November 7, 2023 • 57 mins
We promise you a compelling journey, told through the voice of our guest, the inspiring Heather Devine, who took a tragic event and turned it into a beacon of hope and love. Heather, a mom, wife, business owner, and the guiding light behind People Spread Love, narrates her transformative journey from a self-serving life to one dedicated to spreading love and compassion. She takes us back to the summer of 2015 when, driven by a heart-wrenching event, she started a project with her community that continues to invite people to show empathy and compassion, years later.
Heather's story isn't just about love for others; it's also about self-love. You'll find out how Heather navigated her spiritual awakening and wrestled with self-doubt, all while maintaining a firm belief in the power of love and connection. She talks about finding purpose that goes beyond the transactional aspects of life, and the importance of recognizing our unique strengths. She also touches upon the limitations of the education system and the significance of using our imagination as adults to find deeper meaning in our lives.
In the final moments of the episode, Heather ponders the future of People Spread Love. She shares critical reflections on her journey of self-discovery, the importance of recognizing our uniqueness, and her insights into the future of her organization. She also emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries for herself and finding moments to just sit and be present. Join us on this journey with Heather, as she inspires us to lead a life filled with love, empathy, and compassion.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
Hi, I'm Heather Devine.
I hope when you look back onyour life you see, because you
only go once.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Hello, hello, hello.
I am here with my lovelyco-host, eileen Grimes, and this
is you.
Only Go Once.
Today we're here with awonderful guest, eileen, kick us
off.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
Thanks, cheryl.
So today we have Heather Devine, who wears many hats in her
nearly 40th trip around the sun.
She's a mom, a daughter, afriend, a wife, a business owner
, an executive director ofPeople Spread Love and an
eternal optimist of humanity.
I can say that Heather has beensomeone in my life I'm adding
(00:51):
to your bio here but has beensomeone in my life that, though
we met on an app in an auditoryonly way, has inspired me to
keep doing things that spreadlove and kindness and connection
, and I've just been so amazedby the work that she does and
(01:16):
just the human that she is, andit was one of the first things I
wanted to do was, once westarted this podcast, to bring
Heather on.
I am so, so glad to have youhere today, my friend Heather.
Welcome, welcome.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
Thank you so much for having me.
This was great.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
So we've got a busy night.
We were just talking aboutmoming.
I'm running behind.
I was just getting back fromfirst soccer practice ever for
my daughter, so we ran a fewminutes behind the shoes having
a great time.
So that's that, and we'll bemaking this work and that's what
we do.
So it's always a balance ofthings and sometimes one thing
(01:57):
balances more than the other.
So, heather gosh, I don't evenknow where do I want to kick us
off.
I would love for you to talkabout.
Let's just talk about peoplespread love first, because I
think that there's so much thereand where that got started and
what it is.
That kind of also leads intowho you are as a person.
(02:17):
So can you share with us what?
What people spread love is howit started and sort of where
it's going now?
Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (02:29):
So, oh gosh, I'll start from the beginning in the
summer of 2015.
I remember sitting in my car,sobbing, listening to NPR, when
I heard the news that a whitesupremacist attended a Bible
study at African MethodistEpiscopal Church in Charleston,
(02:50):
south Carolina.
The man shot and killed nineblack people with a lethal
weapon.
I just remember sobbing in mycar and asking the world why
would somebody do something likethis?
Why is there some hate in theworld?
How can this possibly besomething that somebody would
feel like they needed to takesomeone's life, let alone nine
(03:15):
people that were there in a veryheart centered way in a church
praising God?
So to me, that just felt likeabsolute agony, just emphasizing
even though these people Idon't know any of them, I didn't
know those that are lost, buteven though we were thousands of
(03:36):
miles away, I felt pain, I feltcompassion and I felt that
community suffering and thatreally significant loss that it
felt so palpable.
It felt like it was my familyand so I felt it is pulling,
(03:58):
because I was already in theparking lot of the grocery
stores, I was going to go pickup groceries for me and my soon
to be husband and I was drawn to, quite literally was drawn to
because I felt like a tug on myshirt to go to the greeting card
section of the grocery store.
(04:19):
And I remember this was pre-kid,so I remember having a lot of
time on my hands and I stood infront of the greeting card
section and pulled greetingcards that were filled with
compassion and love and werecentered around Christianity,
because this is the tap in aChristian church and I felt
(04:39):
really called to really holdspace in my heart for people
that I don't know and justletting the congregation know
that somebody far away thatdoesn't know them cares really
deeply for their loss.
So as I was driving home thatnight, I was called.
I felt like you know of thiscorrection came through because
(05:02):
I was like, okay, me and myfiance can sign these.
And then I was immediatelycorrected like no, you need to
ask the whole community to signthem.
And as soon as I contactedeverybody that I knew in the
Valley both colleagues, friends,volunteers I got an immediate
yes response from every singleperson that I contacted they
(05:26):
would meet me publicly, theywould go to my place of business
, they'd go to my home, theywould sign these cards, fill
them with love and compassionand just with all this heart,
letting them know they're notalone.
And at that moment I realizedthere was something there, and
so I filled the box.
It was a medium sized box andin the return address portion I
(05:50):
wrote People Spread Love.
I didn't think about it, itjust kind of flew, it kind of
flowed through me.
It was as if like, okay, thisis what I need to do right now,
like this is my purpose, whichis one of my many hats that I'll
wear on this earth.
And I don't know if it's goingto go beyond this moment.
But lo and behold, it's beeneight years and the moment of
(06:17):
compassion and empathy that weneed to share with each other,
reminding each other we're notalone, has not changed.
And that was the moment whenPeople Spread Love was born.
And I feel really humbled forthe opportunity to be able to
share that with both of youtoday, because, even though it's
been eight years, it stillfeels really fresh.
(06:39):
It still feels really newbecause, based on the name of
this project and the whole soulof the project is to serve the
community and for people toSpread Love it's an invitation
for people in the community tostep up and show compassion and
empathy for others.
Speaker 3 (06:57):
And it's I mean.
I mean, well, you have to go tothe website.
There are so many differentopportunities for people, for
anyone who wants to take part inthis.
You can be anywhere and do thiswork.
You can be an ambassador oflove which I love the name of
that too and or if there'ssomeone that you know that could
(07:21):
use love in whatever way, shapeor form, that is, wherever they
are in the time of their livesthat they could just use an
extra, you know someone reachingout to say I see you, you exist
, you matter.
It's just such a beautiful,beautiful program that you have
(07:45):
now and this is now a nonprofitorganization too.
From everything that that camefrom from that really, really
deep place, I think one of thethings that really touched me
too, from this, from your storyand just hearing this, is that
you know, I think some of ussometimes get caught in that
trap of I just experiencedsomething very, very deeply and
(08:08):
it was very difficult, and youknow this is, I understand there
are traumatic responses fordifferent things and you then
took the next step to say, well,what can I do?
What can I?
How can I?
How can I move the needle, howcan I start, even if it's one
small thing, even if it's agreeting card right, it's one
(08:28):
small thing, it's one small step, and I just think that taking
that next step to say I have theability to do something that
opposes what this was to try tomake this world a better place
is such an incredible thoughtand idea.
It is a revolutionary idea.
Right To take a step againstthat and to bring back
(08:53):
everything with love.
So I just, every time I hearyour story, it just gives me
goosebumps and I know how muchit means to you.
And what this organization does,you know, is that.
Have you always been like that?
Have you always done thingswhere it's like I can't just
(09:14):
stop and sit in this, I need tomove forward, or is that
something that you've learnedover time?
To take action when action isneeded?
Speaker 1 (09:23):
I think that's a really great question and the
answer is no.
When I was a lot younger, Ilived a pretty selfish life.
I think that with our children,typically, we try to instill in
them, you know, thephilanthropic nature.
We want them to donate theirtime, so, whether that's money
(09:44):
or energy, one of the things.
Growing up I was a Girl Scout.
I was very much volunteer savvy.
My mom is always having me intoprograms to like be a good
human, you know, and I also feellike I have this like well, how
is it gonna benefit me?
Like all that questioning cameup, like I knew this doesn't
(10:06):
feel good thing, but how is thisaligned with me and where I
need to, how I need to exist inthe world.
And one of the things that wasreally pivotal for me was when I
was a young adult, probably inmy early 20s, and I realized
after, you know, going tocollege and getting out of
college and I was working andgoing home and working and going
(10:27):
home and working and going outto happy hour and going out to
eat and just spending so muchmoney on just indulging and
enjoying my social life.
And there's nothing wrong withthat.
I certainly will nevercriticize anybody for enjoying
their lives, however that looksfor them.
But I realized something we'relike, but I'm not serving
(10:49):
anybody right now.
Like.
It felt like it was soself-serving but I was like I
need to volunteer my time.
And so I started volunteeringmy time for United Methodist
Family Services in Richmond,virginia, when I lived there
just prior to meeting my husbandin the city, and I remember
(11:11):
that, reckoning like I need tooffer up my time.
It's the most valuable thingthat we have, right, this is
time and the energy.
And so what I would do is,first thing in the morning, few
times a week, would volunteer mytime to come to an art class
and volunteer my time to an artteacher who's since passed away
(11:32):
from cancer.
She ended up dying from bonecancer and I knew she was
diagnosed with cancer and atthat time she had breast cancer
and she needed extra help.
She couldn't lift boxes, shecouldn't really help his and the
right in that same way, and wewere in a really special
classroom with children who hadautism and they're in different
spectrums of autism and theyjust needed someone to sit there
(11:54):
, make art with them and, justlike, be joyful and kind to each
other, and I could offer that.
I was in my early twenties and Iwas like I've got a lot of
energy, like, and I love makingart, like, and so to me it just
was like a no brainer, like, ohyeah, I'm gonna totally help and
I'll sit and make art with youguys.
You know, and United MethodistFamily Services is an
(12:18):
organization that takes inchildren that have been troubled
in the home, whether they'vebeen abused or just have some
behavioral things that they needextra help with.
And this was a place.
It was a campus too, so thechildren lived on campus and so
I would go be with the childrenand make art and just hold faith
for them.
(12:38):
We would listen to music andtalk about movies and we would
just like relate to each other.
And it felt really natural,like I just wanna be with people
, like children are cool, likeyou know, and it's just, and at
that time I bet just felt like anatural progression for me.
And so I knew there's likelittle seeds.
I feel like we all have littleseeds of like a trail, of like
how do you wanna show up in yourlife, like why don't we
(13:00):
sprinkle these experiences inthere?
And then you can take valuewhere you see fit.
And I feel so grateful for thatopportunity, I feel, because
I'm sure we all go into this too.
But People.
Threadlove has events calledmeet and makes, where we meet
and we make together.
So crafting music, writingnotes of love together.
(13:23):
It's this communal space wherewe're together.
It's not.
There's no confrontation,there's no negativity.
As a matter of fact, I've beendoing this for eight years and
when we hold faith together,people even police themselves.
