October 31, 2023 • 49 mins
Do you remember the quiet thrill of delving into the pages of a long-awaited book as a child? For Katie Bean, that excitement was coupled with a dream of one day writing her own book. Join us as we journey with Katie, author of the healing memoir, Fragile Thoughts, tracing her transformation from a book-loving child to a published author. Listen to her profound revelations about revisiting old journal entries, turning them into a memoir, and the power of storytelling. Her intriguing experience with her learning circle book club, and the robust role it played in her book promotion, makes for a compelling tale.
Taking care of our inner voice often doesn't get the attention it deserves. Let Katie provide some insights, sharing about her personal practice of naming her inner voice and how it's bolstered her mental well-being. As she recounts the role of yoga and meditation in maintaining her peace of mind, you’ll discover a new perspective on staying present. We also get a unique lens into the world of tattoos and personal mantras. From her first impulsive tattoo to the meaningful ink that adorns her body now, Katie reveals how each design is a milestone in her transformation journey.
Art has always been a potent tool for expressing emotions, and Katie truly embodies this. Her mother was a musician, and the power of art has permeated her life. Learn how books, specifically memoirs like hers, can be a gift that ignites empathy and hope in the reader. As we bid farewell, we delve into the calming world of meditation, its benefits, and the balance it brings. Join us in this heartening conversation with Katie Bean and let her words inspire you to embark on your own journey of healing and personal growth.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hi y'all.
It's Katie being here.
I hope when you look back onlife, you have no regrets,
because everything that you'vedone good, bad or indifferent
has led you to who you are todayand because you only go once.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Welcome, welcome listeners.
Welcome back to another episodeof you Only Go Once, also
affectionately known as Yogo.
I am here tonight, at my leangrimes, with my fantastic
co-host and friend that Ihaven't seen and talked to for a
little while because that'sthat we're not working together
anymore, but we get to spendthese amazing nights together
(00:36):
and meet these incredible people.
So, cheryl, I will let youintroduce our guest for tonight.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
Thanks, Eileen.
Katie Bean is the author ofFragile Thoughts, a healing
memoir which is written as botha personal narrative and
practical guide on healing.
She's an educator and spendsher nine to five talking with
college students about how tolive healthy and happy lives,
and spends the rest of her timetrying to listen to her own
advice.
She loves being outdoors, is ayoga student and teacher and an
(01:04):
avid writer and reader.
She also runs learning circles,which are book clubs with a
self-study twist.
She lives with her husband,John, and dog Charlie in
Phoenixville, Katie Bean welcome, hi.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
thank you so so much for having me.
I'm very excited to be here.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
Katie, we wanted to talk to you a little bit about
you, what your life goals are,how you're living this life
right now.
But first I think we want tostart with your talking a little
bit about your book and mostlywhat made you write your book
and your memoir now versusanother time.
Speaker 1 (01:47):
Yeah, that's a great question.
It really has been a childhooddream to publish a book.
So ever since I was a littlekid, I was making my own little
books and writing stories, andmy mom would like staple them
together in my little pages thatI would write and draw.
So I've always loved writingsince I was a kid, and so it's
(02:08):
just always just been in theback of my mind as like a bucket
list dream goal of publishingsomething I used to think a book
of poetry, maybe.
I used to think maybe I wouldwrite short stories and publish
them, but it actually turnedinto being my memoir that I
ended up publishing and why Ichose that was really.
(02:29):
My own healing journey over thepast many years has been
powerful, life changing, andeach time I share what I've
learned or what I've, how I'vegrown through therapy, through
journaling, through vulnerablestorytelling and community,
through yoga all of those thingstogether Every time I share the
(02:51):
techniques I've used and howit's helped me learn and grow,
people seem to be impacted bythat, you know, and I've gotten
a lot of good response like, wow, that's really a powerful story
, or you should tell more peoplethat you should keep sharing
that.
And so I was really motivatedwhen I started the learning
circle that you mentioned in myintro.
I started that during COVID,that book club, and during that
(03:14):
book club it was just.
I mean, it was amazing it was.
It was like group therapyreally, more group therapy, less
book club.
But we definitely talked about,you know, we would read the
stories, a lot of memoirs and alot of spiritual type self help
books and in those learningcircles we would use the
(03:36):
author's story as kind of ajumping off point for us to talk
about our own lives and how wein our own lives have similar or
different experiences and thatkind of process.
I was like this is exactly whatI think I need to do.
It just kind of hit me, so Iwrote my story and then at the
end of every chapter I havejournal prompts and yoga based
(03:57):
activities to kind of help thereader take my story and then,
you know, see how it connects totheir own life.
And so it's truly built forbook clubs.
This book and meant for peopleto read in community and in
conversation with one another.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
I mean, that's beautiful.
I'm definitely going to have toget it now.
And have you approached bookclubs with this To?
I mean, like I know, there'sonline spaces and things to
promote the book and everything.
So sorry, I just get mymarketing business head coming
on, so I appreciate that weshould totally chat offline on
(04:35):
more ideas.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
I haven't done that.
I am going to because I still Ido this monthly learning circle
.
It's through my yoga studio.
We do a survey every summer forwhat are going to be the books
for the next like year, theacademic year, and of course my
lovely people have chosen havechosen my book to be the first
one in September.
So I will be doing it for them.
(04:58):
But yeah, maybe there's otherways to try to get utilize it in
that kind of space.
It's definitely made for that.
It's made to be read anddiscussed in community for sure,
definitely.
Speaker 2 (05:09):
Well, I know a book club that Cheryl's a part of and
maybe could suggest it.
So yes so as you're goingthrough writing this book.
Obviously I mean with whatCheryl has written, with her own
, and with what you've done, Ithink with many authors.
Right, there's a significantamount of self reflection and
(05:31):
introspection that goes intoespecially writing memoir, right
?
Was there something that justsort of surprised you or that
you found most difficult toreally approach in terms of
getting it from here, from yourbrain and your heart out onto to
paper?
(05:52):
And and how did you get throughthe other side of that?
Speaker 1 (05:59):
Hmm, Great question.
Yeah, what's interesting aboutthis book is because I've been
writing and journaling my wholelife.
A lot of the book was myjournal entries that.
I've rewritten into, you know,to create this book.
So it was very interestingprocess to like go into my
basement and open up these youknow Tupperware bins and pull
(06:22):
out some journals from gradeschool and high school.
I mean it was.
It was wild actually.
The whole process was powerful.
I remember there were times Iwould go down the basement to go
through stuff and then fivehours later I'm like, wow, I
really have to go upstairs now,like I would just get so wrapped
into it.
It brought back a lot ofemotions, of course.
(06:43):
It brought back a lot ofmemories and it led me to more
journaling and more discovery.
And it was really interestingbecause through journaling,
through writing, I have foundconnections that I didn't
realize existed.
So like, as I was looking backon the past and then I was
writing about maybe the lastfive years or so of my life, I
(07:04):
would say, wow, that thing in mypast actually maybe relates to
how I respond to things now.
It was, it was so therapeutic.
So it was really interestingprocess for me and then to turn
it over to you know, with mypublisher, to turn it over to a
developmental editor to havesomeone judge it.
(07:26):
Yeah, that was hard you know,but that you know you need that
to help formulate it into areadable story, and so it was
really helpful to have you knowall of the people involved in on
the editing team, and therewere some chapters I left out to
be very honest.
(07:46):
There were chapters that it waslike the whole world doesn't
need to know every detail.
So, but it was hard becausethere's there's some heavy stuff
in there.
It's basically a book of allthe trauma and heavy stuff I've
been through and what I'velearned from it and how I've
grown from it and so, yeah, it'sdefinitely scary to put that
out in the world, not just tostrangers, not so much to my
(08:10):
mother.
A little more scary, you know,a little more scary to the
people who who were involved inthe stories that are in the book
and and to my, my boss, to my,you know, my colleagues.
Like, oh, you're going to readabout a lot of things.
So that's been a little scary,but I've only received positive
feedback so far.
So that's been been nice.
(08:31):
That's fantastic.
When did it come out?
It came out in May, mid-may.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
Okay, got it.
That's amazing.
Yeah, it's.
Oh, she had the vulnerabilitypiece of becoming a published
author in whatever way, shape orform that exists, whether it's
in a book, whether it's, youknow, blogging out to the world
or you know some article thatyou wrote for a newspaper,
(08:58):
whatever it is.
The vulnerability that you haveto have to allow for that to
enter the world is incredible.
And I mean, have you, was thatsomething you found sort of
through this process, like?
Speaker 3 (09:14):
for me.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
I wasn't ready.
It's at a point in my life tobe able to put something like
that out into the world.
It was through a lot of thework that I've been doing and
I'm still doing.
Like let's be real, right, ofcourse, me too, would you say.
If you had released it fiveyears ago, would it have been
something that you would havebeen able to do?
Speaker 1 (09:36):
Yeah, definitely not.
I think it was birthed when itwas ready.
Yeah, right, you know, I thinkit was all just very
serendipitous, everything thathappened, that led to it.
There was a lot ofsynchronicities that were just
falling into place.
I think it was meant to happenwhen it was meant to happen.
(09:56):
It's also part of my faith.
I believe that boldheartedly.
So I think that was a part ofit.
It just kind of rolled into, itjust happened, I mean.
And the vulnerability piece ofit you know I was nervous, of
course, about the storiesthemselves, about the actual
experience.
I was also nervous that maybepeople would think I'm not, it's
not well written, like it's nota good piece of work.
(10:18):
That was another fear.
So it's like two types ofvulnerabilities there.
You know, is it any good on topof wow?
These are heavy stories andthere's many levels of fear.
Right, there's all kinds offailure that you're afraid of as
you dig down into that.
But the vulnerability itself iswhat has helped me heal from so
(10:39):
many of the things I've beenthrough.
Yeah, when you can sharesomething with someone and they
can, whether they can relate orwhether they can empathize, you
know that's powerful.
And when you can unveilyourself to others, that's
really huge.
So the vulnerability itself hadbeen happening for a while in
my own journey and this was justa natural extension of that.
Speaker 3 (11:01):
Well, I can attest to how well written it is because
it is a phenomenal book and Iwill say I'm also grateful that
the yoga exercise that you putin there are some things that
you could potentially do fromyour chair or standing up, and I
used to call yoga classes fallsdown a lot, because that's
exactly what I did.
