The Wicker Man (1973)

Episode Transcript
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SPEAKER_02 (00:03):
Hello and welcome to the We Recommend Podcast, a
movie podcast where every weekwe recommend a movie for you to
watch, and then come back hereand listen to us discuss.
I'm Jesse.
I'm Jason.
Do sit down, Sergeant.
Shocks are so much betterabsorbed with the knees bent,
cause this week we recommend theWicker Man.

SPEAKER_01 (00:27):
1979?
Three.
Three.
Yeah.
I thought you were gonna go withthe other Lord Summer Isle
quote.
Which one?
There's so many good ones.
Well, it's the one where he'slike, get that ring of power.
Yeah.
Get those filthy hobbits.

SPEAKER_02 (00:43):
Is that what you think these British people
sounded like?
Yes, well.
Sling blade?
You know what I like?
What I'm breastfeeding, a littleegg.
Well, there's an egg, there's abird, and a feather, and a man.
Yeah, I buried my grandma theother day in the backyard.
Instead of putting her body inthere, put a rabbit.

(01:07):
Threw in some French friestaters just for her.
Yes, this movie rules.
This is a masterpiece.
I love this movie.
Yeah, I knew it.
When I was watching it, I waslike, I bet Jason's just like to
every song.
Just like that one song at thebeginning where it just
constantly is saying just sayingbarley like free to barley.
Yeah.
Whatever that means.
And then just says it in adifferent way the next line.

(01:28):
It's great.
I was thinking, my firstquestion was, what do you think
of the film?

SPEAKER_01 (01:32):
So it was so good.
And the uh about the music, itmade everything so just comical,
kind of in a way.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (01:43):
Because at first, you know, it's all weird, and
we're supposed to think it'sweird because they're like, oh,
we're not doing Christianbeliefs, they're doing weird
things, and everything's kind ofabout sex in life, you know?
And then it's just like it'slike, okay.
I love the I want thesoundtrack.
It's so strange.
I it's it's such a great, it'slike the ultimate folk horror

(02:06):
movie.
God, I kicked ass.
And it's not even a horror movietill the last like five minutes.
And then it's like, oh shit,that would suck.
Which I wanted to say.
Do you do you find the filmscary?
No.
At any point until maybe theend?
No, I just it was so good.
Yeah.
Do you like the ending?
Yeah.
It's pretty.

(02:27):
Pretty metal or didn't have topunch a woman.
He didn't have to punch a woman.
That was great.
Like, that's the thing.
With the the wicker man, theNick Cage one, you like you get
why he's punching women, right?
It's like everybody's so fuckingfrustrating.
And he's all pent up with, youknow, like he hasn't, you know,
I'm assuming, ever, you know,came, come.

(02:50):
I don't think he's ever comebefore.
So, you know, he's probably gotall that built up in him, just
like, I'm ready to shoot a wad.
Is he a virgin in that movietoo?
Oh, I don't remember.
But like just comparing it tothis movie, right?
There's so many points that wereif you were in his shoes, he'd
be like, all right, y'all killhim.
I'm about to start punching ifyou don't start answering
questions, all right?
Because they're all kind of likea little snooty too.

SPEAKER_01 (03:10):
Not one of these ladies deserved to be punched.
Yeah, no, no.

SPEAKER_02 (03:13):
Yeah, they're also sweet.
I think the film does I wonderhow this film was uh perceived
as when it first came out.
And I know that it wasn't um itdidn't make like any money.
It seemed like the producersdidn't like it.
They tried to barrow it bury it.
It like Christopher Lee had touse his own money to go out and

(03:34):
uh advertise for this movie andstuff like that.
So it did make like I'm justwondering for the people who did
watch it, did they think like,hell yeah, this was good, or did
they perceive it as more likeanti-Christian or more
anti-pagan?
Because when I was watchingthis, for the most part, I was
never on his side, Howie's side.

(03:55):
I'm like, dude, this ain't yourland, brother.
Like, you're just walking inthere, I'm a cop, I can do
whatever I want.
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
And like the whole time, I'mlike, dude, shut up.
You suck.
But then at the end, I'm like, Idon't know.
He might actually have been inthe right the whole time.

SPEAKER_00 (04:11):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (04:12):
Because they never killed anybody.
So for him.
Until the end with him.
Seemed like all the deaths were,you know, just animal sacrifices
and stuff like that.

SPEAKER_01 (04:20):
Goofballs.
Bunch of tricksy goofballs.

SPEAKER_02 (04:23):
And it's just like, I don't know.
I mean, they seem like prettychill and they're having a good
time.
Like, I don't know.
Leave them to this island, letthem be.

SPEAKER_01 (04:29):
Yeah.
They literally haven't hurtanybody.

SPEAKER_02 (04:32):
Yeah.
Until you, you asshole.
Though as we find out, you know,they manipulated him the whole
time throughout the whole movie.
So to get him to that point,yeah.
It's pretty cool.
Pretty great.
They didn't then they neverbroke any laws.
Yeah.
I was just until the end.
I just when I watched it, I waslike, is this because I feel
like there is a like I wonderwhat the motives of the
filmmaker was.

SPEAKER_01 (04:55):
Well, and I think it's it's kind of the same as
like Midsummer um Summer Al.
Well no, the the sum the themovie Midsummer.
Oh, Midsummer.
Midsummer.
It's kind of like that.

SPEAKER_02 (05:10):
I mean Yeah, where it's like you're just kind of
the same movie.
Oh yeah.
Midsummer just took a lot fromthe wicker man.
Yeah.
Yeah, for sure.
I mean, I just thought it was anamazing idea.
Yeah.
It really makes me just want tobe like pagan for a little bit.
A little bit.
Just hang out on this.
I like their way of it.
As long as it's a nice isle,nice warm island all year round.

(05:30):
Just don't have a hot daughter.
That's weird.
Yeah, sure.
You just have.
But I mean, I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 (05:35):
Everybody sings about her.

SPEAKER_02 (05:37):
And they're but I guess you're in that era.
It's like, I don't know, she cando whatever.
Yeah, pretty cool, I guess.
They're all just gonna like humpand stuff and party.
Like where I was the most likehating Howie in this movie is
when like they're all just kindof partying in the bar, and he's
like, Do you have a license todo all this?
And it's like, shut up, it's anisland, nobody's complaining.

(05:59):
Everybody's having fun, but youHowie.
You don't like this becauseyou're like, you have all this
pent-up Christian guilt insideyou, and you want everybody to
do exactly what you want.
Which is like what the movie is.
It's like you're going to it's aman going to the others.
Who are the others?
What do they do?
It's very much like that, whichis in a lot of they do a lot of

(06:21):
fun shit.
Yeah.
And then like, if you'reunlucky, you might be the one
guy.

SPEAKER_01 (06:26):
Have you ever jumped across naked or fire naked?
No.
I have.
And it is a free.
Did you really?
Is it a free is a free moment.

SPEAKER_02 (06:34):
I was gonna say hang pretty.
Is that it's like, ah, you don'treally want to shave on them, so
you just jump over fire and burnoff a little bit.
Same.
Um so would you consider thisthe best folk horror movie ever?

SPEAKER_01 (06:48):
No.
But it was really good.
Yeah, yeah, it was great.
I feel like a good folk horroris actually scary.
I just I don't know, with allthe whimsical music and stuff,
it's just like there's no waymaybe they thought it was scary
in the 70s because it wasdifferent.

SPEAKER_02 (07:05):
That's that's exactly what I think it is.
Like compared to like what youknow, like Christian beliefs and
stuff.
This is like appalling.
Kids learning about penises.
Might as well teach them.
They're gonna be wanting to usethem very soon.
It's funny, like how this moviecan just like you know, this
movie's still pretty relevant,you know.

(07:27):
Summer uh Summer's Isle Manor isfucking awesome.
I know it's just like a giantcastle, it's so good.
Whenever they walked up to it,and then they go inside and it's
all nice and fancy, and there'stwo little pictures, one of some
tomatoes, yeah, just like just alittle Polaroid of tomatoes and
some onions.
And I'm like, those two picturesdon't belong in this castle.

(07:47):
I just assume Lord Summer SummerIsle is just like, this is my
favorite two pictures I've evertaken.

SPEAKER_01 (07:53):
I get so hungry.
Look at these.
It's like they went to a thriftstore and bought all the old
paintings and just put them upin a uh house.

SPEAKER_02 (08:00):
Yeah.
Some of my favorite stuff inthis is just when someone there
says something or how he seessomething, and just his face and
just how he's just becausethroughout the film getting more
and like God's is like Hankheel.
Oh just like more and moreexcept until the point where

(08:22):
he's angry.

SPEAKER_01 (08:23):
Um so um you weren't my son, I'd hug you.

SPEAKER_02 (08:28):
Well, I guess I already answered this, but I was
gonna ask, like, pagan orChristianity, which one do you
choose in this movie?
Kidding?
Yeah, because with the paganreligion, when the girl's just
like banging on your wall naked,dancing against it.

SPEAKER_01 (08:43):
Hey, come to my room.

SPEAKER_02 (08:44):
Yeah, it's just like you can just be like, I'm pagan,
okay.
Versus Christianity, you gottawhip yourself on the back 500
times, just be like, get thedemons out.

SPEAKER_01 (08:55):
Yeah, she put a spell on that dude.
Yeah.
It makes you think of this isthe real hocus pocus.
Yeah.
This is the better hocus pocus.

SPEAKER_02 (09:04):
Hocus focus.
Wiggle spell on him.
Yeah.
Right through the wall.
Something I really like isthere's so much directly looking
at the camera in this moviebecause of like POV shots and
stuff.
Especially towards the end whenhe's going to like business to
business to look around, there'slike the bread busting in
people's homes.
Bread man coffin thing.

(09:26):
Yeah.
And like they're all showing offtheir little costume, and it's
just like you're showing itstraight to the camera.
Like, that's when it all startsgetting pretty eerie.
And I will say, like, all theirmasks and stuff are kind of
creepy because they're, youknow, low uh, I don't know, not
low rent, but you know, they'relike handmade, so it's kind of
creepy.
Some of the fresh ones were likereally really.

(09:47):
My favorite was the Buffalo Headone.
Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (09:49):
That one was rude.
And I think some of these aresome of this shit is actually
real to this island, isn't it?
Because they in the beginning ofthe movie, it's like thanks to
the people of Summers Isle forletting us in on your like
religion and shit.

SPEAKER_02 (10:03):
Yeah, I don't know if they filmed it directly.
I mean, not filmed it there.
But yeah, they get they got alot, I mean they did some
research.

SPEAKER_01 (10:09):
I feel like some of the people at the end, like
there was some people showingoff their masks.
I feel like those are realaspects.

SPEAKER_02 (10:16):
And I was like, this there's something there, it made
it kind of eerie because I waslike, are these people in the
film?
Like, this should happen.
Like what's happening.
If it does, I want to go.
I'm sure they didn't do thesacrifices.
I mean, at some point, I'm sureback way back in the day, people
did sacrifices.

SPEAKER_01 (10:31):
You think they have like a roped-off area for
banging on outside?
Like outside.

