November 6, 2024 • 34 mins
The episode about dysregulated nervous system with Lauren Starnes
Internal Family Systems Episode
Unlock the secrets of your past and discover how the trauma of your ancestors might be affecting your life today. Join us as we explore the intriguing world of intergenerational trauma, where the echoes of wars, slavery, and familial struggles ripple through time, impacting beliefs, behaviors, and even health. Learn how these deep-rooted experiences get etched into our DNA and what science has to say about the mysterious link between trauma and gene expression.
In this enlightening episode, we tackle the concept of trauma inheritance, focusing on how epigenetics plays a pivotal role in transmitting trauma from one generation to the next. With gripping narratives from Holocaust survivors and the descendants of enslaved people, we unravel how these inherited fears manifest as hypervigilance and emotional unavailability. But fear not, for we also shed light on the paths to healing, offering insights into how therapy and self-awareness can dismantle these cycles, ensuring a brighter future for generations to come.
Our journey doesn't stop with science and psychology; we delve into the realm of spirituality to explore the transformative power of embracing one’s identity. Through the metaphor of the sea parting to pave a path to freedom, we celebrate the journey from fear to freedom. Join us as we affirm the liberating realization of being a cherished "child of God," grounding ourselves in love and acceptance, and paving the way for a fear-free future. This episode promises not just understanding but also hope and healing.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
I'm no longer a slave to fear.
I am a child of God.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Hey everybody, and welcome back to the Wednesdays
with Watson podcast.
I am so excited to be here andI thank you for your time.
As I've said many times on thispodcast, time is something that
we're not getting more of, andso thank you for spending some
of yours here with me today.
Speaking of today, we start ourseries on intergenerational
trauma.
It's a big word, but basicallyit is.
(00:37):
Why do we do some of the thingswe do?
Why do we act some of the wayswe act?
Why do we have some of themedical issues that we have,
when seemingly there is noreason for it?
Intergenerational trauma is aphenomena that is real, it is
biblical, it is scientific, andso today we are going to step
into that realm, helping usunderstand how the trauma of
(01:01):
those that came before us canaffect us and what to do about
it.
The Bible says that God keepshis loving kindness for
thousands.
He forgives iniquities,transgressions and sins, yet he
will by no means leave theguilty unpunished, visiting the
iniquity of the fathers on thechildren and on the
grandchildren to the third andfourth generations.
(01:23):
We know that trauma will affectthroughout the generation, and
so I'd love to drop into thisepisode and talk to you today
about intergenerational trauma,and we will provide a whole
series on this withrepresentatives from everybody,
from the silent generation tomaybe generation alpha if I can
(01:43):
find one old enough to come on.
But we're going to talk aboutthis, we're going to understand
how trauma through thegenerations affects us and what
we can do about it.
So let's step in to thisepisode on intergenerational
trauma.
So what exactly is generationaltrauma?
(02:03):
This is also known, as youheard me say, as
intergenerational trauma.
This is the passing down oftrauma responses from one
generation to another.
It's not just about anexperience.
It's about the way that theexperiences of the previous
generations, especiallytraumatic ones, become imprinted
(02:26):
on subsequent generations andbecause of that it shapes our
beliefs, our behaviors and evenour physical health.
So generational trauma can stemfrom a range of experience that
we think about and we'll findout a lot about this when we
interview mom McGowan especiallyfrom the silent generation and
maybe even the baby boomers,because they had some major
(02:47):
historical events in their lives.
Both of those generations hadwar.
We think back to slavery andtalk to people that belong to
the black and brown community.
Slavery generations back areaffecting those people today.
The Holocaust is another one,even systematic oppression
within a country.
(03:07):
So these are big things, right.
These aren't familial traumasthat happen.
But the same thing happens whenthere's familial trauma, when
there is just something justbeing completely replicated from
generation to generation.
These kinds of things thataffect us from an
intergenerational standpoint arenot isolated incidents.
They're events that leave adeep imprint not only on the
(03:31):
people who directly experienceit, but their descendants too,
just like that verse in Exodustold us.
Trauma is not just an emotionalresponse to an event.
It can and does we talked aboutmany times on this podcast
create lasting changes in howour brains work and how our
bodies respond to stress, andeven how our genes and our DNA
(03:52):
are expressed, and so we'll talkabout this in a few minutes.
But trauma turns on and offcertain genes, and that, in an
essence, causes issues, and Ihad a great example of that in
that I have celiac disease, andit wasn't until I was in my
mid-30s that that was diagnosedor that I even began to have
problems with it.
(04:13):
And celiac disease is a genethat I inherited.
It was there but it was notturned on, and so I was not
responding like people withceliac disease does.
But about my mid-30s, that genegot turned on.
It's a perfect example of howtrauma is passed down from
generation to generation and howour genes and basically our
(04:33):
genes are what tells our bodywhat to do grow blonde hair,
grow red hair, be tall, be shortthose kinds of things can be
affected and especially immuneresponses can be affected.
So it's not just an emotionalresponse to an event.
It can and does create lastingchanges to both our brains and
our bodies.
Let's talk about how that.
Before we get into how trauma ispassed down, I want to take a
(04:54):
minute to just review whathappens when an individual
experiences trauma.
And remember we define traumaon this podcast as anything that
pushes somebody outside oftheir window of tolerance, their
ability to cope, their capacity.
There's a bunch of scientificwords we can put here, but
trauma is when something pushessomebody outside their ability
(05:15):
to deal with a normal situationor with a traumatic situation.
When a person undergoes thesetraumatic experiences, we know
that the body gets flooded withthose stress hormones cortisol
and adrenaline and short term,puts us in that fight or flight
mode, that cheetah mode that wetalk about so often on this
podcast, where the cheetah isthe fastest animal in the world.
(05:36):
They will run until they can't,because, when threatened, they
get these dumps of especiallyadrenaline and can run fast in
short distances, and so it doescatch up with us.
But for those of experienceprolonged and repeated trauma,
the body and the brain get wiredto stay in a heightened state
of vigilance, and this is whathappened to me when I ended up
(05:58):
in the hospital in 2008.
My body was wired to constantlybe on guard.
My body was wired to constantlybe on guard, my brain was wired
to constantly be on guard andthat was exhibiting itself in
nightmares and flashbacks andand isolating behavior and
self-medicating behavior,because the brain just was on
(06:18):
alert all the time.
If you could imagine those ofus that live in Florida and were
just recently hit by HurricaneMilton that state of vigilance
all the time.
And so, because I was there, Iended up with a complete nervous
breakdown in the hospitalbecause my brain had learned,
because of the trauma that I hadbeen through the 34 years
previously, to stay in thatfight or flight because it
(06:39):
always thought that my body wasgoing to die.
This definitely leaves a markand in my case it turned on that
gene for celiac disease andmany other things, but it also
can affect sleep patterns.
