Boundless Adventure: Mystic Punks

Episode Transcript
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(00:05):
Hello, and welcome back to the Power Bomb Podcast.
I'm your host Sean, and I am alone.
I know. I think this is the first time
you ever seen just me in this room.
And God, does it feel incrediblyempty by myself.
I guess my cats here. Hi Lex.
It was her birthday yesterday. She's playing with a spring
behind me. Hopefully you can't hear that.
So this is a boundless episode and it is a solo play RPG.

(00:29):
Why? Which is why it is just me, just
I I realized that we've never really explained what Boundless
the boundless episodes are and what they're for.
So before I get into what this game is, I'm going to talk about
that for just one second. Boundless episodes are meant to
be a break from Kalos from 5 E in general.

(00:52):
A little bit about me. Your forever DMI love RPGs.
They are one of my favorite things in the world.
I have a large collection up up on a shelf over there and my cat
is running around the room. Sorry.
And the way that I can justify having such a large collection
is if I play them and the only way to play them.

(01:14):
It's hard enough to gather 6 people every single week.
It's hard enough beyond that to convince them to play different
systems. So I created the Boundless
Adventure to get one, get through all my unplayed games,
and two, give myself a break every month or so.
We generally play one separate RPG a month and it's a if you

(01:35):
want to play, we play it kind ofthing.
You don't have to be involved. Sometimes we bring in other
people, sometimes other people are the DMS, which is really
helpful to me and makes me get to experience RPGs as well as
host RPGs. So with that being said, in the
spirit of keeping that going, one of my personal goals for
this year, 2025, was to play onenew RPGA month.

(02:01):
And to meet that goal, we've done one a month on the podcast.
And for this month, a bunch of us are out of town.
It's a bunch of us birthdays, including my own.
And so I'm playing a solo RPG called Mystic Punks.
Also, this is the first recording with the new PC that I
just bought, so hopefully it works as well.

(02:21):
If not, this will just be an audio podcast, but if you can
see me, that means it's working high.
This is a game that I picked up a long time ago at Barnes and
Nobles. It's by one of my favorite
publishers, Exalted Funeral. It's basically four or five
books smashed into one. Apparently these were separate
Zions and they just kind of threw them all together.
It's called Mystic Punk's collected edition.

(02:43):
It's by a Mel. Oh my God, a Mel.
Mel Melaro, A Melaro. I got that on the first try and
I did not cut out 100 tanks. Come on, I will kick my cat out
and then read the back of the book for you guys.
Give me one SEC, Lex. Anna, you gotta go.
You gotta go. Sweet.

(03:04):
Come on, come on. Sorry about that.
She literally waited until I pressed the record button and
then started making noise. She was not making noise at all
before that. And I've been down here for like
an hour. So the plan tonight is to crack
open a beer and play as far intothis as I can, most likely until
one of my characters, or my character, I don't know how many
I get, die. So that's the plan.

(03:28):
Cheers. So anyways, this is Mystic
Punks. Let's read the back.
Students have gone missing at Star Valley High School, and no
one seems to care. You determine that their
disappearance are results of an otherworldly invasion.
As a teenage misfit, you've onlyever used your Mystic powers to
perform dark rituals. But now these powers are the
only thing that can save your classmates and stop a

(03:49):
supernatural legion from consuming your school.
All right, so I got a little character sheet here.
I redrew the map and I got some dice and a little miniature.
Fun fact, this was my first everminiature that I got for myself.
It's of my favorite character I ever played, Adam, so I'm going
to put him here. He's very punk looking, so I

(04:10):
figured he fit the vibe. All right, so we're probably
going to play through book one, but we'll see how far we again.
So I'm just going to go through the punk creation with you.
And yeah, a dark adventure awaits.
Even though you're a loner at school, you can't help but feel
a sense of urgency permeating the halls.
Students have gone missing. The teachers are too complicit

(04:32):
to care. You know these disappearances
are not just teens cutting class.
Quite the opposite. Through the occult divination,
you've determined an unholy portal is open and spews 4th
file horrors. Your Mystic powers are strong
enough that you have zeroed in on the dimensional riff's
location. Somewhere on the first floor of
Star Valley High exists a portalbetween 2 worlds and this
doorway. This doorway will continue

(04:54):
giving way to depraved creaturessnatching young bodies for
unknown reasons. Although you owe this owe
nothing to the school and its inhabitants, you feel a sense of
duty to seal the demonic gate before more sinister beings
cross into our world. Use the dark arcane knowledge to
stop these corrupt forces beforeLegion subjugate more unwilling
victims. Punk creation.

(05:15):
So as a social myth fist, you are an unlikely candidate to
protect Star Valley High, but the school's noticeable
increase. The supernatural activities
blinds blind to most intrigues you.
So even though you loathe the teachers, classes, and peers,
you have to help discover what lurks in these hallways.
The attitude, motivations, and look at your punk are completely
up to you. Dwell as deep as you want to to

(05:37):
flesh out their specific origins.
As this campaign progresses, you'll have the opportunity to
increase your punk's abilities. And like I said, we probably
only get through maybe book one,maybe book 2, it depends.
If we die, I'll probably cut it there.
So determining the stats, we getto roll AD 20 for each stat.
It looks like there is a couple stats here I wish it would just
list out. So I'm using these dice today.

(06:00):
They are my fiance Adea's dice. They're very colorful and fun.
The way that I use dice in any TTRPG is I only use them for one
thing. So if the if it were up to me, I
would go and buy a random set ofdice and then retire them after
this because to me it's like they're out of juice.
I don't use them anymore. So that's a little fun fact
about me. I do that for every campaign and

(06:20):
every one shot. So I have to roll AD 20 for each
stat. So here's the D20.
Very colorful, very pink. First stat is vigor, which is
strength. So let's roll that.
That is a super low roll. We got a nine, not very strong.
So let's write that under vigor 9 vig for short vigor hit points

(06:43):
is your your punk's hit points. It's vig stat plus 5 S 9 + 5.
I can do math is a 14. Look at that live math.
We're also level 1 agility, which is your physical
quickness. See if I get a good role on that
13. That's double digits.

(07:04):
I'll take it. We got intelligence or Intel for
short acumen or lack thereof. Assign five points to other
stats if this is lower than 10. OK, so if this is bad, we get to
assign more points to stats. That is a 14.
So it's actually not bad. I'm looking pretty average all
around 14 on intellect, intelligence, not intellect,

(07:30):
social, commutative skills. Let's rule that.
I got a six on that. That is wowzers, that's bad.
OK, not going to be talking my way out of anything during this.
And then cunning, which is decisiveness and observation
skills. We got a 18, and that's pretty

(07:51):
big. That's pretty big.
I don't think that matters at all, if I'm being completely
honest. So I guess we'll find out.
You start with your switchblade of Krug.
OK, I'm gonna spell this KRUNGT Krugged as your primary weapon.
This knife is soul bound to you and cannot be lost or damaged.

(08:12):
So I don't know where I put thatweapons probably here.
I'm just going to put knife. We all know what it is it's
there, we saw it. This is a very small sheet.
Again, these are printed directly off of the book.
Like here's what it looks like in the book.
This is 2 character sheets. So I just took this printed it
and cut it in half to get one character sheet.
So they're really small. So I'm trying my best knife.

(08:34):
I gave what did it say, plus oneto to fighting roles during
combat. And if I mess this up, I'm
sorry. Play it for yourself.
See if you do better. You probably will.
Other items may be acquired thatcan help you through your
journey. Use them wisely.
So if you have these, I do I have to write my stats now?

(08:55):
Was this part of it? OK, oopsies.
Apparently I was supposed to write these somewhere.
Probably right here. OK, so it matters for the
fighting roles. OK, so if you have a 17/18/19 or
20 and your social stat, which Ido not, it modifies your
converse role, which is if you try to converse your way out of

(09:16):
combat. I don't have any of that, so it
really doesn't matter for intellect.
If you got a 15 to 20, which again I did not, I got a 14.
It modifies your combat role. I'm assuming.
I don't know what I do if I got a 14 and my agility stat was

(09:37):
what, 13? That's also below all of this,
so I'm a little confused. Let's check if if that even
matters. I do.
I guess I just don't add anything to my roles or take
away anything to my roles. That's super interesting.
OK, spells. Through your dark studies you

(09:58):
have mastered a few spells. Each spell can be used three
times, successful or not, due totheir taxing physical and mental
stresses. You can only use spells if
you're punk Intel, which it is status 1010 or above.
You can choose spells if your Intel stat raises through
levels. I'm saying Intel.
I know it's intelligence, but it's abbreviation is Intel.

(10:18):
So Intel choose three spells. OK, so let's get some spells.
These are a lot of options. OK, we got Tundra Hands of
Yachts, A harsh spell created bythe cult followers of the yacht
the Yeti God. Once enacted, your hand shimmer
icy blue and Violet, placing them on an elected victim.
Deer's Piercing Cold Anguish does 5 big HP damage to one

(10:41):
enemy. That's not bad.
King Blaze Roar. Goblin King Blaze Debauchery
became legend during his reign. His excitement during these
revelries manifest into a howl. You've learned to shriek to
dispatch your enemies again. Just five.
Damage to an enemy. Natar's fireballs.
Natar was a mighty troll sorcerer who controlled nature

(11:03):
with a shrewd intellect. Fires one of those favorite
elements. 5 damage to somebody. Hogwitz healing meditation once
the mantra has cited green luminous ash coverage body.
The Hogwit swamp is known for the magic.
The spell can be used anytime during play for use outside of
spell combat. Do not roll for initiative, only
make it successful and tell justthat.

(11:24):
Store 6 figure. So I'm going to take that for
sure. Healing seems like it will be
super necessary so I'm going to grab that one.
I just got to write it down, which I shouldn't put the book
over there. I got to look at it, silly boy.
Sean, that's my receipt. Oh, here's my receipt from Half
Price Books when I bought this originally and when did I buy
it? Does it say O6O four, 2023?

(11:46):
You do the math on how long ago that was at the date of this
episode or when it airs, and it was $12.50.
If you're wondering, Half Price Books is a great place to go for
RPGs if you ever just are looking for RPGs.
Guys, if you have them in your state, check them out.
I'm just going to put healing because that seems easier than

(12:10):
remembering what the fuck it actually is called healing.
Cool, we got that one and we getto pick 3.
Pogniff explosion. In ancient imp tribe, the
pogniffs developed a devastatingspell to horrify their enemies.
Once executed, your body combustand explodes.
Your viscera becomes a demonic shrapnel that ravages all

(12:30):
opponents. Your body mesolier forms after
completion of the spell. It does 8 damage to all enemies.
So this is the only one I've seen that does AOE.
That's pretty cool. Cognitive Explosion can only be
used safely once. For the remaining 2 uses, you do
a big stat check and it must be made to save your life.
A role on D20. You die if the role is equal to

(12:52):
or lower than base big stat. So it's it's it's a possible
suicide bomber kind of ability. I kind of I fuck with that.
That's fun. And then there's level 4 spells.
Can only be used once during thecampaign and can only be cast
before move. OK, so why wouldn't I grab the
higher spells? Am I not allowed to?

(13:13):
Each spell can only be used three times.
That's why not do your physical.You can only choose spells if
your punk stat is 10 plus. Doesn't say I can't choose
these. So roll 1D10 OK.
Oh that's where it comes in. OK, roll 1D10 for level 4 spells
if you're roll 3 or lower. OK, so I should finish.