SPEAKER_02 (10:35):
It didn't seem like it mattered where you were.
If you got a bang, you gottabang.

SPEAKER_01 (10:39):
Yeah, I know, but like you have like one area
that's like keep out the grass,and then the other one's like
get it on.

SPEAKER_02 (10:46):
Stop having sex there.
This is the good grass.
Go over here.

SPEAKER_01 (10:49):
Move two yards over here.
This is the sex grass.

SPEAKER_02 (10:53):
It's all lubed up, it's all so can't even cut it
because there's so much lube.

SPEAKER_01 (10:58):
Guts of a mower.

SPEAKER_02 (11:02):
All right, so some of the facts.
Um Christopher Lee said that heconsiders this to be his
greatest role ever.
That's amazing.
Yeah, he's like, you know what,got to dress up as a woman,
dance in the streets.
But like, for real though, theperformances in this movie,
especially with Christopher Leeand um shit, forgot his name,
Edward Woodard?
Woodward?

(11:22):
Perfect.
Which one's Edward Wood uhHowie?
Howie, okay.
Yeah, the the two the two, Iguess, main leads are great.
They're so good.
And that teacher.
I thought everybody was reallygood.

SPEAKER_01 (11:32):
I mean, it's wild.
Except for the only the onlytime I had a questioning about
the actors was the verybeginning when he rolls up in
the plane and talking to the oldguys.
Oh, we're right and they're allsmiling at each other, like,
we're on camera.

SPEAKER_02 (11:44):
This is but I think you could look at it, especially
once you get to the end, you canlook at it as like, oh, they're
all like shit in grins becausethey're like, We're gonna burn
you alive, bro.

SPEAKER_01 (11:54):
Oh, that's true.

SPEAKER_02 (11:55):
I love those guys, though.
They're just like, can't behere, dude.
And they're all like, Wow, wedon't know her, we don't know
her.
This is I don't know.
I love those guys.
So director Robin Hardyexplained the meaning of the
scene with the woman with an eggin her hand nursing a baby while
sitting in a graveyard to AlanCumming in Scotland on screen.
Wearing to Hardy is a fertilityritual that she was hoping for

(12:18):
another baby.
No, but she already has one.
So this movie, um yeah, so thereis no like official version of
this movie that the director isa hundred percent like okay
with.
So this the version we watch wasthe theatrical release, but
there is a director's cut that's99 minutes, and there's a final

(12:38):
cut that's 94 minutes.

SPEAKER_01 (12:40):
Um, and I guess like extra five minutes, like mostly
egg-based.
I don't know what those are.

SPEAKER_02 (12:46):
I kind of looked up like a lot of the scenes and
it's just a lot of little extrascenes.
I guess the 94-minute version issupposed to be the best version.
It was hard because I keptseeing people just watch
theatrical, it's bit the best.
So it's one of those movieswhere it seems like the director
didn't get to really make themovie he 100% wanted to make.
Um because there is there'ssupposed to be more to that

(13:07):
scene where she scrap smashesthe egg with her hand while
breastfeeding.
Yes.
Um, so as filming occurredbetween October and November,
there were no trees in blossom.
The trees in the scene with thepregnant woman had to be brought
in and were all handmade.
Edward Wood or Woodward admittedone of the memories of filming

(13:29):
that stuck out in his mind waswatching the trees being brought
in on the back of a truck as hehad never seen anything like it.
So yeah.
Um, and there was like, I guess,another point where they had to
film in a different locationbecause they're like, well, we
can either film in anotherlocation or handmake trees and
like put glue blossoms and stuffon them because they're kind of

(13:50):
running out of budget.
And it's just like they filmedat the worst possible time.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (13:55):
It was taking them forever.

SPEAKER_02 (13:56):
Um, and I guess the concept of the wicker man
derives from the single sentencein the It's uh, you know, it's
uh Julius Caesar esque word, butit comes out to be commentaries
on the Gaelic War by JuliusCaesar Caesar.
He claimed that the druids ofthe Gauls built effigies out of
sticks and placed living meninside, then set them on fire to

(14:18):
pay tribute to gods.
Caesar also claims that the menchosen uh were typically
criminals or slaves.
Modern historians have not beenable to verify Caesar's account,
and its veracity has beenquestioned.
So, you know, like all this hasjust been like it's actually
kind of just made up, I guess.
Julius Caesar was like, we hatepagans, let's make them look
crazy.

SPEAKER_01 (14:38):
Well, I don't know.
I mean, I guess I can imaginehim seeing this and then making
it like his own opinions aboutit, but like I can't believe
that anyone put inside of thatthing was super happy about it.
Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (14:52):
Unless they're like completely brainwashed by their
religion.

SPEAKER_00 (14:55):
Couldn't he just punch out of it?

SPEAKER_02 (14:58):
Yes.
When I saw that door and I waslike, hey, kick, have you ever
thought about kicking that doormade of sticks open?
You ever think of that?
Howie he could have fought a lotharder.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (15:11):
He didn't fight pretty much.

SPEAKER_02 (15:13):
Um, this one's kind of funny.
Um, so in a 2008 interview,director Robin Hardy said it
wasn't Jane Jackson or LorrainePeters, um, who they filmed nude
for the from the back duringBrit Eklund's infamous naked
dance scene.
Hell yeah.
Since Eklund appeared toplessbut did not want to show her

(15:34):
rear.
It was a stripper he hired inGlasgow, Scotland that vaguely
resembled resembled Eklund.
He said, We had to find someonerather quickly.
The girl we found in a club waspromised back the next day to uh
to the place where she wasperforming.
To my distress, I discovered shewas still with the crew having a
good time two weeks later.
Eklund said in an interview onBBC One's Friday night with

(15:56):
Jonathan Ross that that's thestory she heard too.
I didn't want to show my bottom,but I shot myself in the foot.
They put in the ugliest, biggestbottom in the world.
Mine was much smaller and muchnicer.
I recently found out it was astripper from Glassgloe.
Eklund said she was less thanpleased with her body double and
wished she had felt confidentenough to bear all she can find,

(16:19):
confirmed that she was pregnantduring the shoot with a son,
Nikolai, but deniedlong-standing rumors that this
was the real reason she refusedto strip, claiming she did not
know she was pregnant at thetime.
I'm just like, it's funnybecause you know, when I read
that and then I was just kind ofwatching as I was looking for
notes or uh facts, and I waslike, but it doesn't look that
ugly.

SPEAKER_01 (16:38):
She's not big.
What are you talking about?
The the concept of beauty in the70s is insane.

SPEAKER_02 (16:43):
She's she almost looks exactly like your size,
except maybe a little biggerdown below.
I didn't notice.
Yeah, I didn't either.
I was like, I I've seen thismovie four or five times.
I've never noticed that was abody double.
Now watching it, you can tell byher hair more than you can tell
by her butt.
Yeah, I guess.

SPEAKER_01 (16:59):
I thought it was fine.

SPEAKER_02 (17:00):
It's a great butt.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (17:02):
Totally fine, butt.
Yeah.
I wish I had that.

SPEAKER_02 (17:03):
Stripper from Glasglow.
Glasgow?
Glow?
Glasgow.

SPEAKER_01 (17:07):
Yeah, you know, she's like 80 now.

SPEAKER_02 (17:08):
Did a great job, lady.
Yeah, you you danced againstthat wall the best you could
have.
We all appreciate your service.
So uh Sir Christopher Leed paidhis own press tour out of his
own pocket, and he hit everystop in the U.S.
willing to interview him aboutthe movie.
According to a rumor, somefarmers in Iowa were surprised
to see him on live early morningpublic access shows because

(17:30):
that's how much he loved thismovie and wanted to get it out.
Wow.
Because he just wanted everybodyto see it, and nobody saw it.
Yeah, because it's like, dude,you got lost.
It's just corn there, man.

SPEAKER_01 (17:44):
I bet those farmers were real excited to see someone
they didn't.

SPEAKER_02 (17:48):
Jesus Christ, Dracula's here.

SPEAKER_01 (17:51):
That's right.

SPEAKER_02 (17:52):
Everybody gets Dracula.
People walking with their littlepitchforks and fire.
Um like, get rid of thosesidebirds, and we're gonna burn
this building too.
So the current version availablein the US and UK is still
incomplete, despite itsdirector's cut status, still
missing, is a lengthy speechmade by Lord Summer Isle on

(18:12):
apples.
There's a lot more speechesabout and fruit.
Yeah.
Um, so it is rumored that theoriginal negative, the
full-length uh version was usedas landfill in the construction
of the M3 motorway in England.
Sir Christopher Lee said thatthis was apparently done on
purpose because Michael Dealey'sdislike of the movie.

(18:33):
Uh the negative and the outtakesof this movie were stored in a
vault at Shepperton Studiosafter the company was purchased
by new owners.
They ordered the vault to becleared of all old material.
The vault manager accidentallyput the negatives which just
arrived from the live lab withthe ones that were to be
destroyed.
Yeah, I'm sure.
That's why there's so much ofthis movie where it's just like,
I think there's more.

(18:53):
But some people go up.
Some people say that the um likethe longer versions are like it
makes him stay there longer forlike an extra day, and it's just
like it feels tighter and kindof more complete.
Like May 2nd?
Yeah, it's like as like eightwell, no, I guess it's just like
he's just there a little bitlonger.
Um, and some people say it'sactually kind of better and it

(19:15):
doesn't make it it doesn't makeit any better to be longer.
So that's what I really likedabout this movie.
I was like, this is like aperfect 89-minute movie.

SPEAKER_01 (19:23):
Yeah, it was awesome.

SPEAKER_02 (19:24):
It's like wow, you got everything across pretty
well with just like four or fiveconversations, really.
I I see no need that.
And then one research thing.

SPEAKER_01 (19:31):
Commentary on apples for God's sakes.

SPEAKER_02 (19:34):
And I love that this kind of this movie kind of fits
with a lot of the movies we didthis week where it's like
someone's investigatingsomething and then there's a
cult.

SPEAKER_01 (19:41):
You know what's awesome about apples?
So it's apples.

SPEAKER_02 (19:45):
That's actually my favorite way to start a
conversation.
You know what somethinginteresting about apples?

SPEAKER_01 (19:51):
Always thought, always wondered.
My brother-in-law brought ussome apples from Vermont because
it's apple picking season, andlike they're just flowing out
the ears with apples up there.
Yeah, and they're the bestgoddamn apples I've ever had in
my fucking life.

SPEAKER_03 (20:05):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (20:06):
And they're gone now.
I should have brought you one.
Yeah, that'd be great.
I don't think about otherpeople.
Yeah, that makes sense.
Uh they're just so delicious.

SPEAKER_02 (20:14):
I've never had an apple just like right off a
tree, have you?
Yes.
Are they good?
Yeah, that's what I'm talkingabout.
I would love to have these areright off the tree apples.
Like, I like mine to just stayin like Walmart for 20 to 30
days.

SPEAKER_01 (20:25):
Every other apple in the world is bullshit now.
I I I'd compare every apple tothe good ones, to the Vermont
apples.
Yes.

SPEAKER_02 (20:33):
This is not to Vermont apples.
Get the dad in my face.
This is an ad for Vermont.
I only like Vermont.

