August 29, 2024 • 22 mins
Are you ready to take control of your life and create the future you've always dreamed of? In this inspiring episode, Kevin and Bekah Tinter explore the powerful concept of lifestyle design and how it applies to entrepreneurs and employees alike.
Drawing from their personal experiences and insights, they discuss:
Why lifestyle design is a continuous practice, not a one-time plan
The importance of making intentional daily decisions
How to create systems that support your long-term goals
Balancing faith and action in your lifestyle design
Developing an "extreme ownership" mindset for success
Kevin and Bekah offer practical advice on aligning your daily choices with your values and goals. They share personal anecdotes about their own journey in lifestyle design, including how they've navigated challenges and made intentional decisions in their family life and business.
Whether you're just starting to think about designing your ideal life or looking to refine your current approach, this episode provides actionable steps to help you create a life of purpose, freedom, and fulfillment. Join us for a conversation that will inspire you to take charge of your future and live life on your own terms.
Don't forget to like, subscribe, and share this video with someone who could benefit from designing their dream life!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
Hey friends, welcome to the Uncommon Freedom podcast,
where we explore theintersection of entrepreneurship
and intentional living.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Today's episode focuses on lifestyle design and
how it applies to your dailyroutines and decisions as an
entrepreneur.
Speaker 1 (00:21):
We'll discuss why lifestyle design isn't a
one-time project but acontinuous practice that shapes
your success and fulfillment,and real quick.
I think it's important to pointout that when we talk about
entrepreneur, it's really moreof a lifestyle.
It doesn't necessarily meanthat you own a business.
We know that probably the vastmajority of Americans are going
(00:43):
to be employees, but you haveemployees with an employee
mindset and you have employeeswith an entrepreneur mindset.
I know we have severalemployees and we don't want
people who just show up just toearn a paycheck.
We want them and we're actuallyblessed.
We have some employees thatactually really care and they're
as vested in their job as weare our business, and so that's
(01:04):
the mindset we really want toencourage all of you.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
That extreme ownership mindset is really what
we're talking about today, andI think it's a big deal, for
maybe you are someone with aJ-O-B but you have some other,
bigger dreams and your J-O-B mayor may not support that, so you
might also be looking forsomething else to add to your
life or replace that with downthe road, and so we want to talk
(01:28):
about what it means to reallydesign our life versus just
accepting the life that we weregiven.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
That's great.
So first thing we're going totalk about is lifestyle design
as an ongoing process.
Lifestyle design is reallychoosing to create the life you
want instead of accepting thelife you were given.
We really want to encourage youto understand that it's not
just a one-time effort where youplan everything out and then
everything just falls into place.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
If you've been around , that would be really nice.
It would be awesome.
Speaker 1 (01:52):
But if you've been around a while, you realize that
things happen right.
Projects take longer thanthey're supposed to.
So kind of the phrase we wantyou to keep in mind is aim, fire
and adjust.
So, having been in the MarineCorps, we'd go to the rifle
range to sight in our M16s andyou know there was kind of a
standard setting for the sightsand you would sight it in at 200
(02:14):
, 300, 500.
And then you kind of get anidea of okay, if I'm at 200,
this is where my sights go, 300,this is where my sights go, and
500.
And so you could understandthat.
But then there's alwaysadditional factors.
You know a bullet travelsdifferent, whether it's hot or
cold, whether there's a lot ofwind and which direction the
wind is coming from.
And so the reality is the windsof life will hit you, and it's
(02:37):
important for you to understandthat.
What we want to do is help youcreate a plan, but also not
freak out when it doesn't go asexactly as planned.
We've done construction projects.
Just about everyone probablyhas done a construction project,
and I don't know that I've evermet anyone who's had a
construction project end quickerthan expected.
They typically take longer andcost more, and so that is the
(02:59):
winds of life that we're talkingabout.
So without the plan, you know,there's also a saying that says
you know, no battle plansurvives makes it past first
contact.
So the idea is you create theperfect plan, but you know the
enemy is out there.
They're going to do thingsdifferent than maybe what you
expected them to do and it'sgoing to cause your plan to go
to poop.
But we're going to adjust fromthere.
(03:21):
But you're better off having aplan.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
Well said.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
All right.
So the next thing is we want totalk about uncommon freedom,
and just to help you understandwhat uncommon freedom is, we
want you to imagine being ableto do what you want when you
want, with whom you want.
But we're not just talkingabout a hedonistic lifestyle
here where you're a richbillionaire living on a yacht
with dozens of supermodels onyour yacht with you, while your
(03:46):
wife and kids are back in theStates no idea what's going on.
That's not what we're talkingabout.
We're talking about reallybeing able to enjoy your life
with your family, which is agood thing I think God wants us
to do that but also being ableto live out the kingdom of God
here on earth, but still havechoices and freedom.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Exactly, exactly so being able to choose More
proactive than reactive.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Instead of just only being able to go on missions
trips that maybe your churchdoes once a year.
If there's really a passionproject that you have, can you
seek out a ministry and go withthem.
Can you bring your family withyou?
Can you bring extended familywith you?
Can you bring employees withthem?
Can you bring your family withyou?
Can you bring extended familywith you?
Can you bring employees withyou?
Things like that, which we'veactually been able to do on
multiple occasions, if you getan invitation to do something,
(04:32):
you know like.
We got back in December, ourfriend Will was doing some
ministry in Mexico and I wasable to go with two of the boys.
You know that was lifestyledesign.