(13:35):
I should choose these three spells.
And then you get to you get to get these if you roll on the
D10. OK, so we'll take the healing
spell. We'll take the explosion spell
because that's hilarious for flavor explosion.
And then I'll have to reference this as well.
What is this, page 10? Just going to put page 10 at the
bottom because I'll definitely have to reference this.

(13:55):
And then one of the other spells, I don't think it really
matters. They're essentially the same
thing. Let's take the that is, I have
to touch them. This one I just get to do the
damage. Yeah.
So the Thunder hand seems bad ingeneral because you have to

(14:15):
touch someone and I don't know if that matters.
So I'm just going to do the fireball.
It's a fireball and that's cool Fireball.
So we got now you don't actuallyalready have an explosion spell
that feels fireball Y already. Let's do the the roaring one, do
the do the rear. All right, so now we get to roll

(14:37):
AD 10. And I always figure what D 10s
look like. I think they're like, is this AD
10? That looks like AD 10.
It's got the 0 on it. Yeah.
OK, that's AD 10. Here we go.
So I get to choose one spell if I roll A3 or lower and I rolled
A6. So math a math and I don't get a
level 4 spell. Level 5 spell, roll 1D10 again

(14:58):
choose one spell. If I roll A5 or lower, I rolled
A5 so I get to choose one spell.On this we got Lorag's doubler,
A warlock, for Lorag was not shyabout the potency of his magic
spell. J magic.
Double the damage of a chosen spell for two combat rounds.
OK, and Hoogar Stonehide blacksmith turn mage.

(15:23):
Hoogar Hoogar Dunperth names dude concocted this armor for
mystical defense. Once catch, you take no damage
for three consecutive rounds of combat.
Pretty good, Pretty good. What else do we have?
Some in this one's just called Summon 2 Red Slimes.

(15:43):
They successfully summon 2 Red slimes, but is your companions
for three separate enemy encounters before returning to
the netherworld. If all three encounters are
victorious, one slime remains your companion until you until
you're or it's death. That's not terrible.
I mean, red slime seems pretty goddamn good.
Let's take the red slime. Obviously pretty good.

(16:07):
Red slime and I it says on the side can only be cast once
during the entire campaign. I'm assuming it means this level
and below and then can only be cast before movement roll.
So now we know I have to cast itbefore I move, and I can only
cast it once, so I might start the whole thing.

(16:31):
My casting, man. All right, let's move on to the
next page. If you encounter an enemy, you
have three options. You can either fight, flee, or
converse. You cannot switch actions during
the encounter. For example, if you chose to
fight, then you were committed to that action until you or your
enemy's demise. You can switch from spell combat
to normal fighting and vice versa.
Fighting works by rolling a 1D20for initiative for the enemy and

(16:55):
the punk I. I gestured to no one.
Higher roll wins and potentiallycan strike first.
Roll the initiative once during enemy combats, including enemy
groups. Equal for both enemies and punks
negates the attempts. You re roll until a winner can
be termined. Once initiative is established
for the enemy or the punk, roll 1D20 to hit.

(17:15):
Successful hit occurs if you roll equal or higher than the
opponent's agility stat. Otherwise the attack is dodged.
Pretty simple, if an enemy hits you, you -1 from bigger HP.
If I'm attacking, I -. 1 from bigger HP including damage mods
if necessary. So that's where like the knife
plus one to fighting roles wouldcome in I assume.
Cool, no that wouldn't make sense.

(17:38):
It would just do I'd have an extra role to hit.
OK Regardless if the attacker dodged or successful, the combat
round ends. An enemy or punk dies.
Once the vigor reaches 0, collect experience points, XP
and possibly treasure if enemy is defeated and then roll 1D8 to
continue your movement. Rad, is that it?

(17:59):
And then spell combat is the same as fighting.
Punk can attempt to cast a spell.
Once initiative is established, roll 1D20.
Success of the spell occurs if the role is equal to or less
than the punks intelligence stat.
Equal to or less? Interesting.
So you don't want to roll over? OK what?
It's a roll under mechanic for intelligence I guess.

(18:20):
Add intelligence stat mods to spell combat role.
No initiative role is required. If you're fleeing, roll 1D20.
If you're all higher than the enemy's agile stats, your punk
successfully retreats. Resume gameplay.
You got a role for every enemy in the encounter, and
unsuccessful role means that they immediately win the
initiative, and then fighting continues until one of you is
defeated. Conversing is.

(18:41):
We're not even going to attempt this, but we'll read it just for
fun. No initiative role required.
Role 1D20. If your role is equal to or
higher than your enemy's social stat, your punk successfully
engages in conversation. If you roll +5 or higher than
the enemy's social stat, you convince the enemy to leave you
alone. If you're A + 6 or higher, you
convince them to leave you aloneand you gain their XP.

(19:03):
So yeah, and if you do, obviously if you unsuccessfully
rule a converse social encounter, they get the
initiative advantage movement. You start on the square marked,
which I have marked. Oops, right there.
I just copied this map directly from the book.
But this is the marked square. Start there and then this
campaign exists on a map. Astral projection or other

(19:23):
supernatural movement are prohibited unless noted.
Rule 1D8 for movement. Re roll.
Rolled number equates allowed spaces moved.
Your move must be the rolled number, nothing less.
So you have to move exactly the number that you roll, and each
square represents 1 unit movement.
You can move forwards, backwards, or laterally, which
means side to side. After movement, roll one.

(19:45):
Roll 1D10 for the possibility ofan enemy encounter.
Cool. And it's important to note that
if you face multiple enemies in one encounter, you can escape
one, but potentially not another.
OK, and this is just a list of the enemies.
I don't want to get ahead of myself on that one.
And then healing, other than thehealing meditation spell, you
can restore big through smoking.I'm going to try to pronounce

(20:08):
this the best I can call Froup. And that's spelled KHAL
Apostrophe FRUEPA, pure strain of ganja that originates from in
dank Jamaica rainforest. You acquired 5 joints from
travelling from a travelling shaman at your at your mall's
food court. He explained its healing powers
while eating Panda Express egg rolls.

(20:29):
One smoker restores all big HP but instills the following
bonuses and penalties. And then there's basically
penalties if you smoke more thantwo and they stack.
Good to know. So it looks like I got, I got to
write that down. I got 5 joints.
I don't know where to put that. I'm just going to put it under
treasure. 5 joints. Note, once you reach zero hit

(20:54):
points, your character dies. Obviously this is the final
death. No resurrection, no coming back.
Add your punk to the graveyard to be remembered for a hot 2nd,
and then create a new one when you're done grieving.
Very Mirkberg inspired. I like that.
Mirkberg's my favorite RPG if you're wondering.
And then Treasurer make a con check.
Con check sounds so bad. Make a cut check.
When prompted to search for treasure, roll 1D20.

(21:15):
Search is successful if you rollequal to or lower than current
constant. That's OK.
So it's a roll under mechanic for most things besides hitting
it seems like. Roll 1D10 to determine loot.
Items can only be acquired once.If the same item is acquired.
Original loot is cursed, negating bonus.
Cursed items can be discarded atthe end of the campaign.
And then it just looks like these are all the treasures.

(21:37):
So we'll come back if we get anyof those.
And it looks like we get to start.
So cheers. All right, guys.
If you're wondering where I got this map, it is directly copied
from the book right here. I will note that the physical
map that I am using is actually 5 squares less in horizontal

(22:00):
space than the actual one on themap.
So I cut it down by 5 squares. It still seems to work out, It
just might. I might finish like one if I
finish the whole thing. I might finish like one turn too
soon or something. Essentially because my my
movement is D8 based I think. So technically I could finish
one turn too soon, but this is what I had to work with, so
that's what I got. But if if you're wondering why
it looks slightly different, slightly less long, that's why.

(22:22):
So that's it. Let's read what this says.
It says classrooms. You primarily explore the first
floor of Star Valley High. Since you determined the portals
and energy emanates, energy emanates.
Say that five times fast energy emanates from somewhere in that
general area. It would be to your benefit to
search each classroom and administrative office.
You were not only trying to close the wrist, but also to

(22:44):
detect as many enemies as possible.
Creatures escaping your wrath unleash their terror beyond your
school, spilling blood out to the streets.
Remember that. Remember that when showing them
no mercy, you decided to investigate the school at night
to avoid any unwanted annoyances.
By 11:00 PM, you are certain that no security guards or
custodians are roaming the halls, so you're free to explore
as you please. When you arrive at Star Valley's

(23:06):
faculty parking lot, you decide to enter by a side window.
As you crawl into the east hallway, a sharp coldness races
past you. Such low temperatures confirm
your notion of otherworldly presences.
Continue with caution. And then the map shows each room
designated by numeral. Upon entering, turn the page
headed by that number, and then you start on the asterisk.

(23:27):
So that's what we did. All right, So I think we start
by rolling our movement, which again, I'm pretty positive was
AD eight. Let me just verify that.
So when you play games like this, you're really on your own
to figure everything out. So if you do anything wrong, the
one that suffers is you or in mycase, anyone that watches and or

(23:50):
listens to this. But you only know if I don't
edit it out. Roll 1D8 for movement D eights
look like little diamonds. So let's start.
We got 5 12345 and after I move,I think I have to roll a.
You know, I should have summonedmy dude before I move.

(24:11):
It's too late now. You live.
Maybe you don't live and you learn.
Maybe I don't learn. Oh, I forgot to name my guy too.
We'll do all that in one second.I just want to make sure.
Yep. OK, so afterwards I roll A1D10.
OK, so before I go any further, let's name the guy.
I'm going to give him a cool name because he's a punk.
His name is going to be Axel sick name and he's going to have

(24:35):
a Mohawk for for purposes of pretending to know what he looks
like. He's got an A septum piercing
and a Mohawk with liberty spikes, like 4 liberty spikes.
So I'm just going to draw his little face right here. 1234 And
then he looks cool as hell and he's got he's got like a patchy
beard growing in. He's always frowning.

(24:57):
He's got a septum piercing, Coolguy, cool guy, Axle out here.
All right, so we move forward and then we roll AD 10, which is
the one that is has a 0 on it. Sean, you know that I got a
four. Don't know what that means.
Let's check the book. Roll 1D10 for a possible enemy
encounter. Where are the enemies?
There's the enemies. One through 3 is no encounter, 4

(25:18):
through 7 is 1 encounter. So I do have to fight somebody.
It's like Pokémon where you're walking through and suddenly
there there's a Pokémon. So you roll 1D10 again to get
the enemy that you encounter at this moment in this hallway at
night. Where did I roll that dice?
I keep losing my dice. It's this one.

(25:40):
I got an 8 that is a red slime. That is so weird that we're
encountering a red slime after Ididn't summon my own.
So a red slime comes into play. They're Ruby colored oozes that
are more intelligent than their Gray counterparts that attack.
They attack by spraying noxious Crimson webs.
So it appears we'll just use this one as my red slime in

(26:03):
front of me. Kerchow, we're fighting a red
slime. Guys, I have to.
This is my first encounter, so Idon't know how it works.
I have to choose whether I'm going to flee, whether I'm going
to attack or whether I'm going to converse.
I'm not going to try to conversebecause Axel is not very good at
talking his way out of things. Fleeing seems like the the move

(26:25):
here. I got to roll higher than their
agility stat. Do I add my agility stat?
I just got to I could just try to roll out of it.
So let's try that. We're just try to flee this red
slime. It looks scary that what are
these? I rolled A4.
I don't know what its agility is, but I guarantee that it's
higher than a four. Let's find out.

