October 29, 2025 • 28 mins
A $20 coin survived thefts, fires, a king’s collection, and a courtroom drama to fetch $7.6 million—yet it can’t buy a single act of love. We take that glittering legend and hold it up to a rarer treasure: agape that refuses rudeness, self‑seeking, and quick anger. Rather than treating love like a display piece, we walk through 1 Corinthians 13 as a field guide to action—15 verbs that pull love out of the safe and into circulation, where it belongs.
We break the journey into three uncommon moves. First, uncommon courtesy: the quiet power of tact, modesty, and consideration that protects others’ dignity in small, daily choices. Second, uncommon concern: the countercultural habit of not seeking our own advantage, of turning conversations and credit outward so others rise. Third, uncommon control: Spirit‑led restraint that won’t be provoked, illustrated by turning the other cheek and going the second mile—a deliberate surrender of status and convenience to stop resentment from writing the script.
Along the way, we contrast agape with the familiar loves of appetite and affinity, showing why self‑giving love is both rare and practical. You’ll hear memorable stories, ancient context that clarifies Jesus’ teaching, and concrete ways to practice patience, share advantage, and respond to irritation without becoming the second person in a quarrel. If rarity excites us, this is the treasure worth pursuing—because its value grows as it is spent.
If this conversation helped you reframe what matters, follow the show, share it with a friend, and leave a quick review. Your feedback helps more people discover wisdom that can move from vault to everyday life.
Stephen's latest book, The Disciples Prayer, is available now. https://www.wisdomonline.org/store/view/the-disciples-prayer-hardback
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Episode Transcript
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SPEAKER_01 (00:06):
Ladies and gentlemen, some guy is gonna
eventually die with a twentydollar gold coin in his safe.
And what good did it do him?
But to give him somehow theimpression that he had spent his
money well and now ownedsomething valuable because it
(00:28):
was rare.
Listen, the most valuable thingsin your life are indeed rare,
but they are not kept in a safe.
They are lived out in your life.
SPEAKER_00 (00:53):
Often the most valuable things in the world are
the uncommon things.
As believers, we need to cherishwhat is uncommon, but not in the
way that the world does.
Uncommon courtesy, uncommonconcern, uncommon self-control.
Those are all aspects of themost uncommon thing in the whole
(01:16):
world.
Uncommonly true love.
Unlike other valuablepossessions, true love is never
hidden away in a safe orlockbox.
True love is constantly spendingitself on others.
Today, Stephen Davy continueshis series entitled True Love
(01:36):
with this message calleduncommonly rare, undeniably
real.
SPEAKER_01 (01:45):
Since it was minted in 1933, one particular gold
coin has been stolen, shipped toEgypt, destroyed, almost
destroyed by fire twice andhidden for years.
It is the double eagle$20 goldcoin, an ounce of nearly pure
(02:11):
gold.
When it went up for auction justa few years ago, it sold for an
amazing amount of money.
It all started during the daysof the Great Depression.
During the worst years of theDepression, people were hoarding
their gold out of fear, and itwas undermining the nation's
financial system.
(02:31):
As soon as Franklin DelanoRoosevelt became president, by
executive order, he took theUnited States off the gold
standard, and payment foranything by gold was now
prohibited.
Thousands of citizens exchangedtheir now worthless gold at
banks for cash.
(02:52):
Only problem is somebody forgotto tell uh or send a memo to the
U.S.
Mint to stop making these goldcoins.
And they produced hundreds ofthousands of these$20 gold coins
until they got the memo andstopped.
All of the uh coins never leftthe mint.
They were melted down, and thatwas the end of it.
(03:13):
All except for 10 of them.
Ten coins that the U.S.
Mint's chief cashier had stolen.
Eventually, after a number ofyears, the Secret Service were
able to track down all of thembut one.
The tenth and only remainingdouble eagle had landed in the
(03:36):
collection of the king of Egypt,a man who had an interesting
penchant for collections.
He collected old aspirinbottles, used razor blades,
stamps, and coins.
In 1952, this last double eaglewas to be returned to the U.S.
(03:58):
after this Egyptian king died.
It never made it.
It somehow disappeared again.
Fort years later, it showed upin the hands of a dealer in
1966, claimed to be thelegitimate owner.
He ended up going to court andbattling the U.S.
government over ownership ofthis coin.
(04:20):
During the court battle, thecoin was placed in what seemed
to be a secure location, a vaultat the World Trade Center.
If you can imagine it, just daysbefore 9-11, it was moved to
Fort Knox, where the governmentagreed to release the coin and
sell it at auction and split theproceeds with the dealer.
(04:42):
When it went up for auction, ananonymous telephone bidder won
the bid and purchased the$20double legal coin for$7.6
million.
