Will You Survive "The Shallows": A Giant Shark and Steven Seagull

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Our latest episode of "Will You Survive" features an electrifying face-off between Blake lively and a giant hungry shark. join us as we unravel her survival strategies and answer the question "Will You Survive" The Shallows?

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:26):
Hello survivors and welcome to another episode of
Will you Survive.

Speaker 2 (00:31):
The Podcast.

Speaker 1 (00:33):
Where we go over survival scenarios, usually
using the screen and ourfavorite movies.
We're doing something a littlebit different.
But before we get intointroducing our movie, let me
introduce our co-hosts.
We have Eric.
Hello, I'm Eric, and we have TJ.

Speaker 2 (00:51):
What is up?

Speaker 1 (00:52):
What is up Los Angeles?
We know.

Speaker 3 (00:55):
We know Smoke, smoke everywhere we know, from space
you can see it.
Oh yeah, actually wait a minute.
This is I'm going to date theepisode this is dated.
It is January 10th, 10th, 10th,the world is on fire all around
us.

Speaker 2 (01:12):
The world is on fire.
I'm breathing clean air overhere.

Speaker 1 (01:15):
Yeah, he's fine.
It's not as bad today, are you?

Speaker 3 (01:19):
kidding me, I'm seeing videos it's orange.
It's orange, it's red, it lookslike On an actual serious note.

Speaker 1 (01:27):
It was like really really really really red
yesterday, today it's likeorange.

Speaker 3 (01:31):
On an actual, serious note, there are two very large
fires going on right now theEaton Fire and the Palisades
Fire.
Both are very severe and Ibelieve, as of now, 11 lives
have been taken andapproximately $150 billion of

(01:53):
economic loss was the estimatesthat I was seeing and two entire
cities have completely burneddown to the ground.

Speaker 2 (02:01):
And that is not an exaggeration.

Speaker 3 (02:03):
These companies are canceling firing shots I will
say I genuinely, if we're gonnago down that route, I don't
blame the insurance companies,because they've been telling the
state for the last like fuckingfive years that these places
are unsafe and it's not.
It doesn't make any sense toinsure these places when it's
almost guaranteed to burn down,and then we saw it happen not

(02:24):
that it wasn't, not that itdoesn't make sense to insure it.

Speaker 1 (02:27):
It's, it's not why are you?
Capping us.
You're not allowing us tocharge what we need to charge in
order to cover this.
So they stopped.
So they stopped.

Speaker 3 (02:36):
But then so california comes in and is like
well then, we'll create a statefunded insurance.
Of course that allows you to doit, except anyways.
But my point is not to to pointfingers, even though I really
want to.
Um, my point is that there area lot of people who are actually
very devastated by this fire.
Um, alex and I live a littlebit uncomfortably close to one

(02:58):
of those fires, but we have notbeen evacuated.
We are, as far as we know, weare fine they're not gonna be no
we're fine.

Speaker 2 (03:05):
No, actually, well, I mean kinda, but no anyways,
they live in a cardboard box onuh yeah, we actually don't live
anywhere near the fires thattake a bit well, we live in the
trees.

Speaker 1 (03:20):
They live in north carolina living in a cardboard
box right outside of downtown LAis still like $1.2 million.

Speaker 3 (03:29):
Yeah, I pay like a $3,000 rent okay.

Speaker 2 (03:32):
That's a four-bedroom apartment.

Speaker 3 (03:34):
Yeah, that's a cardboard box actually.
I have plumbing, though.

Speaker 2 (03:38):
You can add additions .

Speaker 1 (03:40):
If you get permitted.

Speaker 2 (03:41):
As many cars as you want in the garage.

Speaker 1 (03:44):
And every permit costs $1.2 million.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (03:47):
Let me tell you the brilliance of Burbank government
really quick.
My boss has a.
He had a fence, right.
The fence line went up to acertain point.
He decided to replace thatfence with an actual, like 10
foot tall metal gate, uh, orlike metal fence, so the dogs

(04:10):
can't jump over it.
Well then, bourbon came overand said um, that gate that you
have is actually on cityproperty and you need to push
that gate back two feet.
And he was like but this iswhere the original gate was.
And they're like yeah, that wasokay because it was pre before.
We said that's not okay, butnow that you changed, it.

(04:32):
It has to do with aestheticsyeah, I was like well, here's
the thing, it's literally just arandom indent.
It was a flat wall, now it justrandomly indents.

Speaker 1 (04:42):
Weird, weird it looks stupid it is, but they do this
thing where it's completebureaucracy, it's called.

Speaker 3 (04:49):
Just the gate.
We lost a good chunk of yardspace because of it too, and it
looks dumber to have it this way.
Why would you tell us that wehave to have it this way?
And there's nobody you can goto to say, hey, this is dumb,
right, and for them to be like,yeah, that is dumb, you're right
.
Just build it this way.

(05:09):
Bureaucracy, it's allbureaucracy.
But anyway, my whole point isthat we don't normally, you know
, we joke about it.
We try not to date theseepisodes, but this is going to
release, probably like two weekslate.
People are still devastated.
A lot of homes were burned down, a lot of people lost their
homes, so we had uh if you feelgracious, look at those funds

(05:29):
and, uh like those gofundmes,and you know, I'm sure people
would appreciate that we had alot of fires.

Speaker 1 (05:36):
Oh god, we had a lot of fires all around us.
At one point, there were firesto the north, south, east and
west of us it was six fires,fires.

Speaker 2 (05:43):
There were five fires surrounding us, and the fucking
wind is the issue.

Speaker 1 (05:47):
What I was.
I mean it was, we were getting100-mile-per-hour gusts.

Speaker 3 (05:50):
Well, I think it capped at 80.
I think they kept saying itwould be 100, but I think 80 is
what it maxed out at.

Speaker 1 (05:57):
Either way that's ridiculous.

Speaker 3 (05:58):
That's prime fire conditions.

Speaker 1 (06:00):
The part for me that I came on.
I talked to some of the folksin the live on Wednesday and it
was good practice.
You know, we were close to theevacuation lines.
They were getting close tocalling our zone.
They had zoned us out inseveral of the apps.
The city that's where I waslooking.
The city had us zoned out andwas waiting for one or another

(06:25):
thing to go wrong and they weregoing to start evacuating more
and more.
Thankfully for us, we were onthe far side of the the city to
the fire, um.
But you know, like I said,there was another fire that
cropped up to the south of us.
That was really close.
Uh, when you talk about mileage, we were only about seven miles
from the fire line to the eastof us and we were only about
three miles to the fire line tothe east of us and we were only

(06:45):
about three miles to the fireline to the south of us.
It's just that in Los Angeles,driving anywhere takes at least
40 minutes.

Speaker 3 (06:53):
Yeah, that's a 30-minute drive, typically
Probably like 20 minutes rightabout now that it's late.

Speaker 1 (06:59):
So it's a fake feeling that it's far away.

Speaker 3 (07:02):
No, it was quite literally on the other side of a
hill from us, granted a bighill.
Some might call it a mountain.
It's not a mountain, it's ahill, but it's big enough that
you can't see over it from wherewe are.
It's the Griffith Hill.
It's massive, but it's righthere.
Yeah, it was the Sunset Fire.
It was right on the other side.

(07:23):
I have a lot of employees wholive in that kind of general
area.
That's a very scary.
That's a scary proximity topeople position where you have
to.

Speaker 1 (07:33):
You have to pull out your your bug out bag.
You have to go through all ofyour gear.
You have to pack your, yourbags and stuff.
You want to be ready all thetime.
Uh, some of the clothes thatyou have that you're going to

(07:54):
give away to goodwill or orthrow away or whatever, don't
put them in go bags, don'tdonate.
What are you stupid?
I mean, you could keep you know, you could donate most of it,
but keep you know at two, threeoutfits socks, extra shoes,
throw them in your go bags andbe ready to roll.
And although it was a terriblesituation to be in, I really did

(08:16):
feel a lot better about havingall of the stuff ready to go and
I could grab my babies and haulout of here in no time flat.
I didn't need to.
I didn't need to do anything,and that's the purpose of having
your stuff in accessible places.
That included our importantdocuments.
I made sure I had my renter'sinsurance documents.

(08:38):
I made sure I had socialsecurity cards.
I had my driver's license on me, my wife had hers on her cards.
I had my driver's license on me, my wife had hers on her, and
we had our marriage certificate,my baby's social security cards
as well, and I was able to justgrab everything, put it all in
the go bag and we're on the move.

(08:59):
So we talk about this all thetime.
We use the silver screen, ifyou will.
We use the lens of cinema sothat we're not trying to
fearmonger people.
This is supposed to be fun, andif you do it repetitively, it
is fun.
It is something that you cancheck your go bag and look into
what do I have, what do I need,what do I need to replace?
And the more you do that, themore current you keep everything

(09:22):
, and it's just good for you,good practice, so that you're
not getting, shall we say, stale.

Speaker 3 (09:30):
I don't want to use that word.
I mean yeah, because when it istime at some point Okay, I say
that because we live inCalifornia and every single
summer there's multiple fireshappening Because you're in.

