(BONUS) Marriage and Entrepreneurship...10 lessons from 10 years

My wife and I recently celebrated our 10 Year Anniversary 🎉

Here are 10 lessons I've learned in balancing marriage and entreprenership.

To get my upcoming newsletter entry diving into these in more detail, sign up for my weekly email here

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello, my friend, another bonus episode of the
podcast is upon us.
This is a special, very specialedition episode.
I wanted to share some thoughtswith you about recently
celebrating my wife and I's10-year anniversary and, more
specifically, some things thatI've learned and how to balance

(00:21):
that with being an entrepreneur.
I shared in my last newsletterentry that I had planned on
sending a big old, meatynewsletter that had these 10
tips kind of written out and Iwas not quite done writing them
when we actually went away forour anniversary.
So that is coming up next.
I'm releasing this podcastepisode before my newsletter

(00:43):
drops.
So if you would like to readthe written version of these 10
lessons learned, you can sign upfor my newsletter for free
today.
You can go to joshhallco slashweekly and you'll be getting
this this next issue my week.
My newsletters, if I could talkhere today, come out Sundays at
noon Eastern.
Sometimes they're quick andshort, little concise tips.

(01:05):
Sometimes they're a little moremeatier.
In this case, I actuallystarted writing this out and
figured I would follow it uphere with also an audio version
of this, just to kind of talkthrough some of these tips.
Because, yeah, I've learned alot with balancing being married
and my wife and I had awonderful staycation last
weekend at the time of recordingthis, and it was awesome to

(01:27):
just get away for a couple ofdays.
The grandparents had the kiddosand we just did nothing.
We did what's the office spaceline?
I did nothing and it waseverything I thought it could be
.
We just slept in, we drank alittle too much, I was drunk
texting our hotel messenger,which I shared in pro.
Another benefit of being a WebDesigner Pro member you get to
see exclusive content that isnot made available for the

(01:52):
public.
But, man, we had a great time,just got to live it up and had
some wonderful dinners and wedid something I'm going to
recommend here.
We reflected on this 10-yearjourney that we've been on Three
kids, three businesses laterand here we are and we're very
happily married and, um, I'llset some context here before we

(02:12):
dive into these 10, I guess,their tips, their lessons
learned.
But, yeah, I wanted to sharethis with you to see if it helps
you, whether you are in asituation where you're married
and you're wanting to, I guess,level up, do better at it,
whether you're unhappily marriedand you want to make things
better, or whether you're hopingto be married eventually and
you're catching this at a goodtime because hopefully, these

(02:32):
tips will be things you canreference to.
So, with all that in mind, hereare some 10 tips based off of
being an entrepreneur who's beenhappily married for 10 years
Now.
I do want to set off with somecontext, because the tips that
I'm going to give you would bedifferent depending on the
situation, so keep that in mind.
These tips are pretty agnosticto any marital situation but,

(02:56):
depending on your situation withyour spouse, you may have 10
tips that are a little morepertinent for you, depending on
your situation, if they'reworking and you're working, or
how many kids you have, or ifyou're taking care of elderly
parents or whatever that lookslike.
Important factor and why I'm sopublic about that, is how we

(03:27):
run our day-to-day managing herand dealing with a lot of
therapies and surgeries andeverything we've gone through
over the past few years Many ofyou know about very well if you
followed me, so that all comesinto play in this as well.
All that to say, some importantcontext is that when Em and I
got married, she did join myagency at that time in Transit
Studios for a couple of yearsdoing VA and admin work and she

(03:48):
was also doing babysitting onthe side.
But I share that because we knewpretty early on and we were
very open before we even gotmarried and she was open about
this that she wanted to be a mom.
She wanted to be a mom, shewanted to be a homemaker.
She wasn't necessarily a careerdriven gal, and because I was
becoming more and moreentrepreneurial and I was

(04:09):
getting serious with my webdesign business at the time,
that was just a good fit.
I didn't feel like I needed tohave a spouse that was going to
be sharing a lot of the incomebecause I was at that time not
ready to be the sole incomeprovider.
But I knew that with what I hadlearned and what I had started,
I felt like I could be thebreadwinner.