Can you imagine?
$7 million for a$20 coin you'llnever spend.
(05:08):
Why the incredible value?
And frankly, why all theinterest that is spanned now?
Nearly a century.
Well, it's because it's it's oneof a kind.
There's no other coin in theworld like it.
Rare things are treateddifferently than common things,
(05:31):
aren't they?
I believe it was the greattheologian Mark Twain who once
said, if stones were rare anddiamonds commonplace, we would
be wearing rocks for jewelry andthrowing diamonds at stray dogs.
It's true.
(05:52):
Now, if you're like me and youwouldn't spend any more than$20
for a$20 coin.
The truth remains, the moreuncommonly rare something is,
the more valuable it becomes.
In 1 Corinthians 13, we havebeen exploring the rare
(06:12):
sightings of genuine, authentic,uncommon love.
We've contrasted it thus farwith the loves of the world, the
passion, epithet, the eros, thestorge, the philia of the world.
And we've discovered the rarebeauty of agape.
We have noted thus far theabsolute necessity of this kind
(06:34):
of love.
In fact, if we have amazingcharacter qualities and ministry
dynamic, if we do not have love,we might as well all just grab a
pair of symbols and make a lotof noise, right?
By the way, I got to tell you,when I preached at Dallas
Seminary, I preached these threemessages, and I don't think it's
(06:54):
ever happened in Chaefer Chapelbefore, but I played the
symbols.
I played my symbol solo.
They will forget me, but theywill never, ever forget the
symbols.
No, actually, we had a great,great time.
Next, we began to explore howlove acts.
And remember, verses four toseven are not adjectives, they
(07:16):
are 15 action verbs.
This is not what love is.
This is what love does.
Now we've arrived at verse five,where I was immediately struck
by the simplicity of love'sactivity.
Let's take a few more wordshere, action verbs tonight.
(07:38):
Paul writes in verse five lovedoes not act unbecomingly.
These phrases are so down toearth.
The description of the way loveacts is so obvious here, isn't
(08:02):
it?
In fact, uh, reminds me of oneof my friends would say this is
not rocket surgery.
That's deep for a Sunday night.
You hang with me.
But listen, what is obvious tous is that this is rare.
These are the actions, theseactions are really like double
(08:25):
eagle coins.
Not only are they rarely seen inpublic, they are becoming more
and more uncommon in the churchtoday.
They're hardly surfacing at all.
These are expressions ofselfless, willful, committed,
true love.
And as we work through thesethree verbs, let me just call
them three uncommon or threerare expressions of love.
(08:48):
The first is uncommon courtesy.
Paul begins this verse bysaying, love does not act
unbecomingly.
You could translate this agapedoes not treat others rudely.
One author translates it, lovedoes not behave indecently.
(09:11):
In the Corinthian church, bycontrast, they were selfishly
overindulging at the lovefeasts.
We talked a little bit aboutthat this morning.
Even to the point ofdrunkenness, 1 Corinthians 11,
20 to 22.
They were suing one another forall sorts of things in chapter
6, verses 1 to 7.
They were hogging the floor andtaking over the assembly with
(09:33):
their own personal agendas, 1Corinthians 14, 26.
In fact, in verse 27, Paul evenhad to ask them to take turns
speaking, and not all at once,as they clamored to be heard.
This was becoming then thisunbecoming nature of love, more
(09:56):
and more rare, this uncommonexpression of courtesy.
This is, ladies and gentlemen,frankly put, this is
tactfulness.
Someone once said that tact ismaking people feel at home when
you really wish they were.
(10:19):
One author wrote that this verbfor rude or unbecoming conveys
the idea of inappropriate dress,immodest dress, inconsiderate
talk, disregard for otherpeople's time, taking advantage
of people, running roughshodover others' plans and
(10:42):
interests, inappropriatebehavior with the opposite sex,
basic discourtesy and rudeness,and a general disregard for
proper social conduct are allevidences of this one verb that
Paul would consider the oppositeof true love.
By the way, this phrase canrefer then to being
(11:05):
inconsiderate of how yourbehavior might affect somebody
else even in little things.
This has to do with the mannersour moms tried to teach us.
This is the courteousness, thesensitivity to other people.
(11:26):
And Paul is speaking in suchobvious language, he says, love
is like that.
It can come down to earth insuch basic ways.
Just being sensitive in littlethings.
(11:46):
Uncommon courtesy is synonymouswith true love.
Paul goes on in this text torefer secondly to what we'll
just call tonight uncommonconcern.
He writes in verse 5 love doesnot act unbecomingly, it does
not seek its own.
In other words, love does notinsist on its own way.
