Episode Transcript
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Speaker 2 (00:06):
Sometimes I win the battle, sometimes I lose.
At times I feel Christ'spresence flooding my meager
heart.
At other times I cling on fordear life, not knowing the end
of the story.
But I must stake my life onthis claim that Jesus is the
resurrection and the life.
Today we are going to step intoone of the hardest questions
(00:38):
people ask about faith and aboutGod.
How could a loving God allowsuffering?
And about God how could aloving God allow suffering?
You see, the question is notnew, it is an ancient one.
But for us it has to be morethan just an intellectual
exercise.
It has to be personal, becausesuffering has a way of pressing
into the deepest parts of oursoul.
(01:00):
That quote that I opened thepodcast with is by Rebecca
McLaughlin, who wrote a bookcalled Confronting Christianity.
In this book, rebecca asks someof the most difficult questions
, in an indictment if you will,in a way, about God and his
sovereignty and whether or nothe's real and why some of the
(01:21):
things in the Christian faithare confusing, like suffering,
and so I'll read that one moretime.
Sometimes I win the battle,sometimes I lose.
At times I feel Christ'spresence flooding my meager
heart.
At other times I cling on fordear life, not knowing the end
of the story, but I must.
I must stake my claim on thisthat Jesus is the resurrection
(01:47):
and the life.
Welcome everybody to theWednesdays with Watson podcast.
Take a moment where are youtoday in your relationship with
suffering?
Are you clinging on?
Are you resting?
Wherever you are, wherever youare, you are not alone.
(02:16):
Let's do a little bit of asurvey of suffering in the
scripture.
This is not meant to be allencompassing by any means, but I
wanted to us just highlightsome suffering in the Bible and
some reasons why it appears tohave happened.
We know that Job, of course,the most potentially famous
example of them all.
Job suffered for no apparentreason.
(02:38):
Right, job lost everything hisfamily, his health, his wealth,
and he never received an answerto why.
It reminds me of the old forhim song called why, and there's
a lyric in that song that saysI know down here, I may not
understand, but I won't let goof your unseen hand.
(03:04):
When we think of Job, we thinkof a verse that I will mention a
lot in this podcast 2Corinthians 4, 17,.
For our momentary lightaffliction is producing for us
an incomparable weight of glory.
It wasn't meaningless.
As John Piper says in thatfamous monologue in the Shane
(03:24):
and Shane song Though you SlayMe, when your pain feels
meaningless, you can whisper toGod.
I do not see it now, but Itrust that you are producing
something in me.
(03:46):
We jump over to David, where wesee that maybe some of David's
suffering became so because ofsin, particularly his sin and
the sin of others.
David's life shows us that sinand suffering can be connected,
not necessarily in proportion.
Jesus corrected that thinkingin John 9 when he said the blind
(04:06):
man's suffering wasn't becauseof his sin but it was because
God's work could be displayedBack to that 2nd Corinthians 4,
17.
It is producing something in useternally.
But the fact of the matter is,guys, guys, is that sometimes
sin happens and sometimessuffering happens as a result of
(04:29):
other people's sin.
I know, when I think about thelowest moments of my life, that
suffering was because somebodyelse sinned and that affected me
.
And so, as you are thinkingabout Job, who had suffered for
no apparent reason to us anyway,and David, who caused suffering
(04:51):
and then himself suffered, ifyou're thinking about your
suffering and how it was at thehands of another person, know
that we see that in the Bible,jesus promised that we were
going to have suffering.
And we know, because we havefree will, that we were going to
have suffering.
And we know, because we havefree will, that we're going to
have suffering.
Sometimes that's the worstsuffering to try to recover from
(05:13):
when we're suffering becausesomebody else hurt us, somebody
else sinned.
When you think of Paul, paulsuffered smack dab in the middle
of the will of God.
How many times have you feltlike, okay, god, you can give me
a break.
I am trying to follow you, yetyou're still allowing all of
these things to come into mylife.