(11:22):
I have no skill set in the gracedepartment at all, so I found
these very, very soothing at theend because some of the
chapters that you have are veryheady.
So you've talked a little bitabout vulnerability and I will
say one of my favorite chaptersis the one where you talk about
imposter syndrome and thatvulnerability and naming your
(11:43):
inner voice, and her voice isTiffany and that just made me
feel right, because you neverthink to name your.
You know, often people willtell you name your fear and
that's like half.
You know that's part of thebattle of naming your fear and
then you know facing it head onand I had never thought to name,
(12:04):
like the inner voice, the oneof self doubt and the hesitation
and all of that.
Give it a name.
That was one of my favoritechapters because you're
generally also talked about likehow do you deal with imposter
syndrome.
Have you given, like, try togive your inner voice a name?
And what would you tell thatinner voice?
Speaker 2 (12:23):
So I guess, Cheryl, this is real quick then.
Did you then take that advice?
Yeah, I did, I totally did yeah.
Speaker 3 (12:32):
Yeah, it is because I had like three names rolling
around in my head.
Speaker 2 (12:37):
No, I love that.
I'm sorry, I'm just so curious.
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (12:40):
So I love it.
Yeah, I.
What did I name her?
I named her Lottie.
I think that was the name thatI gave her.
Even though it's a very sweetname, I think that there was,
like you know, Lottie could betough as nails, so you know I
gave her that name, like you'rea Lottie in my head right now.
(13:02):
So no offense to any of thecharlots or the Lotties out
there, it's just that's the namethat I came up with and I
thought, all right, you knowyou're a Lottie right now, Calm
down, Like let me get this done.
Eileen, what would you nameyour inner voice?
Speaker 2 (13:17):
Oh my gosh.
I mean, I haven't had time tothink about this.
You just popped it on me, I didI popped that one on you.
Yes, I mean, I'll be honest, Ihad an immediate reaction to it
and it was Bertha and I don'treally totally.
It seems very overbearing andlike want you to be on the right
track and like stick and stayin the like safe zone of stuff.
(13:40):
So yeah, I'm just gonna have togo with it.
That was my first reaction,probably the most right one.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
Yeah, I love it.
Bertha was the name of my firstcar.
Love it?
Yeah, she was.
She was old and not veryreliable.
Speaker 2 (13:56):
Great.
Speaker 3 (13:58):
It's awesome.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
I can't rely on mine.
So you know that's total.
Thanks, Makes sense, yeah.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
And no offense to anyone named Tiffany right.
That has nothing to do with it.
That technique was you knowfrom my therapist from years ago
and it really proved helpful.
There's a great book calledChatter by Ethan Cross, and
Chatter talks a lot about themind stuff, right Just like the
inner voice and the inner criticand he talks about.
(14:26):
there's a lot of research aroundit too that that proves that
naming yourself, naming yourinner voice, gives like space
between it.
It gives objectivity to thevoice and the voice starts
saying mean things to you.
You can, you know, I kind oflaugh.
I'll say in my mind like shutup Tiffany, and then that's like
ridiculous.
So then I laugh and then I cankind of like get out of that
(14:47):
cycle of anxiety or fear orwhatever is you know going on in
my mind.
But yeah, that's definitely atechnique from my therapist.
Can't take credit for that one.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
No, I love it, so it is.
So you are also.
You also teach yoga.
Is this your yoga instructor?
So I'm curious, because Iremember I also took yoga and
we'll just leave it at that.
But I did it for a little whileand I know one of the things
that I struggled with,especially then, because I did
(15:17):
it in my early 20s and it wasthat inner voice right and when
you're in Shavasana and it'slike I should do this and this
and this and these things arepopping in your head and it's
just like this doesn't stop andyour inner voice keeps going.
And have you ever brought thatconcept then into the practice,
to have those conversations withwhoever you're working with?
Speaker 1 (15:38):
Yeah.
So I mean definitely that's apart.
I mean, the part of yoga I lovemost is in yoga sutras from
Patanjali, like the book written, you know, thousands of years
ago.
The very first line, the veryfirst sutra or maybe it's 1.2,
says yoga.
The purpose of yoga is to stealthe fluctuations of the mind.
(15:59):
That's what it's about.
That is literally the purposeof yoga.
So, yes, I do bring that in andin a lot of my conversations.
I certainly use that myselfwhen I'm taking classes.
That's what it's for.
That's the whole purpose.
It's definitely not so that wecan make pretzels with our
bodies.
It's definitely not so that wecan be flexible and sure, we
(16:20):
build flexibility, we buildstrength, absolutely, and
they're all a byproduct ofgetting.
They're the means to the end,the end being stealing the mind
and being able to meditate andconnect with spirit.
Really.
Speaker 2 (16:35):
And I'm actually more open to trying and implementing
some of the yoga because I'vedone a lot more meditation
practices and breathing work now, because I'm ready to quiet
right, like in my early 20s itwas like, oh, I got to go, go go
, I have to achieve, I have todo all these things, like I'm
not, I'm not standing still,yeah.
(17:00):
So I'm actually much more intoand able to approach in those
things now a little bit later inlife, because it doesn't feel
so, it's not stagnant in the waythat I thought it was, it's
actually Still in the way thatit is being completely present
and I'm much more understandingof what that means now.
Speaker 1 (17:23):
Exactly.
You should come in and practicewith us.
Nectar yoga studio inPhoenixville.
Speaker 2 (17:27):
I would.
I'm in Washington State,however, so it might be a little
hard you can come anyway,that's fine, yes.
Speaker 3 (17:34):
Yep, well, I may be visiting you, katie, because I
think I would like to hear yourversion of yoga versus Some of
the other things that I've seen.
I tried like a 30-day Yoga andthey just got progressively
harder and I was like I'll try,and then by the end I was like
I'll just be in child's pose forthe rest of the session.
Thank you, yeah.
(17:57):
So, going back to your book,your life, everything it was,
honestly, you are such a calmsoul, as I see you reading some
of the book, though I was reallykind of surprised at some of
the the stuff, of some of thestories that were in there,
including some impulsive thingsthat you did.
(18:19):
So if you had to list, or youhad to name, the one impulsive
thing that you've done, what wasit and what did you learn from
it?
Speaker 1 (18:30):
I was going to talk about my impulsivity of like
getting my first tattoo.
Speaker 3 (18:34):
That is actually the one that I was focusing on in my
head.
So, yes, that was the one thatI was thinking of because
Eileen's got tattoos.
I am Tattoo free.
Maybe we'll get thereeventually with one, maybe a
tiny dot or something.
But yeah, that was actually thestory that I was thinking,
because that one made me Justabsolutely crack up.
(18:57):
So would you mind sharing thatstory, because that one is, like
my, one of my favorites fromthe book and and how do you talk
about all that stuff?
Speaker 1 (19:06):
So yeah.
So one of the, yeah, mostimpulsive things was definitely
getting a tattoo right when Iturned 18, and Not thinking it
through at all, just thinking itwould be fun, thinking it would
be funny, and I decided to getmy initials KB in green and
black leopard print on my ashcheek.
(19:27):
And I had to get it therebecause I couldn't let my
parents see it, of course, yep,and they were like you better
not ever get a tattoo.
That like.
I knew that that was theirvalues.
They taught me that and Icouldn't let them see it.
So it's still not visible likein a bikini, right like it's.
It's right on the cheek, and itwas a pretty stupid choice.
(19:49):
It was definitely not.
It was not well thought out.
I thought it would be funny andyou know, the truth is I have a
lot of tattoos.
Now I have five, I'm about toget my six and I love tattoos.
I think they're great, butEvery tattoo since has been very
thought out.
I've I've thought for a longtime, maybe even a full year,
(20:12):
about what I want in theplacement and then, after a year
, if I still want it, I thinkfor about another year and then,
if I still want it.
Maybe I'll start Setting up,finding the person I want to do
it and designing it, which mighttake another year.
So all my other tattoos havetaken years and that one took
about 25 minutes for us all tosay, yeah, that's a great idea,
(20:33):
let's go.
There's a place, y'all justlike.
I had seven friends with me andof course, I'm sitting over the
seat with my pants down becausethey had to get to it and
everyone's taken pictures of mybare ass.
It was just hilarious.
So it was.
It was funny at the time,mm-hmm, and I can still laugh at
(20:54):
it now, but definitelyimpulsive.
Speaker 3 (20:59):
Can you talk about the one that's on the back of
your neck, because that one hasmeaning right?
Speaker 1 (21:03):
Yeah, yeah all the rest have a lot of meaning.
The one on the back of my neckis the ohm symbol in Sanskrit,
the ohm from, from yoga and from.
You know the symbol in Sanskrit, and it has a lot of like
traditional meaning.
I really like it being on theback of my neck because I can't
see it, which to me symbolizeshow I Understand God.
(21:26):
Right, like always there, but Ican't, can't really see it.
And Ohm represents.
I mean, if you, if you askdifferent Yogis and even
different scholars what ohmmeans, you're gonna get a few
different variations.
But ohm is the sound of peace.
Ohm is the sound, the vibrationin which God manifested all
things.
(21:48):
Ohm has a lot of like deepermeaning within the structure of
the symbol itself.
There's three parts of thebottom which are, let's say,
there's a bunch of them waking,dreamless sleep and and sleep.
And then there's, like this I'mmaking hand gestures and no one
(22:08):
can see me.
You know, you know on the radio, but there's like a, an arch,
the very consciousness that kindof separates those states.
And then the doubt at the topis representing God.
So there's a lot of.
I mean, there's whole books onand what it means.
But that's a really briefVersion of how I understand it.
Speaker 2 (22:31):
Yeah, I was reading somewhere recently oh gosh, in
my, my day job, we're talkingabout mantras and different
Long-long lines and so how theywork scientifically.
What is it about them thatactually work?
And so obviously, ohm is one ofthe Really big ones, and they
were talking about the threedifferent letters or the sounds.
(22:52):
Right, they come with that, andthose are the only Three that
you can make without your tongue, like they're the three that
are the essential Sounds that ahuman can make, and so I just
found that Fascinating, alsojust kind of digging in and
learning a little bit more.
