May 15, 2024 • 65 mins
Jess and Vanessa are joined by Jenni, co-host of the Long Term Pickles podcast!
We aimed for a lighter theme this week, as last episode was a bit... heavy.
Of course, as we're wont to do, we do get into heavier stuff at the end. Ope. Enjoy the show! We had fun doing this, and Vanessa has been itching to share her Natalie Knepp story!
Jenni's Podcast, Long Term Pickles: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/long-term-pickles/id1721838360
The Sam movie: https://youtu.be/0551Lp2I0F4?si=7d2xDZ-K8cQoSWJo
Natalie Knepp's IG (follow and support her!): https://www.instagram.com/natalieknepp
Executive Producer and Host: Vanessa Joy: https://linktr.ee/vanesstradiol
Vanesstradiol Podcast - Copyright © 2023-2025 Vanessa Joy
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Vanessa (00:00):
The views and opinions of the hosts and guests on
(00:02):
transcending humanity are theirown and not those of the
respective employers. Thank youso much for listening to or
watching the show. Pleasesubscribe to our Patreon at
patreon.com/transcendinghumanity. We really appreciate
the support. Thank you.
Unknown (00:18):
Where's Doc? I'm sorry, who are you here to see Doc? Dr.
Andrew Bellamy. OBGYN is has aright there on the door. Well,
Dr. Bellamy's for the patientright now. Okay, well, I need to
see him now. Okay, young lady,please calm yourself down. Yes,
please. Oh, mind your ownbusiness Miss STD.
Okay, you know what? I will setup an appointment for you with
(00:40):
Dr. Belen. pagelets don't messwith me pitch
Doc nagarsol Good. Happy to meetyou. Look at me. Yes, please.
I am in the middle of anexamination here.
Would you tell Trish route Sallyin a wait a turn? Oh,
(01:02):
shut the hell up. Lady. Doc. Youdo not behave.
I will call security Angie. Thatwon't be necessary. Help me with
Ms. Goldfarb here. We're gonnamove you to another room. An
angel. What are you know?
Vanessa (01:17):
Angie won't be long.
Unknown (01:21):
Doc. I don't know what happened. Man. I woke up this
morning and I'm fucking broad.
There are a lot of psychologistsoffice in the building. Are you
sure you didn't walk into thewrong one
duck? You gotta believe me. Ifeel like I'm in this like this
nightmare. Like I just keepwaiting to wake up. Dude, it's
me.
It's Sam. Sam. Sam. Sam Wellman,your best friend.
(01:46):
Okay, very good. How much is hepaying? You
asked me something. asked meanything. Really? I get the
joke. Ya know, they asked mesomething about about Cynthia.
You know about Cynthia. Dude, Iknow everything about you your
boo boo. She's susuhe told you that. Oh, you
were nine years old. You showedit to Lauren Abramsky. She
(02:06):
kicked you in the knots. Youtold your mom you fell off the
swing. He told you that I wasthere. Dude. I practically
carried you home. Oh, seniorprom. Sandy O'Malley gave you
your second blow job under thebleachers. Your
first blow job March 1 1993 LisaKaminski in your basement your
mom came home. That prick didn'ttell you that prick. Oh DNA.
(02:32):
Miss please. Put down thescissors
doc DNA DNA. Get a DNA testdone.
Great. Please the scissorsbefore someone gets hurt. Yeah,
but Doc, you have the bloodfrom the paternity suit. We get
a DNA test done. Yeah.
Okay. Sure. Great. No, I'm gonnascissors and go home and get
some rest.
Okay, but you're gonna do you doit right away. As soon
(02:52):
as you leave it goes right tothe DNA office or whatever.
Okay? Yeah, sure. Great. You'regonna do it. Uh huh. Okay, just
relax. Go home. Okay, get somerest. All right. Fucking Sam
Jesus.
Vanessa (03:12):
All right. Hello, everybody. Welcome back to
transcending humanity. This isepisode 40. We have made it to
40 episodes, somehow. Just afriendly reminder, please
remember to rate us.
Subscribe to us. And, you know,support us on Patreon
patreon.com/transcending.
Humanity really helps. And youknow, it just really helps.
(03:35):
Today, I am joined by chess, aseverybody knows. And also my
girl, Jenny, who is areessentially random guests today.
I'm like, Hey, Jenny, do youwant to join? And she's like,
Yeah, sure. So Jenny runs apodcast called longterm pickles.
(03:56):
AndJenny Can you want to give that
a little plug really quick?
Jenni (04:04):
I would love to you and thank you longterm pickles as a
podcast for just like checkingout mentally and listening to
something hopefully that youknow, sometimes the topics are a
little heavier. We try not toget too heavy. We try to keep
them really light. But it's justa place to maybe come listen and
I don't know feel like you'rechatting with some besties about
some silly stuff. We, we laugh alot. We have a really good time.
(04:27):
Andcurrently, it's not. We don't
have anything new up because wegot in the middle of some
nonprofit work we were doing andthat really took precedence. So
for right now we are just we'regearing back up in June. Now
we're starting back up in June.
And we are going to have alittle more of a theme oriented
topics even though they'll stillbe pretty random. And in each
(04:50):
episode, we try a new pickle orpickle adjacent snack. So we've
had a lot of fun with that and
Vanessa (05:00):
Dad, I look forward to continuing I trans girls that
listen to the show, if you'restill in Spyro definitely listen
to that to get some picklerecommendations.
Jess, what's going on with you?
I think fine.
Jess (05:14):
I I'm happy to be back on the show. It's been about I
don't know, maybe a month ormore happy that we're back up
and going and you're,you know, feeling better?
Vanessa (05:29):
I'm not trying to.
Jess (05:31):
Yes. All around in, in all of in all the ways. That's
wonderful. So yeah, I mean, I'mhappy to be back what's been
going on ii have been really kind of just
like,I haven't been up to my normal
projects and stuff as much as Iusually am. I've been kind of
taking a, like I've been, well,I say that I've been doing like
(05:52):
house projects, and not like allmy online, you know, kind of
more activism advocacy stuff.
And it's been kind of, it's beengood to take a break, and kind
of regroup a little bit on that.
But I'm also like, starting tofeel the itch to get back to
some things. But yeah, I've beendoing very just kind of physical
like gardening and just tryingto be and setting things up for
(06:13):
the change of season and, andwhatever. Yeah, so it's, it's
kind of felt like a little bitboring. And like a really good
way.
Vanessa (06:26):
If we, those kinds of breaks, minute breaks are
important, especially whenyou're in advocacy. And because
you have to pour your heart andsoul into it. And it's fucking
draining, especially when youhave so much animosity being
pushed against you all the time,too. So it's nice to be able to
just get out and pull someweeds. Yeah, yeah, kind of put
(06:48):
it on. I've been doing the, youknow, spending less time on
social media and, and liketrying to do the balance of
staying informed and,
Jess (06:58):
you know, doing good for myself and my own mental health
and physical health and all ofthat. So, yeah. Good.
Vanessa (07:13):
Yeah, I believe my little clicking the button right
here that Oh, and for all myhacks and Copson, wheezes and
all that wonderful stuff. Soworking my vocal training here.
So this week, we are going to dosomething a little bit less, a
little bit lighter. Because lastweek was kind of heavy. If you
(07:34):
listened to that episode, it washeavy. Or I guess two weeks ago,
we do this every two weeks,totally.
My brain doesn't work. SoI thought we'd just share some
stories. Either be fun thingsgoing on, or just good fun,
whatever. And do to mind if Istart with mine, and then we go
(07:56):
to you. Okay, so part of thetrans experience. I don't know
if it's the same for NBS andtrans masks. But just did you
have like kind of a? Are youdrawn to gender Bender movie,
especially before you came out?
Jess (08:18):
I mean, I'm always drawn to like,
queer stuff. Yeah. You know,but, but I don't know. Yeah, I
mean, gender Benderspecifically.
But yeah, I mean, anythingqueer? I'm kind of open.
attached to? Yeah, yeah.
Vanessa (08:37):
I know, with trans friends a lot. And like,
body swap movies, like where,you know, boy, because girl,
girl becomes boy, whatever.
When our eggs are cracking,those kind of kinda jump out at
us. When my egg was cracking, Iwas watching
(15:08):
I'll be taking her on this. Sheactually, I made a little reel
earlier today and mentioned heron it. And she shared it. So I
asked her if she want to be ontonight, but she's out singing a
show. So unfortunately, shewon't be here, but maybe I guess
in the future. But yeah, that'sjust kind of my just random fun.
Like,how, I guess maybe it's just how
(15:29):
my brain works? I don't know, isit? Is it an autistic thing to
just like, grab on to somethinglike that? And like, be like, I
have to figure this out. But soyeah, I have a connection with
her going back like 27 years.
Who knows if I met her in thepast? I don't know.
But I just think it's kind ofcool. So I'm hoping to be able
(15:50):
to reconnect with her mom, too.
I reached out to her, but Ihaven't heard back. But it's
just, it's just kind of fun. Soyeah, that's my story. Small
World stuff. For sure. It reallyis. Yeah, it's definitely a
small world. So but it was Ibelieve it was like a media
(16:10):
class. So at the time, I was, Iwas raised as a good little
Republican boy. And and Hudsonwas a very conservative town,
and she was a very liberalteacher. And I was so
brainwashed by my father that atthe time, I just thought she was
(16:31):
like, she was a kook. But nowI'm like, she's my people. But
so it's just kind of wild, justthinking back on it, and how
people just kind of like, makeimpressions on us in one way or
another. And it just it lastthree years, like 27 years ago.
Like why do I remember this? Whyis Natalie space so like,
(16:56):
familiar to me? And some peoplejust really look like their
parents? I guess. So. Natalie,and check if you're watching
this, I think you and definitelycheck out Natalie. Look at her
work. Cem is just a fun movie.
Especially if you're trans it'sor if your egg is starting to
(17:18):
crack. It's just fun to watch.
The the romance in it hits theyhave pretty good chemistry.
There's a lot of plot holes.
Like how does this girl suddenlyhave all these clothes that fit
her out of absolutely nowhere,but yeah, so that's my story.
(17:38):
Who wants to share something funthat's going on with them?
Jess (17:45):
Awkward silence awkward silence just Oh, man. No, that's
a cool story. I think it's atrip How?
How like, there really is. Whatwas that game? It's like Six
Degrees of Kevin Bacon. Right?
I've heard of that. Yeah, right.
Yeah. Or it's like think thatone's supposed to be like
(18:08):
anybody in Hollywood isconnected to Kevin Bacon anybody
period I think anybody that'sreally the thing though, you
know is like it kind of ends upbeing that I don't have any
really, really cool it's funnylike like I mentioned before we
started recording you you knowtalked about the topic and I was
just like I got I got nothing Igot nothing but I have been
(18:32):
thinking though today about howit is just interesting how we
are all you know connected insome way and I guess a lot of
people think about it with like,you know, if there are any
celebrity connections or youknow people that you know who
are connected that way justbecause it's it's easier to say
like this is somebody who is notin my circle this like super
(18:53):
celebrity person who like livesin LA or New York or has like
five houses or like whatever.
But there is like some kind ofinroad
(19:21):
there are a few people that Iwent to high school with who
like either are doing things inthe public eye now or are
connected to other people alikeactually saw a video just
yesterday of one of my friendswho just sang on stage with
brandy Carlisle for like thesecond time one of the not and
unfortunately not somebody thatI really keep up with like super
(19:42):
regularly now it's like I justsaw it through Instagram but it
was like one of my buddies frommiddle school and high school
and you know, that is just likea trip that it's like that I
even know someone who has donethat plus it's like really
amazing for for him for thisperson. But like Um, that's
just, you know, it's just such ainteresting thing. Like, there's
(20:03):
somebody else that I know whohas gotten, like, done some
work, and the government hadbeen on MSNBC on it a couple of
times. And like, you know, it'sjust interesting how it's like,
at some point, you do start torealize the connections. And,
and yeah, it's like, I think,again, it's like, it's, it's
easy to, to see that if it'ssomebody who is like, who ends
(20:25):
up on the news, or who ends upon a YouTube video because they
like, you know, happen to beconnected to this concert when
this in that other instance,which is like really amazing for
them. But it's also like, well,we are really all connected.
Even without that, you know,public face, it's like, just
throughout our differentnetworks, and especially now, I
(20:47):
mean, I think the whole sixdegrees thing was, was even a
thing before the internet, andlike social media was
Vanessa (20:58):
so good. Remember that all the way back into high
school? That was like college?