So if someone starts gossipingabout someone, you'll hear some
20-something say oh, we're hereto spread love today, like we're
(13:44):
out of time for that.
You know, it's just like verypolicing each other gently, like
we're here for heart centeredwork.
We're here for heart work, likeand I like to use the word
heart work Instead of hard workit's heart work.
And we're holding faithtogether and we're being
together.
And I think that most people inthis world find confrontation
and divisiveness in their livesand turmoil when they don't feel
(14:06):
connection.
And I feel like our love opensup and again, creates that
invitation for people to justshow up at the table like come
as you are, let's hold spacetogether.
And it's like.
Maybe it sounds a little toocoo-bi-off for some people, but
I have seen it work and it worksand it's something people are
aching for.
They want to find meaning, theywant to find purpose, like how
(14:28):
can I show up?
And I still think thatvolunteer work at the soup
kitchen, like volunteer work, ifany capacity you can think of,
just getting involved with yourkids' school, anything that you
can think of and how youresonate with like do that thing
, like whatever that is, peoplespread love or also nickname it,
coin it, tsl.
Tsl resonates so much with mebecause it's like not only is it
(14:52):
something that I've seen growup like a child, but I've like
seen what it can do to likereally support community and I
feel so deeply passionate aboutthis work because I know that
it's it worked yeah.
Speaker 3 (15:06):
How often do you run those events?
Are they like a monthly thing,or how often do they happen?
Speaker 1 (15:14):
It's kind of sporadic .
Usually the summers we havemore events and before I became
a mom it was a little bit hardor a little bit easier to
coordinate calendars and stuff.
But my son absolutely lovesgoing to meet and makes.
He helps host with me, he makessure everyone's taken care of.
He's very, he's very nurturingin that way and he loves to make
(15:34):
art and you should see him.
I should show you some thingshe made, but I will in a moment.
But he makes the most beautiful.
Like anytime he makes art, healways incorporates hearts and
he goes mommy, you can use thisto spread love.
He's always collecting love,spreading cards and they're just
(15:56):
so kind and loving and you justput some such good, kind energy
in it, you can tell heunderstands this work, he was
born to understand it and heresonates so much in it.
Speaker 3 (16:06):
So yeah, and it's so cool too, because I know there's
a few things that I've seen.
Also with People's Spread Love.
There's opportunities to submitdrawings for the different
cards that you have.
So tell us a little bit aboutyou know, if someone does want
to join like your starter packsand things like that that people
(16:29):
can kind of use to generateideas that they don't
necessarily feel like they'rethe most creative or things like
that there is something thatcan kind of support them and
being able to still take part inthis.
Speaker 1 (16:43):
So what we actually started two years now is called
the PSL Starter Kit Program, andwhat we do is we offer 200 kits
per year to the communitywhoever wants to participate in
its card making supply.
So it's never claims to be anart kit, right, because we're
(17:03):
not.
You know.
It's more important to likeignite curiosity in writing
notes of love.
It's got directions on how tospread love with People's Spread
Love.
The other thing, too, is thatit's not necessary that you go
to our website, although Iencourage everyone listening to
go to our website atpeoplespreadlovecom and click on
the who Needs Love and you'llsee real time who Needs Love
(17:24):
right now.
There are people all over thecountry and the world that need
to be poured into for variedcircumstances and varied reasons
, and so all of them could usesome love.
So yeah, but what I also wantto encourage with PSL is that
it's not important that you pourinto who Needs Love list.
(17:44):
It's on our website.
You can pour love into anybody,whether it be your congregation
or circle of friends or family.
However you want to show up inyour community, it is completely
up to you.
It's really an invitation tomake this a habit, because I
think the more we make this thenorm, where you normalize
writing those sublots of people,the kindness and empathy for
(18:06):
others will catch on and thenpeople will be like I want to
keep doing this, like whateverthat looks like, if it's not a
note of love, but it's likechecking on a friend, make sure
they're okay, or you know anynumber of thing.
You can think of donating tothe homeless or bringing food,
you know, to food pantry, likewhatever that looks like.
(18:29):
It's really about checking oneach other because when we think
about it, yes, we're acollection of communities.
So I'm in a town in Idaho andthe border of Idaho and Wyoming
we call it Whitehoe, right, andwe're in the mountains.
So we have a small communityhere, but not only is PSL in
(18:51):
this community, but it spans allover the country, because it's
not about just one community,which is where I'm like we spark
interest in breaking down thosebarriers, breaking down those
invisible boundaries of whatcommunity means, because it's
just, it doesn't serve us to tohold those boundaries Right.
(19:14):
It's better when we'recollectively together and
normalizing this part centeredstuff.
So sorry, I want to do a littletangent there.
No, I love it.
No, that's okay.
So hopefully that makes senseat the start of it.
Yeah, definitely yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
Yeah, that's wonderful.
I think it's also very poignantthat we're talking to you on
the 22nd anniversary of 9-11,because there's still so much
pain that resonates from thatevent.
I know where I was when ithappened.
I'm sure that there are otherpeople listening to this know
exactly where they were.
(19:51):
I will also say that that eventthat you talked about, that
triggered everything.
I remember sitting at myworkspace and when they were
going through the names of thevictims, the one that struck me
the most was Cynthia Graham Hurd.
She was a branch manager forthe Charleston County Public
Library System and I don't knowwhy, but to think that a
(20:15):
librarian who had given her timeand space and love to help
people learn and grow was takenaway from us in such a senseless
act, it really struck me sohard that day and I wish I had
known you during that time,because I definitely would have
(20:37):
wanted to do something.
And I think that's thechallenge, right?
Is that oftentimes people have.
You know, we talk a lot oftimes, the news focuses on the
worst of humanity and I don'tthink we do enough of looking at
the best of humanity, and Ithink your space in particular
looks at the best of humanityand I'm so glad that people
(20:59):
spread love exists, becausethere's a lot of people out
there, obviously, that need thelove and support, whether it's
an individual moment, whether itis, you know, a natural weather
catastrophe, whether it's ashooting, whether it's just, you
know, people just feeling alone.
(21:20):
You know, those letters, I cantell you, mean a lot.
I love getting snail mail, like, even if it's an email, but I
also love, like, that art of thehandwritten letter.
I just think that that is justan amazing, amazing piece of
that.
Yeah, I just, you know, thankyou so much for creating this
organization.
(21:40):
If you could look back as youtalked about being an empathetic
child, but also looking at,like, what's in it for me and
things like that, right, if youcould go back now and talk to
your younger self, like, whatadvice would you give to her?
Speaker 1 (21:58):
I would tell her a lot, but I think I would give
her a really big hug because,you know, a little emotional for
a second, because for thelongest time I'm still
overcoming this as an adult isThen I wasn't smart enough.
Mm-hmm, that I was a smart Icouldn't possibly like.
Just my, my little voice in myhead that I've had since I was a
(22:21):
little girl was you're notsmart enough.
You don't retain informationthe way that other people do.
There's something wrong withyou.
You couldn't possibly rise tothe occasion to do anything
worthwhile.
That was always the chatter inmy head, and I know that's all
completely BS right now.
So the reason being is that IFelt something that was so
(22:46):
important, a message so clear,and I'm a very spiritual person.
I'm not religious, I'm veryspiritual like I.
I experienced life like I.
I just think that there'ssomething bigger than me and I
think that we all have a purpose, like we all have something,
and perhaps we have severalpurposes, which is also fine.
(23:07):
You know, I think that there'sa multitude of things you can do
to show up in your life and Ithink what felt so clear as a
bell is that I needed to dosomething at that moment sitting
in my car, and Perhaps thatmoment has been poking at me
prior to that moment, but thatmoment I stuck.
It was something that I justheard loud and clear, and so
(23:29):
what I would say to myself isHeather, you are worthy, you are
smart, you Are intuitive.
Just listen to your, to themessages that are coming through
and, yes, there's gonna besprinkled in doubt, but I also
think that's part of the journey.
I Don't think that I would haveheard this message come so
(23:51):
clearly.
I don't think I would haverisen to the occasion of proving
other people wrong that I wassmart.
So I don't know if I wouldchange anything.
I think I would.
Just Now I can heal.
I feel like we still have theopportunity to like, heal and
send good energy to our youngerselves now you know that we're
not younger and just saying likehey, okay, girl, like you got
(24:12):
this, like just do you, do yougot to do.
Now I, I am to admit like I'mlearning constantly, so there's
never a moment where I'm like Ifinished.
Good, you know, cleaning myhands of this life is so
exploratory and it's so exciting.
There's so much to learn.
There's so many people in theuniverse to know.
(24:33):
I mean the fact that I havethis incredible human, that I
get to share my life with my son.
He's all.
He's my greatest teacher.
He teaches me patience, heteaches me Kindness, he teaches
me to just play my goodness like.
As an adult, you're taught to beso dang serious.
I grew up what you want to dofor a living Sorry, my dog is
(24:53):
biting your Tony.
I'll such a weirdo.
Um, so if you hear this, okay,oh, my god, that's it.
You're freaking me out.
I'm sorry, I'm like just drive,it's like a big, like it's so
annoying anyway.
So my All that being said, isthat, like there's an
opportunity to do a lot ofhealing for your younger self
(25:14):
and I think that we all have theopportunity to do that.
Just, you know, create someunderstanding and level of self
awareness and love and bring itinward.
Yeah, I am.
Speaker 3 (25:26):
I'm in this program right now to it's, I'm using it
for some of the, you know,internal work and things like
that that I'm gonna be able toapply in some of the coaching
things that I do and life ingeneral.
But it was, it's been beautifulbecause we've been talking
about Wisdom, but wisdom throughfour different lenses, one
being cognitive wisdom, which iswhat that is traditionally in
(25:50):
School, right, that's the stuffthat you memorize from the books
, that's the stuff that you it'sgreat, like we still need all
of those, those things and welearn from science and we learn
from History and dates and mathand all of those things.
And then there's three otherlenses.
There is the embodiment lens,which is the actual knowing of
(26:11):
ourselves, this wisdom ofourselves, and that includes
that intuitive nature that wehave and and listening to our
guts and really Justunderstanding what that piece
means and I.
And then there's sacred wisdom,which is knowing of that which
has come before us and thethings that connect us into the
(26:35):
earth and to you know all theworld around us.
And then there's also therelational Wisdom, which I think
is fascinating because that isthe connection like it's a lot
of what you're doing is theconnection between people that
that doesn't get taught.
You're not, you don't, youdon't sit in a classroom and and
learn that that is actuallyjust as valuable and just as
(26:58):
beneficial.
And the world needs those allfour of those lenses in order to
Survive as a species, in orderfor us to really exist together
and co-create and and make thisworld what we want it to be.
We have to have all these pieces, but we, we emphasize very
(27:20):
heavily here, especially in sortof the, the US, that cognitive
wisdom is like the then thenyou're smart.
If you know that one, thenyou're smart.
And you know I just that's not,for, like, art doesn't come
from cognitive smart.
You know those, these thingsthat are, these expressions that
(27:40):
are so healing for the worldwhen we have them.
