December 30, 2024 • 36 mins
Ever wondered how you can be a supportive ally to the LGBTQIA community?
Hear from Phillip Alexander Downie of MoCo Pride Center and Mia Gordon from Trans Maryland as they share their insights on available resources and how we can all make a difference!
Note: This podcast was recorded before the current president took office. As a result, some information may be inaccurate based on recent executive actions.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Good day and welcome to what's Happening, moco, an
authentic unscripted podcastfrom your Montgomery County
government.
Now here's your host.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Derek Kenney.
Good day and welcome to aspecial edition of the what's
Happening MoCo podcast.
In today's episode, we'retalking about MoCo pride and
learning about the LGBTQcommunity inside of the county,
and also resources available toindividuals and families.
To start us off today, join mein welcoming Philip Alexander
(00:34):
Downey.
He's the Chief ExecutiveOfficer of MoCo Pride Center.
Welcome, philip, how are youtoday?
Speaker 3 (00:40):
I'm doing well.
Thank you so much for having me.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Well, thank you for being here.
I think this is such awonderful thing to do.
We're such a diverse county inso many different ways cultures,
religions, races but the peopleof the county are so beautiful,
strong, intelligent and diversein many, many other different
ways as well, and today we'regoing to learn a bit more about
some of those ways.
Sounds okay?
Yeah, absolutely All right,that's fantastic.
(01:02):
So tell me, before we startabout you and your organization,
and when did you start gettinginvolved inside of Montgomery
County's LGBTQ?
Speaker 3 (01:14):
community, absolutely .
So my name again PhilipAlexander Downey.
My pronouns are he, him.
I started off in this roleworking for an organization now
founded and comprised within theMontgomery County Pride family.
So Live In your Truth, live Inyour Truth.
We're the main programming armfor Montgomery County Pride in
(01:37):
the Plaza, which is our largecountywide celebration of LGBTQI
, a love acceptance communityand our just fabulous selves,
and so, within that role, we doa lot of linkage to care and
wellness work, and so Livingyour Truth is an organization
that is all about connectingfolks with wellness resources,
(01:59):
while we provide atmospheres andoutlets for authenticity where
people we really.
Our message at the end of theday is always live in your truth
.
Of course, you absolutely belong, and you have not found all of
the people that are going tolove you yet, and that's so
important when we go through andwe provide this messaging but
(02:19):
not only messaging, butresources, and so live in your
truth is a great hub for findinglocal resources at our programs
, and we have worked andpartnered with the MoCo Pride
Center for a long time as theirprogramming arm, alongside their
longest standing program, whichis Montgomery County Pride Prom
or MoCo Pride Prom, and so thathas almost been in existence
(02:41):
for a decade.
So those were my beginningsworking with the organization in
2019, and then flash today,where I am the CEO of the Pride
Center, the inaugural, but alsothe culturally competent
community-based organizationsthat already do this amazing
(03:08):
work, like Trans Maryland.
So that's evolved into usbecoming the Montgomery County
Pride family under the MoCoPride Center Inc.
Umbrella.
So we're the consortium ofLGBTQIA plus service, advocacy,
arts and culture organizationsthat serve Montgomery County,
maryland and the region, andthat consists of Living your
Truth, trans Maryland,montgomery County Pride in the
(03:30):
Plaza, moco Pride Prom, theCoalition for Inclusive Schools
and Communities and Drag StoryHour.
Dc.
Maryland and Virginia alongsideMaryland Trans Unity.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
Oh that is a lot.
Yes, it is.
So let's insert applause herelater for all that good work.
Speaker 3 (03:47):
And then also so the people can keep track of all the
consortium, is there a websitethat people can go to just to
see all of the consortium andthen from there you can each of
the a lot of the consortiummembers have their own websites,
(04:08):
their own homes, their ownplaces that you can donate and
really support the communitiesand the individuals and the
initiatives that mean so much toyou or that personally hit home
All right fantastic.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
Now, one of the reasons I think you're so great
at your job is that you are notonly an ambassador, but not only
are you a catalyst of hope andof resources for people, but
you're also an educator.
You're helping to educate notthe people, necessarily, of the
community, but also the peoplethat love those people and the
people that are in the communitywith those people and all those
(04:41):
things.
So let's do a quick one on oneand you can help guide me
through this process, because Idon't know as much as I should
know and I think at the end ofthis episode I will know as much
as I should maybe know.
I hope, right, all right.
So let's start with LGBTQ.
We hear the acronym all thetime.
I think I butchered it severaltimes, trying to practice and
(05:02):
remember for this episode.
What does that acronym mean,and could you break down each
function or each asset of that?
Speaker 3 (05:14):
Yes, so the LGBTQIA plus community.
Lgbtq are acronyms that standfor the first letter of the
identity that some people youknow identify with in the
community.
So L, lesbian, g, gay, b,bisexual, LGBTQ, t, transgender
(05:35):
LGBTQ, q for queer orquestioning, I for intersex and
A for ally, and asexual andaromantic.
So ace folks is the A sometimes, but then there's also
2SLGBTQIA, which meanstwo-spirit.
(05:56):
So two-spirit is it istraditional to Native culture,
and there I'm first of all.
This is something that I shouldtell everyone.
No one knows everything.
So in communities are alwaysevolving, and so are folks, and
so is terminology.
But there is historicterminology and in terms of like
(06:18):
, two spirit, that is a termthat's existed within so many
communities for so long,especially in our indigenous
populations, and so it meansexactly what it's two spirit,
meaning that you have both thefeminine the masculine inside of
you, and so that's for some.
For some people, they considertwo spirit as a part of the
(06:38):
gender expansive community, andsome people view like or or a
part of the gender binary andsome people view it outside of.
So it really, when you'retalking to every individual,
what's good for one individualis not always good for everyone
else, and something that peopleare allowed to make mistakes.
(07:00):
It's really about theintentionality and how we talk
to people and respect them.
So if I didn't know your nameor your gender, I would call you
, but if I would call you,perhaps they or use or use
genderless pronouns when I'mspeaking about you, and so we're
just asking that, wheneversomeone is approaching someone
(07:23):
new, that you do the exact samething.
You know, there's so manyunique names that are cultural
and sometimes you may not beable to read it, or even names
that in the United States thatare genderless, like Leslie, and
so you speak to someone andyou're like oh, I'm so sorry,
leslie, when I was reading youremail, I thought you were a
woman, it's like.
But you know we're just tryingto teach people not to make
(07:45):
those assumptions and that thenwe can just simply ask like hey,
what are your pronouns, right?
Speaker 2 (07:51):
And and no, that was the question.
What are your pronouns?
My pronouns he him.
And is there another one of his?
No, he, him, his, but he's, he'sperfectly fine and and that's
and I think that's a goodconversation to have, and for
some of us that are older andI'll say I'm one of those people
because I'm now 50 plus, soit's now, I think, a better
(08:12):
environment, an environmentwhere I think everyone in the
community is embracing all of usand we want to learn more.
But it's kind of awkward tohave the conversation.
But what you're saying is it'sokay to ask, right, and it's
okay to share your pronouns orto get one wrong and be
(08:32):
corrected.
Now, what do you see or whatwould you desire from a person
that you first meet, that we'remeeting?
I think you've shared thisalready.
What would you want from them?
Anyone you're talking to, ifyou're saying you meet for the
first time and they want to knowmore about you?
Speaker 3 (08:53):
Yeah, treat me or anyone you meet just with
kindness and respect and don'tgo into any conversation with
assumptions about who somebodymay be.