Yeah,
Jess (21:02):
that was like definitely before, you know, but even now,
it's like, just any kind ofsocial connection with people,
you can definitely spiderweb outin such a way that that is quite
a trip. So I don't know, it's aninteresting thing to think
about. Nowadays,
Vanessa (21:21):
it might be more like five degrees of separation, I
mean, the world is getting quitea bit smaller. It is just wild,
like, even just a year onFacebook, you like to pop up
someone and you're like, oh, wehave 500 friends in common or
something, and I have no ideawho this person is. But then
you'll come across someone else,and you have no friends in
(21:42):
common you're like, it's almostweird to not have any friends in
common with someone when youhave a lot of friends. And I
don't know, social media isweird like that. It's both made
the worlds it's made the worldsmaller in both a good and a bad
way. In that, like, there's alot of good that comes from a
lot of relationships that comefrom it a lot of learning, a lot
of empowerment, but there's alsoa lot of hate that comes from it
(22:04):
too. So you know, us in thetrans community, or in Jenny's
case, transit Jason. You know,we get our share of death
threats and all sorts ofwonderful things because people
suck. But yeah, Shani, as soonas you tell, say,
Jenni (22:21):
I wish I could just want to isolate at this point. I
don't want to be connected topeople anymore.
I'm so tired. I am.
I don't really mean that I seepeople post things like, oh, you
know, I just want to go out andlive in the woods and forage
mushrooms and not being aroundpeople. And I get it. I mean, I
(22:43):
do, because I'm kind of thereright now, just because of some
goofy nonsense in my you know,in my own head in my own life.
And then, I mean, look at theworld Holy smokes. But, you
know, we haven't survived as aspecies that way. The reason
that we've we are where we are,is because of collaboration
because of community because of,and yeah, even sometimes, not
(23:05):
sometimes all the time. So thoseare exist in these pockets of
communities. And that's good andbad to write because some of
them can be really, reallynegative, and then they all feed
on each other. You know, I thinkeverybody's kind of got that.
Not everybody, I guess, butthere's that kind of evangelical
spirit to it, where it's like,go and spread the gospel of
whatever I believe in, or myagenda, or whatever it is. And
(23:28):
that's great, whenever it'ssomething positive, and it's not
great with something negative.
And I've just kind of beenstruggling especially in the
last maybe three days to kind ofjust just just deal with Max,
but I'm a little different thanthe people around me and the and
the immediate world around me.
And you're trying to pull in,you know, what's good, trying to
(23:52):
put out what's good instead ofthe other stuff, but I mean,
social media, y'all socialmedia, you know, but not a lot.
I am in a small town. It'sreally not that small but small
in Oklahoma, and we are actuallyputting on a pride fest. And I
(24:12):
mean, we it's a very smalllittle nonprofit, we've got to
go in here and we get a lot ofpushback. So anytime we try to
do a fundraiser you know,Somebody's knocking on
somebody's business Hey, youbetter not bring that here your
business to have a pizzafundraiser even I mean it's
really goofy. But we we manageit I free here we just plan
(24:33):
these great events. We had theBig Gay garage sale and it had a
it had a good turnout. I thinkit could have been better. So I
have some ideas for next year. Ilove that that you kind of learn
New York I now know what I willdo different next year. And and
we're just kind of playing someother fundraisers and doing some
fun stuff and pride fest isgoing to be really really cool.
(24:53):
It's not this Saturday, it isnext Saturday. I even took off
of work. Are this so you know, Icare? Yeah. Yeah. And yeah, I'm
just very, very excited aboutthat there's going to be a local
animal rescue there. And I'mprobably going to look, I know
(25:16):
they've got a little a couplelittle chihuahua mixes. Jess, I
know you don't know this, but welost a dog a puppy last week.
And when I tell you it wasabsolutely devastating. I mean,
I still I can, I can now kind ofsee some pictures of him and
kind of smile, but only forabout a second. And then it's
(25:37):
just it's back on. I mean, itwas just a devastating Vanessa
walked me through a bless you.
Thank you. It was a devastatingexperience. But then, you know,
I found out this little rescueis going to be at our pride
fest. And so I was they wereasking for some donations for
things. I was gathering somethings up and I looked on their
page just trying to figure outwhat else do they need? And
there's like two or three littlecheap hobbies.
Vanessa (26:00):
Dangerous.
Jenni (26:02):
Like, dammit, am I ready to be heard again? The only
thing is they're asking, youknow, can you foster first make
sure it's gonna get along withyour animals? Make sure you like
it and it is far. Bison. Well,are they spayed or neutered? And
she said no, but they will beand I was like, I don't I don't
know. I don't know if I can doit. Because I go and love this
(26:23):
animal. Jess, it was a tragicincident in which my dog was
under anesthesia for beingneutered. And his glucose
dropped very suddenly and theycould not save them. And so you
know, I have this. I have thisPTSD about it. Like I'm just I'm
not ready. I'm scared. I know.
That doesn't happen very often.
It's actually pretty rare. Butit's I'm so scared now that I'm
(26:47):
afraid to like love a dog andthen send it to get spayed or
neutered again, I'm afraid Iwon't even be able to.
I have to take like fiveBenadryl to get through the day.
Yeah, that's really, reallygood.
Jess (27:00):
I mean, yeah, losing an animal is always tough. But
losing a pet is always tough,but like, yeah, that's, um,
especially unexpected in a waylike that. Because that's such a
very, very routine, rightprocedure and the
Jenni (27:15):
safest place. You're gonna look at me is there at the
vet's office. And so, but Idon't mean to like, you know,
put a negative spin on any ofthis, you know, that is just
kind of part of the livingexperience is that things don't
live forever. And but I'm I'mjust, I'm big into opening my
heart. I'll take all the dogs. Iwant all the dogs. I'm gonna be
(27:38):
brokenhearted again. And allthat happen? What's gonna
happen? Because they're so cute.
Are you guys are so cute. has anarrow that does this. Stop it?
Yeah.
Vanessa (27:49):
Oh, yeah, you're getting a dog. You're getting a
dog. It's losing a pet is harderthan losing a person. Like when
I've lost like family members.
Like even when my dad killedhimself. I cried for like, maybe
five minutes. But when my lastdog died, I was inconsolable. My
best friend flew in from out oftown to make sure I didn't do
(28:10):
something stupid. My girlfriendat the time was there with me
the entire time. And then, twodays after she died, I got
Gabby, just because I knew Iwasn't going to survive without
some without a fluffernutter. Soit's hard. It's very hard.
Jenni (28:27):
Yeah.
Vanessa (28:28):
We'll make it. Yeah. So random questions since we were
talking about celebritiesearlier. If either of you ever
just run into a completelyrandom celebrity in the wild?
Yeah, Jenny's nodding.
Jenni (28:45):
Yeah, do either of you watch Wheel of Fortune? I'm
Vanessa (28:49):
not anymore. I know.
Pepsi Jack's a piece of shit,but Well, I met
Jenni (28:53):
Vanna White. Okay. And I don't know how she is now. I
believe that everybody has theopportunity to grow and change.
But at the time, she was abitch.
Jess (29:03):
So when you let that up, I knew where that was going.
Jenni (29:06):
I'm sure she's lovely.
Maybeit was a bad day. You know,
sometimes you just don't want todeal with people. So I'm sure
it's a little bit of a bit.
Whereyou found growing, waited on
Dave Matthews. Really? Yeah.
Well, Imean, there's been some really
random, goofy stuff and I can'tthink having anybody like super
major. I went to see WillieNelson last night, which was
(29:30):
super freaking cool.
Vanessa (29:34):
What's that?
Jenni (29:35):
Mean? First of all, the man is 91 me hear me that is the
number nine and one I can'tbelieve
Jess (29:41):
he's still up there
Jenni (29:43):
playing his guitar. And, you know, he doesn't really sing
quite as much. Now he does a lotof talking. And then he'll kind
of sing like the chorus, but itwas just precious. I was I was
watching the living legend. Andthis is, I'm sure his last tour.
Yeah, when I say that
Vanessa (30:03):
the power I mean, if there's any advertisement for
the power of marijuana, I
Jenni (30:09):
really I bought a shirt me smoking a joint. It's great.
There was a lot of marijuanaeverywhere I can imagine. Beer
was $50 for a six pack. Oh, wow.
I don't drink so I didn't haveto worry about it. But holy
smokes. Like that you pay howmuch
Vanessa (30:24):
for that? That's a lot.
That's way too much. Yeah,
Jenni (30:28):
I would have just brought my own in.
Vanessa (30:30):
There's ways. Yeah. Oh, exactly. There's ways I mean,
take your bag. There's waysYeah, I have a pocket between my
legs now. Just shove somethingup in there. Yeah. That's what
dilating is for. Right. Jess, Doyou have anybody that you've
come across? Well,
Jess (30:50):
I have a few. Like, I guess there's a couple. I mean,
I think I think the biggest nameones. There was a while that I
was actually it was when I wasliving here before in Asheville
and I was in. I was managing arestaurant, but it was when Oh,
gosh. I'm gonna have a hard timeremembering the name of the
(31:10):
movie. But it was a movie whereKristen Wiig Owen Wilson and
Zach Galifianakis were all inthis movie.
Vanessa (31:27):
Just in Waco was gonna.
Jess (31:31):
I mean, gonna get me that.
I don't know. I feel like I needto. But anyway, it was and it
was around. It probably was Ithink they must have been
filming it around 2015 2016Somewhere in there, but they
were all in town. And and ZachGalifianakis would just show up.
I worked at this burger joint,and he would just show up, like,
(31:55):
randomly by himself to eat aburger with like, kind of like
the hat and sunglasses like thewhole thing. And people would be
like, let's just leave himalone. You know, we like
wouldn't like the staff would betalking about it. But we
wouldn't tell any of thecustomers because we were trying
to be cool. But then there wasone night where we're Owen
Wilson, and I feel like I'm sosilly. But is it? Kristen Wiig
(32:16):
or Kristen Wiig, Kristen Wiig.
Or Kristen Wiig and Owen Wilsonwere, they showed up at this
there was like a nano breweryunderneath the place that I
managed. Teeny tiny place atotal hole on the wall, like you
had to go up an alley to get toa door and then you went down
(32:38):
these really dark stairs. It'slike this tiny room. But they
had they had like a differentversion of shuffleboard. than
I've ever they had these likebig long board games. And it was
kind of like shuffleboard. Butit was different. I don't
remember the name of the gameeither. I know this is not
doesn't not filling in enoughdetails for the story of anyway,
(33:00):
it was like this crazy unique,like weird shuffleboard game.
And it was like this total holein the wall place. Not like this
is a really busy town. But thereare there are like more
breweries than there areanything here. It's like total
beer city. So there are a bunchthat are like, open and have big
patios and like you could notlike hide out there. But this
place was like, the whole place.
You know? They were Yeah. And solike they showed up and like,
(33:26):
you know, it was like Monday orTuesday night, you know, like an
hour before close. And just allthe people from the restaurant.
Were down there because we hadjust finished our shifts or
whatever. And they went to playthe the shuffleboard knockoff
game and we were, we were justlike, Oh my God. You know, but,
you know, nobody would nobodywould approach him there anyway,
(33:46):
but like, that was the biggestcelebrity. I think the only kind
of celebrities that I've talkedto have been musicians because
when I was in my early 20s, Iworked at a jazz club. And some
pretty big names came throughthere. And so I like met them
and it was interesting to seelike who was nice and who was
(34:08):
not. Because some people werelike totally nice and some
people were total jerks and itwas really just a coin toss to
see like whether people weregoing to be nice or not. But
Thursday
Jenni (34:20):
is called mastermind masterminds
Jess (34:23):
okay, it's like a high is it like a heist film or
something? Or like a might behonestly I never watched it
obviously and I should becauseit's a
Vanessa (34:32):
good cast Kate McKinnon.
Jenni (34:34):
Yes, the robbing a bank vault and also what do you mean
when you were in your early 20sare saying You look like you're
still in your early 20s
Jess (34:42):
Oh yeah, you would think so. But that was like 20 years
ago.
Jenni (34:48):
I believe that. I refuse to believe that.
Vanessa (34:53):
The magic of hormones to it goes for both. It goes
both ways. When you take E or ifyou take t it takes years off
you So it's pretty fun. Yeah,
Jess (35:02):
I've, I've Yeah, I've been slowly moving from 15 year old
boy to 18 year old boy. So I'mgetting there. You're
Vanessa (35:09):
getting there. You're getting there. Maybe one day
you'll have a beard like what Iused to have. So you never know.