Immunity that's whereautoimmune diseases come in.
Oftentimes, when there's trauma,severely impacts the nervous
system, making it more difficultto regulate emotions and manage
(07:02):
stress.
This should sound familiar toyou guys.
We spend a lot of time talkingabout regulating nervous systems
.
On this podcast.
There is an episode just acouple back with my friend
Lauren Stearns.
We talk about when the bodytalks and how to understand when
your nervous system isdysregulated.
And again, that nervous systemcauses these health problems
that we talked about.
(07:23):
That dysregulated nervoussystem causes those health
issues, causes an abundance ofthings.
And, don't forget, your brainis fundamentally changing.
I want to stop here just toremind you about your brain
Without getting too scientific-y.
Remember, if you hold your handup and put your thumb in the
middle and put your four fingersdown, when those four fingers
are down, that is yourprefrontal cortex, that is what
(07:44):
helps us makeal cortex, that iswhat helps us make good
decisions, that's what helps usstay appropriate, that's what
helps us live a quote normallife.
When trauma happens, dr DanSiegel says we flip our lid.
So now, if you have your handlike that, flip your four
fingers up and now it's likeyour thumb is in the middle of
your palm, and your thumb thenrepresents your hippocampus and
(08:04):
your amygdala.
Remember now, you're beingruled by these two anatomical
parts of your brain and you'rein the prefrontal cortex.
The part of your brain thathelps you make sense of things
is not online, and so long-termtrauma can actually change the
structure of both thehippocampus, which is involved
in memory, and so you're notremembering those things
(08:26):
properly, or you might not evenremember how to get to the bank
when you're in trauma brain.
It may also shrink due to thischronic stress.
When you have generationaltrauma and your brain is on
overload, the amygdala, the onethat is responsible for fear
responses might becomeoverreactive, leading to being
afraid of everything and allkinds of situations that aren't
threatening.
(08:46):
And so you understand how traumaeven not your trauma if it's
affected someone in your family,it is likely to affect you.
It's something very interestingto think about as we talk about
how trauma has passed fromgeneration to generation.
Think about a mom, a soon-to-bemom, who is pregnant with a
girl.
But mom, back when she was 10,12, 13 years old, experienced
(09:13):
significant trauma.
12, 13 years old experiencesignificant trauma.
It has been proven that thattrauma that she experiences
earlier in life not only affectsher brain, but it changes her
reproductive structure, and soher, her eggs are actually
affected by the trauma.
And so then that means the babyis affected by the trauma, and
(09:35):
if that baby is a girl, her eggsare affected by the trauma.
So you can see how,scientifically, when the mom has
experienced trauma, herreproductive eggs are affected
by the trauma and it's going tochange some of the ways that the
DNA acts in her children.
And then, if she has girls,their eggs too are affected.
(09:58):
As of right now, there's noscientific studies on the sperm
and whether or not traumaaffects the way those genes are
expressed, but for sure we knowthat reproductive eggs are
affected and females with traumawhen it's passed down from
generation to generation,especially from female to female
(10:18):
.
And so these brain changes thathappen as a result of trauma
have a lasting impact and, likeI said, can be passed down
through what's calledepigenetics, which is what I
just explained to you.
This refers to the way thegenes express themselves.
Like I said, genes say hey, betall, be short, have blonde hair
, have red hair, don't have thisdisease, don't have this
(10:40):
disease, that kind of thing.
And so trauma will change theway the body acts.
It doesn't involve changes toyour actual DNA sequence, so
that's always the same, but itdoes affect the way those genes
behave and all of the realmsthat I talked about, but
particularly immunity.
Basically, it's how theenvironment influences the genes
(11:01):
that we're born with.
Trauma can lead to epigeneticmarkers that essentially turn
certain genes on or off, likewhat happened to me, and those
markers can be passed down toour children, meaning they will
inherit the predisposition for aheightened stress response or
mental health issues withoutdirectly experiencing the trauma
.
Now I know what some of you arethinking like.
(11:21):
Oh man, I had trauma as a kidand I've had kids.
What have I done to my ownchildren?
And so I want to provide hopefor you, because the same hope
that we always provide on thispodcast is true here too.
It just means that I hope thatthis podcast episode helps you
do two things.
First of all, address yourtrauma.
Secondly, address how yourtrauma has affected your
children, and particularly ifyour children are overly anxious
(11:44):
, overly afraid separation,anxiety look and see if some of
that could be possibly some ofyour trauma being passed down to
them.
And certainly there's help andhope and all the things.
That's why we do this podcastthat this is not meant to make
you feel badly if you alreadyhave children and you experience
trauma as a child.
But they do get thispredisposition for heightened
(12:05):
stress response and or mentalhealth issues without directly
experiencing the trauma.
And there's also I want to justkind of plug in here vicarious
trauma.
A lot of times, children, evenknowing that we experience
trauma, by us talking about itaround them in an improper way,
is also something that could bevicariously affecting them.
(12:26):
Now you might wonder how exactlygenerational trauma shows up.
If someone didn't experiencethe trauma that their
grandparents went through, whywould they still feel its
effects?
So, without getting tooscientific, one of the ways that
that generational traumamanifests is through parenting
styles and family dynamics.
Right, and so if a parentexperienced trauma, they might
(12:47):
have a higher tendency towardsbehaviors like hypervigilance,
emotional unavailability andoverprotection.
This is what happened to me, Ibelieve.
I don't know my mom's wholestory, but she was all of those
things she was anxious, she washypervigilant, she was
emotionally unavailable, she wasnot overprotective, but she was
all of those other things.
And this leads me to believe asI walk through my early
(13:10):
childhood and many people ask mehow I can forgive her or how I
can even be okay.
It's that age-old question thatsomebody penned so long ago.
Instead of what's wrong withyou is what happened to you, and
I don't know what happened tomy mom that pushed her trauma
onto me, and I never will thisside of heaven.
But I think those of you thatmight be out there that are
(13:31):
listening to me under the soundof my voice, that are
hypervigilant, that do strugglewith anxiety, emotional
unavailability, codependence,many of those things you might
need to look and see ifsomething has been
unintentionally passed down,especially as it pertains to
fears and anxieties.
And a good example of that ischildren in the Holocaust
survivors, which would be goshthat could.
(13:54):
That could range from thesilent generation maybe into a
little bit of the baby boomers,but those people, those
survivors, have been found tocarry unique anxieties and fears
linked to scarcity and survival.
The same goes for theirdescendants of those experience
who experienced forced slavery,like African American community
(14:14):
for sure, and so survivors ofthe Holocaust and survivors of
many wars and all of thosethings are going to have effects
from it.
There is a phrase coined afterthe Holocaust, where many
survivors really struggled andcounselors were telling them the
war is over.