SPEAKER_01 (20:40):
Me and Bernie Sanders went apple picking.
It was amazing.
You had to like put them on yourshoulders.
Like the guy at the bar.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (20:49):
She's got like a cop from Brittany just be like, oh,
I hate this shit.
How dare he be on his shoulders?
How dare they I sing and have agood time.
So uh this is a little bit abouta sequel that was written.
So it never came to be.
In 1989, it's called BurningMan.
Yeah.
Screenwriter Anthony Schaeferwrote a 30-page script treatment

(21:11):
titled The Loathsome LambtonWorm, a direct sequel to this
movie.
For producer Lance W.
Reynolds.

SPEAKER_00 (21:19):
First of all, that name sucks.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (21:22):
It would have been a more fantastical in its subject
matter than this movie andrelied more heavily on visual
effects.
In this continuation of thestory, which begins immediately
after the ending of this movie,Sergeant Neil Howie is rescued
from the Burning Wicker Man by agroup of police officers from
the mainland.
Howie sets out to bring LordSummer Isle and his pagan
followers to justice, butbecomes embroiled in a series of

(21:43):
challenges which pit the oldgods against his own Christian
faith.
Script culminates in a climacticbattle between Howie and a
fire-breathing dragon.
Yes.
The title Lambton Worm and endswith a suicidal Howie plunging
to his death from a cliff whiletied to two large eagles.

SPEAKER_01 (21:58):
That sounds metal as fuck.

SPEAKER_02 (22:00):
Schaefer's sequel was never produced, but his
treatment, complete withillustrations, was eventually
published in the companion bookInside the Wicker Man.
Director Robin Hardy was notasked to direct the sequel and
never read the script, as he didnot like the idea of Howie
surviving the sacrifice or thefact that the actors would have
aged 20 to 30 years between thetwo movies.
In May 2010, Hardy discussed theloathsome Lambden Worm.

(22:22):
I know Tony did write that, butI don't think anyone
particularly liked it, or itwould have been made.

SPEAKER_01 (22:28):
It's time to revisit this idea.

SPEAKER_02 (22:34):
Different movie.

SPEAKER_01 (22:36):
You just said all the auras that I love so much.
Like a fire breathing dragon?
What?
Plunging to your death, strappedto two eagles.
Get out of it.

SPEAKER_02 (22:46):
It would have been fantastic if we did like a 50
years later re like sequel tothe movie.

SPEAKER_01 (22:56):
Get this movie made.

SPEAKER_02 (22:58):
Donald, the money for the White House, put it into
this movie.
We need a big budget.
Yeah, so that's pretty much allI got for the beginning.
Should we hop into the plot?
Yeah.
But before we do, I want you tothink as we're going through the
plot, what is the point of themovie?
What is the director trying tosay?
To me, this was actually alittle bit kind of like I feel

(23:20):
like I got my own point.
I have no idea what like thewriter and director were
particularly trying to saybecause I couldn't tell if it
was like more pro-Christian ormore pro-pagan or anti-pagan or
anti-Christian.
It was very kind of tough.
Or it was it kind of anti-both.
I don't know.
I'll tell you what I think atthe end.
So yeah.
Um, and if you want to tell uswhat you think, uh you there's a

(23:42):
link in the description, or atthe very bottom, you can go to
our email address.
We recommend mailbag atgmail.com.

SPEAKER_01 (23:50):
All right.
I'll tell you what I think rightnow.
I love your kitty cat uhsweatshirt.

SPEAKER_02 (23:54):
It's not a kitty cat, it's uh fantastic Mr.
Fox.
It's the sun.

SPEAKER_01 (23:58):
Oh, yeah, gotcha.
It's on the case.
I was like, what is it?
Why does he have a sock on hishead?

SPEAKER_02 (24:01):
It's my fall sweatshirt.

SPEAKER_01 (24:03):
It's amazing.
Anyway.

SPEAKER_02 (24:05):
It's like I love wearing sweatshirts, and I love
that character.
So it's great.

SPEAKER_01 (24:09):
It's incredible.

SPEAKER_02 (24:10):
Jason, let's let's step on Summer Isle Island and
meet the wicker man.

SPEAKER_01 (24:17):
I feel like we should play the the sound from a
game show.
Like what game show is that?
A lot of game shows.
The ones where they ask thequestions to win a million
dollars.

SPEAKER_02 (24:34):
Who wants to be a millionaire?
They still have that show.
It's hosted by Jimmy Kimmel, butnow it's only done by
celebrities.
Only celebrities are allowed tomake money for charities.
That makes sense.
Like all things now.
Like Weakest Link, we werewatching, it came back and had
Jane Lynch, she's amazing, asthe host.
And it was like, I guess itwasn't getting good ratings.

(24:56):
So, like, let's put celebritiesin it instead.
And it's like, can normal peoplemake money off these shows,
please?
At least they're giving it tocharity.
Yeah, that's true.
I'm charity.
That's my stripper name.
All right.
So the lead is flying a planewhile why some folk song plays.
Barley.
Some barney.

(25:17):
Riggs of Barley.
Oh, Sergeant Neil Howie lands onan island, and the people of the
town say it's a privateproperty, but he tells them,
hey, motherfuckers, I'm a cop.

SPEAKER_01 (25:27):
They're like, get the fuck out of here.

SPEAKER_02 (25:29):
And he's like, technically, I'll arrest you.
I'm gonna say that 500 moretimes.
Uh tells him he's looking for amissing girl.

SPEAKER_03 (25:37):
Woo! Scary.

SPEAKER_02 (25:40):
So he received an anonymous letter requesting his
presence on Summer Isle, aremote uh Herbidian Herbridian
Island, famed for its popularand unusual abundant fruit
produce produce.

SPEAKER_01 (25:54):
Famous for its apples.

SPEAKER_02 (25:55):
Yeah.
A young girl named RowanMorrison has been missing for a
number of months, and hereceived a letter from the
mother.
Um he asked the old men that hemet at the docking, and that and
they are a little off.
They seem very off.
They say she isn't from theisland, but then they remember
her mother, Mae Morrison, whodoes live on the island.
He sets out to talk to her as hewalks.

(26:16):
Everybody pokes their head outof their houses and stares at
him.
And then he stops at Mae's candyshop.

SPEAKER_00 (26:22):
Slash post office.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (26:25):
It's like, where the hell do they get all that candy,
man?
Oh, I love that.
She bakes it all, I think.
I was just like, geez Louise,how do any of them have teeth?
I mean, they're only selling itto them.
It doesn't seem like there'sthat many people.

SPEAKER_01 (26:36):
They've got free healthcare.
Yeah, I think.

SPEAKER_02 (26:39):
Uh, I think the gods, the teeth god.

unknown (26:41):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (26:43):
It's like every year they pull out someone's tooth
and bury it.

SPEAKER_01 (26:46):
That's why they had those pictures.
Uh that's why the girl had thatstatue of an elephant in the
ivory.

SPEAKER_02 (26:51):
Ah, there it is.
So when he speaks to May, shesays that Rowan is not her
daughter because her daughter,Myrtle, is in the other room
painting a hare.
He talks to Murder and MartMyrtle and asks about Rowan.
Yes, Myrtle, if she knows Rowan.
She says yes, and she runs andsays that she runs in the field
because she's a hare.

SPEAKER_01 (27:11):
I thought it was great when he was like, nice
rabbits.
And she's like, Don't fuck withher hairs.

SPEAKER_02 (27:16):
Damn hillbilly thing in this is a rabbit.

SPEAKER_01 (27:19):
David Attenborough's over there, like, yeah, I'm
full.

SPEAKER_02 (27:24):
This is my home.
Um, yeah, this place, uh,there's a lot of hair talk in
this movie.
They love hair.
They love hair.
Um, and I love that like myrtleor uh how he just like gets like
right down next to her, gets alittle paint on it, and he's
like, This fucking child gotpain on me.

SPEAKER_01 (27:40):
Oh, well, the days when you could leave your child
alone with a police officer.

SPEAKER_02 (27:45):
Hey, what seems to be a Catholic police officer?
So he goes to the Green Man Inn.
When he enters, everybody stopstalking and enjoying themselves.
Love when this shit happens.

SPEAKER_01 (27:56):
How about the sign to the green man?
It's great.

SPEAKER_02 (27:59):
And I had it in my notes, and I don't know where
it's at, but it like the greenman like stands for something in
pagan religion.

SPEAKER_01 (28:04):
I know it's like when you play um beer drinking
games, there's you can do thelittle green little green man.
Yeah.
It's something you have to takeoff of your beer before you
drink.

SPEAKER_02 (28:14):
Oh, I didn't hear that.

SPEAKER_01 (28:15):
I don't know if that's that's anything.
Maybe it does.

SPEAKER_02 (28:17):
Maybe it's like comes from the same like thing.
Well, here remove my littlegreen man here.
Yeah.
But I love whenever there'smovies where like someone walks
in, everybody stops talking.
It's like an outsider.
Yeah, the imagery is so good.
And then like it should lead youto believe, like, oh, they're
all kind of in on this togetherbecause they're all like, oh, I
guess we gotta be quiet so wecan hear what he's gonna say, so
we can plan out the rest of ournews.

SPEAKER_01 (28:37):
Well, it's probably the first police officer they've
ever seen.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (28:41):
Yeah, that's true.

SPEAKER_01 (28:43):
It's like as well have the like the old West
swinging doors where he walksin.

SPEAKER_02 (28:48):
It's a crap.
Now we're not gonna be allowedto have sex outside in the
grass.

SPEAKER_00 (28:51):
Oh, no, no, that's still happening.
That's definitely happening.

SPEAKER_02 (28:55):
Um, so he's gonna be rooming at the Green Man Inn,
where he is introduced to thebeautiful young daughter of the
landlord, Willow, and gets anice little song sung to him.
The landlord's daughter.
It's essentially an entire groupof men in a bar drinking,
singing about we all want toboinker.
Yes.
If you're lucky, she'll showwhat's between her left foot and

(29:15):
her right foot.

SPEAKER_01 (29:16):
I know, I love this those two old men.

SPEAKER_02 (29:18):
I was like, man, put them in the old man hall of
fame.
And they're doing their littleswinging together and all that.
Yeah, no, it seems like a goodtime.
As long as they don't like robme afterwards, that'd be nice.
Yeah, they'll probably do that.
I'd want to go to a pagan islandwhere they're just like, yeah,
we don't care, man.
Just drink with us.
Cool.
Yeah, that'd be sick.
Yeah.

(29:39):
Um, Howie hates all this.
He hates commotion and stops thefun to tell them that he's
looking for Rowan.
And everybody's like, We haven'tseen her, dude.
Already, already.
Yeah.
Then uh Howie notices a seriesof photographs celebrating the
island's annual harvest adorningthe wall.

(30:00):
Of the bar with each photographfeaturing a young girl, the May
Queen.
The last photograph is missingdue to being broken.
And apparently we'll learn nonegatives exist.

SPEAKER_01 (30:09):
He's like, Oi, where's that one, eh?

