Will You Survive "Cooties": When Recess Becomes a Nightmare

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We dive into the horror-comedy "Cooties" where a cafeteria food virus turns elementary school children into zombie-like infected creatures, forcing teachers to band together and fight for survival against their former students.

• Film stars Elijah Wood, Rainn Wilson, and Alison Pill as teachers trapped in a school with infected children
• The virus only fully "zombifies" pre-pubescent children while adults only get flu-like symptoms
• Transmission occurs through bites and scratches, mimicking how children spread "cooties" in playground games
• Strategic barricading was effective until the children accessed the ventilation system
• Characters showed impressive resourcefulness, creating weapons from everyday school items
• Water collection and non-perishable food items are top priorities in any apocalyptic scenario
• Initial phases of societal collapse would likely have abundant housing due to population reduction
• The group agrees to watch "Cast Away" for their next episode

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:27):
Hello, hello, survivors, and welcome to
another episode of Will youSurvive.

Speaker 2 (00:32):
The Podcast.

Speaker 1 (00:34):
In these episodes we like to talk about survival
situations, usually through thelens of cinema.
Today we watched the movieCooties, and I'm going to be
talking with my co-hosts herethroughout this episode.
I have Eric.

Speaker 3 (00:48):
Hello.

Speaker 1 (00:49):
And we also have TJ.

Speaker 3 (00:50):
I have a truck with dual rear wheels.
Dual rear wheels, dual rearwheels.

Speaker 1 (00:59):
It's a truck with two wheels.

Speaker 3 (01:05):
Dual rear wheels Okay .

Speaker 1 (01:07):
Dual rear, wheels Dual rear wheel.

Speaker 3 (01:09):
Okay, I don't even think you're faking it at this
point, he'll get it.
Dual rear wheel Dual rear yes.

Speaker 2 (01:19):
You got it, you had it, it was there.

Speaker 3 (01:23):
Dual rear wheel Just cut it?

Speaker 1 (01:23):
You had it, you lost it.
You got it.
It was there Dual rear wheels.
Just cut it.
You had it, you lost it.
You got it again.
All right, how long was that?
That was quite a ways, quite aways.
That was unbelievable.

Speaker 2 (01:41):
Dual rear wheels.
I drive a unicycle and themovie Unicycle.

Speaker 1 (01:56):
What are you talking about?

Speaker 2 (01:59):
I'm just making up.

Speaker 3 (02:04):
Instead of the dual rear wheel or whatever.

Speaker 1 (02:07):
This is the most coherent we've ever been on this
podcast.
Dual rear wheel.

Speaker 3 (02:12):
I can say it perfectly Dual rear wheels.

Speaker 1 (02:14):
But you know it is funny though that it was kind of
hard.
Once he did that, once hemessed it up, it was hard for me
to get it in my head even Itold Eric I was just going to do
that for like a minute, oh, ohwait, wait, oh my gosh, he
botched it completely, you guyscontinue, you guys continue.

Speaker 2 (02:37):
Uh-oh what?
Go ahead, keep it going.

Speaker 1 (02:40):
What Keep it going?
Okay, so, so handshake deal inthis movie.
Cooties is a horror comedy withunexpected laughs and
unapologetic thrills.
When a cafeteria food virusturns elementary school children
into killer zombies, a group ofmisfit teachers must band

(03:00):
together to escape theplayground carnage.
the film stars elijah wood, rainwilson that's frodo to you and
allison pill as teachers whofight to survive the mayhem
while hilariously bickering inan uncomfortable love triangle
on the worst monday of theirlives, which uh rain wilson for

(03:22):
those of you who are fans isdwight from the office.
Who?

Speaker 2 (03:27):
if they're fans.
I hope they didn't need you totell them I didn't.

Speaker 1 (03:30):
I didn't really know it was him.

Speaker 2 (03:32):
I had to look that up no, I knew it was him, so we
started.
Okay, for those who just heardme walking around everywhere uh,
we started earlier than I well,not earlier, but we started
kind of quickly.
So I didn't really set up theroom.
But we're set up there you go,tj you're doing great.

Speaker 1 (03:49):
I'm sorry ambience change in the middle.

Speaker 2 (03:52):
That's always easy to deal with no one will notice,
it won't sound any clearer anddefinitely not with a fan and a
fish tank in the background, butnow it's so clear it sounds so
quiet in here so I want yourfirst impressions of this movie
I hate that.

Speaker 1 (04:08):
I liked it zombie baby oh my god, was that awful.

Speaker 3 (04:13):
It happened the noises that it was making was I.
I was like that's upsetting, itwas.
And then I was like zombie baby, let's go that was very
disturbing to me what are youdoing to your brother back there
?

Speaker 1 (04:26):
That bothered me.

Speaker 2 (04:28):
We did get hyped for zombie baby, though.

Speaker 3 (04:30):
You did.
The baby didn't show up again.
I'm pretty sure it's stilllocked in that car.

Speaker 2 (04:35):
I was just going to say we never saw what happened
to that baby.

Speaker 1 (04:38):
Well, the interesting part is the baby would have
never been able to get out ofthe car seat.

Speaker 2 (04:42):
Well, no baby would have never been able to get out
of the car seat well, no, thekid might have let him out uh,
those zombies were smart yeah,they were doing stuff they were.
They were coordinated they'renot zombies.
They're infected you know, Ithink with a variant of the
chicken pox virus is what I butdoes it kill them?
I mean because that would bethe the deciding factor.

Speaker 3 (04:59):
It kills their brain it.
It sounded like he said thatthere was some parts that were
necrotic necrotic, yeah thescientist said that they,
they're basically not livinganymore.
So I don't think that.
I think it's.
It's like a, like a, a transfer.
I think it goes from infectedto zombie, because they're like
dying as they're already yeah,okay, because they don't like

(05:23):
die and then come back right, itjust happens, that's true which
, so it starts off as aninfection, and then it just
starts off as an infection andthen it keeps going
to.
It's like walking dead, where,like, the infection kills you
and you turn, except it doesn'tkill you, you just get infected
and turn and then you're, you'redead, you can't come back so

(05:45):
what makes me laugh about thisis looking up this movie to get
the um description definitioncomes up cooties fictitious
childhood disease.

Speaker 1 (05:56):
Cooties is a fictitious childhood disease
commonly used in games and asrejection term among children in
various countries, includingthe United States and Canada.
It serves as a playful way forchildren to express disgust or
to tag others in games likehumans versus zombies.
Additionally, the concept ofcooties teaches children

(06:16):
vulnerable lessons aboutinfectious diseases and public
health, highlighting how societytreats those who are perceived
as sick.
Highlighting how society treatsthose who are perceived as sick
, the term has also gainedpopularity in playground slang,
often leaving people curiousabout its origins and meanings.
You got to think further backthan the, than even the 19th
century.
Um, you go back to when theplague was.

(06:39):
You remember, ring around therosies?
Yeah uh, that was a.
It was a rhyme yeah talking.

Speaker 3 (06:48):
It was a way they educated kids.
So I don't think it's that far.
So, basically, the rosies arethe boobons that pop up on your
body when you have the plague oh, yes, yes, yeah, the rosies are
the scales they have to burnthe bodies, basically.

Speaker 1 (07:07):
Yep pocket full of posies is to help cover the
stench.
Yeah, dark, very dark, verydark.
Kids are singing that.

Speaker 2 (07:14):
That's why it's really creepy in horror movies
when they're singing that andactually spinning around Now I
will say that it did not looklike chickenpox in this.

Speaker 3 (07:26):
It spinning around now.
I will say that it did not looklike chicken pox in this.
It was, but it did not looklike it looked like super herpes
.

Speaker 2 (07:29):
For some reason, they just blisters all over their
face mouth region mostly I likehow they, they, the teachers,
see that that girl with that andthey don't at all think like
that's.

