Sella Turcica

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
You will be given a test to determine your ability to withstand shock.

(00:04):
What the fuck are you watching?
I mean what was left wasn't even a body.
The most terrifying form of evil is that which lurks within the human mind.

(00:26):
Rated X
Chris
Welcome to what the fuck are you watching?
We're a weekly movie podcast exploring the disturbing, the extreme, and everything in between.
I'm Chris and this is...
Hi, my name's Lisa.
I'm what some people call a sex addict.

(00:48):
It's Lisa.
Hello.
Hi Lisa.
Hi.
How are you Chris?
Um, I'm trying to get my chili up.
I wish I wouldn't have asked.
I don't know.
I don't really know what it is, but I want it.
And we're also joined by...
We feel good about that one.

(01:14):
I don't know.
I've been listening to a lot of Kendrick Lamar and there's a song.
He's like, here, get your chili up.
And I'm like, shit.
Yeah, I guess I do.
Wow.

(01:44):
You made me cry.
Oh, fucking ridiculous.
Leave K-Dot out of this.
Turn the TV off.
Turn the TV.
Yeah, that song.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I know it's...
And then he also says, if you didn't come for the chili, what you come for?

(02:08):
I can kind of relate to that, but I would still like to get my chili up.
Bring it.
Do I have to move past this?
Yeah.
I don't think any of our listeners are really hip hop heads anyway.
That was exactly the trail of thought I just went down.
I was like, should I go in on this?
I was like, do the ghouls and goblins that consume this type of media care?

(02:39):
Surely not.
From what I've seen, they seem to really only be like metalheads, you know?
Yeah, we're in the hard-R demographic, I think.
Which is just and right and where and as it should be.
All right.
Yeah, we'll just leave that.
Oh, man.

(03:01):
A lot of, you know, black metal listeners, shout out to the witch whores of Satan.
Follow them on Instagram.
They do they do rituals to tear apart God's world or something like that.
I need to get my chili up on that, too.
Yeah, she's got to get that chili.

(03:23):
Yeah, this is derailed.
That really took me for a trip.
Every center.
I'm OK.
It's a bow.
That's me.
Hi, Bo.
Hi.
How are you?
I'm well.
How are you, Chris?
Great.
How did he get chili lately?

(03:47):
Well, I've been glad you asked.
Good enough to forget your children's names.
I'm working on it, dude.
Yeah.
That's the bar I'm trying to hit.
Got to get them spices in.
I've been, you know, I've been working on, you know, authentic Mexican chili concha.
Mexican chili con carne.

(04:08):
He has and he does really good.
Yeah.
Not forget your kids names level, but you know, that's a.
We'll get there.
We'll get there.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Turn the TV off.
Turn the TV off.
If there's anyone that listens.
Oh, my God.
If there's anyone that listens to this and gets like all of our references.

(04:34):
There are us.
They yeah, like.
We just reference so much different shit.
If they do, they're like.
Acoustic.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You're fucked, man.
Yeah.

(04:55):
And you're probably old.
Probably.
You're fucked and old.
Probably.
Yeah.
Make sure you stretch before you get up.
Yeah.
Oh, man.
Oh, man.
OK, we got a lot of shit to do today, guys.
So we can get it together.
All right.
Before we get started today.

(05:17):
Big shout out to Channel Underground.
Now, if you haven't heard of Channel Underground, they're playing movies 24 7.
You can just go to Channel Underground dot com.
And watch a movie.
They'll pick the movie for you.
I don't know if you're like Lisa and you sit and scroll Netflix for two and a half hours

(05:40):
and never pick anything and eventually just fall asleep.
Yeah, don't attack us like that.
But you could you could you could just go to Channel Underground.
They pick the movie for you.
And they also have a newsletter.
And in that newsletter, you'll find a little article called Top Six Underground Horror

(06:02):
Podcast that you can't miss.
If you look at that number one slot, you're going to see what the fuck are you watching in it.
Now, I'm not saying these podcasts were ranked, you know, best on top, but I'm going to.
Oh, they were.
And you should take it seriously and you should spend time only on the best.

(06:23):
Yeah, yeah, obviously.
So better luck next time.
Sick on cinema.
Yeah.
Now, those guys are awesome, man.
They know way more about movies than we do.
That's what I was going to say.
That's not what this is about.

(06:45):
Dude, their listeners will be like, what's your what's your favorite Malaysian
tree snake exploitation movie?
And they'll list like fucking 10 of them.
Damn, dude.
I don't know, but I fucked a little Filipino boy that one time.
There's no knowledge coming from this direction.

(07:06):
Yeah, we're lucky to even have you here, Liz.
How are you feeling today?
I feel fine today.
But yeah, check out that article.
I'm going to link it in the show notes.
There's a lot of good podcasts on there.
So if you need something to listen to, check it out.
I would also like to add Kelly's Taboo Terrors to that list, because, you know,

(07:27):
we're always plugging pod mommy around here.
She goes deep and hard at Packard.
Yeah.
And it's also motherfucking male male day at the What the fuck are you watching studio?
Oh, it's what I fucking do now.
Although I need to start saving money because we got to do this.

(07:48):
We got a trip coming up.
This is another package from Psycho Knife.
Full of movies.
Oh, damn.
He wrote us a little note, dude.
Oh, there's glare on it.
Here, I'll read it to you.

(08:08):
Thank you, my shats.
Please sit on my face and send Borthole pics.
I can do those.
Maybe in that order, I don't really know what shats means.
It's a shot that it was a former shot.
It was a it's the ship that already was.

(08:30):
Lily might know Lily.
What's shats mean?
Oh, she's from Singapore.
She's not going to know German.
It is German for treasure.
Learn a language, you idiot.
Treasure.
Oh, nice.
Yeah, I didn't know you were actually asking.
I can try contributing actual information if you'd like.

(08:52):
I need to know, though.
That's what we're after.
Guess we better work on those Borthole pics.
OK, anyway, you think I don't have prepared Borthole pics?
Oh, we need a fresh one.
You can't be busting out freaking old Borthole pics, dude.
That's like.
So you don't want my old boob pics?
As I see, you don't want my old butthole pics?

(09:14):
OK, well, I mean, I guess I guess it's fine.
I don't appreciate the implication that I would post a stale butthole pic.
It's always fresh butthole.
I mean, like, it's got to be like new.
It's got to be a representation of today's butthole.
If you don't do that, you're I mean, it's basically catfishing.

(09:36):
Noodling.
No.
Anyway, we got some movies.
Here's long two.
Hey, nice.
No, according to Psychonaut, there is no long one
and you just got to deal with this.
So that's cool.
OK, got another Sam Hellboy.
Oh, cool.
Piggy Palace.
Piggy Palace.

(09:56):
Yeah, that's going to be a fun one.
It's a great title.
We got things.
Hmm.
It looks like about half the people I fucked in this town.
Cat Sick Blues.
I think this is God damn this fucking glare.
I think this is going to be a good one.
The Green Elephant.
Notably not green.

(10:19):
Yeah.
And a little pinkish.
Yeah, that movie looks fucking rough.
That's crazy.
And this one's for you, Slayer of Geese.
Or is or or or God damn it.
Or is or ask, go the or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or.

(10:39):
Orosco, Orosco, the embalmer, the embalmer guy.
Yeah.
Oh, he embalms people.
Yeah, I think this is like legit, like actually embalming people.
Oh, shit.
Oh, cool.
Well, I think it's cool that we're going to watch a movie about embalming

(11:00):
because I just finished the Butterfly Garden.
Oh, yeah.
And yeah, he embalms the girls, you know, to preserve them.
Well, when we get to Slayer of Geese's Listen and Request episode,
that's what we're doing.
So you got about six weeks.
Oh, I thought that was like soon.
So I was like, oh, that's cool.
I just finished a book about embalming.

(11:22):
I won't remember that I've read that book in six weeks.
I have an indelible mark that one.
No, I mean, I'll probably remember.
She's got severe short term memory loss.
I don't know where I'm going.
Oh, we got a comment.

(11:43):
I got a comment for you guys.
Oh, shit.
On our I Drink Your Blood episode on Spotify, one's from Jose.
Says, love this flick, watch the uncut X rated.
It's way better.
Yeah, I don't think I believe you, Jose.
Yeah, we weren't prepared, though.

(12:04):
We didn't realize it wasn't going to be the right one.
Yeah, it might be a little better and it is a little shorter,
which by definition is a little better.
Yeah.
Isn't that what isn't that that film?
Yeah, that's the hippies.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Satanic hippies that I was thinking about for weeks.

(12:25):
Now, I don't remember why I do have that.
I do have I do have that movie coming.
Grindhouse had a freaking like half off sale on it.
It's probably not active by the time this podcast goes live,
but I got it real cheap.
The X rated version.

(12:46):
It's also a double feature with each year scan or whatever.
I think it's probably too early to do like a revisited episode.
Yeah, now it's the revisit definitely has to wait till we clear some of the.
Yeah, we got some of the other stuff we have backlog.
We'll probably save it.
Oh, yeah.

(13:07):
Yeah.
OK.
Yeah, because then I have to be able to smoke weed before then again, too.
Because this is our pick and then next week we'll do a recommendation.
Yes.
OK.
This is our pick.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
I was.
Yeah, I was.
I forgot.
It's a surprise for Lisa.

(13:29):
I was glad.
I was glad when I listened to the episode and learned that we were going to be doing
a Fred Vogel movie.
It seemed like his turn.
Yeah, definitely.
I was like, oh, cool, Fred Vogel tonight.
Shout out to Manchester's fucking killing it again.

(13:52):
San Antonio, Garden Grove, Newcastle, Traverse City, Rancho Cucamonga.
I think I know who that is.
And a special shout out to S. Chafenberg.
Should have used that chapstick.

(14:12):
It helps.
Whoa, Lisa, what the fuck are you watching?
Well, I am excited.
OK.
That we are watching.
We're watching Selatursica from I don't know what year.
2010.
But it's by Fred Vogel.
Yeah.

