April 28, 2025 • 40 mins
In this episode of Yapping Schnauzers, we explore the messy world of Unfair Expectations — and wow, are people expecting way too much! 🫣
From family members furious over who had the first grandkids 👶, to a husband's wardrobe war that sparks a neighborhood showdown 👖, to bringing your own allergy-safe food and being labeled "disrespectful" 🍱 - the drama never stops.
We also unpack a best friend's unexpected pregnancy putting major pressure on a homeowner 🏠, a husband refusing to help with his own child 🍼, and a vegetarian forced to fight for her plate at an unforgiving family dinner 🍖🥦.
👉🏼Stream now at yappings.com or your favorite podcast streaming platform and let the yapping begin!
Join our Facebook Group AITA - Relationship and Family Drama
Links to threads read:
- AITAH for telling my brother's wife to stop whining about how it is not fair that I gave the family the first grandkids?
- AITA For refusing to go out with my husband because of the way he dresses?
- AITA for "ruining" my boyfriend's family dinner by bringing my own food?
- My best friend is pregnant
- AITAH for leaving my husband after he refused to help with our child?
- AITA for walking out of dinner when my boyfriend's family insisted I eat meat after 4 years vegetarian?
~
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Intro (00:00):
Yapping!
Erika (00:02):
Hello, this is Erika.
Edgar (00:04):
And Edgar.
Erika (00:05):
And we are the Yapping Snowsers. We entertain you with
Yap worthy stories we findaround the web. Today's theme is
unfair expectations. The firststory is, am I the asshole for
telling my brother's wife tostop whining about how it is not
fair that I gave the family thefirst grandkid? Hello everyone,
(00:27):
I'm 29 female and my husbandthirty male.
I respecting twins. Oh my God,twins. I'm pretty close to my
husband's family while I'm notso close with my family. My mom
always wanted three boys, butshe had me after two brothers,
30 male and 32 male. Sometimes Italk to N because he and my
(00:47):
husband like to frequent thesame gym.
So they sometimes talk at thegym. My other brother isn't the
best. He bullied me when I was akid because of my asthma and the
fact that I am on the spectrum.I didn't invite him or his wife
to my wedding because of how hetreated me while I grew up. My
mom said she wouldn't come butmy dad told her to stop playing
favorites and she stayed quietduring the wedding.
(01:09):
Now my brother's wife alwayswants to be the center of
attention. She was always sayinghow she and my brother was the
first ones to get married andshe wanted to have a baby when
they went to their honeymoon sotheir baby could be the first
grandkid. Well, she still isn'tpregnant and they have been
together for four years.Recently I found out me and my
(01:30):
hubby are expecting with twins.This will be the first set of
twins and grandkids in thefamily.
And she went ballistic. Sheyelled, screamed, throwed
things, told me that I'm selfishfor not waiting for her to have
a baby and that everythingshould be about her, not the
(01:50):
unwanted girl. She screamed andI took her chance of being the
first girl of the family andother crazy things. I told her
to shut up and stop acting likeshe was special because she was
not. And that it's not my faultthat she still isn't pregnant.
She called my husband some slursbecause he is black and I just
punched her right in the face.My dad and husband took me away
(02:11):
from her and she started cryingsaying, I don't deserve kids. My
mom told me that I should havebeen the bigger person and
ignore her. But how could Iignore her when she called my
husband and raised his slur? Tis saying that he will press
charges on me for attacking hiswife and that I'll lose custody
of my kids.
Please. I'm afraid of losing mybabies because of that. I'm not
(02:33):
a violent person. I don't knowwhat got into me to hit her, but
my husband said I was a baddieand not a fault, but I'm still
doubting myself. So read it, amI the asshole?
Edgar (02:47):
It just kinda screams like a trashy family, but So,
Opie's just so it's just likeit's just crazy, like, to want
the world to stop for her tohave, like, her first child, but
it's been, like, four years.
Erika (02:59):
Four years!
Edgar (03:00):
At that point, yeah, like, she lost her hands.
Erika (03:02):
She's either
Edgar (03:03):
not trying or not trying hard enough.
Erika (03:06):
Maybe somebody's infertile or they're having
trouble with conceiving, whichis, you know, everybody's
different, is, you know, it's astruggle and maybe she had a
mental breakdown, but come on.
Edgar (03:17):
Yeah, but at the same time, it's not about like, it
doesn't mean that that familydoesn't have a kid anymore or
shouldn't have a kid anymore.
Erika (03:26):
I know. I'm not excusing or I'm not trying to defend her,
I'm just saying you know maybethat's the reason why. But
however her attitude andthrowing stuff, yeah I don't
understand where she's reallycoming from. Her opinion and the
reason that she became the firstperson to have kids doesn't
change anything. I think sheneeds some, maybe a therapy or
(03:49):
something for anger issuesbecause it's not happening.
Edgar (03:53):
Yeah, that's very rational. And then also, they
want to get OP's kids taken awayfrom her over it.
Erika (03:58):
That's unrealistic.
Edgar (03:59):
It's very. It's just pettiness. They just want the
kids to be gone so they canclaim, Oh, okay, basically,
technically, you have no kids.So there's no first kids yet
from this family.
Erika (04:09):
I don't get the raven, like who wants to be first or
who wants to, like I don'tunderstand. You shouldn't give
birth to a kid just because youwant to be the first of the
family to have a kid. That's notthe reason to have kids, that's
crazy to me. The mentality is alittle bit off.
Edgar (04:26):
It's a very me centric kind of
Erika (04:28):
How would you have reacted if somebody called me a
racist slur?
Edgar (04:34):
I would say it back to them. You gotta always one them
up. I'll make their jaws drop.Oh my gosh. I'll invent a new
one.
Erika (04:49):
My gosh.
Edgar (04:50):
Who are you?
Erika (04:54):
I don't know. I've never had a situation like that, so I
don't know how I would react. Italso depends like what word they
used. Like, you know, if it'sextremely offensive, I would
definitely say something. Yeah.
But if it's something, like,stupid, I'd be like, alright,
child, you know?
Edgar (05:13):
Mhmm. I remember when I was in, like, this was towards
the end of college, but I waswalking back from the grocery
and all of sudden someone pushedme while I was walking. Like,
was in New York City, too. Andthey pushed me and then I went
to terms and they were like,Hey, just put their groceries
down and they were like, Go backto the border. But the thing
(05:34):
was, they were also Mexican.
What? They were short Mexican.Maybe more than they looked more
Mexican than I was.
Erika (05:41):
You do not look Mexican, though.
Edgar (05:42):
Well, they look more Spanish.
Erika (05:44):
That is crazy.
Edgar (05:45):
I was like, And then I was gonna like, I felt like
fighting, I guess. But then theyput out a chain.
Erika (05:53):
Okay. You don't
Edgar (05:54):
want mess with It's like, I don't have anything. All I
have is my groceries and I'm notrooting that over, like, some
comment.
Erika (06:00):
Yeah, definitely. Actually, now that you say that,
I think New York is such adiversital place that you see a
lot of people and encounter alot of people that really, know,
assholes. I remember one time wewere my whole family went to New
York and we were in a bus, Ibelieve or we were in oh, we
were not in the bus. We were inSubway. And we were all sitting
(06:23):
down and then this lady shewould had to be at least like
three hundred pounds.
And she was walk? Yes, she couldwalk.
Edgar (06:31):
She
Erika (06:31):
was very slow, but she could walk. And she sat in the
back and I don't know if Hectorjust because he was looking
around just like any normalperson would do. Not looking at
her directly, but she felt likehe was looking at her like
giving him beady eyes like,judging look. But he he was he
wasn't. And so that lady wentoff on him.
(06:54):
Called all of us like like justeverything name you could think
of of racist, she said it.
Edgar (07:01):
You're crazy.
Erika (07:02):
And we were just like, what? What just happened? We
were so in shock. And then Ithink after she left, nobody
said anything, but everybody wasgiving her dirty looks like
everybody else. Mhmm.
We we didn't wanna I thinkHector said something about
like, yeah, that's not myintention or something like
that. But she just didn't careuntil she finally left. And
(07:22):
everybody else was like, oh, youknow, we apologize for what she
did. Like she had no right.Like, maybe she's not mentally
stable.
Like it was just crazy.Everybody was just like you
could hear a pin drop in thetrain. Because it was just
insane. I just couldn't believeit. And like after that, that's
the only racist situation I wasYeah.
(07:45):
Do you think she went too far bypunching her in the face?
Edgar (07:48):
Yeah, just because once you do violence, just like, it
always gets very legal at thatpoint and then people can call
the cops or all that stuff. Andeven if it's like self defense,
like in most cases in worsestates, you still get in
trouble. I'm not like a lawyer,I'm not sure what would be like
the verdict in this case interms of like, oh, she kind of
(08:08):
offended me first so I hit herback.' Well, was throwing stuff
so you could
Erika (08:12):
also get that as assault, know what I mean?
Edgar (08:14):
Yeah, but it just becomes very legally sticky at that
point because there's so manyvariables you have to just
document and fight it through.So, think it wasn't really worth
it to throw a punch if like,you're just gonna get more in
trouble. Then now they have likethis whole legal thing with
their kids too. Like all ittakes is like one crazy person.
Yeah.
Like, to like escalate it.
Erika (08:36):
Yeah. I mean, I think everybody has a breaking point,
honestly.
Edgar (08:39):
I
Erika (08:40):
mean, it's up to you how you would react. Either you're
gonna, you know, use violence oryou're just gonna walk away.
It's just one of those thingswhere it's fight or fight or
fight, you know?
Edgar (08:50):
Fight or flight, yeah.
Erika (08:51):
Yeah. Fight or flight. So the top comment is not the
asshole at all. Sometimes peoplejust push you too far and it's
understandable to snap. Itdoesn't mean you're a bad person
or unfit to handle things.
