July 23, 2025 • 32 mins
Hailey Kay Aamodt was born of goodly parents, Jeremiah and Julie Bradfield. She was raised in a military family as the oldest of three children. Her mother home-schooled her through middle school and raised her to be kind and compassionate. Her father served in the Army and passed on his sense of humor, teaching her to be steadfast. As a child, Hailey enjoyed swing dancing, singing, learning new things, playing outside, and doing anything with horses, as well as playing her instruments.
Hailey served a full-time mission at the Mesa Arizona Temple Visitors Center and served as a specialist in the Family History Library. Hailey served in Spanish, English, and American Sign Language. Hailey was able to serve at many events hosted in Mesa, including the Mesa Arizona Temple open house, the Mesa Pageant, and the Mesa Temple Christmas Nativity Lights Production. Hailey returned home with a stronger and closer connection and understanding of God's pure love for her and all of His Children.
While attending school to get a Master of Massage Therapy with a Medical Emphasis, Hailey met her husband, Brent, at a family ward event in Valley Center, Kansas. They became good friends and were eventually married a year and a half later. They were married on June 28th, 2024, and were sealed in the Kansas City, Missouri Temple the next morning on June 29th, 2024.Her hobbies include, but are not limited to, continued study of Spanish and American Sign Language, singing, putting puzzles together, playing her instruments, and playing with Penny (her and Brent's dog), and singing along to all her favorite Disney movies.
Hailey has served in many capacities for the Church. Hailey currently serves in the Stake Relief Society as 1st Counselor. Her past callings include Ward and Stake Temple and Family History Consultant, Young Women's President of multiple classes, and Counselor in the Young Women's Presidency, Family History Specialist, 1st Counselor in the Ward Relief Society. Her favorite calling is serving as a Ministering Sister.
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Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Hi friends, welcome to the Wichita, KS State Podcast.
I'm your host, Paul Kitchen, a state history specialist.
This podcast is intended to helpbring followers of Christ closer
to him and to promote unity within the body of Christ by
listening to our state leaders share their personal stories of
faith. By reflecting on faith promoting
experiences, we can strengthen our individual faith in Jesus
(00:20):
Christ together. Welcome to our next episode, I'm
here with sister Haley K Amit. She was born of goodly parents,
Jeremiah and Julie Bradfield. She was raised in the military
family as the oldest of three children.
Her mother homeschooled her through middle school and raised
her to be kind and compassionate.
Her father served in the Army and passed on his sense of
(00:43):
humor, teaching her to be steadfast.
As a child, Haley enjoyed swing dancing, singing, learning new
things, playing outside, and doing anything with horses as
well as playing her instruments.Haley served a full time mission
at the Mesa AZ Temple Visitor Center and served as a
specialist in the Family HistoryLibrary.
(01:04):
Haley served in Spanish, English, and American Sign
Language. Haley was able to serve at many
events hosted in Mesa including the Mesa AZ Temple Open House,
the Mesa Pageant, and the Mesa Temple Christmas Nativity Lights
production. Haley returned home with a
stronger and closer connection and understanding of God's pure
love for her and all of His children.
(01:26):
While attending school to get a Master of Massage Therapy with a
medical emphasis, Haley met her husband Brent at a family ward
event in Valley Center, KS. They became good friends and
were eventually married a year and a half later.
They were married on June 28th, 2024 and were sealed in the
Kansas City, MO temple the next morning on June 29th, 2024.
(01:51):
Her hobbies include but are not limited to, continued study of
Spanish and American Sign Language, singing, putting
puzzles together, playing her instruments and playing with
Penny, her and Brent's dog, and singing along to all her
favorite Disney movies. Haley has served in many
capacities for the church. Haley currently serves in the
(02:11):
State Relief Society as first counselor for.
Past callings include Ward and state Temple and family history
consultant, Young Women's President of multiple classes
and counselor in the Young Women's presidency, family
history specialist, first counselor in the ward Relief
Society. Our favorite calling is serving
as a ministering sister. Welcome, Haley.
(02:34):
Thank you. Glad to be with you.
This is exciting. So let's let's start with just
having you share experiences that have helped bring you
closer to Christ. Well, I think so.
My parents were awesome and theyraised me in the in the gospel,
(02:54):
and they taught me very well about the love of Jesus Christ
and of Heavenly Father. And even from a young age, there
were seemingly so many things that went on in my life.
My dad was in the Army, he is anArmy and he, by the time I was
(03:16):
16, was deployed for more than half of my life and he was gone
a lot. So that was very difficult for
my mom having to raise us seemingly alone and try and
homeschool all of us kids, even though we weren't, we weren't
the easiest to teach as sometimes rebellious children
(03:41):
sometimes. Anyways, it was hard to see my
mom go through missing my dad and and of course, all of us
missing our our dad and having him far away.
