March 18, 2025 • 37 mins
Michael Gillespie dives into six wild Reddit relationship stories and offers his unfiltered advice on everything from extreme weight gain to suspicious houseguests.
• A husband struggling with his wife's 500-pound weight gain and how it's affecting their family
• A daughter who found a mysterious young woman in her father's house while his wife was away
• A woman disappointed by new partners after experiencing an exceptional ex-boyfriend
• Someone trying to recover money from an ex who owes them but won't communicate
• A concerning age-gap relationship with physical restraint and controlling behavior
• A marriage suffering from intimacy problems with a disinterested husband
Check out more episodes of WDYM, Hamilton's #1 podcast, and don't forget to subscribe for new episodes every week.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
you're listening to the wdym, the what do you mean?
Podcast, hamilton's number onepodcast.
Now sit back and relax.
Here's hamilton's own, michaelgillespie.
See, listening to the intro.
I never noticed how 80s theintro sounded.
(00:26):
That is circa 1985 type intromusic vibe.
You know I was like man.
I'm listening to the intro likeyo.
That sounds straight from the80s.
That's crazy to me.
But either way, I love it.
I love it.
I love it.
I love it.
(00:47):
Welcome to the WDYM podcast.
I'm your host, michaelGillespie.
Hope everybody's doing good.
Hope everybody is doing well.
Today's episode.
We're going a little old schoolas far as what we're doing today
.
We are doing a reddit on reddit.
I haven't done one this season.
(01:07):
I wanted to do one because ofthe effects of the crystal
classic that we just had.
Crystal classic is a sleepdepriving event that we have
here in Fairfield for show choir.
That requires almost 20, 29, 30, 31 hours of consistency,
(01:29):
staying on your feet, workingwith people, working with
schools and all that jazz.
Uh, just get off that.
Um, so, sleep deprived.
I'm like yo, I gotta do apodcast.
Keep the, keep it going, keepeverything moving, naturally,
and what other, what other thingto do than a Reddit on Reddit.
So, without further ado, I gotsix stories for you and we're
(01:52):
going to get straight into it.
With the first story titled,the first story from True
Concern 1219.
My wife, 34 female, is spiralingand I, 36 male, am tired of
covering for her.
I need her to get her weightunder control, but we've been
(02:13):
down this road before and italways eventually falls apart.
How can I help her See, I'mserious and salvage this Now.
This is a long read, so with me, here we go.
Before I start, I want to makeone thing clear I love my wife.
She's the mother of my twochildren.
She's intelligent, funny.
(02:34):
I've always been, and remain,attracted to her.
She's always been a heavier setwhen we first met.
I've never had a problem withthat, except in so far.
Now, again, as I read this iswhat I'm reading exactly word
for word from the reddit onreddit insofar as it affects our
(02:55):
family quality of life, I'llexplain below for some
background.
We have been married for nineyears and she has steadily,
steadily gained weight over thecourse of our marriage.
This was particularlyexaggerated by the difficult
pregnancy which was me, followedby covid, lockdowns and her
losing her long-term job.
Things continue to get out ofhand until early last year when
(03:18):
some incidents finally convincedher to see a doctor.
Get thing, get control ofthings.
Her weight was well over 500pounds and her doctor prescribed
some zeb bound and recommendedshe start seeing a therapist.
This worked fairly well for awhile, though she almost
immediately quit therapy and bythe end of the last summer by
the end of last summer she hadlost almost 20 pounds.
(03:41):
She had also generally improvedher outlook, gotten a part-time
job and was much moreattractive.
We love taking walks together.
Things took a turn for the worsein two, in two ways last fall.
First, my job switch insuranceplans, one that didn't cover glp
I don't know what that is, uh,glp minus ones for weight loss
(04:03):
and second, I can't rememberpathway pretty suddenly, which
caused a lot of grief and stress.
She was home from work forabout a month for one
bereavement after the passing,and at the same time her binge
eating, which had beensuppressed by Zip down, returned
with a fury.
This blend into the holidays,which are obviously not good for
(04:26):
anyone's waistline, and thisyear she basically fallen back
into her old habits.
I don't know her current weight, but she definitely gained it
back plus some.
That's where the advice portionstarts.
I've had started adjusting mylife in a lot of ways to
accommodate her limitations, andthe list grows longer each week
(04:47):
.
While no means exhaustive, thislist includes she is unable to
put her socks or shoes on ortrim her toenails on her own,
always need help getting up fromthe sofa, which is pretty low,
or playing with the kids toschool, despite working from
home myself, because she is toobig to safely fit behind the
(05:10):
wheel.
When friends invite us out,have to make excuses to cancel
plans and lie to them to avoidadmitting things like no, we
can't come out because she can'tstand up for too long.
Our social life is in a tank.
Our romantic life sucks.
Basically all dates are stay athome, take out and watch a
(05:30):
movie, because she gets soanxious about restaurants, can't
fit in movie theaters and can'tdo most things that involve
physical activity.
Most weekdays when she isn'tworking, she barely leaves bed,
leaving me to work full time andto do all the child care at the
same time.
Once they're home from school,grocery shopping is a nightmare
(05:50):
because she can't really staystanding up long enough.
But it's too proud to rollaround on one of those store
scooters, so she stays in thecar, calls me airpods and tells
me what to get, and if I refuseher anything, suddenly I'm being
manipulative or insulting herweight.
(06:12):
The whole thing makes me feellike a drug dealer or something.
Every week on sunday shebasically hypes herself up about
how this would be the week toturn everything around, but then
she never changes anything.
And if I remind her what shesaid and try to curb her eating
choices, I'm not being helpful.
(06:33):
I'm honestly getting real sickof all this and feel like feel
close to snapping.
To top everything off, my jobis partially funded by federal
grant money so, as of two weeksago, I'm unemployed and looking
for work.
I can't handle everything thatI'm being asked to do and the
stress is killing me to a point.
I frequently fantasize aboutrunning away just to book a
(06:54):
plane and leave her to deal withthings for a weekend.
I would never actually do that,but it makes you feel like a
terrible husband and father toeven have those thoughts.
I feel like I'm living infather to even have those
thoughts.
I feel like I'm living in aloop of broken promises and
plans every week.
I don't know how to get it tostick.
Obviously, I've been heavilyconsidering the health insurance
plan for whenever I look intowork next, as GLP-1s have been
(07:22):
the only thing that reallyhelped so far.
How can I show her how much I'mhurting without looking shallow
or selfish?
How can I get one of her dietattempts to stick?
While we wait for anotheropportunity to get the drugs
Weight loss drugs, to bespecific, for the foreseeable
(07:42):
future, I'm going to have to doextra because she can't
physically help right now with alot of things.
I a plan and an end in sight.
I'm gonna go nuts.
So true, concern.
1219 what in the world are yougonna do?
Okay, so here we go.
First, one of the day, trulyConcerned.
(08:05):
1219,.
You got yourself into this messwhen you married her and you
knew she was a little bit plussize.
Now, now you know that's plusplus size.
We talking 500 pounds, that's alot.
(08:25):
I mean anything with 500,.
If it's money, that sounds likea lot.
If it's Lego pieces, thatsounds like a lot.