(14:33):
And we really liked his movies.
We sure did.
I'm excited about that.
Hopefully it's going to be good.
You might be wondering what the heck is the Selatursica?
I'll tell you.
It's Latin for Turkish saddle.

(14:55):
It's a cradle for your pituitary gland.
Yeah, bitch.
I don't know how anybody would know about that unless you're really into bones or puberty.
I'm not into either of those things.
The pituitary gland kind of looks like a little brain nut sack in case you were wondering.
OK.

(15:16):
And the Selatursica cradles that little brain nut sack
like a pair of perfect fitting boxer briefs.
OK.
Selatursica is directed by Fred Vogel.
Written by Don Moore, Fred Vogel, and Shelby Vogel.

(15:37):
Starring Camille Keaton of I Spit on Your Grave fame.
Damien Amarouskeq, Harvey Daniels, Ali Nicol, Sean P. McCarthy, Sarah Thornton, Fred Vogel,
Joe Cruz, Scarlett McCarthy, Fulci, the fuck, and Jade Risser.

(16:02):
Special effects, of course, Jeremy Cruz, Shelby Vogel, Autumn Cook, Sean Collins,
times two, and Sean Diddy Combs, and Brad Bianchi.
As Lisa said, this one's from 2010, or as I said, I think she didn't know.
So I didn't even know what the fuck we were watching until earlier today.

(16:24):
All right. Now, this one's a little a little higher up there in the timeline of Fred Vogel's
filmography. I kind of wanted to do things in chronological order, but we kind of just
fell into Selatursica. This is one of his later entries with his most recent thing being

(16:47):
2018. As I'm sure everybody knows, Fred Vogel has directed the August Underground trilogy,
which we have covered, and I think we all liked and we've been wanting to do more Fred Vogel movies.
Just a little storyline for you straight off the back of the motherfucking box.

(17:08):
Sergeant Bradley Robeck returns home after a mysterious accident leaves him paralyzed.
Upon Brad's return, his family remains unaware of the details of the accident and severity of his
condition. As hours pass, Brad's health terribly worsens, barreling down to a gruesome conclusion

(17:30):
that will change the family forever.
Sam, gender reassignment. Here's a fun fact for you. This is Camille Keaton's first role in 17 years.
Holy shit, that's a fun fact.

(17:51):
All right. Now, I am, you know, a little sensitive. I'm a sensitive boy. I can't watch.
Movies like this, I get scared. So I always like to come to the IMDB parents guide to make sure I
can handle. Sex and nudity has been rated moderate. One sex scene with some mild thrusting.

(18:14):
Nothing too graphic. Violence and gore has been rated severe. There isn't much violence.
OK, there's more. There's more, though. OK, we can end there.
There isn't much violence, but when there is violence, it is very gory. Right. OK.

(18:37):
A man has his jaw ripped almost completely off.
His tongue is shown moving out of the hole. Yeah, that's going to that's going to be bad.
Was it? You're going to hate that, Chris.

(18:58):
Was it for blow jobs? Hell, yeah.
A girl is decapitated. What is it?
A girl is decapitated. Lots of blood spray. A brief shot of a wound on a man's foot.
A sticky substance comes out of a man's ear.

(19:25):
Now I thought we were headed. Yeah. Where else can you go?
Paint me into a corner here. Oh, yes. The year come.
Yeah. A man shits himself.
Profanity hasn't been rated.

(19:46):
A few F words and a handful of milder swears. OK, such as bugger.
Yeah, it's got to be bugger. Yeah.
Alcohol, drugs and smoking is also unrated. Two men smoke weed. Frightening and intense scenes
has been rated severe. The last 10 to 15 minutes of this film are very intense.

(20:08):
All right. I think it's going to get wild, guys. You ready for some cella tersica?
I'm so ready. Yeah. Crack this open. Oh, yeah.
Smell it. Smells like Psychonaut's house. Not that I would know what this house smells like.

(20:30):
Clarify that. Yeah, that was weird. I know.
That was weird. It's musty.
Smells like boar tolls. Yeah. And lube. Baby oil.
And it's silly. It's silly.
How many bottles of baby oil you got in your house?

(20:54):
I can't open any of the doorknobs.
Let me get that. Oh, yeah.
Oh, is it movie we watched for the disney? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Oh, my God. That was life in the hole, wasn't it?
Yeah, it was. Oh, yeah.
The freaking security guard guy that was there. Whatever the fuck he was.

(21:19):
What an irredeemable sack of shit that entire film was.
Yeah. Popping it in the Blu Ray player.
Yeah. Stick it in, daddy. Yeah. Thanks for letting us.
Teasing it. Yeah. Pulling it back out.
Oh, halfway. Yeah. Yeah.
Push it in halfway. Yeah. Yeah. I think my Blu Ray player is nutting right now.

(21:44):
It's freaking out.
We'll break it before we start. Yeah.
That's what I was going to say. Snap the fucking tray up.
Does it have a trade? This is a trade situation.
Yeah, it's like a yeah, like a PS2.
Yeah. Old PS2, not a PS2 sling.

(22:06):
I never had a slim. I had that one fat boy and it lasted forever.
You know, we we front as a movie podcast, but we're really just a video game podcast.
That's what I was about to say. I'm going to try to keep you guys on track
with the movie tonight and not the video games.
Lisa, if you do that, don't stifle our creativity.

(22:29):
This is going to be a fucking PTSD movie.
Yeah. Yeah. When you read that little quote that was like the war's over for him,
but it's just starting for his family.
I was going to make a joke that that's how it always is with soldiers when they come back.
Well, the popular is very regarding dreams in general is that they're entirely related to
production of your pituitary gland.

(22:50):
So my guess would be that it's going to be something along those lines.
Yeah. Are we going to get some sick pituitary gland stories?
Pituitary. I don't think I've ever seen a pituitary gland movie.
Oh, God. Pituitary.

(23:16):
Show me your pituitary.
Checking out the special features right now.
We got some deleted scenes.
That's just me when I wake up in the morning.
Yeah. Pretty aggressive.
And we could check out some deleted scenes if we have time.
We won't. We won't.
We won't.
This is Selatersica from 2010.

(23:38):
Let's watch this movie.
Motherfucking toe tag.
I think things go a lot better when we just have the fucking movie.
Hey, look at that dog.
Man, you know, fucking dog, man.

(24:01):
I'm down for like a split custody situation with a dog.
We should do that, man.
We should.
Yeah.
You want to have a split custody?
Yeah. I'm not even like really joking.
I'm cool with that.
I'm cool with having a dog part time.

(24:22):
Oh, my God.
I don't know if I could just do part time, though.
I'd want to.
I'd want the dog full time.
Well, no, this would actually be perfect.
Listen, because you guys could have it in the evenings.
And I could have it in the day, like in the morning.
OK.
You could drop it off on your way to work.
Yeah.
OK.
If you hang out with me, we could drop it off when we're done at work

(24:44):
or when on our way to work, we'll drop it.
I'm not hating that idea, man.
That could work for me.
Are we about to become dog dads?
I'm fine with that.
Is there already blood on those cabinets?
Maybe.
Or like the hinges of the cabinets or something.

(25:08):
For being here, it's been nice having you around.
Like we need a little volume.
We do.
I don't know if I can say the same for that husband of yours.
She has a straight.
Yeah, fuck those husbands.
He's been spending so much time at the shop.
He's making a ton of money, though.
If he keeps going at this rate, I should be able to quit my stupid job soon.

(25:29):
Is she a hairdresser?
Looks like it, huh?
Uh, yeah.

(26:03):
The sun? Definitely not.
I thought that those were lesbians.
Yeah, I thought it was lesbians, too.
For sure.
It is! What the fuck is going on?
Oh, it's one of those situations.

(26:24):
I'm not against chopsticks in the hair.

(26:44):
This girl right here is very 2010.
I want to try to do better with the names, but it's not going to happen.
It's never going to happen for me.
Ironically, she looks like someone that belongs on a porn couch surrounded by black guys.

(27:14):
But you see how...
That's the one we should be concerned about.
That's definitely the one to be concerned about.
I don't fit into conventions of haircuts and shit, dude.

(27:36):
It looks like extensions have been glued to his bald scalp, like,
desperately and unrelated to each other.
And these mutton chops that are graying.
It's not a phase, mom.
It's not. This is him.

(28:02):
The shoes? We think the shoes are the problem?
Oh, in the home. Okay.
It takes a bold man to have a big head and still put a fedora on it.
Yeah, fedora is always a choice.
The joys are fine sometimes. It's got to be...

(28:26):
They should have one size up.
Yeah. Yeah.
Then it would be fine.
Oh, man. Look at this van pulling up.
Yeah, I heard a snare drum.
That's got to be Brad, right?
Is this snare drum because of military?
Yeah, it's got to be.

(28:48):
Didn't go well.
There he is.
There he is.
It's bad time.
The war's just starting.
They got to help you go to the bathroom.
Thor.
Is he a fucking MP?
I didn't see the arm in.
Yep.
Oh, yep.

(29:08):
He deserved it.
Yeah.
God damn it.
Brad.
He's home.
His family's been waiting on him.
They're fucking hiding inside.
Yeah, I know.
They're all just like watching the guy push him up in a wheelchair.
So far, what I've seen from the Army ACUs, they seem to be on point, though.

(29:30):
That flag you see he's wearing.
That is what you wear on deployments.
Yeah.
Black and white one.
Yep.
Don't wear the colored flag.
No colored flags allowed in a war zone.
Yeah.
God damn that motherfucker's head.

(29:51):
I know.
It's so crazy.
I don't know how long Brad's been in the Army.
I'd like to find out because his unit patch is not matching his combat patch.
Well, you know, Chris, it's not going to be exactly right,

(30:12):
but I think they did a really good job with the ACUs.
He also has a combat action patch on,
which obviously he got fucking wrecked, so I think he might deserve one.
Is he hot?
Brad?
I don't know.
I think he could be.

(30:33):
He looks like a fucking zombie.
Okay.
He could be if he didn't look like he's dying.
He's definitely not like actively hot.
I think at one point in his life, he was hot though.
Yeah.