And I think when I started to really, really look toward the
(04:03):
savior was through those times. And then in high school, I, I
was involved in everything. I absolutely loved.
I loved theatre, I loved acting and I competed and I was in
multiple sports. I was also in marching band.
(04:25):
I play several instruments and Iwas involved in everything and I
was seemingly really popular andI was like wow, public school is
the coolest and and made my sophomore year life really took
a turn for me and I I got a veryrare diagnosis.
(04:49):
So I have depression and anxiety, but I have a very rare
form of anxiety. My body doesn't process cortisol
at all. The receptors don't disperse it
and it causes a semi paralysis. So it's paralytic anxiety and it
causes specifically the lower half of my body to lose proper
(05:14):
function. And I didn't know this at the
time. And so I was playing sports and
doing all these things and competing in marching band
competitions and dancing for oneacts and musicals at my school.
And I, I noticed that it became,it started to become painful to
(05:37):
walk and like my, my joints, especially on my lower body,
became very difficult to, to almost move.
And I, I've been telling my mom about it and my dad and, and it
was, it was actually one night Iwas walking up the stairs in my
house and I collapsed and I actually, I actually fell down
(06:03):
the stairs and my dad ran down and like pick me up and we
inspected my, my legs and nothing seemed to be amiss.
Nothing, no discoloration, no swelling, no, no pain or tender
to tenderness whenever he moved my limbs, just when I moved
them. And it was, it was very strange.
(06:23):
And that led to a lot of a lot of doctors visits, scans, X-rays
and nothing seemed to be wrong with me.
And we started looking into neurologists thinking maybe it
was in my mind. And it took almost 2 years to
(06:46):
finally figure out that I neededanxiety medicine.
And as crazy as it sounds, within a few months of taking my
anxiety medicine, I was already becoming better and stronger.
And it had taken so long to findthe diagnosis it.
(07:06):
We went to specialists and and did imaging and nothing.
No one, everywhere we went, physical therapists, no one
understood what was going on. And I even saw massage
therapists and they couldn't explain it either.
And no one knew what was going on with me in it.
It seemed like no one understoodwhat it's like.
(07:29):
And as a high school student whoused to do everything, losing
all of my sports and dancing andlike as a youth, like all the
activities are surrounded by around physical activity, sports
and, and church dances, like I, I missed all those things.
(07:51):
I went, I went to them, but I wouldn't be able to participate.
And it was very lonesome. And I mean, I was already the
new kid. I moved so much and I was
already new and different which I for the most part was fine
(08:15):
with, but seeming to not be ableto bond with people over
anything other than words was hard.
And during this time of, of trying to figure out what was
wrong with me, I, I taught myself sign language.
(08:39):
I had missed dancing so much andI missed moving and running that
I wanted to dance with instead of my feet.
I could dance with my hands withwords.
And sign language became something that helped me through
so much. I would go to all the activities
(09:00):
and especially church dances andI would while everyone was
dancing around me. I mean, it didn't make it all
better. It still sucked, but being able
to put all my emotion and enjoyment into the signs that I
was signing, that it, it made mefeel more included in that I
(09:23):
was, I don't know, still capable, I guess.
And then one of the most devastating parts of it is from
the time I was 11, I had been preparing to be a missionary.
I wanted to be a missionary so bad and I, I had looked forward
to it for so long. And even from the time I was 11,
(09:44):
I would eat the nastiest things,like I'm talking nasty like my
brother and I, we would just torture each other.
We would play this game. We would call it what's in my
mouth. And we would blindfold each
other and make the strangest, nastiest concoctions and
including dog food and dog treats like, and most of the
(10:08):
time we got it down. There were a few times it came
up instead, But my brother and I, we enjoyed that.
And, and, and of course, I, I did studying of the gospel.
I did preach my gospel studies or, and I, I wanted to be a
missionary so bad. And I wanted, I wanted to teach
(10:29):
people the gospel. I love teaching.
And I didn't think that it was going to be possible for me to
serve a mission. And that was devastating.
And when I was 18, I was like 150 days before I turn 19, I can
submit my mission papers. So 150 days before before I turn
(10:51):
19, I submitted my mission papers and they got sent right
back. And I, I was devastated.
I Yeah, I was like, I have to serve a mission.
At this point in time, I had just barely been recovering,
having found out that the whole time it was anxiety causing all
(11:16):
these problems for me. I I remember the day that I was
able to walk a mile for the first time.
It was an excruciating process, and it took me a long time, but
I walked a mile and I wanted to get back up to walking great
(11:38):
distances because I wanted to serve a mission.
And I practice. And it.
Isn't it crazy to sound like practicing walking at 18?
