(39:16):
to a guy.

Speaker 1 (39:17):
Who's like who's trying to hit on her, though?
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (39:22):
But then at the same time it like okay, what do you
want her to do?
Be nice and polite, this guythinks he has a shot.
Then lead him on for 30 minutestalking about boring ass
fucking conversation she doesn'towe him anything.

Speaker 1 (39:30):
First of all, I agree like at all.
And I mean, is he literallyjust like, hey, what's up like
all obnoxious?

Speaker 2 (39:40):
uh, no, it seemed like a normal okay but I think
it's still like.

Speaker 1 (39:44):
I get it like I would rather honestly, if I like was
talking to a girl, I'd ratherhave her just be honest if she's
not into me yeah, I'm fuckingwasting my time talking to her
for 30 minutes when I could betalking to some other chick but
also I feel like sometimes guysare like oh, they must know I'm
into them and it's's like well,I mean, who is she to like?
She doesn't owe you, evennoticing that, like I get.

(40:07):
If a guy's like, hey, I'mreally interested in you and I
would like to get to know youstraight to the point, no, no.

Speaker 2 (40:12):
That's the worst fucking pickup line I've ever
heard in my life.
Hey, like what?
Hey, I'm interested.
What is this?
A job interview, girl?
Girls give the worst it.
I never take dating advice orrelationship advice from girls.
They give the worst fuckingadvice ever and they're the
worst wingman.
You would think girls would bethe wingman.

(40:32):
They're horrible.

Speaker 1 (40:34):
They're so bad I don't even know what advice I'd
give to a guy if they wanted tohit on a girl.

Speaker 2 (40:39):
Um, let me tell you a story, okay so I'm going to
this malibu party this is backin my villain era and I'm
driving.
And one of my best friend, I'mdriving his girlfriend because,
like they're driving separateand long story, so she's in the
front seat.
I'm telling her all the storiesabout my villain era.
She's like dying, laughing atlike half of them, and she's

(40:59):
getting excited.
She's like I'm going to be yourwingman at this party.
It's going to be so much fun.
And I'm like no, no, pleasedon't.
I don't need you intervening inmy fuckboy strategies.
Okay, so we get there.
I'm like talking to some girl.
She's like flirting with me.
I'm like leaned up against thething.

(41:27):
I'm like looking cool right andthen all of a sudden, this girl
comes up and she like broughtthis, this other girl who wasn't
even attracted by the way andshe's like oh, oh, this is my
friend zach.
Um, he's the guy I was tellingyou about.
He's like the most nicestsweetheart I've ever met.
You, you gotta get to know him.
And I just watched both of thegirls faces just fucking lose
any sense of attraction thatthey would have had for me, oh
my God.
And literally the girl goes aw,that's so sweet.

(41:50):
I mean you just made me getrejected by an ugly girl that I
didn't even talk to.
Like how much worse of awingman could you be, oh my.

Speaker 1 (42:00):
God but then, I've been in those other girls'
situations like position.

Speaker 2 (42:04):
It's the worst.
It's the worst.

Speaker 1 (42:06):
Because I think when I'm them, I'm like, oh, she's
fucking him or fucked him ordated him, like I don't know why
.
That's just what it feels like,I think it just makes you look
like a pushover.
Like you're like you need helpgetting girls.

(42:26):
Like, please date this guy.
He's so fucking lonely becausehe sucks, or something like that
.
Yeah, it comes off almost.
I could see that it's been awhile since that happened so I'm
trying to remember.

Speaker 2 (42:30):
But no, that does actually do that for sure.
But I I use it to my advantagebecause you know, I take the
universe whatever it gives meand I fucking spin it to my
advantage how did you do that sothree hours later?
in the party because I'm really.
I'm sitting down on the couchwith this completely other girl
Right, and this guy comes sitdown next to us Hot fucking guy,
young, six pack, like goodlooking Right, and we're talking

(42:50):
and I can kind of tell he'ssaying he's being polite to me
but he's trying to swoop in forthe girl Right.
So he gets up after a while.
It's like oh, I'm getting adrink, do you want something?
He?
I was like oh, I'm getting adrink, do you want something?
He asked.
The girl doesn't ask me.
I'm like this motherfucker,obviously I see what you're
doing.
So he leaves and then I go tothe girl.
I'm like oh yeah, that's Mike.
He's the nicest sweetheartyou'll ever meet.

