May 21, 2025 • 88 mins
“You can’t mindset your way out of survival.”
If you’ve been stuck in overthinking, people-pleasing, emotional shutdown, or constantly feeling like you're on edge, this message is for you.
This episode is a replay from a live I did on Facebook and Instagram, and I knew I had to bring it here, because too many of us are still asking:
Why do I still feel stuck when I’ve tried everything?
Why can’t I stop caring what others think?
Why do I keep shutting down when it’s time to take action?
You’ll hear why your mind, body, and spirit are still responding like they’re in survival mode even when you’re ready for more.
You’re not lazy. You’re not broken. And you are absolutely not unworthy.
You’ve just built protective patterns that once helped you make it through, but now, they’re keeping you from the life you were meant to live.
In this episode, I show you how to break free from what’s been holding you back with real talk, practical insight, and a fresh way to look at the patterns that have been keeping you stuck. You’ll learn how to shift out of survival patterns like overthinking, people-pleasing, fear of judgment, emotional shutdown, and constant second-guessing.
You’ll learn why traditional advice like “just be positive” hasn’t worked—and how to move beyond that with my O.D.E. Method:
💥 Overcome the real barriers that keep you stuck
🔍 Discover your true identity and calling
🚀 Elevate your life with confidence, clarity, and purpose
Plus, I’m giving you a gift to help you take the very first step toward unlocking the life you were meant for. So be sure to listen all the way through.
This isn’t about just “thinking positive” or “setting boundaries” without understanding what’s really going on underneath. This is about real, lasting change that aligns with who you really are.
So grab a notebook or just let this play in the background while you’re driving, cleaning, or walking...just don’t miss it.
Because you’re not meant to stay stuck. You’re meant to rise.
Let’s take the first step together.
And yes, there’s a gift for you at the end to help you take that first powerful step toward the life you know you're meant to live.
✨ Let’s stop surviving and start leading your life from a place of wholeness, alignment, and authority.
🔗 Learn more or connect: krystaljae.com
🎁 Grab your free gift here: krystaljae.com/sneakpeek
📲 Follow me on Instagram: @the_empowerment_goddess
🎙️ Listen on the podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/who-am-i-with-krystal-jae-elevate-my-life-overcome/id1770153394
#FeelingStuck #BreakFree #PersonalGrowth #SelfDiscovery #Overthinking #PeoplePleaser #ConfidenceCoach #LiveWithPurpose #KrystalJae #Confessionsofahealedwoman #womanconfessions #healedconfessions #confessionsession #ODEMethod #ElevateYourLife #outofstuckness
“You are not alone, and you are enough. When times get tough, pray, listen and follow through. God loves you and trust me when I say he is not your trauma.” ~Krystal Jae
“Believe in all that you are and know that you have this inner power that is greater than any obstacle.” ~Krystal Jae
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
You can't mindset your way out of survival.
If you've been stuck inoverthinking, people-pleasing,
emotional shutdown andconstantly feeling like you're
on the edge, this message is foryou.
This episode is a replay from alive I did on Facebook and
(00:24):
Instagram, and I knew I had tobring it here, because too many
of us are still asking why?
Why do I feel stuck when I'vetried everything, why can't I
stop caring about what othersthink and why do I keep shutting
(00:45):
down when it's time to takeaction?
You'll hear why your mind, bodyand spirit are still responding
like they're in survival, evenwhen you're ready for more.
You know, and I just want tolet you know, it's not because
you're lazy, it's not becauseyou're not broken or that you
(01:09):
are broken, and it's absolutelynot because you're not unworthy.
You see, you've just builtprotective patterns that once
helped you survive, but nowthey're keeping you from living
the life you're meant to live.
In this episode, I show you howto break free from what's
(01:35):
holding you back, with real talk, practical insight and a fresh
way to look at the patterns thathave been keeping you stuck.
You'll learn how to shift outof survival patterns like
overthinking, people pleasing,fear of judgment, emotional
shutdown and consistent secondguessing.
(01:57):
I'm walking you through my ODEmethod Overcome the barriers
keeping you stuck, discover whoyou truly are and what you're
here to do, and elevate yourlife with clarity, courage and
confidence.
Plus, as always, you know, I'mgiving you something right,
(02:20):
whether it's a tool or aworkbook or a skill or whatever,
but this is all of those.
So I'm giving you a gift tohelp you take the very first
step toward unlocking the lifeyou are meant for.
So be sure to listen all theway through.
(02:43):
This isn't about just thinkingpositive or just setting
boundaries without understandingwhat's really going on
underneath.
This is about real, lastingchange, a true transformation
that aligns with who you trulyare.
(03:04):
Who are you authentically?
So grab a notebook or just letthis play in the background
while you're driving, cleaningor walking.
Just don't miss it, becauseyou're not meant to stay stuck.
You're meant to rise.
So let's take this first steptogether.
(03:34):
What's really keeping you stuckand how to unlock the life that
you were meant for?
Right Y'all?
I've been talking about thiscoming up for like the past two
weeks now, even though it kindof went ghost for a little bit
because I was sick and notfeeling too well, but it's all
(03:54):
good right.
Oh no, we need to center that.
Okay, so here we go.
Okay, so here we go.
(04:17):
So one of the reasons why Ipicked this topic was really
keeping you stuck and how tounlock the life that you were
meant for is because for a verylong time, I lived in a space to
where I was stuck and I didn'trealize I didn't always realize
that I was stuck.
I thought it was just how lifeis right, and it wasn't until I
(04:37):
started actually beginning mytrue healing journey, my
empowered healing journey, myempowered journey to wholeness,
that I realized that I was stuckfor a very long time.
Like I felt like yeah, ofcourse, like you know, there was
times to where I was like, ok,like I'm tired, things aren't
(05:00):
going where it's going.
I was present, but reallywasn't present.
But I didn't realize that itwas considered me being stuck.
I just like, again, it was life.
So when?
So there was oftentimes that Iwoke up just really exhausted,
(05:26):
exhausted with life, not fromlack of sleep, okay, but because
my soul, my spirit was tired.
I was showing up for everyonebut me.
I was always smiling, I servedand I strived for greatness, but
secretly I wondered why do Istill feel like this?
(05:51):
And what this was was confusion, loneliness, the need to please
in order to be accepted.
Really, I was a nice, am Awoman of faith, purpose and
(06:14):
intelligence, but I was stuck inpatterns.
I couldn't see I was living insurvival, but calling it
strength.
Have you ever been like, holdon, let me, okay, like life is
life right now.
Let me put my big girl jaws on,cause that's what I used to be
(06:35):
like.
Okay, it's time for me to goahead and put my big girl jaws
on and let me do this.
Let me take care of thissituation.
Let me go and do some things,make this happen.
But again, it was that I wasliving in survival, but calling
(06:58):
it strength.
So, you see, tonight is notjust about information, it's
about transformation.
And if you've been trapped inoverthinking and people pleasing
(07:19):
and emotional shutdown orperfectionism, okay, I want you
to know that you are not broken.
You are wired for survival andthat wiring can be gently and
powerfully rewritten.
Tonight we will be enhancingyour journey with the
(07:41):
transformation of empoweredtransformational healing, and
you may be like, what's thatwe're going to get into that?
Okay, but first I want to sharenow I know Because, you see, I
know what it means to suffer insilence, to smile while drowning
(08:06):
, to be betrayed by those whoclaim to love me, to be lost,
confused and broken in places noone could see.
I know the weight of traumaemotional, physical, sexual,
medical, psychological all aburden so invisible yet so
(08:28):
unbearably real.
I know what it means to givelove and not have it returned,
to witness abuse and feelpowerless, to stretch myself
thin just to belong and still beleft out in the cold.
I know the ache of friendshipsfading, with no answers, just
(08:54):
echoes of silence.
I know the fear of being seen,the kind that stops dreams from
being born.
I've swallowed my voice to makeothers feel comfortable.
(09:16):
I've chosen them over me, overme.
I know what it is to have liferipped from my womb, to cry out
for help and be met with silenceor, worse, to be saved by
(09:39):
strangers when those I callfriend looked away.
I know what it is to be sick,alone, desperate and still
expected to survive.
I know the sting of my ownmistakes, the guilt that lingers
(10:12):
like shadows, the shame of notbeing my best self.
I know what it is.
I know what it is to livedeeply, to love deeply, to want
deeply, to crave deeply and nothave it in return.
(10:33):
I know what it feels like to betold I am nothing, a burden too
much and never enough.
I know what it feels like to bebranded as a failure, to be
made to believe that my lifewould amount to nothing.
(10:56):
But I also know this I knowthat God is within me and I will
not fail, because those lies,they were never mine to carry.
I know the pain of lies, thekind that can tear your world
(11:18):
apart.
I know the cost of smilingwhile screaming inside and
wondering if there was anybodyto help me.
I've asked God to rescue me andwondered if he heard me.
I've fought unseen battles,spirits heavy on my chest,
(11:43):
darkness sucking out my light.
I've curled into corners,clutching the last pieces of
myself, weeping until there wereno tears left.
But still I rise, because Iknow what it is to be saved by
(12:10):
God, to be handed purpose when Ithought I had none.
I know the unshakable power offaith, the kind that rebuilds
what the world tried to destroy.
I know that no weapon formedagainst me shall prosper.
(12:33):
I know who I am now.
I know the freedom that comesfrom living as my authentic self
, the peace that flows fromhealing.
I am no longer broken to zero.
(12:53):
I rise each day equipped withtools, anchored in truth,
walking in power.
I know that healing is holy,that transformation is real,
like a caterpillar becoming whatit was always destined to be.
(13:17):
I know the power of choosingmyself, self-care, self-love,
self-worth, self-confidence.
I know what it feels like tolive in divine purpose.
I know that.
(13:37):
I know now and now that I know,I teach, I empower, I lead.
I'm a certified in somatic,trauma-informed care, law of
attraction, meditation,therapeutic art for life
(13:58):
coaching.
I use the wisdom from my woundsto help others rise.
I am the guide that I onceneeded, the voice I long to hear
, the light I prayed for in thedark, and now I help others
(14:18):
overcome, discover, elevate,elevate, because healing isn't
the end, it's the beginning ofbecoming who we were always
meant to be through ourempowered, transformational
healing journey.
Now I am Crystal J, so welcome,and hey, hey, it's been a
(14:45):
minute and I'm glad that you arewith me.
So what I ask for this time thatwe are together tonight is that
you show up unapologeticallyfor you, because you deserve
this and, like I said in thebeginning, you're busy putting
(15:06):
the kids to bed, or you're busywashing the dishes after dinner
or getting ready for bed orwhatever.
You need to put your earbuds in.
Okay, because I've been there.
I'd be multitasking too, butthis is knowledge for you,
(15:43):
because you wouldn't belistening to me right now if you
didn't feel that what's reallykeeping you stuck and how to
unlock the life you were meantfor.
So feel free to comment as I go.
I will try my best to keep upwith the comments and we'll see.
Sometimes I answer them duringthe live.
Sometimes I go back and I'll DMyou and answer your questions.
(16:04):
A lot of time I get people whoDM me and I answer in the DMs
Okay, if I see it, I answer it.
If my VA see it, she lets meknow.
So that way I can go back and Ican answer Okay.
So we cool.
So just for a couple of moments, just for a brief moment, okay,
(16:27):
before we just dive in, okay,because we just yeah, let's just
take a few deep breaths, okay,so breathe in and out.
(16:52):
I don't know about y'all, but mynerves and stress and stuff be
up in my neck and my shouldersand I be having to relax that,
especially if you get nerves andanything, it's always my neck
and shoulders for the most part,so I'll be having to, like,
release that, or even in myelbow, y'all, like it's usually
this elbow.
But anyway, did y'all do y'allyou know, take a couple of deep
(17:16):
breaths, a couple of neck rollsso we can begin, okay, so, as I
was preparing for tonight, Ishared some thoughts on on my
Facebook and my Instagram thatreally, that I knew would really
resonate with so many of us,and I want to take a moment to
(17:38):
reflect on them.
I don't want to ignore them,because I did it intentionally.
Okay, because they highlightexactly the struggles that we're
talking about here tonight.
Okay, so, post one the thing wasmostly about being who everyone
else needed me to be, stole meand y'all.
(18:02):
These are really things that,like, I've literally recognized
in my own journey and that someof my past clients have
recognized in their journey, andso I want to know have you ever
felt like you were living foreveryone else but yourself, like
you were so busy being thestrong one, the responsible one,
(18:24):
the peacemaker, that somewherealong the way, you lost yourself
?
