CINEMATIC SECRETS | Closeted Shadows: The Torment of Rock Hudson - When Walls Can Talk: The Podcast | Where Paranormal Mysteries and Dark History Collide

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
The following episode includes content of a sexual
and adult nature and is intendedfor mature audiences.
Listener, discretion is advised.

Speaker 2 (00:08):
In Hollywood of the 1950s.
Audiences around the world werecaptivated by Rock Hudson.
He surpassed the title oficonic American movie star.
He was a symbol of masculinityhandsome, rugged and
irresistibly charming ofmasculinity.
Handsome, rugged andirresistibly charming.

(00:29):
The number one box office drawin the country, rock Hudson
seemed like the epitome of theAmerican dream.
But what if I told you thatthis perfect man was living a
lie that nearly destroyed himBehind the scenes, hudson's life
was a carefully constructedfacade, built by those he
trusted and shaped arounddevastating secrets.
As a queer person, rock Hudson'sstory resonates deeply with me.

(00:59):
As a queer person, rockHudson's story resonates deeply
with me In another world oranother time.
His experience could have beenmine and for hundreds of queer
individuals it was.
Rock's celebrity status allowsus to know his story in greater
detail, but his struggle was oneshared by many who lived and

(01:23):
suffered in silence.
It's a bit different from ourusual deep dives into specific
movies, but it's a story thatdeeply embodies the concept of a
cinematic secret and the darkside of the silver screen, a
side of Hollywood that many onlyknow in fragments, if at all.
Rock Hudson's struggle wasn'tjust a personal battle.

(01:45):
It was a societal one.
When the AIDS crisis hit,decades of secrets and lies were
exposed, forever changing thecourse of history.
This is the story of RockHudson, the romantic comedy star
who symbolized Americanmasculinity, and what happened
when his carefully crafted imagewas shattered.

(02:06):
It's a tale of hidden truths,societal pressures and the
mental torture that comes withliving a double life.
Beyond the silver screen, aworld of dreams and fantasies
unfolds.
They call me Mr Tibbs.

(02:29):
You can't handle the truth, butwithin its shadows, a hidden
realm of intrigue and mysteryawaits.

Speaker 4 (02:37):
Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn.
I could have been a contender.
Of all the gin joints in allthe towns in all the world, she
walks into mine.

Speaker 2 (02:52):
Cinematic Secrets beckons you to journey into the
depths where untold storiesshape the films we cherish,
uncover the secrets thatpropelled these classics to
greatness and unearth the darkertruths lurking beneath the
surface.
Beyond the glamour and allurelies a hidden narrative, a side

(03:12):
untold.
This time we lift the curtainand peer into the darkness that
resides in the very heart of thesilver screen.
Journey with us as we explorethe forbidden corners where
truth blends with fiction andlegends are born.
This is Cinematic Secrets thedark side of the silver screen.

(03:34):
Our story begins during theharshest years of the Great
Depression in a crampedone-bedroom bungalow in Winnetka
, illinois.
The home held an extendedfamily of 11, all squeezed into

(03:55):
this tiny space.
Struggling to get by Amidst thechaos and scarcity was a happy
kid named Roy Jr, who lovedplaying on the nearby farms and
entertaining his cousins, auntsand uncles who lived under the
same crowded roof.
But not everything was joyfulin young Roy's life.
His father, roy Sr, felt nostrong bond to the family.

(04:18):
When Roy Jr was just six yearsold, he came home from a
relative's farm to devastatingnews.
His mother explained that hisdad had packed a suitcase and
walked out on them.
This abandonment was a turningpoint for Roy Jr.
The once lively boy became sadand withdrawn, enveloped by a

(04:38):
sense of loneliness.
Family members noticed heseemed to lose interest in most
things except one Movies.
Roy would disappear into localtheaters, finding solace in the
flickering lights of the silverscreen.
It was here he developed hisfirst crush on handsome leading

(04:59):
man John Hall and dreamed ofjoining his screen idols as an
actor himself.
Roy once confided to a friendabout a reoccurring dream he had
.
In the dream he saw a diamondsurrounded by points of light.
He'd wake up and tell himselfthat that diamond was him,
destined to shine brightly oneday, escaping the confines of

(05:22):
Winnetka to become a famousmovie star.
But dreams like these were keptsecret, especially after his
mother remarried, escaping theconfines of Winnetka to become a
famous movie star.
But dreams like these were keptsecret, especially after his
mother remarried WallaceFitzgerald.
His new stepfather was a sternand unforgiving man who believed
Roy Jr was too weak.
Wallace confiscated many toyshe deemed girly, punished Roy

(05:45):
for showing emotion and when Royrevealed his aspiration to be
an actor, wallace beat him.
Roy Harold Scherer Jr, the boywho would become Rock Hudson,
learned early in life thatsurvival often meant lying about
who he was and what he loved, acore tenet of his identity he
was never truly able to shake,until the tragic end of his life
.
Of his identity he was nevertruly able to shake.

(06:05):
Until the tragic end of hislife, only a few trusted people
knew about his ambition tobecome an actor.
One of them was his mother, whowanted to help him achieve his
dreams.
Shortly after Roy graduatedfrom high school, his mother
made a bold decision.
She left her abusive secondhusband and together she and Roy
moved to Pasadena, california,to be closer to Hollywood.

(06:28):
While Roy studied acting at USC, they hoped to carve out a new
life in the heart of the filmindustry.
But there was another reasonthat drew them to the West Coast
.
After Roy's biological fatherwalked out on them, he settled

(06:53):
in Los Angeles and opened anappliance store not far from the
USC campus.
Roy had spent years longing fora connection with his father.
One day between classes, hetracked down his father's
address, mustered his courageand showed up unannounced.
At first the reunion washeartwarming.
His father welcomed him in andeven offered Roy a place to stay
while he attended school.
It seemed like a chance to mendtheir fractured relationship.
But everything changed when Royrevealed his dream of becoming

(07:15):
an actor, his father recoiled,dismissing, acting as unstable,
and urged Roy to abandon hisdreams and join him in the
appliance business instead.
Desperate for his father'sapproval, roy agreed to give it
a try.
For six grueling months, hisfather sent him door to door
selling vacuum cleaners, butdespite his best efforts, roy

(07:38):
didn't sell a single one.
His heart just wasn't in it.
Sensing his son's lack ofpassion for retail, his father
fired him and kicked him out ofthe house, shattering Roy's
hopes for a reconciledrelationship.
With no money coming in, roy hadto drop out of USC and take the
only job he could find drivinga delivery truck.

(08:00):
Determined to keep his actingdream alive, he bought the best
suit he could afford a shabbyoutfit that barely fit Between
deliveries.
He'd drive to the gates ofmovie studios, change into his
ill-fitting suit and hang aroundoutside, hoping to be noticed
by producers among theindividuals seeking for work as
extras in whatever was currentlybeing filmed, but it was all in

(08:24):
vain.
Extras in whatever wascurrently being filmed, but it
was all in vain.
Rejected, ignored, roy's dreamof becoming a star seemed
totally out of reach.
After all, how does a truckdriver become a movie star.
Anyway.
As he pondered his next steps,roy stumbled upon a world he
never knew existed.
In the mid-1940s, los Angeleshad a relatively large gay scene

(08:47):
.
If you knew where to look.
Homosexuality was consideredboth a crime and a mental
illness, forcing queer people tolive quietly and underground.
In a later memoir, roy recalledthe first time he stumbled into
a bar where a drag queen wassinging risque songs to an
audience of men.
He joined them and to hissurprise, they invited him to a

(09:10):
nearby beach favored by gay men.
Coming from a smallconservative town, roy had never
known any openly queer peoplebefore, but now he had friends,
people he didn't have to hidefrom.
Even better, some of these newfriends worked in showbiz.
In the midst of his new socialscene, roy encountered a couple

(09:33):
named Mark and George.
They were a few years olderthan Roy and both working actors
, offering him a window into aworld of stability and domestic
happiness he had never known.
They took him under their wing,providing the kind of
supportive father figures he hadalways yearned for.
Mark and George's happy,committed relationship ignited a

(09:55):
spark of hope in Roy.
He saw a future in them wherehe too could find love and
companionship.
That hope was realized when amutual friend introduced him to
Ken Hodge, a charismatic radioproducer.
From the moment they met, theattraction between Roy and Ken
was undeniable.
They quickly became inseparableand before long they moved into

(10:19):
a cozy apartment together inHollywood.
Ken, with his extensiveexperience and connections in
the radio industry, wasdetermined to help Roy achieve
his dreams of stardom.
Taking on the role of Roy'sunofficial agent, ken arranged
for professional headshotsshowcasing Roy's striking
features and potential.

(10:39):
He introduced Roy to hiscolleagues, opening doors that
had previously been firmly shut.
Ken even hosted glamorousparties where Roy could mingle
with industry insiders,expanding his network and
getting closer to his dream.
It was likely at one of Ken'slively parties that Roy crossed

(10:59):
paths with Henry Wilson, apowerful Hollywood agent known
for representing some of thebiggest stars of the time.
But Henry had a dark reputation, pressuring his clients for
sexual favors in exchange forany work.
Intrigued by Roy's potential,henry extended an invitation for
a private meeting at his houseto discuss Roy's future in

(11:22):
Hollywood.
When Roy arrived, henry wasprepared.
As he watched Roy approach thehouse, he turned on the
sprinklers.
By the time Roy reached thedoor, his cheap suit was soaked
through.
Henry welcomed him in helpinghim out of the drenched clothes
and then made his pitch.

