Love's Evolution: Holiday Reflections, Relationship Trials, and Embracing Authentic Connections

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What happens when love evolves and relationships are put to the test during the festive season? This episode of "Your Opinion Doesn't Matter" takes a heartfelt journey through the highs and lows of family dynamics and personal connections as we share personal stories that resonate with listeners facing similar struggles. From Sherri-Berry's poignant reflections on recent family losses to Mr. Lamont's inspiring visit to an assisted living facility, we share the bittersweet moments of the holidays, emphasizing the importance of community support and gratitude in times of sorrow.

Join us as we uncover the complexities of love—how it can sometimes blind us to imbalances in relationships and how self-love acts as a compass guiding us toward healthier connections. Explore the delicate balance of maintaining attraction and communication in long-term partnerships, and the ever-important role of open dialogue. We discuss the impact of societal expectations and the dangers of superficial connections, urging you to cherish genuine affection and value those who truly care.

As we brace for a new year, this episode leaves no stone unturned in discussing the importance of authenticity in relationships and the pitfalls of financial dependency and superficial standards. We celebrate the power of teamwork in achieving shared health goals and underscore the importance of mutual support. With a hopeful gaze towards 2025, we express gratitude for the lessons learned and the community that binds us, inviting you to reflect on the blessings of health, strength, and love as we venture into a promising future together.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome.
Welcome to the your OpinionDoesn't Matter podcast.
I am one of the hosts, mrLamont, and I'm here with the
unusual suspects To my left.
Sherri-ann, how are you doing?

Speaker 2 (00:14):
I'm doing well, Sherri-Berry.

Speaker 1 (00:17):
Sherri-Berry man, Forgive me, forgive me.

Speaker 2 (00:19):
Sherri-Berry is the one from this beautiful city.

Speaker 1 (00:23):
Yes and none other.
Black Jesus Sterling.
How are you doing?

Speaker 3 (00:28):
bro.
Yes, yes, I'm good.
Happy holidays to the wholecast.
Hope y'all had a wonderfulholiday.
Good to be here with y'all.
Same to you, same to you.

Speaker 1 (00:34):
And we have a new.
You know my expert opinion, no,or his expert opinion, lem.
How are you doing?

Speaker 4 (00:42):
I'm good.
I'm good, I'm happy to be here.
Yes, it's an oldie, but agoodie.

Speaker 1 (00:47):
Yes, he's new to the panel, you know he's going to
bring some.

Speaker 4 (00:53):
you know his little spunk and his flair Back with a
little talk His flair Watch it.

Speaker 1 (00:57):
Yeah, I should put the video with the Belba of the
Vogue.
Oh God, you're not going withit.
Yes, but yes, yes, it's goingto be fun.
Okay, christmas passed and youknow we're almost entering the
new year.
How was Christmas for y'all?
How was things?

Speaker 2 (01:13):
Christmas was sad but good.
Unfortunately for my family, wehad two losses I lost my sister
and I lost my cousin.

Speaker 3 (01:28):
Oh condolences, oh condolences.
Sorry to hear that.

Speaker 2 (01:31):
Within a week.
So the holidays are very, veryhard, you know, just seeing my
uncle go through what he's goingthrough, but so grateful for so
many things and you know I sograteful for so many things and
you know I made it the best aspossible.
My kids had a good time.
Everybody got what they wanted,so Santa was good to everyone.

(01:52):
So I am grateful.
I'm grateful for my parents.

Speaker 3 (01:56):
How was your story?
Yes, I kind of share the sameperspective.
I mean, inside the household itwas a good Christmas for us,
for the family, for the kids.
You know the kids got what theywanted, the wife got what they
want and everybody was happy.
And I mean it hit my pockets alittle deep monetary-wise, but
you know that's what Christmasis about.
But as far as seeing myextended family you know Sherry

(02:17):
Berry is my cousin I see themourning and the sadness it was
going through.
You know that kind of broughtme down, but you know that's the
reality of life and you know.
But again my deepestcondolences goes out to Sherry
Berry and her sister and hercousin, because they're my
family too.

Speaker 1 (02:35):
And how about you Liv ?

Speaker 4 (02:37):
It was good.
My Christmas is a little slownow, you know it's pretty small.
Slow now, you know, uh, it'spretty small, you know I'm I, I
talked to my wife about it andI'm like you know, my christmas
is on the same anymore, sincethere's only one small child
around.
So but seeing the joy of him,you know, getting his gifts and

(03:00):
his excitement, you know it wasit was a good thing, but you
know it's, all in all, it's agood christ know it was a good
thing, but you know, all in all,it was a good Christmas.

Speaker 1 (03:06):
Well, mine was pretty interesting.
Christmas was regular, like youknow, as far as that particular
day with my daughter, she had,you know, getting a lot of gifts
and stuff like that.
But Christmas Eve it was by thein-laws Things just you know,
ate a lot, so forth and so on.
But one thing the day afterchristmas, that was, um,

(03:27):
something that like moved me ina way.
I had went to my fiance's auntshe's in an assistant living
house and and I went and I wentthere and it was like we bought
her food, like food fromchristmas, and it was like it
was like it was like so feelingso down in there, like you know
people, a lot of people in theum, you know wheelchairs, and it
was just like.

(03:48):
it was just a sad feeling, likesad feeling, and when she saw it
she just started, she juststarted screaming like, ah, you
know, like happy and happinessit's happy and it was like it
was a, it was, it was verymoving and it was very moving
and I felt I need to, I need tostart being more active, like
far as when this new year start,I'm gonna start, I'm gonna
start giving back.
Actually, I inquired toactually start going there and,

(04:09):
um, you know, doing likebringing my game to do, probably
debating with them, or evenplaying chess.
Oh, they pointed it out sayingthis guy, this guy over there,
play chess.
All right, you know, I'll comein and I'll play chess with
y'all, you, you know, so forthand so on.
So that was pretty interesting.

Speaker 3 (04:26):
That was pretty interesting and she was probably
one of the lucky ones that gotvisitors on Christmas.
Right, right, right.

Speaker 1 (04:31):
And I seen a guy.
I seen this guy, he was lookingyounger than me in there and
I'm like and they had people hadnobody.

Speaker 4 (04:38):
Yeah, that's tough.

Speaker 1 (04:39):
And even though they said a lot of people was there
yesterday but like I mean like,like, how you could?
I don't understand how youcould have family and they keep
them there.

Speaker 2 (04:48):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (04:49):
And I mean.

Speaker 3 (04:51):
I mean different, different different.

Speaker 1 (04:54):
I can't call it but it's rough, it's a hard subject
because we know someone that'sin here.

Speaker 4 (04:59):
Yeah, it's a hard thing, man.
He's young so it's hard.
You know it's a hard thing.

Speaker 2 (05:06):
It's hard, you know it's a hard thing.

Speaker 1 (05:07):
Um it's hard, especially when I go see him and
knowing how I know him andseeing him there.

Speaker 2 (05:10):
It's, it's hard, but you know life happens and life
be life in, and you know wenever know what's gonna happen
and that's what people shouldtake into consideration in those
places right.