Because this post was, thispost was like when I was
thinking about it okay, becauseit's a truth, and it's one that
(18:45):
we don't always admit.
We've been carrying identitiesthat were never ours to begin
with, and it leaves us feelingexhausted, unseen and stuck, and
tonight we're going to talkabout how to start coming home
to yourself.
Okay, post two today wasminimizing myself became my
(19:12):
survival.
Again, minimizing myself becamemy survival.
See, this post is for those ofyou who learned to shrink
themselves to survive.
I've been there.
Maybe you silenced your spiritto keep the peace or questioned
(19:37):
yourself because trusting othersgot you hurt, but here's the
truth.
Here's the truth.
Here's the truth.
Your spirit wasn't made to bemuted and your voice was never
the problem.
Tonight, we'll talk about howto reclaim your voice and step
(20:07):
into your fullness without fear.
Okay, post three.
Post three I've seen that I'llanswer you in a minute.
(20:36):
Actually, I'm gonna DM you.
Okay, post three I lost atbeing me all for the sake of
love.
Now, this one hit deep becausethere's a specific kind of grief
that comes from abandoningyourself for love, whether it's
(21:00):
romantic, family or evenfriendships.
We settle, we shrink, we betrayourselves just to feel safe or
chosen.
But what if healing doesn'trequire you to earn love?
(21:21):
By disappointing, bydisappearing Is what I'm trying
to say, yeah.
So what if healing doesn'trequire you to earn love by
disappearing or feel like you'redisappointing others?
Tonight we're going to explorethat as well how to break free
(21:53):
from the chains of conditionallove and rediscover the real you
.
Pulse four was dead-end jobs,dead-end relationships, and
still I stayed.
Now, for those of us who stayedin places we knew we weren't
aligned with, whether it's jobs,relationships or even just the
(22:13):
patterns that we have been usedto, that we've accepted, because
fear made the decisions thatthis is where we're going to be.
We're just going to stay here.
We're not going to move forward.
(22:33):
I may not like it here, butit's somewhat comfortable
because I know what to expectRight.
Somewhat comfortable because Iknow what to expect right
Because sometimes we don't moveforward because we don't know
(22:55):
what is coming right.
You see, trauma has a way ofmaking us second guess
everything.
The things that we'veexperienced in life has a way to
make a second guess everything,even our own potential.
We stay in people pleasing fear, confusion and self-doubt, but
(23:25):
tonight we're going to talkabout how to break the cycle and
start trusting yourself tochoose better.
Now, post five, I dim my lightjust enough to be seen, but not
enough to shine.
This post speaks to the fear ofbeing unloved, not accepted,
(24:04):
not enough, not accepted, notenough.
It's the fear that keeps usplaying small, doing just enough
to get, to just get by, butnever enough for us to truly
shine.
But you weren't made to shrink,you were made to step into your
(24:29):
greatness.
And tonight let's talk abouthow to stop dimming your light
and start living boldly andauthentically.
You see, these stories and yes,I do know some of those posts
had like different phrases, butthey were made from these five,
(24:54):
just different words, okay.
But if you have one that youreally want to reach out to me
about, dm me, let's talk aboutit.
But these stories, thesestruggles, these situations,
these circumstances, they're notjust yours.
(25:15):
They're patterns.
We've been taught to survive,but they're not who we are.
And tonight I'm going to showyou why these patterns exist,
how they've been keeping youstuck and how we can begin
rewiring, rewriting themtogether.
So let's start by understandingwhat's really keeping you stuck.
(25:39):
So what if I told you you'renot the problem, your nervous
system is just doing its job.
So your brain, or our brain,right?
Our nervous system is wired toprotect us.
It's not wired to be like, oh,let us get all the pretty things
(26:04):
.
It's wired to protect us, okay.
And so when stress or difficultcircumstances or trauma hit, our
amygdala takes over Ourprefrontal cortex, our logic
(26:25):
shuts down, we enter the fight,flight, freeze right and this,
and you're probably like whatare you talking about?
Okay, it may look like, let'ssee you overthink everything,
every text, every conversation.
You know this is also why youfeel tense, even when everything
(26:52):
is fine.
This is why you can't relax,even when you're just trying to
rest.
Okay, and you didn't choosethese patterns.
Your body did.
And it's not about what's wrongwith you.
(27:12):
It's not about happened to youand what your body believed it
had to do to protect you, okay,so if you've been struggling
(27:58):
with low self-esteem, self-doubt, abandonment, confusion, trust
issues, this isn't your fault.
These are survival patternsyour body had created to keep
you safe.
So why haven't I healed yet?
You know, is that what you'rewondering?
Oftentimes, and even sometimesI have to catch myself, and a
(28:19):
lot of times when people ask mefor questions, I'm like ooh,
it's not just a one sentenceanswer, right.
Because sometimes people arelike okay, you can tell me one
thing and it'll be good.
No, no, no, no, no.
It goes deeper, and that'swhat's the difference with what
(28:42):
I do.
We go deeper, okay, because,you see, mindset is part of the
journey, but it's not healing,it's not wholeness, it's part of
the journey, okay, so the justbe positive, or just set
(29:05):
boundaries, or just stop caringwhat people think.
You know why these don't work,those things don't work?
Because when the nervous systemis dysregulated all over the
place, when the nervous systemis dysregulated all over the
(29:32):
place, we can't mindset our wayout of survival and you must
feel your way back into safety.
Okay, so let me explain this.
Let me explain something, okay,so I know some of you that's
been with me, we talked, like Idid a whole thing, about the
traffic lights up in Tallinn.
Right, the red, green, yellow,just like the traffic lights
(29:55):
when we're driving down the road, or, if you don't drive, you're
in your Uber or in yourfriend's car or mama car,
whoever, and you're driving downthe road and we have the
stoplights All of us have seenthem, okay, and you have the red
light, you're stopped, you'restuck, you're frozen, you can't
go.
Okay, the yellow, we kind oflike, you know, we look around
(30:16):
and then we might go a littlebit.
You know we speed up whateveris cautious, basically Right.
So some people stop, somepeople speed us, some of us just
be cautious and go ahead and belike how much time we have,
whatever.
Okay, you get the point.
And green, of course, means goright.
It's safe for you to go, okay.
(30:38):
So an easy way to kind ofexplain this is this is an easy
way to kind of understand howour nervous system responds to
stress and why some patternsfeel so hard to break.
Okay, so our red light is ourventral vagal shutdown.
It's freeze.
Okay, this is when our systemfeels completely overwhelmed.
(31:00):
You might feel numb,disconnected, or like you're
just going through the emotions.
It's not just laziness, okay,it's not just laziness.
Okay, it's not just laziness,it's your body's way of shutting
down to protect you.
Okay, the yellow light right,it's like a sympathetic
(31:22):
overdrive.
Your fight or flight.
This is when you're in a highalert.
Maybe you're overthinking.
You're fight or flight.
This is when you're in a highalert.
Maybe you're overthinking.
You're feeling anxious.
You're like constantly on theedge and your body is ready to
go, it's ready to jump.
Am I going to fight?
Am I going to run.
What am I going to do?
Because I'm just ready to go,I'm just like hey, any moment.
(31:44):
But sometimes there's no realdanger, okay, and you're just
living in that, right.
Then we have the green light.
Right Before we even go to thegreen light, how can we function
and be like and be like justdon't worry or it'll be okay, or
(32:13):
just pray about it, or who arethe other ones?
Just set boundaries, just bepositive?
If we're living in those othertwo, the red or yellow, how are
we supposed to just be okay withjust that?
How is that supposed to calmyou down and really be like,
okay, yeah, you're right, okay,it's not going to happen.
(32:37):
But when we are in the greenlight the dorsal safety
connection okay, this is wherehealing, happiness, this is
where we are going on our way towholeness, right, this is where
we can truly function.
As our best self nervous systemhas been stuck in red or yellow
(33:12):
for too long, it can feelimpossible to get to that green,
to get to the safety, to get tothe connection, to get to the
calm, the peace, the clarityOkay, and when your nervous
system again is in that red oryellow, and when your nervous
(33:34):
system again is in that red oryellow, there's no amount of
positive thinking, boundarysetting that will stick.
It may be good for that moment,but it's not going to stick
because you don't feel safe.
So how can you fully openyourself up to receive it?
And this is why mindset aloneisn't enough.
You have to work with yournervous system to create safety
(33:55):
first.
Okay, and so that's where theEmpowered Transformational
(34:21):
Healing Framework and the ODEmethod comes in.
They're designed to help youmove out of survival mode and
into a state of safety, clarity,alignment, where true healing
and wholeness can happen.
So the ETH framework, orEmpowered Transformational
Healing, it's the journey thatyou are embracing, learning and
implementing with me, becausewith every core of my being, I
(34:44):
believe that empowerment is amust along our journey to
healing and wholeness.
And I'm saying this after, ohmy gosh years, decades it makes
me feel like I'm old, but I'mnot y'all but years of literally
going through traditionaltherapy.
Okay, and this was a light bulbmoment after I had a mental
(35:05):
breakdown and was really goingon this healing journey Not
knowing what I was looking for,but knowing that something had
to be better Because therapy wasjust getting me to my state of
okay, this is life, to my stateof okay, this is life, but it
(35:29):
wasn't getting me to the betterlife, the vision that I had for
myself, okay, the purpose that Iknew, that was instilled in me
and so empowered.
(35:51):
Transformational healing getsyou to wholeness.
It's what empowers us on thistransformational journey and I
discovered it on my journey fromfailure, confusion, silent
(36:13):
cries and unthinkable thoughts.
It empowered me to become myauthentic self and overcome the
barriers that were limiting mylife, helping me to discover my
authentic self, unlockinguntapped potential that I didn't
(36:34):
know, that I even had.
It was like hidden somewhereand I was like whoa, okay, like
I see you, okay, and that's howyou're going to be.
You're going to be like okay, Isee me, let me go, okay, and
that's how you're going to be.
You're going to be like okay, Isee me, let me go, okay, and so
you're going to and this isgoing to like it truly like
elevated my life completely Okay, Because, back in the day,
(37:01):
there's no way I will be sittinghere on a live, there's no way
that I would be like sharing mystory would be like sharing my
story.
There's no way that I would bedoing any of this thing, because
, again, I am who I needed to beback when I was stuck, lost,
confused, broken, ashamed andjust didn't know what the heck
(37:27):
to do.
So that's why this is importantfor me, okay, and so this isn't
just about healing, it's abouttransforming into the person you
were always meant to be okay,you were always meant to be Okay
, and so I want you to imaginetrying to run a race with
(37:50):
weights tied to your anklesright?
You're not even working outwith the little ankle weights.
You're running a marathon rightnow, and your mindset tells you
just run harder.
Okay, well, my method helps youremove those weights and you
can finally run free.
(38:10):
Okay Now, the ODE methodOvercome, discover, elevate is
the heart of how I help womenand a few men like you move
beyond awareness into action andtransformation, making sure
that we are implementing.
(38:30):
Okay, because if we are aware ofsomething but we don't take
action and we don't implementthings, there's not going to be
a transformation.
Okay, so it's not just aframework, it's a journey, a
step-by-step process that workswith your body, mind and spirit
to create lasting change.
You've already taken the firststep by becoming aware that
(38:55):
something isn't working, butawareness alone isn't enough,
right, it's not enough.
And you're wondering, like dang, like, what is the next step?
What do I need to do?
I wish that someone could tellme the next step.
And I'm going to do it.
Right, have you said that?
Because that's where I was.
(39:17):
And I'm tell you another secretEvery level that we get to
where I was, like, okay, what'sthe next step?
And so, like me, as a coach Ihave a coach.
Okay, like we're all.
I'm not going to tell y'all todo something I'm not doing
myself, Okay, so overcome.
(39:47):
Okay, everything that I do,first of all, is trauma-informed
, is neuroscience-rooted, right?
Okay, because we're talkingabout really rewiring,
retraining, doing something thatlasts, making a true difference
, not just something that'stemporary.
(40:08):
Okay, we are going to gothrough how we release these
barriers that keeps us limitedand how we can begin regulating
our nervous system to where wecan be in charge of it.
(40:31):
This is where you stop fightingyourself and start feeling safe
, loved, accepted.
You acknowledge the barriersthat are limiting our decisions,
actions and keeping us stuck.
So the goal is to empower youto take control of the barriers
(40:55):
and unresolved fears limitingyou from living your best life.