500 miles, that like a lot.
500 miles, that's a lot.
So you knew what you weregetting into when you signed up
(08:45):
for it and now it seems likeshe's gotten used to a life
where she can dictate life toyou.
But again, you said some keythings that should be triggering
you, like marriage.
You are married.
Marriage for me is a joining oftwo people become one.
(09:08):
And right now it's 80 20, her.
She's up, you got your airpods,is shopping and she's telling
you what to get.
What is she saying?
Says okay, we're gonna call youTruth concern, get those
twinkies over there, Get themnow.
(09:29):
What is she saying in thoseairpods hey, you know those
ho-hos In the diet section, goahead, give me some of those.
At one point you have to lether know, like, look, this is
not what I signed up for.
I understand, you shouldunderstand.
(09:52):
In a marriage, things are goingto get big, get small, go up, go
down.
Marriage is a rollerco rollercoaster ups and downs and
everything.
This is part of part of theplan, but at some point you got
to put your foot down and standup.
There's certain things that shecan't.
She can't even put her shoes on, huh, and the thing that
(10:13):
concerns me the most, she saidyou, she can't even trim them
toenails.
Huh, if you're laying in bedand she turns over and swipe,
swipe, you could lose a legbecause toenails grow and now
those are strong.
So, my brother.
This is what you gotta do, one.
You have to force life into her.
You gotta go on walks.
(10:33):
You gotta get salads.
You gotta get vegetables.
You gotta get.
Don't you buy no pop.
Don't you bring no sugarythings in the house.
Don't you bring those chips inthe house.
You got to look.
I'm here to help you becauseyou need help, because you're my
significant other and I care,and I'm letting you know
(10:53):
straight up this is what's goingto happen.
We're going to take walks Threetimes a week, three times a day
, whatever you set, and when youget home you're gonna get us,
you're gonna get you a nicehealthy, hearty salad with
carrots and hype it up carrots,cucumbers, croutons, and that's
(11:16):
what we're eating.
And guess what?
We're gonna have the nice icescoldest water with a lemon in it
.
Right, start there, put yourfoot down and let the progress
show and you gotta, you gotta bestrong, you gotta be headstrong
when you do this, because a lotof people you can't change
people unless they see that youmean it right.
(11:38):
So, start like that, get thatgoing that way and don't don't
buckle.
Don't buckle because I, fromwhat I could tell, I mean I
can't really like her life willfall apart if you're not there.
But it seems like you want tobe there.
You know what I'm saying, butyou, you wrote the paragraph
that long, so it seems like youwant to be there.
(12:01):
You have to set those goals forher and for you and be there
for her.
That's the thing.
You have to do it that way.
Do that, give it 30 days andsee if she can get some progress
.
But you have to be firm withthat.
You have to be firm with that.
You have to be firm with that.
Good luck to you.
(12:22):
True concern 12, 19.
Boy, you said 500 pounds, bro.
There's nothing wrong.
There's nothing wrong withliking things big and stuff we
all like things.
Be big Mac.
We don't go toMcDonald'sdonald's for a little
mac or mac jr.
Wow, you know.
Hey, teach us on again.
(12:43):
I ain't judging, but I'll giveyou some advice the best way I
can.
Topic number two, byunaccomplished gear 736 I, 33,
female.
Caught my dad, 63, male,cheating question mark.
All right, here we go.
(13:04):
I went to my dad's house todaywhile his wife 58, and
half-sister, 23, were away on atrip.
I never had a mother, so he'sthe only parent I've ever had
question mark.
Now let me stop right there.
What?
Okay, I've always looked up tohim when I walk in.
(13:25):
A woman I've never seen beforewas lounging on the couch
wearing only an oversized shirt,which looked like his, with no
pants, casually dyeing her hair.
There were high heels tossed atthe entrance.
She didn't speak my language,stared at me in a in a halfway
that felt bold, like I was theone intruding in my own home.
I asked her who she was.
(13:48):
Instead of giving me a normalresponse, she dodged the
question and just said her namein english.
No explanation, no attempt atbasic manners.
My dad, who's 63, walked in afew minutes later and introduced
me to her in english, but shestill didn't acknowledge me
until he literally had to sayhello to get her to react.
Then she just got up barefootand walked to the bathroom like
(14:10):
he's, like she owned the place.
He even asked if she, if she,wanted him to help dye the back
of her hair.
I pulled him aside and askedDad, who is she?
He said a friend of a friend.
I asked what friend?
And he just threw out somerandom person's name, someone
none of us ever heard of.
When I asked why is she here, hegave me a half-assed story
(14:34):
about her being a refugee thatthis supposed friend asked him
to help.
Asked him straight up if she isa cheese worker Again, quick
pause and explanation.
This is a G show.
You won't have to substitutewhat the cheese really means.
But if you know the show andyou know Reddit on Reddit, you
know what cheese is.
(14:54):
And he laughed and said no way.
I asked so is she staying herebecause she has nowhere to go?
He immediately said no, no, no,nothing like that, just a favor
for a friend.
So then, why is she here?
But my dad has no connection torefugees, and definitely not to
young women like her.
And even if that was somewhattrue, why is she half naked in
(15:18):
our house, with freshly dyedhair?
To make things even weirder, hecalled me at 1130 pm last night
asking if I was still at thehouse.
I didn't think much about it atthe time, but now it's obvious
he was checking to make sure Iwasn't there.
The whole thing made me sickthe way she was so comfortable,
(15:38):
the way he talked to her and thefact that she looked my age or
younger.
When I left I said goodbye.
She didn't say anything back.
She sat there like I wasirrelevant.
I was so disgusted I texted mydad afterwards.
Tell your quote unquote friendthat his basic manners is to say
goodbye instead of ignoring me.
I called my half sister, who's23, because at first I thought
(16:02):
maybe it was one of her friends.
But when I described what I saw, she was just as shocked as I
was.
She had no idea who this womanwas.
We talked on the phone and Inearly cried.
We've always seen our dad as agood, humble man.
This is just horrifying.
For now I asked her not to sayanything to her mom until we
(16:24):
know more.
We don't know what to do.
I don't know how to even lookat him.
Now I really feel sad anddisgusted.
I guess I'm posting this justto get support and sympathy,
because I feel like the onlyparent I have is gone.
I feel so disgusted with himand wondering how to get past
this situation.
So accomplish gear 7, 3, 6.
(16:47):
I got a sound bite for you,ready, here you go.
My mom told me to tell you tomind your damn business.
Look here, your dad is 63.
I mean, from what you'retelling me, his wife is 58.
(17:09):
And your half-sister is 23.
Everybody is adults in thehouse, right?
Do you not think his wife knowssomething?
Or knows that this person is inthe house, or something like
that?
Do you really think your dad isout there running streets with
(17:30):
a young lady who's about yourage, at 33?
That's weird.
And for you to just be allheartbroken and, oh my dad, what
are you doing?
And here you go.
My mom told me to tell you, tomind your damn mind, he has
grown 63.
He's grown.
(17:51):
Leave him alone.
Listen, he is obligated.
He is married, 58-year-old wife, I mean you, 33-year-old female
.
Why are you all in your dad63-year-old?
Why are you in his business?
(18:12):
This, listen?