(04:29):
And obviously our life lookedvery different a decade well,
well before a decade ago, beforewe even got married.
But I knew that even if we wereliving on a lower, modest
income, I could make it workwith what I was learning as a
business owner and in mypersonal development and
everything else.
So, all that to say, there wasabsolutely no shock with

(04:51):
expectation issues, which isactually my first point, and
that is to have clearexpectations.
I mean, there is just we'llprobably get into like marriage
counseling here, but there'snothing more important than
expect like really clearexpectations before you marry
someone.
This is in every category oflife.

(05:13):
This is like we just talkedabout, with your career choices
and your vision.
Do you know, as a, as a woman,do?
Do you want to be a mom?
Do you want to be a homemaker?
Do you want to make that yourwork?
And that is work that is beyonda full-time job.
Those of you who have done thatknow this very well.
Those of you who maybe don'tknow what goes on being a

(05:36):
full-time mom and a homemakerfor several kiddos it is beyond
a full-time job.
So you got to have those clearexpectations right up front,
especially on that front.
Again, when she joined thebusiness, there was an exit plan
from day one.
Basically, we knew as soon aswe got pregnant we would ease
off her tasks and maybe evenafter having Bria, our first

(05:57):
daughter, we figured that shemay do some admin tasks.
But eventually, once we havemultiple kiddos, for sure it's
going to be full time mom andthere's that's beyond full time
job.
So clear expectations.
This is definitely the casewith career, it's the case with
children, it's the case withlifestyle, too, like, do you
want to travel, do you want tobe a digital nomad, or do you

(06:18):
want to be more suburban and beclose to family?
What does that look like?
All of those things which comeinto play with also setting your
schedule and setting your weekas an entrepreneur are really
important as well.
I think this is important too,because if there are clear
expectations on both fronts andlet's say and I'm going to be
talking to guys a lot on thisjust because I'm a husband, so

(06:40):
it's going to be more naturalfor me to talk to husbands, but
as a, as a, as a married woman,you'll hopefully get a ton of
value from this as well.
If that's you, but I, where wasI?
I was going to say, when itcomes to like being the husband,
if I felt like I don't want tobe the sole income man earner,
then I would have brought thatup and those expectations would
have had to have been talkedabout and agreed upon on some

(07:02):
level, because if I expectedEmily, my wife, to also bring
home income, then that's goingto impact what she does day to
day and being a mom and ahomemaker and potentially
working at the very least, parttime.
So clear expectations which, inour case, was that, all right,
I'll be the breadwinner, I'll bethe sole income provider, and

(07:23):
less, god forbid.
We've always talked about this.
We talked about like if, if sheneeded to make money on the
side, we would figure somethingout.
But the goal and theexpectations were that she was,
especially with multiple kids,would be the full-time house
runner and the mama.
Um, now, if you know me, youknow I am very active as a dad

(07:43):
and I absolutely love it, and wedon't do a typical 40-hour work
week, or at least I don't.
I'm very active with the kiddos.
But when it comes down to it,and when it comes to situations
where I'm in kind of hustle modeand there's a lot to do or a
lot to get done or a launch orsomething big going on, it's
really easy to say, hey, cutie,this week's going to be, or the

(08:09):
next couple of weeks are goingto be big weeks, they're going
to be.
I'm going to be working alittle more than normal right
now, oddly enough, we'reactually kind of opposite.
She actually is hosting herbrother's bridal shower with
with him and his future wife,and she actually has a bigger
week this week.
So this week I'm actually very,very light on my schedule in
supporting her.
The week after that she willkind of we'll return the favor

(08:29):
and she's going to be muchbusier on the day-to-day home
stuff and supporting me becauseI've got some courses to get
going on revamping.
So expectations super clear inall those areas.
If you feel like you're alittle too late, uh, because
you're already married and youhaven't set those, now is the
time to do so, and I'm going toapologize up front for being