SPEAKER_02 (30:11):
Oh, yeah, yeah.
You sounded American, you seemlike you were doing British,
then you went Australia.

SPEAKER_01 (30:19):
It's eclectic.

SPEAKER_02 (30:21):
Neil doesn't like his meal and wants an apple, but
they don't have an apple.
And he's like, by God.
No apples.
This is like Apple Island.
We uh transported them all, Iguess.
He's like, he's like, Do youwant some like uh peaches and
cream or something?
And he's like, Yeah.
And he's just like, he doesn'tlike these beans look weird,
damn it.

(30:42):
They're natural beans.
Yeah.
They all look weird.
And it's like, he's beingplayed.
So he goes outside, sees peoplegetting down to business, right
outside in the field.
Neil totally.
I I don't think so.
Maybe they didn't get it like agood enough shot, so they had to
like prolong it or something.

(31:03):
And maybe it's because it's darkout, the camera wasn't as good.
I don't know.
I don't know.
But it was wild.
Yeah.
He was having a moment.

SPEAKER_03 (31:09):
And Neil's like that.

SPEAKER_02 (31:14):
He's like, thank you.
And then uh he watches peoplewater a grave and a naked girl
crying at a headstone.
Right.
Water coming out everywhere.
I love I like whatever's goingon in this town.
Yes, I want it.
That's how I mourn.
Just get naked and bend over.
Man.

SPEAKER_00 (31:31):
How fun.

SPEAKER_02 (31:32):
So he goes back into the end and to his room.
We see him praying and havingflashbacks of his time at a
Catholic church.

SPEAKER_01 (31:38):
Yeah, his favorite uh what do you call that when
you take the bread and theblood?
Oh, uh uh communion.
Yeah, his favorite communion, Iguess.

SPEAKER_02 (31:46):
Yes.
He's like uh completely freakedout because he's like, uh, dang
it.
Jesus no one feels guilty aboutanything here.
Where's all the guilt?
We're supposed to be scared allthe time.
Um so he struggles prayingbecause it's too loud
downstairs, and he is feelingtempted by Wheelow, came over to

(32:08):
his door and is like, Sergeant,Mr.
Sergeant, and then she goes toher room, starts hitting on the
wall, and be like, have sex withme.
But much beautiful of a song.

SPEAKER_01 (32:20):
Yeah, the hey ho.

SPEAKER_02 (32:22):
Get out of the eat my pussy, and then she's like
banging on the door, like justreally getting down the wall.
And Neil's just like biting hislike hand, is like, oh, I want
to hump the wall.
Wild scene.
Wild, wild, wild.
It's great though.
And this is where we kind of seethe first time where like we

(32:43):
have a character just straightup looking at us and singing or
talking.
Because like she it's thecamera's outside of the window,
it seems, and she's justdirectly singing to us like
she's tempting us to come intoher room.
Yeah, I think it's veryaffecting.

SPEAKER_01 (32:57):
Um and it's like he was cracking her TV screen.
What the fuck?
Uh yeah, the little hole in myTV screen.

SPEAKER_02 (33:04):
I don't ask any questions.
It was a lot easier when it wasa box of TV.
Now that there's flat screens,it's like there's very little
pleasure in it.
Um, I put it like this a weirdbut yet kind of sexy scene, and
uh Neil looks like he's gonnadie.
Yeah.
Like a boy's gonna burst at anysecond.

SPEAKER_01 (33:24):
It was cool when she went to the country.
She had that little statue, andshe went over and did like the
hand, like kind of rubbedsomething off of it, and then
she kind of held it and thenlike whooshed it outside.
Yeah.
Was that you think that was oneof candles?

SPEAKER_02 (33:39):
That's what she was doing.
Maybe that's like a pagan ritualwhen you're ready to have sex,
you throw a candle outside.

SPEAKER_01 (33:46):
No, she was just like she scoops something like
something invisible off of it,and she's like, Woo!

SPEAKER_02 (33:51):
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Where she does that.
Yeah, it's like, what is that?
Energy?
Aura?
I don't know.
It's just her scent.
It's like, I wish there was amore detailed thing about like
every single thing that was donein this movie where I wouldn't
have to search for like eighthours to figure out everything.
It's great, though.

SPEAKER_01 (34:08):
I love this lady.

SPEAKER_02 (34:09):
Um, so now that Neil uh uh blue balls is settled, he
goes outside and sees more pagantraditions and songs.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (34:20):
So there's a there's a movie coming out soon.
I think it might be a show basedon Stephen King's book, The Long
Walk.
Yeah, it's a it's a movie.
In the book, there's a kid whodies literally from getting blue
balls.

SPEAKER_00 (34:32):
Really?
Yes.
What the fuck?

SPEAKER_01 (34:34):
You gotta check it out.
I can't wait to watch it.
I don't know if it's in theshow.

SPEAKER_02 (34:37):
I doubt it's probably in the movie.
Probably not, but that'd bewild.
I'm excited to see that moviebecause it's got good reviews,
and I'm like, so they walk?
Yeah.
It's a movie about walking.

SPEAKER_01 (34:47):
They have to walk at a certain speed, and if they
slow down, the military shootsthem in in the face.

SPEAKER_02 (34:50):
Yeah, and it's like, I can't wait to figure out
anything about it because I haveno idea what it's about.
And I'm like, what's the movie?
It's cool.
They walk.

SPEAKER_01 (34:58):
It was cool.

SPEAKER_02 (34:59):
Um, so yeah, he goes, he sees more pagan
traditions and songs.
There's kids tied to a tree witha ribbon.
Uh, it's a song about life andgrowing up.
It's like you got a you got likeuh there's a bird that has an
egg.
Yeah, it's like the lizard.
There's a feather, and thenthere's a man, and or then
there's oh, a feather, and thatmakes a bed, and then there's a
man, and then there's a woman,and they lay on the bed, there's

(35:20):
a seed, there's a boy, there's aman, there's a grave, and then
there's a mate tree.
Then kids run around the treewith a ribbon.
Yeah, and they then theystruggle with the bigger.
This was my favorite song.
It's a cool, yeah, it's a coolsong.
It was my favorite.
I was like, hell yeah, this is abig thing.

SPEAKER_01 (35:32):
I love how musical this fucking movie is.

SPEAKER_02 (35:34):
I love it so much.
I know it's such a celebrationof like this of life and like
the circle of life.
And it's great.

SPEAKER_01 (35:43):
And it would all have been perfect if they didn't
burn a man a lot of the kitchen.
And then they put Timon and Pumain that Quickerman too.
Yeah, and they're just likethey're like, this is not a kuna
matal.

SPEAKER_02 (35:52):
Where at we've just been eating fruit.
We actually all love meat, sowe're finding them.
So he snoops in on a class uhwhere the girls are learning
about the maypole, the boys arespinning around in the
background.
We learn that it's a phallicsymbol.
Neil definitely hates that.
He talks to the teacher, he'slike, I'm gonna report you,
lady, to the authorities becauseyou're teaching these kids wrong

(36:14):
things.
Yes.
He's like, Well, they shouldprobably learn it at some point.
Yeah, they're just gonna grow uploving people.
I mean, they're all about towant to have those urges, might
as well teach them, right?
I don't know.
Instead of making them feelguilty about it and then they
don't have proper sex and thenthey immediately, you know, you
gotta feel angry your firsttime.

(36:35):
That's a part of it.
Though I guess like the thingthat he's like having an issue
with is like, you're justtelling these kids to go bang
each other all the time.
And they're like, I don't knowwhat you want from us, man.

SPEAKER_01 (36:47):
Yeah, no, like I think it's uh it's good to teach
uh kids about imagery.
And you mean that's it's part ofhuman existence.
Yeah, everything's a penis,everything is boobs.
Yeah.
That's one of the lessons Ilearned in Afghanistan.

SPEAKER_03 (37:04):
It's true.

SPEAKER_01 (37:06):
Everything is shaped like penis and boobs.

SPEAKER_02 (37:08):
Oh gosh, I was just like, I don't really I don't
know how to talk about this.

SPEAKER_01 (37:12):
It's okay.
It's okay to feel upset.

SPEAKER_02 (37:15):
I'm not upset, I was just like, what?
It's just boobs and penises.
Just boobs and penises.
That's what's in Afghanistan.

SPEAKER_01 (37:21):
No, no, no.
No, I get it.
No, I'm talking about on ourmilitary basis.
No, yeah, I get it, I get it.

SPEAKER_02 (37:26):
I'm just messing.
Um yeah, so uh he tells yeah, hetells the teacher that he's
teaching them he's mad that he'steaching them about sex.
He blames everybody for having agood time and being taught what
valley symbols and what life is.
Lame, such a loser.
Yeah, go read a book.
Have a drink.
I don't know.
Deal with the landlord's.

(37:48):
I'm sure they got weed on thatisland.
Just take one puff.

SPEAKER_01 (37:52):
That'd be awesome if that was their apples.

SPEAKER_02 (37:54):
They're actually probably more on acid or
something.
Probably got some weird acidacid mix with her.

SPEAKER_01 (37:59):
Some apple-based acid.

SPEAKER_02 (38:01):
Yeah.
So he talks to the kids next.
He asks them about Rowan.
They say they don't know her.
He notices an empty deck, theteach desk.
The teacher says no one sitsthere.
Then he sees uh then he goes tothat desk and he opens it up and
he sees a beetle tied to a nailspinning in circles and gets and
gets pissed again.
I was with him on that one.
This boy's pissed.

(38:22):
All right, look, here's what I'mgonna say about this.
Kids, yeah, well, they'rebecause they're seeing what like
the made a poll, so they're kindof replicating that with a bug,
but also, you know, kids arelittle shitheads, right?
They you know, kids love todestroy bugs.
I know.
It's like me throwingfirecrackers and anthills
growing up and like blowing upinsects and stuff.

SPEAKER_01 (38:42):
Yeah, but that's awesome.

SPEAKER_02 (38:43):
Yeah.
Well, so this was I actuallywhen I saw this, I was like,
these kids are kind of cool.

SPEAKER_01 (38:48):
It is kind of cool.

SPEAKER_02 (38:49):
I was like, wow, who would have thought of doing
that?
But then I'm like, well, youthey have the imagery every
time.

SPEAKER_01 (38:52):
You know, you know it like the weird girl that was
over there, like she did.

SPEAKER_02 (38:56):
The weird girl's like, and then after it makes a
goes around the pole two to tentimes, I eat a wing or a leg.
And it's like, all right, thisgirl actually might need some
sort of uh different place tobe.
Um, and so yeah, he's justgetting real pissed.
He's like, you fucking devil.
How dare you torture thisbeetle?

(39:18):
Yeah.
And then uh he asks for a listof students, and the teacher
says he will need permissionfrom Lord Summerlow, but he
doesn't care and he takes itanyways.
He's like, I am the law.
Uh there he finds her name andhe calls them all liars.
You all should be ashamed ofyourself.
And it's like, fuck you.
I wish one kid would have justsaid that.

(39:38):
Go to your own home.
Throw an egg at him.
Yeah.
You'll have birth on your facelater.
So the teacher speaks to himoutside.
She tells him that she has died,but to them, she just becomes
trees and air and things likethat.
Neil asks why they don't learnabout Christianity.
She says it's easier for kids tounderstand reincarnation instead
of resurrection.