This is why you just need tochill and just let him handle
his his thing.
If, even if, he is playing likethat which he shouldn't, which
I doubt it.
I mean, come on, man, he's 63and you said she's your age or
younger, so let's just say,hypothetically, she's 30.
Ain't no 30 year old womanlooking for that, right?
(18:36):
I mean some things calledcommon sense, sense.
Common sense has got to comeinto this situation where you
know, you know you and you knowyour dad ain't playing this,
ain't doing this, right?
Plus, this is your dad, right.
So you should know your dadactions and behaviors because
he's your dad.
(18:57):
If your dad has no history ofdoing this, why is he doing it
now and again with someone whois basically the age of his
child?
You think you think he's doingsomething?
You think I don't think so.
I just think you need to mindyour business because,
especially you over his house, Ijust think you should mind your
business on that, on that one,I just think, I just think you,
(19:18):
you reaching your business onthat, on that one, I just think,
I just think you reaching, youreaching, you thinking, you
assuming, because mom and halfsister were gone, you think he
doing dirt guess what?
Not all men do dirt right.
And let alone, if he was doingdirt, why would your butt be
(19:39):
over there, would you think?
Would you think he'd be betterat this?
But maybe because he's 63, hethought he was, he was clear and
he could just do whatever.
I don't know.
I think you're reaching again.
Just mind your business, yourdad, your dad, old bro, just
just let it go like, like that.
You know, don't, don't, don'tassume that that's the case.
(20:04):
Next story by scrambled egg 02.
Here we go.
Scrambled egg 02.
How do I, female 22, enjoycheese with other people when my
ex who who was also male 22,was so much better.
I female 22, broke up with myex, male 22, almost two years
(20:28):
ago.
The cheese was so indescribablygood that I don't know that
anyone else will ever be able tolive up to it, that anyone else
will ever be able to live up toit.
It's always disappointing withother people, even ones that I
have deep emotional connections,dated one for a year and
(20:48):
genuinely really loved.
I generally think it's becauseof his girth.
I mean, I wasn't expecting thisone.
Generally think it's because ofhis baseball bat again, g-show,
and how, oh man, and how Ishould have reread this one.
I just looked at the top andread it and went from there
(21:12):
Start all over.
I generally think it's becauseof his baseball bat and how just
like strong he is.
So I got manhandled.
Not many other people could dothat manhandling part, but of
course can't change the baseballbat.
How can I get over it?
Is there something specific Ican do that will make it better
(21:37):
with other people, or did my exjust ruin cheese for me forever?
All right, scrambled egg Zerotwo.
We got some problems here, allright.
First off, you're 22.
Okay, you got time to get overthis, right?
(22:00):
So you can't.
You know, baseball bats arejust that baseball bats, it's
how you swing the bat.
Okay, you gotta let these, letthese men know how you like to
play baseball in g.
Show people.
(22:20):
I need you guys to think, I mean, there's nothing wrong with the
communication.
It sounds like a communicationissue with whoever you are
seeing and dating and stuff likethat Is cheese room for you.
You could be lactose intolerant, you could be, but you're not.
You just got used to somethingbecause you're 22.
(22:41):
You are young, you is a puppy.
You just started.
Don something because you're 22.
You are young, you is a puppy,you just started.
Don't do that to yourself.
What you got to do is one Maybethat's your type and you find
that similar type.
That's number one.
Two Let them know what you, thethings you like.
(23:03):
You ever play 20 questions.
Maybe you should do that.
Play some 20 questions and putout hints that, hey, you know I
like to play baseball from timeto time and you know that's what
you like, okay, and then, andthen normally normal guys go oh,
(23:24):
oh, really, okay, let me takesome notes.
There's nothing wrong withcommunicating what you like and
see if you can play baseballthat way and have cheese
together.
That's what you should do.
I think you should communicate,you know, find your type,
communicate that hey, this ishow you like to play baseball,
and wish you nothing but thebest.
(23:45):
I mean, there ain't reallynothing I could say about that.
It's just you're 22.
Quit, quit acting like life isover because you've had things
one way.
There's multiple ways to crackan egg, scrambled egg, old too.
You see what I did there.
So, yes, communicate and findwhat you like.
I mean, that's basically how itgoes to, and if you can't find
(24:06):
it, keep searching.
You are 22, you are a puppy.
You will find what you want.
Next, my 20 year old, 24 yearold male ex, 21 year old female
owes me money, but we haven'tspoken over a month.
How do I get it back?
This is from thick distributionfor a six.
(24:28):
My ex was in bad debt over fourmonths ago.
I decided to pay it off for herand she said I'll pay it back
to you Once I have enough.
The last time we spoke aboutmoney, she said she was 1500 in
debt and that was two months ago.
We broke up since and ended onbad terms.
She says she didn't want totalk to me again and we haven't
(24:51):
contacted in over a month.
I'm currently in a financialsituation and you need your
money back, but it seems like Iwon't be getting it back.
How would I go about it?
At least asking for it'spossible for her to pay me back.
Well, this is this is gonna beshort you ain't getting your
money back.
You guys ended on bad terms andyou haven't talked in over a
(25:15):
month.
You know the funny thing aboutmoney and friends because I know
about this experience itdoesn't go well.
It doesn't blend well at all.
No, despite, despite how longthe friendship is.
And the other thing about thisone y'all y'all like to eat
cheese together, right?
Y'all just sharing cheesetogether.
How about some provolone, like,oh, let me get some of that
(25:38):
mozzarella.
Oh, that cheddar was real good.
Y'all was just sharing cheese,a platter of cheese.
And she says she don't want totalk to you again.
You know why?
Because she knows in the backof her mind she owes you money.
Friends, girlfriends, cheeselovers all together.
You ain't getting this moneyback.
(25:58):
Player, you might as well kissit goodbye.
I know for a fact you ain'tgetting money.
It's just that's what happens.
Money and friends never mix.
Unfortunately, despite theconnection, the bond and
everything, money and friends,money and lovers don't mix.
It's sad, too, not happening.
That was short, easy andstraight to the point.
(26:21):
You ain't getting a dime back,homie nice, try next one from
demonic dream.
I, 30 year old female, don'tknow what to do after a fight
with my boyfriend, 48 oh 48 male, my boyfriend's 48 of six years
(26:43):
and I, 30, argue over somethingminor, but the situation
escalated quickly.
He closed all the doors, notlocking them, to prevent me from
leaving the house because Iwanted to get out of the
situation.
He spoke to me in anunacceptable tone, which
unfortunately happens far toooften when we argue.
The argument originally startedbecause our dog was excited to
see him ran through the flowerbed, cross the yard and back
(27:07):
into the house.
My boyfriend was extremelyupset, almost yelled at me.
I told him I would clean it up,even though nothing was
actually dirty.
First I wanted to finishpreparing our lunch.
When I turned around, heaccused me of rolling my eyes at
him and started throwingvarious accusations my way.
In response, I told him hecould make his own food and that
(27:27):
I was going to take the dog outfor a walk.
That's when the situationescalated.
He blocked my way.
I threatened to call my parentsif he didn't let me leave
immediately.
Maybe it wasn't entirely fair ofme to want to leave, but our
arguments never lead anywhere.