Everyone has their limits andit's important to stand up for
yourself when necessary. But no,definitely not losing custody
over standing up for yourself ina tough situation. Yeah, think
(09:15):
legally they could take away thekids just for this, but I mean,
Edgar (09:18):
Yeah, can try, but there's no danger to the kids.
This is just like an unrelentingincident. And I doubt that OP's
sister-in-law was like gravelyinjured from this, so.
Erika (09:32):
Yeah, I mean, yeah. I think it's just out context
here. I think he definitely Imean, I don't think she's a bad
person. She feels bad like also,you know. It's just they pushed
her too far.
Edgar (09:46):
To the final verdict?
Erika (09:48):
No, don't think she's an asshole. The brother and the
sister-in-law is kind ofunhinged. They need some type of
help, mental health orsomething, mental help.
Edgar (09:58):
Yeah, definitely hoping he's in the asshole, I wouldn't
have punched because that justmakes it more difficult
Erika (10:03):
for Yeah, definitely not. I don't agree with violence.
Edgar (10:06):
I don't think she's going get in trouble, but still, she's
still going to have to gothrough that entire situation.
And it's like not pleasant. So,the next story is titled, Am I
the asshole for refusing to goout with my husband because of
the way he dresses? I, 40female, have been getting into
arguments lately with myhusband, forty eight male, about
how he dresses around ourneighborhood. He often goes for
(10:28):
walks together, but recently hestarted wearing skin tight
compression leggings.
Men usually wear these or shortsover them, but he just wants to
wear them alone. You can seeeverything. We live in the
Southern United States in aconservative area and I just
don't feel like it'sappropriate. He says he doesn't
care what other people think,but I feel like it's just
inconsiderate of our neighbors.Tonight he put on a pair of
(10:52):
compression type shorts and theyliterally look like underwear.
They're cotton, not spandex bythe way. I refused to go out
with him like that and he blewup at me. He said that bikers
wear shorts like that all thetime, so why can't he? I tried
to explain that it's differenthere in the neighborhood and
that people would be weird anduncomfortable with him dressing
like that with their kidsrunning around. I do feel crazy,
(11:15):
but he's not from The UnitedStates, and I often feel like,
okay, that explains a lot.
And I often feel like he has acomplete disregard for
respecting other people in thename of doing what he wants.
He's from a country that haseven more social pressures and
expectations, and I'm alwaysvery careful how I dress and
behave when we visit. I don'tknow, am I just being a prude?
(11:35):
So, Reddit, am I the asshole? I
Erika (11:39):
don't think she's being a prude. I think she's valid for
her well, I would sayrecommendations of him wearing
that. I mean, think it's veryuncomfortable.
Edgar (11:49):
Mhmm.
Erika (11:50):
I mean, no parent wants to have somebody walking around
with tight shorts that you couldsee everything.
Edgar (11:58):
I know, it's pretty weird. I would put him on a
list. On a few lists actuallyfor her, for that behavior.
Erika (12:06):
Do you think there was a nice way to say, you know, not
to wear that? Or do you thinkshe kind of
Edgar (12:12):
He doesn't deserve a nice way to tell him to put on some
clothes. Like, it's just weird.I mean, I I'm gonna be very
biased here and say that when Iread that he wasn't from The
United States, it kind of madesense to me.
Erika (12:25):
But then she said that he's from a place in the country
where they even have morepressures and expectations.
Edgar (12:31):
So he's probably hiding something, you know? He's just
now that he's in a place wherehe could be more open, he's just
letting it out and just doesn'tcare.
Erika (12:39):
I don't know.
Edgar (12:40):
Actually By before he was compressed and now he can just
go free.
Erika (12:45):
I don't understand here. Think he just needs to respect
others. I mean, I understandeverybody has a free rein with
clothing or representingyourself, whatever, but there's
children, come on.
Edgar (12:57):
Yeah, just like a time and place. Like, if he wants to
wear his spandex in hisbackyard.
Erika (13:02):
Yeah, go ahead, who cares? Nobody's looking at him.
Edgar (13:05):
But if you're just gonna go out in public, you're just
gonna be a sore eye and thenit's just not ideal. And I feel
like he must have no shame oranything like that.
Erika (13:14):
Yeah, and I hate the fact that he keeps saying, But the
bikers wear shorts like that.Because they're biking! So
there's no excuse for him towear stuff like that. And if he
wants to wear shorts over it so,you know, they could hide like
blue shorts. Yeah.
Would you get offended if I toldyou you should dress better?
Edgar (13:33):
Not really, because I know I don't dress that well,
but I dress for comfort.
Erika (13:37):
I dress for comfort too though. I think we're both like
that. But I would never say thatyou dress, I think you dress
fine. You're always like preppyor dressy or sporty or mostly
like comfortable. I mean,whatever makes you happy.
So the top comment is there's atime and place for certain
clothes. For example, you canwear a bikini at the beach but
not in the mall. You can wear abikini at the beach but not
(14:00):
underwear, even if it's bettercoverage. Exactly. There's a
time and place like youmentioned earlier.
Edgar (14:08):
Yeah. Like, I like my shorts, like my very short
shorts, but I just wear it likewhen I'm going to sleep. Don't
go out with it.
Erika (14:17):
Your booty shorts? Basically, yeah. Actually, you
know what's funny? Oh my god.Hopefully my sisters don't kill
me for saying this but
Edgar (14:26):
One of them will, yeah.
Erika (14:28):
No no, it's not about them but it's about my dad. He
has these shorts that are likepretty short. He doesn't wear
them anymore though but he usedto for the longest time, it was
his favorite shorts. It was theAmerican flag. Oh, yeah.
And would wear them in thebackyard doing chores, doing
whatever, which is fine, butthen sometimes, you know, he
(14:51):
would be in a rush and he would,you know, pick me up with those
shorts or when I was in highschool, whatever. But I just
found it so funny and it's socute, but then they got too old
so he had to, you know, hedidn't wear them anymore. So
then, Breon, I don't know, wasit Breon? Somebody gave him for
Christmas the same shorts butthey were longer.
Edgar (15:10):
Oh yeah. That's funny. I can't remember the long one
then.
Erika (15:13):
Yeah, he hasn't worn them very often, but yeah, thought
that was really funny. We alllaughed because we can do his
shorts, his booty shorts, I callit.
Edgar (15:21):
It is just comfy,
Erika (15:22):
you know? Exactly, it's fine. Especially if you're doing
chores around the house, youknow?
Edgar (15:27):
Exactly, yeah. So final verdict?
Erika (15:29):
I would say she's not the asshole. He really needed a wake
up call there. Exactly. He needsto dress better.
Edgar (15:38):
Yeah, exactly. Him snapping is not helping anybody.
No. It's not even healthy forthe relationship because it's
such a fun issue.
Erika (15:46):
Yeah, I mean, it's not about she judging him or
anything like that. It's justabout respecting everybody's,
you know.
Edgar (15:53):
Not waiting everyone out. Yeah.
Erika (15:56):
Alright, the next story is, Am I the Asshole for Ruining
My Boyfriend's Family Dinner byBringing My Own Food. Based on
the title, it seems like she'san asshole, right?
Edgar (16:06):
Yeah, I'd say so.
Erika (16:07):
But let's see. I'm 28 years old and I have been with
my boyfriend for about a year. Ihave several food allergies,
gluten, dairy, shellfish. Myboyfriend's family invited me
over for a big homemade dinner.I told his mom ahead of time
that I have allergies.
They already know this, but Ireminded them because I've had a
(16:28):
couple incidents with thembecause of this. And she said,
Don't worry, we'll havesomething for you. When I got
there everything had at leastone ingredient I couldn't eat. I
didn't want to make a fuss or gohungry so I discreetly pulled
out a Tupperware meal and I madea home and started eating it. My
(16:49):
boyfriend mom looked offendedand said I was being
disrespectful and that I didn'ttrust her cooking.
Later my boyfriend told me Iembarrassed him and I should
have eaten around the allergensto keep the peace. What do you
think? She the asshole?
Edgar (17:02):
Yeah, no, OP isn't the asshole for looking after her
own health.
Erika (17:06):
Yeah, especially if she had other incidents where she
found what she's allergic to.
Edgar (17:12):
Yeah, it sounds like it's happened a few times. If it was
one time, I would be cautious,but I would still eat it because
mistakes happen. But if ithappened several times, they're
clearly not taking into accounttheir allergies.
Erika (17:27):
What do you think she could have done better in
communicating that she was notgoing to eat their food? Do you
think she should have saidsomething before she brought out
her tap one?
Edgar (17:36):
I guess you can always do things more tactfully, but like,
there isn't really like a niceway to say that I'm just going
to eat my own food for my safetyor because I prefer it. Because
you're going always take itwrong. You can say the most,
like, considerate phrases,you'll still think it's for that
reason, that you're justavoiding it because you don't
(17:59):
trust them or any of that stuff.
Erika (18:00):
I don't think there's a win situation at all for OP. I
think regardless of what shecould have said, I think, yeah,
same thing. I don't think themom would not be offended.
Edgar (18:10):
Yeah.
Erika (18:13):
Would you be offended if I did that?
Edgar (18:16):
Not really.
Erika (18:18):
Do you think you would feel embarrassed?
Edgar (18:20):
Myself? No.
Erika (18:23):
Would you understand me, right? I would think if I was in
the boyfriend's I'd say, I wouldbe understanding, especially if
she's allergic.
Edgar (18:32):
Yeah. I feel like for myself I wouldn't really care,
and I understand it. You'rehaving allergens and you just
want be extra careful, but Ifeel like people around us, like
your family and my family, ifany of us were to do that, they
may not be offended, but they'dhave questions, you know?
Erika (18:48):
Yeah, well, I think they might. I think everybody might
be offended regardless.