(39:58):
Then she tells him to check thechurchyard for a grave, but it's
not really a church anymore, asin there.
Is no, like, you know, theydon't believe in Christianity.
Yeah.
Um, I know I just like wentthrough that pretty fast, but
there's a lot of like reallyinteresting things that she says
and stuff like that.
I really like yeah, no, yeah,she's great.
What a great teacher.
Yeah.
Although maybe take care of thatbug situation.

(40:19):
Yeah, take care of the bugsituation.
Yeah.
Like I will say, like, you know,like a little more authority
would have been nice for ateacher, you know.
It's like there seems to belike, it's like thinking about
it, it's like, oh, I love howfree and everybody's enjoying
themselves.
But it's like, what happens ifthere is crime?
Like, are they just like, eh,whatever?
Yeah, they just get rid of theevidence.

(40:39):
Yeah.
It's like, so it seems likethere definitely is probably,
you know, some weird stuffhappening on that island.
That probably isn't as fun asand great as we're like, yeah,
love this island.

SPEAKER_01 (40:48):
It's probably like you do crime, you get
sacrificed.
Yeah.
Like, all right.
I'm pretty sure I wouldn'tcommit crime.

SPEAKER_02 (40:54):
I'll do the time.
I'll come back as a devilishapple.
Um, but yeah, so he goes to thegraveyard to find a woman,
breastfeeding while holding anegg.
Lol.
It's like, which he's like, sois this just like where
everybody does it, or like justa breastfeeding area?
Do you all have to like bringyour own eggs or there's some
eggs sitting here?

(41:15):
Which is it?

SPEAKER_01 (41:17):
Government.

SPEAKER_02 (41:18):
Yes.
Then he finds the grave andcreates a cross to put upon it.
Um he gets like really pissedoff there's so much junk on this
like one grave.

SPEAKER_01 (41:26):
Yeah, like there were some apples in that basket.

SPEAKER_02 (41:28):
Yeah, then he's like I'm gonna make a cross.
And apparently, when the actorwent back there, um, he uh he
kind of just went back to see tothe island to see some more of
like, you know, just some of thelocations and stuff that he saw.
And that cross was still layingthere.
And I think it was like 20 yearslater.
So no one moved that cross.
I wouldn't either be like, hellyeah, that's uh that was in a

(41:48):
movie.
It's history, baby.
So uh yeah, um, then he talks toa guy in the graveyard.
Uh the guy tells him that uh thegrave there, like that they're
standing in front of, is Rowan'sgrave, and apparently he's
planting trees on all thegraves.
That's awesome.
And it also has the wee lass'navel string on the tree,

(42:09):
because where else would you putit?

SPEAKER_01 (42:11):
Yeah, a little beef jerky.
Yeah, you know, it's like whereit belongs.
Yeah, though.
It was so funny how he wasconfused.

SPEAKER_02 (42:18):
Uh Neil hates this.
I keep I keep calling him Neiland Howie.
It's Neil Howey, Sergeant NeilHowie.
So if you get it.

SPEAKER_01 (42:25):
Where else would you put your nails draining more?

SPEAKER_02 (42:28):
And Howie's like, uh inside the body, underneath the
earth.
I want to kill everybody here.
Um, so after discovering thegrave, bearing Rowan's
Morrison's name in the cemetery,he goes to the doctor where he
says, where he sees a ladyputting a frog in a girl's mouth
to fix sore throat.

(42:49):
How'd that make you feel, Jesse?

SPEAKER_03 (42:51):
Whoo, wee bro.

SPEAKER_02 (42:53):
That uh that I would just be like, you know what?
I'll die from sore throat.
It's like, no, thank you.
Did it fix your sere throat?
Uh no, it uh tightened mysphinxture.
I was like, oh, it's clinchingafter he's all that.
Um and I love it, like pulls thefrog out, and it's like, oh, oh,
we last.
You see, you're gonna be allbetter soon.

(43:15):
And the frog's like, Ribbit,ribbit.
He's like, You see, it's alreadygot your cough.
It's like, well, yeah, now who'sgonna what do you put in the
frog's mouth to fix the frog'scough?

SPEAKER_01 (43:23):
Another tinier frog.

SPEAKER_02 (43:24):
And I love he goes in there, it's like um the
woman's like, uh, do you needany assistance?
Um, not from you, you're allraving mad.
Such a good line.
Uh so then act at the doctors,he asks for the death records,
but the woman he says he needspermission from Lord Samaro, but
he threatens her by arrest,saying he'll arrest her and sees

(43:47):
no death certificate or Rowan.
Um, so he goes to the chemistslash photographer, because you
know, yeah, that's obviouslylike a small island.
You gotta have to use chemicalsto develop film.
You're a chemist.
Using the same chemicals.
Everybody's got everybody'spulling double duty there.

SPEAKER_01 (44:06):
Yeah, and he's got the like Siamese twin sheep in
there.

SPEAKER_02 (44:09):
It's like, well, you didn't know about the one uh
like nurse lady putting a frogin the girl's mouth.
It's like she's a nurse, butalso she uh raises frogs, so
she's like, I gotta make themboth useful, you know?
Hell yeah.
It's like he's like, I'm achemist, but also I also take
pictures.
I had to put them together.
Um, so he asked about themissing pictures from the last
harvest festival.

SPEAKER_01 (44:28):
Did you see the bottle full of foreskins?
It was the first one that'sgonna be.

SPEAKER_02 (44:32):
There's like foreskins, hearts, lungs,
everything.
And it's just like, Why are theycircumcising?
What type of chemistry is this?

SPEAKER_01 (44:40):
Why are they not Christians?
Why are they circumcising?

SPEAKER_02 (44:43):
Uh uh.
Maybe there's a lot of them thatlike came from the island or
like off the island, and thenthey come there and they're
circumcised because they wereraised in Christian beliefs, and
then or that.
Well, so well, what we'll findout later is that um, you know,
that there were Christiansthere.

(45:04):
Yeah, that's why they all theyall fled.
So I'm sure they had someforescare.
And they're just like, hey, thisguy didn't leave.
Let's get his forescare.
Let's let's let's get his penis.
So anyway, he goes to thechemist photographer, he asks
for about the missing picturesfrom the last Harvest Festival.
He doesn't have any copies ofthe of the picture, and the man

(45:26):
doesn't know if it was Rowan ornot.
So how he continues around theisland, finding more naked women
doing pagan rituals and stonearound stone and fire.
It's like almost like Stonehengelooking thing.
Yeah, it was a stone.
It's the pregnancy ritual thing.
That's where that rules.
Yeah, and just got girls.
There's like some girls that arein um uh like dresses, walking
around uh and like I don't know,uh trees and like hugging the

(45:48):
trees and like kissing apples orwhatever, and some just jumping
over fire naked.
Hell yeah.
So, how he search eventuallybrings him into my favorite part
of the entire movie, intocontact with the island's
community leader, Laird and defacto figurehead Lord Summer Al.
Fucking badass house.
He's very calm and kind.
He knew how he was looking forthe girl, how he suspects

(46:08):
murder, and asked for the bodyto be exhumed.
Summer Al's like, cool.
So yeah, do whatever you want,bro.
Like, I don't know if you knowthis, but we're pretty chill.
We're pretty chill.
I got sideburns for days.
Yeah.
He says that nobody there wouldmurder her because they are
religious people.
Howie goes off because he thinkstheir religion is dumb.
So I have I have a whole list ofthings that I just want to say

(46:28):
because this is my favorite partof the movie.
Yeah, yeah.
So Sergeant Howie, your lordshipseems strangely unconcerned.
Summeral.
Well, I'm confident yoursuspicions are wrong, Sergeant.
We do not commit murder here.
We're deeply religious people.
Sorry, Howie, religious or yeah,Howie, religious with ruined
churches, no ministries, nopriests, and children dancing
naked.
Summeral, they do love theirdivinity lessons.

(46:50):
Yes.
Howie, super outraged, but theyare no naked.
I thought he saw a ghost.
Um, so somehow, naturally, it'smuch too dangerous to jump
through the fire with yourclothes on.
Howie, what religion canpossibly be learning jumping
over bonfire?
Summeroe, uh Parthenogenesis?
Parthenogenesis.
Yes, that.

(47:11):
Howie, what?
Literally, uh Summerlow,literally, as Miss Rose would
doubtless say in her assidiousway, reproduction without sexual
union, Howie.
Oh, what is all this?
I mean, you've got fake biology,fake religion.
Sir, have these children neverheard of Jesus?
Summeral, himself, the son of avirgin, impregnated, I believe,
by a ghost.

(47:32):
Um, and then Sorel, do sit down,surgeon.
Shocks are so much betterabsorbed with knees bent.
Then he explains those ways abit more.
They follow the old gods, andHowie does not like this, Howie.
And what of the true God, whoseglory, churches, and monasteries
have been built on these islandsof generations past.
Now, sir, what of him?
Lord Summeral, he's dead, can'tcomplain.

(47:53):
Had his chance, and in modernparlance, blew it.
Yeah, hell yeah.
Baron and Aaron.
It's just like, I don't know,it's like they're back and
forth, and they're both suchgood actors in this scene.
And it's just like, this was agood scene.
It's kind of my favorite hole.
They're kind of going tit fortat.

SPEAKER_01 (48:08):
Yeah, I know.
They're both like highlyfaithful to their religions.

SPEAKER_02 (48:11):
And so it's just like, who's right?
We won't know until maybe theend of the movie.
But also, is it vague?
Um, but yeah, summer SummerIsles explains how to Howie, the
island's recent history andculture.
Um, and this is where I put mynotes, big castle with fancy old
antiques, and then randompictures of tomatoes and onions.
Hell yeah.
Um, Summer Isle's grandfather, adistinguished Victorian

(48:33):
scientist, developed several newstrains of fruit that he
believed could prosper inScotland's climate given the
proper conditions.
Drawn to Summer Isle's uniquecombination of uh fertile
volcanic soil and local watersheated by the Gulf Stream, he
incalculated in the localpopular a belief that old gods

(48:54):
were real and worshipping themby farming the new crop strains
would deliver them from theirmeager livelihood.
The crops bore fruit, and theisland's Christian clergy were
driven away.
The population now embracingpagan teachings wholesale.
People have fun and grow crops.
What could go wrong?
Um, and then Howie's just like,God dang it.

SPEAKER_01 (49:14):
We know how much Catholics hate apples.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's true.
They're bad.

SPEAKER_02 (49:20):
That one fucking apple.
They ruined everything.
We couldn't just be like, allright, we'll give you pass on
this one apple.

SPEAKER_01 (49:27):
Apples are sick.

SPEAKER_02 (49:28):
You eat a second apple, now I'm pissed, and then
I'll create hell.
So enraged by Summer Al's glibcomment that Christianity for
the Christian God is dead, Howiedemands permission to exhume
Rowan's body, which Lord SummerAl says, already did, dude.

SPEAKER_01 (49:43):
Yeah, man.
I thought I'd you could do it.
I don't give a fuck.