And last for hours.
He let me proceed.
I put the leash on the dog, butwhen I wanted to leave, he
(27:49):
closed all the doors again,grabbed me by the shoulder and
held me back.
I repeatedly told him to let mego until I ended up screaming
at him and somehow managed tofree myself from his grip.
I had to walk in the dog.
I packed my things, took my dogwith me and drove to a friend's
place.
I wasn't ready to talk to himbecause I didn't feel safe.
Since then, he's been texting me.
(28:09):
Some messages are full ofremorse, while others are calm
and objective.
He has apologized countlesstimes and begged me to come back
.
So far I haven't gone home.
Unfortunately, we argue a lotabout things.
He wants me to do more aroundthe house, work more, so that he
doesn't have to pay foreverything, even though I can't
(28:30):
work much due to health reasons.
Yet he also complains that whenthe house isn't clean enough.
On top of that, we have issueswith cheese from the very
beginning.
It's very important to him, butnot to to me, especially since
I experienced some abuse as achild.
We won't be able to find asolution for this problem and
I'm aware of the logicalconsequences, but at this point
(28:52):
I don't know what to do anymore.
Right now.
I want to go back.
I don't want to go back, butthe thought of breaking up with
him doesn't feel right either.
How do I deal with the best ofthe situation?
Cue the music, okay.
So flags have gone, or flags onthe field.
We have an 18 year.
18 year difference in age.
(29:14):
This is what I say.
If there's an actual adultbetween the age gaps, you're too
old or you're too young,depending on how you look at it.
There's a human between you.
You're 30, the man's 48.
You need to find someone yourage.
This is a lose-lose situation,because he feels that he has
(29:37):
power over you, and he does.
He's 18 years older than you.
He has experienced a wholebunch of life while you're still
experiencing life.
And I'm never a fan of animals.
If the animal can't stay in thecage and just be chill with it,
don't want it.
(29:58):
Cats, dogs, hamsters, no, no,no one.
I'm allergic to cats and dogsand their dander so I don't play
like that.
No dogs, no cats, no smoking.
Those are the things that areflags for me.
The way his mannerisms are toyou are in my advantage is his
(30:25):
advantage of life.
He has over you.
He grabbed you by the shoulder.
Things like that ain't part ofa relationship.
You know, anytime there isunnecessary physical interaction
, it needs to be looked at.
Grabbed you over the shoulder,didn't want you to leave.
All those type of things to meare flags on the field Penalties
(30:49):
.
You know those are things thatyou need to be looking at.
But it seemed like there wassome talking points.
If you've been together for sixyears and now you know you're
bringing up the, the abuse, thelactose intolerance, the cheese
abuse that you have andeverything, you've been together
six years, so what's going onwith that?
Again, there's only so much Ican read into Without knowing
(31:13):
everything.
So what should you do?
One, you should find you a man.
Your age, your age gap is toobig for me Personally.
Secondly, get rid of the dog.
That's what's causing theproblem, the dog.
It ain't the relationship, it'sthe daggone dog.
Get rid of it.
The final look, it's either youor the human, and you're
(31:33):
choosing the dog, apparently.
And maybe if you just finishthat sandwich he would have been
cool, but he might have beenreally hungry, don't know.
But yeah, I think you shouldfind somebody more your age and
go from there.
The last one of the day, thelast one of the day by oh yeah,
(31:57):
your nana, oh five, your nana,oh five says intimacy issues for
a male 32 and a female of 28.
How to fix this, they going tosay.
Me and my husband have beenmarried for five years.
We have a baby boy, two yearsold now.
Our intimacy was great before,but currently, for the past
(32:23):
months, the intimacy is gone.
I was initiating before and hedoesn't to me, so I got tired
and just stopped doing it.
Hugs, kisses, cuddles hedoesn't give me those needs
anymore.
He just uses his phone while wehave alone time together when
baby is asleep.
Question mark Same problem withour cheese life.
(32:45):
He also doesn't initiate andkeep on promising that, for
example, we would have cheesetonight.
Turns out it doesn't happen.
So my heart is broken by this.
I am so drained.
I don't feel loved and desiredand I feel insecure.
I'm so curious why he doesn'tlook for it or miss it.
It's been a month.
(33:05):
Sometimes we have cheese two tothree times a month, but the
quality of the cheese is verybad.
He won't play around.
He would just lay side by sidelast minutes and he's done.
I talked to him.
He said he's just tired at work.
I told him how can you be tired?
(33:26):
You only work half a day and noreasons after that.
I know he doesn't have anyother woman on the side, I'm
sure of it.
I feel so devastated now.
Please give me some advice.
I know you will say go tocounseling, but please give me
some advice.
Okay, cue the music.
Okay, say go to counseling, butplease give me some advice.
Okay, cutie music.
Okay.
So married for five years andgot the intimacy issues, he's
(33:49):
not even trying.
And having cheese side by side,that's that's all weird to me.
Is it weird to you guys?
Okay, so this is what you do.
This is what you do one night.
Go all out, 100 percent, the,the uh, negligee the, the
(34:13):
romantic mood, set the mood andeverything.
Get it all together to toevaluate his interests, right.
I mean, I'm talking about fromthe moment you guys wake up text
message pictures.
Just hype this man up, checkthe interests, like.
Check the interests.
If he's like, oh shoot, wehaving some cheese tonight Okay,
(34:36):
macaroni and cheese, that'swhat we talking about.
And if he doesn't match yourenergy, then you might need to.
You might you might need tolook something else.
If he.
My question is if he's workinghalf days, why is he so tired?
Like he shouldn't be that tired, he should be energized.
(34:57):
Especially if you set them uplike this, you set them up a
hundred percent.
It's like wait till you gethome tonight.
Or talk some crazy Like whenyou get home tonight.
Or talk some crazy like whenyou get home, boy, that cheese
is gonna be on a spread platterwith some ham.
That it was where.
That's how you're gonna piquethe interest for it.
If he's like, oh shoot, I'mready, I'm ready, then then it's
(35:22):
something wrong.
You just got to communicate,say, look, this is what I want,
blah, blah, blah and go on fromthere.
If he does not match your energy, I don't know.
I mean because y'all marriedand got a kid and two-year-old
kid and you said you said let mefind what he said.
One he said side by side.
(35:42):
That's crazy to me.
And then you said let me findwhat he said.
One he said side by side.
That's crazy to me.
And then you said hold on, letme read it.
He just uses his phone while wehave alone time together and
when the baby's sleeping.
What do you mean by that?
What do you mean?
He got his phone out.
That sounds weird.
Is he looking up cheese recipesonline?
That needs to be looked at,because that's not the same as
(36:08):
eating real cheese.
I'm just saying so yeah,evaluate the situation.
He needs to match your energyand quit the side-by-side.
Don't even.
That's weird.
We having cheese the regularway, we having cheese, no side
by side.
Who does that?
(36:28):
I don't like that idea.
That's terrible.
So there you go.
That is reddit on reddit.
These people are crazy, man.
I cannot fathom that some ofthis stuff is real.
I don't.
I don't believe it.
(36:48):
I believe some of it's real andsome of it's just stretched out
, pulled to the extreme.