Speaker 3 (05:21):
You never know.
When you're in a situation likethat, the biggest thing that
keeps you going is the supportof your family right right, even
if you're in there, if theycome and support you, it's not
going to feel that bad.
But a lot of times when you'rein a situation like that, they
kind of abandon you and leaveyou under the care of the
facility, which which will leaveyou down in the press and yeah,
I feel you're not going to lastlong in a situation like that.

(05:41):
Yeah, that's.

Speaker 4 (05:43):
It's why we're talking about this, because, um,
my uncle, recently, uh, he hada stroke a few months back,
about six months ago.
He had all his faculties andeverything together to the point
where they didn't even know hehad a stroke.
He was in his house with hiswife, his children and no one
knew he had a stroke.
What happened is he got out ofbed and he fell and he's like

(06:07):
something's going on my left leg.
But he's talking to you nospeech impediment, nothing to
determine he had a stroke.
He stayed in the house for like48 hours, talking, eating,
carrying on normal, but he'slike something's up with my I
just my leg is just notfunctioning.
Finally, they decided, you knowwhat, let me just take him in.

(06:28):
They took him in.
They'd like he had a stroke.
They put him into a facility, arehab facility.
Like I said, cognitive skills,everything was on point.
He stayed in the facility aboutsix to eight weeks he started
to deteriorate, because you'rein one of those facilities and
this particular facility wasn'ttaking care of him, obviously,

(06:51):
the way they're supposed to.
So, from the time he had thestroke, where he was himself, to
coming home, he deteriorated.

Speaker 1 (07:03):
And what happened?
He's still in there.
No, he's home now.
You know what's so bugged, whatyou're saying I was like you
know, not to really keepspeaking about this, but when I
was there they was giving outcupcakes and stuff like that.
But the lady was like I reallywanted to be there because
there's a lady, she didn't care.
You're just like six donuts.
You're not telling people whatdonuts they want, you're just

(07:26):
shoving up.
You're shoving any donut.
Maybe they don't want that.
You know you got to take this,take this, take this.

Speaker 4 (07:31):
All in all, that's why these type of facilities
Unfortunately, we have familymembers that may be in need of
extra care Right that you can'tprovide in the home, that is
realistic Right that you can'tprovide in the home, that is
realistic Right, and these arethe decisions we have to make
these days.

Speaker 1 (07:47):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (07:48):
I was in the same position myself.
My mother wasn't didn't go intoany home.
We didn't do that.
However, the responsibility oftaking care of someone when
they're aging or they're ailingis a huge responsibility,
definitely Right.
When they're aging or they'reailing is a huge responsibility,
definitely right.

(08:08):
Um and um, we were watchingsomething about, you know,
certain blue zones.
There's a place, places calledblue zones.
That's where places in theworld where people live the
longest right, they have thelongest life expectancies when
they're in the facilities, no,in outside.

Speaker 1 (08:22):
in general, Blue zones.

Speaker 4 (08:25):
There's many different spots throughout the
world that they call blue zonesbecause the life expectancies in
these places people live longlives.
Part of the reason why is thatin a lot of blue zones, elderly
people are not put in facilities.
They are put to stay with theyoung, and the young show them

(08:47):
so much respect that it extendstheir lives and help them, lift
their morale, yes, yes.

Speaker 1 (08:49):
Or even animals.
They give them animals to um.

Speaker 4 (08:51):
These are called blue zones.
So it's die, and none of theseblue zones are in modern places.
Yes, yes, like you would think,america said oh, we have a long
life expectancy because theyjust put us on drugs.
These places are third worldcountries, of course.
They have people with lifeexpectancies of over 100 years.
It's because they care fortheir elderly, yeah, and they
respect their elderly, yeah, andthey make sure that they stay

(09:14):
yes yeah, that's what

Speaker 2 (09:16):
we believe in that's what we believe in and that's
that's extends life yeah.

Speaker 3 (09:21):
so as we move on, we're all talking about, uh,
holiday season and all therelationships we have with
significant others and ourfamily, and I just wanted to
kind of Use that to talk about,you know, our wise girlfriend,
things of that sort, and how wego about, you know, coupling up

(09:43):
with people like that.
So I'm a true believer throughexperience, that you know, when
we grow up, we all have a notionof who you know.
I see Whitney Houston orWhitney Houston is going to be
my wife.
I want to marry somebody likeWhitney Houston.
Or you have a certain girl inyour class.
I had a few with them.
I'm like yo, I want to marryher.
She's so beautiful.
But life never works out likethat and in the most cases, the

(10:06):
people that you're madly in lovewith, even if you get to be
with them, they really don'tgive that love back.
So I'm a true believer now thatyou must love those who love
you and I think that gives moreof a valid relationship where
you reciprocate the same lovethat you're giving back.
And I just want to ask peopleon the panel how do you feel

(10:27):
about loving those who love you?
Because I'm a big, I'm a bigfollower of those who love you.
You know what I'm saying.
How do you feel about it?
Anybody here?

Speaker 2 (10:37):
I'm a charmer.
I feel like you never know whenyou, when you, when you in, it
is true what you're saying andthat is the ideal that we all
want to run by.
But when you love somebody, youput in everything in the person
.
Sometimes it takes a a while foryou to catch on, if you

(10:58):
understand what I'm saying yesso it's like, you know, I, I can
love who I love and I'm puttingeverything that I want to put
into that person.
You on the outside is saying,well damn, this girl loved this
guy, but I'm not seeing him.
You know, doing andreciprocating as much as she's,
but I didn't get it yet becauseI'm so in love.

Speaker 4 (11:22):
Love is a dangerous.

Speaker 2 (11:23):
It is a dangerous thing.
Love kills you when you trulylove somebody you can tell
somebody, you love them, butwhen you're in love it's a
different perspective oneverything, and I'm going to hit
our audience with this.
Is that I was a girl that Idon't care, you don't like me, I

(11:44):
don't like you.
Next, keeps it moving.
I don't got time.
You cheat Whatever.
Nigga.
That was me.
And I'ma just touch on saying ittook me honestly to find
somebody that I really love andI really love the person that
I'm talking about and I trulycare about that person.

(12:05):
And it also took me gettingsick and being down to realize
that when you in love, youreally in love.
So maybe on the outside peoplemight say, oh well, I don't see
him putting the you know theenergy or whatever.
That's your opinion and it'syou know it's your opinion.
But when you love somebody andyou deep in love, you don't

(12:28):
always see that it's a good,it's a good gesture, but you
don't always see it becauseyou're so into that person.
I only see that person.
So you could tell me I got himwater and he didn't get me water
, so what?
I love him.
Yes, it water and he didn't getme water.
So what?
I love him.

Speaker 3 (12:46):
It don't matter, would that be?

Speaker 1 (12:48):
settling, like when you say you love who love you?
Not you anybody, I'm talkingabout.
When you say you love who lovesyou.
What does that mean?

Speaker 3 (12:54):
I think when you're in love it puts you at a
disadvantage sometimes,especially when you're
overflowing with it and theother person sees that, they
kind of can take advantage ofthe situation.
And I've seen it happen manytimes.
It's human nature.
If you know a girl that'sreally sweating you and you know
, no matter what, she's deeplyin love with you, as human
nature, as a man, you're goingto push it.