So I like to give this example,especially when I'm talking
with black folks in.
I'm in communities and inspaces.
Think about when you were goingto a cookout at a family that
(09:15):
you are not familiar with at all.
Right, how are you going toapproach the individuals that
you go into, how are you goingto approach the space?
How are you even going toapproach the food?
And so you know, when you walkin, you use greet people and you
introduce yourself, and thenexactly that's all we're asking
for Just be regular.
Exactly Be a regular kind,genuine person.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
Now I think it's wonderful that you broke the ice
for us.
I mean, a lot of times we mayput too much weight on ourselves
because we want to be apositive part of the community
and the community is so diverseand wonderful um and and when
parts of our communities havechallenges, we want to be there
as well.
What are some of the challengesthat um people from the lgbtq
(10:00):
and etc.
Um community?
Because you've enlightened mewith the ia and the 2s um, what
are some of the challenges thatum part of the community faces
and how can we help them or howare they being helped?
Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
So queer people, lgbtqia plus people, two-spirit
folks we exist in every facet ofsociety, in every single
religion, in every place sincehumanity's beginnings.
Okay and so like.
When you talk about problemsspecific to, to LGBTQ plus
populations, they are compiledby the intersectionality of the,
(10:43):
or intersections of, thecommunities that you already
exist in.
Okay and so when you're talkingabout measurable outcomes for
for queer, transgender,expansive folks, uh, for for all
of my LGBTQ plus siblings, um,unfortunately, they are almost
going to be worse in everysingle measurable category of
wellness, specifically becauseif you think about the people
(11:07):
who have it worse off than add alike being gender, expansive or
a or sexuality difference ontothere, and then there the
oppression is compiled and theincreasing the statistics and
(11:31):
the disparity rates and how weare treated in healthcare
systems and spaces like that,then we are.
Now, if you compile being queeror trans on top of those
identities, you're still facingall of the discrimination of
being black or being a woman,but then you're adding the other
barriers and the otherintersections on top.
(11:52):
If you talk about a religiousminority, so like, imagine being
a trans woman who is in apredominantly white English
speaking space, who speaks Farsiand who also wears a hijab.
You know what I mean.
So you're talking aboutdiscriminating against them.
And then who also is visiblybrown or black?
And you're being discriminatedagainst not only because of your
(12:15):
head covering, not only becauseyou might appear to be visibly
trans, not only because youmight appear to be a woman or
someone who looks, but wearing ahijab and because you're a
religious minority, and then youhave an accent on top of it.
So all of those places we'resaying that, like you know what,
everyone is just human and theway that we would approach, like
(12:35):
having a conversation with anyindividual, is the way that we
should approach how we talk toqueer, trans, gender expansive
folks, our entire LGBTQIA pluscommunity, because the same
exact compassion is needed whenyou are speaking to any
individual or any person.
(12:55):
And you know, with our agingcommunities, like, think about
being older on top and not andfeeling more invisible.
Speaker 4 (13:03):
And.
Speaker 3 (13:03):
I and I get stories from from queer as from,
especially from older transfolks who might have to go into
a conservative assisted livingfacility and then they have to
go back in the closet becausethey don't have support.
So imagine living your life for, like you know, you're like, oh
, I'm finally able to retire,and then you can't even be who
you want to be or love who youwant to love at the part of your
(13:25):
life that's supposed to reallybelong to you really belong to
you.
Speaker 2 (13:32):
What type of resources are available for
people in that type of situationand for families that are
embracing someone that haseither come out or needs to come
out or whatever?
What type of resources orcounseling or guidelines or
whatever are out there forpeople not only that are LGBTQ,
but the people that love them aswell, to help them through
(13:55):
transitional stages from notnecessarily being aware, but
being aware and supportive?
Speaker 3 (14:03):
So, of course, talking to your family member
and providing space for them,you were the first resource.
Like you're the first line ofdefense against the outside
world and just making sure thatyour family members, your loved
one, your community members, hasa safe space and a home with
you, that you're an ally, and Ioften tell people that being an
(14:24):
ally is unlearning so much morethan you are learning because
it's like we have to break downwhat we thought we knew and go
into it with like, hey, I wantto uplift your voice and really
hear what you have to say.
Um, and then from there, um, ofcourse, local community
resources like the MontgomeryCounty pride family and MoCo
pride center are alwaysavailable.
(14:44):
Um, local health departments,if you have a friendly
government.
Um, protections in MontgomeryCounty are strong for LGBTQIA
plus folks, but unfortunately,we live in a changing landscape
and that isn't the case foreveryone around the United
States and it certainly isn'tthe case for everyone even in
(15:05):
Maryland.
And so, when we want to talkabout resources, of course,
mental health services supportlike HHS is amazing Behavioral
health and crisis managementsupport.
And then, of course, ensuringthat those hey ask for
(15:30):
culturally, ask for culturalcompetency training from your
employer or from your supervisorto ensure that you're able to
provide the necessary tools andresources and so that, like you
know, people who look differentfrom you or who seem different
from you don't have to gothrough a minefield in order to
(15:51):
access services that should beavailable to everyone.
Wow, that's fantastic.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
There's a lot to think about.
It's not as simple as one thing, even in the acronym that we
discussed, and it is broad.
There's individual needs andeach of those individuals that
are described in one of thoseletters, right, yes, how did you
bring because this is, I'mthinking about, the diversity
part of it how do you bring allof these people together under
(16:20):
one coalition, through the MoCoPride Center and provide
services and information?
Speaker 3 (16:28):
Well, so we work together in a few different ways
.
I mean, I took that living yourtruth model where we wanted to
connect as many folks aspossible to wellness services
that were absolutely accessible.
So from like onsite testing,opioid overdose prevention
resources, food insecurityresources, housing insecurity
resources, substance usedisorder resources, like just
(16:50):
literally everything that youcould possibly provide or do
we're like, if we you know,mental health resources as well.
And so when we brought togetherthe Pride family, we knew that
there was a need.
We kind of already workedtogether, of course, one year at
every once.
Every year we're all togetherat Pride trying to provide all
(17:10):
of these resources and saying,hey, we're all together at pride
trying to provide all of theseresources and saying, hey, we're
all here.
But then we took that model andwe turned it into monthly and
monthly program series, weeklysupport groups and things like
that that were already happeningwithin the organizations, but
then we could link people withmore resources because we were
all working together.
And so it's like having TransMaryland as a partner, like they
(17:32):
are the largest gender markerand name change program in the
state, and so it is so like Iknow the professionals to send
folks to if you are havingcertain issues, Our amazing
LGBTQ plus county liaison, drAmina Johnson, if you are, if we
will put together like we willfix that puzzle and make the
pieces fit, even if we'remissing a couple of them.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
There you are, and I'm definitely a jigsaw person
too, so I understand when youhave that piece missing or that
one piece.
It's going to work.
It's going to work Because,ultimately, what we're going to
look at is a beautiful pictureand that's what we want to
strive for Now, and thank youfor your organization and all
they do so far.
Gosh, let's talk about some ofthe events you talked about.
There's events happening everymonth and, of course, there's
(18:16):
MoCo Pride, the celebration, Ithink, in June.
Let's talk about thatcelebration and what it entails,
and then some of the otheropportunities to come out and
fellowship or to learn, I guessin person or virtually, for
people, either directly orindirectly, or family or friends
or allies, to come together andbe part of the community.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
Absolutely so with our.
So there are, there's a fewdifferent spaces.
I was like, where do we go withthis?
So our Live In your Truth Night, which is a great program that
happens in downtown SilverSpring.