Speaker 3 (07:38):
Concerning the mom was just like yeah, you're not
sick, you're going to school.

Speaker 2 (07:43):
Yeah, they're just like oh yeah, she's just got
these the worst cold soresyou've ever seen in your entire
life.
That's fine and it's on herforehead it seemed so.

Speaker 1 (07:51):
It seemed so highly inappropriate, isn't it?
Because, like she had it allover her mouth.
It's like what is, what is yourrationale for this teacher?
Like, oh yeah, I saw yourstepdad had that too.

Speaker 2 (08:02):
Like, come on yeah, I don, yeah, I don't know.
I don't know what the thoughtprocess.
There was no thought processwith that.

Speaker 1 (08:07):
No, that was pretty bad.

Speaker 2 (08:09):
Although can we talk about.
I loved that when she decidedto take a chunk out of the
bully's cheek.

Speaker 1 (08:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (08:16):
The guy was just like , oh, did I send her to the
principal?

Speaker 3 (08:19):
No, I wanted to give her a high five.
The kid was a dick.
A high five, yeah, I mean Ialso rip off her fucking chunk
of her scalp first, so I feellike he got what he deserved
kind of right I mean to be fair,I would not have expected her
scalp to come off so I also didabsolutely love the fact that
she, um, what do you call it?

Speaker 1 (08:41):
uh, not she, um, I already forgot his name wade, I
think was his name.
Yeah, through the reference ofthe Hobbit in there.

Speaker 3 (08:48):
Yeah, eric got that a couple seconds later, yeah.

Speaker 2 (08:53):
TJ didn't even know that was the guy from the Hobbit
.

Speaker 3 (08:56):
Okay, is that right?
Yeah, I pointed it out to him.
Tj had no idea.
Is that right?

Speaker 2 (09:00):
Freaking.

Speaker 1 (09:01):
TJ didn't know, is that right Freaking?

Speaker 2 (09:02):
TJ didn't know, he had no idea.

Speaker 1 (09:03):
I was like dude that's Frodo so everybody knows
how this started, right yes?

Speaker 3 (09:12):
The guy fucked a chicken and gave it herpes, and
then cooked.

Speaker 2 (09:16):
It Sounds as plausible as you can get, you
know.

Speaker 1 (09:21):
You had an opportunity there.

Speaker 3 (09:26):
I'm very disappointed in both of you, that neither
one, neither one of you fuckingon.

Speaker 1 (09:28):
Nope, nope.
Neither one of you said theobvious I was.
I was counting on one of you tomake an obvious choking the
chicken joke how how could younot make a?

Speaker 3 (09:39):
choking the chicken joke boomers.
Yeah, I was in the chicken.

Speaker 2 (09:43):
I was literally gonna say but he literally did still,
yeah, I, we say it was the meat, or you know yeah exactly
that's not when we, when we hearchoke the chicken, you know
we're not thinking about thathere's the thing.

Speaker 1 (09:56):
Here's the thing.
I'm the host, so fuck you both.

Speaker 2 (10:00):
Well, if you hit us both equally, then we're still
equal all the time yeah, yeah,no I mean no too late, what.
Too late.
I've never choked a chicken Toolate.

Speaker 3 (10:10):
Look, I'll go grab it right now I just fucking come
back with the live chicken,strangle it.

Speaker 1 (10:16):
Too late.
I would not even appreciatethat, as highly entertaining as
that might be.

Speaker 2 (10:22):
Wow, that sounds sensitive.

Speaker 1 (10:23):
Very, I'm sensitive.

Speaker 3 (10:29):
Strength Okay.

Speaker 1 (10:30):
I gotta throw it out.
Gotta throw it out to our man,josh, because he came back and
said it's now called stranglingthe neck, rick.

Speaker 3 (10:36):
That's crazy.
One point for Josh.

Speaker 2 (10:41):
I could get behind that.

Speaker 1 (10:43):
Oh dang.

Speaker 2 (10:45):
Stroke.
Rick is kind of crazy.

Speaker 1 (10:46):
That just got gross.

Speaker 2 (10:50):
Ew.

Speaker 3 (10:50):
I don't like that one either.
That one's worse, cockrick.

Speaker 1 (10:55):
Anyways, what did we learn about this virus?

Speaker 2 (10:59):
We are on live.

Speaker 3 (11:00):
It is spread through bites and scratches.
It is spread through bites andscratches, but only if you're
under puberty age does itactually zombify you.

Speaker 1 (11:12):
Isn't that wild.

Speaker 3 (11:13):
If you're over, then it gives you diarrhea and makes
you throw up.
You get the flu.

Speaker 2 (11:18):
It's an interesting premise.

Speaker 1 (11:20):
It was like it was so wild to me that they went this
route, which that was why I readthe definition of cooties,
because it's it's comical thatthey made this specifically for
children, and young children atthat.
So of course, you know, beingadult, you have the advantage
there that being adult.

(11:47):
Now, what do you guys thinkabout the um, the scratches?
We've had this conversation inthe past, in another episode
regarding the scratching, and Ican't quite rationalize this one
.
In the past I rationalized itby saying I believed the
scratching would cause effectbecause, no matter what the case
, somebody's getting attacked bya zombie, they're most likely
going to be scratching andtrying to defend themselves, to

(12:10):
no avail.
Of course, it's not going tohelp, but then when they return,
their fingernails are going tobe absolutely disgusting and
contaminated.
Right, that was my, my rational, my rationale in previous
episodes.
How, how could this berationalized?
Do you guys have any ideas?

Speaker 3 (12:28):
what I usually think is for like the walking dead or
stuff like that, is not onlylike your point, but also every
part of the zombie is dying,including their under their
fingernails.
You know, so, um, you know thatthat part gets loose like you
know, so, um, you know that thatpart gets loose, like you know,
when you're dead.
So I'm guessing that hassomething to do with, like you

(12:50):
know, you're getting zombiejuices in you.
Um, this one, maybe I hate theway you worded that Maybe
because of the, maybe becausethey had chicken nuggets under
their fingernails?
I don't fucking know.
It doesn't really make sense inthis case, because the only
real rotted part of them is theimmediate affected area and

(13:10):
their blood yeah, the blood too.
So I don't, I don't really seehow it could transfer that way
yeah, that bites.

Speaker 2 (13:17):
Yes, because your mouth is disgusting that's
obvious I I do think that I'mgenerally, in most cases, on the
side of scratches would notinfect, but rather scratches
would introduce you to someawful potential infection.
Not zombie, but just ingentDamn.

(13:37):
Sorry, my fish just tried tojump out the tank and slammed
his face on the top he's pullinga TJ's fish Quite larger, and
it makes a really loud noise.

Speaker 3 (13:51):
Dude, tj's fish is massive he's also not dead yet.

Speaker 2 (13:54):
It's not a euphemism, it's a literal fish.

Speaker 1 (13:57):
Well, okay, so while we're on this, his cod is huge.
While we're on this subject ofscratches, as you guys, really,
when TJ was talking, it kind ofcame into my head what do you
think the rationalization wouldbe?
Or how believable is therationalization to say the

(14:18):
scratch is infected because whenthey were scratching people,
the skin under the fingernailswas breaking and they were
transferring their blood?

Speaker 3 (14:30):
That's possible.
I think what they're going forin this is just because,
cootie's, when you're a kid,it's just like oh, it's just tag
.
Yeah, jonathan touched me hehas I have cooties, you know.

Speaker 1 (14:42):
So I think they're kind of going for that type beat
.
But we're going to go.
We're going to go there.

Speaker 2 (14:47):
I think that is the extent of the logic.
If we also consider the rest ofthe law, the logic of this
movie.
I think that's the extent ofthe law of the logic, because I
mean you've you've scratchedyourself before or accidentally
scratched someone before itdoesn't break your nail.