Remember, the war is over andwe have to help our people that
(14:37):
have been affected bygenerational trauma understand
that not only is the war over,but the war was never theirs and
that we need to address whathas affected them, just by
nature of being a descendant ofsomebody who saw some of those
things.
Generational trauma also canappear in patterns of behavior
like self-sabotage, lowself-esteem and fear of just
(14:59):
about anything.
These behaviors arise as copingmechanisms for stress, and when
these mechanisms or lack ofmechanisms, coping mechanisms
are ingrained in the familyculture, they're passed down,
sometimes without explanation,and so we do have to kind of
examine ourselves if we havechildren, and examine whether we
(15:19):
are creating a culture insideour home of anxiety and fear and
emotional unavailability andother trauma responses that we
are passing down to them justbecause it's in our home and as
a double--dutch issue there,because they also have the gene
expression change that traumadoes that we talked about.
There are some specific formsof generational trauma and it
(15:42):
does manifest differentlyObviously racial trauma.
So for individuals frommarginalized racial or ethnic
backgrounds, this generationaltrauma is often tied to systemic
discrimination or forcedmigration.
You think of our NativeAmericans, the kind of trauma
that they passed down fromgeneration to generation.
In many cases, this trauma islinked to both historical
(16:04):
oppression, like I just talkedabout, and ongoing racism, like
is often true with our AfricanAmerican friends.
There is war trauma.
Descendants of those who livedthrough wars this is
particularly going to be true ofthe baby boomers, such as the
Vietnam War, world War II.
You may express heightenedanxiety even if there weren't
directly impacted events.
(16:24):
I'm going to talk to MamaGallen, who is part of the
silent generation and she wasalive during both World War II
and Korea and Vietnam for thatmatter, but I definitely want to
talk to her about herexperiences.
She also lived through theGreat Depression, and so how did
that affect how she lived herlife and did she see some of
those changes in her children?
(16:45):
And so that's going to be areally interesting conversation.
And then the baby boomers willtalk to you about Vietnam War
and then Gen X.
Significant events in ourgeneration are many, including
the shooting at Columbine, whichat the time was just
unfathomable to anybody that wasalive during that time.
(17:05):
We just had never known such athing.
And then particularly, and then, especially September the 11th,
everybody remembers where theywere, and those are just a
couple out of Gen X that I canthink of.
We will talk to the millennials.
That's going to be interestingbecause I think we're going to
see a shift in how these thingsare experienced between
Generation X and the millennials.
(17:27):
After the millennials we willtalk to Gen Z and then after Gen
Z, we will talk to the oldestof Generation Alpha, and it's
going to be really interestingas we watch how each generation
walked through these things thathappened in their lifetime,
like racial trauma, like wartrauma.
There's also obviously familytrauma that happens like abusive
dynamics inside the home.
(17:48):
That's probably persisted overgeneration after generation
after generation, and guys, it'sjust time to stop the madness.
There's also immigrant trauma.
For immigrants and theirdescendants, that's going to
become more of a thing,especially in the United States.
Trauma may come from sacrificesand hardships.
You think of people whomigrated into the United States.
(18:08):
Regardless of how you feelabout that, if they landed in
this country, they are going tohave experienced trauma both
above them epigenetics and inthem, and then obviously passing
it on to their children becauseof just what they have to do to
emigrate to another country,and this would be true of
immigrants from all over theworld, really.
(18:30):
And then environmental traumapeople who come from regions
that have been affected bynatural disasters or an
environmental destruction canproduce generational trauma.
I want to stop here because,gosh, the eastern seaboard has
been hit hard in the last coupleof months by natural disasters,
and so if you have children, itis important for you guys to
(18:51):
address what we just all wentthrough, and even if that means
getting them professional help.
We know that one of the C's onthis podcast is counseling, but
definitely have to address it.
We want to recognize that thefaster we address these things
and counseling and even justknowing about it listening to
this podcast huge in recognizinggenerational trauma.
(19:13):
So you might wonder do I havegenerational trauma?
And this is a challengingquestion because sometimes these
things are deeply ingrained inwho we are.
That feels normal Like.
Sometimes you might go tosomebody else's house and go oh,
y'all don't do it that way,this is the way we do it, and so
it is hard, but there's somequestions to ask yourself.
So it is hard, but there's somequestions to ask yourself Are
(19:34):
there patterns in your familythat seem harmful or limiting?
No-transcript.
Are there patterns in yourfamily that seem harmful or
limiting, even if you don't knowwhy they exist?
Do you have fears or anxietiesthat don't make any sense to you
, like they seem disappropriateto any experience that you've
(19:57):
ever had?
Do they rule you?
I'm not talking about beingafraid of height.
I'm talking about everydayfears and anxieties that are
like you can't explain, becausethere's no reason in your
explanation for you to havethese fears and anxieties.
Remember brain changes, pfcoffline.
Be enrolled by your fear center.
Are there family stories oftrauma that seem to affect
(20:21):
family members in subtle andunexplained ways?
And I would say to those of youlistening, this would be true
for your spouse too, especiallyif you have children.
This might help you understandsome things and I'm not trying
to start a fight, but it mightbe an opportunity, an open door
for you guys to get some help Ifyou both are being affected by
intergenerational trauma or justone of you are either way.
(20:44):
Awareness, curiosity.
If I added another C to thispodcast, it would be that
Counseling, community, churchand curiosity.
Get curious, journal, think,write down things, get to
counseling.
But awareness is that hugefirst step and the way to be
aware is to be curious.
Once we recognize that ourstruggles might be tied to
(21:06):
generational trauma, you have noidea how free you will feel.
Be aware is to be curious.
Once we recognize that ourstruggles might be tied to
generational trauma, you have noidea how free you will feel.
I remember learning thisconcept and thinking like.
I'll give you guys a greatexample.
It was in our home.
There was a great culture offear of everything before I was
taken away from my mom when Iwas 12 years old, and that still
affects me today, particularlylike when I drive.
(21:28):
My mom never drove a day in herlife because she was always too
anxious to drive and that gotpassed down to me Because when I
drive, if I'm in traffic orsomething like that, I sometimes
will have a full on panicattack when I'm driving.
And I never understood thatbefore because I didn't have any
reason to be so anxious when Idrove and but when I understood
that her fear and her anxietyand the fact that I watched that
(21:49):
, so not only was my geneexpressions changed and so I was
probably born somebody notfearful and or not without a
proclivity for anxiety, butbecause she had great anxiety,
that got passed on to me and thedriving as just one example of
that.
But here's the hope.
(22:10):
But, jesus, because we can healfrom generational trauma.
Healing from it can beincredibly powerful, not only
for ourselves but for thosegenerations to come.
We can stop it right.
We can stop our children fromreproducing our fears, our
anxieties or any other way thattrauma is showing up in our
lives.