You know, it's just not asemphasized here, and I'm I want
to give your little Heather ahug also and same same, you know
, as my little Eileen and allthe little, all the little
(28:01):
non-cognitive people that havethese other expressions that
need to be shared.
And Anyway, it's just, you knowI it's helpful to like have for
me having that, that mindsetnow, an understanding of these
different sort of approaches towhat wisdom and smarts can be,
and You're definitely doing Allof those, so I'm grateful that
(28:25):
you've kept going.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
And thank you, eileen , that's it's so important to
talk these things through,because you know raising a kid,
as you know, is you want to,like, make it right, you know,
for your little self and thenfor your kid's self right.
You want them to also like, youwant to heal through loving
(28:49):
them and nurturing them andtheir strengths.
And I think that, and not thatwe should have all this pressure
to be perfect, because that'snot what I mean, it's more of
like okay, I'm acknowledgingthat this is something you
really resonate in.
How can I show up for you?
Because my parents did show upfor me.
They really did see that.
I learned differently, but theyreally really did and I think
(29:10):
they did the best they could atthe time to nurture that, and
the public schools only could doso much as far as like
nurturing certain parts ofourselves.
Education system is limited, asyou know, so I think that, like
having a support system at homeand having people who know you
and can support you and yourstrengths is super important.
(29:32):
I know a lot of book smartpeople.
I mean there was one time and Iwon't name names there's one
time I was telling a telling afriend or an acquaintance at the
time like, yeah, I'm going togo.
You know, she said what are youdoing?
That's become.
I said I'm volunteering.
And she goes well, why wouldyou volunteer if you don't get
paid?
(29:52):
And I'm like, well, let'svolunteer work.
And it was just like this howdo we explain volunteering?
Your time is not an exchange of?
money Like, because I don'tthink everything needs to be
exchanges of money and, yes, Iknow we work in a world that
money is important.
We use it, we spend money.
(30:13):
Again, I think money is energyexchange, right, right, but I
don't necessarily think it'severything, and I shouldn't be
the only motivator on why wewake up in the morning.
There's so much more to lifethan just going to work.
So and that's probably what Iwould, you know, probably the
greatest wisdom that I can shareis that there is more than work
(30:35):
.
I also work, but I love thejuiciness of like taking my
teeth into something else thathas more meaning, that has
deeper meaning, that I feelexcited about, and I think that
that's something that I wish foreverybody on the planet to like
identify with, that can findthat thing, whatever that thing
(30:58):
is.
But you're like, hey, I'mtaking my strengths and I'm
putting them over here becauseit matters, because it impacts
people, and I think that youknow, finding that is a real,
it's a real gift.
It's really really quitewonderful.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
I mean I, I don't know, I don't think we've ever
really, you know I, I, I, youknow, I agree, yeah, that really
hit me, I think, because welive, and I don't know if it's
just you know I, I work incorporate America.
You know, most of us here haveworked in corporate America, I'm
assuming.
And it's really about thetransactions and it's so nice to
(31:39):
have something of a transactioninvolved, and I think that's
the reason why Eileen and I dothe podcast, just because we
love to be able to provide aspace for people to tell their
stories and, plus, we asstorytellers, also love to hear
really grand stories.
So for us, we get to enjoy this, but for us, it's really about
(32:01):
providing the space to tellstories and it goes beyond that
transactional philosophy.
So I love that you, you soughtsomething that is beyond the
work, the nine to five.
That's wonderful.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
I think you know I know that not everybody has the
option to do that, but I don'twant to be naive.
People have extra time tovolunteer that, have extra time
to fit in or have a supportsystem to do that.
Some single parents don't havethat.
Some people just are workingfrom sunrise to sunset and I
will never, ever compare myprivileged life to somebody
(32:38):
else's and assuming they haveextra time to kill.
But I do know that there isdeeper meaning, and the deeper
meaning may be, it can lookdifferent for everybody and I
think that just using ourimagination right, using our
imagination, being imaginativeas adults, is so important for
our mental health.
(32:58):
It's so important to figure out, ok, where can I reside?
That holds significant meaningLike what does that look like
for me?
Because I don't think what I doin my volunteer time should
ever take away time from peopleyou love.
It shouldn't take away timefrom the priorities you set for
(33:19):
yourself in your life and yourlove.
You should be able to makeadjustments.
I remember when I brought Elliothome, my son Elliot, from the
hospital, I actually reached outto all my volunteers in the
valley that I live in and theysaid, hey, I have a newborn baby
, I can't hold events.
If you'd like to hold an event,come pick up supplies from my
(33:40):
house.
And people did.
It was great, it was wonderful.
I mean I was able to still goto the post office and mail
letters out, but I couldn't holdpublic events the way that I
could before, because you're youknow you're pretty homebound
and you're just taking care ofthe baby and your healing and
it's important to have thatcloseness and that precious
(34:01):
space to be with them, and sobeing able to set boundaries for
myself has been hard.
I'm not going to lie I want todo this full time and at the
moment I'm not.
It's not the right timing and,to be perfectly honest, as an ED
, I'm not getting paid.
And it's not even about the pay.
I mean, it's not the motivationfor me.
(34:22):
It's not like I'm getting paidso much money.
You know I'm not getting paidanything and I still so much
appreciate this work.
It really speaks to my soul andwhy I'm here.
So that's why I'm doing it.
Speaker 3 (34:36):
Yeah, no, it's, it's beautiful and, like I said, I
mean, ever since I found outabout it, I try to encourage
others to participate in it aswell.
When we were talking about someof that too, just you know,
even if you're at work.
So, like like Cheryl and I weretalking about before we we
started, we started this.
(34:56):
I think some of those thingscan happen at work too.
Right, it can be during the dayjob in which you are doing
things, and that can beencouraging those that are newer
into the organization andshowing them the ropes, looking
down and helping, you know, lenda hand down to those who are
below to mentor to do those kindof things too.
(35:17):
It doesn't have to be outside ofthose working hours in which
you were, you were giving ofyour time.
I think there are ways toincorporate some of that as well
, because I get it Like there,when you're working two jobs and
are are, you know, just to beable to sleep, is is something
that is a necessity at thatpoint.
So, yeah, it doesn't have to be.
(35:40):
It doesn't have to be Heather,you've done an amazing job and
it doesn't have to be creating awhole nonprofit.
Speaker 1 (35:48):
So, um, no, no, no, absolutely not, and I totally
realized that that's not thejourney for everybody.
And no, nor should any, norwould I recommend everybody,
everybody doing it right.
It may not be for you, youdon't want to deal with that
amount of paperwork or stress or, um, I get it, um, but I do
know that there's so manyamazing organizations that are
(36:10):
doing such beautiful work.
If you resonate with any ofthose that are already doing
some work that you resonate in,then, hallelujah, like that's,
that's great.
You know, cause it's like.
What I really like about peoplespread love is that you can
pick it up or put it downanytime you want.
There's no pressure to do it.
Um, you, you do it when you canfind time to do it.
(36:33):
You maybe want to do it aroundthe holidays as like a family
event, like it's totally up toyou.
It should fit with your life,um, and that's really what it's
about.
It's about accessibility, it'sabout being able to show up for
community.
If this is how you resonate andconnecting with community, I
say yeah, like, let's do it.
(36:54):
I can show you how to do it.
Um, it's very, in my mind, verysimple, but I think that some
people need to walk through andneed to be reminded like, hey, I
can do something.
And when some of it isself-motivating, right Like it.
Is that self-motivation?
You just, you know, take theinitiative, um, uh, you can even
look at if you go to ourwebsite, you can look at the
(37:15):
testimonials and you can see howit's impacted people's lives.
So that's the measurable.
That's when you know, okay,this is something here.
You can see pictures of thecards, um, and so yeah, and it
goes.
So what's really exciting, youguys and I'll totally share this
too is not only does somebodyinitially receive notes of love,
(37:36):
but then they see that it comesfrom people's spread, like the
organization's.
People spread love.
And then they say to themselves, well, I can do it too.
And then they continue tospread love.
So it doesn't stop with justone person.
It continues on and on, whichis what it was supposed to do.
It's supposed to be somethingthat doesn't rely on me, which
(37:56):
is why it's called not, it's notcalled Heather spreads life.
People spread love.
It's supposed to be about youguys.
It's nothing to do with me.
It's not about the ego.
It's not about somebodymiraculously saving the day and
swooping in with a bunch ofgreeting cards.
You know, um, but as simple asit is to write a note of love to
somebody, it's not the act ofdoing it is not original at all,
(38:22):
right, but it's the, the wholeact of doing it and the
receiving in it and that energyexchange.
That's really, really Truly.
There's something there and Ithink that that's really cool to
like be part of that journeyand that exploration with the
community and seeing how peopleare affected by it and how
(38:45):
people are realizing like theycan also elect themselves.
You go to our website and youcan click on request love and
you request love for yourself,you can request love for someone
else and the reason like I hada actually a recently um, an
event I had this weekend I had avolunteer that said I'm so
sorry I couldn't show up goingthrough some hard times and I
(39:07):
could really use some love.
So if you can you add me to whoneeds love lists.
And I told her absolutely,we're going to add you.
Um, and she's like I just knowwhat I'm required into right now
and the previous uh, beforethat, another event I had a
gentleman was sitting down forthe first time with PSL's never
heard of us and was writingnotes of love for a little boy
(39:30):
and he goes I could really usesome love and he kind of giggled
, but he really meant it, um,and his best friend one of his
best friends would see next tohim and she goes, he could use
some love.
And so she requested love forhim.
Um, because it's like it's soimportant it doesn't have to be,
you know, suffering severelyfrom this disease, or maybe I'm
going through divorce, or maybeI need to just be acknowledged
(39:54):
that I'm amazing, you know, andmaybe you just maybe that it's
not so tragic and it could beanything, and I think that often
we forget how humanness is veryfluid and, um, we're all facing
some things, some kind ofadversity, um, and we need to be
(40:16):
acknowledged, and I think thatit is simple as that.
Sometimes we just need to beseen, okay.
Speaker 3 (40:23):
Oh my gosh, that's so true.
I mean I'm not going to go intoall of it, but this weekend was
national suicide prevention dayand just as you're talking
about asking for love, asking tobe poured into and how like,
(40:46):
just even me sitting here beinglike, oh gosh, I could never
volunteer myself for that.
Why, why can't?
Why do I feel the shame ofasking to be poured into?
Like what is it that?
Do I feel selfish for askingfor that?
(41:08):
You know, like it just like tothink about why it would feel
wrong of me to ask to be pouredinto and to ask for love.
I mean, that's gotta be.
It's an epidemic, I assume, inpeople craving that but not
being able to ask for it.
(41:29):
So, you know, I just, oh mygosh, I don't know.
That just really hit me hardwith a lot of things going on in
life right now.
But, yeah, I mean, even youknow what, ask for it, put your
name in there.
We'll put your name in therefor you if you need it.
But that's, it's okay if youneed a little something right
(41:52):
now and you were amazing andworthy of having that love.
