What if success didn’t have to come with stress, hustle, and emotional burnout? Performance coach Brandi Hudson joins Melissa Joy to share how high-achievers can shift from chasing external validation to building a life rooted in purpose, clarity, and peace.
Brandy introduces her powerful BASE framework—Beliefs, Alignment, Self-Awareness, and Emotional Resilience—a mindset map for those ready to evolve from achievement to mastery. Together, they explore the inner work it takes to untangle limiting beliefs, align your desires with your emotions, and build true emotional resilience so that success actually feels successful.
This conversation is for the doers, the leaders, the “check-the-box” professionals who suspect there’s more waiting on the other side of the hustle.
💡 Key Themes Covered:
- Rethinking success: Why accomplishments alone don't guarantee fulfillment
- How subconscious beliefs quietly shape your relationship with money, health, and love
- The difference between wanting money and understanding what you actually want it for
- Why emotional resilience is the ultimate leadership skill
- Tools to align your internal world with your external goals
Connect with Brandi Hudson
🔗 Facebook: facebook.com/hibrandihudson
📸 Instagram: @brandibhudson
▶️ YouTube: @brandibhudson
🐦 X (formerly Twitter): @brandibhudson
💼 LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/brandibhudson
The previous presentation by PEARL PLANNING was intended for general information purposes only. No portion of the presentation serves as the receipt of, or as a substitute for, personalized investment advice from PEARL PLANNING or any other investment professional of your choosing. Different types of investments involve varying degrees of risk, and it should not be assumed that future performance of any specific investment or investment strategy, or any non-investment related or planning services, discussion or content, will be profitable, be suitable for your portfolio or individual situation, or prove successful. Neither PEARL PLANNING’s investment adviser registration status, nor any amount of prior experience or success, should be construed that a certain level of results or satisfaction will be achieved if PEARL PLANNING is engaged, or continues to be engaged, to provide investment advisory services. PEARL PLANNING is neither a law firm nor accounting firm, and no portion of its services should be construed as legal or accounting advice. No portion of the video content should be construed by a client or prospective client as a guarantee that he/she will experience a certain level of results if PEARL PLANNING is engaged, or continues to be engaged, to provide investment advisory services. A copy of PEARL PLANNING’s current written disclosure Brochure discussing our advisory services and fees is available upon request or at https:...
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to the Women's Money Wisdom Podcast.
I'm Melissa Joy, a certifiedfinancial planner and the
founder of Pearl Planning.
My goal is to help youstreamline and organize your
finances, navigate big moneydecisions with confidence and be
strategic in order to grow yourwealth.
As a woman, you work hard foryour money and I'm here to help
(00:21):
you make the most of it.
Now let's get into the show.
What if I told you that thingsdidn't have to have as much
stress and pressure to stillhave success?
That is what we're going to betalking about today with Brandi
Hudson, who is a performancecoach, and she coaches
(00:45):
accomplished professionals readyto move from achievement to
mastery.
We're going to talk aboutBrandy's base framework beliefs,
alignment, self-awareness andemotional resilience and how
that framework can help you tolive life on purpose, with
mastery and just less pressure.
I can't wait for thisdiscussion personally, brandy,
(01:07):
welcome to the podcast.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
Thank you so much for having me.
I'm really excited for ourconversation as well.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
Well, I know, just as I was preparing for this
episode, I was thinking back tomy career and there was a point
in time where I'd kind ofclimbed the mountain I thought
I'd always wanted to climb andthere was so much anticipation
of how it was going to feel whenI got to that moment of you
know kind of career success.
And I got there and none of thepot of gold was not waiting for
(01:38):
me at the end of the rainbow.
And I kind of feel like thatmight be something we're talking
about today is like how tomanage yourself in your career,
in your life.
But tell me, how did you getstarted doing this work?
Speaker 2 (01:51):
Yeah, I think my story is so similar to yours
when I think back to being alittle girl in Detroit.
I was born to teenage parentsand we were really like our
consciousness in our house wasaround success, right, and it
was really a way of building agreat, big, beautiful life that
when I was first born I didn'tnecessarily have access to, and
(02:12):
so there was always this throughline of like the more
accomplishment, the more successthat you have, the more
financial stability you have thehappier you will be, and it
wasn't necessarily stated, butit was definitely implied.
So I I started out on thistrajectory of, like you know,
always getting the best grades.
I was an athlete and so always,you know, finishing first.
(02:34):
I was president of everything,you know, captain of all the
things, and then I went to youknow, really great schools for
undergrad and business school.
I tried out for the Olympics inbetween, and suddenly you know
really great schools forundergrad and business school.
I tried out for the Olympics inbetween, and suddenly you know,
there I was.
But suddenly I found myself likea VP at a you know fortune 500
company, running a big team, youknow, with huge responsibility.
(02:57):
I, I didn't love it, so Ipivoted.
And then I went to a startupand I was like you want to be in
a startup, you want to, youknow, have a different
experience.
And then the startup didexceptionally well and I was
like, oh, I still don't lovethis.
And so suddenly you realizethat, like you're on a never
ending treadmill, it's true, andwhen?
you're on a never endingtreadmill, you realize like I
(03:19):
must be looking for the wrongthing and so.
I actually took a step back.
I was very fortunate to be in aposition where I didn't have to
work, so I took a step back andsaid I'm just going to work
with myself for a little bit andI'm going to seek to understand
.
I fundamentally knew the sameskills that had allowed me to
achieve a high level of successin life and in my career would
(03:41):
also be in service to meunderstanding how I could get
off that treadmill.
And so I spent actually like acouple years just in
self-reflection, self-care, youknow, reading, learning,
researching.
And then that is when I decidedto start my practice and I
(04:01):
built out a framework of howpeople actually build a life
that feels as good as it looks.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
Oh, what does that even look or feel like?
I bet so many of us are, youknow, just invested in.
Tell me more.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Yeah, I think building the life or the
framework.
I want to make sure I answer.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Well, let's start with the life, and then I can't
wait to hear about so I think we, we all look outside of
ourselves and we see someonewith this life.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
That looks good, right, they've checked all the
boxes, right.
Perhaps they have a partner inlife that they feel very happy
with, perhaps they have a child.
They've, you know, accumulateda level of wealth that feels as
though they don't have to worryabout the next thing.
Their health is in reasonableshape and we're like, wow,
they've checked all the boxesand that life looks really good.
(04:52):
And oftentimes, when you like,sit and speak to that person,
they're not as happy as theywould like to be.
They do feel a lot of pressureto sustain those things.
They don't feel as though it'sinevitable that the next thing
goal that they have, the nextachievement they'd like to make,
will come to them, and so forme, it's about helping people
(05:14):
realize that, like we win fromwithin, there's like nothing
external to us that is going tohelp us create the life that
we're looking for.
And when we do kind of theinner work, when we focus on
those soft skills thatoftentimes people leave to the
end, we can really like reverse.