(08:49):
coachy because I am disclaimerno marriage counselor or
marriage therapist or whatever.
But 10 years in I got somestuff to share.
So that's where we are.
Side note, I meant to mentionthis before we kicked off, but
Web Designer Pro members, youhave been asking me for over a
year now if Em would join thepodcast and I have said yes, she

(09:10):
will.
She has committed to doing it.
We just need to find thefreaking time and we didn't want
to record an episode while wewere on our anniversary.
The challenge with getting heron is she's willing to do it.
She's not a person who likesbeing in front of camera or
audio, but, uh, she knows thatthere's been a lot of interest
in questions, even though she'slike I am so boring.
Why would anyone want to hearwhat I do?

(09:31):
I'm like, trust me, cutie, I'mlike people.
Would they want to hear what wedo day to day?
Um, all that to say, we justneed to figure out the time to
do so.
Usually, when we get the kidsdown, it's anywhere between nine
and nine, 30 or 10 or Godforbid 11 or later, and when
that happens, the last thing wewant to do is record a podcast
episode.
We got dishes to do and laundryto do, so I will get her on

(09:53):
soon.
That is my promise to all webdesigner pro members who have
asked about that and sent inquestions, and everyone publicly
.
If you're not a member of mycommunity yet, I do plan on
bringing my wife, emily, on andwe'll talk about this next tip,
which has been extremely helpfulfor us, and that is a weekly
look ahead.
This I think there's a lot ofdifferent versions on this and,
technically, a lot of what we'regoing to dive into are things

(10:15):
that you probably should do inyour business, which is often a
weekly look ahead, and I forgetif it was, it may have been
something from Brendan Burchardthat I saw, or another
entrepreneur, or in a book, Idon't remember, but something
made this crystallize and beclear for me that this weekly
look ahead is something I alwaysdid for my business, and
looking at what tasks I wantedto get done Didn't really dawn

(10:37):
on me to do that with him andmake this a marital habit.
So generally, what we do andit's been a game changer for us,
especially now with a very busyseason of life we have three
kids under six, as I mentioned,a lot of therapies, a lot of
appointments, a lot of meetings,everything all the time
constant A weekly look ahead iskey.

(10:58):
Now you could easily share yourcalendar with somebody, but
that doesn't always reflect thepersonal needs or the personal
goals or vision, or even I meanwe're to the point where, like,
a trip to the grocery store ishard to get to.
We need to like plan that out.
The joke about everything beingon a schedule when you're a busy
family is actually not a jokeat all.
It's like extremely helpful.

(11:19):
So a weekly look ahead has beenreally helpful for us.
We do that generally on Sundaynights and I'll just show her my
calendar and she'll tell meabout what she wants to get done
If she does want to run to homegoods, or if she wants to go
out with a friend at some point,or if she wants to have her
parents over.
Or, in my case, if there's abunch of calls and I'm like this

(11:39):
isn't on the schedule but I'mgoing to need a few hours
leading up to this or some deepwork segments, or if I'm going
to take Annie, our middledaughter, to school, I'm going
to want to do a coffee shopafter that and do some writing.
We just it's not super long atall, it's not super thorough.
We just look at the weekly,like the week ahead, and we do
this little weekly look ahead,and it's been a game changer.
So I would highly encourage youto do that.

(12:01):
Definitely you're in yourmarriage and even in your
personal relationships.
I mean this could be helpfulwhere you have a roommate, or
definitely your business orbusiness partners, but a weekly
look ahead it just helps avoidunexpected things, Just like we
talked about with clearexpectations.
That same idea holds true too.
What are the expectations forthis week?