We always try and make ourin-person programs accessible on
the Metro, all of that goodstuff.
So people can, you know, cantravel there and get there very
(19:03):
easily.
Those happen April through June.
You can visitliveinyourtruthorg forward slash
events for our programs, alongwith mocopridecenterorg forward
slash events.
And then we're also building.
We're working on opening twopride resource centers that will
house our organizations formore consistent services as well
(19:26):
.
And so we are working right nowwith the county government.
I don't know how much I can sayabout the space that we have
chosen, but we're working withgeneral services and folks.
Make sure you share the goodnews.
Speaker 2 (19:38):
Oh, we definitely will.
Fantastic.
Well, I'm excited because ofthe resources available.
Residents have access to a warmenvironment and a community of
people to embrace them and helpto uplift us all with all the
diversity and the latestdiversity that I didn't consider
(19:59):
, because you're not onlytalking about being
African-American or being animmigrant or having different
religious beliefs or all thosethings.
Complexity is there and you'readdressing all those things as
well, but when it comes to beinggood allies and being partners
and being a community, it allstarts with a conversation.
(20:21):
Yes, hey, how are you today?
I'm Derek and you'll say I'mPhillip.
And then at what point do Ineed to share?
Or is it appropriate to sharemy pronouns if ever, or just
with my emails?
Or is that showing that I'm anally, if I do have those
pronouns, or just makes iteasier for other people to
(20:43):
communicate with me?
Speaker 3 (20:45):
It is an easy first step.
I encourage you to share yourpronouns all the time because
you know, even if someone asksyou like, hey, why are you
sharing your pronouns, we knowyou're a man, does not matter
Like you're like.
First of all, no, everyone doesnot like someone may see you,
may not see you, who has avision impairment, and the only
time that they speak with you isthrough a computer and they
(21:08):
they're like oh you know, derek,who knows Somebody?
Speaker 2 (21:11):
could have been like I want to be Derek with a woman.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
You know, it's just it's just making sure that
people you can also provide thatatmosphere where it's like you
sometimes queer people don'tfeel comfortable correcting
folks, but like it's our job inspaces to show up for people.
You know, if you ever seesomething that's happening wrong
, you're not going to be, you'renot going to just stand by and
(21:37):
let it happen.
You know what I mean, and thatgoes in our social spaces as
well.
If somebody is being attacked,harassed, misgendered, anything
like that and it's malicious andintentful.
You know, even when I'm with myqueer siblings and community
members in spaces, sometimespeople's pronouns and things
they evolve and so like, andsometimes I forget and I don't
(22:01):
know all of the information andI get corrected and it's like
thank you.
Or sometimes I'll correct folkswhen I'm having a conversation
because no one knows everything.
And even if you do, it's alwaysgood to just not assume and
then to go in with likesometimes we do a check-in, like
one of my team members theother day we were talking I said
let me just check in on yourpronouns and then we checked in
on them and you know I have themwritten down like and they're
(22:23):
already in their signature andeverything.
So introducing your pronouns onin your profile wearing pronoun
pins like that is just a veryeasy and simple way to show that
you are an ally and that you'rea safe space for transgender,
expansive and queer folks.
Fantastic.
Speaker 2 (22:40):
And speaking of transgender, we're going to talk
about that in a little bit.
We have the wonderful Mia hereand we'll talk with her in just
a moment, but before we go,you've shared a lot of great
information, so let's share thewebsite again in different ways
that people can connect with youand your organization, as well
as other organizations that makesense.
Um, and then, uh, maybe shareone last word of wisdom, um,
(23:01):
that you would share with the?
Um Montgomery County at large.
Um, whatever you want to share.
Speaker 3 (23:08):
Okay, absolutely so.
Uh, please visit ummocopridecenterorg.
Forward slash, donate.
Donating dollars is a great wayto contribute.
Visit our website,mocopridecenterorg.
Of course, to get involved, tovolunteer, and volunteering your
time is another way tocontribute and, of course, being
an ally in a safe space,wherever you are, is the best
(23:29):
way to contribute to communityefforts.
And then, what was the lastthing I was supposed to?
Oh, a little tidbit of wisdom.
You know, I said at thebeginning, but I'll say it again
, that you belong, youabsolutely belong, to always,
always, living your truth, andyou have not met all of the
(23:50):
people who are going to love youyet.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
All right, wonderful.
You haven't met all the peoplewho are going to love you yet.
That's what's happening, moco.
Up next we'll be talking to Miawith Trans Maryland.
Thank you so much, derek.
Thank you and welcome back.
We are here with thefantabulous Mia Gordon.
She's a volunteer with TransMaryland.
Welcome, mia, how are you today?
Speaker 4 (24:10):
I'm good.
How are you?
Speaker 2 (24:11):
I'm pretty good.
I'm pretty good, I'm feelingempowered for the conversation
with Phillip and I want tointroduce myself to you.
I'm Derek he him is.
It's a pleasure meeting you,mia.
Speaker 4 (24:22):
Awesome, nice to meet you.
I'm Mia Gordon.
She or they, either one doesn'tmatter.
Speaker 2 (24:27):
All right, well, pleasure meeting you.
And you're with Trans Marylandand for those that aren't
familiar, I think we talkedabout it a little bit in the
last segment.
What does trans reference?
What does the reference mean,trans?
Speaker 4 (24:41):
Trans, as in transgender.
It's an abbreviation.
It means you have changedsomething about your gender.
Either you don't presentexactly as other people would
associate with your gender.
You can identify as non-binary.
You can identify as a differentgender than what you were born
as.
You can just say I don't have agender, I don't, that's not me.
(25:04):
You can say that your genderchanges.
You know based on the day.
You know all sorts of othervariations within gender.
Speaker 2 (25:14):
Wow, that's powerful.
That's very an empoweringstatement that you, you are free
and I think we all are freewithin our community and
collective community inMontgomery County, where we're
so diverse and a lot of us arenow free to express our truths,
and I think what we just learnedjust recently from Phillip is
that it's important that we allare in a safe place to express
(25:35):
our truths.
What does Trans Maryland do forindividuals of the trans nature
?
Speaker 4 (25:42):
Well, so we have several resources.
We do a name and gender changeprogram.
This helps people update theirIDs at the Maryland Motor
Vehicle Administration.
What else Legal paperworkpassports, birth certificates
Trans Maryland also does avirtual support group, t4t
(26:05):
transgender people, for othertransgender people.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
Let's stop right there, though, because I don't
think.
I think that's great, that'sawesome.
Number one I think there's asignificant part in someone's
life where they're they'reshaping their identity to be
more accurate, and you'rehelping them when you say change
their names.
What does that mean for aperson that may not get it that
they're changing their name fromtheir birth name to something
(26:32):
more appropriate to who they are?
Speaker 4 (26:34):
Right.
Some people's names areassociated with genders and you
may associate a given name witha given gender and sometimes you
get it right.
Sometimes you get it wrong,because sometimes there's not
exactly a rhyme or a reason toit.
When someone else names you,when you name yourself, you can
shape it a little more if that'sappropriate or if you've never.
Speaker 2 (26:56):
There are a lot of people who don't really go by
their birth names, but you'reactually helping go through the
process to legally change thename so that, in the eyes of the
eyes of the government, in theeyes of anyone, um, and legally
you sign your checks, um, yousign your name, you, um,
whatever based off of this new,and you guys help with that
process, which can be achallenging process, because if
(27:19):
you didn't know, I don't know, Ididn't know you can, you can do
that easily, and then it maynot be an easy process.
