Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
I brought the five
love languages to one of my
practices that I was very closewith and I said you know, okay,
we're going to just kind ofinformally change this for the
workplace.
Well, that's when I stumbledinto.
There actually is the lovelanguages translated to the
workplace.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Welcome to the
Veterinary Blueprint podcast
brought to you by Butler VetInsurance.
Hosted by Bill Butler, theVeterinary Blueprint podcast is
for veterinarians and practicemanagers who are looking to
learn about working on theirpractice instead of in their
practice.
Each episode we will bring yousuccessful, proven blueprints
from others, both inside andoutside the veterinary industry.
(00:42):
Welcome to today's episode.
Speaker 3 (00:45):
Hello everyone,
welcome back to the Veterinary
Blueprints podcast, whereVeterinary Care meets business
ownership.
I am your host, bill Butler,and in today's fast-paced world,
so many veterinarians facepractices face challenges in
attracting and retaining toptier talent.
More so, efforts to showappreciation sometimes miss the
(01:08):
mark.
This leads to frustrations thatcan erode practice culture and
the crucial bond between thosepractice owners and managers and
your staff.
But don't worry, for today wehave someone who has decoded
this intricate dance ofworkplace appreciation not
attrition appreciation.
It helps alleviate attrition.
(01:29):
Burry paps, a top producingsales representative with a
career in animal health atNovartis, alonco and Beringer
Ingle Time, and now isrepresenting her own company at
other centered growth.
She is not only versed inbuilding relationships, but is
also a certified facilitator inlanguages of appreciation in the
workplace.
(01:49):
This innovative concept mirrorsthe popular five love languages
many of us have heard of I notso much.
I'm just going to be honest wassomething that Marie embraced
in 2020 to address the criticalissues she was observing among
her veterinary practice clients.
Marie will be sharing herinsights on how these languages
can bridge the gap, fosteringhealthy organizational culture
(02:12):
and robust employer-employeerelationships.
So if you've been grapplingwith talent retention and I know
many practices have.
If your gestures ofappreciation seem to be falling
on deaf ears, then today'sepisode with a remarkable Marie
Paps will be enlightening.
So let's dive right in, marie.
Thanks for joining us today.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
Thanks for having me
on.
It's always good to see you.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
It is always good to
see you.
So what's interesting is youand I, as we talked about we
talk about frequently is ourconnection.
My cousin, Tim, was one of yourco-workers for quite some time
at a couple of yourpharmaceutical, animal health
jobs, and when I launched mybook last fall he got us
(02:57):
connected and we've been off tothe races since then,
collaborating in your role, indoing what you do and what I do
and what I do in the veterinaryinsurance world.
So it's been an awesomerelationship and we're going to
chat today about somethingthat's a little more unique that
we haven't gotten into muchdetail on, but why don't you
(03:21):
share with our listeners today alittle bit about Marie, where
you're coming from today, whereyou're at today and how you got
started in the veterinary andanimal services world?
Speaker 1 (03:35):
It's such an honor to
be here talking about this very
important topic because I foundit to be a subject that every
one of my practices wasstruggling with and it really is
what prompted me to getcertified as a Languages of
Appreciation Facilitator.
So I started in animal healthway back I don't want to say how
many years ago, but it was 2000.
(03:56):
I graduated college and joinedNovartis Animal Health and it
was such a great opportunity.
I had an opportunity to serve alot of different animal
practices in differentcapacities, but it was in my
role as key account manager withElanco that I really got to
take a much deeper dive intowhat goes on behind the scenes
at animal practices.
When you're a sales rep andyou're slinging vaccines and
(04:19):
heartworm and all kinds of otherdoggie drugs, you tend to deal
with just the medicine.
But that role as key accountreally led me into what was
going on with the practice andin meeting with the owners and
the managers I was hearingthings like we're doing so much
for our team and yet we're stillstruggling with this lack of
(04:40):
appreciation, this culture war,where they're like now one's
happy and there's all thisfriction.
And it just got to be reallyfrustrating for them because
they felt they were doing somuch but it wasn't landing as
intended.