(12:23):
You know, if M's cooking dinneron Tuesday night, I know that
I'm not going to take a call atfour and then do some wrap up
work afterwards, because it'sgoing to be five 30 and she
hasn't even cooked dinner yetand the kids have been going
wild.
So, if I know, if we talk abouther cooking dinner Tuesday
night, my goal is to stopworking at like three 30 to be
able to hang with the kids, giveher a chance to decompress a

(12:45):
little bit and then maybe we'llplay and then she'll get to cook
.
So simple as that.
Nothing, not rocket science,nothing wild, just a little
weekly look ahead.
Which leads to point numberthree here, which is just an
overall principle that goodcommunication equals less
problems.
I went to a meeting, like abusiness thing, in a hotel years

(13:07):
ago.
It was actually kind of amulti-level marketing trap.
I didn't realize at the time.
Now I'm really attuned to those, but it was absolutely one of
those MLM you know marketing,one of those like meetups but
where they try to get you tojoin the program.
But it was actually a reallygood speaker and I actually
learned a lot.
I brought my notepad and I tooknotes and there was a quote
that I heard in that that I'vetalked about a lot on the show.

(13:28):
This is a course applicable tobusiness, but definitely your
marriage.
There may be no more importantthing outcome for this quote
than marriage, and that is thequality of your life will depend
on how well you communicate.
One more time if you'remultitasking or if you're mowing
and it's loud, turn it off fora second.
The quality of your life willdepend on how well you

(13:51):
communicate, and I found that tobe true in every area of life,
particularly marriage.
Over communicate my wife and I.
One of our favorite hard Rmovies is the change up.
If you've ever seen it.
There's a scene where RyanReynolds is like you're a brain
damaged mule.
Your brain always call yourwife when you go to the grocery

(14:11):
store.
Because why?
Because you're a brain damagedmule.
That actually is very true,especially for dudes.
Over it's easy.
It's easier, I think, for guysas a whole.
There's outliers, of course,but I think as guys we just tend
to communicate less.
We're just kind of like oh,I'll do this, we'll figure it
out, if you know.
If she does something and Iwasn't aware of, I don't really
doesn't really bother me usually, but I usually get the opposite
reaction and I'm learned better.

(14:33):
Communication is key, even forthe smallest of things.
So, husbands, you in particularare welcome.
Number four so you know, thefirst three are kind of all
communication based clearexpectations, weekly look ahead,

(14:53):
good communication oftencommunicate, get over
communication, drill that intoyour head.
Communication, communication,communication helps both parties
.
Number four is to know theirlove language.
The five love languages is abook that most people are
probably familiar with.
I think some marital programsand probably some church
programs go through it in likethe marriage counseling lead up.

(15:15):
I actually think this is likeif you're going to get married,
I think you have got to gothrough this, because love
languages are also acommunication language.
Now, I think, isn't it aprogram?
Is it a course?
Now, I'm pretty sure it's likea whole thing.
But the five love languagesbook, which was made really
popular I don't know when itcame out, had to have been the
nineties Cause it's like pinkand or it's like a purple and

(15:37):
gold, but it looks super cheesy.
It looks like something youraunt or your mom's going to give
you before you get married andsay you got to read this before
you get married.
It'll really help.
Well, it will really helpbecause you learn their love
languages.
My wife is very different fromme and I'm very different from
her with our, our late, our lovelanguages and what supports us

(15:58):
and builds us up.
I am a words of affirmation guy, which is one of the love
languages.
I like hearing thanks, I likebeing praised, I like being
acknowledged.
When I do something, when I dothe dishes I like, I just do.
I would love to say like that'snot me, but I know myself now I
.
That's why I like hearingpeople sending in testimonials

(16:18):
and reviews and I love hearingabout people liking this podcast
.
It's.
It's not a vain thing for me,it's it's.
It could maybe deep downthere's um, not intimacy issues,
but maybe there's a void thatyou know.
Affirmation is healing for me.
I don't know, but I just am.
I like hearing hey, thanks andpraise.
My wife would never care if Iever said thanks for doing the

(16:40):
cleaning or something.
She just doesn't care, she justdoes it.
Now she is a big time one-on-onequality time person.
I am a little bit of that, butnot much.
I can hang out with my wifelike once a month, and then we
could do other hangouts and datenights with other people or
group settings and I would stillfeel just as close to her.
She is like I need one-on-onetime multiple times through the

(17:03):
month Ideally a date night,something truly away, but then
also night times and times wherewe watch a show together, or
just even if we go out to dinner.
It's not just go out to dinner,it's like I want to take you
and go on a date, relabelingthings like that.
She is a quality time galthrough and through.

