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February 14, 2025 12 mins

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This episode focuses on redefining love through the powerful lens of self-love. We explore personal stories of struggle, the importance of boundaries, and actionable challenges that encourage listeners to cherish themselves first. 

• Exploring self-love and its importance 
• Personal stories of struggle with self-worth 
• The impact of loving oneself on relationships 
• The Valentine’s Day challenge: write a love letter to yourself 
• Introduction to the Resilient Radiance course 
• Remembering that self-love is not selfish

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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:00):
The love we deserve.
It's Valentine's Day and guesswhat?
This is episode 100.
And today is a day that'ssupposed to be all about love,
and yet, for so many of us, it'sjust another reminder of what
we feel is missing in our lives,whether it's the love we never
got, the heartbreak we neverhealed from, or the way we

(00:23):
constantly put ourselves last.
But today, today is different.
Today, we rewrite that story,because love isn't something we
wait for, something we earn orsomething someone else gives us.
It's something we become, andit starts with how we love

(00:45):
ourselves.
I'm Lisa Dorn, your life andtransformation coach, real
estate agent in the state ofMinnesota and best-selling
author.
If last week's episode onletting go of guilt, overcoming
self-sabotage and buildingresilience spoke to you, then
today's episode is going to takethings to an even deeper level.

(01:07):
We are talking about self-lovetrue, deep, unwavering self-love
, and how we can transform ourpast into resilience and
radiance.
Let's talk about the hard truth, about love.
Let me ask you something whenwas the last time you looked at

(01:29):
yourself, not just in the mirror, but really, truly looked at
yourself, and felt love?
Not criticism, not judgment,not I'll love myself when, but
actual, unconditional love.
If that feels hard.
I get it, trust me.

(01:50):
I get it Because for so many ofus, love wasn't modeled in a
healthy way.
Maybe we were told we were toomuch or not enough.
Maybe we gave love to peoplewho couldn't give it back.
Maybe we learned to love othersat the expense of ourselves.

(02:13):
But here's the thing the way welove ourselves sets the
standard for every otherrelationship in our lives, and
if we don't believe we areworthy, we will keep settling
for less.
The moment that changed me.
I want to share somethingreally personal with you.

(02:38):
There was a time in my life whenI didn't know what self-love
even looked like, and you know,sometimes I still struggle with
it to this day.
But what I did was I pouredeverything into other people,
thinking if I could be justenough for them.
Maybe I'd feel enough formyself.

(03:00):
I was a people pleaser.
I ignored my needs.
I stayed in places where I wasnot valued, in friendships where
I was not valued, in a marriagewhere I was not valued.
And when things fell apart, Iblamed me.
I thought if I had just beenbetter, if I'd just been tried

(03:24):
harder, if I'd just been abetter wife, if I'd been less of
this and more of that.
If I'd just been a better mom,maybe they would have stayed,
maybe they would have loved methe way I needed.
But do you know what I'velearned?
But do you know what I'velearned?

(03:52):
The love that's meant for youwill never require you to betray
yourself to receive it.
And the moment I startedchoosing me, setting boundaries,
speaking kindly to myself whichI still have problems with to
this day because we still getstuck in our old patterns right,
but walking away from whatdrained me changed everything.

(04:17):
So if you've been waiting forpermission to love yourself
without conditions, this is it.
So I have a Valentine's Daychallenge for you, because today
is the day of love, right?
I want you guys to write a loveletter to yourself.
So, yes, this is Valentine'sDay.

(04:37):
I don't know what you're doing,but I want you to take some
time for you, on thisValentine's Day, to write a love
letter to you.
Not a gratitude list, not a peptalk, but a real letter, one
that speaks to your heart, yourresilience, your worth, your

(05:03):
worth.
I want you to sit down with apen and pour out love the way
you would for someone youcherish, like your mom or your
grandmother or your childrenWrite to the version of you that
needed to hear it the most.
Maybe it's the younger you whonever felt good enough.

(05:28):
Maybe it's the present youwho's struggling.
Maybe it's the future you who'slearning to trust herself.
And when you're done, I wantyou to read it.
I want you to read it out loudto yourself, let the words sink

(05:49):
in, let yourself feel it,because the most important love
story you will ever have is theone you build with yourself.
So for Love Yourself, february,I have a resilient radiance
course.
Too many hours because thiswork is so important.

(06:14):
Resilient radiance is stillavailable.
For love yourself, february,because I just want this to be.
Love yourself, february.
I want you to start lovingyourself.
And this course is for thewoman who is done carrying
resentment and anger and guilt,who is ready to love herself
fully, who is ready to let go ofthe stories that keep her small

(06:37):
and step into the life whereshe is the main character.
If that's you, don't wait.
You deserve this.
Sign up today and give yourselfthe love you've always deserved
.
Well, that is it for thisepisode, my 100th episode that

(07:02):
fell on Valentine's Day.
So, radiant souls thisValentine's Day, whether you are
spending it with someone or byyourself.
Remember you are worthy,already enough and already loved
, Not because of what you do,not because of who chooses you,

(07:25):
but simply because you are you.
So go be unapologetically.
You Love yourself hard and, asalways, keep unleashing your
inner radiance.
See you on the next episode.
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