(11:42):
He promised to make Roy a star,but there was one significant
obstacle.
Ken, roy's boyfriend andunofficial agent, henry, made it
clear that if Roy wanted hishelp, he'd have to cut all ties
with Ken.
It was a heart-wrenchingdecision.
Henry had connections with themost powerful people in

(12:04):
Hollywood, working closely withmajor studios and already
transforming many aspiringactors into household names.
He could open doors that Ken,despite his best efforts, could
never access.
Roy returned to Ken with a heavyheart, explaining that he was
going to sign with Henry.
To Ken with a heavy heart,explaining that he was going to

(12:28):
sign with Henry.
Was he rationalized?
Just good business?
Ken was devastated, feelingbetrayed and heartbroken.
He moved out of the apartmentthey shared.
Unable to bear the pain or facetheir mutual friends.
Ken relocated to Europe and,according to his family, ken
never fell in love again.
Roy hadn't meant to hurt Ken,but the damage was done, with

(12:52):
his relationship in ruins.
Roy was now in the predatoryclutches of the powerful agent
Henry Wilson, who was determinedto make him a star.
One of Henry's first moves wasto give Roy a tougher, more
marketable name Rock Hudson.
However, some close to Royclaimed it was actually Ken who

(13:13):
came up with the name, a factHenry conveniently overlooked.
Regardless of who named him, bythe late 1940s Roy Jr was
undergoing a dramatictransformation.
From an awkward aspiring actor,he was becoming Rock Hudson,

(13:35):
the epitome of Americanmasculinity.
But despite his new manlymoniker, rock wasn't an easy
sell.
He lacked formal training andwas painfully shy, often making
poor first impressions.
Henry Wilson took it uponhimself to refine Rock's image.
He coached him to appearsophisticated and worldly, often
advising him to lie about hisage to seem more experienced.

(13:56):
Yet in an early meeting withthe producer, when asked how old
he was, rock was so flusteredthat he turned to Henry and
asked how old am I?
Henry saw bigger problems,though.
He considered Rock's mannerismstoo effeminate.
He criticized Rock'shigh-pitched voice, his frequent

(14:20):
giggling and the way he swayedhis hips.
Henry watched Rock like a hawk,even going so far as to smack
his hand when he held acigarette too loosely or
corrected his hip movements withphysical reprimands.
Despite the intense training,rock struggled to shed his
nervousness.
In one infamous meeting withLucille Ryman Carroll, head of

(14:44):
talent at MGM, rock tripped overhis own feet and nearly smashed
a glass table.
Henry caught him just in time.
But Lucille noticed Henryholding Rock's hand for the rest
of the meeting.
To her it looked like they werelovers a significant problem
given MGM's anti-gay hiringpolicies for their stars.
They relegated gay men toart-related roles, particularly
in the stylized era of silentfilms that was rapidly coming to

(15:06):
an end, but never leading parts.
Sensing that Rock wouldn't lasta minute at MGM, lucille
politely thanked them for theirtime and sent them on their way.
Desperation can lead to boldmoves, and that's exactly what
Henry Wilson did when he broughtRock Hudson to meet Raoul Walsh
, a director known for his tough, no-nonsense style.

(15:28):
Walsh specialized in grittygangster films, intense war
movies and rugged westerns.
He wasn't initially impressedwith Rock's acting chops, but he
needed a good-looking face forhis upcoming World War II film
Fighter Squadron.
Walsh's reaction was blunt.
Quote the very least he'll makegood scenery.

(15:49):
He signed Rock to a one-yearcontract and had him report to
the set for the film.
It was Rock's first foray intothe world of cinema, but his
role was minimal, mostlybackground, with a line or two.
Even in this minor part Rockstruggled.
Unfamiliar with the nuances offilm acting, he frequently stood

(16:10):
in the wrong spots, blockingthe camera and ruining takes His
big line you're gonna need abigger blackboard became
infamous on set for how often heflubbed it.
Eventually it was reassigned toanother actor and Rock was left
with a simpler line, deliveredoff-camera Pretty soon, you're
going to have to write smallernumbers.

(16:31):
Walsh, exasperated by Rock'sinexperience, had already
committed to a contract andcouldn't simply let him go.
So Walsh found other use forhim sending Rock to run errands,
paint Walsh's house and drivehis car.
Seeing no potential, he decidedto cut his losses and sold
Rock's contract to Universal,feeling fortunate to be rid of

(16:54):
him.
Initially discouraged, thistwist of fate turned out to be a
blessing for Rock.
Universal at the time had anacting school dedicated to
nurturing new talent.
Here Rock finally received theformal training he desperately
needed.
Transforming Rock Hudson into ascreen-ready star took immense

(17:16):
effort from many.
Universal's acting school wascrucial, offering him lessons in
acting, diction and presence.
It was a rigorous process, butit began to mold him into the
Hollywood icon he wouldeventually become.
In post-World War II, americaaudiences craved leading men who
were almost cartoonishly rugged, unemotional, assertive, brave

(17:40):
and digressive.
These qualities were nearly thecomplete opposite of Rock
Hudson in real life.
At Universal's acting school,his instructors were determined
to transform him into this ideal.
They drilled him on deliveringlines with confidence and
enrolled him in lessons forboxing, horseback riding and
even sword fighting.
Rock faced an uphill battle indeveloping a more macho persona,

(18:03):
but he was committed.
Over time, his fellow studentsbegan to notice a shift in him.
One of these students wasYvonne DiCarlo, the future Lily
Munster, who appeared with himin several films.
She observed Rock's styleevolving.

(18:24):
He was becoming more confident,swaggering and bold.
The teachers didn't relent.
One vocal coach took aparticularly extreme approach.
He had Rock deliberately getsick and then scream for hours
to tear his vocal cords, hopingthey'd sound deeper when they
healed.
Amazingly, this method worked,but it came at a high cost.
Rock lost his ability to singwell for the rest of his life.

(18:49):
Meanwhile, universal's PR teamwas hard at work crafting Rock's
public image as a rugged newstar.
They planted new stories andarranged a photo shoot featuring
Rock and his roommate, actorBon Preeble, engaging in
traditionally masculineactivities around the house.
Ironically, these photos mightappear today as depicting a gay

(19:09):
couple with intense sexualtension, which is even more
ironic considering.
In reality, when the camerasweren't rolling, rock and Bob
were casually hooking up on aregular basis, a truth the
public never suspected At thetime.
The photos were received as anintimate glimpse behind closed
doors at a pair of confident,attractive Hollywood

(19:30):
heterosexual bachelors.
As Rock's personal life andpublic persona grew increasingly
divergent and the world tooknotice of his staggeringly
handsome face and Adonis-likephysique, the pressures only
continued to mount.
He was living a double life,navigating the precarious
balance between who he truly wasand who Hollywood wanted him to

(19:53):
be, all while beginning to geta taste of the life he had been
dreaming of since living in hiscramped one-bedroom bungalow.
To him, everything had beenworth it.
Despite all the training andeffort, hollywood executives
still relegated Rock Hudson tominor roles in low-budget action
films.
As his contract neared its end,the threat of being out of work

(20:16):
with few prospects loomed large.
Sensing the urgency, his agent,henry Wilson, believed Rock
just needed more publicity tocapture Hollywood's attention.
So in late 1949, henryconcocted a bold plan.
Every year, hollywood starsgathered for the Photographer's

(20:38):
Ball, a grand costume partywhere celebrities donned
outrageous outfits and invitedpaparazzi to capture the
spectacle and help garner newattention.
The event was a win-winPhotographers got sensational
photos to sell and starsreceived a flood of free press.
Henry decided to make Rock thestar of the show, by pairing him

(21:00):
with Vera Ellen, a hugelypopular actress and truly one of
my absolute favorites from theera.
You may remember her as thesensational dancer made famous
as one of the Haynes sisters inthe classic film White Christmas
.
To ensure they stood out, heordered them to strip down and
cover themselves in gold paintand carry swords, transforming

(21:21):
them into living Oscar statues.
As soon as Rock and Vera Ellenentered the ball, they were
swarmed by photographers.
The stunt worked brilliantly.
For weeks, newspapers andmagazines were plastered with
photos of the dazzling duo.
This sudden surge of publicitycaught the attention of two

(21:43):
influential executives atUniversal.
One was Ross Hunter, himself acloseted gay producer celebrated
for his glamorous soap operamelodramas.
The other was Ed Mull, who hada more straight-laced public
persona but, according to Rock,would occasionally summon him to
his office for privaterendezvous.
The publicity from thephotographer's ball convinced

(22:06):
Hunter and Mull that Rock'stalent was being squandered in
pulpy action films.
They saw potential for him inromantic roles and had the
perfect project in mind.
Rock's big break came with afilm called Magnificent
Obsession.
In this movie, rock played aselfish, rich playboy who, after

(22:28):
causing an accident that blindsa widow, falls in love with her
.
Determined to win her heart, hepretends to be a selfless hero.
By the end of the film, herlove transforms him and he
realizes that the kind, generouspersona he'd been pretending to
be is who he was truly meant tobe.
This role was pivotal for Rock,marking the beginning of a

(22:49):
reoccurring theme in his careerPlaying men who pretend to be
someone they're not.
And he nailed it.
Magnificent Obsession was asignificant hit, with Rock
perfectly embodying the post-warideal of confident, strong
masculinity.
He shared excellent chemistrywith his co-star, jane Wyman.