(12:09):
Paul kind of brings out thisrare coin in public view of the
Corinthians.
In fact, he does it time andtime again, and they just
weren't getting it.
He said in chapter 10, I try toplease everyone in everything I
do.
How?
Not seeking my own advantage,but that of many.
It doesn't mean he shelved thetruth.
It simply meant that when he gotaround Paul, he'd tell you the
(12:31):
truth in love, but he alsowanted your best.
He wanted your advantage.
He wanted to promote you.
He wanted to talk about you.
He wanted to help you.
That was the Paul.
He said in chapter 9, for thoughI am free, I have made myself a
slave to all.
A few verses earlier in chapter10, he challenged the
(12:53):
Corinthians with this Let no oneseek his own advantage but that
of another.
Then here in chapter 13, lovedoes not seek its own.
There are two kinds of people inthis regard: those who insist
upon their own privileges, andthose who never quite forget
their own responsibilities.
(13:15):
Those who are always thinking ofwhat life owes them, and those
who never quite get over thefact that they owe life.
Agape is rare because agape isan uncommon concern for others.
It is the selfless pursuit ofanother's blessing.
And the reason it is soremarkable is you rarely see it
(13:40):
in public.
Selfless, self-defacing,self-promoting, self-sacrificing
love.
But listen, seeking your own,which would be to flip this coin
over, that's the law.
(14:11):
This is the opposite ofselfishness.
Love the way Lensky penned thisrather provocative statement in
this particular commentary onthis passage.
He said this if you can cureselfishness, you replant the
Garden of Eden.
True love is always unselfish.
(14:31):
And how easy to say, right?
Man, how hard to live out.
That's why selfishness is ascommon as rocks.
And unselfish living is as rareas a double legal twenty dollar
coin.
(14:51):
Uncommon courtesy.
Uncommon concern for others.
Thirdly, uncommon control.
Paul writes in this text, lovedoes not act unbecomingly.
It does not seek its own.
It is not provoked.
(15:17):
And now we're all going to throwup the white flag.
Well, it gets worse when youfind out what he means.
The Greek word is transliteratedto give us our word paroxysms,
fits of anger.
By the way, it can have apositive meaning.
This provoking.
The same word is used in Hebrews10, 24.
Provoke one another unto loveand good works.
(15:42):
So that word can have a positiveimpact.
He's speaking of it in anegative, passive sense that it
is not provoked in the form ofirritation.
You read this phrase, andimmediately every one of us has
to say, well, guilty.
Who can live without beingprovoked, right?
(16:04):
It does no good, by the way, inthe face of this text, to say,
well, I lose my temper a lot,but you know, it's over in a few
seconds.
So is a nuclear bomb.
Rare love develops and growsinto this demonstration of
(16:26):
uncommon control.
It's good to see it in publicevery once in a while, isn't it?
One author I was reading wroteabout being on a flight where
two young children were sittingnear him.
You've been on those flightsbefore?
They were arguing and fussingand quirling.
Anyway, the flight attendantknew exactly how to handle them.
(16:46):
She went over to their seats andshe smiled at them and she said,
What's all the squawking goingon over here?
The children grew quiet.
She leaned over them and said ina serious voice, I must remind
you, this is a non-squawkingflight.
And it worked.
(17:09):
Paul is effectively saying truelove views life as a
non-squawking flight.
And he's telling us to usgrown-ups.
And since it takes two people tohave a provocation with the kind
that he has in mind, Paul issaying, you are to refuse to
(17:33):
become the second person.
You read this phrase, love isnot provoked, and you think,
yeah, all right, Paul, youdidn't expect me to take this
literally.
This verse is for people likeapostles or dead people.
They can't be provoked.
This is a verse for Paul.
(17:53):
No, again, the secret touncommon control is not that you
have some sort of amazingself-control.
This is spirit, Christ control.
Roy Lauren said to be masteredby this love is the same as
being mastered by Christ.
And again, I go back to this,and let me make sure that I have
(18:15):
said it clearly enough as we'rehalfway through these verbs.
Agape is impossible.
It is not difficult.
It's impossible.
That's why the fruit of theSpirit is first and foremost
(18:37):
what?
Love.
The Lord had already begun toreveal this radical control,
this refusal to be provoked indifficult situations when he
preached his sermon on themount.
Very quickly, I want you to goback to Matthew 5.
Would you just turn there very,very quickly?
Matthew 5, verse 39.
(19:00):
He brings up a couple ofsituations where you would get
provoked.
And he's teaching his disciplesto show restraint and control
that they will earn is thecontrol of the Spirit of God.
He says in verse 39, but I sayto you, do not resist an evil
person, but whoever slaps you onyour right cheek, turn the other
(19:24):
to him also.