Speaker 3 (04:55):
So while you were
doing the pharmaceutical animal
health gig in 2020, you saw theneed for this languages of
appreciation, or just howbusiness owners, practice
managers, practice owners wereinteracting with their team and
a disconnect about what theythought they were doing from an
(05:15):
appreciation standpoint, but itdidn't really come through.
So you decided to jump in andassist them and tell me a little
bit about the training or thecertification or what really
spoke to you about thislanguages of appreciation.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
So when I would meet
with business owners and the
head veterinarians, the practicemanagers, I would hear them
talk about their challenges andI kept going back to books from
my personal life, my parentinglife, my marriage life, and
often there would be many booksthat I could recommend to them
that came from the family.
Personal side, and one that keptcoming up over and over again
(05:53):
was the five love languages, andthe concept is that we each
speak love in a different andvery unique language, and the
concept lands pretty heavy whereyou're like, if I'm in Spain
and I don't speak Spanish, I'mgoing to have a very difficult
time communicating, but yet if Idid speak the native language,
(06:14):
then I would be a ton moreeffective.
Everything would be a lot morepleasant.
So I brought the five lovelanguages to one of my practices
that I was very close with andI said, okay, we're going to
just kind of informally changethis for the workplace.
Well, that's when I stumbledinto there actually is the love
languages translated to theworkplace, and I think that's a
(06:35):
great relief to anyone with anHR slant, because one of the
languages is physical touch andso obviously we want to be
mindful of that in the workplace.
Speaker 3 (06:45):
Absolutely, and so
you're using some of the
insurance we sell to ourpractices which you don't want
to use.
All right.
So for those on the podcasttoday listening learning about
the languages of appreciationfor the first time, how would
you briefly describe how thosefive love languages evolved into
(07:06):
the professional ones, to keepyou out of trouble, and how did
that evolution take place?
Speaker 1 (07:13):
Yeah, so at a really
high level.
The five languages are words ofaffirmation, quality time, acts
of service, gifts and physicaltouch, and all of them have a
place in every one of ourrelationships and if you dig
into this concept, you'll findlove languages for children.
It's a wonderful concept, butin the workplace what's exciting
(07:36):
about languages of appreciation, and what prompted me to get
certified as a facilitator, isthat one appreciation can be
free, and I think that reallyreally resonates with a lot of
practices on your cash flow.
And aren't some of the bestthings in life free?
So I think that first perked upa lot of my practice's
(07:57):
attention like, yeah, free, thatsounds great.
The other thing is that it'seasy to apply and once you go
through some of the concepts,you're like this is not
difficult.
You can do a fairly light touchon this concept and then apply
it throughout the practice andthen in your personal life as
(08:17):
well.
So, yes, there are assessmentsand quizzes where you can take
to find out what your languagesof appreciation are in the
workplace.
But what I like to teach thegroups is, even in the absence
of that quiz, let's go throughthe high levels and what really
is going to resonate with theteam.
Speaker 3 (08:37):
I was on a call with
some other insurance
professionals the other day andthey were talking about
appreciation in the workplaceand there was one thing that
people want more than love ormoney and it's praise and
recognition and just beingrecognized for a good job.
And I think it's so easy as,again, this podcast is about
(09:01):
business ownership andentrepreneurship.
I have a team that I have toremember.
Somebody does a good job.
You need to recognize them forthat, for the good job.
It's not just, hey, they didthe job they were hired to do,
they did a good job andrecognize that.
I think that's probably a lotof what this might go to, marie.
So, when you're talking aboutappreciation and the language of
(09:25):
appreciation like free and easy, sounds really nice how do you
implement that and what are somecues that appreciation is
needed in an organization?
Speaker 1 (09:34):
Yeah, I think
oftentimes we do take for
granted that the team needs tobe lifted up and appreciated,
and so when you're walkingthrough the halls of your
practice and you're listeningwith fresh ears, you want to be
looking for discouragements,irritability and resistance to
policy.
When you're rolling somethingout, there's a grumbling Want to
be mindful of watching forabsenteeism, tardiness, because
(09:57):
that's really starting to showlack of engagement and if they
don't care, why should I care?
That starts creeping in Sarcasm, cynicism, apathy, social
withdrawal.
Speaker 3 (10:09):
You're describing me
to a T, so that sounds like a
problem.