(13:15):
You're going to push it to seehow much she's going to take.

Speaker 4 (13:17):
You understand what I'm saying, see, but then you
could end up losing on love.
See, losing on love, see, butthat's the point.
So the thing is about love,right?
I think we we probably gonnaprobably all agree upon this.
Love means different things atdifferent stages in your life.
When you're younger, you have aperspective of love that's

(13:37):
different than when you wereolder.
Of course, that's why it's verychallenging to be in
relationships for long periodsof time, especially when you're
starting off in adolescence,like you'll see, people who got
married very young, 21.
By the time they're 45.
They went out.
Yes, because that person nowyou've evolved.

(14:01):
If that person's not followingyou in your evolution, that
could be a challenge.
If you look back at your21-year-old self and the person
you were in love with at 21, ifyou met him today, would you
love him?
No, absolutely not.
So our feelings on what love ischanges in different phases of

(14:26):
life.
You just talked about achallenging situation where you
got a chance to understand howmuch you love this person,
because it became crystal clearin time of crisis.
Before that, you might be liketaking it for granted of who
this person is until they showup.
So love is an evolution,evolutionary change in life.

(14:50):
Different things mean differentthings.
Now, as we're talking aboutlove who love you.
You brought up settling.
That may be a perspective froma person that hasn't understood
what love is or doesn't lovethemselves.
Yet when you start to loveyourself, you end up being able

(15:10):
to see who means what to you,and it's normally people that
begin to show up.
If you're smart, a person thatshows up for you you become to
stand in love.
When we fall in love is forpeople that maybe mistreat us
and we're attracted to anegative energy Right Falling in
love with some sort ofperception of what love should

(15:34):
be, just because there's alustful energy or we got caught
up into it.

Speaker 2 (15:38):
There's a difference between love and lust.

Speaker 4 (15:39):
Yes, but a lot of people misconstrue them.

Speaker 2 (15:42):
Especially when we're young.
Yeah, they think of the samething, especially when we're
young.

Speaker 4 (15:45):
They think of the same things, especially when
we're young.
Infatuation, yes, that lustfulenergy, that, that lustful
energy, that shit lasts only fora little while.
So now you pointed it out,sterl.
You said you know, because,especially with men we discuss
this off camera A lot of timeswith men, when a woman is doing
too much, especially in ouryouthful years, we're like hold

(16:07):
on, hold on, hold on.
It's a little overwhelming.
Hold on now.
That's not what we want.
We kind of want, want theenergy like I don't give a fuck
about you.
We're more attracted to thatyeah, yeah, because we got so
much validation from dealingwith different women.
But as you get older, thatperson that stands up for you
and is there, like you want toplay the food, of course I'll

(16:29):
call in to check on you.
Yeah, I want to do this.

Speaker 2 (16:32):
Things that we thought were overwhelming is now
something that we look for as astandard, but a man knows when
he's ready to be in love.
I feel like.
I feel like I could be wrong.
No, you're not wrong, I'm justsaying that a man sometimes
knows like, okay, I want to givethis a chance, because you

(16:54):
could like somebody and youcould say, I think she's pretty,
she meets all the standards onthe physical attribute.
You're looking at her, you'relike, okay, she's sexy, she
carries herself nicely and stufflike that, and you could fall
in love with that.
But then when it comes in and Isaid that, said that to you, I
said there's women that I knowof personally.

(17:15):
These girls don't cook, thesegirls don't clean.
These girls nails is alwaysdone, hair's always done, body
is nice, but they don't know howto keep and how we how.
I know when you.
You know you have to know howto cook, you have to know how to
clean, you have to know how tokeep and how.
I know you have to know how tocook.

(17:35):
You have to know how to clean,you have to know how to carry
yourself.

Speaker 4 (17:40):
When I check off all those boxes, I always say I
check off those boxes.
I can dress.

Speaker 2 (17:44):
I think I can dress.
I think I put myself togethernicely.
I like my nails done, my hairdone.
You can eat off my floor.
I know how to cook.
I know how to keep a man.
I know what a man needs.

Speaker 3 (17:57):
And you raise respectable kids.

Speaker 2 (17:59):
Yes, my kids have to know, even if that's not your
father.

Speaker 1 (18:03):
Good morning good afternoon and give respect and
know how to do those things.

Speaker 2 (18:07):
We don't get the rings.

Speaker 1 (18:10):
We don't get the ring .

Speaker 4 (18:12):
No, you can't.

Speaker 2 (18:13):
I can only speak off of what.

Speaker 4 (18:14):
I've been.

Speaker 2 (18:15):
We don't get the rings, we still fighting for
that to be, you know, okay, tobe the wife you say oh, that's
my wifey, or that's this, butyou're not giving me the ring
when you come, your plate getsserved.
You're not just getting bullybeef and rice, bully beef and
rice not just getting bully beefand rice.

Speaker 4 (18:48):
Unfortunately, I I talk about this all the time I
have these conversations with,with female friends, my, my, my,
unfortunately, due to societyand environment that we have
grown up in men take a very longtime to mature before they can
understand that that's important.

Speaker 2 (19:05):
Even older men don't always change no, no, no.

Speaker 4 (19:09):
Hold on, age is not maturity as far as I'm concerned
.
You know what I call old menwith those mentalities Grown ass
babies.
Okay, because it takes a longtime for men to appreciate that.
So what you're saying arethings that if a man is
emotionally mature he canappreciate, right.

(19:29):
We're using terms like fall inlove.
I'm talking about like traumas.
Men are attracted to peoplethat don't treat them right
Women too.
That's why you always hear thebad boy image oh, I want a bad
boy, bad boy, bad boy.
All of that is childishmentality.
A man wanted a woman thatchallenges him to the point
where he don't know where she at.
That turns him on.

(19:50):
A woman who wants a bad boydon't know what he doing if he
working, but he have money andhe have a car, but she don't
know where it coming from.
All of these are people withedges, right that opposite sexes
are attracted to, and thenthey're looking past the stable
guy who might be a little geeky,or the woman that's going to
cook the food, but you can beattracted to the people.

(20:13):
People still want people with anedge.
It's for some reason people aredrawn to people.
They can't have a grasp on Awoman who my father said this
years ago and he told me.
He said you have to be an anyhours man and I was like what do
you mean by that?
He said even if you come off ofwork 6 o'clock, don't come home

(20:36):
at 6.15 every day.

Speaker 3 (20:40):
you have to have an element of unpredictability come
home 7.15 next day come home 9.

Speaker 2 (20:47):
Friday come home at 6 ?
You should not, because the onetime you show up late that's
going to be a problem.
I believe in that.

Speaker 4 (20:54):
No, you don't want her to have that edge on you.

Speaker 3 (20:55):
Because, the one time you show up late, it's
bacchanal.
I believe in that.
Yeah, I'm an advocate of that.

Speaker 4 (20:58):
And that's the edge you got to have.
I'm not saying you got to makeher pace around at night, all
night, but you cannot havepredictability because people
like an edge, just like whenyour woman calls you.

Speaker 3 (21:10):
You don't pick up the phone every time the woman
calls you.

Speaker 4 (21:13):
Can't be too accessible.
Yes, can't be too accessible.