So what?
What are some of the otherthings that your organization
provides?
Speaker 4 (27:29):
Well, the T4T weekly virtual support group is to help
trans people share tips andadvice and vent and support with
each other.
That's a virtual group everyWednesday and weekly.
We also on our website,transmarylandorg.
We offer info on localresources for gender affirming
(27:53):
care and Trans Maryland alsotries to go to a lot of events.
Speaker 2 (27:57):
Oh, wow, okay.
Speaker 4 (27:59):
And when we're there, we try and provide information,
answer people's questions thatthey may have about what trans
maryland, what do we have, youknow?
What do they know aboutmontgomery county resources?
It's.
It's really useful when we meetpeople, and I've met people who
have come up and been like, ohyeah, you guys helped me change
my name, and that's, it's socool I can imagine that being a
(28:24):
significant moment in someone'slife, like a like, a like.
Speaker 2 (28:28):
If you're reading a book.
There's like a, a moment in thebook where, like, something
significant happens andnothing's ever the same again.
It's like the sun is shining.
You know, there's a cloudseparate.
The sun is shining.
Is that one of those moments?
Are there other moments likethat for um, someone in their um
, last part of their, theirlives, being a trans person?
Speaker 4 (28:48):
I think some people have this sort of light bulb
moment where it's sort of likeoh, all these things you know
added up to oh, I guess I amtransgender, I think for other
people it's just sort of aprogressive, you know, like it's
just built up and it's kind ofuneventful.
But I think, sorry, like it'sjust built up and it's kind of
uneventful, but I think sorry,I'm forgetting the question.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
I think I think you answered it very well.
I think you answered it verywell.
It was just that breakthroughmoment I don't think I want to
call it the tipping point whereeverything just floods in and
you become who you are, like aflower having this, petals
evolve, things of that nature.
So, um, what, what do you?
Uh, what, what, what do you, asa volunteer, do with trans
maryland?
(29:32):
Do you work?
Um, how do you work, withindividuals and families?
Speaker 4 (29:37):
so I I was actually at philip's event the pride in
the plaza in june of this yearwhere I tabled it.
I had a great time time I'vetabled at other events where
it's you know, people come upand ask sort of hey, what's your
group, what do you offer?
I've, and you get to go aroundtoo and meet other groups and
(29:58):
learn about their resources andit.
It just builds a bunch ofcamaraderie within the community
.
I've met people and, yeah, I'vemade some good friends along
the way too.
It's it's really nice meetingall these like-minded people who
are really supportive, becausewe're all different but we all
live here and it's all ourcommunity.
Speaker 2 (30:16):
Yeah, yeah, it is.
What are some of the thingsthat you have advice for the
person that is maybe evolving tounderstanding who they are as a
trans person or potentiallytrans person?
What advice do you have for ayoung person or older person and
what are the next steps throughTrans Maryland?
How can you guys help thatperson?
Speaker 4 (30:39):
Right.
I think 2024 is a great time tobe trans.
I realize we have the electionand there's some pessimism, but
I think the communities evolvedso much over even a decade where
it seems much more safer safernot totally safe, but safer to
explore your own gender, and Ithink there were people who put
(31:02):
it off, and there are people whoare never quite figured it out
and or are young and they're ata point where they're allowed or
they feel more capable andempowered in order to explore
their own gender.
I think it's awesome that welive in a time where people can
explore their gender and sort offind out where they want to fit
in within the gender spectrum,how they'd like to label
(31:25):
themselves and just how they'dlike to be seen by others and
communicate that outwards.
I think once you apply a labelto yourself and other people are
familiar with your label, theycan help see literally see you
Right.
Speaker 2 (31:41):
So what advice do you have for families of a trans
person that has now embraced whothey are, they have their new
name and they introducethemselves to the family.
Or maybe a younger person who'snot fully able to totally
transition with the name etc.
But they've identified thatthey themselves as now being
(32:02):
trans.
How should families react andwhat are some of the best
practices for families to showsupport for that person at that
time?
Speaker 4 (32:12):
I would say be supportive.
I mean, if these are yourfamily members, if you loved
them before, I would hope youwould still love them after.
You're better.
Okay, there you go, Right right, and if you had issues before,
I don't think this will solveyour issues, but I hope it
doesn't exacerbate them either.
Families are complex.
(32:34):
Yes, they are.
But I would say be supportive,Ask people what they need.
I think sometimes trans needsaren't always as obvious as
other people's needs is asobvious as other people's needs.
Yes, some people are very much.
I'm trans, but I want to live avery you know, picket, fence,
chicken in every pot, TV inevery room lifestyle kids you
(32:57):
know, and others are just likeno, I'm abandoning all of that.
This is what I want to do.
I'm not going to have kids.
Maybe I'll settle down when I'm40 or 50 or never, and you just
kind of have to supporteveryone what they want to do.
I think it's not that muchdifferent than just having a kid
(33:18):
who's different from you, orhaving a parent who you don't
quite relate to, or a siblingthat you're not very close to.
Speaker 2 (33:24):
How about that yeah?
Speaker 4 (33:26):
But you support them.
You say, hey, you found thatthing that you like Good for you
.
You're doing this, that'sawesome.
I support you.
Speaker 2 (33:34):
Well, Mia, good for you and good for Trans Maryland
for all that you're doing forfamilies and individuals in
Montgomery County, but also inthe greater state of Maryland,
and I'm sure that you guys arehelping to influence things
nationwide as well.
What are the contactinformation or how do you want
people to reach out to TransMaryland If they have questions,
(33:55):
if they need resources?
What's the best first step?
Speaker 4 (33:59):
Transmarylandorg is our website.
If you want, you can go.
There's a mailing list optionon there.
There's also a fundraisingoption.
Speaker 2 (34:08):
Oh, okay, you can't do anything without money, right
?
Speaker 4 (34:13):
Someone has to provide the money.
And if you have money, we wouldlike it.
If you're interested in ourresources, the website has them.
We have some upcoming name andgender marker change clinics, so
if you need to update one ofthose, we also do that virtually
because I know I know we havesome upcoming events in
Baltimore but you may not haveaccess to get to Baltimore and
(34:38):
we're currently in MontgomeryCounty.
The virtual stuff definitelycovers Montgomery County and,
yeah, I think just trying tobring people together and really
support the trans community, Ithink that's what Trans Maryland
does really well.
Speaker 2 (34:54):
Fantastic and thank you so much for volunteering.
Thank you, it's one thing toserve because that's your
calling, and then that's kind ofyour role.
It becomes your occupation.
But when you're serving out oflove and out of compassion and
help and hope for your fellowperson, that means quite a lot.
Well, thank you so much, mia,she.
(35:15):
They All right.
I got that right Perfect.
And that's what's happening inMoCo.
We're striving to be a better,more understanding, a more
loving county, and that's what'shappening.
Thank you so much me for beinghere.
Do you have anything else youwant to add before we go?
Speaker 4 (35:30):
Be kind to each other .
Speaker 2 (35:32):
Of course, be kind to one another, and that's a good
way to close out this year.
Be kind to one another, eachother.
Be kind to yourselves.
Enjoy yourselves at the closeof this year, because this is
going to come out in lateDecember.
I this year, because this isgoing to come out in late
December.
I'm wishing all of you a happyhappy new year full of love,
understanding and peace, thankyou, thank you.
Speaker 1 (35:52):
Thanks for listening to what's Happening MoCo.
Please subscribe via yourfavorite podcasting platform and
follow us on Facebook.