Sarcasm and cynicism, uh-oh.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
It all has its place.
Speaker 3 (10:17):
It all has its place.
So when you start to hear thosethings creeping in or you
notice them, what can you do?
Again, that free and easycomponent and the languages of
appreciation.
So those are the cues.
How do you kind of turn thataround and what are some things
you can do as a practice to stopthose things?
Speaker 1 (10:38):
I think the most
important thing is to recognize
it's not about the money, and sothere's this massive disconnect
with employers and employeeswhen they're going through exit
interviews, 89% of managersthink that their people have
left for more money, whenactually only 12% leave for more
money.
Speaker 3 (10:56):
Holy cow.
Speaker 1 (10:58):
And that's a massive
change, especially when a
business is thinking, oh, wehave to raise our wages.
Well, let's pump the brakes onthat first.
Are there some other leversthat we can pull?
And what we've found is thatit's actually 79% of people are
citing lack of appreciation as amassive reason why they're
leaving.
So then yeah, let's dig intohow do you do that.
(11:19):
And not every language isspoken in the same percent of
intensity.
So if we take a look at whatpeople's primary language of
appreciation is, words ofaffirmation is 47% of the
workforce's number one language.
So words are free.
(11:40):
We don't want cheap words, butwe want authentic words, and so
we can start right now.
Speaker 3 (11:46):
We want free words
with high value.
Speaker 1 (11:48):
Exactly exactly, and
you can't just use them lightly.
We have to use them withintention and there is a way to
do it.
So the first thing when we'retaking a look at words of
affirmation is how do we do it?
And there's really threecomponents and we've got to nail
this.
Number one we've got to usetheir name, always use their
(12:10):
name in that recognition,whether it's in notes, whether
we're talking to them directly.
It gets their attention andjust really resonates.
And then we need to make surewe're using it accurately.
So if we've got someone who hasa difficult name like take the
time, learn how to pronouncetheir name properly so we want
to use their name.
The second key component isthese and their proper name.
Speaker 3 (12:29):
Right too, because so
my name is William.
I go by Bill, like, hey, will,great job.
Like I'm going to look at youlike that's not my name.
My name's not Will, I've neverbeen Will, no, and so the
nickname, or anything else, itneeds to be genuine, it needs to
be their name, because it'sthat radio station that we're
all listening to, wiifm.
What's in it for me?
And the number one thing youknow, if you're in a crowd and
(12:52):
somebody yells your name,everyone turns because they
always want it.
Oh, who's talking about me?
So that really hits home for alot of the personal growth and
professional development I do.
It talks about making sure thatyou're just from a sales
perspective, when you're talkingto somebody, use their name
Marie, you're, like I said, myname.
(13:13):
You perk up, you immediatelypay more attention when your
name's used, right.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Absolutely, and you
definitely want to ask people
like what's their preferred name?
And when we find names that youknow aren't William or Marie,
like that's pretty standard.
Nobody can really screw that up, even though I get Mary and
Maria all the time, that's cool.
But you know, take the time.
If someone's got a you know aname that you're not familiar
with.
I had a doctor everyone calledhim Dr A, dr A, and I was like
(13:42):
I'm going to try a little harderand it took me a long time, but
his name is Dr Antonichich.
Right, like that doesn't justroll off, but it was appreciated
when I could actually use hisfull name and so take the time,
you know.
So username.
Next component is you want itto be specific.
You know what did they do.
And then the third, andprobably that frosting on the
(14:05):
appreciation cake, is what wasthe impact?
Because that's what reallyseals it and that's the piece
that oftentimes we forget andthat's where the magic is.
Speaker 3 (14:16):
So you know, I'm at a
practice, I'm a vet tech and
I've done something well,handled a bad patient experience
, because those happen all thetime.
I handled a bad patientexperience in a great manner,
and how would you kind of conveythat to me if you give me an
example of what that would soundlike?
Speaker 1 (14:39):
Yeah, Bill, I'm so
grateful you were here today
because when Rosie walked in,like everyone kind of like
stiffens up when Rosie walks inbecause we know how difficult
she is to handle but man, youreally stepped it up.
You kept your cool, you wereable to handle her so calmly.