(05:33):
We see that Paul suffered smackdab in the will of God.
His thorn in the flesh led himto say my strength or my grace
is sufficient for you.
My power or my strength is madeperfect in weakness.
That song reminds me of the oldStephen Curtis Chapman song.
(05:54):
His strength is perfect.
When our strength is gone.
He'll carry us when we can'tcarry on.
Where are you weak right now?
Are you suffering?
Smack dab in the middle of thewill of God?
Can you be like the psalmistthat said my heart and my flesh
fail, but God is my portionforever?
(06:16):
Can you ask God to let hispower rest on you in this time
of suffering.
In this time of suffering.
We know that Jesus is theultimate picture of suffering
and Jesus suffered with purpose.
And, guys, that is you right.
Nothing is wasted.
It is working for us in aneternal sense of glory.
(06:38):
Your pain is not wasted.
Jesus' pain was not wasted.
We see in Isaiah 53, he waspierced for our transgressions
and by his stripes we are healed.
So, as you're listening to thispodcast and you're thinking of
your darkest moments, can yousit with the fact that Jesus
suffered for you and for me?
(06:59):
He suffered the ultimate foryou and for me.
What does that do for yourheart when you know that we do
not serve a high priest who isunfamiliar with our suffering?
I went to Facebook on thisquestion because this subject is
something that I had theopportunity to teach at church,
(07:21):
and I asked people this questionhow could a loving God allow
suffering?
And here are some of theresponses.
Somebody wrote this is what Iwould love to know.
I can't take anymore.
Is that you today?
Somebody said so.
(07:42):
Basically, the negative thingsthat happen are purposeful and
are meant to shape us positively.
It's basically an obstaclecourse.
Somebody else said we live in abroken world and he's warned us
of that.
The earth is broken, theweather is broken, healthcare is
broken, but he is sovereign andhis purpose is worth trusting
(08:06):
in.
Somebody wrote there are simplysome things that we can never
know versus simply believeoutside of the context of pain
and suffering.
Somebody said because Satan isthe prince of this world.
Somebody else wrote this is asclose to hell as a believer will
ever get.
One day, jesus will come backfor us.
(08:27):
Somebody else wrote so ourquestions aren't about his power
, but of his goodness.
If we decide that first he isgood, then we realize that our
perspective is limited.
Trust says I will believe eventhrough the pain.
Faith says I will believe whoyou are and what you say.
Somebody said I don't believethat god allows it, but he gives
(08:48):
us free will and makes thechoice to treat each other with
kindness or cruelty.
Man has rewarded him by wagingwars and exploiting people in
his name.
The kingdom of god is with, iswithin us or not.
In some cases, god is ascapegoat, she writes.
And then, finally, this mosthonest, brutally honest response
(09:09):
, I think, is where we'll landon this.
What I don't understand in thispresent world is why God allows
certain suffering to some andprotects others from it.
For example, two babies areborn with the same heart
condition.
One dies, the other lives.
One woman is blessed with ahusband and children.
The other never sees thosedesires fulfilled.
(09:30):
One child is born into a familythat loves and cares for them.
Another is born into one thatneglects them.
Two people beg God for healingfrom a physical or mental
illness.
One gets a miracle and theother suffers every day of their
life.
It's so hard to wrap my mindaround this, and I've wrestled
through the things with the Lord.
But in the midst of all thethings that I don't know or
(09:51):
understand, what I do know isthat if God allows suffering to
come into someone's life, nomatter what the cause, whether
it be the result of the fall,the enemy's sin of the one
suffering or the some case ofsomebody else, or even, when we
need discipline from the hand ofGod himself, that he uses
suffering, all of it, toaccomplish his good purpose,
(10:11):
it's never for nothing.
And when we are tempted to lookat suffering and wonder why God
is not doing something about it, to know that he has already
done something about it, that hesent his own son to suffer for
us so that we would have theopportunity to come to know him
and be delivered from theultimate suffering of living for
all eternity without him.