Yeah. And it was incredibly difficult,
but I didn't give up. I said I am going to serve a
mission. And I was praying to Heavenly
(11:58):
Father that please let me serve a mission.
I just want to serve. I'll go anywhere you want.
And I was like, I am happy to serve outside the country, in
America, anywhere you want. And I, I had to see specialists
(12:21):
before I had to send them in my pen, my papers again, I had to
see a cardiologist because of a minor heart condition that I
have. And then it's a mitral valve
prolapse, which it will probablynever negatively affect me.
And then I had to see a neurologist.
(12:44):
I had to see a couple different other specialists for joints,
and I had to see a physical therapist for evaluation.
And I also had to see a church therapist to evaluate my
emotional and mental state. And I sent it in again.
(13:04):
And I was like, I'm going to be able to serve a mission.
Everything was cleared, but my papers got sent back again for a
second time. And I was like, are you kidding
me? I've done everything.
And I sent them in a third time.And and it was at I was in
(13:28):
college. I was doing a semester of
college and I submitted it againand I said I will serve a
mission. I want to serve a mission.
And the third time I received a mission call.
Now, when I wanted a mission, I wanted to serve anywhere, be
happy with anything. There were four things that I
(13:49):
had wanted in a mission. I wanted somewhere where it
never snowed, 'cause I do not like the cold.
And I wanted somewhere in the United States so I could use
American Sign Language. I wanted somewhere Spanish
speaking so that I could be trilingual.
And I wanted to serve near a temple so that I could see it on
(14:12):
my mission. And I got called to the Mesa, AZ
Temple visitor center. And after all this time of
waiting, I was so excited to serve.
And it felt like Heavenly Fatherhad rewarded me for waiting so
long and for struggling for so long and not giving up hope on
(14:35):
the mission. And it felt like whenever I
opened that mission call, it waslike like Heavenly Father gave
me the most beautifully declarated cake and he and he
presents it to me. And I was so grateful for it.
It was like everything I had dreamed of.
(14:58):
I was so excited and I was, I started studying Spanish because
I got called Spanish speaking and I got, I started studying
Spanish and I did all the pre MTC, which is like pre mission
training center, all of that. And of course it was during
COVID. So I didn't go in to the
training center. I just did it from my house and
(15:21):
I was so excited. I was preparing and preparing,
and I was so grateful that I wasable to serve a mission.
And then I got to my mission so excited, ready to hit the ground
running. And then I came to the
realization, the startling reality that sisters aren't
(15:46):
always perfect. I had this expectation that
sisters were going to be so kindand compassionate and Christ
like and they were all ready to serve and share the gospel with
people and and and teach about Jesus Christ.
And it was really difficult. I had several companions.
(16:13):
I served for 17 1/2 months and in that time I had 22 companions
and I did have some trios but most of them were just me and
one other girl and and on. As time went by I thought the
next ones, my next companion will be will be good.
(16:37):
They'll want to serve just like I do, and they'll be kind.
And then one after the other seemingly got worse and worse.
I had companion. I had a companion who was
physically abusive. I had several who were very
emotionally and verbally manipulative and abusive and who
(17:02):
would insult me spiritually. And in my time in high school,
the gospel was all I had. I was causing my parents so many
medical bills, so much money, and they were happy to do it for
(17:25):
me, but it felt as though I was a burden, that I had nothing, no
reason to be here other than to cause my parents money.
And I would pray, as awful as itsounds, that if the Lord did not
need me here, that he'd Take Me Home.
(17:49):
And I would pray this nearly every night in high school.
And I stuck around. I'm still here.
And and to have my spiritual integrity insult was the worst
(18:10):
wound that could have been dealt.
And it was devastating to be told my testimony wasn't strong
enough. Why am I even on a mission?
Like why would the Savior want me to serve for him?
(18:31):
I had some awful companions. And just because sisters don't
have to serve doesn't mean they're they're for the right
reasons. Some sisters parents forced them
to go on missions. Some sisters are doing it to
save face. Some think it's cool and their
parents are paying for it and it's a time to have fun.
(18:54):
And some like the gospel and even love it but just lose sight
of it. I did have a few good
companions, but I got so many hard companions, one after
another after another and I started to wonder, are any of
(19:15):
them good? And, and I remember there was
one specific companion. It was absolutely awful,
controlling in every way of the word and she was I.
(19:48):
As crazy as it sounds, I remember it being awful, but I
don't remember many things that happened.
It is as if my mind has blocked the memories.
But I do remember one day. I was in Mesa, AZ when I was
serving. It was the third smallest in in
(20:10):
the world and it was about 30 minutes across and so as remote
as you can get within that in the desert.