But that's the universal thingthat all humans, no matter what,
(23:14):
can make, and I just that wasfascinating.
On the second related piece ofthat, how much did it hurt?
Because I've been thinkingabout getting one on my spine?
Speaker 1 (23:25):
Yeah, so it's pretty small on the back of my neck and
it definitely it hurt, butwasn't as bad as the one on my
ribs or the one on my foot theone on the foot hurt by the
worst okay, so I have a hitslash rib one, so, okay, great,
it's about it's about the sameas that.
Yeah, good, good, great.
My next one.
(23:46):
I'm gonna get another one.
I'm gonna get a phoenix on mythigh.
I'm really excited for that.
It's gonna be the only onethat's Really bright and
colorful red orange, you know,yellow.
I'm gonna have some teal inthere and it's really actually
in honor of my book and myhealing journey and Rising from
the ashes of my former formerself.
(24:08):
So I'm very excited for thatnext one.
I I love it.
Speaker 2 (24:11):
When did that happen?
Speaker 1 (24:12):
You will get new to get one, cheryl, who knows yeah,
it won't, it's not going tohappen.
Speaker 2 (24:16):
Trust me, it's not going to happen.
Speaker 3 (24:18):
Yeah, mine will be teensy-tiny, like I said, if it
ever happened.
So, but I love that and it wasfunny because I I because Eileen
resonates very much with thePhoenix, so I always thought
that the two of you would getalong really well.
So I'm glad like three of uskind of got together for this.
I want to go back to Tiffanyfor a little bit and then we'll.
(24:39):
We'll move on to other things,but one of the things that I'm
always fascinated by is theshould or what it could have.
You know and it's not so much aregret, but it's if you could
travel back in time and talk toyour younger self, like, what
advice would you give to her andwhat would you be sassing
(25:03):
Tiffany about at that time?
Speaker 1 (25:06):
Yeah, I would probably.
If I could tell my younger selfsome advice, I would say get
into therapy sooner so that youcould identify Tiffany as not
yourself, as knowing that thatis not you.
I used to really identify withthat voice in the head, and now
I see the difference.
You know, I I understand thatthat voice is not my true self.
(25:30):
I would definitely say starttherapy now, start yoga right
now.
I would definitely say stopstop drinking and doing drugs
sooner.
Right, I live a sober lifestylenow, and that's been many years
, but I could have certainlydone that sooner.
Yes, it's kind of funny.
It's like all.
(25:50):
The place where I am now,though, is like a beautiful
place, and I don't think I'd bewhere I am now if I took away
all those pieces of my past.
You know, it's almost like Ihad to have Tiffany be loud in
my head for so long, and I hadto deal with all the
circumstances that surroundeddrugs and alcohol in my life,
(26:11):
and all of that stuff got me tothis place.
You know where I where I neededhealing, but then that created
the healing process which got mehere, and I love where I am now
, and I wouldn't trade that foranything.
So, yeah, I guess.
I guess the only advice wouldbe be more present.
It's interesting.
Speaker 2 (26:32):
Yeah, it's interesting.
I just today heard this, so itresonates from what you're
talking about.
Someone said Simon Bowen well,some fantastic work.
But one of the things Keith hassaid is that life in your past
can either be wins, losses orlessons.
(26:55):
The difference between lessonsand losses is how you view them,
and so I just like yep, yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:04):
I'm so on board with that.
Everything is a lesson, andthat's, and that's really what
the whole book is about.
Every lesson that I took fromevery circumstance yeah,
absolutely what was the name ofthat I'm going to write Simon
Bowen.
Yeah, you're right, cheryl, meand Eileen definitely have a lot
(27:26):
of things in common.
Speaker 3 (27:28):
You sure do, you sure do.
Yeah, I am yeah again.
When I read your book I waslike my goodness, I felt like,
you know, you and Eileen couldconnect on a few things.
Especially, eileen is my friendwho is the question asker, so I
loved that and she's, you know,I don't mean to talk about you
(27:51):
and third person, I lead likeI'm not here, yeah, like just
yeah, lottie enough, but yeahit's.
You know, I love the questionsin the book.
You wrote in such a way that itwas almost like there were
cliffhangers to get you to thenext section and I was like I,
(28:11):
you know, the hooks on the thebook were phenomenal.
I mean, there was a momentwhere I was like, and then what
happened?
I'm like you have to focus thatthis is a person's real life
story and this is not fiction.
This is not a cliffhanger, butthis is somebody's real life
story and these real thingshappen to you and you had a lot
of life thrown at you at a youngage, for sure.
Right, what would you consideryour happy place?
(28:34):
Now, you know, is there a placethat you'd like to travel to?
Is you have a place that youwould like to travel to?
Is you have a favoritedestination place that you can
that you find your inner child,your inner happy?
Like what does that, what doesthat kind of look like?
Speaker 1 (28:49):
Yeah, that's a great question.
I love that question andthere's a few places that jump
to my mind immediately.
When you first started askingthe question, my mind went to my
yoga mat wherever that is, andyou know, just being in that
place of of connection withmyself and presence.
You know again, wherever that is, but on my yoga mat.
(29:11):
But then you know, when you said, like you know, happy place it,
it made me think of thismeditation that I did once that
I actually put in the book,where it's like an insight
meditation where you visualizegoing up into the clouds and
then coming back down and youget to decide where to land and
in the meditation.
The first time I was taught thatmeditation, where I decided to
(29:35):
land that first time wasactually on Bridge Street in
Phoenixville with my husband andmy dog, and I remember we were
in a group setting and everyonewent around and shared where
they landed in their meditationand people were like underwater
in Atlantis, people were on thebeach in this beautiful place
and and I was like I was in myhometown down Main Street, which
(29:57):
is hilarious because I reallydo just.
I love this town, I love mylife, I love my husband, I love
my dog, like I just love whereI'm at.
So this is definitely my happyplace.
Is is where I am right now,which is, I realized, saying it
sounds kind of corny, but I'mjust so grateful.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
That's amazing.
Yeah, so I have a little.
So, as Cheryl said, I come upwith a lot of different
questions and stuff and I can'thelp it.
And as you were talking, thiscame up.
So I'm curious one.
First and foremost love, love,love the way that you've
structured the book and I thinkit's fantastic.
Devil's advocate, because thisis so.
(30:40):
My father was also a computerperson, math guy and made us
constant.
Both my parents are teachers,so they were constantly like
well, how do you think about itfrom this side, and how do you
think about it from this side?
So Is there any part of youthat might have wanted to
control the narrative with thequestions that you asked at the
(31:02):
end of the different chapters?
to keep it in a way that wouldallow them to take what you took
from going through some of thereflections that you did.
Speaker 1 (31:11):
Yeah, oh, I bet I did .
I bet I totally did, becauseeach chapter right, whatever
story I told, I took a lessonfrom, and then there's prompts
were based on the chapter right.
So you know, for example, thefirst chapter is all about I had
a speech impediment as a kid,which is why I didn't talk,
which is why I wrote everythingdown.
(31:32):
And so the questions are likewhat were your like, how did you
communicate as a kid, you know?
So it definitely ties to thetimeline of life.
There's a lot of when you werethis age that I'm in, when you
were in high school, when youwere in, you know, there was
different questions around whenyou were at that age.
How did you handle thatsituation?
(31:55):
So they definitely wereprompted based on my story.
For sure, there was definitelytrying to impart the lesson that
I took, right?
Speaker 2 (32:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
So, yeah, no, there was definitely guided.
I would think, Wouldn't you say, Cheryl, that all the questions
were guided towards?
Speaker 3 (32:13):
that.
Oh sure, like you definitely.
You know, I viewed each one ofyour sections of your book as
almost like a parable with acliffhanger, and then, when you
got to the meditation, it wasvery geared toward, you know,
certain movements that wouldmove towards certain themes like
(32:33):
gratitude and breathing, and,you know, calming your mind and
all of those things, but alsothose questions make you reflect
on the story that you hadshared and also like not putting
yourself in the same positionthat you were in, because there
(32:54):
are some things that I couldn'timagine putting myself in, but
there are other things in termsof, like, I always go back to
Tiffany, right, it's because Ihave.
You know, there are times whereI feel like the imposter
syndrome is absolutely cripplingfor me, and I can't tell you
how many people have told me,like, get out of your own head
and just go do it, and I feellike a lot of times Lottie kind
(33:17):
of like yanks me back and islike maybe don't do that, like I
don't think this is time, likethink about what you're doing.
And you know my stuff is likeyou know, you explain other
things to people and people likego, go get it.
And I'm like why doesn't Lottietalk to me that way?
And I'm sure Tiffany does thesame thing.
Like you're thinking likeTiffany, what's up?
(33:38):
Like why are you not talking tome that way?
Yeah, I think for me it's justseeing your progression Because,
again, like I said, you had alot of life happen to you and I
don't want to give too much awayin this podcast.
I want people to read this bookbecause I think it's an
important.
I think it's a really importantjourney towards understanding
(33:59):
not only your healing journey,but also having people feel less
alone in their own journeys.
And you know, you found ways.
You know, therapy, your youthyoga, sharing your story with
others, helping other childrenand young adults kind of
(34:20):
understand, like from yourperspective, how they can heal.
I thought all of that wasreally wonderful in the book.
So, yeah, that was along-awaited version of saying
yes, that's exactly what I sawin the book.
Just thinking about all ofthese things Again, a lot of
life happened to you and youalso said you took certain
(34:41):
things out of the book whereyou're like people don't need to
know that Was there.
Do you have in there a chapterthat you're most proud of?
Speaker 1 (34:53):
That's a lovely question.
I don't know, I haven't thoughtabout them.
The whole thing's my baby.
I haven't thought aboutbreaking into pieces.
That's so interesting.
Yeah, maybe just the lastchapter, perhaps because that's
(35:14):
where I am right now in my life.
It's really funny.
Ending it was hard because it'slike, and here I am today, how
do you end the book when it's amemoir and you're still living
your life and I just turned 40?
Yeah, it was just very that wasactually the toughest part.
But yeah, so maybe the lastchapter, because it definitely
(35:35):
kind of showcased how living alife of healing can look Like.
I'm in a very good place.
I feel I struggle every singleday and I know how to handle it.
That's the beauty.