Reverse our life and start tohave a life where we're like oh
(05:37):
man, I have checked all theboxes and I also deeply love the
life that I have.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
I am already moved by that framework of win from
within, because there are somany external signals that we
all receive, unless you're justin a vacuum without Wi-Fi and
social media.
But you know, everybody aroundyou puts their best foot forward
, for example on social media oreven when you're just checking
(06:06):
in with your friends and thingslike that, and so you know I
think the gap between realityand what you see and the signals
you see could not be wider.
So that really resonates withme that that success starting
from within.
Speaker 2 (06:23):
And I think that can be true, and I also think we've
started to use that as a way ofaccepting that our life doesn't
have to be so great.
So I think it's a tricky thingto think everything I see is a
facade and can't be real and soit's okay that my own life is in
shambles and obviously it'sthat big of a chasm.
(06:44):
But I also like I alwayschallenge my clients to watch
out for that because if youstart to believe that nothing is
real and so that it's okay tobe in this place, of those dense
emotions whether it be likeshame is the most dense fear
that you know things aren'tgoing to work out.
Anger that society's the way itis, you know like worry that
(07:06):
you won't reach your next goal,right Like then you start to
actually convince your brainthat it's okay to stay in that
place because everyone else isprobably also in that place and
they're just not telling meright, I mean the prevailing
forces too.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
You can just wake up every day, regardless of any of
the construct, of how you seethe world and and have reasons
to be.
You know, glass half empty,just right off the bat, and yeah
, and the only person that getsto live with that, you know,
perpetually.
Is you right?
It's you yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
So we want to instead just be in this place of like
what, what is my own inherentpotential?
Like what am I capable ofachieving in this lifetime, and
just focus starkly on that.
If we're, if we're not guided bythese external influences, then
we're more likely to align withwhat is possible for us, and I
(07:58):
think that's where the realmagic happens, right?
So we want to be in that spaceof like, knowing this is what I
was put on this planet to do,right, and I am capable of
achieving that right, becauseyou know for sure that if you
have a dream, then that dream ismeant for you, and then you
(08:19):
just have a stepwise approach, aframework that you work towards
it with.
And and I generally tell peoplethat when you're in that space,
then you're not going to becomparing yourself to other
people.
You're not.
You're no longer going to bechecking boxes, you're just
going to be like heads down,focused on like oh, this is like
what I am meant to do, this iswhy I'm here, and so this
(08:42):
inevitably does have to happen,and now I'm just going to take
action towards that and that'sactually going to feel really
good for almost people long.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
Oh, I love that.
So let's talk about thatframework, because I mean just
saying, oh no, you're, you havethis skill, these passions.
This is what you're here to do.
Please go with that Doesn'tsound like enough.
So how?
How are you tackling, you know,kind of the components or the
equation to to make it morepossible for you to embrace that
(09:14):
?
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Yeah, I love that.
I think, for me, I reallylanded in this place.
For me, I really landed in thisplace of like I really wanted
to work with people who hadalready accomplished a lot.
I think, as we think abouthaving shifts in our world
during this time, like our mostpowerful leaders should be in
this place, where they feelreally well resourced, because
(09:37):
then we know that they haveinfluence over the rest of the
world and and most accomplishedpeople have some sort of
framework, some sort of you knowstep-by-step process that
they're moving through.
So I was like okay how can weorganize this in a way so it
really makes sense to people?
So our base framework is reallyfoundational to building that
life that you're looking for.
When we think about each step,what we're going to see is it's
(10:01):
going to help us like reassess,like what are we really holding
on to and how do we view theworld.
So the first is, like, whatbeliefs do you have, right?
So, for instance, you know manyof your listeners, followers,
watchers, right Are are lookingthrough this lens around wealth
and money, right?
(10:22):
And what are the beliefs thatyou actually have around money?
So most successful humans,regardless of their like
background, think that havingmore money than they currently
have is hard.
They think they're going tohave to work hard.
It could be hard, like like I'mgoing to have to every day like
push, push, push, push, push inorder to get to whatever that
(10:45):
like final magical number thatthey're looking for, which is
usually like somewhere not veryclose to where they currently
are.
Right.
So so this idea that that it'shard, this idea like money
doesn't grow on trees, also likewhat are these ideas that you
have about our most wealthiesthumans that you have access to?
Like?
Sometimes, if you don't believethat the people with the most
(11:10):
money are good people, right, orthat they're doing good with
their money, that's also goingto create this chasm in your
brain.
So when we think about money,we want to think about money, in
this example, just as a neutralresource like we don't want to
have any beliefs about it havingmeaning, because money really
doesn't have meaning.
(11:30):
It's the person with the moneythat creates the meaning around
the money.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
So we want to pause there because I think that is so
important that money truly is aresource.
It's not whoever you know.
Ending your life with the most,the biggest pile of money for
most people, unless they haveextraordinary legacy goals that
they've really been intentionalabout, is not a success story.
But using money as a resourceto live a life of purpose and to
(11:58):
fulfill your personal goals is,to me, very worthy and a
success story.
So thank you for sharing that,because I could not agree more
that money is truly just aresource for you to live your
life and protect yourself aswell.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
Yeah, and everyone's entitled to it, right?
So, there's no one who is moreworthy of having money than
another, right, and if you, youalso have to believe that deeply
, like that you are actuallyworthy of having all the money
that you desire to have, becauseit's simply a resource and
(12:34):
there are ways to align to whatyou're seeking, right, and so we
want to assess our beliefsaround everything, right?
So money is one aspect of itwhich includes, like our career
and kind of like our ability tosave, like whatever that looks
like.
But we also want to do itaround our health and well-being
and we also want to do itaround our relationships, both
(12:55):
romantic and platonic.
And so when you do this likereally like thought diagnosis,
and understand, like, oh, theseare kind of the beliefs that I
have around these things, andthen I can shift them and why
beliefs matter, I mean, theymatter scientifically.
Some people sometimes think, oh, that's like a little bit, you
(13:16):
know, too spiritual or too woo,but they're scientific data that
if we have a belief aboutsomething that's disconnected
from what we're seeking, weactually put ourselves like in
this state of like pause,because our brain cannot move
towards something that feelsdissonant from us.
Right, so we want to have aresonance with the beliefs that
(13:39):
we have and what we're seeking.
Okay, so if we think onlycertain people are entitled to
money and our brain doesn't viewus as that type of person, then
we're not going to as easilyalign to it.
It won't be impossible, butit'll be like pushing a boulder
up a mountain.
Right.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
So when your clients come to you and you guys have
sussed out your you know a setof beliefs, are they saying to
you oh, I realized that myrelationship with money may be
flawed, or my money beliefs maybe flawed.
Or are you positing that tothem and saying, oh, this might
be a limiting belief or thismight be an obstacle to your
(14:17):
success?
How does that?
Speaker 2 (14:18):
work.