Speaker 1 (15:06):
Yeah, no, it takes kind of a lot.
Yeah, it would take a lot.

Speaker 2 (15:08):
So I definitely think the extent of the logic was oh,
you're scratched, you'reinfected.

Speaker 3 (15:13):
I am looking up how chicken pox spreads touching
chicken pox blisters or throughthe air, um, or if somebody like
sneezes, you know um which isin the air that's how chicken
pox spreads, so possibleblisters under the nails or
something well, it is also achicken pox variant, so true, so

(15:34):
it could have.

Speaker 2 (15:34):
Just it could act completely differently, yeah,
but essentially still come fromthe same thing, but be
completely different, you know?
Mm-hmm.

Speaker 3 (15:42):
So then yeah, that's just yeah.

Speaker 1 (15:46):
So then we'll get past that part.
I think that's.

Speaker 2 (15:49):
I think that was that , I think you're right.

Speaker 1 (15:51):
We solved that Now in most of our previous episodes.
We have varying decisions.
We have varying decisions and Ithink that the actual decision
they made in this movie tobarricade themselves in was the
correct choice amongst all therest.
What do you guys say?

Speaker 2 (16:08):
I agree.
I think they could have.
Well, I don't know.
I agree to an extent, but oncethey got under the vents, I
think you got to get out.

Speaker 3 (16:18):
Yeah.
So like yes, they did barricadethemselves in, like they
barricaded themselves a bunch oftimes where they like locked
the doors and stuff, but a lotof the time when they're running
from them, they just leave thedoors open behind them.

Speaker 2 (16:32):
Oh yeah, and they wouldn't throw stuff like in the
way there's like big stacks ofchairs and shit, like in the
hallway when they're running.

Speaker 3 (16:38):
Why don't you throw some of that shit down?
Slow them?

Speaker 2 (16:40):
down a little bit.
I think part of the thoughtprocess is that like what if we
have to go back that way?

Speaker 1 (16:46):
but I, I think, one problem at a time, you know yeah
, I think um one thing that I Iwill say, as far as barricading
went, that I was ratherimpressed with, was when they
had gone through the ducts.
Um, I forget Elijah Woodscharacter's name, uh, clint,
when Clint and um I was going tosay Frodo yeah.

(17:09):
Chick, god, I have.
I have it here.
I got to just scroll up herewhen Clint and Lucy went through
the vents and they went.
Uh, they went a different waybecause the kids got into the
vents.
Clearly they would right.
They're much smaller, easier tomaneuver.
Yeah, but I loved how wadehandled it from his end when
they told him the kids werecoming.

(17:30):
He had them throw stuff up tohim and he packed the vent with
stuff, closed the vent and I Idon't think he screwed it down,
but he strapped it ratchet,strapped it yeah he did I think
ultimately, he was a good leaderyeah, a little little gung-ho,
but

Speaker 2 (17:47):
a little bit like, but he had, like, I think he had
the heart that you need to be aleader and he was willing to
like he trusted uh, lucy was hername when she was like both of
your guys' ideas are stupid, weshould do this, yeah.
So I think, like I do think hehad the leader instincts.
As much of a doofus as he kindof was, I ended up liking him

(18:10):
and actually reallyunderstanding him.
And then, especially when Lucyand Clint kissed, I was telling
TJ, I was like, oh, I was like Idon't like this.
I'm actually on Wade's side,like that's really shitty of her
, which?

Speaker 1 (18:23):
I actually kind of like that they all came to that
agreement.

Speaker 2 (18:27):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (18:27):
Like well, wade, you know, didn't even want to hear
about it.
He just kind of shut it down.
But Clint even told him when Iwas kissing her what.
But I think the the barricadingNow there is that funny part
that I think was kind of alittle bit of a diss was they

(18:51):
went out onto that balcony, orthey called it the roof, to try
to get the PTA parents'attention.
That's where the zombie babyoccurred, which was devastating
to me.
I did not like that part.
But where were the otherparents had it already taken
over.

Speaker 2 (19:07):
They kind of mentioned that.
Yeah they kind of mentionedthat.
And then when they got toDanville and they saw all the TV
screens in the window, it waseverywhere.

Speaker 1 (19:18):
But you think it already got everywhere by 3 pm
that same day well, think about,because there were no other
parents like don't, wouldn't youexpect I know for me.

Speaker 2 (19:28):
Think about every school in the district got it
all at once because it was allthrough the chicken nuggets that
were no, no, I, I get I get itcompletely chicken nuggets, so
like families.
You know just because, speakingof which, what did?
What did you get?
Ollie, completely chickennuggets, so like that's what I
mean.
You know just because, speakingof, which.

Speaker 1 (19:42):
What did?
What did you get ollie today?

Speaker 2 (19:44):
chicken nuggets but they specifically asked me for
that I was.
I called corinne to ask her ifshe wanted any whoa hold the
presses.

Speaker 1 (19:53):
This is, uh, this is worthy of stopping the podcast.

Speaker 2 (19:57):
Guess who just came into the live I have a guess who
uh, oh my god, that's what Iwas gonna say sam sam sam, just
came back into the live.

Speaker 3 (20:08):
Haven't seen you in a minute thank you for 20 donuts
fuck yeah I want welcome backnow, come over to my life,
because these guys stink I wouldlove you stink.

Speaker 1 (20:22):
You are part of these guys, yeah yeah, you are part
of these guys now.
Now is where I want to hearsomebody saying they tripped
eric or tj, because I definitelybelieve.
Yep, lol, tj.

Speaker 3 (20:37):
What she's tripping you, bro, she's tripping you I'm
tripping she, she's going totrip you while we are all
running oh, good luck with thatyou do not have to be the
fastest, you just have to befaster than one other person,
but I guarantee you're shorterthan me which would kind of make
it easier.
No, not if I'm in my stridealready.
I'm pretty sure, even if I'm inmy stride already.

Speaker 1 (20:59):
I'm pretty sure, even if I'm in my stride, eric would
be able to trip me.

Speaker 3 (21:04):
Yeah, I always stay vigilant though.

Speaker 1 (21:07):
I mean you might be able to.
No, you would get up fasterthan me.

Speaker 2 (21:12):
I would roll If I fell.

Speaker 1 (21:14):
I'd go into a roll Because if you knew you were
going to trip me and you came infront of me and tripped me.
I would take the harder hit.
Oh yeah, I mean, you might hurtmy ankle a little bit and I'm
also fucking old, so it wouldtake me probably three to five
seconds longer to get up.

Speaker 3 (21:29):
If somebody like Eric tries to trip me like he sticks
his leg out, I'm just going torun through it.
His leg's getting obliterated,you know.

Speaker 2 (21:36):
You see, that might be true actually.

Speaker 3 (21:37):
That's like getting hit with a motorcycle, you know.

Speaker 1 (21:40):
Sam asks how tall are you?

Speaker 3 (21:41):
Six foot eight and three quarters.

Speaker 1 (21:42):
No, you're not.
Six foot three.
Six two six, three and onequarter, are you being for?

Speaker 2 (21:48):
real.
Shut the fuck up.
After six foot you don't countquarters.

Speaker 3 (21:51):
You don't count quarters, fuck you.
I'm six, three.

Speaker 1 (21:53):
Yeah, six, three, three Sam.

Speaker 3 (21:56):
Guaranteed, guaranteed.
You're like what?
5'4" Sam yeah.

Speaker 2 (22:02):
If I stick my foot out to try and trip TJ and he
was full sprint he might breakmy ankle, my mom's in my life,
hi mom.
Nice, Hi mom.
But yeah, he might break myankle by just slamming into it.

Speaker 1 (22:16):
Josh says well, I mean, even a small stick can
throw you off your bike.
I josh says well, I mean, evena small stick can throw you off
your bike.