(30:57):
I'm not going to do that.
It's good to finally get that ass won't shut up about.
That's what he fucking said to him.
I'm not calling you Gazm.
Yeah.
No.
You could call me Gazm.
No, the fuck I can't.
Okay.
He's a DJ.
Makes music or whatever.

(31:18):
If you show up in my own home, hand me a goddamn mixtape.
It's the Gazm mix.
I'm coming out of the chair.

(31:41):
Notice how she said,
Yeah.
Why does he look like this?
Well, not a lot of sun in Iraq.
Oh yeah.
You know.

(32:01):
Oh, that's Fulci.
Oh God.
Whoa.
I seen his fucking dick.
I feel so bad for Pugs.
You're just struggling to breathe.

(32:25):
Damn it, Gazm.
It'll smell like this.
Oh, she said that's how the other one broke.
I fucking get it, man.
I tell my kids the same shit.
I do remember that being an issue.
Like my grandmother was, get off the arm.
Get off the arm is good.
Mm-hmm.

(32:48):
Settled in upstairs?
Yeah.
Is that the move?
They're gonna get one of those lifts installed.
I don't know, man.
It seems like a lot of extra work.
Mom just put him in the creepiest room in the house.
It's half wood grain, half brick wall.

(33:12):
Well, you know, she's working with what she's got.
He's in a fucking wheelchair.
He can't go upstairs.
Man, he is a ghoul.
Yeah.

(33:46):
Are these people saying words right?
Not in a way that I appreciate.
I don't know, because I've had a few beers.
And I think my hearing is starting to go out.
I swear he just says, it's very strange.

(34:06):
He did kind of though.
Look, he was giving his mom was super creepy.
That's just his face though, I think.
I think he's a creepy guy.
Yeah, dude, I would quarantine his ass in a second, man.
He's a zombie.
He's literally a zombie.

(34:29):
Give him a room with a window.
Give this man some fucking light in his life.
Yeah, dude, just take all the pills.
Yeah, you might as well just stand there.
Why did they put the foundation on top of the eyebrows?

(34:53):
Well, who's in charge here?
I have questions, comments, and concerns.
Well, yeah, there was crazy shit everywhere.
Really?
Yeah, the creatures were crazy.

(35:16):
The creatures were crazy.
The shit you couldn't even imagine.
I had to check my boots every time I put them on.
Every time.
You don't care.
Next thing something bites you, and it's bye-bye foot.
Did you check your boots every time, Chris?
Nope, I was just hoping to get fucking good.
Shit.
God.
It takes like five.
Looks like a guy sent this one out, boys.

(35:42):
It was pretty scary around here after they told us you were missing.
Prayed for you every day.
Yeah, I told her she had to keep her faith.
I'm pretty sure you did your fair share of praying over there, too, huh?
I had the dark lord.
Just another atheist in the fox.
Yep, yep.
I was waiting for the joke.

(36:05):
I thought he was going to say dick.
Show me your dick, sis.
Show me your dick.
God damn it.
I don't want the...
Get the fag off the screen.
I'm not watching that.

(36:29):
If you ever wanted to know what hanging out with my family is like, it's sad.
Well, the mom earlier said you know how your brother is with you,
so I think he just torments all her boyfriends.
Surely.
So you're going to show me your dance or what?
Yeah, baby, you really should.

(36:49):
No, I'm not prepared.
Man, wait until you see the story grander than everything.
Come on, it's a hell of a dance and we're all family here.
Ew.
You don't even have a pole.
Right here.
There's plenty room now.
It's work for your brother.

(37:18):
Pretty sure I see the point that started exactly like this.
Absolutely, you did.
As have I.
Haunted horse.
Why were we so into that for so long?
Yeah.

(37:39):
Oh no.
Precious moments.
There's not a goddamn precious thing about this.
Yeah, dude, that's just scary, man.
I like how people take them and repaint them.
Yeah, that's like those are like types of content I can watch people do,
but I could never actually engage in myself.
Yeah.

(37:59):
I don't know what the props I did when I won and.
That's my nickname.
Well, you'll see.
I want to tell you right now.
I was gonna say, what if the whole pussy's out?
No, she's just throwing rose petals.
I did this to Chris the other day when he came home.
Yeah.
I walked outside and threw rose petals at him.

(38:21):
I squeed.
Will you do an interpretive dance next time you do it?
No.
I need you to.
And I also need, uh, Quentin Isabella to video it for me.

(38:46):
Yeah, dude, I got the.
No, I don't want to watch.
I don't.
Excuse me.
Why are we doing?
You got what?
You know how you go, um, get so excited.
You got like run.
Yeah, that happened to me.
The same thing happened to me when we, uh, got the number one slot on channel underground.

(39:10):
You know, I just had to run around the room.
Yeah, got the zoomies, man.
That's what happened when I threw rose petals at you.
Yeah, I just start running.
I was just so excited.
Jack Jacket says I got him roses on Valentine's day too.
He does a little squeal thing.

(39:36):
Well, you've seen.
Oh, fucking gay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, it was.
It was the roses that Chris had got me a couple of weeks ago or whatever, and they were starting
to die and I took all the rose petals and waited for him to come home and walked out

(39:57):
and threw them.
Apparently my cat likes to eat roses.
I don't know what she's got going on.
Oh, yeah.
But I watched her bet that the whole bed off the line and she was just like munching on it.
Oh my God.
Yeah, I guess we're doing that for a while.
And Lisa was like, these flowers are poisonous to carrots.

(40:20):
Lily's are poisonous to cats.
And that's why I used to not want them because my cats would eat them.
But now they leave my flowers alone.
I've never seen her do that to another plant so far in her life.
It was, I don't know.
Like a rose thing.
I don't know.
Ours likes to eat tape.
Oh, man, Brad heard that whistle and now he's got a headache.

(40:43):
Yeah, he just started freaking out.
His head hurts real bad, apparently.
Scooting away after his sister did such a provocative dance.
Yeah, you wanted that dance so bad.
Now look at you.
Oh, is this the ear jizz scene?
Oh, no, sticky substance coming out of his ear.

(41:10):
Motor oil.
Yeah.
Is my dancing that bad?
You're the one.
Portrait's the worst.
You have nothing to be sorry for.
Yeah, there's something wrong with that jaw.
I'm sorry I left.
I had to get out of there.
I felt like my head was going to explode.

(41:30):
Is there anything I can do?
I can tell from the neck down he's banging.
I'm catching headaches up upstairs.
Oh, yeah, probably.
Thank you, though.
Yeah, I think he's a good looking dude if you take the fucking zombie makeup off of him.
I loved it.
He also might have AIDS.
Man, I hope you get some serious cash for all this.
I heard AIDS is pretty bad.
No, no.

(41:52):
This is what they look like.
Yeah.
How'd that happen anyway?
I don't think Brad wants to talk about that right now.
That guy's got AIDS, too.
I'm just saying.
That guy is a...
That's why I invest in everything.
Job is scarce nowadays.
Especially when you're...
What?

(42:12):
When I'm what?
That's what's going on with the DJ now.
White?
While I'm young.
That's what I'm not sure you know of, baby.
I'm the DJ.
I control the crowd.
Get them hype.
It's better than drawing cartoons on people.
My art is forever.
Until they die.
Ha ha!
Brad, I'm got me.
Okay, pop, please start.
Get your chili up.
What two rivers run down...

(42:32):
He's so...
I'm fucking sick of you.
I'm so bad.
I'm so bad.
I'm so bad.
I'm so bad.
I'm so bad.
I'm so bad.
I knew it was gonna be a thing all night.
I'm so bad.
I'm so bad.
It's cool, man.
It's cool.
I wasn't like this.
It's cool, man.
It's cool.
I wasn't like this.
I'm so bad.
I'm so bad.
I'm so bad.
Everybody knows that shit.
I'm so bad.
I'm so bad.
I'm so bad.
God, his fucking hair. I can't do that.

(42:57):
Yeah.
I've been there.
Oh, on this day.
Oh, is his nonconformity bothering you, Bo?
It is.
It sure is.
He doesn't fit into the conventions of society, man.
He's entitled to that haircut,
and I'm entitled to tell him it's fucking stupid.

(43:19):
Yeah, exactly.
Did you ever shut up? Were you even listening to yourself?
Wait, Summer, I always listen to myself and everyone else.
The patchy color job isn't what it's getting me.
It's that strange rat tail right above his right ear.
Because it's completely bald and immediately around it.
Yeah, there's just some weird shit going on.
I hate that.

(43:43):
Yeah, he's mad that she doesn't want to go see him play a show
because her brother's there.
And your name is Gasm, and you downloaded your playlist off of Limewire.
You're not a DJ.
So this is...
Oh, they're about to smoke some spliffs.

(44:05):
This guy is his brother, not that one girl's husband.
I don't know who any of these people are.
Yeah, because at first I thought that was that girl's husband,
but I think it's their brother.
Their brother.
One girl's husband.
That other...
Oh, they're lesbian?
Oh, fuck it.
No.

(44:27):
Are they them?
No.
I don't know.
It all just goes one ear and out the other.
I don't know who any of these people are.
I know. I don't know their names.
Tell me their names fucking 30 times and I wouldn't get it.
Look at that fucking ear.
I know, but there was a girl that had tattoos and stuff too,

(44:49):
and the mom was talking shit about her husband.
And I thought this was her husband.
But I don't think they are.
I think this is her brother.
I think he is the brother, and I think that chick is just his girl.

(45:10):
Yeah, I think you're right.
Maybe.
Synthetic herb.
What is that, like K2?
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Is that what he's talking about?

(45:33):
I've never had K2, so I don't know.
I didn't miss much.
Yeah, I know.
I don't want to.
All right, MP.
Goddamn, calm down, bet.

(45:54):
Don't get hard in your chair over there.
Goddamn it.
I know you're thinking we got it all wrong.
I hate to say it, but you look like shit.
About time somebody fucking said it.
Yeah, come on now.
It's coming from that guy.