(43:12):
You should definitely get toknow him and just watch your
face fucking lose attractionhilarious I'm like jordan, the
finals.
You can't stop me.

Speaker 1 (43:19):
I just use the universe to my advantage I've
also had that happen to me where, like the guy is trying to
wingman, like for the guy and Ilose interest in both of them
interesting.

Speaker 2 (43:30):
So you do have a threesome, or what?
Huh, you were interested inboth of them no, I lose interest
oh, I see, I see like I'm justlike.

Speaker 1 (43:39):
Obviously, both of them have motives that's how I
see it.

Speaker 2 (43:43):
Yeah, I think there's a way to talk up your friends
in a way that's like it has tobe really casual and really
honest yeah, and it can't belike, hey, so my friend's really
cool.
It has to be very like.
You have to like, just like,paint a picture of who your
friend is without telling themwho your friend is, otherwise, I
agree, it makes it worse yeah,it has to be like oh uh, so who

(44:06):
are you here with?
and then it's like casual leadto like, oh yeah, these friends
I've known for a while, and then, honestly, okay, you know what
the best wing woman would be,what and you're not gonna want
to hear it, but it's true if Iwas talking to a girl and I had
this is how I would like trainmy wing woman if I was like in a
competition or something, shewould come up she would say,

(44:29):
zach, where have you been?
I've been looking for you, likethat.
Then I would have her and andtouch, like touch my chest or
touch my arm, or something.
She would say, zach, where haveyou been?
I've been looking for you, likethat.
Then I would have her and touchmy chest or touch my arm, or
something like that.
Then I'd have her look at thegirl, kind of like, look her up
and down like that and thenleave what?
Because that would make the girljealous and think, wait, hold

(44:50):
on.
Who's this girl?
Is she fucking?

Speaker 1 (44:52):
her.
That's weird.

Speaker 2 (44:55):
That shit would work like gang.

Speaker 1 (44:56):
But then you're looking for an insecure, maybe
even crazy girl no, I think thatit's human nature to want
something that's valued andsomething that other people want
that's coming from a place,security from what I think,
because it's like if it shouldbe what you value, what you see

(45:17):
as value, not what other peoplesee as value, I mean you should
that.
I mean, yeah, that might be gutinstinct, but I think a smarter
person will be able torecognize that and still choose
what they, what they would thinkI don't know so.

Speaker 2 (45:31):
So I worked at nightlife for like five months.
I was like kind of like apromoter.
I hated it, um, and there'd beso many times where we'd go out.
One of the girls who came I'llbe talking to her literally just
to try to like become friendswith her so she would come out
to the club, you know, the nextnight.
That was kind of my job so Ihad to like retain girls right,
and a lot of times it would be agirl and she's like very much

(45:53):
blowing me off.
I'm like, okay, fair game, I'lljust like entertain everybody
else and then 30 minutes latersome other girl would be like
throwing herself at me and then,all of a sudden, the first girl
would start talking to meinteresting and I'm like 30
minutes ago, you wanted nothingto do with me and now all of a
sudden, magically, you're inlove with me, and I just saw it

(46:13):
happen so many times but is thiswhen you're looking for, like a
hookup or like a date, likelike someone to date?
I mean, I'm always looking fora true love, and that is all I
don't know if that's the bestway to meet your true love.

Speaker 1 (46:24):
Maybe it makes sense if you're just trying to hook up
, but where do you think Ishould meet my true love?
Where?
Uh, probably in the field thatyou love doing the most the
music, I believe yeah, musiciansare toxic, it's true.