Speaker 2 (22:23):
I mean potentially, but here's.
So here's the thing if I dotrip you tj, you're screwed once
you hit the ground mellow,you're six foot.
No, that's gonna be that I canjust roll like cannonball from
ben 10 homie I just lock all mybody into one round ball and
just roll I think if you fall,that's it, but tall, I think

(22:43):
it'd be hard to to take you downno, you know what I if, if
adrenaline is pumping, though, Idon't think I would even like.

Speaker 1 (22:50):
I think I'll just shake it off, like really quick
maybe so I'm gonna use that tosegue back into the movie
because I think it's anappropriate point.
When you're charging throughthe playground like that, I
think it's far more likely thatyou're tripping over kids I'm
not gonna lie maybe, maybe notyou, and I'm not trying to dig
at you, no I.

Speaker 2 (23:10):
I was saying it while I'm watching this movie.
I genuinely think I survivedthis one.
I don't think I survived mostof them and like I think I could
survive this one, it's children.
Yeah, they're.

Speaker 3 (23:19):
And the thing is, if they're like gonna bite you why
don't you just cover yourself insomething they can't bite
through?
Go to the fucking library andwrap a bunch of fucking
magazines around you Magazines?

Speaker 1 (23:30):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (23:31):
They're like nine years old.
Like just fucking punt them.
You know what they're kids.

Speaker 3 (23:35):
Wrap broccoli around you.

Speaker 1 (23:36):
Wrap broccoli.

Speaker 3 (23:43):
True, broccoli around you wrap broccoli, true, okay,
we didn't try that, just make abroccoli like pepper spray.

Speaker 1 (23:46):
you know, start when they go to ah spray in their
mouth they'll be like a broccolispray yeah yeah you know,
what's interesting is maybe notbroccoli, right, but you can't
be far off here because welearned that ritalin and
adderall worked oh yeah, so justthey like od'd on it knocked

(24:06):
them out crazy yeah, which isalso another point, that they
were more infected than zombiesthat was definitely more of a
message to society than I thinkso that felt targeted.

Speaker 3 (24:18):
Do you like violence?

Speaker 1 (24:20):
yeah, I actually thought that they were going to
change their report and then Irealized it wouldn't make any
sense for them.
I mean it, but it's also ahorror comedy.
It wasn't really trying to betoo serious, but I thought that
they were going to change themessage that, uh, it was uh,
pre-adolescence that werevulnerable to this virus, and

(24:40):
maybe that it was all of thedrugged and but it.
It didn't, but it was.

Speaker 2 (24:46):
It was so wild that they had so many freaking pills
yeah and in their backpacksright they definitely made some
commentary about that becauseyou saw it in the classroom,
children.

Speaker 1 (24:56):
Yeah, and I I think it's true.

Speaker 2 (24:57):
Kids, overmedicated children yeah, and I think it's
true Kids are overmedicatednowadays.

Speaker 1 (25:00):
Definitely.

Speaker 2 (25:02):
I mean, it's like I'm sad once I need antidepressants
.
You're like whoa, maybe beingsad is normal occasionally and
kids being attention deficit.
You can't pay attention inclass.
That has a lot to do withscreens, then it's.
It's kind of just given.

Speaker 1 (25:20):
I definitely believe that it's screen time sitting
down.
We weren't allowed to sit downin my youth.
You didn't go inside,especially like during
summertime.
No way, my mom would becleaning hell.
No, you get your filthy assoutside.

Speaker 3 (25:34):
That was, that was the rule like you know, if my
friends are outside, I would beoutside but, as soon as we go
inside, I'd be on the fuckinggame.
Or, if it's like a rainy day,on the game but I would always
like you know go out ride bikeswith my friends and shit and get
into trouble.

Speaker 2 (25:51):
I was dumb shit my half and half was my mom's.
I pretty much never playedgames.
I would occasionally play acomputer game, and that's when I
was really into mmos, but uh,when I would come to california,
that's when I would play mostof my games yeah, drinking,
drinking from the water hoseplays games drinking from the

(26:13):
water hose.

Speaker 1 (26:13):
That was our thing, so yeah, we definitely got
cooties from the water hose.
We would get up, we would getup, we would get up, we would go
, go outside, probably by andI'm talking summertime, and as
we're approaching summertimehere for most of the school kids
, you go outside as soon as, assoon as, I'd say roughly around
10 am, you're outside and youdon't come back until the

(26:35):
streetlights are on.

Speaker 3 (26:37):
I would I go fucking past that summertime dude it
over.
Here it gets dark at likefucking 9 30.
I'd be out till fucking 10.
Then I go inside it'd be dark.

Speaker 1 (26:49):
I'll be like yep, time to go in no, no, we had to
go in, it was.
The rule was streetlights areon and the streetlights came on
mid-summer.
Uh, right at the right at thesolstice, it's about 8 pm, just
a little after 8 pm, I'd saylike 8 15 he's more northern
than us.

Speaker 2 (27:05):
Yeah, and it makes a big difference.
Oh, absolutely there, holy crap, it was like 9, 30 and the sun
wasn't going down and it'sfucking may I believe it it was
pretty dope dude.

Speaker 3 (27:15):
We're fucking middle of the night.

Speaker 1 (27:17):
We're playing outside that was, that was uh, that was
our thing.
So there was one thing that Idid not really notice in there
was uh, it got dark quick,didn't it?

Speaker 2 (27:30):
yeah we were like mid-afternoon I was like I don't
even know.
Okay, it just seemed like thatkind of movie.

Speaker 3 (27:38):
They said wait till what three?

Speaker 1 (27:40):
and then they went three right, and then they
couldn't have been.

Speaker 3 (27:43):
All of a sudden it was dark yeah, it was just like
maybe a couple hours later, andthen it was dark, so five and it
was, and it was summertime yeah, like weird yeah, so there was
that.

Speaker 1 (27:55):
Then there was, of course, the fantastic janitor
comes in now.
I did love his.
Uh, I felt the exact same way.
That way did as he's tellinghis story.
It's like okay, this is takingso long.
Yeah, why, why are you doingthat?
I loved how he he used the 80smovies montage for that whole

(28:19):
scene which was absolutelyperfect.

Speaker 3 (28:21):
He made katana out of fucking garden cheers and was
murking.
It was crazy.
It was like dog.
The hiring process on thismovie was fucking crazy, because
they're like howstereotypically Japanese, just
vaguely Japanese, can you be?

Speaker 1 (28:42):
Bro, you got it, you got to give the most credit to
Wade, who comes up with an airpressurized pitching machine.
I think I think it was apitching machine that he somehow
fit on his back and mounted it.
And you.

Speaker 3 (28:58):
I mean, I saw some of those straight headshots, man
that was brutal, the balls atlike fucking 100, I mean this
was.

Speaker 1 (29:11):
This was from an elementary school, but I'll tell
you I I'll bet you money, it'sat least 60 miles an hour do you
think you could actually makesomething that would shoot with
that velocity, that's hand-sizedlike portable?

Speaker 2 (29:24):
Oh, most definitely, dude.

Speaker 3 (29:27):
I'm telling you, in the apocalypse I would just be
in just tinkering with shit.
I already have ideas on how todo it.
You know those old like hotwheel tracks where you take the
car and push it through thoseseats.
Okay, so something like that.
I just get like two big ass dcmotors, get a like a backpack to
hold a battery and just havelike a feeding tunnel for

(29:49):
something and just like have itmounted.
It'd be heavy as shit but itwould kick.

Speaker 1 (29:54):
I already got ideas, plans, have you guys?
Have you guys?
This goes out to josh becausehe's absolutely right on this
have you guys ever heard ofpotato guns?
Oh yeah, those are dangerousnow if we were in the apocalypse
?
You can't use potatoes, so youhave to use something else,
right, something not edible, soyou're not wasting your food,
your food source a little bitbigger.