(23:10):
Fun fact, jane Wyman hadrecently divorced her first
husband, a struggling actornamed Ronald Reagan, who would
re-enter Rock's life in apivotal way.
Many decades later.
With the success of MagnificentObsession, it became clear that
these were the roles Rock wasdestined to play.
If he wasn't born for them, hewas certainly shaped for them.

(23:33):
Through the intensive trainingof his agent, teachers and the
carefully crafted PR team aroundhim, he became the perfect
archetype of Americanmasculinity of the time.
The success was followed by astring of popular romances, many
produced by gay men who saw inRock the ideal leading man or

(23:53):
simply shamelessly lusted overhim.
Following the success ofMagnificent Obsession, rock
Hudson starred in a series ofhits like All that Heaven Allows
, one Desire and Never SayGoodbye.
These movies played perfectlyto the 1950s ideal of the
American man, and audiencesflocked to see Rock.

(24:14):
Universal Studios and HenryWilson worked tirelessly to
maintain this persona in reallife as well.
They staged dates with variousstarlets and planted news
stories about his supposedromantic escapades.
But this public image was asfictional as the characters he
portrayed on screen.
The real Rock Hudson was a shyhomebody who enjoyed needlepoint

(24:36):
cooking and crosswords.
When he wasn't working, hepreferred the company of Mark
and George, the couple who hadtaken him under their wings
years ago.
On set he was known for hisplayful flirtations with other
actors.
Despite the public facade of aman searching for the right
woman, the truth was that Rockwas yearning to find the right

(24:59):
man.
If there was any aspect of hispublic persona, especially on
camera, that hinted at the realhim, it was his roles and
character as a hopeless romantic.
But while his characters foundlove on screen, rock's reality
was far more complicated andpainful.
Rock Hudson's life was abittersweet tale of achieving

(25:19):
his dreams yet never being ableto fully live them.
He had reached the pinnacle ofHollywood success, yet he
couldn't be celebrated for whohe truly was.
The constant need to hide histrue identity was a heavy burden
.
The loneliness and theemotional strain of living a
double life, of longing foracceptance but knowing it was
always out of reach, is hard toimagine for us today, but was a

(25:42):
painful reality for so many overthe years.
For Rock, the applause andadmiration from fans were a
hollow echo, masking a deep,unfulfilled yearning for genuine
love and acceptance.
Rock Hudson's close friends,mark and George, knew he was
searching for love.
One evening they invited Rockto dinner with a friend named

(26:06):
Jack Navar, another handsomeyoung actor who, coincidentally,
was also a client of HenryWilson.
Jack was incredibly nervousabout meeting Rock and spent
most of the evening avoiding him.
But after dinner Rock struck upa conversation with Jack,
sensing the chemistry betweenthem.
Mark and George discreetlyturned down the lights and

(26:28):
stepped outside.
The evening culminated in Rockinviting Jack back to his place.
What started with listening tomusic soon led to dinner and
eventually to Rock's bedroom.
This marked the beginning of apassionate, whirlwind romance
between Rock and Jack.
They soon moved in together,spending nearly all their time
in each other's company.

(26:49):
They even alternated havingdinners with each other's
mothers.
But their relationship had toremain hidden from the public
eye, necessitating elaboratemeasures to maintain their
secret.
To keep up appearances, rockand Jack engineered their dates
to look like business meetings.
They frequented restaurantswith friends, ensuring there was

(27:10):
at least one woman or an oddnumber of men at the table.
To avoid suspicion, they neverallowed themselves to be
photographed together,maintaining an air of
professional detachment inpublic.
Rock's friend, joe Carbery,recalls that during that time
nobody lived openly as gay,especially in Hollywood.
Rock longed to, but thesocietal pressures and risks

(27:32):
were too great.
This secrecy bothered himdeeply.
To express their lovediscreetly, rock and Jack
developed a sweet private code.
When they wanted to say I loveyou, without arousing suspicion,
they'd knock three times onwhatever surface was available
to them.
However, not everyone saw thingsthe same way.

(27:54):
Henry Wilson, who was nostranger to casual flings
himself, many of which were withhis own clients in his office
and of questionableconsensuality, was fine with the
occasional hookup, but heviewed committed relationships
as a significant risk.
They could lead to exposure andgossip.
However, in my personal opinion, I think he might have also

(28:17):
considered their relationshipsas a threat to his control and
domination over them, or perhapsa reflection of his extreme
jealousy when they were single.
He could control every elementof these wildly handsome,
impressionable young men willingto do anything for the
opportunity at stardom.
Relationships took that poweraway.

(28:38):
One of Rock Hudson's laterboyfriends, lee Garlington, said
we were ordered by Henry Wilson, that evil agent of his, never
to have our picture takentogether because somebody would
see it and know that we were gay.
The longer Rock and Jack stayedtogether, the more Henry Wilson
wanted to drive them apart,just as he had done with Rock's
previous boyfriend, ken.

(28:59):
Henry found his next opportunityto destroy Rock's love life
when he was in Italy shootingthe film Captain Lightfoot.
He called up Jack and casuallysuggested Rock's away.
And you're just sitting there.
Why don't you and Phyllis takea trip?
Phyllis was Henry's secretary,phyllis Gates, a young woman
from the Midwest who had movedto LA a few years earlier.

(29:21):
She was around the same age asRock and Jack and was friendly
with many of Henry's clients.
Henry told Jack that Phyllishad a vacation coming up and no
one to go with, suggesting thatJack keep her company.
Thinking it sounded like a funidea, jack borrowed Rock's car,
picked up Phyllis and theyheaded out for a drive.
By all accounts, the trip wasuneventful.

(29:44):
However, the story that reachedRock was quite different.
Somehow word got to Rock thatJack had been hosting wild
orgies at Rock's own house whilehe was away, that the police
had been called and that thehome had been robbed Furious.
Rock called Jack and the twohad a heated argument.
Jack explained that he wasn'teven in town and asked Henry to

(30:06):
corroborate his story, but Henryrefused.
He told Jack that hisrelationship with Rock was a
threat to Rock's career and thathe and his associates at
Universal would do anything intheir power to come between them
.
According to Jack, henry'swords were menacing quote the
studio is capable of takingextreme measures to protect a

(30:27):
property.
Jack Henry's words weremenacing quote Feeling terrible
and seeing that Rock wassurrounded by people determined
to keep him isolated, jackrealized their relationship
couldn't survive under suchconditions.
When Rock returned from Italy,he found that Jack had moved out
, leaving behind a heartbrokenRock.
Rock's life was filled withsuch painful episodes where

(30:50):
personal happiness wasconstantly sacrificed by others
for the sake of his career.
He was deeply unhappy about howthings ended with Jack, but
Henry Wilson was delighted.
With Jack out of the picture,henry could orchestrate more
heterosexual publicity for hisclient.
This was becoming increasinglyurgent.
By this point, rock was nearinghis thirties and, despite being

(31:13):
seen on numerous dates withwomen, there was no indication
of any serious relationship.
In the mid-1950s, it was unusualfor a 29-year-old star not to
be in a steady relationship ormarried.
Hollywood had an unwritten rulefor its actors, both gay and
straight Thou shalt be married,happily and respectably married,

(31:34):
whether you like it or not.
Magazines started to takenotice and Life ran an article
openly demanding that Rock getmarried or explain why not.
To quell the rumors, henryarranged for Rock to go on dates
in highly public places with afamiliar face, his secretary,
phyllis Gates.
By all accounts, rock andPhyllis Gates.
By all accounts, rock andPhyllis got along well.

(31:56):
They shared a sense of humor,had many interests in common and
enjoyed each other's company.
Some people who knew them evenclaimed that Phyllis had dated
women.
However, phyllis later deniedthis, insisting she had no idea
Rock was gay until years later.
The truth remains elusive,however.
Given her later reaction, Ifind this hard to believe myself

(32:18):
.
For context, in the 1950s,homosexuality was so taboo that
it was never discussed in politecompany.
An accusation could end aperson's career or even send
them to prison as a result.
It was considered polite toignore any talk about
homosexuality or to deny itoutright.

(32:38):
Even among queer people,denying that someone was gay was
seen as the ethical and loyalthing to do, a way of protecting
that person and being a goodfriend.
This complicated landscapemakes it hard to determine who
knew what.
Regardless, rock and Phyllisgrew close and were often seen
together, which helped to quellsome of the gossip about Rock,

(33:01):
but not all of it.
Certain individuals weredetermined to destroy Rock's
career.
Among the tabloids of the 1950s, the dirtiest and sleaziest was
a magazine called Confidential,owned by right-wing Republican
Robert Harrison, who despisedhomosexuals.
Confidential aimed primarily toexpose closeted celebrities and

(33:22):
destroy their careers.
As one of Harrison's reportersput it, hollywood should be
grateful or doing the industry afavor by exposing all these
perverts, or doing the industrya favor by exposing all these
perverts.
Rock's friends, mark and George, recalled the pervasive fear
among gay men in Hollywood.