This podcast is brought to youby County Cable Montgomery, your
source for news and informationfrom the Montgomery County
Government.
Connect with us via cable,Facebook, Instagram or YouTube
(36:14):
by searching for County CableMoCo.
Good day and welcome to what's Happening, moco, an
authentic unscripted podcastfrom your Montgomery County
government.
Now here's your host.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Derek Kenney.
Good day and welcome to aspecial edition of the what's
Happening MoCo podcast.
In today's episode, we'retalking about MoCo pride and
learning about the LGBTQcommunity inside of the county,
and also resources available toindividuals and families.
To start us off today, join mein welcoming Philip Alexander
(00:34):
Downey.
He's the Chief ExecutiveOfficer of MoCo Pride Center.
Welcome, philip, how are youtoday?
Speaker 3 (00:40):
I'm doing well.
Thank you so much for having me.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Well, thank you for being here.
I think this is such awonderful thing to do.
We're such a diverse county inso many different ways cultures,
religions, races but the peopleof the county are so beautiful,
strong, intelligent and diversein many, many other different
ways as well, and today we'regoing to learn a bit more about
some of those ways.
Sounds okay?
Yeah, absolutely All right,that's fantastic.
(01:02):
So tell me, before we startabout you and your organization,
and when did you start gettinginvolved inside of Montgomery
County's LGBTQ?
Speaker 3 (01:14):
community, absolutely .
So my name again PhilipAlexander Downey.
My pronouns are he, him.
I started off in this roleworking for an organization now
founded and comprised within theMontgomery County Pride family.
So Live In your Truth, live Inyour Truth.
We're the main programming armfor Montgomery County Pride in
(01:37):
the Plaza, which is our largecountywide celebration of LGBTQI
, a love acceptance communityand our just fabulous selves,
and so, within that role, we doa lot of linkage to care and
wellness work, and so Livingyour Truth is an organization
that is all about connectingfolks with wellness resources,
(01:59):
while we provide atmospheres andoutlets for authenticity where
people we really.
Our message at the end of theday is always live in your truth
.
Of course, you absolutely belong, and you have not found all of
the people that are going tolove you yet, and that's so
important when we go through andwe provide this messaging but
(02:19):
not only messaging, butresources, and so live in your
truth is a great hub for findinglocal resources at our programs
, and we have worked andpartnered with the MoCo Pride
Center for a long time as theirprogramming arm, alongside their
longest standing program, whichis Montgomery County Pride Prom
or MoCo Pride Prom, and so thathas almost been in existence
(02:41):
for a decade.
So those were my beginningsworking with the organization in
2019, and then flash today,where I am the CEO of the Pride
Center, the inaugural, but alsothe culturally competent
community-based organizationsthat already do this amazing
(03:08):
work, like Trans Maryland.
So that's evolved into usbecoming the Montgomery County
Pride family under the MoCoPride Center Inc.
Umbrella.
So we're the consortium ofLGBTQIA plus service, advocacy,
arts and culture organizationsthat serve Montgomery County,
maryland and the region, andthat consists of Living your
Truth, trans Maryland,montgomery County Pride in the
(03:30):
Plaza, moco Pride Prom, theCoalition for Inclusive Schools
and Communities and Drag StoryHour.
Dc.
Maryland and Virginia alongsideMaryland Trans Unity.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
Oh that is a lot.
Yes, it is.
So let's insert applause herelater for all that good work.
Speaker 3 (03:47):
And then also so the people can keep track of all the
consortium, is there a websitethat people can go to just to
see all of the consortium andthen from there you can each of
the a lot of the consortiummembers have their own websites,
(04:08):
their own homes, their ownplaces that you can donate and
really support the communitiesand the individuals and the
initiatives that mean so much toyou or that personally hit home
All right fantastic.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
Now, one of the reasons I think you're so great
at your job is that you are notonly an ambassador, but not only
are you a catalyst of hope andof resources for people, but
you're also an educator.
You're helping to educate notthe people, necessarily, of the
community, but also the peoplethat love those people and the
people that are in the communitywith those people and all those
(04:41):
things.
So let's do a quick one on oneand you can help guide me
through this process, because Idon't know as much as I should
know and I think at the end ofthis episode I will know as much
as I should maybe know.
I hope, right, all right.
So let's start with LGBTQ.
We hear the acronym all thetime.
I think I butchered it severaltimes, trying to practice and
(05:02):
remember for this episode.
What does that acronym mean,and could you break down each
function or each asset of that?
Speaker 3 (05:14):
Yes, so the LGBTQIA plus community.
Lgbtq are acronyms that standfor the first letter of the
identity that some people youknow identify with in the
community.
So L, lesbian, g, gay, b,bisexual, LGBTQ, t, transgender
(05:35):
LGBTQ, q for queer orquestioning, I for intersex and
A for ally, and asexual andaromantic.
So ace folks is the A sometimes, but then there's also
2SLGBTQIA, which meanstwo-spirit.
(05:56):
So two-spirit is it istraditional to Native culture,
and there I'm first of all.
This is something that I shouldtell everyone.
No one knows everything.
So in communities are alwaysevolving, and so are folks, and
so is terminology.
But there is historicterminology and in terms of like
(06:18):
, two spirit, that is a termthat's existed within so many
communities for so long,especially in our indigenous
populations, and so it meansexactly what it's two spirit,
meaning that you have both thefeminine the masculine inside of
you, and so that's for some.
For some people, they considertwo spirit as a part of the
(06:38):
gender expansive community, andsome people view like or or a
part of the gender binary andsome people view it outside of.
So it really, when you'retalking to every individual,
what's good for one individualis not always good for everyone
else, and something that peopleare allowed to make mistakes.
(07:00):
It's really about theintentionality and how we talk
to people and respect them.
So if I didn't know your nameor your gender, I would call you
, but if I would call you,perhaps they or use or use
genderless pronouns when I'mspeaking about you, and so we're
just asking that, wheneversomeone is approaching someone
(07:23):
new, that you do the exact samething.
You know, there's so manyunique names that are cultural
and sometimes you may not beable to read it, or even names
that in the United States thatare genderless, like Leslie, and
so you speak to someone andyou're like oh, I'm so sorry,
leslie, when I was reading youremail, I thought you were a
woman, it's like.
But you know we're just tryingto teach people not to make
(07:45):
those assumptions and that thenwe can just simply ask like hey,
what are your pronouns, right?
Speaker 2 (07:51):
And and no, that was the question.
What are your pronouns?
My pronouns he him.
And is there another one of his?
No, he, him, his, but he's, he'sperfectly fine and and that's
and I think that's a goodconversation to have, and for
some of us that are older andI'll say I'm one of those people
because I'm now 50 plus, soit's now, I think, a better
(08:12):
environment, an environmentwhere I think everyone in the
community is embracing all of usand we want to learn more.
But it's kind of awkward tohave the conversation.
But what you're saying is it'sokay to ask, right, and it's
okay to share your pronouns orto get one wrong and be
(08:32):
corrected.
Now, what do you see or whatwould you desire from a person
that you first meet, that we'remeeting?
I think you've shared thisalready.
What would you want from them?
Anyone you're talking to, ifyou're saying you meet for the
first time and they want to knowmore about you?
Speaker 3 (08:53):
Yeah, treat me or anyone you meet just with
kindness and respect and don'tgo into any conversation with
assumptions about who somebodymay be.
So I like to give this example,especially when I'm talking
with black folks in.
I'm in communities and inspaces.
Think about when you were goingto a cookout at a family that
(09:15):
you are not familiar with at all.