I mean, this is the ultimateprovocation, isn't it?
If somebody slaps you on theright cheek, turn and let them
slap you again.
Now, most people misunderstandwhat Christ is saying.
They think this is referring toletting somebody punch you in
the face and then turning andsaying, you can have one more
shot before I put you in thehospital.
(19:47):
No, that's not what Christ issaying.
This is effectively the samedemonstration of control that
Paul will refer to in 1Corinthians 13.
Now, what I want to do, and Ithink the best way to teach this
is to illustrate it physically.
So what I'd like to do is, if Icould, get a volunteer to come
up here that I could hit.
(20:09):
Okay, David, I saw that hand.
Come on up here.
Come on.
I'm going to slap David, andwe're going to watch his
response.
Now, if you look at your text,there's something very critical
here.
Jesus Christ specifically refersto being slapped on which cheek?
(20:32):
Which cheek?
That one.
Now, most of the world happensto be right-handed.
Right?
So the only way that I can slapDavid on this cheek with this
hand is to do this.
Right?
Come on, now you'reexaggerating.
(20:56):
This way right here.
And then to turn the other cheekwould mean that this person
could give then anotherbackhand.
What this is referring to inChrist's day is one of the most
insulting things you could everdo to anybody.
It's take your hand, whichrepresents your authority and
dignity, your personhood, andgive someone the back of it.
(21:19):
So Jesus Christ is saying, ifsomebody provokes you to that
degree, insults you, which isthe point, be willing to be
insulted again.
And you would be willing,wouldn't you?
Thank you very much, David.
What great self-control.
Thank you very much.
(21:44):
To refuse to be provoked means acouple of things.
First of all, it means you arewilling to forfeit personal
dignity.
Now look down further, verse 41.
Another one that we wouldn'treally understand.
Whoever forces you to go onemile, go with him two.
(22:08):
Again, the generation of theLord and of Paul would know
immediately what he's talkingabout here.
If somebody compels you to go amile, go with him too.
During these days, the law ofthe land gave the Roman soldier
the right to impress any citizenor any alien, Jew or Gentile,
(22:30):
into personal valet service.
They could immediately impressanybody to carry their heavy
gear.
Hey, you come up here, carry mygear.
And Jesus said, you know, themost gracious thing somebody
could ever do is go with them amile.
(22:52):
Now they had to anyway, but itwould be gracious if they didn't
mutter all along.
Million, the word for, the Latinword for mile.
And they they considered a mile,1,000 steps.
And so that person that'simpressed in the service, you
can imagine, and they often didit audibly.
They began to count off as theywalked, carrying that heavy gear
(23:15):
out of total frustration.
One, two, three, four, five,six, seven, nine hundred and
ninety-eight, nine hundred andninety-nine, a thousand.
And they could throw it down.
You have been inconveniencedenough.
You've gone to the ladder of thelaw, Jesus says, look at your
(23:39):
text again.
If you're compelled to go onemile, go two.
Can you imagine the surprise ofa Roman soldier?
And you telling him, look, Iknow you've impressed upon me to
walk a mile, and I have to bylaw, but I want you to know I
serve a higher law.
It is the law of love, and lovefor Christ compels me to go
(24:05):
another 1,000 steps with yourgear.
Which meant that he would walktwo miles out of the way and two
miles back.
Four miles.
Never mind your afternoon plans.
Love that refuses to be provokedis first willing to forfeit
(24:30):
personal dignity, and secondly,willing to forfeit personal
inconvenience, which makes thisso rare and precious.
Instead of provocation, it isprocession for one thousand more
steps.
(24:51):
You went one mile, you'll go twomiles.
This is where we get the phrasewe still use to this day going
the extra mile.
It came right out of there.
This is indeed uncommon.
It is rare love, but it isundeniably real.
(25:14):
See, he puts it down where welive and where we struggle.
And so when we respond with thelove of Christ, it is
immediately obvious that we arecontrolled by the Spirit.
Ladies and gentlemen, some guyis gonna eventually die with a
(25:36):
twenty dollar gold coin in hissafe.
And what good did it do him butto give him somehow the
impression that he had spent hismoney well and now owned
something valuable because itwas rare.
Listen, the most valuable thingsin your life are indeed rare,
(25:59):
but they are not kept in a safe.
They are lived out in your life.
Especially this rare thingcalled true love that
demonstrates these uncommonexpressions, uncommon courtesy,
uncommon concern, uncommoncontrol.
(26:22):
Would any of us not agree withPaul that this is true love?
SPEAKER_00 (26:41):
With that powerful illustration, we bring today's
message to a close.
I hope that image sticks withyou and that you'll value what
is truly precious in this life.