And soon, and very soon, hewill put an end to all the
(10:33):
suffering for his children.
And the extreme heaviness wefeel from our suffering now will
feel so insignificant whencompared to the weight of glory
that is coming for those whobelong to Jesus.
No matter how heavy oursuffering has been here, the
glory that is coming will faroutweigh them.
All these honest responses, Ithink, help us process it
(10:58):
ourselves, because suffering isnot just a theology, it is a
lived reality.
Another person wrote at age 12,someone.
I experienced unspeakabletrauma and I never could
reconcile it with a loving God.
I've become agnostic.
My faith was shaken, and maybeone of these responses that I've
read is you.
(11:18):
Maybe you're there now.
Stories like this remind usthat children are harmed,
families break apart, people welove die too soon, and sometimes
it can feel a little bitunbearable to call that loving.
But back to that John Pipermonologue.
In that song, though you SlayMe, john Piper once said every
(11:40):
millisecond of your pain isproducing a peculiar sense of
glory you will get because ofthat suffering.
Every millisecond of your painis producing something.
If it feels meaningless today,can you ask God to show you,
even in a small way, what itmight be producing?
(12:00):
Because the Bible is not silenton suffering.
Suffering is promised.
We see that in John 16, 33,where Jesus says In this world
you will have trouble, but takeheart, for I have overcome the
world.
We see in Romans 8, thesuffering is universal.
That verse that I keep readingin 2 Corinthians 4, 17,.
Suffering is purposeful, it isproducing something.
(12:24):
It draws us near to Jesusbecause we do not serve a high
priest unfamiliar with oursuffering.
That's the Hebrews 4.15 verse.
Suffering points us to hopebecause all things will be made
new.
Christianity is unique in thesense that we don't suffer a God
distant from pain, as I'vementioned so many times on this
(12:44):
podcast Hebrews 4.15.
We serve a Savior who enteredit, who knows it and who redeems
it.
Can we say, jesus, I thank youthat you are not distant from
suffering?
Thank you that you bore ityourself.
Help me to trust that you arewith me.
Those questions that I askonline.
(13:05):
Everybody had their own answer,but ultimately you have to find
your answer to it.
Do you believe that sufferingshapes us positively?
Do you believe that we live ina broken world, but God is
sovereign?
Do you believe that this worldis not your home, that this is
as close to hell as a believerwill ever get?
(13:27):
Can you say?
I don't understand why twopeople with the same story can
ask the same God for the samething and get different things,
and I don't understand that.
But God is sovereign.
Can you find your way in thesemoments of suffering, in these
moments of pain, in thesemoments of suffering, in these
moments of pain, and to likeJacob, wrestled with the angel.
(13:47):
He spent time with God and saidI will not let go until you
bless me.
And Jacob walked away with alimp.
Jacob walked away with a holylimp.
Guys, I encourage you to get into the ring and wrestle with
your faith, because God canhandle it, as we saw with Jacob,
(14:10):
who said I will not let gountil you bless me.
It reminds me of a time whenI've shared so many times on
this podcast.
It is September of 2025.
And in September of 2008, Iattempted to take my life.
It is National SuicideAwareness Month.
I did not want to be here.
The pain had simply overtakenme.
I remember sliding down a wallin that dark apartment and just
(14:35):
wanting to end it all, wantingto be gone, but in that moment,
god came and he understood thatI just needed help in human form
, and people came along to helpme.
That was maybe the only time inmy life when I've ever
struggled with my faith and,instead of indicting a holy
(14:56):
loving God, in those moments, inthose darkest moments of my
life, I was able to see thesovereignty of God.
I was able to articulate Idon't understand what you're
doing, but I know that you willperfect all that concerns me.