Right, how are you going toapproach the individuals that
you go into, how are you goingto approach the space?
How are you even going toapproach the food?
And so you know, when you walkin, you use greet people and you
introduce yourself, and thenexactly that's all we're asking
for Just be regular.
Exactly Be a regular kind,genuine person.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
Now I think it's wonderful that you broke the ice
for us.
I mean, a lot of times we mayput too much weight on ourselves
because we want to be apositive part of the community
and the community is so diverseand wonderful um and and when
parts of our communities havechallenges, we want to be there
as well.
What are some of the challengesthat um people from the lgbtq
(10:00):
and etc.
Um community?
Because you've enlightened mewith the ia and the 2s um, what
are some of the challenges thatum part of the community faces
and how can we help them or howare they being helped?
Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
So queer people, lgbtqia plus people, two-spirit
folks we exist in every facet ofsociety, in every single
religion, in every place sincehumanity's beginnings.
Okay and so like.
When you talk about problemsspecific to, to LGBTQ plus
populations, they are compiledby the intersectionality of the,
(10:43):
or intersections of, thecommunities that you already
exist in.
Okay and so when you're talkingabout measurable outcomes for
for queer, transgender,expansive folks, uh, for for all
of my LGBTQ plus siblings, um,unfortunately, they are almost
going to be worse in everysingle measurable category of
wellness, specifically becauseif you think about the people
(11:07):
who have it worse off than add alike being gender, expansive or
a or sexuality difference ontothere, and then there the
oppression is compiled and theincreasing the statistics and
(11:31):
the disparity rates and how weare treated in healthcare
systems and spaces like that,then we are.
Now, if you compile being queeror trans on top of those
identities, you're still facingall of the discrimination of
being black or being a woman,but then you're adding the other
barriers and the otherintersections on top.
(11:52):
If you talk about a religiousminority, so like, imagine being
a trans woman who is in apredominantly white English
speaking space, who speaks Farsiand who also wears a hijab.
You know what I mean.
So you're talking aboutdiscriminating against them.
And then who also is visiblybrown or black?
And you're being discriminatedagainst not only because of your
(12:15):
head covering, not only becauseyou might appear to be visibly
trans, not only because youmight appear to be a woman or
someone who looks, but wearing ahijab and because you're a
religious minority, and then youhave an accent on top of it.
So all of those places we'resaying that, like you know what,
everyone is just human and theway that we would approach, like
(12:35):
having a conversation with anyindividual, is the way that we
should approach how we talk toqueer, trans, gender expansive
folks, our entire LGBTQIA pluscommunity, because the same
exact compassion is needed whenyou are speaking to any
individual or any person.
(12:55):
And you know, with our agingcommunities, like, think about
being older on top and not andfeeling more invisible.
Speaker 4 (13:03):
And.
Speaker 3 (13:03):
I and I get stories from from queer as from,
especially from older transfolks who might have to go into
a conservative assisted livingfacility and then they have to
go back in the closet becausethey don't have support.
So imagine living your life for, like you know, you're like, oh
, I'm finally able to retire,and then you can't even be who
you want to be or love who youwant to love at the part of your
(13:25):
life that's supposed to reallybelong to you really belong to
you.
Speaker 2 (13:32):
What type of resources are available for
people in that type of situationand for families that are
embracing someone that haseither come out or needs to come
out or whatever?
What type of resources orcounseling or guidelines or
whatever are out there forpeople not only that are LGBTQ,
but the people that love them aswell, to help them through
(13:55):
transitional stages from notnecessarily being aware, but
being aware and supportive?
Speaker 3 (14:03):
So, of course, talking to your family member
and providing space for them,you were the first resource.
Like you're the first line ofdefense against the outside
world and just making sure thatyour family members, your loved
one, your community members, hasa safe space and a home with
you, that you're an ally, and Ioften tell people that being an
(14:24):
ally is unlearning so much morethan you are learning because
it's like we have to break downwhat we thought we knew and go
into it with like, hey, I wantto uplift your voice and really
hear what you have to say.
Um, and then from there, um, ofcourse, local community
resources like the MontgomeryCounty pride family and MoCo
pride center are alwaysavailable.
(14:44):
Um, local health departments,if you have a friendly
government.
Um, protections in MontgomeryCounty are strong for LGBTQIA
plus folks, but unfortunately,we live in a changing landscape
and that isn't the case foreveryone around the United
States and it certainly isn'tthe case for everyone even in
(15:05):
Maryland.
And so, when we want to talkabout resources, of course,
mental health services supportlike HHS is amazing Behavioral
health and crisis managementsupport.
And then, of course, ensuringthat those hey ask for
(15:30):
culturally, ask for culturalcompetency training from your
employer or from your supervisorto ensure that you're able to
provide the necessary tools andresources and so that, like you
know, people who look differentfrom you or who seem different
from you don't have to gothrough a minefield in order to
(15:51):
access services that should beavailable to everyone.
Wow, that's fantastic.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
There's a lot to think about.
It's not as simple as one thing, even in the acronym that we
discussed, and it is broad.
There's individual needs andeach of those individuals that
are described in one of thoseletters, right, yes, how did you
bring because this is, I'mthinking about, the diversity
part of it how do you bring allof these people together under
(16:20):
one coalition, through the MoCoPride Center and provide
services and information?
Speaker 3 (16:28):
Well, so we work together in a few different ways
.
I mean, I took that living yourtruth model where we wanted to
connect as many folks aspossible to wellness services
that were absolutely accessible.
So from like onsite testing,opioid overdose prevention
resources, food insecurityresources, housing insecurity
resources, substance usedisorder resources, like just
(16:50):
literally everything that youcould possibly provide or do
we're like, if we you know,mental health resources as well.
And so when we brought togetherthe Pride family, we knew that
there was a need.
We kind of already workedtogether, of course, one year at
every once.
Every year we're all togetherat Pride trying to provide all
(17:10):
of these resources and saying,hey, we're all together at pride
trying to provide all of theseresources and saying, hey, we're
all here.
But then we took that model andwe turned it into monthly and
monthly program series, weeklysupport groups and things like
that that were already happeningwithin the organizations, but
then we could link people withmore resources because we were
all working together.
And so it's like having TransMaryland as a partner, like they
(17:32):
are the largest gender markerand name change program in the
state, and so it is so like Iknow the professionals to send
folks to if you are havingcertain issues, Our amazing
LGBTQ plus county liaison, drAmina Johnson, if you are, if we
will put together like we willfix that puzzle and make the
pieces fit, even if we'remissing a couple of them.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
There you are, and I'm definitely a jigsaw person
too, so I understand when youhave that piece missing or that
one piece.
It's going to work.
It's going to work Because,ultimately, what we're going to
look at is a beautiful pictureand that's what we want to
strive for Now, and thank youfor your organization and all
they do so far.
Gosh, let's talk about some ofthe events you talked about.
There's events happening everymonth and, of course, there's
(18:16):
MoCo Pride, the celebration, Ithink, in June.
Let's talk about thatcelebration and what it entails,
and then some of the otheropportunities to come out and
fellowship or to learn, I guessin person or virtually, for
people, either directly orindirectly, or family or friends
or allies, to come together andbe part of the community.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
Absolutely so with our.
So there are, there's a fewdifferent spaces.
I was like, where do we go withthis?
So our Live In your Truth Night, which is a great program that
happens in downtown SilverSpring.
We always try and make ourin-person programs accessible on
the Metro, all of that goodstuff.
So people can, you know, cantravel there and get there very
(19:03):
easily.
Those happen April through June.