SPEAKER_02 (49:46):
Yeah.
He's confident in the beliefthat such a really deeply
religious community as his isincapable of murder.
So, Howie's um exhumes the graveand it reveals only the body of
a hare.
He angry angrily confrontsSummer Isle once more by
throwing a hare, declaring thathe believes that Rowan Morrison

(50:06):
was murdered as part of a pagansacrifice, that he intends to
bring the full weight of the lawupon the inhabitants of the
island.
I love how everyone's alwayssinging.
Yeah, because like he goes thereand it's the uh the teacher just
like hanging out with SummerIsle.

SPEAKER_01 (50:20):
Yeah, he's got his like whole whole getup on.
Yeah.
With his socks and his kilt andeverything.
Yeah, it's great.

SPEAKER_02 (50:26):
And he's just like, you know what, you just do
whatever.

SPEAKER_01 (50:30):
You're the fucking detective.
Figure it out.

SPEAKER_02 (50:32):
Yeah, yeah, because he's like, and where would it
be?
It's like, you're the detective.
Why are you asking me?

SPEAKER_01 (50:39):
Just getting more pissed off.
I would have been pissed if hegot my nice rug all bloody with
a hair.

SPEAKER_02 (50:44):
Yeah, be like, hey.
But the them there, they'reprobably like, ah, yes, I love
dead hairs.
So Summer Al sets him off um andtells him it's good he won't be
around for the May Daycelebration.
But he will.
So um, how he breaks into thelocal chemist shop, how he
discovers that a negative of thelast year's harvest photograph

(51:07):
does in fact exist.
It shows Rowan standing amidst ameager, pathetic group of boxes
indicating that last year'sharvest was a poor one and that
the crops the island only meansof income had failed.
It's like it's like there'sliterally like one fruit in the
box.
And she's just standing theresmiling, and it's like, you
shouldn't smile.
It's not a good thing.

(51:28):
So struck by his recollection ofan offhand remark made by Lord
Summer about appeasing the oldgods when necessary, and by
research that indicates pagansocieties offer up a human
sacrifice in the event of cropfailure, how are he deduce how
he deduces that Rowan is in factstill alive and that she is
being kept hidden so she can besacrificed as part of the May

(51:49):
Day celebrations to ensure aplentiful harvest for the coming
year.
Um, and there's just like yes,because Howie says a primitive
man lived and died by hisharvest.
The purpose of his springceremonies was to ensure a
plentiful autumn.
Relics of these fertility dramasare to be found all over Europe.
In Great Britain, for example,one can still see harmless

(52:11):
versions of them dancing atobscure villages on May Day.
Their cast includes manyalarming characters, a man
animal or a hobby horse, whocanters at the head of the
procession, charging at thegirls, a man woman, the sinister
teaser, played by the communityleader or priest, and a man
fool, punch, most complex of allthe symbolic characters, the

(52:32):
privileged simpleton and kingfor a day, six swordmen follow
these figures, and at the climaxof the ceremony lock their
swords together in a clearsymbol of the sun.
In pagan times, however, thesedancers were not simply
picturesque jigs, they werefrenzies, rites ending in a
sacrifice by which the dancershoped desperately to win over
the goddess of the fields.
In good times, they offeredproduce to the goods, gods, and

(52:55):
slaughtered animals.
But in bad years, when theharvest had been poor, the
sacrifice was a human being.
Hell yeah, it's awesome.
And then how he's like, Rowan'snot dead.

SPEAKER_01 (53:05):
And I love it, it's like he's thinking out loud, or
like you're hearing histhoughts.
Yeah.
And the librarian's like, Canyou shut the fuck up?

SPEAKER_02 (53:13):
Can you like think?

SPEAKER_01 (53:14):
And then he starts talking out loud.
Yeah.
But you know, like a lot of ourChristmas traditions come from
these same rituals.

SPEAKER_02 (53:20):
Yeah, the Christmas tree.
Deborating a Christmas tree.

SPEAKER_01 (53:23):
The Yule log, like shit like that.
Christmas used to be fun.

SPEAKER_02 (53:27):
Yeah.
A lot more fun.
Now it's just fake trees andit's boring.
Yeah.
What's your under the tree?
So um, how he's going to leaveas he heads to his plane.
We see random people popping outwith animal masks.
Rad.
That's when the movie's like,let's go.

(53:49):
That's where it feels real folk.
And they're all like, oh.

SPEAKER_01 (53:55):
What is the word?

SPEAKER_02 (53:56):
They're all kind of mischievous.
Mischievous.
Because they're looking at hisplane.
They're like, and then you gotlike the little noises where
it's like boop, boo, boop, boop,boop.
And uh, so when he gets to hisplane, it won't start, and the
people with mask high, andthey're like, and then he
decides to find Rowan himself.
So Howie walks around looking,he's kicking every fucking door.

(54:17):
That's essentially what he'sgonna do.
So he walks around looking, hespots the hobby horse he read
about, and he chases after him.
Um, but like, you know, he'sactually being like tempted by
it and being led to this place.
He can't catch it.
Yeah.
Um, Howie sees Lord Summer Alpreparing for the May Day
Festival with the townfolk.
He hears that they are going tomake a sacrifice to the sun god

(54:38):
and orchard god for bettercrops.
He's just like, it's like,Howie, you're being set up.
Just hang out on the plane.
Just don't leave the plane, juststay on the plane, Howie.

SPEAKER_01 (54:49):
I feel like if you learn to fly a plane, you should
learn to like how to fix it.

SPEAKER_02 (54:54):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (54:54):
Or at least figure out what's wrong with it.

SPEAKER_02 (54:56):
Especially like if you just land in the middle of
the ocean, it's like, holy crap.
Right.
Um, so he goes back to May andtells her that Rowan is not
dead, but she does not care forwhat he has to say.
She tells him to go back to themainland for that.
He doesn't understand theirways.
It's like the mom's just like,dude, I don't care.
Okay.
Like, no one here cares whatyou're saying.

SPEAKER_01 (55:16):
I've got another daughter.
It's fine.

SPEAKER_02 (55:18):
It's like you're constantly yelling at people for
what they're doing and they'renot gonna listen.
Howie then searches every houseon the island looking for Rowan.
Got like the naked teacher,yeah, got a kid playing dead for
some reason.
Yeah, that was awesome.
Because they're just beingmischievous.
You got the uh boat where it'slike a guy's making a fish
thing.
You got a bakery where they'relike baking a like bread bag,

(55:40):
bread corpse.
Yeah.
Um, you got the uh butcher, thefuneral home, and he goes back
to the inn to rest.
He pretends to sleep as Willowand her father talk about
wanting him to sleep through thefestival.
They put a hand candle by hisbed.
Super normal.
You know, I don't know what handcandles do, but I'll give it a

(56:02):
hand.

SPEAKER_01 (56:02):
They don't sell them at Bath and Body Works.

SPEAKER_02 (56:04):
Yeah, I haven't seen that one.
That's it's at the demonic one.
So, um, and we learned a littleearlier that the innkeeper is
gonna be punch.
Um, so Howie ties up theinnkeeper and assumes his place
as Punch, a principal characterof the Mayday Festival.
Disguised, he joins theprocession of islanders as they
uh kind of go around through thetown and perform harmless

(56:26):
sacrifices to various lessergods.
Love you got.
It's like so at first, you know,he's just kind of walking,
swinging his little thing, andthen uh Lord Summer How's it?
Hey, come on, man.
We do this once a year.
Get into it.
It's one day a year you gotta beinto this.
Yeah, we see men fighting withswords and kilts.
Some of the girls start pokingat Howie with the swords, and
someone else, now you got thespirit.

(56:48):
Yeah.
Um, they stop at where the girlswere jumping over fire.
They create a star with theswords where everybody has to
put their heads through.
Um, it's like game of chance.
Howie goes through, but nothinghappens, and the next person
goes and they chop off the head,but it was a fake head.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (57:03):
So they knew which one to do.

SPEAKER_02 (57:06):
Yeah, but like, do they actually do this ritual?
And it's like, really?
Do they ever cut anybody's headoff?
It doesn't seem like it, right?
No, because I got so I got somany people on an island.
Yeah, it's like we'll go throughpeople pretty fast here.
We can't be cut killing thekids.
I mean, come on.
Uh the Lord Summer.

SPEAKER_01 (57:24):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (57:24):
It's like, oh well.
We're gonna have to find anotherperson to take over.
So Lord Summer Owl releases openbarrels of alcohol for the sea
gods.
Then Lord Summer Owl announcesthat a grimmer sacrifice awaits
them, and Rowan is finallyrevealed and relieved to be
rescued at the moment.
It's like, oh, help me.
Tied to a post, Howie cuts herfree and flees through a cave,

(57:46):
but after a brief chase, heemerges at another entrance on
the precipice where Summer Island his followers stand waiting
for them.
And Howie is shocked to seeRowan merely embrace her captors
and then notices he's beingsurrounded.
Did I do good, Papa?
Uh-oh.
Howie, it seems like thingsaren't gonna work out for you.

SPEAKER_01 (58:04):
Yeah, it's fine.

SPEAKER_02 (58:05):
So Lord Summer Owl explains to Howie that after
painstaking research on theirbehalf, he specifically has was
lured to Summer Owl by theislanders, who have been
successful in a conspiracy tolead him to believe that a girl
is missing um and being heldcaptive against her will, and
confirms to him that last year'sharvest failed disastrously,
threatening the inhabitants witha return with a return to their

(58:27):
previously desperate existence,and that they have no intention
of allowing that to happen.

SPEAKER_01 (58:32):
I will say that this is the first instance where I
ever heard someone say that anadult sacrifice was worth more
than a child's sacrifice.

SPEAKER_02 (58:40):
Right.
It's like, oh, so pagans are alittle bit better than uh, you
know, satanic rituals, I guess.
So it's always like it's gottabe a goat or a child.
Yeah.
And this one is like, actually,you know, if we could just get
like a virgin man, that'd belike Yeah, that never happens.
Bingo.
Um, so their religion calls fora sacrifice to be made to the

(59:00):
sun god, as Lord Summer Allesexplains that animals are fine,
but their accessibility islimited.
A young child is even better,but not nearly as effective as
the right kind of adult.
How he's devote Christianlifestyle and livelihood as a
policeman mean that he meets theoutstanding criteria for a human
that is to be sacrificed toappease the gods.
He has come to uh uh come of hisown free will with the power of

(59:24):
a king, and he is a virgin, butuh most importantly, a fool.

SPEAKER_01 (59:29):
Do you think when they sent the the letter with
the like saying that the girlwas missing that drew him there?
They're like PS send a virgin.

SPEAKER_02 (59:39):
Sends it is like um send this letter back and answer
the question below.
Uh, are you a virgin?
Yes, check yes or no.
Send it back and don't comeuntil we send another letter
back.

SPEAKER_03 (59:50):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (59:51):
So Howie yells that he's a Christian and that he has
eternal life.
Howie, I believe in the lifeeternal as promised to us by our
Lord Jesus Christ.
Christ, Lord Somehow, that isgood for believing what you do.
We confer upon you a rare giftthese days, a martyr's death.