Speaker 2 (09:43):
New York yes, yeah, so it multiple fires happening
Because you're in New Jersey.

Speaker 3 (09:45):
Yes, yeah, so it's not shocking.
So what would happen is thatevery time.
Are you okay?

Speaker 1 (09:51):
I just saw I could be tripping but it looks like
flare-ups.
But I think that's a light.
Nope, that was a flare-up.
It's gone, it's out.
I think somebody set a fire Onthe Griffith Hill.
I think somebody set a fire Onthe Griffith.

Speaker 3 (10:04):
Hill.
Yeah, am I tripping?

Speaker 1 (10:04):
That's not just a light, do you see it?
It's flaring up and then goingout.
It's really bright right now.

Speaker 3 (10:09):
You're not looking right at it and then it goes
dark, it goes dim, it's lowering, but yeah guys Hang on TJ,
they're tweaking no Bro becauseif there's a fire on the
Griffith Hill, then that'sactually incredibly dangerous
for us.
I don't think that's a fire.
That's way too bright of alight to be a fire.

(10:30):
That's like a flashlight.

Speaker 1 (10:32):
That's bizarre.
Well, I'll just keep no,because it keeps changing.
You don't think it could?

Speaker 3 (10:35):
be the traffic lights , definitely, definitely.

Speaker 1 (10:38):
There's cars going in front of it.
You see the cars passing infront of it.

Speaker 3 (10:41):
Well, you see the cars passing in front of it.
Well, okay, hang on, Let meopen up the fucking window so we
stop looking through glasswhich is refracting off the
light Guys.

Speaker 2 (10:47):
we got to keep recording so that we can get
famous off this.
This could be the fire episode.

Speaker 1 (10:52):
This is the stuff that you want to keep yourself
stocked and ready.
Well, I know it's a road.

Speaker 3 (10:58):
No, those are cars passing through.
That's what those lights are.
That's why, it keeps changing.

Speaker 1 (11:02):
No, I know that there's cars passing that way.
That's not a car facing me.

Speaker 3 (11:07):
Yes, because I just saw the red line going the
opposite way.

Speaker 2 (11:10):
No, I'm telling you they're literally car lights.
Guys, as you can tell, they'revery stressed about the
situation.

Speaker 3 (11:18):
I mean it's just close.

Speaker 2 (11:19):
To have your bug out bag is to have it prepared for
your particular situation.
For them they should beprepared for fires, earthquakes,
uh stuff like that.
Uh, you know in for like firesand stuff.
It's good to have like masksfor like the smoke, because the
the air quality does get prettybad.
But for your particular stateand situation you're going to

(11:40):
want to have different thingslike if you live in tornado,
alley fucking stay, stay in yourbasement, you know like I don't
know, that's just true.
Fires don't really happen uphere other than like the summer,
um, but you know it's prettymoist wet as hell up there, kind
of kind of going back weactually have a rainforest over
here, so that's true.

Speaker 3 (12:00):
going back to what I was saying earlier, we always
have fires like all the time,all year round, and, uh, every
time there's a fire going on,like up by Sacramento, all the
time, every one of my friendswho doesn't live in California
message me, are you okay?
And I'm like that is like eighthours from me.
I am very much Okay.
It's usually, uh, nobodyusually up.

(12:20):
Nobody messaged me about thesefires.
There are six fires in la andnobody has one person now about
the fire.
I was like one person hasfinally messaged me and been
like hey, are you okay?
Actually no two people.
Rosie did first, I got messageda lot but, then I had another
friend who was like are you okay?
And I was like yeah, I'm, I'mfine, but man, the amount of
people who always message meanytime any fucking earthquake

(12:42):
or fire happens here, and nowthat it's actually close to me
nobody says anything.

Speaker 2 (12:46):
Hey, I messaged you about the earthquake.
I talk to you every day, so ifsomething's happening, I would
know.

Speaker 3 (12:50):
Josh did ask if we were okay.
Josh actually did too.
You're right, yeah.

Speaker 2 (12:55):
Josh, you're not valid.
You were missing for like weeks.

Speaker 1 (12:58):
He's sick.
Well, he went to Vegas and thenwhen he got back he was sick
excuses.
So with all of that, we justwanted to give a proper shout
out to, uh, everybody who'ssuffering something.
We know they're not listeningright now, but you know, keep
them in your thoughts and uh,everybody goes through stuff and
that that reminds us all beprepared for the zombie

(13:20):
apocalypse and you're preparedfor anything well, you know what
I I would like to think.

Speaker 3 (13:25):
I would like to think I I doubt it, but maybe
somebody is listening to usafter that whole situation oh,
maybe just trying to get a smileand that makes me happy and I
would like to do that well then,let's let him smile off bitch I
mean, let's bring a smileeverything.
You're trying to fucking winddown for the night and you know,
just put on a podcast.

Speaker 1 (13:47):
We're gonna bring a smile right now a hotel we'll
just shut the fuck up.

Speaker 3 (13:53):
Shelters homie.

Speaker 2 (13:54):
This guy is trying shout out to our fan living in a
motel six right now.
Our thoughts and prayers go outto you, um and I mean that.

Speaker 3 (14:02):
You know what.
You know what it like anasshole.
Here's the worst part.

Speaker 1 (14:05):
TJ is such a dick that he doesn't even realize
that we actually could havesomebody like that, and he's
making fun of him.

Speaker 2 (14:11):
Exactly no, I'm trying to make him laugh.

Speaker 3 (14:13):
What a jerk you know.
What's funny is like I feellike he is saying it sincerely.
He just sounds like a dicksaying it right now.

Speaker 2 (14:26):
I I'm not the one with the crispy house, I'm just
trying to fucking Because hesays shit like that.
I can't relate.
It's wet up here I live next toa lake.

Speaker 3 (14:32):
He's like bro, just have rain.

Speaker 2 (14:35):
Just have water.
I don't know what to tell you.
We tried.
Okay, put the fish Jump in thepool.
Y'all got pools over there.
I play GTA 5.

Speaker 1 (14:42):
Well, we do have pools, yeah.
Now listen, we're going tobring a smile to people's faces.

Speaker 2 (14:47):
Speaking of water, good segue.
I don't know what your thoughtprocess is on this but, as we do
talk about water.

Speaker 1 (14:54):
Blake Lively in a wetsuit Fuck and a bikini Fuck,
and we know how TJ feels aboutit.
After we did.
What was that one with?
Okay, we get it.
What was Jim from the office?
What was that movie?

Speaker 3 (15:10):
A Quiet Place.

Speaker 1 (15:13):
We know how TJ feels about her.

Speaker 3 (15:14):
So, I know his name.
Is that the?

Speaker 2 (15:18):
wrong actress.
Yeah, blake Lively is RyanReynolds' girl.

Speaker 1 (15:21):
Oh yeah, wait, yeah, you're right.
Who's that one?
John Krasinski was Emily Blunt.
Emily Blunt.

Speaker 3 (15:25):
John.

Speaker 2 (15:25):
Krasinski, john Krasinski and Emily Blunt yeah.

Speaker 3 (15:28):
You're mixing the wrong white girls.

Speaker 1 (15:30):
That was very racist.
I just mix two white girls.
That was incredibly racist.
You really like?

Speaker 3 (15:36):
a lot of them look the same.
I don't know, but like you, youracist motherfuckers.
You can tell my preference, I'mwhite Warning I'm white.
Only half.
That doesn't count right now.
You don't get to take whateverside fits you best.
You know what I?

Speaker 2 (15:50):
do get to decide whether or not I can say some
shit, because my wife is in facta beautiful white woman.

Speaker 3 (15:57):
That is crazy.
You know what Capital?

Speaker 2 (15:59):
H motherfucker.

Speaker 3 (16:05):
Black people are the only people who could be mixed
with something and claim bothsides.
I can't go to mexico and claimmexican.
They fucking don't think theydon't they don't agree.
Damn gringo, they don't know,if I go to germany and I'm like,
bro, I'm part german, they'd belike, yeah, we believe that.
Yeah, we'll take you in.

Speaker 1 (16:16):
You can't go to fucking olive garden and walk
into the kitchen and say you'remexican no, they wouldn't.

Speaker 3 (16:21):
You don't need to go to mexico.
Yeah, I'm okay.
Okay, you don't have to take itthat far.

Speaker 1 (16:26):
Go to the chinese food restaurant and walk into
the back and tell them you'remexican.
And well, I mean that seemspointless.

Speaker 3 (16:32):
They're real mexican, that's true everybody.

Speaker 1 (16:37):
Every kitchen is a mexican in la.

Speaker 3 (16:39):
Yeah, that's now that's why they're so scared
about Never mind Back to thewrong white girl.

Speaker 1 (16:46):
We're going to go to the right white girl for me.
Blake Lively in a bikini.
God, this is.

Speaker 2 (16:53):
In a wetsuit.
It got a little bad in themiddle of the movie.
I was like I feel bad for hercheeks, you know, because she
has a whole chunk out of her legbut it's fine.

Speaker 1 (17:02):
It was really bad.
The movie is terrible.

Speaker 3 (17:06):
What do you mean?
This?

Speaker 2 (17:07):
movie is amazing.
I will tell you.