But there you go.
Well, that is the show.
Thank you for tuning in.
I don't even know what to say,man.
People are crazy.
People are absolute crazy.
But continue to eat cheese, man, continue to eat that cheese.
(37:10):
I'm your host, michaelGillespie of the WDYM.
You guys have a great day.
I am out.
Girl Scout, boy Scout.
Peace out out.
you're listening to the wdym, the what do you mean?
Podcast, hamilton's number onepodcast.
Now sit back and relax.
Here's hamilton's own, michaelgillespie.
See, listening to the intro.
I never noticed how 80s theintro sounded.
(00:26):
That is circa 1985 type intromusic vibe.
You know I was like man.
I'm listening to the intro likeyo.
That sounds straight from the80s.
That's crazy to me.
But either way, I love it.
I love it.
I love it.
I love it.
(00:47):
Welcome to the WDYM podcast.
I'm your host, michaelGillespie.
Hope everybody's doing good.
Hope everybody is doing well.
Today's episode.
We're going a little old schoolas far as what we're doing today
.
We are doing a reddit on reddit.
I haven't done one this season.
(01:07):
I wanted to do one because ofthe effects of the crystal
classic that we just had.
Crystal classic is a sleepdepriving event that we have
here in Fairfield for show choir.
That requires almost 20, 29, 30, 31 hours of consistency,
(01:29):
staying on your feet, workingwith people, working with
schools and all that jazz.
Uh, just get off that.
Um, so, sleep deprived.
I'm like yo, I gotta do apodcast.
Keep the, keep it going, keepeverything moving, naturally,
and what other, what other thingto do than a Reddit on Reddit.
So, without further ado, I gotsix stories for you and we're
(01:52):
going to get straight into it.
With the first story titled,the first story from True
Concern 1219.
My wife, 34 female, is spiralingand I, 36 male, am tired of
covering for her.
I need her to get her weightunder control, but we've been
(02:13):
down this road before and italways eventually falls apart.
How can I help her See, I'mserious and salvage this Now.
This is a long read, so with me, here we go.
Before I start, I want to makeone thing clear I love my wife.
She's the mother of my twochildren.
She's intelligent, funny.
(02:34):
I've always been, and remain,attracted to her.
She's always been a heavier setwhen we first met.
I've never had a problem withthat, except in so far.
Now, again, as I read this iswhat I'm reading exactly word
for word from the reddit onreddit insofar as it affects our
(02:55):
family quality of life, I'llexplain below for some
background.
We have been married for nineyears and she has steadily,
steadily gained weight over thecourse of our marriage.
This was particularlyexaggerated by the difficult
pregnancy which was me, followedby covid, lockdowns and her
losing her long-term job.
Things continue to get out ofhand until early last year when
(03:18):
some incidents finally convincedher to see a doctor.
Get thing, get control ofthings.
Her weight was well over 500pounds and her doctor prescribed
some zeb bound and recommendedshe start seeing a therapist.
This worked fairly well for awhile, though she almost
immediately quit therapy and bythe end of the last summer by
the end of last summer she hadlost almost 20 pounds.
(03:41):
She had also generally improvedher outlook, gotten a part-time
job and was much moreattractive.
We love taking walks together.
Things took a turn for the worsein two, in two ways last fall.
First, my job switch insuranceplans, one that didn't cover glp
I don't know what that is, uh,glp minus ones for weight loss
(04:03):
and second, I can't rememberpathway pretty suddenly, which
caused a lot of grief and stress.
She was home from work forabout a month for one
bereavement after the passing,and at the same time her binge
eating, which had beensuppressed by Zip down, returned
with a fury.
This blend into the holidays,which are obviously not good for
(04:26):
anyone's waistline, and thisyear she basically fallen back
into her old habits.
I don't know her current weight, but she definitely gained it
back plus some.
That's where the advice portionstarts.
I've had started adjusting mylife in a lot of ways to
accommodate her limitations, andthe list grows longer each week
(04:47):
.
While no means exhaustive, thislist includes she is unable to
put her socks or shoes on ortrim her toenails on her own,
always need help getting up fromthe sofa, which is pretty low,
or playing with the kids toschool, despite working from
home myself, because she is toobig to safely fit behind the
(05:10):
wheel.
When friends invite us out,have to make excuses to cancel
plans and lie to them to avoidadmitting things like no, we
can't come out because she can'tstand up for too long.
Our social life is in a tank.
Our romantic life sucks.
Basically all dates are stay athome, take out and watch a
(05:30):
movie, because she gets soanxious about restaurants, can't
fit in movie theaters and can'tdo most things that involve
physical activity.
Most weekdays when she isn'tworking, she barely leaves bed,
leaving me to work full time andto do all the child care at the
same time.
Once they're home from school,grocery shopping is a nightmare
(05:50):
because she can't really staystanding up long enough.
But it's too proud to rollaround on one of those store
scooters, so she stays in thecar, calls me airpods and tells
me what to get, and if I refuseher anything, suddenly I'm being
manipulative or insulting herweight.
(06:12):
The whole thing makes me feellike a drug dealer or something.
Every week on sunday shebasically hypes herself up about
how this would be the week toturn everything around, but then
she never changes anything.
And if I remind her what shesaid and try to curb her eating
choices, I'm not being helpful.
(06:33):
I'm honestly getting real sickof all this and feel like feel
close to snapping.
To top everything off, my jobis partially funded by federal
grant money so, as of two weeksago, I'm unemployed and looking
for work.
I can't handle everything thatI'm being asked to do and the
stress is killing me to a point.
I frequently fantasize aboutrunning away just to book a
(06:54):
plane and leave her to deal withthings for a weekend.
I would never actually do that,but it makes you feel like a
terrible husband and father toeven have those thoughts.
I feel like I'm living infather to even have those
thoughts.
I feel like I'm living in aloop of broken promises and
plans every week.
I don't know how to get it tostick.
Obviously, I've been heavilyconsidering the health insurance
plan for whenever I look intowork next, as GLP-1s have been
(07:22):
the only thing that reallyhelped so far.
How can I show her how much I'mhurting without looking shallow
or selfish?
How can I get one of her dietattempts to stick?
While we wait for anotheropportunity to get the drugs
Weight loss drugs, to bespecific, for the foreseeable
(07:42):
future, I'm going to have to doextra because she can't
physically help right now with alot of things.
I a plan and an end in sight.
I'm gonna go nuts.
So true, concern.
1219 what in the world are yougonna do?
Okay, so here we go.
First, one of the day, trulyConcerned.
(08:05):
1219,.
You got yourself into this messwhen you married her and you
knew she was a little bit plussize.
Now, now you know that's plusplus size.
We talking 500 pounds, that's alot.
(08:25):
I mean anything with 500,.
If it's money, that sounds likea lot.
If it's Lego pieces, thatsounds like a lot.
500 miles, that like a lot.
500 miles, that's a lot.
So you knew what you weregetting into when you signed up
(08:45):
for it and now it seems likeshe's gotten used to a life
where she can dictate life toyou.
But again, you said some keythings that should be triggering
you, like marriage.
You are married.
Marriage for me is a joining oftwo people become one.
(09:08):
And right now it's 80 20, her.