There are many, many ways toheal from generational trauma,
(22:32):
and we talked about many ofthese, but you do need to get
into some counseling.
There's one trauma modalitythat we've not talked about a
lot on this podcast there's anold, old episode about internal
family systems.
That is a phenomenal one forgenerational trauma, because
what internal family systemsdoes is helps you identify which
(22:53):
part of you is showing up andthe behavior that you don't like
, and why and how to address it.
Emdr, which is we've talkedabout a lot, is growing more and
more in popularity.
It is the modality that I choseand it was an amazing, as it
continues to be experienced, forthe identification and the
treatment of behaviors that Idon't want in my life.
(23:16):
There is somatic experiencing,which is paying attention to
your body and and addressing thetrauma that way.
There's also something calledcognitive behavior therapy,
which helps you change the wayyou think about things.
So you may think I am soanxious, I suck, I'm never going
to be able to do anything.
Cognitive behavior therapytakes that thought and turns it
around to what is true is thatyou don't suck, that you're a
(23:38):
valuable child of the Most HighGod and that this stuff can be
worked through.
You just got to change the wayyou think about it.
And I think of Philippians 4.8when I think about cognitive
behavior therapy.
Is it good, is it true?
Is it excellent?
Is it praiseworthy?
Is it good report?
Think on these things.
Philippians 4.8 says Workingwith a therapist or counselor
(23:58):
can help individuals identifyand process emotions that don't
even feel like yours.
And that's the thing aboutgenerational trauma.
Trauma is very confusing.
Family therapies can be avaluable tool as it allows all
the family members to healtogether, breaking down patterns
and addressing shared trauma.
(24:19):
And let me tell you that Satanwould like nothing less than for
you to go to family therapy andfor the entire family to come
together as one and address theway that trauma before them has
affected the entire familydynamic.
Family therapy a valuable toolwhen we're talking about
generational trauma or behaviorsthat are happening inside the
home and nobody knows why.
Family therapy.
(24:40):
It can be invaluable to helpeverybody understand.
If I added another C to thispodcast, it would be compassion
for yourself and forgiveness ofothers.
These play a role in healinggenerational trauma.
Compassion for yourself so manytimes when we don't understand
why we behave, why we behave, weare the critics of ourselves
(25:05):
and get mad at ourselves foracting a certain way or doing a
certain thing, when in fact,what we need is some compassion
and curiosity for why we act theway we do.
Is it because it was passeddown to me and this has nothing
to do with anything that'shappened to me?
We also have to add inforgiveness.
We have a whole series onforgiving trauma makers.
Forgiveness plays a huge role instopping generational trauma.
(25:28):
We have to acknowledge the painright and acknowledge that our
ancestors, and in my case, mymom, did the best they could
with the knowledge and resourcesthey had.
Again, it's asking thatquestion about those that came
before you not why did you dowhat you do, but what happened
to you.
Why did you do what you do, butwhat happened to you.
What happened to you and thatcompassion of others will lead
(25:56):
you into a heart of forgivenesswhen you look at those that came
before you, whether they harmedyou directly or not, but you
certainly are being affected bytheir trauma.
Instead of saying what's wrongwith you, what happened to you,
when we choose this compassion,we can release resentment and
heal parts of ourselves thathave felt burdened all of your
life and you don't know why.
(26:16):
Really, though, after that,after you're okay, it's time to
break the cycle of generationaltrauma.
What do you want to pass downto your children?
Is it anxiety?
Is it fear?
Is it being ruled with your PFCoffline?
Is it codependency?
(26:39):
Is it abuse?
And when I say abuse, I meanfood, people, drugs, alcohol.
What are they seeing in yourhome?
What do you want to pass down?
Do you need to get to acounselor so that you can stop
(26:59):
the trauma from affecting yourchildren?
These are sober questions foryou to ask if you have children
in your home.
It's never too late to break thecycle of generational trauma,
because the fact of the matteris is each step we take to
process and heal from trauma isa step towards a different
future for ourselves, ourchildren and even our
(27:20):
communities.
Think about that, like you areraising future members of our
community.
We want them to be the bestmembers of that community that
we can and we become more awareof our triggers and patterns.
Then we choose to address themand commit to a new way of
thinking and responding.
You are not only healingyourself, but you're creating a
(27:42):
healthier foundation foreverybody that comes after you
with your DNA.
This is the work of a lifetime.
It is not easy, but when weunderstand and address
generational trauma, we take thepower out of it.
Say that again when weunderstand generational trauma,
we take the power out of it.
(28:03):
We choose not to be defined byit, but we get our sword and we
go fight.
We fight in a counselor'soffice, we fight on our knees,
we fight in our community, andthen we get defined by our
resilience.
We get defined by our capacityfor love and we move into a
(28:26):
growth period that we may neversee coming, because, guys, you
see, we are no longer slaves tothose things that are meant to
destroy us.
We just aren't, because Jesuscame so that we might have life
and that we might have it moreabundantly.
Have it more abundantly, andbecause of that we have the
(28:51):
opportunity to heal.
We don't have to continually bedefined by those things that
happen before us.
We are no longer slaves.
Think about that.
Think about that Because heunravels us with a melody.
He surrounds us with a song.
That song is of deliverancefrom our enemies, satan, who
(29:17):
wants us to be ruled by thisgenerational trauma.
But God surrounds us with asong of deliverance until all
our fears are gone, because weare no longer a slave to fear.
We are children of God.
We know that from our mother'swomb, he has chosen us and love
(29:41):
has called our name.
We are born again into aperfect family and his blood
flows through our veins.
So we are no longer a slave tofear.
We are a child of God.
No longer slaves to fear, guys.
We are liberated from ourbondage.
(30:02):
We're sons and daughters.
Let us sing in the freedom.
We are children and daughters.
Let us sing in the freedom.
We are children of God.
Guys, be no longer slaves togenerational trauma.
Take Jesus' words as they are,as truth is that he has come to
(30:23):
give us life and give us a lifethat is abundant and free.
To give us life and give us alife that is abundant and free.
Okay, guys, thank you so muchfor listening.
We will be back in two weeksand all fingers and toes and all
the things are crossed that wewill have an episode with Mama
Gowron that represents thesilent generation.
(30:44):
I hope you guys learnedsomething today.
I hope that you have anactionable item and if you have
any questions for me, I'm happyto answer them.
You can just send me a textmessage right there in the show
notes.
I am the only one that seesthat.
I imagine this episode willpromote a lot of questions and
I'm here for it, and so shoot mea text message through the
(31:05):
podcast and I will be happy toanswer the questions in the best
way I can.
We will see you back here intwo weeks and until then, you
know what I'm going to say.
You are seen, you are known,you are heard, you are loved and
you are so, so valued.
Speaker 1 (31:19):
We're the sons and the daughters.