(30:15):
You'd have to go a little bitbigger than that just stick a
whole bunch of coins in there.

Speaker 2 (30:18):
High key.

Speaker 1 (30:20):
Alice from Resident Evil.

Speaker 2 (30:23):
Reusable.
There you go, fucking femurs.

Speaker 3 (30:26):
I like that.
Just go click the funnels andjust start launching them.

Speaker 1 (30:30):
You just use the whole thighs.

Speaker 3 (30:31):
Yeah just.
Right, right, that's amazing.
All you need is an accelerant,something, something I mean we
used to use like a brake cleaneryeah, air spray or fucking axe
or something like that.

Speaker 1 (30:46):
You fill the chamber with it we used to use brake
cleaner and then you'd screw onbrake cleaners, the little, the
little uh flint.
We used to use a flint from abick lighter that you would just
screw it on, and then youfreaking strike that thing and
oh, we got some launch on thosethings starting fluid.

(31:07):
You could use starting fluidthat'd probably fucking blow it
up though it might depending onwhat you use.
I mean, if you use you use somegood like schedule 80, but if it
does explode, you're you're ina world of hurt now.
We're talking now about usingwhatever you can as a weapon.
Being resourceful is always ago-to in every kind of survival

(31:31):
situation.
Right, you can't?
You can't let things go towaste if something has a use.
This is where I think not to bea cliche, but I think gamers
have a pretty good comprehensionof theoretical knowledge of not
leaving shit behind.

Speaker 3 (31:49):
Both of you guys have talked about it, Especially
fucking Eric dude.
He's a loot fiend.
I am not.
I am not a loot goblin, you aredude.

Speaker 1 (31:57):
I like that name.
I am not A loot goblin.

Speaker 3 (32:00):
Dude, he just fucking runs through and snatches
everything and then leaves I?

Speaker 2 (32:05):
I only grab what I could use.

Speaker 3 (32:07):
Sure, I've never once picked up a great sword or
anything like that you literallydid not even need that fire
grease and you still took it Ifor my bow.

Speaker 2 (32:16):
Yes, I did what nah bro oh, you're talking about the
one time.
Okay, there was.
There was one time that I I onetime.

Speaker 1 (32:24):
There was one time, was it just one time?

Speaker 2 (32:26):
it was just one time that I accidentally took uh fire
grease when I already had afire weapon, so that was kind of
pointless, but that was onetime and what I mean.

Speaker 1 (32:37):
But what did you commit some kind of a sin where,
like TJ, actually needed that,but you took it anyway.

Speaker 2 (32:42):
No.

Speaker 3 (32:43):
So TJ didn't need it.
Who cares?

Speaker 1 (32:45):
I always need it, that's, that's no problem, he
never needs it.
So not specifically this movie,because we didn't actually come
across this situation otherthan the fact that they had to
go to the vending machine to getcandy for a diabetic kid, right
.
Go to the vending machine toget candy for a diabetic kid,
right.
Uh, not in that situation.
But as you're out scavengingand you're going house to house,

(33:06):
what items are you gonna lookfor first to take with you?

Speaker 2 (33:11):
first uh, do I have a weapon?
Um, we'll say yeah okay, well,I might be looking for a better
weapon, um but, then, I'm alsojust looking for maybe canned
food or something, because I'mthinking kind of more long-term.
But I don't know.
It kind of depends, because ifwe're going to be on the run
right now, like we have to run,I'm looking more for a weapon

(33:32):
that I can defend myself with.

Speaker 1 (33:33):
Okay, you're going straight for the garage.

Speaker 3 (33:35):
I'm going straight for the garage.
I'm going to see what kind offricking power tools they got in
there, maybe even, like I don'tknow, fucking one of those long
ass saws on a stick, you know,one of the chainsaws on a stick
that they use for branches.
Okay, also food, that's.
Yeah, I'm assuming the water isgoing to work for like a little

(33:56):
bit, so I'll already have likecontainers and stuff to fill,
and they're already filled bythen, you know.
So, food and weapon.

Speaker 1 (34:04):
So you would?
You would start by fillingwater.
Yeah, filling containers.

Speaker 3 (34:08):
Water is more important than food.
I could survive without foodfor three weeks.

Speaker 1 (34:13):
Completely agree.

Speaker 3 (34:15):
I got a lot of stores here.

Speaker 1 (34:20):
Completely agree.

Speaker 2 (34:21):
Eric will immediately die after three days.
I don't need to eat that much,man he really doesn't eat that
much exactly you know,

Speaker 1 (34:26):
what you know, what does it when he, when he plays
around with the devil's lettuceit does make me quite hungry
then he's like I gotta eat oh mygod the guy in the van.
He just ate a whole bag ofshrooms oh my god, was that the
best thing ever, or what he'sover here seeing people getting
eaten and then he, a cop, pullsup and he's like priorities, I'm

(34:47):
not getting caught I'm notgetting caught start seeing
giraffes, how dude he's likeyeah, are you on drugs too, like
what the?

Speaker 3 (34:57):
fuck and me and eric the whole time we're.
Is he going to do anything,this movie, or is he just going
to be in the van the whole time?

Speaker 2 (35:04):
He was just in the van the whole time.
Huh, he redeemed himself.

Speaker 1 (35:08):
He redeemed himself.
For sure.
All right, but yeah, whenyou're in these types of
situations, what do you guysthink is the better way?
Are you a stick together kindof guy, or are you a split up
and get it done kind of guy?

Speaker 2 (35:24):
uh, I don't know, tg, you want to go first?

Speaker 1 (35:26):
you can use this, this movie, as your, as your
launching point um.

Speaker 3 (35:31):
So basically, you know, near the end where rain
wilson's character is gettingswarmed by the cootie children,
yep, um, and they're all on topof them.
Yep, uh.
Well, while me and eric werewatching it, I was like pov 100
men versus a gorilla oh yeah,that seems pretty accurate

(35:53):
actually 100 men versus twogorillas would definitely beat
the dudes.

Speaker 1 (35:59):
I feel like I feel like there would be a better
chance the gorillas would win,so that's why my point is at
least one or two more friendswith me that could.
I like it.
Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 3 (36:11):
In this situation.

Speaker 1 (36:12):
Yeah, in most situations.

Speaker 3 (36:14):
I feel like I could get through at least 112 of
these children before I'm I'mdown.

Speaker 2 (36:20):
Damn 12, 112, 112, 112.
112 of these children beforeI'm I'm down.
Damn.
12, 112, 112.
That seems like a lot.
I think you underestimate howmany 100 you could throw 100
punches.

Speaker 3 (36:33):
Oh yeah, I think.
Tune in on instagram next week,where we all that's gonna take
a lot of endurance challenge I.

Speaker 2 (36:38):
I think you might be overestimating yourself.

Speaker 1 (36:43):
The other part is when you punch.
We're not talking about airpunches.
Could you hit a heavy bag Ahundred times in quick
succession?
It's more like With equal powerbetween punches.
I don't think it's constantpunches.

Speaker 3 (36:58):
I'm not going like anime style.
You know I'm going like, butthey're know I'm gonna go like.
I got you no, but they'recoming at you one after the
other.
So it's going to be more likepunch boom, punch throw, knock a
punch down.
Yeah, I'm not gonna lie, stop,you know I'm not gonna lie with
adrenaline.

Speaker 2 (37:15):
You maybe get about 15 punches and slash shove kicks
in before you're like holy fuckCause, you're not just.
It's not like you're juststanding in your room punching
at open air.
It's like Alex is saying likeyou're hitting something and
granted it's, it's a child.

Speaker 1 (37:30):
So it's not like oh, this is so bad.
I'm surprised we haven't beenrestricted yet.

Speaker 2 (37:35):
But the the idea would be that any sort of
resistance it's gonna takesomething out of you and I don't
know, I think I would have torun.