Speaker 3 (17:09):
Yeah, I think you're going to have a bad time here.
Host.

Speaker 1 (17:11):
Here we are In the taut thriller the Shallows.
When Nancy Blake Lively issurfing on a secluded beach, she
finds herself on the feedingground of a great white shark.
Though she's stranded only 200yards from shore, survival
proves to be the ultimate testof wills, requiring all of
nancy's ingenuity,resourcefulness and fortitude

(17:33):
and superpowers I'm gonna saythis from the start okay, I'm
talking shit, because there isnot a surfer on the planet who
goes to a beach and just jumpsin the water without scanning
the shoreline she did, actuallyshe did scan it in the beginning
.
How did this giant freakingcarcass, bro?
It just showed up.
Yeah, that doesn't happen.

Speaker 3 (17:54):
No, it just showed up .
That doesn't happen.

Speaker 2 (17:56):
It does now like just floated up you know like what
exactly just dude.

Speaker 1 (18:02):
Okay, there's two things that were wrong with it,
two major things.
A carcass like that at theshore is gonna have carrion
birds all over it.
It did well.
I had seagulls, which you standon the shoreline and you look
and be like wait a minute, whatthe hell is that?

Speaker 3 (18:17):
they were having so much fun surfing that they just
got so caught up in the vibe, socaught up in the moment, guys,
she was by herself.

Speaker 1 (18:25):
No, her and the two dudes.

Speaker 3 (18:26):
You gotta remember they were so caught up in it,
bruh, and then they left and shewas like I'm just trying to
catch that last wave, bruh, andthen she gets on it.
And then that's when she waslike oh whoa, in like the last
four hours or so this whale musthave shown up, but we didn't
even know.
Guys, this was mostly shot in apool.

Speaker 2 (18:44):
Okay, everybody knew that, everybody believed that
okay, so you gotta suspend youryour disbelief here that you
know, she is blonde.

Speaker 3 (18:53):
So okay, but the other two guys aren't, so I
think your argument's fallingapart.
But I, I, I get your point.

Speaker 2 (18:59):
I'm with you if you were accident, okay I, I'm with
you.

Speaker 3 (19:04):
besides that last point, they're like come over
here gringa, I've got to givepoints here.

Speaker 1 (19:09):
Nerdy vet makes a good point.
How the fuck does he get points?
600 points for Blake Lively.
Okay, well, she's winning.
She might be the host of thenext episode.

Speaker 3 (19:19):
She has to come on.
She has to do it, she has to.
That's how it works.

Speaker 1 (19:22):
You have to be on the podcast.

Speaker 2 (19:23):
That's how we get celebrities to come on.

Speaker 3 (19:25):
We just tell them they have to.

Speaker 2 (19:26):
I know you live in California but I need you to
come up to Washington to do theactual interviewing section.

Speaker 3 (19:33):
No, she can come over here.
It's way closer.
We're here in LA.
No, it's okay, we'll host her.
And we're far less threateningsleeps on a single mattress.
Uh, I got a.
I got a king size in the otherroom, so I have, you'll have.
I have no delusions that I'mway too young.
For her I got a cute cat andalex is married, so we won't,
you know, stare at you awkwardly.

(19:55):
I'm also not the one who justsaid I was staring at your
cheeks while you were dying in amovie now I will say this.

Speaker 1 (20:00):
I will say this to blake lively.
I will say this.
I'm going to admit this.
My wife will stare at youawkwardly.

Speaker 3 (20:06):
That is actually true .

Speaker 1 (20:08):
She loves Blake Lively, my wife will also stare
at you awkwardly.
Differently, differently Kindof gay.

Speaker 2 (20:16):
So, Blake Lively, come over to my house.
I love you.

Speaker 3 (20:19):
I don't like Dwayne Johnson.
You really bolstered your case.

Speaker 2 (20:21):
You're ten times better than Dwayne Johnson, to
be honest.

Speaker 3 (20:25):
Oh, now she's going to come over Gosh well, just ten
times, just ten times.

Speaker 2 (20:29):
Just ten times.
That's not much of a compliment, okay.

Speaker 1 (20:33):
Now I'm going to say Half the episode is about fire.

Speaker 2 (20:39):
Half is about Blake Lively.

Speaker 3 (20:42):
The AI is going to be so confused when it writes this
description.
It's like when blake livelyjoins.
Will you survive the podcast?

Speaker 1 (20:54):
I like that, I like it.

Speaker 3 (20:57):
This is good, this is good.
Uh, this one may never see thelight of day, but we'll see.
Oh no, it will.

Speaker 1 (21:02):
This it will.
This is going on.
So what we're?
Oh, I like this one.
Sorry, nerdy.
Nerdy vet makes a point here.
Minus 200 against TJ forbegging.
That is pretty cringe, bro.
We don't beg, anybody Can't lie, that's it's just.
We just set the rules RightWhoever gets the most points has
to host the next episode.

Speaker 2 (21:22):
I didn't know Nerdy was racist.

Speaker 1 (21:24):
This isn't about begging.

Speaker 2 (21:31):
He hates white people .

Speaker 3 (21:32):
I didn't know that.
What the fuck, NerdyVan?

Speaker 2 (21:34):
Just because I am a Caucasian male, you think I am
insuperior?

Speaker 1 (21:40):
It's okay, it's trendy to hate white people.
I'm not white Warning.

Speaker 3 (21:43):
A cop walks up to.
Tj and and teaches like I'mwhite right now and he's like,
ah, damn it, I almost got youwalks away.

Speaker 1 (21:50):
He's like all right, you have a good tomorrow tj says
get him tj says warning,warning, I'm black on the on the
podcast right, and all of asudden you see this cop peeking
on the side of the screen no,wait, wait.

Speaker 3 (22:03):
That cop pulls him over and he's like I'm white
right now and he's like damn it.
And then he's like, but hang on, pulls out his phone.
Is this you?

Speaker 1 (22:11):
warning.
Warning I'm black.

Speaker 3 (22:14):
No, are you tj from?
Will you survive the podcast?

Speaker 2 (22:17):
that was, that's me previously officer.
I have uh changed.
Okay, my credit score is.
This is another funny one.

Speaker 1 (22:23):
Curious george says you guys are all living
advertisement for adhdmedication.
I mean I will say that they areget the fuck off my back.
Curious george I'm better.

Speaker 2 (22:34):
I'm undiagnosed, I'm undiagnosed.

Speaker 3 (22:37):
I'm undiagnosed bipolar actually I'm tiktok
diagnosed, so that's prettyofficial can we get back?

Speaker 1 (22:45):
to blake lively uh who oh yeah, the next host of.
Will you survive the podcast?
Yeah, wow, that I mean, I don'tknow.
I okay.
So since we're not going to getback to blake lively, can we
start talking about, um, I don'tknow, the shallows?

Speaker 2 (23:01):
the radioactive shark an idiot for going out uh in
the surf after the two diveswere leaving.
She's like I'm going to catchone, last one the water is still
.
You're freaking retarded.
Not only that.

Speaker 1 (23:12):
Not only that.
The other thing that I have amajor issue with is let's ignore
the sharks, right, because,being attacked by a shark, you
have a better chance of beingstruck by lightning.
But let's ignore the shark, butshe was on its feeding ground.

Speaker 3 (23:25):
So that changes things completely.

Speaker 1 (23:27):
I get it, but let's ignore the shark.
Okay, is there any surfer outthere?
There's not.
I'm telling you ahead of time.
This is spoiler alert.
The answer Watch me.
There is no surfer on theplanet who does not understand
that the ocean by itself,without sharks, whales, animals
of any kind, is deadly as fuck.
The ocean can kill you veryeasily.

Speaker 3 (23:52):
Wrong.
There are surfers, and it's theones who are dead.

Speaker 1 (23:57):
No, they knew and they still did it Actually.

Speaker 2 (24:03):
I knew the guy best surfer best surfer in the world.

Speaker 3 (24:07):
Everybody thinks so name him, he's dead name him.
He's dead.
Name him ted dublinski.
Shut up, mark foo.
You never heard of teddublinski.
No wow, what a surfer this guyis am I right?

Speaker 2 (24:21):
I have um thalassophobia.
Never catch me nobody nobodycares.

Speaker 3 (24:27):
I don't even know what that was.
That's how much of a pussy shit,that was yes okay, I'm not
gonna lie, okay, so, so here'sthe thing I understand when
people are afraid of the ocean,because most people are afraid
of the unknown below, likemostly sea creatures, you know,
sharks, usually, things likethat.
Here's the thing I can swim.

(24:47):
I can swim pretty decently,like I have good endurance.
Do you guys think you couldswim over the Mariana's trench?
Okay, now, that one's tough forme, because we know for a fact
there is nothing alive in theMariana trench.
Yeah, there is Nothing.
Noiana Trench yeah, there isNothing.
No, no, no, there's plenty,there's plenty of living things.

(25:08):
No, okay, there are no bigcreatures there are heat vents.
There are like snails, there'splankton and bacteria, that kind
of living stuff You're talkingabout at the deep, all the way
down.
There's no giant shark at thebottom of the Marianas Trench.