Let us sing our freedom.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
(31:49):
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
(32:12):
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
You split the sea so I couldwalk right through it.
My fears are drowned in perfectlove.
You rescued me and I will standand sing.
I am a child of God.
You split the sea so I couldwalk right through it.
(32:39):
You drowned my fears in perfectlove.
You rescued me and I will standand say I am a child of God.
(33:01):
Yes, I am, I am a child of God.
I am a child of God.
I am a child of God.
Yes, I am.
I am a child of God, full offaith.
Yes, I am a child of God.
(33:31):
I am a child of God.
I'm no longer a slave to fear.
I am a child of God.
(33:55):
I'm no longer a slave to fear.
I am a child of God.
I'm no longer a slave to fear.
I am a child of God.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Hey everybody, and welcome back to the Wednesdays
with Watson podcast.
I am so excited to be here andI thank you for your time.
As I've said many times on thispodcast, time is something that
we're not getting more of, andso thank you for spending some
of yours here with me today.
Speaking of today, we start ourseries on intergenerational
trauma.
It's a big word, but basicallyit is.
(00:37):
Why do we do some of the thingswe do?
Why do we act some of the wayswe act?
Why do we have some of themedical issues that we have,
when seemingly there is noreason for it?
Intergenerational trauma is aphenomena that is real, it is
biblical, it is scientific, andso today we are going to step
into that realm, helping usunderstand how the trauma of
(01:01):
those that came before us canaffect us and what to do about
it.
The Bible says that God keepshis loving kindness for
thousands.
He forgives iniquities,transgressions and sins, yet he
will by no means leave theguilty unpunished, visiting the
iniquity of the fathers on thechildren and on the
grandchildren to the third andfourth generations.
(01:23):
We know that trauma will affectthroughout the generation, and
so I'd love to drop into thisepisode and talk to you today
about intergenerational trauma,and we will provide a whole
series on this withrepresentatives from everybody,
from the silent generation tomaybe generation alpha if I can
(01:43):
find one old enough to come on.
But we're going to talk aboutthis, we're going to understand
how trauma through thegenerations affects us and what
we can do about it.
So let's step in to thisepisode on intergenerational
trauma.
So what exactly is generationaltrauma?
(02:03):
This is also known, as youheard me say, as
intergenerational trauma.
This is the passing down oftrauma responses from one
generation to another.
It's not just about anexperience.
It's about the way that theexperiences of the previous
generations, especiallytraumatic ones, become imprinted
(02:26):
on subsequent generations andbecause of that it shapes our
beliefs, our behaviors and evenour physical health.
So generational trauma can stemfrom a range of experience that
we think about and we'll findout a lot about this when we
interview mom McGowan especiallyfrom the silent generation and
maybe even the baby boomers,because they had some major
(02:47):
historical events in their lives.
Both of those generations hadwar.
We think back to slavery andtalk to people that belong to
the black and brown community.
Slavery generations back areaffecting those people today.
The Holocaust is another one,even systematic oppression
within a country.
(03:07):
So these are big things, right.
These aren't familial traumasthat happen.
But the same thing happens whenthere's familial trauma, when
there is just something justbeing completely replicated from
generation to generation.
These kinds of things thataffect us from an
intergenerational standpoint arenot isolated incidents.
They're events that leave adeep imprint not only on the
(03:31):
people who directly experienceit, but their descendants too,
just like that verse in Exodustold us.
Trauma is not just an emotionalresponse to an event.
It can and does we talked aboutmany times on this podcast
create lasting changes in howour brains work and how our
bodies respond to stress, andeven how our genes and our DNA
(03:52):
are expressed, and so we'll talkabout this in a few minutes.
But trauma turns on and offcertain genes, and that, in an
essence, causes issues, and Ihad a great example of that in
that I have celiac disease, andit wasn't until I was in my
mid-30s that that was diagnosedor that I even began to have
problems with it.
(04:13):
And celiac disease is a genethat I inherited.
It was there but it was notturned on, and so I was not
responding like people withceliac disease does.
But about my mid-30s, that genegot turned on.
It's a perfect example of howtrauma is passed down from
generation to generation and howour genes and basically our
(04:33):
genes are what tells our bodywhat to do grow blonde hair,
grow red hair, be tall, be shortthose kinds of things can be
affected and especially immuneresponses can be affected.
So it's not just an emotionalresponse to an event.
It can and does create lastingchanges to both our brains and
our bodies.
Let's talk about how that.
Before we get into how trauma ispassed down, I want to take a
(04:54):
minute to just review whathappens when an individual
experiences trauma.
And remember we define traumaon this podcast as anything that
pushes somebody outside oftheir window of tolerance, their
ability to cope, their capacity.
There's a bunch of scientificwords we can put here, but
trauma is when something pushessomebody outside their ability
(05:15):
to deal with a normal situationor with a traumatic situation.
When a person undergoes thesetraumatic experiences, we know
that the body gets flooded withthose stress hormones cortisol
and adrenaline and short term,puts us in that fight or flight
mode, that cheetah mode that wetalk about so often on this
podcast, where the cheetah isthe fastest animal in the world.
(05:36):
They will run until they can't,because, when threatened, they
get these dumps of especiallyadrenaline and can run fast in
short distances, and so it doescatch up with us.
But for those of experienceprolonged and repeated trauma,
the body and the brain get wiredto stay in a heightened state
of vigilance, and this is whathappened to me when I ended up
(05:58):
in the hospital in 2008.
My body was wired to constantlybe on guard.
My body was wired to constantlybe on guard, my brain was wired
to constantly be on guard andthat was exhibiting itself in
nightmares and flashbacks andand isolating behavior and
self-medicating behavior,because the brain just was on
(06:18):
alert all the time.
If you could imagine those ofus that live in Florida and were
just recently hit by HurricaneMilton that state of vigilance
all the time.
And so, because I was there, Iended up with a complete nervous
breakdown in the hospitalbecause my brain had learned,
because of the trauma that I hadbeen through the 34 years
previously, to stay in thatfight or flight because it
(06:39):
always thought that my body wasgoing to die.
This definitely leaves a markand in my case it turned on that
gene for celiac disease andmany other things, but it also
can affect sleep patterns.
Immunity that's whereautoimmune diseases come in.
Oftentimes, when there's trauma,severely impacts the nervous
system, making it more difficultto regulate emotions and manage
(07:02):
stress.
This should sound familiar toyou guys.
We spend a lot of time talkingabout regulating nervous systems
.
On this podcast.
There is an episode just acouple back with my friend
Lauren Stearns.
We talk about when the bodytalks and how to understand when
your nervous system isdysregulated.
And again, that nervous systemcauses these health problems
that we talked about.
(07:23):
That dysregulated nervoussystem causes those health
issues, causes an abundance ofthings.
And, don't forget, your brainis fundamentally changing.