It happens in both ways.
However, I usually find that,like our trickiest, most
limiting beliefs are subtle andI usually hear it in the words
or the sentences that my clientsare saying, and then I reflect
it back to them and inevitablywhat they say is that's not what
(14:39):
I meant.
That's not the way the brainworks, right.
So, your initial thoughts.
The things that you are sayingare almost always reflective of
your like deeply held beliefs.
And so when we just simply pushthat away, that's our conscious
brain saying like I don't reallywant to believe that, Right.
But, it isn't.
(14:59):
But our, our brain, much likethe rest of our body, is run 95
percent off the subconscious,and so those subtle things that
you are saying are actually thecomputer that's running the show
.
The same way your heart beats,beats without you thinking about
it, the same way that yourlungs breathe without you
thinking about it.
The same way that your lungsbreathe without you thinking
about it, the majority of yourbrain works in that same way,
(15:22):
but we've convinced ourselvesthat our brain is the thing that
we control and everything elsein our body is working on
autopilot.
But every aspect of us isworking on autopilot and our
brain, just like our lungs andour heart, like, can be shifted,
but most often, more often thannot, are simply just moving
(15:42):
through, and so we want tonotice those subtle times where
we say something that's off,that's outside of what we want
to believe, instead of justpushing it away.
Speaker 1 (15:55):
So you, I mean the belief stage.
That's a challenge.
Like that is not a 30 minuteconversation where you just take
it and run with it.
Right, we're done with it.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
I mean I like to.
One of my beliefs is thatchange can be simple, right?
So I try not to believe for me,and I asked my clients not to
believe, that this is going tobe forever.
I'm not a therapist.
I don't want to hold on toclients for a lifetime.
I want to make you know asignificant change in a short
amount of time and then you knowpast that time.
(16:27):
Then they can come back and wedo check-ins.
But this work is really meantfor people to be able to
ultimately learn to do it ontheir own.
And that's where we get to thestep three.
But first I'll talk about steptwo.
Speaker 1 (16:38):
Let's do it.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
Let's do it, which is alignment.
And so alignment is this ideathat whatever you're seeking in
life, you really want tounderstand why you want it.
So oftentimes people think thatthey just want money.
But no one ever just wantsmoney because, like, if you just
wanted money, you put it in thebank.
But what do you actually wantthe money for, right, like, do
(17:00):
you want it for freedom?
Do you want it to travel?
Do you want it to have greaterexperiences?
Do you want to have a legacythat you pass on to your
children?
So you really want to have adepth of understanding of, like,
why you want something.
And then like, oh, when I havethat freedom, when I have those
experiences, what will it giveme?
and we really want to likededuce it to an emotion, like I
(17:23):
think I'll.
I'll feel peaceful when I havemore money, I'll feel happy when
I have more money, I'll feeljoy when I have more money, and
then the work is.
In order to have alignment, youactually need to feel that way
in advance.
So, what we oftentimes believeis that, like, when I get money
I'm going to be so peaceful andexcited, but until I get it I'm
(17:46):
going to worry and be anxiousand like and be fearful that
it's not going to work out, andthen that chasm is too broad and
then there's just too much totraverse.
And so happiness is ourbirthright.
We're meant to be happy themajority of the time, and what
(18:06):
we have found is that societyhasn't actually, like, stayed
with that.
We've come to believe thatthose dense emotions that I
mentioned earlier of worry, fear, anxiety, are normal.
Speaker 1 (18:20):
So we've gotten away from our inalienable rights.
Speaker 2 (18:22):
Exactly right?
In many ways, yes, we haveRight.
And so we want to start tothink like oh, when I am feeling
these dense emotions, it'sreally to tell me that I'm off
track, that I'm not on the rightpath.
The same way, pain comes totell me that like oh, I may need
to see a doctor.
You wouldn't be in pain forlike three weeks and think it
(18:45):
was normal.
But someone will worry about agoal for like weeks and days and
maybe even months on end, andjust be like that's normal, like
if I don't worry, it's notgoing to come to pass.
Speaker 3 (18:54):
Right.
Speaker 2 (18:58):
So we want to start to shift things so that we are
in those high vibration emotionsmore often than not, because
everything, including resources,are attracted to people who are
in those high vibrationemotions.
It actually puts you in, like,as we think about cause I like
to help people ground this inscience and data like it calms
(19:20):
our nervous system, which allowsus to move forward.
Those dense emotions put usinto a state of fight or flight
which is just a survival mode,and so you're not going to move
forward as quickly when we'renot in alignment with what we're
actually seeking.
Speaker 1 (19:36):
Interesting, yeah, and I couldn't agree more.
Like having that alignmentmakes a lot of sense.
So yeah, and why wait?
Speaker 2 (19:45):
And why wait Right and just know that's when the
path gets more and morechallenging, right?
Speaker 1 (19:52):
So you tackle part two, and then where are we at
with part three?
Speaker 2 (19:58):
Yes, and they're not in order, right.
We're doing these all kind oflike synergistically, but the S
is self-awareness, and this iswhat allows you to ultimately do
this work on your own Right.
So so there's three other steps, but self-awareness is kind of
the umbrella over all of them,where you can pick up cues when
you're like, oh, I'm off track,right, when I can easily see for
(20:21):
myself, like when I saysomething out loud, and I'm like
, oh, that's a limiting belief,I want to like work with that
today to help to alchemize it,to help to clear it Right, and
so we really want to be able to,more often than not, catch
ourselves when we're off track,so we don't always have to pay
someone to essentially hold up amirror.
(20:42):
I'm writing a book and my mybook editor says no one wants to
hear that, brandy, but I keepsaying it.
I do believe that everyone hasall the answers.
Like we do go to other peopleand we listen to podcasts, and
it's it's nice to be incommunity with one another.
We're actually meant to otherpeople and we listen to podcasts
, and it's it's nice to be incommunity with one another.
We're actually meant to be inthis lifetime, so you'll always
have other people, but you alsowant to have that like depth of
(21:06):
knowing that you do have allyour own answers and the more
introspective you can be, themore you can catch those little
things.
The more you're going to shiftyour life, the more quickly
you're going to shift your life.
Speaker 1 (21:19):
I see that to be true in working with people and
their financial decisions aswell.
You know some people it's justlike the basic skills that
they're ready to talk about andopen up about, which is, like
you know, having enough money inthe bank and a cash flow that
works positively, and thingslike that.
And of course then there's, youknow, additional degrees of
difficulty, whether it's taxplanning for successful, higher
(21:44):
earning people or retirementplanning, which can be more
complicated.
But then when you get to thepurpose and feelings side of
things, that you know thatdoesn't start off with everyone
right off the bat.
But if you can go there, ifyou're willing to open up about
those types of things andcontemplate them yourself first,
you know I can't, as an advisor, say, oh, let's get, let's dig
(22:07):
deep into purpose and yourfeelings with money right off
the bat, unless you're open toit.