It was.
You know it was.
The design was actually havingthe time freedom to be able to
make spur of the momentdecisions, cause it was kind of
like found out on Sunday and Ithink we left on Wednesday,
something like that.
But that's what we're talkingabout being able to do what you
(04:55):
want when you want, with whomyou want.
And there's also some amazing,you know, recreational ways to
do that.
We've been able to take someamazing trips with friends that
we could not take prior tohaving our own business and
really prior to starting toexperience lifestyle design in
our life.
You know, last four years, justwith the pandemic is just
(05:17):
realizing I mean it just becameabundantly apparent, especially
to us super grateful that we hadput in the work to really
design our life and to havefreedom during the pandemic.
Because there were so manypeople who they were stuck, you
know, their kids couldn't attendschool.
We were able to invest in whatwe had already had our kids in
(05:38):
private education but so manypeople were grateful that they
had their kids in privateeducation or they had the option
to homeschool.
Once they saw really just someof the crazy agendas being
pushed in public schools andjust the fact that they weren't
taking kids back at school.
Our kids played sports.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
Went to birthday parties like regular kids and
guess what?
Speaker 1 (05:57):
No outbreaks.
Our kids were healthy.
Speaker 2 (05:58):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
And so just the pandemic really drove home the
point that even if you think youhave a secure job, a government
job, I mean, there was peoplein the government sector losing
their jobs during the pandemic.
And you know, security is whatwe call the S word and we've
seen a lot of people with thosetypes of jobs get laid off and
(06:21):
it can be very disappointingbecause they don't have a backup
plan.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Well said.
The next thing we want to talkabout is that lifestyle design
still requires kind of themoment to moment decision.
So what we mean is we talkedabout the fact you don't just
create the plan and then executethe plan for the rest of your
life and everything goes amazing.
That would be wonderful, butthat's not how life works, of
course.
And so lifestyle design meanshaving a clear vision of what
(06:46):
your values are and we're goingto talk about that more in the
next podcast that we do buthaving a good vision of your
values, where you want to go,what kind of life you want to
create and what you want to beknown for.
I mean, we made some of thosedecisions, probably
unconsciously, early in ourmarriage.
We wanted to be known for likea bulletproof marriage.
We couldn't define it back then, but you know, divorce wasn't
an option.
We were committed to each other.
(07:07):
We were going to do what ittook.
Um, we wanted to parentintentionally.
So not just, you know, let ourkids kind of flow through life,
but like be very directed in howwe were guiding and directing
them.
And we had intentions.
We have intentions for howthey're going to enter the world
as young adults which we can'tcontrol every part of, but we
are certainly influencing it.
(07:27):
And, like anything in life, youcan have a great plan but, as
you mentioned, it takes regularand consistent pivots and
adjustments.
So you have to have someoverarching vision initially,
but then you also need to makethose decisions in the moments
that move you towards or closerto the outcome that you want.
And I think having that reallyclear vision and also sharing it
with each other like if you hada lifestyle design and I had a
(07:48):
lifestyle design that were notaligned it would be very
difficult for us to make ourdecisions from day to day.
But because we're mostly rowingthe same direction and have the
same shared dreams and visions,it's a lot easier for us.
Even when we're maybe out ofalignment in small ways, our big
vision is in alignment.
When you think about some ofthose everyday decisions, I want
(08:08):
you to think about things thatyou do that might seem very
small, but that they have asignificant outcome.
Right, I think about you, know,as the person who does most of
the grocery shopping, and Idon't actually physically go
into the store very often, Iactually delegate that task to
other people, but I order onlinegroceries and I make the
decisions about what comes intoour pantry, what comes into our
refrigerator, and because Ichoose to keep things really
(08:30):
healthy, it makes it so mucheasier for all of us to eat well
, I choose not to bring thingsin that are, you know, big
temptations or we don't havethem in large quantities.
The same thing with you knoweating decisions.
Are you eating out all the timeor do you make a decision you're
going to?
You know cook at home, even ifit's a little bit less
convenient, because you havegoals of consuming high quality
food and also family timesitting down for dinners and
(08:53):
meals, which we know influencehow kids are raised.
And then the third thing is, ofcourse it can.
It contributes to your budget.
Generally speaking, it'scheaper to eat at home.
Maybe things like impulsepurchases or watching TV,
anything you want to add to thatone.
And then next is to reallyencourage all of us to be
(09:13):
mindful about our daily choicesand how they contribute to that
larger daily life.
I think you know so oftenbecause we can live in just
what's in front of us.
At times we say to ourselveswell, I ate a salad today, so
I'm a healthy person.
Or you know, if I eat ahamburger today, it makes me an
unhealthy person.
But the truth is, thosedecisions are just votes for the
type of people that we'rebecoming.
And so if you want a little bitmore resources on what I just
shared right there, go to AtomicHabits, james Clear great book.
(09:36):
But he says you can't just havegoals, you have to have systems
that support your goals, andthat's what we're talking about
in our decision making.
And then, of course, uncommonfreedom.
It stresses the importance ofmaking intentional decisions
that align with those valuesvalues and goals.
And so we want you to thinkthrough things versus just going
along with the crowd, and Iknow that one way that we
consider that is we look at theinfluences that are on our lives
(09:58):
and we think about whetherthose are the type of people we
want to trade lives with or movetowards, or whether that's a
life that we.
It just is not appealing to usand that sort of helps us make
those decisions with societalpressures.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
All right.