It was about a two mile walk to the next house and it was just
red desert everywhere. And I remember waking up one day
(20:33):
and she was gone, had taken the car and the phone and had left
me. And being a missionary, you're
not supposed to be without a companion.
You're supposed to have someone insight and sound at all times.
(20:56):
I've never been good at being alone.
I'm very much bad at it actually.
But in that moment I have never felt so alone.
No way to contact another personcompletely alone.
(21:18):
It felt like I was alone in every sense of the word.
I had begun to get so depressed that it was hard for me to feel
anything. And I remember being so
physically alone and so emotionally mentally alone.
(21:44):
And I had nothing else to do with them to turn to the
scriptures. And I remember reading in Rosiah
where it talks about the people turned their tents to face the
temple. And reading those verses struck
(22:07):
me at that time, and then I began to think of the Saviour.
And I know, I know that people have had it worse than I, and I
know that the Saviour imagine experienced more than I can even
fathom. But in that moment, I understood
(22:31):
to the tiniest fraction of the matter.
What the Saviour felt like when he felt he was alone, completely
alone. So that perfect mission that I
(22:59):
thought I had received perfectlydecorated had turned out to be
rotten, and I felt like I had been abandoned.
(23:20):
And I knew that the Savior had done that and so much more for
me, and that He loved each of usso much that He would do it all
over again if it meant saving but one soul.
(23:52):
May I would imagine how much theSaviour must care for me.
And some people might think I'm crazy for still loving the
(24:16):
gospel so much after all that's happened and having such a
terrible experience with my mission.
But it helped me realize that even though I had every reason
to go home, I stayed because I love Jesus Christ.
(24:46):
And having him in my life and knowing what he's done for me is
worth every try. Anyway, did you have a next
question? Well, that was wonderful.
I just want to thank you for being so vulnerable, open with
(25:09):
us. Be willing to share the
difficult experiences in your life that, that come to your
mind when you think about the, the times that the experiences
that you've had that have brought you closer to the
savior. It's, it's not always the the
happiest times, right? We, we feel him the most when we
(25:32):
need him the most. Thank you so much for sharing.
So my my next question is, what's your favorite gospel
study? So on my mission, I I studied a
lot. I was at the temple visitor
(25:52):
center. And so whenever there was
downtime, we would study lessonsand study the scriptures.
We would do family history. And I found that studying the
Savior in the Book of Mormon, I have highlighted almost every
single page where it talks aboutJesus Christ or lists an
(26:16):
attribute that he portrays that he has.
And it was incredible to see howmuch grace that the Savior has
while maintaining justice because mercy and justice cannot
exist without each other. And I, I went through and I
(26:41):
highlighted every time it mentioned to God and Jesus
Christ and the Holy Spirit. And I highlighted in different
colors all the attributes of Jesus Christ that I, and it's
incredible to see how colorful my, my Book of Mormon is.
(27:02):
And I I specifically looked for faith, hope, joy, charity,
justice, virtue, knowledge, patience, humility and meekness,
diligence, power, obedience, submission, grace and mercy.
(27:23):
And it was astounding to not only in my experiences, like
have to need him so much and feel his love, but I felt like I
learned who he was, that I wouldrecognize him by his word alone.
(27:49):
That was my favorite study. That's a wonderful set of Book
of Mormon markings that you havethere, that they're so colorful.
It's not all one color. They all have, as you said, the
different attributes. Standing out playing helps you
(28:11):
remember that time that you werefed you.
Thank you. What do you wish more people
would know or understand about God and Jesus Christ?
One thing that I wish more people understood and knew about
Jesus Christ and our Heavenly Father is how much grace plays a
(28:34):
role in our lives. Grace is my absolute favorite
topic to talk about because we all know the scripture and that
it talks about. We are saved after all that we
can do and but we are not specifically saved because of
all we can do. It's after all we do We don't.
(28:58):
Heavenly Father doesn't expect us to be perfect.
Jesus Christ has never worked with perfect servant.
All He wants is that we do our best, and He wants us to know
that He loves us despite our mistakes and He loves us enough
(29:22):
to correct us because he he wants better for us and He
expects more of us because He loves us.
It is because He loves us that He gives us guidelines, and it's
because He loves us that He's with us every step of the way.
(29:45):
Even when we cannot see or feel him, He's there, reaching out
His hand, waiting for us to takeit.
Everybody would be better off knowing that.
It's wonderful. I've really enjoyed our our time
here together. Will you close our episode with
(30:09):
sharing your testimony of Jesus Christ and of His restored
church? Yes, I know that the Savior
knows and loves each of us and that just like in the process of
(30:31):
making silver, we have to be putinto the hottest part of the
flight. And it isn't until He can see
His reflection in US that the silver is purified.