She didn't even flinch when wewent in to do that nail trim and
(14:59):
so I mean you put everybody atease.
Rosie felt great and the ownerdidn't hear screaming and
barking from the lobby.
So thanks a lot.
Speaker 3 (15:09):
So that was free.
It sounds pretty easy, and so Ithink one of the last things
that we'll kind of touch ontoday is there seems to be a
disconnect between the effortthat gets put in into
appreciating their team and howemployees are interpreting their
efforts.
So I might hear that adifferent way than you're
(15:31):
putting that out there.
So what's the breakdown, or howhelp our listeners understand
where that disconnect might comefrom?
Because I might seem like or Imight think well, I tell them
they're doing a great job allthe time.
I don't know what the problemis.
They just walk around here,they're grumpy, they're
irritable, they're sarcastic,and I tell them they're doing a
great job every single day asthe practice owner, but it
(15:53):
doesn't seem like it'sresonating.
So where's that disconnectcoming from?
Speaker 1 (15:58):
It's misusing the
golden rule and forgetting that
there's actually a better one.
There's the platinum rule.
So everyone's familiar with thegolden rule Do unto others as
you would have them do unto you.
And so when you walk into theroom or your entire world,
thinking you know, I think Ishould be saying great job,
that's what feels good to me andthat's what's going to feel
good to everybody.
And that is, by hands down, theeasiest way to go wrong with
(16:21):
everyone and that's whatlanguage of appreciation shares
with you is that if we followthe platinum rule, which is, do
unto others as they would haveyou do unto them, then that's
where it really lands.
Okay, so let's go back to thatwords of appreciation.
If words of appreciation is mylanguage and there's different
(16:42):
ways to communicate it, sothere's written, there's in a
small group, there's verbal andthere's in a large group.
Well, bill, if you were someonewho was absolutely mortified of
being called out in front ofeveryone which, spoiler alert,
most people are if you hatepublic recognition and I pull
you up to the front of the staffmeeting right, put your name on
(17:04):
a plaque or certificate whatdid I do wrong?
Not only did what did I do wrong, but then some people are like
you know, oh great, you know nowI'm the brown nose, or you know
, however they're.
Speaker 3 (17:14):
However, they're
interpreting how that came
through.
It wasn't received the way Ithought it like.
I called them out in front ofthe team meeting.
I told them they did a greatjob and instead they were more
fired and they wished it neverwould have.
I wish I hadn't done the goodthing.
You just train them not to dothe good thing next time,
because they don't want to getcalled out right.
Speaker 1 (17:32):
Yeah.
So what we want to encouragepeople to do is with the words.
You know you want to startsmaller and go bigger.
You know you want to grow intoit, and so the first thing I
might encourage them to do is,you know, make that comment one
on one and then see where itresonates.
You know I might sprinkle in anote and then get a feel, for
you know how public they like it, but that's really important
(17:55):
that you give it to the way thatthey want.
Follow that platinum rule.
And then where I found thatmost practices were going wrong
is they were doing gifts, whichthat is the least preferred
language.
And so you know, you're hittingeverybody up on vet tech week
and you want the coffee mugs andthe it.
It doesn't land, it's expensiveand the difficulty is it's so
(18:18):
not one size fits all.
You know we're gettingStarbucks for everybody.
I'm a Duncan gal, oh well thatwas a miss.
Speaker 3 (18:26):
You know, yeah, and
you know one thing that that
hits me is is we do somepersonality testing here at
Butler Vet Insurance for ourteam, and there's there's one of
the one of the components onthe test is is an economic
driver whether somebody's driveneconomically, and what's
interesting is there's actuallytwo economic drivers.
There's money, but then there'salso time, and if you waste
(18:46):
somebody's time, that can,that's worse than telling them
that costs $100.
Like, I would rather pay you$100 to not have to spend any
time with you or have you wastemy time.
And so I'm a high economic, butmy economic is time, not
necessarily money.
So I'm not driven by money, I'mdriven by time, and so meeting
people where they are is reallyimportant, and one thing that
(19:06):
that I know is resonated and hasworked well with me is is those
hand written notes and notdelivered at the at the office,
but or or the practice, butmailing that card to their house
.