Okay, so what that looks like islike you're feeling like you're
constantly on edge, you'reoverthinking every decision,
you're stuck in cycles ofself-doubt, you're struggling to
(41:18):
move forward because you'recarrying the weight of fear,
self-judgment, confusion andpast experiences that you
haven't been able to let go of.
Okay, so we work through it byunderstanding those barriers
that are keeping you stuck.
(41:39):
Okay, and then we startbuilding on the well.
First we have to establish thefoundations of healing, or the
foundations of wholeness, and weexplore these barriers and how
they impact your mind, your body, your spirit and keeping you in
(42:02):
a state of constant high alert.
Because, again, if you're inthat red or yellow, none of this
is going to really stick right.
It'd be good to take somethings and it may make you feel
good for a day to a couple ofweeks, maybe a couple of months,
but then it all comes crashingback down.
(42:23):
We are eliminating that crashand then, after we do that and
establish the foundation anddiscover those barriers and how
they're impacting your mind,then you'll know the importance
of why we have to overcome thosethings.
(42:43):
And so we learn how to regulateour body, our mind, our spirit
so you can start feeling safewithin yourself.
Then we embrace these things sowe can tackle them.
We shift the perspective onvulnerability, seeing it as a
(43:08):
way to overcome, to where we canreally discover our
authenticity, to where we canfind those hidden potentials or
those hidden strengths, to wherewe can get you to the best life
that you want.
Right, that elevation you want,whether it's in your career, in
your personal life, in yourfriendships, in your
(43:29):
relationships, whatever it maybe.
Okay, maybe all of those, Idon't know Okay, so we do some
of those things with somaticpractices like breath work,
grounding exercises, all thatstuff we detach from survival
mode.
Okay, survival is not youridentity, it's not Okay.
(43:54):
And this is where you'll beginto let go of self-doubt,
abandonment, fears, confusionand the need to people, please,
to keep everybody happy, butyourself.
Okay, I should brought somewater up here with me.
(44:18):
Y'all All right.
Then this is also, and then thenext stage is, we'll go into
identifying your values, yourbeliefs, because just because
you were brought up or raised orgrew up with certain things
(44:39):
doesn't mean that they're yourvalues, your beliefs.
How many of us have been in aplace to where we're like dang?
I don't want to pass that on.
I know there are a lot ofgenerational cycle breakers that
are with me, who are like Ican't let that continue.
(45:04):
We're like I can't let thatcontinue.
But these cycles that we'rebreaking sometimes people use
well, it happened to me, orthat's just how it's always been
in our family.
Well, that doesn't mean thatthat's how it always have to be
(45:29):
moving forward.
This is where you'll findconfidence to make a career or
life shift and let go of thefear of judgment, because I know
, when I was in that space forthe longest, I was like oh my
gosh, what are people going tothink about me?
(45:50):
What are they going to say?
What if I say something thatoffends somebody?
But guess what?
I had to go on a hey, an FYItour.
I am on my journey to becomingmy best self.
I'm going to share my storybecause I don't want no one else
(46:10):
to go through the mentalbreakdown that I did.
So therefore, I'm going toshare my story.
I'm going to share my lessons,I'm going to share the things
that I'm learning and I'm goingto teach others to do better and
be better and show them thethings that I wish I knew when I
was in that place, and actuallyI'm going to try to get to them
(46:31):
before they even have thatmental breakdown.
So, therefore, I need you toknow that my story is my story,
it's my story and we may havebeen in that same thing, but the
(46:55):
way it affected me doesn't meanit affected you that way.
So I hope that you can acceptthat and know that I'm not
coming for you, that I'm nottrying to do any of that stuff.
Tell your business anything.
That is my journey.
I'm telling my things and howit affected me.
(47:25):
Some people are just like okay,whatever, like yeah, and then
later on I was, was like whatthe hell was that, you know?
And there's others like, okay,I got you.
And there's others like, okay,I got you.
But you know, you hear throughthe grapevine all the smack
talking, right, but we're notworried about that.
We're worried about being ourbest selves, changing our lives
(47:50):
for the greater, stepping intothe version of you that leads
lives and loves with boldauthenticity.
This isn't about changing whoyou are.
This about.
This isn't about changing whoyou are.
(48:10):
It's about becoming who youwere before the world told you
to shrink y'all.
I'm getting to the end becausemy phone's going off.
Like hey, it's bedtime, I'mgoing on snooze mode.
Like like, I'm going on onsleep time mode.
I'm like hold on what time mode?
I'm like hold on what time isit?
But okay, we're getting there.
Okay.
Then, of course, we're going todiscover authenticity and we're
(48:35):
going to unlock our potentials.
Okay, we're going to reclaimour true essence and set our
soul aligned boundaries and stepfully into our unlimited
potential.
And that will look like feeling,because you might feel like
you're disconnected from who youare.
(48:56):
You're unsure of what you trulywant and you're stuck in people
pleasing patterns, strugglingto set boundaries because you
feel guilty, right, or setboundaries because you're not
sure if that's what you shouldreally do, because it's hard for
you to make decisions, becauseyou can't really trust yourself
(49:19):
to make that decision, becauseyou have a fear that if you do
that, then they're going toleave you, and now you're going
to be abandoned, and then you'renot going to be abandoned, and
then you're not going to havenobody.
And then what are you going todo?
I'm telling you, I rather likeit's so much better not having
the people that I have to peopleplease consistently in my life
(49:44):
and to have those who areauthentically with me.
For me Did it suck on thatjourney?
Because there were some peoplewho I thought would never be out
my life.
They're out my life and,honestly, at first I was like
dang, this sucks.
But then I was like shit, oh mygosh, this is a whole lot
(50:06):
better, but I didn't know thatat that time.
Okay, and so we learn how torelease the limitations caused
by past experience.
Okay, we navigate challengeswith confidence.
We reconnect with our authenticself, your values, your voice,
(50:31):
your vision for your life.
Okay, let's see, this is whereyou discover who you are without
the mask and those who've beenwith me you know we did a whole
thing about the mask that welive with.
Okay, you discover who you arewithout the barriers Fear,
(51:00):
abandonment, confusion,loneliness, all of that stuff.
Okay, and you begin living inalignment with your true self,
aligning your purpose, yourvalues, your habits for
long-term success andfulfillment, because a lot of
times we make success but we'renot fulfilled.
(51:24):
Well, we bring those twotogether.
Okay, here we go.
And so you know.
So, like a lot of times, whenpeople are in this stage and
they're like ready to get thatsuccess and fulfillment, you're
feeling like you know you'reready for more, but you're
unsure how to create a life thatreflects your purpose and
(51:47):
values.
You want to sustain your growthand live with peace, clarity
and fulfillment Right, and we'remaking that happen.
You make that happen.
I just be your guide, empoweringyou on the way, showing you the
different tools and skills andeverything else, implementing
your life to where, when stuffdo start trying to hit the fan,
(52:11):
you can be like stop it and getit all fixed up and bundled up
and thrown out, and going aboutyour way without all these
alarms going off, putting youback on the edge Okay, we're not
living on the edge, okay, andso I go through and I help you
(52:32):
discover your purpose, yourintentional living, uncover your
deeper purpose and align yourlife with what truly matters to
you, create daily habits androutines that support
intentional living and long-termgrowth.
Okay, we're talking aboutelevation and sustainability.
Okay, we step into a life thatreflects your highest potential,
(52:55):
free from the limitations ofyour past.
Okay, and we celebrate yourtransformation and create a plan
for your growth and youralignment, moving forward
because you're no longer stuck.
This is where you align everypart of your life your purpose,
(53:18):
your values, your habits withthe person you were always meant
to be person.
You were always meant to bethat person that is inside you,
that is screaming and wanting tocome out and you're like look,
I need you to be quiet because Idon't know how to even get
there.
And right now, where I'm at,I'm comfortable.
But are you really comfortableor are you stuck?
(53:49):
Are you really comfortable orare you stuck?
We go beyond just understandingwhat's holding you back.
We give you tools, practices,step-by-step guidance to break
free from the barriers andlimitations that keep you stuck.
(54:10):
This is not about changing whoyou are.
It's about becoming who youwere before fear, doubt and
expectations told you to shrink.
Or maybe you never even knewwho you are.
So it's about discovering whoyou are authentically, where
(54:38):
fear, doubt and expectationscan't hold you back.
It may hold you for a moment,but you have enough tools and
skills to be able to recognizethat quickly and move forward
and not remain stuck.
Okay, it's about reclaiming yourvoice, rediscovering your
(55:01):
potential and stepping into alife that feels aligned and
fulfilled and free.
So by the end of this journey,you will move past the barriers
that have been holding you back,rediscover your authentic self,
(55:23):
or discover your authentic self, elevate your life, personal,
career, relationships, whateverto one of clarity, purpose, love
, joy, respect, understanding,and it all starts with taking
the first step.
(55:43):
So, before we go into thatfirst step and you want to be
here for this, because I'm noteven asking you for money, to be
honest I want to go over what Ireally want you to take from
today, from tonight the answersto what you should have gotten
(56:06):
from what's really keeping youstuck and how to unlock the life
you were meant for, okay, sowhy you're feeling stuck?
You've learned that the feelingof being stuck isn't because
(56:27):
you're lazy, it's not becauseyou're broken, it's not because
you're unworthy.
It's because your mind and bodyand spirit have been carrying
barriers, barriers that werecreated to protect you during
difficult times.
(56:48):
These barriers let me take myfoot off this desk.
I'm shaking the desk up yeah,these barriers were created to
protect you from duringdifficult times, right?
These barriers show up asoverthinking, people-pleasing
(57:12):
fear of judgment, emotionalshutdown.
They're not who you are.
They're patterns your bodycreated to help you survive.
Okay, and so traditional advicehasn't worked, or don't always
work.
Because you're in a heightenedstate, you're living in the red
(57:37):
or the yellow, right, because we, you know, I know for one, I
used to hear advice like just bepositive.
Have you heard that?
Just set boundaries.
Just stop caring about whatother people think of you.
Forget them.
(57:59):
Okay, right, do you?
But these approaches don'taddress the root cause of why
you feel stuck.
That's why them alone don'twork.
Because if you're living inthat red where you're just stuck
and you're frozen and you'relike, ooh right.
(58:20):
Or you're living in that yellowwhere you're on the edge and
you're like, ooh right, am Igoing to fight?
Am I going to run?
What am I going to do?
How am I going to sit here andjust be positive and I'm living
on the edge and yeah, no, it'snot going to happen, okay.
So that's why it's not justmindset, okay.
(58:41):
These approaches don't go to theroot cause.
And we're talking about, youknow, doing more.
We're talking about our nervesystem, we're talking about
really paying attention to ourmind, body and spirit.
Okay, and overall, I just wantyou to get that.
(59:02):
You can't mindset your way outof survival.
It's more.
That's why, a lot of times,when y'all come to my DMs and be
like, hey, what do I need to do, and y'all expressing one
little thing, whatever else, I'mlike, ooh, it goes a little bit
deeper, and sometimes I'll do avoice note.
(59:22):
Sometimes I'm like, hey, let'sjust hop on.
Hey, I got 15 minutes freeright now, let me hop on, tell
you this, or whatever else.
Hop on, here's a link, hop onthis video call with me, I'm
going to tell you this, orwhatever else, because I'm not
going to just be like, oh, justset boundaries, or just go to
(59:44):
take this step or whatever else.
It goes deeper when we wanttrue, lasting change,
transformation to where wereally want to get, to where we
really want to be.
Okay, the real reason why youhaven't healed yet.
Healing isn't about forcingyourself to change overnight.
(01:00:05):
It's a process, okay.
Isn't about forcing yourself tochange overnight.
It's a process, okay.
It's about understanding andgently rewiring or rewriting the
patterns that have kept youstuck in survival mode, that
your body has learned, thealarms that go off, the triggers
that we have.
We have to know like okay, wehave to retrain or rewire
(01:00:26):
nervous system and be like okay,that no longer triggers us,
because now we know blah, blah,blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Right, okay, you've learnedthat healing requires a process,
one that works with your body,your mind and spirit to create
safety, clarity and alignment.
Okay, so the path forward isempowered transformational
(01:00:51):
healing Okay, because, again, Ibelieve with everything in me
Because I've done it by.
Many clients have done it Withempowered transformational
healing Okay.