(46:15):
I have a problem with the rat tail and the earlobe, but that guy's hot.
It's crazy.
Yeah.
I've done all these tests.
You know, if you.
To really makes me angry.
I don't know.
It's not it's not.
So what happened?
It's not healthy that it's.
So whenever they lost all combo with the convoy, they knew something was up.

(46:38):
They traced the last GPS location when they found it.
They said, hey, why are the MPs out there?
No blood, just the equipment and the guns untouched.
And when they got there and they found the equipment untouched, they knew something was up.
I mean, soldiers don't just abandon government equipment.
Who would burn it before leaving?
I did it all the time, motherfucker.

(47:03):
Too much DMT in the desert.
You activated your pituitary gland.
I thought it right around.
Because.
You and the boys are playing pituitary in the desert.
I heard all these noises around me and I opened my eyes, but.
Everything was all fucked up.

(47:23):
I could only see in black and white.
And I tried to get out of bed, but of course.
It my prostate.
Don't tell you about the G spot is I can't walk no more.
Fuck my eyes up, can't see colors.
Man, I'm not a walker.
See the same again.
Plus, I get confused once I start talking medical mumbo jumbo.

(47:46):
But I can tell they have no clue what happened to us.
Every guy that was in my squad has something wrong with him.
I got thin lips.
His eyesight.
Thin villainous lips.
What's the problem?
They didn't say.
They give us all psych evaluations, prescribed medication.

(48:07):
Once the test results came back in.
No, he does have a strange relationship with English.
The alien evaluation.
I'm scared.
I don't know what's going on inside.

(48:28):
That guy's name is Bruce.
You couldn't.
There's no way.
There's no.
I can't blame you, bro.
I mean, it seems like you're still in a lot of pain.
I feel pretty numb most of the time.
They got me a lot of meds.
If I could in value methadone.
These guys get it in value.

(48:49):
Oh, yeah.
Sign me up.
A little hole in my skull right here.
I don't feel anything.
His doctor said the same thing.
Hopefully, Dr. Birkin, see what's going on.
I have an appointment with her on Monday.

(49:11):
Why is she?
Vacuum like that.
That was psycho.
Best act she's done in the smooth.
Squared up.
I'm like fighting a dog.
And why is she doing the same three splines?

(49:37):
You know, I'm not about signing up.
If I don't make the.
Yeah, but you did.
Yeah.
I want to be a hero like you.
Hell, yeah.
That's what you got to look forward to.
You said I'm a hero.

(50:01):
Napkin on the tongue.
Yeah, I don't know what that was.
He ate, but he did not like it.
It didn't go well.
What is this?
Just fire.
He said you want to be like me.
She's like, yeah, I did five minutes ago.
I did before this shit.
I watched you wipe your tongue with a napkin.

(50:23):
It's weird.
Brad.
Google.
You wait.
They might be.
He's like, what's wrong with me?
I'm a goddamn hero, bitch.
God damn bitch.
He is.
We got to get him a chin.
I don't know.
Something strange is happening.
Yeah, he's got some of that.

(50:44):
Harlem Williams syndrome.
Yeah, I wish you would leave.
You're ruining this for me.
Ruining this for you.
How you're being an asshole.
Why doesn't he leave and go to his fucking show?
Man, I think he's only fucking normal in here.

(51:06):
I'm going to be pretty far away.
The guy called Gazzam.
Oh, yeah, he is called Gazzam.
That's an issue.
But I mean, he's only been here for a few hours and we're already fighting.
We fight all the time.
Besides, I'm not fighting.

(51:28):
Yes, you are.
OK, now let's kiss.
Ain't that easy, Brit?
You're gonna walk in on us or anything.
Oh, man.
Walking in on us.
Yeah, they keep doing it.
It's not like you have to worry about your brother walking in on us or anything.

(51:48):
At least he made a good joke.
She made a curse.
It was bad.
She's like, my dancing's so bad, you had to run away.
Yeah.
You introduced yourself as Gazzam.
I should sail, bucko.

(52:09):
Yeah, dude, you can't drop Gazzam like minute one, dude.
Honey, no.
And a mixtape.
Why does it say Daddy Longleg up there?
I was wondering about that.
It's like a license plate that she has that says Daddy Longleg.

(52:34):
Oh.
Yeah, you did.
It went too far, Gazzam.
Yeah.
Yeah.
A lot of Gazzam, no ore.
Yeah.
I was stuck up for you earlier, too, Gazzam.

(52:55):
I'm a little disappointed in you.
I don't know.
It doesn't sound like a bad idea at all.
Yeah, son.
Fucking three foot goddamn crucifix.
I don't know.
That is a.
Yeah, freaking huge.
Jesus.
You better put that on a stud.
And everyone seems to be ignoring it.

(53:22):
No, he seems really, really sick.
You ever seen the walking dead?
Just tell her that.
Yeah, his skin is both color and consistency of tissue.
Toilet tissue.
Does she say mom?
I don't know.
I think this isn't a sister.
This is like a friend or something.

(53:45):
Yeah, I thought they called him Richard.
I did, too.
Well, they said Richard and her and then they pan to them.
But I think this is Richard.
I thought this was Brad.
I don't know who the fuck Richard is.
Richard said.
Richard must be the dad.
No, that girl is Heidi.
Chris.
Oh, really?
This is Bruce.
Yeah.

(54:07):
Yeah, I knew that.
I don't know the blonde girl's name.
Oh, my God.
We're the movie.
We're a good movie.
I guess I can't even successfully watch.
We're cut.
Yeah.

(54:32):
He just got home.
This is a product of the time that.
Yeah, she's hot, man.
She's like the only good looking one here.
No, I agree.
It's not.
I know it's the hair thing again, though.
Yeah, fucking Bruce got a hold of her.
I'm telling you.
I already know.

(54:55):
Bruce, can you take Heidi home, please?
Yeah, I need to get out of here for a minute.
I'm going to do it.
I'm going to look like this guy, though.
Yeah.
I would love to see it.
It's going to turn out for me.
Everything's going to be OK, sweetie.
I'm going for this girl.
That's what I'm saying.
I'm going for this look.

(55:16):
It's going to turn out like that, though.
I'm having you forcibly removed from the home.
I can't come over and see you.
You have your hair cut to the top here.
I'm going to do my hair cut.
It's that grab your candle.

(55:43):
That pug.
Pugs are so pitiful.
But I love him.
I read a thing, though.
There's a guy who's like reverse engineering
some of the terrible genetic traits we've read.
Oh, really?
Certain bugs to have.
Yeah.
Pugs are on the list.
Pugs.
Yeah, I just love all dogs, I think.
I like love them so much.
I think any dog I see, I'm like, aw, I love that dog.

(56:07):
Pugs make me sad, though.
I feel sad for the pug.
Yeah, I know.
Yeah, when you hear him struggling to breathe.
Yeah.
I got gist coming out my ear.
God damn, it won't stop.
Black gist.
He looks weak.

(56:27):
I think he looks a lot better than I expected.
Joaquin Phoenix.
I can tell he's in pain and that this is tearing him up inside.
Also, did you watch him try to eat that tomato?

(56:47):
Yeah, man, I swear it was a fucking tomato, wasn't it?
I don't know, but that's what it looked like when it came back out.
Dude, he's fucking Joaquin Phoenix with his nose chopped off.
Yeah, he does have a Joaquin look.
Shout out to Wolverines.
Joaquin Phoenix and Joaquin and his brother are fucking hot.

(57:10):
Yeah.
I don't think he's going back.
Go back?
Honey, for what?
I think you know how this works.
Like all three of us are like, what?
I got a feeling.
Oh, they said, oh.

(57:31):
It's that trinch foot.
Oh, I don't like that.
God damn.
My finger was looking like that for a minute.
It's feeling pretty good now.
I haven't updated you, but it's healing up nicely.
That's good.
No more for heat incidents.

(57:52):
No.
I want to be honest.
I don't know if that little bit of cream helped.
Yeah, took the bandage off, put a tiny bit of cream on there.
In one spot.
Run in the open gas pit too.
Yeah, and then fucking put back in the boot.

(58:15):
Somebody didn't take a combat lifesaver's course.
Probably because.
You're a fucking MP.
Yeah, dude, why is he just wearing his fucking uniform and his boots all the time?
Yeah, he gets his man some clothes.
How will we know he's the soldier if he's not in the fucking.
Well, the fact that he looks like a fucking zombie.

(58:37):
That is her husband, so I guess she's not a daughter.
Yeah, I think she's like just the daughter-in-law.
OK.
Just so crazy around here, like I don't even know where to start.
Well, with a buzz trimmer.
I'm so proud of you.
The way you've handled the situation has just been amazing.
One of these girls is named Richard, I swear.
I think they were referencing the dad and the way the camera pan to them was just absurd.

(59:06):
Let's get this burlap necklace off his fucking neck.
He already had it.
So he already had one and then she put another one on her way in him down.
There is already fucking.
We.
I got boys over there and they say all they do is play video games and masturbate.
Oh, yeah.

(59:29):
Is he talking about my home?
Story of my life.
I tried to buy a smoking monkey.
I'll show you pictures and video later when I'm done unpacking.
Do you want to scoop or is it too much for your lactose?
What?

(59:51):
Do you want to scoop or is it too much for your lactose?
See, I always had fireball.
I think there.
I would run low.
I would have Ashley give them to me.
I would have a bunch of mumblers in this family.

(01:00:13):
So you gave them fucking fireballs.
Hey, you guys have never had candy before.
Let me give you fucking fireballs.
I'm ironically, they probably fucking love them.
Probably candy, though.
I fucking.
Yeah, no.
I mean, I don't know.
I don't even know what candy is.

(01:00:35):
They hang butchered pigs on mudslabs.
That was like one of the prime currencies still when I went to jail last time.
And you start getting fireballs too.
I gave this dude a Newport one time.
Yeah.
Knocked him on his ass, dude.
They smoke shit.
After a while.

(01:00:55):
Yeah, dude.
You can knock the fuck out by having the next one.
Yeah, dude.
Shitty fucking Iraq cigarettes compared to a Newport.
I could almost kill that guy, dude.
He just gave me the thumbs up while he's coughing his fucking lungs out.
He's like, yeah.