Edgar (18:53):
Yeah. Like, I wouldn't be surprised if they're all
offended.
Erika (18:57):
Yeah, they'll definitely be like, Yeah, but I mean, I
mean I get it. So the topcomment is, easy not the
asshole. They're offended thatyou're not giving yourself
allergic reactions. Yourboyfriend is a massive asshole
(19:21):
for suggesting you physicallysuffer just for his family's
approval. I mean, how can yousay that to eat around the
allergens?
Edgar (19:30):
Yeah, It's just, it's like when you have nuts and
stuff like that, like a nutallergy, kitchens will say this
space has nuts, so it's like awarning because it could cross
contaminate in that way. Exceptto eat around it, it's just like
not, like, doesn't make sense.
Erika (19:48):
Yeah, it's not really going to help anything. She's
still going to eat and give heran allergic reaction.
Edgar (19:53):
Yeah, and LP's boyfriend doesn't probably have allergens
to any food, so he doesn't knowhow bad it can get.
Erika (20:01):
Yeah, I don't think they nobody knows, or maybe they
don't understand maybe theseverity. Final verdict: do you
think she's an asshole?
Edgar (20:10):
OP, yeah no, OP isn't the asshole for pumping her own
food.
Erika (20:13):
Exactly, she's trying to protect her health there.
Edgar (20:17):
So this next story is titled, My Best Friend is
Pregnant. My best friend ofbasically my whole life just
found out she's pregnant. Shemoved in with me about a year
ago when her parents kicked herout. I lived alone and had an
extra bedroom. Since I'm nothome much, I told her she could
let her boyfriend stay tonightso she wouldn't be alone.
That turned into him being hereall the time and pretty much
(20:40):
also moving in. It was discussedthat she would help me pay my
bills before she moved in, andshe has helped pay a couple of
times for the majority of thebills. They buy their own food
and necessities and also pay forwifi, which I didn't have before
because I was struggling withmoney and didn't think it was
necessary. So, my question is,what now? When she told me she
(21:01):
was pregnant, I so badly wantedto be happy for her.
She said she thought she wasinfertile and it was a surprise
to her, but she had a positivepregnancy test a few months
earlier but lost it and theyhave been talking about having a
baby for a long time.Unfortunately, all I can think
about is are they going to raisea whole family in my house? My
(21:22):
grandfather gifted me this homeand we both worked hard to turn
it into what it is today. It wassupposed to be a place for me to
have my own family. I asked herwhat her plans are and she made
no mention of moving out.
I don't want her to think I'mbeing an asshole if I ask if
they're going to move out, butI'm also worried about the
financial burden and stress itcould potentially put on me. I
(21:43):
have taken precautions to delayhaving a baby of my own because
I know I can't afford one yet. Idon't know what to do. Do I
bring it up to them? If so, how?
And yeah, it's like prettycrazy.
Erika (21:54):
What's your advice?
Edgar (21:56):
Basically, she let his best friend crash into their
place, and they had a baby inhis own home. It was like, so
gross.
Erika (22:04):
I think she's too nice. OP is too nice. She needs to put
her foot down.
Edgar (22:11):
Exactly. Yeah. It's just not okay. It can be very
Erika (22:15):
They don't even pay her rent.
Edgar (22:17):
They pay it sometimes, but yeah. I I feel like their
plan only works and OP's friendsplan and whatever they have that
they expect to happen with thebaby is only working if they
don't pay rent, which is just sofinancially irresponsible.
Erika (22:33):
Yeah, I mean, they don't even have a place to live.
Edgar (22:36):
Yeah, don't have a place. They probably don't have the
money to do anything. They justbasically screw themselves and
they want to bring OP along withthem.
Erika (22:41):
Yeah, that's not fair for her. It's not their house and
paying for wifi and sometimesrent does not, well how they're
gonna pay for a baby.
Edgar (22:51):
Exactly, yeah. Because babies are like a few thousand
dollars, right? The hospital.
Erika (22:54):
A few thousand? Well, it depends if you have insurance.
Edgar (22:59):
Don't think they do.
Erika (23:00):
Yeah. It means it depends on your deductible. That's
insane. I think it's one ofthose things where she needs to
have a sit down with them andtalk to them straight. There's
no beating around the bush.
There's no, you know, it's nonnegotiable. Yeah. You need to
find somewhere to go and that'sit. You know, it kinda sucks to
(23:23):
be tough and be like, you're outa pregnant lady, but come on,
it's not your responsibility.Just because she's your best
friend doesn't mean she takesadvantage of you.
Edgar (23:31):
Exactly, yeah. Because if she keeps this on any longer,
it's gonna just be a suck forher because she's going have to
basically be the baby's nanny. Ican imagine them saying, Oh, can
you take care of the baby mostweekends?
Erika (23:44):
Yeah, that's insane.
Edgar (23:45):
And then having to pay for diapers and all that stuff.
And they're just going to keeptelling her to keep taking care
of their baby while they makemore babies. They should make it
worse off for Ophie.
Erika (23:54):
I'm afraid they're feel like her home is theirs.
Edgar (23:58):
Yeah, I know, basically. It is Imagine the Facebook post
with this baby, and they'll belike, We have our own happy
family, and then they have theOP's house in the background.
Erika (24:07):
It's insane. No. Think also having a baby is not just
having a baby. It means she'sgonna hear crying in the middle
of the night, she's gonna hearthere's gonna be messes
everywhere. It's just gonna beone of those things where it's
gonna be hard on her and it'snot fair that she has to go
through all that when it's nother responsibility.
Yeah. It's not
Edgar (24:28):
a child.
Erika (24:28):
Exactly. Would you have let it get this far?
Edgar (24:32):
No. Feel like
Erika (24:34):
When would you have stopped it in the story?
Edgar (24:37):
When the boyfriend sleeps over the first night. I'd be
like, Okay. I would've just sityou down and be like, No, you
cannot do anything in thishouse. There's actually cameras
all over, so by
Erika (24:48):
the way,
Edgar (24:48):
even if there isn't, I just want them to not be I don't
want them to be comfortableenough to do to make a whole
family in my house.
Erika (24:57):
But I was confused about the post because she's like, Oh,
she thought she was infertile,then she had a baby that she
lost before. Like, do you mean?Like, that's kind of
contradicting there.
Edgar (25:07):
So her best friend is also stupid and they're gonna
make stupid babies.
Erika (25:11):
I wouldn't say that. When you have a child, the child
Edgar (25:17):
is not at I mean, child is fault. Yes, it's not her
fault that she ended up in acrappy situation.
Erika (25:25):
She could have
Edgar (25:26):
have a crappy but she is gonna be half crappy parent, you
know?
Erika (25:30):
No, not always. I just think it just really depends.
But would you say she wouldlike, what advice would give her
besides just sitting down andtelling them?
Edgar (25:41):
To OP or?
Erika (25:42):
To OP, yeah.
Edgar (25:44):
Since I feel like she's probably scared to talk alone,
so probably bring in a few cops.Cops? And be like, Okay, I have
like three cops behind me.They're ready, stand by, so I'm
gonna ask you all politely topack your things. You have ten
minutes to pack out all yourthings.
Erika (26:01):
Oh yeah, didn't I expect you to say bring the cops in.
Told
Edgar (26:05):
them that you're not actually pregnant, it's fake, by
the way. Oh my gosh.
Erika (26:10):
I thought you were gonna say you're gonna bring up like
your friend or your mom orsomething to back you up. But
damn, cough.
Edgar (26:17):
I need muscles.
Erika (26:19):
Maybe my brother if I was if I was the girl in the
situation like the OP, I wouldhave my brother with me or you
know, obviously my fiance boyfrom whatever. So the top
comment is this is not going tobe easy conversation, but it has
to be done. Ask her about whather boyfriend is planning to do
with regards of getting her andhis baby a place to live.
(26:40):
Perhaps they are planningsomething, just ask point blank.
Exactly.
I think they got a little bittoo comfortable and they need to
go.
Edgar (26:48):
Exactly, yeah.
Erika (26:49):
Pretty much it.
Edgar (26:50):
I mean, it's not gonna be an easy conversation anyway, but
like
Erika (26:52):
No, she might lose her friendship, honestly.
Edgar (26:55):
Most likely, because I feel like they're banking on her
just being their rug andbasically de facto having the
house for themselves.
Erika (27:04):
Yeah, but they shouldn't have that, especially if it's
not theirs.
Edgar (27:09):
I can imagine him in few years down and be like, Hey, we
basically live here already andwe want to buy the house from
you. He has $500 Like somethingvery ridiculous like that. I can
see that in her future if shedoesn't put down now.
Erika (27:22):
Yeah, I feel like they're going to try to take her to
court to keep the house orsomething. I don't know, it's
just one of those things whereit's like people like that are
not really good to reason with.
Edgar (27:31):
Exactly.
Erika (27:31):
And she needs to, you know, before it gets to that
extreme she needs to dosomething. Especially before the
baby's born.
Edgar (27:38):
Yeah, so final verdict?
Erika (27:40):
I would, this one was advice needed. I would just say
to, you know, talk to them andthat's about it.
Edgar (27:46):
Okay, yeah. Yeah, my advice would be the same thing,
you just have to make the talk.
Erika (27:50):
Yeah, even though it's hard. So the next story is, Am I
the asshole for leaving myhusband after he refused to help
with our child? My 29 femalehusband, 30 male, and I have
been together for ten years andcurrently share one child of
three female. When our daughterwas born, I was working full
(28:11):
time in an office setting, butthen went on leave after
developing severe PPD. Werealized that we didn't need my
full income, so I stepped downto part time so we didn't have
to use daycare and to hopefullyrelieve some stress to ease my
depression.