This is Wisdom for the Heartwith your Bible teacher, Stephen
Davy.
The lesson you just heard iscalled uncommonly rare,
(27:03):
undeniably real.
It comes from Stephen's seriesin 1 Corinthians 13 called True
Love.
I want to make you aware thatduring this series, the CD set
is available at a deeplydiscounted rate.
This is an eight-part teachingseries.
We've taken all eight messagesand put them together as a set
(27:26):
of compact disks.
Give us a call today at 866-48Bible.
That's 866-48 Bible or866-482-4253.
When you call, the series you'relooking for is called True Love.
(27:46):
You'll also find this resourceavailable online, and you can
read Steven's manuscript foreach message.
Or you can visit the store andget the CD set.
That's wisdomonline.org.
Join us next time for moreWisdom for the Heart.
Ladies and gentlemen, some guy is gonna
eventually die with a twentydollar gold coin in his safe.
And what good did it do him?
But to give him somehow theimpression that he had spent his
money well and now ownedsomething valuable because it
(00:28):
was rare.
Listen, the most valuable thingsin your life are indeed rare,
but they are not kept in a safe.
They are lived out in your life.
SPEAKER_00 (00:53):
Often the most valuable things in the world are
the uncommon things.
As believers, we need to cherishwhat is uncommon, but not in the
way that the world does.
Uncommon courtesy, uncommonconcern, uncommon self-control.
Those are all aspects of themost uncommon thing in the whole
(01:16):
world.
Uncommonly true love.
Unlike other valuablepossessions, true love is never
hidden away in a safe orlockbox.
True love is constantly spendingitself on others.
Today, Stephen Davy continueshis series entitled True Love
(01:36):
with this message calleduncommonly rare, undeniably
real.
SPEAKER_01 (01:45):
Since it was minted in 1933, one particular gold
coin has been stolen, shipped toEgypt, destroyed, almost
destroyed by fire twice andhidden for years.
It is the double eagle$20 goldcoin, an ounce of nearly pure
(02:11):
gold.
When it went up for auction justa few years ago, it sold for an
amazing amount of money.
It all started during the daysof the Great Depression.
During the worst years of theDepression, people were hoarding
their gold out of fear, and itwas undermining the nation's
financial system.
(02:31):
As soon as Franklin DelanoRoosevelt became president, by
executive order, he took theUnited States off the gold
standard, and payment foranything by gold was now
prohibited.
Thousands of citizens exchangedtheir now worthless gold at
banks for cash.
(02:52):
Only problem is somebody forgotto tell uh or send a memo to the
U.S.
Mint to stop making these goldcoins.
And they produced hundreds ofthousands of these$20 gold coins
until they got the memo andstopped.
All of the uh coins never leftthe mint.
They were melted down, and thatwas the end of it.
(03:13):
All except for 10 of them.
Ten coins that the U.S.
Mint's chief cashier had stolen.
Eventually, after a number ofyears, the Secret Service were
able to track down all of thembut one.
The tenth and only remainingdouble eagle had landed in the
(03:36):
collection of the king of Egypt,a man who had an interesting
penchant for collections.
He collected old aspirinbottles, used razor blades,
stamps, and coins.
In 1952, this last double eaglewas to be returned to the U.S.
(03:58):
after this Egyptian king died.
It never made it.
It somehow disappeared again.
Fort years later, it showed upin the hands of a dealer in
1966, claimed to be thelegitimate owner.
He ended up going to court andbattling the U.S.
government over ownership ofthis coin.
(04:20):
During the court battle, thecoin was placed in what seemed
to be a secure location, a vaultat the World Trade Center.
If you can imagine it, just daysbefore 9-11, it was moved to
Fort Knox, where the governmentagreed to release the coin and
sell it at auction and split theproceeds with the dealer.
(04:42):
When it went up for auction, ananonymous telephone bidder won
the bid and purchased the$20double legal coin for$7.6
million.
Can you imagine?
$7 million for a$20 coin you'llnever spend.
(05:08):
Why the incredible value?
And frankly, why all theinterest that is spanned now?
Nearly a century.
Well, it's because it's it's oneof a kind.
There's no other coin in theworld like it.
Rare things are treateddifferently than common things,
(05:31):
aren't they?
I believe it was the greattheologian Mark Twain who once
said, if stones were rare anddiamonds commonplace, we would
be wearing rocks for jewelry andthrowing diamonds at stray dogs.
It's true.
(05:52):
Now, if you're like me and youwouldn't spend any more than$20
for a$20 coin.
The truth remains, the moreuncommonly rare something is,
the more valuable it becomes.
In 1 Corinthians 13, we havebeen exploring the rare
(06:12):
sightings of genuine, authentic,uncommon love.