You don't have to have a giftcard in there, it doesn't have
to be that Starbucks card whenthey're, when they're a Duncan
or you know whatever chain whereyou're at.
What's the big coffee shop downin Chicago?
(19:27):
I mean, Starbucks obviously iseverywhere.
But what's the big chain in inChicago that rivals Starbucks?
Speaker 1 (19:34):
I mean it's Duncan.
Speaker 3 (19:35):
It's one of the two
yeah.
So we have Caribou up here,because it was a Minnesota
company.
That's where they came from.
So Caribou is starting tospread out.
But those are the big competingones.
But you know, back to the note,the.
The other thing with gettingthat note at home is the
significant other, the spouse.
It's not, you know, you'rewriting that kind of creepy note
.
Back to the bad touch situation.
(19:57):
It's a professional hey, youdid a great job, we really
appreciate you.
And it's them gettingrecognized away from the
workplace in front of theirloved ones and family.
And oftentimes I've, you know,I've done that with my team
those cards make their way tothe office and get put on the
desk at the office, even thoughthey got mailed to the house.
And so you know it doesn't takemuch.
You know it's a stamp in threeor four minutes and when I write
(20:21):
those cards to my team, I sitdown and I just take a quiet
moment and I reflect what youknow.
What do they do?
And again, how, how does thatgoing to be received?
And instead of just thanks fora great job, bill, it's the
impact and what they did and andagain, like you were talking
about meeting them where theyare.
So what's another way thatthere there might be a breakdown
(20:45):
happening, or how can youresonate better as a as a
practice owner or manager whenyou're trying to to give some of
that appreciation to your team?
Speaker 1 (20:56):
I think not feeling
like it's all in your shoulders
as the owner.
You know you're going to haveto model this good behavior, but
it's really most effective whenit's grassroots and it's coming
from everyone and it doesn'thave to all be you.
So you know, I love how youtalk about the currency of time.
Quality time is one thatresonates quite high in the
workplace and sometimes thatmeans one-on-one with the boss,
(21:18):
getting mentored, but most often, if it's quality time, I value
time.
Team building and bonding Nowyou got to be careful.
Some people see that as forcedfun and I just want to get home.
Speaker 3 (21:30):
The time waster.
Yeah, now you know you'rewasting my time.
I'd rather be on lunch bymyself.
Speaker 1 (21:36):
Yes, so you have to
know, like what resonates from
the time.
You know if I'm a big volunteer, if my kids are in Little
League, you know.
So you just have to be reallycareful that, yes, you know what
that language is, but what'sthe dialect.
And so you know, I would rollthis concept out to the
leadership team of the practiceand then from there ask them to
(21:58):
spread it amongst their, youknow, circle of influence.
You know the head techs, themanagers, head lead
receptionists, but then catchthem being good and appreciating
them for appreciating.
You know I saw what you didLike that really meant a lot to
Bill.
Speaker 3 (22:13):
It can't be a week
later either.
Right it has to be.
Speaker 1 (22:16):
Yes, and that's a
thing Like it's.
It does matter to differentpeople and there are some cues
you know.
So the older we are, the moretolerant we are of, the longer
it goes.
And so, like my grandma's, youknow somewhere in heaven being
appreciative of me sending mythank you notes, right, but the
younger the generation is,you've got to give up to them
(22:37):
faster, and so if you've got ayoung team, shoot it off in a
text, you know.
If it isn't within a day or two, you've really lost it.
Speaker 3 (22:47):
Lost it.
Yeah, it can't be.
When you're remembering it thefollowing Monday, you know, back
to the back to the timeliness.
It can't be.
You know, monday when it whenthat happened on Wednesday the
prior week, like they had aweekend, it feels that might not
hit land as well.
Talking about that disconnectpiece, like yeah, that was yeah
(23:09):
I totally forgot.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
Like what are you
even talking about?
You know they've moved on, butI still think like if we're
going to make a mistake, I'drather make it in error
appreciating and have them belike well, that was weird, like
I didn't think that was a bigdeal, then not not saying
anything at all.
Speaker 3 (23:25):
Then not even trying
so.