And that is that you know kindof self-diagnosis.
Then that's where you know kindof truly extraordinary legacy
or or goals can can occur andeverybody's not ready for that
all at once, right, no,definitely not Right.
Speaker 2 (22:28):
And and also like we're constantly evolving, Right
.
So.
So sometimes you'll pull back alayer of an onion and you're
like I can like, tackle thisaspect of it now you may not
even know that consciously andand then later you're going to
come back, you know, to peelback another layer, and the
point isn't actually to solve itall right, like that's the
(22:50):
actual human experience.
Is that, or solve it all in onemoment, we solve it over time,
we continue to work with it andthe most important part is that
we just have grace withourselves as we go through the
process.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
Well, I think the process truly like thinking more
about the journey being thedestination.
In essence, like you know, you,instead of being, oh, we need
to end up here and then this youknow having, and I so see that
with your alignment stage right,like you can't be peaceful,
(23:26):
then if you're not peaceful now,thinking through the journey
being, you know, kind of thewhole point, and not waiting to
either live or enjoy or becomfortable.
That's such a big deal and ittakes work, right.
It just doesn't magicallyhappen, day to day, at least for
most of us, plus one, plus onefor that.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
That's so true.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
So true, so we've done number three and this is a
four step process, right yeah?
Speaker 2 (23:54):
So the fourth step tends to have we'll call it the
heaviest lift.
So the fourth step is reallyabout emotional resilience, and
so this is work that normallystarts like with some deep
reflection.
It may include a therapist Like.
It is really about like lookingback over the totality of your
(24:15):
life and and trying tounderstand what events that were
either stressful, littlet-traumatic or big t-traumatic
have occurred in your life thatare causing you to still hold on
to some of those dense emotionsthat we talked about right?
So when we have dense emotionsconnected to a past event, we
(24:36):
normally create patterns that insome way replicate that past
event in our current life.
And so the work that we need todo is to disentangle ourselves
from that stressful and ortraumatic event and keep the
wisdom of it, because no matterhow bad something is that has
happened to us, there's always awisdom that comes from it, and
(25:00):
we hold on to the wisdom and wereally release those dense
emotions.
You don't have to be happy thatit happened to you, but you do
want to be at that place of justlike neutrality right, so this
happened to me.
Neutrality, right so thishappened to me.
For me, I had this kind ofreally triggering encounter, and
(25:24):
any time someone would bring itup I would like find myself
crying about it and I wouldn'twant to talk about it.
And so that's how we know thatwe still haven't gotten to that
place of neutrality.
And now, if someone brings itup, I can have a conversation
about it.
I talk about it matter-of-factly.
It just is like a part of myhistory, but it doesn't define
me, and we let these stressfulor traumatic events begin to
define us when we aren't able tokind of do that work, do that
(25:48):
lift, to disentangle from it.
And so it is in our in serviceto ourselves and to our own good
to really kind of excavatethose happenings, even like
taking a piece of paper andwriting down like these are all
like the things that havehappened to me that I don't love
, and it can be from you know, aphysical, like car accident, to
(26:09):
like something you know, anencounter with another human and
everything kind of in between.
It could be a dog bite, itcould be a parent yelling at you
Everyone's brain interpretskind of stress and it could be a
teacher at a teacher.
One day stand me up in front ofthe room and make me pronounce
a word like 10 times becausethey said I was mispronouncing
it and that was like very like,bothersome to me, like anytime I
(26:32):
was asked, like called in frontof a room for like many, many
years.
I was like what's going tohappen up there?
Right and so, like looking backas an adult, that doesn't seem
so terrible.
But the little girl in me wasstill kind of holding on to the
energy of that moment, and so wejust want to assess those
things and and and start to dothe work.
(26:54):
You won't do it overnight,because you've lived an entire
life, but start to do the workto let those things go.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
I mean, I think you're describing skills that
equal resilience, and whetherit's managing your career,
managing your family, managingyour mindset or your approach to
money, resilience really is theunspoken thing that you need,
how everything is not going toalways go smoothly or as planned
(27:22):
.
There are surprises andopportunities that are positive
as well as traumatic and lossoriented.
But if you can build thatemotional resilience, then you
will be less likely to makedecisions and choices that are,
you know, based on fear andprotecting yourself but that may
derail kind of your long-termprospects.
(27:44):
So I think that is so powerfulto discuss.
Speaker 2 (27:47):
And what we start to see is, the more resilient we
are, the less those events showup in our lives.
So it's a skill set thatactually prepares you to no
longer have to deal with thevery thing you're prepared to
deal with.
So it's like a superpower to beresilient.
(28:08):
It helps you in all the waysand and you know, scientists
aren't sure is it because younow see the world differently or
is it because your experienceis after actually change?
But I don't think it matters.
What I think matters is thatyou're suddenly in this place
where you're feeling as thoughyou're moving through life in a
way that that no longer seemsheavy or seamless, or where
(28:30):
you're not always like watchingout for what might happen yeah,
that, that neuroplasticity, itchanges your brain right To be
more prepared to kind of makedecisions without your caveman,
your inner cave woman, kind ofmaking decisions out of fear.
Yes, our primal brain will kickin.
(28:51):
Yes, and we want to do our verybest to be using, you know, the
foremost portion of our brainas we're navigating life.
It just somehow always turnsout better that way.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
Well, based on this discussion, I know I'm going to
be thinking about this baseframework, the beliefs, the
alignment, theself-acknowledgement, the
self-awareness and emotionalintelligence.
I mean it's so important forall of us.
I love that you're doing thiswork with important leaders,
hopefully changing outcomes formany people.
(29:25):
Can you tell people how theycan find you if they're
interested in learning moreabout the work that you're doing
, brandy?
Speaker 2 (29:31):
Absolutely.
You can find me kind of like onevery single platform at Brandy
, with an I, brandy B, like boyHudson, like the river.
So Brandy B Hudson, that's mywebsite, instagram, youtube,
every platform.
We'll have all that in shownotes, yeah, so I'd love to
connect and you can also emailme at hello at hi Brandy dot com
(29:52):
.
H I Brandy, and I love to hearfrom people with any questions
that you have.
Or, just as I mentioned earlier, build community.
Well, will you rejoin us whenyour book comes out?
I would absolutely love to.
Speaker 1 (30:05):
That would be amazing and for everybody listening.
You know you might put thisepisode on a bookmark and when
you have those days that justyou know the traumatic events of
the past have resurfaced or youknow the traumatic events of
the past have resurfaced or youknow, you just feel that
something is off maybe you canre-listen and remind yourself
about these base skills that canreally help you to live life
(30:29):
with more success, moreresilient success and less
pressure.
I love that, for everybodydeserves that, absolutely.
Thanks for having me today.
Yeah, thanks for joining us,brandy.
Have a great day.
You do the same.