I want to stop here just toremind you about your brain
Without getting too scientific-y.
Remember, if you hold your handup and put your thumb in the
middle and put your four fingersdown, when those four fingers
are down, that is yourprefrontal cortex, that is what
(07:44):
helps us makeal cortex, that iswhat helps us make good
decisions, that's what helps usstay appropriate, that's what
helps us live a quote normallife.
When trauma happens, dr DanSiegel says we flip our lid.
So now, if you have your handlike that, flip your four
fingers up and now it's likeyour thumb is in the middle of
your palm, and your thumb thenrepresents your hippocampus and
(08:04):
your amygdala.
Remember now, you're beingruled by these two anatomical
parts of your brain and you'rein the prefrontal cortex.
The part of your brain thathelps you make sense of things
is not online, and so long-termtrauma can actually change the
structure of both thehippocampus, which is involved
in memory, and so you're notremembering those things
(08:26):
properly, or you might not evenremember how to get to the bank
when you're in trauma brain.
It may also shrink due to thischronic stress.
When you have generationaltrauma and your brain is on
overload, the amygdala, the onethat is responsible for fear
responses might becomeoverreactive, leading to being
afraid of everything and allkinds of situations that aren't
threatening.
(08:46):
And so you understand how traumaeven not your trauma if it's
affected someone in your family,it is likely to affect you.
It's something very interestingto think about as we talk about
how trauma has passed fromgeneration to generation.
Think about a mom, a soon-to-bemom, who is pregnant with a
girl.
But mom, back when she was 10,12, 13 years old, experienced
(09:13):
significant trauma.
12, 13 years old experiencesignificant trauma.
It has been proven that thattrauma that she experiences
earlier in life not only affectsher brain, but it changes her
reproductive structure, and soher, her eggs are actually
affected by the trauma.
And so then that means the babyis affected by the trauma, and
(09:35):
if that baby is a girl, her eggsare affected by the trauma.
So you can see how,scientifically, when the mom has
experienced trauma, herreproductive eggs are affected
by the trauma and it's going tochange some of the ways that the
DNA acts in her children.
And then, if she has girls,their eggs too are affected.
(09:58):
As of right now, there's noscientific studies on the sperm
and whether or not traumaaffects the way those genes are
expressed, but for sure we knowthat reproductive eggs are
affected and females with traumawhen it's passed down from
generation to generation,especially from female to female
(10:18):
.
And so these brain changes thathappen as a result of trauma
have a lasting impact and, likeI said, can be passed down
through what's calledepigenetics, which is what I
just explained to you.
This refers to the way thegenes express themselves.
Like I said, genes say hey, betall, be short, have blonde hair
, have red hair, don't have thisdisease, don't have this
(10:40):
disease, that kind of thing.
And so trauma will change theway the body acts.
It doesn't involve changes toyour actual DNA sequence, so
that's always the same, but itdoes affect the way those genes
behave and all of the realmsthat I talked about, but
particularly immunity.
Basically, it's how theenvironment influences the genes
(11:01):
that we're born with.
Trauma can lead to epigeneticmarkers that essentially turn
certain genes on or off, likewhat happened to me, and those
markers can be passed down toour children, meaning they will
inherit the predisposition for aheightened stress response or
mental health issues withoutdirectly experiencing the trauma
.
Now I know what some of you arethinking like.
(11:21):
Oh man, I had trauma as a kidand I've had kids.
What have I done to my ownchildren?
And so I want to provide hopefor you, because the same hope
that we always provide on thispodcast is true here too.
It just means that I hope thatthis podcast episode helps you
do two things.
First of all, address yourtrauma.
Secondly, address how yourtrauma has affected your
children, and particularly ifyour children are overly anxious
(11:44):
, overly afraid separation,anxiety look and see if some of
that could be possibly some ofyour trauma being passed down to
them.
And certainly there's help andhope and all the things.
That's why we do this podcastthat this is not meant to make
you feel badly if you alreadyhave children and you experience
trauma as a child.
But they do get thispredisposition for heightened
(12:05):
stress response and or mentalhealth issues without directly
experiencing the trauma.
And there's also I want to justkind of plug in here vicarious
trauma.
A lot of times, children, evenknowing that we experience
trauma, by us talking about itaround them in an improper way,
is also something that could bevicariously affecting them.
(12:26):
Now you might wonder how exactlygenerational trauma shows up.
If someone didn't experiencethe trauma that their
grandparents went through, whywould they still feel its
effects?
So, without getting tooscientific, one of the ways that
that generational traumamanifests is through parenting
styles and family dynamics.
Right, and so if a parentexperienced trauma, they might
(12:47):
have a higher tendency towardsbehaviors like hypervigilance,
emotional unavailability andoverprotection.
This is what happened to me, Ibelieve.
I don't know my mom's wholestory, but she was all of those
things she was anxious, she washypervigilant, she was
emotionally unavailable, she wasnot overprotective, but she was
all of those other things.
And this leads me to believe asI walk through my early
(13:10):
childhood and many people ask mehow I can forgive her or how I
can even be okay.
It's that age-old question thatsomebody penned so long ago.
Instead of what's wrong withyou is what happened to you, and
I don't know what happened tomy mom that pushed her trauma
onto me, and I never will thisside of heaven.
But I think those of you thatmight be out there that are
(13:31):
listening to me under the soundof my voice, that are
hypervigilant, that do strugglewith anxiety, emotional
unavailability, codependence,many of those things you might
need to look and see ifsomething has been
unintentionally passed down,especially as it pertains to
fears and anxieties.
And a good example of that ischildren in the Holocaust
survivors, which would be goshthat could.
(13:54):
That could range from thesilent generation maybe into a
little bit of the baby boomers,but those people, those
survivors, have been found tocarry unique anxieties and fears
linked to scarcity and survival.
The same goes for theirdescendants of those experience
who experienced forced slavery,like African American community
(14:14):
for sure, and so survivors ofthe Holocaust and survivors of
many wars and all of thosethings are going to have effects
from it.
There is a phrase coined afterthe Holocaust, where many
survivors really struggled andcounselors were telling them the
war is over.
Remember, the war is over andwe have to help our people that
(14:37):
have been affected bygenerational trauma understand
that not only is the war over,but the war was never theirs and
that we need to address whathas affected them, just by
nature of being a descendant ofsomebody who saw some of those
things.
Generational trauma also canappear in patterns of behavior
like self-sabotage, lowself-esteem and fear of just
(14:59):
about anything.
These behaviors arise as copingmechanisms for stress, and when
these mechanisms or lack ofmechanisms, coping mechanisms
are ingrained in the familyculture, they're passed down,
sometimes without explanation,and so we do have to kind of
examine ourselves if we havechildren, and examine whether we
(15:19):
are creating a culture insideour home of anxiety and fear and
emotional unavailability andother trauma responses that we
are passing down to them justbecause it's in our home and as
a double--dutch issue there,because they also have the gene
expression change that traumadoes that we talked about.