The next thing we want to talkabout, friends, is the quality
of your decisions.
So those who achieve the mostdefinitely make the highest
quality decisions consistently.
Let's talk about athletes.
Right, we have one athlete inour house right now that is
getting up 5 o'clock in themorning.
No, he's getting up about 5.30in the morning to work out at 6
(10:31):
o'clock.
He rolls out of bed pretty fast.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
Yeah, he's getting about 5.30 in the morning to
work out.
At six o'clock.
He rolls out of bed pretty fast.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Yeah, he does, but he's out but still, he's getting
to the gym with you three daysa week Before school, before
school, and he's a high schooler.
And we have other kids that arechoosing not to do that Correct
, and then we have others thatare choosing to work out with me
.
The bottom line is qualitydecisions like that will pay off
.
And do they pay off right away?
No, but do they pay off overtime?
Speaker 2 (10:56):
Absolutely, and he's actually seen the muscle mass
growth the body fat reduction.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
Not that he wasn't healthy when he started, but
he's seeing the results and it'sgoing to be pretty awesome for
him.
But even better than that and wekeep talking about James Clear,
but even more important thanthe decisions is having the
system that doesn't require asmany decisions, because what we
know is that decisions requireenergy yes, and when we have to
(11:26):
make every single food choicelike, it's a lot easier to
create some kind of go-to mealoptions even if it's for your
family for dinner, instead ofhaving to decide every day
what's for dinner.
Have some go-to healthy optionsthat are that either you plan
out your menu ahead of time orjust that you have a list or
(11:47):
cookbook handy so that when youcome home, it's time for eating,
it's time for dinner.
You can, you just have thislist and you go to it, instead
of having to decide oh, you knowwhat we'll just do take out for
you know some type of unhealthyfood.
Um, you know, if your goal is,as an individual, to get healthy
really kind of figuring outwhat are.
Um.
You know if, especially ifyou're not trying to lose weight
and following a specific plan,um, you know what are the macros
(12:10):
you're shooting for and how,how does that break down into
breakfast, lunch and dinner andthose healthy snacks you're
going to have in between?
And then figure out, like, whatare the meals that are going to
do that?
Because if you have tocalculate everything every
single time, you might sustainthat for a week or two, but
having to do that over and, overand over is going to get
difficult.
So just having a better systemso that you don't have to make
(12:33):
as many decisions is reallyimportant.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
And James Clear talks about.
You know, when you're trying toimplement a good habit that you
want to have, it's make itobvious and make it easy.
I think were the two things.
There's a couple ways that hetalks about it and it's really
brilliant.
It's just like when you'retrying to get rid of a habit,
you want to make it less obvious, you want to, you know, put it
in a less obvious place, youwant to make it harder to make
that decision, and the oppositeis true when you're trying to
build a good habit.
So so often you know, we saythat we want, we have uphill
(12:57):
dreams and we have downhillhabits and it's because we
haven't set up a system forourselves to succeed.
You know, we have some peoplein our family who are, who need
and want and desire to be ontime, but they have not set up a
system for themselves yet tobecome a person who shows up on
time for things.
So we're hoping that thatbecomes a habit at some point in
the near future.
Speaker 1 (13:17):
The important thing is to make your decisions on the
front end when you're settingup your systems.
You know because, like JamesClear, we're talking about him a
lot today but your systems areperfectly designed to give you
the life that you currently have, and so, if you're overweight,
your systems are set up to giveyou for you to be overweight.
If you're wealthy, you've gotsystems that are set up to help
(13:41):
you become wealthy and likely.
It's not winning the lottery.
If you're in debt, your systemsare set up for you to be in
debt.
The bottom line is we are aproduct of our system, so the
key is to make our decisions onthe front end, implement systems
that support our long-term goal, and then we have to make fewer
daily decisions.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
All right.
Lastly, we want to talk abouttrusting in God's design, and
this is important as Christians,because we believe that God has
a very clear vision for ourlives.
Now.
He gives us a ton ofdecision-making ability within
that.
We read a really good book Ithink it was by James Orberg
years ago, and it wasinteresting.
It's like does God care who wechoose to marry?
(14:25):
Well, he cares about, probably,the quality of the person or
what job we get.
Does he care about that?
No, he probably cares that wereflect Jesus in the job that we
do.
So there are things that Godgives us a lot of freedom in,
and I know, when it comes tolifestyle design, I think that,
again, god gives us a lot offreedom, but if we design a life
that's purely selfish or isoutside of his will, then
(14:46):
there's going to be dissonanceand it's not going to be a life
that's going to be worth livingor a life that's going to be
rewarding.
And so what we look for is howcan we make an impact on people,
how can we steward therelationships that we've been
given within our own family aswell as in our community?
How can we steward our financesand things?
And we know that if we're doingthose types of behaviors, our
(15:06):
life is something that webelieve would be honoring to God
.
Speaker 1 (15:10):
And actually along those lines, when you think
about the parable of the threeservants, the truth is, god
isn't okay with us not beingintentional, not okay with us
not stewarding and multiplying.
Right, you know what the mastersays about the servant who got
one and did nothing with it.
Only you know, finished withone is, like you, wicked servant
(15:33):
.
So the point is, we aresupposed to design, we're
supposed to be intentional,we're supposed to multiply.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
Correct.
And I do think if we view ourlife as a precious gift from God
, knowing that he died for usand we have one life to live,
just one, then it's also aboutwhat kind of impact can we make?