I worked part time from the timeshe was six months old until
(28:31):
January 2025. During this time,I was responsible for the
household and our daughter. Myhusband's only real
responsibility was cookingdinner and occasional breakfast.
I cleaned, I did the groceryshopping, the meal planned, and
I remember all the appointmentsand events and also did all the
child rearing with the exceptionof two days I worked in the
(28:53):
office. I had one day from homebut my daughter was at home with
me.
I became more overwhelmed than Iwas before. I asked to help
constantly and my husband wouldfollow through for about two
weeks before telling me that heis too tired from working full
time forty hours. I told him Iwanted to go back to work full
(29:15):
time and split the workload. Hesaid no. I found a job anyways,
one where I'll be able to put mydaughter in a reputable daycare
for my remote days and still bebringing in more monthly than my
part time job.
It's important to note that theywere also renovating our entire
home due to hurricane damage andwe didn't have insurance so
extra income is needed. I toldmy husband about the job after
(29:38):
accepting the position. He wasfurious. He told me not to
expect any help outside of whathe does now cooking. He has
remained steadfast in hisdecision to not help.
I recently asked him again if atleast he could help brushing her
teeth in the morning. He saidno. I said we are supposed to be
a team and I would appreciatehis help. He snapped that this
(29:59):
is what I wanted. I did this tomyself and that he would not be
helping beyond his fair share.
I said fine, I'll figure outmyself. S has been contemplating
divorce. If only theresponsibility I need to pick up
is cooking, then what help do Ineed from him? Am I the hassle
for deciding that if he won'thelp, I won't stay?
Edgar (30:19):
No, I feel like if you are better off alone in that
kind of situation and eventhough it sucks, you should
maybe consider some way to getout of it, even if you have a
baby.
Erika (30:35):
Yeah, I think it's just being really unreasonable and
not flexible at all. I thinkparenting and workload and house
keeping is not just somethingthat is done and it's easy to
handle. There's gonna be timeswhere it's gonna be you doing
more or the other person doingmore And it's gonna have to be
(30:57):
something that you have toshare, not just, I'm just gonna
do this and nothing else. Andwhatever you do is up to you.
And what's the point of having arelationship like that, you know
what I mean?
So the top comment is not theasshole. Marriage and parenting
are supposed to be a teameffort. Not one person doing 95%
while the other one cooksdinner. You deserve real
(31:18):
support, not resentment forasking. So it's true, I mean,
she shouldn't be punished or sheshould be feeling guilty for
asking for help when it's hischild too, it's his household
too.
Just because he's working fortyhours, she is also working too.
And on top of that, she's doingtwo jobs basically because
(31:39):
taking care of a household and achild is a full time job. And
then having a part time withthat is also something that it
goes on top of that. It's noteasy. So the fact that he does
like, oh, whatever, I'm justdoing my forty hours is enough
for me.
That's it. I'm overwhelmed. Thenwhat about her? He's not taking
care of her. Clearly her husbanddoesn't really care that she's
(32:00):
trying to help him out withgetting the money because it
doesn't look like he has, he'sdoing extra.
Because I'm sure she would haveput something there that he's
trying to get, make more moneyto renovate the house. So, and
the fact that just because he'sused to her working, not working
(32:21):
and taking care of everything,doesn't mean that she's not
allowed to go back to work. Ithink everybody's entitled to
know, okay, I want to go back towork and then we should change
the dynamics around the house.What's the reasoning behind him
being so resistant with that?Because he's gonna have to help
around the house?
(32:42):
I don't get it. Like it's justone of those things where not
maybe for you the situation ofme working from home would be
great, but that's not alwaysgoing to be the sweet spot. It's
always going to stay like that.At one point or another I'm
going to maybe go back to workand you resisting like that
literally as such. It reallyshows how flexible you really
(33:03):
are and how you're not willingto put in the work either.
So what's the point of having apartner like that? Which I think
in this case if he doesn't, ifthey don't sit down and talk and
really talk it through, then Ithink the divorce is really the
only thing that could be withthis whole situation. Yeah, so
what's the final verdict?
Edgar (33:23):
No, she's not the asshole.
Erika (33:25):
I think, I agree, I think the husband is for being an
asshole and not helping her.
Edgar (33:31):
And then the final story is, am I the asshole for walking
out of dinner when myboyfriend's family insisted I
eat meat after four years ofbeing a vegetarian? I, 24
female, have been a vegetarianfor about four years now. It
started as an ethical choicebecause honestly it's just part
(33:51):
of who I am. My boyfriend(26mil) of two years knows this
and has always been superrespectful of my choice, even
though he's a meat eater. Lastweekend his parents invited us
over for dinner.
They're nice people, but kind oftraditional and have always made
little comments about my rabbitfood diet. Usually, I just laugh
(34:11):
it off. When he arrived, his momproudly announced she made her
famous beef stew. I politelysaid, I'd just eat the sides,
but she insisted there werebarely any meat chunks in her
beef stew and I could just eataround them. I reminded her I'm
a vegetarian and I don't eatanything with meat broth either.
(34:32):
That's when she got snippy andsaid, I spent hours making this
special meal and you're beingridiculous. It's just a little
beef broth. It won't kill you. Iwas getting uncomfortable, but
then my boyfriend's dad chimedin with, This generation is so
entitled to special diets. In myday, we ate what was put in
front of us and said thank you.
I was about to just awkwardlyeat some bread when my boyfriend
(34:54):
said nothing to defend me. So, Istood up and said, I respect
your home, but I also respect mychoices. I think I'll grab
something on the way home, and Iwalked out. My boyfriend
followed me and was pissed. SaidI embarrassed him that he
should've just eaten the damnstew this one time to keep the
peace.
His mom has been blowing up myphone saying I ruined dinner and
(35:16):
made her feel like a terriblehost. Because she I feel bad
about the awkwardness but alsothink they should respect my
dietary choices. Like, they knewI was a vegetarian for years. Am
I the asshole for walking out?
Erika (35:29):
No.
Edgar (35:32):
I mean, yeah. She's like, they all know that she just
doesn't eat meat at all. And Ifeel like if you're a vegetarian
for that long, eating meat islike your body has to get used
to it if you ever go back intoeating meat.
Erika (35:46):
Yeah, I think it's very unreasonable. I feel like OP did
the best and he didn't insultthem, he didn't say anything
rude, he just said, I'm justgonna go and eat them on my way
home. That's the best he couldhave done. I don't think he
should have stayed there at all,especially if there was so much
peer pressure on just eatingmeat or eating the beef too.
(36:08):
It's just one of those thingswhere you respect their choice.
Nobody should be forced to eatsomething that they don't want
to eat.
Edgar (36:16):
I was a pretty rage dig for this. Even the mom saying
let's just eat this. What wasthe point of this meal or this
dinner? Just to get thevegetarian to eat meat because
for whatever weird reason theyhave.
Erika (36:31):
Yeah, I don't get it. I mean, if they knew that other
person or P was a vegetarian,What did they expect?
Edgar (36:39):
I know, yeah. It's
Erika (36:41):
not new, it's been years.
Edgar (36:44):
Like imagine you told me you don't like fish, then I told
my parents they cook you fish.Like, What am I going to expect
from that kind of dinner? You'reobviously not going to eat or
you're not going to like thefood.
Erika (36:56):
Exactly. Well, I'm probably not going to eat it.
Edgar (36:58):
Exactly, yeah. And then it would be ridiculous for me
and my family to be upset aboutit.
Erika (37:04):
Yeah, I mean
Edgar (37:05):
It's just the same principles apply to this.
Erika (37:08):
Yeah, especially if you're allergic. I feel like we
kind of had a lot of food ones.The other one was food one for
allergy. I think it's just oneof those things where if you
don't want to eat it, no oneshould be forced to eat it. No
matter if it's gonna be, Iwouldn't say everybody has
entitlement for that.
I think, you know, just sayingthank you and maybe saying I'll
take it to go or whatever orsomething like that is fine too.
(37:30):
But I think it's just one ofthose things where everybody
should have their opinion. Thetop comment is vegetarian forty
five years and more. This is anold story, nothing new here. She
does not respect boundaries.
My sister-in-law would use alittle fat for flavor. This
meant my husband and I just didnot eat it. We never wavered.
(37:52):
She would keep pushing. She knewshe was having you over for
dinner and she tried to coerceyou into eating it.
This is a total lack of respectof who you are. I have people
with all kinds of dietaryrestrictions. I just make
burradi and tell everyone whatthe restricted ingredients are
and which dish. I too have toeat around others cooking. I
don't get weird and I don'texpect anyone else to either.
(38:15):
I'm just grateful that there isso much more choice than there
was in the 70s.
Edgar (38:20):
Yeah, basically. It's just like a weird kind of dinner
because they knew she was avegetarian and then they still
wanted her to eat the meat thatthey obviously made it to be as
meaty as possible.
Erika (38:33):
Like a beef stew, yeah.
Edgar (38:35):
Beef stew, beef broth. There's not even that meaty eat
around exactly. It's ridiculous.
Erika (38:39):
It's just one of those things where also you see a lot
more allergens right now, likegluten or you know, yeast or
whatever. It's just a lot ofthings that where you see a lot
of people getting allergic to,lot of most stuff that people
probably were back then butdidn't know. But we have the
technology now to know. And so,you know, it's not anybody's
fault for not wanting to eatsomething.
Edgar (39:00):
Exactly, yeah. So final verdict?
Erika (39:04):
I would say no, not the asshole. The boyfriend's family
was an asshole. I think he needsa new boyfriend because he
didn't she or he didn't, youknow, stood up for her.
Edgar (39:15):
I feel like he was in on it too.
Erika (39:17):
I think so. It's like oh we're gonna break him or her
today, like OP today, you know?I don't know. It's just one of
those things where you kind ofsee situations like this, you
see your significant other andwho they really are, especially
when it comes to family. And Iwould say break up with his ass.