There are some specific formsof generational trauma and it
(15:42):
does manifest differentlyObviously racial trauma.
So for individuals frommarginalized racial or ethnic
backgrounds, this generationaltrauma is often tied to systemic
discrimination or forcedmigration.
You think of our NativeAmericans, the kind of trauma
that they passed down fromgeneration to generation.
In many cases, this trauma islinked to both historical
(16:04):
oppression, like I just talkedabout, and ongoing racism, like
is often true with our AfricanAmerican friends.
There is war trauma.
Descendants of those who livedthrough wars this is
particularly going to be true ofthe baby boomers, such as the
Vietnam War, world War II.
You may express heightenedanxiety even if there weren't
directly impacted events.
(16:24):
I'm going to talk to MamaGallen, who is part of the
silent generation and she wasalive during both World War II
and Korea and Vietnam for thatmatter, but I definitely want to
talk to her about herexperiences.
She also lived through theGreat Depression, and so how did
that affect how she lived herlife and did she see some of
those changes in her children?
(16:45):
And so that's going to be areally interesting conversation.
And then the baby boomers willtalk to you about Vietnam War
and then Gen X.
Significant events in ourgeneration are many, including
the shooting at Columbine, whichat the time was just
unfathomable to anybody that wasalive during that time.
(17:05):
We just had never known such athing.
And then particularly, and then, especially September the 11th,
everybody remembers where theywere, and those are just a
couple out of Gen X that I canthink of.
We will talk to the millennials.
That's going to be interestingbecause I think we're going to
see a shift in how these thingsare experienced between
Generation X and the millennials.
(17:27):
After the millennials we willtalk to Gen Z and then after Gen
Z, we will talk to the oldestof Generation Alpha, and it's
going to be really interestingas we watch how each generation
walked through these things thathappened in their lifetime,
like racial trauma, like wartrauma.
There's also obviously familytrauma that happens like abusive
dynamics inside the home.
(17:48):
That's probably persisted overgeneration after generation
after generation, and guys, it'sjust time to stop the madness.
There's also immigrant trauma.
For immigrants and theirdescendants, that's going to
become more of a thing,especially in the United States.
Trauma may come from sacrificesand hardships.
You think of people whomigrated into the United States.
(18:08):
Regardless of how you feelabout that, if they landed in
this country, they are going tohave experienced trauma both
above them epigenetics and inthem, and then obviously passing
it on to their children becauseof just what they have to do to
emigrate to another country,and this would be true of
immigrants from all over theworld, really.
(18:30):
And then environmental traumapeople who come from regions
that have been affected bynatural disasters or an
environmental destruction canproduce generational trauma.
I want to stop here because,gosh, the eastern seaboard has
been hit hard in the last coupleof months by natural disasters,
and so if you have children, itis important for you guys to
(18:51):
address what we just all wentthrough, and even if that means
getting them professional help.
We know that one of the C's onthis podcast is counseling, but
definitely have to address it.
We want to recognize that thefaster we address these things
and counseling and even justknowing about it listening to
this podcast huge in recognizinggenerational trauma.
(19:13):
So you might wonder do I havegenerational trauma?
And this is a challengingquestion because sometimes these
things are deeply ingrained inwho we are.
That feels normal Like.
Sometimes you might go tosomebody else's house and go oh,
y'all don't do it that way,this is the way we do it, and so
it is hard, but there's somequestions to ask yourself.
So it is hard, but there's somequestions to ask yourself Are
(19:34):
there patterns in your familythat seem harmful or limiting?
No-transcript.
Are there patterns in yourfamily that seem harmful or
limiting, even if you don't knowwhy they exist?
Do you have fears or anxietiesthat don't make any sense to you
, like they seem disappropriateto any experience that you've
(19:57):
ever had?
Do they rule you?
I'm not talking about beingafraid of height.
I'm talking about everydayfears and anxieties that are
like you can't explain, becausethere's no reason in your
explanation for you to havethese fears and anxieties.
Remember brain changes, pfcoffline.
Be enrolled by your fear center.
Are there family stories oftrauma that seem to affect
(20:21):
family members in subtle andunexplained ways?
And I would say to those of youlistening, this would be true
for your spouse too, especiallyif you have children.
This might help you understandsome things and I'm not trying
to start a fight, but it mightbe an opportunity, an open door
for you guys to get some help Ifyou both are being affected by
intergenerational trauma or justone of you are either way.
(20:44):
Awareness, curiosity.
If I added another C to thispodcast, it would be that
Counseling, community, churchand curiosity.
Get curious, journal, think,write down things, get to
counseling.
But awareness is that hugefirst step and the way to be
aware is to be curious.
Once we recognize that ourstruggles might be tied to
(21:06):
generational trauma, you have noidea how free you will feel.
Be aware is to be curious.
Once we recognize that ourstruggles might be tied to
generational trauma, you have noidea how free you will feel.
I remember learning thisconcept and thinking like.
I'll give you guys a greatexample.
It was in our home.
There was a great culture offear of everything before I was
taken away from my mom when Iwas 12 years old, and that still
affects me today, particularlylike when I drive.
(21:28):
My mom never drove a day in herlife because she was always too
anxious to drive and that gotpassed down to me Because when I
drive, if I'm in traffic orsomething like that, I sometimes
will have a full on panicattack when I'm driving.
And I never understood thatbefore because I didn't have any
reason to be so anxious when Idrove and but when I understood
that her fear and her anxietyand the fact that I watched that
(21:49):
, so not only was my geneexpressions changed and so I was
probably born somebody notfearful and or not without a
proclivity for anxiety, butbecause she had great anxiety,
that got passed on to me and thedriving as just one example of
that.
But here's the hope.
(22:10):
But, jesus, because we can healfrom generational trauma.
Healing from it can beincredibly powerful, not only
for ourselves but for thosegenerations to come.
We can stop it right.
We can stop our children fromreproducing our fears, our
anxieties or any other way thattrauma is showing up in our
lives.
There are many, many ways toheal from generational trauma,
(22:32):
and we talked about many ofthese, but you do need to get
into some counseling.
There's one trauma modalitythat we've not talked about a
lot on this podcast there's anold, old episode about internal
family systems.
That is a phenomenal one forgenerational trauma, because
what internal family systemsdoes is helps you identify which
(22:53):
part of you is showing up andthe behavior that you don't like
, and why and how to address it.
Emdr, which is we've talkedabout a lot, is growing more and
more in popularity.
It is the modality that I choseand it was an amazing, as it
continues to be experienced, forthe identification and the
treatment of behaviors that Idon't want in my life.
(23:16):
There is somatic experiencing,which is paying attention to
your body and and addressing thetrauma that way.