We don't want to just slideinto heaven someday and say like
well, we survived.
No, we want to thrive and makeas big of an impact as we can,
and we also know that we, thethings that we're doing now, the
(16:04):
decisions we're making.
I'm trying to reflect on thismore and more.
We're very young I feel veryyoung, but I'm reminded, thank
you.
I'm reminded that the thingsthat we're doing now, we are
intentionally parenting thesekids that are going to, you know
, become adults and lead theirown lives and I will never meet,
likely, my great grandchildrenor my great-great-grandchildren.
So, a hundred years from now,if God hasn't come back, there
will be, you know, our offspringwill be on this earth and the
(16:28):
way that they behave and act,I'm hoping, is going to still be
honoring God because of thefruit of our labor, because of
the prayers that we've laid,because of the characteristics
we've built in, and thatsomewhere along the way they're
going to know that they hadpraying grandparents and that
they had faithful grandparentsand they had responsible
grandparents, and so those arethe types of things that we're
(16:49):
leading our family with now inhopes that it makes a long-term,
lasting impact.
So we would encourage you, seekGod's guidance in your daily
decisions and your lifestyledesign.
Don't just do it on your own.
Everything needs to run throughthe filter of like God.
Is this for me, if it is open,the doors that no man can shut,
and if it's not for me, closethe doors that no man can open,
(17:11):
and just be clear about thosekinds of things as well as
seeking godly wisdom.
We've done that a ton throughour own parents, through friends
and counseling Just when we'reup against decisions we don't
know how to handle, and that'sbeen really powerful.
And then, when it comes touncommon freedom, as far as
making sure that we don't letoutside forces control our life,
and really trusting God's plan,a big part is spending time in
(17:34):
prayer, both individually, as acop and as a couple, as well as
getting that good counsel andchoosing to run with lions.
You know, if we can, if we putourselves around donkeys, uh,
we're not going to be making alot of lion type decisions.
Speaker 1 (17:47):
Well there's.
There's that really cool storyabout the bald eagle egg that
rolls out of the nest all theway down the hill into a chicken
farm and the eagle ends uphatching the chickens take care
of the eagle, and the eagle endsup growing up with a bunch of
chickens and acts like chickens.
And then one day it sees eaglesand realizes wait a minute,
(18:11):
those birds up in the air, they,they look like me.
Why am I not flying?
And the reason is you're notflying because you're hanging
around with chickens and it's sojust it's a great little
illustration of you know you cantake.
We all have greatness within us.
We all have that you know.
You know there's like we wantto soar with eagles, but a lot
(18:32):
of times our environment youknow who we're spending time
with.
You know we're hanging aroundin the chicken coop and so we're
behaving like chickens and soit's just a great reminder that
it's difficult to steward whatyou have when you're hanging
around with in the chicken coop.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
And God does expect us to have extreme ownership for
the things that we have controlover, and so I think it's even
Christ-like to say I can'talways control what happens to
me, but I can control how Irespond to it and is life
happening to me or for me?
Those are some common sayingsbut truly they do help.
You have that ownership mindsetand when you're designing a life
(19:07):
that you can be proud of, youcan be excited about, you can
navigate even the really hardthings.
It's trusting that there is agood father that loves us
unconditionally and even whenthings in this world go poorly
which they absolutely will,because we live in a fallen
world that he's still on thethrone, that he still has the
outcome in the end and that heloves us so deeply that he'll
walk us through anything.
(19:28):
That's difficult, and I cantell you just in the last you
know, six months of navigatingsome difficult parenting stuff,
I have felt God in those momentsin such a different and
profound way, and it's evenallowed us to make some of those
decisions that were reallyuncomfortable for me personally,
because we knew what we weredesigning and we knew we could
(19:48):
trust God, and between those twothings we were able to walk
some things out that were I meanhonestly, I hope we never have
to do it again.
It didn't kill us, didn't ruinus, but it was very painful in
the moment and, because of God'sfaithfulness and our commitment
, we navigated those, I wouldsay, as best as we could.
Speaker 1 (20:07):
All right, friends.
That wraps up today's episode,but we definitely want you to
tune in next week when wecontinue the second part of this
discussion.
We're going to talk about corevalues and intentional living.
We're going to talk aboutmanaging your time and energy,
which is really important, andwe're also going to talk about
embracing abundance somethingthat we had a radical shift in
(20:27):
about 13 years ago.
So please subscribe to ourpodcast for more insights on
blending entrepreneurship andthat entrepreneurial mindset
with intentional living.
Follow us on social media fordaily tips and inspiration.
You can find us on Instagramand Facebook and.
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(20:48):
please.
And if you're going to leave areview, please make sure it's a
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Otherwise, just don't wasteyour time and don't do that to
us.
Okay, Like Dave Ramsey says, ifyou don't have anything nice to
say, don't say anything at all.
So if we're not for you, we getit.
Go find something else.
But we really do appreciate you, those of you who are finding
(21:09):
value.
We appreciate you supporting us.
We appreciate you sharing andreviewing this podcast.
It really helps other peoplefind us and this way, fellow
entrepreneurs who are passionateabout designing a life can find
something else that will helpthem.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
So thank you for tuning in, and we're going to
leave you with this saying weall experience pain.
It's either the pain ofdiscipline or the pain of regret
.
So the fruit of regret isbitter, but the fruit of
discipline is sweet.
Speaker 1 (21:35):
See you next time, friends.