(26:46):
It is much higher than a four. It is in fact a 13.
So it gets first moved to attackme.
I'm going to get out a separate piece of paper to write down the
combat. Here we go.
This is already going so well guys we'll just put red slime

(27:06):
and axle it goes first it's going to attack me.
How much HP does the red slime have The red slime has 10 HPI
have 14 all right and it just itjust attacks me right.
That's how it works. It just swaps at me.
I don't think it has a special ability doesn't say it has a
special ability. So it shoots some Crimson

(27:27):
obnoxious webs at me. How does that work?
OK, fighting. We got the initiative done.
Roll 1D20 to hit. A successful hit occurs if it if
it's higher, equal to or higher than your opponent's agility
dad. All right, so this is the the
slimes roll. It rolled A10 and my agility is
significantly higher than that. It is a 13, so it misses.

(27:49):
I'm going to go in for the stab with my trusty Soulbound knife.
That is a 12 + 113 to do 1 damage to it.
And that does. Let's see, what is it's agility
score? I didn't even look.
It's agility score is also a 13.Is it a push?
If it matches, Let's find out. Equal to or higher.

(28:10):
So yeah, that is 1 damage. I jump in and I stabbed this
ooze with my trusty pocket or switchblade knife.
It shrieks in what appears to beas it reels back to attack Axel
again and that got a 5 on the dice, which misses.
I dodge slightly to the left andI pull my knife out and go in
for another swing. That is A7 I miss as well.

(28:33):
It comes in for another attack on Axel with a nine that also
does not do it. He sprang noxious fumes all over
the place. We'll go in for another stab
with my trusty knife with a 1617to hit.
That is another direct stab on the Crimson BLOB for one damage,
8 health remaining. It goes to attack Axel 11 that

(28:57):
does not hit. I go to hit it with my knife 17
+ 118. That is another direct step.
It's basically just a game of cat and mouse.
Says Axel jumps back and forth, hitting this person with or this
this BLOB with a knife as it tries to strike back at me.
Let's see, they rolled A Gnat 20.
Yeah, that definitely smacks Axel for one damage back.

(29:20):
Axel reels in pain as he falls backwards from the noxious
bloody attack from this oozing ooze.
Swinging with the knife again, Axel does 12 so it does not hit
for the first time. After getting hit for the first
time, Axel reels backwards and jumps forward to try to stab

(29:41):
him, but is disoriented by the pain that the last attack caused
him. Missing the ooze takes this
opportunity to miss, misjudging where Axel was jumping, and
misses their attack as well. Axel jumping in now that he's
recalibrated himself, getting an18 on the dice, 19 total for a
hit on the ooze. Bring it down to six health.

(30:04):
Ooze turn 11 does not hit Axel. He's starting to feel this pain.
Axel swinging, misses widely to the right.
The ooze, also swinging, misses widely to the right.
Same roll, Axel's third. This is just pathetic.
Everyone's missing. Ooze's turn, another miss.

(30:25):
These are this is crazy. We're rolling like within one of
each other every time. Axel swinging with a knife,
there's a hit another 18 on the dice, 19 dealing one damage to
the ooze. It is.
What did I say? Was that six?
So that's at five now it is now the oozes turn.

(30:45):
Ooze swings at axle and gets a 12.
That is a push or no? No, that would be a miss.
Hold on, miss realizing that I don't know.
This might be DM knowledge, but I'm the only one playing so I
feel like I can use it. There's no way to ignore it, you
know what I mean? Realizing that this combat has
gone on far too long, Axel is going to try to do a roar at

(31:11):
this this ooze. How does that work?
Let's find out. Follow the rules are the same as
fighting a punk and attempt to cast a spell.
Once initiative is established, roll 1D20.
Successful spell occurs if it's equal to or less than the punks
intelligence stat. So I got a roll less than, equal
to or less than a 14. So Axel reels back and goes for
the roar. Do the roar.

(31:31):
He got an 18. He he does not do the roar, he
he lets out up, not getting the tone quite right.
The spell still counts as used though, correct?
Let's find out. You can only use.
Wait, what does it say? Each spell can only be used
three times. So yeah, he used the spell for

(31:52):
the first time and it did not work.
Unfortunately, two more uses of that spell remain.
The ooze looks confused as an ooze can, and it reels back to
shoot some more noxious webbing at Axel.
That is a four on the dice. It does not hit.
Axel's going for the roar again.I mean, it's right there.

(32:13):
I might as well that is, there we go A4 on the dice that is
equal to or lower than the the 14 of my intellect score.
So pitch shifting from what it was and getting it right this
time Axel let's out the roar of the Goblin King, sending fear
into this very ooze's soul. Dealing 5 damage, killing that

(32:38):
ooze. Look at that.
And we use up another spell. That was the first turn.
Crazy. This feels like it might be a
grind. It looks like I get after
defeating each enemy, you accrueexperience points.
So yeah, I get to, I get some experience points from killing a

(32:59):
red slime. That is a lot of experience
points. 35 experience points to be exact.
They shoot into me. I feel like I did really good
Chad I I stream sorry, so chats like my go to response for
things. I'm just going to put what is
it? Is there a spot for?

(33:19):
I don't know if there's even a spot for where I can put my
experience points, but I'm just going to put them right here. 35
experience points under treasure, 35 XP.
Cool, But we finished it. Let's go.

(33:39):
I Combat ends and I get to try to move again, hopefully a
little further this time. That's last.
That's four. I moved five last time, so let's
go. 1234 We get to see if we getattacked by anything.
Is that a four? I think that means we do again

(33:59):
get attacked by one enemy. Yeah.
One enemy attacks us. Let's find out what a three
which hopefully is easier than the last thing I just had to
fight a three is a vampire freshman.
A young goth looking freshman comes out of the the locker next
to me just opens up and comes out wiping blood off of his face

(34:23):
as I fight a vampire freshman. Vamp freshy.
How much help do they have? They have 8 health.
I feel like fleeing is a really good option since I already
burned 2 spell slots. So we're going to try this again
let's go for the flea. What is this dice hates me That

(34:44):
is a three. So they immediate it's it has to
be higher than their attack or their agility correct Shan, you
just did one thing you should know let's find out it has to be
higher than their agility stat and that definitely 3 is not
higher than 12. So they get the first attack.
I mean, every time I try to flee, I just get Buku murdered.

(35:06):
Guys. They're coming in, swiping with
their elongated claws, which arejust like kind of sharpened
fingernails, but they're trying.That is a 12 that does not hit.
I'm going to stab at them with my trusty knife.
One definitely does not hit you.They're right.
A stalemate vampire. Vampire freshman goes in for
another swipe with the nails. That is a 12 again on the dice.

(35:28):
This dice is baked. It is loaded.
It's rolling the same numbers every time.
Axel swinging with his knife. Trusty knife. 18 on the dice, 19
total. Two hits for one damage on this
vampire freshman that is 7. I just want to verify that I'm
doing the damage right because the knife gives you plus one on

(35:49):
fighting roles, but what is considered a fighting roles?
Is it the role that I do to attack or is it the other one?
Yeah. So this is just a fighting role.
So yeah, I'm doing it right. OK, cool.
Just making sure. So I come in and stab the the
vampire freshman for one damage.It goes and wipes some blood off
of its mouth as it goes in for abite attack on Axel, missing

(36:13):
wildly, just completely. You can tell that they haven't
taken geometry yet because theirspatial awareness is not there.
They miss completely and Axel takes this opportunity to stab
them in the back with a 16 to hit.
That does hit and I deal anotherone damage to this vampire
freshman as I stab it in the back.
They reel back in pain and go for another claw attack that is

(36:37):
A2 on the dice. Again, their spatial awareness
just isn't there as they miss Axel.
Axel spinning goes for a slash across the chest with this
trusty knife that is A10 to hit.It unfortunately does not hit as
their agility is 12. This vampire just keeps trying
swings for 11 misses. It has to get 13 minimum.

(37:00):
Axel slashing again with his trusty pocket knife that is a Oh
my God math 11. I need 12.
It doesn't work. Vampire coming to be a Nat 20 on
the dice that will for unfortunately for Axel, hit as
it slashes Axel and starts to gointo a blood craze as it sees

(37:21):
the blood start dripping from the shoulder wound it just
inflicted with its claws. Axel touches the blood and goes
Nah today you son of a bitch andgoes for another stab and after
that sweet line completely misses I don't want to talk
about it, neither does Axel. Lot of rolling.
I'm really just rolling against myself.

(37:41):
Is this what I've been doing to people?
The vampire freshman goes for another attack, 7 on the dice,
not enough Axel going for a stab. 1415 gets the stab in this
vampire freshman for another point of damage.
It's down to 5. Vampire freshman goes for a bite

(38:02):
attack that is a 13 on the dice.So that does hit unfortunately
to yet another point of damage for Axel as he sinks his teeth
in to Axel. Axel takes the knife and tries
to stab at 17. It does inflict one point of

(38:23):
damage to the Vampire freshman 4, working him down.
Vampire Freshman with a 10 on the dice.
Not enough unfortunately. After that bite attack gets a
little cocky, gets a little blood drunk, can't hit Axel.
Axel going for another stab. Natural 20 on the dice.
That does smack the vampire freshman right in the back of

(38:45):
the head with the hilt of the the pocket knife is like a
punching gesture. Down to three health.
I guess that counts. I just accidentally threw the
dice, but I got a three on the dice.
So the vampire freshman misses their attack.
Axel goes in and gets a one on the dice, absolutely missing
that attack. Just a we're just kind of
standing at each other, you know, wounds on both of us

(39:07):
looking at each other in this hallway for a moment as the
vampire comes in for another natural 20 on Axel.
God damn. Down to 10 health for Axel.
Axel swinging his knife at the vampire freshman.
This is the hardest hallway I'veever been in and I I went to
public school. 15 gets the hit on the vampire freshman and get

(39:32):
him down to two help. My cat's back down here.
I can feel her. Vampire freshman coming at the
attack on Axel with A9 on the dice.
Not enough. There's an attack from Axel to
the vampire freshman that is a 16 on the dice, dealing one
damage as I slash it across the leg in A6 slide maneuver,

(39:55):
bringing it down to one health. The vampire, now struggling to
stand and wanting to kill Axel, rend him limb from limb, goes in
for what we presume could only be his last attack. 7 on the
dice misses completely. Axel's too quick as he does a
six spin to slash him across theback.

(40:15):
With a 18 on the dice, 19 to hit, killing the vampire
freshman. And as he does the last slash
across the vampire freshman's back and the body falls to the
the the floor of this hallway, he says you suck Fucking sick.

(40:36):
I know. And let's see what we get.
I think we get some experience points, correct?
Yes, we do we get 10 more experience points bring little
man stop bringing our total up to 45 experience points.
All right let's continue our movement, shall we?