But many clients have done itwith empowered transformational
healing Okay, reaching there,going for promotions, building
(01:01:14):
businesses, going back to school, going for that, you know, that
certification or that degreethey wanted, having healthier
relationships, getting homes,whatever their goals is.
It's different for everybody.
Finding that love that theyhave knew that they had heard
(01:01:36):
themselves before, but never,but don't have now.
Okay, it's different foreverybody, but empower
transformational healing, helpthem because with empowerment,
it makes your journey so muchbetter.
Okay, and transformational.
(01:02:00):
That's what we want.
We don't want something that'stemporary Okay, we want
something that lasts, tools thatlast, something in our tool bag
that we can pull out Okay.
So you now know that the pathto unlocking the life that you
were meant to have starts withthe ETH journey right and power
(01:02:28):
transformation, healing, goingand doing the ODE method, which
is overcome, discover, elevate.
You have a clear, actionableprocess to move from survival to
thriving, to living your bestlife, to elevating right, and
this journey is about releasingthe barriers that no longer
(01:02:51):
serve you, reconnecting withyour authentic self and
elevating your life to one ofpeace, purpose, self, and
elevating your life to one ofpeace, purpose and fulfillment.
So, now that you gain clarityon what's been keeping you stuck
and the path forward, it's timeto take your first step, and I
(01:03:11):
want to make that first step assimple and accessible as
possible for you.
Okay, so let me tell you aboutwhat's waiting for you In module
one of the Breakthrough toAuthenticity program.
Right, the Breakthrough toAuthenticity program is a
(01:03:31):
six-month all-in, all-inclusiveprogram.
You get weekly sessions with me.
You get weekly sessions with me.
We have different tools andaction items.
We do have a little bit ofhomework not a lot, right, but
it's a whole program for you.
(01:03:54):
Okay is where you really beginto realize why you stuck where
you stuck at and how you canbegin to start moving forward.
Right, and that's what todaywas about.
Well, tonight was about, and sothat's why I'm giving you free
(01:04:18):
access to that module one.
Okay, because that's how it canimmediately start helping you
create that transformation thatyou deserve.
And if you've been with me fora while, then you already know
(01:04:44):
that I always present a tool oraction item, because we are
about taking empowered actionhere, right, not about just
hearing things and being awareand not doing anything.
We're about empowered actionand implementing what we learn,
what we discover, and elevatingour lives, moving us closer to
(01:05:09):
the vision that we see, that wewant and that we deserve.
So tonight, again, isn't aworksheet, it isn't a workbook,
it's not a one skill, it's notjust a tool, but it's all of
these and more, okay.
And so your first step to access, your first step is to go and
(01:05:33):
access this free module.
Okay, module one.
Okay, module one.
It's an immediate win, it'simmediate relief, right, and I
want you to, and I want toinvite you to take that first
step in your journey to healing,wholeness and transformation.
(01:05:54):
This is where every clientbegins, the exact place where I
began my own journey, because Ihad to learn these, but I had to
learn it by taking courses, byseeing other people and talking
or whatever.
I was like.
It was a long journey, but nowyou don't have to figure it out,
(01:06:18):
it's figured it out.
It's figured out, it's figuredout.
The process has been laid, it'sbeen tested, it's been proven
time and time again.
Okay, so I want you to go, andit goes to crystaljcom forward
(01:06:46):
slash sneak peek.
Okay, okay, crystaljcom forwardslash sneak peek.
(01:07:22):
It's free.
I hope that's right because Icouldn't see it.
(01:07:50):
Yep, it is Okay.
So it's like I said go and do it, because right now you might
feel like you're spinning yourwheels right.
You're stuck in cycles ofoverthinking, you're stuck in
the cycle of self-doubt, you'restuck in a cycle of exhaustion.
You're stuck in the cycle ofhaving to feel like you haven't
(01:08:11):
approved yourself right andyou've been trying to push
through it, but nothing seems tostick, nothing seems to work.
You may have set boundaries andit's like oh, they're not
listening to me and so there'sno point in having them.
You may be in that whole circleof like I don't know, a whole
(01:08:34):
toxic circle Like no, a wholetoxic circle Like no.
Let's begin to get you to whereyou're feeling like you're safe,
to where you're feeling likeyou love yourself again, to
where you feel like you haveclarity, to where your fear is
not running over you, to whereyou're not constantly people
(01:09:04):
pleasing and abandoning yourself, because one thing about this
journey was I learned that foryears I was so busy people
pleasing because I didn't wantother people to abandon me, but
in that process I abandonedmyself, I silenced myself, and I
(01:09:25):
know you are probably rightthere too.
Let's give you your voice back.
Okay, you might even wonderwhat's wrong with me?
Why can't I just move forward?
But here's the truth there'snothing wrong with you.
(01:09:53):
You've been carrying aroundthese invisible barriers, these
limitations that were neveryours to begin with, and these
barriers are like heavy chains,keeping you anchored in the same
patterns and preventing youfrom stopping fully into the
life that you were made for.
And the hardest part you can'tsee them, but you feel them
every single day when you wakeup, when you go to bed, when you
(01:10:16):
get in your car, when you getout your car, when you're
walking to the office, when youget in your car, when you get
out your car, when you'rewalking to the office, when
you're cooking, when you're inthe shower.
They show up in yourrelationships, your decisions
and the way you talk to yourself.
But what if I told you that youcould begin to break free from
(01:10:39):
those chains today?
So in module one, you'lluncover the invisible forces
that have been quietly shapingyour life, your neurological
barriers, okay, the things thatare keeping you stuck in
survival mode and why it's feltso hard to break free.
You'll finally understand whyyou've been stuck, which is not
(01:11:01):
because you're broken, butbecause your body, mind, spirit
have been doing their best toprotect you.
And, most importantly, you'lllearn how to begin shifting
those patterns, gently,powerfully, so you can start
feeling safe, clear and incontrol again.
(01:11:26):
So I want you to imagine wakingup tomorrow with a new sense of
clarity, a deeper understandingof why you felt the way you
felt for so long.
Imagine feeling lighter, like aweight you've been carrying for
(01:11:46):
years have been lifted.
Imagine seeing yourself not assomeone who's stuck, but as
someone who's finally steppinginto their power, as someone who
is breaking that generationalcycle that you're like.
Oh no, I don't want my kids togo through that.
That's what module one isdesigned to do.
(01:12:07):
It's the foundation foreverything that comes next.
The foundation, the foundation,the foundation, because before
you build a house, you got tohave a solid foundation.
Build a house on a foundationthat's not solid, it's going to
come down right.
We're building the foundation.
This is two weeks of movingforward, so it's more than just
(01:12:36):
something I can just hand to youright here, right now.
That is for one night.
This is a foundation, okay, soagain, go to that crystaljcom
forward slash sneak peek.
(01:12:57):
If you're listening, it'sK-R-Y-S-T-A-L-J-A-Ecom forward
slash sneak peek.
If you're listening, it'sk-r-y-s-t-a-l-j-a-e dot com
forward slash sneak peek andsign up for that.
They don't ask you for no cardinformation.
It's yours, that's your giftfor being here, for getting out
(01:13:19):
of stuckness.
Okay, because I believe thateveryone deserves the chance to
break free from the barriersthat have been holding them back
.
And when you're ready Tocontinue, and when you're ready
(01:13:40):
to continue after the foundationis laid, or even if you're like
okay, like this, the module'sfree, but are you coming with it
?
No, I'm giving y'all thismodule free.
So you're going to have themodule, you're going to have all
the videos, you're going tohave all the, you're going to
have the workbook that goes withit and with that module or
(01:14:02):
whatever else, but you don't getthe one-on-one sessions with me
or the group with me oranything like that.
That's the thing.
That's out of it, buteverything else is in it.
Out of it, but everything elseis in it.
(01:14:23):
And so you're like no, I knowthat I really want to begin this
journey, and six months fromnow, I really want to have
things different.
Then DM me breakthrough andwe'll get you started in the
six-month all-inclusive program.
But for now, start with thatcrystaljcom for a saschny pick,
(01:14:45):
for that two-week module tobuild that foundation, to break
free from that stuckness.
Okay, because you don't have tostay in this place of feeling
stuck, unseen or unsure.
(01:15:06):
You've already taken thehardest step by showing up here
tonight.
The next step is simple and isright in front of you
CrystalJcom, forward slash,sneak peek or DM breakthrough.
Okay, because the life you weremeant for is waiting and it all
(01:15:29):
starts with this moment.
So, as we close, I want you tolet's just take a moment
together, with intention, okay,and I want you to reflect on
this journey we shared.
(01:15:50):
I want you to release anythingthat's no longer serving you and
carry the empowerment, theclarity you've gained into the
rest of your night, for thatgood night rest, that peaceful
(01:16:11):
sleep that you're going to gettonight, and waking up feeling
refreshed and ready to moveforward.
So I want you to find acomfortable position, whether
you're seating or lying down.
(01:16:34):
I want you to close your eyesand take a deep breath in and
slowly exhale.
Now take another deep breath inand out.
(01:16:57):
Now I want you to feel yourbody begin to soften, relax and,
with each breath, breathe inand out.
Keep going.
(01:17:17):
Let go of any tension you maybe holding in your shoulders,
your neck, your jaw, that oneplace in your head, your chest
(01:17:38):
you're still breathing.
Breathe in your chest.
You're still breathing.
Breathe in, breathe out.
Keep going, checking in withyour body.
Release the tension.
(01:18:03):
Allow your breath to flownaturally, steady and calm, like
a gentle wave washing over youas you continue to breathe.
(01:18:25):
Bring your awareness to thismoment.
Let go of any fears, doubts ordistractions.
Release anything that may bekeeping you from fully embracing
the blessings of this timetogether.
(01:18:46):
You are here and you areexactly where you're meant to be
.
Notice the sensations in yourbody, the feeling of your feet
(01:19:08):
on the floor, your hands restinggently, the rhythm of your
breath.
Become fully present here andnow.
Now I invite you to let go ofany emotions that no longer
(01:19:30):
serve you.
Imagine them gently meltingaway with each Exhale, with each
inhale.
(01:19:50):
Welcome in the emotions youwant to expand.
Welcome in the emotions youwant to expand.
Welcome in peace.
Welcome in clarity.
(01:20:13):
Welcome in confidence.
Welcome in self-love.
Welcome in self-love.
Welcome in respect.
Welcome in becomingauthentically you.
(01:20:38):
This moment is about steppinginto your power, reconnecting
with your authentic self andcarrying the transformation
you've experienced today intothe life that you're creating.
I want you to imagine yourselfstanding in front of a door.
(01:21:00):
This door represents thebarriers that have been holding
you back.
Take a deep breath and, as youexhale, feel yourself letting go
(01:21:23):
of any fear or hesitation.
Now visualize yourself openingthe door and stepping through it
.
On the other side is theversion of you who is free,
authentic and empowered.
Free, authentic and empowered.
That version of you is waitingfor you with open arms and, as
(01:21:49):
you step into this space, feelthe lightness in your body, the
clarity in your mind, in thestrength, the love in your heart
.
You are safe, you are whole,you are enough.
(01:22:17):
So repeat, silently or out loudI release what no longer serves
me.
I release what no longer servesme.
I release what no longer servesme.
(01:22:41):
I reclaim my voice.
I reclaim my voice.
I reclaim my voice.
I reclaim my worth.
I reclaim my word.
I reclaim my word.
(01:23:06):
I am worthy of peace, love andjoy.
I am worthy of peace, love andjoy.
I am worthy of peace, love andjoy.
(01:23:32):
I love who I am.
I love who I am.
I love who I am becoming.
I love me.
I am stepping into the life Iwas made for.
(01:24:08):
Now, take a moment to reflect onhow you feel in this space.
Notice the emotions, thesensations, the imagery that's
present.
Allow them to settle into yourheart and mind, solidifying the
(01:24:30):
transformation you'veexperienced today.
Now, decide now to carry thissense of peace, empowerment and
clarity with you, not just fortoday, but for the days to come.
You have the power to choosehow you show up in your life.
(01:24:55):
You have the power to choosehow to show up in your life.
You have the power to choosehow to show up in your life.
Now, gently bring your In, out,in out.
(01:25:28):
Feel the rise and fall of yourchest, the weight of your body
in the room around you, begin towiggle your fingers, your toes,
slowly bringing movement backinto your body, and, when you're
(01:25:50):
ready, open your eyes, take amoment to look around and notice
your environment and welcomeyourself back to full
consciousness, fully aware ofyourself and your surroundings.
(01:26:10):
How was that for you?
