Untaming Masculinity

Standard – a level of quality or attainment.

Every man has a standard. For some men, the standard they have established is one of excellence. However, the standard set forth by most men leaves much to be desired. So, the question must be asked: how can a man raise his standard?

In raising one’s standard, you are required to have an understanding of who you are and who you want to be while being unwilling to compromise. As Steve Marab...

Preemptive – serving or intended to preempt or forestall something, especially to prevent attack by disabling the enemy.

As men, we all too often find ourselves not communicating our plans and not taking action before any number of events. As a result, we can sow discord and distrust with those closest to us.

When we make the effort to be preemptive, we get out in front of a situation by choosing to openly and transparently discuss a...

Appearance – the way that someone or something looks

We’ve all heard the saying, “A real man doesn’t care how he looks.” We all also know that saying is nonsense.

How a man dresses and carries himself is vital. He cannot reasonably expect to gain approval or influence if he shows up looking messy, unkempt, or as if he simply doesn’t care. How you appear is an outward manifestation of what you want others to see in you. Your appearanc...

Something that can be challenging for a man is to find joy in the mundane or in the routine. Life has a few peaks and many valleys, so a lot of the time we find ourselves on the grind.

The grind can feel exhausting, but it’s while on the grind that we discover a lot about ourselves. It’s here where we find our purpose and meaning.

As we embrace the fact that character is built through struggle, we begin to find joy. As we begin to fi...

We all want to win. Not only that, but we want to win big. The reality is that we very rarely win big, and there are days when we must do everything in our power just to cross the finish line.

The thing we can’t do, however, is lose. We often let go of the rope and allow ourselves to lose. Whether it’s with our diets, our relationships, or our careers, we simply concede defeat and fail hard.

Life rarely goes as pl...

Mask – a covering for all or part of the face, worn as a disguise, or to amuse or terrify other people

As men, we all too often put on masks, whether it is as simple as telling everyone that we’re “fine” when we clearly aren’t or putting on a façade for others.

 We all too often put on these masks to hide. We are afraid, ashamed, embarrassed, or too proud to admit that we aren’t fine, and the choice to simply hide can prove to be des...

Ask – Say something in order to obtain an answer or some information.

In this episode of Untaming Masculinity, Dan and Brad field questions from listeners in their monthly ASK ME ANYTHING. If you have any questions you would like to ask the guys in a future AMA, post them on Instagram (@untamingmasculinity) or in the Untaming Masculinity Facebook Group.

Show Highlights

• How do you push past fear that seems overwhelming?
• What can you...

Patience – the capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset.

All too often, we find ourselves getting impatient not only with ourselves but with others. Whether we become impatient with our kids or co-workers, or because we cannot hit that PR at the gym as quickly as we want, we often allow impatience to control us. As an old Chinese proverb says, “One moment of patience may ward off gre...

This week we revisit one of our favorite episodes – a deep, insightful conversation with our friend Ben Kjar where we discuss overcoming adversity and the power of a positive mindset. We hope you enjoy it and look forward to new episodes next week!

We are not victims. In a world where too many people use victimhood as a badge of honor, it’s the men who do not allow themselves to play the victim card who ultimately achieve victory.

In...

We all have failed at something. We have failed at a lot of things. We fail constantly. Regardless of our circumstances, we all can look back at a history of failure.

However, even though we all fail, we have been told that failure is wrong and that “failure is not an option.” We have been conditioned to believe that failing at something makes you a failure.

The fact is that failure is necessary, and it is good. Failure is an opportu...

Inertia – 1. a tendency to do nothing or to remain unchanged; 2. a property of matter by which it continues in its existing state of rest or uniform motion in a straight line, unless that state is changed by an external force.

We, as men, can often find ourselves in a state of inertia. Whether it’s due to sitting on the couch for the last few years or being unhappy through constant poor choices, we often find ourselves in a state of...

In this episode of Untaming Masculinity, Dan has a fireside discussion with our friends Andy Musser and Jake Everett about their backpacking adventure attempting the Pemi Loop in the White Mountains of New Hampshire.

The trip quickly went sideways with adverse weather conditions, and the guys share their experiences of what they experienced together, setting out on this challenging adventure. They found themselves in a near hypother...

Adventure – an unusual and exciting, typically hazardous, experience or activity

We often discuss the need for adventure and doing hard things, especially physically. A complacent, comfortable man is rarely a man who is thriving in his marriage, his career, or his life.

As Matt Reynolds discussed in our conversation with him, a man needs voluntary hardship. Choosing hardship in the physical realm is one of the catalysts to a successf...

Hardship – severe suffering or privation

We here at Untaming Masculinity find ourselves talking about training and working out a lot. Men who work out and lift heavy things tend to accomplish a great deal, and there is a correlation between lifting and masculinity.

The question, therefore, becomes why working out and lifting weights pay so many dividends. How can lifting and barbell training not only make you a more capable man but a...

Barbecue – a meal or gathering at which meat, fish, or other food is cooked out of doors on a rack over an open fire or on a portable grill

Sometimes we must hit rock bottom to realize that we must change our lives. For some of us, rock bottom literally comes at the bottom of a pile getting wailed on.

In these moments of fear, we have to make a decision. Will we continue living the directionless life that got us there, or will we tak...

Romance – to try to influence or curry favor with especially by lavishing personal attention, gifts, or flattery

One of the things that many men struggle with is the ability to romance their woman in a way that is meaningful to her and to restore romance to their relationship.

As John Eldridge clearly outlines in his seminal work “Wild At Heart,” every man needs a beauty to rescue. Learning to fight for the Beauty is not only one of ...

Life – the condition that distinguishes animals and plants from inorganic matter, including the capacity for growth, reproduction, functional activity, and continual change preceding death

Many men have thought about hiring a personal trainer or a coach to dial in their nutrition or step it up in the gym. However, the benefits of hiring a coach go well beyond the gym and the kitchen.

Simply making the effort to go to the gym or eat w...

Code of Conduct – a set of rules outlining the norms, rules, and responsibilities or proper practices of an individual party or an organization.

This week we revisit one of our favorite episodes – a deep dive into creating your own personal code of conduct. We hope you enjoy it and look forward to new episodes next week!

Too many men wander aimlessly through life without a direction or without the focus needed to become what they are...

Prioritization – the action or process of deciding the relative importance or urgency of a thing or things.

Life is busy. We find ourselves being hit from multiple angles with various tasks with varying degrees of urgency. Keeping all of these tasks organized and prioritized can be a challenge. While many tools and resources have been developed to help us stay on task, few are more well-known than the Eisenhower Matrix.

The Eisenhowe...