Bye, all right, friends.
Please subscribe to the podcastfor more insights on blending
entrepreneurship and theentrepreneurial mindset with
intentional living.
You can follow us on socialmedia.
We are on Instagram, primarily,and Facebook, and you're going
(21:58):
to find daily tips andinspiration from us there.
You'll also find us on YouTubelots of shorts as well as our
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And then please, if you enjoythis podcast, please leave us a
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YouTube as well as whateverpodcast platform you're
listening to us on.
Hey friends, welcome to the Uncommon Freedom podcast,
where we explore theintersection of entrepreneurship
and intentional living.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Today's episode focuses on lifestyle design and
how it applies to your dailyroutines and decisions as an
entrepreneur.
Speaker 1 (00:21):
We'll discuss why lifestyle design isn't a
one-time project but acontinuous practice that shapes
your success and fulfillment,and real quick.
I think it's important to pointout that when we talk about
entrepreneur, it's really moreof a lifestyle.
It doesn't necessarily meanthat you own a business.
We know that probably the vastmajority of Americans are going
(00:43):
to be employees, but you haveemployees with an employee
mindset and you have employeeswith an entrepreneur mindset.
I know we have severalemployees and we don't want
people who just show up just toearn a paycheck.
We want them and we're actuallyblessed.
We have some employees thatactually really care and they're
as vested in their job as weare our business, and so that's
(01:04):
the mindset we really want toencourage all of you.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
That extreme ownership mindset is really what
we're talking about today, andI think it's a big deal, for
maybe you are someone with aJ-O-B but you have some other,
bigger dreams and your J-O-B mayor may not support that, so you
might also be looking forsomething else to add to your
life or replace that with downthe road, and so we want to talk
(01:28):
about what it means to reallydesign our life versus just
accepting the life that we weregiven.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
That's great.
So first thing we're going totalk about is lifestyle design
as an ongoing process.
Lifestyle design is reallychoosing to create the life you
want instead of accepting thelife you were given.
We really want to encourage youto understand that it's not
just a one-time effort where youplan everything out and then
everything just falls into place.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
If you've been around , that would be really nice.
It would be awesome.
Speaker 1 (01:52):
But if you've been around a while, you realize that
things happen right.
Projects take longer thanthey're supposed to.
So kind of the phrase we wantyou to keep in mind is aim, fire
and adjust.
So, having been in the MarineCorps, we'd go to the rifle
range to sight in our M16s andyou know there was kind of a
standard setting for the sightsand you would sight it in at 200
(02:14):
, 300, 500.
And then you kind of get anidea of okay, if I'm at 200,
this is where my sights go, 300,this is where my sights go, and
500.
And so you could understandthat.
But then there's alwaysadditional factors.
You know a bullet travelsdifferent, whether it's hot or
cold, whether there's a lot ofwind and which direction the
wind is coming from.
And so the reality is the windsof life will hit you, and it's
(02:37):
important for you to understandthat.
What we want to do is help youcreate a plan, but also not
freak out when it doesn't go asexactly as planned.
We've done construction projects.
Just about everyone probablyhas done a construction project,
and I don't know that I've evermet anyone who's had a
construction project end quickerthan expected.
They typically take longer andcost more, and so that is the
(02:59):
winds of life that we're talkingabout.
So without the plan, you know,there's also a saying that says
you know, no battle plansurvives makes it past first
contact.
So the idea is you create theperfect plan, but you know the
enemy is out there.
They're going to do thingsdifferent than maybe what you
expected them to do and it'sgoing to cause your plan to go
to poop.
But we're going to adjust fromthere.
(03:21):
But you're better off having aplan.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
Well said.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
All right.
So the next thing is we want totalk about uncommon freedom,
and just to help you understandwhat uncommon freedom is, we
want you to imagine being ableto do what you want when you
want, with whom you want.
But we're not just talkingabout a hedonistic lifestyle
here where you're a richbillionaire living on a yacht
with dozens of supermodels onyour yacht with you, while your
(03:46):
wife and kids are back in theStates no idea what's going on.
That's not what we're talkingabout.
We're talking about reallybeing able to enjoy your life
with your family, which is agood thing I think God wants us
to do that but also being ableto live out the kingdom of God
here on earth, but still havechoices and freedom.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Exactly, exactly so being able to choose More
proactive than reactive.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Instead of just only being able to go on missions
trips that maybe your churchdoes once a year.
If there's really a passionproject that you have, can you
seek out a ministry and go withthem.
Can you bring your family withyou?
Can you bring extended familywith you?
Can you bring employees withthem?
Can you bring your family withyou?
Can you bring extended familywith you?
Can you bring employees withyou?
Things like that, which we'veactually been able to do on
multiple occasions, if you getan invitation to do something,
(04:32):
you know like.
We got back in December, ourfriend Will was doing some
ministry in Mexico and I wasable to go with two of the boys.
You know that was lifestyledesign.
It was.
You know it was.
The design was actually havingthe time freedom to be able to
make spur of the momentdecisions, cause it was kind of
like found out on Sunday and Ithink we left on Wednesday,
something like that.
But that's what we're talkingabout being able to do what you
(04:55):
want when you want, with whomyou want.
And there's also some amazing,you know, recreational ways to
do that.
We've been able to take someamazing trips with friends that
we could not take prior tohaving our own business and
really prior to starting toexperience lifestyle design in
our life.