(33:42):
George later said quoteHarrison had a network of
informants and was relentless intracking down people who could
ruin Rock's life.
The first target was Rock'sformer roommate, bob, the same
one he hooked up with and was inall those photos with.

(34:03):
All those years ago, harrisonapproached Bob with an offer of
$10,000 to spill everything heknew about Rock's personal life.
That's around $115,000 intoday's money.
Bob had lived with Rock, hookedup with him and knew all the
intimate details.
However, bob turnedconfidential down.
Some say it was because Rockhad already paid Bob more to

(34:25):
keep quiet.
Next, harrison found someonewith potentially more damaging
information and a possible axeto grind Jack Navar, rock's
ex-boyfriend, whom Henry Wilsonhad driven away.
Jack's acting career wasfaltering and he needed cash.
Harrison's offer of $10,000 wasa significant sum.
Jack considered the offer butultimately made a different call

(34:47):
, not to Harrison but to HenryWilson, tipping him off about
the plot to take down Rock.
Despite the tough times he wasfacing, jack wouldn't betray his
former lover.
Henry, however, didn't shareJack's sense of honor.
Upon hearing of Confidential'splans, he reached out to
Harrison with a deal In exchangefor dropping the Rock Hudson

(35:11):
story, he offered dirt on someof his other clients,
sacrificing his career forRock's.
Harrison accepted the deal andConfidential ran an expose on
another actor instead, tabHunter.
Despite the deal withConfidential, henry Wilson knew
Rock Hudson's safety wasprecarious.

(35:31):
Rumor circulated that anotherformer lover had compromising
photos of Rock and intended touse them for blackmail.
Henry, determined to protecthis star, hired a private
investigator to locate the manand retrieve the incriminating
material.
When the man refused to handover the photos, henry's goons

(35:52):
resorted to violence, beatinghim up and taking the pictures
by force.
Rock's numerous close calls ledhis friend George to remark
that Rock either had an angel onhis shoulder or had made a pact
with the devil.
Henry Wilson knew that meredamage control wouldn't suffice
forever.
They needed a more permanentsolution to the constant threat

(36:12):
of exposure.
In the summer of 1955, rockwalked into Henry's office with
a small box in hand.
He handed it to Phyllis Gates.
Henry's secretary.
Rock told her it was a gifthe'd received for appearing on a
TV show.
When Phyllis opened the box,she found a diamond ring inside.
When Phyllis opened the box,she found a diamond ring inside.

(36:33):
Confused and surprised, shelooked at Rock, who insisted I
want you to have it.
Phyllis, unsure if this was aproposal initially refused, but
Rock was adamant.
Details of what happened nextare murky and vary depending on
who tells the story.
Nevertheless, a few weeks later, rock and Phyllis were at a

(36:54):
courthouse filling out amarriage certificate.
Phyllis claimed that she andRock had fallen in love quickly
and couldn't wait to marry.
However, some of Rock's friendsbelieved that Henry and
Universal executives hadpressured Rock into the marriage
to quash the persistent rumorsabout his sexuality.
Regardless of how it happened,it was clear that Henry Wilson

(37:16):
orchestrated the entire event.
He even chose Phyllis's dress.
After the ceremony, instead ofcalling their families, rock and
Phyllis were instructed tocontact reporters.
The marriage was a majorsurprise and quickly became
headline news.
The marriage was a majorsurprise and quickly became
headline news, dominatingcelebrity magazines for weeks.
Any rumors about Rock'shomosexuality were effectively

(37:43):
drowned out, much to the delightof Henry and Universal.
Initially, it seemed Rock andPhyllis had a genuine connection
.
They went on double dates withMark and George and to their
friends they appeared warm andaffectionate.
However, the public image of ahappily married couple was
another carefully constructedfacade to protect Rock's career.
While Rock Hudson's personallife was filled with turmoil and

(38:04):
secrecy, his career wasthriving like never before.
Offers were flooding in and oneof the most enticing came from
renowned director George Stevens.
Stevens was set to direct afilm adaptation of the book
Giant, a multi-generational epicabout an oil family, a sort of
precursor to the TV show Dynasty.
Stevens admired Rock'son-screen charisma and manly

(38:29):
swagger and wanted him for thelead role of Bick Benedict, a
strong yet stubborn oil tycoonwhose determination borders on
self-destruction.
Rock was eager to take on therole.
It was more complex and nuancedthan the flawless, perfect
heroes he'd been portraying.
But there was an obstacle Giantwas a Warner Brothers production

(38:50):
and Rock was under contractwith Universal.
Stevens requested thatUniversal loan Rock out for the
film, but the studio executivesinitially refused.
The shoot was expected to belengthy and Universal didn't
want to lose their top star formonths.
Rock, however, was determinedto secure the role.

(39:10):
According to some sources, hetook his case directly to Ed
Moll, universal's head ofproduction, who was rumored to
have a desperate crush on Rock.
According to Rock, ed usuallyspent their time together on his
knees.
Whatever transpired during thatmeeting, it worked.
Shortly afterward, rock's loanout to Warner Brothers was

(39:33):
approved, clearing the way forhim to star in Giant.
This role would prove to be aturning point in Rock's career,
showcasing his ability to handlemore complex and challenging
characters.
Before filming began, directorGeorge Stevens told Rock that
Bick Benedict needed to berugged, virile, a paragon of

(39:53):
masculinity, a type of characterRock had played countless times
.
But Stevens wanted more thanjust the usual bravado.
He wanted depth, a hiddenemotional side that only those
closest to the character couldsee.
To help Rock prepare, stevenstook him to a screening room
where he showed him hours offootage featuring what he

(40:15):
considered cinema's greatestleading men.
Among them were Gary Cooper andSpencer Tracy.
It's noteworthy that Stevenschose these two actors.
In the 1920s, it was an opensecret in Hollywood that Gary
Cooper had a close relationshipwith actor Anderson Lawler.
Similarly, those who knewSpencer Tracy often spoke of his

(40:37):
discreet hookups with men.
However, given the times,neither Cooper nor Tracy ever
spoke publicly about theserelationships.
Denials of homosexuality wereexpected back then and many who
knew them, including CatherineHepburn, staunchly defended
their privacy.
Hepburn, known for protectingthose close to her, once told

(40:59):
biographer Anne Edwards quote Idon't care what you write as
long as it's not the truth.
Despite the public denials,telegrams and letters reveal
affectionate language betweenGary Cooper and Anderson Lawler,
as well as a close relationshipbetween Spencer Tracy and
sportsman Timothy Durant.
These relationships werewell-known among Hollywood

(41:22):
insiders but remained hiddenfrom the public.
Stevens essentially wanted Rockto study two actors who,
despite their queer personallives, had crafted indelible
images of rugged masculinity onscreen.
Rock Hudson dedicated himself topreparing for his role in Giant
.
After immersing himself in hisstudies, he headed to Texas to

(41:45):
join the rest of the cast.
Right away, tension brewed whenhe met his co-star, the young
and rebellious James Dean.
Dean had recently made a namefor himself as a troubled youth
in Rebel Without a Cause and didnot get along with Rock.
He frequently stepped on Rock'slines, upstaged him in scenes

(42:05):
and pulled focus away Off-camera.
Dean's attitude was even morecontentious.
He was standoffish and openlyhostile towards Rock.
According to those who knew him, james Dean viewed Rock as a
hypocrite for playing roles sodifferent from his real-life
persona.
Dean, a student of methodacting, believed performances

(42:27):
should be rooted in genuinepersonal experiences.
This approach was evident inRebel Without a Cause, where
Dean had instructed his co-star,bisexual actor Sal Mineo, to
play his character as if he werein love with Dean's character.
Rock, however, preferred tomaintain a clear distinction
between himself and hischaracters.

(42:49):
As tensions on set escalated,rock sought an escape from the
hostility.
He found solace in hisfriendship with another
legendary co-star, elizabethTaylor.
Taylor, who had been actingsince childhood, was similarly
trained to project a specificpublic image.
Like Rock, she had been coachedto embody the perfect persona,

(43:11):
her graceful and poisedfemininity mirroring Rock's
rugged and coarse masculinity.
The relief they found in eachother's company was
indescribable, a friendship thatbecame intensely important
towards the end of Rock's life.
Away from the prying eyes ofHollywood, they let their guards
down and simply had fun.
They made each other laughduring takes and went out

(43:33):
drinking together.
During a hailstorm they evenran around gathering chunks of
ice for their drinks, resultingin bruises from the hailstones.
One memorable night theyinvented a chocolate martini,
indulging so much that they weresick during their scenes.
The next day, their camaraderieand visible enjoyment led to

(43:53):
suspicions.
Back in Los Angeles, taylor'shusband, producer Michael Todd,
became convinced she was havingan affair with Rock.
Similarly, rock's wife Phyllisgrew concerned.
Both Phyllis and Todd traveledto the set to check on their
spouses.
What they found, however, wasno evidence of an affair.