Speaker 1 (21:16):
I don't agree, though I don't agree with you.
Got to love who love you.
Suppose two women love you.
What do you do?
What you?

Speaker 2 (21:22):
doing that.
These two women love you.
I'm just saying Know what I'msaying, so what, so what?

Speaker 1 (21:28):
But but no, I don't believe that.
I don't believe.
I believe it's going to happen.
It's going to happen.
You don't love them justbecause they love you.
I don't believe that.

Speaker 2 (21:35):
I don't know if that's what y'all said no no no,
no, what I'm saying when you'rein a relationship or you like
somebody, and what we weretalking about, me and Sterling,
we were saying when you're withsomebody and you're showing more
love to that person, that thatperson is showing to you, but
you're still.

Speaker 1 (21:54):
You're forcing it kind of because you're like
doing the most to be in lovewith that person, but that
person is not showing you thelove and then when you exit, and
you might see somebody thatlikes you but they don't meet
all the qualifications.

Speaker 2 (22:07):
But they got everything, all the boxes
checked off like they're lovingyou.
That's who you need to show themost love to, because that
person is actually showing youlove.

Speaker 1 (22:19):
That's the perspective.
That's the perspective.
Let's be clear Once againthat's the perspective.
That you coming at it like,okay, you know you're putting a
lot into this and this person'snot reciprocating, of course, so
you be like all.
So you'd be like all right.
No, this person don't love melike I love her.
So then I'm out, that's whatyou mean by when you say love
love love.
They mean give it equal, equalkill.

Speaker 3 (22:39):
Yeah, it's like that movie Somebody that is going to
give you a woman is going togive you 85%.

Speaker 1 (22:43):
Right, I didn't understand.
I thought you said you werewalking.
I think there's more to it too.

Speaker 2 (22:56):
Let me elaborate.
I forgot that movie too.
What was that movie Sterl?
I forgot that movie with JanetJackson.

Speaker 4 (22:59):
When he gave her the indecent proposal.
We talked about that from thelast year, elaborating on love
who love you also.
Really, I think, to bring itall together, the reason why
we're saying love who love youis meaning don't look for the
greener grass.
That's what love who love youmeans.
If this person loved me, then Ishouldn't be looking further
than that past.
That Love who love you becauseyou said, isn't a settling right

(23:23):
.
When people say I'm settling,that means they believe there's
something better than that.
They're looking past what's ontheir plate and what's right in
front of them A person who'scaring for them, loving them.

Speaker 2 (23:37):
But they're like you know, we're missing them,
Because if I'm giving you all ofthat and you're not showing me
back, then you're not.
There's something missing.

Speaker 4 (23:46):
Something in the person that's looking past you.
If that person becomes theperson they should be meaning.
Here's all the person with allthe attributes here.
Right, it has to be somethingsimplistic that means what
they're not physically totallymy type.
Or I have a checklist that aperson didn't check off one or

(24:07):
two boxes.
So I'm looking for someone thathas these attributes but is
more physically appealing to meBecause loving who loves you and
you're looking past it ifyou're looking for something
else, by him saying you'resettling.

Speaker 2 (24:22):
How about when you're in a relationship and the
person that you met checked offall the box when you first met
and you're going, and you know,when you've been with somebody
for a long period of time,people change their physical
body, changes Maybe the way they, you know some women, they get
complacent.
They, you know, if they used togo to the gym, now they're not

(24:44):
going to the gym.
If she used to do her hair andthat something turned him on,
now she feels like a ponytail isjust is just good enough, and
those things.
What do you do?

Speaker 4 (24:54):
What do you do?
Get him involved?
What do you do?
Or?

Speaker 2 (24:57):
some men don't say anything, which I think is wrong
.
I feel like if you love theperson, it's a serious
conversation that you need tohave.
Like, babe, I don't like theway that you look and women
don't take it as a negativething Open your ears and listen.
Another thing I've learned isstop listening to yourself and
listen to your partner, becausehe's telling you something in

(25:18):
between those lines that he'ssaying.
If he says you know, I don'tlike the way you do this, or I
don't like that, or he said thatmore than once or twice, take
note to it because he's actuallyhinting you to things that he.
Or if he says I'm'm gonna leaveand you're not taking note,
he's telling you that becausethat's the, that's the way or
the direction that he's leaving.

(25:39):
So and I could only say that,because those are situations in
life, that real shit thathappens- to people has happened
to me.
So it's like, if you love theperson, start taking note,
mental note to what the personis saying.
He's not always a down thing.
Like he's not always downing you, he's probably really telling
you this because he loves youand he's saying to you I'm at my

(26:02):
with and without saying I'm atmy with and pay attention, ring
the bell, pay attention andstart taking notes.
So if you caught going to sleepwith his t-shirt all the time,
he's like babe, this damnt-shirt thing ain't working, you
know, and you're like that's mycomfortability, come out of
your comfortability because thet-shirt shit is not working.

Speaker 3 (26:24):
So sometimes it's not even what you say is how you
say it.

Speaker 4 (26:28):
That's true Delivery.

Speaker 3 (26:29):
Yeah, it's about the delivery and sometimes you want
to be a little sensitive to thewoman.
So if you see if the woman'sbecoming a little overweight,
you know, do a little thing likebaby.
You know, let's go jogging.
Let's go to the gym or she'sgoing to bed with these big
panties on.
Oh shit, you rip them up andthrow them out and you go to.
Victoria's Secret and you buysome new panties and you buy

(26:52):
some new lingerie.
It's a gift, you know.
Try that one so you have tolike again.
It's not what you say, how yousay it.
Sometimes you got to.
You know women are sensitiveand you don't want to be too
harsh, but it depends on yourrelationship too.

Speaker 2 (27:05):
It depends too, because if we coolers and we
could talk about everything.
Hit me right, tell me rightaway, because I don't want to
come in every day doingsomething and you really unhappy
with this, but you're bitingyour tongue, because it goes
with friendship, it goes withrelationship, it goes with
everything.
If I didn't know that youdidn't check for me and I'm

(27:26):
doing everything the same thinghow am I going to know that you
didn't check?

Speaker 3 (27:29):
for me, sherri-ann, it's time, I agree.
But it's tough to talk to women, sometimes Not all women Not
all women Hold on.

Speaker 2 (27:36):
It all depends on the relationship 95% of the time.

Speaker 1 (27:39):
it's hard to talk to women, so I'll chime in.

Speaker 4 (27:41):
Oh my God, I'm surrounded by a bunch of men
here.

Speaker 2 (27:43):
No, no, no.
Let me tell you why.

Speaker 3 (27:45):
I'll chime in.

Speaker 1 (27:45):
We're not going to bash.
You could say it to a womanabout, about, listen, darling,
listen, you know I'll go withyou to the gym, or blah, blah,
blah.
They're going to look at youfunny, man, see.
So now They'll look at youfunny.
And then the thing about it isis that you could then sometime
you just lay off and be like allright, whatever.
Then you'd be like whatever.

Speaker 2 (28:06):
I don't feel like you should be whatever work out, I
love working out, I love workingout, but I've gotten lazy at
some point.
When it gets cold, I startmaking excuses oh my knees, oh
it's cold, and stuff like thatand then you don't go.
But if the person that I'm withis like listen, you're falling
off.
You used to go every day.
What happened?