Speaker 1 (42:00):
So yeah, I love it.
You've really hit on something,eileen, because I think a lot
of us have a hard time,especially adults with
worthiness, because we have tounpack a lot of our worth or
what we perceive is worthy ofanything, worthy of love, worthy
(42:21):
of acknowledgement that we'realive, that you know.
And, again, I think, if you'reliving and breathing, you should
be acknowledged, and I thinkthat you can still acknowledge
people that aren't.
But I think living here in thismoment and can receive love is
so important and I will have totell you so we have, as an
(42:47):
organization, I've sent love topeople that are in the public
eye, but also sent love topeople that are not.
But what's really cool is thatlately I've been sharing and,
well, I've been writing notes oflove to Patch Adams.
Speaker 2 (43:02):
You're familiar with Patch Adams.
Oh, my goodness, yeah.
Speaker 1 (43:06):
Yeah, he's been exchanging letters with me
personally to People Spread Love.
He wrote me back and he askedmore about the organization and
he goes that's incredible thatyou're doing this kind of work,
and so it's just really cool tolike share our story and talk to
him more intimately throughletter writing, because if you
write him, you guys, you willget a letter back hands down.
(43:27):
He'll always write you back andwhat's so incredible is that
he's like it was so fulfillingto receive notes of love from
your volunteers, like how sweetto be acknowledged that I do
something in the world.
And it's like, yeah, we need it.
Like because I mean we could gotomorrow, right, so being
acknowledged and feeling love,like I'm starting to cry.
(43:50):
It really there's somethingthere and I think if we just
acknowledge people with a socialmedia post or something in
there, a comment on excuse me,I'm like an O-bit right.
After you pass away and we havesay all the kindest loving
(44:11):
things to people after they'regone.
It's like we have lost anopportunity to say I see you now
the way that you are.
Speaker 3 (44:22):
This is why I love you, Heather.
I'm just gonna say I love you,I love you.
I do.
I think you're such a specialgift to this world.
Truly.
Speaker 1 (44:31):
You're very sweet and I think the thing is is like
there's something there, likehumans forget how special they
are.
Every single one of us arereally special.
We're all unique.
We have we bring somethingspecial to someone's lives and
it's just really important tolike unlock that, because as
(44:52):
adults, we lose our sense ofself.
We lose it because our ego getsin the way.
We wanna look cool, we wannalook hip, you know, whatever it
looks like, we wanna do it right, we don't wanna get it wrong
and maybe in our older years oreven even our death bed, we're
like oh, I didn't have to putmyself through that torment of
(45:12):
criticizing myself every timethat I made a decision.
I could have just been okaywith like and been loving to
myself, because that is thelongest relationship you'll ever
have is with yourself.
And the thing is is we gottapour into ourselves like
affirmations, sharing yourgratitude, sharing your wins,
having this opportunity to likesay hey, little me or hey,
(45:36):
future me, because there's afuture me website.
I don't know if you guys haveever done that.
I'm sure, oh, it's pretty great.
So this is another really greattool that I just love.
But you can go, I think it's.
I think it's future me, yeah.
So, futuremeorg, you can writea letter to your future self.
So you can write a letter toyourself September 11th 2024.
(46:00):
And write specifically a letterto yourself, and then what
it'll do is it'll send it to youin an email reminding yourself
of whatever you wanna tellyourself in the future.
And I think it's pretty clever.
I've done it several years in arow and I haven't done it in a
couple years, but I think Imight start again.
Still like remind myself.
You're on the right track.
Speaker 2 (46:22):
You know, I love that .
Speaker 1 (46:24):
Yeah, right, why not?
Like I don't know, it's pretty,there's so many tools that are
fingertips, right, like there'sso many things.
Let me share this one thingwith you while I, while I put on
spaghetti sauce on the stove sohold on a second.
God, no, you're not.
But the one thing that I findyou know pretty incredible that
(46:46):
I started a couple years agowith my family I think it's only
three years this year Is I havea memories jar.
We call it divine memoriesbecause that's my last name, and
what we do is we have littlesheets of paper scrap paper and
we write memories.
So we write silly things, ourson does silly moments, and we
(47:09):
write it in these little, littleshreds of paper.
It's a little scrap pieces ofpaper.
We date them too, so we don'tforget special things.
That happen because we tend to,as human beings, as part of our
survival mechanism, is that wefocus on the things that went
wrong.
We don't focus on the good, andso often what happens is we
(47:32):
fixate on what went wrong.
I got hurt.
You know this loss happened,and not that it not that that
doesn't matter, but it's moreimportant to focus on what good
things did happen.
How did you?
You know just even small things, right, like so, for example,
(47:54):
oh gosh, my son said somethingfunny.
He was always saying somethingfunny, but we've got moments in
there that we share and it'sjust so incredible how we miss
out on life when we focus on thestuff that's wrong.
But what I noticed is thatduring New Year's, we'll take
(48:14):
out all of the memories thathave been folded in there and my
husband will write something,my son will write something and
I will write something and we'llput them in order from which
they happened and then we'lltape them inside of this journal
we have in our bookcase and itbecomes this memory journal that
we've collected over the wholeyear and it becomes this
(48:38):
opportunity to reflect on howbeautiful life is together.
How beautiful life is even ifthere are some negativity in
that.
Right, if you lost a job and inmy case I got hurt on Easter
and tore my ACL and I neededsurgery and something to
rehabbing my knee but it's stilla gift, because what it has
taught me is to stand still toset the paint.
(48:59):
So I've been painting more andI've just been more focused on
getting my body to where itneeds to be so I can like maybe
I needed to stand still for thatmany months, maybe I needed to
sit down and like take a loadoff.
I don't know what that lessonwas, but there's so much level
of importance embedded in lifeand we miss it if we fixate on
(49:20):
what's wrong and I think thatwhat's so incredible.
As a family, we're learning tofocus on good stuff and focus on
the joys of life, and I thinkthat focusing on those silly
things was pretty cool.
So it's a tool I use with myfamily and it seems to be
working really well and it helpsus reflect on the year with joy
(49:40):
.
Speaker 3 (49:41):
That's such an incredible idea, Cheryl.
Do you see when I really wantedto talk with Heather tonight?
Yes, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (49:49):
Yes, Heather, I hope you continue to shine your
humanity and kindness and heartcentered work on the universe,
because we need it.
We need it in the worst waypossible.
I have thoroughly enjoyed thisconversation.
I have so much to think aboutand now I have to go look at
(50:10):
this future me site because I'mso like what.
This is amazing and I love that.
Not only have you, your site isgonna be chock full of
resources for people, so whatwe're hoping to do for our
podcast is share those resources.
I was wondering if you wouldn'tmind I know you've mentioned it
(50:33):
a couple of times but how dopeople connect with you and your
organization?
Speaker 1 (50:36):
Oh, yeah, so you can visit our website at
peoplespreadlovecom and pokearound the site.
Contact me at Heather atpeoplespreadlovecom.
I'll always answer your emailsand get back to you really
promptly.
As a matter of fact, thisThursday we've got a virtual
(50:58):
meeting and I'm not sure if thispodcast will be available by
Thursday and I don't wanna putany unneeded pressure on you,
ladies.
What we do is we offer monthlyZoom calls with our volunteers.
Okay, sorry about that, cheryl,that's okay.
So, yeah, so we actually host avirtual meeting every month to
help, and it's usually the thirdThursday of every month.
(51:20):
This Friday is an exception.
I'll be out of town on Friday,so I just switched it to this
Thursday, but it's anopportunity for potential
volunteers and peoplespreadloveand current volunteers to learn
more about the organization andreally just listen to our
volunteer coordinator, jackie,and myself and talk about
(51:40):
peoplespreadlove and how it fitsinto your life.
So it's a great opportunity.
An hour of our time.
We just volunteer an hour amonth to talk to people, because
sometimes people, like Imentioned before, don't wanna do
it wrong and they have a hardertime using their imagination.
And peoplespreadlove is reallyabout making it work and fit in
(52:01):
your life, and some people needthat extra guided hand, so we do
that as well.
Speaker 2 (52:07):
It's wonderful yeah.
Speaker 3 (52:09):
So okay.
So our last question is reallythis this is happening question.
That is about, like you know,it's really about the things
that are on your heart and boy,oh boy, my dear, you wear your
heart on your sleeve so much andit's a beautiful, wonderful,
wonderful thing.
(52:29):
You know, it is finding thosethings, that and things that we
wanna pursue or need filled inour heart that we need to
continue pursuing over the nextcourse of our lives.
So you know what does that looklike for you or for
peoplespreadlove?
You know that's sort of what'shappening.
Next Is it a continuation ofthe amazing work that you're
(52:53):
doing?
But, yeah, is there anythingthat you're feeling that just is
coming up for you that isdefinitely going to be happening
or that you feel like needs tohappen within your life to
continue living it to itsfullest?
Speaker 1 (53:08):
Oh, my goodness.
So, hmm.
So there's a lot of things thatare on my heart that I wanna
see happen with peoplespreadlove, but one that comes up really
strongly just asking myself,because I like to ask myself,
like that girl, what's going onin here.
And before I got on the callwith you guys, I did a journal
(53:28):
entry and it felt so good towrite it all on paper, writing
down some vulnerabilities,writing down gratitude, you know
, bringing up to speed where I'mat, because there's a lot of
heaviness, there's a lot goingon in the world and I feel
empathy or human suffering and Iwanna show up.
(53:51):
And so often times they getsuper scrambling because I wanna
live in a certain way, but Ialso have this beautiful life
with my family and that I wannabe present for and, to be truth
be told, I'd love to be able tolike say, hey, this is where
(54:11):
we're doing the PSL, pslvolunteers, please take it up,
like here's the ton, now it'syour turn, kind of thing.
And I wanna do that so badbecause in my mind I've been so,
I wanna be part of everythingand I just can't.
I can't, possibly not with thegrowth that I wanna see happen
with PSL.
I wanna see people normalizingthis kind of behavior and
(54:33):
compassion and empathy forothers.
I want it to be somethingthat's like that is a global
phenomenon, something thatpeople wanna do on their own and
will do on their own, and theydo it with heart and I think
there's that.
But I think, from a human level, just without the hassle, I
just wanna be able to, like, sitand write a journal entry.
(54:56):
Do you think it's so reflecting, having a moment to put down my
damn phone and I apologize ifI'm not supposed- to no, you're
totally fine, you're verywelcome, but I just wanna put my
cell phone down.
I just wanna put it down.
I wanna put the email away.
I don't wanna work when Ishouldn't be working.
I wanna be able to setboundaries for myself.
I wanna be like there's timefor everything in.
(55:17):
Okay, there's time foreverything, but it's not
important that we do it allright now.
Speaker 2 (55:23):
And I'm a right now person.
Speaker 1 (55:24):
I'm a.
If you look at my, you'rewelcome to find me in my
personal profile a doer of stuff.
That's how it's spelled a doerof stuff.
