The Day I Died Pt. 2: One Step Backward to Go Forward

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Childhood trauma doesn't simply vanish when the moment passes—it silently shapes our lives for years, even decades. Standing at the edge of a high school swimming pool at 14, my heart pounding as I faced away from the water, I was about to confront a fear that had controlled me since I nearly drowned at age five.

For years, I'd expertly masked my terror of water. I hid behind the stereotype that "Black people don't swim," creating a convenient shield to avoid pools, water parks, or anything involving submersion. This fear wasn't loud or obvious—it whispered like wisdom, sounding protective while actually keeping me confined to a dark, metaphorical crawl space beneath my life. "Don't do it. Stay away from that. Remember what happened?" These quiet thoughts disguised as self-preservation were actually preventing my growth.

My journey included a traumatic fourth-grade swimming class where a teacher physically forced me into deep water, reopening old wounds and reinforcing my fear. But standing on that high school pool edge years later, when instructed to take one step backward into the unknown waters, something remarkable happened: I didn't panic. Though I lacked swimming skills, I managed without terror for the first time. This breakthrough revealed that my fear wasn't just about drowning—it was about failure, appearing weak, and not being enough.

What fears have been silently shaping your life? What limitations have you accepted that were never yours to begin with? Your traumas aren't meant to diminish you—they're meant to make you unique, like an uncut gem. Share your story of what fears have been holding you back. Together, we can knock off the dust that prevents us from shining as the rare, valuable, one-of-one gems we truly are.

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