Speaker 2 (25:26):
That's what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 (25:28):
You don't know that.

Speaker 2 (25:30):
I'm going to call Jason right now.

Speaker 1 (25:32):
Who the fuck is Jason ?
Jason Statham, it didn't comeout of the Marianas Trench.

Speaker 3 (25:38):
Yes, it did.

Speaker 1 (25:41):
It came out of the bottom of the Marianas Trench.

Speaker 3 (25:42):
It just came out of the ocean.

Speaker 1 (25:44):
The Marianas Trench, no Dude.

Speaker 3 (25:47):
It came out.
I promise you it wasn't theMariana stretch.

Speaker 2 (25:51):
Keep promising, keep promising it was the Electro
like electromagnetic rocks atthe bottom of the ocean that
produce oxygen.
Buddy but we have scanned, butthey're not alive or nothing.

Speaker 3 (26:02):
We came out of the trench.
We have scanned the entireMariana's trench.
We know there is nothing inthere.
I'm being real for a second,okay.
Do you think you could swimacross it?
I don't think I can.
I think it's a pure mentalthing, okay that's how I will
about.

Speaker 2 (26:19):
I will answer.

Speaker 1 (26:20):
I will answer your question with a visual that
everybody can go and look up forthemselves.
Uh, because that is a greatpoint.
I'm not even going to go as faras saying the marianas trench,
okay, but this thing right here,I could not swim over this
thing.
You and tj can see it, and thenI'm going to tell the audience

(26:43):
what it is the blue hole, theblue hole, yeah, no, fuck off I
couldn't swim over that.
Keep that shit away, all it is.
All it is is just a deepsection in the middle of the
ocean and there's cavesSurrounded by islands, and it's
so wild because it looks likeit's a sandbar all the way
around it.
It's not, it's all underwater,everything around it is all

(27:06):
underwater.
And then there's just thisalmost perfect hole in the
center and then there's justthis almost perfect hole in the
center.

Speaker 3 (27:12):
Yeah, I couldn't.
That is so fascinating.
I don't know what it is becauseI don't think I'm really that
scared of the ocean Like.
I'm a big animal guy and I havea very good understanding that
sharks don't hunt humans.
They are kind of interested inus.

Speaker 2 (27:31):
but They'll take like an interest bite Like they're
they are kind of interested inus, but they'll take like an
interest bite like they'recurious yeah, they take a nibble
to see like what you are.
You know some of them, but someof them will bite your fucking
leg off, but that's just theydon't?

Speaker 3 (27:42):
they don't like our taste, they don't like, uh like,
they're not really thatinterested in us.
Normally, when they attacksurfers they mistake.
Mistake them for seals, that'snormally what happens?

Speaker 2 (27:53):
Or turtles, because if you're on a surfboard, it
kind of looks like a turtle.

Speaker 3 (27:58):
You could look like a turtle 99.9% of the time.
When the very, very rare sharkattack happens, it's because
they mistake you for prey.
They're not coming after you.
They try to avoid humans forthe most part.

Speaker 2 (28:15):
So, like the shark had to be on something, my vote
is Fent.

Speaker 3 (28:19):
Wait, you know how they did Cocaine Bear, fent
Shark.
We just find a shark and it'sleaning.

Speaker 2 (28:29):
It's just underwater, not doing shit leaning, it's
just underwater, not doing shit,the whole movie is just them
going.
Yo look at it, it's leaning, yobro so fucked up.

Speaker 1 (28:42):
Yo give it another hit so there's a couple of
things about sharks that are areannoying when they do these
movies.
Great whites are just the mostwell-known shark, so they always
use great whites tiger sharks.

Speaker 3 (28:56):
Tiger sharks are man killers.

Speaker 1 (28:58):
Yeah, tiger sharks do hunt people, they don't care,
they hunt everything, are justscarier because they're fucking
huge they're huge that, that'swhat it is they're great whites
the majority of great whitedeaths come from the fact that
they bite and realize, oh shit,not what I wanted and let go.

Speaker 3 (29:14):
They don't like.
I heard it's the iron in ourblood.
They don't like that.

Speaker 1 (29:18):
I don't know if it's iron, specifically, but I heard
heavy metals.
Yeah, they don't like the tasteof our blood.

Speaker 2 (29:22):
They're like A tuna's full of mercury.
They'll still eat a tuna,though.

Speaker 1 (29:27):
Sure, but they don't have as many metals as we do.

Speaker 3 (29:31):
Yeah, I've heard that a ton Also.

Speaker 1 (29:32):
I've seen a video.

Speaker 2 (29:34):
The ocean is so deep that at a certain point it
filters out all of the red light.
So if you spearfish, let's saya tuna, its blood will be green.
Wow, I've seen a video of atuna spewing out green blood.

Speaker 3 (29:49):
But then it got to the surface and it was red
Because Alex still can't seethat.

Speaker 2 (29:55):
I can't see it, bro.
He's in the ocean.
He doesn't know if he'sbleeding or not.

Speaker 1 (29:58):
Nope, whoa, that's green.
That's so cool yeah yeah, it'sso cool, I can't even see it
different type of alien so theum the shark, uh, being that,
it's, it's going for a feedingground right when it, when it
bit her and let her go.

Speaker 3 (30:17):
The ironic thing is that she swam to the whale right
yeah, so I I was thinking thatthat must have just been like uh
, well, it's like the firstthing she fucking seen the
island, little island wasn'tthere because the surf hadn't
gone back you would think thatshe would just swim away.
Oh, you know what?

Speaker 1 (30:33):
thank you, yeah that just clarified it for me,
because I was pissed off becauseit seemed to me that we went a
full 24 hour period up to a 36hour period without the tide
going out.
So I was like how the fuck didthat happen?
But no, you, you caught it.

Speaker 2 (30:47):
One of the rock wasn't visible.
That uh the that the tide onlygoes out in once a day, or
whatever.

Speaker 1 (30:53):
Which is fairly normal.

Speaker 2 (30:55):
Yeah, but no, the island wasn't revealed yet, and
then she wasn't even on thatwhale for that long, though
right.

Speaker 1 (31:02):
No, she wasn't.
No very short amount of time.

Speaker 2 (31:03):
They didn't show us.
Well, no, a very short amountof time she got on, and then
almost immediately it startedmoving and she was like what the
fuck she was on the whale for?
Dude it was moving.

Speaker 3 (31:16):
A whale like what, what it fucking bodied.
A whale like a linebacker,which also, which also bothered
me because that wouldn't happenthat was the other thing.

Speaker 1 (31:24):
That was like why is this thing both protecting the
whale and fighting her right?
Because it makes it out likeit's exclusively hunting her.
Which sharks?

Speaker 3 (31:35):
don't do.
Well, this one was, and Ifigured out this movie.
I figured out what happenedBefore this episode started.
I was recording, but I don'tthink TJ was, so we only have
our audio.
We were talking about how theUS has lost some massive
boom-booms in the past, some ofwhich have fallen into the ocean

(31:57):
.
So I figured out what happenedthis shark ate one of those very
large boom-booms no, that's theMeg.
No, no, this one did.
And it sucked in, it justabsorbed all the radiation and
became a super shark.
So then, when it bit her, whenit bit Nancy, that was why she
was able to survive and why shewas able to fight a great white

(32:21):
with her bare hands and 1v1, itwas because she became shark
woman.

Speaker 2 (32:26):
No guys.
Oppenheimer 2.
Oppenheimer 2 in the deep blue.

Speaker 1 (32:32):
Dude.

Speaker 2 (32:33):
They're doing testing on freaking Bikini Atoll and a
freaking shark.

Speaker 1 (32:37):
You guys.

Speaker 2 (32:38):
Yup, nuke sharks.

Speaker 3 (32:41):
Okay, all right, so we're giving him flashbacks to
Zombies at the Beginning.

Speaker 2 (32:46):
Guys, we need to watch Sharknado.

Speaker 1 (32:48):
With that the other thing that you could probably
know.
Now this can be kind ofhumorous when that shark
attacked the, the dude who wastrying to steal her phone and
her money and all that, and she,he was greedy, so he went out
to go steal her board as wellwhich is like what the fuck?
So that one, the shark,actually ate part of him?

(33:08):
Right, like it, it.
It didn't just sever like therewas a lot of him missing well,
no, no, no, his legs.

Speaker 2 (33:16):
His legs were were like being no, there was just
his pants.

Speaker 3 (33:20):
No, it was his legs.
You could see you could see nolegs?

Speaker 1 (33:23):
oh no, they were there because you could see this
half that is the time, as soonas it attacking that she should
have made a swim for it.

Speaker 3 (33:32):
Because as soon as it's busy.
But she would have had to swimright into it.

Speaker 1 (33:36):
No, they were off to the side.
She could have swam straight.

Speaker 2 (33:40):
She was doing the math in her head of how fast she
could swim versus how fast theshark could swim and she was
like what she said, 40 meters orsomething, 40 yards Right, but
again.
That was for the buoy, and theland is a lot further, that's
exclusively when the shark wasjust doing rounds.

Speaker 3 (34:00):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (34:00):
When the shark is eating somebody.
The shark was busy Go.