(28:27):
Now I'm like you know what?
You damn right.
I need to get back in the gymFor myself.
But I'm going.
But I got reminded like, no,you used to really like working
out, you used to really likehitting the gym.
You like this.

Speaker 3 (28:40):
That was a great philosophy.

Speaker 4 (28:41):
But also you talking about you.

Speaker 3 (28:42):
See, you're very receptive to that type of thing
you have to be.

Speaker 4 (28:50):
But, even in friendships, even when you have
a friendship, we have less.
We have less social pressurethan women.
Us as men, we have less socialpressure, so I can understand
the overwhelming amount ofsocial pressure women have.
So it makes you sensitive.
Sometimes, even when ourdelivery is right, it's still

(29:14):
hard to digest because.
So even in a friendship wherethere's communication I'm a
piggyback on what Sterl said youcould initiate it as a man.
I think the best step is toinitiate as a man by not
verbalizing, maybe falling off,because we just can't do that.
You are somebody that canhandle that.
Whatever, because you, you'rehere with three dudes and you're
holding your own.

Speaker 3 (29:33):
So we know that.
But I mean yeah, exactly,you're a guy's girl, you're a
guy's girl, you guys girls.

Speaker 4 (29:42):
there's a lot less guy's girls than girl's girls.

Speaker 2 (29:45):
Well, I would love for my man to tell me, listen,
you're getting too fat.

Speaker 4 (29:49):
Listen, come on, you can handle that so delivery is
important.

Speaker 2 (29:52):
I like what you did it this way.
I like what you do.

Speaker 3 (29:54):
All right, let's work that out.
Not everybody can handle thatwe're trying to get to the work
they can't handle, see, actionis more important.

Speaker 4 (30:00):
So, action is more important, like you said.
Those are the steps, I think,as men, when we're in a
relationship now and we feelthings aren't going our way,
instead of just verbalizing it,taking action is what we should
do?
I feel like that's being funnyhey wake up, let's go work out.

Speaker 3 (30:14):
Let's go.
Hey, we're going to go jogging.

Speaker 2 (30:16):
Let's go walk around the track yeah, I'll tell you a
horror story about somebody Iknow right.

Speaker 4 (30:21):
So even with that, he thought he was in a good
relationship.
He was with this young lady.
She was overweight.
He got with her.
They were friends.
She was um.
One question was she overweightwhen he met her?
Yes, morbidly, okay, morbidlyoverweight.
I mean a hundred and somethingpounds overweight.
So she was on the border ofphysical problems.

(30:42):
Yes, they were just friends.
I watched this man walk withher on the track.
For weeks.
I'll be out there running,working out and and I'm like man
, this dude, I'm looking at him.
I don't know if there's anyromantic connection, not at this
point.
He's on the track with herrunning.
This woman loses a hundredpounds.

(31:03):
And she laughed at him, laughedat him as soon as she got set.

Speaker 2 (31:06):
What did I just say?
He never loved him in the firstplace.

Speaker 4 (31:11):
He never liked him in the first place, no, so listen
listen.
I don't know that to be true,but I'll tell you what we, to
piggyback on what we weretalking about earlier.
Some people are as faithful astheir options.
Yeah, remember when we weretalking about love?
Who love you?
Yeah, she might have thoughtshe loved him, but now her
options opened up.

Speaker 2 (31:33):
Because now she's slimming, she's looking sexy and
now she's sour and now wouldthat be insane, that's terrible
but, love will love you, right.

Speaker 4 (31:46):
So to piggyback on love will love you.

Speaker 2 (31:49):
He was loving her he loved her for who she was.
But then, when she realized,she had more options.

Speaker 4 (31:57):
She wasn't loving who loved her.

Speaker 1 (31:59):
That's why you gotta be vicious.
You gotta be vicious.

Speaker 2 (32:02):
If she was standing here or she was on the front, I
would say girl, you a fool.
Yes, Because you know what.
What you chasing after, youprobably would never get again.
Absolutely not, because if aman can love you when you're
physically down or when you'renot good.
That's a man that you need tohold on to and you need to
understand, because when youwalk outside, I always say, when
I walk outside and brothers, belike you, look good, you look

(32:23):
good, you look good.
The only good I want to hear isfrom a man that's dark
chocolate, six, three and built,and that's the man that I'm in
love with.
And that's the man that I'm inlove with and that's the man
that makes me happy, that's theman that puts a smile on my face
.
All y'all are just sayingwhatever you want to say,
because he has been there for methrough up and down and bothers
her, and that's the person Iwill stick to and I will stand

(32:45):
hard for anytime.
So that girl, she's a fool,because what you're chasing
after is a moment.

Speaker 4 (32:51):
This is what I'm saying, what you're chasing
after is a moment.

Speaker 2 (32:54):
That's not love.

Speaker 4 (32:59):
You would think love who love you.
Because we're making it soundsimple.
That's why we're talking aboutthis.
Mind brought up, you could besettling In that particular
predicament.
You would think she would haveloved who loved her.

Speaker 3 (33:13):
But when her options grew, and she probably did at
that moment until her optionsgrew, until her options grew.
That's why you got to bevicious.

Speaker 1 (33:21):
That's why you got to be vicious.
You don't have to be viciousbro.

Speaker 2 (33:24):
You got to no what you have to be is diligent.

Speaker 4 (33:27):
You have to be diligent with the person that
you give your energy to, andthat means beyond just a
checklist of what you think youneed.
Right, you have to take heed towhat's exactly in front of you
and what is going to help yougrow now, since we're speaking
of checklist, we don't.

Speaker 1 (33:44):
We're talking about perspective as far as love and
the checklist, but, like before,it's like a checklist in
general, like as far as whatwomen want and what men want.
Whose checklist is more absurd?

Speaker 3 (33:56):
Well, korea women Korea women.

Speaker 4 (34:00):
Well, don't just say Korea women.
There's reasons Don't just sayKorea women, because it's a
broad spectrum that's like abrush stroke.

Speaker 1 (34:09):
What do you mean by that Sterling?
What do you mean?

Speaker 3 (34:11):
Women that have their life pre-planned from the time
they're 10 years old.
I'm going to graduate highschool at this age.
I'm going to graduate collegeat this age.
I'm going to have my PhD atthis age.
I'm going to get married atthis age and have three kids at
this age.
That's a complete checklist.
Yeah that is, and how oftendoes that actually happen?

Speaker 2 (34:34):
You call that artificial insemination at this
point.

Speaker 3 (34:39):
That very rarely happens.
It happens now, but without aman.

Speaker 1 (34:43):
What about unrealistic checklists?

Speaker 3 (34:46):
That's also unrealistic checklists.
First of all, once you have achecklist, you're being
unrealistic, that's a fact.

Speaker 2 (34:52):
Man or woman who has a checklist.
You're being unrealistic.
That's a fact.

Speaker 3 (34:53):
Man or woman who has a checklist.
You're being unrealistic.
Yes, yes, yes.

Speaker 4 (34:55):
Because, once again, let's look at what's right in
front of us.
When we create in thisunrealistic expectation of who
we should be with normally,we're not going to even be with
that person.
And if you did meet everybodyon your, if you met a person
that checked off every box onyour checklist, you think you

(35:16):
would be compatible with them.
Because you didn't check offany box on their list.