Every single day there's newdifficult things that happen,
(35:55):
but I feel I'm able and capableof handling it in a way that I
definitely was not able tohandle in the past.
Speaker 2 (36:03):
And what a great.
I mean I don't know.
So often in especially Westerncultures, with the Hollywood
ending and different stuff,people are either good or bad.
That's how we hear it.
We hear it in the news, wherethis person is a horrid, tragic
story of whatever and there's noredemption but there's no
ability to truly be human inthat and it sounds like just the
(36:28):
dichotomy of past to presentright, just the growth and the
change that can happen over thecourse of a lifetime, and you
still have more to go right, andI think we don't talk about
that enough, that it's not likethis isn't just the one story.
This is an entire lifetime thatebbs and flows and moves and we
(36:51):
constantly get a chance todefine who we are today.
It's not always the stuff fromour past that needs to define
what it is and who we are rightnow.
So I just I think it's reallyinteresting and fascinating and
wonderful to kind of share anexample of how that can grow
through someone's lifetime andhopefully help a lot of people
(37:12):
If they're younger and maybeyou're on a path that hasn't
necessarily been the mostbeneficial for them to see this.
This, this meet today, doesn'thave to be this meet in five 10,
20, 40, whatever years you know.
So yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (37:28):
Yeah, change is possible and it's the reason.
The reason we're here is tolike, learn and grow and change
and evolve.
Right Like that.
I truly think we are put onthis earth.
It's part of my spiritualunderstanding, in my faith, is
we are put on this earth tofigure out life lessons, to
learn to grow, to evolve.
(37:49):
Like that's it, and like youknow that's that's how the book
ends is like, okay, I'm stilllearning and growing, see you
later.
This is where I'm at now.
It doesn't end that abruptly,but that's the end.
But yeah, it's definitely.
It's so interesting to thinkabout.
Someone said recently like youknow, you have a legacy now,
(38:11):
like you could die tomorrow andpeople still know your life
story and well, that's a morbidway to think about it.
Speaker 2 (38:18):
But yeah.
Speaker 1 (38:18):
I guess that's true.
So yeah, no matter when I maygo, I have these stories that
hopefully can help people, maybeeven after I'm no longer there,
to share my stories incommunity.
You know that hope maybe thelarger community can still not
like that makes it sound like anego.
Speaker 2 (38:39):
That's not what I'm trying to say.
Speaker 1 (38:41):
No, no, no, I'm continuing the lessons and the
learning, because that's whatit's all about.
Speaker 2 (38:47):
It is, it absolutely is, and I don't know, but you
know, as a young kid you justknow I'd, my parents aren't
right, nobody older knowsanything.
And then you're like shit, yep,if only I had and some of that,
if you have to go through ityourself.
However, like Cheryl was saying, they're not feeling so alone
(39:10):
and that is incredible and Ithink for me that's why,
whatever type of art form it isthat you have, whether it's
music or written prose or, youknow, painting or whatever there
is a, there is an element ofthe human and me is now being
shared with the human and you,and it's so incredible to be
(39:33):
able to have that out there, toconnect with someone else, so
they don't feel so alone.
There's always going to besomething that they that speaks
to them in a way that notanything else might have, and
the fact that you were able toget that out is going to touch
other people in a way that theyneeded to hear it.
That was beautifully said, thankyou, I wrote it down Just
(39:54):
kidding, but it's true, I mean.
I mean Cheryl knows and theaudience probably knows to so
much extent now, but like I havemy mom's a musician and stuff,
and so it was always.
Like art is incrediblyimportant in life and I just I
feel that you know, if I'm downand I really need to listen to
some music, that's going to helpa lot of people even feel the
(40:17):
sadness.
Right, not necessarily gettingme out of that, but just to feel
that sadness, to know thatthere are someone else can
really understand what is goingon at this moment with me is I
mean, there's just no way todescribe that and art is the way
to do that.
So yeah.
Speaker 1 (40:36):
Absolutely.
Speaker 3 (40:37):
Yeah, it's interesting.
I know, when I'm down I like togo to a bookstore Like that's
and we happen to have a majorchain near us and my husband had
to go pick up a CD.
And I went there and I saidcool, I'll go get a book.
So anyway, I purchased five.
Speaker 2 (40:56):
So I sound right.
Speaker 3 (40:59):
So I came home and eerily like devoured one of the
poetry books that I hadpurchased when I had a small
break during lunch.
So yeah, I agree with you.
I think there's somethingimportant about.
We just had this conversationwith Eileen's publisher,
actually a while ago, becauseshe had posited to us do you
(41:20):
think, do you like audio booksor physical books better?
I am, I'm a fan of both, but Idefinitely prefer the physical
book, and mostly because I folksthat know here I have a little
free library and it gives megreat joy when I see kids come
(41:41):
by and they grab a book, becausethat's something.
It's almost like a gift given,right?
And I feel that's the way yourbook is, is it?
It's a gift given memoirs.
Somebody had given us a quote awhile ago and I'm gonna bungle
the quote.
It's about something aboutmemoirs, our way to see
ourselves, and I feel like thatagain, I couldn't relate to all
(42:05):
of your story, but I couldrelate, certainly, to the fast,
certain facets of it, and it waslovely to feel not alone in
that moment and also feel allthose things that sometimes that
gets lost in the workday, likeempathy and hope and kindness,
(42:26):
and I wanted to personally say Iam grateful that your book is
out, because I think that peoplewill get a lot of that from you
.
Speaker 1 (42:34):
Thank you so much, cheryl.
That really means a lot.
I really appreciate hearingthat and, yeah, I mean that's
been the most common feedbackI've heard.
Actually, is this idea of metoo, right?
Yeah, you know I can relate, orthat's similar to my story, and
, of course, not all parts of it, but yeah, that's.
The whole part of humanity islike we all experience the same
(42:58):
life struggles, whether they invarying degrees and in varying
circumstances, but they're allthe same struggles.
Sure, you know it's fear,mm-hmm In all the forms, in all
the forms.
So, yeah, thank you for sharingthat.
I appreciate it.
Speaker 2 (43:15):
You're welcome and I mean, I'm not that I wasn't
going to have the book.
I want it now.
How can I order it to make surethat I have it signed?
Speaker 1 (43:24):
Yeah, so if you want it signed, you can just tell me
your address and I'll send you acopy.
We can make that happen.
But yeah, it's on Amazon andit's on Barnes and Noblecom, and
then it's also well, you're notlocal.
I was going to say it's not abookstores, but I did go into
the local bookstores and Isigned all the copies that were
(43:44):
in there, it's so awesome.
That was super fun, so yeah,but I can send you a copy for
sure.
Speaker 2 (43:51):
Ok, I'll make sure to order it in some of our local
bookstores here also, so thatthey can see it and have it come
sort of so.
Speaker 3 (43:56):
I know that helps.
Speaker 2 (43:57):
Oh, of course, Absolutely.
So I know we're kind of we'regetting close to the hour, and I
don't I mean Cheryl, thishappens more often than not that
we're like we could probablykeep talking for another few
hours, if I'm being honest, yes,and we're trying to be
conscientious of other people'stime.
So, with that being said, when Iget to our sort of last
(44:22):
infamous question is the this ishappening.
So for us, right, it is thisfeeling of something that that
we get, that we know is on ourhearts, that that we won't feel
is, you know, filled until we'veable to, to complete it or or
(44:46):
to do it.
This podcast came because ofthose three words, many other
examples that you know it's notnecessarily a bucket list type
of thing, but it's, it's a callto action and call to our heart
and our purpose.
So, you know, do you haveanything that you feel that this
(45:07):
is happening is applicable to?
Are there more books?
So, is there anything else kindof coming out next or things
that you're focusing on that youknow this is happening.
Speaker 1 (45:18):
Great question.
There are no more books insideof my soul.
I will say that.
Speaker 2 (45:24):
And you know that you just know it.
Speaker 1 (45:27):
Nope, that was, that was all I had.
That was everything, but no, afew.
Two things actually come tomind.
One is I do want to continuewith these learning circles that
I've been doing and trying toreach more people with them.
I think gathering in communityand being able to just share
(45:47):
what's on your heart is sopowerful, and you know whether
we use my own book or whether weuse other books.
Speaker 2 (45:53):
you know I I still want to keep reading a million
other books, because that's whatI love to do.
Speaker 1 (45:58):
So I want to be able to talk about what I, what we
can learn and take from thoseother people's stories.
So yeah, the learning circles Iwant to do more of.
I've been doing them once amonth for like a fall semester
and a spring semester, but Ithink I can, you know, add in
others and try to make that, tryto reach more people that way.
(46:18):
But the other thing that cameto mind is actually work related
.
So I work in a local college andI'm really excited that I just
got a promotion and oh yeah,thank you, and they're allowing
me to hire someone else to workalongside me, and I'm really
excited to see the growth thereand to be able to like work with
(46:38):
someone and mentors you know, anew professional and really
trying to make some big changesat work.
You know, as in the intro itsaid, I work with young people
around alcohol and other drugsand health and wellness.
I really try to be, you know,an advocate for healthy living
and healthy lifestyles and it'sreally important for young
people to try to find some ofthese coping skills as early as
(47:01):
possible, right, and so I'mreally excited to see what, what
work we can do with systematicchange.
I think for a long time in mycareer I was working on
programming events, hosting ayoga workshop, hosting you know,
hosting trainings, but now I'mable, with the promotion, I'm
able to think more big pictureand I'm able to think about how
(47:25):
we can actually make change atthe root causes and at the
systems level.
So I'm really excited to diveinto what all that means for for
our campus.
Speaker 2 (47:35):
That's amazing and the stuff that will change lives
.
Speaker 1 (47:40):
Yeah, I think so.
Congratulations, I think so.
Thank you Very excited Sweet.
Speaker 3 (47:45):
Sweet Katie.
How can people connect with youon social media or elsewhere?
Speaker 1 (47:51):
Yeah, so definitely follow me on insta.
That's where most of my mystuff will be, and it's Katie
being wellness.
I'm also Katie being wellnessat on YouTube A lot of the
meditations that are in the bookI have.
I read them on YouTube so thatyou know you can actually close
your eyes and enjoy themeditation rather than reading
(48:13):
it and trying to follow along.