He don't deserve your OP. That'sall the stories we have today.
Thank you for tuning into thisweek's episode. Check out our
(39:38):
website, www.yappings.com andjoin our mail list for updates.
If you love our podcast and wantto support us, subscribe and
share to your friends andfamily, we would appreciate this
so much.
Edgar (39:50):
Also, we have a Facebook group called AITA Relationship
and Family Drama linked in thedescription. Join us so you can
share any mighty asshole postsyou like or share your own
stories for us all to judge. Wemay even read a few posts in one
of our episodes if you're lucky.
Erika (40:06):
Thank you, bye!
Yapping!
Erika (00:02):
Hello, this is Erika.
Edgar (00:04):
And Edgar.
Erika (00:05):
And we are the Yapping Snowsers. We entertain you with
Yap worthy stories we findaround the web. Today's theme is
unfair expectations. The firststory is, am I the asshole for
telling my brother's wife tostop whining about how it is not
fair that I gave the family thefirst grandkid? Hello everyone,
(00:27):
I'm 29 female and my husbandthirty male.
I respecting twins. Oh my God,twins. I'm pretty close to my
husband's family while I'm notso close with my family. My mom
always wanted three boys, butshe had me after two brothers,
30 male and 32 male. Sometimes Italk to N because he and my
(00:47):
husband like to frequent thesame gym.
So they sometimes talk at thegym. My other brother isn't the
best. He bullied me when I was akid because of my asthma and the
fact that I am on the spectrum.I didn't invite him or his wife
to my wedding because of how hetreated me while I grew up. My
mom said she wouldn't come butmy dad told her to stop playing
favorites and she stayed quietduring the wedding.
(01:09):
Now my brother's wife alwayswants to be the center of
attention. She was always sayinghow she and my brother was the
first ones to get married andshe wanted to have a baby when
they went to their honeymoon sotheir baby could be the first
grandkid. Well, she still isn'tpregnant and they have been
together for four years.Recently I found out me and my
(01:30):
hubby are expecting with twins.This will be the first set of
twins and grandkids in thefamily.
And she went ballistic. Sheyelled, screamed, throwed
things, told me that I'm selfishfor not waiting for her to have
a baby and that everythingshould be about her, not the
(01:50):
unwanted girl. She screamed andI took her chance of being the
first girl of the family andother crazy things. I told her
to shut up and stop acting likeshe was special because she was
not. And that it's not my faultthat she still isn't pregnant.
She called my husband some slursbecause he is black and I just
punched her right in the face.My dad and husband took me away
(02:11):
from her and she started cryingsaying, I don't deserve kids. My
mom told me that I should havebeen the bigger person and
ignore her. But how could Iignore her when she called my
husband and raised his slur? Tis saying that he will press
charges on me for attacking hiswife and that I'll lose custody
of my kids.
Please. I'm afraid of losing mybabies because of that. I'm not
(02:33):
a violent person. I don't knowwhat got into me to hit her, but
my husband said I was a baddieand not a fault, but I'm still
doubting myself. So read it, amI the asshole?
Edgar (02:47):
It just kinda screams like a trashy family, but So,
Opie's just so it's just likeit's just crazy, like, to want
the world to stop for her tohave, like, her first child, but
it's been, like, four years.
Erika (02:59):
Four years!
Edgar (03:00):
At that point, yeah, like, she lost her hands.
Erika (03:02):
She's either
Edgar (03:03):
not trying or not trying hard enough.
Erika (03:06):
Maybe somebody's infertile or they're having
trouble with conceiving, whichis, you know, everybody's
different, is, you know, it's astruggle and maybe she had a
mental breakdown, but come on.
Edgar (03:17):
Yeah, but at the same time, it's not about like, it
doesn't mean that that familydoesn't have a kid anymore or
shouldn't have a kid anymore.
Erika (03:26):
I know. I'm not excusing or I'm not trying to defend her,
I'm just saying you know maybethat's the reason why. But
however her attitude andthrowing stuff, yeah I don't
understand where she's reallycoming from. Her opinion and the
reason that she became the firstperson to have kids doesn't
change anything. I think sheneeds some, maybe a therapy or
(03:49):
something for anger issuesbecause it's not happening.
Edgar (03:53):
Yeah, that's very rational. And then also, they
want to get OP's kids taken awayfrom her over it.
Erika (03:58):
That's unrealistic.
Edgar (03:59):
It's very. It's just pettiness. They just want the
kids to be gone so they canclaim, Oh, okay, basically,
technically, you have no kids.So there's no first kids yet
from this family.
Erika (04:09):
I don't get the raven, like who wants to be first or
who wants to, like I don'tunderstand. You shouldn't give
birth to a kid just because youwant to be the first of the
family to have a kid. That's notthe reason to have kids, that's
crazy to me. The mentality is alittle bit off.
Edgar (04:26):
It's a very me centric kind of
Erika (04:28):
How would you have reacted if somebody called me a
racist slur?
Edgar (04:34):
I would say it back to them. You gotta always one them
up. I'll make their jaws drop.Oh my gosh. I'll invent a new
one.
Erika (04:49):
My gosh.
Edgar (04:50):
Who are you?
Erika (04:54):
I don't know. I've never had a situation like that, so I
don't know how I would react. Italso depends like what word they
used. Like, you know, if it'sextremely offensive, I would
definitely say something. Yeah.
But if it's something, like,stupid, I'd be like, alright,
child, you know?
Edgar (05:13):
Mhmm. I remember when I was in, like, this was towards
the end of college, but I waswalking back from the grocery
and all of sudden someone pushedme while I was walking. Like,
was in New York City, too. Andthey pushed me and then I went
to terms and they were like,Hey, just put their groceries
down and they were like, Go backto the border. But the thing
(05:34):
was, they were also Mexican.
What? They were short Mexican.Maybe more than they looked more
Mexican than I was.
Erika (05:41):
You do not look Mexican, though.
Edgar (05:42):
Well, they look more Spanish.
Erika (05:44):
That is crazy.
Edgar (05:45):
I was like, And then I was gonna like, I felt like
fighting, I guess. But then theyput out a chain.
Erika (05:53):
Okay. You don't
Edgar (05:54):
want mess with It's like, I don't have anything. All I
have is my groceries and I'm notrooting that over, like, some
comment.
Erika (06:00):
Yeah, definitely. Actually, now that you say that,
I think New York is such adiversital place that you see a
lot of people and encounter alot of people that really, know,
assholes. I remember one time wewere my whole family went to New
York and we were in a bus, Ibelieve or we were in oh, we
were not in the bus. We were inSubway. And we were all sitting
(06:23):
down and then this lady shewould had to be at least like
three hundred pounds.
And she was walk? Yes, she couldwalk.
Edgar (06:31):
She
Erika (06:31):
was very slow, but she could walk. And she sat in the
back and I don't know if Hectorjust because he was looking
around just like any normalperson would do. Not looking at
her directly, but she felt likehe was looking at her like
giving him beady eyes like,judging look. But he he was he
wasn't. And so that lady wentoff on him.
(06:54):
Called all of us like like justeverything name you could think
of of racist, she said it.
Edgar (07:01):
You're crazy.
Erika (07:02):
And we were just like, what? What just happened? We
were so in shock. And then Ithink after she left, nobody
said anything, but everybody wasgiving her dirty looks like
everybody else. Mhmm.
We we didn't wanna I thinkHector said something about
like, yeah, that's not myintention or something like
that. But she just didn't careuntil she finally left. And
(07:22):
everybody else was like, oh, youknow, we apologize for what she
did. Like she had no right.Like, maybe she's not mentally
stable.
Like it was just crazy.Everybody was just like you
could hear a pin drop in thetrain. Because it was just
insane. I just couldn't believeit. And like after that, that's
the only racist situation I wasYeah.
(07:45):
Do you think she went too far bypunching her in the face?
Edgar (07:48):
Yeah, just because once you do violence, just like, it
always gets very legal at thatpoint and then people can call
the cops or all that stuff. Andeven if it's like self defense,
like in most cases in worsestates, you still get in
trouble. I'm not like a lawyer,I'm not sure what would be like
the verdict in this case interms of like, oh, she kind of
(08:08):
offended me first so I hit herback.' Well, was throwing stuff
so you could
Erika (08:12):
also get that as assault, know what I mean?
Edgar (08:14):
Yeah, but it just becomes very legally sticky at that
point because there's so manyvariables you have to just
document and fight it through.So, think it wasn't really worth
it to throw a punch if like,you're just gonna get more in
trouble. Then now they have likethis whole legal thing with
their kids too. Like all ittakes is like one crazy person.
Yeah.
Like, to like escalate it.
Erika (08:36):
Yeah. I mean, I think everybody has a breaking point,
honestly.
Edgar (08:39):
I
Erika (08:40):
mean, it's up to you how you would react. Either you're
gonna, you know, use violence oryou're just gonna walk away.
It's just one of those thingswhere it's fight or fight or
fight, you know?
Edgar (08:50):
Fight or flight, yeah.
Erika (08:51):
Yeah. Fight or flight. So the top comment is not the
asshole at all. Sometimes peoplejust push you too far and it's
understandable to snap. Itdoesn't mean you're a bad person
or unfit to handle things.
Everyone has their limits andit's important to stand up for
yourself when necessary. But no,definitely not losing custody
over standing up for yourself ina tough situation. Yeah, think
(09:15):
legally they could take away thekids just for this, but I mean,
Edgar (09:18):
Yeah, can try, but there's no danger to the kids.
This is just like an unrelentingincident. And I doubt that OP's
sister-in-law was like gravelyinjured from this, so.
Erika (09:32):
Yeah, I mean, yeah. I think it's just out context
here. I think he definitely Imean, I don't think she's a bad
person. She feels bad like also,you know. It's just they pushed
her too far.