You know, last four years, justwith the pandemic is just
(05:17):
realizing I mean it just becameabundantly apparent, especially
to us super grateful that we hadput in the work to really
design our life and to havefreedom during the pandemic.
Because there were so manypeople who they were stuck, you
know, their kids couldn't attendschool.
We were able to invest in whatwe had already had our kids in
(05:38):
private education but so manypeople were grateful that they
had their kids in privateeducation or they had the option
to homeschool.
Once they saw really just someof the crazy agendas being
pushed in public schools andjust the fact that they weren't
taking kids back at school.
Our kids played sports.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
Went to birthday parties like regular kids and
guess what?
Speaker 1 (05:57):
No outbreaks.
Our kids were healthy.
Speaker 2 (05:58):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
And so just the pandemic really drove home the
point that even if you think youhave a secure job, a government
job, I mean, there was peoplein the government sector losing
their jobs during the pandemic.
And you know, security is whatwe call the S word and we've
seen a lot of people with thosetypes of jobs get laid off and
(06:21):
it can be very disappointingbecause they don't have a backup
plan.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Well said.
The next thing we want to talkabout is that lifestyle design
still requires kind of themoment to moment decision.
So what we mean is we talkedabout the fact you don't just
create the plan and then executethe plan for the rest of your
life and everything goes amazing.
That would be wonderful, butthat's not how life works, of
course.
And so lifestyle design meanshaving a clear vision of what
(06:46):
your values are and we're goingto talk about that more in the
next podcast that we do buthaving a good vision of your
values, where you want to go,what kind of life you want to
create and what you want to beknown for.
I mean, we made some of thosedecisions, probably
unconsciously, early in ourmarriage.
We wanted to be known for likea bulletproof marriage.
We couldn't define it back then, but you know, divorce wasn't
an option.
We were committed to each other.
(07:07):
We were going to do what ittook.
Um, we wanted to parentintentionally.
So not just, you know, let ourkids kind of flow through life,
but like be very directed in howwe were guiding and directing
them.
And we had intentions.
We have intentions for howthey're going to enter the world
as young adults which we can'tcontrol every part of, but we
are certainly influencing it.
(07:27):
And, like anything in life, youcan have a great plan but, as
you mentioned, it takes regularand consistent pivots and
adjustments.
So you have to have someoverarching vision initially,
but then you also need to makethose decisions in the moments
that move you towards or closerto the outcome that you want.
And I think having that reallyclear vision and also sharing it
with each other like if you hada lifestyle design and I had a
(07:48):
lifestyle design that were notaligned it would be very
difficult for us to make ourdecisions from day to day.
But because we're mostly rowingthe same direction and have the
same shared dreams and visions,it's a lot easier for us.
Even when we're maybe out ofalignment in small ways, our big
vision is in alignment.
When you think about some ofthose everyday decisions, I want
(08:08):
you to think about things thatyou do that might seem very
small, but that they have asignificant outcome.
Right, I think about you, know,as the person who does most of
the grocery shopping, and Idon't actually physically go
into the store very often, Iactually delegate that task to
other people, but I order onlinegroceries and I make the
decisions about what comes intoour pantry, what comes into our
refrigerator, and because Ichoose to keep things really
(08:30):
healthy, it makes it so mucheasier for all of us to eat well
, I choose not to bring thingsin that are, you know, big
temptations or we don't havethem in large quantities.
The same thing with you knoweating decisions.
Are you eating out all the timeor do you make a decision you're
going to?
You know cook at home, even ifit's a little bit less
convenient, because you havegoals of consuming high quality
food and also family timesitting down for dinners and
(08:53):
meals, which we know influencehow kids are raised.
And then the third thing is, ofcourse it can.
It contributes to your budget.
Generally speaking, it'scheaper to eat at home.
Maybe things like impulsepurchases or watching TV,
anything you want to add to thatone.
And then next is to reallyencourage all of us to be
(09:13):
mindful about our daily choicesand how they contribute to that
larger daily life.
I think you know so oftenbecause we can live in just
what's in front of us.
At times we say to ourselveswell, I ate a salad today, so
I'm a healthy person.
Or you know, if I eat ahamburger today, it makes me an
unhealthy person.
But the truth is, thosedecisions are just votes for the
type of people that we'rebecoming.
And so if you want a little bitmore resources on what I just
shared right there, go to AtomicHabits, james Clear great book.
(09:36):
But he says you can't just havegoals, you have to have systems
that support your goals, andthat's what we're talking about
in our decision making.
And then, of course, uncommonfreedom.
It stresses the importance ofmaking intentional decisions
that align with those valuesvalues and goals.
And so we want you to thinkthrough things versus just going
along with the crowd, and Iknow that one way that we
consider that is we look at theinfluences that are on our lives
(09:58):
and we think about whetherthose are the type of people we
want to trade lives with or movetowards, or whether that's a
life that we.
It just is not appealing to usand that sort of helps us make
those decisions with societalpressures.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
All right.
The next thing we want to talkabout, friends, is the quality
of your decisions.
So those who achieve the mostdefinitely make the highest
quality decisions consistently.
Let's talk about athletes.
Right, we have one athlete inour house right now that is
getting up 5 o'clock in themorning.
No, he's getting up about 5.30in the morning to work out at 6
(10:31):
o'clock.
He rolls out of bed pretty fast.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
Yeah, he's getting about 5.30 in the morning to
work out.
At six o'clock.
He rolls out of bed pretty fast.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Yeah, he does, but he's out but still, he's getting
to the gym with you three daysa week Before school, before
school, and he's a high schooler.