Send me a DM Comment on thevideo.
I love talking to y'all.
Like I said, if I don't see itand my va sees it, she lets me
know.
So, hey, and I respond back.
As someone asked me before, doyou respond back?
(01:26:33):
Yeah, I respond back.
Sometimes it's not like thesame day, but I I respond back
as soon as possible.
Usually it is the same day,sometimes it's very quick,
sometimes it's not like the sameday, but I respond back as soon
as possible.
Usually it is the same day,sometimes it's very quick,
sometimes it really depends onwhat it is Okay.
So thank you for showing up foryourself tonight, and the person
(01:26:59):
that you're becoming is alreadywithin you.
You're not broken.
You are whole or you'rebecoming whole, and you can do
this.
I'm with you, and that personinside is waiting for you to
(01:27:21):
continue this journey.
So take action, take empoweredaction, implement.
And as you leave this space,remember you are worthy of peace
, clarity, respect, love and joy.
You are stepping into the lifeyou were made for and I am here
(01:27:48):
to walk this journey with you,this empowered transformational
healing journey with you.
And if you're ready to take thenext step, remember crystaljcom
(01:28:09):
forward slash sneak peek forthat free two week access to
module one or DM breakthrough,and let's get you started in the
six month all inclusive program.
And if you don't want DMEbreakthrough, go straight to the
website crystaljcom forwardslash breakthrough and join.
Okay, let's continue thisjourney together.
Good night,
You can't mindset your way out of survival.
If you've been stuck inoverthinking, people-pleasing,
emotional shutdown andconstantly feeling like you're
on the edge, this message is foryou.
This episode is a replay from alive I did on Facebook and
(00:24):
Instagram, and I knew I had tobring it here, because too many
of us are still asking why?
Why do I feel stuck when I'vetried everything, why can't I
stop caring about what othersthink and why do I keep shutting
(00:45):
down when it's time to takeaction?
You'll hear why your mind, bodyand spirit are still responding
like they're in survival, evenwhen you're ready for more.
You know, and I just want tolet you know, it's not because
you're lazy, it's not becauseyou're not broken or that you
(01:09):
are broken, and it's absolutelynot because you're not unworthy.
You see, you've just builtprotective patterns that once
helped you survive, but nowthey're keeping you from living
the life you're meant to live.
In this episode, I show you howto break free from what's
(01:35):
holding you back, with real talk, practical insight and a fresh
way to look at the patterns thathave been keeping you stuck.
You'll learn how to shift outof survival patterns like
overthinking, people pleasing,fear of judgment, emotional
shutdown and consistent secondguessing.
(01:57):
I'm walking you through my ODEmethod Overcome the barriers
keeping you stuck, discover whoyou truly are and what you're
here to do, and elevate yourlife with clarity, courage and
confidence.
Plus, as always, you know, I'mgiving you something right,
(02:20):
whether it's a tool or aworkbook or a skill or whatever,
but this is all of those.
So I'm giving you a gift tohelp you take the very first
step toward unlocking the lifeyou are meant for.
So be sure to listen all theway through.
(02:43):
This isn't about just thinkingpositive or just setting
boundaries without understandingwhat's really going on
underneath.
This is about real, lastingchange, a true transformation
that aligns with who you trulyare.
(03:04):
Who are you authentically?
So grab a notebook or just letthis play in the background
while you're driving, cleaningor walking.
Just don't miss it, becauseyou're not meant to stay stuck.
You're meant to rise.
So let's take this first steptogether.
(03:34):
What's really keeping you stuckand how to unlock the life that
you were meant for?
Right Y'all?
I've been talking about thiscoming up for like the past two
weeks now, even though it kindof went ghost for a little bit
because I was sick and notfeeling too well, but it's all
(03:54):
good right.
Oh no, we need to center that.
Okay, so here we go.
Okay, so here we go.
(04:17):
So one of the reasons why Ipicked this topic was really
keeping you stuck and how tounlock the life that you were
meant for is because for a verylong time, I lived in a space to
where I was stuck and I didn'trealize I didn't always realize
that I was stuck.
I thought it was just how lifeis right, and it wasn't until I
(04:37):
started actually beginning mytrue healing journey, my
empowered healing journey, myempowered journey to wholeness,
that I realized that I was stuckfor a very long time.
Like I felt like yeah, ofcourse, like you know, there was
times to where I was like, ok,like I'm tired, things aren't
(05:00):
going where it's going.
I was present, but reallywasn't present.
But I didn't realize that itwas considered me being stuck.
I just like, again, it was life.
So when?
So there was oftentimes that Iwoke up just really exhausted,
(05:26):
exhausted with life, not fromlack of sleep, okay, but because
my soul, my spirit was tired.
I was showing up for everyonebut me.
I was always smiling, I servedand I strived for greatness, but
secretly I wondered why do Istill feel like this?
(05:51):
And what this was was confusion, loneliness, the need to please
in order to be accepted.
Really, I was a nice, am Awoman of faith, purpose and
(06:14):
intelligence, but I was stuck inpatterns.
I couldn't see I was living insurvival, but calling it
strength.
Have you ever been like, holdon, let me, okay, like life is
life right now.
Let me put my big girl jaws on,cause that's what I used to be
(06:35):
like.
Okay, it's time for me to goahead and put my big girl jaws
on and let me do this.
Let me take care of thissituation.
Let me go and do some things,make this happen.
But again, it was that I wasliving in survival, but calling
(06:58):
it strength.
So, you see, tonight is notjust about information, it's
about transformation.
And if you've been trapped inoverthinking and people pleasing
(07:19):
and emotional shutdown orperfectionism, okay, I want you
to know that you are not broken.
You are wired for survival andthat wiring can be gently and
powerfully rewritten.
Tonight we will be enhancingyour journey with the
(07:41):
transformation of empoweredtransformational healing, and
you may be like, what's thatwe're going to get into that?
Okay, but first I want to sharenow I know Because, you see, I
know what it means to suffer insilence, to smile while drowning
(08:06):
, to be betrayed by those whoclaim to love me, to be lost,
confused and broken in places noone could see.
I know the weight of traumaemotional, physical, sexual,
medical, psychological all aburden so invisible yet so
(08:28):
unbearably real.
I know what it means to givelove and not have it returned,
to witness abuse and feelpowerless, to stretch myself
thin just to belong and still beleft out in the cold.
I know the ache of friendshipsfading, with no answers, just
(08:54):
echoes of silence.
I know the fear of being seen,the kind that stops dreams from
being born.
I've swallowed my voice to makeothers feel comfortable.
(09:16):
I've chosen them over me, overme.
I know what it is to have liferipped from my womb, to cry out
for help and be met with silenceor, worse, to be saved by
(09:39):
strangers when those I callfriend looked away.
I know what it is to be sick,alone, desperate and still
expected to survive.
I know the sting of my ownmistakes, the guilt that lingers
(10:12):
like shadows, the shame of notbeing my best self.
I know what it is.
I know what it is to livedeeply, to love deeply, to want
deeply, to crave deeply and nothave it in return.
(10:33):
I know what it feels like to betold I am nothing, a burden too
much and never enough.
I know what it feels like to bebranded as a failure, to be
made to believe that my lifewould amount to nothing.
(10:56):
But I also know this I knowthat God is within me and I will
not fail, because those lies,they were never mine to carry.
I know the pain of lies, thekind that can tear your world
(11:18):
apart.
I know the cost of smilingwhile screaming inside and
wondering if there was anybodyto help me.
I've asked God to rescue me andwondered if he heard me.
I've fought unseen battles,spirits heavy on my chest,
(11:43):
darkness sucking out my light.
I've curled into corners,clutching the last pieces of
myself, weeping until there wereno tears left.
But still I rise, because Iknow what it is to be saved by
(12:10):
God, to be handed purpose when Ithought I had none.
I know the unshakable power offaith, the kind that rebuilds
what the world tried to destroy.
I know that no weapon formedagainst me shall prosper.
(12:33):
I know who I am now.
I know the freedom that comesfrom living as my authentic self
, the peace that flows fromhealing.
I am no longer broken to zero.
(12:53):
I rise each day equipped withtools, anchored in truth,
walking in power.
I know that healing is holy,that transformation is real,
like a caterpillar becoming whatit was always destined to be.
(13:17):
I know the power of choosingmyself, self-care, self-love,
self-worth, self-confidence.
I know what it feels like tolive in divine purpose.
I know that.
(13:37):
I know now and now that I know,I teach, I empower, I lead.
I'm a certified in somatic,trauma-informed care, law of
attraction, meditation,therapeutic art for life
(13:58):
coaching.
I use the wisdom from my woundsto help others rise.
I am the guide that I onceneeded, the voice I long to hear
, the light I prayed for in thedark, and now I help others
(14:18):
overcome, discover, elevate,elevate, because healing isn't
the end, it's the beginning ofbecoming who we were always
meant to be through ourempowered, transformational
healing journey.
Now I am Crystal J, so welcome,and hey, hey, it's been a
(14:45):
minute and I'm glad that you arewith me.
So what I ask for this time thatwe are together tonight is that
you show up unapologeticallyfor you, because you deserve
this and, like I said in thebeginning, you're busy putting
(15:06):
the kids to bed, or you're busywashing the dishes after dinner
or getting ready for bed orwhatever.
You need to put your earbuds in.
Okay, because I've been there.
I'd be multitasking too, butthis is knowledge for you,
(15:43):
because you wouldn't belistening to me right now if you
didn't feel that what's reallykeeping you stuck and how to
unlock the life you were meantfor.
So feel free to comment as I go.
I will try my best to keep upwith the comments and we'll see.
Sometimes I answer them duringthe live.
Sometimes I go back and I'll DMyou and answer your questions.
(16:04):
A lot of time I get people whoDM me and I answer in the DMs
Okay, if I see it, I answer it.
If my VA see it, she lets meknow.
So that way I can go back and Ican answer Okay.
So we cool.
So just for a couple of moments, just for a brief moment, okay,
(16:27):
before we just dive in, okay,because we just yeah, let's just
take a few deep breaths, okay,so breathe in and out.
(16:52):
I don't know about y'all, but mynerves and stress and stuff be
up in my neck and my shouldersand I be having to relax that,
especially if you get nerves andanything, it's always my neck
and shoulders for the most part,so I'll be having to, like,
release that, or even in myelbow, y'all, like it's usually
this elbow.
But anyway, did y'all do y'allyou know, take a couple of deep
(17:16):
breaths, a couple of neck rollsso we can begin, okay, so, as I
was preparing for tonight, Ishared some thoughts on on my
Facebook and my Instagram thatreally, that I knew would really
resonate with so many of us,and I want to take a moment to
(17:38):
reflect on them.
I don't want to ignore them,because I did it intentionally.
Okay, because they highlightexactly the struggles that we're
talking about here tonight.
Okay, so, post one the thing wasmostly about being who everyone
else needed me to be, stole meand y'all.
(18:02):
These are really things that,like, I've literally recognized
in my own journey and that someof my past clients have
recognized in their journey, andso I want to know have you ever
felt like you were living foreveryone else but yourself, like
you were so busy being thestrong one, the responsible one,
(18:24):
the peacemaker, that somewherealong the way, you lost yourself
?
Because this post was, thispost was like when I was
thinking about it okay, becauseit's a truth, and it's one that
(18:45):
we don't always admit.
We've been carrying identitiesthat were never ours to begin
with, and it leaves us feelingexhausted, unseen and stuck, and
tonight we're going to talkabout how to start coming home
to yourself.
Okay, post two today wasminimizing myself became my
(19:12):
survival.
Again, minimizing myself becamemy survival.
See, this post is for those ofyou who learned to shrink
themselves to survive.
I've been there.
Maybe you silenced your spiritto keep the peace or questioned
(19:37):
yourself because trusting othersgot you hurt, but here's the
truth.
Here's the truth.
Here's the truth.
Your spirit wasn't made to bemuted and your voice was never
the problem.
Tonight, we'll talk about howto reclaim your voice and step
(20:07):
into your fullness without fear.
Okay, post three.
Post three I've seen that I'llanswer you in a minute.
(20:36):
Actually, I'm gonna DM you.
Okay, post three I lost atbeing me all for the sake of
love.
Now, this one hit deep becausethere's a specific kind of grief
that comes from abandoningyourself for love, whether it's
(21:00):
romantic, family or evenfriendships.
We settle, we shrink, we betrayourselves just to feel safe or
chosen.
But what if healing doesn'trequire you to earn love?
