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November 24, 2025 11 mins

When you transform your relationship with food, you don't just change your behaviors - you change who you are.

This episode reveals the uncomfortable truth about identity grief: to become someone who naturally takes care of their body, you have to grieve the loss of being "someone who struggles with food."

This grief is real, necessary, and completely normal - but no one talks about it.

Important Points Covered

1. Identity Loss is Real Being "someone who struggles" has served you - it provided sympathy, understanding, community, and explanations for difficulties. Losing this identity, even though it was painful, involves genuine grief.

2. Why No One Talks About This The wellness industry focuses on behaviors, not psychology. Grief feels negative when transformation should feel positive. It's easier to sell the destination than prepare people for the complex psychological journey.

3. What the Grief Looks Like Missing the simplicity of diet rules, feeling disconnected from friends still in diet culture, losing the "someday" fantasy, and feeling scared about who you're becoming. All normal parts of deep transformation.

4. This is Actually Good News Identity grief means you're changing at the deepest level possible. Surface-level changes don't involve grief - only real transformation does. If you're feeling this, the work is working.

5. How to Navigate It Name the grief, be gentle with yourself, find support from people who understand identity change, and remember that grief and growth can coexist.

If you're experiencing this grief, you're not broken or failing - you're growing.

Real transformation involves letting go of who you used to be to become who you're meant to be. Join us Wednesday for the Q&A episode where we'll dive deeper into your questions about navigating identity grief.

Key Takeaway

Identity grief during transformation is a sign that deep change is happening. You can miss your old self while still growing into your new self - both feelings can coexist and are completely normal.

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