Speaker 3 (37:45):
Okay, so we need a willing child participant for me
to punch on the top of the headand see if they survive.

Speaker 1 (37:51):
I got to give a Fenriris.

Speaker 3 (37:54):
It's got a kid.

Speaker 1 (37:58):
Oh my.

Speaker 3 (37:58):
God, just one punch, I'll give you a thousand dollars
, dollars so you don't have athousand dollars, so I actually
do currently have a thousanddollars okay as tj's saying this
.

Speaker 1 (38:10):
Ben ruris types in quote you underestimate my power
, end quote.
And he says easy, obi wannabewow, that's pretty good I, I
truly do have that one ground.

Speaker 3 (38:23):
I am six three, so it is.

Speaker 1 (38:25):
That part is true.
That is the high ground.
Oh man, all right, all right.

Speaker 3 (38:31):
So let me see that was crazy I'm gonna go to the
nearest museum, try to find thebiggest set of armor.

Speaker 2 (38:37):
I can, yeah, you know we've talked about it,
something like a shark suitwould actually be kind of
beneficial in a situation likethis I'm talking any sort of
like.

Speaker 1 (38:48):
I need the impact from the metal to also help my
punch okay, all right, this ispretty good down this fucking
street, just clang clang, clangclang that's why I've always
liked the shark suit, becauseit's kevlar yeah silent,
flexible, maneuverable thesekids were strong, though they

(39:10):
ripped off somebody's arm right,yeah, I feel like they would.

Speaker 2 (39:13):
They definitely have shit out of socket yeah, yeah,
they definitely had super shanks, all right so I gotta, I gotta,
read josh's comment here.

Speaker 1 (39:20):
He's got a scenario for us.
The scenario you have to fightan unlimited amount of third
graders and every 10th round afifth grader joins in.
How many rounds would yousurvive with just your fists?

Speaker 3 (39:34):
one more time how many?

Speaker 1 (39:36):
you have an unlimited like unlimited amount of third
graders and uh, yeah, how sounlimited?
How many per round, josh?

Speaker 3 (39:45):
per round.
This is important.

Speaker 2 (39:47):
That does adjust my answer what's the race?

Speaker 3 (39:48):
of this fifth grader also oh my god, please don't say
samoan.

Speaker 1 (39:52):
Please don't say that's crazy.

Speaker 3 (39:57):
20 videos of little samoan fifth graders looking
like fucking middle schoolersrunning.

Speaker 1 (40:03):
They're 20 per round.
20 per round 23rd grader.

Speaker 3 (40:08):
Final Okay so every 10th round.
Is it like final boss fight?
So like no more graders andthen the fifth grader comes out.

Speaker 1 (40:16):
Answer that Josh.

Speaker 2 (40:17):
Or maybe it's on a timer, Is it?
Oh no.

Speaker 1 (40:20):
He says and joins in.
A fifth grader joins in, soit'll be 21 in that round.

Speaker 3 (40:24):
Wow, 40.

Speaker 1 (40:27):
Mellow's half Samoan.
You'll get up to round 40?
No?

Speaker 3 (40:29):
I'll get 240.
I can get 40.

Speaker 1 (40:33):
How long is each round?

Speaker 3 (40:36):
Because third graders .
Cod zombies Eventually it'sfetch me their souls.
They're all coming at once.
Do I get a weapon or am?
I just bare hands, bare hands,just your fists damn, give me a
katana or something there's nochallenge with that I know I

(40:56):
mean like that would up thechances of like how I could
probably get through at leastlike 80.
Give me a gun.

Speaker 1 (41:02):
No, no time limit, so you could take 150 rounds.
I can get through you couldtake as long as you want to
clear the 20.
Wow, so impressive.
See, see that that I would justI would.

Speaker 2 (41:16):
I think I could get the one.

Speaker 1 (41:18):
I think I could get up to 40 to round 40.
I could tell you how to 20, 20kids come out and I have to take
them all out.
But there's no time limit.
But I can only use my fiststhat I'm running around, I'm
climbing up on walls that theycan't reach to rest.
I regain my strength forperiods of time.
I jump back down or I boot themfrom the top of the wall well,

(41:41):
we gotta ask how tall is thiswall I have.
I think of right outside Sevenfeet Eight feet.

Speaker 3 (41:46):
You don't have a great record.

Speaker 2 (41:48):
Josh.
Are they afraid?
Shut up Just saying Are theyafraid of death, Death?

Speaker 3 (41:55):
Are they afraid of death?
I feel like if they're justregular kids, they're afraid.

Speaker 1 (41:59):
No, they're not.

Speaker 2 (42:00):
But they're just regular kids.
They're afraid.
No, they're not, but they'renot regular kids.

Speaker 1 (42:02):
They wouldn't be afraid of death.
No, they're zombie kids.

Speaker 2 (42:04):
They're infected.

Speaker 1 (42:05):
They're like these kids.

Speaker 3 (42:07):
I was going to say, if they're afraid, I would just
brutally maul one of them,they'd get afraid that would add
shock damage.
They'd be like ah.

Speaker 2 (42:17):
And then I would just run at them.

Speaker 3 (42:17):
Traditionally.
Yeah, that would work, but so Icould take at least 100 men
versus one gorilla, I thinkthat's crazy.

Speaker 1 (42:23):
Five rounds.

Speaker 2 (42:25):
I could do it, I could probably do it, I think
you.

Speaker 3 (42:28):
But I definitely think you're right if Wade would
have had Mr Beast.
Can you sponsor this video idea?
Oh, my God no, that would behilarious.

Speaker 2 (42:39):
That would be rough.

Speaker 1 (42:40):
Jesus.

Speaker 3 (42:42):
Hi everybody, welcome back to another video.
Today we are doing the 100third graders versus one man
challenge.
If he can make it through all100 within the time limit, he
gets two hundred thousanddollars and this lamborghini I
was gonna say two hundredthousand is not that much in a
Mr Beast video.

(43:02):
He's getting cheap lately.

Speaker 2 (43:04):
I'm not going to lie, damn.

Speaker 1 (43:09):
Sponsored by.

Speaker 2 (43:10):
Carl's Jr.

Speaker 1 (43:11):
Just had Carl's Jr, oh God, all right.
So getting back on topic here,why, when you're in this
situation, you are cornerededand you have to find an escape
route, right, ultimately, that'syour goal.
You've got to get out of there.
You're going to have to planfor this escape somehow.

(43:33):
But I think, just like thismovie pointed out, escape is
much bigger than just gettingout of the school, right?
I mean, how far do you sit andplan?
Uh, what do you try toaccomplish in your planning to
get out of the school and then?

Speaker 2 (43:49):
oh shit um well one.
You got to know if it, if iteven spread outside the school.
But once you find out that itdid, that's, uh, that's a big
goof.
I don't, yeah, I mean at that,I think you're trying to collect
canned food and stuff fortravel and then trying to find
some place to call home, I guesssome sort of defensible area.

Speaker 3 (44:11):
I would go less canned food and more dry goods
like pasta and shit.

Speaker 2 (44:17):
Preservable food, you know.

Speaker 3 (44:18):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (44:19):
Things that aren't going to spoil Rice.
Things that you can easily eatwhile on the road.

Speaker 3 (44:22):
Rice is heavy, though , if you.

Speaker 1 (44:24):
So, it is, it is.

Speaker 2 (44:26):
You also need a water and a fire source Cans.
You can just pop open and eatthem cold.

Speaker 3 (44:31):
You know they're gross, but you can, you can
throw them in some water and letthem soak.

Speaker 1 (44:43):
Also kind of heavy.
One bag we'll call it a20-pound bag will feed you for
quite some time, and if you canaccomplish getting a protein
source, I'm going to use tuna,for example.

Speaker 3 (44:52):
Not chicken.