That started me on a journey, avery, very long journey of
getting better and getting tothe place where I am today,
(15:17):
where, in September of 2025,instead of being in a hospital
for my own psychiatric breakdownfor lack of a better way to
explain that I'm helping peoplewho are not as far along on
their journey because he willperfect all that concerns me and
I want him to use the thingsthat have happened to further
(15:39):
the gospel, and I hope that thispodcast has done this today.
If you're under the sound of myvoice, I do not make light of
your pain, but I do tell you.
I hope that you can look at thepeople who have gone before you
and don't go to the dark places, because ultimately, where I
landed with all of my sufferingis that God is good.
Jesus loves me.
This I know, for the Bibletells me.
(16:02):
So I belong to him, you belongto him.
I was having this conversationwith some people at work the
other day.
A friend of mine who herhusband, asked her why does Amy
believe in God?
And my friend said to him she'shad a hard life, she can have
(16:23):
her God.
May it be so that one day, wheneverybody looks at all the
things that have happened in ourlives, may it be so that we
trusted God with that pain andwe allowed it to be used by him.
I don't say that to be triteand to try to make light of your
(16:43):
pain.
I only know that at the end ofthe day, when the wrestling
match happens with a holy God,that you will land at a place of
peace and understand that Goddid exactly what he told us it
was going to do Suffering wasgoing to be on this planet.
It is not an embarrassment toChristianity.
It is a defining moment that wewere, we could say we knew this
(17:04):
would happen.
Suffering is promised.
It is a defining moment wherewe could say we knew this would
happen.
Suffering is promised.
It is universal, it ispurposeful, it is temporary, it
links us to Jesus and it pointsus to hope.
And will you let it be themegaphone that God uses to rouse
a deaf world?
As CS Lewis once said, godwhispers in our pleasures, he
(17:25):
speaks in our conscience, but heshouts in our pain.
It is a megaphone to rouse adeaf world.
My friends, suffering may be atyour doorstep right now, it
might be in your home, butscripture tells us in that full
passage in 2 Corinthians 4,16-18,.
Therefore, therefore, do notlose heart, for our light and
(17:47):
momentary troubles are achievingfor us an eternal glory that
far outweighs them all.
So we fix our eyes on what isunseen and we trust in the Lord
with all of our hearts.
We lean not into our ownunderstanding.
(18:09):
In all of our ways weacknowledge him and, guys, then
then he will direct your path.
So, in this moment where yourflesh and your heart may fail
you, can you say, as thepsalmist says you, oh Lord, are
my strength and my portionforever.
I hope that you guys can findsome peace in your suffering,
(18:38):
knowing that it is purposeful,that it is promised and that you
are not alone.
Can you walk by faith, evenwhen you cannot see?
Guys, thank you so much forjoining me here today.
I am about one or two podcastcycles away from being done with
(19:02):
my doctorate degree.
We will rebrand at that pointand be back with brand new
episodes every two weeks.
Until then, we are in survivalmode, so I'm going to leave you
until I see you again here, andyou know what I'm going to say.
You are seen, you are known youare heard, you are loved and
you are so, so valued.
Y'all have a good one.
Speaker 1 (19:30):
I know your heart is heavy from those nights, but
just remember that you are afighter.
A fighter.
You never know just whattomorrow holds, and you're
(19:55):
stronger than you know.
Oh, you're stronger than youknow.
Hold on, don't let go.
Hold on and don't let go.
(20:17):
Just take one step closer, putone foot in front of the other.
You'll get through this.
Just follow the light One stepcloser, one foot in front of the
(20:44):
other.
You'll get through this.
Just follow the light in thedarkness.
You're gonna be okay.
You're gonna be okay.
(21:05):
You're gonna be okay.
When the night is closing in,don't give up and don't give in.
This won't last.
It's not the end.
It's not the end.
(21:26):
You're gonna be okay.
It's not the end.
You're gonna be okay.
When the night is closing in,don't give up and don't give in.
This won't last.
It's not the end.
It's not the end.
You're gonna be okay.
(21:51):
You're gonna be okay.
You're not alone, Never alone.