(40:57):
I don't know about you guys, butI'm pretty excited to get to A
room five. I've not rolled above a 5 yet
12345 we made it into room number one.
Also I suck at Roman numerals soif they look wrong it's because
they are. So it looks like this is Missus

(41:19):
Tarms English class Miss Agatha Tarm is a respected English
teacher among her peers and yourfellow students.
A well meaning elderly woman in relatively good health.
She's been out for days. You heard some of the teachers
mutter about flu or bronchitis keeping her at home.
Quite normal reasons for her to be gone, but with more and more
disappearances, you believe it'sworth your while to check out a

(41:40):
classroom. Entering Tarm's room, you
immediately feel the same frigidair permeating the hallways.
On first glance, nothing seems out of the ordinary.
Students desks and chairs are lined up in an orderly way, and
the walls are filled with posters of noble literary
literary figures. You're about to leave the room
and you notice a green glow behind Tarm's desk.

(42:01):
Insert green glow noises, Shawn.As you approach your desk, the
room begins to shake, catching you off guard.
You dive to the ground, avoid avoiding chairs violently hurdle
spinning around. You see the chalkboard seeping
yellow slime as it drips onto the linoleum floor.
With you just inches from your desk, the room whips into a
frenzy of shattering windows. Student chairs and desks are

(42:22):
being not sucked out of the broken windows under the
school's long. Tarn's desk, however, remains
unmoved. When you finally reach your
desk, you see Agatha's emaciatedcorpse behind it on the floor.
The yellow ooze still pouring from the chalkboard is now
enveloping her body. Tom sunken eyes and mouth fill
and bubble over with a gelatinous goo.
I'm so sick of goose and oozes already.

(42:44):
Her withered, coarse flesh is now encased in a smooth,
hardened yellow shell. Satisfied that she is thoroughly
covered, the slime drags her into the chalkboard, which
ripples greenish climate. The one solid form gives way to
dark waves and allows the creature to return to its
dimension with its prey. You recognize this as a warning
to those who dare defy these beings.

(43:04):
You hope that Missus Charm's death was not as gruesome as the
scene you just witnessed. Agatha's desk is now the only
piece of furniture in the room. Students desks and chairs were
flung outside, having disappeared.
The broken glass from the windows has regenerated and
fused, forming translucent patchwork.
A quick and messy fix for In a Strange Encounter rolled the

(43:24):
search for treasure in the desk compartments.
How does that work? Also, poor English teacher.
Man, English teachers never lastmore than one semester.
Always. It's like a cursed role.
They get like pregnant or died of oozes, retire.
You know, they just never last. I've never had the same English
teacher twice. Treasure, treasure, treasure,

(43:48):
treasure. Make a CON stat check when
prompted to search for treasure.Or 1D20 searching successful
through, equal to or lower than your CON stat.
OK, so my con stat is relativelyhigh.
It's an 18. So only two numbers can fuck
this up. And that's a natural 20 or 18 or
19. So that's three numbers.
And I got a 2. So that means I get treasure.
Hell yeah. Rule 1D10 to determine loot.

(44:10):
OK, let's get some loot. Guys.
I keep reading. Which one's the 10?
This one a nine, I get a hag bag.
Bag contains 2 cow fruit joints,+2 to social stat.
That all that all happens. We get +2 to our social stat

(44:36):
immediately. So that brings us to and a
little bit higher and eight and then two more joints and the hag
bag. Hag bag.
I'm gonna put a hag bag here. Hag bag.
I'm a low am. I'm at 10.
I started at 14. That's I feel like I could

(44:58):
probably get through without having to smoke.
We're at 7 joints total. That's crazy.
We have so many joints, guys. If we get another hag bag,
though, the bag explodes, dealing 8 damage.
Just so everyone knows. So it's a high risk, high reward
type situation. All right, OK, so there's a
question mark on the map. There's a question mark in the

(45:19):
map that it had me draw to. I don't know what that question
mark is and I don't see it. Let me just look through.
I'm not, I'm not cheating. I'm just trying to figure out
what said question mark is and if it's important for me to look
at. Apparently there's multiple
books here, which I said at the beginning it doesn't show me

(45:44):
what said question mark is on the thing though.
Unfortunately I'm not seeing that anywhere, so I don't know
what that is. Nope, I guess it just doesn't
exist. I don't know.
It's on the map though. Like if you look at the map, I
don't know how well you guys cansee it.
It's right here. Just has a question mark.
That's what I put on the map. All right.
Also, I didn't explain it before.
All the XS are what I presume tobe lockers and all like the

(46:07):
weird like hatch pattern things that kind of look like XS are
just like spaces that you can't go so like building solid
building material. Oh, and this is a statue.
There you go now you're caught up.
All right, well, let's move out of this room.
Oh fuck it. I know I rolled already, but I
meant to cast my spell. It's fine, It happens. 12345 All

(46:32):
right, we're moving to room 2. Let's see if we get an
encounter. That would be a 10.
I definitely get an encounter onthis one for sure.
A10 is 3 enemies. OK, we get 3 enemies.
Guys think I die here. I think I just get to die here.
I think I just get to die. All right, let's roll the three

(46:55):
enemies. Enemy number one is another
vampire freshman. Yeah.
Enemy #2 is an imp. An enemy #3 is another imp me
this might be a doable fight. So I feel like what happens is I
walk out of this loud ass classroom that I was in.

(47:18):
Axel has this cool new bag of joints is putting him in his
pocket thinking about smoking them, and then he walks out of
his classroom and starts walkingdown the hallway to the next
classroom on the right and runs into these three, the vampire
freshman and two Imps that heardthe loud crashing and
rearranging of the room that he was just in.

(47:39):
I feel like I should go for the the runaway because I don't feel
like Axel gets out of this effectively.
So we're going to go for the fleet now.
You have to flee each individualenemy.
Axel's kind of a coward. He's fleed every single fight
he's been part of so far. I have to roll higher than their
agility stats. So starting with the vampire,
he's going to roll higher than 8, right?

(48:00):
Axel? Come on, Axel, you can do this.
That is a 19. So he escapes.
The vampire does not have to fight.
The vampire runs away from him, moves on.
He's like he does a sick like sidestep away from the vampire
and gets to the the imp rules ofthree on the amp does not escape

(48:21):
that amp. But I said I was gonna try to
escape all of them. So I'm gonna try to escape the
other amp as well. But he will end up fighting that
amp and a six on that amp which also does not.
So he is fighting 2 Imps now andthey get to go 1st.
So he does a six sidestep past the vampire freshman.
The vampire freshman, full of angst tries to play it off like
they didn't want to be there. Anyways.

(48:42):
Whatever dude, I don't care. And keeps walking down the
hallway. Doesn't care but Axel does have
to fight to. They get to attack Axel twice.
Axel the first imp flies. Oh I should read the description
of an amp. Sorry my bad I never did that.
And also the description of a vampire of freshmen because I
didn't read that either. Recently turned undead by the

(49:04):
upperclassmen vamps. Vampire freshmen are hungry for
their first kills. That was the description of the
vampire freshmen for guys who read it before.
Sue me. And the description for M's are
mischievous to the core. M's are notorious for their
lethal divisiveness. Most stand no higher than three
feet and are ready in complexionwith sharp filed teeth and
pointed ears. They attack with whatever is

(49:24):
available, strangely preferring ball peen hammers.
So we're just going to assume that both of these people, these
amps have ball peen hammers as they attack us.
And the first one rolled a nine that does not hit my agility.
Second one rolled A1 that does not hit my agility.
I do these sick dodges. I just pretty much like they
both swing at the same time and Axel just jumps because they're

(49:46):
only three feet. So he just, he's got a, he's got
a pretty high vertical. He jumps like 3 1/2 feet as they
swing at their height. And Axel is going to go ahead
and do another spell. And I think you all know what
spell is coming here. We're in a cognitive explosion
on these hims. I figured, you know, the the
pognitive explosion comes from an ancient imp tribe.

(50:08):
So this just seems right, right.All I have to do is what exactly
cast a spell once the combat is initiative successful spells are
equal or less than the punks into us that all right, let's I
got to get less than what, a 14 guys?

(50:30):
I got a 12. So Axel just walks up to these
guys and he he goes this might look familiar.
You Suns up and then explodes, killing them both instantly as
they both only have six health and he does 8 damage in a
massive fiery explosion of his body, his bones turning into
shrapnel embedding themselves inthese 3 foot tall Imps.

(50:52):
And after what seems like too long, his body is going to
reconstitute itself and he goes bitches and looks at the carnage
bestowed upon his high school floor.
All right, so that ends that combat pretty easily.
Let's mark that off. Let's use my one of my uses of

(51:16):
the explosion spell. So now every time I try to use
that explosion spell, there's a chance that I just die.
Just so everyone is aware that Ijust absolutely die.
So rad Cool. I get experience points for
that. How many Imps are worth 10
experience points apiece? I get 20 experience for that,
bumping my total up to 65 experience total.

(51:40):
And in between combat before movement, because the next thing
I would do is roll movement, I'mgoing to choose to cast my red
slime spell because I keep thinking about it and then not
doing it. So let's go ahead and do that
right now. Axel cuts his own arm.
The blood spills to the floor and congeals into two small
beads that rapidly grow it in size, becoming 2 red slimes.

(52:05):
I made that up. That's not even in the book.
I was just, he's doing spell casting.
He's doing some cool shit out ofhere.
I just got to figure out what they look or what their stats
are. Use red slime stats.
OK cool. So I got 2 red slimes, and I
think they're with me for how many encounters, if successful,
I successfully summoned. I mean, I have to try to summon
it. I got to try to summon it.
My bad. I guess I didn't know I had to

(52:27):
try to summon it. Take that cool description back.
Let's see if I get to summon it.I, I don't get to summon it, do
I? Does that count as a spell?
I don't know if I if I, I just. I don't get can only be used
once during the campaign. So I guess I just don't get it.
That's stupid. All right, never mind.
No red slimes get summoned. I cast my arm the I cut my arm

(52:50):
the the beads fall on the floor and nothing happens.
They don't grow like I expected them to.
As the red slime spell fails. I do not get them.
Where's my health at currently? I am currently at 10 health.

(53:10):
I don't want to smoke a joint unless I have to.
I'm not going to smoke a joint. I'm going to risk it and not
smoke a joint and just go straight into my movement.
Let's move. Big move, big move, big move.
What is that, a A1? Fuck.
OK, I move one space and then roll combat to see if I get
another fucking combat encounter.
A three. That is.

(53:30):
No combat, no enemies appear. We're good.
Not making that up. Zero to three.
There's no combat 212. We made it into the room.
That's all that matters. We made it through the door.
We breached the room of Room 2. Let's find out what happens.
You have long subjected JonathanKipp's association with the
occult. By the way, Room 2 is Mr. Kipp's

(53:51):
science class. Kipp is a meek middle-aged man
who dawdles behind beakers whilegrading exams one day, you
notice strange scars on his arm.To the uninitiated, these marks
look like reminders of of a bad fall.
On closer inspection, however, they form concentric patterns
identifying worm priests of Gambler.
These unholy men are necrotic nightmares who command

(54:12):
Gamblern's fierce, feared worms.Investigating his science
classroom seems obvious While attempting to uncover clues
regarding the dimensional rift, you enter the classroom to see
Kip adorned in black and Crimsonrobes, facing you with his arms
outstretched. His Gamlarian scar is now gold
against his Ruddy skin. Kip's eyes roll into his skull

(54:33):
while he recites words in an unknown tongue.
His arms ball to his sides as the spell ends and a portal
opens in the center of the room.Amber clouds swirl and dissolve
to reveal a Gamlarian worm. The large, eyeless monstrosity
roars at you through its drooling ma.
You hear Kip cackle in delight as the creature runs at you.