(44:14):
Instead, they discovered twoactors who, under the relentless
pressure to maintain theirpublic images, had finally found
a space to breathe and bethemselves, far from Hollywood's
scrutiny.
Rock Hudson and ElizabethTaylor's on-screen chemistry in
Giant was stunning.
Even in the most serious scenesthey formed a compelling and

(44:35):
loving couple.
When the film premiered inNovember 1956, it was an
immediate hit, earning numerousOscar nominations, including one
for Rock.
Thrilled by the recognition,rock hoped this success would
lead to more interesting andcomplex roles, portraying flawed
men struggling with theirmasculinity and vulnerability.

(44:56):
However, the roles thatfollowed were disappointingly
one-dimensional Simple,pure-hearted war hero, a noble
reporter, a selfless soldier.
Despite his aspirations fornuance and depth, directors
continued to cast Rock inuncomplicated roles, essentially
reducing him to a handsomefigure.

(45:17):
Even after the success of Giant, he remained quote good scenery
, just as he had been in hisfirst film.
The image of the perfect man hadbeen so meticulously crafted
for Rock that he found itimpossible to break free from it
.
Been so meticulously craftedfor Rock that he found it
impossible to break free from it.
Rock's best chance at a morecomplicated role came in the

(45:40):
adaptation of William Faulkner'sthe Tarnished Angels.
The character was a complex,disreputable man, a stark
contrast to the clean-cut rolesRock was known for.
To prepare, rock bought ashabby suit and used shoes to
look genuinely down on his luck.
But when studio executives sawhim, they were furious.
Quote you can't play the partlike that.

(46:00):
You're a star.
You have to be well-dressed,they insisted.
In their eyes, rock could onlyappear in polished, clean-cut
roles, regardless of thecharacter's true nature,
polished, clean-cut rolesregardless of the character's
true nature.
With each film, it becameincreasingly clear that Rock's

(46:21):
desires and ambitions didn'tmatter to the people around him.
What mattered was maintaininghis image as the perfect man,
both on the screen and off.
The pressure to maintain hispublic image took a heavy toll
on both Rock Hudson and, byextension, his wife Phyllis.
Since their marriage, rock hadbeen working non-stop, filming,
traveling and promoting hismovies.

(46:41):
Phyllis started to feelincreasingly left out and
neglected.
When she visited him on set, heignored her, and when he was
home, his mind seemed elsewhere.
He ignored her, and when he washome, his mind seemed elsewhere
.
In truth, rock was wildlyfrustrated by his inability to
pursue relationships with othermen.
Both Rock and Phyllis wereunder immense pressure and

(47:03):
deeply unhappy, leading tofrequent conflicts.
The breaking point came during apress tour in Italy organized
by Universal Studios.
In her memoir, phyllisrecounted an incident while they
were walking through Rome, theyheard someone calling Rock's
name and turned to see ahandsome Italian man approaching
them.

(47:23):
Rock explained that he had metthe man years earlier while
filming a war movie in Italy.
As Phyllis watched the two mencatch up and make plans to meet
the next day it was clear to herthat this was more than a
casual reunion.
She was watching the planningof a potential hookup right in
front of her, even if shecouldn't immediately recognize

(47:43):
her husband's interest in it.
After the Italian man left,rock and Phyllis got into a
bitter argument.
In her frustration, phyllisused a homophobic slur to
describe the man, and Rockresponded by slapping her.
This moment marked a turningpoint in their already strained
relationship.

(48:04):
Despite attempts to reconcile,the trust between Rock and
Phyllis was irreparably damaged.
Rock spent even less time athome and began seeing other men.
Phyllis, fed up with thesituation, confronted Rock about
his sexuality and hired aprivate investigator to plant a
secret tape recorder in theirhouse.
The recording captured aheart-wrenching conversation in

(48:27):
which Phyllis asked Rock toconfirm that he was gay.
Rock broke down in tears andPhyllis told him he was
destroying his career.
Rock pleaded that it wasn'tsomething he could change and
expressed his fear of losing her.
They eventually changed thesubject, but by then Phyllis was
already planning their divorce.
Many have hunted for therecording, including myself, but

(48:51):
it seems someone has scrubbedits existence from the internet.
Sensing the impending end oftheir marriage, rock eventually
walked out, leaving a note,saying that it was time to part
ways.
The divorce proceedings wereswift and after just three years
their marriage was over.
The breakup was hard on both ofthem and divided their friends,

(49:12):
many of whom felt compelled totake sides.
Mark and George, the couple whohad always supported Rock, were
particularly furious about howhe had treated Phyllis and
stopped talking to him for ayear.
With his marriage to Phyllisover, rock Hudson needed to
revamp his public image.
An opportunity arose in 1959,thanks to producer Ross Hunter,

(49:36):
who had given Rock his firststarring role in romantic films.
Hunter was now working withDoris Day, a singer with a
wholesome, clean-cut image, andwanted to cast her in something
more daring a sexy romanticcomedy with Rock Hudson as the
leading man.
When Hunter approached Rockabout starring in a rom-com with
Rock Hudson as the leading man,when Hunter approached Rock

(49:59):
about starring in a rom-com,rock was skeptical.
He had only ever done seriousmelodramas.
But Hunter insisted that Rock'sserious approach to a funny
role could make it even morehilarious.
Convinced, rock agreed and theybegan working on a film called
Pillow Talk.
In Pillow Talk, rock Hudsonplays a character who, despite
despising his neighbor played byDoris Day, has only interacted

(50:20):
with her over the phone.
When he accidentally meets herin person at a nightclub, he
recognizes her and decides todeceive her by posing as a shy
southern gentleman with theintention of making her fall in
love with him.
Her by posing as a shy southerngentleman with the intention of
making her fall in love withhim.
However, the plan backfires ashe unexpectedly falls for her,

(50:40):
leading to a series of comedicand romantic complications.
The plotline mirrors elementsof Hudson's own life.
The film even featured asequence where Hudson's
character pretends to be gay, abold move considering the era's
social climate.
The innuendo in this scene wasdaring for the time and pushed
the boundaries of what wasacceptable under the production
code administration, whicheventually intervened to soften

(51:03):
the implications.
Given the ongoing rumors aboutHudson's sexuality, this plot
point added a layer of irony andtension to the film.
Despite these challenges, themovie ends with Hudson's
character revealing that hissupposed homosexuality was
merely a ruse, ensuring that thefilm concluded with traditional
heterosexual pairings.

(51:25):
Audiences were charmed byHudson's comedic performance and
Pillow Talk became asignificant success.
This led Universal Studios toquickly produce more romantic
comedies featuring Hudson, manyof which included subtle
references to queer subtexts.
For instance, in Lover ComeBack, hudson's character once
again adopts a false identity,while in Strange Bedfellows his

(51:49):
character is pressured to changehis lifestyle, a clear nod to
societal expectations.
In this film, hudson'scharacter even shares a bed with
another man, a scenario thatfurther teased the audience with
its underlying implications.
Another film, a Very SpecialFavor, includes a line from
Hudson's character's, subtlyreferring to the actor's hidden

(52:12):
struggles.
Quote hiding in closets isn'tgoing to cure you.
Despite the frequent gayinnuendo, the films always
affirmed Rock's character'sheterosexuality by the end.
These romantic comedies provedincredibly successful and became
the roles Rock is perhaps bestremembered for.
However, despite their success,rock started to grow weary of

(52:36):
these type of roles too.
By the 1960s, rock Hudson wasgrowing increasingly tired of
his longtime agent, henry Wilson.
Despite sticking with Henryover the years, rock had always
resented him for pushing himinto a marriage with Phyllis and
for taking credit for all hissuccess.
Adding to his frustration wasthe fact that Henry had advised

(52:57):
him to pass on roles he reallywanted, like the lead in Ben-Hur
, which ultimately went toCharlton Heston and won him an
Oscar.
Henry, however, remainedunfazed by Rock's
dissatisfaction.
He believed Rock needed him anddidn't have the nerve to fire
him.
But Henry wasn't counting onone significant change.

(53:17):
In 1964, rock met Tom Clark, apress agent who worked at MGM.
There was an instant attractionand they began dating secretly
as part of Hollywood's PRmachine.
Tom was well aware of Henry'ssleazy reputation and started
urging Rock to get rid of him.
Rock resisted at first, butthings began to change when

(53:41):
Henry picked up a new clientnamed Dick Scholler.
Henry became totally obsessedwith him, renaming him Chance
Gentry and showering him withattention.
This left Rock feelingneglected and increasingly
jealous.
Eventually he reached hisbreaking point, with Tom by his
side.
Rock called Henry to end theirprofessional relationship,

(54:04):
trying to let him down easy,emphasizing that it was just
business.
Henry didn't take it well.
He screamed at Rock, claiminghe had no talent and threatening
to expose all of Rock's secrets.
In a particularly dramaticmoment, henry even claimed he
had a jar of acid he would throwat Rock's face.
It was a rough breakup,possibly the roughest of Rock's

(54:27):
life.
After leaving Henry, rock wentthrough a series of agents, but
none were as skilled atselecting roles for him.
This led to a string of flopsfrom the mid-1960s into the
early 1970s, includinglow-budget war films, a soggy
heist movie and a jaw-droppingsex comedy called Pretty Maids

(54:48):
All in a Row.
Initially promising, prettyMaids All in a Row was written
by Star Trek's Gene Roddenberryand boasted an all-star cast.
Originally, football player JoeNamath was set to play the main
villain, a sex-addicted highschool coach who kills the
students.
After he dropped out, theproducer's wife suggested Rock.