Bye now.
Speaker 3 (30:54):
Thank you for listening to the Women's Money
Wisdom Podcast.
If you found value in thisepisode, the best way that you
can support the podcast is toforward an episode to a friend
or leave a review.
Go to proplancom and thepodcast link to get all the
resources and links mentioned.
This presentation byProPlanning is intended for
general information purposesonly.
(31:14):
No portion of this presentationserves as a receipt of or a
substitute for personalinvestment advice from Pearl
Planning or any other investmentprofessional of your choosing.
Copies of Pearl Planning'scurrent rent and disclosure
brochure and form CRS discussingour advisory services and fees
are available upon request or onour website platform at
(31:35):
pearlplancom are available uponrequest or on our website
platform at pearlplancom.
The information that we shareis meant to educate and inspire,
not serve as personalizedfinancial advice.
Everyone's situation is unique,so be sure to consult with your
own financial professional forguidance that fits your life.
And just so you know, theopinions shared in this podcast
are Melissa's own and those ofher guests.
They don't necessarilyrepresent any organizations with
(31:58):
which Melissa is affiliated.
For more important disclosures,please go to our webpage at
proplancom.
Welcome to the Women's Money Wisdom Podcast.
I'm Melissa Joy, a certifiedfinancial planner and the
founder of Pearl Planning.
My goal is to help youstreamline and organize your
finances, navigate big moneydecisions with confidence and be
strategic in order to grow yourwealth.
As a woman, you work hard foryour money and I'm here to help
(00:21):
you make the most of it.
Now let's get into the show.
What if I told you that thingsdidn't have to have as much
stress and pressure to stillhave success?
That is what we're going to betalking about today with Brandi
Hudson, who is a performancecoach, and she coaches
(00:45):
accomplished professionals readyto move from achievement to
mastery.
We're going to talk aboutBrandy's base framework beliefs,
alignment, self-awareness andemotional resilience and how
that framework can help you tolive life on purpose, with
mastery and just less pressure.
I can't wait for thisdiscussion personally, brandy,
(01:07):
welcome to the podcast.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
Thank you so much for having me.
I'm really excited for ourconversation as well.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
Well, I know, just as I was preparing for this
episode, I was thinking back tomy career and there was a point
in time where I'd kind ofclimbed the mountain I thought
I'd always wanted to climb andthere was so much anticipation
of how it was going to feel whenI got to that moment of you
know kind of career success.
And I got there and none of thepot of gold was not waiting for
(01:38):
me at the end of the rainbow.
And I kind of feel like thatmight be something we're talking
about today is like how tomanage yourself in your career,
in your life.
But tell me, how did you getstarted doing this work?
Speaker 2 (01:51):
Yeah, I think my story is so similar to yours
when I think back to being alittle girl in Detroit.
I was born to teenage parentsand we were really like our
consciousness in our house wasaround success, right, and it
was really a way of building agreat, big, beautiful life that
when I was first born I didn'tnecessarily have access to, and
(02:12):
so there was always this throughline of like the more
accomplishment, the more successthat you have, the more
financial stability you have thehappier you will be, and it
wasn't necessarily stated, butit was definitely implied.
So I I started out on thistrajectory of, like you know,
always getting the best grades.
I was an athlete and so always,you know, finishing first.
(02:34):
I was president of everything,you know, captain of all the
things, and then I went to youknow, really great schools for
undergrad and business school.
I tried out for the Olympics inbetween, and suddenly you know
really great schools forundergrad and business school.
I tried out for the Olympics inbetween, and suddenly you know,
there I was.
But suddenly I found myself likea VP at a you know fortune 500
company, running a big team, youknow, with huge responsibility.
(02:57):
I, I didn't love it, so Ipivoted.
And then I went to a startupand I was like you want to be in
a startup, you want to, youknow, have a different
experience.
And then the startup didexceptionally well and I was
like, oh, I still don't lovethis.
And so suddenly you realizethat, like you're on a never
ending treadmill, it's true, andwhen?
you're on a never endingtreadmill, you realize like I
(03:19):
must be looking for the wrongthing and so.
I actually took a step back.
I was very fortunate to be in aposition where I didn't have to
work, so I took a step back andsaid I'm just going to work
with myself for a little bit andI'm going to seek to understand
.
I fundamentally knew the sameskills that had allowed me to
achieve a high level of successin life and in my career would
(03:41):
also be in service to meunderstanding how I could get
off that treadmill.
And so I spent actually like acouple years just in
self-reflection, self-care, youknow, reading, learning,
researching.
And then that is when I decidedto start my practice and I
(04:01):
built out a framework of howpeople actually build a life
that feels as good as it looks.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
Oh, what does that even look or feel like?
I bet so many of us are, youknow, just invested in.
Tell me more.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Yeah, I think building the life or the
framework.
I want to make sure I answer.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Well, let's start with the life, and then I can't
wait to hear about so I think we, we all look outside of
ourselves and we see someonewith this life.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
That looks good, right, they've checked all the
boxes, right.
Perhaps they have a partner inlife that they feel very happy
with, perhaps they have a child.
They've, you know, accumulateda level of wealth that feels as
though they don't have to worryabout the next thing.
Their health is in reasonableshape and we're like, wow,
they've checked all the boxesand that life looks really good.
(04:52):
And oftentimes, when you like,sit and speak to that person,
they're not as happy as theywould like to be.
They do feel a lot of pressureto sustain those things.
They don't feel as though it'sinevitable that the next thing
goal that they have, the nextachievement they'd like to make,
will come to them, and so forme, it's about helping people
(05:14):
realize that, like we win fromwithin, there's like nothing
external to us that is going tohelp us create the life that
we're looking for.
And when we do kind of theinner work, when we focus on
those soft skills thatoftentimes people leave to the
end, we can really like reverse.
Reverse our life and start tohave a life where we're like oh
(05:37):
man, I have checked all theboxes and I also deeply love the
life that I have.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
I am already moved by that framework of win from
within, because there are somany external signals that we
all receive, unless you're justin a vacuum without Wi-Fi and
social media.
But you know, everybody aroundyou puts their best foot forward
, for example on social media oreven when you're just checking
(06:06):
in with your friends and thingslike that, and so you know I
think the gap between realityand what you see and the signals
you see could not be wider.
So that really resonates withme that that success starting
from within.
Speaker 2 (06:23):
And I think that can be true, and I also think we've
started to use that as a way ofaccepting that our life doesn't
have to be so great.
So I think it's a tricky thingto think everything I see is a
facade and can't be real and soit's okay that my own life is in
shambles and obviously it'sthat big of a chasm.
(06:44):
But I also like I alwayschallenge my clients to watch
out for that because if youstart to believe that nothing is
real and so that it's okay tobe in this place, of those dense
emotions whether it be likeshame is the most dense fear
that you know things aren'tgoing to work out.