(54:53):
OK, so we're fighting a big ass worm and you are not allowed to
converse with this with this worm.
All right? Am I allowed to flee it?
I we're pretty matched up right now.
I feel like I can I can make this work.
All right, I'm going to try to make this work.
This is going to be a slog as we're going to go for it,
though. Here's the initiation roll.

(55:14):
I'll roll. How does how does this?
I never have rolled initiation. It's always been they just win
because I try to flee. So how did that work?
Roll 1D20 for initiative for enemy, punk for enemy and punk.
High roll wins. OK, so here's the worms roll.
It is a natural 20 of I fucking these dyes are fucking cooked.
And here's Axel's roll. It is a 17.

(55:37):
So I think the worm might go first.
Yeah, worm goes first. Worm comes in for an attack with
A1 natural 1 rolling, an natural20, and then a natural one right
afterwards. The worm flies at Axel.
He nimbly steps to the side. Not his first rodeo, possibly
his first Wormio though. Axel also rolls on that one.

(55:59):
I have no words, we're just going to go on.
The worm attacks again. 6 misses, Axel attacks A13A13 does
match the agility so it does onedamage to the worm as he stabs
it with his trusty knife. Get fucked Mr. worm.
Worm attacks Axel. 11 misses. I'm pretty sure.

(56:21):
What's my agility 13? So yeah, we have the same
agility so yeah, it misses. Axel goes for no stab, 16 on a
dice, 17 total. Gets another point of damage off
this worm as it stabs it. Mr. Kip cackling in the
background, Worm going for an attack.
It's a 13 on a dice. Does catch Axle off guard.
Feeling one point of damage to our fair hero.

(56:45):
Here's a strong word. Not strong enough for Axle.
This is looking we're like tit for tat right now.
Axel swinging his knife, 13 on the dice, 14 total, does one
damage to the worm. The worm attacks. 9 on the dice,
does not hit. Axel attacks with a knife, 3 on
the dice, does not hit. Worm attacks Axel 17 on the dice

(57:09):
does do one damage to our fair hero, getting him down to 8
within one point of the worm. Axel attacks the worm, 10 on the
dice, 11 total does not. He hits the worm and the skin is
too thick. He didn't apply enough pressure
with his knife. The worm attacks 8 on the dice
does not hit. Axle attacks 3 on the dice does

(57:32):
not hit. These brawls are so low.
These dice are curves. Worm attacks 5 on the dice, does
not hit. Axle attacks one on the dice.
Definitely does not hit. Worm attacks 5 on the the kid.
This is actually cursed. 5 on the dice does not hit.
Axle attacks 2 on the day. OK, this episode is going to be

(57:54):
called who? What temperature do you bake
your dice at? Because what the fuck is the
idea? What is what are these dice?
Axle attacks 4 on the dice. It doesn't like to be insulted.
Worm attacks 5 on the dice. This is crazy.
Axle attacks 10 on the dice. 11 total worm attacks.

(58:16):
There we go. I, you know, at least someone
got some damage. It was that a 18 on the dice
that hits, bringing them to an even stalemate.
Axel at 7 health, decides this might be a moment where he needs
some healing. All right, I'm going to use my
turn to do the healing spell I have or to attempt the healing

(58:37):
spell I have. Hogwitz healing and meditation.
Once the mantras are sighted, you Yeah, you get to do it.
This one can we use any time foroutside of small combat, You're
not real. For initiative.
I just got to try to heal myselfand make a successful Intel chat
check, which I think is under 14.
So let's go for it. And just like that, 10 on the

(59:01):
dice, this green, it was an ash green.
Ash covers Axel's body and he ishealed, restoring 6 health. 7 +
6 is 13, one below my Max. He feels great, he feels good.
The worm attacks 15 on the dice does hit immediately, biting,

(59:23):
biting off some of that ash thatlays on my body, healing me,
dealing one damage. Axel swinging his knife.
This is 17 on the dice, feeling good, feeling confident. 18
total, dealing one point of damage to this worm, bringing it
down to six. This worm goes for another bite
on Axel. 4 is going to miss. Axel swinging his knife, 11 is

(59:45):
going to miss. Worm biting, 7 misses.
Axel attacking, one misses. Worm biting, 7 misses.
Axel attacking natural 20 gets ahit, bringing it down to five
health, and then the worm attacks. 9 misses.
Axel is going to go for the lastroar that he has, trying to

(01:00:07):
finish off this worm once and for all.
Does a spell attack Castor roll under a 14, He gets A5.
Does his Goblin King roar for five damage to this worm,
killing it and using the last ofthat spell as this worm falls
dead at Axel's feet. 35 XP. That's all right.

(01:00:33):
I was looking at red slime. Yeah, well, 35 XP.
It still says 35. OK, well, I was right.
I just kind of gas flipped myself.
That brings me to a cool 35 + 65is a cool one.
Hundo XPI think to level up I have to get to 300 though, so we
are not close enough. We're 1/3 of the way there.
What happens if I defeat it? Turn to 1 dot A if you defeat

(01:00:56):
the word. OK, one dot A.
Kip lets out a shriek, almost matching the summon worms.
Ferocity before death, you filth.
He screams as he walks over the beast.
Course, I'll send your skin fromyour blasphemous body.
The dark priest closes his eyes,beginning another incantation.
Silverware is of hot plasma spewfrom his fingertips while he

(01:01:16):
continues uttering Mystic words.You successfully were the first
attacks your nimble footwork chow.
It doesn't say Kerchow. I just added that now you must
maim Kip before he charged you. So now we're fighting Joe Johan.
Kip, It's all right, Kip, keep grabbing the wrong pencil.
That ran out of lead, but it hasa really good eraser, so I like

(01:01:37):
it. So I'm trying to like, keep it
near me. We're fighting Kippy, man.
Ready for this one chat delivery?
Because what happens? We both roll in an initiative.
Or it could try to flee him. I think I can kill him.
I'm pretty sure I can kill this guy.
Let's try. Let's roll initiative.
Here is my initiative. Axel, it's a 10.

(01:01:57):
Kip gets a 14. I guess Kip gets to go for Yeah,
Kip shoots plasma out of his fingertips, 15.
It does definitely hit Axel dealing one damage.
Jesus Christ. Axel at 11 health going for the
attack. Axel knifing at Kip only doing a
two that does not hit his 13. Agility Kip, There's a 13, an

(01:02:20):
Axel hitting him, dealing one damage.
Back down to 10 for Axel, already lower than Kip going for
the attack. Axel swings his knife, 19 does
get his first hit on Kip. We should kill him just because
his name is Kip. Kip shooting plasma misses with
a nine on the dice. Axel swinging a knife does 13 on

(01:02:44):
the dice, which does match his AC, which hit nine.
I'm just going to, I'm not goingto try to explain what's
happening. It's plasma and knives.
Axe. Wait, no.
Kip 13 hits. They're tied.
Axel swinging, 5 misses. Kip 14 hits.

(01:03:06):
God damn, it's eight. We only might make it 2 rooms,
guys. 8 Axel, 7 misses, Kip 20 hits.
Fuck's sake. Seven health Axel 17 hits down

(01:03:31):
to 8 Kip. Plasma 13 hits.
Dude this is crazy. This dude is more consistent
than something that's consistent.
Insert joke here then. Valor bounds upload schedule.
Just kidding, Probably not. It's me doing everything so it's
probably not consistent at all. K, this is Axel. 9 misses, Kip,

(01:03:52):
13 hits. Can you knock it the fuck off,
dude? 5 dude to myself.
Yeah, I'm gonna go try to heal myself because otherwise I'm not
going to make it the fuck out ofhere.
I'm burning all my spell slots this early.
I have to try to roll under 14. A three is definitely under 14
to heal 6 figure that's 11 totalgoes up from five. 5 + 6 is 11.

(01:04:19):
And I use another healing spot. We only have one left.
This is getting crazy, guys. All right, that's my turn.
It's Kip's turn. 9 misses Axel. 4 misses Kip, 5 misses Axel. 18
hits. Feeling good.
The green clay still on his bodyswings his knife into his

(01:04:39):
teacher's chest, dealing one damage.
Kip shooting plasma misses. Axel swinging a knife, misses.
Plasma, Kip misses. That's a 10.
I had to think about it. Axel swinging a knife, 13 hits,
down to six held this. This healing was the only thing
that's saving his life currently.

(01:05:01):
Axe or no, this is Kip 15 hits. Axel with a ray of plasma,
offhandedly getting one damage. Axel knifing what Nat 20?
So 21 total hits for one damage should feel like usually normal,
but five damn five help left Kipwith A4, misses Axel with A1 def

(01:05:26):
definitely misses Kip with A4, misses Axel with a four hits
bringing him down to four. Help Kip with an 8, misses Axel
with a what is that a 55? Misses Kip with A6, Misses Axel

(01:05:46):
with a 14 + 115 hits, bringing down to three health.
Kip is angrily screaming at thispoint, trying to hit as much as
possible as he swings again and misses with a Nat one.
I've found somebody in that once.
Axel with a Nat one, Did you? Can you hear me?
Can you hear me speaking? Nice.
Well how about you roll some 20sfor Axel?
Only Kip 2, Axel 4. Kip 13 hitting Axel, bring him

(01:06:16):
to single digits 10 down to 9. Axel 1718 on the dice down to
two. Health Kip so 16.
Smack and Axel for another attack.
Axel natural 20. Thank you guys.
Bringing Kip down to 1. He's screaming in agony over not

(01:06:38):
only his own life, but the life of his worm.
Kip with A14 in the field or notin the field in the successful
death throes. Smacks actual Axel for one
damage. Bring him down to 7 Axel.
Can he finish it? No, wait, no, it's a 16.
Yes he can. 17 total on the dice.
Smacks Kip in the back of the head with his knife, taking him

(01:07:02):
out. His body falls to his science
floor next to his worm. Turn to 1C if you defeat Kip in
combat. We Apparently there was an
option to talk to him, but I'm not good at talking to him.
Kip's body slumps to the ground as he hisses curses at you.
With his final breath he melts into a puddle of pink mush.
You're now closer to finding outinformation about the demonic

(01:07:24):
portal. Continue your journey.
So do I, I don't even get. I don't even get lewd or fucking
nothing. I just get to kill him and
nothing happens. Damn.
OK, well, I get the 35 XP from the worm and four ID did that
one and 40 XP from Kip. Thanks.
Kip. John Johann Kip, Norm, priest of

(01:07:44):
Gamblern. Useless asthma.
He didn't even have anything on him.
So that 140 XP shit, that's not awesome.
OK, well, we're there. We got 140 XP.
So rad. I'm going to before I move.
You've heard me before I move smoke AJA little joint which I

(01:08:05):
don't know how to do so let me figure that out really quick.
Once smoker restores all big HP so I'm at 7, I light up it over
the his pink mush. You know the the the corpse of
the worm with all the stab wounds and this pink mush.
I just see that and I instantly light up the dankest joint
you've ever smoked in your life.And he sits there and goes.