So definitely check those out,and my website is be an agent
for change dot com or beingagent for change.
Speaker 2 (48:23):
Oh my gosh Even better and I love you even more
now.
Also, I'm definitely going onto your YouTube right after this
, because I feel like I coulduse one of those meditations, so
thank you, check it out.
Speaker 1 (48:35):
Thank you so much.
I appreciate it and it's.
I've had so much fun chattingwith you all, so I really
appreciate taking your time andenjoying good conversation over
a cup of tea on a Friday night.
This has been lovely.
Speaker 3 (48:49):
That's awesome.
Thank you so much and thank youfor joining us.
This concludes our episode ofyou.
Only go once.
Take care everyone Bye.
Hi y'all.
It's Katie being here.
I hope when you look back onlife, you have no regrets,
because everything that you'vedone good, bad or indifferent
has led you to who you are todayand because you only go once.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Welcome, welcome listeners.
Welcome back to another episodeof you Only Go Once, also
affectionately known as Yogo.
I am here tonight, at my leangrimes, with my fantastic
co-host and friend that Ihaven't seen and talked to for a
little while because that'sthat we're not working together
anymore, but we get to spendthese amazing nights together
(00:36):
and meet these incredible people.
So, cheryl, I will let youintroduce our guest for tonight.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
Thanks, Eileen.
Katie Bean is the author ofFragile Thoughts, a healing
memoir which is written as botha personal narrative and
practical guide on healing.
She's an educator and spendsher nine to five talking with
college students about how tolive healthy and happy lives,
and spends the rest of her timetrying to listen to her own
advice.
She loves being outdoors, is ayoga student and teacher and an
(01:04):
avid writer and reader.
She also runs learning circles,which are book clubs with a
self-study twist.
She lives with her husband,John, and dog Charlie in
Phoenixville, Katie Bean welcome, hi.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
thank you so so much for having me.
I'm very excited to be here.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
Katie, we wanted to talk to you a little bit about
you, what your life goals are,how you're living this life
right now.
But first I think we want tostart with your talking a little
bit about your book and mostlywhat made you write your book
and your memoir now versusanother time.
Speaker 1 (01:47):
Yeah, that's a great question.
It really has been a childhooddream to publish a book.
So ever since I was a littlekid, I was making my own little
books and writing stories, andmy mom would like staple them
together in my little pages thatI would write and draw.
So I've always loved writingsince I was a kid, and so it's
(02:08):
just always just been in theback of my mind as like a bucket
list dream goal of publishingsomething I used to think a book
of poetry, maybe.
I used to think maybe I wouldwrite short stories and publish
them, but it actually turnedinto being my memoir that I
ended up publishing and why Ichose that was really.
(02:29):
My own healing journey over thepast many years has been
powerful, life changing, andeach time I share what I've
learned or what I've, how I'vegrown through therapy, through
journaling, through vulnerablestorytelling and community,
through yoga all of those thingstogether Every time I share the
(02:51):
techniques I've used and howit's helped me learn and grow,
people seem to be impacted bythat, you know, and I've gotten
a lot of good response like, wow, that's really a powerful story
, or you should tell more peoplethat you should keep sharing
that.
And so I was really motivatedwhen I started the learning
circle that you mentioned in myintro.
I started that during COVID,that book club, and during that
(03:14):
book club it was just.
I mean, it was amazing it was.
It was like group therapyreally, more group therapy, less
book club.
But we definitely talked about,you know, we would read the
stories, a lot of memoirs and alot of spiritual type self help
books and in those learningcircles we would use the
(03:36):
author's story as kind of ajumping off point for us to talk
about our own lives and how wein our own lives have similar or
different experiences and thatkind of process.
I was like this is exactly whatI think I need to do.
It just kind of hit me, so Iwrote my story and then at the
end of every chapter I havejournal prompts and yoga based
(03:57):
activities to kind of help thereader take my story and then,
you know, see how it connects totheir own life.
And so it's truly built forbook clubs.
This book and meant for peopleto read in community and in
conversation with one another.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
I mean, that's beautiful.
I'm definitely going to have toget it now.
And have you approached bookclubs with this To?
I mean, like I know, there'sonline spaces and things to
promote the book and everything.
So sorry, I just get mymarketing business head coming
on, so I appreciate that weshould totally chat offline on
(04:35):
more ideas.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
I haven't done that.
I am going to because I still Ido this monthly learning circle
.
It's through my yoga studio.
We do a survey every summer forwhat are going to be the books
for the next like year, theacademic year, and of course my
lovely people have chosen havechosen my book to be the first
one in September.
So I will be doing it for them.
(04:58):
But yeah, maybe there's otherways to try to get utilize it in
that kind of space.
It's definitely made for that.
It's made to be read anddiscussed in community for sure,
definitely.
Speaker 2 (05:09):
Well, I know a book club that Cheryl's a part of and
maybe could suggest it.
So yes so as you're goingthrough writing this book.
Obviously I mean with whatCheryl has written, with her own
, and with what you've done, Ithink with many authors.
Right, there's a significantamount of self reflection and
(05:31):
introspection that goes intoespecially writing memoir, right
?
Was there something that justsort of surprised you or that
you found most difficult toreally approach in terms of
getting it from here, from yourbrain and your heart out onto to
paper?
(05:52):
And and how did you get throughthe other side of that?
Speaker 1 (05:59):
Hmm, Great question.
Yeah, what's interesting aboutthis book is because I've been
writing and journaling my wholelife.
A lot of the book was myjournal entries that.
I've rewritten into, you know,to create this book.
So it was very interestingprocess to like go into my
basement and open up these youknow Tupperware bins and pull
(06:22):
out some journals from gradeschool and high school.
I mean it was.
It was wild actually.
The whole process was powerful.
I remember there were times Iwould go down the basement to go
through stuff and then fivehours later I'm like, wow, I
really have to go upstairs now,like I would just get so wrapped
into it.
It brought back a lot ofemotions, of course.
(06:43):
It brought back a lot ofmemories and it led me to more
journaling and more discovery.
And it was really interestingbecause through journaling,
through writing, I have foundconnections that I didn't
realize existed.
So like, as I was looking backon the past and then I was
writing about maybe the lastfive years or so of my life, I
(07:04):
would say, wow, that thing in mypast actually maybe relates to
how I respond to things now.
It was, it was so therapeutic.
So it was really interestingprocess for me and then to turn
it over to you know, with mypublisher, to turn it over to a
developmental editor to havesomeone judge it.
(07:26):
Yeah, that was hard you know,but that you know you need that
to help formulate it into areadable story, and so it was
really helpful to have you knowall of the people involved in on
the editing team, and therewere some chapters I left out to
be very honest.
(07:46):
There were chapters that it waslike the whole world doesn't
need to know every detail.
So, but it was hard becausethere's there's some heavy stuff
in there.
It's basically a book of allthe trauma and heavy stuff I've
been through and what I'velearned from it and how I've
grown from it and so, yeah, it'sdefinitely scary to put that
out in the world, not just tostrangers, not so much to my
(08:10):
mother.
A little more scary, you know,a little more scary to the
people who who were involved inthe stories that are in the book
and and to my, my boss, to my,you know, my colleagues.
Like, oh, you're going to readabout a lot of things.
So that's been a little scary,but I've only received positive
feedback so far.
So that's been been nice.
(08:31):
That's fantastic.
When did it come out?
It came out in May, mid-may.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
Okay, got it.
That's amazing.
Yeah, it's.
Oh, she had the vulnerabilitypiece of becoming a published
author in whatever way, shape orform that exists, whether it's
in a book, whether it's, youknow, blogging out to the world
or you know some article thatyou wrote for a newspaper,
(08:58):
whatever it is.
The vulnerability that you haveto have to allow for that to
enter the world is incredible.
And I mean, have you, was thatsomething you found sort of
through this process, like?
Speaker 3 (09:14):
for me.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
I wasn't ready.
It's at a point in my life tobe able to put something like
that out into the world.
It was through a lot of thework that I've been doing and
I'm still doing.
Like let's be real, right, ofcourse, me too, would you say.
If you had released it fiveyears ago, would it have been
something that you would havebeen able to do?
Speaker 1 (09:36):
Yeah, definitely not.
I think it was birthed when itwas ready.
Yeah, right, you know, I thinkit was all just very
serendipitous, everything thathappened, that led to it.
There was a lot ofsynchronicities that were just
falling into place.
I think it was meant to happenwhen it was meant to happen.
(09:56):
It's also part of my faith.
I believe that boldheartedly.
So I think that was a part ofit.
It just kind of rolled into, itjust happened, I mean.
And the vulnerability piece ofit you know I was nervous, of
course, about the storiesthemselves, about the actual
experience.
I was also nervous that maybepeople would think I'm not, it's
not well written, like it's nota good piece of work.
(10:18):
That was another fear.
So it's like two types ofvulnerabilities there.
You know, is it any good on topof wow?
These are heavy stories andthere's many levels of fear.
Right, there's all kinds offailure that you're afraid of as
you dig down into that.
But the vulnerability itself iswhat has helped me heal from so
(10:39):
many of the things I've beenthrough.
Yeah, when you can sharesomething with someone and they
can, whether they can relate orwhether they can empathize, you
know that's powerful.
And when you can unveilyourself to others, that's
really huge.
So the vulnerability itself hadbeen happening for a while in
my own journey and this was justa natural extension of that.
Speaker 3 (11:01):
Well, I can attest to how well written it is because
it is a phenomenal book and Iwill say I'm also grateful that
the yoga exercise that you putin there are some things that
you could potentially do fromyour chair or standing up, and I
used to call yoga classes fallsdown a lot, because that's
exactly what I did.
(11:22):
I have no skill set in the gracedepartment at all, so I found
these very, very soothing at theend because some of the
chapters that you have are veryheady.
So you've talked a little bitabout vulnerability and I will
say one of my favorite chaptersis the one where you talk about
imposter syndrome and thatvulnerability and naming your
(11:43):
inner voice, and her voice isTiffany and that just made me
feel right, because you neverthink to name your.
You know, often people willtell you name your fear and
that's like half.
You know that's part of thebattle of naming your fear and
then you know facing it head onand I had never thought to name,
(12:04):
like the inner voice, the oneof self doubt and the hesitation
and all of that.