Anger that society's the way itis, you know like worry that
(07:06):
you won't reach your next goal,right Like then you start to
actually convince your brainthat it's okay to stay in that
place because everyone else isprobably also in that place and
they're just not telling meright, I mean the prevailing
forces too.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
You can just wake up every day, regardless of any of
the construct, of how you seethe world and and have reasons
to be.
You know, glass half empty,just right off the bat, and yeah
, and the only person that getsto live with that, you know,
perpetually.
Is you right?
It's you yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
So we want to instead just be in this place of like
what, what is my own inherentpotential?
Like what am I capable ofachieving in this lifetime, and
just focus starkly on that.
If we're, if we're not guided bythese external influences, then
we're more likely to align withwhat is possible for us, and I
(07:58):
think that's where the realmagic happens, right?
So we want to be in that spaceof like, knowing this is what I
was put on this planet to do,right, and I am capable of
achieving that right, becauseyou know for sure that if you
have a dream, then that dream ismeant for you, and then you
(08:19):
just have a stepwise approach, aframework that you work towards
it with.
And and I generally tell peoplethat when you're in that space,
then you're not going to becomparing yourself to other
people.
You're not.
You're no longer going to bechecking boxes, you're just
going to be like heads down,focused on like oh, this is like
what I am meant to do, this iswhy I'm here, and so this
(08:42):
inevitably does have to happen,and now I'm just going to take
action towards that and that'sactually going to feel really
good for almost people long.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
Oh, I love that.
So let's talk about thatframework, because I mean just
saying, oh no, you're, you havethis skill, these passions.
This is what you're here to do.
Please go with that Doesn'tsound like enough.
So how?
How are you tackling, you know,kind of the components or the
equation to to make it morepossible for you to embrace that
(09:14):
?
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Yeah, I love that.
I think, for me, I reallylanded in this place.
For me, I really landed in thisplace of like I really wanted
to work with people who hadalready accomplished a lot.
I think, as we think abouthaving shifts in our world
during this time, like our mostpowerful leaders should be in
this place, where they feelreally well resourced, because
(09:37):
then we know that they haveinfluence over the rest of the
world and and most accomplishedpeople have some sort of
framework, some sort of you knowstep-by-step process that
they're moving through.
So I was like okay how can weorganize this in a way so it
really makes sense to people?
So our base framework is reallyfoundational to building that
life that you're looking for.
When we think about each step,what we're going to see is it's
(10:01):
going to help us like reassess,like what are we really holding
on to and how do we view theworld.
So the first is, like, whatbeliefs do you have, right?
So, for instance, you know manyof your listeners, followers,
watchers, right Are are lookingthrough this lens around wealth
and money, right?
(10:22):
And what are the beliefs thatyou actually have around money?
So most successful humans,regardless of their like
background, think that havingmore money than they currently
have is hard.
They think they're going tohave to work hard.
It could be hard, like like I'mgoing to have to every day like
push, push, push, push, push inorder to get to whatever that
(10:45):
like final magical number thatthey're looking for, which is
usually like somewhere not veryclose to where they currently
are.
Right.
So so this idea that that it'shard, this idea like money
doesn't grow on trees, also likewhat are these ideas that you
have about our most wealthiesthumans that you have access to?
Like?
Sometimes, if you don't believethat the people with the most
(11:10):
money are good people, right, orthat they're doing good with
their money, that's also goingto create this chasm in your
brain.
So when we think about money,we want to think about money, in
this example, just as a neutralresource like we don't want to
have any beliefs about it havingmeaning, because money really
doesn't have meaning.
(11:30):
It's the person with the moneythat creates the meaning around
the money.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
So we want to pause there because I think that is so
important that money truly is aresource.
It's not whoever you know.
Ending your life with the most,the biggest pile of money for
most people, unless they haveextraordinary legacy goals that
they've really been intentionalabout, is not a success story.
But using money as a resourceto live a life of purpose and to
(11:58):
fulfill your personal goals is,to me, very worthy and a
success story.
So thank you for sharing that,because I could not agree more
that money is truly just aresource for you to live your
life and protect yourself aswell.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
Yeah, and everyone's entitled to it, right?
So, there's no one who is moreworthy of having money than
another, right, and if you, youalso have to believe that deeply
, like that you are actuallyworthy of having all the money
that you desire to have, becauseit's simply a resource and
(12:34):
there are ways to align to whatyou're seeking, right, and so we
want to assess our beliefsaround everything, right?
So money is one aspect of itwhich includes, like our career
and kind of like our ability tosave, like whatever that looks
like.
But we also want to do itaround our health and well-being
and we also want to do itaround our relationships, both
(12:55):
romantic and platonic.
And so when you do this likereally like thought diagnosis,
and understand, like, oh, theseare kind of the beliefs that I
have around these things, andthen I can shift them and why
beliefs matter, I mean, theymatter scientifically.
Some people sometimes think, oh, that's like a little bit, you
(13:16):
know, too spiritual or too woo,but they're scientific data that
if we have a belief aboutsomething that's disconnected
from what we're seeking, weactually put ourselves like in
this state of like pause,because our brain cannot move
towards something that feelsdissonant from us.
Right, so we want to have aresonance with the beliefs that
(13:39):
we have and what we're seeking.
Okay, so if we think onlycertain people are entitled to
money and our brain doesn't viewus as that type of person, then
we're not going to as easilyalign to it.
It won't be impossible, butit'll be like pushing a boulder
up a mountain.
Right.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
So when your clients come to you and you guys have
sussed out your you know a setof beliefs, are they saying to
you oh, I realized that myrelationship with money may be
flawed, or my money beliefs maybe flawed.
Or are you positing that tothem and saying, oh, this might
be a limiting belief or thismight be an obstacle to your
(14:17):
success?
How does that?
Speaker 2 (14:18):
work.
It happens in both ways.
However, I usually find that,like our trickiest, most
limiting beliefs are subtle andI usually hear it in the words
or the sentences that my clientsare saying, and then I reflect
it back to them and inevitablywhat they say is that's not what
(14:39):
I meant.
That's not the way the brainworks, right.
So, your initial thoughts.
The things that you are sayingare almost always reflective of
your like deeply held beliefs.
And so when we just simply pushthat away, that's our conscious
brain saying like I don't reallywant to believe that, Right.
But, it isn't.
(14:59):
But our, our brain, much likethe rest of our body, is run 95
percent off the subconscious,and so those subtle things that
you are saying are actually thecomputer that's running the show
.
The same way your heart beats,beats without you thinking about
it, the same way that yourlungs breathe without you
thinking about it.
The same way that your lungsbreathe without you thinking
about it, the majority of yourbrain works in that same way,
(15:22):
but we've convinced ourselvesthat our brain is the thing that
we control and everything elsein our body is working on
autopilot.