Speaker 2 (46:40):
It's true, musicians are a little out there maybe
musician plus it's gonna betough for a shy romantic boy
like me to find a shy romanticboy.

Speaker 1 (46:50):
you mean the fuck?

Speaker 2 (46:51):
That was back in my old days.

Speaker 1 (46:54):
The remodeled fuck boy.

Speaker 2 (46:57):
Also, I would say I was more of a fuck man than a
fuck boy.
You know there's a difference.

Speaker 1 (47:01):
Is there?
What is the difference?

Speaker 2 (47:05):
Fuck boys are like guys who like take shirtless
selfies at like LA Fitness.
They post on Hinge.
They become a fuck man.
Go to equinox like a real fuckman and then post them on raya
so just one with a little bitmore money, yeah no, but it's
not, but it's attitude.

(47:26):
It's like the attitude also.
It's like the attitude also butyes, the money helps.
It's like the cross between fuckboy and sugar daddy like well,
it's more so like do you want aguy where, like his car, doors
open sideways like a peasant?
You know, like a civilian car,not up like a fucking spaceship?

(47:50):
Don't you want spaceship doorson your car?

Speaker 1 (47:53):
These are very weird things to me.

Speaker 2 (47:56):
Even part of this like consideration, you know
you'll say that, but I promiseyou, once I got money, girls
just magically have more of aconnection with me.
It's just the truth.

Speaker 1 (48:10):
When I was the nice poor boy Wasn't the confidence,
because I feel like money canmake people confident.

Speaker 2 (48:16):
you know it changes you yeah, confidence was part of
it, and just like even morethan confidence, it was just
like social intelligence.
Yeah, it was ability to reallylike read people and know what
they're thinking, and that kindof thing like the, the intuition
, I think, but also money.

(48:36):
I will say, though, there'sonly one thing that beats money
status girls clout and statusbeats everything yeah like you
could be ugly short.
You could be broke also status,but if you have, clout girls.
Just don't care, I don't knowwhat it is.

Speaker 1 (48:56):
I don't know what it is either, because out of all
these things, I would probablybe most victim to that.

Speaker 2 (49:02):
To the clout one.

Speaker 1 (49:04):
I don't know if I'd act on it, but I would
definitely feel more inclinedtowards it.
You know what I mean.
Yeah, I will admit that.

Speaker 2 (49:13):
I mean, yeah, I will admit that.
And what is the reason do youthink?
Do you think it's justbiological impulse that we just
have as human beings?
You want the leader.

Speaker 1 (49:17):
I feel like, okay, so if someone has clout, they're
emulating what I would want formyself, which is like a sense of
establishment you know, a senseof self, a strong sense of self
, you know, and that isattractive and like when someone
has clout.
That's kind of what I wouldwant for myself.

Speaker 2 (49:36):
You know, people want in others what they want in
themselves a lot of the timeinteresting it is interesting
because, even with like clout,right like, I understand why
guys want clout because, likeyou're a guy, you're lonely,
you're jerking off in your mom'sbasement and you get clout and
girls like you and then you getto have sex with real girls,

(49:58):
right.

Speaker 1 (49:59):
So I'm like you're talking about the fake clout yes
, yes, yes fake clout.
I feel like I could see I wouldbe able to see through it
probably so it's like itwouldn't be attractive.
I would probably be interestedand then find out it's fake and
then be like nah.

Speaker 2 (50:14):
But it's crazy because a lot of girls will find
out it's fake and they don'tcare.
They don't care.

Speaker 1 (50:18):
I know, I know girls like that and I'm like what are
you doing to yourself?

Speaker 2 (50:24):
It's so bizarre to me .

Speaker 1 (50:25):
I feel like they don't want to admit it, but they
just it's like a game.
Life is a game, it's all a joke, it's just fun, you know, it's
like the.

Speaker 2 (50:31):
Matrix.
They're just like yeah, I'mjust going to take the blue pill
.