Speaker 2 (35:22):
I think your relationship would not even be a
relationship, because you'relooking for that checklist.

Speaker 4 (35:27):
That would be Exactly and you might not find it and
you might not feel like thatchecklist yeah, that's what I'm
saying you won't even get alongwith them.

Speaker 2 (35:34):
That would just complicate the relationship
aspect of everything.

Speaker 4 (35:36):
And especially it might be a hit or run.

Speaker 3 (35:38):
Yeah let's hear mine, let's hear mine, yeah, but look
.

Speaker 1 (35:46):
But women, not all.
They want them tall, they wantthem built, they want them to
have paper right right sure andthen and then there's times, and
like a lot of times, like thesewomen, when I'm saying absurd.
They look probably like a sixor seven but they want like a
ten, but like, hold on you, thesame guy you love, who you love
you.
Walk outside that guy, he lookssimilar to you, but no, you

(36:11):
want to go above and beyond.

Speaker 3 (36:13):
But you know why they feel like a 10?
Education, the degree.

Speaker 1 (36:16):
Nah.
They talking about their heart,the way they love.
That's the beauty inside.
I think it's a combination ofboth.
How do you feel?

Speaker 3 (36:22):
Absolutely.
The degree makes them feel likethey attend, Now saying
nothing's wrong for women havinga degree Accomplishment is when
they're accomplished.

Speaker 4 (36:31):
See, there's a difference between man and woman
.
Unfortunately, this is the casewhen women attain high levels
of success in general, monetary,education-wise they usually go
hand in hand right.
When they achieve a high levelof success, their standards for

(36:53):
who they want to be with istheir level or above.
Men normally don't care aboutthat.
They don't care.
You can be an accomplished manand a successful man and go get
a woman who has no education?

Speaker 1 (37:10):
And did graduate college and did graduate college
.

Speaker 4 (37:14):
Less criteria there's a less criteria, I think
there's less of a criteria whenit comes to men.
I'm not saying that in allrespects, but a lot of times men
think a little different thanwomen do.
When it comes to that, we do,we do 100% Go ahead, Sherri Go
ahead.

Speaker 2 (37:34):
I'm not going to give the oh-oh, I'm not saying that
you're wrong.
I'm just saying everyindividual is different.
Sure, that's for sure.
In all fairness, all individualis different.
I'm educated, I got my degrees.
In all fairness, all individualis different.
I'm educated, I got my degrees.
I went to school, I did what Ihad to do.
But if I talk to somebody, andI talk to people and I've dated,

(37:54):
you don't have to be there, butyou have to do something.
Sure.

Speaker 4 (37:59):
Of course you have to do something.

Speaker 2 (38:01):
So, I'm maybe one or two of the few women.

Speaker 3 (38:04):
Exactly Of course.

Speaker 2 (38:08):
I'm not here to judge you, because let me tell you
something Don't always comebecause the man is wearing a
suit and he's you know this andthat that he's a good man.
I'd rather have you have a job,a J-O-B, you can help me.
So if I have 20 and you have 20, we got 40 and we can build.
I'm all about that With mydegrees has nothing to do with

(38:29):
that, because when he opens hismouth he's very smart.
Maybe school wasn't his thingyou know what I mean.
Maybe you know going in classesand stuff wasn't his thing, but
he's smart, he can hold his ownand he's a provider.
I'm good.

Speaker 4 (38:48):
Just generalizing it.
We was just generalizing it,you're real.

Speaker 1 (38:50):
You are real, you are a diamond in the rough.

Speaker 4 (38:53):
We're just generalizing.
This is general.

Speaker 2 (38:56):
I feel like you don't walk around, when you hold
these men to all theseexpectations.
Don't get mad when you fall off, because life be lifing and
things can happen.
Happen and your degree can meannothing and you can have your
corporate job and they can walkyou out and you don't have
anything.
And you need that God to holdyou down.
And what happens if he judgedyou with all the degrees that

(39:18):
you have?
So I don't judge nobody.
I like who I like you got a jobthat's all I ask of you.
I don't care what your job is,but you got a job and we can
make.
I ask of you I don't care whatyour job is, but you got a job
and we can make it because wecan leave in a box.
But if we aiming to build intoa bigger box, we'll get there
together.
And I'm good with that.

Speaker 3 (39:36):
I think we're talking about the term only known as
boss bitches.

Speaker 4 (39:40):
That's what we're talking about.
We're talking about them.
Just an alert and a disclaimer.
The young ladies that don't makesure they're in a position to
be able to financially take careof themselves are leaving
themselves in a very vulnerableposition by getting with men
that are affluent, because youknow what happens in a lot of

(40:01):
cases she chases a high-valuingman who's successful financially
, successful financially, getswith him for 20 years and then
he decides he no longer wants tobe in this situation because it
doesn't stimulate him mentally.
Right, he went with a lustfactor, a young face, a pretty

(40:21):
girl, and now they're divorced.
He protected himself and she'son the street with two babies
and no education.
We see that happen more andmore now because of those
relationships that areunbalanced.

Speaker 2 (40:36):
But then you see that happening with females who you
know they do their BBLs and theydo all this I'm just saying
they do their BBLs and they comein the imagery and you know,
the lips is in this and theweaves along and all this, all
this stuff.
And because the man, you know,he likes that look, or you know,

(40:56):
not all men, but I'm sayingthey like that look their brain
hasn't caught up to the body,you know, they don't know how to
do anything else.
So now you're with him becausehe pays for everything and he
does all this, all this stuff,and you're in the moment.
But what we've seen is thatafter I done hit this a couple
of times and I hate to be raw,so excuse me after I hit it a

(41:20):
couple of times and I walk withyou a couple of times, what else
, what else can you bring to thetable?

Speaker 3 (41:27):
What else so now?

Speaker 2 (41:29):
he stays with you because of the imagery.
Like I like her.
You know she has her freaknumbers is probably 10 or
whatever, so he likes that.
But then he wants to get alittle bit more intrigued.
So now I can't take you to thecompany this.
I can't take you here.
I can't do this stuff.
You can't read something youknow we can, you know we can't

(41:49):
hold a conversation, we can'teven start a business, right,
you cannot do anything for me.
So now I'm tired of her.
And then now she's left withher BBBL and her nice lips and
the weave and all of that andjust waiting for the next one to
come along, and then you justbecome a bouncing ball.

Speaker 1 (42:04):
Yeah, but nine times out of ten.
I don't think them chicks withBBLs, I don't think we don't
like BBLs.

Speaker 4 (42:08):
first of all, they're not white for them.

Speaker 1 (42:09):
They're not white for them.
A lot of them are now.
Oh, a lot of them are white.
A lot of them have brains, butthey're trophies.
They're trophies.

Speaker 4 (42:19):
They're wifey for seconds.
No, they're trophies, a shortterm, right, yeah, okay, those
looks fade, of course, you know.
Okay, she's 50 with a BBL.
You doing that?
What?
Right, if that's?
The type of if you're a shallowindividual that started a
relationship with someone basedon looks, then the relationship
will be dictated because of thelooks, and when those looks

(42:41):
dwindle, you're going to getanother looker well, you see
people that keep going and a lotof women mimic that.