And we have other kids that arechoosing not to do that Correct
, and then we have others thatare choosing to work out with me
.
The bottom line is qualitydecisions like that will pay off
.
And do they pay off right away?
No, but do they pay off overtime?
Speaker 2 (10:56):
Absolutely, and he's actually seen the muscle mass
growth the body fat reduction.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
Not that he wasn't healthy when he started, but
he's seeing the results and it'sgoing to be pretty awesome for
him.
But even better than that and wekeep talking about James Clear,
but even more important thanthe decisions is having the
system that doesn't require asmany decisions, because what we
know is that decisions requireenergy yes, and when we have to
(11:26):
make every single food choicelike, it's a lot easier to
create some kind of go-to mealoptions even if it's for your
family for dinner, instead ofhaving to decide every day
what's for dinner.
Have some go-to healthy optionsthat are that either you plan
out your menu ahead of time orjust that you have a list or
(11:47):
cookbook handy so that when youcome home, it's time for eating,
it's time for dinner.
You can, you just have thislist and you go to it, instead
of having to decide oh, you knowwhat we'll just do take out for
you know some type of unhealthyfood.
Um, you know, if your goal is,as an individual, to get healthy
really kind of figuring outwhat are.
Um.
You know if, especially ifyou're not trying to lose weight
and following a specific plan,um, you know what are the macros
(12:10):
you're shooting for and how,how does that break down into
breakfast, lunch and dinner andthose healthy snacks you're
going to have in between?
And then figure out, like, whatare the meals that are going to
do that?
Because if you have tocalculate everything every
single time, you might sustainthat for a week or two, but
having to do that over and, overand over is going to get
difficult.
So just having a better systemso that you don't have to make
(12:33):
as many decisions is reallyimportant.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
And James Clear talks about.
You know, when you're trying toimplement a good habit that you
want to have, it's make itobvious and make it easy.
I think were the two things.
There's a couple ways that hetalks about it and it's really
brilliant.
It's just like when you'retrying to get rid of a habit,
you want to make it less obvious, you want to, you know, put it
in a less obvious place, youwant to make it harder to make
that decision, and the oppositeis true when you're trying to
build a good habit.
So so often you know, we saythat we want, we have uphill
(12:57):
dreams and we have downhillhabits and it's because we
haven't set up a system forourselves to succeed.
You know, we have some peoplein our family who are, who need
and want and desire to be ontime, but they have not set up a
system for themselves yet tobecome a person who shows up on
time for things.
So we're hoping that thatbecomes a habit at some point in
the near future.
Speaker 1 (13:17):
The important thing is to make your decisions on the
front end when you're settingup your systems.
You know because, like JamesClear, we're talking about him a
lot today but your systems areperfectly designed to give you
the life that you currently have, and so, if you're overweight,
your systems are set up to giveyou for you to be overweight.
If you're wealthy, you've gotsystems that are set up to help
(13:41):
you become wealthy and likely.
It's not winning the lottery.
If you're in debt, your systemsare set up for you to be in
debt.
The bottom line is we are aproduct of our system, so the
key is to make our decisions onthe front end, implement systems
that support our long-term goal, and then we have to make fewer
daily decisions.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
All right.
Lastly, we want to talk abouttrusting in God's design, and
this is important as Christians,because we believe that God has
a very clear vision for ourlives.
Now.
He gives us a ton ofdecision-making ability within
that.
We read a really good book Ithink it was by James Orberg
years ago, and it wasinteresting.
It's like does God care who wechoose to marry?
(14:25):
Well, he cares about, probably,the quality of the person or
what job we get.
Does he care about that?
No, he probably cares that wereflect Jesus in the job that we
do.
So there are things that Godgives us a lot of freedom in,
and I know, when it comes tolifestyle design, I think that,
again, god gives us a lot offreedom, but if we design a life
that's purely selfish or isoutside of his will, then
(14:46):
there's going to be dissonanceand it's not going to be a life
that's going to be worth livingor a life that's going to be
rewarding.
And so what we look for is howcan we make an impact on people,
how can we steward therelationships that we've been
given within our own family aswell as in our community?
How can we steward our financesand things?
And we know that if we're doingthose types of behaviors, our
(15:06):
life is something that webelieve would be honoring to God
.
Speaker 1 (15:10):
And actually along those lines, when you think
about the parable of the threeservants, the truth is, god
isn't okay with us not beingintentional, not okay with us
not stewarding and multiplying.
Right, you know what the mastersays about the servant who got
one and did nothing with it.
Only you know, finished withone is, like you, wicked servant
(15:33):
.
So the point is, we aresupposed to design, we're
supposed to be intentional,we're supposed to multiply.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
Correct.
And I do think if we view ourlife as a precious gift from God
, knowing that he died for usand we have one life to live,
just one, then it's also aboutwhat kind of impact can we make?
We don't want to just slideinto heaven someday and say like
well, we survived.
No, we want to thrive and makeas big of an impact as we can,
and we also know that we, thethings that we're doing now, the
(16:04):
decisions we're making.
I'm trying to reflect on thismore and more.
We're very young I feel veryyoung, but I'm reminded, thank
you.
I'm reminded that the thingsthat we're doing now, we are
intentionally parenting thesekids that are going to, you know
, become adults and lead theirown lives and I will never meet,
likely, my great grandchildrenor my great-great-grandchildren.