Speaker 1 (50:33):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (50:34):
Like I don't want to go find out.
There's like machines out therethat control my life.
My life is good, whatever, whocares?
You know?
Yeah, but I also don'tunderstand you like get clout
because like you're at Drake'sparty or like, oh look, I got

(50:54):
flown out to Tulum for this coolthing.

Speaker 1 (50:56):
Probably just feels good.

Speaker 2 (50:58):
I know, but it doesn't do anything, it just.

Speaker 1 (51:00):
It feels good.

Speaker 2 (51:01):
Just clout for the sake of clout, like flexing on
people.

Speaker 1 (51:04):
Probably just feels good, yeah, interesting.
Yeah, I don't feel like I dothat.
I feel like I have had astruggle with posting on social
media, like when I travel andstuff.
I'm like I don't feel like Ineed to rub this in people's
faces.
And then people are like butyou do so many cool things, you
should post pictures, you shouldpost videos, you should tell
people about it more.
And I'm like okay, I'll do it.

(51:25):
Like it feels wrong sometimes.

Speaker 2 (51:30):
So I'm from Wisconsin right, wrong sometimes.
So I'm from wisconsin right,wisconsin, like the most humble
state.
It's very much like my dadworked at the factory.
I'm gonna go work at thefactory like my dad.
It's like very much like thatculture.
And so, coming here at firstlike I was the same way I didn't
post on instagram, I didn'tlike buy like a cool car and
like a rolex, all this bullshit.

(51:50):
And then I realized I was justputting myself at such a
disadvantage because I would seeguys do that and I would see
them get more opportunitiesNetworking wise.
I would see girls who, whowould there's?
There's a guy I know who, likeevery time he talks to girls
it's like the most cringe shitto me.

(52:11):
Like it's like every,everything is a name drop,
everything is.
I'm working on this big project.
We're getting investors.
Every single thing, everythingand I've even heard girls say to
me like, oh yeah, that guy'scringe.
And then a week later they'rehanging out with that guy and
it's just so crazy to me thatI'm like, well, you don't think
it's that cringe?

Speaker 1 (52:30):
they probably don't know what they want.
The girls?
This is what I think it is.

Speaker 2 (52:35):
Okay, I think that clout, status, money, all these
things right is the equivalentof like a girl being super hot.
So if like a girl's super hot,she could be a complete bitch.
She could have a worsepersonality.
There will be a line of guyslining up to date her just
because she's hot, and I thinkstatus is the same way.
If your guy was status, oh youcan get away with more yeah,

(52:58):
like girls might be like yeah,he's an asshole, yeah, he's all
these things, but like he hasstatus, so I'm still attracted
to that status it's his prettycard yeah, it's the equivalent.
It's kind of the equivalent forguys I could see that.
I could totally see that it'sit's bad I mean I, I used to
take, because I was very jadedwhen I first moved here yeah and

(53:20):
then I kind of took the mindsetit is what.
It is okay, let me just win atthis game let me just get rich,
get live in a mansion, buy afucking sports car and then I'll
fucking win this game.
And then everybody can be madat me, but it is what I don't
make the rules I just play.

Speaker 1 (53:37):
I play the game, I don't make the rules just the
way the world works and you'rejust going along with it.

Speaker 2 (53:41):
Finally, I wish I could just be a good little simp
and just fucking ride my birthscrews with my simp friends and
like do simp activities, peesitting down and shit you know.
So don't fuck up my toilet.
But like no, like I gotta standup when I pee and I gotta
fucking buy shit and like getclouded is what it is, I don't
know, my god um, I don't evenknow, because it's true.

Speaker 1 (54:07):
It's true, like in la , that la culture is so
different from anywhere else inthe world.

Speaker 2 (54:12):
LA, Miami, New York kind of, but yeah, like the big
cities, I think it's like this.

Speaker 1 (54:18):
Like I'm from the Bay and it's drastically different.
Everything's flashy here.
Everything is about status.