But every aspect of us isworking on autopilot and our
brain, just like our lungs andour heart, like, can be shifted,
but most often, more often thannot, are simply just moving
(15:42):
through, and so we want tonotice those subtle times where
we say something that's off,that's outside of what we want
to believe, instead of justpushing it away.
Speaker 1 (15:55):
So you, I mean the belief stage.
That's a challenge.
Like that is not a 30 minuteconversation where you just take
it and run with it.
Right, we're done with it.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
I mean I like to.
One of my beliefs is thatchange can be simple, right?
So I try not to believe for me,and I asked my clients not to
believe, that this is going tobe forever.
I'm not a therapist.
I don't want to hold on toclients for a lifetime.
I want to make you know asignificant change in a short
amount of time and then you knowpast that time.
(16:27):
Then they can come back and wedo check-ins.
But this work is really meantfor people to be able to
ultimately learn to do it ontheir own.
And that's where we get to thestep three.
But first I'll talk about steptwo.
Speaker 1 (16:38):
Let's do it.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
Let's do it, which is alignment.
And so alignment is this ideathat whatever you're seeking in
life, you really want tounderstand why you want it.
So oftentimes people think thatthey just want money.
But no one ever just wantsmoney because, like, if you just
wanted money, you put it in thebank.
But what do you actually wantthe money for, right, like, do
(17:00):
you want it for freedom?
Do you want it to travel?
Do you want it to have greaterexperiences?
Do you want to have a legacythat you pass on to your
children?
So you really want to have adepth of understanding of, like,
why you want something.
And then like, oh, when I havethat freedom, when I have those
experiences, what will it giveme?
and we really want to likededuce it to an emotion, like I
(17:23):
think I'll.
I'll feel peaceful when I havemore money, I'll feel happy when
I have more money, I'll feeljoy when I have more money, and
then the work is.
In order to have alignment, youactually need to feel that way
in advance.
So, what we oftentimes believeis that, like, when I get money
I'm going to be so peaceful andexcited, but until I get it I'm
(17:46):
going to worry and be anxiousand like and be fearful that
it's not going to work out, andthen that chasm is too broad and
then there's just too much totraverse.
And so happiness is ourbirthright.
We're meant to be happy themajority of the time, and what
(18:06):
we have found is that societyhasn't actually, like, stayed
with that.
We've come to believe thatthose dense emotions that I
mentioned earlier of worry, fear, anxiety, are normal.
Speaker 1 (18:20):
So we've gotten away from our inalienable rights.
Speaker 2 (18:22):
Exactly right?
In many ways, yes, we haveRight.
And so we want to start tothink like oh, when I am feeling
these dense emotions, it'sreally to tell me that I'm off
track, that I'm not on the rightpath.
The same way, pain comes totell me that like oh, I may need
to see a doctor.
You wouldn't be in pain forlike three weeks and think it
(18:45):
was normal.
But someone will worry about agoal for like weeks and days and
maybe even months on end, andjust be like that's normal, like
if I don't worry, it's notgoing to come to pass.
Speaker 3 (18:54):
Right.
Speaker 2 (18:58):
So we want to start to shift things so that we are
in those high vibration emotionsmore often than not, because
everything, including resources,are attracted to people who are
in those high vibrationemotions.
It actually puts you in, like,as we think about cause I like
to help people ground this inscience and data like it calms
(19:20):
our nervous system, which allowsus to move forward.
Those dense emotions put usinto a state of fight or flight
which is just a survival mode,and so you're not going to move
forward as quickly when we'renot in alignment with what we're
actually seeking.
Speaker 1 (19:36):
Interesting, yeah, and I couldn't agree more.
Like having that alignmentmakes a lot of sense.
So yeah, and why wait?
Speaker 2 (19:45):
And why wait Right and just know that's when the
path gets more and morechallenging, right?
Speaker 1 (19:52):
So you tackle part two, and then where are we at
with part three?
Speaker 2 (19:58):
Yes, and they're not in order, right.
We're doing these all kind oflike synergistically, but the S
is self-awareness, and this iswhat allows you to ultimately do
this work on your own Right.
So so there's three other steps, but self-awareness is kind of
the umbrella over all of them,where you can pick up cues when
you're like, oh, I'm off track,right, when I can easily see for
(20:21):
myself, like when I saysomething out loud, and I'm like
, oh, that's a limiting belief,I want to like work with that
today to help to alchemize it,to help to clear it Right, and
so we really want to be able to,more often than not, catch
ourselves when we're off track,so we don't always have to pay
someone to essentially hold up amirror.
(20:42):
I'm writing a book and my mybook editor says no one wants to
hear that, brandy, but I keepsaying it.
I do believe that everyone hasall the answers.
Like we do go to other peopleand we listen to podcasts, and
it's it's nice to be incommunity with one another.
We're actually meant to otherpeople and we listen to podcasts
, and it's it's nice to be incommunity with one another.
We're actually meant to be inthis lifetime, so you'll always
have other people, but you alsowant to have that like depth of
(21:06):
knowing that you do have allyour own answers and the more
introspective you can be, themore you can catch those little
things.
The more you're going to shiftyour life, the more quickly
you're going to shift your life.
Speaker 1 (21:19):
I see that to be true in working with people and
their financial decisions aswell.
You know some people it's justlike the basic skills that
they're ready to talk about andopen up about, which is, like
you know, having enough money inthe bank and a cash flow that
works positively, and thingslike that.
And of course then there's, youknow, additional degrees of
difficulty, whether it's taxplanning for successful, higher
(21:44):
earning people or retirementplanning, which can be more
complicated.
But then when you get to thepurpose and feelings side of
things, that you know thatdoesn't start off with everyone
right off the bat.
But if you can go there, ifyou're willing to open up about
those types of things andcontemplate them yourself first,
you know I can't, as an advisor, say, oh, let's get, let's dig
(22:07):
deep into purpose and yourfeelings with money right off
the bat, unless you're open toit.
And that is that you know kindof self-diagnosis.
Then that's where you know kindof truly extraordinary legacy
or or goals can can occur andeverybody's not ready for that
all at once, right, no,definitely not Right.
Speaker 2 (22:28):
And and also like we're constantly evolving, Right
.
So.
So sometimes you'll pull back alayer of an onion and you're
like I can like, tackle thisaspect of it now you may not
even know that consciously andand then later you're going to
come back, you know, to peelback another layer, and the
point isn't actually to solve itall right, like that's the
(22:50):
actual human experience.
Is that, or solve it all in onemoment, we solve it over time,
we continue to work with it andthe most important part is that
we just have grace withourselves as we go through the
process.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
Well, I think the process truly like thinking more
about the journey being thedestination.
In essence, like you know, you,instead of being, oh, we need
to end up here and then this youknow having, and I so see that
with your alignment stage right,like you can't be peaceful,
(23:26):
then if you're not peaceful now,thinking through the journey
being, you know, kind of thewhole point, and not waiting to
either live or enjoy or becomfortable.
That's such a big deal and ittakes work, right.