We've contrasted it thus farwith the loves of the world, the
passion, epithet, the eros, thestorge, the philia of the world.
And we've discovered the rarebeauty of agape.
We have noted thus far theabsolute necessity of this kind
(06:34):
of love.
In fact, if we have amazingcharacter qualities and ministry
dynamic, if we do not have love,we might as well all just grab a
pair of symbols and make a lotof noise, right?
By the way, I got to tell you,when I preached at Dallas
Seminary, I preached these threemessages, and I don't think it's
(06:54):
ever happened in Chaefer Chapelbefore, but I played the
symbols.
I played my symbol solo.
They will forget me, but theywill never, ever forget the
symbols.
No, actually, we had a great,great time.
Next, we began to explore howlove acts.
And remember, verses four toseven are not adjectives, they
(07:16):
are 15 action verbs.
This is not what love is.
This is what love does.
Now we've arrived at verse five,where I was immediately struck
by the simplicity of love'sactivity.
Let's take a few more wordshere, action verbs tonight.
(07:38):
Paul writes in verse five lovedoes not act unbecomingly.
These phrases are so down toearth.
The description of the way loveacts is so obvious here, isn't
(08:02):
it?
In fact, uh, reminds me of oneof my friends would say this is
not rocket surgery.
That's deep for a Sunday night.
You hang with me.
But listen, what is obvious tous is that this is rare.
These are the actions, theseactions are really like double
(08:25):
eagle coins.
Not only are they rarely seen inpublic, they are becoming more
and more uncommon in the churchtoday.
They're hardly surfacing at all.
These are expressions ofselfless, willful, committed,
true love.
And as we work through thesethree verbs, let me just call
them three uncommon or threerare expressions of love.
(08:48):
The first is uncommon courtesy.
Paul begins this verse bysaying, love does not act
unbecomingly.
You could translate this agapedoes not treat others rudely.
One author translates it, lovedoes not behave indecently.
(09:11):
In the Corinthian church, bycontrast, they were selfishly
overindulging at the lovefeasts.
We talked a little bit aboutthat this morning.
Even to the point ofdrunkenness, 1 Corinthians 11,
20 to 22.
They were suing one another forall sorts of things in chapter
6, verses 1 to 7.
They were hogging the floor andtaking over the assembly with
(09:33):
their own personal agendas, 1Corinthians 14, 26.
In fact, in verse 27, Paul evenhad to ask them to take turns
speaking, and not all at once,as they clamored to be heard.
This was becoming then thisunbecoming nature of love, more
(09:56):
and more rare, this uncommonexpression of courtesy.
This is, ladies and gentlemen,frankly put, this is
tactfulness.
Someone once said that tact ismaking people feel at home when
you really wish they were.
(10:19):
One author wrote that this verbfor rude or unbecoming conveys
the idea of inappropriate dress,immodest dress, inconsiderate
talk, disregard for otherpeople's time, taking advantage
of people, running roughshodover others' plans and
(10:42):
interests, inappropriatebehavior with the opposite sex,
basic discourtesy and rudeness,and a general disregard for
proper social conduct are allevidences of this one verb that
Paul would consider the oppositeof true love.
By the way, this phrase canrefer then to being
(11:05):
inconsiderate of how yourbehavior might affect somebody
else even in little things.
This has to do with the mannersour moms tried to teach us.
This is the courteousness, thesensitivity to other people.
(11:26):
And Paul is speaking in suchobvious language, he says, love
is like that.
It can come down to earth insuch basic ways.
Just being sensitive in littlethings.
(11:46):
Uncommon courtesy is synonymouswith true love.
Paul goes on in this text torefer secondly to what we'll
just call tonight uncommonconcern.
He writes in verse 5 love doesnot act unbecomingly, it does
not seek its own.
In other words, love does notinsist on its own way.
(12:09):
Paul kind of brings out thisrare coin in public view of the
Corinthians.
In fact, he does it time andtime again, and they just
weren't getting it.
He said in chapter 10, I try toplease everyone in everything I
do.
How?
Not seeking my own advantage,but that of many.
It doesn't mean he shelved thetruth.
It simply meant that when he gotaround Paul, he'd tell you the
(12:31):
truth in love, but he alsowanted your best.
He wanted your advantage.
He wanted to promote you.
He wanted to talk about you.
He wanted to help you.
That was the Paul.
He said in chapter 9, for thoughI am free, I have made myself a
slave to all.
A few verses earlier in chapter10, he challenged the
(12:53):
Corinthians with this Let no oneseek his own advantage but that
of another.
Then here in chapter 13, lovedoes not seek its own.