SPEAKER_01 (01:00:06):
Yeah.
And then they do weird shit tohim.
Yeah.
Put some butter on him.

SPEAKER_02 (01:00:11):
Yeah, you gotta oil them up, man.
Gotta might as well eat themafterwards, you know.
In spite of his uh pro uhprotest that the crops failed
because fruit was not meant togrow on these islands, and that
next year the sacrifice of LordSummer Isle himself will be
called for.
How he's stripped bare, thendressed in ceremonial robes and
led to the summit of a cliffwith his hands tied.
He is horrified to find a gianthollow Wickerman statue, roll

(01:00:35):
credits, with which he is thenlocked inside.
The statue is soon to set afireas the islanders surround the
burning Wicker Man and sing theMiddle English folk song Summer
is Ichman in.
And they are getting into it.
Yeah.
Loved it.
And a terrified Howie cursesthem and recites Palm 23 as he
prays to God for his senseaccess ascension into heaven.

(01:00:58):
Film ends as the burning head ofthe Wicker Man falls from his
shoulders, revealing the sunsetin a blood-red sky.
Yeah, yeah.
Jason, do you think the ritualworks?

SPEAKER_00 (01:01:11):
Yeah, obviously.

SPEAKER_02 (01:01:12):
I mean, I'm with Lord Summer.
I felt like the zoom in to theto the sun was supposed to be
like, it did work.
Oh, maybe this is like a worldwhere like all gods exist.

SPEAKER_01 (01:01:27):
Rules.
But they were both, they bothbelieve in eternal life.
But one of them is one's isdifferent.

SPEAKER_02 (01:01:32):
One's reincarnation.
You might the other one's youmight come back as a tree, and
the other one's like, you'lljust like live in this like
nether space or corpse, I guess.
You'll just be like this, likethe clouds?
I don't know.
Wherever you go, whereverheaven's gonna be.
Right?
Uh so yeah, this ending fuckingrules.
Did you like the reveal that itwas all we actually tricked you?

SPEAKER_01 (01:01:53):
She's alive.
I did.
I feel like he did a lot ofexplaining, but whatever.

SPEAKER_02 (01:02:00):
It was yeah, and it's just like because I feel
like a lot of movies, it'salways like, it's like, no, they
are gonna sacrifice the child,but just the fact that it's
like, actually, sucker, yeah,it's you, bro.

SPEAKER_01 (01:02:12):
I felt like Lord Summer Island was he'd been like
holding this in for days.

SPEAKER_02 (01:02:16):
He's like, oh, I'm gonna get him so much.
You thought you had blue ballsfor Willow.

SPEAKER_01 (01:02:20):
What do you think I've been doing over here?

SPEAKER_02 (01:02:21):
Gotcha bit.
Every time you walk into theroom, I'm like, everybody was,
yeah.
Uh it's great.
And just like CRISPR Lee fuckingnails this section, and so does
uh Howie's.
He's just they're so good.
It's so great.
Because like the whole time, youknow, I was like, man, how he
can just die, whatever.
But then like when he gets he'slike putting the wicker thing,

(01:02:42):
and it's just like, I don'tknow, man.
You know what?
Actually, I'm not on these guys'sides anymore.
I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 (01:02:47):
Like, I I thought it kind of ruled, but also well,
yeah, I mean it ruled.
I think he didn't fight backmuch.
Yeah, I feel like these unlessthey're just the best weavers on
the planet, which they could be.

SPEAKER_02 (01:02:59):
Yeah, I mean they spent all year making this
wicker man.

SPEAKER_01 (01:03:02):
Yeah.
Those sticks, I mean, I feellike he could have broken a few
a few.
Yeah.
Yeah, I mean, he definitelycould have broken out.
He could have rammed the door.
I saw no chains.

unknown (01:03:12):
Okay.

SPEAKER_01 (01:03:12):
There was like one iron lock on the gate.
Yeah.
Everything else was just driedsticks.
Start gnawing on it orsomething.

SPEAKER_02 (01:03:21):
Beaver your way out.
Yeah.
Um, and there were animals alsoin the wicker man.
And so that was sad.
The taster was actually in thewicker man when I was on fire.
Like they actually put him inand on fire.
That sucks.
Yeah.
Um, he said he was as scared ashe's ever been in his life.
And the animals were not in thewicker man when on fire.
Oh, good.

(01:03:41):
They were able to use cameramagic that way.

SPEAKER_01 (01:03:43):
Did you hear the words of the song they were
singing?
Um, I can't remember it off thetop of my head.
Had the subtitles on.
It was like when the cow, theyou goes before the lamb, and
then when the cow goes moo, thecuckoo, the chicken, just animal
sounds.

SPEAKER_02 (01:04:00):
Yeah, they're just making animal sounds.
You know?
Hey, whatever you gotta do,right?
Everything comes back to themovie we've done before.
Yes, that is the wicker man.
Jason, what is the point of thewicker man?
Leave those weird island peoplealone.
It's like, dude, just don't gothere.

SPEAKER_01 (01:04:21):
Yeah, there's that one island in the Philippines, I
think it is, where like no one'sallowed to go, but like one
Christian dude tried to gothere.

SPEAKER_02 (01:04:27):
Oh, yeah, where killed him with a spear because
I had like the uh uh indigenouspeople there and like he kept
going back even though they keptrunning him off, and eventually
they're like, motherfucker.
Some kid just speared himthrough the heart.
You're not coming back.

SPEAKER_01 (01:04:41):
Obviously, you won't leave us alone.
Fucking rules.
Like we've leave people alone.

SPEAKER_02 (01:04:46):
Yeah, let them do their weird shit.
Um I put like actually thedangers of faith.
Who's right, who's wrong?
Can any of it be right?
I mean, the pagan rituals seemvery fun and more relaxed and
enjoyable until you know, theburning the man alive.
While the Christian belief isbuilt more on fear and anxieties
that you're wrongs will take youto hell, but if you're good,

(01:05:06):
you'll live forever in bliss.
And then it's also just likealmost thinking that you're so
right that everybody's wrong, Ifeel like it's kind of a and you
know, like people who justbelieve things wholeheartedly
can be dangerous, right?
Yes.
Uh depending how strong theybelieve and what they take from
text and things like that can bescary more so.
I mean, witch trials, right?

(01:05:27):
Yeah, it's totally fun.
They went a little too crazy.

SPEAKER_01 (01:05:29):
They did.

SPEAKER_02 (01:05:30):
Certainly that cool cool.

unknown (01:05:32):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (01:05:32):
And I think when you're comparing two religions
next to each other, the one thatwhere people party naked, is you
should go that way.
Yeah.
And not, you know.

SPEAKER_02 (01:05:43):
Yeah.
Just don't burn someone alive atthe end.

SPEAKER_01 (01:05:45):
Yeah, I mean, um no.

SPEAKER_02 (01:05:47):
You can.
Literally, the only wrong thingthey did was that totally do it
if you asked.
That was the worst thing thatthey did.
Ended up being a big one, butyou know, just like, dang, don't
do that, man.
Don't burn that guy.

SPEAKER_01 (01:06:01):
Yeah, so good.
Loved it.
Um, they just burn the bread manand they make toast and then put
butter on it.
Maybe we'll trick the gods.

SPEAKER_02 (01:06:10):
They'll be like, oh, this isn't a human.
But this is good.
But it looks like a human.
This is good.
It's like when it comes to likesacrifices, it's like, what is
the idea that like the soul orspirit or energy of a human is
going to the gods?
Or they're just like, ha, thatwas cool.

SPEAKER_01 (01:06:29):
Here's good trees.
It's really cool.
Like in the in the Bible, ittalks in the Old Testament, it
talks about God loves the smellof burning human flesh.
So that's awesome.
That's rad.

SPEAKER_02 (01:06:40):
I mean, like most that one.

SPEAKER_01 (01:06:41):
Most gods love that smell.

SPEAKER_02 (01:06:43):
That one in church.

SPEAKER_00 (01:06:44):
Yeah, they don't talk about that one.

SPEAKER_02 (01:06:45):
Like, gods are just so bored up there, you know.
They're just like, oh it's beenaround forever.
Can you do something crazy?
What if we like convince them toput a man in a wicker?
Put them in a basket, a wickerstatue and burn them.
Like, that would be crazy, dude.
Like, and like we'll do it,we'll make them do it like every
like 20 years.

(01:07:06):
Like, they'll have really goodcrops for a while, and then
we'll be like, oh, we needanother sacrifice for your crops
to grow, even though we couldjust do it if we wanted to.
They're like, they're like,they're like, fuck it, you got
their ass.

SPEAKER_01 (01:07:18):
He's like, shut up, this dude.

SPEAKER_02 (01:07:20):
They're just a bunch of like teenagers up at the end.
That's what it's kind of like.

SPEAKER_01 (01:07:24):
Yeah, it's just like it's like the cruelty of
children, yeah, running a humanpopulation.
Right.

SPEAKER_02 (01:07:31):
Oh god.
All right, Jason.
So we're gonna hit our good, thebad, the ugly, the fine.
It's where we discuss the goodof the film, something we like,
the bad, something we didn'tlike, the ugly, something that
we think didn't age well, thefine, something that did age
well.
We got for the good.

SPEAKER_00 (01:07:45):
Well, what I thought was good is just the idea of
this whole community comingtogether, you know, working
together to trick this one man.

SPEAKER_01 (01:07:55):
This one man.

SPEAKER_02 (01:07:57):
They moved the pieces all over the board to do
this.

SPEAKER_01 (01:07:59):
Could you imagine if our whole town got together to
pull a prank on one guy?
Yeah.
And then didn't burn him at theend, obviously.
That would suck.
But like that'd be crazy.
That'd be wild.

SPEAKER_02 (01:08:08):
There's a movie called The Game, directed by
David Venture.
That's very similar.

SPEAKER_01 (01:08:12):
Yeah.
I've seen that.
Yeah.
It's great.

SPEAKER_02 (01:08:14):
Yeah.
Uh it's just like, dude, youmade me do all I'd be so pissed
off.

SPEAKER_01 (01:08:19):
Yes.
But imagine how much fun thatwould be.

SPEAKER_02 (01:08:21):
It's like at the end of this, like um, they throw
them in the wicker basket,they're about to set it on fire.
Ashton Kutcher bump open.
You been punk, bro.
What you think?
I would punch Ashton Kutcher inthe face.
What you think, Howie?
Uh but then there's a partyafterwards, and we all have fun.
Yeah, you know what?
The community here, that was thegood.

(01:08:43):
Yeah.
I thought the pacing and themystery.
Especially the first time Iwatched it, the mystery was I
was like, oh shit, where's thisgirl?
And then, like, you know, thewhole ending, it's great.
The ending is, oh, what abeautiful horror movie ending.

SPEAKER_01 (01:08:56):
Great.
Um, but yeah, the pacing.
And then after they've burnedthe wicker man, he builds the
tower that he lives in and theLord of the Rings.
What do you think they do onceit's like like it's like, all
right, he's not screaminganymore.