(21:21):
By disappointing, bydisappearing Is what I'm trying
to say, yeah.
So what if healing doesn'trequire you to earn love by
disappearing or feel like you'redisappointing others?
Tonight we're going to explorethat as well how to break free
(21:53):
from the chains of conditionallove and rediscover the real you
.
Pulse four was dead-end jobs,dead-end relationships, and
still I stayed.
Now, for those of us who stayedin places we knew we weren't
aligned with, whether it's jobs,relationships or even just the
(22:13):
patterns that we have been usedto, that we've accepted, because
fear made the decisions thatthis is where we're going to be.
We're just going to stay here.
We're not going to move forward.
(22:33):
I may not like it here, butit's somewhat comfortable
because I know what to expectRight.
Somewhat comfortable because Iknow what to expect right
Because sometimes we don't moveforward because we don't know
(22:55):
what is coming right.
You see, trauma has a way ofmaking us second guess
everything.
The things that we'veexperienced in life has a way to
make a second guess everything,even our own potential.
We stay in people pleasing fear, confusion and self-doubt, but
(23:25):
tonight we're going to talkabout how to break the cycle and
start trusting yourself tochoose better.
Now, post five, I dim my lightjust enough to be seen, but not
enough to shine.
This post speaks to the fear ofbeing unloved, not accepted,
(24:04):
not enough, not accepted, notenough.
It's the fear that keeps usplaying small, doing just enough
to get, to just get by, butnever enough for us to truly
shine.
But you weren't made to shrink,you were made to step into your
(24:29):
greatness.
And tonight let's talk abouthow to stop dimming your light
and start living boldly andauthentically.
You see, these stories and yes,I do know some of those posts
had like different phrases, butthey were made from these five,
(24:54):
just different words, okay.
But if you have one that youreally want to reach out to me
about, dm me, let's talk aboutit.
But these stories, thesestruggles, these situations,
these circumstances, they're notjust yours.
(25:15):
They're patterns.
We've been taught to survive,but they're not who we are.
And tonight I'm going to showyou why these patterns exist,
how they've been keeping youstuck and how we can begin
rewiring, rewriting themtogether.
So let's start by understandingwhat's really keeping you stuck.
(25:39):
So what if I told you you'renot the problem, your nervous
system is just doing its job.
So your brain, or our brain,right?
Our nervous system is wired toprotect us.
It's not wired to be like, oh,let us get all the pretty things
(26:04):
.
It's wired to protect us, okay.
And so when stress or difficultcircumstances or trauma hit, our
amygdala takes over Ourprefrontal cortex, our logic
(26:25):
shuts down, we enter the fight,flight, freeze right and this,
and you're probably like whatare you talking about?
Okay, it may look like, let'ssee you overthink everything,
every text, every conversation.
You know this is also why youfeel tense, even when everything
(26:52):
is fine.
This is why you can't relax,even when you're just trying to
rest.
Okay, and you didn't choosethese patterns.
Your body did.
And it's not about what's wrongwith you.
(27:12):
It's not about happened to youand what your body believed it
had to do to protect you, okay,so if you've been struggling
(27:58):
with low self-esteem, self-doubt, abandonment, confusion, trust
issues, this isn't your fault.
These are survival patternsyour body had created to keep
you safe.
So why haven't I healed yet?
You know, is that what you'rewondering?
Oftentimes, and even sometimesI have to catch myself, and a
(28:19):
lot of times when people ask mefor questions, I'm like ooh,
it's not just a one sentenceanswer, right.
Because sometimes people arelike okay, you can tell me one
thing and it'll be good.
No, no, no, no, no.
It goes deeper, and that'swhat's the difference with what
(28:42):
I do.
We go deeper, okay, because,you see, mindset is part of the
journey, but it's not healing,it's not wholeness, it's part of
the journey, okay, so the justbe positive, or just set
(29:05):
boundaries, or just stop caringwhat people think.
You know why these don't work,those things don't work?
Because when the nervous systemis dysregulated all over the
place, when the nervous systemis dysregulated all over the
(29:32):
place, we can't mindset our wayout of survival and you must
feel your way back into safety.
Okay, so let me explain this.
Let me explain something, okay,so I know some of you that's
been with me, we talked, like Idid a whole thing, about the
traffic lights up in Tallinn.
Right, the red, green, yellow,just like the traffic lights
(29:55):
when we're driving down the road, or, if you don't drive, you're
in your Uber or in yourfriend's car or mama car,
whoever, and you're driving downthe road and we have the
stoplights All of us have seenthem, okay, and you have the red
light, you're stopped, you'restuck, you're frozen, you can't
go.
Okay, the yellow, we kind oflike, you know, we look around
(30:16):
and then we might go a littlebit.
You know we speed up whateveris cautious, basically Right.
So some people stop, somepeople speed us, some of us just
be cautious and go ahead and belike how much time we have,
whatever.
Okay, you get the point.
And green, of course, means goright.
It's safe for you to go, okay.
(30:38):
So an easy way to kind ofexplain this is this is an easy
way to kind of understand howour nervous system responds to
stress and why some patternsfeel so hard to break.
Okay, so our red light is ourventral vagal shutdown.
It's freeze.
Okay, this is when our systemfeels completely overwhelmed.
(31:00):
You might feel numb,disconnected, or like you're
just going through the emotions.
It's not just laziness, okay,it's not just laziness.
Okay, it's not just laziness,it's your body's way of shutting
down to protect you.
Okay, the yellow light right,it's like a sympathetic
(31:22):
overdrive.
Your fight or flight.
This is when you're in a highalert.
Maybe you're overthinking.
You're fight or flight.
This is when you're in a highalert.
Maybe you're overthinking.
You're feeling anxious.
You're like constantly on theedge and your body is ready to
go, it's ready to jump.
Am I going to fight?
Am I going to run.
What am I going to do?
Because I'm just ready to go,I'm just like hey, any moment.
(31:44):
But sometimes there's no realdanger, okay, and you're just
living in that, right.
Then we have the green light.
Right Before we even go to thegreen light, how can we function
and be like and be like justdon't worry or it'll be okay, or
(32:13):
just pray about it, or who arethe other ones?
Just set boundaries, just bepositive?
If we're living in those othertwo, the red or yellow, how are
we supposed to just be okay withjust that?
How is that supposed to calmyou down and really be like,
okay, yeah, you're right, okay,it's not going to happen.
(32:37):
But when we are in the greenlight the dorsal safety
connection okay, this is wherehealing, happiness, this is
where we are going on our way towholeness, right, this is where
we can truly function.
As our best self nervous systemhas been stuck in red or yellow
(33:12):
for too long, it can feelimpossible to get to that green,
to get to the safety, to get tothe connection, to get to the
calm, the peace, the clarityOkay, and when your nervous
system again is in that red oryellow, and when your nervous
(33:34):
system again is in that red oryellow, there's no amount of
positive thinking, boundarysetting that will stick.
It may be good for that moment,but it's not going to stick
because you don't feel safe.
So how can you fully openyourself up to receive it?
And this is why mindset aloneisn't enough.
You have to work with yournervous system to create safety
(33:55):
first.
Okay, and so that's where theEmpowered Transformational
(34:21):
Healing Framework and the ODEmethod comes in.
They're designed to help youmove out of survival mode and
into a state of safety, clarity,alignment, where true healing
and wholeness can happen.
So the ETH framework, orEmpowered Transformational
Healing, it's the journey thatyou are embracing, learning and
implementing with me, becausewith every core of my being, I
(34:44):
believe that empowerment is amust along our journey to
healing and wholeness.
And I'm saying this after, ohmy gosh years, decades it makes
me feel like I'm old, but I'mnot y'all but years of literally
going through traditionaltherapy.
Okay, and this was a light bulbmoment after I had a mental
(35:05):
breakdown and was really goingon this healing journey Not
knowing what I was looking for,but knowing that something had
to be better Because therapy wasjust getting me to my state of
okay, this is life, to my stateof okay, this is life, but it
(35:29):
wasn't getting me to the betterlife, the vision that I had for
myself, okay, the purpose that Iknew, that was instilled in me
and so empowered.
(35:51):
Transformational healing getsyou to wholeness.
It's what empowers us on thistransformational journey and I
discovered it on my journey fromfailure, confusion, silent
(36:13):
cries and unthinkable thoughts.
It empowered me to become myauthentic self and overcome the
barriers that were limiting mylife, helping me to discover my
authentic self, unlockinguntapped potential that I didn't
(36:34):
know, that I even had.
It was like hidden somewhereand I was like whoa, okay, like
I see you, okay, and that's howyou're going to be.
You're going to be like okay, Isee me, let me go, okay, and
that's how you're going to be.
You're going to be like okay, Isee me, let me go, okay, and so
you're going to and this isgoing to like it truly like
elevated my life completely Okay, Because, back in the day,
(37:01):
there's no way I will be sittinghere on a live, there's no way
that I would be like sharing mystory would be like sharing my
story.
There's no way that I would bedoing any of this thing, because
, again, I am who I needed to beback when I was stuck, lost,
confused, broken, ashamed andjust didn't know what the heck
(37:27):
to do.
So that's why this is importantfor me, okay, and so this isn't
just about healing, it's abouttransforming into the person you
were always meant to be okay,you were always meant to be Okay
, and so I want you to imaginetrying to run a race with
(37:50):
weights tied to your anklesright?
You're not even working outwith the little ankle weights.
You're running a marathon rightnow, and your mindset tells you
just run harder.
Okay, well, my method helps youremove those weights and you
can finally run free.
(38:10):
Okay Now, the ODE methodOvercome, discover, elevate is
the heart of how I help womenand a few men like you move
beyond awareness into action andtransformation, making sure
that we are implementing.
(38:30):
Okay, because if we are aware ofsomething but we don't take
action and we don't implementthings, there's not going to be
a transformation.
Okay, so it's not just aframework, it's a journey, a
step-by-step process that workswith your body, mind and spirit
to create lasting change.
You've already taken the firststep by becoming aware that
(38:55):
something isn't working, butawareness alone isn't enough,
right, it's not enough.
And you're wondering, like dang, like, what is the next step?
What do I need to do?
I wish that someone could tellme the next step.
And I'm going to do it.
Right, have you said that?
Because that's where I was.
(39:17):
And I'm tell you another secretEvery level that we get to
where I was, like, okay, what'sthe next step?
And so, like me, as a coach Ihave a coach.
Okay, like we're all.
I'm not going to tell y'all todo something I'm not doing
myself, Okay, so overcome.
(39:47):
Okay, everything that I do,first of all, is trauma-informed
, is neuroscience-rooted, right?
Okay, because we're talkingabout really rewiring,
retraining, doing something thatlasts, making a true difference
, not just something that'stemporary.
(40:08):
Okay, we are going to gothrough how we release these
barriers that keeps us limitedand how we can begin regulating
our nervous system to where wecan be in charge of it.
(40:31):
This is where you stop fightingyourself and start feeling safe
, loved, accepted.
You acknowledge the barriersthat are limiting our decisions,
actions and keeping us stuck.
So the goal is to empower youto take control of the barriers
(40:55):
and unresolved fears limitingyou from living your best life.
Okay, so what that looks like islike you're feeling like you're
constantly on edge, you'reoverthinking every decision,
you're stuck in cycles ofself-doubt, you're struggling to
(41:18):
move forward because you'recarrying the weight of fear,
self-judgment, confusion andpast experiences that you
haven't been able to let go of.
Okay, so we work through it byunderstanding those barriers
that are keeping you stuck.
(41:39):
Okay, and then we startbuilding on the well.
First we have to establish thefoundations of healing, or the
foundations of wholeness, and weexplore these barriers and how
they impact your mind, your body, your spirit and keeping you in
(42:02):
a state of constant high alert.
Because, again, if you're inthat red or yellow, none of this
is going to really stick right.
It'd be good to take somethings and it may make you feel
good for a day to a couple ofweeks, maybe a couple of months,
but then it all comes crashingback down.
(42:23):
We are eliminating that crashand then, after we do that and
establish the foundation anddiscover those barriers and how
they're impacting your mind,then you'll know the importance
of why we have to overcome thosethings.
(42:43):
And so we learn how to regulateour body, our mind, our spirit
so you can start feeling safewithin yourself.
Then we embrace these things sowe can tackle them.
We shift the perspective onvulnerability, seeing it as a
(43:08):
way to overcome, to where we canreally discover our
authenticity, to where we canfind those hidden potentials or
those hidden strengths, to wherewe can get you to the best life
that you want.