She's up, you got your airpods,is shopping and she's telling
you what to get.
What is she saying?
Says okay, we're gonna call youTruth concern, get those
twinkies over there, Get themnow.
(09:29):
What is she saying in thoseairpods hey, you know those
ho-hos In the diet section, goahead, give me some of those.
At one point you have to lether know, like, look, this is
not what I signed up for.
I understand, you shouldunderstand.
(09:52):
In a marriage, things are goingto get big, get small, go up, go
down.
Marriage is a rollerco rollercoaster ups and downs and
everything.
This is part of part of theplan, but at some point you got
to put your foot down and standup.
There's certain things that shecan't.
She can't even put her shoes on, huh, and the thing that
(10:13):
concerns me the most, she saidyou, she can't even trim them
toenails.
Huh, if you're laying in bedand she turns over and swipe,
swipe, you could lose a legbecause toenails grow and now
those are strong.
So, my brother.
This is what you gotta do, one.
You have to force life into her.
You gotta go on walks.
(10:33):
You gotta get salads.
You gotta get vegetables.
You gotta get.
Don't you buy no pop.
Don't you bring no sugarythings in the house.
Don't you bring those chips inthe house.
You got to look.
I'm here to help you becauseyou need help, because you're my
significant other and I care,and I'm letting you know
(10:53):
straight up this is what's goingto happen.
We're going to take walks Threetimes a week, three times a day
, whatever you set, and when youget home you're gonna get us,
you're gonna get you a nicehealthy, hearty salad with
carrots and hype it up carrots,cucumbers, croutons, and that's
(11:16):
what we're eating.
And guess what?
We're gonna have the nice icescoldest water with a lemon in it
.
Right, start there, put yourfoot down and let the progress
show and you gotta, you gotta bestrong, you gotta be headstrong
when you do this, because a lotof people you can't change
people unless they see that youmean it right.
(11:38):
So, start like that, get thatgoing that way and don't don't
buckle.
Don't buckle because I, fromwhat I could tell, I mean I
can't really like her life willfall apart if you're not there.
But it seems like you want tobe there.
You know what I'm saying, butyou, you wrote the paragraph
that long, so it seems like youwant to be there.
(12:01):
You have to set those goals forher and for you and be there
for her.
That's the thing.
You have to do it that way.
Do that, give it 30 days andsee if she can get some progress
.
But you have to be firm withthat.
You have to be firm with that.
You have to be firm with that.
Good luck to you.
(12:22):
True concern 12, 19.
Boy, you said 500 pounds, bro.
There's nothing wrong.
There's nothing wrong withliking things big and stuff we
all like things.
Be big Mac.
We don't go toMcDonald'sdonald's for a little
mac or mac jr.
Wow, you know.
Hey, teach us on again.
(12:43):
I ain't judging, but I'll giveyou some advice the best way I
can.
Topic number two, byunaccomplished gear 736 I, 33,
female.
Caught my dad, 63, male,cheating question mark.
All right, here we go.
(13:04):
I went to my dad's house todaywhile his wife 58, and
half-sister, 23, were away on atrip.
I never had a mother, so he'sthe only parent I've ever had
question mark.
Now let me stop right there.
What?
Okay, I've always looked up tohim when I walk in.
(13:25):
A woman I've never seen beforewas lounging on the couch
wearing only an oversized shirt,which looked like his, with no
pants, casually dyeing her hair.
There were high heels tossed atthe entrance.
She didn't speak my language,stared at me in a in a halfway
that felt bold, like I was theone intruding in my own home.
I asked her who she was.
(13:48):
Instead of giving me a normalresponse, she dodged the
question and just said her namein english.
No explanation, no attempt atbasic manners.
My dad, who's 63, walked in afew minutes later and introduced
me to her in english, but shestill didn't acknowledge me
until he literally had to sayhello to get her to react.
Then she just got up barefootand walked to the bathroom like
(14:10):
he's, like she owned the place.
He even asked if she, if she,wanted him to help dye the back
of her hair.
I pulled him aside and askedDad, who is she?
He said a friend of a friend.
I asked what friend?
And he just threw out somerandom person's name, someone
none of us ever heard of.
When I asked why is she here, hegave me a half-assed story
(14:34):
about her being a refugee thatthis supposed friend asked him
to help.
Asked him straight up if she isa cheese worker Again, quick
pause and explanation.
This is a G show.
You won't have to substitutewhat the cheese really means.
But if you know the show andyou know Reddit on Reddit, you
know what cheese is.
(14:54):
And he laughed and said no way.
I asked so is she staying herebecause she has nowhere to go?
He immediately said no, no, no,nothing like that, just a favor
for a friend.
So then, why is she here?
But my dad has no connection torefugees, and definitely not to
young women like her.
And even if that was somewhattrue, why is she half naked in
(15:18):
our house, with freshly dyedhair?
To make things even weirder, hecalled me at 1130 pm last night
asking if I was still at thehouse.
I didn't think much about it atthe time, but now it's obvious
he was checking to make sure Iwasn't there.
The whole thing made me sickthe way she was so comfortable,
(15:38):
the way he talked to her and thefact that she looked my age or
younger.
When I left I said goodbye.
She didn't say anything back.
She sat there like I wasirrelevant.
I was so disgusted I texted mydad afterwards.
Tell your quote unquote friendthat his basic manners is to say
goodbye instead of ignoring me.
I called my half sister, who's23, because at first I thought
(16:02):
maybe it was one of her friends.
But when I described what I saw, she was just as shocked as I
was.
She had no idea who this womanwas.
We talked on the phone and Inearly cried.
We've always seen our dad as agood, humble man.
This is just horrifying.
For now I asked her not to sayanything to her mom until we
(16:24):
know more.
We don't know what to do.
I don't know how to even lookat him.
Now I really feel sad anddisgusted.
I guess I'm posting this justto get support and sympathy,
because I feel like the onlyparent I have is gone.
I feel so disgusted with himand wondering how to get past
this situation.
So accomplish gear 7, 3, 6.
(16:47):
I got a sound bite for you,ready, here you go.
My mom told me to tell you tomind your damn business.
Look here, your dad is 63.
I mean, from what you'retelling me, his wife is 58.
(17:09):
And your half-sister is 23.
Everybody is adults in thehouse, right?
Do you not think his wife knowssomething?
Or knows that this person is inthe house, or something like
that?
Do you really think your dad isout there running streets with
(17:30):
a young lady who's about yourage, at 33?
That's weird.
And for you to just be allheartbroken and, oh my dad, what
are you doing?
And here you go.
My mom told me to tell you, tomind your damn mind, he has
grown 63.
He's grown.
(17:51):
Leave him alone.
Listen, he is obligated.
He is married, 58-year-old wife, I mean you, 33-year-old female
.
Why are you all in your dad63-year-old?
Why are you in his business?
(18:12):
This, listen?
This is why you just need tochill and just let him handle
his his thing.
If, even if, he is playing likethat which he shouldn't, which
I doubt it.
I mean, come on, man, he's 63and you said she's your age or
younger, so let's just say,hypothetically, she's 30.
Ain't no 30 year old womanlooking for that, right?
(18:36):
I mean some things calledcommon sense, sense.