It's because I'm a doer, I'malways doing something, but I
also need to have moments ofbeing myself and not being able
to put on a roll and I don'thave to do anything.
I could just reside, I can justexist, and that should be
(55:44):
enough.
Speaker 3 (55:45):
That's a huge message that a lot of people need to
hear, including myself.
So I appreciate.
I think, cheryl, I got it.
I appreciate that reminder, sothank you, I love you Brad.
Speaker 2 (56:06):
I do, I do, I do.
Oh my goodness, heather, thankyou so much for your time on
behalf of Eileen myself, this isyou Only Go Once.
Thanks everyone for joining usUntil next time.
We'll see you later, bye.
Hi, I'm Heather Devine.
I hope when you look back onyour life you see, because you
only go once.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Hello, hello, hello.
I am here with my lovelyco-host, eileen Grimes, and this
is you.
Only Go Once.
Today we're here with awonderful guest, eileen, kick us
off.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
Thanks, cheryl.
So today we have Heather Devine, who wears many hats in her
nearly 40th trip around the sun.
She's a mom, a daughter, afriend, a wife, a business owner
, an executive director ofPeople Spread Love and an
eternal optimist of humanity.
I can say that Heather has beensomeone in my life I'm adding
(00:51):
to your bio here but has beensomeone in my life that, though
we met on an app in an auditoryonly way, has inspired me to
keep doing things that spreadlove and kindness and connection
, and I've just been so amazedby the work that she does and
(01:16):
just the human that she is, andit was one of the first things I
wanted to do was, once westarted this podcast, to bring
Heather on.
I am so, so glad to have youhere today, my friend Heather.
Welcome, welcome.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
Thank you so much for having me.
This was great.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
So we've got a busy night.
We were just talking aboutmoming.
I'm running behind.
I was just getting back fromfirst soccer practice ever for
my daughter, so we ran a fewminutes behind the shoes having
a great time.
So that's that, and we'll bemaking this work and that's what
we do.
So it's always a balance ofthings and sometimes one thing
(01:57):
balances more than the other.
So, heather gosh, I don't evenknow where do I want to kick us
off.
I would love for you to talkabout.
Let's just talk about peoplespread love first, because I
think that there's so much thereand where that got started and
what it is.
That kind of also leads intowho you are as a person.
(02:17):
So can you share with us what?
What people spread love is howit started and sort of where
it's going now?
Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (02:29):
So, oh gosh, I'll start from the beginning in the
summer of 2015.
I remember sitting in my car,sobbing, listening to NPR, when
I heard the news that a whitesupremacist attended a Bible
study at African MethodistEpiscopal Church in Charleston,
(02:50):
south Carolina.
The man shot and killed nineblack people with a lethal
weapon.
I just remember sobbing in mycar and asking the world why
would somebody do something likethis?
Why is there some hate in theworld?
How can this possibly besomething that somebody would
feel like they needed to takesomeone's life, let alone nine
(03:15):
people that were there in a veryheart centered way in a church
praising God?
So to me, that just felt likeabsolute agony, just emphasizing
even though these people Idon't know any of them, I didn't
know those that are lost, buteven though we were thousands of
(03:36):
miles away, I felt pain, I feltcompassion and I felt that
community suffering and thatreally significant loss that it
felt so palpable.
It felt like it was my familyand so I felt it is pulling,
(03:58):
because I was already in theparking lot of the grocery
stores, I was going to go pickup groceries for me and my soon
to be husband and I was drawn to, quite literally was drawn to
because I felt like a tug on myshirt to go to the greeting card
section of the grocery store.
(04:19):
And I remember this was pre-kid,so I remember having a lot of
time on my hands and I stood infront of the greeting card
section and pulled greetingcards that were filled with
compassion and love and werecentered around Christianity,
because this is the tap in aChristian church and I felt
(04:39):
really called to really holdspace in my heart for people
that I don't know and justletting the congregation know
that somebody far away thatdoesn't know them cares really
deeply for their loss.
So as I was driving home thatnight, I was called.
I felt like you know of thiscorrection came through because
(05:02):
I was like, okay, me and myfiance can sign these.
And then I was immediatelycorrected like no, you need to
ask the whole community to signthem.
And as soon as I contactedeverybody that I knew in the
Valley both colleagues, friends,volunteers I got an immediate
yes response from every singleperson that I contacted they
(05:26):
would meet me publicly, theywould go to my place of business
, they'd go to my home, theywould sign these cards, fill
them with love and compassionand just with all this heart,
letting them know they're notalone.
And at that moment I realizedthere was something there, and
so I filled the box.
It was a medium sized box andin the return address portion I
(05:50):
wrote People Spread Love.
I didn't think about it, itjust kind of flew, it kind of
flowed through me.
It was as if like, okay, thisis what I need to do right now,
like this is my purpose, whichis one of my many hats that I'll
wear on this earth.
And I don't know if it's goingto go beyond this moment.
But lo and behold, it's beeneight years and the moment of
(06:17):
compassion and empathy that weneed to share with each other,
reminding each other we're notalone, has not changed.
And that was the moment whenPeople Spread Love was born.
And I feel really humbled forthe opportunity to be able to
share that with both of youtoday, because, even though it's
been eight years, it stillfeels really fresh.
(06:39):
It still feels really newbecause, based on the name of
this project and the whole soulof the project is to serve the
community and for people toSpread Love it's an invitation
for people in the community tostep up and show compassion and
empathy for others.
Speaker 3 (06:57):
And it's I mean.
I mean, well, you have to go tothe website.
There are so many differentopportunities for people, for
anyone who wants to take part inthis.
You can be anywhere and do thiswork.
You can be an ambassador oflove which I love the name of
that too and or if there'ssomeone that you know that could
(07:21):
use love in whatever way, shapeor form, that is, wherever they
are in the time of their livesthat they could just use an
extra, you know someone reachingout to say I see you, you exist
, you matter.
It's just such a beautiful,beautiful program that you have
(07:45):
now and this is now a nonprofitorganization too.
From everything that that camefrom from that really, really
deep place, I think one of thethings that really touched me
too, from this, from your storyand just hearing this, is that
you know, I think some of ussometimes get caught in that
trap of I just experiencedsomething very, very deeply and
(08:08):
it was very difficult, and youknow this is, I understand there
are traumatic responses fordifferent things and you then
took the next step to say, well,what can I do?
What can I?
How can I?
How can I move the needle, howcan I start, even if it's one
small thing, even if it's agreeting card right, it's one
(08:28):
small thing, it's one small step, and I just think that taking
that next step to say I have theability to do something that
opposes what this was to try tomake this world a better place
is such an incredible thoughtand idea.
It is a revolutionary idea.
Right To take a step againstthat and to bring back
(08:53):
everything with love.
So I just, every time I hearyour story, it just gives me
goosebumps and I know how muchit means to you.
And what this organization does,you know, is that.
Have you always been like that?
Have you always done thingswhere it's like I can't just
(09:14):
stop and sit in this, I need tomove forward, or is that
something that you've learnedover time?
To take action when action isneeded?
Speaker 1 (09:23):
I think that's a really great question and the
answer is no.
When I was a lot younger, Ilived a pretty selfish life.
I think that with our children,typically, we try to instill in
them, you know, thephilanthropic nature.
We want them to donate theirtime, so, whether that's money
(09:44):
or energy, one of the things.
Growing up I was a Girl Scout.
I was very much volunteer savvy.
My mom is always having me intoprograms to like be a good
human, you know, and I also feellike I have this like well, how
is it gonna benefit me?
Like all that questioning cameup, like I knew this doesn't
(10:06):
feel good thing, but how is thisaligned with me and where I
need to, how I need to exist inthe world.
And one of the things that wasreally pivotal for me was when I
was a young adult, probably inmy early 20s, and I realized
after, you know, going tocollege and getting out of
college and I was working andgoing home and working and going
(10:27):
home and working and going outto happy hour and going out to
eat and just spending so muchmoney on just indulging and
enjoying my social life.
And there's nothing wrong withthat.
I certainly will nevercriticize anybody for enjoying
their lives, however that looksfor them.
But I realized something we'relike, but I'm not serving
(10:49):
anybody right now.
Like.
It felt like it was soself-serving but I was like I
need to volunteer my time.
And so I started volunteeringmy time for United Methodist
Family Services in Richmond,virginia, when I lived there
just prior to meeting my husbandin the city, and I remember
(11:11):
that, reckoning like I need tooffer up my time.
It's the most valuable thingthat we have, right, this is
time and the energy.
And so what I would do is,first thing in the morning, few
times a week, would volunteer mytime to come to an art class
and volunteer my time to an artteacher who's since passed away
(11:32):
from cancer.
She ended up dying from bonecancer and I knew she was
diagnosed with cancer and atthat time she had breast cancer
and she needed extra help.
She couldn't lift boxes, shecouldn't really help his and the
right in that same way, and wewere in a really special
classroom with children who hadautism and they're in different
spectrums of autism and theyjust needed someone to sit there
(11:54):
, make art with them and, justlike, be joyful and kind to each
other, and I could offer that.
I was in my early twenties and Iwas like I've got a lot of
energy, like, and I love makingart, like, and so to me it just
was like a no brainer, like, ohyeah, I'm gonna totally help and
I'll sit and make art with youguys.
You know, and United MethodistFamily Services is an
(12:18):
organization that takes inchildren that have been troubled
in the home, whether they'vebeen abused or just have some
behavioral things that they needextra help with.
And this was a place.
It was a campus too, so thechildren lived on campus and so
I would go be with the childrenand make art and just hold faith
for them.
(12:38):
We would listen to music andtalk about movies and we would
just like relate to each other.
And it felt really natural,like I just wanna be with people
, like children are cool, likeyou know, and it's just, and at
that time I bet just felt like anatural progression for me.
And so I knew there's likelittle seeds.
I feel like we all have littleseeds of like a trail, of like
how do you wanna show up in yourlife, like why don't we
(13:00):
sprinkle these experiences inthere?
And then you can take valuewhere you see fit.
And I feel so grateful for thatopportunity, I feel, because
I'm sure we all go into this too.
But People.
Threadlove has events calledmeet and makes, where we meet
and we make together.
So crafting music, writingnotes of love together.
(13:23):
It's this communal space wherewe're together.
It's not.
There's no confrontation,there's no negativity.
As a matter of fact, I've beendoing this for eight years and
when we hold faith together,people even police themselves.
So if someone starts gossipingabout someone, you'll hear some
20-something say oh, we're hereto spread love today, like we're
(13:44):
out of time for that.
You know, it's just like verypolicing each other gently, like
we're here for heart centeredwork.
We're here for heart work, likeand I like to use the word
heart work Instead of hard workit's heart work.
And we're holding faithtogether and we're being
together.
And I think that most people inthis world find confrontation
and divisiveness in their livesand turmoil when they don't feel
(14:06):
connection.
And I feel like our love opensup and again, creates that
invitation for people to justshow up at the table like come
as you are, let's hold spacetogether.
And it's like.