And I know that the Savior put me in the fire so that He could
(30:57):
see Himself in me. I'm so grateful that He loves me
enough to make me better, even as much as it hurts.
I have become more compassionateand I know that it is the
Saviours doing working in my life.
(31:21):
I know that we can learn of Him and listen to His words by
listening to the scriptures, theBook of Mormon in the Bible,
especially the New Testament. I love the New Testament and by
listening to prophets and apostles.
(31:42):
Because God has not forsaken us.I know that He still speaks to
us and we can receive personal revelation.
I know that the Saviour has felteverything we ever will
experience, ever have experienced and everything we
are experiencing. And if even if it feels like
you're completely alone, he's with you.
(32:09):
I know, I know these things and I felt them and studied them for
myself. And I say that in the name of
Jesus Christ, Amen. Amen.
I hope that this episode of The Witch Took is a Stick podcast
helped bring you closer to Christ.
I invite you to take some time today to write about Oregon
Record, one of your own faith promoting experiences.
Hi friends, welcome to the Wichita, KS State Podcast.
I'm your host, Paul Kitchen, a state history specialist.
This podcast is intended to helpbring followers of Christ closer
to him and to promote unity within the body of Christ by
listening to our state leaders share their personal stories of
faith. By reflecting on faith promoting
experiences, we can strengthen our individual faith in Jesus
(00:20):
Christ together. Welcome to our next episode, I'm
here with sister Haley K Amit. She was born of goodly parents,
Jeremiah and Julie Bradfield. She was raised in the military
family as the oldest of three children.
Her mother homeschooled her through middle school and raised
her to be kind and compassionate.
Her father served in the Army and passed on his sense of
(00:43):
humor, teaching her to be steadfast.
As a child, Haley enjoyed swing dancing, singing, learning new
things, playing outside, and doing anything with horses as
well as playing her instruments.Haley served a full time mission
at the Mesa AZ Temple Visitor Center and served as a
specialist in the Family HistoryLibrary.
(01:04):
Haley served in Spanish, English, and American Sign
Language. Haley was able to serve at many
events hosted in Mesa including the Mesa AZ Temple Open House,
the Mesa Pageant, and the Mesa Temple Christmas Nativity Lights
production. Haley returned home with a
stronger and closer connection and understanding of God's pure
love for her and all of His children.
(01:26):
While attending school to get a Master of Massage Therapy with a
medical emphasis, Haley met her husband Brent at a family ward
event in Valley Center, KS. They became good friends and
were eventually married a year and a half later.
They were married on June 28th, 2024 and were sealed in the
Kansas City, MO temple the next morning on June 29th, 2024.
(01:51):
Her hobbies include but are not limited to, continued study of
Spanish and American Sign Language, singing, putting
puzzles together, playing her instruments and playing with
Penny, her and Brent's dog, and singing along to all her
favorite Disney movies. Haley has served in many
capacities for the church. Haley currently serves in the
(02:11):
State Relief Society as first counselor for.
Past callings include Ward and state Temple and family history
consultant, Young Women's President of multiple classes
and counselor in the Young Women's presidency, family
history specialist, first counselor in the ward Relief
Society. Our favorite calling is serving
as a ministering sister. Welcome, Haley.
(02:34):
Thank you. Glad to be with you.
This is exciting. So let's let's start with just
having you share experiences that have helped bring you
closer to Christ. Well, I think so.
My parents were awesome and theyraised me in the in the gospel,
(02:54):
and they taught me very well about the love of Jesus Christ
and of Heavenly Father. And even from a young age, there
were seemingly so many things that went on in my life.
My dad was in the Army, he is anArmy and he, by the time I was
(03:16):
16, was deployed for more than half of my life and he was gone
a lot. So that was very difficult for
my mom having to raise us seemingly alone and try and
homeschool all of us kids, even though we weren't, we weren't
the easiest to teach as sometimes rebellious children
(03:41):
sometimes. Anyways, it was hard to see my
mom go through missing my dad and and of course, all of us
missing our our dad and having him far away.
And I think when I started to really, really look toward the
(04:03):
savior was through those times. And then in high school, I, I
was involved in everything. I absolutely loved.
I loved theatre, I loved acting and I competed and I was in
multiple sports. I was also in marching band.
(04:25):
I play several instruments and Iwas involved in everything and I
was seemingly really popular andI was like wow, public school is
the coolest and and made my sophomore year life really took
a turn for me and I I got a veryrare diagnosis.
(04:49):
So I have depression and anxiety, but I have a very rare
form of anxiety. My body doesn't process cortisol
at all. The receptors don't disperse it
and it causes a semi paralysis. So it's paralytic anxiety and it
causes specifically the lower half of my body to lose proper
(05:14):
function. And I didn't know this at the
time. And so I was playing sports and
doing all these things and competing in marching band
competitions and dancing for oneacts and musicals at my school.