There's also something calledcognitive behavior therapy,
which helps you change the wayyou think about things.
So you may think I am soanxious, I suck, I'm never going
to be able to do anything.
Cognitive behavior therapytakes that thought and turns it
around to what is true is thatyou don't suck, that you're a
(23:38):
valuable child of the Most HighGod and that this stuff can be
worked through.
You just got to change the wayyou think about it.
And I think of Philippians 4.8when I think about cognitive
behavior therapy.
Is it good, is it true?
Is it excellent?
Is it praiseworthy?
Is it good report?
Think on these things.
Philippians 4.8 says Workingwith a therapist or counselor
(23:58):
can help individuals identifyand process emotions that don't
even feel like yours.
And that's the thing aboutgenerational trauma.
Trauma is very confusing.
Family therapies can be avaluable tool as it allows all
the family members to healtogether, breaking down patterns
and addressing shared trauma.
(24:19):
And let me tell you that Satanwould like nothing less than for
you to go to family therapy andfor the entire family to come
together as one and address theway that trauma before them has
affected the entire familydynamic.
Family therapy a valuable toolwhen we're talking about
generational trauma or behaviorsthat are happening inside the
home and nobody knows why.
Family therapy.
(24:40):
It can be invaluable to helpeverybody understand.
If I added another C to thispodcast, it would be compassion
for yourself and forgiveness ofothers.
These play a role in healinggenerational trauma.
Compassion for yourself so manytimes when we don't understand
why we behave, why we behave, weare the critics of ourselves
(25:05):
and get mad at ourselves foracting a certain way or doing a
certain thing, when in fact,what we need is some compassion
and curiosity for why we act theway we do.
Is it because it was passeddown to me and this has nothing
to do with anything that'shappened to me?
We also have to add inforgiveness.
We have a whole series onforgiving trauma makers.
Forgiveness plays a huge role instopping generational trauma.
(25:28):
We have to acknowledge the painright and acknowledge that our
ancestors, and in my case, mymom, did the best they could
with the knowledge and resourcesthey had.
Again, it's asking thatquestion about those that came
before you not why did you dowhat you do, but what happened
to you.
Why did you do what you do, butwhat happened to you.
What happened to you and thatcompassion of others will lead
(25:56):
you into a heart of forgivenesswhen you look at those that came
before you, whether they harmedyou directly or not, but you
certainly are being affected bytheir trauma.
Instead of saying what's wrongwith you, what happened to you,
when we choose this compassion,we can release resentment and
heal parts of ourselves thathave felt burdened all of your
life and you don't know why.
(26:16):
Really, though, after that,after you're okay, it's time to
break the cycle of generationaltrauma.
What do you want to pass downto your children?
Is it anxiety?
Is it fear?
Is it being ruled with your PFCoffline?
Is it codependency?
(26:39):
Is it abuse?
And when I say abuse, I meanfood, people, drugs, alcohol.
What are they seeing in yourhome?
What do you want to pass down?
Do you need to get to acounselor so that you can stop
(26:59):
the trauma from affecting yourchildren?
These are sober questions foryou to ask if you have children
in your home.
It's never too late to break thecycle of generational trauma,
because the fact of the matteris is each step we take to
process and heal from trauma isa step towards a different
future for ourselves, ourchildren and even our
(27:20):
communities.
Think about that, like you areraising future members of our
community.
We want them to be the bestmembers of that community that
we can and we become more awareof our triggers and patterns.
Then we choose to address themand commit to a new way of
thinking and responding.
You are not only healingyourself, but you're creating a
(27:42):
healthier foundation foreverybody that comes after you
with your DNA.
This is the work of a lifetime.
It is not easy, but when weunderstand and address
generational trauma, we take thepower out of it.
Say that again when weunderstand generational trauma,
we take the power out of it.
(28:03):
We choose not to be defined byit, but we get our sword and we
go fight.
We fight in a counselor'soffice, we fight on our knees,
we fight in our community, andthen we get defined by our
resilience.
We get defined by our capacityfor love and we move into a
(28:26):
growth period that we may neversee coming, because, guys, you
see, we are no longer slaves tothose things that are meant to
destroy us.
We just aren't, because Jesuscame so that we might have life
and that we might have it moreabundantly.
Have it more abundantly, andbecause of that we have the
(28:51):
opportunity to heal.
We don't have to continually bedefined by those things that
happen before us.
We are no longer slaves.
Think about that.
Think about that Because heunravels us with a melody.
He surrounds us with a song.
That song is of deliverancefrom our enemies, satan, who
(29:17):
wants us to be ruled by thisgenerational trauma.
But God surrounds us with asong of deliverance until all
our fears are gone, because weare no longer a slave to fear.
We are children of God.
We know that from our mother'swomb, he has chosen us and love
(29:41):
has called our name.
We are born again into aperfect family and his blood
flows through our veins.
So we are no longer a slave tofear.
We are a child of God.
No longer slaves to fear, guys.
We are liberated from ourbondage.
(30:02):
We're sons and daughters.
Let us sing in the freedom.
We are children and daughters.
Let us sing in the freedom.
We are children of God.
Guys, be no longer slaves togenerational trauma.
Take Jesus' words as they are,as truth is that he has come to
(30:23):
give us life and give us a lifethat is abundant and free.
To give us life and give us alife that is abundant and free.
Okay, guys, thank you so muchfor listening.
We will be back in two weeksand all fingers and toes and all
the things are crossed that wewill have an episode with Mama
Gowron that represents thesilent generation.
(30:44):
I hope you guys learnedsomething today.
I hope that you have anactionable item and if you have
any questions for me, I'm happyto answer them.
You can just send me a textmessage right there in the show
notes.
I am the only one that seesthat.
I imagine this episode willpromote a lot of questions and
I'm here for it, and so shoot mea text message through the
(31:05):
podcast and I will be happy toanswer the questions in the best
way I can.
We will see you back here intwo weeks and until then, you
know what I'm going to say.
You are seen, you are known,you are heard, you are loved and
you are so, so valued.
Speaker 1 (31:19):
We're the sons and the daughters.
Let us sing our freedom.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
(31:49):
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
(32:12):
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
You split the sea so I couldwalk right through it.
My fears are drowned in perfectlove.
You rescued me and I will standand sing.
I am a child of God.
You split the sea so I couldwalk right through it.
(32:39):
You drowned my fears in perfectlove.
You rescued me and I will standand say I am a child of God.
(33:01):
Yes, I am, I am a child of God.
I am a child of God.
I am a child of God.
Yes, I am.
I am a child of God, full offaith.
Yes, I am a child of God.
(33:31):
I am a child of God.
I'm no longer a slave to fear.
I am a child of God.
(33:55):
I'm no longer a slave to fear.
I am a child of God.
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