Give it a name.
That was one of my favoritechapters because you're
generally also talked about likehow do you deal with imposter
syndrome.
Have you given, like, try togive your inner voice a name?
And what would you tell thatinner voice?
Speaker 2 (12:23):
So I guess, Cheryl, this is real quick then.
Did you then take that advice?
Yeah, I did, I totally did yeah.
Speaker 3 (12:32):
Yeah, it is because I had like three names rolling
around in my head.
Speaker 2 (12:37):
No, I love that.
I'm sorry, I'm just so curious.
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (12:40):
So I love it.
Yeah, I.
What did I name her?
I named her Lottie.
I think that was the name thatI gave her.
Even though it's a very sweetname, I think that there was,
like you know, Lottie could betough as nails, so you know I
gave her that name, like you'rea Lottie in my head right now.
(13:02):
So no offense to any of thecharlots or the Lotties out
there, it's just that's the namethat I came up with and I
thought, all right, you knowyou're a Lottie right now, Calm
down, Like let me get this done.
Eileen, what would you nameyour inner voice?
Speaker 2 (13:17):
Oh my gosh.
I mean, I haven't had time tothink about this.
You just popped it on me, I didI popped that one on you.
Yes, I mean, I'll be honest, Ihad an immediate reaction to it
and it was Bertha and I don'treally totally.
It seems very overbearing andlike want you to be on the right
track and like stick and stayin the like safe zone of stuff.
(13:40):
So yeah, I'm just gonna have togo with it.
That was my first reaction,probably the most right one.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
Yeah, I love it.
Bertha was the name of my firstcar.
Love it?
Yeah, she was.
She was old and not veryreliable.
Speaker 2 (13:56):
Great.
Speaker 3 (13:58):
It's awesome.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
I can't rely on mine.
So you know that's total.
Thanks, Makes sense, yeah.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
And no offense to anyone named Tiffany right.
That has nothing to do with it.
That technique was you knowfrom my therapist from years ago
and it really proved helpful.
There's a great book calledChatter by Ethan Cross, and
Chatter talks a lot about themind stuff, right Just like the
inner voice and the inner criticand he talks about.
(14:26):
there's a lot of research aroundit too that that proves that
naming yourself, naming yourinner voice, gives like space
between it.
It gives objectivity to thevoice and the voice starts
saying mean things to you.
You can, you know, I kind oflaugh.
I'll say in my mind like shutup Tiffany, and then that's like
ridiculous.
So then I laugh and then I cankind of like get out of that
(14:47):
cycle of anxiety or fear orwhatever is you know going on in
my mind.
But yeah, that's definitely atechnique from my therapist.
Can't take credit for that one.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
No, I love it, so it is.
So you are also.
You also teach yoga.
Is this your yoga instructor?
So I'm curious, because Iremember I also took yoga and
we'll just leave it at that.
But I did it for a little whileand I know one of the things
that I struggled with,especially then, because I did
(15:17):
it in my early 20s and it wasthat inner voice right and when
you're in Shavasana and it'slike I should do this and this
and this and these things arepopping in your head and it's
just like this doesn't stop andyour inner voice keeps going.
And have you ever brought thatconcept then into the practice,
to have those conversations withwhoever you're working with?
Speaker 1 (15:38):
Yeah.
So I mean definitely that's apart.
I mean, the part of yoga I lovemost is in yoga sutras from
Patanjali, like the book written, you know, thousands of years
ago.
The very first line, the veryfirst sutra or maybe it's 1.2,
says yoga.
The purpose of yoga is to stealthe fluctuations of the mind.
(15:59):
That's what it's about.
That is literally the purposeof yoga.
So, yes, I do bring that in andin a lot of my conversations.
I certainly use that myselfwhen I'm taking classes.
That's what it's for.
That's the whole purpose.
It's definitely not so that wecan make pretzels with our
bodies.
It's definitely not so that wecan be flexible and sure, we
(16:20):
build flexibility, we buildstrength, absolutely, and
they're all a byproduct ofgetting.
They're the means to the end,the end being stealing the mind
and being able to meditate andconnect with spirit.
Really.
Speaker 2 (16:35):
And I'm actually more open to trying and implementing
some of the yoga because I'vedone a lot more meditation
practices and breathing work now, because I'm ready to quiet
right, like in my early 20s itwas like, oh, I got to go, go go
, I have to achieve, I have todo all these things, like I'm
not, I'm not standing still,yeah.
(17:00):
So I'm actually much more intoand able to approach in those
things now a little bit later inlife, because it doesn't feel
so, it's not stagnant in the waythat I thought it was, it's
actually Still in the way thatit is being completely present
and I'm much more understandingof what that means now.
Speaker 1 (17:23):
Exactly.
You should come in and practicewith us.
Nectar yoga studio inPhoenixville.
Speaker 2 (17:27):
I would.
I'm in Washington State,however, so it might be a little
hard you can come anyway,that's fine, yes.
Speaker 3 (17:34):
Yep, well, I may be visiting you, katie, because I
think I would like to hear yourversion of yoga versus Some of
the other things that I've seen.
I tried like a 30-day Yoga andthey just got progressively
harder and I was like I'll try,and then by the end I was like
I'll just be in child's pose forthe rest of the session.
Thank you, yeah.
(17:57):
So, going back to your book,your life, everything it was,
honestly, you are such a calmsoul, as I see you reading some
of the book, though I was reallykind of surprised at some of
the the stuff, of some of thestories that were in there,
including some impulsive thingsthat you did.
(18:19):
So if you had to list, or youhad to name, the one impulsive
thing that you've done, what wasit and what did you learn from
it?
Speaker 1 (18:30):
I was going to talk about my impulsivity of like
getting my first tattoo.
Speaker 3 (18:34):
That is actually the one that I was focusing on in my
head.
So, yes, that was the one thatI was thinking of because
Eileen's got tattoos.
I am Tattoo free.
Maybe we'll get thereeventually with one, maybe a
tiny dot or something.
But yeah, that was actually thestory that I was thinking,
because that one made me Justabsolutely crack up.
(18:57):
So would you mind sharing thatstory, because that one is, like
my, one of my favorites fromthe book and and how do you talk
about all that stuff?
Speaker 1 (19:06):
So yeah.
So one of the, yeah, mostimpulsive things was definitely
getting a tattoo right when Iturned 18, and Not thinking it
through at all, just thinking itwould be fun, thinking it would
be funny, and I decided to getmy initials KB in green and
black leopard print on my ashcheek.
(19:27):
And I had to get it therebecause I couldn't let my
parents see it, of course, yep,and they were like you better
not ever get a tattoo.
That like.
I knew that that was theirvalues.
They taught me that and Icouldn't let them see it.
So it's still not visible likein a bikini, right like it's.
It's right on the cheek, and itwas a pretty stupid choice.
(19:49):
It was definitely not.
It was not well thought out.
I thought it would be funny andyou know, the truth is I have a
lot of tattoos.
Now I have five, I'm about toget my six and I love tattoos.
I think they're great, butEvery tattoo since has been very
thought out.
I've I've thought for a longtime, maybe even a full year,
(20:12):
about what I want in theplacement and then, after a year
, if I still want it, I thinkfor about another year and then,
if I still want it.
Maybe I'll start Setting up,finding the person I want to do
it and designing it, which mighttake another year.
So all my other tattoos havetaken years and that one took
about 25 minutes for us all tosay, yeah, that's a great idea,
(20:33):
let's go.
There's a place, y'all justlike.
I had seven friends with me andof course, I'm sitting over the
seat with my pants down becausethey had to get to it and
everyone's taken pictures of mybare ass.
It was just hilarious.
So it was.
It was funny at the time,mm-hmm, and I can still laugh at
(20:54):
it now, but definitelyimpulsive.
Speaker 3 (20:59):
Can you talk about the one that's on the back of
your neck, because that one hasmeaning right?
Speaker 1 (21:03):
Yeah, yeah all the rest have a lot of meaning.
The one on the back of my neckis the ohm symbol in Sanskrit,
the ohm from, from yoga and from.
You know the symbol in Sanskrit, and it has a lot of like
traditional meaning.
I really like it being on theback of my neck because I can't
see it, which to me symbolizeshow I Understand God.
(21:26):
Right, like always there, but Ican't, can't really see it.
And Ohm represents.
I mean, if you, if you askdifferent Yogis and even
different scholars what ohmmeans, you're gonna get a few
different variations.
But ohm is the sound of peace.
Ohm is the sound, the vibrationin which God manifested all
things.
(21:48):
Ohm has a lot of like deepermeaning within the structure of
the symbol itself.
There's three parts of thebottom which are, let's say,
there's a bunch of them waking,dreamless sleep and and sleep.
And then there's, like this I'mmaking hand gestures and no one
(22:08):
can see me.
You know, you know on the radio, but there's like a, an arch,
the very consciousness that kindof separates those states.
And then the doubt at the topis representing God.
So there's a lot of.
I mean, there's whole books onand what it means.
But that's a really briefVersion of how I understand it.
Speaker 2 (22:31):
Yeah, I was reading somewhere recently oh gosh, in
my, my day job, we're talkingabout mantras and different
Long-long lines and so how theywork scientifically.
What is it about them thatactually work?
And so obviously, ohm is one ofthe Really big ones, and they
were talking about the threedifferent letters or the sounds.
(22:52):
Right, they come with that, andthose are the only Three that
you can make without your tongue, like they're the three that
are the essential Sounds that ahuman can make, and so I just
found that Fascinating, alsojust kind of digging in and
learning a little bit more.
But that's the universal thingthat all humans, no matter what,
(23:14):
can make, and I just that wasfascinating.
On the second related piece ofthat, how much did it hurt?
Because I've been thinkingabout getting one on my spine?
Speaker 1 (23:25):
Yeah, so it's pretty small on the back of my neck and
it definitely it hurt, butwasn't as bad as the one on my
ribs or the one on my foot theone on the foot hurt by the
worst okay, so I have a hitslash rib one, so, okay, great,
it's about it's about the sameas that.
Yeah, good, good, great.
My next one.
(23:46):
I'm gonna get another one.
I'm gonna get a phoenix on mythigh.
I'm really excited for that.