(01:01:17):
You know what, babe?
Maybe I will have some ice cream.
Get it yourself.
Hopefully, my lactose will get me the fuck out of here.
Oh, he's the one that's going to shit his pants because of that ice cream.

(01:01:37):
It is AIDS.
It is AIDS.
I heard this story before.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You fucked that monkey.
I guess they would have shit if they would have saw a monkey.
Completely illegal.
Purchase a monkey.
Yeah, look at that.
Yeah, he's shitting.

(01:01:58):
We're filming a monkey and it has a cigarette.
How is he still telling this story?
We've been here a long time.
Right?
Picked up the habit.
But he's just awkwardly listening.
Watching what other people were doing.
That's how I learned to smoke.

(01:02:20):
From a monkey.
Nice story, Baltimore.
He said that's how the monkey learned to smoke.
I thought he said that's how I learned to smoke.
That's how he learned to smoke, I'm pretty sure is what he said.
Brad.
Gavin, don't feed food to chocolate.
Well, he was begging.
Brad.

(01:02:41):
Whoa.
Sweetie.
You don't get Brad chocolate either.
Now's a good time to shit your pants, Gazm.
Get out of there, Gazm.
I'm sorry.
I need to be excused.
Yeah.

(01:03:01):
I think Seth's here.
I'm just tired.
I'm sick of that.
We all are.
That story was very long and had no point.
I still haven't changed out of my uniform.
Also, I've been in these clothes for nine months.
These boots, the smell.
Have you seen my feet?

(01:03:21):
I need to hear them out, man.
I'm a little freaked out.
He's not looking that good.
Have these people ever interacted with other people in real life?
Listen, I was just thinking, like, how are they not like maybe we should take him to
the hospital or something?
Like, obviously something's going on with this guy.

(01:03:45):
Yeah, I think the majority of this family is just kind of ignoring his problem.
Anyone that color should be.
Yeah.
Put down.
Yeah, man.
He's doesn't look good.
They're one of the families that thinks that the army has good doctors.

(01:04:13):
Those exist, don't they?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, they do.
Must be the first enlisted family member, I guess.
I don't know.
Old backyard wrestling.
Hell yeah.

(01:04:34):
You know what'll cheer me up?
Visual reminders of my legs working.
I remember when my legs worked.
I remember when I had a cock.
Brad's got a case of the tinnitus.
He's got to take those fucking burlap strings off of his neck.

(01:04:57):
Yeah, how many necklaces could you wear, dude?
Well, that sister keeps making freaking necklaces and putting them on him.
He just keeps wearing them.
It's a very ripe banana.
Yeah.
And I know we could fuck if I put a pillow over the face.
I mean, if he was like normal colored.

(01:05:19):
Oh, yeah.
Him eating that banana.
That's got to be hot, right?
If he was a normal color.
No, it was.
No, no, no, no.
That's what does it for me.
Yeah.
It's better than the tomato.

(01:05:41):
I want to be Brad to freak out and fucking kill everybody in this family soon.
Everyone here deserves to die.
Man, I can't believe Gassim left without shit in his pants.
I was sure it was going to be him.
Yeah, dude.
Oh, oh, he's back.
Oh, there's still a chance.

(01:06:01):
There's still a chance.
So Brad just woke up and his foot's all uncovered.
Yeah.
It's that gaping in the wind.
Yeah.
It's kind of gross looking.
Yeah, you need to probably not think some error, dude.

(01:06:22):
Not any more gross than whatever was going on there, I guess.
An interracial couple, Lisa?
No, just the way they're moving.
Oh, it's Brad that shit his pants.
We should have known.
I don't think that color.
Yeah, I don't really think that shit.
He hasn't eaten in days.

(01:06:42):
That's something dark sighted.
It's whatever the black shit is, is coming out of his ears, you know?
Yeah.
It's full of black goo.
It's his pituitary gland.
Yeah.
Pituitary.
Pituitary.
Oh, man, less hot now.

(01:07:05):
Yeah.
I think I've seen the same black goo in 2012's Prometheus.
You had to put it all the way to your nose to smell it.
Yeah, he did.
You got to be sure.
I guess.
Nobody wants to believe that they shit their own pants.

(01:07:26):
Oh, see?
He's about to shit his pants, too.
Yeah, you called it.
It's that lactose.
Is your lactose acting up again?
This is babe, I'll be right back.
Oh, you don't have to leave.
Yeah, it's very hard on me.

(01:07:48):
This poor guy.
Yeah.
It's a rough time.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, you got to hide that.
You got to hide that.
You can't.
How are you going to fucking hide it, man?
You're in a wheelchair.
I ain't got no legs.
Go on out.

(01:08:08):
Yeah, you just got to-
The whole mattress is soaked.
You just got to-
Shove it in the army bag.
There wasn't ever sheets on this bed, mom.
You just gave me a fucking bear mattress.
Never come back.
I don't know what you're doing, lady.
It's like shit.

(01:08:29):
Gave me this shit stained mattress with no sheets on it.
That pitiful metal.
Man, he shit all the way up there on the head.
Yeah, he did.
I made sure to get it on these pillows, too.
Yeah, got bit by the gas.

(01:09:00):
This must be Gassim's mixtape.
Does she know she's fine?
It was 2010.
I don't think anybody knew.
That's true.
No, who just came down?
It's probably still sleeping.
Can you check on him, please?
Breakfast is ready.
Put me down when he's ready.

(01:09:21):
Damn, mom.
What the fuck?
He didn't eat much last night.
I thought he'd really be hungry.
I don't want to waste all this food.
Tad's always said you can bring back the dog with your breakfast.
Really going to shit himself now, mom?
Damn.
I seen taco meat in there.
That's not what I thought.
You did?

(01:09:44):
Yeah, I don't appreciate him being here overnight.
What did that girl do to her eyebrows?
Listen, blonde eyebrows are tough anyway.
And what she did is also testament of the time.
I was going to say it was 2010.

(01:10:04):
We had thin, arched eyebrows.
I'm not hungry.
You sure?
Mom made quite a spread out there.
You know, she can overdo it sometimes.
I made quite a spread in here, babe.
Smells like fucking death in here.

(01:10:25):
Why does it smell like diarrhea?
And decay.
It's not for that.
Oh, yeah.
That's the noise I can get behind.

(01:10:47):
It's not, you know.
Well, yeah, you're raping.
But, you know.
Do more of that.
Filmmakers.
I had a banana with it.
It tastes gross.

(01:11:07):
Everything tastes like mud.
I've never been so happy about a sound effect.
I still don't like it.
It's better than the fucking shit we've been through lately.
I know.

(01:11:30):
Just shit the bed.
What does it smell like?
Bitch, you ain't no nerd.
I'm just I think I'm just holding out hope for the last 15 minutes or whatever.

(01:12:01):
When that's all I got to look for, I guess.
What a shit show.
And I'm just not falling for the fucking PTSD story, man.
I think this maybe affects some people, but I just fucking hate it.
Well, it's like this is a this is like maybe we should hold off on Sunday.

(01:12:25):
Like a cop show caricature of PTSD.
I don't know.
Don't dig in the poop sack.
Leave the poop sack in the corner.
I don't know.
I think he put the put.
I think he put the poop sheets in his standard issue laundry bag.
Oh, OK.
Well, that would make sense.

(01:12:46):
She's about to find the laundry bag, though,
because she smelled shit in that room when she was in here earlier.
I smell something fishy.
Oh, maggoty.
There it is.
She found it.
You found what she was looking for.
That's not at all what was on the sheets when he.
I was pulling them off, though.

(01:13:07):
Now it's just like a black viscous liquid.
And now it's shit and maggoty.
It's time to fester.
That's true.
It's a little fight.
Yeah, turn from a liquid to a pile of solid shit.
Can you stop at the store and grab some asparagus when you're out?
Yeah, sure.

(01:13:28):
That's not what his diet needs.
Some real butter.
The salted time.
Oh, see.
God damn it, Camille Keaton.
I was on I was on your side when you said get that real butter salted, though.
You hate the fucking salted butter, and that's the kind I get.
You got to go on.
So God damn it.
I'm in Chris's camp on this as well.

(01:13:48):
Thank Jackson.
Lisa's.
But listen, I cook all the good meals in this fucking house.
Thank you.
OK, so the thing is,
the thing is, I don't actually prefer salted or unsalted.
You just get salted because that's like what my family always had was salted.

(01:14:13):
So I believe that I believe inherently in myself.
That's Jack's relationship with it as well.
Yeah, similar to the tea and the several cups of sugar that I brought up
because he made a gallon of tea with just a cup and a half of sugar.
And he behaved as though he had been abused.
But when I tell you I had a glass of it, it's still sweet as shit.

(01:14:36):
Mm hmm.
Yeah, dude.
OK, I know there is going to be a situation where you want butter and no salt.
You're right for me almost every time.
But I'm not like a salt guy. I don't like salt.

(01:14:56):
I don't need salt.
And then let's say you do want butter and salt in this situation.
Is he just eating sugar?
He's just eating salt or is that sugar?
Is that something about less sodium on the container?
Yeah, it did say less sodium.
Get unsalted butter.

(01:15:18):
Yeah, he doesn't need more salt.
I got it.
Yeah, he doesn't need more salt.
Sorry, honey, I got it.
Yeah, I don't think you have anything, mom.
Yeah, he's eating salt.
It is salt, yeah.
That's good. This is good.
Where's your chair?

(01:15:39):
There is no chair, mom.
Is this going to be like a venom situation?
Or like a slug situation, maybe.
Slug.
Oh, man, he's trying to kill the slug in there.
He does think there's something inside him.
I think he's right.
Oh, I don't like the spoon in the air.

(01:16:01):
Yeah.
He didn't need that.
Shout out to the Yergs from Animorphs.
Brain slugs.
He obviously doesn't need that chair, lady.
Yeah, I think he's doing fine.
I don't think you're reacting strongly enough to what's happening.

(01:16:23):
Hallelujah.
I think this is the Lord's work.
Must have been that hearty breakfast I cooked.
How did you get in here?
I mean, I walked.