You can visitliveinyourtruthorg forward slash
events for our programs, alongwith mocopridecenterorg forward
slash events.
And then we're also building.
We're working on opening twopride resource centers that will
house our organizations formore consistent services as well
(19:26):
.
And so we are working right nowwith the county government.
I don't know how much I can sayabout the space that we have
chosen, but we're working withgeneral services and folks.
Make sure you share the goodnews.
Speaker 2 (19:38):
Oh, we definitely will.
Fantastic.
Well, I'm excited because ofthe resources available.
Residents have access to a warmenvironment and a community of
people to embrace them and helpto uplift us all with all the
diversity and the latestdiversity that I didn't consider
(19:59):
, because you're not onlytalking about being
African-American or being animmigrant or having different
religious beliefs or all thosethings.
Complexity is there and you'readdressing all those things as
well, but when it comes to beinggood allies and being partners
and being a community, it allstarts with a conversation.
(20:21):
Yes, hey, how are you today?
I'm Derek and you'll say I'mPhillip.
And then at what point do Ineed to share?
Or is it appropriate to sharemy pronouns if ever, or just
with my emails?
Or is that showing that I'm anally, if I do have those
pronouns, or just makes iteasier for other people to
(20:43):
communicate with me?
Speaker 3 (20:45):
It is an easy first step.
I encourage you to share yourpronouns all the time because
you know, even if someone asksyou like, hey, why are you
sharing your pronouns, we knowyou're a man, does not matter
Like you're like.
First of all, no, everyone doesnot like someone may see you,
may not see you, who has avision impairment, and the only
time that they speak with you isthrough a computer and they
(21:08):
they're like oh you know, derek,who knows Somebody?
Speaker 2 (21:11):
could have been like I want to be Derek with a woman.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
You know, it's just it's just making sure that
people you can also provide thatatmosphere where it's like you
sometimes queer people don'tfeel comfortable correcting
folks, but like it's our job inspaces to show up for people.
You know, if you ever seesomething that's happening wrong
, you're not going to be, you'renot going to just stand by and
(21:37):
let it happen.
You know what I mean, and thatgoes in our social spaces as
well.
If somebody is being attacked,harassed, misgendered, anything
like that and it's malicious andintentful.
You know, even when I'm with myqueer siblings and community
members in spaces, sometimespeople's pronouns and things
they evolve and so like, andsometimes I forget and I don't
(22:01):
know all of the information andI get corrected and it's like
thank you.
Or sometimes I'll correct folkswhen I'm having a conversation
because no one knows everything.
And even if you do, it's alwaysgood to just not assume and
then to go in with likesometimes we do a check-in, like
one of my team members theother day we were talking I said
let me just check in on yourpronouns and then we checked in
on them and you know I have themwritten down like and they're
(22:23):
already in their signature andeverything.
So introducing your pronouns onin your profile wearing pronoun
pins like that is just a veryeasy and simple way to show that
you are an ally and that you'rea safe space for transgender,
expansive and queer folks.
Fantastic.
Speaker 2 (22:40):
And speaking of transgender, we're going to talk
about that in a little bit.
We have the wonderful Mia hereand we'll talk with her in just
a moment, but before we go,you've shared a lot of great
information, so let's share thewebsite again in different ways
that people can connect with youand your organization, as well
as other organizations that makesense.
Um, and then, uh, maybe shareone last word of wisdom, um,
(23:01):
that you would share with the?
Um Montgomery County at large.
Um, whatever you want to share.
Speaker 3 (23:08):
Okay, absolutely so.
Uh, please visit ummocopridecenterorg.
Forward slash, donate.
Donating dollars is a great wayto contribute.
Visit our website,mocopridecenterorg.
Of course, to get involved, tovolunteer, and volunteering your
time is another way tocontribute and, of course, being
an ally in a safe space,wherever you are, is the best
(23:29):
way to contribute to communityefforts.
And then, what was the lastthing I was supposed to?
Oh, a little tidbit of wisdom.
You know, I said at thebeginning, but I'll say it again
, that you belong, youabsolutely belong, to always,
always, living your truth, andyou have not met all of the
(23:50):
people who are going to love youyet.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
All right, wonderful.
You haven't met all the peoplewho are going to love you yet.
That's what's happening, moco.
Up next we'll be talking to Miawith Trans Maryland.
Thank you so much, derek.
Thank you and welcome back.
We are here with thefantabulous Mia Gordon.
She's a volunteer with TransMaryland.
Welcome, mia, how are you today?
Speaker 4 (24:10):
I'm good.
How are you?
Speaker 2 (24:11):
I'm pretty good.
I'm pretty good, I'm feelingempowered for the conversation
with Phillip and I want tointroduce myself to you.
I'm Derek he him is.
It's a pleasure meeting you,mia.
Speaker 4 (24:22):
Awesome, nice to meet you.
I'm Mia Gordon.
She or they, either one doesn'tmatter.
Speaker 2 (24:27):
All right, well, pleasure meeting you.
And you're with Trans Marylandand for those that aren't
familiar, I think we talkedabout it a little bit in the
last segment.
What does trans reference?
What does the reference mean,trans?
Speaker 4 (24:41):
Trans, as in transgender.
It's an abbreviation.
It means you have changedsomething about your gender.
Either you don't presentexactly as other people would
associate with your gender.
You can identify as non-binary.
You can identify as a differentgender than what you were born
as.
You can just say I don't have agender, I don't, that's not me.
(25:04):
You can say that your genderchanges.
You know based on the day.
You know all sorts of othervariations within gender.
Speaker 2 (25:14):
Wow, that's powerful.
That's very an empoweringstatement that you, you are free
and I think we all are freewithin our community and
collective community inMontgomery County, where we're
so diverse and a lot of us arenow free to express our truths,
and I think what we just learnedjust recently from Phillip is
that it's important that we allare in a safe place to express
(25:35):
our truths.
What does Trans Maryland do forindividuals of the trans nature
?
Speaker 4 (25:42):
Well, so we have several resources.
We do a name and gender changeprogram.
This helps people update theirIDs at the Maryland Motor
Vehicle Administration.
What else Legal paperworkpassports, birth certificates
Trans Maryland also does avirtual support group, t4t
(26:05):
transgender people, for othertransgender people.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
Let's stop right there, though, because I don't
think.
I think that's great, that'sawesome.
Number one I think there's asignificant part in someone's
life where they're they'reshaping their identity to be
more accurate, and you'rehelping them when you say change
their names.
What does that mean for aperson that may not get it that
they're changing their name fromtheir birth name to something
(26:32):
more appropriate to who they are?
Speaker 4 (26:34):
Right.
Some people's names areassociated with genders and you
may associate a given name witha given gender and sometimes you
get it right.
Sometimes you get it wrong,because sometimes there's not
exactly a rhyme or a reason toit.
When someone else names you,when you name yourself, you can
shape it a little more if that'sappropriate or if you've never.
Speaker 2 (26:56):
There are a lot of people who don't really go by
their birth names, but you'reactually helping go through the
process to legally change thename so that, in the eyes of the
eyes of the government, in theeyes of anyone, um, and legally
you sign your checks, um, yousign your name, you, um,
whatever based off of this new,and you guys help with that
process, which can be achallenging process, because if
(27:19):
you didn't know, I don't know, Ididn't know you can, you can do
that easily, and then it maynot be an easy process.
So what?
What are some of the otherthings that your organization
provides?
Speaker 4 (27:29):
Well, the T4T weekly virtual support group is to help
trans people share tips andadvice and vent and support with
each other.