That'd be fun. Whenever theyheard of that hole in the wall,
there must be some.
Jess (35:20):
I don't know. I'm not sure. I don't know if it was
because like, I don't know, it'slike the burger place was a lot
more well known. But yeah, itwas it was like really like kind
of like the definitely one ofthe one of the lower key spots.
And so yeah, it's just a trip.
Vanessa (35:36):
My stories aren't as fun. My dad was friends with Jay
Leno. They went to high schooltogether. And they're both big
car guys so and Jay would callevery few months and like, I
usually answered the phone atwork and it's his his voice is
very, very high on the phone.
Like it's your kind of like whowhat, but there's this building
(35:58):
being torn down near us that hadlike this really cool like,
cream gantries some old thing.
And my dad called Jay about itbecause she has fun graduate he
has kind of a museum almost, andtold him about Jay bought it and
paid to have it shipped to him.
And I think he turned it intolike, the world's most
(36:21):
complicated pencil sharpener orsomething. But I think it's like
steam power. It's somethingcrazy. But I also bumped into
David Hasselhoff in London, ofall places. When my bestie Chris
and I were in London, we werejust walking out of the hotel.
And he was walking in thatfuckers tall. Holy shit. So it's
(36:44):
you do not expect to see thehearth when you're in London.
That's, you know, but that'sabout as most interesting
stories I have. I've met one ofthe guys that like, filmed the
Titanic wreckage, and that'sgoing to call. Yeah, I have a
picture from him. But yeah,nothing super interesting. Slept
(37:07):
with a member
Jenni (37:11):
of a band, but I've decided I'm not going to share
the band. Just
Vanessa (37:15):
want to do that on the podcast. I mean, if you tell me
personally, I won't tellanybody. I will absolutely tell
you personally. Okay, good.
Maybe when you and I aresleeping together. Okay. Okay.
You
Jenni (37:26):
want me to, like, call on his name or even shoot me? Like
in the midst of it. Just sayHey, real quick. Um,
Vanessa (37:34):
how do you want that to go down? If that's what you're
into? Like if I'm eating youout? Maybe?
Jenni (37:38):
Okay, okay. I can tell you then. Okay, cool. I guess
storytime at dinner? Yeah, Ithink okay, yeah. Purchase.
Vanessa (37:46):
I'm sorry. Jenny and I are very horny for each other.
Very specific. It is it is.
Yeah, she's she's seen myeverything. So. But yeah, you
know, long distance kind of, youknow, whatever. I hope to get
down to Oklahoma one of thesedays.
Jenni (38:07):
Long distance. Low commitment. Yeah,
Vanessa (38:10):
exactly. in it. I'm just learning about polyamory.
Because I'm starting to, I guessexplore it a little bit, because
there's someone here that I'minterested in. And there's you
that I'm interested in. Sothere's two people and I've
never really done that before.
But there's like a, there's aterm that I've heard from two
(38:32):
people to poly people. Becausethe person here is as well.
Satellites, were like, there'sthere's partners that just kind
of, they just kind of come inand out of your life, you know,
in timing, so I guess, maybe, Idon't know, will you be my
satellite?
Jenni (38:52):
I mean, I can I can I can go for this because I can't do.
There's no way I could do thatunder one roof. And I know
people do and I'm very happy forthem. That's awesome. It's not
my thing. I cannot. I reallyprefer a lot of alone time as it
is. So having a partner, myhusband works over the road. And
(39:13):
it's great. It's so great. And Ibless his heart. I know he
misses me. I know he missesbeing home. I know he doesn't
think it's great. But it'sreally it really works for me
because I don't manage otherpeople's like expectations well,
and so it's a lot to try to keepup with another person. I can't
imagine trying to keep up withmore than one person
Vanessa (39:33):
living with people.
It's hard. It's super hard. LikeI'm getting my own place and
like a month and a half and Ican't wait but I'm so excited
for you. Jess, are you livingwith someone kind of person or
do you prefer to be alone?
Jess (39:47):
Oh, I mean, I am married and under the same roof so I am
absolutely obligated to say no,I'm just kidding. No, I She's
definitely gonna listen to As tobut no, I, I've lived with a lot
of people before and not a lotof people before and it really
(40:08):
is hard. Living with people. Idefinitely think at this point
in my life, it's like, smalllittle nuclear family that I've
got or not is it nuclear withbeing so alternative? I'm not
sure. Anyway, whatever. There'sthree of us, me, the wife, the
kid, and that's like, that's it.
That's enough. You know, maybeoccasional visitors, but it's
(40:29):
like, it's enough with that, butI do really love alone time as
well, which is great. Andfiguring out how to build that
in with a young kid. Well, youknow, Vanessa, that's like a
challenge, but but it's youknow, it's getting there because
yeah, alone time is serious. Butsidenote, not polyamorous at
(40:49):
all. But I do love all thelanguage. Like satellites. And
what is it? polyglot? Well,wait, Polly cool. Now I'm trying
to remember how they killmolecule what's the what's the
spawn? The poly spawn? Is thatpolyglot?
Vanessa (41:08):
Okay, I know there's a
Jess (41:10):
term for there's a term.
term for polyamorous spawn. Ithink it may be polyglot. I'm
gonna look this up.
Vanessa (41:19):
We're gonna see oh, like kids from it? Yeah,
Jess (41:21):
yeah, that's what I mean.
Yes. That's cool. Yeah, yeah.
But I mean, there's, there's allsorts of, there's all sorts of
really great lingo. I wonder
Vanessa (41:31):
if there's like communal parenting then? Like,
everybody in the public, yourparents? Well,
Jess (41:35):
there's also that Yeah, I mean, that's yeah, co parenting,
which is different. Anotheralternative, which is really
amazing. Because it does, youknow, take a village and all I
would say like, some more peoplewilling to parent your kid, the
better as long as certainboundaries are understood. Yeah,
Vanessa (41:54):
you're on the same page about a number of things like,
education, stuff like that. So,yeah. Yeah, everything's so new.
But when you just when there'swhen you find like a partner
that you really click withliving with them. That's also an
absolutely amazing thing. So Ihaven't really, my relationships
(42:20):
in the past, I have my longestrelationship was probably my
son's mother. That was likethree years, but like I was
married, and it was probably fortwo years. And we were like,
together for maybe a year beforethat. But I don't think I'm very
fun to live with. I've been toldthat I'm not very fun to live
with. So I like to live alone,and then just kind of like,
(42:42):
mingling from there. So just meand my dog. So I think I think
everybody when I move out, Ithink it's going to be good for
everybody. So
Jenni (42:52):
I had a really cool poly kewl, I guess come in, I saw
homes, Jess, I specifically Isaw mobile homes. And we call
them manufactured home becausemobile home has a certain
connotation. She's a fancy dudeI've seen are they are so nice,
very, very nice homes. And thisthis group with Foley killed
(43:12):
came in and there was one homein particular that has an eight
foot shower, when I tell youthis is a massive shower, and
they were so excited, because itwas just gonna fit everybody.
And that was a I was I was gladthat I got the opportunity to
work with them. I do try to haveI don't have a lot of super, you
(43:36):
know, virtue signaling items inmy office. Because for the most
part, not only am I in a veryconservative state, but
generally the people whopurchase manufactured homes are
typically they lean a certainway. And you know, you got to I
sometimes I feel like such asellout because I'm like, Yeah,
(43:57):
I would normally have like, myphone opens or you know, just
something I just like to havesomething to identify with,
like, Hey, you're safe here. I'mgonna, I'm gonna treat you
respectfully whatever. And, youknow, but then you got to figure
I gotta get paid, man. Yeah,
Vanessa (44:11):
you have to do your job.
Jess (44:12):
I had a kid in college, so, but I do try to leave kind
of little
Jenni (44:18):
hints, if you will.
Vanessa (44:21):
If you saw someone out.
If you saw someone out, you cantell that they're clear then
like you can kind of grab on tothat. But ya know, I mean, when
it comes to like work, you don'thave to be your whole true self
at work. Sometimes you just needto go there and make your
fucking paycheck and leave. So
Jenni (44:41):
it can be difficult. I did have a fella pull up one
time with a confederate flag onhis truck. I immediately was
like, I'm not I'm not gonna takethat customer and the guy just I
don't want to deal with that.
Well, it turns out he had apoint with me. And you know when
I tell you, he turned out to bejust the nicest man Honey bought
a great home and he's his motherloved me, she made me all these
(45:03):
breads and homemade jams. And itkind of breaks your heart a
little bit. Because I'm like,you're such a good part. I mean,
you just, you're clearly adecent person. But you have this
thing about you that, does thatnegate everything. Sometimes I
wonder, you know, I hear thecliche, like, Oh, if he's, if
(45:25):
he's nice to you, but he's notnice to the waitress. He's not a
nice guy. And, you know, arethere things that like, it's
just like, No, you just, youcan't, no matter how great you
are, in so many ways, once wefind out this information, like
you're no longer great. It'salways such a weird little
balancing act. You know,everybody in my family, just
(45:46):
everybody in my family isconservative. It's me, and the
kids were the only ones that arenot everybody in my family would
vote for Trump a guy and givehim the chance? Well, probably
not my dad. I'm saying like,everybody is very, that's just
that. And so I love them. I knowthey have all these great
(46:08):
qualities as human beings. Ireally do love her, I love them.
They made me they couldn't bethat terrible. Cuz I think I'm
great. But he turned out to be areally nice guy with his
confederate flag on his truck.
It's,
Jess (46:25):
it's an interesting thing with that, like, I think it's,
um, like, you've got a like, Isee what you mean, about like,
is there a point where you'rejust gonna be like, No, I'm not
interacting or not. I mean,first of all, I totally agree
with Vanessa, like a job as ajob, you got to do what you got
to do. I mean, when I wouldwork, you know, worked in
(46:47):
restaurants for so long. It'slike, there was no, I mean,
everybody who comes in, youserve the public, you know,
their customer, like, it doesn'tmatter. But it is also like, it
is also interesting to see, kindof like the humanization on the
other end of, you know, a lot ofpeople who are more liberal, or
like, queer, or trans, or alliesor whatever, you know, like, I
(47:12):
wish you could just see thatwe're human, you know, but it's
actually like, it also goes theflip side to you know, because
it's like, even though somebodyhas a confederate flag and may
vote for Trump, and whatever itdoesn't. I think it's like, it
gets tricky, because it's like,okay, there are starting to be
(47:32):
more serious things, I think,with this political setup right
now, and the way that ourculture is, and it's so divided,
and it gets so heated, and theextremes are so much and it has,
it feels like it has least feelslike it has escalated in a way
that it was like, you know, evenif, I mean, I remember when I
(47:54):
was in college, I thought GeorgeBush was just like, Jr. was
like, the worst. You know what Imean? I was like so. So, you
know, like, I just thought hewas like the worst president we
would ever have, you know what Imean? It's like that. So, you
know, now
Jenni (48:14):
I look back, I like to go back and just have like, give me
a W again,
Jess (48:18):
I look back and I'm like, I would take another I would
take another GW like we couldyou know, if that's like, I
mean, I'm not It's not that Iwould like vote for, again, in
that instance, but I'm justsaying like, comparatively, it's
not like it didn't used to belike, quite as extreme. Even
though at the time I thoughtGeorge Bush was terrible, but I
didn't think he was, like goingto lead our country towards
(48:38):
fascism, or, you know, like,separate children and families,
you know, or, like, underminedemocracy and, you know, all of
these other things that justseem like the stakes are like so
high.
Vanessa (48:53):
He was at least presidential.
Jenni (48:55):
Yeah, yeah. I mean, he couldn't speak, you know,
coherent sentence hardly, but healways seemed like there was,
there was, there was a genuineperson in there,
Jess (49:06):
you know, once and remember, like, trying to figure
out if he was actually dumbingdown his language for his, for
his concern for the people thatwould vote for him. That's a
good point. Because that isanother thing that sometimes
happens to be a little bit more
Transcending Huma (49:29):
approachable, right, like, approachable,
approachable. Yeah.