SPEAKER_02 (01:09:07):
It's done burning.
It's like, do they keep singing?
It's like what are they?
It's like, all right, well, theykeep singing, right?
Until the sun goes down.
That was a pretty good day.
So we just I guess we'll just goget some drinks.
Maybe.
Yeah, you go to the bar?
Have sex in a field.
We'll see.
We'll see y'all in a year.
Make sure to plant your seeds.
Yeah, plant those fuckingapples.
Yeah.

(01:09:27):
Um, so what'd you have for thebad?
I didn't have anything.

SPEAKER_01 (01:09:30):
That was kind of a messy piece movie.
Um yeah, uh nothing really wasbad.
I just it was such a I thoughtmaybe if they were trying to
make it scary.
I mean, this was 70s.
Yeah.
Maybe add some scarier music.
Yeah, I loved all the music.
I know, no, the music's sowhimsical and funny.

SPEAKER_02 (01:09:50):
I think, I mean, honestly, I think having any
other mu music would make itkind of too cheesy, which is
weird because it's playing kindof cheesy sounding movie music,
but it's like it's so themusic's so in a in the world of
this film that it it's perfect,right?

SPEAKER_01 (01:10:02):
Yeah, this is their world.
Yeah, and like they're it'snothing about it is scary to
them.
Yeah, so I was like, that'samazing, but like it wasn't
scary.
Maybe that's my bad.
Is that it wasn't scary to me.

SPEAKER_02 (01:10:13):
Yeah.
Ever.
It could be, yeah.
And I guess you know, we're moreopen people about everything.

SPEAKER_01 (01:10:18):
So it's like wait for them to burn this guy.
So scary.
It's like, dude, this guy justneeds a break.
I thought for a second that hewas gonna get away with like he
was gonna come out on top on theend, like being the the fool.
He's gonna be like, pop his maskoff and be like, Ha, gotcha
fools.
Gotcha.
But then they're like, I'm afish.

SPEAKER_02 (01:10:41):
No, no, no.
No, no, it's just it wasawesome.
Yeah.
Um, I put for the ugly is thatlike a lot of movies, like other
religions other thanChristianity, always end up kind
of being the bad guy.
Yeah.
Then there's plenty of movieswhere real like the religious
people are a little tooreligious.
But um, yeah, I always feel likeanytime we get like cult movies,
and it's always like, oh, we hada we had to like grab from this

(01:11:04):
one religion to make it weirdand creepy, and they're the bad
guys, and it's always like, whydon't we always gotta do that?
Like, I mean, how about we justlearn about their religion
through your movie and like hey,there's a bad person in the
religion.
Doesn't have to be like, oh,their whole religion, pagan
religion sucks.
This is what they'll do, they'llsacrifice you.
But hopefully you're smarter andyou know it's just a movie,
right?

SPEAKER_01 (01:11:25):
My only ugly would be like when the the girls were
jumping over the fire naked, ifthey were really were children,
that would be a problem.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (01:11:36):
No, they're not like some like there was a kid in um
that class that was sitting atthe desk that was like 20 years
old.

SPEAKER_00 (01:11:43):
Damn.

SPEAKER_02 (01:11:44):
So like a lot of the people in this movie are so not
all of them, obviously, but likesome of them were.

SPEAKER_01 (01:11:48):
I mean, maybe it's just the whole idea of them
being if they were supposed tobe children.
That's kind of strange.

SPEAKER_02 (01:11:55):
For sure, for sure.
Yeah, that was also coming tolike kind of the vagueness to
it.
It's like all of these peopleshowing their breasts, like
would we know what age theywere?
Like, would you be like, you'rea child, please cover up.
You know, or would they be areligion?
You're free, do whatever youwant.

SPEAKER_01 (01:12:08):
Well, luckily they all had they were all holding
their IDs out in front of them.
And it said 18, totally 18.

SPEAKER_02 (01:12:14):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 (01:12:17):
Um uh what do you have that H well?
I love these rituals.

SPEAKER_01 (01:12:24):
I love a good ritual.
But like a whole community doingrituals together.

SPEAKER_02 (01:12:30):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (01:12:30):
Man, it just warms my heart.

SPEAKER_02 (01:12:32):
I put the ending.
This is so beautiful.

SPEAKER_01 (01:12:34):
Yeah.
Great last shot.
It rules, you know, with like itbut it's a surprising movie.
When the wicker man falls, it'slike it's bowing to the sun.
Yeah.
That was kind of yeah.
That was right.

SPEAKER_02 (01:12:44):
Uh it's just such a good visual, the wicker man.

SPEAKER_01 (01:12:46):
There's so much there's so much good imagery in
this movie.

SPEAKER_02 (01:12:49):
It's wild.

SPEAKER_01 (01:12:50):
All the like the little door, there's like things
on doors, like the statues.
Yeah, like the little dragon onthe door, the carvings and the
tombstones.
Like the one of them said, Thisman, uh, one of the tombstones,
this man's protected by snakeejaculation.
I'm like, Bring me more.
I need more of this, whatever itis.

(01:13:11):
Yeah, I need it.
It's okay.
Uh that's awesome.

SPEAKER_02 (01:13:18):
Yeah, it's just like, where was all that already
there, or did they just like putall that up?
I don't know.
I don't know.
All right, Jason, we're gonnahit our next category, double
feature.
It's where we recommend a movieto go alongside this movie.
And you picked I picked Lord ofthe Rings.
Yes, they're the same movie,especially if the sequel.
If they ever made the sequel,it'd be the same movie Dragon

(01:13:40):
and Eagles.
Yeah, fuck yeah, man.

SPEAKER_01 (01:13:42):
But as soon as I saw Christopher Lee in that
underbite, I was like, oh, ohman, I love this man so much.

SPEAKER_02 (01:13:48):
Yeah, oh, he's just he's just such a damn freak, you
know.
I love that guy.

SPEAKER_01 (01:13:52):
He's like, just imagine Lord Summer Isle grows
his hair out a little bit, yeah,gets a stick, has a wizard
fight.
Bring it, bring it on.

SPEAKER_02 (01:14:01):
I picked I I picked uh another folk horror movie,
and it's uh filmed in Britain orsomewhere, can't remember.
Um, it's called The Borderlandsor Final Prayer.
It's got two titles.
I don't fucking get it.
I watched it last year and it'sa found footage movie.
It's a a team of Vaticaninvestigators descend upon a
church in a remote area todemystify the unusual

(01:14:22):
happenings, but what theydiscover is more disturbing than
they had first imagined.
It's great, it's one of thosemovies where you're like
there'll just be a camera set upand it's like there's some
noises, something like slightlymoving, and it's like, what is
what ghosts?
Who are these people?
Who are these ghosts?
Um, but it's really it's it'spretty scary.

(01:14:44):
It's great.
I loved it.
Um uh and the ending is wild.
That sounds awesome.
It's a fucking I want to watchit.
Rad ending.
You may not know what the endingis doing.
See, I looked it up and then hadto kind of realize what it is,
and I was like, oh, that's whatthey were doing.
So whether it was 100%successful, successful with the
storytelling, I don't know, butman, I love the ending.

SPEAKER_01 (01:15:05):
That's rad.
Yeah.
Do you know that uh ChristopherLee was like an expert in toll
in like Lord of the Rings?

SPEAKER_02 (01:15:11):
Oh, that makes sense.

SPEAKER_01 (01:15:12):
He he met Tolkien before he died.
Really?
He would often go to thedressing rooms uh for the in the
making of Lord of the Rings togive him pointers on things.
By the way, this is actually howyou do this.

SPEAKER_02 (01:15:25):
I know I lived back then because I was Dracula.

SPEAKER_01 (01:15:27):
He's the biggest nerd in England.
Yeah, I love it so much.

SPEAKER_02 (01:15:30):
And it turned out he's a really good actor in
England.
That's also kicks ass.
Theater kids, man.
Theater kids.
Once a theater kid, always atheater kid.
So, Jason, this is our finalmovie that we're covering
normally for Halloween.
Because after this week, whenthis releases, Halloween will be
over.
But don't worry, because Friday,there's one more spooky movie

(01:15:52):
coming.
And it's Halloween three.
We're doing a commentary overit.
I've never seen it.
Jason's never seen it.
I've seen it once.
Can't wait to rewatch it and seeif I find it better than I did
last time.

SPEAKER_01 (01:16:03):
I'm gonna go ahead and bet on that.

SPEAKER_02 (01:16:05):
Because Halloween three is a very uh, it's like a
cult hit, you know.
Oh, really?
Um, people didn't like it whenit first came out because
there's no Michael Myers.
But then, like as time went by,people started loving it more.
And so, like, I've heard a lotof praise for the movie.
And then I watched it and I waslike, oh.
Oh okay, this was fine, I guess.
I don't know.

(01:16:26):
Um, but yeah, so look forward tothat for Friday.
Um, and see what we think aboutit as we're watching it.
Hell yeah.
And then Monday in November, nomore spookiness.
We are gonna be coveringFriendship, the Tim Robins
Robinson movie and Paul Ruddmovie.
It's where a suburban dad fallshard for his charismatic new

(01:16:48):
neighbor.
It's got all the greatness ofwhat Tim Robinson does in his
bits, but it's also hellastressful and awkward in places.
And it's so fucking it's sogood, bro.
And Jason, that's our conclusionof the wicker man in our horror
movie season.

SPEAKER_01 (01:17:04):
Oh, so sad.

SPEAKER_02 (01:17:05):
Except for Friday.
So yeah, make sure you join usfor that.
It's I'm just kind of bummed outnow.
Nah, it's good.
We're good.
The horror movie season's over,even though probably in like a
couple of weeks we'll end updoing another horror movie
because I don't know.
That's most of my favoritemovies.
Yeah, it kicks out.
I want to redo the thing.
Yeah.
Yeah, because that was like oneof our first ones.
It's not the Gret best episode.
I think you were kind of sick,and I was still kind of figuring

(01:17:28):
out how to do notes to where Icould do them better and more
like easier to read.
So good.
So maybe we'll do that nextyear.
We'll do like a or have a littleseries where we're it'd be a
remake series where we just dosome of the films from the like
Big Lebowski.
We could do a way better episodeon that now.
Um, so maybe we'll do that.
Yeah, thank you for joining us.

(01:17:49):
Uh join us next week forfriendship.
Um, and if you'd like to leaveus some fan mail in our link on
some platforms, it allows you toclick it, and you can send us a
link straight from your phone orgo to the bottom where we have
our email.
We recommend movies.
We recommend mailbag atgmail.com.
Um, like us, follow us.
If you've been spooked becauseof any of our movies that we

(01:18:11):
recommended, give us give us afive-star rating.
Be like, these guys scary.
Um yeah, and thank you, JoeyProsser, for our intro and outro
film, our music.
Jeez, I've uh lost all energyhere at the end.
Um, yeah.
You look like a deflatedballoon.
I do.
I am a deflated balloon.
Um, but yeah, this has been theWe Recommend Podcast.

(01:18:33):
I've been Jesse.
I've been Jason.

SPEAKER_01 (01:18:35):
Um be kind to yourself.
Hell the wicker, man.
Happy Halloween!

SPEAKER_02 (01:18:42):
Bye, be safe.

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