(01:08:31):
Shit, it's crazy, dude. And he feels way better as he
restores seven hit points, bringing him back up to his
total of 14, and then he continues his journey.
Let's go, Axel. Is that a four?
That is a four one. Wait, hold on, that one's not.

(01:08:51):
Before I moved, I moved one, butI forgot to put where the door
is on room 3. It's on.
OK, checking the map, it is right here.
This is the door. OK, 123, let's roll to see if we
get an encounter in the hallway.Still smoking my drum?

(01:09:13):
Let's there's a door over here. Let's see what it is.
That is an 8. That is definitely an encounter.
I'm assuming multiple people encounter and eight is 2
enemies. Let's roll these enemies up,
huh, Shall we? A Gray slime.
And then the second one is a six, which is a vampire junior.

(01:09:35):
It's different, so let's read the descriptions of them really
quick. The Gray slime slow moving grace
matches of pus filled ooze from the universe's bowels.
Sluggish in all movements, but surprisingly agile with their
tendril attacks. And the vampire junior
underlings to only vampire seniors.
These vampires are much strongerthan their younger kin.

(01:09:58):
Crazy. Wait.
So they they have they have vampire juniors and vampire
freshmen, but they don't have vampire sophomores.
Interesting. All right, I'm going to
obviously try to escape these guys.
So rolling against the grace line, we're trying to flee him.
We got to get above an 8 rule. The four.
We do. We don't.
We don't and the vampire junior I have to roll above a 12.

(01:10:21):
We got a 20. We escape the vampire junior.
We only have to fight the Gray slime.
The vampire junior says you're not worth my time and keeps
walking as the Gray slime comes in for his first attack and
misses with his Gray tendrils. Keeps obviously going to stab.
I'm sure you all saw that coming.

(01:10:43):
With a 13 on the dice, 14 total gets his first hit, One damage,
bringing it down to 5. Grace Lime swinging with a
tendril. It's a 5 on the dice.
Not enough. Kip swinging with a knife. 8 + 1
is 9. That beats an 8 smack, ever.
One damage, he's feeling real confident.
Another, the vampire walked away, and then he just killed up

(01:11:04):
a worm and a priest. Get out of here.
That's 4 Grace Lime misses with A4.
Kip hits with a 13. Is not missed yet.
Three damage is down to three. My bad, it does one damage, he's
down to three. This.
Lime swinging his tendril, misses with A5.

(01:11:25):
Kip attacking with his knife, hits with a 11.
Grace Lime swings his tendril, misses with A7.
Kip attacking with his knife, hits with a unnatural 20.
So 19 + 1, bringing down to one health.
Grace Lime swings with his tendril and misses with an 8.

(01:11:46):
Kip gets an 8 on the dice or A7 on a dice plus one which is 8
which is equal to the agility score.
Killing this slime slices it in half anime style with slides
slowly to one side as it dies. And I think I just get some

(01:12:07):
experience points for the graceline which is 10 more
experience. I'm so experienced 150 halfway
there. We are halfway to where we need
to be 150 experience points. We also smoked one joint.
So let me just write down that we smoked one joint six.
I'm going to do like a joint smoked tally on the bottom
because it starts to affect you if you smoke more than two.

(01:12:29):
We smoked 1. You all saw it.
Only one Kip triumphantly steps over the pile of grey ooze and
continues his and I kept my got Axel.
I got confused. Sorry.
Axel steps over the the grey oozes little puddle and
continues his his movement. Two we make it in the room 12.
Boom we are in room #3 Room number 3 is the janitor's

(01:12:53):
closet. That makes sense, It's kind of
small. Oh wait, OK, well I, I got into
it but it says here you need, you need a janitor's closet key
to open the store using a spell or any other destructive force
to open the closet. Garner's unwanted paranormal
activity. Unless move along unless you
possess the key. If you do have it, you can enter
it. Shit.
Well, OK, well, I didn't know that before I barged in, so I'm

(01:13:18):
going to say I didn't do that and I'm.
I'm still here. That kind of sucks.
I wish I would have known that before I made the effort to try
to get in. I guess we will fuck off and go
somewhere else. I had three movements, so 123.
Let's see if we can do an attacknow.
We're just in this large hallwaythat's going to take five ever
to get through. Skip ahead about 20 minutes.

(01:13:41):
Come back for me because it's just going to be a movement now.
Two no attacks. We can move again. 1.
So fucking cool. We move one square.
This is a grind, guys. Zero.
That's a 10. That's three enemies.
OK, cool. We move one space and attract 3
enemies somehow. Bad system.
That's a bad way to do this. That's fine.

(01:14:05):
Let's do our three enemies. 9 isa oodle oodle, Oodle or uddle
demon. I don't know how to how to say
that UTTLE demon second enemy iswhat is that four that is a hag.
And last but not least a three, which is a vampire freshman.

(01:14:27):
We've seen that before. We know all about them.
All right, we'll read the descriptions of the the Uddle
demon and the hag really quick. I'm saying oodle little demon,
little oodle demon oodle demon oodle demon demon demon.
Soldiers from another dimension,once one killed rarely quenches
their bloodlust. If executed by 1, you can rest
assured your corpse is dragged to their world for necromatic

(01:14:49):
experiments. Awesome super cool hags are
always looking for supple young teens as necessary spell
ingredients. Their attacks consist of
debilitating, perilous magic followed by Brutus staff blows.
Not awesome. We're going to definitely try to
escape all of these people. Starting with the demon.
I have to roll above a 14. There's a 17 on the dice.

(01:15:14):
So the demon, I just walked pastit.
Don't even care. Now I'm going to.
I don't want to fight this guy. He knows I'm a coward.
He has no interest in fighting me.
I would not quench his bloodthirst.
He looks down on me. I look like a little shrimpy
boy. The hag I got to roll a tenor
above, there's a nine so I have to fight the hag.
The hag will go 1st and the vampire freshman have to roll
above an 8. That is a 14.

(01:15:35):
I do not have to fight the vampire freshman.
The vampire freshman has heard tales of me killing its kin and
actually wants nothing to do with me.
It is scared of Axel and walks away.
With that being said, the hag goes first, goes for an attack.
The hag gets an 11 on the dice, does not hit.
It swings a staff and it misses Axel.
Axel goes in for a stab on the Hag, gets a 12 on the dice, so

(01:15:57):
13 total, beating its agility of10, which means that it takes
one damage down to six health. The hag goes for another staff.
Blow 17 on the dice does hit Axel.
Axel was at full health after smoking that delicious joint.
He now is at 13 health, one lessas the Hag smacks him in the arm

(01:16:18):
with a staff. Axel swinging his trusty soul
bound knife. It's a 1716 + 1 stealing.
Another hit to the Hag down to 5A Hag swinging.
It's. Does it say the hag usually
swings its staff? That's what it's saying.
Let's make sure. So if there's more flavor, I'd
like to give it. Yeah.
Their attacks consist of debilitating apparel,

(01:16:42):
periloussis magic, paralysis, paralysis magic.
He's going to do some paralysis magic at me.
It misses. It's got an 8 on the dice
stabby. Axle stabby misses.
Hag 15 does hit with the staff again on axle.
Other arm is now hurting as I take one point of damage.

(01:17:03):
Axle stabby stabs 1516 total. Does get another stabby on the
dice doing one damage to the hag.
Hag is down to four. These mechanical.
The reason I have so many mechanical pencils is because I
just like I throw them around. If you can't tell.
Hag going for an attack 3 on thedice misses Axel. 10 on the dice

(01:17:26):
does hit. Their agility is 10 stabby stabs
down to three. Hell, Hag 15 on the dice does
hit doing one damage to our fairhero Axel 11.
Also I wanted to narrate this whole thing but I do like 100
rolls of combat. Imagine if I was fighting

(01:17:47):
through people. I'm just telling you what's
happening. If you're wondering, Axel
swinging 1716 on dice plus one getting the hit, knocking the
Hag down to two health. Hag 14 on the dice does hit,
knocking Axel down to 10. Health from 11.

(01:18:11):
Axel swung in two on the dice does not hit. 3 total Hag 7 on
the dice does not hit. Axel 10 on the dice plus one is
11 does hit. Stabby stabs one hit point
remaining on the hag. Hag 13 on the dice does hit,

(01:18:32):
knocking Axel down again. It's a single hit points with 9
remaining. Can Axel kill this hag?
14 on the dice, 15 total. Axel takes one final swing and
embeds his dagger direct or his his knife pocket knife directly
into the hag's forehead, puttingthis bitch down and I think I

(01:18:54):
get some XP-15. Total XPI was at 1:50.
I'm now at 165. Quick maths, Quick maths chat,
can you do it? I can't usually, but I'm under
pressure here, so I'm doing it. All right, let's continue
walking because OK, know what's crazy?
As it said, if I tried to force the door open, it would it would
attract unwanted peril. Paranormal activity.

(01:19:15):
Bro, I'm just walking down a fucking hallway and I'm
attracting unwanted paranormal activity.
Like what are your there's some problems with this book Movement
3123. Let's see if we can attack.
Please. God, no, that's a big attack.
Yeah, that's six. That's the one enemy.

(01:19:38):
Who's the one enemy going to be chat zero with a 10?
The vits hell spawn. We got a hell spawn.
Wow, that's the biggest thing that could appear and it's just
appearing going to be walking. Are we not seeing a problem with
the system of just trying to getthrough?
I guess, I guess if it's for single single players that are
just playing the game, you can restart whenever.

(01:20:02):
But I'm just like, I'm the one and done kind of guy.
So like I'm like I'm going to die 1/3 of the way through.
But then again, not all games are for Sean, so let's read
about it. Vince Hellspawn.
They're humanoid torsos fused with arachnid bottoms make for a
horrific sight. These magical abominations make
for short work of opponents withtheir Barb spider appendages.

(01:20:23):
Vince Hellspawn are the overseers of the Uddle Demon
Battalion. So it's like a spider demon.
Horrifying, not awesome. Definitely going to try to run
away. What do I got to roll over a 15.
All right, try to roll over 15. Here comes the roll.

(01:20:48):
I I hope you can all see that, because that is a natural one.
Axel gives up. Axel kills himself.
No, I got to fight this demon. Demon gets the first attack.
Shit, All right, well, we're just going for it at this point.
Demon gets the attack. Is that a 14 on the dot?

(01:21:10):
Jesus. OK.
Demon hits immediately on Axel, not on Axel at Axel for one
damage. Bring him down to 8.
Axel goes for a stab. It's a 5 on the dice, which is
nowhere close to the 15 he needsto get Demon.
It's a a 17. Are you for real right now?

(01:21:31):
A 17 A 17 on the dice hitting Axel down to 7 Axel.
Those were stabbed. The demon.
It's a what is that a a 16 total?
Do I do one damage? All right, Axel does one damage.
Bring it down to 13. Started with my health, like my

(01:21:53):
Max health. The demon attacks Axel, gets an
11 on the dice, misses first miss, Axel attacks the demon,
gets a 10 on the dice, misses. Demon attacks Axel, gets a nine,
a six on the dice. Misses Axel attacks Demon, gets
a 16 on the dice, plus 117 hits the demon for one damage,

(01:22:16):
bringing it down to 12. Axel or the demon attacks Axel.
There's a nine on the dice. Misses.
Axel attacks the demon. It's a natural 20 on the dice,
21 total. Bring it down to 11.
We're working this bitch down. Axel refuses to die.
He's not a quitter. The demon, you know the hell

(01:22:38):
spawn, it's not even a demon. It's a hell spawn.
Hell spawn attacks Axel. There's a 2 on the dice.
Misses. Axel attacks the hell spawn.
It's a four on the dice, 5 total.
Misses. Hell spawn attacks Axel, it's a
15 on the dice, hits Axle down to six.
Hell, can Axel make it out of this?