(55:09):
After seeing him swimming, rock, with his handsome looks and a
new mustache, took the role.
However, audiences were notready to see their romantic hero
play an outright villain.
The film, further compromisedby MGM's cuts to avoid an X
rating, was panned by critics.
Roger Ebert called itembarrassing.

(55:31):
As his movie career spiraled,rock turned to other media.
He starred in a made-for-TVmovie called Once Upon a Dead
man, playing a San Francisco copwho solves crimes with his wife
.
The film did well enough thatNBC turned it into a series,
macmillan and Wife, and for thenext few years the show filled
NBC's schedule between episodesof Columbo.

(55:53):
It paid well, but Rock foundthe fast-paced filming
frustrating feeling.
It didn't allow him to do hisbest work.
He also ventured into music,teaming up with
singer-songwriter Rod McCoon,who had a huge crush on him.
They recorded songs for analbum called Rock.
Gently Rod claimed Rock had thebest singing voice he'd ever

(56:16):
heard, though that might havebeen the crush talking.
Beautiful people are oftentreated differently from those
who are moderately pleasantlooking, and Rock Hudson was no
exception.
At the start of his career hewas told to make his voice lower
by getting sick and screamingfor hours, a technique that
ruined his ability to sing.
When Rock played his album RockGently for friends, they

(56:40):
struggled to find anything niceto say.
The album sales were disastrous.
Rock ended up buying manycopies himself to avoid the
embarrassment of them gatheringdust in record stores himself.
To avoid the embarrassment ofthem gathering dust in record
stores, he cancelled plans for afollow-up album Rock for the
Fun of it, while reputation wasentering a nosedive.
Just a few years earlier, theTheatre Owners of America had

(57:04):
named him Actor of the Year, hehad received a star on the Walk
of Fame and a film industrytrade group had ranked him as
the number one box office drawfor seven consecutive years.
But by the mid-1960s Rock'sranking dropped to number two,
then to number ten, and by 1970,he was off the list completely.

(57:25):
As if things couldn't get anyworse, another setback came
along.
It started as a joke among agroup of men in Long Beach.
They threw a party and sent outinvitations jokingly announcing
the marriage of Rock Hudson andanother closeted actor, jim
Neighbors.
There was no truth in the joke.
Rock and Jim were friends andtheir playful interactions could

(57:48):
be seen on episodes of theCarol Burnett Show, but they
were never romantic.
Rock's housekeeper quipped atthe time.
Quote Somehow the jokeinvitations reached someone who
believed they were real andrumors had started to spread.
Radio DJs joked about it, gossipcolumnists fueled speculation

(58:11):
and Mad Magazine even postedaoked about it.
Gossip columnists fueledspeculation and Mad Magazine
even posted a comic about it.
At first, rock and Jim tried toignore the rumors, a strategy
that had worked in the past.
But Rock no longer had aruthless agent like Henry Wilson
to quash the rumors and thestory refused to die down.
Rock was even heckled at amovie premiere, with onlookers
shouting slurs at him.

(58:32):
To finally put the rumors torest, rock and Jim gave separate
interviews denying theallegations.
They asserted they were neitherin a relationship nor gay.
While this helped quiet thingsdown, the damage was already
done.
Jim's variety show was quietlycancelled and Rock's reputation
took a significant hit.

(58:54):
By the late 1970s, manyproducers saw Rock Hudson as a
liability.
They feared that casting him asa romantic lead would invite
ridicule from audiences.
As a result, the roles he wasoffered became increasingly
unappealing.
One such role came fromdirector Roger Corman, who

(59:16):
approached Rock about starringin a disaster movie called
Avalanche.
Believing that disaster movieswould be popular in the 70s,
rock agreed.
However, while disaster moviesmight have been a trend, this
particular movie was not Knownfor his low-budget, schlocky
films.
Corman's Avalanche turned outto be nearly unwatchable.
Rock's friends could see he wasstruggling and they stepped in

(59:38):
to help.
Mark and George, the couple whohad taken him under their wing
when he first moved to LA,helped him manage his business
affairs, something he had alwaysfound challenging.
Another lifeline came fromCarol Burnett, who had become
friendly with Rock after hisappearances on her show In the
1970s.
Carol invited Rock to join herin a touring production of the

(59:59):
romantic comedy musical I Do, IDo.
Despite having littleexperience with live theater,
rock decided to give it a try.
As they toured, rock had ablast.
He and Carol would clown aroundon stage making each other
laugh.
Rock enjoyed the experience somuch that he signed on for

(01:00:20):
additional tours the followingsummer.
It was during one of thesetheatrical tours that he made an
intriguing new friend, aconnection that would prove
significant in his later years.
During a tour stop in SanFrancisco, rock Hudson met a
young writer named ArmisteadMaupin.
Armistead was just beginningwork on a serialized story about

(01:00:42):
life in San Francisco, set tobe published under the title
Tales of the City.
Being a bit younger, armisteadhad grown up idolizing Rock as a
screen icon and sex symbol.
In fact, he had often mentionedRock in the first chapter of
his story, flattered Rockinvited Armistead back to his
hotel for a party with friends.

(01:01:02):
At the party, after some drinks, rock hushed the crowd and did
a dramatic reading ofArmistead's story, much to the
writer's delight.
Armistead later recalled quoteI think he sort of expected it
to charm the pants off of me,and it more or less did.
This marked the beginning of aclose friendship.
Armistead introduced Rock to thevibrant gay culture of San

(01:01:24):
Francisco, taking him to theCastro gay bookstores, coffee
shops and nightclubs.
Rock had never seen suchopenness and was fascinated by
it.
Armistead shared with Rock thathe had recently come out to his
family, describing theexperience as a huge relief.
He encouraged Rock to do thesame, to break free from the

(01:01:45):
lies that had been constructedaround him by agents, studios
and gossip magazines.
Armistead felt part of a newgeneration that wanted to show
the world.
It didn't have to be that way.
The idea was tempting for Rock,especially after Armistead and
his friends took him to some ofSan Francisco's busier
bathhouses.
One friend recalled quote ofSan Francisco's busier

(01:02:06):
bathhouses.
One friend recalled quote wewatched Rock walk around and go
into a booth and you could hearthis scream oh my God, it's Rock
Hudson.
Wow, he's a big one, isn't he?
Seeing how liberating coming outhad been for Armistead and his
friends, rock began to want thatfreedom for himself.
However, wanting it andactually doing it were two

(01:02:27):
different things.
Rock had spent his entirecareer building a public persona
that mirrored the characters heplayed on screen.
He feared that if he discardedthat image there would be
nothing left.
He discussed it with hisboyfriend, tom, who was strongly
opposed to the idea.
Tom, who was Rock's partner atthe time, said quote not until

(01:02:48):
my mother dies.
Rock found this responsepuzzling, thinking if I was
sleeping with Rock Hudson, Iwould want my mother to know
immediately.
Ultimately, rock decided hecouldn't come out.
He believed it was feasible forthe younger generation, but for
someone of his age and statureit seemed impossible.
It was around this time thatRock received an invitation that

(01:03:17):
would change his life.
Years earlier, rock Hudson hadbeen friendly with his first
leading lady, jane Wyman, andher ex-husband Ronald Reagan,
along with his new wife, nancy.
When Reagan was electedpresident in 1890, he often
invited his old Hollywoodconnections to the White House.
In the early 80s, he and Nancyinvited Rock to a banquet, and
Rock happily attended.
However, nancy noticedsomething concerning.

(01:03:41):
She told Rock he lookedworryingly thin and when the
photos from the event werepublished, rock's close friends,
mark and George, noticed astrange mark on the back of his
neck.
They begged him to get itchecked out, but Rock, not
feeling worried, kept putting itoff.
Finally, they convinced him tosee a doctor and get some tests.

(01:04:05):
That's when Rock receiveddevastating news.
He tested positive for amysterious new illness.
Doctors didn't know much aboutit then.
It had only recently been namedAIDS.
What they did know was that ittended to affect gay men and had
no known cure.
When Rock asked how dangerousit was, his doctor took a long

(01:04:28):
pause before advising him to gethis affairs in order.
The diagnosis threw Rock into apanic.
In 1984, the social stigmaaround HIV was intense If word
got out, not only would itconfirm the rumors that he was
gay, but the association with adeadly disease would destroy
everything he had worked so hardto build.

(01:04:50):
He confided in a close innercircle, initially only telling
his friends Mark and George.
They were stunned but agreedthat, for Rock's safety, no one
else could know.
Mark and George immediatelybegan researching medical care.
Back then, treatments for HIVwere experimental and unproven.

(01:05:12):
They found a doctor in Francewho had some success with a drug
called HPA-23.
Reluctantly, rock agreed to go.
Mark and George booked theappointment and pushed him onto
a plane.
At the clinic in France, rockmet with Dr Dominique Dormand,
who explained the procedure.
Hpa-23 might prevent the virusfrom replicating.

(01:05:36):
It wasn't a cure, but it couldpotentially stop the spread.
The catch Rock would have toundergo regular treatments at
the clinic for the next fewmonths and avoid any strain,
meaning no acting roles for theforeseeable future.
This was a tough pill toswallow.
Acting was the center of Rock'sworld, his whole identity.