It's gonna be the only onethat's Really bright and
colorful red orange, you know,yellow.
I'm gonna have some teal inthere and it's really actually
in honor of my book and myhealing journey and Rising from
the ashes of my former formerself.
(24:08):
So I'm very excited for thatnext one.
I I love it.
Speaker 2 (24:11):
When did that happen?
Speaker 1 (24:12):
You will get new to get one, cheryl, who knows yeah,
it won't, it's not going tohappen.
Speaker 2 (24:16):
Trust me, it's not going to happen.
Speaker 3 (24:18):
Yeah, mine will be teensy-tiny, like I said, if it
ever happened.
So, but I love that and it wasfunny because I I because Eileen
resonates very much with thePhoenix, so I always thought
that the two of you would getalong really well.
So I'm glad like three of uskind of got together for this.
I want to go back to Tiffanyfor a little bit and then we'll.
(24:39):
We'll move on to other things,but one of the things that I'm
always fascinated by is theshould or what it could have.
You know and it's not so much aregret, but it's if you could
travel back in time and talk toyour younger self, like, what
advice would you give to her andwhat would you be sassing
(25:03):
Tiffany about at that time?
Speaker 1 (25:06):
Yeah, I would probably.
If I could tell my younger selfsome advice, I would say get
into therapy sooner so that youcould identify Tiffany as not
yourself, as knowing that thatis not you.
I used to really identify withthat voice in the head, and now
I see the difference.
You know, I I understand thatthat voice is not my true self.
(25:30):
I would definitely say starttherapy now, start yoga right
now.
I would definitely say stopstop drinking and doing drugs
sooner.
Right, I live a sober lifestylenow, and that's been many years
, but I could have certainlydone that sooner.
Yes, it's kind of funny.
It's like all.
(25:50):
The place where I am now,though, is like a beautiful
place, and I don't think I'd bewhere I am now if I took away
all those pieces of my past.
You know, it's almost like Ihad to have Tiffany be loud in
my head for so long, and I hadto deal with all the
circumstances that surroundeddrugs and alcohol in my life,
(26:11):
and all of that stuff got me tothis place.
You know where I where I neededhealing, but then that created
the healing process which got mehere, and I love where I am now
, and I wouldn't trade that foranything.
So, yeah, I guess.
I guess the only advice wouldbe be more present.
It's interesting.
Speaker 2 (26:32):
Yeah, it's interesting.
I just today heard this, so itresonates from what you're
talking about.
Someone said Simon Bowen well,some fantastic work.
But one of the things Keith hassaid is that life in your past
can either be wins, losses orlessons.
(26:55):
The difference between lessonsand losses is how you view them,
and so I just like yep, yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:04):
I'm so on board with that.
Everything is a lesson, andthat's, and that's really what
the whole book is about.
Every lesson that I took fromevery circumstance yeah,
absolutely what was the name ofthat I'm going to write Simon
Bowen.
Yeah, you're right, cheryl, meand Eileen definitely have a lot
(27:26):
of things in common.
Speaker 3 (27:28):
You sure do, you sure do.
Yeah, I am yeah again.
When I read your book I waslike my goodness, I felt like,
you know, you and Eileen couldconnect on a few things.
Especially, eileen is my friendwho is the question asker, so I
loved that and she's, you know,I don't mean to talk about you
(27:51):
and third person, I lead likeI'm not here, yeah, like just
yeah, lottie enough, but yeahit's.
You know, I love the questionsin the book.
You wrote in such a way that itwas almost like there were
cliffhangers to get you to thenext section and I was like I,
(28:11):
you know, the hooks on the thebook were phenomenal.
I mean, there was a momentwhere I was like, and then what
happened?
I'm like you have to focus thatthis is a person's real life
story and this is not fiction.
This is not a cliffhanger, butthis is somebody's real life
story and these real thingshappen to you and you had a lot
of life thrown at you at a youngage, for sure.
Right, what would you consideryour happy place?
(28:34):
Now, you know, is there a placethat you'd like to travel to?
Is you have a place that youwould like to travel to?
Is you have a favoritedestination place that you can
that you find your inner child,your inner happy?
Like what does that, what doesthat kind of look like?
Speaker 1 (28:49):
Yeah, that's a great question.
I love that question andthere's a few places that jump
to my mind immediately.
When you first started askingthe question, my mind went to my
yoga mat wherever that is, andyou know, just being in that
place of of connection withmyself and presence.
You know again, wherever that is, but on my yoga mat.
(29:11):
But then you know, when you said, like you know, happy place it,
it made me think of thismeditation that I did once that
I actually put in the book,where it's like an insight
meditation where you visualizegoing up into the clouds and
then coming back down and youget to decide where to land and
in the meditation.
The first time I was taught thatmeditation, where I decided to
(29:35):
land that first time wasactually on Bridge Street in
Phoenixville with my husband andmy dog, and I remember we were
in a group setting and everyonewent around and shared where
they landed in their meditationand people were like underwater
in Atlantis, people were on thebeach in this beautiful place
and and I was like I was in myhometown down Main Street, which
(29:57):
is hilarious because I reallydo just.
I love this town, I love mylife, I love my husband, I love
my dog, like I just love whereI'm at.
So this is definitely my happyplace.
Is is where I am right now,which is, I realized, saying it
sounds kind of corny, but I'mjust so grateful.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
That's amazing.
Yeah, so I have a little.
So, as Cheryl said, I come upwith a lot of different
questions and stuff and I can'thelp it.
And as you were talking, thiscame up.
So I'm curious one.
First and foremost love, love,love the way that you've
structured the book and I thinkit's fantastic.
Devil's advocate, because thisis so.
(30:40):
My father was also a computerperson, math guy and made us
constant.
Both my parents are teachers,so they were constantly like
well, how do you think about itfrom this side, and how do you
think about it from this side?
So Is there any part of youthat might have wanted to
control the narrative with thequestions that you asked at the
(31:02):
end of the different chapters?
to keep it in a way that wouldallow them to take what you took
from going through some of thereflections that you did.
Speaker 1 (31:11):
Yeah, oh, I bet I did .
I bet I totally did, becauseeach chapter right, whatever
story I told, I took a lessonfrom, and then there's prompts
were based on the chapter right.
So you know, for example, thefirst chapter is all about I had
a speech impediment as a kid,which is why I didn't talk,
which is why I wrote everythingdown.
(31:32):
And so the questions are likewhat were your like, how did you
communicate as a kid, you know?
So it definitely ties to thetimeline of life.
There's a lot of when you werethis age that I'm in, when you
were in high school, when youwere in, you know, there was
different questions around whenyou were at that age.
How did you handle thatsituation?
(31:55):
So they definitely wereprompted based on my story.
For sure, there was definitelytrying to impart the lesson that
I took, right?
Speaker 2 (32:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
So, yeah, no, there was definitely guided.
I would think, Wouldn't you say, Cheryl, that all the questions
were guided towards?
Speaker 3 (32:13):
that.
Oh sure, like you definitely.
You know, I viewed each one ofyour sections of your book as
almost like a parable with acliffhanger, and then, when you
got to the meditation, it wasvery geared toward, you know,
certain movements that wouldmove towards certain themes like
(32:33):
gratitude and breathing, and,you know, calming your mind and
all of those things, but alsothose questions make you reflect
on the story that you hadshared and also like not putting
yourself in the same positionthat you were in, because there
(32:54):
are some things that I couldn'timagine putting myself in, but
there are other things in termsof, like, I always go back to
Tiffany, right, it's because Ihave.
You know, there are times whereI feel like the imposter
syndrome is absolutely cripplingfor me, and I can't tell you
how many people have told me,like, get out of your own head
and just go do it, and I feellike a lot of times Lottie kind
(33:17):
of like yanks me back and islike maybe don't do that, like I
don't think this is time, likethink about what you're doing.
And you know my stuff is likeyou know, you explain other
things to people and people likego, go get it.
And I'm like why doesn't Lottietalk to me that way?
And I'm sure Tiffany does thesame thing.
Like you're thinking likeTiffany, what's up?
(33:38):
Like why are you not talking tome that way?
Yeah, I think for me it's justseeing your progression Because,
again, like I said, you had alot of life happen to you and I
don't want to give too much awayin this podcast.
I want people to read this bookbecause I think it's an
important.
I think it's a really importantjourney towards understanding
(33:59):
not only your healing journey,but also having people feel less
alone in their own journeys.
And you know, you found ways.
You know, therapy, your youthyoga, sharing your story with
others, helping other childrenand young adults kind of
(34:20):
understand, like from yourperspective, how they can heal.
I thought all of that wasreally wonderful in the book.
So, yeah, that was along-awaited version of saying
yes, that's exactly what I sawin the book.
Just thinking about all ofthese things Again, a lot of
life happened to you and youalso said you took certain
(34:41):
things out of the book whereyou're like people don't need to
know that Was there.
Do you have in there a chapterthat you're most proud of?
Speaker 1 (34:53):
That's a lovely question.
I don't know, I haven't thoughtabout them.
The whole thing's my baby.
I haven't thought aboutbreaking into pieces.
That's so interesting.
Yeah, maybe just the lastchapter, perhaps because that's
(35:14):
where I am right now in my life.
It's really funny.
Ending it was hard because it'slike, and here I am today, how
do you end the book when it's amemoir and you're still living
your life and I just turned 40?
Yeah, it was just very that wasactually the toughest part.
But yeah, so maybe the lastchapter, because it definitely
(35:35):
kind of showcased how living alife of healing can look Like.
I'm in a very good place.
I feel I struggle every singleday and I know how to handle it.
That's the beauty.
Every single day there's newdifficult things that happen,
(35:55):
but I feel I'm able and capableof handling it in a way that I
definitely was not able tohandle in the past.
Speaker 2 (36:03):
And what a great.
I mean I don't know.
So often in especially Westerncultures, with the Hollywood
ending and different stuff,people are either good or bad.
That's how we hear it.
We hear it in the news, wherethis person is a horrid, tragic
story of whatever and there's noredemption but there's no
ability to truly be human inthat and it sounds like just the
(36:28):
dichotomy of past to presentright, just the growth and the
change that can happen over thecourse of a lifetime, and you
still have more to go right, andI think we don't talk about
that enough, that it's not likethis isn't just the one story.