Jess (49:32):
That, that, that maybe that that language, because
there was some analysis of like,his speeches and stuff. That
kind of started to suggestsomething like that, that I
remember looking at, but I mean,I just remember, you know, like,
just that being and the wholelike, 911 and all of the
aftermath of that and the warsand like being, you know,
(49:54):
because it was like, it isinteresting, because like, okay,
segue but like I've beenthinking about that a little bit
because that's what That's theword that I was protesting when
I was in college, you know,right, is that but, but anyway,
I do, I definitely get yourpoint about like, and around
here, you know, like, I live ina really in like a blue tiny,
tiny dot, you know, in a prettyred area, it gets read really
(50:18):
quickly around here. And soit's, it's interesting because
it's like, I don't actuallydisregard just anybody you know,
even if it's like we don't, youknow, it's like if they're going
to treat me respectfully thenlike, I will have a conversation
with them, it doesn't mean thatlike, we're going to be friends
and I'm gonna want to like belike, necessarily supporting
(50:39):
their business if they're not iftheir politics are really far
away. But it's like, I alsodon't have to, you know, it's
like, where do you draw thoselines? I think it gets it gets a
little difficult, but Idefinitely just feel like the
stakes do feel a lot higher. Nowwith that kind of calibration,
just because, you know, eventhough I think that a lot of
(50:59):
people with Confederate flagsmay not be that extreme, but
they're just flying that symbol.
Because, yeah, that's like, whatthey associate with more, even
though they may not berepresentative of like, the
super duper, divisive, violentrhetoric, you know, thing. Yeah.
And, but yeah,
Jenni (51:22):
I myself that, that, that wasn't something that he just
like, picked up one day andsaid, I'm gonna run with this
that was passed on to him that,I always try to remember that
people are just coming to thetable with their own pasts,
their own hurts their own hangups, their own very deeply held
beliefs. And sometimes they,they probably would be
different, if things had beendifferent.
Vanessa (51:44):
That's what I was gonna say, right? Because I mean, we
all I grew up in a veryconservative family, and I was
raised very conservative. And,you know, it took being educated
and going to a liberal school,to break me out of that. And I
think a lot of cases, it's, youknow, this guy with his
confederate flag. It's been,it's probably just all he's ever
(52:07):
known. It's just what he's beenaround his entire life, and he
hasn't really had exposure toother things. There's two kinds
of people, there's people thatare willing to learn and those
that are, so we just have towork with people that are
willing to learn. And like it.
As we've said, over and over onthis podcast, I refuse to
believe that all Republicanswant to see the trans community
(52:29):
dead.
Jenni (52:32):
I know enough of them, who are like, you know, they
pull the old, tired, I don'twant things shoved in my face,
you know, a lot of tiredarguments, because they they
don't have any of theirarguments aren't really
formulated other any otherarguments? So that's what they
have. And very much just, like,you know, you hear the old like,
(52:55):
well, you know, it's about, it'sabout being fiscal, it's about
money. And, you know, I mean, weall want to save money. Who
doesn't want to save money? Ihate my taxes. But you know,
Vanessa (53:11):
we just need to do away with the two party system. I
mean, who knows how long it'sgonna take for things to
actually get better? Not, notwhile we're around. But maybe
when Jen alpha takes over?
Jenni (53:24):
Well, my kids were just asked about that the other day,
they were like, Why don't wehave you know, we have to, you
know, but even they realizelike, that's just not where we
are. Right now. We are in we areat a critical point where you
can't you can't throw away yourvote.
Vanessa (53:39):
No, you can't.
Jenni (53:41):
Wait your vote.
Vanessa (53:42):
Yeah, I mean, I have an accent and like she is, I mean,
I told her I'm like, I can'targue with with you on it.
Because, you know, the wholegenocide going on in Palestine,
and Biden just sent anotherbillion dollars to Israel again
today. And they've been there'sbeen, it's been shown that the
(54:02):
US weapons are going to killhave been killing in a sense.
And it's like, in any otherelection. Fuck no, I wouldn't
vote for Biden. Because this ishorrible. Right? So we have
horrible and even more horribleand unfortunately, the even more
horrible is directly impactingme and my family, with cars with
(54:28):
all the Anna trans stuff and Iqueer and and I women and it's,
it's such a it's an impossiblesituation really, that I hate
that we're in. And because Idon't want to support Biden, I'm
voting for him, but I don'tsupport him. The only reason I'm
voting for him is because thealternative is possibly my own
(54:48):
genocide. And guess what's goingon in Palestine is horrible and
it tears me up, but I can't helpwith that. If I'm facing it
myself. And It's just so fuckedup. And I just,
Jess (55:04):
ah, it isn't. I mean, I think that, again, like social
media is like, right now, it'swhere news is happening so much.
And it's also like tricky,because, you know, I saw those
reports today about the billiondollars of weapons that, you
know, supposedly, like Biden hadjust approved or whatever. And
(55:27):
then a little bit later, I sawthat, that was actually
something that was already goingthrough Congress. That was like,
the timing of it was gettingsent over like that it was
already it was actually what hadpassed. And like, so he's just
passing it along, because theyfinally passed it. And like
(55:48):
that, but the timing of it, andthe way it's getting reported is
like, Oh, you just held up theweapons. But now you're sending
more, you know, it's like this.
And I'm not even saying, I'm noteven saying that to defend it.
Because I'm what I'm actuallybringing up is that the way that
information is presented, it'sreally hard to know what's true,
because I saw that and I waslike, I don't even have time to
look this up enough to figureout which story is true right
(56:11):
now. You know, but like, I hearboth of these, but I just also
think that like the way thatthings are being reported, it
gets really, really tricky. Tokeep our sense of what is really
happening. And like, thegenocide is terrible, and like,
hey, American imperialism hasalways been terrible. Back to
(56:33):
like, what I was actuallyprotesting in college, which was
American imperialism in theMiddle East. You know, because
we were invading Iraq, after wewere attacked by somebody from
Afghanistan. And that makes nological sense, because it didn't
make any sense. Because itwasn't about that, because it
was actually about, like, thecontrol of resources and
American imperialism. And like,you know, and it kind of, um, I
(56:54):
know someone who is like, fromthe Middle East, and in a group
discussion was they wereactually saying, it's, it's
interesting, because theyactually brought up the resource
thing. They were like, if you'relooking at it from the higher
level, and like, Yes, what'shappening is terrible. But like,
(57:15):
if you're looking at it, fromthe higher level of things, this
is still this part of the worldwhere people have really wanted
to control resources, andthere's just been this huge
fight between several differentfactions of, you know, Iran and,
and Israel and the US, and, youknow, Syria and Saudi Arabia,
(57:39):
and like, all these differentareas to try to control this
area. And again, I'm not sayingany of that to like, like,
America has, it's very muchguilty in that, like, 100%, of
like, of meddling in othercountries and other governments
and trying to have some kind ofcontrol in that way. And that
(58:00):
sucks, but it's like that, likethat still doesn't change the
fact that like, if you don'tvote for Biden, like, I kind of
still go back to that like,okay, so if you're not going to
vote for Biden, like, how doesthat actually help the people
that you're trying to help?
Exactly? No. And like, at thathigher level, like, it's
(58:22):
actually like, it's not it's notthat I'm so against Biden,
although I like it would begreat if we had a younger and
different and more progressivealternative, like 100% But like,
it's also the I don't see it asmuch as like, this is not Biden,
masterminding. This is like he'sdoing the American thing. Like
he's like, he's doing what he'shaving to do. And like, I think
(58:44):
that it's still way, way, waybetter than it would be if Trump
was in charge, because he would100% Just like, be like, hey,
Israel, like have whatever youwant, you know, what I'll send,
I'll send some folks overwhatever ever do you know, or
whatever he would do would be somuch worse for where the people
(59:06):
of Palestine so yes, genocide isterrible. And, you know, and
absolutely, like free Palestine.
And I think that people are sofocused on it, and they're so
focused on it being a black andwhite thing, you know, a yes or
no, it's like a binary thing.
That it's, it's it they losesight of, it's easy to lose
(59:30):
sight of the other factors. Youknow, it's easy to lose sight of
like, if you're prone if you'rerevoking a vote with protest.
What you know, what are you areyou like, oh, yeah, because the
world's burning, you know, andit's like, okay, well, fine.
Yes. And are you just gonna,like, throw gas on it or like,
(59:51):
exactly, ya know, like, andthere are like, terrible things
happening other places, and Ithink that we're so focused on
it. And what's happening inPalestine because it is the
scale of it has been so quick.
And it is such a it is such aterrible thing, that specific
really small land area with somany people. I mean, it's just
(01:00:11):
fucking terrible. And there arealso a lot of other things that
we really need to work on. Andit's just hard. It's hard to
hold all of that. Like it's sohard to hold all of that.
Jenni (01:00:24):
It is I had a I had a moment earlier and I just
thought I sometimes I just thinkI just don't belong here. Like
this just isn't I'm not supposedto I don't this isn't right.
I'm either either. I'm notsupposed to be here, or other
people aren't.
You know, because I do have sucha. I don't know everything. I'm
(01:00:45):
sorry. I have a cat.
Jess (01:00:46):
No, you're doing great. I love it. He
Jenni (01:00:49):
is He He's a pain. I love him though. His name is Spencer.
And here's his little tissuehole. And you know, I just have
such a tender heart. And for meit's like you were saying with
you know, genocide is justwrong. There's no there's
nothing you're going to there'sno context you're going to put
it in somebody I saw somebodysay recently. Well, I don't
understand why so many women andthe LGBTQ plus community are
(01:01:12):
supporting of Palestine becausethey don't like women are LGBT
plus. And I was like, genocideis wrong. Regardless. i It's not
conditional. It's just wrong.
And if we can say that it's okayto do because these people don't
do the things we like. We'regoing to really start twisting
things into well then the nextpeople who do what I don't like
(01:01:35):
then it's okay. It's just whatit has to be wrong. These
children have nothing to do withthe country, the parents the
religion, the system that theywere born into, and nothing to
do with that. And we hate butit's such a weird thing to think
we can't come together on thatgenocide is wrong. That seems
like such an easy square onething to agree on.
(01:01:59):
What a what a weird What a weirdworld. Okay, look at him. He
found a basket. Okay,
Vanessa (01:02:03):
that's amazing. If I fit so
Jess (01:02:06):
sets that's great.
Vanessa (01:02:09):
Okay, gang, we're up at time here. Either of you have
any final thoughts? I
Jess (01:02:14):
do. Because I looked up polyglot and I was so very
wrong. polyglot means you'reable to speak or write several
languages.
Vanessa (01:02:22):
Oh yeah, that's quite a bit.
Jess (01:02:25):
Maybe next time I will come back with the because I saw
this I saw something where itwas like a really cool name for
spawn from a polyamorous verycool. Anyway, I will come back
with some more randompolyamorous terms just to
entertain people the next timethat's that'll I'll give myself
(01:02:47):
that homework. But yeah, I justwanted to call myself out that I
was I was totally wrong aboutthat. That's not what that means
at all. Yeah, somebody waslistening and this was a great
other than that this was a greatI know we've we've had this
conversation has gone all sortsof places. And yeah, the show is
like got a little serious. Buthey, you know, that's what the
show is. And and yeah, everybodygo vote. That's it. Yes, we got
(01:03:12):
a while I'm gonna keep probablykeep saying that. I still think
you should vote. The way that Ithink you should vote, but like,
I still think people shouldvote.
Vanessa (01:03:21):
But the voting it's got you might not. Some people won't
show up to vote just becausethey're not into the
presidential election. Butthere's all the other elections,
all the local stuff, all thestates election
Jenni (01:03:32):
is your most important.
Exactly. If you want to votelocally, every single time
period. The thing is, they'regonna know I'm here. My vote
never counts in the winnerstally ever not here, not where I
live, but they are going to knowI'm here. Because if I don't
show up, they're just they thinkthey can do whatever they want.
(01:03:54):
Because I'm not gonna sayanything about it. And it
doesn't. It doesn't do much ifit's just me. No, no. Right. I
know who you would vote for.
Jess (01:04:08):
This cat is fantastic.
Vanessa (01:04:10):
It's really very cool.
That's pretty cute. Especiallywhen you're standing the camera.
Okay. He's a beautiful way.
Okay, you too. Thank you forbeing on tonight. Just always
wonderful to see you. Jenny. Ican't wait to be in between your
legs. And people are gonna belike, What the fuck Vanessa, you
(01:04:32):
were just suicide on now you'retalking about? It's, I'm on
hormones again. I found out thatmy hormone levels were very low
because my dosage. Myprescription had gotten changed.
And I was only taking onemilligram of estrogens of six
unknowingly, because myprescription is completely
different. And that was mydifferent medication. And I just
(01:04:55):
started ADHD meds too. So alittle bit more with it. Now
hormones are very important. Ifit's something that Taryn and I
talked about in the lastepisode, if you're feeling off,
get your hormones checked, youknow. And as you just never
know,
Jenni (01:05:09):
just it was such a pleasure to meet you.