It just doesn't magicallyhappen, day to day, at least for
most of us, plus one, plus onefor that.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
That's so true.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
So true, so we've done number three and this is a
four step process, right yeah?
Speaker 2 (23:54):
So the fourth step tends to have we'll call it the
heaviest lift.
So the fourth step is reallyabout emotional resilience, and
so this is work that normallystarts like with some deep
reflection.
It may include a therapist Like.
It is really about like lookingback over the totality of your
(24:15):
life and and trying tounderstand what events that were
either stressful, littlet-traumatic or big t-traumatic
have occurred in your life thatare causing you to still hold on
to some of those dense emotionsthat we talked about right?
So when we have dense emotionsconnected to a past event, we
(24:36):
normally create patterns that insome way replicate that past
event in our current life.
And so the work that we need todo is to disentangle ourselves
from that stressful and ortraumatic event and keep the
wisdom of it, because no matterhow bad something is that has
happened to us, there's always awisdom that comes from it, and
(25:00):
we hold on to the wisdom and wereally release those dense
emotions.
You don't have to be happy thatit happened to you, but you do
want to be at that place of justlike neutrality right, so this
happened to me.
Neutrality, right so thishappened to me.
For me, I had this kind ofreally triggering encounter, and
(25:24):
any time someone would bring itup I would like find myself
crying about it and I wouldn'twant to talk about it.
And so that's how we know thatwe still haven't gotten to that
place of neutrality.
And now, if someone brings itup, I can have a conversation
about it.
I talk about it matter-of-factly.
It just is like a part of myhistory, but it doesn't define
me, and we let these stressfulor traumatic events begin to
define us when we aren't able tokind of do that work, do that
(25:48):
lift, to disentangle from it.
And so it is in our in serviceto ourselves and to our own good
to really kind of excavatethose happenings, even like
taking a piece of paper andwriting down like these are all
like the things that havehappened to me that I don't love
, and it can be from you know, aphysical, like car accident, to
(26:09):
like something you know, anencounter with another human and
everything kind of in between.
It could be a dog bite, itcould be a parent yelling at you
Everyone's brain interpretskind of stress and it could be a
teacher at a teacher.
One day stand me up in front ofthe room and make me pronounce
a word like 10 times becausethey said I was mispronouncing
it and that was like very like,bothersome to me, like anytime I
(26:32):
was asked, like called in frontof a room for like many, many
years.
I was like what's going tohappen up there?
Right and so, like looking backas an adult, that doesn't seem
so terrible.
But the little girl in me wasstill kind of holding on to the
energy of that moment, and so wejust want to assess those
things and and and start to dothe work.
(26:54):
You won't do it overnight,because you've lived an entire
life, but start to do the workto let those things go.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
I mean, I think you're describing skills that
equal resilience, and whetherit's managing your career,
managing your family, managingyour mindset or your approach to
money, resilience really is theunspoken thing that you need,
how everything is not going toalways go smoothly or as planned
(27:22):
.
There are surprises andopportunities that are positive
as well as traumatic and lossoriented.
But if you can build thatemotional resilience, then you
will be less likely to makedecisions and choices that are,
you know, based on fear andprotecting yourself but that may
derail kind of your long-termprospects.
(27:44):
So I think that is so powerfulto discuss.
Speaker 2 (27:47):
And what we start to see is, the more resilient we
are, the less those events showup in our lives.
So it's a skill set thatactually prepares you to no
longer have to deal with thevery thing you're prepared to
deal with.
So it's like a superpower to beresilient.
(28:08):
It helps you in all the waysand and you know, scientists
aren't sure is it because younow see the world differently or
is it because your experienceis after actually change?
But I don't think it matters.
What I think matters is thatyou're suddenly in this place
where you're feeling as thoughyou're moving through life in a
way that that no longer seemsheavy or seamless, or where
(28:30):
you're not always like watchingout for what might happen yeah,
that, that neuroplasticity, itchanges your brain right To be
more prepared to kind of makedecisions without your caveman,
your inner cave woman, kind ofmaking decisions out of fear.
Yes, our primal brain will kickin.
(28:51):
Yes, and we want to do our verybest to be using, you know, the
foremost portion of our brainas we're navigating life.
It just somehow always turnsout better that way.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
Well, based on this discussion, I know I'm going to
be thinking about this baseframework, the beliefs, the
alignment, theself-acknowledgement, the
self-awareness and emotionalintelligence.
I mean it's so important forall of us.
I love that you're doing thiswork with important leaders,
hopefully changing outcomes formany people.
(29:25):
Can you tell people how theycan find you if they're
interested in learning moreabout the work that you're doing
, brandy?
Speaker 2 (29:31):
Absolutely.
You can find me kind of like onevery single platform at Brandy
, with an I, brandy B, like boyHudson, like the river.
So Brandy B Hudson, that's mywebsite, instagram, youtube,
every platform.
We'll have all that in shownotes, yeah, so I'd love to
connect and you can also emailme at hello at hi Brandy dot com
(29:52):
.
H I Brandy, and I love to hearfrom people with any questions
that you have.
Or, just as I mentioned earlier, build community.
Well, will you rejoin us whenyour book comes out?
I would absolutely love to.
Speaker 1 (30:05):
That would be amazing and for everybody listening.
You know you might put thisepisode on a bookmark and when
you have those days that justyou know the traumatic events of
the past have resurfaced or youknow the traumatic events of
the past have resurfaced or youknow, you just feel that
something is off maybe you canre-listen and remind yourself
about these base skills that canreally help you to live life
(30:29):
with more success, moreresilient success and less
pressure.
I love that, for everybodydeserves that, absolutely.
Thanks for having me today.
Yeah, thanks for joining us,brandy.
Have a great day.
You do the same.
Bye now.
Speaker 3 (30:54):
Thank you for listening to the Women's Money
Wisdom Podcast.
If you found value in thisepisode, the best way that you
can support the podcast is toforward an episode to a friend
or leave a review.
Go to proplancom and thepodcast link to get all the
resources and links mentioned.
This presentation byProPlanning is intended for
general information purposesonly.
(31:14):
No portion of this presentationserves as a receipt of or a
substitute for personalinvestment advice from Pearl
Planning or any other investmentprofessional of your choosing.
Copies of Pearl Planning'scurrent rent and disclosure
brochure and form CRS discussingour advisory services and fees
are available upon request or onour website platform at
(31:35):
pearlplancom are available uponrequest or on our website
platform at pearlplancom.
The information that we shareis meant to educate and inspire,
not serve as personalizedfinancial advice.
Everyone's situation is unique,so be sure to consult with your
own financial professional forguidance that fits your life.
And just so you know, theopinions shared in this podcast
are Melissa's own and those ofher guests.
They don't necessarilyrepresent any organizations with
(31:58):
which Melissa is affiliated.
For more important disclosures,please go to our webpage at
proplancom.
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