Speaker 2 (54:25):
But there's like no hot girls in the Bay.
It's like so rare.
And then when there is, haveyou heard the thing?
They call them San Franciscodimes?
No, it's like so rare.

Speaker 1 (54:34):
and then when there?

Speaker 2 (54:34):
is have you heard the thing?
It's.
They call them san franciscodimes no, so you know, dime is
like a 10 out of 10, like oh,she's a dime, so it's like a
girl who's like a seven, but shelives in san francisco so she
thinks she's a 10.
No, no because it's likethere's no, like that's, that's
not.

Speaker 3 (54:44):
Obviously you're a 10 like in real life, but like for
all the other girls, yeah inreal life hey, you actually
weren't a big catfish.

Speaker 2 (54:52):
The catfishing has been an issue a little bit on
here.
I mean not so much on here,because even if the girl is not
like cute, like, we go for cutegirls because they get a lot
more views.
That's just the truth.

Speaker 1 (55:03):
Like people just stop to scroll.
I get it.

Speaker 2 (55:05):
But you can still have good conversations with
like ugly people too, you know,and, by the way, I'm not saying
I'm like a 10 out of 10.
I with like ugly people too,you know and, by the way, I'm
not saying I'm like a 10 out of10.
I wish I was 6'5 and goodlooking.
I can just get one tattoo andgirls want to fuck me for no
reason.
But instead I got to memorizeall the characteristics of the
star signs be charismatic,fucking.
Be confident, do all this shit,you know do the extra 10 miles.

(55:26):
Yeah, it's like I had to figureout my path, you know you had to
work extra hard for each inch.

Speaker 1 (55:31):
You weren't, I did?

Speaker 2 (55:32):
I did and that's why I fucking.
But but here's the thing.

Speaker 1 (55:35):
I would rather be like this, like have you heard
the theory, if you're born rich,it's not fun, but if you grew
up poor and then you get rich,then like that's the best life
you can live I've heard so manythings about like born into it
or not, or worked into it, like,yeah, it makes sense.
Uh, it sets up your life sodifferently, your expectations

(55:56):
and like what you get, yourstandards and everything like.
I don't know, I guess, ifyou're working for what you want
in the bigger picture.
Are your standards higher orlower?
Right?
That's a trick question.
Because in what regard?
Because someone who has it all.
It's like they're alreadystarting at the top.

(56:18):
So is there a higher or isthere, like I don't know,
there's no higher after acertain point, right?

Speaker 2 (56:24):
Yeah, I think that's why a lot of celebrities end up
with like drug shit.

Speaker 1 (56:29):
They're like what else is there to the life?

Speaker 2 (56:31):
It's literally like they can't get any higher, like
so then the only way to gethigher is drugs, because drugs
you can.
Just it's literally a chemicalthat just pushes you higher as
opposed to like an experience,and then eventually you get to
the point where you're just likemaxed out on that.
Then it's like okay, what isthere now?
Yeah, no, it makes sense, yeahbut money can buy a jet ski.

(56:53):
I've never seen a sad person ona jet ski, so like that logic's
out.
Oh, Money's.

Speaker 1 (57:06):
Yeah, I don't know, Money's always like its own
topic, Mm-hmm money's alwayslike its own topic.

Speaker 2 (57:12):
Did you ever feel the pull to cause cause, acting
comedy these are all things thatit's notoriously difficult to
make money in.

Speaker 1 (57:21):
Right.

Speaker 2 (57:21):
Music Right.
Did you ever feel the pull tolike ah, maybe I should just
keep these as hobbies and justgo the corporate route or
something.

Speaker 1 (57:29):
I don't think I could survive a corporate route.
I really don't.
I think I would lose my mind.
I don't think I could survive acorporate route.
I really don't.
I think I would lose my mind.
I think I would be notfunctional.
Honestly, I think I'd last acouple months and then I'd just
get fired.
I would not be able to hang.
I do not have the skills.
I do not have the patience.

Speaker 2 (57:50):
Just not for you.