Jess (01:05:11):
It was great to meet you, Jenny. And thanks for having me.
Yeah. Thanks for having me onVanessa and, and Jenny's cat.
Vanessa (01:05:19):
Jenny's cat. By Chinese kitty, thank you for watching
and listening to transcendinghumanity. Don't forget to send
us money, please money, send it.
Bye bye
The views and opinions of the hosts and guests on
(00:02):
transcending humanity are theirown and not those of the
respective employers. Thank youso much for listening to or
watching the show. Pleasesubscribe to our Patreon at
patreon.com/transcendinghumanity. We really appreciate
the support. Thank you.
Unknown (00:18):
Where's Doc? I'm sorry, who are you here to see Doc? Dr.
Andrew Bellamy. OBGYN is has aright there on the door. Well,
Dr. Bellamy's for the patientright now. Okay, well, I need to
see him now. Okay, young lady,please calm yourself down. Yes,
please. Oh, mind your ownbusiness Miss STD.
Okay, you know what? I will setup an appointment for you with
(00:40):
Dr. Belen. pagelets don't messwith me pitch
Doc nagarsol Good. Happy to meetyou. Look at me. Yes, please.
I am in the middle of anexamination here.
Would you tell Trish route Sallyin a wait a turn? Oh,
(01:02):
shut the hell up. Lady. Doc. Youdo not behave.
I will call security Angie. Thatwon't be necessary. Help me with
Ms. Goldfarb here. We're gonnamove you to another room. An
angel. What are you know?
Vanessa (01:17):
Angie won't be long.
Unknown (01:21):
Doc. I don't know what happened. Man. I woke up this
morning and I'm fucking broad.
There are a lot of psychologistsoffice in the building. Are you
sure you didn't walk into thewrong one
duck? You gotta believe me. Ifeel like I'm in this like this
nightmare. Like I just keepwaiting to wake up. Dude, it's
me.
It's Sam. Sam. Sam. Sam Wellman,your best friend.
(01:46):
Okay, very good. How much is hepaying? You
asked me something. asked meanything. Really? I get the
joke. Ya know, they asked mesomething about about Cynthia.
You know about Cynthia. Dude, Iknow everything about you your
boo boo. She's susuhe told you that. Oh, you
were nine years old. You showedit to Lauren Abramsky. She
(02:06):
kicked you in the knots. Youtold your mom you fell off the
swing. He told you that I wasthere. Dude. I practically
carried you home. Oh, seniorprom. Sandy O'Malley gave you
your second blow job under thebleachers. Your
first blow job March 1 1993 LisaKaminski in your basement your
mom came home. That prick didn'ttell you that prick. Oh DNA.
(02:32):
Miss please. Put down thescissors
doc DNA DNA. Get a DNA testdone.
Great. Please the scissorsbefore someone gets hurt. Yeah,
but Doc, you have the bloodfrom the paternity suit. We get
a DNA test done. Yeah.
Okay. Sure. Great. No, I'm gonnascissors and go home and get
some rest.
Okay, but you're gonna do you doit right away. As soon
(02:52):
as you leave it goes right tothe DNA office or whatever.
Okay? Yeah, sure. Great. You'regonna do it. Uh huh. Okay, just
relax. Go home. Okay, get somerest. All right. Fucking Sam
Jesus.
Vanessa (03:12):
All right. Hello, everybody. Welcome back to
transcending humanity. This isepisode 40. We have made it to
40 episodes, somehow. Just afriendly reminder, please
remember to rate us.
Subscribe to us. And, you know,support us on Patreon
patreon.com/transcending.
Humanity really helps. And youknow, it just really helps.
(03:35):
Today, I am joined by chess, aseverybody knows. And also my
girl, Jenny, who is areessentially random guests today.
I'm like, Hey, Jenny, do youwant to join? And she's like,
Yeah, sure. So Jenny runs apodcast called longterm pickles.
(03:56):
AndJenny Can you want to give that
a little plug really quick?
Jenni (04:04):
I would love to you and thank you longterm pickles as a
podcast for just like checkingout mentally and listening to
something hopefully that youknow, sometimes the topics are a
little heavier. We try not toget too heavy. We try to keep
them really light. But it's justa place to maybe come listen and
I don't know feel like you'rechatting with some besties about
some silly stuff. We, we laugh alot. We have a really good time.
(04:27):
Andcurrently, it's not. We don't
have anything new up because wegot in the middle of some
nonprofit work we were doing andthat really took precedence. So
for right now we are just we'regearing back up in June. Now
we're starting back up in June.
And we are going to have alittle more of a theme oriented
topics even though they'll stillbe pretty random. And in each
(04:50):
episode, we try a new pickle orpickle adjacent snack. So we've
had a lot of fun with that and
Vanessa (05:00):
Dad, I look forward to continuing I trans girls that
listen to the show, if you'restill in Spyro definitely listen
to that to get some picklerecommendations.
Jess, what's going on with you?
I think fine.
Jess (05:14):
I I'm happy to be back on the show. It's been about I
don't know, maybe a month ormore happy that we're back up
and going and you're,you know, feeling better?
Vanessa (05:29):
I'm not trying to.
Jess (05:31):
Yes. All around in, in all of in all the ways. That's
wonderful. So yeah, I mean, I'mhappy to be back what's been
going on ii have been really kind of just
like,I haven't been up to my normal
projects and stuff as much as Iusually am. I've been kind of
taking a, like I've been, well,I say that I've been doing like
(05:52):
house projects, and not like allmy online, you know, kind of
more activism advocacy stuff.
And it's been kind of, it's beengood to take a break, and kind
of regroup a little bit on that.
But I'm also like, starting tofeel the itch to get back to
some things. But yeah, I've beendoing very just kind of physical
like gardening and just tryingto be and setting things up for
(06:13):
the change of season and, andwhatever. Yeah, so it's, it's
kind of felt like a little bitboring. And like a really good
way.
Vanessa (06:26):
If we, those kinds of breaks, minute breaks are
important, especially whenyou're in advocacy. And because
you have to pour your heart andsoul into it. And it's fucking
draining, especially when youhave so much animosity being
pushed against you all the time,too. So it's nice to be able to
just get out and pull someweeds. Yeah, yeah, kind of put
(06:48):
it on. I've been doing the, youknow, spending less time on
social media and, and liketrying to do the balance of
staying informed and,
Jess (06:58):
you know, doing good for myself and my own mental health
and physical health and all ofthat. So, yeah. Good.
Vanessa (07:13):
Yeah, I believe my little clicking the button right
here that Oh, and for all myhacks and Copson, wheezes and
all that wonderful stuff. Soworking my vocal training here.
So this week, we are going to dosomething a little bit less, a
little bit lighter. Because lastweek was kind of heavy. If you
(07:34):
listened to that episode, it washeavy. Or I guess two weeks ago,
we do this every two weeks,totally.
My brain doesn't work. SoI thought we'd just share some
stories. Either be fun thingsgoing on, or just good fun,
whatever. And do to mind if Istart with mine, and then we go
(07:56):
to you. Okay, so part of thetrans experience. I don't know
if it's the same for NBS andtrans masks. But just did you
have like kind of a? Are youdrawn to gender Bender movie,
especially before you came out?
Jess (08:18):
I mean, I'm always drawn to like,
queer stuff. Yeah. You know,but, but I don't know. Yeah, I
mean, gender Benderspecifically.
But yeah, I mean, anythingqueer? I'm kind of open.
attached to? Yeah, yeah.
Vanessa (08:37):
I know, with trans friends a lot. And like,
body swap movies, like where,you know, boy, because girl,
girl becomes boy, whatever.
When our eggs are cracking,those kind of kinda jump out at
us. When my egg was cracking, Iwas watching
(15:08):
I'll be taking her on this. Sheactually, I made a little reel
earlier today and mentioned heron it. And she shared it. So I
asked her if she want to be ontonight, but she's out singing a
show. So unfortunately, shewon't be here, but maybe I guess
in the future. But yeah, that'sjust kind of my just random fun.
Like,how, I guess maybe it's just how
(15:29):
my brain works? I don't know, isit? Is it an autistic thing to
just like, grab on to somethinglike that? And like, be like, I
have to figure this out. But soyeah, I have a connection with
her going back like 27 years.
Who knows if I met her in thepast? I don't know.
But I just think it's kind ofcool. So I'm hoping to be able
(15:50):
to reconnect with her mom, too.
I reached out to her, but Ihaven't heard back. But it's
just, it's just kind of fun. Soyeah, that's my story. Small
World stuff. For sure. It reallyis. Yeah, it's definitely a
small world. So but it was Ibelieve it was like a media
(16:10):
class. So at the time, I was, Iwas raised as a good little
Republican boy. And and Hudsonwas a very conservative town,
and she was a very liberalteacher. And I was so
brainwashed by my father that atthe time, I just thought she was
(16:31):
like, she was a kook. But nowI'm like, she's my people. But
so it's just kind of wild, justthinking back on it, and how
people just kind of like, makeimpressions on us in one way or
another. And it just it lastthree years, like 27 years ago.
Like why do I remember this? Whyis Natalie space so like,
(16:56):
familiar to me? And some peoplejust really look like their
parents? I guess. So. Natalie,and check if you're watching
this, I think you and definitelycheck out Natalie. Look at her
work. Cem is just a fun movie.
Especially if you're trans it'sor if your egg is starting to
(17:18):
crack. It's just fun to watch.
The the romance in it hits theyhave pretty good chemistry.
There's a lot of plot holes.
Like how does this girl suddenlyhave all these clothes that fit
her out of absolutely nowhere,but yeah, so that's my story.
(17:38):
Who wants to share something funthat's going on with them?
Jess (17:45):
Awkward silence awkward silence just Oh, man. No, that's
a cool story. I think it's atrip How?
How like, there really is. Whatwas that game? It's like Six
Degrees of Kevin Bacon. Right?
I've heard of that. Yeah, right.
Yeah. Or it's like think thatone's supposed to be like
(18:08):
anybody in Hollywood isconnected to Kevin Bacon anybody
period I think anybody that'sreally the thing though, you
know is like it kind of ends upbeing that I don't have any
really, really cool it's funnylike like I mentioned before we
started recording you you knowtalked about the topic and I was
just like I got I got nothing Igot nothing but I have been
(18:32):
thinking though today about howit is just interesting how we
are all you know connected insome way and I guess a lot of
people think about it with like,you know, if there are any
celebrity connections or youknow people that you know who
are connected that way justbecause it's it's easier to say
like this is somebody who is notin my circle this like super
(18:53):
celebrity person who like livesin LA or New York or has like
five houses or like whatever.
But there is like some kind ofinroad
(19:21):
there are a few people that Iwent to high school with who
like either are doing things inthe public eye now or are
connected to other people alikeactually saw a video just
yesterday of one of my friendswho just sang on stage with
brandy Carlisle for like thesecond time one of the not and
unfortunately not somebody thatI really keep up with like super
(19:42):
regularly now it's like I justsaw it through Instagram but it
was like one of my buddies frommiddle school and high school
and you know, that is just likea trip that it's like that I
even know someone who has donethat plus it's like really
amazing for for him for thisperson. But like Um, that's
just, you know, it's just such ainteresting thing. Like, there's
(20:03):
somebody else that I know whohas gotten, like, done some
work, and the government hadbeen on MSNBC on it a couple of
times. And like, you know, it'sjust interesting how it's like,
at some point, you do start torealize the connections. And,
and yeah, it's like, I think,again, it's like, it's, it's
easy to, to see that if it'ssomebody who is like, who ends
(20:25):
up on the news, or who ends upon a YouTube video because they
like, you know, happen to beconnected to this concert when
this in that other instance,which is like really amazing for
them. But it's also like, well,we are really all connected.
Even without that, you know,public face, it's like, just
throughout our differentnetworks, and especially now, I
(20:47):
mean, I think the whole sixdegrees thing was, was even a
thing before the internet, andlike social media was
Vanessa (20:58):
so good. Remember that all the way back into high
school? That was like college?