(01:16:46):
Yeah, Camille Keaton's pretty hot for an old lady.
She's hot.
No, she's a hot lady for sure.
I don't even know how old she is in 2010, but.
It doesn't matter.
Still fuckable.
What about Bruce?
I'm not a good actor.
Bruce also hot if I could shave the.

(01:17:08):
Even if it's just the rat tail, just ditch the rat tail part.
Yeah, that's the worst part.
Just relax.
I'll take care of him.
I also don't like the mutton chop things or whatever they are.
Yeah, that's not really my guppity, but I don't.
Yeah, just his little fucking wisps on the side pieces.

(01:17:28):
I think if we took those off.
He could even keep the fucking back piece, man.
I don't know.
Well, the rest of it's yeah, whatever it's that.
It's that fucking hair extension tape.
It's on his head.
Right behind his ear.
Yeah.
At all.

(01:17:50):
I'm not going to need that no more.
And how does it not drive him mad having it like.
Yeah, dude.
Getting tickled behind the ear.
Yeah.
Anytime you step outside.
Yeah.
I was going to bring this up earlier.
So I want to know if we're seeing what they're actually seeing.

(01:18:13):
OK, yeah, we're about to answer that question because he's touching it.
Yeah, I'm like, don't you think you would be like, hey, you need to be in the
hospital, man?
Yeah, you're the crypt keeper.
Yeah, I think even mom said, you know, his skin's all fucked up.

(01:18:36):
I don't know.
I think, you know, the day he came home, they were just trying to I don't know.
I think they just assumed the army had it covered.
What are you looking at?
Oh, yeah.

(01:18:57):
I'm freaking out a little bit.
A little bit.
Yeah.
A little bit freaking out is justified.
I'm fine.
So, well, what's our what's our MP's name?

(01:19:17):
Brad.
Brad.
Yeah.
Brad's physically chinless, but the rest of this family is
this is chinless behavior all around.
Well, he's surrounded by idiots, for one.

(01:19:37):
So baseline, not a great start.
That's what's wrong with your baby.
Yeah.
I mean, this man was in a wheelchair.
You could have done anything with him.
You could fucking rub him into the fucking ER.
Come on now.
Well, remember, the girl took the car.
She told the girl to take the car.

(01:19:58):
But that was like day whatever I'm talking about from the jump.
I'm like, I know, Scraner Van, come back, load him back up.
This is.
I think what I think right now, they're trying to call the girl with the car
and they can't get a hold of the girl with the car.

(01:20:18):
Maybe I don't fucking know.
Like, why are you not just calling an ambulance?
They're like, Oh, did you try to call the doctor?
I just got the voicemail.
This is America.
Well, I think that's ambulance worthy.
Brad does not look good.

(01:20:39):
I could have told you that yesterday.
It was terrible, man.
Plus something right up here.
That's coming from me.
I'm eating a salami and mayonnaise sandwich right now.
I heard about you last night sneaking in here.
You know how disrespectful that is in my mother's house?
Yo, Bruce, you got a problem?

(01:20:59):
Yeah.
Who the fuck do you think you are?
I'm DJ Gaz, bitch.
Yeah.
Wow.
Someone lay hands on this man.
I've been here.
Where the fuck you been?
Walking around here with your ass closed.
I can like shit ain't happening.
Maybe you act like you're scared.

(01:21:20):
Cause I am not scared of you.
You ain't gotta be scared.
But I bet I make you scream that way.
You know you're sick.
Whoa.
Wait, are we fucking or fighting?
I know.
I'm heart.
I know, damn.
Bet I can make you scream.

(01:21:42):
I'm DJ Gaz.
You need any help?
Things are crazy right now.
Does Ash know what's going on?
We're waiting for her.
What?
The things he does with his lips while speaking make me angry.
Oh, don't touch.
Don't go in there, Pucky.
Oh, no.

(01:22:04):
That didn't look good.
That didn't look good.
Bruce is doing some man shit.
He's gotta go cut some wood, take some anger out, I guess.
I don't know.
Mom's screaming at him over the chainsaw, though.
I can't even get any peace out here cutting wood, man.

(01:22:31):
Shit, man.
You scared me.
Just in there, up in there eating all their food.
Motherfucker, he's over there eating a dog right now.
Oh, no.
Not Fulci.
Yo, you hungry or something?
You want a sandwich?
Do some extra lunch meeting here.
You see him munch, munch, munching?
Does he look hungry to you?

(01:22:55):
No, I think he's looking at him from behind.
I don't think he sees what he's doing yet.
That would have been perfect if we had the dog, the pug, going, just squealing.
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
Because they can't breathe.
Yeah.
Oh, no.

(01:23:17):
Damn.
No.
Wow.
All right.
Oh, shit.
Peace out.
No.
Now, dude, this looks like the Men in Black alien guy.
Yeah, that's what I thought, too.
When he comes in and says he wants sugar water.

(01:23:38):
Sugar water.
Yeah, except this one wants salt.
And pug.
Uh-huh.
Some salty dog.
I'm about to eat Gazm, too.

(01:23:59):
No.
Gazm defend himself.
Gazm ate him.
Gazm fucked him up, I guess.
Finally, a real...
Oh, no.
Gazm did not fare well.
No.
They both got fucked up.
I don't even know what happened.

(01:24:20):
Let me get the mantle towel out of her.
That's what...
That's step one.
Yeah, step one.
Cover up the half-eaten dog.
The problems with this film are myriad and relentless.
Let me tell you what my step one would be.

(01:24:43):
Fucking turn her around and walk away.
Excluding myself from this situation.
I don't even fucking live here.
I don't even fucking live here.
He went straight to making out with his brother.
Yeah, he did.
That's crazy.
These are crazy people.
Yeah, that guy is infected.

(01:25:04):
Now the girl's like, I'm back with the car, guys.
Where do we need to go?
Dance class was great.
You want to see my purie?
You want to see...
Puri-iet?
How do you fucking say it?
Purie.
Purie.
I don't know.
I like this.
What do you want to show me, Chris?
I want to see my...
Purie.

(01:25:24):
Double entendre.
I think the first one you were going for was probably plie.

(01:25:53):
Yeah.
And then it was pirouette.
Yeah, that one's the pirouette.
Do you like how they're like, I got to cover up the dead dog.
And then they immediately go to Brad.
And no one has even acknowledged Gazm laying in the corner.

(01:26:17):
Literally, the only time Gazm was shown affection this entire film is when
Blondie begrudgingly accepted Kaka in the middle of the night.
So I don't think they're that plus over Gazm's demise.
They're tolerating Gazm at best.
This is a get out situation.

(01:26:38):
Yeah, earlier when Chris said get out, I was going to say wrong movie.
Yeah, this was the reverse get out.
This is where they've been trying to kick the black guy out the whole movie.
Now she found him.
Stumble the pot.
She's just delaying.
Yeah.
Remember side parts?

(01:26:59):
Oh yeah.
I'd still have one if I had hair.
Come on, just get mom out of here.
I'll take care of all this.
What does that mean?

(01:27:21):
Burn the fucking house down.
Are you going to make out with the black guy now?
I tell you, he immediately started making out with his dead brother.
I get it, but oh my God, this is so trite.

(01:27:46):
We can't even walk because we're girls.
I need a man to lead us out of here.
Oh God, they got to cut it out with this too.
He's back.

(01:28:09):
Hey, here's the job ripping.
Man, I thought it was going to be Brad's jaw
because his jaw was all fucked up looking earlier.
Look at the tongue.
Holy shit.
Wow.
Oh God.

(01:28:31):
Oh, that was pretty fucking amazing.
Sure was.
Oh God, this mom.

(01:28:54):
Wow, dude, that was fucking cool, man.
It almost redeems this movie, but it doesn't.
It doesn't.
It was cool, though.
It's crazy because I have kind of liked the movie.
It was like it almost felt like a parody or, you know,

(01:29:20):
like a spoof of something.
I don't know.
And how did they just now discover soundtracking?
I don't know what happened.
I would like to say all the soundtracks and sound effects
have been, you know, easy to listen to up to this point.

(01:29:44):
So nothing has been like, oh, I got to take my head off.
I'm going to go back to the beginning.
So nothing has been like, oh, I got to take my headphones off.
So that's nice.
No, I think we've taken that for granted.
Oh, he just punched through the freaking door and
I was grabbed her by the freaking hair now by the head.

(01:30:07):
What's he going to do to her?
Oh, no.
Wow.
Oh, holy shit.
Oh, my God.
Damn.
How's it going?
No.

(01:30:31):
Mom, you got to get these legs to move in, honey.
I know, right?
Why are you still here?
Well, walking wasn't going great for her.
That's true.
There's a door right fucking there.
Get out, mom.
Listen, I'm going to I'm going to fight him.

(01:30:57):
With a fucking cast iron horse statue or something.
Yeah, it was like a thing hanging on the wall.
Is it?
Why?
She do it to herself.
Am I?
Oh, no.
On his head.
OK.
Yeah, it's him.
She's just bad at like even the even the thoughts are good.

(01:31:17):
Yeah.
Maybe a little too subdued.
I think all the sounds have been like slightly muted,
but that might just be from my end.
I'm not sure.
No, I think I know what you mean.
Well, I think those thoughts were fine for how she was actually hitting him.

(01:31:40):
She wasn't great at that.
You know what I mean?
Like, yeah, you could tell those hits were not landing very hard.
Wow.
Hey, the two.
The two.

(01:32:03):
I don't think it's supposed to look like that.
That's a fucking chest burster.
Oh, my God.
It really was a year.
Oh, wow.
Looks just like your father's.

(01:32:23):
Yeah.
Probably keep lacking.
I don't know.
I just would have so been not here by now.
Uh huh.
That was too long for this to have been.
How it went down.
Yeah, we cut the deal.

(01:32:46):
Is that Taylor Swift?
That's the blonde girl.
That's Gazzam.
Cutting the old home.
That's the old home.
Cut an old home video.
So he's always had shit here.
OK.
Yeah.