Speaker 3 (34:04):
Yeah, I think that could have been her time.
But keep in mind, realisticallyshe is just a girl who was
surfing and got stranded and nowjust watched this guy get
mauled, so her reactions arejust going.

Speaker 2 (34:16):
oh oh, oh we're so far in this episode.
And we haven't even mentionedthe best character other than
Blake Lively, steven StevenSeagal.

Speaker 3 (34:28):
Oh my gosh, I have such a funny fact about this.
I love Stevenven.
No, his name is not steven.
Actually, give sully siegel thecredit that he deserves.
He's an actor.
Okay, he's a little bit of anunderrated actor, uh, but I was
watching this on amazon and, uh,I accidentally tapped the
screen when it was just thesiegel and under actors sully
siegel, that is a real actor.

(34:50):
That the fucking bird, theseagull, has more of an acting
career than a lot of la youready?

Speaker 1 (34:56):
better act 2016 the worst actor 2016 marked the year
that sully siegel'sextraordinary career started.
He landed a substantialsupporting role in the shallows,
co-starring with blake lively,in what was to become one of the
most successful summer moviesof the year.
Sully received rave reviews forhis multi-layered portrayal of

(35:17):
a handicapped gull bravelytrying to escape a shark a scary
shark's appetite.
Vulturecom called him thebreakout movie star of the
summer and renowned film criticwin Winston Cook Wilson praised
his bold and it cuts off.

Speaker 3 (35:32):
Sully Siegel co-starred with Blake Lively.
He has more of an acting careerthan so much of LA.
It's crazy.

Speaker 1 (35:42):
Stephen Seagal or Stephen Siegel in the movie
Funny.

Speaker 2 (35:46):
I thought that was great, what's funny is, as I was
watching it, I was like that'sa cute bird, I'll name him
Steven.
And then, if it, says Steven,I'm like yo, so I don't know if
that was a surprise memory fromwhen I watched it last or if I
just really wanted to name thisbird.

Speaker 1 (36:01):
Steven, okay, so part of what I was going to say at
the beginning of this is whenyou're going into a surf spot,
you know that the ocean has theability to just take you out,
yeah, drag you out into itsdepths and unalive you there.
There's nothing you can doabout it.
You cannot fight the ocean.
Now, the dumbest thing you canpossibly do is what she did go

(36:24):
to an uncharted, unknown beachand not tell anybody that you're
there yeah, can I who is afreaking dick, can I?

Speaker 3 (36:33):
just say she had no way of getting off of that beach
.

Speaker 2 (36:36):
She didn't said uber.
He's like who's uber?

Speaker 3 (36:39):
but he literally told her on the way there there's no
cell signal.
She got when or she was gettingtext at the beach, so I guess
she did have cell signal but hewas saying but he was saying,
like you like it.
Maybe he was just saying likeit's super spotty.
Maybe I missed that.

Speaker 1 (36:55):
That's kind of what I thought Okay but, but you don't
, you don't tell somebody youdon't you don't not tell someone
where you're at.
And hey, come check on me Ifyou don't see me in two freaking
days.

Speaker 3 (37:09):
honestly, just take somebody.
I mean she had a shitty friend,but I mean it's all right.

Speaker 1 (37:13):
It's all right if you want to go by yourself, like
her whole thing was.
I needed alone time.
There's nothing wrong with that.

Speaker 3 (37:19):
No, she wanted to go with her friend.
Her friend bailed on her.

Speaker 1 (37:26):
But you tell people like this is where I'm going to
be.
If I don't show back up, comeand find me.
Yeah, I mean, I guess.

Speaker 2 (37:33):
Like she was on the phone with her mom or her sister
and father.
At least tell one of them likehey, I'll call you in two hours.

Speaker 1 (37:41):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (37:42):
If I don't call my friend or call somebody and yeah
, I mean, here's the thing.

Speaker 1 (37:47):
You bring up the point that the friend was just a
real dick because, like, howcould she be gone for days?

Speaker 3 (37:52):
No, here's the thing.
She wasn't gone for days.
She was gone for a day, she wasgone for one night.
But here's the thing she's on asecret beach that she doesn't
even know the name of.
Her friend doesn't know wherethat beach is.
So even if her friend is likeyo, where is she?
She's missing.
What is she gonna do about that?

(38:13):
There's nothing she can doabout it.
There's nothing her family caneven do about it.
They knew she was in mexico,but that's all they knew.
Yep, they knew she was on thesecret beach that their mom used
to go to well, which is mypoint, wherever the fuck.

Speaker 1 (38:21):
That is my my point is don't ever go anywhere.

Speaker 2 (38:24):
Because they were like oh yeah, there's sharp
pointy rocks over there.
There's fire coral over there.
She sees a whole.

Speaker 3 (38:30):
Yeah, but that's.
But that's not uncommon forsurf spots for to to know like,
oh, these are the dangerousspots, don't go near here.

Speaker 2 (38:37):
But everyone else is cool.
Just she's talking to tworandom dudes.
No, okay that, that too thatwas no.

Speaker 3 (38:45):
That was less bad to me than taking a ride with some
random fucking guy in mexico.

Speaker 2 (38:51):
That is never do that .
He's a good guy, though, butstill you don't know people.

Speaker 3 (38:54):
He ended up being a good guy.
But don't do that.
Don't just go to Mexico and geta ride with a random guy to
some secluded beach in themiddle of nowhere.
When you're a pretty woman,that is not a good idea.

Speaker 1 (39:08):
I mean, let me be frank, don't do that if you're a
man.
Yeah, actually just don't dothat, that's just dumb, you get
into a car with a stranger.

Speaker 3 (39:18):
That's what was so funny about those old who says
I'll take you to the secretbeach you want to go to.

Speaker 1 (39:22):
That was great about those old memes.
That was like in the 80s don'ttalk to strangers In the 90s,
don't get into a stranger's carIn in the 90s.
Don't get into a stranger's carin the 2000s calling uber on
the internet.

Speaker 3 (39:32):
or don't talk to people on the internet, right,
don't talk to strangers on theinternet and don't get into
strange people's cars and thengetting calling people on the
internet to get into their caryeah, I'm calling a stranger, or
I'm finding a stranger on theinternet, telling him where I am
so that I can get in his carand he'll drive me to wherever
I'm going.

Speaker 1 (39:50):
So somebody, at least , in that case somebody knows
where you are.

Speaker 3 (39:54):
That's not really any different than a taxi, though.

Speaker 2 (39:57):
Yeah, no, but tax I don't know.

Speaker 3 (40:00):
You could have a fake taxi.

Speaker 2 (40:02):
I hate jellyfish.

Speaker 1 (40:03):
Wait a minute.
Oh yeah, Okay, let's talk aboutthat first.

Speaker 2 (40:06):
I fucking hate jellyfish.
I don't like the way they look.
They're freaky.
Okay, bitch, no, no, I'mtelling you, as soon as I would
like, I would abandon all plans.
I would just let the shark eatme, because as soon as I seen
them jellyfish pop up.

Speaker 3 (40:19):
I don't want to get in that water.

Speaker 2 (40:19):
Not because this thing me, oh that hurt.
No, I just don't like the waythey look and they're just,
they're freaky, and she was allnext to them and I don't like it
I don't mind them.

Speaker 3 (40:28):
I like jelly.
I don't want to be stung by oneand I don't think you could do
what she did.
I think jellyfish tend tocluster way too close together
to swim in between them as afull-sized human being.

Speaker 1 (40:42):
Well, those were rather large.

Speaker 2 (40:45):
She's going to try the free Nemo or finding Nemo
strat, where they just bounce onthe top.
But she's a little too big.

Speaker 1 (40:55):
I've seen them.
I've seen the jellyfish Down inGalveston.
They're much smaller and theyare so tightly packed in
together you can't even get inthe water Without getting hit by
one.
The bigger ones tend to giveeach other a little more space.
Now, I'm not saying that I likethat.
She got hit by one.

Speaker 3 (41:11):
I think it would have been a little more than one
yeah, I don't think you couldjust swim through a whole school
of jellyfish all her injuriesshe just kind of shrugged off
other than her like a leg onenow I will say I chalk a lot of
that up to an insane amount ofadrenaline, like I, especially
that that last fight where she'sfighting and she's just

(41:31):
bleeding and she pulls the, thetourniquet off and everything
and it's like she has no pain.
I think that's all just pureadrenaline keeping her alive in
the in that moment.
But I think overall blakelively did a good job of of
feeling the injuries uh,throughout the movie they didn't
last, though she.

Speaker 1 (41:51):
She felt them when they were there, and then she
was like over them like thepretty quickly, and then the
fucking jellyfish and all ofthat stuff would have left some
lasting marks.
Like it.
You wouldn't just be sitting onthe on the rock, I mean, it
would have been.
It's supposed to be a greattestament to survival, which is
it's good.
I'm all for that.

(42:13):
But when you get hit by all ofthose things and then you're
sitting out of the water, one ofthe things you're going to feel
is the stark difference of theburning of your skin and the
freezing of the air.
Yeah, yeah.
And you're going to be souncomfortable.
And then your bite, and thenyour jellyfish sting
uncomfortable.