(17:25):
Both of us are not really actsof uh well, acts of service.
Yeah, it's another one.
We're both that.
Neither one of us are giftspeople.
Some people, gifts areeverything to them.
Like they really.
They give gifts as a sign of um, yeah, like their love, like
that's how they give.
That's how they show their loveis they give a gift?
They may not say anything, butgiving a gift is huge for them
and they want to receive gifts.
Neither one of us really give acrap about gifts.

(17:46):
So I think knowing their lovelanguage is key and this will
help your business too, becauseyou'll know what to do and
you'll know what to look for andthere'll be a lot less conflict
and friction if you know how tosupport them.
I know I'm going to prioritizequality time.
What's the other one, physicaltouch, that's the other one.
We're kind of that.
But, um, you know, like shewould, she would much rather go

(18:09):
out on a date and have one onone face to face discussion than
get a back rub Uh, although myback rubs are pretty good.
So I've been told three kidslater, all right.
Number five is to include yourspouse into your business, where
you can Now, as I mentioned, itwas easier early on because she
was literally a part of thebusiness.
She knew my client.
She was doing updates forwebsites and managed WP.

(18:31):
She was sending invoices.
I was doing graphic design atthe time.
She was placing orders.
She was in the business.
It was a lot easier to you know.
Quote unquote include yourspouse.
But what I realized is, when shestepped out of the business and
did full-time, mom and I had tobe really proactive and
intentional about telling herabout the business, and spouses

(18:51):
are not going to read your mind.
They don't know what yourvision is unless you share with
them your vision, which isanother key, like, if you get a
chance to do a, an annualreflection we'll come up to this
in a little bit but you've gotto share your vision Now.
You don't want to talk businessall the time, especially with
multiple kids, in the limitedtime you have, but you got to
include your, your spouse, insome way.

(19:13):
They want to know, at the veryleast, what's going on in your
business, whether you do this intimes, whether you do this in
your weekly look ahead, whetheryou do this on date nights but
don't.
The next point is actuallydon't turn a date night into a
business meeting, but includethem in some way and, if you can
, bring them to conferences.
I brought him to WordCamp 2023,wordcamp US and it was not only

(19:37):
life changing for me but lifechanging for her, because she
actually got to see the resultsof what I do.
She knows I go up here and Icome work and I have a podcast
and I have pro and I do courses,but she doesn't really see the
outcome of that Like I do.
I mean, she may seetestimonials online and stuff,
but getting a chance for her toactually meet members of web

(19:58):
designer pro when we had ourmeetup thereup there and seeing
what I do and, most importantly,seeing the results that I'm
helping people get in person andhearing their stories, she was
like oh my gosh.
She even told me.
She was like I feel like I'mmarried to a celebrity.
I had no idea you know, likebasically what an impact you're
having on people.
So it was awesome and it wasreally important for her to see

(20:19):
that.
So, um, do that, include yourspouse where you can.
Speaking of number six, when yougo on a date night, it is not a
business meeting.
Now, inevitably, the more busyyou get, probably the topics
you're curious about talkingabout are things that are going
on with your kids or family, oror business.
Um, god forbid, I don't knowhow many political conversations

(20:41):
in with a fun night.
So I guess, teach your own.
But if you do talk aboutbusiness, share these things,
but don't make it a businessmeeting.
I've really had to work on thisbecause I think probably every
entrepreneur and web designergets to you talk about what
you're excited about and you'reexcited about your business.
But you can talk about yourbusiness for an hour or an hour

(21:03):
and a half very quickly and then, boom, you just ruined a whole
date night talking about that.
So, include them inconversations, ask them
questions, share ideas with them, get feedback and let them have
some input.
Even if you know, even ifthey're not a business coach.
They're your spouse.
They shouldn't be your coach,probably, but it's valid, even
getting insight from people whoaren't in this world.
They may see things through adifferent lens than you do.