You're gonna be okay.
Sometimes I win the battle, sometimes I lose.
At times I feel Christ'spresence flooding my meager
heart.
At other times I cling on fordear life, not knowing the end
of the story.
But I must stake my life onthis claim that Jesus is the
resurrection and the life.
Today we are going to step intoone of the hardest questions
(00:38):
people ask about faith and aboutGod.
How could a loving God allowsuffering?
And about God how could aloving God allow suffering?
You see, the question is notnew, it is an ancient one.
But for us it has to be morethan just an intellectual
exercise.
It has to be personal, becausesuffering has a way of pressing
into the deepest parts of oursoul.
(01:00):
That quote that I opened thepodcast with is by Rebecca
McLaughlin, who wrote a bookcalled Confronting Christianity.
In this book, rebecca asks someof the most difficult questions
, in an indictment if you will,in a way, about God and his
sovereignty and whether or nothe's real and why some of the
(01:21):
things in the Christian faithare confusing, like suffering,
and so I'll read that one moretime.
Sometimes I win the battle,sometimes I lose.
At times I feel Christ'spresence flooding my meager
heart.
At other times I cling on fordear life, not knowing the end
of the story, but I must.
I must stake my claim on thisthat Jesus is the resurrection
(01:47):
and the life.
Welcome everybody to theWednesdays with Watson podcast.
Take a moment where are youtoday in your relationship with
suffering?
Are you clinging on?
Are you resting?
Wherever you are, wherever youare, you are not alone.
(02:16):
Let's do a little bit of asurvey of suffering in the
scripture.
This is not meant to be allencompassing by any means, but I
wanted to us just highlightsome suffering in the Bible and
some reasons why it appears tohave happened.
We know that Job, of course,the most potentially famous
example of them all.
Job suffered for no apparentreason.
(02:38):
Right, job lost everything hisfamily, his health, his wealth,
and he never received an answerto why.
It reminds me of the old forhim song called why, and there's
a lyric in that song that saysI know down here, I may not
understand, but I won't let goof your unseen hand.
(03:04):
When we think of Job, we thinkof a verse that I will mention a
lot in this podcast 2Corinthians 4, 17,.
For our momentary lightaffliction is producing for us
an incomparable weight of glory.
It wasn't meaningless.
As John Piper says in thatfamous monologue in the Shane
(03:24):
and Shane song Though you SlayMe, when your pain feels
meaningless, you can whisper toGod.
I do not see it now, but Itrust that you are producing
something in me.
(03:46):
We jump over to David, where wesee that maybe some of David's
suffering became so because ofsin, particularly his sin and
the sin of others.
David's life shows us that sinand suffering can be connected,
not necessarily in proportion.
Jesus corrected that thinkingin John 9 when he said the blind
(04:06):
man's suffering wasn't becauseof his sin but it was because
God's work could be displayedBack to that 2nd Corinthians 4,
17.
It is producing something in useternally.
But the fact of the matter is,guys, guys, is that sometimes
sin happens and sometimessuffering happens as a result of
(04:29):
other people's sin.
I know, when I think about thelowest moments of my life, that
suffering was because somebodyelse sinned and that affected me
.
And so, as you are thinkingabout Job, who had suffered for
no apparent reason to us anyway,and David, who caused suffering
(04:51):
and then himself suffered, ifyou're thinking about your
suffering and how it was at thehands of another person, know
that we see that in the Bible,jesus promised that we were
going to have suffering.
And we know, because we havefree will, that we were going to
have suffering.
And we know, because we havefree will, that we're going to
have suffering.
Sometimes that's the worstsuffering to try to recover from
(05:13):
when we're suffering becausesomebody else hurt us, somebody
else sinned.
When you think of Paul, paulsuffered smack dab in the middle
of the will of God.
How many times have you feltlike, okay, god, you can give me
a break.
I am trying to follow you, yetyou're still allowing all of
these things to come into mylife.