Speaker 2 (42:33):
And then your bite, and then your jellyfish sting,
and then I got.
So I'm not gonna.
Your heartbeat which makes yourblood pump, which makes you
bleed out faster.

Speaker 3 (42:38):
Yeah, true, yeah well , I she did, she did like staple
herself did you fucking see herwhen she got to shore that she
looked?

Speaker 2 (42:45):
bad?
Yeah, no, but like she justused her earrings, she had
bracelets on.

Speaker 3 (42:51):
I think that's too big.
No, no, the earrings were like.

Speaker 2 (42:54):
They were made out of multiple strings like braided
together.

Speaker 3 (42:57):
I would have tried.
At least the earrings were likeperfect sutures.

Speaker 1 (43:01):
Yeah, it was more like staples.

Speaker 3 (43:03):
Yeah, it was like that.

Speaker 1 (43:04):
I don't think she could have tied the cord.

Speaker 3 (43:07):
I think that cord would have ripped her skin yeah,
she also had no, like she hadno painkillers or anything.

Speaker 2 (43:13):
She was literally going in your wound.

Speaker 1 (43:16):
Multiple yeah, exactly the salt water yeah,
that's got to be on the brightside after the first like 20
minutes of it, you would stopfeeling it yeah I've I've had
some pretty gnarly injuries inthe water and you know it, it
does, it hurts you have.

Speaker 2 (43:34):
You have good gushing wounds and it hurts, it, stings
it, antibacterial, anti, youknow yes and no.

Speaker 1 (43:43):
When it's ocean water , no, it's.
It's so bad, there's so muchbacteria in there yeah, there's.
There's so much to mention thewhale yeah, yeah, not to mention
right the blood and that.
Yeah, it would have beensomething else not great for
wounds no that whole area wouldhave been terrible, I'm sure she
had blood transfusions when shegot to the hospital, but I mean

(44:06):
, you know, she did look pretty,pretty gnarly at the end there.
She looked beat up, so all ofthe fun of the movie.
So I thought you know thesurfing was okay.
It was very short.
I did love the.
What do you call it?
Can I call it acrobatics thatshe was doing?
It wasn't really acrobatics.

(44:27):
It's all in water On the buoyor like um, when she was, when
she got up on the buoy, theshark comes and and takes the,
uh, knocks her.
She grabs that.
That handle oh, it comes off inher hand oh, and then she had
the wherewithal to stab thefucking shark with it and like
held on for a while the look onher face when she grabs that

(44:50):
ladder and it breaks.

Speaker 3 (44:51):
The face is just, the face is purely just.
Bruh, like no fucking way Imean very accurate.

Speaker 1 (45:02):
I would have said, uh , my thought was, honestly, that
was the wtf face, yeah that'spurely just.

Speaker 3 (45:09):
It happened and the face was just what the fuck?
Of course this would happen.
That was the face she had itwas perfect.

Speaker 1 (45:17):
And then she just comes down on it and stabs it
instantly, perfect.
You know, it would have beenbetter if she would have got in
the eye Cause, if she would havedone some major damage with it
she had no choice.
She had no choice, she had nochoice I get it.
But yeah, if she could havedone some major damage with it,
definitely she could have gottenit to run away or swim away.

Speaker 3 (45:36):
I don't know.
She lit the thing on fire andthat didn't make it run away.

Speaker 1 (45:40):
I guess that's true.

Speaker 3 (45:41):
It just angered it.

Speaker 1 (45:43):
I will say but honestly I don't think the fire
injured it enough.

Speaker 3 (45:48):
No, I mean it definitely would have caused
insane confusion and discomfort.
Imagine you're a shark.
You're swimming towards preyand then, all of a sudden,
you're on fire in the water,Something that has never
happened to you before.
You've never seen fire.

Speaker 1 (46:05):
You've never been on fire.
What the fuck do do they feel?
Fire this?
Do they feel the same way we do?

Speaker 3 (46:13):
it's not the feel, it's the confusion.
We're talking about a shark.
It's a pretty primitive animal.
If you, if a shark is randomlylit on fire, they don't even
know what fire is, and now their, their whole body is covered in
flames.
That's enough to confuse theshit out of a shark.
I don't think it's gonna belike you did that to me and go

(46:36):
after.
I think it's gonna be like I'ma fucking out of here dude.

Speaker 1 (46:39):
I don't know what it was already like, zoned in on
her for some reason well,because she was on its feeding
ground.

Speaker 3 (46:44):
But I think at that point her shark goes the same
worth it.
But I mean she on its feedingground.

Speaker 1 (46:47):
But I think at that point a shark goes the same way.
But I mean she left the feedingground, so why was?
Why was this shark so fuckinghell bent on getting her?

Speaker 3 (46:54):
OK.
So that was something I wantedto ask you is if you were to get
far enough away from a shark,from a shark's feeding ground.
Let's say you're in hersituation, you stumble upon the
feeding ground, the shark isangry with you, but you do
manage to get away enough.
Does the shark eventually justleave you alone and go like,
okay, you're out of my territory, theoretically?

Speaker 1 (47:16):
speaking, as soon as the shark bit her in the leg, at
the very beginning I was like,oh shit, you're not a seal,
you're not trying to eat my food, you're not, you're not a uh,
another predator.
It would have bit her and belike, oh, I know what that is,
nope I'm done, I'm out of here.

Speaker 2 (47:32):
Like, are they like, if they have kids, don't they
just like kind of leave theirkids?
They're not like any other typeof animal where they like, stay
with them.

Speaker 1 (47:40):
No, they, they don't get like.
They're similar to similar totigers, where they raise them up
to a certain point and thenchase them off.

Speaker 3 (47:49):
There's a lot.
Well, I think don't lions dothat too.

Speaker 1 (47:51):
So I was wondering maybe no, eventually, no,
eventually, uh, male lions willthe females raise the cubs and
then, if any of those lionschallenge the alpha, he'll run
them off.
Yeah, that's what it is but ifthe others fall in line.
They can stay as long asthey're in line with him I, yeah
, I'm well.

Speaker 3 (48:10):
There's a lot of species, though, that that do
that.

Speaker 1 (48:13):
That will just kick out their chase, they chase
their young away.
Get away from me.
They don't.
They don't hunt, they're notfriendly creatures like spiders.
Spiders, for instance, they whydo we always got to talk about?

Speaker 3 (48:26):
spiders, spiders don't raise their young.
They hatch and then theyfucking either survive or don't.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (48:32):
And that's just how it is.
That's very insensitive to myson.

Speaker 3 (48:36):
I will say your son's kind of cute.

Speaker 1 (48:37):
DJ put a spider on his head.

Speaker 2 (48:40):
It's a plushie, it's a very cute plushie he got from
my wife I'll show you.
She sees in the chat and so ismy brother and they both went we
and my fucking sisters in thechat.
Okay, hi, anita, maddie andtyreece.
More wheeze.
Social security, number fivewhere's that down?

Speaker 3 (49:00):
where's that down?

Speaker 2 (49:01):
he said, they tend to leave them, the sharks they
have a?

Speaker 1 (49:05):
uh, they have a term for it.
It is, I'm looking for it.
It's a hard word to say, ummeanwhile don't some boobies
have phones?

Speaker 3 (49:12):
I kind of thought that I thought she was going to
call the the boat for a second.

Speaker 1 (49:17):
The ship it is vivi paris, vivi parus, meaning they
give birth to live young thathave already developed inside
their bodies.
They provide their young withmilk, so very much like tigers.
I guess the difference istigers will chase their young
off.

Speaker 3 (49:37):
Yeah, Versus just being like I ate you on your own
.

Speaker 2 (49:40):
But yeah, no, here was another idea.
Maybe the shark is drunk fromthe decaying whale producing
alcohol.

Speaker 3 (49:51):
It's kind of just like a stepdad.
It just becomes an abusiveshark.
That's what happened.

Speaker 2 (49:59):
I told you to wash the fucking dishes.
Wash the dishes.

Speaker 1 (50:05):
I told you to prepare that whale for me.
Okay, jeff the shark, why isn'tthe coral sweeped?
The coral sweeped, do you meanswept?

Speaker 2 (50:15):
It's not swept Okay so.

Speaker 3 (50:18):
I'm the German over here.

Speaker 1 (50:19):
All of the silliness notwithstanding, we all agree
that some of the parts werepretty entertaining.
Where she was fighting theshark, she was getting away from
the shark, going from thesurfboard to the rock, timing
the shark getting from the rockover to the unalive surfer's
helmet.

Speaker 3 (50:39):
I have a problem with the timing, why she times the
shark at 32 seconds going to thewhale and back right.
What she's timing is, it's justleisure stroll, it's leisure
stroll.
Oh shit, she's in the water.
That's way faster than 32seconds the second it notices

(51:05):
that she's in the water.
Judging off of the way thisshark acted, it would beeline
straight for her way faster thanits leisure stroll that it was
doing.

Speaker 2 (51:15):
Right, 35 miles per hour in short bursts.
She's done 50 kilometers perhour for people.

Speaker 3 (51:22):
She's done.
There's no way you're getting32 seconds.