Speaker 1 (44:53):
Not chicken.
I mean you could get chicken.
If you could get canned chicken, it will work just the same as
canned tuna.

Speaker 2 (44:58):
Not in this world.

Speaker 1 (44:59):
That wouldn't be a problem, not in this world, but
as long as you didn't getchicken from that farm you're
okay.

Speaker 3 (45:06):
Chickpeas From Fort Chicken.
Such a stupid name for a town.

Speaker 2 (45:12):
Fort Chicken, fort Chicken.
I love Danville, at least fornot Fort Chicken.

Speaker 1 (45:16):
But if you get yourself some we'll say, tuna,
rice and oil right, olive oil,avocado oil, something of that
nature you will survive forquite some time on that.
It's not going to be a widevariety of food and it's not
going to always taste that great, but it will keep you alive for
a long time.

Speaker 2 (45:34):
You know, I think about it from time to time.
I really don't think that if azombie apocalypse were to happen
, that houses would becompletely looted, I think from
the amount of people that aregoing to perish right away, at
the very start of it.

Speaker 3 (45:51):
You know how many of them are at home.

Speaker 2 (45:52):
There's going to be way too many houses compared to
survivors.
I don't really think you.
I think all fresh stuff.
Yeah, we'll eventually go bad,but I think all the all the
preserved stuff like the, likepeanut butter and canned food
and stuff that people have riceand whatnot, I mean, unless you
like, have an organized grouplooting an entire neighborhood.

(46:16):
Odds of finding an unlootedhouse are not that low.
Uh, initially I think it wouldbe like you know 10 years in
where you're like, okay, there'snothing anywhere.
Everybody, all the survivorswho are alive have looted the
surrounding areas, like thatwould make sense.

Speaker 3 (46:34):
But initially I I think you can easily find that
kind of stuff that has likeinstead of I, I would say like,
if you're preparing to like, youknow, if you're looting a house
, let's say, and you go in thefridge and you're like, oh,
stuff's starting to go bad, getthe stuff that has like seeds in
it.
You know, like tomatoes,cucumbers have seeds all the

(46:54):
fruits and shit.
And you can.
You can farm those like keep,keep that and farm them, you
know.

Speaker 2 (47:00):
Well, so here's the problem A lot of food nowadays
is not necessarily organic orfresh.
Do you think you could growAlex?
You'd probably know this better.
Do you think you could growtomato or whatnot from
store-bought tomatoes?
You can, I've seen it happen.

Speaker 1 (47:16):
You can.
One of the problems withnon-organic, non-heirloom
tomatoes is, or fruits andvegetables in general, is they
can?
I say I don't know.
They grow them to mutate theseeds to prevent uh
pollinization and uh germination.
Like they, they specificallydon't want them to grow again,

(47:38):
so they in essence they,sterilize them okay, so go to
your nearest hipster fuckingwhole foods store.

Speaker 3 (47:47):
Get yourself some all organic heirloom fucking
whatever all organic uh non-gmofruits and vegetables should be,
should be good to go um, butyeah

Speaker 2 (47:58):
but here's the problem depot there's seeds.
I was gonna yeah, you couldjust go to any hardware store
that has a garden section andjust find all the seeds you
would need.
Yeah, nobody's thinking of that.

Speaker 1 (48:08):
Here's a problem that comes with it.
It's not so much the plantingthe fruit and vegetables, it's
planting them and getting a fullyield.
Yeah, growing and maintainingyou have to expect you're going
to have a certain amount of loss.
So the more land you have, thebetter, because the more you can
plant.
But you're going to lose plants, you're going to lose fruit,

(48:31):
you're going to have problemswith pests, rodents and other
animals getting in and eatingyour fruit and plants.
So would it be possible?
Absolutely, it would bedifficult, because everything's
going to start going hungrybased on the downfall of the
world.
People are going to start eatingmore plants, people are going

(48:52):
to have uh, ran through thewildlife, the edible wildlife,
and when you start plantingtoday, you don't get your first
growth on many fruits for months.
So you've got problems tocontend with.

Speaker 3 (49:06):
Yeah, and that's why, guys, the best food source in
the apocalypse is other people.

Speaker 1 (49:11):
No, put up signs.

Speaker 3 (49:12):
Say hey, here's a safe area, Everybody head here.

Speaker 1 (49:15):
You know where they're heading.
You sound like that group inthe Walking Dead.

Speaker 2 (49:20):
Terminus yep, Also like that group in the Walking
Dead.
Terminus yep, Also like thatgroup in the Last of Us.

Speaker 3 (49:24):
Dude.
That scene in the Walking Deadis fire, though when frickin'
Rick's telling him where he hidthe bag, he's like there's AKs
and whatever, and then there's amachete with a red handle.

Speaker 1 (49:36):
That's what I'm gonna use to kill you, I'm gonna use
to kill you with.
And he did I like that, I tokill you with, and he did I like
that.
I like that one too.
I made you a promise.
So any final thoughts?

Speaker 2 (49:49):
I'll say it again I hate that.
I liked it.

Speaker 3 (49:55):
At least 100 children I could get through before they
take over.

Speaker 2 (49:57):
You are horribly overestimating your endurance.

Speaker 3 (50:01):
Doc, you don't know If a gorilla can't take on 100
men.

Speaker 2 (50:07):
you cannot take on 100 kids.
Okay, but give me some crack,I'll do it.

Speaker 3 (50:11):
I'll do it real quick , bare handed.
Bare handed with some crack,yeah, maybe.

Speaker 2 (50:17):
My odds might change.

Speaker 1 (50:18):
Okay, so here's the real question Crack feet versus
100 third graders Hold on, wesaid we came to the conclusion
that we believed 100 men wouldbe able to take down a gorilla,
and at no point did we stipulatethat the men were not afraid in
any wise.
We anticipated that there washesitation.

(50:41):
No, that there was hesitationno, that there was.

Speaker 2 (50:42):
No.
We said it would have to be.
It would have to be a hundredmen who have, no, no regard for
their own safety.

Speaker 3 (50:51):
Yeah, it's, either it's either they fight this
gorilla or they get shot in theface.
Well, yeah, but nonethelessthey're not watch.
They're not zombies?

Speaker 1 (50:59):
well, they're not just charging at this thing with
no fear.
There's still fear.
We put the same exact parameteron it 100 zombie men, one
gorilla no chance, gorillastoast.

Speaker 2 (51:11):
I don't think the gorilla wins.
If all 100 men felt that theirlives were in danger and they
had to fight for their life,then yes, I think the 100 men
definitely win If it's just 100average men thrown in there
there.
I think once you watch 20 to 30men get obliterated in 20
seconds but my point is don'tfight anyone.

Speaker 1 (51:28):
A hundred zombie men, no regard for their life, not a
thought, not there is nobacking off if a hundred men win
, a hundred zombie men win.

Speaker 2 (51:36):
I think that's.
I think that's easy.

Speaker 1 (51:38):
There's no way you're taking.

Speaker 2 (51:39):
Yeah, there's no way he takes out 100 kids.
That's easy.
So there's no way you're taking100 kids yeah there's no way he
takes out 100 kids.

Speaker 3 (51:44):
That's not happening, and that's why this episode is
sponsored by Mr Beast.
Mr Beast, please give me $1,000.

Speaker 2 (51:48):
Bring out the 100 kids.
Bring out the 100 kids.

Speaker 1 (51:51):
Find us 100 infected children.

Speaker 2 (51:55):
Everybody turn on your Spotify.
Bring us 100 cancer kids Wow.
All right, never mind no cancer, kids wow no he interrupted my
good joke to say that what wasyour joke?

Speaker 3 (52:08):
I don't even remember anymore.

Speaker 2 (52:10):
At least 150 cancer kids, jesus you should end this
and just give me the win now youare freaking terrible.