(21:25):
But be careful not to make datenights business meetings.
That's been a key for mebecause I have caught myself and
M's always been really generouswith that.
But there have been times whereshe's like can we talk about
something else?
I'm like oh yeah, sorry, sorry,I got excited talking about

(21:46):
workflows and automations andcircle.
We don't even talk about thathere.
So it's a date night, it's nota business meeting.
Number seven a couple ofdifferent ways I was trying to
phrase this, but I'll just tellyou frankly she's my drinking
buddy.
We have a really goodfriendship and that is crucial.
And you have to be proactive inmaintaining your friendship
when, for those of you who arenot married for long or haven't
been married yet, it is so easyto become roommates.
And we've been really proactiveabout talking about this early

(22:09):
on and being serious aboutavoiding the roommate trap,
because you just get busy.
I'm working, she's running thehouse, she's doing a lot of
cooking and cleaning, I'm doingchores, we're both managing the
kids, we're in and out where wedon't get too much time.
Sometimes the kids are up to 11and then we don't have any time
to decompress.
We want to get some sleep.

(22:29):
So when you get to that pointit can be really easy to lose a
lot of the good communicationand you're just kind of side by
side or back to back doing yourchores and running your tasks.
But the danger of that is youlose friendship.
So all I can tell you is,however you gained a friendship
in the first place, keep doingthat.

(22:50):
Be intentional.
Go to date nights.
Don't just dudes, don't justtake your.
Don't just go to dinner.
Don't say, hey, you want to goto dinner.
No, frame it as a date night.
Make it special, even if you'regoing to White Castle together.
Make it special.
Make it a date night.
Have fun.
Do friendship stuff, do othersmarriage strengthening
activities.

(23:10):
If you know what I mean,drinking buddy M is my drinking,
but we had a blast this pastweekend.
We also, as I mentioned, werealized and found out that we
can't do cocktails like we usedto.
We're kind of sticking to justbubbly and Miller light these
days, because cocktails made avery long, made for a very long

(23:30):
Saturday morning for us, andthat's also where I looked back
the next morning and didn'trealize I was messaging the
hotel, chat um and clamoring forchampagne at 11 PM.
So luckily they were reallycool about it.
But any who, him and I have ablast together.
Even though we have differentinterests, we have learned to do
stuff together.
She does enjoy going to hockeygames and she enjoys going to

(23:52):
bars and having a drink with me.
So one thing that's cool aboutthat too, and if you have a
spouse where maybe it's notquite like that, you can still
you obviously like them to somedegree.
You got to work on yourfriendship, do stuff that you
enjoy doing together.
I don't feel like I need tohave my bros to go have a good
time, which is really cool.
Em comes and we went torecently the outdoor, the

(24:14):
stadium, outdoor game for theBlue Jackets, and I didn't need
to like just find a bunch ofguys to have a good time.
I knew she would really enjoyit and we had a great time and
we drank.
We had a good time, we loosenedup, it was awesome.
And same thing with justone-on-one time.
We have a good time hanging outtogether.

(24:34):
So whatever that looks like foryou do it.
Now I've included her a lot onthings like going to hockey
games and going to baseballgames and bars and doing stuff.
But I also realized that that'sa two-way street and as much as
she loves doing stuff like that, she also likes just chilling
back, getting some popcorn andwatching things like Legally
Blonde or Pretty Woman or goingto things like the Nutcracker or
Apple Picking.
And I do that with her and Iactually like Pretty Woman.

(24:57):
It's a great movie.
Legally Blonde is actually areally good movie, sweet Home
Alabama a classic, really good.
Guys can like those things too.
So I've learned to like thatstuff.
I've really learned to enjoygoing to the nutcracker.
Apple picking is like I'll do it, I'm not going to complain, I
don't love it, but I'll do it.
And then there are some thingswhere she knows like I just I'm
so not interested in that andfor her, I'm not going to bring

(25:20):
her to a Meshuggah concert,which is my favorite metal band.
I just, you know she would doit, but she's not going to love
it, it's going to give her aheadache.
So like I'll do this, katie,you stay home, you go to the
band.
Bizarre craft, bizarre thing,that's just.
I really don't want to do that.
We've kind of learned to to domost things together, but
there's things that we there area few separate things that we
do just because we don't want totorture the other person Number