(01:22:59):
God damn 6 Hell, Axel stabs at the demon, it's another natural
20 + 1, which is 21, bringing itdown to 10.
Hell, Helsbaum 7 misses Axel, 10misses Helsbaum 16.
That's a hit. Bringing it down to five on

(01:23:20):
Axel. Axel gets a 12 + 1 is 13 is not
15. So what misses?
Hellspawn 11 misses. Axel 17 + 1 is 18.
Bring it down to 9. We are below double digits
people. The ground goes mild.
Hellspawn 2 misses. Axel 9 misses.
Hellspawn 2 misses. Axel 7 misses.

(01:23:43):
A lot of misses going on. They're tired.
Hellspawn 14 hits. That brings Axel down to 4
Hells, if anyone's keeping trackat home.
Hellspawn Wait, no Axel, sorry. Three misses.
Hellspawn 19 hits. Come on, Axel, you can do this.
We believe in you. Crowd starts chanting.
Axel. Axel.
Axel swings. It's a nine misses.

(01:24:04):
Hellspawn 12 misses. He just get 13 Axel 1615 on the
dice plus one is 16. Bring it down to 8.
We're getting there, we are getting there.
Hellspawn 5 on the dice misses Axel 16 + 117 on the dice hits.

(01:24:29):
Closing that gap right now. Let's go Axel.
Hellspawn 15 on the dice hits, bringing Axel down to 3.
Axel natural 20, bring it down to six.
It's six to three. Hell spawn in the lead.
Hell spawn attacking 13, bringing the axle down to 2.

(01:24:55):
This is just a regular fight, we're not even in a room.
Axle attacking, 3 misses. Hell spawn attacking 6 missing
Axle attacking 10 + 1 is 11 not enough?
Hell spawn attacking natural 20.The axle down to 1 axle will use

(01:25:17):
a heel. I think this is the last heel
that I had. It is the last heel that I have.
I have to roll under a 14 intellect check, intelligence
check. But it's it's ITLE.
So what is it? IT something INTL so intellect
roll that is A1 on the dice. I'd roll under 14I gained 6
health back. I'm at 7 hell spawn attacking 9

(01:25:42):
misses. So so just so we're on the same
page this the green clay cakes Axle's body as he looks
slightly, and by slightly I literally mean one physical
health point better than this hell spawn as he comes in for
another swing. 5 misses, 6 totalhell spawn. 7 misses, Axel 17

(01:26:04):
and knocking and making the gap even further as it falls to five
hit points. Hellspawn 10 misses, Axel 10
misses, Hellspawn 13 hits bringing me down to six hit
points. There is no more healing besides
joints out of combat. Axel 3 misses.

(01:26:25):
Hellspawn 13 hits, 4 points. They were even.
They were matched up. It's down to Axel at 4.
Hell spawn at 5. Axel 5-6 total misses.
Hell spawn 8 misses. Axel 1718 total.

(01:26:49):
Evening the scoreboard Four and four.
Anybody's game here, folks. Hell spawn 12, barely missing
Axel. Axel 12 + 1 = 13, which is still
less than 15, so misses. Hell's 1-2 misses.
Axel 14 + 1 is 15, which does hit, widening the gap once again

(01:27:16):
putting Axel in the lead with the Hell's one at 3 HP.
Axel wait, no Hell's 119 hit, evening the scoreboard overall
at three hit points. Haxel 6 misses, Hell spawn 18
hits, putting Axel at two hit points.

(01:27:39):
Hell spawn at three. God damn.
Haxel 7 misses Hell spawn 17 hitting Axel down to 1 Axel.
He doesn't really have any otheroptions.
He used his healing, he used hisroar, he used his slime.

(01:28:00):
He can't heal with the joints. The only thing he has left to do
is his explosion technique, and there's a chance that this kills
him. Just to be clear, it can only be
safely used once, and he used itfor the remaining 2 uses.
A vague stat check must be used to save your life.
Roll 1D20. You die if you're role is equal

(01:28:21):
to or lower than your base big stat, which is 9.
OK Axel, running out of options,his trusty soul knife failing
him, realizes that the only option that he has to defeat
this horrible beast from hell isto try to explode.
I got to do a big role and I gotto get under 9, which shouldn't

(01:28:45):
be a problem based on how I've been rolling the entire game.
That is A5 on the dice. So Axel looks at him and says
listen buddy, it's mere and explodes again, his bones
becoming demonic shrapnel Spearing this health spawn

(01:29:09):
entity. It's a rack and body reeling
backwards from the explosion andfalling to the ground, taking 8
damage. Which puts it at -5 it only had
three health left. And after what seems like too
long, his body reconstitutes itself, putting itself back
together. And he says me and looks over

(01:29:31):
his fallen foe with satisfaction.
Axel very barely killing the hell spawn at the cost of almost
his life. How much XP do I get for that?
It should be like it's 55. That is the the largest enemy
you can face. That's like just on the random
enemy table. So 165 + 55.
So I'm gonna do some math. I'm going to do it, but I'm

(01:29:54):
pretend like I did it myself anddidn't use a calculator.
So the answer is 220, which I ofcourse knew without having to
use any kind of device or anything. 220 I'm an expert at
math. To get to level 2, I sorry, I
might level 0. To get to level 1, I have to get
to three O 1 and then I get someupgrades.
Yeah, so that that's crazy. Oh, I wasn't even supposed to.

(01:30:18):
OK, so I just realized I wasn't even supposed to learn level
four or five spells. But it's OK because the spell
that I got I couldn't even use. I just found it.
It says right here chance to learn a new spell level four or
five. When you get to level 4 or five,
you get to roll to learn a four or five spell, and I didn't.
I did it wrong anyways, and I rolled A4 four or five spell

(01:30:39):
anyways and I didn't get it, so it doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter either way. I I it still ended up playing
out exactly the same. I'm just a silly little
goofball. Don't worry about me.
Let's roll some fucking movement.
Come on. Can I get above A5?
I haven't got above a 5 yet on movement 8.
Fucking finally. Hold on.

(01:31:00):
Let's see what we do. 12345678 Nope. 12345678 I mean, I'd be, I
feel like I'd be touching it. I'd be touching the statue,
right? If I go 12345678 no, I would

(01:31:21):
not. If I go here, that's not touch.
Fuck. OK, we're going to go there and
we're going to risk it for the biscuit.
I forgot to roll for healing. This is going to kill me because
I forgot to roll for healing. I got caught up in the other
thing I did. I'm I'm reckoning.
I'm reckoning on that one. I'm the DMN, the player.
I would have said healing. I definitely meant to heal

(01:31:44):
before I moved just around the same, the same.
I got caught up in the looking up other stuff as a as a player,
I would have, I would have done that.
So I'm going to use my joint andif you hate me for it, you can,
you can say something now, but Idefinitely would have healed
because I was at one HP. And if I want, I can send you
playing the game. That's literally the only way

(01:32:05):
that I can. So I did that just out of
self-interest. I would have done that.
Let's see what the joint stuff. If I roll smoke 2 joints, I get
-1 agility on stat roll, so -1 -. 1 agile stat rolls.
That sucks. OK, well that really sucks.
And now we're going to roll to see if we encounter something.

(01:32:26):
Please God. No 5.
That's one person or two people.5 is 1 enemy.
OK, well an enemy appears. What?
What appears? Sean?
A six. I make it to the fountain pretty
much. And a another.
The vampire junior from before that I told the fuck off comes
back and says hey it's my turn buckaroo.

(01:32:49):
I'm definitely just going to tryto ignore him and contending on
my way. I get -1 to this role because I
smoked 2 joints now I'm too highguys.
I got a 12 which normally would match but because I smoked 2
joints. Don't do drugs kids.
I got an 11 and I have to fight this motherfucker.
So this motherfucker wants to fight.

(01:33:09):
Let's fight. He attacks me.
A 5 does not hit. I swim one knife at him.
A9 does hit. No wait, 12.
That's shit. Fuck.
Wait, no doesn't. Yeah, it doesn't hit.
I'm bad at math. He attacks me.
A 17 does hit, bringing me down to 13 total health.

(01:33:31):
I don't feel it though, because I'm so high.
I swing my cool knife at him with a 12 which matches an ideal
one damage bringing him down to seven health.
He says I knew I shouldn't have taken this fight and I said yeah
you shouldn't have as he swings at me with a 12 missing and I
swing 1/2 at him with a 1314 total.

(01:33:53):
Hit him for six help. Well for one help bring him down
to six. He swings at me for 16 hitting
me. I'm down to 12.
I swing at him. That was a 16 + 1 is 17.
One damage, bring him down to five health.

(01:34:14):
A lot of erasing in this game ifyou're a quick quick Mather
attack from him. 18 hits me downto 11 health total.
Dude, I'm starting to like not be able to see my house because
there's so much erasing. It's like dark as hell. 11 total
tagging him. 13 hits, 14 total. Bring him down to four health.

(01:34:39):
Take that Mr. He attacked me and11 misses.
I attack him a 13 hits bring himdown to three hill.
I wish. I I hope I get a better weapon
at some point. I keep breaking my pencil.
I don't know if you can hear that.
That's a that's a three health total.
He attacked me. That's a 17, which hits bring me

(01:35:02):
down to 10 health total. I'm gonna smoke all the joints
if I have. I'm staying alive.
I'm staying fully alive through this.
You can't stop me high as a kite.
I attack 16 total giving one damage.
He attacks me, 9 misses. I attack him 1819 total and
another one how it's just tit for towers swinging at each

(01:35:24):
other like a like a terrible RPGor like a terrible like a
terrible RPG like a terrible like turn based RPG we're like
and you're just staring at each other in between.
He attacks me, 9 misses. I attack him, 1415 total,
killing him. Sick blow across the deck.
Blood spurts into the fountain. It's cool as hell.
He is dead. And I say you should have stayed

(01:35:46):
in school, kid, because he's only a junior.
You guys get it? How much?
How much do I get? 25.
Was that 220? I was going to go to 2:45.
I'm going to use my movement here.
Five. Shit.
OK, I have to make a choice. I can either go into that room
right there or I can investigatethe fountain.

(01:36:08):
Let's go into the room 12345. Yeah.
All right, we are in room. What is that?
5V is for five. I'm pretty sure my favorite
movie is V for Vendetta. I should know this.
Mr. Bilber, Mr. Mr. Burbill's office.
Kyle Burbill is Star Valley's guidance counselor.