Speaker 3 (52:21):
I'm here to make people laugh from my absurdity,
so I think I'm I'm working it,it's working this was a pretty
absurd movie it was, uh, it'salso very I traumatizing the
baby scene, the noises I reallydon't like that.
I really did not like it reallydid not like that, and then it
was a zombie already, so I wasjust like zombie baby yeah.

Speaker 2 (52:44):
Apparently, this movie flunked in the box office.
Oh my God, it flunked so hard.

Speaker 3 (52:49):
dude $2 million budget.
Do you know how much they madeback?
No idea $500,000.

Speaker 2 (52:55):
Oh dang, but like.
So.
Here's the thing.
This was not that bad of amovie.

Speaker 3 (53:10):
It was like it was one of those movies where it's
like it's bad but it's so badit's good, it's very well made,
it's a funny movie.
It's stupid, but it's funny.
It doesn't deserve to be thatbad like d-list actors and all I
could say is you know, but Iliked it.

Speaker 2 (53:18):
I thought, like rean wilson was great.
I I'm not going to lie, oh,elijah Wood is his name.
I thought they were great.
I thought it was good choices.
I can't believe this movieactually funked that hard.

Speaker 1 (53:28):
I wish.
I mean I like the fact thatDwight got to be the hero.
Yeah, that's going to be my newtagline now.

Speaker 3 (53:35):
Anybody order a badass Battlestar Galactica?

Speaker 1 (53:39):
Who's going to hit them with the socials?

Speaker 2 (53:41):
Oh well, you could follow us at Will you Survive?
The podcast on most of oursocials, I believe.
That's our TikTok, that's ourInstagram, that's our, not our
ex.

Speaker 3 (53:54):
Our ex is Alex and Eric.

Speaker 2 (53:57):
W-I-S.
Yeah, thanks for interruptingme and throwing that in there,
like I didn't know that I meanyou sounded very unsure and the
Gmail is theboys atwillyousurvivethepodcastcom.

Speaker 3 (54:09):
Send us an email.
We will read it on you.

Speaker 2 (54:11):
Shut the fuck up.
That's T-H-E-B-O-W-S.
Fuck you.
T-h-e-b-o-y-s atwillyousurvivethepodcast Go.
T-h-e-b-o-y-s at Will youSurvive the Podcast.

Speaker 1 (54:24):
Go on T-H-E-B-O-Y-S at.
Will you Survive the Podcast?

Speaker 3 (54:27):
If you like gaming, you can check us out at WIS
Gaming on TikTok.

Speaker 2 (54:33):
Yeah, and follow that .
Tj threw me off my rhythm.
It's all his fault.
I hate him.

Speaker 3 (54:38):
I feel like you're over here falling asleep, dude.
I'm up, I'm ready.
I feel like you're over herefalling asleep, dude.
I'm up, I'm ready.
I am literally awake andspeaking.
You literally were laying backwith your eyes closed like two
seconds ago.

Speaker 2 (54:48):
I heard everything you said.
I'm just sweating my balls offand ready for this episode to
end.

Speaker 1 (54:53):
Okay, I have points here I like spending time with
you guys.
I like spending time with youtoo.
All right, I got points here,but I do want to know, for
influence points, what's yournext movie?

Speaker 2 (55:07):
I have no idea.
I mean, what do you want towatch?

Speaker 3 (55:12):
Like I really want to do Cast Away.
It's been on my list for solong.
It is such a good survivalmovie.

Speaker 1 (55:21):
Cast Away Okay.

Speaker 3 (55:22):
Cast Away.
We are Cast.

Speaker 1 (55:23):
Away All right long it is such a good survival movie
.
Castaways, okay, castaway, weare castaways, all right, and
and of course, mellow wants usto do zombies oh, zombie verse
well, all right, I do have, uh,the point tally and I I'm
actually giving TJ the moviepoint tally.

(55:43):
So, tj, yes, you are thiswinner.

Speaker 3 (55:46):
I am a winner.

Speaker 1 (55:48):
You are the winner.
Oh that was very anticlimacticyeah dude, let's go, mr.

Speaker 2 (55:53):
Beast hit me up.

Speaker 3 (55:54):
We could really do that video idea.
I feel like it would beunproblematic.

Speaker 2 (55:59):
Unproblematic.
Yeah, that's the adjective Iwould use.

Speaker 3 (56:01):
Yeah, unproblematic.
Yeah, that's the adjective Iwould use, or if you could see,
somehow I feel like 100 littlepeople.

Speaker 1 (56:09):
No, here's what I think that's worse.
It kind of is.

Speaker 3 (56:14):
Yeah, okay, how many little people you think you
could take on?
I feel like 20.

Speaker 2 (56:21):
Me.
I could maybe take on like 10,and most of that would just be
me running away.

Speaker 1 (56:28):
Whoa.
Internet I don't think I couldtake on any, because I think
they are my equal.
Yeah, that's right.
What?

Speaker 2 (56:35):
are you blind?

Speaker 1 (56:36):
That's right, I just went PC on, you fuckers.

Speaker 2 (56:39):
What are you blind?

Speaker 1 (56:40):
Uh-huh.
You don't see height yep, nope,I I am, I am ableist blind.
This guy's the guy in thezombie apocalypse he's gonna be
advocating for zombie rights ofyou, you people zombies gotta
eat

Speaker 2 (56:58):
yeah, yeah, uh, yeah, you yeah you are gotta eat.
You are speaking like you wouldbe one of those advocates who
are like they they're justhungry.
They're just hungry why don'tyou just let them get a nibble?

Speaker 1 (57:09):
okay, okay, but hear me out, hear me out, hear me out
I don't think anybody couldargue with this?
I don't think anybody's gonnaargue with this.

Speaker 2 (57:16):
Just feed them pedophiles yeah, I mean yeah,
well, like feed them pedophiles.
And yeah, I mean yeah, well,like hear me out.

Speaker 1 (57:24):
Feed them.
Pedophiles and people that wantto beat 100 children.

Speaker 2 (57:26):
It's the new Chris Hansen show.

Speaker 3 (57:29):
That's crazy.
I didn't even do it, yeah, but.

Speaker 2 (57:37):
It'll be the new zombie.

Speaker 3 (57:38):
Chris Hansen show 25-year-old man breaks into
middle school and startsfighting the whole fifth grade
class.

Speaker 1 (57:51):
He is captured on camera saying see, josh, I can
take all fifth graders.

Speaker 2 (57:57):
When officers asked him why he did it, his response
was, and I quote fuck them kids.

Speaker 3 (58:04):
Fuck them kids.
And on that note end thisepisode.

Speaker 1 (58:12):
We thank you all for joining us for this episode.
Please tune in to all of oursocials.
Go over to our profiles.
Give us a whole bunch of likes,comments, follows, shares, all
that good stuff and vibes.
Please help us get the podcastout and check us out on any of
the platforms.
You don't have to only listento the one you're listening to
right now.
Go check out one of the otherones, like Apple Podcasts or

(58:36):
Spotify or TuneIn, if you'venever tuned in.

Speaker 2 (58:39):
Yeah, they're all super, super, super different.

Speaker 1 (58:44):
And you should definitely, definitely listen to
every single one of them,because I'm pretty sure it's
tune in.
That's alexa and you can sayalexa, play, will you survive
the podcast?
And guess what?
She'll fucking do it.

Speaker 3 (58:49):
There's easter eggs and all the different platforms.
You just gotta listen and youknow what?

Speaker 1 (58:54):
wait, hang on, let's not make promises with all of
that, I just have TJ to say onelast thing to all of our lovely
listeners my, my, my truck has adual real dual, dual, dual,
dual, dual real dual.

Speaker 3 (59:16):
Do do it survive?

Speaker 1 (59:19):
not bad, not bad, that was good, thank you.