Maybe it sounds a little toocoo-bi-off for some people, but
I have seen it work and it worksand it's something people are
aching for.
They want to find meaning, theywant to find purpose, like how
(14:28):
can I show up?
And I still think thatvolunteer work at the soup
kitchen, like volunteer work, ifany capacity you can think of,
just getting involved with yourkids' school, anything that you
can think of and how youresonate with like do that thing
, like whatever that is, peoplespread love or also nickname it,
coin it, tsl.
Tsl resonates so much with mebecause it's like not only is it
(14:52):
something that I've seen growup like a child, but I've like
seen what it can do to likereally support community and I
feel so deeply passionate aboutthis work because I know that
it's it worked yeah.
Speaker 3 (15:06):
How often do you run those events?
Are they like a monthly thing,or how often do they happen?
Speaker 1 (15:14):
It's kind of sporadic .
Usually the summers we havemore events and before I became
a mom it was a little bit hardor a little bit easier to
coordinate calendars and stuff.
But my son absolutely lovesgoing to meet and makes.
He helps host with me, he makessure everyone's taken care of.
He's very, he's very nurturingin that way and he loves to make
(15:34):
art and you should see him.
I should show you some thingshe made, but I will in a moment.
But he makes the most beautiful.
Like anytime he makes art, healways incorporates hearts and
he goes mommy, you can use thisto spread love.
He's always collecting love,spreading cards and they're just
(15:56):
so kind and loving and you justput some such good, kind energy
in it, you can tell heunderstands this work, he was
born to understand it and heresonates so much in it.
Speaker 3 (16:06):
So yeah, and it's so cool too, because I know there's
a few things that I've seen.
Also with People's Spread Love.
There's opportunities to submitdrawings for the different
cards that you have.
So tell us a little bit aboutyou know, if someone does want
to join like your starter packsand things like that that people
(16:29):
can kind of use to generateideas that they don't
necessarily feel like they'rethe most creative or things like
that there is something thatcan kind of support them and
being able to still take part inthis.
Speaker 1 (16:43):
So what we actually started two years now is called
the PSL Starter Kit Program, andwhat we do is we offer 200 kits
per year to the communitywhoever wants to participate in
its card making supply.
So it's never claims to be anart kit, right, because we're
(17:03):
not.
You know.
It's more important to likeignite curiosity in writing
notes of love.
It's got directions on how tospread love with People's Spread
Love.
The other thing, too, is thatit's not necessary that you go
to our website, although Iencourage everyone listening to
go to our website atpeoplespreadlovecom and click on
the who Needs Love and you'llsee real time who Needs Love
(17:24):
right now.
There are people all over thecountry and the world that need
to be poured into for variedcircumstances and varied reasons
, and so all of them could usesome love.
So yeah, but what I also wantto encourage with PSL is that
it's not important that you pourinto who Needs Love list.
(17:44):
It's on our website.
You can pour love into anybody,whether it be your congregation
or circle of friends or family.
However you want to show up inyour community, it is completely
up to you.
It's really an invitation tomake this a habit, because I
think the more we make this thenorm, where you normalize
writing those sublots of people,the kindness and empathy for
(18:06):
others will catch on and thenpeople will be like I want to
keep doing this, like whateverthat looks like, if it's not a
note of love, but it's likechecking on a friend, make sure
they're okay, or you know anynumber of thing.
You can think of donating tothe homeless or bringing food,
you know, to food pantry, likewhatever that looks like.
(18:29):
It's really about checking oneach other because when we think
about it, yes, we're acollection of communities.
So I'm in a town in Idaho andthe border of Idaho and Wyoming
we call it Whitehoe, right, andwe're in the mountains.
So we have a small communityhere, but not only is PSL in
(18:51):
this community, but it spans allover the country, because it's
not about just one community,which is where I'm like we spark
interest in breaking down thosebarriers, breaking down those
invisible boundaries of whatcommunity means, because it's
just, it doesn't serve us to tohold those boundaries Right.
(19:14):
It's better when we'recollectively together and
normalizing this part centeredstuff.
So sorry, I want to do a littletangent there.
No, I love it.
No, that's okay.
So hopefully that makes senseat the start of it.
Yeah, definitely yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
Yeah, that's wonderful.
I think it's also very poignantthat we're talking to you on
the 22nd anniversary of 9-11,because there's still so much
pain that resonates from thatevent.
I know where I was when ithappened.
I'm sure that there are otherpeople listening to this know
exactly where they were.
(19:51):
I will also say that that eventthat you talked about, that
triggered everything.
I remember sitting at myworkspace and when they were
going through the names of thevictims, the one that struck me
the most was Cynthia Graham Hurd.
She was a branch manager forthe Charleston County Public
Library System and I don't knowwhy, but to think that a
(20:15):
librarian who had given her timeand space and love to help
people learn and grow was takenaway from us in such a senseless
act, it really struck me sohard that day and I wish I had
known you during that time,because I definitely would have
(20:37):
wanted to do something.
And I think that's thechallenge, right?
Is that oftentimes people have.
You know, we talk a lot oftimes, the news focuses on the
worst of humanity and I don'tthink we do enough of looking at
the best of humanity, and Ithink your space in particular
looks at the best of humanityand I'm so glad that people
(20:59):
spread love exists, becausethere's a lot of people out
there, obviously, that need thelove and support, whether it's
an individual moment, whether itis, you know, a natural weather
catastrophe, whether it's ashooting, whether it's just, you
know, people just feeling alone.
(21:20):
You know, those letters, I cantell you, mean a lot.
I love getting snail mail, like, even if it's an email, but I
also love, like, that art of thehandwritten letter.
I just think that that is justan amazing, amazing piece of
that.
Yeah, I just, you know, thankyou so much for creating this
organization.
(21:40):
If you could look back as youtalked about being an empathetic
child, but also looking at,like, what's in it for me and
things like that, right, if youcould go back now and talk to
your younger self, like, whatadvice would you give to her?
Speaker 1 (21:58):
I would tell her a lot, but I think I would give
her a really big hug because,you know, a little emotional for
a second, because for thelongest time I'm still
overcoming this as an adult isThen I wasn't smart enough.
Mm-hmm, that I was a smart Icouldn't possibly like.
Just my, my little voice in myhead that I've had since I was a
(22:21):
little girl was you're notsmart enough.
You don't retain informationthe way that other people do.
There's something wrong withyou.
You couldn't possibly rise tothe occasion to do anything
worthwhile.
That was always the chatter inmy head, and I know that's all
completely BS right now.
So the reason being is that IFelt something that was so
(22:46):
important, a message so clear,and I'm a very spiritual person.
I'm not religious, I'm veryspiritual like I.
I experienced life like I.
I just think that there'ssomething bigger than me and I
think that we all have a purpose, like we all have something,
and perhaps we have severalpurposes, which is also fine.
(23:07):
You know, I think that there'sa multitude of things you can do
to show up in your life and Ithink what felt so clear as a
bell is that I needed to dosomething at that moment sitting
in my car, and Perhaps thatmoment has been poking at me
prior to that moment, but thatmoment I stuck.
It was something that I justheard loud and clear, and so
(23:29):
what I would say to myself isHeather, you are worthy, you are
smart, you Are intuitive.
Just listen to your, to themessages that are coming through
and, yes, there's gonna besprinkled in doubt, but I also
think that's part of the journey.
I Don't think that I would haveheard this message come so
(23:51):
clearly.
I don't think I would haverisen to the occasion of proving
other people wrong that I wassmart.
So I don't know if I wouldchange anything.
I think I would.
Just Now I can heal.
I feel like we still have theopportunity to like, heal and
send good energy to our youngerselves now you know that we're
not younger and just saying likehey, okay, girl, like you got
(24:12):
this, like just do you, do yougot to do.
Now I, I am to admit like I'mlearning constantly, so there's
never a moment where I'm like Ifinished.
Good, you know, cleaning myhands of this life is so
exploratory and it's so exciting.
There's so much to learn.
There's so many people in theuniverse to know.
(24:33):
I mean the fact that I havethis incredible human, that I
get to share my life with my son.
He's all.
He's my greatest teacher.
He teaches me patience, heteaches me Kindness, he teaches
me to just play my goodness like.
As an adult, you're taught to beso dang serious.
I grew up what you want to dofor a living Sorry, my dog is
(24:53):
biting your Tony.
I'll such a weirdo.
Um, so if you hear this, okay,oh, my god, that's it.
You're freaking me out.
I'm sorry, I'm like just drive,it's like a big, like it's so
annoying anyway.
So my All that being said, isthat, like there's an
opportunity to do a lot ofhealing for your younger self
(25:14):
and I think that we all have theopportunity to do that.
Just, you know, create someunderstanding and level of self
awareness and love and bring itinward.
Yeah, I am.
Speaker 3 (25:26):
I'm in this program right now to it's, I'm using it
for some of the, you know,internal work and things like
that that I'm gonna be able toapply in some of the coaching
things that I do and life ingeneral.
But it was, it's been beautifulbecause we've been talking
about Wisdom, but wisdom throughfour different lenses, one
being cognitive wisdom, which iswhat that is traditionally in
(25:50):
School, right, that's the stuffthat you memorize from the books
, that's the stuff that you it'sgreat, like we still need all
of those, those things and welearn from science and we learn
from History and dates and mathand all of those things.
And then there's three otherlenses.
There is the embodiment lens,which is the actual knowing of
(26:11):
ourselves, this wisdom ofourselves, and that includes
that intuitive nature that wehave and and listening to our
guts and really Justunderstanding what that piece
means and I.
And then there's sacred wisdom,which is knowing of that which
has come before us and thethings that connect us into the
(26:35):
earth and to you know all theworld around us.
And then there's also therelational Wisdom, which I think
is fascinating because that isthe connection like it's a lot
of what you're doing is theconnection between people that
that doesn't get taught.
You're not, you don't, youdon't sit in a classroom and and
learn that that is actuallyjust as valuable and just as
(26:58):
beneficial.
And the world needs those allfour of those lenses in order to
Survive as a species, in orderfor us to really exist together
and co-create and and make thisworld what we want it to be.
We have to have all these pieces, but we, we emphasize very
(27:20):
heavily here, especially in sortof the, the US, that cognitive
wisdom is like the then thenyou're smart.
If you know that one, thenyou're smart.
And you know I just that's not,for, like, art doesn't come
from cognitive smart.
You know those, these thingsthat are, these expressions that
(27:40):
are so healing for the worldwhen we have them.
You know, it's just not asemphasized here, and I'm I want
to give your little Heather ahug also and same same, you know
, as my little Eileen and allthe little, all the little
(28:01):
non-cognitive people that havethese other expressions that
need to be shared.
And Anyway, it's just, you knowI it's helpful to like have for
me having that, that mindsetnow, an understanding of these
different sort of approaches towhat wisdom and smarts can be,
and You're definitely doing Allof those, so I'm grateful that
(28:25):
you've kept going.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
And thank you, eileen , that's it's so important to
talk these things through,because you know raising a kid,
as you know, is you want to,like, make it right, you know,
for your little self and thenfor your kid's self right.