Yeah,
Jess (21:02):
that was like definitely before, you know, but even now,
it's like, just any kind ofsocial connection with people,
you can definitely spiderweb outin such a way that that is quite
a trip. So I don't know, it's aninteresting thing to think
about. Nowadays,
Vanessa (21:21):
it might be more like five degrees of separation, I
mean, the world is getting quitea bit smaller. It is just wild,
like, even just a year onFacebook, you like to pop up
someone and you're like, oh, wehave 500 friends in common or
something, and I have no ideawho this person is. But then
you'll come across someone else,and you have no friends in
(21:42):
common you're like, it's almostweird to not have any friends in
common with someone when youhave a lot of friends. And I
don't know, social media isweird like that. It's both made
the worlds it's made the worldsmaller in both a good and a bad
way. In that, like, there's alot of good that comes from a
lot of relationships that comefrom it a lot of learning, a lot
of empowerment, but there's alsoa lot of hate that comes from it
(22:04):
too. So you know, us in thetrans community, or in Jenny's
case, transit Jason. You know,we get our share of death
threats and all sorts ofwonderful things because people
suck. But yeah, Shani, as soonas you tell, say,
Jenni (22:21):
I wish I could just want to isolate at this point. I
don't want to be connected topeople anymore.
I'm so tired. I am.
I don't really mean that I seepeople post things like, oh, you
know, I just want to go out andlive in the woods and forage
mushrooms and not being aroundpeople. And I get it. I mean, I
(22:43):
do, because I'm kind of thereright now, just because of some
goofy nonsense in my you know,in my own head in my own life.
And then, I mean, look at theworld Holy smokes. But, you
know, we haven't survived as aspecies that way. The reason
that we've we are where we are,is because of collaboration
because of community because of,and yeah, even sometimes, not
(23:05):
sometimes all the time. So thoseare exist in these pockets of
communities. And that's good andbad to write because some of
them can be really, reallynegative, and then they all feed
on each other. You know, I thinkeverybody's kind of got that.
Not everybody, I guess, butthere's that kind of evangelical
spirit to it, where it's like,go and spread the gospel of
whatever I believe in, or myagenda, or whatever it is. And
(23:28):
that's great, whenever it'ssomething positive, and it's not
great with something negative.
And I've just kind of beenstruggling especially in the
last maybe three days to kind ofjust just just deal with Max,
but I'm a little different thanthe people around me and the and
the immediate world around me.
And you're trying to pull in,you know, what's good, trying to
(23:52):
put out what's good instead ofthe other stuff, but I mean,
social media, y'all socialmedia, you know, but not a lot.
I am in a small town. It'sreally not that small but small
in Oklahoma, and we are actuallyputting on a pride fest. And I
(24:12):
mean, we it's a very smalllittle nonprofit, we've got to
go in here and we get a lot ofpushback. So anytime we try to
do a fundraiser you know,Somebody's knocking on
somebody's business Hey, youbetter not bring that here your
business to have a pizzafundraiser even I mean it's
really goofy. But we we manageit I free here we just plan
(24:33):
these great events. We had theBig Gay garage sale and it had a
it had a good turnout. I thinkit could have been better. So I
have some ideas for next year. Ilove that that you kind of learn
New York I now know what I willdo different next year. And and
we're just kind of playing someother fundraisers and doing some
fun stuff and pride fest isgoing to be really really cool.
(24:53):
It's not this Saturday, it isnext Saturday. I even took off
of work. Are this so you know, Icare? Yeah. Yeah. And yeah, I'm
just very, very excited aboutthat there's going to be a local
animal rescue there. And I'mprobably going to look, I know
(25:16):
they've got a little a couplelittle chihuahua mixes. Jess, I
know you don't know this, but welost a dog a puppy last week.
And when I tell you it wasabsolutely devastating. I mean,
I still I can, I can now kind ofsee some pictures of him and
kind of smile, but only forabout a second. And then it's
(25:37):
just it's back on. I mean, itwas just a devastating Vanessa
walked me through a bless you.
Thank you. It was a devastatingexperience. But then, you know,
I found out this little rescueis going to be at our pride
fest. And so I was they wereasking for some donations for
things. I was gathering somethings up and I looked on their
page just trying to figure outwhat else do they need? And
there's like two or three littlecheap hobbies.
Vanessa (26:00):
Dangerous.
Jenni (26:02):
Like, dammit, am I ready to be heard again? The only
thing is they're asking, youknow, can you foster first make
sure it's gonna get along withyour animals? Make sure you like
it and it is far. Bison. Well,are they spayed or neutered? And
she said no, but they will beand I was like, I don't I don't
know. I don't know if I can doit. Because I go and love this
(26:23):
animal. Jess, it was a tragicincident in which my dog was
under anesthesia for beingneutered. And his glucose
dropped very suddenly and theycould not save them. And so you
know, I have this. I have thisPTSD about it. Like I'm just I'm
not ready. I'm scared. I know.
That doesn't happen very often.
It's actually pretty rare. Butit's I'm so scared now that I'm
(26:47):
afraid to like love a dog andthen send it to get spayed or
neutered again, I'm afraid Iwon't even be able to.
I have to take like fiveBenadryl to get through the day.
Yeah, that's really, reallygood.
Jess (27:00):
I mean, yeah, losing an animal is always tough. But
losing a pet is always tough,but like, yeah, that's, um,
especially unexpected in a waylike that. Because that's such a
very, very routine, rightprocedure and the
Jenni (27:15):
safest place. You're gonna look at me is there at the
vet's office. And so, but Idon't mean to like, you know,
put a negative spin on any ofthis, you know, that is just
kind of part of the livingexperience is that things don't
live forever. And but I'm I'mjust, I'm big into opening my
heart. I'll take all the dogs. Iwant all the dogs. I'm gonna be
(27:38):
brokenhearted again. And allthat happen? What's gonna
happen? Because they're so cute.
Are you guys are so cute. has anarrow that does this. Stop it?
Yeah.
Vanessa (27:49):
Oh, yeah, you're getting a dog. You're getting a
dog. It's losing a pet is harderthan losing a person. Like when
I've lost like family members.
Like even when my dad killedhimself. I cried for like, maybe
five minutes. But when my lastdog died, I was inconsolable. My
best friend flew in from out oftown to make sure I didn't do
(28:10):
something stupid. My girlfriendat the time was there with me
the entire time. And then, twodays after she died, I got
Gabby, just because I knew Iwasn't going to survive without
some without a fluffernutter. Soit's hard. It's very hard.
Jenni (28:27):
Yeah.
Vanessa (28:28):
We'll make it. Yeah. So random questions since we were
talking about celebritiesearlier. If either of you ever
just run into a completelyrandom celebrity in the wild?
Yeah, Jenny's nodding.
Jenni (28:45):
Yeah, do either of you watch Wheel of Fortune? I'm
Vanessa (28:49):
not anymore. I know.
Pepsi Jack's a piece of shit,but Well, I met
Jenni (28:53):
Vanna White. Okay. And I don't know how she is now. I
believe that everybody has theopportunity to grow and change.
But at the time, she was abitch.
Jess (29:03):
So when you let that up, I knew where that was going.
Jenni (29:06):
I'm sure she's lovely.
Maybeit was a bad day. You know,
sometimes you just don't want todeal with people. So I'm sure
it's a little bit of a bit.
Whereyou found growing, waited on
Dave Matthews. Really? Yeah.
Well, Imean, there's been some really
random, goofy stuff and I can'tthink having anybody like super
major. I went to see WillieNelson last night, which was
(29:30):
super freaking cool.
Vanessa (29:34):
What's that?
Jenni (29:35):
Mean? First of all, the man is 91 me hear me that is the
number nine and one I can'tbelieve
Jess (29:41):
he's still up there
Jenni (29:43):
playing his guitar. And, you know, he doesn't really sing
quite as much. Now he does a lotof talking. And then he'll kind
of sing like the chorus, but itwas just precious. I was I was
watching the living legend. Andthis is, I'm sure his last tour.
Yeah, when I say that
Vanessa (30:03):
the power I mean, if there's any advertisement for
the power of marijuana, I
Jenni (30:09):
really I bought a shirt me smoking a joint. It's great.
There was a lot of marijuanaeverywhere I can imagine. Beer
was $50 for a six pack. Oh, wow.
I don't drink so I didn't haveto worry about it. But holy
smokes. Like that you pay howmuch
Vanessa (30:24):
for that? That's a lot.
That's way too much. Yeah,
Jenni (30:28):
I would have just brought my own in.
Vanessa (30:30):
There's ways. Yeah. Oh, exactly. There's ways I mean,
take your bag. There's waysYeah, I have a pocket between my
legs now. Just shove somethingup in there. Yeah. That's what
dilating is for. Right. Jess, Doyou have anybody that you've
come across? Well,
Jess (30:50):
I have a few. Like, I guess there's a couple. I mean,
I think I think the biggest nameones. There was a while that I
was actually it was when I wasliving here before in Asheville
and I was in. I was managing arestaurant, but it was when Oh,
gosh. I'm gonna have a hard timeremembering the name of the
(31:10):
movie. But it was a movie whereKristen Wiig Owen Wilson and
Zach Galifianakis were all inthis movie.
Vanessa (31:27):
Just in Waco was gonna.
Jess (31:31):
I mean, gonna get me that.
I don't know. I feel like I needto. But anyway, it was and it
was around. It probably was Ithink they must have been
filming it around 2015 2016Somewhere in there, but they
were all in town. And and ZachGalifianakis would just show up.
I worked at this burger joint,and he would just show up, like,
(31:55):
randomly by himself to eat aburger with like, kind of like
the hat and sunglasses like thewhole thing. And people would be
like, let's just leave himalone. You know, we like
wouldn't like the staff would betalking about it. But we
wouldn't tell any of thecustomers because we were trying
to be cool. But then there wasone night where we're Owen
Wilson, and I feel like I'm sosilly. But is it? Kristen Wiig
(32:16):
or Kristen Wiig, Kristen Wiig.
Or Kristen Wiig and Owen Wilsonwere, they showed up at this
there was like a nano breweryunderneath the place that I
managed. Teeny tiny place atotal hole on the wall, like you
had to go up an alley to get toa door and then you went down
(32:38):
these really dark stairs. It'slike this tiny room. But they
had they had like a differentversion of shuffleboard. than
I've ever they had these likebig long board games. And it was
kind of like shuffleboard. Butit was different. I don't
remember the name of the gameeither. I know this is not
doesn't not filling in enoughdetails for the story of anyway,
(33:00):
it was like this crazy unique,like weird shuffleboard game.
And it was like this total holein the wall place. Not like this
is a really busy town. But thereare there are like more
breweries than there areanything here. It's like total
beer city. So there are a bunchthat are like, open and have big
patios and like you could notlike hide out there. But this
place was like, the whole place.
You know? They were Yeah. And solike they showed up and like,
(33:26):
you know, it was like Monday orTuesday night, you know, like an
hour before close. And just allthe people from the restaurant.
Were down there because we hadjust finished our shifts or
whatever. And they went to playthe the shuffleboard knockoff
game and we were, we were justlike, Oh my God. You know, but,
you know, nobody would nobodywould approach him there anyway,
(33:46):
but like, that was the biggestcelebrity. I think the only kind
of celebrities that I've talkedto have been musicians because
when I was in my early 20s, Iworked at a jazz club. And some
pretty big names came throughthere. And so I like met them
and it was interesting to seelike who was nice and who was
(34:08):
not. Because some people werelike totally nice and some
people were total jerks and itwas really just a coin toss to
see like whether people weregoing to be nice or not. But
Thursday
Jenni (34:20):
is called mastermind masterminds
Jess (34:23):
okay, it's like a high is it like a heist film or
something? Or like a might behonestly I never watched it
obviously and I should becauseit's a
Vanessa (34:32):
good cast Kate McKinnon.
Jenni (34:34):
Yes, the robbing a bank vault and also what do you mean
when you were in your early 20sare saying You look like you're
still in your early 20s
Jess (34:42):
Oh yeah, you would think so. But that was like 20 years
ago.
Jenni (34:48):
I believe that. I refuse to believe that.
Vanessa (34:53):
The magic of hormones to it goes for both. It goes
both ways. When you take E or ifyou take t it takes years off
you So it's pretty fun. Yeah,
Jess (35:02):
I've, I've Yeah, I've been slowly moving from 15 year old
boy to 18 year old boy. So I'mgetting there. You're
Vanessa (35:09):
getting there. You're getting there. Maybe one day
you'll have a beard like what Iused to have. So you never know.
That'd be fun. Whenever theyheard of that hole in the wall,
there must be some.
Jess (35:20):
I don't know. I'm not sure. I don't know if it was
because like, I don't know, it'slike the burger place was a lot
more well known. But yeah, itwas it was like really like kind
of like the definitely one ofthe one of the lower key spots.
And so yeah, it's just a trip.