Edgar (09:46):
To the final verdict?
Erika (09:48):
No, don't think she's an asshole. The brother and the
sister-in-law is kind ofunhinged. They need some type of
help, mental health orsomething, mental help.
Edgar (09:58):
Yeah, definitely hoping he's in the asshole, I wouldn't
have punched because that justmakes it more difficult
Erika (10:03):
for Yeah, definitely not. I don't agree with violence.
Edgar (10:06):
I don't think she's going get in trouble, but still, she's
still going to have to gothrough that entire situation.
And it's like not pleasant. So,the next story is titled, Am I
the asshole for refusing to goout with my husband because of
the way he dresses? I, 40female, have been getting into
arguments lately with myhusband, forty eight male, about
how he dresses around ourneighborhood. He often goes for
(10:28):
walks together, but recently hestarted wearing skin tight
compression leggings.
Men usually wear these or shortsover them, but he just wants to
wear them alone. You can seeeverything. We live in the
Southern United States in aconservative area and I just
don't feel like it'sappropriate. He says he doesn't
care what other people think,but I feel like it's just
inconsiderate of our neighbors.Tonight he put on a pair of
(10:52):
compression type shorts and theyliterally look like underwear.
They're cotton, not spandex bythe way. I refused to go out
with him like that and he blewup at me. He said that bikers
wear shorts like that all thetime, so why can't he? I tried
to explain that it's differenthere in the neighborhood and
that people would be weird anduncomfortable with him dressing
like that with their kidsrunning around. I do feel crazy,
(11:15):
but he's not from The UnitedStates, and I often feel like,
okay, that explains a lot.
And I often feel like he has acomplete disregard for
respecting other people in thename of doing what he wants.
He's from a country that haseven more social pressures and
expectations, and I'm alwaysvery careful how I dress and
behave when we visit. I don'tknow, am I just being a prude?
(11:35):
So, Reddit, am I the asshole? I
Erika (11:39):
don't think she's being a prude. I think she's valid for
her well, I would sayrecommendations of him wearing
that. I mean, think it's veryuncomfortable.
Edgar (11:49):
Mhmm.
Erika (11:50):
I mean, no parent wants to have somebody walking around
with tight shorts that you couldsee everything.
Edgar (11:58):
I know, it's pretty weird. I would put him on a
list. On a few lists actuallyfor her, for that behavior.
Erika (12:06):
Do you think there was a nice way to say, you know, not
to wear that? Or do you thinkshe kind of
Edgar (12:12):
He doesn't deserve a nice way to tell him to put on some
clothes. Like, it's just weird.I mean, I I'm gonna be very
biased here and say that when Iread that he wasn't from The
United States, it kind of madesense to me.
Erika (12:25):
But then she said that he's from a place in the country
where they even have morepressures and expectations.
Edgar (12:31):
So he's probably hiding something, you know? He's just
now that he's in a place wherehe could be more open, he's just
letting it out and just doesn'tcare.
Erika (12:39):
I don't know.
Edgar (12:40):
Actually By before he was compressed and now he can just
go free.
Erika (12:45):
I don't understand here. Think he just needs to respect
others. I mean, I understandeverybody has a free rein with
clothing or representingyourself, whatever, but there's
children, come on.
Edgar (12:57):
Yeah, just like a time and place. Like, if he wants to
wear his spandex in hisbackyard.
Erika (13:02):
Yeah, go ahead, who cares? Nobody's looking at him.
Edgar (13:05):
But if you're just gonna go out in public, you're just
gonna be a sore eye and thenit's just not ideal. And I feel
like he must have no shame oranything like that.
Erika (13:14):
Yeah, and I hate the fact that he keeps saying, But the
bikers wear shorts like that.Because they're biking! So
there's no excuse for him towear stuff like that. And if he
wants to wear shorts over it so,you know, they could hide like
blue shorts. Yeah.
Would you get offended if I toldyou you should dress better?
Edgar (13:33):
Not really, because I know I don't dress that well,
but I dress for comfort.
Erika (13:37):
I dress for comfort too though. I think we're both like
that. But I would never say thatyou dress, I think you dress
fine. You're always like preppyor dressy or sporty or mostly
like comfortable. I mean,whatever makes you happy.
So the top comment is there's atime and place for certain
clothes. For example, you canwear a bikini at the beach but
not in the mall. You can wear abikini at the beach but not
(14:00):
underwear, even if it's bettercoverage. Exactly. There's a
time and place like youmentioned earlier.
Edgar (14:08):
Yeah. Like, I like my shorts, like my very short
shorts, but I just wear it likewhen I'm going to sleep. Don't
go out with it.
Erika (14:17):
Your booty shorts? Basically, yeah. Actually, you
know what's funny? Oh my god.Hopefully my sisters don't kill
me for saying this but
Edgar (14:26):
One of them will, yeah.
Erika (14:28):
No no, it's not about them but it's about my dad. He
has these shorts that are likepretty short. He doesn't wear
them anymore though but he usedto for the longest time, it was
his favorite shorts. It was theAmerican flag. Oh, yeah.
And would wear them in thebackyard doing chores, doing
whatever, which is fine, butthen sometimes, you know, he
(14:51):
would be in a rush and he would,you know, pick me up with those
shorts or when I was in highschool, whatever. But I just
found it so funny and it's socute, but then they got too old
so he had to, you know, hedidn't wear them anymore. So
then, Breon, I don't know, wasit Breon? Somebody gave him for
Christmas the same shorts butthey were longer.
Edgar (15:10):
Oh yeah. That's funny. I can't remember the long one
then.
Erika (15:13):
Yeah, he hasn't worn them very often, but yeah, thought
that was really funny. We alllaughed because we can do his
shorts, his booty shorts, I callit.
Edgar (15:21):
It is just comfy,
Erika (15:22):
you know? Exactly, it's fine. Especially if you're doing
chores around the house, youknow?
Edgar (15:27):
Exactly, yeah. So final verdict?
Erika (15:29):
I would say she's not the asshole. He really needed a wake
up call there. Exactly. He needsto dress better.
Edgar (15:38):
Yeah, exactly. Him snapping is not helping anybody.
No. It's not even healthy forthe relationship because it's
such a fun issue.
Erika (15:46):
Yeah, I mean, it's not about she judging him or
anything like that. It's justabout respecting everybody's,
you know.
Edgar (15:53):
Not waiting everyone out. Yeah.
Erika (15:56):
Alright, the next story is, Am I the Asshole for Ruining
My Boyfriend's Family Dinner byBringing My Own Food. Based on
the title, it seems like she'san asshole, right?
Edgar (16:06):
Yeah, I'd say so.
Erika (16:07):
But let's see. I'm 28 years old and I have been with
my boyfriend for about a year. Ihave several food allergies,
gluten, dairy, shellfish. Myboyfriend's family invited me
over for a big homemade dinner.I told his mom ahead of time
that I have allergies.
They already know this, but Ireminded them because I've had a
(16:28):
couple incidents with thembecause of this. And she said,
Don't worry, we'll havesomething for you. When I got
there everything had at leastone ingredient I couldn't eat. I
didn't want to make a fuss or gohungry so I discreetly pulled
out a Tupperware meal and I madea home and started eating it. My
(16:49):
boyfriend mom looked offendedand said I was being
disrespectful and that I didn'ttrust her cooking.
Later my boyfriend told me Iembarrassed him and I should
have eaten around the allergensto keep the peace. What do you
think? She the asshole?
Edgar (17:02):
Yeah, no, OP isn't the asshole for looking after her
own health.
Erika (17:06):
Yeah, especially if she had other incidents where she
found what she's allergic to.
Edgar (17:12):
Yeah, it sounds like it's happened a few times. If it was
one time, I would be cautious,but I would still eat it because
mistakes happen. But if ithappened several times, they're
clearly not taking into accounttheir allergies.
Erika (17:27):
What do you think she could have done better in
communicating that she was notgoing to eat their food? Do you
think she should have saidsomething before she brought out
her tap one?
Edgar (17:36):
I guess you can always do things more tactfully, but like,
there isn't really like a niceway to say that I'm just going
to eat my own food for my safetyor because I prefer it. Because
you're going always take itwrong. You can say the most,
like, considerate phrases,you'll still think it's for that
reason, that you're justavoiding it because you don't
(17:59):
trust them or any of that stuff.
Erika (18:00):
I don't think there's a win situation at all for OP. I
think regardless of what shecould have said, I think, yeah,
same thing. I don't think themom would not be offended.
Edgar (18:10):
Yeah.
Erika (18:13):
Would you be offended if I did that?
Edgar (18:16):
Not really.
Erika (18:18):
Do you think you would feel embarrassed?
Edgar (18:20):
Myself? No.
Erika (18:23):
Would you understand me, right? I would think if I was in
the boyfriend's I'd say, I wouldbe understanding, especially if
she's allergic.
Edgar (18:32):
Yeah. I feel like for myself I wouldn't really care,
and I understand it. You'rehaving allergens and you just
want be extra careful, but Ifeel like people around us, like
your family and my family, ifany of us were to do that, they
may not be offended, but they'dhave questions, you know?
Erika (18:48):
Yeah, well, I think they might. I think everybody might
be offended regardless.
Edgar (18:53):
Yeah. Like, I wouldn't be surprised if they're all
offended.
Erika (18:57):
Yeah, they'll definitely be like, Yeah, but I mean, I
mean I get it. So the topcomment is, easy not the
asshole. They're offended thatyou're not giving yourself
allergic reactions. Yourboyfriend is a massive asshole
(19:21):
for suggesting you physicallysuffer just for his family's
approval. I mean, how can yousay that to eat around the
allergens?
Edgar (19:30):
Yeah, It's just, it's like when you have nuts and
stuff like that, like a nutallergy, kitchens will say this
space has nuts, so it's like awarning because it could cross
contaminate in that way. Exceptto eat around it, it's just like
not, like, doesn't make sense.