Right, that elevation you want,whether it's in your career, in
your personal life, in yourfriendships, in your
(43:29):
relationships, whatever it maybe.
Okay, maybe all of those, Idon't know Okay, so we do some
of those things with somaticpractices like breath work,
grounding exercises, all thatstuff we detach from survival
mode.
Okay, survival is not youridentity, it's not Okay.
(43:54):
And this is where you'll beginto let go of self-doubt,
abandonment, fears, confusionand the need to people, please,
to keep everybody happy, butyourself.
Okay, I should brought somewater up here with me.
(44:18):
Y'all All right.
Then this is also, and then thenext stage is, we'll go into
identifying your values, yourbeliefs, because just because
you were brought up or raised orgrew up with certain things
(44:39):
doesn't mean that they're yourvalues, your beliefs.
How many of us have been in aplace to where we're like dang?
I don't want to pass that on.
I know there are a lot ofgenerational cycle breakers that
are with me, who are like Ican't let that continue.
(45:04):
We're like I can't let thatcontinue.
But these cycles that we'rebreaking sometimes people use
well, it happened to me, orthat's just how it's always been
in our family.
Well, that doesn't mean thatthat's how it always have to be
(45:29):
moving forward.
This is where you'll findconfidence to make a career or
life shift and let go of thefear of judgment, because I know
, when I was in that space forthe longest, I was like oh my
gosh, what are people going tothink about me?
(45:50):
What are they going to say?
What if I say something thatoffends somebody?
But guess what?
I had to go on a hey, an FYItour.
I am on my journey to becomingmy best self.
I'm going to share my storybecause I don't want no one else
(46:10):
to go through the mentalbreakdown that I did.
So therefore, I'm going toshare my story.
I'm going to share my lessons,I'm going to share the things
that I'm learning and I'm goingto teach others to do better and
be better and show them thethings that I wish I knew when I
was in that place, and actuallyI'm going to try to get to them
(46:31):
before they even have thatmental breakdown.
So, therefore, I need you toknow that my story is my story,
it's my story and we may havebeen in that same thing, but the
(46:55):
way it affected me doesn't meanit affected you that way.
So I hope that you can acceptthat and know that I'm not
coming for you, that I'm nottrying to do any of that stuff.
Tell your business anything.
That is my journey.
I'm telling my things and howit affected me.
(47:25):
Some people are just like okay,whatever, like yeah, and then
later on I was, was like whatthe hell was that, you know?
And there's others like, okay,I got you.
And there's others like, okay,I got you.
But you know, you hear throughthe grapevine all the smack
talking, right, but we're notworried about that.
We're worried about being ourbest selves, changing our lives
(47:50):
for the greater, stepping intothe version of you that leads
lives and loves with boldauthenticity.
This isn't about changing whoyou are.
This about.
This isn't about changing whoyou are.
(48:10):
It's about becoming who youwere before the world told you
to shrink y'all.
I'm getting to the end becausemy phone's going off.
Like hey, it's bedtime, I'mgoing on snooze mode.
Like like, I'm going on onsleep time mode.
I'm like hold on what time mode?
I'm like hold on what time isit?
But okay, we're getting there.
Okay.
Then, of course, we're going todiscover authenticity and we're
(48:35):
going to unlock our potentials.
Okay, we're going to reclaimour true essence and set our
soul aligned boundaries and stepfully into our unlimited
potential.
And that will look like feeling,because you might feel like
you're disconnected from who youare.
(48:56):
You're unsure of what you trulywant and you're stuck in people
pleasing patterns, strugglingto set boundaries because you
feel guilty, right, or setboundaries because you're not
sure if that's what you shouldreally do, because it's hard for
you to make decisions, becauseyou can't really trust yourself
(49:19):
to make that decision, becauseyou have a fear that if you do
that, then they're going toleave you, and now you're going
to be abandoned, and then you'renot going to be abandoned, and
then you're not going to havenobody.
And then what are you going todo?
I'm telling you, I rather likeit's so much better not having
the people that I have to peopleplease consistently in my life
(49:44):
and to have those who areauthentically with me.
For me Did it suck on thatjourney?
Because there were some peoplewho I thought would never be out
my life.
They're out my life and,honestly, at first I was like
dang, this sucks.
But then I was like shit, oh mygosh, this is a whole lot
(50:06):
better, but I didn't know thatat that time.
Okay, and so we learn how torelease the limitations caused
by past experience.
Okay, we navigate challengeswith confidence.
We reconnect with our authenticself, your values, your voice,
(50:31):
your vision for your life.
Okay, let's see, this is whereyou discover who you are without
the mask and those who've beenwith me you know we did a whole
thing about the mask that welive with.
Okay, you discover who you arewithout the barriers Fear,
(51:00):
abandonment, confusion,loneliness, all of that stuff.
Okay, and you begin living inalignment with your true self,
aligning your purpose, yourvalues, your habits for
long-term success andfulfillment, because a lot of
times we make success but we'renot fulfilled.
(51:24):
Well, we bring those twotogether.
Okay, here we go.
And so you know.
So, like a lot of times, whenpeople are in this stage and
they're like ready to get thatsuccess and fulfillment, you're
feeling like you know you'reready for more, but you're
unsure how to create a life thatreflects your purpose and
(51:47):
values.
You want to sustain your growthand live with peace, clarity
and fulfillment Right, and we'remaking that happen.
You make that happen.
I just be your guide, empoweringyou on the way, showing you the
different tools and skills andeverything else, implementing
your life to where, when stuffdo start trying to hit the fan,
(52:11):
you can be like stop it and getit all fixed up and bundled up
and thrown out, and going aboutyour way without all these
alarms going off, putting youback on the edge Okay, we're not
living on the edge, okay, andso I go through and I help you
(52:32):
discover your purpose, yourintentional living, uncover your
deeper purpose and align yourlife with what truly matters to
you, create daily habits androutines that support
intentional living and long-termgrowth.
Okay, we're talking aboutelevation and sustainability.
Okay, we step into a life thatreflects your highest potential,
(52:55):
free from the limitations ofyour past.
Okay, and we celebrate yourtransformation and create a plan
for your growth and youralignment, moving forward
because you're no longer stuck.
This is where you align everypart of your life your purpose,
(53:18):
your values, your habits withthe person you were always meant
to be person.
You were always meant to bethat person that is inside you,
that is screaming and wanting tocome out and you're like look,
I need you to be quiet because Idon't know how to even get
there.
And right now, where I'm at,I'm comfortable.
But are you really comfortableor are you stuck?
(53:49):
Are you really comfortable orare you stuck?
We go beyond just understandingwhat's holding you back.
We give you tools, practices,step-by-step guidance to break
free from the barriers andlimitations that keep you stuck.
(54:10):
This is not about changing whoyou are.
It's about becoming who youwere before fear, doubt and
expectations told you to shrink.
Or maybe you never even knewwho you are.
So it's about discovering whoyou are authentically, where
(54:38):
fear, doubt and expectationscan't hold you back.
It may hold you for a moment,but you have enough tools and
skills to be able to recognizethat quickly and move forward
and not remain stuck.
Okay, it's about reclaiming yourvoice, rediscovering your
(55:01):
potential and stepping into alife that feels aligned and
fulfilled and free.
So by the end of this journey,you will move past the barriers
that have been holding you back,rediscover your authentic self,
(55:23):
or discover your authentic self, elevate your life, personal,
career, relationships, whateverto one of clarity, purpose, love
, joy, respect, understanding,and it all starts with taking
the first step.
(55:43):
So, before we go into thatfirst step and you want to be
here for this, because I'm noteven asking you for money, to be
honest I want to go over what Ireally want you to take from
today, from tonight the answersto what you should have gotten
(56:06):
from what's really keeping youstuck and how to unlock the life
you were meant for, okay, sowhy you're feeling stuck?
You've learned that the feelingof being stuck isn't because
(56:27):
you're lazy, it's not becauseyou're broken, it's not because
you're unworthy.
It's because your mind and bodyand spirit have been carrying
barriers, barriers that werecreated to protect you during
difficult times.
(56:48):
These barriers let me take myfoot off this desk.
I'm shaking the desk up yeah,these barriers were created to
protect you from duringdifficult times, right?
These barriers show up asoverthinking, people-pleasing
(57:12):
fear of judgment, emotionalshutdown.
They're not who you are.
They're patterns your bodycreated to help you survive.
Okay, and so traditional advicehasn't worked, or don't always
work.
Because you're in a heightenedstate, you're living in the red
(57:37):
or the yellow, right, because we, you know, I know for one, I
used to hear advice like just bepositive.
Have you heard that?
Just set boundaries.
Just stop caring about whatother people think of you.
Forget them.
(57:59):
Okay, right, do you?
But these approaches don'taddress the root cause of why
you feel stuck.
That's why them alone don'twork.
Because if you're living inthat red where you're just stuck
and you're frozen and you'relike, ooh right.
(58:20):
Or you're living in that yellowwhere you're on the edge and
you're like, ooh right, am Igoing to fight?
Am I going to run?
What am I going to do?
How am I going to sit here andjust be positive and I'm living
on the edge and yeah, no, it'snot going to happen, okay.
So that's why it's not justmindset, okay.
(58:41):
These approaches don't go to theroot cause.
And we're talking about, youknow, doing more.
We're talking about our nervesystem, we're talking about
really paying attention to ourmind, body and spirit.
Okay, and overall, I just wantyou to get that.
(59:02):
You can't mindset your way outof survival.
It's more.
That's why, a lot of times,when y'all come to my DMs and be
like, hey, what do I need to do, and y'all expressing one
little thing, whatever else, I'mlike, ooh, it goes a little bit
deeper, and sometimes I'll do avoice note.
(59:22):
Sometimes I'm like, hey, let'sjust hop on.
Hey, I got 15 minutes freeright now, let me hop on, tell
you this, or whatever else.
Hop on, here's a link, hop onthis video call with me, I'm
going to tell you this, orwhatever else, because I'm not
going to just be like, oh, justset boundaries, or just go to
(59:44):
take this step or whatever else.
It goes deeper when we wanttrue, lasting change,
transformation to where wereally want to get, to where we
really want to be.
Okay, the real reason why youhaven't healed yet.
Healing isn't about forcingyourself to change overnight.
(01:00:05):
It's a process, okay.
Isn't about forcing yourself tochange overnight.
It's a process, okay.
It's about understanding andgently rewiring or rewriting the
patterns that have kept youstuck in survival mode, that
your body has learned, thealarms that go off, the triggers
that we have.
We have to know like okay, wehave to retrain or rewire
(01:00:26):
nervous system and be like okay,that no longer triggers us,
because now we know blah, blah,blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Right, okay, you've learnedthat healing requires a process,
one that works with your body,your mind and spirit to create
safety, clarity and alignment.
Okay, so the path forward isempowered transformational
(01:00:51):
healing Okay, because, again, Ibelieve with everything in me
Because I've done it by.
Many clients have done it Withempowered transformational
healing Okay.
But many clients have done itwith empowered transformational
healing Okay, reaching there,going for promotions, building
(01:01:14):
businesses, going back to school, going for that, you know, that
certification or that degreethey wanted, having healthier
relationships, getting homes,whatever their goals is.
It's different for everybody.
Finding that love that theyhave knew that they had heard
(01:01:36):
themselves before, but never,but don't have now.
Okay, it's different foreverybody, but empower
transformational healing, helpthem because with empowerment,
it makes your journey so muchbetter.
Okay, and transformational.
(01:02:00):
That's what we want.
We don't want something that'stemporary Okay, we want
something that lasts, tools thatlast, something in our tool bag
that we can pull out Okay.
So you now know that the pathto unlocking the life that you
were meant to have starts withthe ETH journey right and power
(01:02:28):
transformation, healing, goingand doing the ODE method, which
is overcome, discover, elevate.
You have a clear, actionableprocess to move from survival to
thriving, to living your bestlife, to elevating right, and
this journey is about releasingthe barriers that no longer
(01:02:51):
serve you, reconnecting withyour authentic self and
elevating your life to one ofpeace, purpose, self, and
elevating your life to one ofpeace, purpose and fulfillment.
So, now that you gain clarityon what's been keeping you stuck
and the path forward, it's timeto take your first step, and I
(01:03:11):
want to make that first step assimple and accessible as
possible for you.
Okay, so let me tell you aboutwhat's waiting for you In module
one of the Breakthrough toAuthenticity program.