So if I was a practice owner ormanager and I wanted to dive a
little bit deeper into thisconcept, how would I go about
doing that?
Speaker 1 (23:36):
So the what's great
about it, I think, is this how
it overlaps into your personaland professional life.
So first thing, I would go tothe five love languages website,
because that free, that quizthere is free, and so what's
nice about that is you can goand learn what your love
language is and get comfortablewith that and kind of play
(23:56):
around with that at home.
And then there's also languagesof apology, which is also
pretty fantastic, and then fromthere I probably need that I
probably need that at home.
It has been transformationalwith with my family.
We all thought we spokedifferent languages of apology.
We all speak the exact same one, but how we deliver it is
(24:19):
different and we're like oh mygosh.
That is explained so much.
But then with languages ofappreciation in the workplace,
you know, there are the books,there are the assessments, what?
What I host from from time totime are webinars where we roll
out the concepts at a high level.
We'll be doing some soon, soI'll be sure to get that info to
(24:40):
you.
Okay, but yeah, just goingthrough, like what are the
languages, what percent are themost common, and then digging
into words and how do you, howdo you get into it a little bit
instead of just doing it wrong.
Speaker 3 (24:53):
Yeah, I keep seeing
you offering these, like you've
given this talk a number oftimes at your local Rotary Club
and I'm up in Minnesota, you'redown in Chicago.
I was like man, I wish I couldgo.
Maybe I'll go to a Rotarymeeting down in in Schoenberg or
somewhere in the Chicago areato to visit and catch one of
these live in person.
But so you're offering theselive in person and you're also
doing some of these online.
(25:14):
There's, I'm sure, if youGoogle in the Google machine,
languages of appreciation.
You'll have no trouble findingthis.
But I just want to thank you,marie, for your time today
sharing with us some of theseinsights of languages of
appreciation to help ourpractice owners and managers
appreciate their team, becausethe job market's tight,
(25:36):
everyone's worried about wherethey're going to get their next
team member from, and you don'twant to have to try and to add
more.
So what's probably the lastthought you would leave our
listeners today with?
On what they could do if theyjust did one thing after
listening to this podcast?
What would be the one thingthey could do?
Speaker 1 (25:54):
I would say
immediately go, practice the
words with the three componentsname, specific impact.
You will be amazed at what itmeans personally, professionally
.
But get out and do that andwhen you see the fruits of that,
contact me.
Let's talk some more and go alittle deeper.
Speaker 3 (26:14):
Perfect.
And where can our listenersreach out to you?
Where are you online?
Where can they, where can theyget a hold of you?
Speaker 1 (26:19):
My agency is other
centered growth and we are at
other centered growth dot com.
Lots of information onlanguages there, and then we'll
be having a lot of events posted, both live and virtual, so be
on the lookout for those.
Speaker 3 (26:35):
Great, we'll have
some of your contact information
, the show notes.
You and I are connected onLinkedIn and I see all your
events popping up on LinkedInand I'm just like I'm missing
these in person.
But thanks so much for joiningus, marie, and thank you for
sharing some of your insight andhow our practice owners and
managers can better appreciatetheir team, both in person and
(26:57):
in written form and all thedifferent ways, without having
it be weird and a love languageperspective, but a business
language perspective.
Speaker 1 (27:05):
Yes, absolutely.
It's free, it's meaningful, itreally improves the culture and
they'll be glad they investedthe time in it.
Speaker 3 (27:15):
It's free and easy.
Veterinarians, practicemanagers it's free and easy, so
just invest a little time, look,look out, look out on the
internet and connect with Marieif you want more information.
Well, thanks so much forjoining us, marie, and look
forward to connecting with youagain soon.
Speaker 1 (27:30):
Thanks for the
invitation, Bill.
It's always a pleasure.
Speaker 3 (27:32):
Thanks for tuning in
to Veterinary Blueprints.
If you have any thoughts,questions or suggestions for an
episode, I would love to hearfrom you.
Email me at bill atbutlervetinsurancecom.
Don't forget to subscribe soyou never miss an episode, and
if you could do me a huge favoryou know it helps with the
algorithm.
If you can like, share orcomment on the post, leave a
(27:55):
review, I would love it.
Thanks for tuning in and untilnext time.