Common sense has got to comeinto this situation where you
know, you know you and you knowyour dad ain't playing this,
ain't doing this, right?
Plus, this is your dad, right.
So you should know your dadactions and behaviors because
he's your dad.
(18:57):
If your dad has no history ofdoing this, why is he doing it
now and again with someone whois basically the age of his
child?
You think you think he's doingsomething?
You think I don't think so.
I just think you need to mindyour business because,
especially you over his house, Ijust think you should mind your
business on that, on that one,I just think, I just think you,
(19:18):
you reaching your business onthat, on that one, I just think,
I just think you reaching, youreaching, you thinking, you
assuming, because mom and halfsister were gone, you think he
doing dirt guess what?
Not all men do dirt right.
And let alone, if he was doingdirt, why would your butt be
(19:39):
over there, would you think?
Would you think he'd be betterat this?
But maybe because he's 63, hethought he was, he was clear and
he could just do whatever.
I don't know.
I think you're reaching again.
Just mind your business, yourdad, your dad, old bro, just
just let it go like, like that.
You know, don't, don't, don'tassume that that's the case.
(20:04):
Next story by scrambled egg 02.
Here we go.
Scrambled egg 02.
How do I, female 22, enjoycheese with other people when my
ex who who was also male 22,was so much better.
I female 22, broke up with myex, male 22, almost two years
(20:28):
ago.
The cheese was so indescribablygood that I don't know that
anyone else will ever be able tolive up to it, that anyone else
will ever be able to live up toit.
It's always disappointing withother people, even ones that I
have deep emotional connections,dated one for a year and
(20:48):
genuinely really loved.
I generally think it's becauseof his girth.
I mean, I wasn't expecting thisone.
Generally think it's because ofhis baseball bat again, g-show,
and how, oh man, and how Ishould have reread this one.
I just looked at the top andread it and went from there
(21:12):
Start all over.
I generally think it's becauseof his baseball bat and how just
like strong he is.
So I got manhandled.
Not many other people could dothat manhandling part, but of
course can't change the baseballbat.
How can I get over it?
Is there something specific Ican do that will make it better
(21:37):
with other people, or did my exjust ruin cheese for me forever?
All right, scrambled egg Zerotwo.
We got some problems here, allright.
First off, you're 22.
Okay, you got time to get overthis, right?
(22:00):
So you can't.
You know, baseball bats arejust that baseball bats, it's
how you swing the bat.
Okay, you gotta let these, letthese men know how you like to
play baseball in g.
Show people.
(22:20):
I need you guys to think, I mean, there's nothing wrong with the
communication.
It sounds like a communicationissue with whoever you are
seeing and dating and stuff likethat Is cheese room for you.
You could be lactose intolerant, you could be, but you're not.
You just got used to somethingbecause you're 22.
(22:41):
You are young, you is a puppy.
You just started.
Don something because you're 22.
You are young, you is a puppy,you just started.
Don't do that to yourself.
What you got to do is one Maybethat's your type and you find
that similar type.
That's number one.
Two Let them know what you, thethings you like.
(23:03):
You ever play 20 questions.
Maybe you should do that.
Play some 20 questions and putout hints that, hey, you know I
like to play baseball from timeto time and you know that's what
you like, okay, and then, andthen normally normal guys go oh,
(23:24):
oh, really, okay, let me takesome notes.
There's nothing wrong withcommunicating what you like and
see if you can play baseballthat way and have cheese
together.
That's what you should do.
I think you should communicate,you know, find your type,
communicate that hey, this ishow you like to play baseball,
and wish you nothing but thebest.
(23:45):
I mean, there ain't reallynothing I could say about that.
It's just you're 22.
Quit, quit acting like life isover because you've had things
one way.
There's multiple ways to crackan egg, scrambled egg, old too.
You see what I did there.
So, yes, communicate and findwhat you like.
I mean, that's basically how itgoes to, and if you can't find
(24:06):
it, keep searching.
You are 22, you are a puppy.
You will find what you want.
Next, my 20 year old, 24 yearold male ex, 21 year old female
owes me money, but we haven'tspoken over a month.
How do I get it back?
This is from thick distributionfor a six.
(24:28):
My ex was in bad debt over fourmonths ago.
I decided to pay it off for herand she said I'll pay it back
to you Once I have enough.
The last time we spoke aboutmoney, she said she was 1500 in
debt and that was two months ago.
We broke up since and ended onbad terms.
She says she didn't want totalk to me again and we haven't
(24:51):
contacted in over a month.
I'm currently in a financialsituation and you need your
money back, but it seems like Iwon't be getting it back.
How would I go about it?
At least asking for it'spossible for her to pay me back.
Well, this is this is gonna beshort you ain't getting your
money back.
You guys ended on bad terms andyou haven't talked in over a
(25:15):
month.
You know the funny thing aboutmoney and friends because I know
about this experience itdoesn't go well.
It doesn't blend well at all.
No, despite, despite how longthe friendship is.
And the other thing about thisone y'all y'all like to eat
cheese together, right?
Y'all just sharing cheesetogether.
How about some provolone, like,oh, let me get some of that
(25:38):
mozzarella.
Oh, that cheddar was real good.
Y'all was just sharing cheese,a platter of cheese.
And she says she don't want totalk to you again.
You know why?
Because she knows in the backof her mind she owes you money.
Friends, girlfriends, cheeselovers all together.
You ain't getting this moneyback.
(25:58):
Player, you might as well kissit goodbye.
I know for a fact you ain'tgetting money.
It's just that's what happens.
Money and friends never mix.
Unfortunately, despite theconnection, the bond and
everything, money and friends,money and lovers don't mix.
It's sad, too, not happening.
That was short, easy andstraight to the point.
(26:21):
You ain't getting a dime back,homie nice, try next one from
demonic dream.
I, 30 year old female, don'tknow what to do after a fight
with my boyfriend, 48 oh 48 male, my boyfriend's 48 of six years
(26:43):
and I, 30, argue over somethingminor, but the situation
escalated quickly.
He closed all the doors, notlocking them, to prevent me from
leaving the house because Iwanted to get out of the
situation.
He spoke to me in anunacceptable tone, which
unfortunately happens far toooften when we argue.
The argument originally startedbecause our dog was excited to
see him ran through the flowerbed, cross the yard and back
(27:07):
into the house.
My boyfriend was extremelyupset, almost yelled at me.
I told him I would clean it up,even though nothing was
actually dirty.
First I wanted to finishpreparing our lunch.
When I turned around, heaccused me of rolling my eyes at
him and started throwingvarious accusations my way.
In response, I told him hecould make his own food and that
(27:27):
I was going to take the dog outfor a walk.
That's when the situationescalated.
He blocked my way.
I threatened to call my parentsif he didn't let me leave
immediately.
Maybe it wasn't entirely fair ofme to want to leave, but our
arguments never lead anywhere.
And last for hours.
He let me proceed.
I put the leash on the dog, butwhen I wanted to leave, he
(27:49):
closed all the doors again,grabbed me by the shoulder and
held me back.
I repeatedly told him to let mego until I ended up screaming
at him and somehow managed tofree myself from his grip.
I had to walk in the dog.