Speaker 2 (42:48):
Unfortunately, they mimic that look, you know what
I'm saying not just ig, or youknow, just tv shows, reality
shows whatever a lot of womenlook at these females and not
realizing that when the lightsgo off and the cameras are down,
these women have issues andproblems and all this other
stuff, but they don't see thatbecause they live in that

(43:10):
illusion.
So I want to be like her, Iwant to dress like her.
I want to do this because theythink they're going to go out
there and get anybody that theywant, or you know they.
They see somebody with a bigring and they want that ring.
You know, I know women thatturn that ring because the guys
couldn't get them.
You know, a big ring.
But he's doing stuff out of love.

Speaker 1 (43:32):
He's not doing that out of his, you know so you know
, I need to find a success story, like right now that BBL is
another passing phase too.

Speaker 3 (43:41):
Real men doesn't like BBLs.
Before we take it any further,real men out here do not like
BBLs, they don't, it's exciting.
At first you might want to ridea bike a few times.
But after that, but when youreally think about it, when you
walk, around and everybody looksthe same.

Speaker 2 (43:59):
Everybody has a skinny waist, a big butt and
chicken legs, Everybody Big lips, it's just.
There's no diversity, there'snobody, there's nobody that has
this kind of like look, becausethese females think that this
women, you can work out.

Speaker 3 (44:16):
Yes, you can work out .

Speaker 2 (44:18):
You can do your thing and let somebody like you for
who you are.
That's it, and I tell anybodyif you don't like me, because I
got a little stomach nigga, it'sall good.
Because my stomach is mystomach.
I got three kids, okay, andwith that I work out and I look
decent and I feel like I lookdecent.

Speaker 1 (44:39):
I can't be perfect, there's no perfect thing.

Speaker 2 (44:42):
There's no perfect.
And then remember women ittends to fade.
So, just like anything else,you get the BBL.
You got to keep it up, Becauseif you don't keep it up, it's
going to start to drop.
We're not going to be youngforever, it's going to drop, so
it's going to drop.

Speaker 3 (44:57):
Yeah, we live now for now in a materialistic world.
That's a problem right now.
I mean all of that man.

Speaker 4 (45:02):
There's so many shortcuts we were talking about.
We started to talk about, youknow, like talking to your
partner and changing lifestylesto become more healthy, of
course, and getting in shape, ofcourse, that's great.
There's so many shortcuts nowPeople want to eliminate putting
in hard work to get healthy.

Speaker 2 (45:19):
Everything is a shortcut.
That's a fact A pill for this.

Speaker 4 (45:22):
That's a fact.

Speaker 2 (45:22):
A pill for that.

Speaker 4 (45:23):
A shot to lose weight Nobody wants to work hard.
It's if you just and especiallyfrom a relationship perspective
, because it's teamwork required, you could uplift each other.
So I can't be in my housesaying I'm about to use the air
fryer and steam some vegetablesand do this, and then my wife
comes home with a box of Popeyes.

Speaker 2 (45:44):
That can't be that way.
We have to be on the same page.
You can't be.
But I cook different in myhouse.

Speaker 4 (45:51):
Yeah, but you can't have a mate that is totally
contradictory to you, especiallywhen it's health related In
order for growth.

Speaker 2 (45:59):
Yes, well, I can disagree, you can, I can
disagree.
And the only reason I say thatis because I have health issues.
Unfortunately, I've developedsome things that has happened to
me and I eat differently now,but I don't deprive anyone else
from eating fried chicken ordoing whatever, so I can't have

(46:25):
fried foods.

Speaker 1 (46:26):
I can't have processed food.
I can't have processed food.

Speaker 2 (46:28):
I can't have those things.
I've accepted that becausethat's my situation, that I'm
going through in life, and Ithank God.
I thank God almighty forblessing me, for even being able
to be here.
So now that I'm able to eat, orI can eat a little bit of it, I
still don't do it because Iknow where I came from.

Speaker 4 (46:46):
Yeah, you still want to go back.
You know what I mean, but Idon't deprive.

Speaker 2 (46:49):
I agree with you.
I don't deprive.

Speaker 4 (46:51):
I'm not telling you to Anyone from.

Speaker 2 (46:53):
I won't deprive him from eating a fried chicken.
He'll eat a fried chicken andI'm having steamed fish.

Speaker 4 (46:58):
That's not what I'm saying.
I understand that completely.
Saying is I'm not sayingdeprive people of that, but I
mean, if I'm in a relationshipwith you, for instance, and now
your dietary restrictions havecome apart, I'm not saying I'll
never do it, but I can't.
If you're having a time,there's some you have to join

(47:20):
somewhat.
You can't be like okay, my mateis just going to be eating
healthy like this and I'm justgoing to be eating bullshit all
the time, because it'scounterproductive as far as I'm
concerned.

Speaker 2 (47:30):
Well, you just say I'm one of a kind because that
stuff don't bother me.
It's a level of discipline,though.

Speaker 1 (47:37):
For me when I went on my healthy journey to lose
weight, to lose 30 somethingpounds.
I was at a point where, like,look, listen, the doctor told me
look, you got to lose weight.
Man, you got to lose weight.
And I'm like.
I went home, told my fiancewhat I'm going to do, and I
didn't expect her to join withme, and I said, and then, one of

(47:57):
the major things I had to do, Ihad to stop drinking.
So I said so first I stopped, Ichanged my diet first, then I
added the stop drinking part,but I did my thing separately.
I had to weigh my meat andstuff.
Like, oh pause, I had to, I hadto, I had to, I had to.

(48:18):
That was crazy.
But as far as that, you had tomake proportion, portion control
on certain things.
And, um, she and her and mydaughter and my stepson, they
was eating regular and thishappened for like two and a half
months or two, three months,and I don't mind like even right
now when I'm eating, eathealthy and she does what she
want to do, or even vice versa,I want to eat bad and she'll eat

(48:41):
healthy, but, um, it's not.

Speaker 2 (48:43):
I don't depend on somebody to help to make me do
this, right, right, you got todo it too.

Speaker 1 (48:46):
Because when you go to the doctors, you Right, right
you stand out.
And at that point I lost 38pounds.
I lost 38 pounds, I gained back, like you know, 10.
But it was something that I didby myself, sure.
It's on you but if you think,if you had that support, it
would have been easier.

Speaker 2 (49:03):
That's what I'm saying no, no, no, no.

Speaker 1 (49:05):
It would.
Of course, it would have beeneasy if you had that support.
That's all I'm saying.
I didn't have.
You see, there's a differencebetween no, I'm not saying you
had it.

Speaker 3 (49:11):
But if you had it, she supported you and it would
have been easier.

Speaker 1 (49:22):
What do you mean by support, iont?
This is what you need to do.
I'll cut the meat for youSupport.
I don't want her to do the samething I'm doing.
No, you don't have to, you guystalking about something very
specific, right.

Speaker 4 (49:34):
Health concerns is different for a change in, let's
say, diet and exercise.
But if it's somebody who's justsaying I want to change the
imagery, who I am and I want tolose 100 pounds, that's a whole
different story, because that'sby choice, it's not by necessity
.