(01:05:58):
Complicating matters further,just as he arrived in France,
rock received a tempting offerfrom Aaron Spelling, the
producer of the TV hit series.
Dynasty Spelling wanted to adda touch of Golden Age Hollywood
class to the show and asked Rockto appear in several episodes
as a handsome manly loveinterest.

(01:06:18):
If audiences liked hischaracter, they planned to
create a whole new spin-offseries just for him.
To create a whole new spin-offseries just for him.
Rock faced an agonizing choiceStay in France for a treatment
that might prolong his life orreturn to Hollywood to take on a

(01:06:39):
role that might boost hiscareer.
Essentially, he had to choosebetween Rock the person and Rock
the product.
Initially he stalled theDynasty producers for a few days
as his treatment began, tellingthem he was thinking it over
and wasn't sure it was right forhim.
Back in LA, the Dynasty teamwas puzzled.

(01:06:59):
How could it not be right?
They had created the rolespecifically for him.
He'd played similar rolescountless times before.
After a week or two, dynastyco-creator Esther Sperino flew
to Paris to personally beg Rockto appear on the show.
They desperately wanted RockHudson.
No one else would do.
Rock asked for more time tothink it over, but at this point

(01:07:22):
about a month had passed sincehe started treatment and the
doctors had some good news Hisviral load was dropping.
The drug was working.
Believing he was cured, rockcut short the treatment and
booked a flight back to LA toshoot his episodes.
When Rock Hudson returned to theUnited States, his friends Mark

(01:07:42):
and George were deeplyconcerned.
They could see that he stillwasn't well.
He was tired, gaunt andforgetful.
They urged him to rest, notwork, warning that if he
appeared in front of cameras inhis current state everyone would
notice something was wrong.
But Rock felt he couldn't backout now.

(01:08:03):
In early 1985, he arrived onthe set of Dynasty ready to take
on his new role.
The storyline was reminiscent ofthe dramatic roles he had
played in the 1950s A stoic,strong, confident man,
successful and uncomplicated.
His character's romance withLinda Evans' character Crystal,

(01:08:27):
developing over several episodes, culminated in a kiss.
That kiss filled Rock withdread.
About a year earlier,scientists had determined that
casual conduct was unlikely tospread HIV, but the science was
still new.
There was no federal guidanceon how to avoid the risk of

(01:08:49):
transmission in such situations.
Rock did what he could to keepLinda safe.
Before the scene he scrubbedhis mouth with a disinfecting
agent and when the camerasrolled he kept his lips clamped
tight to avoid any exchange ofsaliva.
Linda Evans noticed thatsomething was off.
She didn't know what exactlywas going on with Rock, but she
had observed his extreme stressand exhaustion over the last few
days.
I knew he knew how to kisspassionately.

(01:09:12):
She later recalled, and that'swhy I was surprised.
He's a fine actor.
He knows what he's doing, so itwas confusing.
Despite her confusion, lindadidn't want to make a scene or
draw attention to Rock'scondition.
They finished the shot andmoved on.
As filming on Dynasty waswrapping up, rock Hudson

(01:09:32):
received a call from an oldfriend, doris Day.
Doris, who had starredalongside Rock in those beloved
romantic comedies of the 60s,was launching a new talk show
and wanted him to make anappearance Once again.
Mark and George tried todissuade him.
The dynasty shoot had beenexhausting and they feared
another appearance couldseriously harm his health and,

(01:09:54):
if he showed up looking unwell,damage his image.
But Rock couldn't be talked outof it.
He had genuine affection forDoris and felt he owed her a
favor.
I'll be there, you can count onme, he promised.
Rock's friends knew they couldalways count on him and he
wasn't about to let Doris down.

(01:10:15):
When Rock arrived to film thesegment it was clear to everyone
that he wasn't well.
In the weeks since filmingDynasty he had lost significant
weight and was physically weak.
You can see Doris supportinghim as they walk, but you can
also see the genuine joy onRock's face at reuniting with
his friend after so many years.
After the shoot, dorisexpressed her concern.

(01:10:37):
She thought Rock might havecancer or an infection from a
bad bout of the flu.
Rock tried to reassure her,reminiscing about the good old
days, but his strength wasfailing and he could barely stay
conscious.
He eventually apologized andclaimed he had another
engagement, but Doris knew itwasn't true.
She could tell he was on theverge of collapse.

(01:11:00):
Two days later, rock was on aplane back to Paris.
When Rock arrived, he wasseverely dehydrated and
struggling to breathe.
He made it to the Americanhospital, but the doctors there
were unaware of his HIV statusand thought he was having heart
problems.
To make matters worse, drDominique Dormand, who had been

(01:11:22):
treating him, didn't haveadmitting privileges at the
American hospital and wasn'tallowed to visit or treat Rock.
For Dr Dormant to take overRock's care, they needed to
transfer him to Percy MilitaryHospital, which was run by the
French military.
However, percy officials deniedthe request, citing a policy
against admitting Americans.

(01:11:45):
Mark and George, now terrifiedfor Rock's life, enlisted the
help of a publicist to send adesperate telegram to the only
people they could think of forhelp Ronald and Nancy Reagan.
They begged the Reagans tointercede with the President of
France to get permission for thetransfer.
White House records show thetelegram was received and a top

(01:12:07):
aide conferred with Nancy Reagan.
Her response, documented in a1985 White House memo, was
chilling.
She did not feel this wassomething the White House should
get involved in.
And that was it.
Rock was on his own.
Meanwhile things were gettingugly at the American hospital in
Paris.

(01:12:27):
Meanwhile things were gettingugly at the American hospital in
Paris.
Staffers had discovered Rock'sHIV status and were enraged, not
wanting their facilityassociated with AIDS.
They threatened that if Rock'speople didn't get him
transferred they would go to thepress with everything.
The Rock was gay, hadfull-blown AIDS and was near
death.
The press had already caughtwind that Rock was at the

(01:12:48):
hospital and the place wasswarming with reporters.
Rock's friends franticallytried to contain the rumors, but
speculation was rampant.

Speaker 3 (01:12:57):
Just what is wrong with Rock Hudson?
Tonight the 59-year-old actorremains in a Paris hospital
undergoing tests, but the natureof his illness has become
clouded in mystery and confusion.
Yesterday it was reported thatHudson had liver cancer and
possibly AIDS, but today thehospital denied the cancer story
and said nothing about the AIDSrumor.
A spokesman just said Hudsonwas tired.

Speaker 2 (01:13:18):
At this point, rock had a close circle of trusted
people looking after him.
His friend Mark had flown toParis to be by his side.
Rock's publicist was finally inthe loop and a French publicist
named Yannou Colliard, one ofRock's close personal friends,
was also present.
Realizing it was only a matterof time before the news leaked,

(01:13:39):
they decided to get ahead of itand make an announcement.
Yannou volunteered to write thestatement.
At 2 pm she stepped out of thehospital to face a swarm of
reporters.
The rest of the group watchedfrom Rock's bedside as she read
the statement.

Speaker 4 (01:13:55):
Actor Rock Hudson has AIDS acquired immune deficiency
syndrome.
The news of Hudson's illnesswas revealed in Paris Thursday.
Cnn's Don Lennox has more.
The confusion surrounding thecondition of Rock Hudson has, at
least in part, been explainedThursday in Paris, where Hudson
has been hospitalized at thePasteur Institute of the
American Hospital.
His press spokesman confirmedto reporters what had been

(01:14:18):
rumored that the 59-year-oldstar does have AIDS.
Mr Rock Hudson has acquiredimmune deficiency syndrome.
Colert said that Hudson hadknown about his illness for more
than a year after beingdiagnosed by doctors in
California.
It was those doctors who hadsuggested he go back to Paris.

Speaker 2 (01:14:40):
With this revelation, years of carefully constructed
myths about Rock Hudson, stageddates, planted news stories, a
sham marriage were torn down inan instant.
To Rock's surprise, theannouncement was met with an
outpouring of love.
Telegrams began pouring inimmediately.
His friend Elizabeth Taylorwrote that by coming forward,

(01:15:03):
rock would help destigmatize thevirus and save millions of
lives.
Messages of support came fromCarol Burnett, frank Sinatra,
tony Curtis, gregory Peck andeven Madonna, who told Rock that
he'd been her heartthrob sincechildhood and sent him all of
her love.
Rock was incredulous.

(01:15:24):
He told Mark, I don't even knowMadonna.
But it wasn't just celebrities.
The hospital was flooded withmessages from people around the
world.
They didn't know Rockpersonally, but they felt that
they knew him through his filmsand TV roles.
To his amazement, now that theysaw the real him, they stood by
him.
They stood by him.