(05:33):
We see that Paul suffered smackdab in the will of God.
His thorn in the flesh led himto say my strength or my grace
is sufficient for you.
My power or my strength is madeperfect in weakness.
That song reminds me of the oldStephen Curtis Chapman song.
(05:54):
His strength is perfect.
When our strength is gone.
He'll carry us when we can'tcarry on.
Where are you weak right now?
Are you suffering?
Smack dab in the middle of thewill of God?
Can you be like the psalmistthat said my heart and my flesh
fail, but God is my portionforever?
(06:16):
Can you ask God to let hispower rest on you in this time
of suffering.
In this time of suffering.
We know that Jesus is theultimate picture of suffering
and Jesus suffered with purpose.
And, guys, that is you right.
Nothing is wasted.
It is working for us in aneternal sense of glory.
(06:38):
Your pain is not wasted.
Jesus' pain was not wasted.
We see in Isaiah 53, he waspierced for our transgressions
and by his stripes we are healed.
So, as you're listening to thispodcast and you're thinking of
your darkest moments, can yousit with the fact that Jesus
suffered for you and for me?
(06:59):
He suffered the ultimate foryou and for me.
What does that do for yourheart when you know that we do
not serve a high priest who isunfamiliar with our suffering?
I went to Facebook on thisquestion because this subject is
something that I had theopportunity to teach at church,
(07:21):
and I asked people this questionhow could a loving God allow
suffering?
And here are some of theresponses.
Somebody wrote this is what Iwould love to know.
I can't take anymore.
Is that you today?
Somebody said so.
(07:42):
Basically, the negative thingsthat happen are purposeful and
are meant to shape us positively.
It's basically an obstaclecourse.
Somebody else said we live in abroken world and he's warned us
of that.
The earth is broken, theweather is broken, healthcare is
broken, but he is sovereign andhis purpose is worth trusting
(08:06):
in.
Somebody wrote there are simplysome things that we can never
know versus simply believeoutside of the context of pain
and suffering.
Somebody said because Satan isthe prince of this world.
Somebody else wrote this is asclose to hell as a believer will
ever get.
One day, jesus will come backfor us.
(08:27):
Somebody else wrote so ourquestions aren't about his power
, but of his goodness.
If we decide that first he isgood, then we realize that our
perspective is limited.
Trust says I will believe eventhrough the pain.
Faith says I will believe whoyou are and what you say.
Somebody said I don't believethat god allows it, but he gives
(08:48):
us free will and makes thechoice to treat each other with
kindness or cruelty.
Man has rewarded him by wagingwars and exploiting people in
his name.
The kingdom of god is with, iswithin us or not.
In some cases, god is ascapegoat, she writes.
And then, finally, this mosthonest, brutally honest response
(09:09):
, I think, is where we'll landon this.
What I don't understand in thispresent world is why God allows
certain suffering to some andprotects others from it.
For example, two babies areborn with the same heart
condition.
One dies, the other lives.
One woman is blessed with ahusband and children.
The other never sees thosedesires fulfilled.
(09:30):
One child is born into a familythat loves and cares for them.
Another is born into one thatneglects them.
Two people beg God for healingfrom a physical or mental
illness.
One gets a miracle and theother suffers every day of their
life.
It's so hard to wrap my mindaround this, and I've wrestled
through the things with the Lord.
But in the midst of all thethings that I don't know or
(09:51):
understand, what I do know isthat if God allows suffering to
come into someone's life, nomatter what the cause, whether
it be the result of the fall,the enemy's sin of the one
suffering or the some case ofsomebody else, or even, when we
need discipline from the hand ofGod himself, that he uses
suffering, all of it, toaccomplish his good purpose,
(10:11):
it's never for nothing.
And when we are tempted to lookat suffering and wonder why God
is not doing something about it, to know that he has already
done something about it, that hesent his own son to suffer for
us so that we would have theopportunity to come to know him
and be delivered from theultimate suffering of living for
all eternity without him.