Right, the Breakthrough toAuthenticity program is a
(01:03:31):
six-month all-in, all-inclusiveprogram.
You get weekly sessions with me.
You get weekly sessions with me.
We have different tools andaction items.
We do have a little bit ofhomework not a lot, right, but
it's a whole program for you.
(01:03:54):
Okay is where you really beginto realize why you stuck where
you stuck at and how you canbegin to start moving forward.
Right, and that's what todaywas about.
Well, tonight was about, and sothat's why I'm giving you free
(01:04:18):
access to that module one.
Okay, because that's how it canimmediately start helping you
create that transformation thatyou deserve.
And if you've been with me fora while, then you already know
(01:04:44):
that I always present a tool oraction item, because we are
about taking empowered actionhere, right, not about just
hearing things and being awareand not doing anything.
We're about empowered actionand implementing what we learn,
what we discover, and elevatingour lives, moving us closer to
(01:05:09):
the vision that we see, that wewant and that we deserve.
So tonight, again, isn't aworksheet, it isn't a workbook,
it's not a one skill, it's notjust a tool, but it's all of
these and more, okay.
And so your first step to access, your first step is to go and
(01:05:33):
access this free module.
Okay, module one.
Okay, module one.
It's an immediate win, it'simmediate relief, right, and I
want you to, and I want toinvite you to take that first
step in your journey to healing,wholeness and transformation.
(01:05:54):
This is where every clientbegins, the exact place where I
began my own journey, because Ihad to learn these, but I had to
learn it by taking courses, byseeing other people and talking
or whatever.
I was like.
It was a long journey, but nowyou don't have to figure it out,
(01:06:18):
it's figured it out.
It's figured out, it's figuredout.
The process has been laid, it'sbeen tested, it's been proven
time and time again.
Okay, so I want you to go, andit goes to crystaljcom forward
(01:06:46):
slash sneak peek.
Okay, okay, crystaljcom forwardslash sneak peek.
(01:07:22):
It's free.
I hope that's right because Icouldn't see it.
(01:07:50):
Yep, it is Okay.
So it's like I said go and do it, because right now you might
feel like you're spinning yourwheels right.
You're stuck in cycles ofoverthinking, you're stuck in
the cycle of self-doubt, you'restuck in a cycle of exhaustion.
You're stuck in the cycle ofhaving to feel like you haven't
(01:08:11):
approved yourself right andyou've been trying to push
through it, but nothing seems tostick, nothing seems to work.
You may have set boundaries andit's like oh, they're not
listening to me and so there'sno point in having them.
You may be in that whole circleof like I don't know, a whole
(01:08:34):
toxic circle Like no, a wholetoxic circle Like no.
Let's begin to get you to whereyou're feeling like you're safe,
to where you're feeling likeyou love yourself again, to
where you feel like you haveclarity, to where your fear is
not running over you, to whereyou're not constantly people
(01:09:04):
pleasing and abandoning yourself, because one thing about this
journey was I learned that foryears I was so busy people
pleasing because I didn't wantother people to abandon me, but
in that process I abandonedmyself, I silenced myself, and I
(01:09:25):
know you are probably rightthere too.
Let's give you your voice back.
Okay, you might even wonderwhat's wrong with me?
Why can't I just move forward?
But here's the truth there'snothing wrong with you.
(01:09:53):
You've been carrying aroundthese invisible barriers, these
limitations that were neveryours to begin with, and these
barriers are like heavy chains,keeping you anchored in the same
patterns and preventing youfrom stopping fully into the
life that you were made for.
And the hardest part you can'tsee them, but you feel them
every single day when you wakeup, when you go to bed, when you
(01:10:16):
get in your car, when you getout your car, when you're
walking to the office, when youget in your car, when you get
out your car, when you'rewalking to the office, when
you're cooking, when you're inthe shower.
They show up in yourrelationships, your decisions
and the way you talk to yourself.
But what if I told you that youcould begin to break free from
(01:10:39):
those chains today?
So in module one, you'lluncover the invisible forces
that have been quietly shapingyour life, your neurological
barriers, okay, the things thatare keeping you stuck in
survival mode and why it's feltso hard to break free.
You'll finally understand whyyou've been stuck, which is not
(01:11:01):
because you're broken, butbecause your body, mind, spirit
have been doing their best toprotect you.
And, most importantly, you'lllearn how to begin shifting
those patterns, gently,powerfully, so you can start
feeling safe, clear and incontrol again.
(01:11:26):
So I want you to imagine wakingup tomorrow with a new sense of
clarity, a deeper understandingof why you felt the way you
felt for so long.
Imagine feeling lighter, like aweight you've been carrying for
(01:11:46):
years have been lifted.
Imagine seeing yourself not assomeone who's stuck, but as
someone who's finally steppinginto their power, as someone who
is breaking that generationalcycle that you're like.
Oh no, I don't want my kids togo through that.
That's what module one isdesigned to do.
(01:12:07):
It's the foundation foreverything that comes next.
The foundation, the foundation,the foundation, because before
you build a house, you got tohave a solid foundation.
Build a house on a foundationthat's not solid, it's going to
come down right.
We're building the foundation.
This is two weeks of movingforward, so it's more than just
(01:12:36):
something I can just hand to youright here, right now.
That is for one night.
This is a foundation, okay, soagain, go to that crystaljcom
forward slash sneak peek.
(01:12:57):
If you're listening, it'sK-R-Y-S-T-A-L-J-A-Ecom forward
slash sneak peek.
If you're listening, it'sk-r-y-s-t-a-l-j-a-e dot com
forward slash sneak peek andsign up for that.
They don't ask you for no cardinformation.
It's yours, that's your giftfor being here, for getting out
(01:13:19):
of stuckness.
Okay, because I believe thateveryone deserves the chance to
break free from the barriersthat have been holding them back
.
And when you're ready Tocontinue, and when you're ready
(01:13:40):
to continue after the foundationis laid, or even if you're like
okay, like this, the module'sfree, but are you coming with it
?
No, I'm giving y'all thismodule free.
So you're going to have themodule, you're going to have all
the videos, you're going tohave all the, you're going to
have the workbook that goes withit and with that module or
(01:14:02):
whatever else, but you don't getthe one-on-one sessions with me
or the group with me oranything like that.
That's the thing.
That's out of it, buteverything else is in it.
Out of it, but everything elseis in it.
(01:14:23):
And so you're like no, I knowthat I really want to begin this
journey, and six months fromnow, I really want to have
things different.
Then DM me breakthrough andwe'll get you started in the
six-month all-inclusive program.
But for now, start with thatcrystaljcom for a saschny pick,
(01:14:45):
for that two-week module tobuild that foundation, to break
free from that stuckness.
Okay, because you don't have tostay in this place of feeling
stuck, unseen or unsure.
(01:15:06):
You've already taken thehardest step by showing up here
tonight.
The next step is simple and isright in front of you
CrystalJcom, forward slash,sneak peek or DM breakthrough.
Okay, because the life you weremeant for is waiting and it all
(01:15:29):
starts with this moment.
So, as we close, I want you tolet's just take a moment
together, with intention, okay,and I want you to reflect on
this journey we shared.
(01:15:50):
I want you to release anythingthat's no longer serving you and
carry the empowerment, theclarity you've gained into the
rest of your night, for thatgood night rest, that peaceful
(01:16:11):
sleep that you're going to gettonight, and waking up feeling
refreshed and ready to moveforward.
So I want you to find acomfortable position, whether
you're seating or lying down.
(01:16:34):
I want you to close your eyesand take a deep breath in and
slowly exhale.
Now take another deep breath inand out.
(01:16:57):
Now I want you to feel yourbody begin to soften, relax and,
with each breath, breathe inand out.
Keep going.
(01:17:17):
Let go of any tension you maybe holding in your shoulders,
your neck, your jaw, that oneplace in your head, your chest
(01:17:38):
you're still breathing.
Breathe in your chest.
You're still breathing.
Breathe in, breathe out.
Keep going, checking in withyour body.
Release the tension.
(01:18:03):
Allow your breath to flownaturally, steady and calm, like
a gentle wave washing over youas you continue to breathe.
(01:18:25):
Bring your awareness to thismoment.
Let go of any fears, doubts ordistractions.
Release anything that may bekeeping you from fully embracing
the blessings of this timetogether.
(01:18:46):
You are here and you areexactly where you're meant to be
.
Notice the sensations in yourbody, the feeling of your feet
(01:19:08):
on the floor, your hands restinggently, the rhythm of your
breath.
Become fully present here andnow.
Now I invite you to let go ofany emotions that no longer
(01:19:30):
serve you.
Imagine them gently meltingaway with each Exhale, with each
inhale.
(01:19:50):
Welcome in the emotions youwant to expand.
Welcome in the emotions youwant to expand.
Welcome in peace.
Welcome in clarity.
(01:20:13):
Welcome in confidence.
Welcome in self-love.
Welcome in self-love.
Welcome in respect.
Welcome in becomingauthentically you.
(01:20:38):
This moment is about steppinginto your power, reconnecting
with your authentic self andcarrying the transformation
you've experienced today intothe life that you're creating.
I want you to imagine yourselfstanding in front of a door.
(01:21:00):
This door represents thebarriers that have been holding
you back.
Take a deep breath and, as youexhale, feel yourself letting go
(01:21:23):
of any fear or hesitation.
Now visualize yourself openingthe door and stepping through it
.
On the other side is theversion of you who is free,
authentic and empowered.
Free, authentic and empowered.
That version of you is waitingfor you with open arms and, as
(01:21:49):
you step into this space, feelthe lightness in your body, the
clarity in your mind, in thestrength, the love in your heart
.
You are safe, you are whole,you are enough.
(01:22:17):
So repeat, silently or out loudI release what no longer serves
me.
I release what no longer servesme.
I release what no longer servesme.
(01:22:41):
I reclaim my voice.
I reclaim my voice.
I reclaim my voice.
I reclaim my worth.
I reclaim my word.
I reclaim my word.
(01:23:06):
I am worthy of peace, love andjoy.
I am worthy of peace, love andjoy.
I am worthy of peace, love andjoy.
(01:23:32):
I love who I am.
I love who I am.
I love who I am becoming.
I love me.
I am stepping into the life Iwas made for.
(01:24:08):
Now, take a moment to reflect onhow you feel in this space.
Notice the emotions, thesensations, the imagery that's
present.
Allow them to settle into yourheart and mind, solidifying the
(01:24:30):
transformation you'veexperienced today.
Now, decide now to carry thissense of peace, empowerment and
clarity with you, not just fortoday, but for the days to come.
You have the power to choosehow you show up in your life.
(01:24:55):
You have the power to choosehow to show up in your life.
You have the power to choosehow to show up in your life.
Now, gently bring your In, out,in out.
(01:25:28):
Feel the rise and fall of yourchest, the weight of your body
in the room around you, begin towiggle your fingers, your toes,
slowly bringing movement backinto your body, and, when you're
(01:25:50):
ready, open your eyes, take amoment to look around and notice
your environment and welcomeyourself back to full
consciousness, fully aware ofyourself and your surroundings.
(01:26:10):
How was that for you?
Send me a DM Comment on thevideo.
I love talking to y'all.
Like I said, if I don't see itand my va sees it, she lets me
know.
So, hey, and I respond back.
As someone asked me before, doyou respond back?
(01:26:33):
Yeah, I respond back.
Sometimes it's not like thesame day, but I I respond back
as soon as possible.
Usually it is the same day,sometimes it's very quick,
sometimes it's not like the sameday, but I respond back as soon
as possible.
Usually it is the same day,sometimes it's very quick,
sometimes it really depends onwhat it is Okay.
So thank you for showing up foryourself tonight, and the person
(01:26:59):
that you're becoming is alreadywithin you.
You're not broken.
You are whole or you'rebecoming whole, and you can do
this.
I'm with you, and that personinside is waiting for you to
(01:27:21):
continue this journey.
So take action, take empoweredaction, implement.
And as you leave this space,remember you are worthy of peace
, clarity, respect, love and joy.
You are stepping into the lifeyou were made for and I am here
(01:27:48):
to walk this journey with you,this empowered transformational
healing journey with you.
And if you're ready to take thenext step, remember crystaljcom
(01:28:09):
forward slash sneak peek forthat free two week access to
module one or DM breakthrough,and let's get you started in the
six month all inclusive program.
And if you don't want DMEbreakthrough, go straight to the
website crystaljcom forwardslash breakthrough and join.
Okay, let's continue thisjourney together.
Good night,
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