(01:36:29):
You don't know much about him because of your outsider status
and no obvious needs for guidance, academic or otherwise.
Besides, it's pretty well known amongst faculty, staff and
students that you walk a solitary path.
Entering his office is a new experience.
An ornately carved mahogany deskand leather chair situated in
the back of the room. A turned off computer screen,

(01:36:49):
various student records and files of a small and files and a
small tent of mints rest neatly on the desk.
You walk behind the desk and examine Burbill's library.
Teenage development, psychology books and journals make up the
majority of his reading. You smirk while flipping through
Black smoke, White lies observation on smokeable
narcotics used by teens by Doctor Hamlin S Slim, PhD.

(01:37:12):
Surprisingly enough, fairly accurate depiction are present.
You return the book and begin toleave when the computer screen
flicks on with a loud hum. You walk back to the desk and
see the screen flip between blueand black, with the occasional
white lines crossing it. It finally rests on a deep blue
hue as a pixelated green face emerges.
The face is androgynous with closed eyes and mouth.

(01:37:34):
With another deep hum, it's eyesdon't open and look at you.
Sit down. It commands in a metallic voice.
Burbell's leather chair comes. Leather chair comes from behind
you to make you lose balance. You fall into the chair as it
rolls through to the desk. You are tightly between the
desk, pinned between the desk chair and the digital face in
front of your own. I am Nazez Point O 6 Lop, a

(01:37:56):
digital spectre possessing this mechanical host.
My main objective is to stop your investigation and absorb
your occult power. Prepare for a simulation as as
eyes close while a coaxial cablebreaks from a nearby nearby
Wi-Fi modem. The capsule.
The cable however snake like above the screen until the
coaxial melts and do a silver 4 inch spike.

(01:38:20):
At first the sight bewilders you, but that soon gives way to
excruciating pain as the as the sharp ball bursts from into your
forehead. You let out a loud shriek but
soon whimper into compliance with half closed eyes and
partially open mouth. This thing is sucking your dark
knology from you and soon your life.
You have three chances to make asuccessful intelligence stat

(01:38:42):
roll. If you roll your intelligence
stat or lower, you have much enough mental energy or force to
remove the coaxial spike from your head.
If your intelligence stat check is failed and Nazesh has
successfully taken to assimilateyour knowledge, killing you in
the process, your main in there.OK, so let's let's find out.
So we got to roll my intelligence.
That or lower, which is a 14. I have three chances to do so.

(01:39:07):
That is a three. I do it on the first.
I'm dumb as hell. I just ripped this thing out.
So yeah, I pull it out. That's it.
I defeat it. The cracked screen flashes and
sputters. Well, Nazesh point O 6 the lops
fractured face. It's grasped on you weekends and
enables you to roll back from the desk.
You stand and spit out and spit on the baffled inspectors

(01:39:29):
bitches of the stairs blankly atback at you Walmart yours
victory. It's stammers.
Nezesh mouth opens. His voice goes out a single key
with an attached key chain. The key gradually punches the
screen and in a weirdly wet mess, dribbles onto the desk.
It gasps before it freezes on the screen.
Key in hand, you leave Barbell'soffice with white hot sparks.

(01:39:52):
Continuing shooting from the thecomputer desk.
You look at the chain and asked.It says Janitor's closet.
Continue your journey. All right, well we got the
janitor key which is back there,but I think we should check out
that statue if we get a chance here.
What is that? A3123I?
Make it out of the the room. If I get attacked 2 I do not

(01:40:16):
cool. That means I get to keep moving.
512345 We make it to the corner we're at the statue, an
elegantly sculpted white marble tiger, Star Valley's mascot is
situated in the center of the first floor hallway, Captured in
ferocious midpounce towards imaginary prey.
The statue is approximately 6 feet tall and extremely smooth

(01:40:39):
from students constantly touching it.
It seems the portal is not negatively affecting the statue.
In fact, it seems to get off give off an inviting steal.
Oh my God, teal glow. I guess if I decide to touch it
I get all my HP back. I'm only missing 4, but I'm
probably not going to come back this far again, right?
So I should probably just touch it now.

(01:41:01):
Yeah, I'm going to touch it. I choose to touch it.
It can only be used once, so I am back up to full health.
Guys, it infuses me with a teal blow.
Let's keep moving. Dude, we're pretty close to that
room 512345. We are in room.
What is that? I don't know these numbers.
I don't know what could be map. What?

(01:41:24):
What, what what room is this, would you say?
Sean, it is VII. That's seven.
We're in room 7. Let's see what?
Room 7. Where the fuck is room 7?
They're supposed to do a separate book.
I OK, well, I guess we're in a separate book.
Guys, can I, should I not have done that?
Seven. OK, No.
Yeah, we. I don't know if I was supposed

(01:41:45):
to go here, but I don't see why I couldn't.
I I don't see why I can't go here.
There's no reason it says that Ican't.
I I don't really want to to readthis because I I feel like
that's spoiler but I'll read what it says.
It's under book two more classrooms.
Hun Bell O Fanahan disappears back into the either once you've

(01:42:07):
chosen a character class. I didn't though cuz I'm not
there cuz I don't. When do I get to choose a?
Why would I get to choose a character class?
When does that even happen? When would I get to choose a
character class? Hold on, I'm so confused cuz I

(01:42:28):
finished the statue and then I would turn the page and it goes
into a whole other thing which is its own, which is room 6.
So it, it just assumes you go toroom 6 before you go to room 7.
But I'm closer to room 7 so I'm gonna go to room 7 and we're
just gonna let it play out as it.
That's really dumb. We're just gonna let it play out

(01:42:50):
and whatever happens, happens. Guys.
Vice principal flanks office Pink smoke billows from Miss
Audrey flanks office. Before you even step in, you
enter and barely see the lush velvet drapes covering the
windows through the haze. An ornately carved marble throne
is in the center, flanked by twobrassieres, an apparent source
of purple smoke. No sign of flank is apparent.

(01:43:10):
Seated cross legged on the throne is a lavishly dressed
male in his 20s. His black hair is slightly
disheveled through other, thoughotherwise he's pristine in
appearance, similar to late 18thcentury dandy.
The count points at you. From the pink smoke materializes
a full glass of wine. It floats towards you at eye
level, stopping within an arm's grasp.

(01:43:33):
Although your society laws deem you too young, immature even, to
imbibe in this delicious Merlot,Ioffer you a new world vacant of
such rules. Drink up, young master.
You take the stem, but are too skeptical to drink its contents.
Von Schumel notes your doubt andlets out a heavy sigh.
Snubbing my peace offer. Fine, I implore you, please stop

(01:43:56):
your senseless fighting against the XOFL, the Fall, the Zofal.
Their victory is imminent, and the rain will ensure a better
life for all humans. And it starts with their
enslavement. You know better than most the
majority are not worth saving, but those who understand magic
will be spared. Revered even amongst the Zofol

(01:44:16):
upper echelon. I come as an emissary with a
generous proposal. From their high council, it has
been decided that you shall be given a modest estate on the
Zofol dream realm. Also, you will command an order
of their finest warlocks who will share their knowledge with
you. You must, however, be willing to
drop arms against them and let them fulfill their conquest
against the world, with a small price to pay, considering you'll

(01:44:37):
be a rising star in those awful ranks.
You grimace at the offer. Von Schumel raises the left hand
and from the smoke produces phone glass of red wine.
He takes back large gulps and continues.
You see, young gun, when you've been on this earth as long as I
have, you've grown tiresome of endless human follies.
Quite simply, they are doomed toextension by their own hands.
The awful will promptly end their suffering.

(01:44:59):
I'll be through violent means regardless.
Take the proposition. I assure you it won't be offered
again. You smash the glass on the floor
and mutter vampire through gritted teeth.
Oh no, no, no, that would be someone else.
I'm a Mystic, much like yourself, whose endless occult
occultist toils have granted me power of immortality.

(01:45:20):
Well, at least I think I'm immortal.
I've been roaming the earth for nearly 300 years with no
intention of stopping. Ha ha.
You smirk, cracking your knuckles, ready to test his
claims of an immortal life. A melee is it?
Muses Von Schumel, running his fingers through his hair.
Come them and perish like the countless before you.
So apparently I'm fighting this dude, Count Norville Von Schumel

(01:45:42):
should have gone to this room, Iguess.
It's got 25 HP, it's got 15 agility, it's got 18 social.
It's got a special as well. Von Schumer will dissipate into
pink smoke filling the room every 3rd combat round.
Indiscernible from the smoke in the room, he physically pummels
you as an attempt to locate his corporeal form.
It does a lot of damage. He triples his damage every 6th

(01:46:04):
combat round. Oh my God OK that sucks for me I
guess. How does conversating work?
I just, I need to know if it's worth it for me to try to even
attempt this. No initial roles required.
Role 1D20 if your role is equal to or higher than the enemy
social skill. He's successfully engaging
conversation. So his his is 18.

(01:46:26):
So I'd have to roll above an 18 to even conversate with him Or I
can just try to fight him. I feel like it's worth it to
try, you know, just like to see what happens.
So I'm going to go for the conversate.
I got a role if I get any, I don't get any bonus.
I get wait, was it a -, 2 No, I get no minuses to conversate.
Let me I smoke joints. So I'm just trying to know what

(01:46:47):
I did yeah, I get no minuses on on any conversation.
So I got to roll like a 19 or a 20 to even get this conversation
started. I rolled A2.
That's not happening. So he gets to go first.
He tags at me, one misses. I tagging him a 19 hits doing

(01:47:12):
one damage. I stab at him with my knife
haha. Was he at 20 is at 25 he's at
24. And also I got to keep track of
the rounds for this one. So here's a Round 1 he attacks
me 18, I take damage, I'm at 13,I attack him 1516 total.

(01:47:40):
So that's it. And that's another round.
Round three attack. All right now he attacks, he
misses with an 8, I attack, I hit with a 17.
All right, and that is the thirdround.
And then on the third round, smoke fills the room every 3rd
comment round indiscernible. He physically follows you.

(01:48:05):
So his if he hits this time, he would do 4 damage instead of 1.
I just hit him so it's his turn.He misses with the 10, so we're
good. I attack him 11-12 total miss.
That's round four. Sorry.
His attack. Round 514 does hit for one,
which puts me at 12. I attack him for 12, total miss.

(01:48:31):
That's around 5:00. This is around six.
His attack. Wait, no, it was around 5 S This
is 4 misses, Isaac, him, seven misses.
Now we're on 6. So now it triples every three
rounds. So 12 if he hits here, I die if

(01:48:51):
he hits here, guys, you got a 19?
Yeah. So is able to triple the damage
every sixth round. This is the sixth round he hits.
It does 12 damage, instantly killing me and a crowd of pink
smoke. I die in this room to what was

(01:49:13):
his name? Norville Von Schumel
unfortunately kills our hero Axel.
He gets pummeled to death in a room full of pink smoke while
attempting to make his way through his high school and save
what sounds like some kind of alien invasion.

(01:49:34):
Prevent that so you can grieve him in your own way.
I'm going to grieve him by drinking the rest of my beer and
eating some dinner with my family.
Thank you for joining me on thisepisode of Valorbound.
Again, this was Mystic Punks is a solo RPG.

(01:49:55):
Give it a run. It's really interesting.
I'm not a fan of how grindy the mechanics were, but it was
pretty fun overall. The narrative is fun and I like
the the storytelling and the idea that you're just like an
occultic punk. It's very fun.
I probably play this again on myown.
So Valorbound is a Lost Cause Media production and I'm Sean.
I'll catch you guys next time. Bye Lost Cause Media.

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