So, a hundred years from now,if God hasn't come back, there
will be, you know, our offspringwill be on this earth and the
(16:28):
way that they behave and act,I'm hoping, is going to still be
honoring God because of thefruit of our labor, because of
the prayers that we've laid,because of the characteristics
we've built in, and thatsomewhere along the way they're
going to know that they hadpraying grandparents and that
they had faithful grandparentsand they had responsible
grandparents, and so those arethe types of things that we're
(16:49):
leading our family with now inhopes that it makes a long-term,
lasting impact.
So we would encourage you, seekGod's guidance in your daily
decisions and your lifestyledesign.
Don't just do it on your own.
Everything needs to run throughthe filter of like God.
Is this for me, if it is open,the doors that no man can shut,
and if it's not for me, closethe doors that no man can open,
(17:11):
and just be clear about thosekinds of things as well as
seeking godly wisdom.
We've done that a ton throughour own parents, through friends
and counseling Just when we'reup against decisions we don't
know how to handle, and that'sbeen really powerful.
And then, when it comes touncommon freedom, as far as
making sure that we don't letoutside forces control our life,
and really trusting God's plan,a big part is spending time in
(17:34):
prayer, both individually, as acop and as a couple, as well as
getting that good counsel andchoosing to run with lions.
You know, if we can, if we putourselves around donkeys, uh,
we're not going to be making alot of lion type decisions.
Speaker 1 (17:47):
Well there's.
There's that really cool storyabout the bald eagle egg that
rolls out of the nest all theway down the hill into a chicken
farm and the eagle ends uphatching the chickens take care
of the eagle, and the eagle endsup growing up with a bunch of
chickens and acts like chickens.
And then one day it sees eaglesand realizes wait a minute,
(18:11):
those birds up in the air, they,they look like me.
Why am I not flying?
And the reason is you're notflying because you're hanging
around with chickens and it's sojust it's a great little
illustration of you know you cantake.
We all have greatness within us.
We all have that you know.
You know there's like we wantto soar with eagles, but a lot
(18:32):
of times our environment youknow who we're spending time
with.
You know we're hanging aroundin the chicken coop and so we're
behaving like chickens and soit's just a great reminder that
it's difficult to steward whatyou have when you're hanging
around with in the chicken coop.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
And God does expect us to have extreme ownership for
the things that we have controlover, and so I think it's even
Christ-like to say I can'talways control what happens to
me, but I can control how Irespond to it and is life
happening to me or for me?
Those are some common sayingsbut truly they do help.
You have that ownership mindsetand when you're designing a life
(19:07):
that you can be proud of, youcan be excited about, you can
navigate even the really hardthings.
It's trusting that there is agood father that loves us
unconditionally and even whenthings in this world go poorly
which they absolutely will,because we live in a fallen
world that he's still on thethrone, that he still has the
outcome in the end and that heloves us so deeply that he'll
walk us through anything.
(19:28):
That's difficult, and I cantell you just in the last you
know, six months of navigatingsome difficult parenting stuff,
I have felt God in those momentsin such a different and
profound way, and it's evenallowed us to make some of those
decisions that were reallyuncomfortable for me personally,
because we knew what we weredesigning and we knew we could
(19:48):
trust God, and between those twothings we were able to walk
some things out that were I meanhonestly, I hope we never have
to do it again.
It didn't kill us, didn't ruinus, but it was very painful in
the moment and, because of God'sfaithfulness and our commitment
, we navigated those, I wouldsay, as best as we could.
Speaker 1 (20:07):
All right, friends.
That wraps up today's episode,but we definitely want you to
tune in next week when wecontinue the second part of this
discussion.
We're going to talk about corevalues and intentional living.
We're going to talk aboutmanaging your time and energy,
which is really important, andwe're also going to talk about
embracing abundance somethingthat we had a radical shift in
(20:27):
about 13 years ago.
So please subscribe to ourpodcast for more insights on
blending entrepreneurship andthat entrepreneurial mindset
with intentional living.
Follow us on social media fordaily tips and inspiration.
You can find us on Instagramand Facebook and.
YouTube and then leave us areview and share this episode,
(20:48):
please.
And if you're going to leave areview, please make sure it's a
five-star review.
Otherwise, just don't wasteyour time and don't do that to
us.
Okay, Like Dave Ramsey says, ifyou don't have anything nice to
say, don't say anything at all.
So if we're not for you, we getit.
Go find something else.
But we really do appreciate you, those of you who are finding
(21:09):
value.
We appreciate you supporting us.
We appreciate you sharing andreviewing this podcast.
It really helps other peoplefind us and this way, fellow
entrepreneurs who are passionateabout designing a life can find
something else that will helpthem.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
So thank you for tuning in, and we're going to
leave you with this saying weall experience pain.
It's either the pain ofdiscipline or the pain of regret
.
So the fruit of regret isbitter, but the fruit of
discipline is sweet.
Speaker 1 (21:35):
See you next time, friends.
Bye, all right, friends.
Please subscribe to the podcastfor more insights on blending
entrepreneurship and theentrepreneurial mindset with
intentional living.
You can follow us on socialmedia.
We are on Instagram, primarily,and Facebook, and you're going
(21:58):
to find daily tips andinspiration from us there.
You'll also find us on YouTubelots of shorts as well as our
video podcast.
And then please, if you enjoythis podcast, please leave us a
five-star review and share us,and remember to subscribe on
YouTube as well as whateverpodcast platform you're
listening to us on.
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