I packed my things, took my dogwith me and drove to a friend's
place.
I wasn't ready to talk to himbecause I didn't feel safe.
Since then, he's been texting me.
(28:09):
Some messages are full ofremorse, while others are calm
and objective.
He has apologized countlesstimes and begged me to come back
.
So far I haven't gone home.
Unfortunately, we argue a lotabout things.
He wants me to do more aroundthe house, work more, so that he
doesn't have to pay foreverything, even though I can't
(28:30):
work much due to health reasons.
Yet he also complains that whenthe house isn't clean enough.
On top of that, we have issueswith cheese from the very
beginning.
It's very important to him, butnot to to me, especially since
I experienced some abuse as achild.
We won't be able to find asolution for this problem and
I'm aware of the logicalconsequences, but at this point
(28:52):
I don't know what to do anymore.
Right now.
I want to go back.
I don't want to go back, butthe thought of breaking up with
him doesn't feel right either.
How do I deal with the best ofthe situation?
Cue the music, okay.
So flags have gone, or flags onthe field.
We have an 18 year.
18 year difference in age.
(29:14):
This is what I say.
If there's an actual adultbetween the age gaps, you're too
old or you're too young,depending on how you look at it.
There's a human between you.
You're 30, the man's 48.
You need to find someone yourage.
This is a lose-lose situation,because he feels that he has
(29:37):
power over you, and he does.
He's 18 years older than you.
He has experienced a wholebunch of life while you're still
experiencing life.
And I'm never a fan of animals.
If the animal can't stay in thecage and just be chill with it,
don't want it.
(29:58):
Cats, dogs, hamsters, no, no,no one.
I'm allergic to cats and dogsand their dander so I don't play
like that.
No dogs, no cats, no smoking.
Those are the things that areflags for me.
The way his mannerisms are toyou are in my advantage is his
(30:25):
advantage of life.
He has over you.
He grabbed you by the shoulder.
Things like that ain't part ofa relationship.
You know, anytime there isunnecessary physical interaction
, it needs to be looked at.
Grabbed you over the shoulder,didn't want you to leave.
All those type of things to meare flags on the field Penalties
(30:49):
.
You know those are things thatyou need to be looking at.
But it seemed like there wassome talking points.
If you've been together for sixyears and now you know you're
bringing up the, the abuse, thelactose intolerance, the cheese
abuse that you have andeverything, you've been together
six years, so what's going onwith that?
Again, there's only so much Ican read into Without knowing
(31:13):
everything.
So what should you do?
One, you should find you a man.
Your age, your age gap is toobig for me Personally.
Secondly, get rid of the dog.
That's what's causing theproblem, the dog.
It ain't the relationship, it'sthe daggone dog.
Get rid of it.
The final look, it's either youor the human, and you're
(31:33):
choosing the dog, apparently.
And maybe if you just finishthat sandwich he would have been
cool, but he might have beenreally hungry, don't know.
But yeah, I think you shouldfind somebody more your age and
go from there.
The last one of the day, thelast one of the day by oh yeah,
(31:57):
your nana, oh five, your nana,oh five says intimacy issues for
a male 32 and a female of 28.
How to fix this, they going tosay.
Me and my husband have beenmarried for five years.
We have a baby boy, two yearsold now.
Our intimacy was great before,but currently, for the past
(32:23):
months, the intimacy is gone.
I was initiating before and hedoesn't to me, so I got tired
and just stopped doing it.
Hugs, kisses, cuddles hedoesn't give me those needs
anymore.
He just uses his phone while wehave alone time together when
baby is asleep.
Question mark Same problem withour cheese life.
(32:45):
He also doesn't initiate andkeep on promising that, for
example, we would have cheesetonight.
Turns out it doesn't happen.
So my heart is broken by this.
I am so drained.
I don't feel loved and desiredand I feel insecure.
I'm so curious why he doesn'tlook for it or miss it.
It's been a month.
(33:05):
Sometimes we have cheese two tothree times a month, but the
quality of the cheese is verybad.
He won't play around.
He would just lay side by sidelast minutes and he's done.
I talked to him.
He said he's just tired at work.
I told him how can you be tired?
(33:26):
You only work half a day and noreasons after that.
I know he doesn't have anyother woman on the side, I'm
sure of it.
I feel so devastated now.
Please give me some advice.
I know you will say go tocounseling, but please give me
some advice.
Okay, cue the music.
Okay, say go to counseling, butplease give me some advice.
Okay, cutie music.
Okay.
So married for five years andgot the intimacy issues, he's
(33:49):
not even trying.
And having cheese side by side,that's that's all weird to me.
Is it weird to you guys?
Okay, so this is what you do.
This is what you do one night.
Go all out, 100 percent, the,the uh, negligee the, the
(34:13):
romantic mood, set the mood andeverything.
Get it all together to toevaluate his interests, right.
I mean, I'm talking about fromthe moment you guys wake up text
message pictures.
Just hype this man up, checkthe interests, like.
Check the interests.
If he's like, oh shoot, wehaving some cheese tonight Okay,
(34:36):
macaroni and cheese, that'swhat we talking about.
And if he doesn't match yourenergy, then you might need to.
You might you might need tolook something else.
If he.
My question is if he's workinghalf days, why is he so tired?
Like he shouldn't be that tired, he should be energized.
(34:57):
Especially if you set them uplike this, you set them up a
hundred percent.
It's like wait till you gethome tonight.
Or talk some crazy Like whenyou get home tonight.
Or talk some crazy like whenyou get home, boy, that cheese
is gonna be on a spread platterwith some ham.
That it was where.
That's how you're gonna piquethe interest for it.
If he's like, oh shoot, I'mready, I'm ready, then then it's
(35:22):
something wrong.
You just got to communicate,say, look, this is what I want,
blah, blah, blah and go on fromthere.
If he does not match your energy, I don't know.
I mean because y'all marriedand got a kid and two-year-old
kid and you said you said let mefind what he said.
One he said side by side.
(35:42):
That's crazy to me.
And then you said let me findwhat he said.
One he said side by side.
That's crazy to me.
And then you said hold on, letme read it.
He just uses his phone while wehave alone time together and
when the baby's sleeping.
What do you mean by that?
What do you mean?
He got his phone out.
That sounds weird.
Is he looking up cheese recipesonline?
That needs to be looked at,because that's not the same as
(36:08):
eating real cheese.
I'm just saying so yeah,evaluate the situation.
He needs to match your energyand quit the side-by-side.
Don't even.
That's weird.
We having cheese the regularway, we having cheese, no side
by side.
Who does that?
(36:28):
I don't like that idea.
That's terrible.
So there you go.
That is reddit on reddit.
These people are crazy, man.
I cannot fathom that some ofthis stuff is real.
I don't.
I don't believe it.
(36:48):
I believe some of it's real andsome of it's just stretched out
, pulled to the extreme.
But there you go.
Well, that is the show.
Thank you for tuning in.
I don't even know what to say,man.
People are crazy.
People are absolute crazy.
But continue to eat cheese, man, continue to eat that cheese.
(37:10):
I'm your host, michaelGillespie of the WDYM.
You guys have a great day.
I am out.
Girl Scout, boy Scout.
Peace out out.
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