Speaker 2 (51:25):
But yeah, no, 35 miles per hour, that's a car 50
kilometers per hour, 35kilometers, 35?
35 miles, 50 kilometers.

Speaker 1 (51:34):
Jesus Christ 50 kilometers.

Speaker 2 (51:36):
It's all going to be edited.

Speaker 1 (51:38):
Well, no, I was making fun, because what kind of
Canadian are you to usekilometers with us?
The 51st state is what he isFor the people who aren't using
freedom units.

Speaker 2 (51:49):
Oh okay, the 51st state is what he is people who
aren't using freedom units.
Um, oh, okay, I appreciate.
So like imagine a car coming atyou at 35 miles per hour
because, like it literallyweighs as much as a car it does,
god I mean, even if it doesn'tbite you, if it just rams you
yeah, no, that'll fucking hurtit has a freaking hard nose.
That would really hurt uh,Short fin Mako sharks can go 60
miles per hour.

Speaker 1 (52:09):
That's crazy yeah buddy, did you know Deep Blue
Sea?
You know that movie?
Those were all Mako sharks.

Speaker 3 (52:17):
Okay, on the topic of surviving, this I don't think I
survive and it's honestly noteven for the shark.
This I don't think I surviveand it's honestly not even for
the shark.
If I was stranded on that rockin the middle of uh the ocean at
night, I I would just die tothe shark.
I hate cold so much that thatcold would be so intense along

(52:42):
with that injury on your leg,I'd give up.
I don't think I could.

Speaker 2 (52:45):
Actually, I don't think I could yeah, no, I think
I would survive because I have aloud enough voice when I'm
yelling to freaking.
Get the attention of the dudeson the beach before they're even
in their car.
She was like help me and theycould couldn't.

Speaker 3 (53:00):
No, they'll hear me, because I'll although, although
you got to admit like they werejust dumb no, don't worry,
there's no sharks in thesewaters yeah and they literally a
shark because they said thatthey clearly heard her, which
means they straight up were justlike no, you're crazy, why
would she have been there?

Speaker 1 (53:19):
yeah, it's okay.
Why are you hanging out on therock since we saw you yesterday?

Speaker 3 (53:25):
yeah, and it doesn't look like you've moved at all
that like that doesn't?
That doesn't scream anything toyou.
She's on a rock without hersurfboard.
That doesn't scream.

Speaker 1 (53:33):
She's yelling about a shark that doesn't scream
anything to you by the way, thatalso pissed me off, that it
seemed like they were takinglike really hard shots at
surfers, being that freakingdumb and they're not, and also
they're very observant of theirsurroundings well, okay, well my
problem with the gopro.

Speaker 3 (53:53):
Oh yeah, it lasted so long I honestly I I don't even
care about that.
What I care about is that whenthe shark bites the guy, the
gopro like cuts off, like it gotdestroyed.
Yeah, but it didn't.

Speaker 2 (54:04):
But it's right there, right after made for like shock
, like you're, you're going downhills with it and freaking
dropping it.
That was space and shit likethat was purely.

Speaker 3 (54:15):
That was purely for budgetary reasons, but like that
would have been the coolestfootage.
Honestly see a shark attacklike that that'd be.

Speaker 1 (54:23):
It did pretty well.
I mean, it gave us some, somepretty decent shots of of
running up.

Speaker 3 (54:29):
I just mean, like a GoPro wouldn't do that.

Speaker 2 (54:31):
She was pretty.
I will say she's pretty like,inventive and like.

Speaker 3 (54:36):
Resilient.

Speaker 2 (54:38):
Yeah, resilient and good thinking, like on her feet,
like you know.

Speaker 1 (54:43):
What are the she?

Speaker 2 (54:43):
was like she was in med school.

Speaker 3 (54:46):
Resourceful.

Speaker 1 (54:47):
Resourceful.
She was very self.

Speaker 2 (54:48):
Uh, very resourceful with, like you know, the timing
of the shark and how fast it isand blah, blah, blah, even
though you know 35 miles perhour anyways, but um yeah the
fucking when she was like shegot on the buoy, she immediately
went into like fuck this, sharkmode and stabbed it with the
ladder, freaking, found theflares.
First flare fail and then sheshot another one.

(55:12):
I'm like, why are you shootinganother one?
I thought they were all gonnabe duds, but well honestly, I'm
surprised she didn't shoot moreinto the air.

Speaker 3 (55:20):
If I just shot one into the air, I wouldn't be like
, ah, they didn't see me.
I'd shoot a few more, just onthe off chance that one of them
happens to be looking in thatdirection.

Speaker 1 (55:30):
And I would have done it over longer periods of time,
but I would have done the samething.

Speaker 2 (55:35):
That whale oil catching on fire and lighting
the shark on fire was dope.

Speaker 3 (55:41):
I know theoretically something like that could happen
.
What are the odds that canhappen, that a flare gun lights
whale oil?

Speaker 1 (55:49):
on fire they do burn hot, but I don't, they don't.

Speaker 3 (55:52):
I mean, I don't know what those types of flares were,
for they're not underwaterflares, so the fact that it was
burning underwater was a littleweird well, yeah, they, they've
got to be waterproof or waterresistant at least, because they
when they fell in the in thewater and she still used them.
But two, I assume that ifthey're on a buoy they would be
waterproof or water-resistant.

Speaker 2 (56:13):
Yeah, so they are full of strontium nitrate,
potassium nitrate or potassiumperchlorate, mixed with a fuel
such as charcoal, sulfur,sawdust, aluminum, magnesium,
which, if it's magnesium, youcan't put magnesium out.
You can't put it out, orsuitable polymeric resin.

(56:37):
So I think it couldtheoretically if there's
magnesium in it it could likethat.

Speaker 3 (56:42):
That'd be interesting .

Speaker 2 (56:44):
But she also thought good on her feet, grabbing onto
that chain, wrapping herself toit, because she knew that it was
going to start sinking insanemove fucking awesome move, but
uh what was pulling that chain?
It's just the weight, it's.
It's.
There has to be heavyweightchains to hold that buoy there,
dude I guess so, but at thatspeed well, so it started off

(57:07):
slow and then started goingfaster and faster and faster,
which?

Speaker 3 (57:10):
did make sense, I guess, as it collapses more.

Speaker 1 (57:12):
But it was an anchor that was.
This was the part that botheredme.
It was an anchor that was aboveground.
It wasn't anchored to anything,and that is not how those work.
They usually are sitting on theground with chain slack, so
when the storms rise or anything, like that the buoys rise and

(57:33):
fall without the anchor comingoff the ground, so it was a
little strange.

Speaker 3 (57:39):
Well, she was in high tide.

Speaker 2 (57:41):
Freaking concrete rebar.

Speaker 3 (57:44):
Yeah, what was?

Speaker 2 (57:45):
that?
That I don't know what the hell, that was.
That was so bizarre maybe itwas the perfect fell off or
something it was just a perfectshark killer is what it was.

Speaker 3 (57:55):
It was the perfect shark killer was dude uh, also I
didn't know she did fuckingsynchronized swimming, dodging
out of the way in the water ohyeah, from a shark I mean going,
come on Going 35 miles an hourshe dodged a shark in water.

Speaker 2 (58:10):
With one messed up leg.

Speaker 3 (58:13):
That's why I'm saying she is a superhero.
She got shark powers by thatshark bite Radioactive shark.
It's the only thing that makessense, and I think you're
disappointed because you know itWell, I think that they do a
sequel.

Speaker 2 (58:27):
It's the only thing that makes sense, and I think
you're disappointed because youknow it well.
I think that I do a sequel, uh,where the sister really wants
to visit the beach that her momwent to, and then it's a zombie
shark it's so funny when hersister's like do you think
you'll I'll ever be as good asyou?

Speaker 3 (58:39):
and she's like no, and I'm like yeah you're never
going, you're never, going toone v one a shark, bro, you're
not as dope as no dude.

Speaker 2 (58:49):
I wish that she had the GoPro on.
I would have just kept theGoPro on.
I've been like somebody willfind it eventually.
I'll strap this to my head sowhen I do die.

Speaker 1 (58:58):
I like it.
Nobody's going to believe herthat she went 1v1 with a shark.

Speaker 2 (59:03):
They're just going to be like oh, yeah, I bit her.

Speaker 1 (59:09):
Oh yeah, she got stranded.
And now, with all of that, saiduh.

Speaker 2 (59:11):
Final thoughts on this movie.
I liked it.
Uh, it is a good intro into theuh white bitches stuck in place
uh genre uh yeah, we gotta dolike 12 feet deep the one where
they're in a pool.
We gotta do fall where they'reup on a tower, 12 feet deep deep
.

Speaker 1 (59:27):
Okay, I'm not going to lie, I've watched fall and
that one.
Just it's so hard to watch.

Speaker 3 (59:33):
What about 47 meters?

Speaker 2 (59:34):
down.
I like that one too 47 metersdown yeah.

Speaker 3 (59:38):
Isn't there one that's called like 47 meters
deeper, or something like that?