(25:50):
eight results.
So, as I mentioned, this iswhat we did in person and
WordCamp US 23.
She really got to see theresults in person, which was
huge.
But you can do this in otherways too.
A lot of times you could dothis on your weekly.
You know little hangouts orweekly lookaheads.
But if something cool happensin your business, share it, even
if it's just one off.
Like recently landed a bigsponsor for the upcoming Web
Designer Pro event.
It was a $10,000 sponsorshippackage that I sold and I went

(26:12):
down.
I was like cutie, 10k packagethat I showed you Landed it, we
locked in a primary sponsor forthat and she was like awesome
way to go.
Like even things like thatrevenue and boosts and things
like that are really fun toshare because you can be like
hey, look what we did, we justhad a huge month.
But also sharing wins frompeople is huge.
We did a challenge last year inpro about creating a wall of

(26:36):
awesome, which, for me, Iliterally have a wall of like
almost 70 testimonials, justclips from people sharing wins
and results from courses and pro, and she sees that when she
comes into my office she canliterally look and like, see the
impact that is going on here.
So, whatever that looks likefor you, do it.
Share the results.

(26:56):
Don't just say, all right, I'mgoing to work.
Share what you're doing.
Share like I'm creating apodcast episode to help people
or share about this, anddefinitely don't hide the
successes.
Again, same thing with youremail list.
Same thing with social media.
Share your wins and results, butdon't leave your spouse out.
Number nine here last couple.

(27:16):
This is more of a realizationthat they are a part of your
business.
Your spouse is a part of yourbusiness directly or indirectly,
but they are a part of yourbusiness.
Em is not a part of my businesson paper quote, unquote.
She's not on my team page now,but she's a massive part of my
business because I'm able to dowhat I do because she is a

(27:39):
full-time mom and a homemaker,as I mentioned, I am very
involved.
It's not like we're a fiftiescouple and I'm like, all right,
I'm hitting a train there, I'mgoing to the office and I'll
stay at seven.
I want dinner on the table andI want you on the bed afterwards
.
It's not like that most days,but she does the bulk of going
back to her expectations.
She does the bulk of that stuffso I can work and I can have

(28:00):
more bandwidth and energy to dothis.
And when I'm not doing this,I'm hanging with the kids and we
have really honestconversations about the weeks
ahead If I need to do some morehome stuff this week, or if
she's going to need to do morethis week, or maybe we'll eat
out a little more one week andinstead of her cooking if it's
going to be busier.
So, but I've realized that,directly or indirectly, your

(28:22):
spouse is a part of yourbusiness and you know this as
well as I do.
When relationships, when you'reat, when you have trouble with
relationships, it affects yourbusiness, and this is same in
partnerships or whatever.
Even if you're just having abad day, you just don't show up
as well, you're not as sharp.
So this is where, like, thebetter things are going outside

(28:43):
of the office and downstairswhere I hear them being a little
wild right now the betterthings are going to go here
because we're not.
I mean, fights happen,arguments happen, but we've had
to have talks about that, by theway, too.
There's sometimes early on.
We had we were a little morevolatile early on, um, and we
had some big fights right beforecalls and I told her I was like

(29:04):
listen, we cannot get intostuff like this right before I
have a call.
We just can't.
We need to save it.
We can do it afterwards, butI've had to talk about that too,
and she's learned that in someof her areas as well.
Sometimes you want to getthrough a problem or a challenge
, but sometimes there is a timeand place and right before a
sales call, not a good time.

(29:25):
So I had to be really upfrontand open about that and she
responded well and um, for themost part that hasn't been much
of an issue.
We still have arguments andstuff, but you'll learn to,
especially husbands speaking todudes here.
You'll learn what bus buttonsto push and what ones will set
your gal off, and I've learned,even if I'm pretty sure I'm
right about this.