(01:15:45):
The next day, rock felt wellenough to move and his friends
asked if he wanted to stay inthe hospital or return home.
Rock expressed his wish to diein his own bed.
As the weight of what washappening sank in, he
half-smiled and said What'll Ido?
For an encore, as Rock's friendswanted to get him home, a
controversy was brewing inHollywood the revelation of

(01:16:08):
Rock's HIV status caused concernin the industry, especially
about his on-screen kiss withLinda Evans in Dynasty.
Despite scientific evidencethat HIV couldn't be transmitted
through saliva, many beganpushing for new rules to prevent
HIV-positive actors fromworking.
But industry leaders pushedback.
Among them was Ed Asner, thepresident of the Screen Actors

(01:16:31):
Guild, and Linda Evans herself.
She publicly supported Rock andemphasized that her only
concern was for his well-being.
In the wake of the controversysurrounding Rock Hudson's HIV
diagnosis, many actors wanted toshow solidarity with their
friends affected by HIV.
In the years that followed,they found a powerful symbol to

(01:16:51):
do just that the red ribboncreated by the Visual AIDS
Artist Caucus in New York.
Watching footage of award shows, especially in the 90s, you'll
see almost everyone wearing ared ribbon on their lapel.
This ribbon signaled theirsupport for colleagues with HIV
and their stand againstdiscrimination.
But this symbol of solidaritywas still years away.

(01:17:16):
With Rock's health failing, theimmediate concern was getting
him home.
They reached out to variousairlines, but the response was
disheartening.
We don't take AIDS people onboard Undeterred.
They rented a private jet tofly him back to the US.
As soon as he was home, hisfriends began to vigil by his
side.
Many of his friends visited,including Elizabeth Taylor, who

(01:17:40):
snuck into the hospital via theloading dock to avoid the press.
When she saw Rock, she pulledback the covers, climbed into
bed and held him in her arms.
This was a time when manypeople, even healthcare workers,
were afraid to touch those withHIV.
About a month after returninghome, rock's health began to

(01:18:00):
decline rapidly, summoning hisfriends.
He told them that he haddecided to authorize a memoir, a
tell-all book that wouldfinally share the honest story
of his life.
He wanted the proceeds from thebook to go towards programs
supporting the treatment andprevention of HIV.
He found a writer named SarahDavidson, whom he trusted to

(01:18:21):
tell his story and urged hisfriends to be completely open
with her.
Holding nothing back, hisfriends promised to honor his
wishes.
Early in the morning of October2nd 1985, rock Hudson passed
away in his sleep.
The news of his death was metwith an outpouring of grief and

(01:18:43):
sympathy At the gates of hishome.
Friends emerged to inform themedia that Rock was gone.
The memoir Rock authorized,published in 1986, raised a
significant amount of money forHIV research and support.
But beyond its financialsuccess, the book galvanized

(01:19:07):
numerous other HIV fundraisers.
The knowledge that thisbeautiful, handsome man, beloved
by everyone, had faced such aharrowing disease changed public
perception.
Rock's physician remarked RockHudson was the single most
influential AIDS patient inhistory.
His diagnosis and subsequentpublic disclosure transformed

(01:19:29):
the way the disease wasperceived.
Millions of dollars startedpouring into various nonprofits
Just days after his death.
Congress allocated 221 milliondollars for medical research,
maintaining that funding overthe following years.
Recognizing the need for acoordinated effort to ensure

(01:19:49):
this money was used effectively,a coalition of groups founded
AMFAR, the American Foundationfor AIDS Research.
Amfar, the foundation, waslaunched with a $250,000
donation from the sales ofRock's memoir and was chaired by
his friend, elizabeth Taylor.

Speaker 5 (01:20:08):
I guess it's second nature really to turn away and
to ignore what is heartbreaking,what is unattractive, what's
not pretty.
We gravitate toward what's easyin life, and there's nothing
easy about AIDS exceptcontacting it.

Speaker 1 (01:20:32):
Ladies and gentlemen, for her bold support of gay and
lesbian community before theinvention of a gay movement and
her superhuman fight againstAIDS.
I'd like to present the GLAADVanguard Award to my stepmother,
elizabeth Taylor Hi.

Speaker 5 (01:20:53):
Thank you for inviting me here.
Can I come every night?
But to be serious, I did notbecome an activist to win awards
.
I became an activist to try toprotect people.
I could not sit silently byjust doing nothing.

(01:21:13):
I started my activism in the80s when a new disease emerged
that was quickly andinexplicably killing people.
So I got involved.
So I got involved All of mylife.
I've spent a lot of time withgay men Montgomery Clift, jimmy

(01:21:36):
Dean, rock Hudson who were mycolleagues, co-workers,
confidants, my closest friendsbut I never thought of them,
them of who they slept with.
They were just the people Iloved.
I could never understand whythey couldn't be afforded the

(01:21:58):
same rights and protections asall of the rest of us there.
There is no gay agenda.
It's a human agenda.
All of us should be treated thesame.
Those against gay marriages saymarriage should only be between

(01:22:22):
a man and a woman.
God, I, of all people, knowthat that doesn't always work.
Why shouldn't gay people beable to live as open and freely
as everybody else?
What it comes down toultimately is love.

(01:22:42):
How can anything bad come outof love?
The bad stuff is love.
How can anything bad come outof love?
The bad stuff comes out ofmistrust, misunderstanding and,

(01:23:12):
god knows, from hate.
During my life I've seen manythings, good and bad, but the
bad things never came out ofloving acts, loving gestures or
loving relationships.
That's why I'm here tonight tocelebrate you and your families.
Long live love.

Speaker 2 (01:23:39):
Since its inception, amphar has distributed thousands
of grants globally, supportingteams that developed rapid HIV
tests, drugs that make HIV amanageable condition,
educational programs on reducingrisk and even clinical trials
for an HIV vaccine.
As Elizabeth Taylor predicted,rock's impact was indeed saving

(01:24:02):
millions of lives.
Rock Hudson's announcementbrought hope to many who felt
hopeless.
He spent his life split betweentwo personas the personal,
private version, a gentle, shyman who preferred needlepoint to
sports and just wanted to beloved, and the public version,
an icon of rugged Americanmasculinity.

(01:24:23):
When the wall between thesepersonas suddenly came down, the
world saw the real man behindthe image.
Overwhelmingly, the responsewas supportive.
He inadvertently changed thecourse of history regarding AIDS
, becoming the first star tomake such a profound impact.
Arguably there hasn't been onesince who has matched his

(01:24:45):
influence.
Arguably there hasn't been onesince who has matched his
influence.
In my research into Rock's life,I discovered many fascinating
stories that I couldn't fit intothis script, from the intricate
details of his marriage to thesubtle, very gay subtext hiding
just below the surface of hisfilms.
There is just so much more touncover.
Rock Hudson's life was aconstant balancing act between

(01:25:06):
maintaining his public image andhiding his true self, the
relentless scrutiny and fear ofexposure added layers of
challenge, loneliness andunfulfillment to his already
complicated life.
Imagine achieving your dreamsbut never being able to live
them authentically or share themwith the world.

(01:25:26):
The applause and admirationfrom fans were hollow, masking a
deep yearning for genuine loveand acceptance as a queer person
.
Hudson's story resonates deeplywith me.
It's different from our usualfocus on specific films, but it
embodies the dark side ofHollywood, integral to this
podcast Stories that are hiddenfrom the public yet still affect

(01:25:47):
our relationships with thefilms or stars they affected.
Rock Hudson's story isn't justabout a Hollywood icon.
It's a lens through which wecan see the struggles of
countless individuals forced tolive behind a mask.
As we've journeyed through hislife, from his rise as the
epitome of American masculinityto his tragic decline under the

(01:26:08):
weight of a relentless disease,we're confronted with hard
truths about our society,because Rock's story isn't
unique.
It represents the mentaltorture we inflict on those who
don't fit into neat societalboxes.
This dichotomy of public andprivate persona is a powerful
reminder of the pain of livinginauthentically, a pain that we

(01:26:29):
still see today.
Rock Hudson's life compels us tore-examine our classic cinema
with a more critical eye.
These films, which have shapedour cultural landscape, were
built on the sacrifices ofactors like Rock, who endured
immense personal struggles toentertain us.
Understanding his strugglesdeepens our appreciation of

(01:26:50):
these films and the people whobrought them to life.
It's not just about feeling sadfor a life stifled by societal
expectations, but aboutrecognizing the immense strength
it took for Rock to maintainhis facade and the public impact
of his eventual vulnerability.
In sharing his story, we honorhis legacy not as a tragic

(01:27:11):
figure, but as a symbol ofresilience and courage.
His journey through a hostileindustry and society teaches us
the importance of authenticityand the devastating effects of
its absence.
Hudson's life and death sparkedconversations and actions since
that have saved millions oflives, showing us that even in
our darkest moments, we caninspire change.

(01:27:34):
This episode of CinematicSecrets aspires to peel back the
layers of Hollywood's glossyexterior to reveal the hidden
battles and silent sacrifices.
Rock Hudson's story forces usto confront our prejudices and
the systems that perpetuate them.
It's a call to action to createa world where no one has to

(01:27:54):
hide who they are.
So what do we take from hisstory?
It's a reminder to be kinder,to challenge societal norms and
to support those who bravelylive their truth.
His life and legacy teach usthat true strength lies in
vulnerability and that the fightfor acceptance is far from over

(01:28:15):
.
We can honor Rock's legacy byadvocating for a world where
everyone can live authentically.
Rock Hudson once said I havelearned that life is not a
straight line, but a circle.
We all come back to where westarted.
Thank you.

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CINEMATIC SECRETS | Closeted Shadows: The Torment of Rock Hudson

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}CINEMATIC SECRETS | Closeted Shadows: The Torment of Rock Hudson