And I, I noticed that it became,it started to become painful to
(05:37):
walk and like my, my joints, especially on my lower body,
became very difficult to, to almost move.
And I, I've been telling my mom about it and my dad and, and it
was, it was actually one night Iwas walking up the stairs in my
house and I collapsed and I actually, I actually fell down
(06:03):
the stairs and my dad ran down and like pick me up and we
inspected my, my legs and nothing seemed to be amiss.
Nothing, no discoloration, no swelling, no, no pain or tender
to tenderness whenever he moved my limbs, just when I moved
them. And it was, it was very strange.
(06:23):
And that led to a lot of a lot of doctors visits, scans, X-rays
and nothing seemed to be wrong with me.
And we started looking into neurologists thinking maybe it
was in my mind. And it took almost 2 years to
(06:46):
finally figure out that I neededanxiety medicine.
And as crazy as it sounds, within a few months of taking my
anxiety medicine, I was already becoming better and stronger.
And it had taken so long to findthe diagnosis it.
(07:06):
We went to specialists and and did imaging and nothing.
No one, everywhere we went, physical therapists, no one
understood what was going on. And I even saw massage
therapists and they couldn't explain it either.
And no one knew what was going on with me in it.
It seemed like no one understoodwhat it's like.
(07:29):
And as a high school student whoused to do everything, losing
all of my sports and dancing andlike as a youth, like all the
activities are surrounded by around physical activity, sports
and, and church dances, like I, I missed all those things.
(07:51):
I went, I went to them, but I wouldn't be able to participate.
And it was very lonesome. And I mean, I was already the
new kid. I moved so much and I was
already new and different which I for the most part was fine
(08:15):
with, but seeming to not be ableto bond with people over
anything other than words was hard.
And during this time of, of trying to figure out what was
wrong with me, I, I taught myself sign language.
(08:39):
I had missed dancing so much andI missed moving and running that
I wanted to dance with instead of my feet.
I could dance with my hands withwords.
And sign language became something that helped me through
so much. I would go to all the activities
(09:00):
and especially church dances andI would while everyone was
dancing around me. I mean, it didn't make it all
better. It still sucked, but being able
to put all my emotion and enjoyment into the signs that I
was signing, that it, it made mefeel more included in that I
(09:23):
was, I don't know, still capable, I guess.
And then one of the most devastating parts of it is from
the time I was 11, I had been preparing to be a missionary.
I wanted to be a missionary so bad and I, I had looked forward
to it for so long. And even from the time I was 11,
(09:44):
I would eat the nastiest things,like I'm talking nasty like my
brother and I, we would just torture each other.
We would play this game. We would call it what's in my
mouth. And we would blindfold each
other and make the strangest, nastiest concoctions and
including dog food and dog treats like, and most of the
(10:08):
time we got it down. There were a few times it came
up instead, But my brother and I, we enjoyed that.
And, and, and of course, I, I did studying of the gospel.
I did preach my gospel studies or, and I, I wanted to be a
missionary so bad. And I wanted, I wanted to teach
(10:29):
people the gospel. I love teaching.
And I didn't think that it was going to be possible for me to
serve a mission. And that was devastating.
And when I was 18, I was like 150 days before I turn 19, I can
submit my mission papers. So 150 days before before I turn
(10:51):
19, I submitted my mission papers and they got sent right
back. And I, I was devastated.
I Yeah, I was like, I have to serve a mission.
At this point in time, I had just barely been recovering,
having found out that the whole time it was anxiety causing all
(11:16):
these problems for me. I I remember the day that I was
able to walk a mile for the first time.
It was an excruciating process, and it took me a long time, but
I walked a mile and I wanted to get back up to walking great
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distances because I wanted to serve a mission.
And I practice. And it.
Isn't it crazy to sound like practicing walking at 18?
Yeah. And it was incredibly difficult,
but I didn't give up. I said I am going to serve a
mission. And I was praying to Heavenly
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Father that please let me serve a mission.
I just want to serve. I'll go anywhere you want.
And I was like, I am happy to serve outside the country, in
America, anywhere you want. And I, I had to see specialists
(12:21):
before I had to send them in my pen, my papers again, I had to
see a cardiologist because of a minor heart condition that I
have. And then it's a mitral valve
prolapse, which it will probablynever negatively affect me.
And then I had to see a neurologist.
(12:44):
I had to see a couple different other specialists for joints,
and I had to see a physical therapist for evaluation.
And I also had to see a church therapist to evaluate my
emotional and mental state. And I sent it in again.
(13:04):
And I was like, I'm going to be able to serve a mission.
Everything was cleared, but my papers got sent back again for a
second time. And I was like, are you kidding
me? I've done everything.