Speaker 1 (57:51):
I can't.
I feel like I sound like aspoiled princess saying that you
know, because it's like, well,that's what everyone has to do
to survive in the bay, but likeI can't but it also seems like
you work very hard in yourcreative I do yeah there's a lot
of people who just like sitthere and manifest and watch
netflix and you know, don't doshit I know you seem like you're

(58:12):
really out there hustling,networking.
I love what I do, I lovefiguring out how to do things, I
love meeting people.
I feel like I'm working towardsbig things and to give to
myself, but also, once I haveenough for myself, I want to

(58:32):
give to the world.
You know, in a lot of ways, andI feel like if I'm working for
a corporate, it's going to behard to find a corporation that
I believe in that much you knowmore than I believe in myself to
drive me like that.
Yeah.
And it's hard.
It's so scary to rely on otherpeople and like corporates are
big on that.
It's so scary to rely on otherpeople and like corporate's big

(58:54):
on that and like, yeah, inacting and stuff there's a
little bit of that, but it'sjust not the same, I agree.

Speaker 2 (58:59):
I agree, interesting.
We're about out of time.
I got some rapid fire questionsfor you.

Speaker 1 (59:07):
Favorite food?
I don't know.
Pasta, sushi, I don't know.
Yeah, I'm plant-based now.
So, oh, vegan, vegetarian,vegan.
I cook vegan and then when I'mout, vegetarian's good enough.

Speaker 2 (59:21):
I cannot.
I did vegan for like two weeksto try it out.
You know some people say, oh,like mental clarity and all this
stuff.
I was just hungry all the time.

Speaker 1 (59:30):
Apparently, it depends on your blood type if
it's for you or not.

Speaker 2 (59:34):
I don't know, yeah, I think mine is XY.

Speaker 1 (59:39):
I don't know if vegan is going to work.
That's not how that works.

Speaker 2 (59:43):
That's for me Favorite candy.

Speaker 1 (59:46):
Candy.
Reese's Cups?
I don't know, reese's are solid.

Speaker 2 (59:53):
I hate when people like the fruit candies.

Speaker 1 (59:54):
I'm like the fruit candies.
I can't eat the.

Speaker 2 (59:57):
You mean like the gummies anything sour patch,
kids Skittles oh oh, it's likeokay, fruit flavored stuff, yeah
yeah, yeah, um favorite firstdate spot or activity oh um, I
went go-kart racing on my firstdate, that's the partner I'm
with it was solid so much funinteresting, and then you can

(01:00:20):
kind of get competitive, youknow oh, I laughed.

Speaker 1 (01:00:22):
I laughed him twice you lapped him.

Speaker 2 (01:00:26):
I'm surprised you didn't instantly lose all
attraction.
Why?
Because you just like, oh, youemasculated him on the first
date I don't believe in that Iknow, we were playing.

Speaker 1 (01:00:37):
Yeah, yeah, can't go wrong with that um.

Speaker 2 (01:00:41):
Next uh uh travel destination.
You want to go to that.

Speaker 1 (01:00:44):
You haven't been so far I want to go to um.
There's ah, what's that?
Bali, bali.
I want to go to bali bali isnice.

Speaker 2 (01:00:54):
It's super cheap too.
It's just like the plane ticket, find a date that it's good and
then, like, once you get there,you get like a villa for like a
hundred dollars a night withlike pool and like maids and
like they cook cookie breakfastand everything that's so cool,
yeah all right.
Well, this has been fun.
Where can people find youinstagram, t, tiktok, anything
like that?

Speaker 1 (01:01:14):
Yeah, I'm on Instagram Vicky Beretta
V-I-K-K-I-B-E-R-E-T-T-A.
I had to learn how to spellthat last name too.
That's my stage name and that'sthat's me on everything.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:01:29):
Awesome, awesome.
Well, this has been fun.
We'll have to do a round twosometime.

Speaker 1 (01:01:32):
Yeah, I'd love to All .