And soon, and very soon, hewill put an end to all the
(10:33):
suffering for his children.
And the extreme heaviness wefeel from our suffering now will
feel so insignificant whencompared to the weight of glory
that is coming for those whobelong to Jesus.
No matter how heavy oursuffering has been here, the
glory that is coming will faroutweigh them.
All these honest responses, Ithink, help us process it
(10:58):
ourselves, because suffering isnot just a theology, it is a
lived reality.
Another person wrote at age 12,someone.
I experienced unspeakabletrauma and I never could
reconcile it with a loving God.
I've become agnostic.
My faith was shaken, and maybeone of these responses that I've
read is you.
(11:18):
Maybe you're there now.
Stories like this remind usthat children are harmed,
families break apart, people welove die too soon, and sometimes
it can feel a little bitunbearable to call that loving.
But back to that John Pipermonologue.
In that song, though you SlayMe, john Piper once said every
(11:40):
millisecond of your pain isproducing a peculiar sense of
glory you will get because ofthat suffering.
Every millisecond of your painis producing something.
If it feels meaningless today,can you ask God to show you,
even in a small way, what itmight be producing?
(12:00):
Because the Bible is not silenton suffering.
Suffering is promised.
We see that in John 16, 33,where Jesus says In this world
you will have trouble, but takeheart, for I have overcome the
world.
We see in Romans 8, thesuffering is universal.
That verse that I keep readingin 2 Corinthians 4, 17,.
Suffering is purposeful, it isproducing something.
(12:24):
It draws us near to Jesusbecause we do not serve a high
priest unfamiliar with oursuffering.
That's the Hebrews 4.15 verse.
Suffering points us to hopebecause all things will be made
new.
Christianity is unique in thesense that we don't suffer a God
distant from pain, as I'vementioned so many times on this
(12:44):
podcast Hebrews 4.15.
We serve a Savior who enteredit, who knows it and who redeems
it.
Can we say, jesus, I thank youthat you are not distant from
suffering?
Thank you that you bore ityourself.
Help me to trust that you arewith me.
Those questions that I askonline.
(13:05):
Everybody had their own answer,but ultimately you have to find
your answer to it.
Do you believe that sufferingshapes us positively?
Do you believe that we live ina broken world, but God is
sovereign?
Do you believe that this worldis not your home, that this is
as close to hell as a believerwill ever get?
(13:27):
Can you say?
I don't understand why twopeople with the same story can
ask the same God for the samething and get different things,
and I don't understand that.
But God is sovereign.
Can you find your way in thesemoments of suffering, in these
moments of pain, in thesemoments of suffering, in these
moments of pain, and to likeJacob, wrestled with the angel.
(13:47):
He spent time with God and saidI will not let go until you
bless me.
And Jacob walked away with alimp.
Jacob walked away with a holylimp.
Guys, I encourage you to get into the ring and wrestle with
your faith, because God canhandle it, as we saw with Jacob,
(14:10):
who said I will not let gountil you bless me.
It reminds me of a time whenI've shared so many times on
this podcast.
It is September of 2025.
And in September of 2008, Iattempted to take my life.
It is National SuicideAwareness Month.
I did not want to be here.
The pain had simply overtakenme.
I remember sliding down a wallin that dark apartment and just
(14:35):
wanting to end it all, wantingto be gone, but in that moment,
god came and he understood thatI just needed help in human form
, and people came along to helpme.
That was maybe the only time inmy life when I've ever
struggled with my faith and,instead of indicting a holy
(14:56):
loving God, in those moments, inthose darkest moments of my
life, I was able to see thesovereignty of God.
I was able to articulate Idon't understand what you're
doing, but I know that you willperfect all that concerns me.