Speaker 2 (49:51):
I think your partner can support you in different
ways you don't necessarilytotally make that point and, and
I agree, I feel like you can'tsupport in different ways you
know if, if you know, sometimesyou know like you could come and
say let's have a drink, but youknow that she can't drink or he
can't drink.
You're going to be like babe,you know what I know you can't

(50:11):
have a drink.
You know what I mean.
You know I'm going to make yousomething different, you know.
So it's different ways, people,you know there's different ways
people can help you, they cango with you to maybe to the
grocery store or look updifferent meal ideas and stuff
away.
So support is a different way.
As long as you have thatsupport it does make a
difference.

Speaker 4 (50:31):
At the end of the day it does make a difference to
know that that person issupportive.

Speaker 3 (50:36):
Like I want to eat fried chicken in front of you,
knowing that you're goingthrough it.
That's just me, you understand.
I'll hide and eat the friedchicken, but listen hold on.
Hold on hold on hold on Y'alltalking about support.

Speaker 1 (50:48):
You know I don't drink, and y'all drink in front
of me.

Speaker 4 (50:50):
I'm joking.
We're supporting the podcast.

Speaker 3 (50:54):
I'm joking, you know.
Y'all messing with my sobriety.
Y'all messing with my sobriety.

Speaker 1 (50:59):
Y'all messing with my sobriety, but no.

Speaker 3 (51:01):
I'm.

Speaker 1 (51:02):
I mean support comes in many different forms.

Speaker 4 (51:05):
Yeah, you know Right, there's no challenge, and I
think that's my problem.
Honestly, now we're going totouch about my issue.
When I'm going throughsomething, you better write
Right now Message.
No, she knows, she's like.
You know, it's a little bitdifferent.
I guess that's where we werehaving this discussion off

(51:27):
camera before and unfortunately,you know, I like to pride
myself on not being somebodythat's totally chauvinistic, but
I am the man in my marriage andI am.
That comes with leadership asfar as I'm concerned.
That's how I am that comes withleadership.

(51:47):
As far as I'm concerned, that'show I am.
So in my home, if the leader isleading in a certain way and
this is not a totalitarianregime or dictatorship, but I
lead by example as well I don'tjust tell you something.
So if I'm saying you know what,I'm about to change my diet,
I'm not expecting her to cookthat food.
I'm going to go in the kitchenand be like, hey, this is what I

(52:10):
cook for us and I'm going tomake sure it tastes good.
But I'm going to take the stepsto now, even though this is the
direction I want to go, I'mdoing it in a leadership way,
with action, not just words,Right?

Speaker 3 (52:28):
So I guess in some respects I'm like yo, that's the
chauvinistic part of me, andit's a little selfish too.
It's a little selfish too whenyou said make it sure it tastes
good.
It might not taste good to her.

Speaker 1 (52:37):
It tastes good to anybody.
Well, this has been a goodepisode, y'all.

Speaker 3 (52:42):
Very good episode, man.

Speaker 1 (52:44):
We touched on a lot of things, no ditty but yeah,
this was a very good show, man,and my part was for the new year
.
We have a new year coming up,man.
I'm just trying to get pastthis year right here, man, and
it's been very, very, very, veryA lot happened this year that

(53:07):
I'm not.
You know I'm not happy with man.
It's kind of I just can't waitfor the new year to start.
But I said that the year beforeand then look what happened.
So let me just be quiet andjust focus on health and making
sure that you know love, lovewho love you, right, love who
loves you.
You know, I thank y'all and youknow this is your opinion, it

(53:27):
doesn't matter.
Podcast and Sherri-Ann SterlingLem.
What's your parting words?
If you have any, sherri-ann,it's on you.

Speaker 2 (53:35):
So my parting words is as we transition into a new
year, I have a big surgerycoming up, so I'm asking the
almighty father to guide me.

Speaker 3 (53:49):
I pray as a witch.
You know that.

Speaker 2 (53:51):
Protect me through that.

Speaker 3 (53:53):
Absolutely.

Speaker 2 (53:54):
And also a lot has happened for 2024.
I'm so grateful to be here andso grateful to be, you know,
amongst the living and sograteful to be, you know,
amongst the living.
But I'm also taking with me forthe new year, me and keeping me
to me.
I love the place that I am witha very special person in my

(54:17):
life and I'm learning to grow.
It doesn't matter of my age.
I've learned a lot of thingsand I like the new me.
I like the woman that I ambecoming into Doesn't matter of
my age, but age came with wisdomtime.
So I'll tell all the listenersout there whatever you're going
through in life, take a time outfor you, live for you and your

(54:41):
life will become better.
So I pray that 2025 bring usall closer, that we find
whatever we need to, and I hopethat the listeners please listen
and share and you know, talkabout these things and you know
be more in tune to us, because Ifeel like we bring a lot of

(55:02):
interesting topics out here andI learn from you guys with your
feedback.
So I hope 25 brings bigger andbetter things for this gentleman
here, a great man that I've metthrough Searle and has very
interesting topics and brings alot of things to the community.
So that is what I hope, and Ihope you guys listen and love

(55:24):
this show as well, because Ienjoy I actually enjoy this one
very well.

Speaker 3 (55:28):
Well said, sis.
Well said yes.
Yes, I'm going to talk aboutthe new year too.
I'm going to reflect back on2024.
There was a lot of uncertainty,a lot of sadness, a lot of

(55:52):
sadness.
Um, my mom got sick and wasdiagnosed with uh Alzheimer's
this year.
So it's a struggle going onright now, but she has a lot of
support.
She's staying strong.
We also lost our family pet,her baby Spunky.
You know, I'm saying my momloved that dog, but then she's
gone.
But then, as we move into 2025,I'm a little apprehensive
because last year was so, again,unpredictable.
I'm not sure what I'm steppinginto, but I do stand here and I

(56:14):
give the lord all the glory forthe health and strength and make
me be here in order to seeanother day and for the, the
strength, my family and thosethat I love, my and in 2025, I
just could hope and wish for thebest.
Thank you, yes.

Speaker 4 (56:29):
Wow, that's a lot to follow up upon With the new year
coming up.
I mean, this was a tough yearfor us all.
It's just to piggyback oneveryone else.
But the great thing is that weare here and I'm grateful to be
here, grateful to embark on thisnew journey that we're

(56:51):
embarking on now, and just thepositivity in this room alone
from this first collaborativepodcast.
Many more to come.

Speaker 2 (57:02):
Yeah, I can just tell the future is bright.

Speaker 4 (57:04):
Yes, right, you know.
And once again, we still havehealth, we're still here.
Yeah, we're still of the living, so we can always, we have
another day to become better.

Speaker 2 (57:16):
Yes.

Speaker 4 (57:16):
Become better.
Amen, and my prayers are withyou, sis.
Everything God is good andeverything is going to be good
for you, Of course, and goingforward for the new year health,
wealth and prosperity Toeverybody.

Speaker 1 (57:30):
Nice, nice, nice.
Bless you.
Yes, and this is the yourOpinion Doesn't Matter podcast,
and we are outie.

Speaker 2 (57:37):
Peace, peace.