That's a virtual group everyWednesday and weekly.
We also on our website,transmarylandorg.
We offer info on localresources for gender affirming
(27:53):
care and Trans Maryland alsotries to go to a lot of events.
Speaker 2 (27:57):
Oh, wow, okay.
Speaker 4 (27:59):
And when we're there, we try and provide information,
answer people's questions thatthey may have about what trans
maryland, what do we have, youknow?
What do they know aboutmontgomery county resources?
It's.
It's really useful when we meetpeople, and I've met people who
have come up and been like, ohyeah, you guys helped me change
my name, and that's, it's socool I can imagine that being a
(28:24):
significant moment in someone'slife, like a like, a like.
Speaker 2 (28:28):
If you're reading a book.
There's like a, a moment in thebook where, like, something
significant happens andnothing's ever the same again.
It's like the sun is shining.
You know, there's a cloudseparate.
The sun is shining.
Is that one of those moments?
Are there other moments likethat for um, someone in their um
, last part of their, theirlives, being a trans person?
Speaker 4 (28:48):
I think some people have this sort of light bulb
moment where it's sort of likeoh, all these things you know
added up to oh, I guess I amtransgender, I think for other
people it's just sort of aprogressive, you know, like it's
just built up and it's kind ofuneventful.
But I think, sorry, like it'sjust built up and it's kind of
uneventful, but I think sorry,I'm forgetting the question.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
I think I think you answered it very well.
I think you answered it verywell.
It was just that breakthroughmoment I don't think I want to
call it the tipping point whereeverything just floods in and
you become who you are, like aflower having this, petals
evolve, things of that nature.
So, um, what, what do you?
Uh, what, what, what do you, asa volunteer, do with trans
maryland?
(29:32):
Do you work?
Um, how do you work, withindividuals and families?
Speaker 4 (29:37):
so I I was actually at philip's event the pride in
the plaza in june of this yearwhere I tabled it.
I had a great time time I'vetabled at other events where
it's you know, people come upand ask sort of hey, what's your
group, what do you offer?
I've, and you get to go aroundtoo and meet other groups and
(29:58):
learn about their resources andit.
It just builds a bunch ofcamaraderie within the community
.
I've met people and, yeah, I'vemade some good friends along
the way too.
It's it's really nice meetingall these like-minded people who
are really supportive, becausewe're all different but we all
live here and it's all ourcommunity.
Speaker 2 (30:16):
Yeah, yeah, it is.
What are some of the thingsthat you have advice for the
person that is maybe evolving tounderstanding who they are as a
trans person or potentiallytrans person?
What advice do you have for ayoung person or older person and
what are the next steps throughTrans Maryland?
How can you guys help thatperson?
Speaker 4 (30:39):
Right.
I think 2024 is a great time tobe trans.
I realize we have the electionand there's some pessimism, but
I think the communities evolvedso much over even a decade where
it seems much more safer safernot totally safe, but safer to
explore your own gender, and Ithink there were people who put
(31:02):
it off, and there are people whoare never quite figured it out
and or are young and they're ata point where they're allowed or
they feel more capable andempowered in order to explore
their own gender.
I think it's awesome that welive in a time where people can
explore their gender and sort offind out where they want to fit
in within the gender spectrum,how they'd like to label
(31:25):
themselves and just how they'dlike to be seen by others and
communicate that outwards.
I think once you apply a labelto yourself and other people are
familiar with your label, theycan help see literally see you
Right.
Speaker 2 (31:41):
So what advice do you have for families of a trans
person that has now embraced whothey are, they have their new
name and they introducethemselves to the family.
Or maybe a younger person who'snot fully able to totally
transition with the name etc.
But they've identified thatthey themselves as now being
(32:02):
trans.
How should families react andwhat are some of the best
practices for families to showsupport for that person at that
time?
Speaker 4 (32:12):
I would say be supportive.
I mean, if these are yourfamily members, if you loved
them before, I would hope youwould still love them after.
You're better.
Okay, there you go, Right right, and if you had issues before,
I don't think this will solveyour issues, but I hope it
doesn't exacerbate them either.
Families are complex.
(32:34):
Yes, they are.
But I would say be supportive,Ask people what they need.
I think sometimes trans needsaren't always as obvious as
other people's needs is asobvious as other people's needs.
Yes, some people are very much.
I'm trans, but I want to live avery you know, picket, fence,
chicken in every pot, TV inevery room lifestyle kids you
(32:57):
know, and others are just likeno, I'm abandoning all of that.
This is what I want to do.
I'm not going to have kids.
Maybe I'll settle down when I'm40 or 50 or never, and you just
kind of have to supporteveryone what they want to do.
I think it's not that muchdifferent than just having a kid
(33:18):
who's different from you, orhaving a parent who you don't
quite relate to, or a siblingthat you're not very close to.
Speaker 2 (33:24):
How about that yeah?
Speaker 4 (33:26):
But you support them.
You say, hey, you found thatthing that you like Good for you
.
You're doing this, that'sawesome.
I support you.
Speaker 2 (33:34):
Well, Mia, good for you and good for Trans Maryland
for all that you're doing forfamilies and individuals in
Montgomery County, but also inthe greater state of Maryland,
and I'm sure that you guys arehelping to influence things
nationwide as well.
What are the contactinformation or how do you want
people to reach out to TransMaryland If they have questions,
(33:55):
if they need resources?
What's the best first step?
Speaker 4 (33:59):
Transmarylandorg is our website.
If you want, you can go.
There's a mailing list optionon there.
There's also a fundraisingoption.
Speaker 2 (34:08):
Oh, okay, you can't do anything without money, right
?
Speaker 4 (34:13):
Someone has to provide the money.
And if you have money, we wouldlike it.
If you're interested in ourresources, the website has them.
We have some upcoming name andgender marker change clinics, so
if you need to update one ofthose, we also do that virtually
because I know I know we havesome upcoming events in
Baltimore but you may not haveaccess to get to Baltimore and
(34:38):
we're currently in MontgomeryCounty.
The virtual stuff definitelycovers Montgomery County and,
yeah, I think just trying tobring people together and really
support the trans community, Ithink that's what Trans Maryland
does really well.
Speaker 2 (34:54):
Fantastic and thank you so much for volunteering.
Thank you, it's one thing toserve because that's your
calling, and then that's kind ofyour role.
It becomes your occupation.
But when you're serving out oflove and out of compassion and
help and hope for your fellowperson, that means quite a lot.
Well, thank you so much, mia,she.
(35:15):
They All right.
I got that right Perfect.
And that's what's happening inMoCo.
We're striving to be a better,more understanding, a more
loving county, and that's what'shappening.
Thank you so much me for beinghere.
Do you have anything else youwant to add before we go?
Speaker 4 (35:30):
Be kind to each other .
Speaker 2 (35:32):
Of course, be kind to one another, and that's a good
way to close out this year.
Be kind to one another, eachother.
Be kind to yourselves.
Enjoy yourselves at the closeof this year, because this is
going to come out in lateDecember.
I this year, because this isgoing to come out in late
December.
I'm wishing all of you a happyhappy new year full of love,
understanding and peace, thankyou, thank you.
Speaker 1 (35:52):
Thanks for listening to what's Happening MoCo.
Please subscribe via yourfavorite podcasting platform and
follow us on Facebook.
This podcast is brought to youby County Cable Montgomery, your
source for news and informationfrom the Montgomery County
Government.
Connect with us via cable,Facebook, Instagram or YouTube
(36:14):
by searching for County CableMoCo.
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