There are two kinds of people inthis regard: those who insist
upon their own privileges, andthose who never quite forget
their own responsibilities.
(13:15):
Those who are always thinking ofwhat life owes them, and those
who never quite get over thefact that they owe life.
Agape is rare because agape isan uncommon concern for others.
It is the selfless pursuit ofanother's blessing.
And the reason it is soremarkable is you rarely see it
(13:40):
in public.
Selfless, self-defacing,self-promoting, self-sacrificing
love.
But listen, seeking your own,which would be to flip this coin
over, that's the law.
(14:11):
This is the opposite ofselfishness.
Love the way Lensky penned thisrather provocative statement in
this particular commentary onthis passage.
He said this if you can cureselfishness, you replant the
Garden of Eden.
True love is always unselfish.
(14:31):
And how easy to say, right?
Man, how hard to live out.
That's why selfishness is ascommon as rocks.
And unselfish living is as rareas a double legal twenty dollar
coin.
(14:51):
Uncommon courtesy.
Uncommon concern for others.
Thirdly, uncommon control.
Paul writes in this text, lovedoes not act unbecomingly.
It does not seek its own.
It is not provoked.
(15:17):
And now we're all going to throwup the white flag.
Well, it gets worse when youfind out what he means.
The Greek word is transliteratedto give us our word paroxysms,
fits of anger.
By the way, it can have apositive meaning.
This provoking.
The same word is used in Hebrews10, 24.
Provoke one another unto loveand good works.
(15:42):
So that word can have a positiveimpact.
He's speaking of it in anegative, passive sense that it
is not provoked in the form ofirritation.
You read this phrase, andimmediately every one of us has
to say, well, guilty.
Who can live without beingprovoked, right?
(16:04):
It does no good, by the way, inthe face of this text, to say,
well, I lose my temper a lot,but you know, it's over in a few
seconds.
So is a nuclear bomb.
Rare love develops and growsinto this demonstration of
(16:26):
uncommon control.
It's good to see it in publicevery once in a while, isn't it?
One author I was reading wroteabout being on a flight where
two young children were sittingnear him.
You've been on those flightsbefore?
They were arguing and fussingand quirling.
Anyway, the flight attendantknew exactly how to handle them.
(16:46):
She went over to their seats andshe smiled at them and she said,
What's all the squawking goingon over here?
The children grew quiet.
She leaned over them and said ina serious voice, I must remind
you, this is a non-squawkingflight.
And it worked.
(17:09):
Paul is effectively saying truelove views life as a
non-squawking flight.
And he's telling us to usgrown-ups.
And since it takes two people tohave a provocation with the kind
that he has in mind, Paul issaying, you are to refuse to
(17:33):
become the second person.
You read this phrase, love isnot provoked, and you think,
yeah, all right, Paul, youdidn't expect me to take this
literally.
This verse is for people likeapostles or dead people.
They can't be provoked.
This is a verse for Paul.
(17:53):
No, again, the secret touncommon control is not that you
have some sort of amazingself-control.
This is spirit, Christ control.
Roy Lauren said to be masteredby this love is the same as
being mastered by Christ.
And again, I go back to this,and let me make sure that I have
(18:15):
said it clearly enough as we'rehalfway through these verbs.
Agape is impossible.
It is not difficult.
It's impossible.
That's why the fruit of theSpirit is first and foremost
(18:37):
what?
Love.
The Lord had already begun toreveal this radical control,
this refusal to be provoked indifficult situations when he
preached his sermon on themount.
Very quickly, I want you to goback to Matthew 5.
Would you just turn there very,very quickly?
Matthew 5, verse 39.
(19:00):
He brings up a couple ofsituations where you would get
provoked.
And he's teaching his disciplesto show restraint and control
that they will earn is thecontrol of the Spirit of God.
He says in verse 39, but I sayto you, do not resist an evil
person, but whoever slaps you onyour right cheek, turn the other
(19:24):
to him also.
I mean, this is the ultimateprovocation, isn't it?
If somebody slaps you on theright cheek, turn and let them
slap you again.
Now, most people misunderstandwhat Christ is saying.
They think this is referring toletting somebody punch you in
the face and then turning andsaying, you can have one more
shot before I put you in thehospital.
(19:47):
No, that's not what Christ issaying.
This is effectively the samedemonstration of control that
Paul will refer to in 1Corinthians 13.
Now, what I want to do, and Ithink the best way to teach this
is to illustrate it physically.
So what I'd like to do is, if Icould, get a volunteer to come
up here that I could hit.
(20:09):
Okay, David, I saw that hand.
Come on up here.
Come on.
I'm going to slap David, andwe're going to watch his
response.
Now, if you look at your text,there's something very critical
here.