(01:33:11):
Did she hang herself after I see her?
Did that finally come home?
Oh, God.
Yeah, that's exactly what that was.
Dad came home and she has hung herself in the garage.
That's crazy.

(01:33:32):
What a disappointing turn of events.
Maybe just for me.
That was terrible.
Yeah, I think I liked it more than you guys did.
Yeah, because I didn't at all.
So.

(01:33:54):
It was amazing.
Not because it was like supposed to be, though.
I don't think.
What do the what do the gays do for ripped assholes?
Is there like a home remedy?
So I don't there are things they say to put.

(01:34:15):
Is it sugar on collapsed rectums?
Is your asshole ripped?
Maybe.
If it's just hemorrhoids, just get some preparation.
OK.
Hey, man, it's a fucking jungle down there.
You know what's going on?
Have you seen your own asshole?
Do straight guys know what their own asshole looks like?

(01:34:36):
No, I mean, I don't really know the general consensus,
but I've never looked at it.
Yeah, that's what I mean.
I think.
Yeah, I.
There's something you should look at, though.
I think knowing what your body looks like on a good day is probably good baseline.
Yeah, I mean, that way, if some fuck shit goes down,
you're like, well, that's not supposed to look like that,

(01:34:58):
because if you just have no baseline, like, how do you even what do you compare it to?
Exactly.
Yeah, I mean, you need to take a peek at your own butthole, dude.
For me, it's just like sheer curiosity in general.
I'd want to I'd want to know.
Well, I do know.
I know what my asshole looks like.

(01:35:18):
Right.
I'm not even a bottom.
I haven't taken dick in a long time.
Really?
Yeah.
I don't know if I like aged out of it.
No, because I fucked that six year old man and he was really good at it.
Taking dick, that is.
So, no, not everyone ages out of it.
I did, though.
Yeah.
Well, that was sell a terseca.

(01:35:44):
I think I liked it more than you guys did.
But to me, do you like this one, Lisa?
Can you tell?
I kind of liked it.
It wasn't terrible.
You know, it wasn't complete shit like some of the stuff we've been watching.
I do think that, you know, it was a little long for not much happening, really.

(01:36:07):
I think we spent too much time building up to his freak out.
Yeah, I do think I agree.
It was a little long.
The family drama portion didn't really resonate with me.
And I think that's kind of because from what I was reading, I think this is kind of a divisive movie.

(01:36:31):
I think you have the people that really like the drama portion and don't like the gore portion.
And then you have the people that hate the drama portion and love the gore.
Yeah, I think it didn't even mind so much.
I don't know if it's fair or not, but I think maybe it was just the acting that made it unbearable for me.

(01:36:59):
Yeah, we know some like wooden stilted acting that I think we've seen before.
And yeah, and it makes it hard, especially when I think, you know, an hour and a half of the movie is really leaning on the acting.
Yeah, because I think Wheelchair Boy did OK.

(01:37:23):
Unfortunately, that sister was the worst.
My thing is, like, the acting was bad.
But then I think about how much worse we've seen.
And then we've seen some disease.
Maybe it wasn't that bad.
I think it was pretty bad.

(01:37:45):
That is, yeah, I would say the two things I didn't like about it were was like the acting and that it was a little long.
But it honestly didn't even feel long.
That's the thing. It is everything.
And yeah, it didn't actually feel like it didn't feel like 45 minutes.
Like I wasn't checking the time.

(01:38:06):
Yeah, which is right.
Which I think is a fucking blessing.
You know, that's true.
Yeah, I just think that the family, all the family stuff went on a little too long, I think.
Yeah.
There were some suspicious.
I guess you'd call them like editing choices.
I don't know.
Like when the camera angles would change and for what was strange pretty much the whole time, because they would pan to just someone making a weird face for a bit that unrelated to anything.

(01:38:38):
Usually it was about the mom.
She'd just be making a face somewhere with her chopsticks in her hair.
I don't know.
I just didn't.
I did not care for this.
I wanted to, because I really like Mr. Vogel.
Yeah.
I do too.

(01:39:00):
But yeah, I didn't. I didn't care.
I do think I belong in the latter camp of people who thought the dramatic bits were garbage, but the gory bits were great.
They really were.
Yeah, dude, that's where I'm at.
You know, of course it was.
That exposed neck tongue situation.
Whoa, that was crazy.
That was great.

(01:39:22):
Yeah, man.
That was cool.
I almost wanted to run it back, man.
And impaling the girl on the door.
Yeah.
And then freaking severing her head.
Yeah, they did what The Shining should have done.
Yeah.
Man.
I think it's almost a reference to Zombie.

(01:39:46):
It's an old Italian movie.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Where girl gets her eye impaled in a fucking splintered ass door piece.
I haven't seen that, but I have seen clips of it in like other references.
Yeah.
And I did think of that.
And I couldn't recall what it was from, but I recalled the splinter through the fucking eye.

(01:40:10):
And I think it's a Fulci movie, which ties in with the dog.
That poor pug.
The twitching pug was good too.
Yes.
Yeah, it was.
Yeah.

(01:40:32):
I love the way it just got snatched up trying to check that guy's trash can.
I know.
Immediately I was like, oh, God, this is not good.
But yeah, I think every special effect, every fucking gore piece was
fucking out of this world.
Awesome.
It was really good.
We've been missing that lately, man.

(01:40:53):
Well, and you know, it was toe tag doing the special effects and they've been pretty good in everything we've seen them do.
I even think it was better than August Underground series.
Well, it was definitely like more focused on because in August Underground, I feel like they didn't really focus on right showing us the gore, you know.

(01:41:22):
Yeah.
And of course, you know, August Underground was, you know, crazy low budget.
Uh huh.
Found footage movie.
It was a different format all around.
Yeah, it's a look like a found footage.
I was also, you know, like first movie there ever made.
Yeah.

(01:41:44):
But when your first one's your best budget on this one's around twenty thousand.
I'm sure a lot of it went to Camille Keaton.
Maybe.
Maybe.
I mean, she like we said, not done anything in 17 years or something.
So that was your fun fact of the day.

(01:42:06):
And that had to just be a love letter to her.
And I spit on your grave from him, I guess, because let me tell you, lovely woman to behold, not great at the like behaving like a person or delivering lines bit that I usually attribute to actors.
Yeah.
Like the saying words sort of thing.

(01:42:27):
Yeah, it wasn't going great on those friends, but she looks excellent.
And for that, she has value.
And that alone.
Oh, my gosh.
I don't make the rules.
Yeah.
So, I mean, Brad comes home from his deployment in a wheelchair.

(01:42:48):
Yeah.
Frankenstein's monster.
Obviously, like a fucking zombie looking like a zombie day one paper mache skin.
He looked bad from the beginning.
And I don't know if we're just trying to, you know, have a good day or something.
Well, that has to be the motivator, right?

(01:43:09):
Like, yeah, we're just trying to be happy that Brad's back, but he is not looking good.
And yeah, you know, I think this is a family drama movie.
And, you know, I think if you can kind of get past the wooden acting, I think it's a I think it's a good one.

(01:43:31):
Yeah.
Well, and I guess if you choose to like view it as maybe it was cheesy to the point of camp, like maybe it was trying to be campy.
I don't know.
In which case, I guess I could view it with a little more grace.
Yeah.
I think we talked about a little bit.
I thought the sound effects are great.

(01:43:53):
Yeah.
We've been literally ear raped by sounds.
I think the last few movies that we've watched.
I mean, yeah, nothing was like nothing was over the top.
Yeah.
Made me want to take my headphones off.
All the music, all the sound effects were acceptable.

(01:44:16):
Yeah, we have been sort of inundated with like egregiously loud piercing sounds.
Yeah, dude.
So that was a refreshing change of pace.
I've seriously gone a little bit deaf from this podcast, I think.
I would like to say that I love how they committed to the literal brain worm in this guy's head, man, and how it just

(01:44:48):
Yeah, I was a gross, gross organ.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, I think it would have been, you know, easy to just like, oh, it's all in his head.
He's not crazy at all.
But yeah, he really had a fucking brain worm right in his cell of Tersica.
Yeah.
Well, because that was my question, because I thought maybe that's where we were going with it was it was all in his head.

(01:45:12):
Maybe they don't even know how bad he actually is.
Is he's are we seeing what they're seeing?
Yeah, because I have been like thinking it for a while.
And then right when I was about to ask it, that guy goes and touches the frickin blood or whatever the hell.
I knew we were only because when she went to find the poop sheets, the secret, sad poop sheets.

(01:45:33):
She said secret shit sheets.
Yeah.
But they were like maggots and shit.
And I was like, oh, he's invested with something.
This is an alien.
This is an alien risk predator situation.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's not alone in there.
I know he shared like all of his fucking war stories.
I don't know where the fucking brain worm comes into play.

(01:45:57):
So that was the whole thing, because he was like, they don't know what happened to us.
They just found us with all our equipment untouched and government.
We would never soldiers would never abandon government property.
Yeah.
That's no soldier I've ever met in my life.
I mean, I guess the only reason why you wouldn't is because you're an MP.

(01:46:19):
Because you're an MP or like when you get home, all that shit's going to be fucking counting.
And if something's missing, you're going to be staying there all goddamn night.
Yeah. But when I tell you one of my best friends, their shit got lost in the they lost it on the planes on the way home.
So he got charged with all that anyway.
Yeah. Yeah. You know, you're going to get charged with this shit.

(01:46:41):
You're going to get charged for it. Yeah.
When I got the fuck out, I got charged for so much shit and I swear I didn't even have it to begin with.
Yeah.
So my buddy said to me, he said, I don't do fucking poncho liners and fucking bullshit.
So much bullshit. Yeah.
Fuck. I don't know, man. I don't have it.

(01:47:04):
So do whatever. Same way with housing. Just get me the fuck out.
It was the same way with housing when we moved out.
They wanted to charge us for every little thing, like every single freaking mark on the wall.
And it's like, oh, we're going to repaint this wall, but we're going to charge you for this area.
We're going to charge you for this. Like, yeah, it was crazy.