Erika (19:48):
Yeah, it's not really going to help anything. She's
still going to eat and give heran allergic reaction.
Edgar (19:53):
Yeah, and LP's boyfriend doesn't probably have allergens
to any food, so he doesn't knowhow bad it can get.
Erika (20:01):
Yeah, I don't think they nobody knows, or maybe they
don't understand maybe theseverity. Final verdict: do you
think she's an asshole?
Edgar (20:10):
OP, yeah no, OP isn't the asshole for pumping her own
food.
Erika (20:13):
Exactly, she's trying to protect her health there.
Edgar (20:17):
So this next story is titled, My Best Friend is
Pregnant. My best friend ofbasically my whole life just
found out she's pregnant. Shemoved in with me about a year
ago when her parents kicked herout. I lived alone and had an
extra bedroom. Since I'm nothome much, I told her she could
let her boyfriend stay tonightso she wouldn't be alone.
That turned into him being hereall the time and pretty much
(20:40):
also moving in. It was discussedthat she would help me pay my
bills before she moved in, andshe has helped pay a couple of
times for the majority of thebills. They buy their own food
and necessities and also pay forwifi, which I didn't have before
because I was struggling withmoney and didn't think it was
necessary. So, my question is,what now? When she told me she
(21:01):
was pregnant, I so badly wantedto be happy for her.
She said she thought she wasinfertile and it was a surprise
to her, but she had a positivepregnancy test a few months
earlier but lost it and theyhave been talking about having a
baby for a long time.Unfortunately, all I can think
about is are they going to raisea whole family in my house? My
(21:22):
grandfather gifted me this homeand we both worked hard to turn
it into what it is today. It wassupposed to be a place for me to
have my own family. I asked herwhat her plans are and she made
no mention of moving out.
I don't want her to think I'mbeing an asshole if I ask if
they're going to move out, butI'm also worried about the
financial burden and stress itcould potentially put on me. I
(21:43):
have taken precautions to delayhaving a baby of my own because
I know I can't afford one yet. Idon't know what to do. Do I
bring it up to them? If so, how?
And yeah, it's like prettycrazy.
Erika (21:54):
What's your advice?
Edgar (21:56):
Basically, she let his best friend crash into their
place, and they had a baby inhis own home. It was like, so
gross.
Erika (22:04):
I think she's too nice. OP is too nice. She needs to put
her foot down.
Edgar (22:11):
Exactly. Yeah. It's just not okay. It can be very
Erika (22:15):
They don't even pay her rent.
Edgar (22:17):
They pay it sometimes, but yeah. I I feel like their
plan only works and OP's friendsplan and whatever they have that
they expect to happen with thebaby is only working if they
don't pay rent, which is just sofinancially irresponsible.
Erika (22:33):
Yeah, I mean, they don't even have a place to live.
Edgar (22:36):
Yeah, don't have a place. They probably don't have the
money to do anything. They justbasically screw themselves and
they want to bring OP along withthem.
Erika (22:41):
Yeah, that's not fair for her. It's not their house and
paying for wifi and sometimesrent does not, well how they're
gonna pay for a baby.
Edgar (22:51):
Exactly, yeah. Because babies are like a few thousand
dollars, right? The hospital.
Erika (22:54):
A few thousand? Well, it depends if you have insurance.
Edgar (22:59):
Don't think they do.
Erika (23:00):
Yeah. It means it depends on your deductible. That's
insane. I think it's one ofthose things where she needs to
have a sit down with them andtalk to them straight. There's
no beating around the bush.
There's no, you know, it's nonnegotiable. Yeah. You need to
find somewhere to go and that'sit. You know, it kinda sucks to
(23:23):
be tough and be like, you're outa pregnant lady, but come on,
it's not your responsibility.Just because she's your best
friend doesn't mean she takesadvantage of you.
Edgar (23:31):
Exactly, yeah. Because if she keeps this on any longer,
it's gonna just be a suck forher because she's going have to
basically be the baby's nanny. Ican imagine them saying, Oh, can
you take care of the baby mostweekends?
Erika (23:44):
Yeah, that's insane.
Edgar (23:45):
And then having to pay for diapers and all that stuff.
And they're just going to keeptelling her to keep taking care
of their baby while they makemore babies. They should make it
worse off for Ophie.
Erika (23:54):
I'm afraid they're feel like her home is theirs.
Edgar (23:58):
Yeah, I know, basically. It is Imagine the Facebook post
with this baby, and they'll belike, We have our own happy
family, and then they have theOP's house in the background.
Erika (24:07):
It's insane. No. Think also having a baby is not just
having a baby. It means she'sgonna hear crying in the middle
of the night, she's gonna hearthere's gonna be messes
everywhere. It's just gonna beone of those things where it's
gonna be hard on her and it'snot fair that she has to go
through all that when it's nother responsibility.
Yeah. It's not
Edgar (24:28):
a child.
Erika (24:28):
Exactly. Would you have let it get this far?
Edgar (24:32):
No. Feel like
Erika (24:34):
When would you have stopped it in the story?
Edgar (24:37):
When the boyfriend sleeps over the first night. I'd be
like, Okay. I would've just sityou down and be like, No, you
cannot do anything in thishouse. There's actually cameras
all over, so by
Erika (24:48):
the way,
Edgar (24:48):
even if there isn't, I just want them to not be I don't
want them to be comfortableenough to do to make a whole
family in my house.
Erika (24:57):
But I was confused about the post because she's like, Oh,
she thought she was infertile,then she had a baby that she
lost before. Like, do you mean?Like, that's kind of
contradicting there.
Edgar (25:07):
So her best friend is also stupid and they're gonna
make stupid babies.
Erika (25:11):
I wouldn't say that. When you have a child, the child
Edgar (25:17):
is not at I mean, child is fault. Yes, it's not her
fault that she ended up in acrappy situation.
Erika (25:25):
She could have
Edgar (25:26):
have a crappy but she is gonna be half crappy parent, you
know?
Erika (25:30):
No, not always. I just think it just really depends.
But would you say she wouldlike, what advice would give her
besides just sitting down andtelling them?
Edgar (25:41):
To OP or?
Erika (25:42):
To OP, yeah.
Edgar (25:44):
Since I feel like she's probably scared to talk alone,
so probably bring in a few cops.Cops? And be like, Okay, I have
like three cops behind me.They're ready, stand by, so I'm
gonna ask you all politely topack your things. You have ten
minutes to pack out all yourthings.
Erika (26:01):
Oh yeah, didn't I expect you to say bring the cops in.
Told
Edgar (26:05):
them that you're not actually pregnant, it's fake, by
the way. Oh my gosh.
Erika (26:10):
I thought you were gonna say you're gonna bring up like
your friend or your mom orsomething to back you up. But
damn, cough.
Edgar (26:17):
I need muscles.
Erika (26:19):
Maybe my brother if I was if I was the girl in the
situation like the OP, I wouldhave my brother with me or you
know, obviously my fiance boyfrom whatever. So the top
comment is this is not going tobe easy conversation, but it has
to be done. Ask her about whather boyfriend is planning to do
with regards of getting her andhis baby a place to live.
(26:40):
Perhaps they are planningsomething, just ask point blank.
Exactly.
I think they got a little bittoo comfortable and they need to
go.
Edgar (26:48):
Exactly, yeah.
Erika (26:49):
Pretty much it.
Edgar (26:50):
I mean, it's not gonna be an easy conversation anyway, but
like
Erika (26:52):
No, she might lose her friendship, honestly.
Edgar (26:55):
Most likely, because I feel like they're banking on her
just being their rug andbasically de facto having the
house for themselves.
Erika (27:04):
Yeah, but they shouldn't have that, especially if it's
not theirs.
Edgar (27:09):
I can imagine him in few years down and be like, Hey, we
basically live here already andwe want to buy the house from
you. He has $500 Like somethingvery ridiculous like that. I can
see that in her future if shedoesn't put down now.
Erika (27:22):
Yeah, I feel like they're going to try to take her to
court to keep the house orsomething. I don't know, it's
just one of those things whereit's like people like that are
not really good to reason with.
Edgar (27:31):
Exactly.
Erika (27:31):
And she needs to, you know, before it gets to that
extreme she needs to dosomething. Especially before the
baby's born.
Edgar (27:38):
Yeah, so final verdict?
Erika (27:40):
I would, this one was advice needed. I would just say
to, you know, talk to them andthat's about it.
Edgar (27:46):
Okay, yeah. Yeah, my advice would be the same thing,
you just have to make the talk.
Erika (27:50):
Yeah, even though it's hard. So the next story is, Am I
the asshole for leaving myhusband after he refused to help
with our child? My 29 femalehusband, 30 male, and I have
been together for ten years andcurrently share one child of
three female. When our daughterwas born, I was working full
(28:11):
time in an office setting, butthen went on leave after
developing severe PPD. Werealized that we didn't need my
full income, so I stepped downto part time so we didn't have
to use daycare and to hopefullyrelieve some stress to ease my
depression.
I worked part time from the timeshe was six months old until
(28:31):
January 2025. During this time,I was responsible for the
household and our daughter. Myhusband's only real
responsibility was cookingdinner and occasional breakfast.
I cleaned, I did the groceryshopping, the meal planned, and
I remember all the appointmentsand events and also did all the
child rearing with the exceptionof two days I worked in the
(28:53):
office. I had one day from homebut my daughter was at home with
me.
I became more overwhelmed than Iwas before. I asked to help
constantly and my husband wouldfollow through for about two
weeks before telling me that heis too tired from working full
time forty hours. I told him Iwanted to go back to work full
(29:15):
time and split the workload. Hesaid no. I found a job anyways,
one where I'll be able to put mydaughter in a reputable daycare
for my remote days and still bebringing in more monthly than my
part time job.