Jesus Christ specifically refersto being slapped on which cheek?
(20:32):
Which cheek?
That one.
Now, most of the world happensto be right-handed.
Right?
So the only way that I can slapDavid on this cheek with this
hand is to do this.
Right?
Come on, now you'reexaggerating.
(20:56):
This way right here.
And then to turn the other cheekwould mean that this person
could give then anotherbackhand.
What this is referring to inChrist's day is one of the most
insulting things you could everdo to anybody.
It's take your hand, whichrepresents your authority and
dignity, your personhood, andgive someone the back of it.
(21:19):
So Jesus Christ is saying, ifsomebody provokes you to that
degree, insults you, which isthe point, be willing to be
insulted again.
And you would be willing,wouldn't you?
Thank you very much, David.
What great self-control.
Thank you very much.
(21:44):
To refuse to be provoked means acouple of things.
First of all, it means you arewilling to forfeit personal
dignity.
Now look down further, verse 41.
Another one that we wouldn'treally understand.
Whoever forces you to go onemile, go with him two.
(22:08):
Again, the generation of theLord and of Paul would know
immediately what he's talkingabout here.
If somebody compels you to go amile, go with him too.
During these days, the law ofthe land gave the Roman soldier
the right to impress any citizenor any alien, Jew or Gentile,
(22:30):
into personal valet service.
They could immediately impressanybody to carry their heavy
gear.
Hey, you come up here, carry mygear.
And Jesus said, you know, themost gracious thing somebody
could ever do is go with them amile.
(22:52):
Now they had to anyway, but itwould be gracious if they didn't
mutter all along.
Million, the word for, the Latinword for mile.
And they they considered a mile,1,000 steps.
And so that person that'simpressed in the service, you
can imagine, and they often didit audibly.
They began to count off as theywalked, carrying that heavy gear
(23:15):
out of total frustration.
One, two, three, four, five,six, seven, nine hundred and
ninety-eight, nine hundred andninety-nine, a thousand.
And they could throw it down.
You have been inconveniencedenough.
You've gone to the ladder of thelaw, Jesus says, look at your
(23:39):
text again.
If you're compelled to go onemile, go two.
Can you imagine the surprise ofa Roman soldier?
And you telling him, look, Iknow you've impressed upon me to
walk a mile, and I have to bylaw, but I want you to know I
serve a higher law.
It is the law of love, and lovefor Christ compels me to go
(24:05):
another 1,000 steps with yourgear.
Which meant that he would walktwo miles out of the way and two
miles back.
Four miles.
Never mind your afternoon plans.
Love that refuses to be provokedis first willing to forfeit
(24:30):
personal dignity, and secondly,willing to forfeit personal
inconvenience, which makes thisso rare and precious.
Instead of provocation, it isprocession for one thousand more
steps.
(24:51):
You went one mile, you'll go twomiles.
This is where we get the phrasewe still use to this day going
the extra mile.
It came right out of there.
This is indeed uncommon.
It is rare love, but it isundeniably real.
(25:14):
See, he puts it down where welive and where we struggle.
And so when we respond with thelove of Christ, it is
immediately obvious that we arecontrolled by the Spirit.
Ladies and gentlemen, some guyis gonna eventually die with a
(25:36):
twenty dollar gold coin in hissafe.
And what good did it do him butto give him somehow the
impression that he had spent hismoney well and now owned
something valuable because itwas rare.
Listen, the most valuable thingsin your life are indeed rare,
(25:59):
but they are not kept in a safe.
They are lived out in your life.
Especially this rare thingcalled true love that
demonstrates these uncommonexpressions, uncommon courtesy,
uncommon concern, uncommoncontrol.
(26:22):
Would any of us not agree withPaul that this is true love?
SPEAKER_00 (26:41):
With that powerful illustration, we bring today's
message to a close.
I hope that image sticks withyou and that you'll value what
is truly precious in this life.
This is Wisdom for the Heartwith your Bible teacher, Stephen
Davy.
The lesson you just heard iscalled uncommonly rare,
(27:03):
undeniably real.
It comes from Stephen's seriesin 1 Corinthians 13 called True
Love.
I want to make you aware thatduring this series, the CD set
is available at a deeplydiscounted rate.
This is an eight-part teachingseries.
We've taken all eight messagesand put them together as a set
(27:26):
of compact disks.
Give us a call today at 866-48Bible.
That's 866-48 Bible or866-482-4253.
When you call, the series you'relooking for is called True Love.
(27:46):
You'll also find this resourceavailable online, and you can
read Steven's manuscript foreach message.
Or you can visit the store andget the CD set.
That's wisdomonline.org.
Join us next time for moreWisdom for the Heart.
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