This is an entire lifetime thatebbs and flows and moves and we
(36:51):
constantly get a chance todefine who we are today.
It's not always the stuff fromour past that needs to define
what it is and who we are rightnow.
So I just I think it's reallyinteresting and fascinating and
wonderful to kind of share anexample of how that can grow
through someone's lifetime andhopefully help a lot of people
(37:12):
If they're younger and maybeyou're on a path that hasn't
necessarily been the mostbeneficial for them to see this.
This, this meet today, doesn'thave to be this meet in five 10,
20, 40, whatever years you know.
So yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (37:28):
Yeah, change is possible and it's the reason.
The reason we're here is tolike, learn and grow and change
and evolve.
Right Like that.
I truly think we are put onthis earth.
It's part of my spiritualunderstanding, in my faith, is
we are put on this earth tofigure out life lessons, to
learn to grow, to evolve.
(37:49):
Like that's it, and like youknow that's that's how the book
ends is like, okay, I'm stilllearning and growing, see you
later.
This is where I'm at now.
It doesn't end that abruptly,but that's the end.
But yeah, it's definitely.
It's so interesting to thinkabout.
Someone said recently like youknow, you have a legacy now,
(38:11):
like you could die tomorrow andpeople still know your life
story and well, that's a morbidway to think about it.
Speaker 2 (38:18):
But yeah.
Speaker 1 (38:18):
I guess that's true.
So yeah, no matter when I maygo, I have these stories that
hopefully can help people, maybeeven after I'm no longer there,
to share my stories incommunity.
You know that hope maybe thelarger community can still not
like that makes it sound like anego.
Speaker 2 (38:39):
That's not what I'm trying to say.
Speaker 1 (38:41):
No, no, no, I'm continuing the lessons and the
learning, because that's whatit's all about.
Speaker 2 (38:47):
It is, it absolutely is, and I don't know, but you
know, as a young kid you justknow I'd, my parents aren't
right, nobody older knowsanything.
And then you're like shit, yep,if only I had and some of that,
if you have to go through ityourself.
However, like Cheryl was saying, they're not feeling so alone
(39:10):
and that is incredible and Ithink for me that's why,
whatever type of art form it isthat you have, whether it's
music or written prose or, youknow, painting or whatever there
is a, there is an element ofthe human and me is now being
shared with the human and you,and it's so incredible to be
(39:33):
able to have that out there, toconnect with someone else, so
they don't feel so alone.
There's always going to besomething that they that speaks
to them in a way that notanything else might have, and
the fact that you were able toget that out is going to touch
other people in a way that theyneeded to hear it.
That was beautifully said, thankyou, I wrote it down Just
(39:54):
kidding, but it's true, I mean.
I mean Cheryl knows and theaudience probably knows to so
much extent now, but like I havemy mom's a musician and stuff,
and so it was always.
Like art is incrediblyimportant in life and I just I
feel that you know, if I'm downand I really need to listen to
some music, that's going to helpa lot of people even feel the
(40:17):
sadness.
Right, not necessarily gettingme out of that, but just to feel
that sadness, to know thatthere are someone else can
really understand what is goingon at this moment with me is I
mean, there's just no way todescribe that and art is the way
to do that.
So yeah.
Speaker 1 (40:36):
Absolutely.
Speaker 3 (40:37):
Yeah, it's interesting.
I know, when I'm down I like togo to a bookstore Like that's
and we happen to have a majorchain near us and my husband had
to go pick up a CD.
And I went there and I saidcool, I'll go get a book.
So anyway, I purchased five.
Speaker 2 (40:56):
So I sound right.
Speaker 3 (40:59):
So I came home and eerily like devoured one of the
poetry books that I hadpurchased when I had a small
break during lunch.
So yeah, I agree with you.
I think there's somethingimportant about.
We just had this conversationwith Eileen's publisher,
actually a while ago, becauseshe had posited to us do you
(41:20):
think, do you like audio booksor physical books better?
I am, I'm a fan of both, but Idefinitely prefer the physical
book, and mostly because I folksthat know here I have a little
free library and it gives megreat joy when I see kids come
(41:41):
by and they grab a book, becausethat's something.
It's almost like a gift given,right?
And I feel that's the way yourbook is, is it?
It's a gift given memoirs.
Somebody had given us a quote awhile ago and I'm gonna bungle
the quote.
It's about something aboutmemoirs, our way to see
ourselves, and I feel like thatagain, I couldn't relate to all
(42:05):
of your story, but I couldrelate, certainly, to the fast,
certain facets of it, and it waslovely to feel not alone in
that moment and also feel allthose things that sometimes that
gets lost in the workday, likeempathy and hope and kindness,
(42:26):
and I wanted to personally say Iam grateful that your book is
out, because I think that peoplewill get a lot of that from you
.
Speaker 1 (42:34):
Thank you so much, cheryl.
That really means a lot.
I really appreciate hearingthat and, yeah, I mean that's
been the most common feedbackI've heard.
Actually, is this idea of metoo, right?
Yeah, you know I can relate, orthat's similar to my story, and
, of course, not all parts of it, but yeah, that's.
The whole part of humanity islike we all experience the same
(42:58):
life struggles, whether they invarying degrees and in varying
circumstances, but they're allthe same struggles.
Sure, you know it's fear,mm-hmm In all the forms, in all
the forms.
So, yeah, thank you for sharingthat.
I appreciate it.
Speaker 2 (43:15):
You're welcome and I mean, I'm not that I wasn't
going to have the book.
I want it now.
How can I order it to make surethat I have it signed?
Speaker 1 (43:24):
Yeah, so if you want it signed, you can just tell me
your address and I'll send you acopy.
We can make that happen.
But yeah, it's on Amazon andit's on Barnes and Noblecom, and
then it's also well, you're notlocal.
I was going to say it's not abookstores, but I did go into
the local bookstores and Isigned all the copies that were
(43:44):
in there, it's so awesome.
That was super fun, so yeah,but I can send you a copy for
sure.
Speaker 2 (43:51):
Ok, I'll make sure to order it in some of our local
bookstores here also, so thatthey can see it and have it come
sort of so.
Speaker 3 (43:56):
I know that helps.
Speaker 2 (43:57):
Oh, of course, Absolutely.
So I know we're kind of we'regetting close to the hour, and I
don't I mean Cheryl, thishappens more often than not that
we're like we could probablykeep talking for another few
hours, if I'm being honest, yes,and we're trying to be
conscientious of other people'stime.
So, with that being said, when Iget to our sort of last
(44:22):
infamous question is the this ishappening.
So for us, right, it is thisfeeling of something that that
we get, that we know is on ourhearts, that that we won't feel
is, you know, filled until we'veable to, to complete it or or
(44:46):
to do it.
This podcast came because ofthose three words, many other
examples that you know it's notnecessarily a bucket list type
of thing, but it's, it's a callto action and call to our heart
and our purpose.
So, you know, do you haveanything that you feel that this
(45:07):
is happening is applicable to?
Are there more books?
So, is there anything else kindof coming out next or things
that you're focusing on that youknow this is happening.
Speaker 1 (45:18):
Great question.
There are no more books insideof my soul.
I will say that.
Speaker 2 (45:24):
And you know that you just know it.
Speaker 1 (45:27):
Nope, that was, that was all I had.
That was everything, but no, afew.
Two things actually come tomind.
One is I do want to continuewith these learning circles that
I've been doing and trying toreach more people with them.
I think gathering in communityand being able to just share
(45:47):
what's on your heart is sopowerful, and you know whether
we use my own book or whether weuse other books.
Speaker 2 (45:53):
you know I I still want to keep reading a million
other books, because that's whatI love to do.
Speaker 1 (45:58):
So I want to be able to talk about what I, what we
can learn and take from thoseother people's stories.
So yeah, the learning circles Iwant to do more of.
I've been doing them once amonth for like a fall semester
and a spring semester, but Ithink I can, you know, add in
others and try to make that, tryto reach more people that way.
(46:18):
But the other thing that cameto mind is actually work related
.
So I work in a local college andI'm really excited that I just
got a promotion and oh yeah,thank you, and they're allowing
me to hire someone else to workalongside me, and I'm really
excited to see the growth thereand to be able to like work with
(46:38):
someone and mentors you know, anew professional and really
trying to make some big changesat work.
You know, as in the intro itsaid, I work with young people
around alcohol and other drugsand health and wellness.
I really try to be, you know,an advocate for healthy living
and healthy lifestyles and it'sreally important for young
people to try to find some ofthese coping skills as early as
(47:01):
possible, right, and so I'mreally excited to see what, what
work we can do with systematicchange.
I think for a long time in mycareer I was working on
programming events, hosting ayoga workshop, hosting you know,
hosting trainings, but now I'mable, with the promotion, I'm
able to think more big pictureand I'm able to think about how
(47:25):
we can actually make change atthe root causes and at the
systems level.
So I'm really excited to diveinto what all that means for for
our campus.
Speaker 2 (47:35):
That's amazing and the stuff that will change lives
.
Speaker 1 (47:40):
Yeah, I think so.
Congratulations, I think so.
Thank you Very excited Sweet.
Speaker 3 (47:45):
Sweet Katie.
How can people connect with youon social media or elsewhere?
Speaker 1 (47:51):
Yeah, so definitely follow me on insta.
That's where most of my mystuff will be, and it's Katie
being wellness.
I'm also Katie being wellnessat on YouTube A lot of the
meditations that are in the bookI have.
I read them on YouTube so thatyou know you can actually close
your eyes and enjoy themeditation rather than reading
(48:13):
it and trying to follow along.
So definitely check those out,and my website is be an agent
for change dot com or beingagent for change.
Speaker 2 (48:23):
Oh my gosh Even better and I love you even more
now.
Also, I'm definitely going onto your YouTube right after this
, because I feel like I coulduse one of those meditations, so
thank you, check it out.
Speaker 1 (48:35):
Thank you so much.
I appreciate it and it's.
I've had so much fun chattingwith you all, so I really
appreciate taking your time andenjoying good conversation over
a cup of tea on a Friday night.
This has been lovely.
Speaker 3 (48:49):
That's awesome.
Thank you so much and thank youfor joining us.
This concludes our episode ofyou.
Only go once.
Take care everyone Bye.
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