Vanessa (35:36):
My stories aren't as fun. My dad was friends with Jay
Leno. They went to high schooltogether. And they're both big
car guys so and Jay would callevery few months and like, I
usually answered the phone atwork and it's his his voice is
very, very high on the phone.
Like it's your kind of like whowhat, but there's this building
(35:58):
being torn down near us that hadlike this really cool like,
cream gantries some old thing.
And my dad called Jay about itbecause she has fun graduate he
has kind of a museum almost, andtold him about Jay bought it and
paid to have it shipped to him.
And I think he turned it intolike, the world's most
(36:21):
complicated pencil sharpener orsomething. But I think it's like
steam power. It's somethingcrazy. But I also bumped into
David Hasselhoff in London, ofall places. When my bestie Chris
and I were in London, we werejust walking out of the hotel.
And he was walking in thatfuckers tall. Holy shit. So it's
(36:44):
you do not expect to see thehearth when you're in London.
That's, you know, but that'sabout as most interesting
stories I have. I've met one ofthe guys that like, filmed the
Titanic wreckage, and that'sgoing to call. Yeah, I have a
picture from him. But yeah,nothing super interesting. Slept
(37:07):
with a member
Jenni (37:11):
of a band, but I've decided I'm not going to share
the band. Just
Vanessa (37:15):
want to do that on the podcast. I mean, if you tell me
personally, I won't tellanybody. I will absolutely tell
you personally. Okay, good.
Maybe when you and I aresleeping together. Okay. Okay.
You
Jenni (37:26):
want me to, like, call on his name or even shoot me? Like
in the midst of it. Just sayHey, real quick. Um,
Vanessa (37:34):
how do you want that to go down? If that's what you're
into? Like if I'm eating youout? Maybe?
Jenni (37:38):
Okay, okay. I can tell you then. Okay, cool. I guess
storytime at dinner? Yeah, Ithink okay, yeah. Purchase.
Vanessa (37:46):
I'm sorry. Jenny and I are very horny for each other.
Very specific. It is it is.
Yeah, she's she's seen myeverything. So. But yeah, you
know, long distance kind of, youknow, whatever. I hope to get
down to Oklahoma one of thesedays.
Jenni (38:07):
Long distance. Low commitment. Yeah,
Vanessa (38:10):
exactly. in it. I'm just learning about polyamory.
Because I'm starting to, I guessexplore it a little bit, because
there's someone here that I'minterested in. And there's you
that I'm interested in. Sothere's two people and I've
never really done that before.
But there's like a, there's aterm that I've heard from two
(38:32):
people to poly people. Becausethe person here is as well.
Satellites, were like, there'sthere's partners that just kind
of, they just kind of come inand out of your life, you know,
in timing, so I guess, maybe, Idon't know, will you be my
satellite?
Jenni (38:52):
I mean, I can I can I can go for this because I can't do.
There's no way I could do thatunder one roof. And I know
people do and I'm very happy forthem. That's awesome. It's not
my thing. I cannot. I reallyprefer a lot of alone time as it
is. So having a partner, myhusband works over the road. And
(39:13):
it's great. It's so great. And Ibless his heart. I know he
misses me. I know he missesbeing home. I know he doesn't
think it's great. But it'sreally it really works for me
because I don't manage otherpeople's like expectations well,
and so it's a lot to try to keepup with another person. I can't
imagine trying to keep up withmore than one person
Vanessa (39:33):
living with people.
It's hard. It's super hard. LikeI'm getting my own place and
like a month and a half and Ican't wait but I'm so excited
for you. Jess, are you livingwith someone kind of person or
do you prefer to be alone?
Jess (39:47):
Oh, I mean, I am married and under the same roof so I am
absolutely obligated to say no,I'm just kidding. No, I She's
definitely gonna listen to As tobut no, I, I've lived with a lot
of people before and not a lotof people before and it really
(40:08):
is hard. Living with people. Idefinitely think at this point
in my life, it's like, smalllittle nuclear family that I've
got or not is it nuclear withbeing so alternative? I'm not
sure. Anyway, whatever. There'sthree of us, me, the wife, the
kid, and that's like, that's it.
That's enough. You know, maybeoccasional visitors, but it's
(40:29):
like, it's enough with that, butI do really love alone time as
well, which is great. Andfiguring out how to build that
in with a young kid. Well, youknow, Vanessa, that's like a
challenge, but but it's youknow, it's getting there because
yeah, alone time is serious. Butsidenote, not polyamorous at
(40:49):
all. But I do love all thelanguage. Like satellites. And
what is it? polyglot? Well,wait, Polly cool. Now I'm trying
to remember how they killmolecule what's the what's the
spawn? The poly spawn? Is thatpolyglot?
Vanessa (41:08):
Okay, I know there's a
Jess (41:10):
term for there's a term.
term for polyamorous spawn. Ithink it may be polyglot. I'm
gonna look this up.
Vanessa (41:19):
We're gonna see oh, like kids from it? Yeah,
Jess (41:21):
yeah, that's what I mean.
Yes. That's cool. Yeah, yeah.
But I mean, there's, there's allsorts of, there's all sorts of
really great lingo. I wonder
Vanessa (41:31):
if there's like communal parenting then? Like,
everybody in the public, yourparents? Well,
Jess (41:35):
there's also that Yeah, I mean, that's yeah, co parenting,
which is different. Anotheralternative, which is really
amazing. Because it does, youknow, take a village and all I
would say like, some more peoplewilling to parent your kid, the
better as long as certainboundaries are understood. Yeah,
Vanessa (41:54):
you're on the same page about a number of things like,
education, stuff like that. So,yeah. Yeah, everything's so new.
But when you just when there'swhen you find like a partner
that you really click withliving with them. That's also an
absolutely amazing thing. So Ihaven't really, my relationships
(42:20):
in the past, I have my longestrelationship was probably my
son's mother. That was likethree years, but like I was
married, and it was probably fortwo years. And we were like,
together for maybe a year beforethat. But I don't think I'm very
fun to live with. I've been toldthat I'm not very fun to live
with. So I like to live alone,and then just kind of like,
(42:42):
mingling from there. So just meand my dog. So I think I think
everybody when I move out, Ithink it's going to be good for
everybody. So
Jenni (42:52):
I had a really cool poly kewl, I guess come in, I saw
homes, Jess, I specifically Isaw mobile homes. And we call
them manufactured home becausemobile home has a certain
connotation. She's a fancy dudeI've seen are they are so nice,
very, very nice homes. And thisthis group with Foley killed
(43:12):
came in and there was one homein particular that has an eight
foot shower, when I tell youthis is a massive shower, and
they were so excited, because itwas just gonna fit everybody.
And that was a I was I was gladthat I got the opportunity to
work with them. I do try to haveI don't have a lot of super, you
(43:36):
know, virtue signaling items inmy office. Because for the most
part, not only am I in a veryconservative state, but
generally the people whopurchase manufactured homes are
typically they lean a certainway. And you know, you got to I
sometimes I feel like such asellout because I'm like, Yeah,
(43:57):
I would normally have like, myphone opens or you know, just
something I just like to havesomething to identify with,
like, Hey, you're safe here. I'mgonna, I'm gonna treat you
respectfully whatever. And, youknow, but then you got to figure
I gotta get paid, man. Yeah,
Vanessa (44:11):
you have to do your job.
Jess (44:12):
I had a kid in college, so, but I do try to leave kind
of little
Jenni (44:18):
hints, if you will.
Vanessa (44:21):
If you saw someone out.
If you saw someone out, you cantell that they're clear then
like you can kind of grab on tothat. But ya know, I mean, when
it comes to like work, you don'thave to be your whole true self
at work. Sometimes you just needto go there and make your
fucking paycheck and leave. So
Jenni (44:41):
it can be difficult. I did have a fella pull up one
time with a confederate flag onhis truck. I immediately was
like, I'm not I'm not gonna takethat customer and the guy just I
don't want to deal with that.
Well, it turns out he had apoint with me. And you know when
I tell you, he turned out to bejust the nicest man Honey bought
a great home and he's his motherloved me, she made me all these
(45:03):
breads and homemade jams. And itkind of breaks your heart a
little bit. Because I'm like,you're such a good part. I mean,
you just, you're clearly adecent person. But you have this
thing about you that, does thatnegate everything. Sometimes I
wonder, you know, I hear thecliche, like, Oh, if he's, if
(45:25):
he's nice to you, but he's notnice to the waitress. He's not a
nice guy. And, you know, arethere things that like, it's
just like, No, you just, youcan't, no matter how great you
are, in so many ways, once wefind out this information, like
you're no longer great. It'salways such a weird little
balancing act. You know,everybody in my family, just
(45:46):
everybody in my family isconservative. It's me, and the
kids were the only ones that arenot everybody in my family would
vote for Trump a guy and givehim the chance? Well, probably
not my dad. I'm saying like,everybody is very, that's just
that. And so I love them. I knowthey have all these great
(46:08):
qualities as human beings. Ireally do love her, I love them.
They made me they couldn't bethat terrible. Cuz I think I'm
great. But he turned out to be areally nice guy with his
confederate flag on his truck.
It's,
Jess (46:25):
it's an interesting thing with that, like, I think it's,
um, like, you've got a like, Isee what you mean, about like,
is there a point where you'rejust gonna be like, No, I'm not
interacting or not. I mean,first of all, I totally agree
with Vanessa, like a job as ajob, you got to do what you got
to do. I mean, when I wouldwork, you know, worked in
(46:47):
restaurants for so long. It'slike, there was no, I mean,
everybody who comes in, youserve the public, you know,
their customer, like, it doesn'tmatter. But it is also like, it
is also interesting to see, kindof like the humanization on the
other end of, you know, a lot ofpeople who are more liberal, or
like, queer, or trans, or alliesor whatever, you know, like, I
(47:12):
wish you could just see thatwe're human, you know, but it's
actually like, it also goes theflip side to you know, because
it's like, even though somebodyhas a confederate flag and may
vote for Trump, and whatever itdoesn't. I think it's like, it
gets tricky, because it's like,okay, there are starting to be
(47:32):
more serious things, I think,with this political setup right
now, and the way that ourculture is, and it's so divided,
and it gets so heated, and theextremes are so much and it has,
it feels like it has least feelslike it has escalated in a way
that it was like, you know, evenif, I mean, I remember when I
(47:54):
was in college, I thought GeorgeBush was just like, Jr. was
like, the worst. You know what Imean? I was like so. So, you
know, like, I just thought hewas like the worst president we
would ever have, you know what Imean? It's like that. So, you
know, now
Jenni (48:14):
I look back, I like to go back and just have like, give me
a W again,
Jess (48:18):
I look back and I'm like, I would take another I would
take another GW like we couldyou know, if that's like, I
mean, I'm not It's not that Iwould like vote for, again, in
that instance, but I'm justsaying like, comparatively, it's
not like it didn't used to belike, quite as extreme. Even
though at the time I thoughtGeorge Bush was terrible, but I
didn't think he was, like goingto lead our country towards
(48:38):
fascism, or, you know, like,separate children and families,
you know, or, like, underminedemocracy and, you know, all of
these other things that justseem like the stakes are like so
high.
Vanessa (48:53):
He was at least presidential.
Jenni (48:55):
Yeah, yeah. I mean, he couldn't speak, you know,
coherent sentence hardly, but healways seemed like there was,
there was, there was a genuineperson in there,
Jess (49:06):
you know, once and remember, like, trying to figure
out if he was actually dumbingdown his language for his, for
his concern for the people thatwould vote for him. That's a
good point. Because that isanother thing that sometimes
happens to be a little bit more
Transcending Huma (49:29):
approachable, right, like, approachable,
approachable. Yeah.
Jess (49:32):
That, that, that maybe that that language, because
there was some analysis of like,his speeches and stuff. That
kind of started to suggestsomething like that, that I
remember looking at, but I mean,I just remember, you know, like,
just that being and the wholelike, 911 and all of the
aftermath of that and the warsand like being, you know,
(49:54):
because it was like, it isinteresting, because like, okay,
segue but like I've beenthinking about that a little bit
because that's what That's theword that I was protesting when
I was in college, you know,right, is that but, but anyway,
I do, I definitely get yourpoint about like, and around
here, you know, like, I live ina really in like a blue tiny,
tiny dot, you know, in a prettyred area, it gets read really
(50:18):
quickly around here. And soit's, it's interesting because
it's like, I don't actuallydisregard just anybody you know,
even if it's like we don't, youknow, it's like if they're going
to treat me respectfully thenlike, I will have a conversation
with them, it doesn't mean thatlike, we're going to be friends
and I'm gonna want to like belike, necessarily supporting
(50:39):
their business if they're not iftheir politics are really far
away. But it's like, I alsodon't have to, you know, it's
like, where do you draw thoselines? I think it gets it gets a
little difficult, but Idefinitely just feel like the
stakes do feel a lot higher. Nowwith that kind of calibration,
just because, you know, eventhough I think that a lot of
(50:59):
people with Confederate flagsmay not be that extreme, but
they're just flying that symbol.