You want them to also like, youwant to heal through loving
(28:49):
them and nurturing them andtheir strengths.
And I think that, and not thatwe should have all this pressure
to be perfect, because that'snot what I mean, it's more of
like okay, I'm acknowledgingthat this is something you
really resonate in.
How can I show up for you?
Because my parents did show upfor me.
They really did see that.
I learned differently, but theyreally really did and I think
(29:10):
they did the best they could atthe time to nurture that, and
the public schools only could doso much as far as like
nurturing certain parts ofourselves.
Education system is limited, asyou know, so I think that, like
having a support system at homeand having people who know you
and can support you and yourstrengths is super important.
(29:32):
I know a lot of book smartpeople.
I mean there was one time and Iwon't name names there's one
time I was telling a telling afriend or an acquaintance at the
time like, yeah, I'm going togo.
You know, she said what are youdoing?
That's become.
I said I'm volunteering.
And she goes well, why wouldyou volunteer if you don't get
paid?
(29:52):
And I'm like, well, let'svolunteer work.
And it was just like this howdo we explain volunteering?
Your time is not an exchange of?
money Like, because I don'tthink everything needs to be
exchanges of money and, yes, Iknow we work in a world that
money is important.
We use it, we spend money.
(30:13):
Again, I think money is energyexchange, right, right, but I
don't necessarily think it'severything, and I shouldn't be
the only motivator on why wewake up in the morning.
There's so much more to lifethan just going to work.
So and that's probably what Iwould, you know, probably the
greatest wisdom that I can shareis that there is more than work
(30:35):
.
I also work, but I love thejuiciness of like taking my
teeth into something else thathas more meaning, that has
deeper meaning, that I feelexcited about, and I think that
that's something that I wish foreverybody on the planet to like
identify with, that can findthat thing, whatever that thing
(30:58):
is.
But you're like, hey, I'mtaking my strengths and I'm
putting them over here becauseit matters, because it impacts
people, and I think that youknow, finding that is a real,
it's a real gift.
It's really really quitewonderful.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
I mean I, I don't know, I don't think we've ever
really, you know I, I, I, youknow, I agree, yeah, that really
hit me, I think, because welive, and I don't know if it's
just you know I, I work incorporate America.
You know, most of us here haveworked in corporate America, I'm
assuming.
And it's really about thetransactions and it's so nice to
(31:39):
have something of a transactioninvolved, and I think that's
the reason why Eileen and I dothe podcast, just because we
love to be able to provide aspace for people to tell their
stories and, plus, we asstorytellers, also love to hear
really grand stories.
So for us, we get to enjoy this, but for us, it's really about
(32:01):
providing the space to tellstories and it goes beyond that
transactional philosophy.
So I love that you, you soughtsomething that is beyond the
work, the nine to five.
That's wonderful.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
I think you know I know that not everybody has the
option to do that, but I don'twant to be naive.
People have extra time tovolunteer that, have extra time
to fit in or have a supportsystem to do that.
Some single parents don't havethat.
Some people just are workingfrom sunrise to sunset and I
will never, ever compare myprivileged life to somebody
(32:38):
else's and assuming they haveextra time to kill.
But I do know that there isdeeper meaning, and the deeper
meaning may be, it can lookdifferent for everybody and I
think that just using ourimagination right, using our
imagination, being imaginativeas adults, is so important for
our mental health.
(32:58):
It's so important to figure out, ok, where can I reside?
That holds significant meaningLike what does that look like
for me?
Because I don't think what I doin my volunteer time should
ever take away time from peopleyou love.
It shouldn't take away timefrom the priorities you set for
(33:19):
yourself in your life and yourlove.
You should be able to makeadjustments.
I remember when I brought Elliothome, my son Elliot, from the
hospital, I actually reached outto all my volunteers in the
valley that I live in and theysaid, hey, I have a newborn baby
, I can't hold events.
If you'd like to hold an event,come pick up supplies from my
(33:40):
house.
And people did.
It was great, it was wonderful.
I mean I was able to still goto the post office and mail
letters out, but I couldn't holdpublic events the way that I
could before, because you're youknow you're pretty homebound
and you're just taking care ofthe baby and your healing and
it's important to have thatcloseness and that precious
(34:01):
space to be with them, and sobeing able to set boundaries for
myself has been hard.
I'm not going to lie I want todo this full time and at the
moment I'm not.
It's not the right timing and,to be perfectly honest, as an ED
, I'm not getting paid.
And it's not even about the pay.
I mean, it's not the motivationfor me.
(34:22):
It's not like I'm getting paidso much money.
You know I'm not getting paidanything and I still so much
appreciate this work.
It really speaks to my soul andwhy I'm here.
So that's why I'm doing it.
Speaker 3 (34:36):
Yeah, no, it's, it's beautiful and, like I said, I
mean, ever since I found outabout it, I try to encourage
others to participate in it aswell.
When we were talking about someof that too, just you know,
even if you're at work.
So, like like Cheryl and I weretalking about before we we
started, we started this.
(34:56):
I think some of those thingscan happen at work too.
Right, it can be during the dayjob in which you are doing
things, and that can beencouraging those that are newer
into the organization andshowing them the ropes, looking
down and helping, you know, lenda hand down to those who are
below to mentor to do those kindof things too.
(35:17):
It doesn't have to be outside ofthose working hours in which
you were, you were giving ofyour time.
I think there are ways toincorporate some of that as well
, because I get it Like there,when you're working two jobs and
are are, you know, just to beable to sleep, is is something
that is a necessity at thatpoint.
So, yeah, it doesn't have to be.
(35:40):
It doesn't have to be Heather,you've done an amazing job and
it doesn't have to be creating awhole nonprofit.
Speaker 1 (35:48):
So, um, no, no, no, absolutely not, and I totally
realized that that's not thejourney for everybody.
And no, nor should any, norwould I recommend everybody,
everybody doing it right.
It may not be for you, youdon't want to deal with that
amount of paperwork or stress or, um, I get it, um, but I do
know that there's so manyamazing organizations that are
(36:10):
doing such beautiful work.
If you resonate with any ofthose that are already doing
some work that you resonate in,then, hallelujah, like that's,
that's great.
You know, cause it's like.
What I really like about peoplespread love is that you can
pick it up or put it downanytime you want.
There's no pressure to do it.
Um, you, you do it when you canfind time to do it.
(36:33):
You maybe want to do it aroundthe holidays as like a family
event, like it's totally up toyou.
It should fit with your life,um, and that's really what it's
about.
It's about accessibility, it'sabout being able to show up for
community.
If this is how you resonate andconnecting with community, I
say yeah, like, let's do it.
(36:54):
I can show you how to do it.
Um, it's very, in my mind, verysimple, but I think that some
people need to walk through andneed to be reminded like, hey, I
can do something.
And when some of it isself-motivating, right Like it.
Is that self-motivation?
You just, you know, take theinitiative, um, uh, you can even
look at if you go to ourwebsite, you can look at the
(37:15):
testimonials and you can see howit's impacted people's lives.
So that's the measurable.
That's when you know, okay,this is something here.
You can see pictures of thecards, um, and so yeah, and it
goes.
So what's really exciting, youguys and I'll totally share this
too is not only does somebodyinitially receive notes of love,
(37:36):
but then they see that it comesfrom people's spread, like the
organization's.
People spread love.
And then they say to themselves, well, I can do it too.
And then they continue tospread love.
So it doesn't stop with justone person.
It continues on and on, whichis what it was supposed to do.
It's supposed to be somethingthat doesn't rely on me, which
(37:56):
is why it's called not, it's notcalled Heather spreads life.
People spread love.
It's supposed to be about youguys.
It's nothing to do with me.
It's not about the ego.
It's not about somebodymiraculously saving the day and
swooping in with a bunch ofgreeting cards.
You know, um, but as simple asit is to write a note of love to
somebody, it's not the act ofdoing it is not original at all,
(38:22):
right, but it's the, the wholeact of doing it and the
receiving in it and that energyexchange.
That's really, really Truly.
There's something there and Ithink that that's really cool to
like be part of that journeyand that exploration with the
community and seeing how peopleare affected by it and how
(38:45):
people are realizing like theycan also elect themselves.
You go to our website and youcan click on request love and
you request love for yourself,you can request love for someone
else and the reason like I hada actually a recently um, an
event I had this weekend I had avolunteer that said I'm so
sorry I couldn't show up goingthrough some hard times and I
(39:07):
could really use some love.
So if you can you add me to whoneeds love lists.
And I told her absolutely,we're going to add you.
Um, and she's like I just knowwhat I'm required into right now
and the previous uh, beforethat, another event I had a
gentleman was sitting down forthe first time with PSL's never
heard of us and was writingnotes of love for a little boy
(39:30):
and he goes I could really usesome love and he kind of giggled
, but he really meant it, um,and his best friend one of his
best friends would see next tohim and she goes, he could use
some love.
And so she requested love forhim.
Um, because it's like it's soimportant it doesn't have to be,
you know, suffering severelyfrom this disease, or maybe I'm
going through divorce, or maybeI need to just be acknowledged
(39:54):
that I'm amazing, you know, andmaybe you just maybe that it's
not so tragic and it could beanything, and I think that often
we forget how humanness is veryfluid and, um, we're all facing
some things, some kind ofadversity, um, and we need to be
(40:16):
acknowledged, and I think thatit is simple as that.
Sometimes we just need to beseen, okay.
Speaker 3 (40:23):
Oh my gosh, that's so true.
I mean I'm not going to go intoall of it, but this weekend was
national suicide prevention dayand just as you're talking
about asking for love, asking tobe poured into and how like,
(40:46):
just even me sitting here beinglike, oh gosh, I could never
volunteer myself for that.
Why, why can't?
Why do I feel the shame ofasking to be poured into?
Like what is it that?
Do I feel selfish for askingfor that?
(41:08):
You know, like it just like tothink about why it would feel
wrong of me to ask to be pouredinto and to ask for love.
I mean, that's gotta be.
It's an epidemic, I assume, inpeople craving that but not
being able to ask for it.
(41:29):
So, you know, I just, oh mygosh, I don't know.
That just really hit me hardwith a lot of things going on in
life right now.
But, yeah, I mean, even youknow what, ask for it, put your
name in there.
We'll put your name in therefor you if you need it.
But that's, it's okay if youneed a little something right
(41:52):
now and you were amazing andworthy of having that love.
Speaker 1 (42:00):
So yeah, I love it.
You've really hit on something,eileen, because I think a lot
of us have a hard time,especially adults with
worthiness, because we have tounpack a lot of our worth or
what we perceive is worthy ofanything, worthy of love, worthy
(42:21):
of acknowledgement that we'realive, that you know.
And, again, I think, if you'reliving and breathing, you should
be acknowledged, and I thinkthat you can still acknowledge
people that aren't.
But I think living here in thismoment and can receive love is
so important and I will have totell you so we have, as an
(42:47):
organization, I've sent love topeople that are in the public
eye, but also sent love topeople that are not.