(29:45):
What's the old quote?
Do you want to be right or doyou want to be happy?
I'm right about this.
What's the old quote?
Do you want to be right or doyou want to be happy?
I'm like I'll just let it go orI'll say I'll save it for later
, cause I like being right, Ilike controlling things.
So does she sometimes.
So we have to kind of pick, oryou have to pick your battles.
But all that to say this alldirectly affects your business.
So be really cautious andproactive about that.

(30:06):
And then, finally, this is oneof my favorite quotes ever.
I talk about it often.
It's oh so important.
It's kind of like the glue thatholds all these points together
, which is a quote wherever youare, be there.
When you're on a date night, bethere.
You're not thinking aboutbusiness plans.
You're not thinking about a DNSissue that's going on, unless

(30:27):
that is in fact going on and youjust need to be like I got to
figure out this email migrationfirst.
You're there.
You're present.
When you're on vacation, you'renot working all the time.
You're not thinking aboutbusiness all the time Great time
for vision casting.
But you're not, you know, justsitting there staring off into
space and they're like oh, dad'snot even here.
He's thinking about somethingin pro or something.

(30:48):
You're there.
You're present At the end ofthe day when, talking to
husbands here, when your girlwants to watch friends, you're
not on your laptop.
All the time You're not doingsomething, you're not
multitasking.
And then you didn't hear a word.
She said you are there, you'represent.

(31:10):
I learned this early on when wejust had Bria and I was watching
a hockey game.
I had my laptop, I was doingsome email, I was quote unquote
playing with Bria on the floorand my wife had said something
and I realized I missed the game, didn't even see what was going
on.
I felt bad because I wasn'tplaying with my daughter.
It took me a half an hour to dosomething I would do in five
minutes normally on my computer,and I had no idea what my wife
just said, which is the mostimportant.

(31:30):
So it was then that I realizedI've got to be present.
I've got to compartmentalizethese.
I can do all three of thesewithout the laptop stuff.
I can save that for wheneveryone goes to bed or first
thing in the morning.
But wherever you are, be there.
It will make your life so muchbetter in all areas.
So there we go.
I hope you enjoyed these tips,friends.

(31:50):
Just a few lessons that I'velearned.
Again, depending on yoursituation.
There may be some moreapplicable tips for you, but a
quick recap.
Number one look, or excuse me,clear expectations, which leads
nicely into number two, a weeklylook ahead.
If there's anything you takeaway from this, do that.
Do a Sunday night look ahead.
Number three good communicationequals less problems.

(32:11):
That a good old quote.
Quality of your life willdepend on how you communicate.
Know their love language.
Number five include your spousein the business where you can.
Six if it's a date, it's not abusiness meeting.
Seven don't lose yourfriendship.
Eight share those wins andresults that you're getting.
Helps your spouse know the whyof your business.

(32:33):
Number nine they are part ofyour business directly or
indirectly.
And number 10, wherever you are, be there.
Again, I am putting this in mynext newsletter, so this is
coming out a few days before mynewsletter drops.
If you're not yet on my emaillist, go to joshhallco slash
weekly.
It's going to be a little morerobust.
These will be written out,it'll.
Uh, if you want to see the moreyou know the written version of

(32:54):
this with a little more juicy,details and things like that.
Uh, I would love to invite youto join and you can get the it's
on the next issue.
It'll be coming out Sunday.
This one will be coming outSunday, march 23rd, at noon
Eastern.
That's when all my weeklynewsletters come out.
Josh hallco slash weekly topick that up for free.
I hope you enjoyed this.

(33:15):
So let me know, and cheers towhatever your situation looks
like.
Again, if you're fixing to getmarried one day, if you're
married but you'd like you knowsome of these you can implement,
or if things are rough rightnow, by golly, I would really
love to hear from you If one ormany of these tips help and,
most importantly, maybe in acouple months from now you can

(33:36):
say Josh, thank you for your webdesign advice and thank you for
your marriage advice.
Both are going swell.
So cheers, friends to 10 yearsand thanks to my wife for
putting up with me as a busyentrepreneur and control freak
for 10 years.
Here's to many more decadeswith my cutie, and I hope the
same is true for you.