And I sent them in a third time.And and it was at I was in
(13:28):
college. I was doing a semester of
college and I submitted it againand I said I will serve a
mission. I want to serve a mission.
And the third time I received a mission call.
Now, when I wanted a mission, I wanted to serve anywhere, be
happy with anything. There were four things that I
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had wanted in a mission. I wanted somewhere where it
never snowed, 'cause I do not like the cold.
And I wanted somewhere in the United States so I could use
American Sign Language. I wanted somewhere Spanish
speaking so that I could be trilingual.
And I wanted to serve near a temple so that I could see it on
(14:12):
my mission. And I got called to the Mesa, AZ
Temple visitor center. And after all this time of
waiting, I was so excited to serve.
And it felt like Heavenly Fatherhad rewarded me for waiting so
long and for struggling for so long and not giving up hope on
(14:35):
the mission. And it felt like whenever I
opened that mission call, it waslike like Heavenly Father gave
me the most beautifully declarated cake and he and he
presents it to me. And I was so grateful for it.
It was like everything I had dreamed of.
(14:58):
I was so excited and I was, I started studying Spanish because
I got called Spanish speaking and I got, I started studying
Spanish and I did all the pre MTC, which is like pre mission
training center, all of that. And of course it was during
COVID. So I didn't go in to the
training center. I just did it from my house and
(15:21):
I was so excited. I was preparing and preparing,
and I was so grateful that I wasable to serve a mission.
And then I got to my mission so excited, ready to hit the ground
running. And then I came to the
realization, the startling reality that sisters aren't
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always perfect. I had this expectation that
sisters were going to be so kindand compassionate and Christ
like and they were all ready to serve and share the gospel with
people and and and teach about Jesus Christ.
And it was really difficult. I had several companions.
(16:13):
I served for 17 1/2 months and in that time I had 22 companions
and I did have some trios but most of them were just me and
one other girl and and on. As time went by I thought the
next ones, my next companion will be will be good.
(16:37):
They'll want to serve just like I do, and they'll be kind.
And then one after the other seemingly got worse and worse.
I had companion. I had a companion who was
physically abusive. I had several who were very
emotionally and verbally manipulative and abusive and who
(17:02):
would insult me spiritually. And in my time in high school,
the gospel was all I had. I was causing my parents so many
medical bills, so much money, and they were happy to do it for
(17:25):
me, but it felt as though I was a burden, that I had nothing, no
reason to be here other than to cause my parents money.
And I would pray, as awful as itsounds, that if the Lord did not
need me here, that he'd Take Me Home.
(17:49):
And I would pray this nearly every night in high school.
And I stuck around. I'm still here.
And and to have my spiritual integrity insult was the worst
(18:10):
wound that could have been dealt.
And it was devastating to be told my testimony wasn't strong
enough. Why am I even on a mission?
Like why would the Savior want me to serve for him?
(18:31):
I had some awful companions. And just because sisters don't
have to serve doesn't mean they're they're for the right
reasons. Some sisters parents forced them
to go on missions. Some sisters are doing it to
save face. Some think it's cool and their
parents are paying for it and it's a time to have fun.
(18:54):
And some like the gospel and even love it but just lose sight
of it. I did have a few good
companions, but I got so many hard companions, one after
another after another and I started to wonder, are any of
(19:15):
them good? And, and I remember there was
one specific companion. It was absolutely awful,
controlling in every way of the word and she was I.
(19:48):
As crazy as it sounds, I remember it being awful, but I
don't remember many things that happened.
It is as if my mind has blocked the memories.
But I do remember one day. I was in Mesa, AZ when I was
serving. It was the third smallest in in
(20:10):
the world and it was about 30 minutes across and so as remote
as you can get within that in the desert.
It was about a two mile walk to the next house and it was just
red desert everywhere. And I remember waking up one day
(20:33):
and she was gone, had taken the car and the phone and had left
me. And being a missionary, you're
not supposed to be without a companion.
You're supposed to have someone insight and sound at all times.
(20:56):
I've never been good at being alone.
I'm very much bad at it actually.
But in that moment I have never felt so alone.
No way to contact another personcompletely alone.
(21:18):
It felt like I was alone in every sense of the word.
I had begun to get so depressed that it was hard for me to feel
anything. And I remember being so
physically alone and so emotionally mentally alone.
(21:44):
And I had nothing else to do with them to turn to the
scriptures. And I remember reading in Rosiah
where it talks about the people turned their tents to face the
temple. And reading those verses struck
(22:07):
me at that time, and then I began to think of the Saviour.
And I know, I know that people have had it worse than I, and I
know that the Saviour imagine experienced more than I can even
fathom. But in that moment, I understood
(22:31):
to the tiniest fraction of the matter.