That started me on a journey, avery, very long journey of
getting better and getting tothe place where I am today,
(15:17):
where, in September of 2025,instead of being in a hospital
for my own psychiatric breakdownfor lack of a better way to
explain that I'm helping peoplewho are not as far along on
their journey because he willperfect all that concerns me and
I want him to use the thingsthat have happened to further
(15:39):
the gospel, and I hope that thispodcast has done this today.
If you're under the sound of myvoice, I do not make light of
your pain, but I do tell you.
I hope that you can look at thepeople who have gone before you
and don't go to the dark places, because ultimately, where I
landed with all of my sufferingis that God is good.
Jesus loves me.
This I know, for the Bibletells me.
(16:02):
So I belong to him, you belongto him.
I was having this conversationwith some people at work the
other day.
A friend of mine who herhusband, asked her why does Amy
believe in God?
And my friend said to him she'shad a hard life, she can have
(16:23):
her God.
May it be so that one day, wheneverybody looks at all the
things that have happened in ourlives, may it be so that we
trusted God with that pain andwe allowed it to be used by him.
I don't say that to be triteand to try to make light of your
(16:43):
pain.
I only know that at the end ofthe day, when the wrestling
match happens with a holy God,that you will land at a place of
peace and understand that Goddid exactly what he told us it
was going to do Suffering wasgoing to be on this planet.
It is not an embarrassment toChristianity.
It is a defining moment that wewere, we could say we knew this
(17:04):
would happen.
Suffering is promised.
It is a defining moment wherewe could say we knew this would
happen.
Suffering is promised.
It is universal, it ispurposeful, it is temporary, it
links us to Jesus and it pointsus to hope.
And will you let it be themegaphone that God uses to rouse
a deaf world?
As CS Lewis once said, godwhispers in our pleasures, he
(17:25):
speaks in our conscience, but heshouts in our pain.
It is a megaphone to rouse adeaf world.
My friends, suffering may be atyour doorstep right now, it
might be in your home, butscripture tells us in that full
passage in 2 Corinthians 4,16-18,.
Therefore, therefore, do notlose heart, for our light and
(17:47):
momentary troubles are achievingfor us an eternal glory that
far outweighs them all.
So we fix our eyes on what isunseen and we trust in the Lord
with all of our hearts.
We lean not into our ownunderstanding.
(18:09):
In all of our ways weacknowledge him and, guys, then
then he will direct your path.
So, in this moment where yourflesh and your heart may fail
you, can you say, as thepsalmist says you, oh Lord, are
my strength and my portionforever.
I hope that you guys can findsome peace in your suffering,
(18:38):
knowing that it is purposeful,that it is promised and that you
are not alone.
Can you walk by faith, evenwhen you cannot see?
Guys, thank you so much forjoining me here today.
I am about one or two podcastcycles away from being done with
(19:02):
my doctorate degree.
We will rebrand at that pointand be back with brand new
episodes every two weeks.
Until then, we are in survivalmode, so I'm going to leave you
until I see you again here, andyou know what I'm going to say.
You are seen, you are known youare heard, you are loved and
you are so, so valued.
Y'all have a good one.
Speaker 1 (19:30):
I know your heart is heavy from those nights, but
just remember that you are afighter.
A fighter.
You never know just whattomorrow holds, and you're
(19:55):
stronger than you know.
Oh, you're stronger than youknow.
Hold on, don't let go.
Hold on and don't let go.
(20:17):
Just take one step closer, putone foot in front of the other.
You'll get through this.
Just follow the light One stepcloser, one foot in front of the
(20:44):
other.
You'll get through this.
Just follow the light in thedarkness.
You're gonna be okay.
You're gonna be okay.
(21:05):
You're gonna be okay.
When the night is closing in,don't give up and don't give in.
This won't last.
It's not the end.
It's not the end.
(21:26):
You're gonna be okay.
It's not the end.
You're gonna be okay.
When the night is closing in,don't give up and don't give in.
This won't last.
It's not the end.
It's not the end.
You're gonna be okay.
(21:51):
You're gonna be okay.
You're not alone, Never alone.
You're gonna be okay.
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