Speaker 1 (59:41):
No, 47 meters down uncaged.
Oh, I mean, I don't know forsure that there's not one called
that, but I know there's 47meters unchained or uncaged,
sorry, uncaged To Django,unchained oh shit that got dark.
It's just a racist shark.
Get it, get it.

Speaker 3 (01:00:02):
It's a racist, great white.

Speaker 1 (01:00:05):
I said that got dark.
Oh crazy, Crazy.

Speaker 3 (01:00:09):
I thought my joke was way better.

Speaker 1 (01:00:10):
The racist great white wait.
Did you give your finalthoughts?

Speaker 3 (01:00:14):
uh, great movie.
Um, I think she's a superheroand I think the shark is
radioactive.

Speaker 2 (01:00:20):
And that's my final conclusions, okay oh, she also
got a shark tooth at one point,which was she did yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:00:27):
She used it to open the buoy.

Speaker 1 (01:00:28):
But to be fair, anybody who fights a great white
shark with their bare handswalks away with a shark tooth.
Everybody knows that.

Speaker 3 (01:00:35):
Bro, she should get the shark head.
She should have them retrievethe shark.
They should retrieve the sharkout of respect for her, because
she 1v1'd a shark.

Speaker 2 (01:00:45):
Josh said signal flares burn at 1600 degrees
celsius.
And he also said I'm sorry, butfall was stupid well, you heard
it here, folks whether it wasstupid or not was not the point
is fall.
No, it's not.

Speaker 3 (01:01:00):
We don't know what it is yet until we.
Well, mr host, what are yourfinal thoughts?

Speaker 1 (01:01:05):
my final thoughts were uh, as a former surfer, I
was absolutely fucking pissedoff at her for not doing any of
the basics.
But she did.

Speaker 2 (01:01:13):
You always look around.

Speaker 1 (01:01:14):
She did you always check your surroundings.
No, no, no, not just once.
You don't just stand there andlook out there and go in the
water and not pay attention toanything around you ever again.
Nah, nothing changes.
Oh, right, because nothingchanged.
For her, that was good advice.
I'm pretty sure she got thatadvice from you.
Okay, and with that.

Speaker 2 (01:01:39):
Thundercat.

Speaker 3 (01:01:40):
Yeah, I gathered that eventually 15 times hosts.

Speaker 2 (01:01:43):
I've been counting, I've been watching the whole
episode.

Speaker 3 (01:01:45):
Did.
What Did he do it?

Speaker 2 (01:01:46):
Did it like 15 times.

Speaker 1 (01:01:48):
What are we talking about?
So that's 15 points.

Speaker 3 (01:01:51):
What are we talking about?

Speaker 2 (01:01:53):
I've been counting.

Speaker 3 (01:01:54):
What did I do?

Speaker 1 (01:01:55):
You did it 15 times.
What is this secret?

Speaker 3 (01:01:56):
game I didn't know about.

Speaker 1 (01:01:57):
God darn it.
If you don't know what you did,I can't help you.

Speaker 3 (01:02:01):
Was it cursing?
Did I curse 15 times?
That's very plausible.
That seems right.
Actually, that seems prettyaccurate.

Speaker 1 (01:02:11):
You cursed far more than 15 times.

Speaker 3 (01:02:15):
I don't think I even did anything, in particular, 15
times.
Josh, you know what he did.
I didn't yawn 15 times.

Speaker 1 (01:02:21):
Josh, you know what he did.
I didn't Give me a heads up.
Do you know what he did?
I know what he did.
Do I like sigh?

Speaker 2 (01:02:28):
I know, you know what did I do?

Speaker 1 (01:02:29):
We talked about it beforehand.

Speaker 2 (01:02:31):
This is what you get for leaving the room, Eric.

Speaker 1 (01:02:34):
I don't even know.
However, with all of that said,even with you doing that 15
times, that's right nerdy vet.
Eric knows what he did.
Eric doesn't know what he did,he's just fucking with us.

Speaker 3 (01:02:44):
Eric has no idea what he did he did.

Speaker 1 (01:02:49):
He's just fucking with us.
Eric has no idea what he did.
But with that said, I want tolet you all know that, uh, you
can catch our podcast.
Every friday at 7 am we releasenew episodes.
We have over 70 episodes up,guys.
Please go check us out anywhereyou get podcasts.
Check out our socials at uhtiktok for now.
Instagram, facebook at Survivethe Podcast.
You can find us on X at Alexand Eric WIS.

(01:03:12):
You can send us your emails togive us your recommendation.
What movie would you like us tocover?
What do you want to be involvedin?
Any email you send us, we willgive you a shout out on the
podcast.
Send it to theboys atwillyousur podcastcom.
That's t-h-e-b-o-y-s at willyou survive the podcastcom.

(01:03:32):
And with all of that said andall of our final thoughts on the
shallows, I do actually have awinner, and the winner is I
won't make you do a drum roll,it is.

Speaker 3 (01:03:46):
Eric Get fucked TJ with your bullshit.

Speaker 2 (01:03:52):
That handshake gave us free to win.
Loser, you didn't win in yourown volition.

Speaker 3 (01:03:56):
I don't need your pity win.
I don't even want to win.
What's the next movie, Eric?
I don't know.
That's why I don't want to win.

Speaker 1 (01:04:05):
Do you know why Do?

Speaker 2 (01:04:06):
you know why.

Speaker 3 (01:04:08):
So now.

Speaker 2 (01:04:08):
I've got to find out a movie.
What was the last thing you did?

Speaker 3 (01:04:12):
Jokes on what was the last thing I did.

Speaker 1 (01:04:16):
That's what I was going to say.
Do you know why you won?

Speaker 3 (01:04:18):
Because I haven't hosted in like six episodes.
Because you hate it All right,guys, next episode is going to
be so fun guys.
Next episode is going to be sofun guys.
You just wait.

Speaker 1 (01:04:29):
You just wait.
We gave you a genre the brain.
If you want to do a movie, wecould do 47 meters down.

Speaker 3 (01:04:38):
My gears are spinning .
My gears are spinning.

Speaker 1 (01:04:43):
My brain is smoking 240 feet in the air.

Speaker 2 (01:04:48):
LAFD thinks that there's a fire happening because
of how much smoke is coming outof my brain.

Speaker 1 (01:04:53):
Sorry the descent.

Speaker 3 (01:04:56):
You are literally just saying the first season.
He was literally just quotingall of this guy.

Speaker 1 (01:05:07):
He's just reading all of the.
He's just reading all of theepisodes we talked about.

Speaker 2 (01:05:12):
Minus one win to Eric , which still stands.
I don't know why this is on thepage.

Speaker 3 (01:05:17):
I'm taking that shit away.
I'm taking that shit away rightaway.
It's a part of the list.
Yeah, I can Watch me.
I'm the host.
Text episode.

Speaker 2 (01:05:25):
So get mortuary assistant.

Speaker 3 (01:05:28):
This guy wrote in his little fucking journal and he
thinks it means something.
Now.

Speaker 2 (01:05:32):
I mean I am the loser for this episode, which means I
do get some sort of power, asin you get the least power.
I'm still editing this oneLoser.

Speaker 3 (01:05:42):
Wow, what a petty bitch.

Speaker 2 (01:05:44):
It's just going to be me and Alex talking the whole
time.
Joke's on you.
I'll cut it to where it's justlike 30 minutes of us just
talking.

Speaker 3 (01:05:56):
Joke's on you.
This file has been an hour and45 minutes, so have fun editing.

Speaker 1 (01:06:01):
It's true, it has been.

Speaker 3 (01:06:04):
This guy's saying he's going to do extra work and
cut me out and shit.
He has an hour 45 to go through.
You do.

Speaker 2 (01:06:11):
He's not gonna be editing shit.
Have you guys listened to thelatest episode?
I did.

Speaker 1 (01:06:18):
The one that came out at 7 o'clock tonight.

Speaker 3 (01:06:21):
No, that was the black.

Speaker 2 (01:06:22):
Was that the black I said You're dwelling in the past
.
It's 12.58am.

Speaker 3 (01:06:26):
It was literally yesterday You're dwelling in the
past.
It's 12 58.
Yeah, it was literallyyesterday.
You're dwelling in the pastthis guy's the guy who orders a
pizza.

Speaker 2 (01:06:33):
This guy this guy's the one who orders a pizza on
december 31st, and it's like oh,I ordered that last year it's
not that far into the episode,um, but you're like, I'm like
I'm to put somethingembarrassing of you, alex, right
now.
And then I just recorded myselfwith my voice changer.
And it was like hi, this isAlex from the will you survive

(01:06:55):
podcast, and I am a homosexual,wow.

Speaker 1 (01:07:04):
I am, I'm gay.
I'm gay for my wife.

Speaker 2 (01:07:07):
So I need to add like a file on my computer where I
can just save things that arefunny.

Speaker 1 (01:07:11):
All right well that wraps up.
That concludes this episode ofWill you Survive, the Podcast.
Thank you for joining us as wecovered the shallows.
We talked about the fires inLos Angeles and the practicality
of survival tips making sureyou're brushed up, don't let
yourself get rusty, stay sharpand, until next time, stay alive

(01:07:31):
.
Thank you.