Because, yeah, that's like, whatthey associate with more, even
though they may not berepresentative of like, the
super duper, divisive, violentrhetoric, you know, thing. Yeah.
And, but yeah,
Jenni (51:22):
I myself that, that, that wasn't something that he just
like, picked up one day andsaid, I'm gonna run with this
that was passed on to him that,I always try to remember that
people are just coming to thetable with their own pasts,
their own hurts their own hangups, their own very deeply held
beliefs. And sometimes they,they probably would be
different, if things had beendifferent.
Vanessa (51:44):
That's what I was gonna say, right? Because I mean, we
all I grew up in a veryconservative family, and I was
raised very conservative. And,you know, it took being educated
and going to a liberal school,to break me out of that. And I
think a lot of cases, it's, youknow, this guy with his
confederate flag. It's been,it's probably just all he's ever
(52:07):
known. It's just what he's beenaround his entire life, and he
hasn't really had exposure toother things. There's two kinds
of people, there's people thatare willing to learn and those
that are, so we just have towork with people that are
willing to learn. And like it.
As we've said, over and over onthis podcast, I refuse to
believe that all Republicanswant to see the trans community
(52:29):
dead.
Jenni (52:32):
I know enough of them, who are like, you know, they
pull the old, tired, I don'twant things shoved in my face,
you know, a lot of tiredarguments, because they they
don't have any of theirarguments aren't really
formulated other any otherarguments? So that's what they
have. And very much just, like,you know, you hear the old like,
(52:55):
well, you know, it's about, it'sabout being fiscal, it's about
money. And, you know, I mean, weall want to save money. Who
doesn't want to save money? Ihate my taxes. But you know,
Vanessa (53:11):
we just need to do away with the two party system. I
mean, who knows how long it'sgonna take for things to
actually get better? Not, notwhile we're around. But maybe
when Jen alpha takes over?
Jenni (53:24):
Well, my kids were just asked about that the other day,
they were like, Why don't wehave you know, we have to, you
know, but even they realizelike, that's just not where we
are. Right now. We are in we areat a critical point where you
can't you can't throw away yourvote.
Vanessa (53:39):
No, you can't.
Jenni (53:41):
Wait your vote.
Vanessa (53:42):
Yeah, I mean, I have an accent and like she is, I mean,
I told her I'm like, I can'targue with with you on it.
Because, you know, the wholegenocide going on in Palestine,
and Biden just sent anotherbillion dollars to Israel again
today. And they've been there'sbeen, it's been shown that the
(54:02):
US weapons are going to killhave been killing in a sense.
And it's like, in any otherelection. Fuck no, I wouldn't
vote for Biden. Because this ishorrible. Right? So we have
horrible and even more horribleand unfortunately, the even more
horrible is directly impactingme and my family, with cars with
(54:28):
all the Anna trans stuff and Iqueer and and I women and it's,
it's such a it's an impossiblesituation really, that I hate
that we're in. And because Idon't want to support Biden, I'm
voting for him, but I don'tsupport him. The only reason I'm
voting for him is because thealternative is possibly my own
(54:48):
genocide. And guess what's goingon in Palestine is horrible and
it tears me up, but I can't helpwith that. If I'm facing it
myself. And It's just so fuckedup. And I just,
Jess (55:04):
ah, it isn't. I mean, I think that, again, like social
media is like, right now, it'swhere news is happening so much.
And it's also like tricky,because, you know, I saw those
reports today about the billiondollars of weapons that, you
know, supposedly, like Biden hadjust approved or whatever. And
(55:27):
then a little bit later, I sawthat, that was actually
something that was already goingthrough Congress. That was like,
the timing of it was gettingsent over like that it was
already it was actually what hadpassed. And like, so he's just
passing it along, because theyfinally passed it. And like
(55:48):
that, but the timing of it, andthe way it's getting reported is
like, Oh, you just held up theweapons. But now you're sending
more, you know, it's like this.
And I'm not even saying, I'm noteven saying that to defend it.
Because I'm what I'm actuallybringing up is that the way that
information is presented, it'sreally hard to know what's true,
because I saw that and I waslike, I don't even have time to
look this up enough to figureout which story is true right
(56:11):
now. You know, but like, I hearboth of these, but I just also
think that like the way thatthings are being reported, it
gets really, really tricky. Tokeep our sense of what is really
happening. And like, thegenocide is terrible, and like,
hey, American imperialism hasalways been terrible. Back to
(56:33):
like, what I was actuallyprotesting in college, which was
American imperialism in theMiddle East. You know, because
we were invading Iraq, after wewere attacked by somebody from
Afghanistan. And that makes nological sense, because it didn't
make any sense. Because itwasn't about that, because it
was actually about, like, thecontrol of resources and
American imperialism. And like,you know, and it kind of, um, I
(56:54):
know someone who is like, fromthe Middle East, and in a group
discussion was they wereactually saying, it's, it's
interesting, because theyactually brought up the resource
thing. They were like, if you'relooking at it from the higher
level, and like, Yes, what'shappening is terrible. But like,
(57:15):
if you're looking at it, fromthe higher level of things, this
is still this part of the worldwhere people have really wanted
to control resources, andthere's just been this huge
fight between several differentfactions of, you know, Iran and,
and Israel and the US, and, youknow, Syria and Saudi Arabia,
(57:39):
and like, all these differentareas to try to control this
area. And again, I'm not sayingany of that to like, like,
America has, it's very muchguilty in that, like, 100%, of
like, of meddling in othercountries and other governments
and trying to have some kind ofcontrol in that way. And that
(58:00):
sucks, but it's like that, likethat still doesn't change the
fact that like, if you don'tvote for Biden, like, I kind of
still go back to that like,okay, so if you're not going to
vote for Biden, like, how doesthat actually help the people
that you're trying to help?
Exactly? No. And like, at thathigher level, like, it's
(58:22):
actually like, it's not it's notthat I'm so against Biden,
although I like it would begreat if we had a younger and
different and more progressivealternative, like 100% But like,
it's also the I don't see it asmuch as like, this is not Biden,
masterminding. This is like he'sdoing the American thing. Like
he's like, he's doing what he'shaving to do. And like, I think
(58:44):
that it's still way, way, waybetter than it would be if Trump
was in charge, because he would100% Just like, be like, hey,
Israel, like have whatever youwant, you know, what I'll send,
I'll send some folks overwhatever ever do you know, or
whatever he would do would be somuch worse for where the people
(59:06):
of Palestine so yes, genocide isterrible. And, you know, and
absolutely, like free Palestine.
And I think that people are sofocused on it, and they're so
focused on it being a black andwhite thing, you know, a yes or
no, it's like a binary thing.
That it's, it's it they losesight of, it's easy to lose
(59:30):
sight of the other factors. Youknow, it's easy to lose sight of
like, if you're prone if you'rerevoking a vote with protest.
What you know, what are you areyou like, oh, yeah, because the
world's burning, you know, andit's like, okay, well, fine.
Yes. And are you just gonna,like, throw gas on it or like,
(59:51):
exactly, ya know, like, andthere are like, terrible things
happening other places, and Ithink that we're so focused on
it. And what's happening inPalestine because it is the
scale of it has been so quick.
And it is such a it is such aterrible thing, that specific
really small land area with somany people. I mean, it's just
(01:00:11):
fucking terrible. And there arealso a lot of other things that
we really need to work on. Andit's just hard. It's hard to
hold all of that. Like it's sohard to hold all of that.
Jenni (01:00:24):
It is I had a I had a moment earlier and I just
thought I sometimes I just thinkI just don't belong here. Like
this just isn't I'm not supposedto I don't this isn't right.
I'm either either. I'm notsupposed to be here, or other
people aren't.
You know, because I do have sucha. I don't know everything. I'm
(01:00:45):
sorry. I have a cat.
Jess (01:00:46):
No, you're doing great. I love it. He
Jenni (01:00:49):
is He He's a pain. I love him though. His name is Spencer.
And here's his little tissuehole. And you know, I just have
such a tender heart. And for meit's like you were saying with
you know, genocide is justwrong. There's no there's
nothing you're going to there'sno context you're going to put
it in somebody I saw somebodysay recently. Well, I don't
understand why so many women andthe LGBTQ plus community are
(01:01:12):
supporting of Palestine becausethey don't like women are LGBT
plus. And I was like, genocideis wrong. Regardless. i It's not
conditional. It's just wrong.
And if we can say that it's okayto do because these people don't
do the things we like. We'regoing to really start twisting
things into well then the nextpeople who do what I don't like
(01:01:35):
then it's okay. It's just whatit has to be wrong. These
children have nothing to do withthe country, the parents the
religion, the system that theywere born into, and nothing to
do with that. And we hate butit's such a weird thing to think
we can't come together on thatgenocide is wrong. That seems
like such an easy square onething to agree on.
(01:01:59):
What a what a weird What a weirdworld. Okay, look at him. He
found a basket. Okay,
Vanessa (01:02:03):
that's amazing. If I fit so
Jess (01:02:06):
sets that's great.
Vanessa (01:02:09):
Okay, gang, we're up at time here. Either of you have
any final thoughts? I
Jess (01:02:14):
do. Because I looked up polyglot and I was so very
wrong. polyglot means you'reable to speak or write several
languages.
Vanessa (01:02:22):
Oh yeah, that's quite a bit.
Jess (01:02:25):
Maybe next time I will come back with the because I saw
this I saw something where itwas like a really cool name for
spawn from a polyamorous verycool. Anyway, I will come back
with some more randompolyamorous terms just to
entertain people the next timethat's that'll I'll give myself
(01:02:47):
that homework. But yeah, I justwanted to call myself out that I
was I was totally wrong aboutthat. That's not what that means
at all. Yeah, somebody waslistening and this was a great
other than that this was a greatI know we've we've had this
conversation has gone all sortsof places. And yeah, the show is
like got a little serious. Buthey, you know, that's what the
show is. And and yeah, everybodygo vote. That's it. Yes, we got
(01:03:12):
a while I'm gonna keep probablykeep saying that. I still think
you should vote. The way that Ithink you should vote, but like,
I still think people shouldvote.
Vanessa (01:03:21):
But the voting it's got you might not. Some people won't
show up to vote just becausethey're not into the
presidential election. Butthere's all the other elections,
all the local stuff, all thestates election
Jenni (01:03:32):
is your most important.
Exactly. If you want to votelocally, every single time
period. The thing is, they'regonna know I'm here. My vote
never counts in the winnerstally ever not here, not where I
live, but they are going to knowI'm here. Because if I don't
show up, they're just they thinkthey can do whatever they want.
(01:03:54):
Because I'm not gonna sayanything about it. And it
doesn't. It doesn't do much ifit's just me. No, no. Right. I
know who you would vote for.
Jess (01:04:08):
This cat is fantastic.
Vanessa (01:04:10):
It's really very cool.
That's pretty cute. Especiallywhen you're standing the camera.
Okay. He's a beautiful way.
Okay, you too. Thank you forbeing on tonight. Just always
wonderful to see you. Jenny. Ican't wait to be in between your
legs. And people are gonna belike, What the fuck Vanessa, you
(01:04:32):
were just suicide on now you'retalking about? It's, I'm on
hormones again. I found out thatmy hormone levels were very low
because my dosage. Myprescription had gotten changed.
And I was only taking onemilligram of estrogens of six
unknowingly, because myprescription is completely
different. And that was mydifferent medication. And I just
(01:04:55):
started ADHD meds too. So alittle bit more with it. Now
hormones are very important. Ifit's something that Taryn and I
talked about in the lastepisode, if you're feeling off,
get your hormones checked, youknow. And as you just never
know,
Jenni (01:05:09):
just it was such a pleasure to meet you.
Jess (01:05:11):
It was great to meet you, Jenny. And thanks for having me.
Yeah. Thanks for having me onVanessa and, and Jenny's cat.
Vanessa (01:05:19):
Jenny's cat. By Chinese kitty, thank you for watching
and listening to transcendinghumanity. Don't forget to send
us money, please money, send it.
Bye bye
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