(01:47:26):
Yeah, so bad. And like, you just don't care. You don't care.
Yeah. We're just like, OK, just get our shit and get us out of here.
Just get the fuck out. I just want to leave.
I've never heard it graceful like X at the Army. Sorry.
You know, it's a fucking bad time.
Ours was not terrible, though. It really wasn't. It could have been so much worse.

(01:47:48):
Getting in, though, pretty easy. Yeah, very easy.
All right. I think we've gave our overall thoughts pretty much right.
I think we're pretty much under.
Oh, I before we moved on, we were talking about Instagram.
I wanted to say that I follow Fred Vogel on Instagram and he's always posting like his record of the day and shit like that.

(01:48:13):
Yeah, I think I like it. Tastes crazy, too.
Like, it's just all over the place.
And then like there was pictures during football season of him like tailgating with his dad and shit.
And I was like, oh, I love this guy. Yeah, that's what I mean.
That's all the stuff I've seen of him is I think I like him.
I just didn't care for this film. Yeah. Yeah.
Fred Vogel seems like a genuinely cool motherfucker, man.

(01:48:36):
Like, I've never heard one bad thing about him.
Oh, and also he made the best and like the best found footage ever.
Yeah. Yeah. Well, he said I've seen so far.
Yeah, I know, man. Now I'm looking back at it and I'm like, I rated them so low.
Yeah, me too. As Chris said last week as well.

(01:48:57):
Lisa, give us your star rating and your what the fuck moment.
Damn. OK. I thought I knew. I thought I knew all this stuff.
I don't know anything.
My star rating is going to be two and a half stars, I think.
I wish that I could have sounded happier or better when I said that.

(01:49:21):
But Chris is very annoying. Yeah.
I think my what the fuck moment is the half eaten dead dog on the floor.
Pulse. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. I think the dead dog on the floor is my what the fuck moment.

(01:49:43):
Bo, what's your star rating and what the fuck?
But I'm going to go.
It's so rough sometimes following Lisa because I'm like, this was dark shit.
She's like, I liked it. But then she goes two and a half stars.
Yeah, I liked it more than all you guys did. So two and a half.
It's going to be the same rating as you guys.

(01:50:04):
I liked it more than you guys. So it's going to be like the same rating.
It's so desperate, which is fine. That's valid. Your feelings are valid.
I hold space for your feelings. You're welcome.
This is my one safe place. This is your one safe place. Yeah.
No, I am going to go lower. I want to give it like two ish stars.

(01:50:29):
I want to give the props department like a four or a five and everything else.
A one. So should I find like a median in there or should I just give it a two?
I don't know. That's the thing.
I'm like it ends on like a high note when, you know, I think an hour and a half is.

(01:50:52):
Ridiculous. Pretty, pretty low.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We'll go to we'll go to because yeah, it was silly.
My what the fuck moment is going to be.
My name is Gavin. Call me. What was it? Gasm. Call me Gasm.

(01:51:17):
I would I would like it noted that I said I fucking won't do that.
And then the guy said, I'm not doing that. I appreciated at least that.
I got at least that.
A little dip into reality somewhere in this.
Thank you. His apps are fucking lately not Gasm.
First impression. Yeah, I'm Gasm. Here's my fucking mixtape.

(01:51:43):
The way I would have chunks that mixtape right at his fucking head.
What about you, Chris? What's your star rating and what the fuck moment?
I think I'm going to go three stars on this one.
I think my what the fuck moment is going to be when they pull fucking Bruce's neck piece off and his fucking tongue is like, yeah.

(01:52:10):
Was a banger. Yeah, I loved it. Yeah.
Lisa, how spicy is this movie?
OK, I'm not sure if I've used this before.
You have? Probably.
This movie is that chili chocolate, that chili chocolate bar I used to get.

(01:52:31):
Yeah, it's like dark chocolate, but it has chili in it and like chili powder or something, I'm assuming.
No, man, it was like chunks of chilies, wasn't it?
Was it syntax?
No, it was actually just at Wal-Mart. You could buy it, but they don't have it anymore.
I don't think. Yeah, it's a it's a guard.

(01:52:52):
It's a guard Elio's. Oh, I thought I was going to be one of those Mexican candies.
No, no, no, it was just at Wal-Mart.
You could buy it. It was like dark chocolate and chili.
But yeah, it was like really good.
And if you let it melt in your mouth, it was just like chocolate.
And then at the end, it was spicy. And that's what this movie is.

(01:53:15):
Damn good chocolate, which is probably why they don't sell it anymore.
Good pick, please. Yeah.
Oh, how spicy is this movie?
This is like a this is like a an extra scoop of ice cream when you're entirely lactose intolerant.

(01:53:36):
Yeah.
I don't even care. Just give me the ice cream. Yeah.
Yeah. Just let me shit. Chris knows all about it, man.
He eats ice cream all the time, even though he shouldn't.
I never have poop problems with it. I'm always a puker.
That's really not worth it. No, it is.

(01:53:57):
Is it? I think it depends on the ice cream.
I mean, I'll puke pretty much anywhere, man.
I've done it in like parking lots on the way. Yeah.
Out of the restaurant, you know, like, you know, you get one of those skillet cookies with a big old ice cream scoop on it.

(01:54:18):
And it's so fucking good. And you eat the whole thing.
You're walking out to the car, puke a little bit.
Yeah, I'm an efficient puker, so it's not ever that much of a deal.
It's just like, yeah, a nuisance.
And honestly, I feel pretty fucking good after doing it.
Yeah. Chris, how spicy is this film?

(01:54:39):
This film right here is, man, I guess you could almost call it one of them slow burners, just like the ones from last week, man.
Mm hmm. This is you smoke one of them cigarettes, right?
And you don't know it, but somebody put a little firecracker at the very end of it. It blows up in your face.

(01:55:02):
Well, you didn't notice at all. I had no idea.
I'm sucking on this thing real hard. Almost no payout.
I loved every second of it. So, God, this suck a little harder.
Yeah, you like this suck a little harder.

(01:55:29):
You like it when it blows up at the end.
So I know I did a good job.
All right, Lisa, all this left for you to do is slot this in on your leaderboard.
And this is where we rank every movie we've covered on the podcast.

(01:55:53):
And if you would like to see it, it's linked in every it's linked in all the show notes that we do.
So you can look at our leaderboard, see our recommendations.
So, Lisa, where is Sella Tersica falling on your leaderboard?

(01:56:14):
Not one reference to the cella Tersica, by the way.
I'm glad I shared that little fact with you.
Yeah, I thought this was going to have more to do with like the two Terry Clements.
Yeah, I thought we were going to get us a taric with it and said we got fucking weird and poopy.

(01:56:38):
All right. I think this is going to go.
This is going to go in my number 17 spot below a Serbian film and above.
I drink your blood.
I think your blood was bad.
I know I was just looking at it like man I have that too high on my list.

(01:57:02):
I have a two hand mine as well.
I think it's good.
Why did I put it high?
Because the little boy poisons meat pies feeds them to hippies.
I did appreciate that.
That's good.
I do love a good rabies stroke.
All right, Bo.
Where's it going to go on your leaderboard?
I don't want to put it above his other August films.

(01:57:23):
Yeah, I can't go above that.
Well, so I can't know.
I know it won't go above August underground.
But where I was going to put it is above his other two August ones.
Oh, yeah, because I have those way too low on my list.
I do have August underground.
No, but here's the thing.
We are romanticizing it a little bit in our brains, I'm sure, because there was issues with the second one.

(01:57:47):
It was long as shit too.
And that woman was aggressively irritating.
Crusty.
No, man, I think I like I think I.
I'm a librarian.
Now, fuck me.
I would maybe put the other two a little bit higher, but I think I like this.
Like the first one should be the best.
This should be the highest.

(01:58:08):
The other two are just kind of whatever is flesh games that knock off Jackass.
Yeah. Yeah.
All right.
Jack's a public.
Let's put this right below flesh games and above tumbling dollar.
Oh, man, this is a tough one.
Thanks. It's bad, but it's not as bad as some of this shit we've seen.

(01:58:31):
Yeah.
And, you know, I hate my leaderboard right now.
Yeah.
You have a contentious relationship with your own opinions.
I've noticed.
Yeah, because now I think I need to rate things higher, but they're lower and I can't put so Tersica higher than my lower things that should be higher.

(01:58:52):
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
But you've evolved into this this thing where it's like, you know, like no one gets a zero because once they zeros.
Yeah.
No, that's just what I've gathered from other people rating things.
Okay. Yeah.
I don't believe that.
I think some things are firmly zero.

(01:59:14):
Yeah.
I guess the real question is, would I watch this over more them?
I don't know.
I guess I would watch this over more them if I'm being honest.
It is a tough one, man.
I really think I would.
I think I would, too.
Yeah. So I think I want to make this my new number 26 below American Guinea pig sacrifice and above August undergrounds more of them.

(01:59:41):
I keep forgetting sacrifices in America was a was a guinea pig.
I know.
I think I need to drop a fucking AGP in front of it or something because yeah.
All right.
That's it for sell it.
Tersica.
Yeah.
Not a bad movie.
I don't know if I would 100 percent recommend it, though.

(02:00:07):
The gore was absolutely amazing, man.
I think I recommend the clip of that tongue.
Yeah.
I think that's what we've been missing lately, man.
Some crazy gore.
I think it's one of the few movies I would recommend to people because I don't think it, you know, it's not as crazy as a lot of movies.
We've watched.
Yeah, it's a good gateway drug.

(02:00:29):
Yeah.
Yeah.
If you want something on the milder side.
But I mean, I don't know.
It goes fucking hard in the last 10 minutes.
Yeah.
But got to see a fucking dead pug pulsating on the ground.
We did see pulsating.
All right.
Well, daddy, what are we watching next?

(02:00:53):
Well, next week, that was weird.
Next week.
Why are the lights flickering?
I think we lost Bo.
Lily, the studio has been compromised.
Try turning it off and on again.

(02:01:14):
OK.
I unplug the computer and it's still on.
And it's still on.
Here, I'll do it.
Goodbye, Beach.

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