What the Saviour felt like when he felt he was alone, completely
alone. So that perfect mission that I
(22:59):
thought I had received perfectlydecorated had turned out to be
rotten, and I felt like I had been abandoned.
(23:20):
And I knew that the Savior had done that and so much more for
me, and that He loved each of usso much that He would do it all
over again if it meant saving but one soul.
(23:52):
May I would imagine how much theSaviour must care for me.
And some people might think I'm crazy for still loving the
(24:16):
gospel so much after all that's happened and having such a
terrible experience with my mission.
But it helped me realize that even though I had every reason
to go home, I stayed because I love Jesus Christ.
(24:46):
And having him in my life and knowing what he's done for me is
worth every try. Anyway, did you have a next
question? Well, that was wonderful.
I just want to thank you for being so vulnerable, open with
(25:09):
us. Be willing to share the
difficult experiences in your life that, that come to your
mind when you think about the, the times that the experiences
that you've had that have brought you closer to the
savior. It's, it's not always the the
happiest times, right? We, we feel him the most when we
(25:32):
need him the most. Thank you so much for sharing.
So my my next question is, what's your favorite gospel
study? So on my mission, I I studied a
lot. I was at the temple visitor
(25:52):
center. And so whenever there was
downtime, we would study lessonsand study the scriptures.
We would do family history. And I found that studying the
Savior in the Book of Mormon, I have highlighted almost every
single page where it talks aboutJesus Christ or lists an
(26:16):
attribute that he portrays that he has.
And it was incredible to see howmuch grace that the Savior has
while maintaining justice because mercy and justice cannot
exist without each other. And I, I went through and I
(26:41):
highlighted every time it mentioned to God and Jesus
Christ and the Holy Spirit. And I highlighted in different
colors all the attributes of Jesus Christ that I, and it's
incredible to see how colorful my, my Book of Mormon is.
(27:02):
And I I specifically looked for faith, hope, joy, charity,
justice, virtue, knowledge, patience, humility and meekness,
diligence, power, obedience, submission, grace and mercy.
(27:23):
And it was astounding to not only in my experiences, like
have to need him so much and feel his love, but I felt like I
learned who he was, that I wouldrecognize him by his word alone.
(27:49):
That was my favorite study. That's a wonderful set of Book
of Mormon markings that you havethere, that they're so colorful.
It's not all one color. They all have, as you said, the
different attributes. Standing out playing helps you
(28:11):
remember that time that you werefed you.
Thank you. What do you wish more people
would know or understand about God and Jesus Christ?
One thing that I wish more people understood and knew about
Jesus Christ and our Heavenly Father is how much grace plays a
(28:34):
role in our lives. Grace is my absolute favorite
topic to talk about because we all know the scripture and that
it talks about. We are saved after all that we
can do and but we are not specifically saved because of
all we can do. It's after all we do We don't.
(28:58):
Heavenly Father doesn't expect us to be perfect.
Jesus Christ has never worked with perfect servant.
All He wants is that we do our best, and He wants us to know
that He loves us despite our mistakes and He loves us enough
(29:22):
to correct us because he he wants better for us and He
expects more of us because He loves us.
It is because He loves us that He gives us guidelines, and it's
because He loves us that He's with us every step of the way.
(29:45):
Even when we cannot see or feel him, He's there, reaching out
His hand, waiting for us to takeit.
Everybody would be better off knowing that.
It's wonderful. I've really enjoyed our our time
here together. Will you close our episode with
(30:09):
sharing your testimony of Jesus Christ and of His restored
church? Yes, I know that the Savior
knows and loves each of us and that just like in the process of
(30:31):
making silver, we have to be putinto the hottest part of the
flight. And it isn't until He can see
His reflection in US that the silver is purified.
And I know that the Savior put me in the fire so that He could
(30:57):
see Himself in me. I'm so grateful that He loves me
enough to make me better, even as much as it hurts.
I have become more compassionateand I know that it is the
Saviours doing working in my life.
(31:21):
I know that we can learn of Him and listen to His words by
listening to the scriptures, theBook of Mormon in the Bible,
especially the New Testament. I love the New Testament and by
listening to prophets and apostles.
(31:42):
Because God has not forsaken us.I know that He still speaks to
us and we can receive personal revelation.
I know that the Saviour has felteverything we ever will
experience, ever have experienced and everything we
are experiencing. And if even if it feels like
you're completely alone, he's with you.
(32:09):
I know, I know these things and I felt them and studied them for
myself. And I say that in the name of
Jesus Christ, Amen. Amen.
I hope that this episode of The Witch Took is a Stick podcast
helped bring you closer to Christ.
I invite you to take some time today to write about Oregon
Record, one of your own faith promoting experiences.
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