But what's really cool is thatlately I've been sharing and,
well, I've been writing notes oflove to Patch Adams.
Speaker 2 (43:02):
You're familiar with Patch Adams.
Oh, my goodness, yeah.
Speaker 1 (43:06):
Yeah, he's been exchanging letters with me
personally to People Spread Love.
He wrote me back and he askedmore about the organization and
he goes that's incredible thatyou're doing this kind of work,
and so it's just really cool tolike share our story and talk to
him more intimately throughletter writing, because if you
write him, you guys, you willget a letter back hands down.
(43:27):
He'll always write you back andwhat's so incredible is that
he's like it was so fulfillingto receive notes of love from
your volunteers, like how sweetto be acknowledged that I do
something in the world.
And it's like, yeah, we need it.
Like because I mean we could gotomorrow, right, so being
acknowledged and feeling love,like I'm starting to cry.
(43:50):
It really there's somethingthere and I think if we just
acknowledge people with a socialmedia post or something in
there, a comment on excuse me,I'm like an O-bit right.
After you pass away and we havesay all the kindest loving
(44:11):
things to people after they'regone.
It's like we have lost anopportunity to say I see you now
the way that you are.
Speaker 3 (44:22):
This is why I love you, Heather.
I'm just gonna say I love you,I love you.
I do.
I think you're such a specialgift to this world.
Truly.
Speaker 1 (44:31):
You're very sweet and I think the thing is is like
there's something there, likehumans forget how special they
are.
Every single one of us arereally special.
We're all unique.
We have we bring somethingspecial to someone's lives and
it's just really important tolike unlock that, because as
(44:52):
adults, we lose our sense ofself.
We lose it because our ego getsin the way.
We wanna look cool, we wannalook hip, you know, whatever it
looks like, we wanna do it right, we don't wanna get it wrong
and maybe in our older years oreven even our death bed, we're
like oh, I didn't have to putmyself through that torment of
(45:12):
criticizing myself every timethat I made a decision.
I could have just been okaywith like and been loving to
myself, because that is thelongest relationship you'll ever
have is with yourself.
And the thing is is we gottapour into ourselves like
affirmations, sharing yourgratitude, sharing your wins,
having this opportunity to likesay hey, little me or hey,
(45:36):
future me, because there's afuture me website.
I don't know if you guys haveever done that.
I'm sure, oh, it's pretty great.
So this is another really greattool that I just love.
But you can go, I think it's.
I think it's future me, yeah.
So, futuremeorg, you can writea letter to your future self.
So you can write a letter toyourself September 11th 2024.
(46:00):
And write specifically a letterto yourself, and then what
it'll do is it'll send it to youin an email reminding yourself
of whatever you wanna tellyourself in the future.
And I think it's pretty clever.
I've done it several years in arow and I haven't done it in a
couple years, but I think Imight start again.
Still like remind myself.
You're on the right track.
Speaker 2 (46:22):
You know, I love that .
Speaker 1 (46:24):
Yeah, right, why not?
Like I don't know, it's pretty,there's so many tools that are
fingertips, right, like there'sso many things.
Let me share this one thingwith you while I, while I put on
spaghetti sauce on the stove sohold on a second.
God, no, you're not.
But the one thing that I findyou know pretty incredible that
(46:46):
I started a couple years agowith my family I think it's only
three years this year Is I havea memories jar.
We call it divine memoriesbecause that's my last name, and
what we do is we have littlesheets of paper scrap paper and
we write memories.
So we write silly things, ourson does silly moments, and we
(47:09):
write it in these little, littleshreds of paper.
It's a little scrap pieces ofpaper.
We date them too, so we don'tforget special things.
That happen because we tend to,as human beings, as part of our
survival mechanism, is that wefocus on the things that went
wrong.
We don't focus on the good, andso often what happens is we
(47:32):
fixate on what went wrong.
I got hurt.
You know this loss happened,and not that it not that that
doesn't matter, but it's moreimportant to focus on what good
things did happen.
How did you?
You know just even small things, right, like so, for example,
(47:54):
oh gosh, my son said somethingfunny.
He was always saying somethingfunny, but we've got moments in
there that we share and it'sjust so incredible how we miss
out on life when we focus on thestuff that's wrong.
But what I noticed is thatduring New Year's, we'll take
(48:14):
out all of the memories thathave been folded in there and my
husband will write something,my son will write something and
I will write something and we'llput them in order from which
they happened and then we'lltape them inside of this journal
we have in our bookcase and itbecomes this memory journal that
we've collected over the wholeyear and it becomes this
(48:38):
opportunity to reflect on howbeautiful life is together.
How beautiful life is even ifthere are some negativity in
that.
Right, if you lost a job and inmy case I got hurt on Easter
and tore my ACL and I neededsurgery and something to
rehabbing my knee but it's stilla gift, because what it has
taught me is to stand still toset the paint.
(48:59):
So I've been painting more andI've just been more focused on
getting my body to where itneeds to be so I can like maybe
I needed to stand still for thatmany months, maybe I needed to
sit down and like take a loadoff.
I don't know what that lessonwas, but there's so much level
of importance embedded in lifeand we miss it if we fixate on
(49:20):
what's wrong and I think thatwhat's so incredible.
As a family, we're learning tofocus on good stuff and focus on
the joys of life, and I thinkthat focusing on those silly
things was pretty cool.
So it's a tool I use with myfamily and it seems to be
working really well and it helpsus reflect on the year with joy
(49:40):
.
Speaker 3 (49:41):
That's such an incredible idea, Cheryl.
Do you see when I really wantedto talk with Heather tonight?
Yes, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (49:49):
Yes, Heather, I hope you continue to shine your
humanity and kindness and heartcentered work on the universe,
because we need it.
We need it in the worst waypossible.
I have thoroughly enjoyed thisconversation.
I have so much to think aboutand now I have to go look at
(50:10):
this future me site because I'mso like what.
This is amazing and I love that.
Not only have you, your site isgonna be chock full of
resources for people, so whatwe're hoping to do for our
podcast is share those resources.
I was wondering if you wouldn'tmind I know you've mentioned it
(50:33):
a couple of times but how dopeople connect with you and your
organization?
Speaker 1 (50:36):
Oh, yeah, so you can visit our website at
peoplespreadlovecom and pokearound the site.
Contact me at Heather atpeoplespreadlovecom.
I'll always answer your emailsand get back to you really
promptly.
As a matter of fact, thisThursday we've got a virtual
(50:58):
meeting and I'm not sure if thispodcast will be available by
Thursday and I don't wanna putany unneeded pressure on you,
ladies.
What we do is we offer monthlyZoom calls with our volunteers.
Okay, sorry about that, cheryl,that's okay.
So, yeah, so we actually host avirtual meeting every month to
help, and it's usually the thirdThursday of every month.
(51:20):
This Friday is an exception.
I'll be out of town on Friday,so I just switched it to this
Thursday, but it's anopportunity for potential
volunteers and peoplespreadloveand current volunteers to learn
more about the organization andreally just listen to our
volunteer coordinator, jackie,and myself and talk about
(51:40):
peoplespreadlove and how it fitsinto your life.
So it's a great opportunity.
An hour of our time.
We just volunteer an hour amonth to talk to people, because
sometimes people, like Imentioned before, don't wanna do
it wrong and they have a hardertime using their imagination.
And peoplespreadlove is reallyabout making it work and fit in
(52:01):
your life, and some people needthat extra guided hand, so we do
that as well.
Speaker 2 (52:07):
It's wonderful yeah.
Speaker 3 (52:09):
So okay.
So our last question is reallythis this is happening question.
That is about, like you know,it's really about the things
that are on your heart and boy,oh boy, my dear, you wear your
heart on your sleeve so much andit's a beautiful, wonderful,
wonderful thing.
(52:29):
You know, it is finding thosethings, that and things that we
wanna pursue or need filled inour heart that we need to
continue pursuing over the nextcourse of our lives.
So you know what does that looklike for you or for
peoplespreadlove?
You know that's sort of what'shappening.
Next Is it a continuation ofthe amazing work that you're
(52:53):
doing?
But, yeah, is there anythingthat you're feeling that just is
coming up for you that isdefinitely going to be happening
or that you feel like needs tohappen within your life to
continue living it to itsfullest?
Speaker 1 (53:08):
Oh, my goodness.
So, hmm.
So there's a lot of things thatare on my heart that I wanna
see happen with peoplespreadlove, but one that comes up really
strongly just asking myself,because I like to ask myself,
like that girl, what's going onin here.
And before I got on the callwith you guys, I did a journal
(53:28):
entry and it felt so good towrite it all on paper, writing
down some vulnerabilities,writing down gratitude, you know
, bringing up to speed where I'mat, because there's a lot of
heaviness, there's a lot goingon in the world and I feel
empathy or human suffering and Iwanna show up.
(53:51):
And so often times they getsuper scrambling because I wanna
live in a certain way, but Ialso have this beautiful life
with my family and that I wannabe present for and, to be truth
be told, I'd love to be able tolike say, hey, this is where
(54:11):
we're doing the PSL, pslvolunteers, please take it up,
like here's the ton, now it'syour turn, kind of thing.
And I wanna do that so badbecause in my mind I've been so,
I wanna be part of everythingand I just can't.
I can't, possibly not with thegrowth that I wanna see happen
with PSL.
I wanna see people normalizingthis kind of behavior and
(54:33):
compassion and empathy forothers.
I want it to be somethingthat's like that is a global
phenomenon, something thatpeople wanna do on their own and
will do on their own, and theydo it with heart and I think
there's that.
But I think, from a human level, just without the hassle, I
just wanna be able to, like, sitand write a journal entry.
(54:56):
Do you think it's so reflecting, having a moment to put down my
damn phone and I apologize ifI'm not supposed- to no, you're
totally fine, you're verywelcome, but I just wanna put my
cell phone down.
I just wanna put it down.
I wanna put the email away.
I don't wanna work when Ishouldn't be working.
I wanna be able to setboundaries for myself.
I wanna be like there's timefor everything in.
(55:17):
Okay, there's time foreverything, but it's not
important that we do it allright now.
Speaker 2 (55:23):
And I'm a right now person.
Speaker 1 (55:24):
I'm a.
If you look at my, you'rewelcome to find me in my
personal profile a doer of stuff.
That's how it's spelled a doerof stuff.
It's because I'm a doer, I'malways doing something, but I
also need to have moments ofbeing myself and not being able
to put on a roll and I don'thave to do anything.
I could just reside, I can justexist, and that should be
(55:44):
enough.
Speaker 3 (55:45):
That's a huge message that a lot of people need to
hear, including myself.
So I appreciate.
I think, cheryl, I got it.
I appreciate that reminder, sothank you, I love you Brad.
Speaker 2 (56:06):
I do, I do, I do.
Oh my goodness, heather, thankyou so much for your time on
behalf of Eileen myself, this isyou Only Go Once.
Thanks everyone for joining usUntil next time.
We'll see you later, bye.
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