It's important to note that theywere also renovating our entire
home due to hurricane damage andwe didn't have insurance so
extra income is needed. I toldmy husband about the job after
(29:38):
accepting the position. He wasfurious. He told me not to
expect any help outside of whathe does now cooking. He has
remained steadfast in hisdecision to not help.
I recently asked him again if atleast he could help brushing her
teeth in the morning. He saidno. I said we are supposed to be
a team and I would appreciatehis help. He snapped that this
(29:59):
is what I wanted. I did this tomyself and that he would not be
helping beyond his fair share.
I said fine, I'll figure outmyself. S has been contemplating
divorce. If only theresponsibility I need to pick up
is cooking, then what help do Ineed from him? Am I the hassle
for deciding that if he won'thelp, I won't stay?
Edgar (30:19):
No, I feel like if you are better off alone in that
kind of situation and eventhough it sucks, you should
maybe consider some way to getout of it, even if you have a
baby.
Erika (30:35):
Yeah, I think it's just being really unreasonable and
not flexible at all. I thinkparenting and workload and house
keeping is not just somethingthat is done and it's easy to
handle. There's gonna be timeswhere it's gonna be you doing
more or the other person doingmore And it's gonna have to be
(30:57):
something that you have toshare, not just, I'm just gonna
do this and nothing else. Andwhatever you do is up to you.
And what's the point of having arelationship like that, you know
what I mean?
So the top comment is not theasshole. Marriage and parenting
are supposed to be a teameffort. Not one person doing 95%
while the other one cooksdinner. You deserve real
(31:18):
support, not resentment forasking. So it's true, I mean,
she shouldn't be punished or sheshould be feeling guilty for
asking for help when it's hischild too, it's his household
too.
Just because he's working fortyhours, she is also working too.
And on top of that, she's doingtwo jobs basically because
(31:39):
taking care of a household and achild is a full time job. And
then having a part time withthat is also something that it
goes on top of that. It's noteasy. So the fact that he does
like, oh, whatever, I'm justdoing my forty hours is enough
for me.
That's it. I'm overwhelmed. Thenwhat about her? He's not taking
care of her. Clearly her husbanddoesn't really care that she's
(32:00):
trying to help him out withgetting the money because it
doesn't look like he has, he'sdoing extra.
Because I'm sure she would haveput something there that he's
trying to get, make more moneyto renovate the house. So, and
the fact that just because he'sused to her working, not working
(32:21):
and taking care of everything,doesn't mean that she's not
allowed to go back to work. Ithink everybody's entitled to
know, okay, I want to go back towork and then we should change
the dynamics around the house.What's the reasoning behind him
being so resistant with that?Because he's gonna have to help
around the house?
(32:42):
I don't get it. Like it's justone of those things where not
maybe for you the situation ofme working from home would be
great, but that's not alwaysgoing to be the sweet spot. It's
always going to stay like that.At one point or another I'm
going to maybe go back to workand you resisting like that
literally as such. It reallyshows how flexible you really
(33:03):
are and how you're not willingto put in the work either.
So what's the point of having apartner like that? Which I think
in this case if he doesn't, ifthey don't sit down and talk and
really talk it through, then Ithink the divorce is really the
only thing that could be withthis whole situation. Yeah, so
what's the final verdict?
Edgar (33:23):
No, she's not the asshole.
Erika (33:25):
I think, I agree, I think the husband is for being an
asshole and not helping her.
Edgar (33:31):
And then the final story is, am I the asshole for walking
out of dinner when myboyfriend's family insisted I
eat meat after four years ofbeing a vegetarian? I, 24
female, have been a vegetarianfor about four years now. It
started as an ethical choicebecause honestly it's just part
(33:51):
of who I am. My boyfriend(26mil) of two years knows this
and has always been superrespectful of my choice, even
though he's a meat eater. Lastweekend his parents invited us
over for dinner.
They're nice people, but kind oftraditional and have always made
little comments about my rabbitfood diet. Usually, I just laugh
(34:11):
it off. When he arrived, his momproudly announced she made her
famous beef stew. I politelysaid, I'd just eat the sides,
but she insisted there werebarely any meat chunks in her
beef stew and I could just eataround them. I reminded her I'm
a vegetarian and I don't eatanything with meat broth either.
(34:32):
That's when she got snippy andsaid, I spent hours making this
special meal and you're beingridiculous. It's just a little
beef broth. It won't kill you. Iwas getting uncomfortable, but
then my boyfriend's dad chimedin with, This generation is so
entitled to special diets. In myday, we ate what was put in
front of us and said thank you.
I was about to just awkwardlyeat some bread when my boyfriend
(34:54):
said nothing to defend me. So, Istood up and said, I respect
your home, but I also respect mychoices. I think I'll grab
something on the way home, and Iwalked out. My boyfriend
followed me and was pissed. SaidI embarrassed him that he
should've just eaten the damnstew this one time to keep the
peace.
His mom has been blowing up myphone saying I ruined dinner and
(35:16):
made her feel like a terriblehost. Because she I feel bad
about the awkwardness but alsothink they should respect my
dietary choices. Like, they knewI was a vegetarian for years. Am
I the asshole for walking out?
Erika (35:29):
No.
Edgar (35:32):
I mean, yeah. She's like, they all know that she just
doesn't eat meat at all. And Ifeel like if you're a vegetarian
for that long, eating meat islike your body has to get used
to it if you ever go back intoeating meat.
Erika (35:46):
Yeah, I think it's very unreasonable. I feel like OP did
the best and he didn't insultthem, he didn't say anything
rude, he just said, I'm justgonna go and eat them on my way
home. That's the best he couldhave done. I don't think he
should have stayed there at all,especially if there was so much
peer pressure on just eatingmeat or eating the beef too.
(36:08):
It's just one of those thingswhere you respect their choice.
Nobody should be forced to eatsomething that they don't want
to eat.
Edgar (36:16):
I was a pretty rage dig for this. Even the mom saying
let's just eat this. What wasthe point of this meal or this
dinner? Just to get thevegetarian to eat meat because
for whatever weird reason theyhave.
Erika (36:31):
Yeah, I don't get it. I mean, if they knew that other
person or P was a vegetarian,What did they expect?
Edgar (36:39):
I know, yeah. It's
Erika (36:41):
not new, it's been years.
Edgar (36:44):
Like imagine you told me you don't like fish, then I told
my parents they cook you fish.Like, What am I going to expect
from that kind of dinner? You'reobviously not going to eat or
you're not going to like thefood.
Erika (36:56):
Exactly. Well, I'm probably not going to eat it.
Edgar (36:58):
Exactly, yeah. And then it would be ridiculous for me
and my family to be upset aboutit.
Erika (37:04):
Yeah, I mean
Edgar (37:05):
It's just the same principles apply to this.
Erika (37:08):
Yeah, especially if you're allergic. I feel like we
kind of had a lot of food ones.The other one was food one for
allergy. I think it's just oneof those things where if you
don't want to eat it, no oneshould be forced to eat it. No
matter if it's gonna be, Iwouldn't say everybody has
entitlement for that.
I think, you know, just sayingthank you and maybe saying I'll
take it to go or whatever orsomething like that is fine too.
(37:30):
But I think it's just one ofthose things where everybody
should have their opinion. Thetop comment is vegetarian forty
five years and more. This is anold story, nothing new here. She
does not respect boundaries.
My sister-in-law would use alittle fat for flavor. This
meant my husband and I just didnot eat it. We never wavered.
(37:52):
She would keep pushing. She knewshe was having you over for
dinner and she tried to coerceyou into eating it.
This is a total lack of respectof who you are. I have people
with all kinds of dietaryrestrictions. I just make
burradi and tell everyone whatthe restricted ingredients are
and which dish. I too have toeat around others cooking. I
don't get weird and I don'texpect anyone else to either.
(38:15):
I'm just grateful that there isso much more choice than there
was in the 70s.
Edgar (38:20):
Yeah, basically. It's just like a weird kind of dinner
because they knew she was avegetarian and then they still
wanted her to eat the meat thatthey obviously made it to be as
meaty as possible.
Erika (38:33):
Like a beef stew, yeah.
Edgar (38:35):
Beef stew, beef broth. There's not even that meaty eat
around exactly. It's ridiculous.
Erika (38:39):
It's just one of those things where also you see a lot
more allergens right now, likegluten or you know, yeast or
whatever. It's just a lot ofthings that where you see a lot
of people getting allergic to,lot of most stuff that people
probably were back then butdidn't know. But we have the
technology now to know. And so,you know, it's not anybody's
fault for not wanting to eatsomething.
Edgar (39:00):
Exactly, yeah. So final verdict?
Erika (39:04):
I would say no, not the asshole. The boyfriend's family
was an asshole. I think he needsa new boyfriend because he
didn't she or he didn't, youknow, stood up for her.
Edgar (39:15):
I feel like he was in on it too.
Erika (39:17):
I think so. It's like oh we're gonna break him or her
today, like OP today, you know?I don't know. It's just one of
those things where you kind ofsee situations like this, you
see your significant other andwho they really are, especially
when it comes to family. And Iwould say break up with his ass.
He don't deserve your OP. That'sall the stories we have today.
Thank you for tuning into thisweek's episode. Check out our
(39:38):
website, www.yappings.com andjoin our mail list for updates.
If you love our podcast and wantto support us, subscribe and
share to your friends andfamily, we would appreciate this
so much.
Edgar (39:50):
Also, we have a Facebook group called AITA Relationship
and Family Drama linked in thedescription. Join us so you can
share any mighty asshole postsyou like or share your own
stories for us all to judge. Wemay even read a few posts in one
of our episodes if you're lucky.
Erika (40:06):
Thank you, bye!
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